#these TWINS MAN. fucking improv?????

[shorthaltsjester]

god. i’ve been chewing on vex’s “save him.” to percy when she died in c3e114 for her knowing percy’s one-track vengeance mind reasons but i’m currently rewatching/reading through transcripts for unrelated rotting reasons and was reminded of the moment in c1e102 after both the twins had been killed (vex via power word kill iirc & vax via disintegrate) and vex was brought back only for the moment the fight ended to ask “where’s vax?” and her horror to realize her and her brother had both been dead and now only he was and that he’d been left alone (and she’d been left without him) and when vax came wandering out of the woods as a revenant but still undoubtedly Vax how vex was ready to accept him without question even when percy raised the very real question of vax’s identity, given that they were fighting the perversion of death and i’m just head in hands about the consistency and the heartbreak that is the twins and the fact that vax’s deal to ensure he would not lose his sister ensured that vex would lose her brother and regardless of the circumstances vex accepting whatever version of him she might get to keep: the one who walks loomingly out of a fey forest and the one who speaks stiltedly at her wedding and the one who is stiff as he returns her embrace while she explains the children who carry her legacy (and his as well, she’s ensured).

like. nearly 30 years ago vex came back from death knowing she left her brother behind only to soon learn that he’d be returning to not-quite-death in a matter of (little) time and that she’d have however long her life would be left to live without him. and then she’s on a battle field fighting to free a version of her brother that isn’t quite right, that is dead and isn’t, who is lost to her but still in her grasp, and she thinks she’s dying and she begs the man she’s gotten to spend a lifetime with (nearly the same length of a life that her brother’d gotten) to save him. and i wonder if that was a plea to save vax in the sense of somehow bringing him back or to release him to the raven queen, so that vex could be in the reach of her brother again, not the matron’s champion, even if she was dead alongside him.

[theriverdalereviewer]

everyone jumping to team kamala we will never experience true freedom in this country

[stardust-and-fries]

Oh boy!! A chance for me to yap about gender at length?!?!!?!? DON'T MIND IF I DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [See tags for details. But be warned... I Popped the Fuck OFF writing this one, it's a doozy!]

Sorry if this is rude, but how do you identify? I looked around a bit and couldn't find anything, my apologies

Not rude! Honestly, I don't know these days! Lots of thoughts swirling around in my head. Maybe this is too much, but also maybe saying something instead of keeping it inside will be helpful... I'll put my gender thoughts under the cut... maybe someone can relate and offer some thoughts lol:

Recently, I came to the conclusion that I'm really not attracted to men at all, and maybe, I never have been. Looking back, I can kind of clearly see that any crush on a guy I thought I had was more like "wow, this person is COOL as HELL. I hope we can be really good friends." And then I noticed, that any crush I had on a girl felt... different. The feeling was totally different, and it still is. Have you noticed how most of the men I draw are quite feminine? I also have no idea what's going on with my gender. I know I'm me, a Yugo, I also can't comfortably say what exactly I am. Though by technicality, I am nonbinary, the word doesn't feel QUITE right to use for me. Maybe genderqueer is better. I've never identified as a man, but I have identified as transmasc and taken T. I really do like the results I've gotten from that. But at the same time, I don't really feel close to "manhood" at all, but something about having a mustache sometimes, like I tend to do, feels right to me still. I also like to wear lipstick and stuff. I don't know. I'm also not a "woman" I don't think, but I identify with more... I don't know, masculine expressions of womanhood if that makes sense? I am very androgynous in expression, in short. So basically I don't know what the hell is going on. All I know is I love women LOL. Can anyone relate to any of this? Any ideas?? I will not be offended by any assumptions you might have lol. Maybe I should just make a comic about this.

[strqwberryscapes]

the weakness

summary -> you never saw your master's face, not once, during all the months of training. you think this is all a loyalty test. a way of having the upper hand. your master has his own reasons though.

hurt/comfort

she/her pronouns

content warnings -> swearing, canon typical violence, no use of y/n

a/n -> english is not my first language, but i tried my best :p

she was so frustrated. every attack, every strike she blew, was either getting deflected or doged. she tightened the grip on her twin blades. her master seemed so unaffected by the fight. so casual about it. and when he landed another painful kick to her stomach, she snapped.

qimir didn't see that one coming. he could sense her frustration. anger. and now his back hit the harsh stone, as his acolyte knocked his lightsaber out of his hand. she hit his helmet with her beskar blade. then another time. he let it happen, although all he had to do was to grip her throat with the force. qimir didn't protest when she knocked him down on his back. or when her hands made their way to his helmet.

she had enough of it. she was loyal, skilled, and spent months training under him. she felt an odd rush of adrenaline. power. it felt good. both their chests were heaving. cortosis felt cold under her bare hands, as she pulled it off of his head slowly.

and instead of victory, she felt defeat. instead of content, betrayal. and anger. anger, anger anger.

"qimir..."

her voice was breathless, and it cut through the silence.

"surprise."

was all he said. a smirk, a fucking smirk tugged at the corners of his lips. she got off of him to grab her blades. he summoned his saber. it was all a blur. his smug expression changing to a frown, and her fast movements. her throat felt sore, and she realised she screamed. he promised. he promised he wouldn't betray her like the jedi did.

he didn't offer much resistance, and it fueled her rage further. a few blows, and he was kneeling on the ground, her blades crossing at his neck.

"you're improving."

she was so tempted to cut his throat right then and there. her eyes stung and she tried to blink the tears away, so they won't blur her vision. so they won't blur the face of a man she thought she knew.

"go on, kill me."

of course. of course he was inside her head.

"you promised me! you promised-"

he tilted his head, his dark strands falling over his face.

"i didn't betray you."

so confident. calm. he wasn't qimir. whatever is that he was, he wasn't qimir.

"you didnt- you made me think you cared about me! you made me think i'm not alone, not a monster, not a tool!"

qimir frowned. she wasn't a tool. not now. not during her training with him. he didnt want her to think that she was. the entire ordeal played out different in his head.

"i do care about you."

pause. she almost believed him for a moment. her blades touched his pale skin. but she couldn't make herself do that. the stranger had the face of the man she loved, the dark brown eyes that provided comfort. she couldn't stop the tears falling down her cheeks, and she couldn't stop her weapons from falling to the ground. she couldn't stop herself from falling to her knees.

qimir was a sith. that's what he wanted to be, what he chased after. power. knowledge.

a quiet sob echoed on the shore.

but he will never truly be one. not when she's around. his weakness. a weakness he tried to eliminate many times. but now, he welcomed it.

he pulled her close. wrapped his arms around her defeated form. his weakness. his acolyte. his death.

her.

masterlist

reblogs appreciated<3

[constantnbpreg]

Think of a scenario that could be improved by being very pregnant~

of course there’s the classics like driving or going to a restaurant but a scenario i love thinking about that would be amazing to do while very pregnant is grocery shopping as silly as it sounds

i like to imagine myself my twins. gotta go to the grocery store weekly which means regulars who come the same time and day I do and the same employees get to see me get more and more pregnant each week. and because it’s twins, i’m getting big quickly. at first no one would notice anything of course. the small curve of my previously flat tummy is easily hidden by my shirts, barely pressing into my pants yet. just my little secret.

but every week starting after the day my pants stop buttoning though? oh that’s when the changes really start. as my tummy starts to really round out and become a proper belly i notice things. i notice how it’s getting harder to reach for things on top shelves without my belly getting in the way. the day i stretch to try and grab a can, my belly knocks over a bunch of products on one of the lower shelves and i am so embarrassed and lean i have to reach sideways now to not risk that happening again.

i think about me, standing in an aisle trying to find something and rubbing my belly as I do so. hand resting on the curve of it as i peer over my choices. maybe i’m looking at something i’m craving, not on the list but im sooooo hungry. the babies do nothing but kick me and demand me to eat it feels like. and by the way my thighs stretch my maternity pants and my new love handles, you can tell how all those cravings have been adding up.

all the walking i do up and down the aisles is when i start to notice im beginning to waddle a bit. my belly getting so big and heavy on my widening hips. i can feel how the added baby weight makes my ass and thighs jiggle as i move in a way they’ve never done before. it’s clear from my cart that gets more and more items for all my cravings how i got those soft new curves and as the babies get heavier, the harder it is to try and complete my grocery trip. the babies that my partner did such a good job fucking into me take after them in size which means they are biiiiig. and they’re only getting bigger from that point on. they sit heavy against my pelvis, and curve my back so much that it makes me groan.

the space between me and the cart too is nearly non existent at this point too, it just swells so much in front of me that i fear what i’ll do if i can’t reach past it. before i got pregnant i used to always use self checkout, but that’s nearly impossible for me now, trying to maneuver all those items by myself is too exhausting. so instead i squeeze me and my wide hips into a register line. i try and not just how much my hips have grown and spread but it’s hard to when i see how much they fill the small space. i pray i don’t get stuck by the end of this pregnancy, but by how these babies are growing, i better not test my luck.

the cashier would smile at me and like many of the customers i’ve passed, they’d ask me when i was due because it had to be soon right? i tell them i still got three months left and it’s big twins and i see the shock on their face because im just so gravid.

still by my due date, i’m still attempting those trips. my partner helps me though because i have to have one hand holding the underside of my baby filled belly and one supporting my poor back. no way to man a cart groaning as i make my slow way beside them and panting but smiling all the same. my clothes barely fit too, belly hanging out and ass near bursting through the seams of my pants. customers and employees stare at me as we pass, wondering how could be just so big and fertile. wondering why i would still be up and moving when it’s obvious how uncomfortable i am. and they’re right, i am but god it feels so good still being this pregnant and out.

and as we walk and chat about the babies and what to eat for dinner, i lovingly rub my belly thinking about how i’m so excited to do this all over again

[watarfallar]

Life Series Incorrect Quotes

Martyn: As top in this relationship, I think we should- Ren: I can't believe you're pulling rank on me.

Impulse: Are you sure Skizz's even gay? They barely even looked at me.

Skizz: How do you know how to kiss? Like who teaches you? Impulse: Well it’s actually a class, but unfortunately it’s full right now. Impulse: Would you like me to tutor you? Tango: That was smooth.

Gem, in Impulse’s bed: Morning… how’d ya sleep last night? Impulse, knocking Gem off: WHAT THE HELL?! Gem: Ow— Impulse: What were you doing in my bed? You were supposed to sleep on the air mattress on the floor! Gem: I had a nightmare. Impulse: You had a nightmare? What are you, five years old? Gem: Listen, I needed to feel comfortable and I was getting this perverse power dynamic vibe from me sleeping on the floor and you sleeping up there- Impulse, in a royal accent: Why yes, how high and mighty I am up on my twin XL! Gem: That is not what I meant— Impulse: Silence in the presence of your king, who sleeps a lofty twelve and a half inches above the ground! Gem: Listen, I’m not ashamed. I slept comfortably when I got up on your bed and I’m sure you did too. Impulse: Yeah, okay- Gem: You know what? I wanna know. How’d you sleep last night? Impulse: …That was the best I’ve slept in a while. Gem, gasping: The king slept comfortably with a peasant in his bed! Impulse: I did not consent to this- Gem, dramatically: But my liege, our love is forbidden! Impulse, on the phone: Hi, is this the front desk? Yeah, there’s a bed bug in my room and she’s six-foot-one, he’s got red hair. Gem: Ask them if they have one of those “Do Not Disturb” signs. I’ll put it on the door next time we… do it. Impulse: Okay, I'ma go shower and wash all of the you off of me. Gem: Oh, maybe together we could— Impulse: NO. Gem: Just to save water— Impulse: No! You don’t even pay for the water! Gem: …Good point.

Bdubs: What do you call quantums of electromagnetic radiation that don’t get along? Ren: What did you just say- Bdubs: Foetons! *Laughs* Ren: Wh-what?

Grian, at an awards show: Well, first of all, I’d like to thank Scar, the love of my life, for telling me Mumbo was going to win so don’t bother to prepare a speech.

Cleo: Bdubs, can you help me? All of my clothes keep disappearing for some reason. Bdubs, wearing a hoodie that's 5 times bigger than their size: Spooky.

BigB: What situation is not instantly improved by the addition of fishnets, I ask you. Scott: Being a fish. BigB: Well, shit.

Grian: I am an expert at identifying birds. Bdubs: Okay, what about those ones flying over there? Grian: Yeah, they're all birds.

Ren: I’m gonna die alone. Pearl: Ren, you’re not gonna die alone. Ren: Bdubs, was my safety net, okay? They got married and now I have to get a snake. Scar: Uh-huh. Why is that? Ren: If I’m gonna be an old lonely person, I’m gonna need a thing, you know? A hook. Like that guy in the subway who eats his own face. Ren: So I figured I’ll be “Crazy Man With A Snake”, you know? Crazy snake man. Ren: Then I’ll get more snakes, call them my babies. Kids won’t walk past my place, they will run! RUN AWAY FROM CRAZY SNAKE MAN!

Cleo, holding out a cookie for Lizzie: Look! This ones a heart, that’s how I feel about you! Lizzie: *Ugly crying* Cleo, holding out another cookie for Pearl: This ones like Michigan, that’s how I feel about you! Pearl, throwing their hands in the air: What does that mean?!

Grian: Did you wash the dishes? Mumbo: I thought you wanted to do that... Grian: *chuckles* You were WRONG.

Bdubs: Ren, I beg of you. Please, PLEASE go to the doctor. Ren: Hey, I'm sorry. Is this OUR stab wound?

BigB: Respect my trans homies or I’m gonna identify as a fucking problem.

Impulse: Everybody shut up, I'm thinking. Tango, patting them on the back: Well, don’t think too hard. I wouldn’t want you to hurt yourself.

Joel: What's with the new hat? Scott: Oh, this? It's nothing. Scar: It's the loudest nothing I ever saw. Cleo: Scott, you just can't mosey in here with a brand-new hat and act like you're not wearing a brand-new hat. Scott: Look, I'm trying something new, okay? Just take it easy. Etho: He's right, guys. Come on, let's not go down this path. It's ugly... Kinda like that hat– Scott: I got this from a nice store! Joel: What store? The one before you exit the Al Capone Museum? BigB, entering the room: What's up, Scott? Did you just finish Bling Ring-ing Bruno Mars' closet? Scott: I'm being brave, okay? You guys are sheep. You may want to take a long, hard look in the mirror. BigB: Better us than you. You look like a park ranger from a cartoon. Scott: Joel, do you think the hat looks bad? Joel: Oh, uh, me? Um, I... I wouldn't say it was bad. Like, I think it's just different, like something you would wear in Indiana... Jones and the Temple of Bad Hats.

BigB: Well Grian, I have to say, I'm really disappointed. Grian: Well, you didn't HAVE to say it. You could've just thought it.

[silusvesuius]

deux

this tree from my new drawing looking goated afffffff 👑👑

[mugloversonly]

It's Jealousy

Written for the @steddiemas prompt: “Cabin, Cold” Written for @steddieholidaydrabbles prompt: “Snowfall, Jacket” WC: 745 rated: G ao3

summary: Each week for these two events will be their own contained story. A chapter will be a prompt and the whole story will be in a series on AO3 when it's finished

The holiday cabin they rented was peaceful, but cozy. Set up like college dorms with two twins to a room. The original plan was for Eddie and Argyle, Robin and Steve, and Nancy and Jonathon to share. But on the heels of their break up, Nancy and Argyle switched. Steve hated it, he sat up the night before wondering if Eddie was “helping” Nancy with her break up. Then hated himself for it. Even if they were, it wasn’t his business. But the anxiety ate at him all night until, the sun barely peaked over the horizon, leading him here.

The snow fell in big flakes as Steve cooked breakfast, his stare distant as the rest of the house got up. His mood didn’t improve much and he was fully pouting when Eddie and Nancy came into the kitchen together. Nancy was wearing Eddie’s jacket. No one else seemed to be giving them strange looks, but Steve felt petty.

“Is that Eddie’s jacket?” He asked innocently. He noticed Jonathon’s head snap to stare at the pair. Eddie barely reacted beyond a nod, but Nancy bristled slightly.

“So what if it is?” She asked with that tone that Steve knew meant he was walking on thin ice.

“Just...wondering that’s all.” He said nonchalantly and looked away. But not before he caught Eddie’s eye on him.

“You think we were bumping uglies or something last night?” Eddie asked, calling him out with a knowing smirk that stripped him raw.

“Ew!” Nancy shouted before Steve could respond, as she shifted away from Eddie. He pretended to look offended for all of two seconds before he burst out laughing. Steve wanted to know what was so funny about that but before he could ask, Eddie spoke.

“Dude, she’s my cousin!” He shouted still cackling. He wiped his eyes as he explained, “her dad, my mom, siblings, man.” Steve stared in shock at Nancy, who started laughing right along with him.

“You’re cousins with the freak and you never told me?” He asked harsher than he meant to; the two sobered immediately. Nancy with a mean glare on her face and Eddie with a resigned sigh.

“The second you think I’m fucking your ex I’m resorted back to freak huh?” He didn’t even sound mad, just hurt. He pushed back from the table without a word, stomped up the stairs, and slammed the door of the room. It was barely a minute later that Eddie was bounding down the steps and out the front door, car keys in hand. His van roared to life but didn’t move. Likely he was sitting in it to keep warm but the snow made it hard to drive anywhere.

No one said a word as they watched Steve sit in his guilt. “I shouldn’t have said that. Or asked about the jacket. I’m sorry.” He whispered to Nancy.

“It’s not me you need to apologize to” she said back with a flick of her hair. “I didn’t tell you, because Eddie asked me not to tell anyone.” She sighed. “He didn’t want anyone to judge me because of who he was, the only reason Mike was in hellfire is because he was already different.” She stood, grabbed their plates, and turned away. “I didn’t want to hide it, but he made me promise.” She walked away to the kitchen.

Jonathon followed Nancy without a word as did Argyle. Then it was just Robin...and Robin had questions.

“Why did it matter if they were?” Robin asked. “Like, I guess it might matter to Jonathon, but why you? I thought you were over Nancy.”

“I am!” Steve sighed. “It’s not that I didn’t want Eddie to sleep with her. I didn’t want her to sleep with Eddie.”

“Because he’s a freak?” Robin raised an eyebrow. Steve turned angrily toward her, ready to defend Eddie, before he realized he didn’t have a leg to stand on. He deflated and bumped his head to her shoulder.

“Because I was jealous.” He leaned up to look at his friend. “I think I’m in love with Eddie.” He admitted. He was ready to be grilled and reamed for it, but instead Robin just rolled her eyes.

“I know Steve. Now, go out there, apologize, and explain.” She pointed out the front door.

“But…” Steve asked but she slapped her hand over his mouth.

“Shut up and go!” Steve nodded and bolted outside, forgetting his jacket and shoes in his haste.

buy me a coffee

[drenched-in-sunlight]

Hi there! I wanted to say your art is absolutely incredible and always brings me back to Elden Ring when I forget just how amazing the game is. I live for your depictions of Marika.🥹

I was partly just curious after you posted the recent family tree, is there a reaspn Ranni and Radahn don't make as much of an appearance in your drawings? What is your thoughts on their questline/storyline in general?

Thanks for all the cool art, you're getting better with every piece!!

tbh... i think draw Ranni a lot, she's literally the cover of my first fromsoft fanbook 🥲🥲

though most of my art of her is from 2 years ago, i wouldn't say i don't draw her often at all 😭 i've drawn Radahn 4-5 times too. i understand because i draw too much, it's easy to have an impression that i draw some specific characters less, but compared to, say, the Omen Twins or Rykard or Melina (who i keep meaning to draw but haven't got around to do so yet), Radahn and Ranni are two Carian characters i draw the most of that side of the family (well, Rellana is looking to dethrone them soon but you get what i mean aksfkjdfkj)

Radahn dudebro fans keep pointing fingers saying i hate him but i actually like him. as a guyfailure that is so obsessed with these symbols of a Lord in his father and Godfrey, yet failed to live up to any of them (*stare at that scene of Morgott whooping his ass*). his involvement in the DLC is an interesting spin on things to me, and make a lot of sense in the grand scheme of things (when i saw that we found like... 11 Miquella's Lily in places most personal to Radahn like Carian Manor and Sellia. hoo boy).

lately, i lowkey think Radagon specifically picked him for Miquella and encouraged his obsession with being a Lord. to me at least Radagon is really bitter that Godfrey is the First Lord and not him (her actual other's half! sentenced to live away from her while another man got to be her first in everything! the injustice!), so him not only discrediting Godfrey's descendants (whole thing with Hunters of TWLiD) but also preparing a whole new pair of Lord and God that should have been how he and Marika could have been from the start sounds like the kind of overcompensation he'd be doing (look honey that could be us but you tripping).

so in a way i do feel for Radahan and Miquella falling victims to Radagon's list of issues (though it's only one reason in many other reasons for them to turn out that way ofc. Radagon merely nudges the pieces into certain direction, they go barreling head first down on their own). and i actually like that i could come up with all that thanks to the DLC. imo it actually adds a lot more to Radahn and Miquella's character (depends on how you view the story though whoops).

you can say i like him (and Miq) the way one likes AC6 Iguazu... or Genichiro. the kind of hater characters that are doomed to fail from the start, but they are stubborn and will run head first into the wall again and again. and it's fun to put them in a jar and shake them.

Ranni... after the DLC my feeling for her is a bit more complicated. before i get why she did all those things and i like her story enough, but after the DLC as you see i come to really like Godwyn and links him closely to Marika. so now it's kinda awkward for me to insert Ranni in all the scenarios im drawing lately?

it's not that i stop liking her, it's simply that the scenario doesn't line up for me to add her in that's all. and it goes to other characters i haven't drawn tbh. not because i don't like them, i simply don't have anything in my brain about them to draw out. i don't think there's any characters in Elden Ring i hate tbh (yes i do like even the Hornsents. i find the stories in the scorpion stew and dried flower talisman really somber and give them a lot of humanity too, fucked up rituals aside).

and thank you for your kind words! my editor has been on my ass for a whole year about my art and it does help me improve a lot, im glad to know it shows in the quality of my fanarts as well!

[jessequinnfirstofhername]

So. Hilarious thought.

Palpatine dies via overindulgence in this or that Dark side ritual, he pulled a thing, his leg gave out doesn't matter important bit is he dead.

So you got Darth Vader. Anakin Skywalker just sitting their with an empire in his hands and no knowledge of Kenobi, Ahsoka or his Children.

god that be magnificent hilarity.

Vader:" I dunno, ill go invade the Hutts? can I do that? is nothing stopping me??? ok....."

but go imagine the meet and bitch eventually of Ahoka/Obiwan/Bail/Luke/Leia along with Grumpy Yoda.

cause Anakin is still being appalling Sith Lord? so much death and chaos? but he also does thing like shut down slavery finally, and catch a bunch of Moffs on some crimes here or there and he even improved Stormtrooper Armor!!!

makes ya feel conflicted.

Bonus Points on eventual him sitting in a meeting then Twin reveal. New Emperor Dad who does not want to be an Emperor but REALLY wants to be a Dad gets surprise 20 years later you ARE a Dad game.

Rebels get together to be all pluky hero to blow up the Death Star.... and.... its already destroyed.

huh. wind out of your sails there aint it?

Vader: " yeah that thing was a ridiculous waste I scrapped it down for Parts. blew up the second and third ones too."

Rebels: "...... the fuck are we even doing now man???"

I have nothing to add. I can't top how hilarious the mental images this conjures up are.

We love Failemperor Vader!

[charlie-pippin-faraday]

My danganronpa v3 chapter 6 running commentary:

"MY NAME IS MAKOTO??????"

excuse me you black-haired bitch you're not makoto naegi

bro what the HELL was going on in that cutscene i'm so confused

"if my actions result in your deaths so be it" nah there's something wrong here, that doesn't sound like that keebo i know

keebo's protecting us he's stalling keebo i love you i love you so much

guys i gotta level up my FRIENDSHIP POINTS to move ROCKS

ah shit fam we finally found kokichi's lab. it looks like a door from fallout in a literal tunnel underground lol

kokichi wants to be a batman villain so bad

is kokichi actually the ultimate improv comedian or something what is this

what is the "inconsistency" in the hope's peak academy book that shuichi pointed out but won't tell me? come on now don't leave me hanging. is it that makoto established the academy for normies actually? or is it something to do with the secret DR2 killing game?

i'm not wrong about either of those facts, am i? am i misremembering? didn't makoto say in i think the anime that he wanted to establish the new hope's peak for everyone and not just ultimates? and weren't the events of jabberwock island kept a secret from the general public? the fact that he was trying to rehab the remnants of despair in the neo world program was supposed to be a secret, right? to protect them?? am i wrong about that??

that flashback light only had me more confused

woah you can go outside and watch an action sequence of keebo fighting an exisal that's fucking sick

kokichi has the wax figure of rantaro?? just strung up by his bed?? what the????

oh THAT'S where the caged child document went!

so he really WAS the leader of the ultimate improv comedy group

i bet they do flash mobs

i think a more accurate title for him would be "ultimate little shit"

obsessed with the whiteboard in his room with all our pictures on it. he wrote who murdered whom, then wrote "suspicious" by maki, "weird" by keebo, "trustworthy?" by me, and "annoying" by the monokubs lol

REAL makoto naegi??? in the flashback flesh???

hell yeah we're FINALLY going to rantaro's lab!

...now that i'm in here i instantly regret it i don't like it in here

how did kokichi know about the vaults in rantaro's lab early enough to leave those notes? did HE even leave those notes? and WHY do the vaults have a monokuma USB in them?

is it gonna have that message from rantaro that we saw in a cutscene earlier?

ha i knew it

ultimate survivor? maybe himiko wasn't joking when she said maybe he went on a bunch of game shows lol. get this man to CBS

"i never imagined rantaro the first victim would come up again like this" i mean, *i* could! at least i was hoping. there were way too many unanswered questions about him

the voice of one of these unnamed classmates in this flashback sounds SUSPICIOUSLY like bryce papenbrook. i've learned never to take his presence lightly in these games

cold sleep room?!

aw hey the whole gang back together in the flashback! man it's been awhile since i've seen some of these people

i'm sorry, kaede has a TWIN??????

bro this game actually game overed me because i spent too much time clicking on people to talk to. I WAS TRYING TO BE THOROUGH IN MY INVESTIGATION!!!!!!! i didn't think it would do that to me, i just thought the time limit would be done once i'd completed everything. ffs

...motherkuma?

oh the mastermind just be making flashback lights to include whatever memories they choose? so yeah they all have to be COMPLETE crap

if himiko suddenly reappeared and is once again being super unhelpful about how she escaped the sealed hidden room, i'm guessing that means there's another door to that room

oh shit fam a hidden passage in the girl's bathroom? hm

hey they repaired keebo's ahoge! which was the key to his inner voice clearly

ha i knew those "small bugs" were actually cameras of a sort

"i'll hit them with my 'all your relationships will end up being love triangles' curse!" damn himiko that's cold. i feel like a remnant of despair would enjoy that tho

you know, if you'd asked me to predict who my final group would be, i NEVER would have guessed himiko and tsumugi. maki absolutely, keebo maybe, but never those two. this is such an odd grouping to be the final one

wait how the fuck do you know about jabberwock island, shuichi? or was that less secret than i thought?

i need to know more about this "previous game" rantaro survived

god how i fucking WISH rantaro was the ultimate game show host that would be so funny

your honor my girlfriend kaede was innocent!!!!!!!

are you telling me that the throwaway joke the game grumps made about the shot put ball landing right next to rantaro and not actually hitting him is what ACTUALLY happened???

i knew everyone kind of brushing off that tsumugi went to the bathroom back in chapter 1 was odd

we're doing a closing argument now? we haven't even hit intermission. i assume part 2 of this trial is just gonna be off the rails then

they're literally all begging tsumugi to tell them she's not the mastermind but she can't do it

dude if kokichi were here he would be tearing her apart verbally

junko the 53rd?! new ultimate despair?

is tsumugi just doing a REALLY effective cosplay rn?

they all keep trying to tell me that kokichi was a remnant of despair but i don't believe he was

don't tell me that makoto went back on his promise to have hope's peak be for normies

i like to believe that toko wrote this book

yeah i knew all those memories were fake as shit. we're in like a hunger games arena i'm calling it now

lol they weren't even hope's peak students? i'm willing to be they're not even ultimates at all, and not a single one of their backstories is real

i like to imagine everyone who's died so far is watching this from another room like everyone eliminated from a season of the bachelor or survivor watching the finale episode

the ONLY piece of evidence leading me to believe anything told to us might've been even remotely real is kaito's strange illness. other than that, i'm fairly certain every single thing told to us about the backstory and the outside world is fake. i bet there is no gofer project, there were no meteorites, there is no disease

what the- HAJIME?????

mahiru? okay this is starting to get a little batshit. felt some whiplash when she turned into hiro and then soda

hey don't you DARE turn into makoto naegi that feels disrespectful

bro does this take place in a different universe from the other two games???

this is getting way too meta

i have no idea where this goes from here if this isn't in the same universe as the other games

wait are we actually in a time loop of sorts, like i'd predicted awhile back?

oh dude i just noticed there are little "V"s and "3"s in the eyes when tsumugi is cosplaying

is this girl really blaming her actions on ~society~?

bro this is getting WAY too meta. like, past the point of being fun

shuichi just shouting at them to shut up is my mood rn

is this a roundabout way of saying they're all quote-unquote actors?

damn even that illness was fake huh

bro not her actually becoming soda to make the tenko comparison 😂

guys i'm not really sure what to make of this. idk where to go from here

like i genuinely feel like a bucket of cold water was just poured on me. like. what the fuck is this

guys i'm gonna be real: this fucking sucks. i've never been a fan of "it was a dream this whole time and none of it mattered or was real" storylines. it's lazy writing. and i really feel it here

bro i got the BAD END??

...or maybe not?

oh my god is keebo gonna be my actual savior??

i knew keebo was the only bitch around here i could trust

hang on am i playing as keebo now?? it's my dream. he had an ahoge for a reason! the TRUE true protagonist! this game is starting to redeem itself

lol of course that was an antenna. and he was basically the first person camera for the audience? interesting

you know this means in the final chapter the audience wasn't watching the rest of us running around finding clues for the situation, they were watching keebo fight exisals lol

ULTIMATE HOPE ROBOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

there's always an ultimate hope at the end of these. and it's very interesting that unlike the other games, they didn't have it be the character i was controlling for a majority of the game. and tbh i think that was the correct choice. shuichi you're great and your heart's in the right place but you're not the ultimate hope lol

oh this is now a battle to save keebo's life???????? oh i am putting my ALL into this

the fuck kind of rules are these? even if we win we gotta sacrifice two of us? huh?

speaking of, what happened to the 11 other people in this game? are they actually dead? or not? that feels very unclear now

i gotta fight shuichi in verbal sword battle? i gotta fight essentially myself?

i was never good at the sword minigames i could never figure out the best way to control it

oh man that poor boy is just so clinically depressed

and the fact that we had that sword fight to clair de lune...oh man

shuichi i am unsure about this logic of yours

oh am i shuichi again now?

yes shuichi we stan a weak king

tsumugi don't you dare talk as makoto you're making a mockery of everything he stood for

wait now i get to be himiko too? i better get a turn as maki by the end of this

oh thank god i do

thank goodness i didn't enable the "more time" skill

did they fry keebo?????????? unforgiveable unforgiveable UNFORGIVEABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh my god they took him over i hate this. let me go back to playing as keebo again

THEY ERASED HIS PERSONALITY??????? i'm never forgiving this game. this last chapter is like the finale of how i met your mother

at least he came back to say goodbye 😭

I CAN'T BELIEVE I GOT THIS FAR AND THEY FUCKING TOOK KEEBO FROM ME NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

can't believe i had to fight keebo and not tsumugi in the final battle

"we're friends, aren't we?" oh shut the fuck UP, tsumugi

no votes? thanks keebs

keebo fucking razing the place to the ground and executing everyone else in the process was NOT how i expected this game to end

oh shit they pulled a fast one on me with this epilogue - shuichi and maki and himiko lived?!? damn

they've made it unclear whether or not this is ACTUALLY in the same world as makoto and friends ughhh

i hate that they ripped keebo from me at the last second. they erased his personality and made him self-destruct. he was the hero but at what cost. this is a personal betrayal

could they rebuild him? maybe? all i want is a reunion with keebo and the survivors (VERY small survivor pool this time btw)

i'm going to be thinking about keebo nonstop for days fyi

guys, i gotta be real with you. this was the most unsatisfying horseshit. it felt like nothing mattered, and honestly it felt like they were making a mockery of us for enjoying the previous games and content. i didn't like it. and honestly it felt...lazy? like i had been speculating so much about how this would connect with the rest of the danganronpa plot and how this would build upon the already established story and characters. like you should've seen the theories i had in my head (one of my best ones: tsumugi was a rogue hope's peak student who idolized junko and wanted to do a killing game in her honor. keebo was a plant from makoto and the future foundation/academy to guide the others and eventually help lead to their rescue - that would've been a great plotline tbh). but no, none of that happened, it didn't build on the story, it didn't add to it, it wasn't part of the same story. it was just............nothing. it didn't lead anywhere, it didn't build up to anything. it just went nowhere and did nothing, it wasn't connected. it felt like all the investigating i did to find out the truth was a waste of time, and all the plot twists and turns that happened and all the choices the characters made had no fucking payoff. it was so frustrating. there are so many creative choices they could've made to build on the story in the danganronpa world but...that meta bullshit was not it.

in other news, i have already started writing a fanfiction: an alternate version of v3 that actually takes place in-universe, therefore making all the games connected! and i think what i've thought up is pretty good, ngl. it might be related to that theory i mentioned above. if you're interested in reading, lmk and i'll work to write it faster!

and thus officially concludes my v3 gameplay commentary! i might post here and there about my experiences in the bonus modes as i do them

[thanksjro]

More Than Meets the Eye #51 — Ten Has Done So Much for All of You, and for What? You Don't Deserve Him.

So, obviously, last issue ended rather poorly for Team Rodimus and Pals. It doesn’t look like the start of this one going much better, as a mass of baddies bombard the late Necrobot’s “Fortress”. Whirl, being Whirl, wants to go out and face his certain death head-on. Everyone else is more than fine to wait for death to come to them.

Rewind, showing off the skills he’s picked up as a videographer over the last several thousand years, gets the security cameras up. I’m assuming that Censere had these installed to keep an eye out for bored space teens who might have wanted to graffiti his millions of plinths. Too bad it didn’t save him, or his property, as outside, Tarn is shooting the ground with his twin fusion cannons. He’s having to hold his arm in place with his other hand, as I’m sure the kickback of firing two lasers at once must be something fierce. He finishes and commands his troops to cease firing, everyone withdrawing.

The Lost Lost Lighters are super jazzed about this, Brainstorm stating that they must have heard about Tailgate’s Power Punch, an attack with a name so banal, it surely must kill anyone who faces it, if only so they don’t talk shit about it after the fact.

Megatron, however, knows what Tarn’s pulling, as he’s a theatre kid, and everyone knows that the really intense theatre kids follow their scripts to a T, and will murder you for trying to ad lib like some filthy fucking improv performer.

By doing this, he’s honoring Shakespeare.

Swerve has begun to bawl like a baby over how bad the situation has gotten, likely recalling all the awful shit he witnessed the last time he crossed paths with the DJD. Magnus, who still has his arm off, because Velocity is all about uplifting her fellow women, demands that they try to call for assistance, then apologizes for swearing, even though he’s absolutely at the very least said “damn” in the past. Maybe he’s confusing the total inability to curse with the IDW publication law that you’re not allowed to say “bitch” until your series has been truncated by 50%. Or maybe he only allows himself to swear in the presence of poor snack management. Anyway, it’s not like it matters— Megatron’s just informed everyone that Tarn also likes to cut the phone lines in situations like this.

All of this, because you wanted middle management for your faction.

Because Megatron never baked any sort of loophole into the DJD’s way of handling shit, because how the fuck could he have possibly known he’d one day have to denounce his entire reason for existing to satisfy the commercial whims of Hasbro, the gang is going to have to figure out some way to defend themselves or escape in the next eight hours. Rodimus orders everyone to split up and look for clues, blowing off Ten in the process.

Velocity calls Swerve, the closest thing to a doctor besides her, to come look at the Necrobot’s corpse, which appears to have turned into a pile of ash. Swerve informs her that this is what happens when someone who’s old as balls kicks it. Now, it may concern you that Velocity, who was the only doctor for a ship of over 200 until this morning, doesn’t know what a dead old man looks like. However, we must recall that age-related spark burnout hasn’t been a thing until very recently for Cybertronians, and Caminus, the colony Velocity is from, is marginally younger as a society. It probably just hasn’t happened in her circles yet.

Velocity and Swerve play around in the pile of old man dust, until she pulls a key out, with “1/001” written on it. Her search party will be focusing on finding what this key goes to, as it was surely important, given that it was on Censere’s person at the time of his death.

Over on the DJD’s ship, The Peaceful Tyranny, Deathsaurus stares at the corpses Tarn’s nailed to the wall of his room. The nails have Decepticon insignias on the heads, because of course they do. These are the same corpses Tarn had on the wall of his office in Grindcore. Tarn asks if Deathsaurus is impressed with his first editions, and when Deathsaurus is understandably bewildered by this question, Tarn explains that these are corpses that were sent home after dying in the mines of Messatine, who had Megatron’s writing etched into their organs by Terminus, so that said writing would reach the outside world. Tarn thinks it’s pretty fucking cool, but Deathsaurus is, again, bewildered by this interior design choice. In general, Deathsaurus is bewildered by a vast majority of the ways Tarn chooses to live his life.

Tarn, opening the mouth section of his mask to drink a shot’s worth of energon, likely totally unable to see as he does so, since the eye holes don’t line up anymore, says that if Deathsaurus was a true intellectual like Tarn was, he’d understand that trying to chase down a ship with quantum jump capabilities is really difficult when you no longer have a sneaky little double agent to give you exact coordinates, so grounding their targets was the best option. No word on how Tarn feels about the ship he super-nightmare-death-murdered being perfectly fine now.

Deathsaurus really just wants to know why they backed off after having their targets cornered, because he hates Tarn and his stupid little games, having been working with him for at least a couple months by this point. Tarn, however, has the audacity to be smug about how all the Autobots are probably tearing each other apart out of fear, as the sun makes its way across the sky.

Back with Velocity’s search party, Nautica’s joined the one-and-a-half doctors in the Key Quest. Velocity asks Swerve about why Ten came down with the rest of the group, and in Swerve’s defense, it’s not like anyone knew this was a murder trip until after they’d arrived. When the brain attack happened last issue, Swerve hadn’t disclosed what exactly he’d heard— now, however, he admits that he’d gotten an earful from Ten about the Ambus Test, and how just because he’s made up of the corpses of multiple religious hermits doesn’t mean he isn’t a person too, and also once that union gets going, he’s gonna sic lawyer-mode Magnus on him.

Anyway, they found the door that key went to.

Back with Rodimus in the main room, he’s collecting the notes of all the other search teams. Rung’s face has been shaded to look like he got lip fillers. Rodimus isn’t pleased, but it isn’t because of Rung’s gotten work done.

Nightbeat, however, DOES have good news to pair off with the bad. News so good he starts using metaphors, which confuses and frightens Magnus. Nightbeat has found the quantum travel device the Necrobot used to travel to the deaths he recorded, and what do you know? It’s got just enough juice to get everyone out of dodge and into the loving embrace of safety. Hooray! Time to form an orderly queue, going from most to least obnoxious paint job.

Then Team Killjoy shows up, Velocity and Nautica letting everyone know what’s behind door #1: it’s a bunch of organics in stasis.

I will say, the inverse of Transformers fans collecting robot toys mint in package is decidedly more disturbing.

Whirl isn’t horribly keen to die over a bunch of squishy nobodies. Nautica states that the organics are vulnerable and need protection. Skids, really wanting to be in that straight-passing relationship, agrees that the DJD will totally kill these guys, because they learned their technoism from SOMEONE MEGATRON. Chromedome, who has had his husband back for maybe six months at this point, really doesn’t want to stick around for the sun to set. Cyclonus asks just why the fuck there’s a bunch of dudes in the basement. Tailgate wonders if it really matters, considering the situation at hand. Magnus, needing direction in his life, makes sure that Rodimus hasn’t decided to take a nap standing up like a horse. Brainstorm, who has been oh-so-subtly trying to edge the door to the quantum tube shut, makes the point that they could do a lot of good after the fact, if they left now and then vowed to protect a slew of organics afterwards, which would eventually even out their sins, probably.

Rodimus feels pretty good about this proposal, but he loves looking like the most appealing, middle-of-the-road choice, and says that they have some time to talk this out. However, we’ve forgotten that we’re riding with Mr. Ex-Peace Through Tyranny, who does nothing in half-measures and loves to be contrarian to Rodimus at every given opportunity.

This turn of events is such a shock to Rodimus, he shouts at Ten for trying to show him something. Poor Ten.

Rodimus reminds Megatron just what exactly they’re up against and what he’s signing himself up for and for what variety of living creature, but Megatron is aware of all of these things. Looks like the talking to Skids gave him on the duplicate Lost Light finally sank through his thick skull, and he’s ready to be a big boy about this whole Autobot thing. He then informs everyone that he’s not doing this to make a point, and that anyone who wants to dip is welcome to do so, as long as they’re doing it for themselves.

Of course, it’ll be a cold day in hell before any Autobot lets Megatron out-Autobot them, and it’ll be an even colder day before Cyclonus leaves his not-boyfriend alone on Murder Planet. Oh, and the fact that organic life is just as valuable as mechanical. Totally. Everyone defaults to stay, Rodimus closing the door to the quantum tube.

Swerve then offers a real heel-clicker of an alternate escape plan: what if… we just stole the DJD’s ship, stuffed it full of the organics, and flew away before anyone noticed? Now, this is, of course, an immaculate plan, which no man could ever find fault in, but Whirl is not a man, but rather a machine, and does question where exactly they’d be getting the keys to such a ship. Cyclonus is trying to be a bit more of a supportive friend to Swerve, since the last time the guy felt left out, they all had to project their consciousnesses 400 miles out and pay NYC rent, asks if there is more to this perfect, perfect plan, crafted in one of the finest minds of any generation.

There is not.

So, we’re gonna steal a ship.

Ravage offers to track the smell of unwashed bachelors and Megatron body pillows to see where the DJD parked. Rodimus gives him his blessing, marveling at the skillset at his disposal, as Magnus makes a fucking wild face of incredulousness and Ten sulks in the corner.

Before he runs off, Ravage brings Megatron a phone and asks that he talk to Tarn, because surely if anyone can get him off the warpath, it would be his old boss.

Back at the Peaceful Tyranny, Tarn, Deathsaurus, Nickel, Tesarus, and Vos are going over the plan for the day. Sure hope Deathsaurus can parse Primal Vernacular. Tesarus reminds Tarn of the time they went after Heretech and he turned a storm shield into a forcefield that held them off for days, but this band of Autobot nerds aren’t Heretech, now are they? Even if they do have an ex-Wrecker, a Skids, and the power of love on their side.

Then Tarn tells everyone to shut the fuck up, because he’s getting a call on his electric razor.

Back at the “Fortress”, Megatron stands astride the space scooter, looking horribly depressed, as he prepares to have a little chat with his most murderous fanboy. Rodimus questions this decision, having clocked that even on his best day, Megatron wouldn’t just whole-heartedly decide to effectively kill himself for the sake of 50-60 organics he doesn’t even know.

Of course, we’ve seen that at least one planet in the Magisterian system still has life, as the Scavengers had to use holomatter avatars at some point, as seen in issue #45. Perhaps if Megatron knew about this, he wouldn’t be so keen to go on a suicide mission.

Over with Ravage, he passes by Skids’s plinth, which I’m sure isn’t an omen of any kind, and discovers that the smell of B.O. and hot pockets he was following wasn’t attached to the Peaceful Tyranny, but rather a base the DJD and Deathsaurus’s boys threw together. Also, Ten’s been crawling after him in an attempt to keep hidden this whole time, over what was likely multiple miles. He didn’t do a good job in the slightest, but points for tenacity, buddy. Ravage understands that Ten’s just trying to help in some form or fashion, so Ravage gives him a special job: bullet sponge.

Deathsaurus’s men, Helex, Kaon, and the Pet all see Ten up on the hill. Kaon in particular looks very excited at the promise of a plaything, so much so that he lets his rabid little chihuahua off-leash.

Meanwhile, Megatron races across his personal field of spark flowers, on his way to rendezvous at his plinth with Tarn. I wonder who suggested this meeting spot? When Megatron arrives, he demands that Tarn at least face him with his, well, face, but Tarn says that his mask IS his face, even though we know it isn’t, because Tarn couldn’t commit to the bit hard enough on this particular front for some reason.

Megatron offers himself up for surrender. But enough about his crisis of morality, let’s get back to Ten.

Ten, former Legislator that he is, fights valiantly, throwing four guys in the air at once, even as the Pet scratches his collar bone and Helex punches him in the head, his face telling me that he’s gonna do horny mouth shit with Ten’s brain if he manages to get ahold of it. Kaon’s in the background, shooting electricity into the sky. I think he’s just happy to be here. This nonsense up on the hill allows Ravage to sneak over to the base to check for a ship that DOESN’T smell like wine, jockstraps, and viscera.

Back with the Autobots, someone finally remembers that Ten’s a person, and asks where the hell he’s gotten to. Magnus isn’t sure, though he knows where he HAD been. I expect better from you, Magnus. Ten is your little buddy! Your brother in artistic arms! He even left something for your enjoyment, while he went out to help Ravage!

After having solved the issue of their defense system, Ten went out and got his ass shredded for multiple pages, where he was repeatedly shot and set on fire and torn limb from limb and electrocuted (I guess someone finally pointed Kaon in the right direction). It seems like the end for Ten, but his assailants are suddenly shot and dealt with, blanketing the hill in silence.

Silent enough to hear the equivalent of twenty USD in Australian dollaridoos, having been converted into English pounds, rustling around in a British guy’s wallet.

[shorthaltsjester]

man. you know what i fucking think about all the time? vex and vax and the deities that they become champions to. how even those gods reflect the entanglement that is their life, how vax steps in front of a goddess on his stalwart hope in the world and demands she choose him and how vex is so tentative, barely speaks up because she’s fighting against every instinct she’s learned that tells her not to hope that she could be worthy enough, certainly not to a god.

and the gods that choose them, the gods they choose? they’re both reflections of one another to each other. vax, whose championship arose out of his commitment to never leave his sister’s side? his god is the matron of ravens, a sad woman who dons a mask. a mortal who fought tooth and nail to arrive at the power she has. vex, whose championship arrives after her brother’s hope in the future and her future specifically has rubbed off on her and encouraged her own growth to believing? she is greeted with pelor, who stands strong and painfully bright, but she’s granted the gift to see through it to warm eyes and a bright smile. who affirms the hope that lives in her.

and man, it’s even more extraordinary to me that the comparison between the given twin’s god and their sibling gets made by that sibling in scenes where they directly speak to the gods their twin has chosen. during vax’s resurrection ritual, vex bargains with the raven queen because she knows she’s someone who bargains like vex herself does, and she’s someone that values vax, maybe not quite as much as she does, but enough. and during vex’s trial, as the dawn father searches for his hope among the love for vex among vox machina, vax’s affirmation is that vex is his hope, so she should certainly be sufficient to be pelor’s.

and god the black death walker’s ward and the white dragon armour? vax’s wings and vex’s blessing? vax as a shroud of darkness visiting this plane, embracing the literally glowing shape of his sister on her wedding day? the poetry of vex and vax and pelor and the matron of ravens is enormous and so much of it is fucking. improv.

[ladykailitha]

Can Anybody See Me? Part 7

And here we get to my little headcanon about Gareth. I saw a gif of Nancy talking to a kid with a camera at the game in season 4 and thought it was Gareth. But Gareth is shorter with darker curls. So meet Gethin, Gareth’s taller fraternal twin.

On the tagging, I HAVE REACHED MY HARD AND FAST LIMIT OF 50. I love the response this story has gotten. I do. I love you all. I love every reply, like, and reblog. It brings me so much joy, you don’t even know. But tagging is hard for my ADHD brain. I have gone up from 20 to 30 and finally 50 as my system improved but I think if I do any more than that I’ll go insane. So any future tagging requests will be ignored. Sorry.

The best way to keep update on these stories is follow me and set me on notifications. I rarely do a lot of reblogging these days (too busy churning out stories like whoa), so more often then not a post will be a story. I try to post at least once a day (some times twice if I’m trying to rush through the posting a bit like I did to make sure the Valentine fic got out in time without making people wait on Vamp!Eddie), just never at set time.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

*

Steve was the last one to arrive.

Again.

But at least this time he wasn’t late. Just last. Fucking story of his life. Thankfully all four of them were waiting in the open garage. He could see Gareth’s drum kit in the corner, but none of the other guys brought their instruments.

“You found the place okay?” Jeff asked.

“Took a wrong turn somewhere, I guess,” Steve groused. “But I finally got back on track.”

“Come on in,” Gareth said. “My mom made homemade hot chocolate and sugar cookies.”

Steve lit up. “Sounds great.” He poured himself some hot chocolate and a couple of cookies, shoving one into his mouth immediately.

“So how we do this,” Jeff explained. “Everyone hands out their presents and then one person at a time opens all of theirs at once.”

“And since this is your first time,” Gareth said, “you’ll get to go first.”

Steve blushed. “Thanks guys.” He frowned suddenly realizing something. “Wait...how did you guys know what to get me?”

All four boys just grinned at him. “Well, that’s not creepy at all.”

“You’ll figure it out,” Eddie said, patting him on the shoulder.

Steve opened his gifts and since the point was to be outrageous, he laughed when he pulled out a pair of Speedo’s. “Do I even want to know which of you guys got this for me?”

Brian shook his head. “It’s better if you don’t know, man. Forbidden knowledge that.”

Steve nodded. The last thing was one of those auto-signature pictures of the 1984 Olympic gold medal swimming relay team. He looked up at Eddie, somehow knowing it was from him.

“Thanks, man. I love it.” At Gareth’s questioning look he explained. “I’m on the relay team at school. It was so fun watching this. They even had the Olympic trails right here in Indy.”

“Wow,” Jeff said. “That is cool.”

Eddie just cleared his throat and shove hair in front of his face to hide his embarrassment.

They went around the room, Gareth, Brian, Jeff and then finally Eddie.

Eddie got temporary tattoos.

“These ones are legal,” Brian teased.

A pack of guitar picks and a new DM screen. And then he got to Steve’s.

Steve squirmed in his seat, because he knew he had blown the limit. But when he saw it he knew he had to get it for the metalhead.

He opened it up to see a black leather wallet with a skull and a red lightning bolt behind it. It had a small metal ring for a chain to be clipped onto.

Eddie looked up at him with shiny eyes. “Steve...”

“I told you I was going to get you something nice for you and your uncle letting me come over and spend Christmas with you.”

“Steve wins,” Gareth said.

“Agreed,” Jeff and Brian said together.

Steve blushed. “I’m just glad everyone enjoyed their gifts.”

“You ready for some D&D?” Eddie asked trying to change the subject. Not just because he was uncomfortable, but because he had a feeling that Steve was too.

Steve nodded. “I got some pointers from Dustin and Lucas when I dropped them off. They also let me borrow some dice.”

“That’s some friends you got there, Steve-o,” Jeff said.

They led the way inside and Steve was sat between Eddie who was DMing and Gareth.

They had just gotten settled when another boy came out of the kitchen munching away on leftover ham. Steve had to blink. He looked over at Gareth and then back to the boy.

The Corroded Coffin boys grinned.

“Meet my fraternal twin, Gethin,” Gareth said, batting his eyelashes innocently.

Steve’s eyes went wide. “Holy shit, dude. I didn’t know you were a twin.”

Gethin rolled his eyes. “I’m the cooler old brother of the pair.”

“By two minutes,” Gareth said rolling his eyes.

Gethin’s eyes glittered with malice. “Still counts, nerd.”

“Go back to your camera, dweeb!”

Steve just shook his head.

“All right, let’s roll up these characters,” Eddie said rubbing his hands together and cackling gleefully.

It took a bit for Steve to get the hang of it, but he needed less and less help from Eddie or Gareth as the game went on.

They all died spectacularly.

“That was fun,” Steve said as they cleaned up.

“It’s not that bad with a campaign normally,” Brian said. “Unless specified to be a kill your darlings kind of game.”

“The point is to get your character to level twenty and beat the final boss, right?” Steve asked.

“That’s right,” Jeff said. “Sometimes we play with the club and sometimes it’s just us four having a blast. Our characters have been a party for about three years now.”

Steve let out a low whistle. “That is a long time.”

“We’ve got a paladin, that’s Jeff,” Eddie explained. “A wizard, that’s Gareth’s character. And Brian’s rogue.”

“And your druid, right?” Steve said snapping his fingers, remembering what Eddie said at the mall.

“That’s right, sweetheart.”

Steve grinned. “That’s so cool.”

“Hey, Steve,” Jeff asked. “Is okay if me and Brian get a ride home with you. Eddie lives on the other end of town and Gareth drove so...”

Steve shrugged. “Sure. Ready when you are.”

Jeff and Brian gave Eddie and Gareth hugs and then followed Steve out.

Once Steve had left Eddie turned to Gareth.

“So how did he do?”

Eddie wasn’t going to force his friends to like Steve. They didn’t have to. But he would like them to.

“He seems pretty chill,” Gareth said. “Gotta wonder if a couple of concussions changed his personality.”

Eddie nodded. This definitely wasn’t the Steve Harrington of last year. Or hell even of their experience with the guy as a whole.

“I don’t know,” he said. “I think maybe there were flashes before this.” He threw his arms in the air. “Because yeah, head injuries can cause personality changes, but I think at the fundamentals he’s still the same person he’s always been. Just now he can be himself instead of whatever Tommy H and Carol wanted him to be.”

“A funky little dork who is just trying his best?”

“Exactly,” Eddie said. “I just wonder what made him decide to give up all the popularity.”

Gareth nodded.

*

They hung out a few times with Steve and sometimes it was just Steve and Eddie.

Eddie could tell that there was something that was bothering him. Something that went deeper than feral dogs and beat downs by California transfer students.

But every time Eddie would get close, Steve would shut down. Once he got so upset he got up and left. Eddie was on the phone every day for three days trying to apologize. It took actually going to his house and threatening to beat the door down before he got through to Steve.

“Hey, don’t do that,” Eddie growled. “What if you had another concussion and no one was around to help you, dude. You could have died.”

Steve sighed. “Sorry. I can’t talk about it. Like literally, legally on pain of incarceration can’t talk about it.��

Eddie blinked. How the hell did a seventeen year old boy get mixed up in something that could get him arrested for talking about it?

“So write me a story or paint me a picture,” Eddie said. “Something, because it’s eating you alive. Is there someone you could talk to? An adult or something because fucking hell, Harrington you look like someone walked over your grave.”

Steve dug the meat of his palms into his eyes. “I know. There are a couple people I could talk to but they have so much to worry about.”

Eddie thought for a minute. “This is about Will and El isn’t it?”

Steve’s head whirled to face him, fear etched into every line of his face. “I don’t know what you mean...”

Bingo.

“A girl turns up out of no where and boy that was dead, suddenly isn’t?” Eddie said cocking his head. “Doesn’t take a genius to figure out the two are connected.”

Steve looked down at the floor. “Whatever you can imagine, just know it’s much, much worse.”

Eddie nodded. “So I’m guessing the adults are Mrs Byers and Chief Hopper?”

Steve nodded. “And the other people that know about it are all younger than me. So...”

“So tell me a story...” Eddie said. “Change the names, the details, but tell me a story. Or paint me a series of pictures. I’ve seen drawing pads all over your place, man. Just something, anything. Okay?”

Steve sighed. “Yeah, okay. I’ll try. Because you’re right. I need to release it somehow. Keeping it bottle up inside isn’t good.”

Eddie smiled. “There you go. Now go get dressed, we’re going to grab a bite to eat.”

Steve smiled softly. “Okay.”

*

After the first week of January Steve came up to him, eyes darting around him like he was nervous. So Eddie pulled him into the janitor’s closet.

“Hey, I need you take a deep breath for me,” Eddie said as Steve started to hyperventilate.

Steve struggled to obey.

“Hey, hey,” Eddie said, soothingly, rubbing his arms up and down. “Take a deep breath.” Steve managed that at least. “Good, now let it out slow.” The breath shuddered, but still it came out slow. “Now can you repeat that for me.”

“I’m in so much trouble, man,” Steve sobbed, sliding to the floor, his knees to his chest. “We have to do a comic in art class and so I thought I would do what you suggested. Make a comic out of the hell I went through. Only Miss Chen thinks that it’s too dark and wants to call my parents.”

Eddie’s eyes went wide. “Shit!” He began pacing back and forth. “Do you think your parents will come?”

Steve shrugged. “I don’t know. But I’m terrified that if they see it...”

“They’ll lock you up and throw away the key?” Eddie suggested.

He nodded.

Eddie took a deep breath. “Okay. Do you still want it or do you want it destroyed?”

Steve opened his mouth to answer, but frowned. He closed his mouth and really thought about it. “I’d like you to see it,” he said quietly.

“All right,” Eddie said. “I won’t go into details, because you need plausible deniability. But the first page of your comic isn’t going to be there tomorrow. And hopefully with it gone, Miss Chen won’t call your parents. Okay?”

Steve nodded.

Eddie opened the door to leave when Steve called out.

“Hey, Eds?”

“Yeah, Stevie?” Eddie asked, turning back to him.

“Thanks.”

Eddie smiled softly and then made his way out of the closet, giving Steve time to collect himself before he faced the hell of high school once again.

*

Eddie couldn’t be involved in the art theft either. It would be expected. So he enlisted Gethin’s help.

“And you’ll give Janice my number?” Gethin asked, eyeing him suspiciously.

Eddie threw his arms in the air. “For the last time, yes! Besides, she probably already has it as you know, your TWIN is in the same club as she is?”

“What do you get out of this?” Gethin asked.

“I’m the one that suggested it in the first place,” Eddie admitted, putting his hands on his lower back. “So it’s my job to get him out of the trouble I put him in.”

Gethin rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “Steve’s going through some pretty heavy shit, huh?”

Eddie licked his lips. “Yeah, man. I thought he could get it out safely through his art, but even though Jeff and I have turned in far worse stuff...”

“Because it’s coming from Steve, obviously he’s acting out,” Gethin supplied.

“Pretty much the whole thing in a nutshell,” Eddie said.

Gethin nodded.

“So you’ll do it?” Eddie asked.

“Yeah, I’ll do it,” he said.

Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13  Part 14  Part 15  Part 16  Part 17 Part 18  Part 19  Part 20  Part 21

Tag list: @shrimply-a-menace @strangersteddierthings @throwbackthrowaway @novelnovella @cursedfoxteeth @babyblender @lifeisnotsobadonceyoustopcaring @swimmingbirdrunningrock @steve-the-hairrington @winterbuckwild @spectrum-spectre @matchingbatbites @garden-of-gay @anaibis @thing-a-ling @fandemonium-takes-its-toll @artiststarme @sundead  @nelotegreitic @gregre369 @butterflysandpeppermint @thedragonsaunt @kodaik97 @messrs-weasley @scarletzgo @deadlydodos @renaissan-vvitch @evix-syne666 @emly03 @justforthedead89 @ashwinmeird @huniibee @phantypurple @stevesbipanic @shucks-yuckyuck @awkwardgravity1 @bookbinderbitch @reportinglivefromsoda @chasinggeese @be-the-spark-bitch @jinxjinn @kohlraedirectioner @cr0w-culture @xjessicafaithx @whimsicalwitchm @jaywhohasthegay @dangdirtydemons @lovelyscot  @howincrediblysapphicofyou @the-redthread

[vole-mon-amour]

Halsin becoming a companion after EA because people were so thirsty for him?? The bear sex scene at the presentation going viral and probably boosting sales???? Now he’s the most hated guy????? Make it make sense.

It's actually incredibly sad because many people either forget he's at the camp ('too boring, too dull' & i've seen takes on YT community pages like "I forget he's even at the camp". Halsin also leads there as the least likeable companion) or treat him like a joke. Oh but bear scene, haha, so funny.

Man. I agree that they completely rushed his romance and development, they weren't ready for people wanting him to be a companion so badly, and they're not making it easy to know more of his backstory and trauma (how the hell do we learn about his sex slavery by a couple of drow ONLY if we take him with us when romancing Astarion and fucking drow twins? Why is Astarion's trauma out in the open, but with Halsin we need to dig so so deeply?)

At the same time, I don't think people are willing to learn things about him and his struggles? Bear (that he has trouble containing, mind you), big, muscular, dumb and boring. Never take him with them anywhere. Never listen to his opinions. Consider his wisdom and experience as something to disregard completely.

I do think the bear sex scene boosted the sales (i'm one of those people, hi), but his personality either felt flat for those people (???? he's AMAZING. he's open-minded. he's so experienced and non-judgy.) or it was a joke from the beginning as well.

Idk. I'm honestly so tired and upset about this. I wish Larian did a much better job at making him a companion, telling his story and backstory, and at interacting with him and letting him expressing himself and his opinions. It always makes me think back to his pipe and the journal, but how we can never gift him anything, ask about his pipe (or ask about all sorts of things for that matter). Let me truly BE with him, Larian. Let me play AS him since his choices and personality so close to Tav's. (Let me romance him as Astarion, just like it was presented at the con, and have their romance be FULL with unique dialogues and interactions.)

Lastly, I wish more people send feedback on this to Larian. Maybe then something would change for the better.

P.S.: I have a doc where I write more on that & describe more problems and how Larian could improve that. I *think* I sent it to them, but I got no reply whatsoever (when I did the same for Astarion, I did), so I'm not sure. If you'd like to read that, hit me up with your email (my messages are open) & I'll add you to that doc.

[dimension20npcofalltime]

Round Four (Semi-Final) - Bracket One [Dimension 20 NPC of All Time Sidequest Edition]

Lukas vs Doug Meat

Propaganda under the cut (May contain Major spoilers for Burrow's End and Never Stop Blowing Up)

Lukas - He/Him

Campaign: Burrow's End

Who is he?

Lukas is a child stoat that is being educated in The Last Bastion of the Light's daycare.

Why is he the NPC of All Time?

A perfect little boy without whom the campaign would have been very different. Started off as comedic relief and added depth to Lila and Jaysohn, but ended up creating an incredibly emotional moment in the final battle of the campaign. Also, I love Aabria's voice for him and he deserves the world.

Showed up, followed the party immediately with no questions, had a funny voice, got addicted to mint, completely useless. THE MOST NPC ENERGY of all time

He brings so much fun to the twins’ side of the story. it’s clear that aabria just like, forgot that they’d cleared his nose with the mint when she started him with the stuffy voice again, and then everyone just went with it.

Doug Meat - He/Him

Campaign: Never Stop Blowing Up

Who is he?

Doug Meatskin(previously Doug Meat) is one of Kingskin's goons.

Why is he the NPC of All Time?

I’m sure he’s been submitted already but seriously he is the best character. he is the mvp he is the goat he is the second president of the usa in the eighties like how there was two popes one time.

The "party adopts a random background mook so they're a character now" of all time

He loves his mob boss boss. He's co president of these unites states of America. La familia.

That's my fucking president right there <3

It's GOTTA be Doug. The loyalty, the emotion, the love for the people he trusts. And his name is DOUG MEAT

He’s buff, he’s emotional, he has unknown depth and vague feelings for his drug lord boss.

DOUG MEAT!! he is a lover he is a fighter he has ideas for how to improve a criminal gang!! most loveable NPC of NSBU he is gorgeous and wonderful!! he just wants to hold someone's hand :((

It's Doug Meat, man

DOUG MEATTTTTTTTTTTTT

He stapled a mask to his face just to remove it within five minutes of talking

I just love him so much <3 (you do not have to use this I just don’t really know what to say sorry)