#the only kind of oysters
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Nice apron, Shadow
It's not quite cold here yet (it's actually hot and sunny where I live right now), but I'll definitely make cream of mushroom soup once it is. I use this recipe, for anyone interested (though I make some substitutions for various reasons.)
Can you tell I love making fun of Black Doom?
#mmmm I love mushrooms even though I've only had three kinds#cremini pink oyster and lion's mane#my god the last two I mentioned taste sooooo good when you cook them in butter with some garlic and onion#shadow the hedgehog#black doom#shadow#cream of mushroom soup#sonic the hedgehog#weirdofish
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YAAAAY I AM SITTING ON A PATIO OUTSIDE ENJOYING THE BEAUTIFUL WEATHER & I AM BEING BROUGHT A BEAUTIFUL COCKTAIL
#YAAAAAY HOORAAAAAY life is worth living#i ordered a fall sangria. as i am wont to do#it’s kind of windy rn so TODAY of course i am the only fucking person outside. why couldn’t this happen on the dollar oysters day#god i love sitting outside. wish i lived in a place where you could sit outside more of the year#hey but good news. that time is coming soon. 🥴#chatpost
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Why is there not an option for ONLY raw oysters why tf would you cook that shit and make it nasty???
Ok since I’ve heard lots of feedback on this I need to know where the rest of you stand
#oysters#so good#assuming they're fresh of course#any old meat is not a good thing#Jadedbirch and I just made plans to face fuck some raw oysters tomorrow#to make up for this travesty#raw oysters#the only kind of oysters
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sorry i cant come to the party. yeah im gonna be thinking about jang uk and mu-deok’s jade eggs. yeah its gonna be an all day thing. yeah im also gonna be thinking about the parallel between seo yul disguising his visits to naksu as visiting his pet bird and mu-deok referring to herself as an egg in a nest to jang uk. yeah its gonna make me lay face down on the ground and not move for twelve hours. yeah. yeah. thanks
#i cannot for the life of me articulate anything coherent about naksu being a bird to seo yul and mu-depk being an egg to jang uk#its there. its somewhere.#something about like#as naksu (bird) she was free and alive in a way she isnt as mu-deok. smth abt how as mu-deok (egg) she can only rely on jang uk#smth also about as naksu she was a fixed thing already grown into what she was meant to be#and as mu-deok she has the potential to be anything. its about. the starting over. the new kind of freedom#do you understand do you see the vision#look toward the horizon and see it with me or least pretend you do because im slowly turning into an oyster animorphs style as we speak#alchemy of souls#jellyfish txt
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Yeah I won't lie this game is gonna have to win me back somewhat
#WHERE IS SAW.#Ftr im talking 99% about the narrative the actual gameplay is good. Just a smoother natural progression of fallen order's mechanics#None of the new shit is intrusive and combat still feels good when you're. well. good at it#My only complaint there was just the force power I mentioned and well. I guess also because you start out with all the#traversal methods Cal already had by the end of the last game it does feel like they didn't really know what else to add#so all the new things you learn as you progress are kind of lame or at least not especially gamechanging#and I do enjoy the mind trick but the lack of new force abilities in general kind of sucks.#But then again Im just coming from kotor where the world is your oyster in terms of force abilities so maybe im spoiled.#sw
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Erm !! Lil rant in da tags bc !! Erm !!
#idk but i feel like im going in the right direction for once#i feel like i struggled for so long with so many things#and a lot of it was me but i feel like this year rlly gave me space to grow#and i have grown. i think i get to say that#im not longer lonely and sad and angry all the time. like if you compared me to who i was four years ago you would be shocked#im a lot more confident. i feel comfortable accepting ppls friendship and whatever that entails. i dont get upset as easily#i mean even just comparing me to my senior yr of highschool. or even last year#and i think a large part of that is that things dont feel so one-sided anymore. like its not just me anymore#im not the only one helping out at home anymore so i can finally focus on myself#and ive made so many great friends that have opened me up like some kind of oyster#like the amount of times ive been called an extrovert is crazy bc i have NEVER been called that before#and i rlly think its thanks to all these wonderful people who have given me a chance and a space to be unapologetically me#even if its weird or freaky or sometimes a little off#i spent a long time inside myself bc i was scared but as time goes on i feel that fear less and less#im just really glad. im like genuinely happy#n especially when i look back on my old posts where i was in so much pain im just glad we were able to get to this point#im just surrounded by immensely cool people. my partner. my friends. my professors. my doctors.#like i was making progress before but i feel like ive been able to truly start healing this year#i love you all. you know who you are. erm!! if you see this post n then see me i will pretend i never made it !!! so erm!!!#king magnum thirst trap WHEN#rambles#sowwy for the lore dump do you still think my cock is huge
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Truly, one of the greatest love language is someone agreeing to eat something atrocious for your benefit.
My first experience with this was in college. My friend Charlie invited me to a jazz club. One would think he’d learned his lesson. I thought nothing of this and agreed to a fun night with a guy friend. We arrived and I saw nothing romantic in the outing.
The menu at the club was very traditional date food- steak, oysters, romancey food. But still, I didn’t catch on. This food didn’t sound like what I wanted. In fact, what I wanted was a hummus plate. Charlie took this turn of events with a slight wince but ordered one for us.
The hummus plate arrived. Sitting politely on the corner of the garlic bomb was a spicy pepper. Laughing, I teasingly dared Charlie to eat it. You see, this kind of rough humor was common among buddies. I thought we were in Buddy Rules. But Charlie was operating under Date Rules; eating the pepper would be a romantic test of his bravery.
He bit the pepper.
His skin was almost as pale as mine and he went bright red instantly, tears stood in his eyes as sweat broke out across his whole body in protest. He barely managed to swallow as he began coughing, his body reflexively trying to spew forth the poison in his mouth.
I was doubled over with laughter and didn’t feel bad until a few days later when Brendan informed me it had been a date. I scoffed initially and only slowly realized Charlie had been intending it as a date. I repented the pepper and promptly dated Brendan in self defense.
Charlies act of romantic heroism went unappreciated but the spirit was there.
Many years later when I’d given up on boys I was dating my beloved wife. Together we took a trip to Taiwan. One of the wonderful things about new places is the food. I still dream about the food in Taiwan. Even the humblest train station cream puff was several orders of magnitude better than any I’ve ever had in the states.
But one place we went was like. Italian food as interpreted by Taiwanese cooks. Some of the combos were as bizarre to me as many Italians probably feel American Italian food is. Specifics escape me, but it felt like I was dreaming some of the menu at the time. At the end we decided to get a chocolate fondue, because why not. We were on vacation.
The liquid chocolate was served with all the things one would normally expect, strawberries, sweets, the usual chocolate accompaniments. And then we saw the tomatoes. Tomatoes and chocolate. We all stared at the tomatoes in horrified fascination.
Now, I hate tomatoes. I can stand a tomato sauce but raw tomatoes and I have nothing to talk about. So I knew that if I tried it I’d find it as repugnant as I’ve always found tomatoes. But I was haunted by the idea that someone who actually liked tomatoes would like tomatoes in chocolate.
My beloved loves tomatoes. And chocolate. I turned the biggest puppy dog eyes on them and begged to know if the combination was actually somehow delicious. My wife insisted that it would be heinous. Still, they speared a tomato sacrifice and coated it in chocolate, for me. For me, they ate it.
It was so wretched that their face collapsed into instant regret. But they didn’t spit it out. They knew I got sick if people spit out half chewed food. So they soldiered on and swallowed the cursed chocolate fruit.
Their devotion utterly delighted me, and even years later I adore that they suffered that tomato to reassure me that indeed, it was bad.
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Channelled message: The moment they fall in love with you
(lover/partner/future spouse)
This is a general reading meant for multiple people. Take only what resonates and leave out the rest.
Your feedback is much appreciated. If you find the reading resonated with you, leave a comment, I’d love to know 🎐
About me | Masterpost
Book a reading with me - KO-FI (Read this post : personal reading)
1. Carnelian
I have to admit that I look like a human being but sometimes I feel like an oyster. I wish I could have their shell, hiding myself behind a sturdy, protective barrier that no one can touch me. I would feel invincible in my weakness, in the darkness that my shell provided, taking a peek only now and then. You must be getting tired of this hide and seek game that I subjected you to, to be an unwilling gamer.
But even then, you excelled at that game, just like in everything you do. How did you beat the game? You ignored the rules, of course. You didn't let me hide, and what is there to be sought if there was no hiding.
You were a magician, transformed the most dire thing into the most hopeful thing. A magician with an X-ray machine, you peered into my inner most thoughts and feelings without opening my shell.
I felt scared and rage at first, who are you to dare to do that to me? I flipped out, of course, natural reaction of someone who had been in hiding for who knows how long. I got angry, I shouted, I cried, I held my breath, and I looked at you, begging you to stop seeing me, knowing me, accepting me. I must look like a clown to you back then.
But you just smiled. A triumphant smile, the smile that someone has after searching for something for so long and finally found it. I could feel you saying this to me: "I'm not an oyster and I'm not the kind to fall in love with an oyster, stop role-playing and sit with me side by side."
And that was how I turned into a proper human and learnt to love properly. Before, it felt like I was a story teller, someone looking from afar, at a safe distance, through the telescope, peered into life. I saw myself being with you, but I didn't really know the me who was being with you, how did they feel. And you reached out your hand, pulled the telescope aside, let me become the one that I had been watching all along and let me feel what they had felt.
I want to confess, sometimes I couldn't shake this dissociated feeling about everything. Sometimes, it feels like I was dangling between two worlds. But I have something new with me, a hope, a faith, that you would be there for me at that time, pull me back to you or accompany me in whatever that world I'm in.
Note: The moment your person falls in love with you would be when they feel seen by you, for all their light and darkness, the beautiful and the ugly parts of them. They're scared of this feeling, it makes them vulnerable. You unmask them, make them come out of their shell and be their real self, no more hiding. The way you do it is gentle and considerate, but the feeling they have will be devastating. They probably are someone who is more detached and isn't too involved with everything for fear of getting hurt. But after falling in love with you, even though the feeling of detachment about the world sometimes still lingers but they will also have the faith that there's someone who can see and understand them, who they can just be and come closer.
2. Aventurine
Sometimes, I feel like a bottle floating in this vast ocean of life. People around me, they seem to float right past me. If I could find a companion, then they would just stay for a fleeting moment and then ready to move on, leaving me behind to swim alone again. It never occurred to me that I might have looked at the wrong place.
Call me childish or sentimental, but whenever I looked at you, I felt like Ariel, the little mermaid, hiding behind the rocks to sneak a glance at the prince. You seemed so sure, so fine, so stable, so fixed, so opposite of me.
While I needed to hold on to something to keep me in one place and safe, you were just there, magnificent like the sun, without a care of the world. My soul was transfixed.
Many came to me with their offers, but their light paled in comparison to you, the true light. They were like the moon while you were the sun, and even though I'm a coward, I still dare to be ambitious and aim for the sun. It's like a moth to a flame.
Your smiles were and still are the warmest. They made the cold creature in me surrender and crawled out of the dark to actually stand in the light before you. Was it a kind of reverence? I dare not to use such a heavy word. And I dared not to impose my heavy feelings on you.
The moment I saw your light, I had already become speechless. I wanted to tell you many things, the good, the bad, the silly but I couldn't find the words. And that was fine, really. I found love in the silence of our existence together.
You taught me that life was not just about constantly swimming and floating but it can also be about being still and taking in all the things around us, and taking out all the things inside us. To lay them out on a table and let the other pick what they like, making a trade. You keep something of mine, and I keep something of yours.
Note: Before meeting you, falling in love with you, this person just floated through life with several superficial connections that, at the end of the day, made them feel even more lonely than before. There is a feeling of being lost in the dark, forever grasping for something. Then the moment they see you, your composure, your stillness and your stability will draw them in, probably a moment where you will display a sense of responsibility and confidence, being there for them, being their rock. They will feel a sense of finally being able to rest, to stand still and enjoy life.
Their temperament and yours are probably opposite of each other. Opposite attracts.
The moment they fall in love will also be the moment they put you on a pedestal, a fixed place for them to look up to. And at the same time, they will want to fuse with you, to possess some of your traits while you are taking in their influences. The feeling, the desire for belonging will be the spark that ignite their love for you.
3. Agate
You want me to tell you the moment that I fell in love with you? Can I be greedy and tell you many moments instead?
I don't have a love switch in me that can switch on and off suddenly. The concept of love at first sight perplexed me.
To me, loving you feels like the spread of the ink, the water that flows slowly, the trail that we keep walking on. I felt like a piece of paper with a corner touched by the tip of your pen absentmindedly. The ink just spread slowly, but everywhere, until the piece of paper turned completely into your colour. A natural progression, the inevitable.
We debated, we laughed, we played, we dreamed, we ran, we feared. All of those moments, together, made the ink soaked deeper and deeper still, forming indelible marks on me.
I had put a lot of thoughts into this subject, believe me, about why did I fall in love with you and I had no answer, to this day still don't. I'm afraid, actually, to find the answer. What if the moment I put a definition to it, the moment the answer materialise in my head, it becomes a checklist? If the things in that checklist become untrue, will I just fall out of love with you? I'm scared of my mind sometimes, it kills the magic. Yes, I believe in magic. Even if I know that the magic trick in the show is all about the sleight of hand, but in some corners of my heart, I still believe in the real magic of the act. A part of me refuses to see the logic, the reality. Let me dream a little and don't ask me to define the indefinable, that is our love. Let things stay inexplicable sometimes.
Note: This person refused to define any moment as the moment they fell in love with you. It's a gradual progress for them. Everything you guys did together is another drop of ink (their word) making the love deeper.
They couldn't tell the beginning of it, and they are afraid of thinking about it, actually. It makes them dread the possible ending.
To this person, love is a journey, stretched through the span of their life, there is no start point nor an end point. They are highly rational and in their head a lot. Notice that they used the word "think" and "head". But they are aware that a part of them, their heart, yearn for something magical, the inexplicable and they want their love to be that way, to escape the scrutiny of their head, to leave out the logic.
4. Citrine
I had a belief that life is supposed to be an endless journey. We constantly have to keep moving, never stop. Whatever we are doing, whoever we are meeting, one day, they will all go away, leaving us, alone, on our journey. And I had been living with that belief for a very long time. Until you.
Being with you made me question if it was really necessary to be always on the move, to be alone on my journey. Yes, it's necessary to be always on the move, but it's not necessary to be alone. Just like a ship, they stop, the passengers step out, new passengers step in, and the ship goes on. But the captain and the crews won't change, they are together with the ship. And I wanted you to be the captain of my ship.
Changes are good, but having someone going along with you through all of those changes is even better, or best. I moved a lot, I travelled a lot, constantly seeking, constantly reaching. It wore my soul down. Some days, I just arrived home then threw myself on the bed, exhausted, trying to sleep to save the energy for the next day. It went on and on, the motion. I had all these experiences, all these wonderful stories along my travels that I didn't know whom to share with. I didn't have someone to hold me when I felt shaken, to whisper that everything would be okay. Until you.
Maybe the path I need to travel wasn't just to some faraway places but also to you all along. For the first time, I wanted to hang on dearly to something, someone, to you and to our relationship. To have a real home, to see myself so connected to you that the thought of leaving would be immediately banished out of my mind, to imagine myself being a parent to our children. I contemplated all of these and I saw all of these in my mind, clear as day.
Note: Before being in a relationship with you, this person had been travelling alone, constantly on the move, never had concrete, long-lasting connections with anyone. Could be due to their job and environment that they had to move a lot. It made them exhausted and didn't have enough energy for anything else.
But by meeting you, being in a relationship with you, their belief has changed. They want a companion, someone whom they can commit to and build a stable life with. Even with all the travelling, they can still feel the sense of being anchored. That's when this person falls in love with you. Now they have someone whom they can offer their love, their stories to, whom they can imagine a future home life with, who can hold them close without holding them down.
5. Labradorite
I have always yearned to be a part of a romantic fairy tale since I was a kid. Keep this a secret for me, okay? I dream of the two characters meeting at the most fateful moment, going through many hardships, longing for each other, and finally, at the end of the tale, pulling each other into an eternal kiss. And guess what, I actually have that with you! Minus the ending part and eternal kiss, we don't end, and an eternal kiss will make us out of breath. But you get the gist of it.
The first time you had to go away, I thought I would be fine, it's not like you went away forever, it was just a trip. And then, with each day, I found myself growing more restless. Constantly asking in my head, "Hey, where are you now? What are you doing?" Talking with you through the phone wasn't enough, I wished we had a telepathic line constantly connected to each other. Oh wait, maybe we do, I even saw you in my dreams.
And then you came back. That moment when I saw you, I felt something bursting inside me, like a balloon kept getting bigger and bigger inside me, pressed and stretched my outside taut. It hit me like lightning, I was a tree rooted in one place and lightning just strike down. I burst open and revealed my thumping heart inside. Was I overreacting?
I wished the place that you and I met on that day were our home so that I could play the longing character and finally welcome their lover home. Your familiar face is the face I want to see whenever I open the door. Your laughter is the one I want to hear whenever I say something funny (in my mind) or ridiculous. And your embrace is the one I want to be in whenever I realise I have someone by my side.
Note: This person might develops feeling for you for a long time but won't realise it themselves. Until you have to go away someday, it won't be a true separation. Might just be a business trip or some long vacation.
Your absence will make them feel a longing for you that they can't really explain because the situation won't be dire and serious, just a normal, temporary separation.
When they finally get to see you, all those longing feelings will come bursting out, and that's when they will realise they love you. You guys will actually do many things that they fantasise about when they were a kid. It will feel like a truly magical thing for them.
6. Amethyst
Ah yes, we can always tell our children and our grandchildren how we felt in love at a party, making them jealous of our boldness. Now I'm getting ahead of myself.
What better way to celebrate than to have someone with you to share the joy with. You're always like that to me. Whatever joy I have, whatever joy you have, we've never failed to share it with each other. And I'm honoured.
My wish had finally come true. I have achieved many of my ambitions. I can confidently say that I had been working hard and I earned it.
And that's when I saw you. I can also confidently say that you looked stunning at that party. You looked happy and I could feel that somehow our happiness was on a similar wavelength.
I have to admit, the afterglow feeling of my success made me a lot more bold and optimistic than normal. If it was the past me, I would probably have swept the attraction under many layers of insecurities and nervousness. Trying to convince myself that it was just a delusion.
But here I was. I dared to look for love. I mean, I had achieved success in different areas, there's no way I couldn't be successful in love, right? Logical, you can't argue with that (of course you will)
Deep inside me, I probably had felt that love would be the biggest achievement I could get. And I was willing to set out again, to put my effort into achieving that dream, with you.
Note: This group is strangely short. This is a person that hides a lot of their thought to themselves and they find expressing what they feel through words is difficult. They are more actions oriented. Prefer to set out milestones and goals to achieve. They consider everything good in their life is their achievement.
You guys probably meet at a celebration party, maybe you won't be there to attend the party but just coincidentally in the same space, maybe a restaurant, an open space.
They will have achieved some big milestones that make them proud and more confident, they put in their effort and now they can reap the reward.
The feeling of joy will be heightened. And amidst that celebration, they will see you and fall in love, very likely a love at first sight situation. And they will believe that they can achieve happiness with you.
#pick a card#tarot#tarotblr#witchblr#channeled message#lithomancy#pick a pile#crystals#divination#tarot community#tarot reading#witch community#future spouse#astro community#astrology
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how about Octavinelle students with a half shark!reader headcanons who is just intimidating but nice towards them , looks like they have insane bloodlust but they're really nice , they don't talk to anyone but them cuz they're scared of accidentally hurt them (cuz when they accidentally feel someone else's blood they're mouth breaks into massive fangs)
If thus is too hard , ignore it , goodluck on your studies
Octavinelle with a Shark! Reader (HCs)
hi, i loved the ask its so cute <3
Azul Ashengrotto
Azul first meets you with his usual shark-like grin—until he sees the sheer predator energy radiating off you. He freezes mid-sentence, giving you the most awkward, watery smile. The only thing running through his mind is "I might have miscalculated."
But then you flash him the smallest, softest smile. The disconnect between your terrifying aura and kindness breaks him completely. He's staring, struggling between his business instincts and his desire not to get eaten.
“You’re quite… unique,” he says, trying not to sound nervous. “Thanks. You, too.” Azul.exe has crashed.
He soon realizes you’re not out to maul him, which makes him infinitely curious. He tries to study you, politely of course—like he’s about to offer a very lucrative loan agreement.
When he notices you only speak to him and the Tweels, he secretly feels way too smug about it. If anyone else tries to talk to you, you just give them this blank, shark-eyed stare until they flee in terror.
Azul loves it. He may be business-minded, but your intimidating presence is great for his stress levels. No more annoyances!
However, the day you accidentally get blood on your hands while eating, you smile—full shark fangs, gleaming and sharp—and he almost faints. He looks at your monstrous grin and says, voice cracking, “I-It’s… uh… a lovely smile, truly...”
You’re so worried about scaring him off, but Azul low-key thinks it’s kind of awesome. You become his VIP intimidation service—though he swears he only uses your friendship “for mutual benefit.” (Sure, Azul.)
Jade Leech
The first time Jade meets you, he knows something is off. Your posture is way too relaxed for someone exuding that much bloodlust. It intrigues him immediately. You smell like danger, but you talk like a librarian.
Jade is completely unbothered by your scary vibes. In fact, he leans in closer whenever you give off that silent, intimidating energy, like he’s trying to encourage it.
“You’re quite the curious one, aren’t you?” he says, tilting his head with a sly smile. You just blink, utterly confused by his calmness.
When he realizes you only talk to him, Floyd, and Azul, his interest skyrockets. It’s not every day someone ignores the rest of NRC while picking him as their favorite conversation partner. He takes it as a compliment, in his strange Jade way.
One day, you accidentally get a whiff of someone’s blood. You’re trying so hard to hold back, but your mouth stretches into a horrifying grin—rows of massive, sharp fangs on full display. Jade just stares in pure, gleeful fascination.
“Incredible,” he murmurs. “I didn’t know you were capable of such expressions. Show me again sometime.”
You panic. “Jade, I don’t think that’s a good idea…”
“Hmm. I disagree.”
He is not even remotely afraid of you. In fact, he makes it worse by offering you little challenges—like opening oysters with your teeth or biting things just to see your fangs pop out. He probably offers his hand as a joke to see what you’ll do.
“Would you like to try it?” he says, stretching out a finger. You choke on air. “Jade, I’m not biting you.”
He just smiles, not withdrawing his hand. “How tragic.”
Floyd Leech
Floyd immediately latches onto you the moment you meet.
“Whoa! You’re like a shark! A big scary one!” he says with a grin, not remotely intimidated. In fact, he gets right in your personal space, poking at your cheek like he’s sizing you up for a fight.
When you don’t react aggressively, just awkwardly shuffle back, he finds it hilarious. You’re big, you look like you could eat people whole, but you’re nervous around others? It makes you even more interesting to him.
Floyd becomes obsessed with you. He’s glued to your side, acting like you’re his personal shark pet. He drapes himself all over you, throws an arm around your shoulders, and teases you relentlessly.
“C’mon, show me the teeth! I know you’ve got those big chompers in there.”
One day, you accidentally taste blood after someone near you scrapes their hand. Your fangs break out in full force, and you’re grinning like a nightmare creature. Floyd stares for a beat—and then bursts into laughter.
“There it is! Ahahaha! I knew you had those! Do it again!” he yells
“I-I can’t just do it, Floyd—”
“Why not? C’mon, chomp! Chomp!!”
He’s utterly unhinged about it. Floyd starts trying to coax out your fangs like a maniac, probably waving his hand around, daring you to bite him just to see if he can provoke you.
“Bite me, bite me, bite me!” “Floyd, no!” “Floyd, yes!!”
Despite his chaos, he’s weirdly protective of you. If anyone so much as looks at you wrong, he switches moods instantly—grinning one second, deathly serious the next.
“Hey. Don’t bother my sharkie, or I’ll bite you.”
In the end, Floyd loves every part of you, terrifying fangs and all. If anything, he thinks you’re the coolest friend ever, and he never misses an opportunity to drag you into trouble—because, hey, what’s better than two scary creatures teaming up to terrorize people?
Masterlist
#twst x reader#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland x reader#twst#azul x reader#azul ashengrotto x reader#azul#azul ashengrotto#jade leech x reader#jade x reader#jade leech#jade#floyd leech x reader#floyd x reader#floyd#floyd leech#Octavinelle x reader
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moments in twilight
synopsis: oh, innocent child of blood and bones. you cry as if your heart bleeds fire. has nobody ever taught you to burn them all first? w.c: 13k.
pairing: heianera!ryomen sukuna x f!reader
warnings: childhood friends to lovers, major character death. mentions of cannibalism, violence, and slight gore. ANGST! sfw, but mdni!
a/n: this was requested by this enthusiastic nonie! i hope you enjoy this and that it’s everything you wanted <3 a massive shout to @spookuna for being my biggest supporter and cheerleader, because i genuinely couldn’t have done this without her!
divider / art / ao3 / @ficsforgaza
the first sight of her fate didn’t seem real, like something out of a dream.
she couldn’t understand what – or who – she was looking at.
perhaps it was a fully materialized specter born somewhere from the deepest recesses of her imagination, unknown even to herself. it certainly seemed that way to her; she was only six and knew nothing of the horrors of the world, except for those that came to life in scary stories.
her ghost was digging feverishly into the earth, its fingers curled like claws, like it was searching for something. it was a dirty, scrawny little thing, wearing no clothes except for a soiled fundoshi that looked as if it was strung together by luck and willpower. every so often, it would pull something stringy and limp into its mouth, devouring it rabidly, though she couldn’t make out what it was.
why would her imagination come up with something so… awful?
it wasn’t a pretty, or kind looking ghost to be sure, and she scratched her arms as an uncomfortable itch settled into her skin.
the specter paused, like a fawn that had been discovered.
and turned.
no… it was a wolf, but it was really just a boy.
a boy that stared at her with a basin full of blood in his eyes. a garden that should have been filled with a gorgeous array of ruby roses, was instead full of violence and malice, of death and root rot. this was not a normal, or happy, sort of boy like the boisterous ones in her village.
she still thought she was dreaming, still believed the boy was just a ghost.
because what else could he be? real boys didn’t have a second pair of small eyes beneath their normal ones. even if his were closed, his two pale lids shut tightly like an oyster.
would there be precious little red, red, red pearls underneath them?
a gentle gust of wind swept through the trees, ruffling the boys matted locks of hair, and he vanished from her sight like a puff of dust.
surely now it was a dream.
real boys couldn’t just disappear.
until she felt all the air knocked out from her lungs as she crashed backwards into the earth, sharp fingernails digging into the soft skin of her forearms, and the boy’s crimson eyes were consuming her in his fire.
she knew then it wasn’t a dream, because dreams couldn’t hurt her like this.
she kicked and struggled, her ears ringing from the force of her head knocking into the ground, screaming until one of his dirty hands covered her mouth. she stilled immediately, tears pricking the corner of her eyes, and sliding down the apples of her cheeks.
“you can’t steal,” the boy hissed, his voice sharp and pointed like nails, and he shook her roughly as he repeated like a mantra. “can’t steal, can’t steal.”
she whimpered and nodded frantically, as sharp stones from the earth pierced her skin, adding to her misery. the boy licked his lips, a snake tasting the air with its forked tongue, and bent down closer to her ear.
“i’m hungry” he whispered, a dusting of glee coating his words like powdery snow. “i want to eat you.”
the sky was haunted with the last light of the sunset, like the cries of a mourning mother, swirling with hues of orange and purple. she wondered if she was going to become a ghost that could only existed in her own mother’s dreams.
for the first time in her meager existence, she felt her childish immortality slipping between her tiny fingers.
something uncomfortably hot and wet spread out from beneath her thighs.
the boy sniffed once, twice, with his nose upturned.
then he cried out angrily, his red eyes flashing in the twilight hour, and shoved her roughly into the ground before releasing his grip on her, recoiling defensively infront of his hole of dirt. she scrambled up ungracefully to her feet, her chest heaving, wincing as she tasted bitter soil and salty tears on her tongue.
“yucky! dirty, dirty!” the boy spat indignantly, hypocritically, as if he wasn’t more soiled than she was.
he was rolling in the dirt now, rubbing his face and body with it as if it were soap, as if the coarse earth could wash her touch away from him. she took two steps backwards from him, feeling an eerie charge of energy settling into the edge of the forest.
like the spark of a flame that could ignite into a wildfire.
she took another slow step back.
and then another.
and another.
until she turned and fled, like a squawking bird escaping the grasp of a hawk, her short legs crying out as she sprinted faster than she ever had in her life. she ran all the way from the edge of the forest, up the slight incline of the main pathway through her village, and finally crashed through the doorway of her home, startling her mother who was scrubbing away at dirtied clothes in a bucketful of soapy water.
her mother gasped loudly, alarm rising like a looming mountain, always there and ever present. “whatever happened to you? you’re all scratched.”
lie.
she wailed loudly, messy snot dribbling down her nose and chin and right onto her mother’s worn, muted robes. her mother shushed her gently, bundling her child into her arms and pressing comforting kisses to her forehead.
“what happened, my dearest love?” her mother repeated, whispering softly and soothingly.
lie.
she somehow knew that if she told the truth, it would only invite chaos and misery into her home.
“i p-played in the forest a-and falled,” she finally hiccuped, her bottom lip pouting and wobbling.
her mother cooed, wiping away her tears with a warm, rough thumb. “you fell? my sweet, you’ll be alright. oh, oh. why have you wet yourself?”
more mucus ran down from her nose, and she wiped it messily with her palm as she shrugged her shoulders and said nothing. she let her mother fuss over her, completely unresponsive as she dunked her tiny body into a wooden bucket, washing away the touch of the wolfish, snake boy.
until all that remained of him were the little scratches dotting her arms – rough and ridged, lines carved into the trunks of trees.
she thought of him all through the night, even when her mother had tucked her into bed and tenderly kissed her brow. everything was unknown to her now, nothing was certain. was he actually like an animal, capable of following her scent and finding her here?
would he gorge on her until all that was left of her was red, red, red?
༺ ✤ ༻
the boy had taken over her life – he was everywhere, in everything.
haunting her.
taunting her.
filling her mind with paranoia and warped visions of his red eyes staring at her, always. she saw him in between the boards of the walls and floor, and in every bite of food she took. the wispy tendrils of his hands possessed hers, eating right alongside her. he was in the blood of her scrapes, which always seemed to reopen whenever she bathed, and in her tears as she whimpered quietly, unable to sleep as she hid beneath her blanket.
as if that could save her from him.
it was in the boy’s nature to haunt her with his hunt, to frighten and consume her every thought.
she couldn’t expect anything less than that; it was who he was.
she’d seen it in his eyes, a peephole into the true nature of his soul, and it was full of violence and cruelty and…
sadness.
… and beauty.
he was really just a sad, beautiful little boy.
a boy just as old as she was. a boy who had somehow been put on a path of loneliness, without light, kindness, or love.
it had to be some sort of twisted fascination she harbored for the boy, the same way she couldn’t tear her eyes away from the blood trickling from his scratches, or stop listening to the stories of ghosts and monsters in the night.
maybe it was his strange power that was possessing her, gripping her like quicksand and sucking her further and further down into his madness.
yes, that had to be it.
because why else would she be heading straight towards the edge of the forest, to him?
she tightly grasped a small bowl of rice and vegetables between her little hands, swiped from her own dinner right beneath her mother’s nose. it had long since cold, and she hoped the ghost wouldn’t mind. it was an offering, a desperate plea to break free from his curse that haunted her.
snap!
snap! crackle, snap!
a few twigs snapped loudly beneath her feet – a damning announcement.
she froze, nearly dropping her bowl, breathing quick and shallow puffs of air.
snap!
another one, this time from behind her.
she whirled around, and there he was.
the boy stood beside a thick tree trunk, his head cocked to the side and his eyes widened into full crimson moons. he was even more disheveled than he was a week ago, with mud caked to his skin and hair like dried, flaky clay. his ribs were more prominent too, scarily so, and his cheeks were gaunt like a skeletons.
he was weak.
far too weak, she realized.
she immediately extended her arms out, the bowl teetering on the edge of her fingertips, and breathlessly said, “yours.”
the boy grunted, “huh?”
snap! snap! crackle!
he’d taken a few steps forward, carefully, ever so fearfully.
she squeezed her eyes shut, turning her head up towards the twilight sky, her heart beating against her ribcage as if trying to escape, and tried more clearly, “food, for you.”
he was in front of her in a flash, his breath brushing over her cheeks. she cracked open an eye to peek at him, watching as he eyed the bowl with suspicion, sniffing loudly. he gagged offensively when his nose wandered too close to a vegetable, his tongue stretching far out from his mouth.
she half thought he was going to smack the bowl to the ground and lunge for her instead.
he’s going to eat me.
until he snatched it from her instead, retreating back behind the tree trunk.
she blinked, her lashes butterfly wings fluttering in a breeze.
there were the sounds of scoffing, rabid breathing and snuffling noises, and then nothing at all.
hiccup!
had he finished all of it already?
the boy’s face peeked out from behind the trunk, peering at her owlishly.
“why you back?” he asked simply, a touch of softness in his voice, the edge of a knife chipped and dulled.
she shrugged her shoulders. “you’re hungry.”
“but, what if i eat you?”
“tomorrow i’ll give you more, then you can’t eat me.”
he fully revealed himself, crouched low to the earth like a cat, staring up at her with his pupils blown. “you promise?”
she gulped. “i promise.”
“if you don’t, then i eat you!” he exclaimed, lips pulled back over his fangs in a threatening snarl, his hackles raised and shaking.
oddly, she didn’t feel afraid.
the ghost didn’t have the same malice as before; she could see his vulnerability in the way his fingers trembled. she felt it travel through the mountain air, settling onto her skin like a layer of dust. it wriggled like maggots, burrowing into her flesh and making her skin crawl.
her chest constricted painfully.
she felt so unbelievably and overwhelmingly sorry for him.
the boy scrunched his nose. “why’r you sad?”
“i’m not!” she replied quickly, a touch indignantly. she knew he would probably get angry if he knew how much she pitied him.
it was silent for quite some time as he stared at her, and she fidgeted in her spot. she knew she had to let him do this, to stay perfectly still like a rabbit in the reeds, as the wolf made its mind up whether it was hungry or not.
it seemed to work.
the boy huffed and collapsed to the ground in an ungraceful heap, his legs splayed out before him as he seemingly ignored her – a begrudging acceptance of her existing in his space.
she lowered herself to his level, the ground scraping beneath her legs, while maintaining that somewhat safe distance between them. her hands began to search for and pick up various rocks and twigs to play with, because she didn’t know what else to do to pass the time. the boy had his head held to the side, a shade of confusion painted over his cheeks as he clocked onto her every move.
she pretended he wasn’t there, ignoring the rising wave of bitter panic in her throat, and the fact that he was slowly inching closer to her, crawling to her like a prowling panther.
he sat beside her now, clearly observing how she sat with her legs crossed, then glanced towards his own legs kneeling into the dirt. she never stopped playing, pretending to be in her own world, watching from the corner of her eyes as the boy moved his body to mimic her posture and sitting position.
a giggle threatened to bubble out from between her lips.
the boy picked up a twig from her small pile, then retracted, looking at her with wonderful apprehension.
she gave him her full attention. “you can play too.”
another head tilt, and his pink lips curved downwards.
“…play?”
oh.
“have you never played before?”
“no, show me.”
and she did, without knowing how to really explain it. she told stories of how the twigs could be birds soaring between the gaps in the clouds, or the rocks could be fish darting in between the strands of a kelp forest. all the while, the boy was transfixed, and she began to really understand him for what he truly was.
scared and lonely, with an insatiable curiosity for new things – especially for her.
she only hoped she could live up to it.
༺ ✤ ༻
she discovered the boy’s name a fortnight later.
ryomen sukuna.
a strange sensation ran down her spine when she heard it for the first time, like a delicate lash from a whip made of fire.
she decided to ignore it.
they played together everyday since then, against the deep backdrop of the forest, and always during the duskiness of twilight. she would still sneak him scraps of whatever food she could spare, feeling guilty as her mother, who was none the wiser, always praised her for finishing her meals. her father would raise a questioning brow at her whenever she asked to play so late in the day, chiding her for being reckless, even if she passionately justified – albeit, borderline erraticly – that her imaginary friend would be very lonely without her.
“but why now? why can’t you play during the day with your… friend?”
“because he only comes out when the sun goes down.”
maybe sukuna really was a ghost.
she liked to hold onto that superstition. it made her lies a little less white, because he definitely wasn’t a figment of her imagination.
but it was still a lie, a pearlescent river of alabaster, and it had continued to flow strong for three years now.
she was nine years old, and during their time together, sukuna had only revealed glimpses of himself in little tidbits. it was like a sweet bite of plum on a hot summer’s day, satiating her for a time, but always leaving her hungry for more.
“where do you sleep?”
“i dig a big hole, you wanna see?”
“why do you only come after the sun?”
“i’m here all the time, you just don’t see me.”
but sometimes.
just sometimes, and only if she timed her questions right.
then sukuna would indulge her in just a little more.
“why are your eyes red?”
ryomen paused, a wickedly sharpened two-pronged stick in his hand, and shrugged nonchalantly. “i was hungry in my mother’s tummy, so i ate my brother.”
(there was a great clap of thunder somewhere far away, and the great sinful cut of the world bled just a little more.)
they were quiet for a long time after that.
he’d resumed stabbing the earth with his wooden weapon, completely unperturbed.
as if what he’d said was the most normal thing, like it was as easy as drinking the rain that fell from the pine leaves.
sukuna often said twisted things – things that reminded her of who she was really dealing with. although he had somewhat softened around her, he was still as wild and unforgiving as the mountainside he lived on.
she could never ever show him that it put her on edge.
still, much to her own shock, she was growing used to the depravity.
not that sukuna was always wicked, no. he would always ask her things, and she’d try to assume an air like her mother, knowledgeable and benevolent, as she guided him. when he wanted to know how she ate without using her hands, she took a pair of chopsticks from her kitchen and showed him how to use them. he’d sniff her hair, alarmingly too close, and asked how it was so much softer than his.
so one evening, she took him to the river where some of the villagers bathed during the day, and taught him how to wash himself.
“show me,” he’d ordered, his characteristic head tilt an open book of confusion.
he was more perplexed when she became flustered and refused to do it.
the ensuing conversation, in which she explained why she couldn’t just do that, was extremely awkward to say the least.
but she was even more surprised the next day when she came to play, and he was awkwardly standing there, his cheeks as pink as the once-hidden peaches in his hair. she’d stopped straight in her tracks, almost not recognizing her ghost without all the grime and dirt covering him.
he’s so beautiful…
ryomen blinked slowly, catlike, staring at his unusually clean feet with something akin to bashfulness. “what?”
“nothing,” she smiled, gentle like the summer rain that had just started to fall. “let’s play.”
༺ ✤ ༻
it was autumn now.
the leaves of the maple trees had turned into molten gold and burnt orange peels, and the remaining blooms had already died out petal by petal. there was a chill bite in the air, a promise of snow and piercing cold to come. she hated when the weather was like this, she worried about sukuna living in the wild in such conditions, and it only made it harder to go out and play with him in the evenings.
he, however, enjoyed it whenever the weather turned cold – it soothed the fire in his blood.
or so he said.
sukuna was lying down beside her, saccharine on the grass whilst looking up at the sky. he was wearing some washed-out linen clothes, a size too big, that she had managed to steal one day from the village boys bathing in the river. the deep plum wine in the skies mixed with the blood in his eyes – all four of them – the two colors swirling and teasingly touching each other.
two nights ago, the wind had been howling like wolves, screaming of murder and spilled blood in the darkness. there had been a strange heaviness in the air, a sort of static, like lighting biding its time to strike.
when she saw sukuna the next morning, he had a proud grin on his face, his teeth and mouth speckled with blood. all his eyes were wide open, staring at her as if to say ‘look at us, look at us!’
she knew that he had committed some sort of depravity in the night to have earned the transformation.
but he never told her.
perhaps she was never meant to know.
they were always alert, darting between everything and anything that moved even in the slightest – from the leaves rustling high up a tree, to the birds soaring high up in the sky, and to the blades of grass tickled by the wind.
and her.
one always rested on her.
“ryo,” she started, ripping fistfuls of grass. “do you like to play in the snow?”
the eye fixed on her rolled in annoyance. “no, and stop calling me that,” he huffed.
she rolled her eyes, blowing a hot-pink raspberry at him. “yes you do, liar! i know you do.”
she knew that sukuna loved to be teased, but only when he was carefree and relaxed. during moments like now, with the ghost of the permanent scowl sewn into his features unraveled into wispy threads of gold. he was seriously mulling over what she had just said, something she knew he also enjoyed – untangling mysteries and puzzles in his mind, a satisfied gleam in his eyes when he finally figured them out.
“i don’t… like anything.”
she stilled.
a blade of grass fell from her grip, and she gnawed on her bottom lip.
why did she feel so embarrassed?
he wasn’t really referring to her at all – and yet, it all felt so personal.
“okay,” was all she could muster weakly, barely a whisper, resuming her onslaught on the grass like nothing mattered at all.
maybe none of it ever did.
sukuna turned his head and stared at her strangely, but said nothing.
thwack!
he was grinning wildly now. “let me chase you.”
she wiped away the raindrops that had splattered onto her cheek, a slight sting on her thigh from his smack. “i don’t wanna play.”
“but… you like this game,” sukuna frowned, head tilted, rolling over with his elbows digging into the grass. “why not?”
“i jus-ow! stop hitting me!”
“start running then.”
so she did, quite begrudgingly.
her footsteps crackled loudly against the forest floor, as the dark grey clouds darkened even more and the rain fell faster, and the sun dipped further behind a neighboring mountain. sukuna was hot on her trail, and she knew how easily he could catch up to her in an instant, but he never did. it was as if he switched off whatever made him less human during their games. maybe it was to give her a fighting chance, or perhaps it was entertaining to him to know he could always win whenever he wanted to.
if she got to the village fast enough, she would win today.
she swung herself against a tree trunk to propel herself forward, imagining she was an agile deer leaping between the trees.
get to the village.
win.
run, you can wi-
her leg gave way beneath her, sliding up in an arc as she slipped backward. her head hit the ground, and stars and minuscule black moons danced in her eyes amidst the silver clouds.
sukuna appeared above her, his face upside down, all of his eyes on her with what looked something like panic in his irises. it made her heart skip a beat, followed by a swarming terror of bats and a throbbing swell of pain in her left ankle.
and then… sheer, crippling embarrassment.
she started to wail loudly.
big salty droplets squeezed out from her tearducts, running to her temples and mixing with the rain in the dirt. sukuna's face contorted painfully, his mouth pulled into a grimace, his eyes darting over her like a hummingbird flitting between flowers.
"s-stop doing that," he tried to order harshly, but was cruelly betrayed by the shaky wobbling his lip.
snot messily dribbled down her nose as her ankle started to throb more intensely. "it h-hurts!"
"stop crying!" sukuna exclaimed, his fists clenched and shaking. "just stop."
she made the mistake of moving her leg, and cried out as fiery pain licked a smoldering trail straight up to her head. "ryo! please. make it stop, make it stop, make it stop."
his face fell, crumbling into pieces. with a tenderness she had never known, and the sleeves of his shirt falling over his hands, sukuna gently held the sides of her face.
she stilled, a drop of crystal suspended in time.
he hushed her, soothingly. "it's okay. just... please. stop crying."
she sniffled, broken sobs stuttering out from her lips, until they fizzed out altogether. all the while, sukuna never let her go, their foreheads brushing against each other, his peach frizz blowing in the wind. oh, how she wished she could see his face. she wanted to know that he wasn't faking this level of care – of emotion – if nothing really mattered to him.
sukuna lifted his head, his blood eyes glossy and pained, and whispered, "does it still hurt?"
her bottom lip trembled dangerously and she nodded. sukuna sighed, his hands leaving her face and scrunching his hair.
"i-," he paused, nervous. "let me try something."
sukuna looked at her expectantly, eyes widened and pleading. she nodded again, not sure exactly what she was agreeing to, he moved slowly, cautiously, as if any sudden move would set off her pain again. all the while, his gaze was trained on her, settled and pooling on her already swelling ankle.
he breathed out shakily, placing a rough palm over her warm skin, and she whimpered as a piping hot sensation seeped through to her bone. it was nothing like pain, but it felt like sukuna. it was a strange feeling, like little bubbles popping on the skin he touched. she knew then what she was feeling – his power. sukuna was concentrating hard, little grunts escaping his lips every so often, his brow deeply furrowed into a valley of ridges.
the power rose, a tidal wave of fire and blood, and then collapsed into nothing.
he hissed in frustration, sharply pulling his hand back from her ankle, head bowed almost… shamefully.
it was quiet for a heartbeat longer before sukuna muttered, “i’m sorry, i can’t fix you. i’m not strong enough.”
her heart swelled, and she smiled weakly. “it’s okay, ryo.”
he looked up at the dark sky, mouth opening and closing as he chased his words and settled on, “its going to be night soon.”
she looked up too, watching the veil of the silver crescent moon lifting. “mhm.”
she sat up slowly, sukuna immediately turning to watch her. “i-i don’t think i can walk, ryo,” she mumbled. “how can i get home?”
“but… you can’t stay here.”
“i know.”
“the bears will hunt you.”
“ryo, i know!”
his head tilted and a spark lit in his eyes.
“i can carry you!” sukuna blurted out, his chest puffed out proudly. “i’ll bring you to where i sleep. it’s warm there, and then the bears can’t eat you because i’ll be there.”
“… you can fight a bear?”
“what do you think i eat now? i told you I didn’t need your stinky vegetables anymore!”
she blinked three times.
“okay, and then what?”
“and then… i can figure it out in the morning. i’ll keep trying to make you better when you sleep so you can go home.”
without hearing another word from her, sukuna swept her into his arms, eliciting a startled yelp from her. he settled into a brisk pace, taking them both much farther away from the village. the light darkened considerably this deep into the forest, the trees hugging each other so tightly that hardly any of the sun’s waning light could pierce between the leaves.
suddenly, he stopped.
sukuna hunched over, her cheek squishing against his chest, and gently placed her down into a cavernous burrow.
"you really weren't joking when you said you sleep in a hole," she half-heartedly joked, looking around.
he scoffed, crossing his legs and sitting beside her injured side, halfway turned towards the entrance to the burrow. "you don't like it?"
"i never said that! it's just... different."
"not all of us live in a nice home."
the air turned slightly sour, lemons tainting his softness, and they were completely silent. the sounds of the night became louder then; strange animal cries off in the distance, and the rain pelting down from outside, steady drip drip drip of droplets falling from the entrance. sukuna was right, his burrow was reasonably warm. almost, dare she say it, actually comfortable.
he was still beside her, a hand pressed lightly to her injury, his power ebbing and rushing forward like a wave against the shore. as the night grew longer, sukuna seemed to be getting more and more agitated, hissing lowly as he failed at every attempt to heal her. she couldn't sleep regardless of his noises; the enormity of the situation she was in was too jarring. what if a bear discovered their sanctuary? what would her parents be thinking right now? sukuna had to be hungry, as well tired from expending his power. could he really fight a bear if it came down to it?
"ryo?"
"go to sleep."
"but i-"
"shut up, or i'll let the bears eat you."
"ryo! i just wanted to ask you something."
he groaned in annoyance. "what then?"
"earlier, when you said you didn't like anything. did you mean it?"
"well... yes. i don't lie."
"oh, yeah. i know."
sukuna tilted his head, both left eyes rolling towards her. "why did you get sad when i said that?"
heat rose to her cheeks. "did not!"
"you did so! i felt you get sad! you’re getting sad again now"
she fidgeted uncomfortably. "because!"
"because?"
"because, because- ugh! because then that means you don't like me, okay? and that hurts my feelings.”
red eyes flashed in the dark. “why do you care if i like you?”
“because we’re-you… you’re my friend. of course i care if you like me.”
“but, what if i don’t care?”
her heart dropped, and a fresh tear prickled the corner of her eye. “you don’t?” she mumbled quietly, a drop in an ocean of naive, childish feelings.
sukuna’s face crumbled again, and he gripped her ankle just a fraction tighter. “no! i mean, yes! i do care.”
he bashfully looked away, mumbling under his breath before he said a bit louder, “i like you.”
she perked right up at that. “you do?”
“mhm.”
“you promise?”
a low grumble. “promise.”
༺ ✤ ༻
for five days and five nights, she was in another world.
a world where all the memories of her past were washed away by the swirling green of the deep forest. it was an almost cathartic experience, a transition from one plane of existence to the next – one drawn in dripping red ink, a solitary existence that belonged only to ryomen sukuna.
or, at least, it was easier to imagine it that way.
otherwise, the painful pangs of guilt would strike her violently whenever her thoughts strayed to her village and family. if she paused and closed her eyes, she could feel the steady thrum of her mother’s grief, like an earthquake reverberating across the distance between them. it was all too much for her young mind to bear.
and so, she willingly slipped through the doorway into a new reality, where it was just her and her crimson ghost.
during that time, she had learned how to read him.
his anger was a lashing snake hidden between the rocks – wickedly sharp and quick to strike her with venomous words. they would spread quickly though her blood, making her huddle into herself, perfectly still, like a mouse meeting its most unfortunate end.
fortunately for her, she was only bitten once, and the snake had only acted out of hunger, not genuine malice.
if sukuna’s anger had been real, she doubted she would have lived to see the next sunrise.
his apology came much later after he had returned from the hunt, a satiated tiger slow to act. the only acknowledgement of his remorse was a silent head pat with a bloody palm.
his fear was iron claws scratching against a rock, piercingly grating and scraping at the walls of her heart. if sukuna was fearful, she knew it by the way he stalked and paced outside the burrow, a whip strike away from pouncing on anything that moved even slightly out of the ordinary.
“there are more people in the forest,” sukuna would mutter darkly during those fearful fits. “they're shouting your name.”
“did they see you?”
he responded with nothing more than a pointed look.
but above all, it was his kindness that was most present.
she first noticed it in the way sukuna corrected himself around her, protecting her from certain aspects of his lifestyle. for instance, when she saw the blood on his hands after a kill, or saw how horrified she was when he offered her raw, dripping meat from a deer he had just killed. it was in the way he had immediately changed his ways – washing his hands after a hunt, and skinning and butchering his kills far from the burrow so she wouldn’t see a thing.
it was also in the way he pretended he wasn’t purposely foraging berries for her, dropping them onto her lap like he had just randomly stumbled across them. it was in his stubborn refusal to give up on healing her every night when he thought she was asleep, and in how he treated her like precious sugar glass – so very careful in how he handled her.
it shouldn’t have been so surprising to discover that ryomen sukuna was neither cruel nor mad.
he was still that lonely boy from all those years ago, still learning how to be kind while yearning and searching for love.
one day, she saw him play with fire between his fingertips as if it were nothing extraordinary.
she saw how the blood in his eyes came alive, like dancing waves of a turbulent red sea. when he looked at her, she didn't expect him to smile so gently as he started a small fire and cooked her meat for her.
after sukuna had shown her more of his power, the cracks in his soul seemed to split apart, and his fire teemed and spilled out uncontrollably. he finally began to open up to her, telling her things she had always wanted to discover, along refreshingly childish ramblings.
“you know, i actually didn’t mind eating your stinky vegetables. yeah.”
“deer aren’t actually that pretty, but watching them when they’re still is… relaxing?”
“yeah, i lied before. i do like playing in the snow, especially throwing it at you.”
but some of the worst things would also spill out – things she would have preferred to never know, because they were dark and cruel enough to change the way she viewed the world.
“i didn’t mean to eat my brother, but i was just really hungry in my mother’s tummy, and she wasn’t feeding us.”
“she called me a demon for what i did.”
“no, i don’t know know where she is now, and i don’t know about my father too.”
“i do… feel a bit bad about eating my brother, because he was hurting.”
there was a stretched, almost foreboding silence before sukuna finally asked the question that must have been on his mind since the day they met.
“are you afraid of me?”
the fire spit and fizzled, and she hissed as a spark danced dangerously close to her skin.
“no, ryo. you’re my best friend.”
“really?!”
“well, duh. you saved me.”
he shuffled ever so slightly closer, their arms just about to touch, and mumbled, “so did you.”
she really believed she could have stayed with sukuna forever.
but her new world was shattered on the morning of the sixth day, as if the cosmic rulings of the world had decreed that they'd both had enough of a good thing.
still, it was all her fault – it had to be.
she was the one who insisted that she was too cold, that the chill in the air was day beyond what she could tolerate. she felt the wet tears clinging to her lashes were about to freeze over, and sukuna could not stand to see her cry. so, despite his own warnings, he lit her a fire for her during the day and watched nervously as the smoke rose high above the trees.
it wasn't long before the hunters came.
they came silently, prowling and closing in on them both.
and sukuna knew it.
he was bristling defensively, his neck hairs rising, eyes closed, and head bowed in the direction of a bush that had rustled unnaturally. the hunters crept forward cautiously, eyeing the boy with barely concealed suspicion, while beckoning for her to come with them.
she stayed put, pretending she was a statue of ice that couldn’t understand a thing.
a hunter tightened his grip on his bow.
another nocked an arrow.
and sukuna opened his eyes.
chaos erupted, a whirlwind of metal and feathers and red, red, red.
the hunters charged forward, consumed by a fear they could not rationally explain – of demons and monsters possessing their hearts and minds. but sukuna was faster than all of them, disappearing in a flash, and reappearing to hurl a hunter against a tree.
the poor souls had no clue what they were up against.
she knew sukuna could – and would – kill them all.
"no! no! no!" she screamed, heaving and desperately clawing at her face. “please.”
somehow, he could understand her amidst the shouts and cries of anguish from the men who had come for her.
(he always did, he always would.)
the boy of blood and fire stilled, dropping his hands to his sides, and the wolves descended upon him instantly.
she screamed once more as a hunter seized her, dragging her away from the fray of madness. all the while, sukuna remained curled in a fetal position, all of his eyes locked on her retreating figure as he endured the the blows to his body with stoic silence.
only his eyes betrayed his pain.
༺ ✤ ༻
her heart was weak.
it could only beat with half its strength, as if it couldn’t be bothered to do what was expected of it.
when she was returned to the village, to the nearly suffocating embrace of her weeping mother, she was hailed as a miracle – a little girl who had somehow survived a demon. she was cherished and fussed over by the whole village, her family showered with gifts of millet and rice, plenty of dried boar to survive the winter, and stone amulets for protection against the evil that had touched them.
meanwhile, sukuna had escaped.
the hunters had said the demon vanished into the highest peaks of the mountains, where they could not follow. they bowed low and deep to her mother, their knees buckling as they vowed vengeance on the scourge of the mountain. but she knew it was all for show. they were completely terrified of him, too proud to admit it, and so the mere memory of sukuna was spat on and desecrated by the other villagers.
oh, if only they knew the truth of it all.
it took a fortnight for her heartstrings to stop aching from the pain of being ripped apart from sukuna, and even longer for her piercing wails to cease every night before she slept. her tears burned, tears of fire and salt, made from sukuna's precious blood that had dripped down his face as he was beaten.
all because of her.
her parents couldn't fathom her sheer anguish, perplexed and frightened by its intensity, and only able to explain it as the effect of a demon. all they could do was pray for her recovery, and the rest of the village did the same.
in the beginning, when she had exhausted all her energy from wailing and crying, she would peer into the darkness of the room. through the gaps in the walls of her home, she willed and prayed so fervently that she would one day see four red orbs peering back at her.
but twelve winters and summers came and went without sukuna, and she began to wonder if had all been just a dream. an elaborate tale of an imaginary friend her mind had tricked her into believing was real. a ghost that was never meant to be, one she ought to bury in the deepest recesses of her memories where he could finally rest.
but, oh, how lifeless her world was without him.
nobody could understand or see how the anguish swirled beneath her skin. she didn’t even have the words to describe it to herself anymore, other than she was not doing well at all and felt sick all the time.
how very isolating it all was.
she was fifteen now, and all her parents could talk to her about was marriage.
“you are a young lady now!” her mother would gush loudly, almost nagging. “one who survived a demon, and every man who passes through the village wants your hand.”
she tried not to think about it at all, but it loomed larger and larger over her head as the years passed, and she doubted she could remain as she was for much longer. in those moments, her thoughts would always stray to sukuna, and how if she could have married anybody, then it would have been him.
it was the only thing that felt right.
she tried not to dwell on that for too long.
but trying not thinking about ryomen sukuna was like telling the sky not to cry.
there were often tales from afar that the traveling merchants told the villagers as they stopped for respite and to sell their crafts – stories full of horrors and atrocities. entire villages, along with all their inhabitants, were found burnt to cinders or encased in a tomb of ice, with no rhyme or reason why, simply there one minute and gone the next. there were accounts of cries and calls from strange creatures in the night, born from suffering and pain. some spoke of certain people being able to wield magic, only to be found mangled and nearly destroyed by others of the same power.
she would think of sukuna after hearing those stories and wonder what kind of life he was living.
was he just as lonely as she was?
or was he happy indulging in the violence of his nature?
then, one fateful day, her father placed a hand on her head fondly and said, “tonight is your omiai, dearest. you will finally meet the man the nakodo has chosen as your husband.”
and that was that.
that night, she stared into the eyes of the man she was to marry.
they were kind, warm – so very plain. he spoke a little to her, mainly about how he could offer her a better life than what she had now. something more comfortable, with a better house, more food, and even kimonos made of silk.
it all sounded… safe.
reliable.
her family was happy she was marrying such a man, and assured her that they would come and visit her in her new home once she had settled in.
she didn’t care about that at all.
all she could think about was red, red, red, and how it felt like the ultimate betrayal.
she could do nothing but nod placidly at them all.
really, she should count her blessings that she was about the same age as her soon-to-be husband, and that he seemed likely to treat her with kindness and respect. maybe, if she tried hard enough, she could convince herself that she would find some measure of fulfillment in her marriage.
she could learn to accept it all, even force herself to be happy.
even if a part of her could never be scrubbed clean from all the red.
the day before she left for her betrothed’s village, she went to the clearing in the forest where it all began. it was midday, the sun high in the air, and the sweet bite of winter kissed her cheeks as she stood there clutching the white silks that had been gifted to her.
“things are going to change for me,” she whispered to the trees that had long watched over her and sukuna, her head bowed low. "and i do not believe i will ever return here.”
desperation gripped her in a suffocating hold, hooking its claws deep into her spine. she wondered if there was a string that connected her to sukuna. a red-stained one, dripping in their blood. would he feel it wherever he was in the world if she pulled it hard enough?
if she tried, would he come for her?
(a gust of wind, a spark of flame, and a ripple of blood.)
she had realized some time ago what she had felt as a child.
but it was still a terrifying thing to admit to herself, even now, in this quiet corner of the world, that she had once been in love with ryomen sukuna.
it was best to bury it here with the trees.
tonight was the eve of her wedding, and all she wanted was to have just stayed there.
it was supposed to have been a night of solitary peace.
the last one she would ever have, with only the sound of the herbal bathwater rippling and the scent of yuzu in the air to keep her tethered to this world.
it had all been overturned in an instant.
the monsters came swiftly down from the mountainside in the night, slaughtering and tearing their way through every home in the village. the night was full of brutal screams, blood moons and snow falling from the weeping clouds. she could see them, but others weren’t so lucky. that brief look of terrified confusion was haunting – blood bubbling from their mouths as their throats were slashed by something they couldn’t see.
she stared at her fiancé, both of them trapped beneath a wooden beam, as his eyes, wide and lifeless, had not a single trace of the kindness they had once held. death had never been so close to her before, she could almost feel the cold kiss of its blade against her throat, beckoning her closer to the other side.
their assailant was a thin creature, broken and bent, with a feminine form. it licked the dripping blood of her betrothed from its wickedly sharp claws, unperturbed to the rest of the carnage unfolding around it.
“i miss you, i miss you,” it hissed in a low, screeching voice. “i love you, i miss you.”
the demon turned to her, eyeless, with only a mouth full of teeth and a thousand tongues, as if it could smell the life and heat fading from her blood. it crawled sideways towards her, its scraggly black hair brushing the ground in front of her face.
it paused, dipping its face down towards her, its reeking, snarling breaths close to her ear.
she screamed weakly as it sank its teeth into her shoulder.
soon, all our ghosts will dance together.
pale pink rose petals fluttered from the sky, falling along with the snow.
how beautiful is death?
“hmph, idiot.”
a flash of a thousand blades, and the world turned red and then black.
༺ ✤ ༻
it was the smell of incense that coaxed her back from the dreams of death.
honeyed rays of light danced behind her closed eyelids, their warmth caressing her brow and lips in golden life. when her eyes finally opened, she was convinced that she must have already been reborn. her body was wrapped in opulent silk sheets, delicately embroidered with intricate gold and silver flowers. a byobu depicting a blooming cherry blossom tree stood a few paces in front of the bed.
this was a bedroom of royalty, dripping with extravagance.
she felt as if she didn’t belong here.
but when she pinched the skin of her forearm, felt her legs moving and toes wriggling, and heard the sheets rustling loudly, she knew that this was all very real. all the blood that had been spilled was real, the kind man who would have given her a good life was truly dead, along with his entire village.
“you're awake then are you?”
she froze.
that voice.
it can't be.
so intimately familiar, yet it belonged to the strangest of strangers – deep as the oceans she had never seen, mysterious and smoky like the swirls of incense wafting through the room.
this was the voice of death.
she felt like she had heard it before, as if she should know who it belonged to.
because it was too beautiful to forget.
“sukuna?” she called out in disbelief, her voice fragile and trembling like leaves.
a low chuckle followed. “you still know me.”
oh my.
“h-how are you here? where have you – but y-you disappeared.”
the outline of shadow loomed large behind the byobu, and she gulped.
“i’ve been everywhere in this country. there’s nowhere i haven’t seen.”
it’s him, it’s really him.
sukuna hummed again, his figure swaying. she could make out the shadow of the bridge of his nose and his lips, as well as the elaborate layers of clothing he wore.
“do you remember what happened?” he finally asked after a prolonged silence.
she clenched her fists tightly. “yes.”
“good. and before you accuse me of it, i had nothing to do with what happened to you.”
“i-i wasn't going to.”
“how quaint. it’s rare that i’m not accused of causing wanton violence.”
she watched his shadow reach over and pour a liquid into a cup, followed by soft sipping noises as he drank from it.
“those... those things,” she began tepidly. “is that what you are?”
sukuna snorted. “no. i'm nothing like those low-grade cretins.” he sipped from his cup again. “although, it’s good that you can see curses. next time, you should run instead of just stand there.”
she was starting to remember him again.
she knew that he was nervous; it was evident in his sharp jibes toward her. sukuna always acted like this in unfamiliar situations, when he was unsure of how to act around her. so he would poke and prod because, at least, he understood pain and anger.
she chose to ignore it.
“i went back to the village,” he said, clearing his throat. “it hasn't changed much.”
a flash of terror struck her like lightning.
“but imagine my surprise when i discovered that something had actually changed,” sukuna’s voice had taken on a goading tone, and she could tell he wasn't pleased in the slightest. “you had left to go and get married, of all things.”
my family.
he scoffed, as if he sensed her shift in emotions. “oh, don't worry. your parents told me quite willingly. they were smart enough to know they couldn’t keep me from you.”
a trail of ice and fire ran down her spine.
oh, how much more dangerous have you really become, ryomen sukuna?
dread settled onto her bones like melted lead, and despite her better judgement, she sputtered out, "why now, after all this time?"
silence.
maybe he didn’t even know why.
sukuna's silhouette swayed back and forth behind the byobu, like beech trees high up the mountains, struggling to stay upright during a blizzard. like them, he was battling, but always against himself. his perpetual internal war against that small part inside of him that was human; full of his pain, fear, and kindness. sukuna’s cup was overflowing, even if he didn’t realize it, spilling and pouring everywhere – but she knew it.
she’d known it for the longest time.
“ryo,” her voice cracked like splintering glass. “answer me.”
he sighed, exasperated, “its been so long” – a sharp exhale – “but i can’t stop bleeding!”
utterly perplexed, she frowned. “bleeding? wha-”
sukuna’s shadow rose like a bonfire, erratically pacing in front of the byobu, and she could have sworn she saw the dancing shadows of four swaying arms.
he snarled, the words wrenched from between his fangs, "they tore you from me, and it made my heart bleed. it hasn’t stopped bleeding, because of you."
bang!
his heavy fist struck the screen, and she flinched frightfully.
“i-i don’t k-know what you mean,” she stuttered fearfully, her breaths coming out in rapid, little puffs. “i don’t understand what’s going on.”
he groaned, collected himself, and rolled his shoulders back purposefully. when he spoke again, his tone was calm, with none of the previous fire that had been spitting out from between his teeth.
“it doesn’t matter,” sukuna said, moving away from the cover as his silhouette disappeared. “you’re here now.”
the hidden implications were not as subtle as he thought. he was just as possessive as he had ever been, and it seemed that ryomen sukuna would not be letting go of her again.
she was still his, and had been for all these long years.
“you must be hungry,” he said, swiftly changing the subject. “come here.”
her heart quickened.
slowly, she rose from the safety of the bed, each step as momentous as it was absolutely terrifying. after all this time, she would see sukuna again. the boy who had once protected her, coveted her, and shielded her from the worst parts of himself. the one who wanted to change his ways and be softer for her.
she rounded the byobu.
and there he was.
her bones shivered as her mind froze her in place, stopping her from moving a single step closer.
sukuna was sitting perfectly cross-legged in front of a low table, his eyes widened ever so slightly and his lips parted. a hand was frozen mid-air, suspending in bringing his cup closer to his mouth.
oh, how much he had changed.
sukuna had grown significantly in height, could quite easily tower over her if he stood. he was no longer a boy, but a man – big, broad, and dangerous. and she had not been mistaken before; he had four arms, adorned with strangest black markings, just like his face. if it hadn’t been obvious before, it was now. sukuna was everything taboo in this world, an embodiment of death and fury itself.
“sit,” he ordered, breaking his gaze and motioning in front of him.
his words were in a refined tongue, the kind spoken by highborn royalty and nobles spoke in – those who were educated and understood things beyond the grasp of people like her. she obeyed, feeling the urge to be as well-spoken as possible.
she had never felt so small or so common in all her life.
there was an array of different foods on the table, each more richly presented than the next. elegant bowls held freshly cut fish, arranged to look like the petals of a flower. at the centre of the table sat a lacquered bowl of sekihan at the center of the table, the red bean rice a sharp contrast to the earthy tones of the pickled vegetables around it. mochi of all colors and shapes were delicately wrapped in oak leaves, and chopsticks of pearl and gold were laid beside each of their settings.
sukuna cleared his throat. “so, marriage.” she nodded silently, picking up a piece of mochi. he continued, “i’m assuming it was arranged.”
“yes. he-uh, arrived one day in the village, he was a merchant. my father and the nakodo approved, and that was it.”
he hummed thoughtfully, a fearsome blaze in his eyes. “and did you want this?”
dangerous territory, tread carefully.
“n-not really, but he seemed… kind.”
a flash of red fury crossed his face, and sukuna pursed his lips. “i see. is that what matters most to you, then – kindness?”
careful, careful, careful.
“well… i did not want to end up with a man who would hurt me.”
a dry chuckle. “and do you believe that i will?”
a flash of a memory – of a burrow, of shared tears and painful farewells.
never.
“no,” she replied firmly, picking up another piece of mochi and chewing.
he seemed to approve of her answer, watching as she continued to eat. “good.”
they were silent again, the only sounds coming from the distant chirping of birds and the gentle trickle of a fountain outside. sukuna’s smaller eyes remained fixed on her, while the rest of his attention was on his meal and sake, his expression intensely contemplative and serious. his earlier heat had subsided into a brooding stillness, and he seemed just as amazed as she was that they were finally in each other’s presence again.
she bit her lip before tepidly trying his nickname on her tongue again, “ryo?”
he stilled for a moment, his eyes glistening with a hint of vulnerability before it vanished, and then made a questioning noise.
“what exactly do you expect from me here?”
“you will receive an education, i will not allow you to remain illiterate. you will learn to read and write, and study the arts and poetry. that is all i ask in return.”
“in return for what?”
“for residing in my residence with me. you will not return to the mountains or the village, and you will never see your parents again.”
this was it.
her childhood dream of staying with sukuna was finally here. perhaps he had really felt her pulling on their red string, felt her desperation and fear, and had come to save her. he wasn’t entirely human, after all; maybe he could have sensed her from so far away, and known about that deep hole within her. and so, he had taken her away from it all, demanding only that she say goodbye to everything she had ever known.
but things were different now.
they weren’t little children anymore. there was a taste of change in the air – something tantalizing and liberating. their dynamics had shifted, whether they wanted it or not. adulthood had brought new possibilities that couldn’t have been there before, the kind that made her heart race and chest flutter.
in the way sukuna’s eyes flashed, she felt that he knew it too.
it was her fate after all, she had just been too young to comprehend it.
so be it.
“alright.”
༺ ✤ ༻
the ink was blacker than raven feathers.
drip! drip! drip!
as beautiful as the depth of midnight, it shouldn’t be wasted.
she bowed her head, pensively holding her brush. the words were right there on her fingertips, straight from the centre of her heart, but she didn’t know how to say them.
or rather, if she could say them correctly.
biting her lip, she lightly pressed her brush to the page, the words flowing out with every stroke. when she was done, she leaned back on her heels and looked expectantly at her teacher.
“your brush technique was incorrect,” uraume chided emotionlessly, their icy aura ever present. “but you were close. try it like this instead, see?”
sukuna’s second had been tasked with educating her and showing her the finer ways of noble life. under uraume’s tutelage, she learned to draw the beautiful curves of hiragana and the straight, angular lines of katakana. she was introduced to the golden literature of her country, where she delved into classic and more modern texts, and learned to appreciate the hidden depths beneath the surface of grand tales and poetry.
once, she had been jealous of uraume. it was unnerving to see how much confidence sukuna placed in the ambiguous and frosty figure, and it hurt to know he trusted someone other than her. but she soon came to realize that uraume’s sole desire was to serve sukuna, and sukuna harbored nothing for them other than respect that surely had been well earned.
“try it again,” uraume suggested, returning to their position behind her and watching over her shoulder as she picked up the brush once more.
moreover, uraume was neither cruel nor haughty about her illiteracy and never treated her like a lowborn. they always guided her with a gentle coldness and a detached tone of instruction. she wondered what they thought about the nature of her relationship with sukuna, and if perhaps uraume had ever been jealous of her. she liked to think they hadn’t been, and if they had, they never showed it or asked any questions. for that, she was grateful.
what she had with sukuna wasn’t something she could describe easily.
he was there now, one of his eyes watching the way her hands moved with the brush. it wasn’t unusual that he was present; sukuna often observed their lessons, seating himself a distance and quietly reading a book or scroll. he never lavished her with praise, such was not his nature, but offered more subtle compliments in her progress: a tilt of his head, a single nod, and a hum of approval.
she would be lying to herself if she said it didn’t thrill her to hold his attention.
they only grew closer as time went on, building new little routines with each other. every night after they dined together, sukuna would tap his fingers rhythmically on the low table, completely silent, as she either read poetry from a book or recited it from memory. these were moments of softness, sukuna's strange way of drawing closer her, as the red thread connecting them weaved them closer to each other with every passing night. his gratitude was silent too: a heavy hand on her head, a quick press of his fingers to her cheek, and a small smile as he left.
it was easy to imagine sukuna as changed in those moments, a regal lord always composed and calm.
but that wasn't the reality of the world.
she was frequently reminded of it.
"i need to go," he would suddenly say, abruptly pulling her from her focus.
she closed her book and peered up at him through her lashes. “where?”
sukuna smirked, a wild gleam in his eyes. “to quench my thirst.”
he would then disappear, but never for more than a few days at a time. she liked to hope that his brief absences were because he disliked leaving her for too long. when sukuna returned, he was like a predator satiated from the hunt – more at ease, prone to teasing and sending her into a shy fluster. she realized quickly that he was still as he had been when he was a boy; always acting upon his desires and impulses without a shred of restraint.
although, sukuna kept her well away from any glimpse of that side of him.
she was relieved to be spared from it. even though she had accepted his nature, she was far more content to remain his tether to a calmer side, always ready to pull him back into the peaceful river of soothing milk and honey that was her company. yet, she couldn’t help but wonder if that was all she would ever be to him.
she had to wait three years for the winds of romance to finally shift.
the day after her eighteenth birthday, sukuna began leaving things for her to find.
sometimes the gifts were small, such as delicate hairpins, vibrant silks, or rare fruits from distant lands. they would enjoy the fruits together, her laughter filling the room as she watched him scowl at their unfamiliar taste. other times, the gifts were more extravagant: a retinue of handmaidens to attend to her every need, opulent jūnihitoe crafted by the best artisans, the emperor’s most exquisite jewelry, and the rarest art.
but perhaps the most precious gift of all was his poetry.
she didn’t know why she had assumed sukuna had no taste for poetry. after all, he had ensured she studied it, and seemed to enjoy listening to her recite it. she had thought it was to encourage her to uphold the traditions of noble women studying the arts, to refine herself as a proper lady. given his impulsive nature, she merely thought he lacked the time and patience to write his own poems.
but oh, how he had a way with words.
it wasn’t in the more traditional styles she was used to reading, but it was uniquely sukuna’s. he was never one to follow the rules anyways. they had started off expressing the calming joy he felt in her company, with gentle musings about her being like a light summer rain or the soft morning glow of the sun. those early verses were lighthearted, designed to make her heart flutter with silly little butterflies.
and now?
now they could make her heart melt into a puddle of its own blood, making her body run hot with feverish, burning emotions.
with every poem she read, warmth would spread through her cheeks and chest, her bones shaking from the intensity of it all. it embarrassed her how obviously and hopelessly in love she felt. sukuna, however, was completely unruffled, a knowing smile playing on his lips as he watched her stumble over her words.
“any particular reason why you have that stupid smile on your face?” he’d tease, ostentatiously chewing on a piece of fruit.
she looked away petulantly, a slight pout forming on her lips. “stop it, ryo!”
it was blatantly obvious he savored this.
how could he possibly expect her to act normally around him after reading something like that? these poems were a gateway to his soul, a window straight through his eyes and into his heart. she could hardly contain herself any longer, and it was almost cruel that sukuna was keeping her in suspense for even a moment longer.
but did sukuna even want marriage?
he never liked being bound to anything, always pursuing whatever he desired whenever he wanted to. perhaps he wanted the benefits of courting her without ever becoming tied to her. she wasn’t sure if she could ever accept the idea of being his concubine. after all they had been through, it would crush her soul.
they were taking a stroll together in the gardens after one of her lessons, but the air was tense. sukuna stood unusually close to her, completely silent as they moved together, stopping occasionally and waiting as she admired certain flowers blooming. she tried hard not to be too flustered, and attempted to diffuse the palpable tension between them by talking about all sorts of things.
“oh, ryo! don't you think this flower is gorgeous?”
“hmm, yes. quite.”
“the weather is so pleasant for this time of year, isn't it?”
“yes it is.”
“look, the koi! aren’t they pretty?”
“for fish, sure.”
she gave up after that last attempt. it was obvious she wasn't going to get much out of sukuna today in terms of conversation – he seemed completely and utterly wound up.
they stopped underneath the shade of a tree, and she gracefully tucked in the layers of her clothes beneath her before sitting down. sukuna stood pensively beside the tree, his side profile solemn as he clenched and unclenched his fists. his movements were slow, methodical, almost like it was the only thing grounding him in that moment.
and then, in a flash, he was crouched right in front of her.
“i have something to say,” he announced, his voice like stone.
she swallowed thickly. “then say it.”
sukuna exhaled, and she heard the sound of his knuckles cracking and snapping before he continued, “i recognize that we two are… different in many ways. i have been bound to you from the moment i first laid eyes on you, and i will forever be yours.” – a sharp inhale followed by a shaky exhale – “however, while i may accept this, i understand that you might not outside the ties of marriage.”
this is it.
“you are the one good thing about my soul,” he whispered, his voice trembling with a vulnerable softness that shook her to her core. “please, say you will accept me?”
she didn’t hesitate for even a moment.
“i have always been yours, ryo, and i always will be.”
༺ ✤ ༻
love was infinite.
it transcended time and space, indifferent to who it dragged into its otherworldly domain, filled to the brim with whiteness and the saccharine scent of roses.
being ryomen sukuna’s wife meant crossing that threshold into another world, one that he had forced to turn into the brightest shade of red. his love was ferocious, nearly crippling in its intensity. loving him meant baring her heart to him, exposed and vulnerable, ready for him to consume it completely. he was a deprived man who had finally been given the key to her soul, and now he was able to come through and show her how deep his love for her coursed through in his veins.
“i want to bury myself into your skin,” he murmured into her ear, his arms wrapped around her bare body. “and settle into the spaces between your ribs.”
and yet, sukuna was tender too.
he would crave the moments of quiet, when it was just the two of them, whispering in the dark about how much she meant to him. wherever they were, a part of him was always touching her – whether it was his head on her shoulder as they sat in the garden, or pulling her onto his lap during her lessons. all the while, his eyes were memorising every little thing she did; the way she laughed, how she breathed, and every different sound and expression she made.
sukuna was immensely proud to be her husband, always devoted to providing for and protecting her.
she never wanted for a single thing.
and yet, he was still larger than life, a force of strife and bloodlust.
she knew what sort of reputation he had, that he was something of a living legend. there was no doubt that history would remember his name, spitting on it and sending shivers down people's spines at the mere mention of it.
“the king of curses,” uraume revealed to her one day, a hint of pride in her voice. “that is what the sorcerers call him.”
and that title did not come without a challenge.
on an unassuming autumn morning, sukuna abruptly interrupted one of her lessons. “i must go,” he said abruptly, clutching his trident like a god of old, a hint of glee in his words. “the fushigawa clan must be brought to heel.”
and heel they must have.
for when he returned, sukuna's face had split into two, with a mouth comfortably situated at his midriff. she knew then that unspeakable atrocities must have been committed, because her husband’s body did not evolve unless he had killed and sinned in the most horrific ways possible.
sukuna averted his gaze from her, his skin drenched in blood that was not his own. `'you cannot love me like this."
“and yet,” she whispered, standing on her toes and cupping his bloodied cheekbones. “i still do.”
she had never expected his true nature to change once they were married. to deny it was to deny him – and his love for her. as long as he kept her far from the sight of it, what more could she ask for?
in those moments, it was easy to forget how quickly darkness could overwhelm a fire.
the twilight moon cast a gentle light as a pleasant breeze wafted through the air, brushing against her cheek in a tender caress. it was one of those quiet, soft evenings, where the world slowed down just enough for husband and wife to savor each other’s company. they sat by the koi pond, watching as the silk ribbons of gold and white fins traced elegant patterns in the water. sukuna’s head rested on her lap, a pair of his eyes closed, as she gently stroked his hair.
nothing was out of the ordinary.
save for the strange man with starlight hair strolling towards them.
her husband sat up, and they both turned to watch the man approach them. the stranger carried the aura of a man assured in his own destiny, radiating confidence in the self-righteousness of the path he was on. when he lifted his head and met her gaze, she couldn’t help but gasp at the sight of his eyes, which held a beauty that well surpassed even that of the heavens above.
she knew then that this was no normal man.
“you were stupid to come here,” sukuna huffed, barely sparing the man a glance as he helped her to her feet. “i prefer not to kill in front of my wife.”
“and yet, you will die all the same,” the man retorted, his hand glowing with a threatening iridescent aquamarine light.
boom!
there was a deafening thunderclap, followed by the loud creaking and crashing of tumbling wood. before she could blink again, she found herself somewhere far from their home, surrounded by trees and nature that seemed to stretch for miles. her husband’s expression was calm, a perfectly still lake amidst the tumultuous whirlwind of emotions inside her.
sukuna softly touched her cheek. “this will all be over soon, my love.”
he pressed a tender kiss to her brow.
don’t leave me, please.
and then, he was gone.
a strong fear settled in the pit of her stomach amidst the eerie silence. she flinched each time the sky lit up in hues of red and blue, once with purple, and she could have sworn that she heard the sound of her husband’s untamed glee carried on the wind. every rustle of the trees set her teeth on edge, and she wrapped her arms tightly around herself as the coldness of the night began to settle in.
snap!
she whirled around.
another stranger emerged, this time with hair as black as the night. shadows pooled beneath his feet, ominous snarling and snapping noises of hounds coming from its depths. with a sharp gesture, the man hushed and silenced the shadows, and the hounds ceased to be. he tilted his head curiously at her, as if he couldn’t fathom why she was here alone in this place.
but what struck her about him were his eyes — they were as green as the forests in the mountains.
it made her strangely homesick.
“my husband will never stop hunting you for this,” she finally said coolly, despite the terror coursing in her blood.
“you think that terrifies me?” he scoffed, instantly shattering the image of warmth she thought he had. “no matter what, history will forever remember as the sorcerers who brought the king of curses to his knees.”
a silver blade gleamed wickedly as the man grinned maliciously.
“meanwhile, you are irrelevant.”
she didn't say a word, understanding all to well what was about to happen and why.
would death be kind?
she shook her head, turning away from the man and looking up at the crimson twilight sky, unwilling to face the man or the cruel blade that was to be her end.
(a drop of blood in a firestorm, a scream of agony)
it doesn’t matter, so long as sukuna cannot feel it.
༺ ✤ ༻
death was abysmally cruel.
ryomen sukuna once believed that it would have given him the sweet relief he always craved deep down – something that would have finally extinguished the ceaseless fire blazing in his veins. it was a release he had always longed for, yearned for, and thought he had always been ready for.
especially when the curse, kenjaku, found him suffering amidst the wreckage of his vengeful rampage for the love that had been stolen from him.
“you had your chance, once,” the curse purred, his forehead stitches starkly contrasting with the pallor of the body he had taken. “but you knew that already.”
no, death had hurt him beyond measure.
it was a hailstorm of ice and sleet, beating down at him, surely dousing his fire, but so very slowly. even though his memory now was hazy at the best of times, he would always remember that pain. how he smashed and ground his teeth together, silent as stone as kenjaku worked to preserve his essence into every one of his fingers, because he refused to cry again.
all sukuna could remember was pain.
and her.
he would always remember her – the pain of loving her, and the pain of losing her.
and how he cried for the first and last time when he saw her crumpled body lying there in that forest. how he wanted nothing more than to hold her bones in his arms for the rest of time, to die right there and then with her, and let their skeletons be burned into ash together.
love had made him sick with desire, with hate, with yearning.
it terrified him.
because ryomen sukuna did not like to feel.
he then swore to himself that he would never repeat his mistakes. love was never to be touched again, and he would burn the world before it had the chance to hurt him once more.
and finally, here sukuna was, reborn and made anew, ready to enact that vow.
only, he hadn’t planned on being stuck inside this miserable, pretentious annoying brat.
no matter, this isn’t permanent.
“how you feelin there, yuji?” asked satoru gojo in an irritatingly perky voice.
sukuna’s vessel rubbed his chest tentatively. “i guess it kinda hurts a litt- ow! okay, never mind, it hurts a lot.”
satoru smiled. “well, lucky for you, i know someone who can help with that.”
sukuna rolled his eyes, grumbling under his breath. oh, how he wanted to rip the smirk right off his face.
first, i’ll tear you–
a light laugh trickled in from just outside the door.
sukuna froze.
he knew that laugh.
the brat turned around, and through him, ryomen sukuna saw what he had thought he lost a millennium ago.
for a moment, there was nothing but white noise.
sukuna was entranced, captivated by the way her lips moved, the graceful way her figure leaned against the doorframe, and how every single feature of her face had remained unchanged and untouched despite all the time that had passed.
is this some sort of joke?
“ok yuji,” she said warmly, a kind smile on her face as she placed a hand on his chest. “this won’t hurt a bit.”
sukuna felt the ghost of her hand touching his own skin, familiar and warm, and he gripped his throne of bones tightly.
yuji frowned. “will it hurt you?”
“oh no, don’t worry about me. i can absorb as much physical pain as i want without feeling any of it myself.”
“that’s so cool! but, do you really not feel anything at all?”
she bit her lip, an ancient sadness in her young eyes. “well… sometimes i go blind for a while, and all i can see is the color red.”
“what? hell no, what if you go blind because of me? no way.”
yuji shied away from her touch, and she reached out to grasp his hand.
“no, i promise i won’t!” she practically begged. “please. yuji. i–something happens when i go blind, like something is trying to show me what’s missing inside me, and i need to find out what it is.”
so, you don’t remember a thing.
sukuna leaned forward, bones crunching beneath him.
“okay…” his vessel answered, apprehension and concern woven into his tone.
she smiled gratefully.
i think i understand what you were to me after all this time, my love.
༺ ✤ ༻
©storiesoflilies 2024, all rights reserved. please do not plagiarize, translate, or repost any of my work on other sites! i only post on ao3 and tumblr.
#sukuna x y/n#sukuna x you#ryomen sukuna x reader#sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna#sukuna#jjk ryomen#jjk oneshot#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x you#jjk x reader#sukuna angst#sukuna fluff#jjk fluff#jjk angst#jjk fanfic#ryomen x reader#jujutsu kaisen ryomen#ryomen x you#✍🏼 lily’s requests#fics for gaza#jjk fic#sukuna fic#heian sukuna#heian era sukuna
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If Anything, I Find it Educative (Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader)
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Author Masterlist
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Part 1: If Anything I Find It Educative
Part 2: It Was Horrible Until It Wasn’t
Part 3: Douchebag Falls Short in This Case
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Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader.
Summary: Spencer is not happy attending the annual FBI Gala this year. Having to socialize with a woman who only wants to seduce him makes it worse. But one not-so-fortunate incident could improve his night somehow.
Word Count: 6.8k
Warnings: Awkward Spencer. Morgan is stubborn about Spencer getting 'game.' Spencer spills facts about seafood (oysters), human biting, and cheating. Mention to Spencer's dick (only a phrase). Someone choking on food is described. A toxic relationship and job insecurities are described too. If I forgot something, let me know.
A/N: Okay, people. This is kind of an experiment: I want to know how you think the relationship between Spencer and Reader might evolve (if it evolves at all). Good friends? Romantic relationship rom-com style? An angsty romantic relationship? Friends to lovers? Just lovers? What important things do you imagine could happen to them? (canon or not). What could be the Reader's whole back story?
This is just a one-shot, but I am considering continuing it based on your thoughts and suggestions.
Part 2
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Spencer's POV
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There are few things I hate more than being surrounded by many people at an event. Standing in the middle of a crowded party dressed in formal attire is one of them.
It is an uncomfortable occasion highlighted by uncomfortable clothes.
And this time, it's Hotch's fault.
Tonight, I should have been at home, wrapped in a cozy blanket and enjoying my new edition of War and Peace. But the annual FBI gala and Hotch's adamant request blew my plans.
"Strauss wants to see the whole team at the venue this year. And we are in a very thin line with her to ignore her wishes."
No one seemed conflicted with the idea of attending this fancy party. Even some of my teammates looked excited about it. While JJ and Garcia chatted animatedly for days about what dress they would choose, Morgan saw it as a chance to get to know the new female agents working at Counterterrorism. Rossi only wanted to know how good the scotch would be this year, and Prentiss took it as an excuse to have free drinks. For his part, Hotch seemed as calm as any day at work.
But me? I wasn't excited at all.
Reluctantly, I purchased a tuxedo for the gala. At first, I thought about renting one since I would hardly use it again. But my germophobic self made me think again, and I decided the expense would at least make me feel less uncomfortable.
Keyword: a little less uncomfortable.
Now, I'm standing at the entrance, scanning the venue, searching for a familiar face. The place is packed with agents from all divisions and their plus ones, so it's hard to find anything at all.
But a familiar voice pulls me from my struggle.
"Boy genius! Over here!"
Penelope is calling my name from a table in the corner. As my gaze lands on her, I can see Morgan, Emily, JJ, and Hotch there too.
A sigh of relief escapes my lips, and quickly, I stroll where my teammates are.
"Spence! You made it!" JJ greets me as I pull a chair next to Morgan to sit.
"We thought you weren't coming," Emily added before sipping her drink.
"I understood it was a requirement," I quipped, looking at Hotch. The aforementioned man nodded in agreement.
"It was, indeed. Have I to remind you Strauss is still mad about the whole ordeal with you stepping into a building with no vest and no gun?"
Hotch is right. Strauss made his life hell for a whole week until he notified my suspension.
I wince, remembering the incident in question.
Self-note: don't leave behind the vest and the gun again.
"You look very handsome, boy wonder," Garcia chimes, waving her hand and pointing at me.
I can't help but blush at the compliment. It's not she hasn't done it before, and I know she means well, but-
"Maybe pretty boy gets some game tonight," Morgan claps his hand on my shoulder, grinning.
That's why I don't like that kind of attention. At every chance, someone pips up and tries to play wingman or wingwoman for me. And although I appreciate their efforts, I like to move at my own pace. Even if some say my pace, it's more like a turtle's speed.
Giving him a tight-lip smile, I reach for a glass of water. I don't know how I'll survive this night.
Surprisingly, it is okay for now. I fall into conversation with Garcia and JJ, although it is more like me listening and them talking. Occasionally, I add some to the topic, and they seem receptive.
But Derek looks impatient to stand and march to a group of women talking on the opposite side of the venue, next to the bar. I don't look much into it until I feel his hand on my shoulder.
"You're oddly quiet tonight, pretty boy. What's up?" My sight darts from JJ and Penelope to Derek.
"Nothing?" I offer. My eyebrows creace. Derek snickers.
"I know what you need! Come on, let's enjoy the party and come with me to chat with those beautiful agents at the bar over there," he proposes. I shake my head.
"No. I'm good. You can go if you want. I don't think you need my help."
Derek rolls his eyes.
"Don't get dismissive with me. It'll help you to lose a little. I promise," he insists. And I know I'm losing my battle with him tonight.
"As if I had something interesting to say to them," I mumble, loud enough for Derek to hear.
"Don't say that. Surely, some would like to hear about, I don't know, oysters? And how they became a symbol of glamor or whatever. Because I'm sure you know that, right?" Derek points, grabbing an oyster from the tray a waiter offers him.
"Actually, oysters were not considered a status symbol until the 11th century, when the Crusades trunked access to seafood in Europe. Some researchers believe that-"
I'm about to explain the whole thing when Morgan cuts me off.
"See? Now, don't waste that knowledge with me, and let's share it with those gorgeous, shall we?"
I'm screwed.
I reluctantly stand to follow Derek. I know he's the best intention even if I won't tell him that. Maybe he's right, and I need to step out of my comfort zone occasionally.
As smoothly as only Morgan can be, he interrupts the conversation between three women by the bar. You would think they would return annoyed looks from the sudden interruption, but they did not. It is everything but that.
"Excuse me, beautiful ladies. Hope you don't mind some company. My friend and I thought it would be an honor to share part of your precious time tonight."
How the fuck can he do that?!
The result shocked me almost more than it impressed me. The three turn to us with flirting smiles flashing to Derek. And me?
That's new. And, of course, I have to blush furiously at that.
"Hey, handsome. Sweet talk, uh?" One of the girls teases Derek while the others giggle.
"I know I can do better, but you make me nervous, sweetheart," Morgan banters as smoothly as the beginning.
And that's it. We have their full attention now. Scratch that; Derek has their full attention now.
He asks for their names, and that's how I know the woman who spoke first is Vivian, and her friends are Julie and Ashley. The three of them work in the Counterterrorism Division.
"And who is your good-looking friend?" Ashley asks, skimming at me.
Why is she looking at me from head to toe?
Derek glances at me, and I understand it's time for me to say something.
"I'm Spencer," I wave.
Short and precise.
"Hi, Spencer. You are cute," Ashley points, and suddenly, my mouth goes dry.
As Emily once said, my IQ slashes to 60 when I'm in front of a beautiful woman. And Ashley is a beautiful woman. Her long, stylish blond hair, blue eyes, tan skin with perfect makeup, gorgeous smile, and a dress that accentuates her body in the right places. It would be stupid to say she is not attractive.
"Why don't we go to the dance floor while Ashley and Spencer get to know each other better, uh?" Derek offers to Julie and Vivian, winking at me.
Oh, Lord. Help me.
I don't think Derek or Ashley would appreciate it if I refused to stay here and run to the nearest exit. So I give Ashley a tight smile and prepare myself for whatever comes now.
"Well...?" she prompts, and I don't know what the fuck she expects me to say.
"Yeah. Nice party," I offer, hoping my attempt to small talk works.
Ashley's smile suggests it does.
"It is. Are you having fun?"
No.
"Yes! A lot! Are you?"
"Yeah. But I think it turns out better now," she says, subtly closing some distance between us with a playful look directed at me.
Is she flirting with me?
I clear my throat to appease some of my nerves. I need to cool off. If Derek can do this, I should try.
A waitress approaches us and offers some drinks. Ashley picks a glass of wine, and I prefer a flute of champagne. I don't usually drink alcohol, but I need it now.
"Slow down, boy. People would think I make you nervous," Ashley points seductively when she notices how I quickly down the liquid.
My eyes widen when she rests a hand on my chest and leans to whisper in my ear.
"I don't bite. Unless you want me to."
Okay. That sounds very straightforward.
I should feel flattered. An attractive woman is more than insinuating me right now; I barely said anything. But it doesn't feel like that.
Derek surely would tell me, 'Take it and play it, pretty boy,' but I don't feel like it. If we could engage in a kind of conversation, I would feel more comfortable. Don't get me wrong. I know what a potential one-night stand means, but I'm not good at it. That's how I am. Sue me.
I want to turn her down gently, so I do what I know to do, and people usually hate me for it: spit information.
"Compared with other mammals, like dogs and bears, humans don't have the strongest bite. Scientists measure the pressure exerted by an animal's bite in pounds per square inch or psi. The human bite force is 162 psi. The bite force of some dogs can reach 250 psi, while some bears have a bite force of over 1,000 psi. It's interesting, actually-"
Ashley is now looking at me, confused. She retreats his hand from my chest and hums, faking interest in what I'm saying.
As I go on with my info dump, I notice how Ashley changes her empty glass of wine to a filled one when a server offers it.
Aside from 'interesting,' 'oh,' and 'uhm,' she doesn't add more to the conversation - or more likely, my rambling - and by now, you would think she's tired of me. But no. For God knows what reason, she is persistent. I give her that.
Typically, I can ramble on and on, which is not the exception. The waiters and waitresses keep coming with drinks and food, and even I pick some for myself.
When they offer us a tray with oysters, I can't help but recall what Morgan told me before.
As I see Ashley ushering one to her mouth, I deliver an exciting fact about it.
"Did you know that raw oysters are still alive? Indeed, some people argue oysters might feel pain, and others say that because they don't have a central nervous system, they don't feel pain like other seafood species might."
Not looking at her, I focus on my oyster, inspecting it before continuing.
"If it's that so, the question is when they die actually. This is likely to happen when they are shucked rather than when they are chewed or swallowed. Scientists think this because an oyster's heart is right next to the bottom adductor muscle, so separating it from the shell kills it."
I should have known the lack of response wasn't due to the interest in the topic, although speaking was impossible for her. Her face's blueness and her hand on her neck now tell me something is wrong.
Fuck. She is choking.
I don't know what to do. She is choking on an oyster, and I'm paralyzed. The people around us start to scream as they see her turning blue. That picks everyone's attention, and I want to dig a hole to get into right now. But first, I should do something to help her. Before I can reach for her, a pair of arms hugs Ashley from behind and applies the Heimlich Maneuver. After a few thrusts into the abdominal area, we see the oyster fly from her mouth to somewhere on the floor.
At the same time, Vivian, Julie, and Derek rush to us to find out what is going on.
Ashley starts coughing, and some of her natural color returns to her face. The arms around her torso loosen, and that's when I notice the woman who just saved her life from choking.
Everything happens so fast that I barely register the slap across my face—Ashley's courtesy.
A collective 'Uhhh' is heard around us.
Before I can say anything, Ashley starts a rant full of anger and frustration toward me.
"Are you fucking crazy? Why would you say something like that? It's disgusting!"
Ironically, I'm speechless now.
What is wrong with talking about oysters?
"You fucking weird!" Ashley continues with her rant. It's like she has been holding it since we were left alone.
The woman who helped Ashley now looks between me and her with her eyebrow creased.
"Hey. You should take it easy. You're just recovering from-"
She can't finish the sentence since Ashley turned to lash out at her.
"Don't fucking tell me what to do! I almost died because of this pathetic nerd here who can't stop rambling about alive oysters! Just thinking about it makes me sick again!"
"Could it be a hint for not eating them anymore?" I muse, gaining a chuckle from the woman - let's call her the savior - and a deadly glare from Ashley. I recoil from saying anything else, and it is the wiser.
"I should have known better than to engage my time with you. Even if you actually pack a big dick, it doesn't worth it!" she whisper-yell at me, but loud enough for Derek, Vivian, Julie, and the mystery-savior woman to hear.
I'm utterly confused and embarrassed. What have to do my dick with all of this?
Derek is now dispersing the crowd around us as Vivian and Julie try to soothe her friend's anger, rubbing her back and arm.
I bet they see Ashley's wrath boiling and the high probability of her launching towards me to punch me. Their efforts to subdue her seem to work because, after a loud huff, Ashley only grabs her coat from Vivian's hand and spits at me: "Thanks for ruining my night!"
The three pass by my side to one of the exits venue.
I don't even know how I should feel.
I feel upset because my escape plan didn't go as planned. I feel relieved because Ashley didn't die. Hurt? Yeah, that, too. I didn't deserve a slap on my face. She calling me a pathetic nerd? Sadly, I'm not surprised. And it only confirms my theory I'm not good at this kind of setting.
With the show over and people not focused on me anymore, Derek approaches. I know what he wants to say, but I don't want to hear it. I'm done for tonight.
"Don't say it," I cut him off.
"I wasn't gonna say anything," he tells me with a sympathetic look, holding his hands up in surrender.
"Sure you not," I grumble. "And what was about that comment about my… dick?" I whisper to him.
Derek's face tries to remain neutral, but I know him better.
"What did you do?" I demand to Morgan, and he sighs.
"I may or may not have suggested a rumor about your attributes."
I look at him in disbelief.
"Shut the fuck up! You did not!"
"Come on, pretty boy. It worked! You caught their attention, didn't you?"
I shake my head, trying not to snap at him in public. Morgan can see the distress I'm carrying right now and relents.
"I'm sorry, Reid. I thought it would be a good chance for you to show yourself around. You're a good kid; you deserve to have a good time."
It's useless to engage in this argument again. I understand his good intentions, but like this? No, thanks.
"I better get going," I mumble, walking backward. I'm done for the night.
"Reid..." Morgan starts, but the shake of my head cuts him off. He sighs as I turn to head to one of the exits.
Walking through one of the venue's doors, I find myself on a lateral terrace. I stop for a moment to look around.
If there were different circumstances, I would be enjoying this view. To the front, you can see a beautiful and thick green shrubbery. Several fountains with little waterfalls and statues recreate a neoclassical garden. It is no coincidence since the property where the venue is located is a typical Jefferson's Neo-Palladian construction with high ceilings and large columns.
My architectural appreciation stops when my eyes land on a woman with her back leaning against one of the columns, her left hand resting on the concrete railing, and her right hand with a glass of wine. Her face is turned to the side, and she is observing the beautiful garden in front of her.
I know her. I've seen her before.
Although it is dark outside, the light from the venue's long windows illuminates the terrace enough.
My brain comes up with the answer in a fraction of a second.
Is the woman who saved Ashley from choking.
After what she did, nobody even thanked her. The worst part is knowing Ashley behaved that poorly with her. It's not fair. And it's my fault.
With that in mind, I approach her.
She seems too concentrated to register I'm just a foot of distance from her. I clear my throat to call her attention.
She turns her head with a confused look at first. But she offered me a kind smile when she realized who I was.
It's my first chance to look at her; with everything happening so fast, I barely noticed her trying to talk back to Ashley moments ago.
And now that I'm in front of her, I feel weirdly struck.
Besides her beautiful smile, her eyes hold a piercing gaze, but not the kind that frightens you. It's more like she actually sees you and gives you her undivided attention. With light makeup, her face lets you see some of her freckles. With her hair tied to one side, you can see her neck adorned with a simple gold chain with a compass-shaped pendant.
My not-so-subtle scrutiny is interrupted by her voice.
"Can I help you?" She asks, and my cheeks turn pink. But I'm here for a reason, so I clear my throat before speaking.
"Sorry. I - uh. I'm sorry for bothering you, but I wanted to thank you. For what you did back there," I say, pointing to the inside. "And, well, I want to apologize too. Ashley wasn't very kind to you, considering you mostly saved her life."
She tilts her head slightly, a frown forming, while contemplating what to say.
"Well," she starts. "I'll take the thanks. But I can't take the apologies."
Now, it's my turn to frown.
"Oh, okay. Uh - Why not?"
Not that she should do it. It's her right to do it or not, but I'm curious.
"Because you didn't do anything wrong to me, so you don't have to," she shrugs, like it's obvious.
"I kind of did. I mean, Ashley behaved awful, and I didn't -"
Before I can continue, she shakes her head to stop me.
"No. Don't do that. Why on earth do you want to apologize for someone else's bad manners, considering she treated you like garbage?"
She doesn't say it as if she is upset at me, more likely as if she doesn't understand why I would do that. And yes, she has a good point. But someone has to do the right thing, and that's what I say next.
"It's just the right thing to do."
She takes her time, mulling over my words and whether she believes me or not.
"Okay. You're correct. It's the right to do. And it's a shame most people don't do it. But I still believe it is not your responsibility here."
Something is telling me her statement concerns more than Ashley being impolite. But it is not my place to point that.
"But some people do. And that must count as something, I guess. "
It's curious how her look changes from pensive to more light-hearted.
"Okay. You win this time..." she trails off, not knowing how to refer to me.
"Spencer," I supply. She hums.
"You win this time, Spencer. And being that said, I accept your apology too," she added, sipping the remaining wine from her glass.
I smile, nodding appreciatively. It's a little gesture, but I feel better after what happened.
Silence settles between us, and I take that as my cue to leave. I had already taken enough of her time.
"Uh, well. Thank you again..."
I trail off, realizing I don't know her name.
"(Y/N)," she says.
"Thank you again, (Y/N). Hope you enjoy the rest of your night."
With that said, I should get on foot to leave the venue, as I had planned to do ten minutes ago, but for some reason, my feet didn't want to move, and I kept standing there. (Y/N) look at me as if I'm going to say something else due to the lack of movement on my part.
"Are you okay?" she asks, and now I have the same question for myself.
"Yeah. Yeah. Totally okay. Sorry, I'm leaving now."
Turning in my heels, I'm about to walk away when I hear (Y/N) 's voice.
"I didn't know that, you know? And, for the record, I didn't think it was disgusting."
I stop in my tracks to look at her with a raised eyebrow. When I catch what she is referring to, my eyes cast to the floor, and my cheeks turn pink again.
"If anything, I found it educative," she adds. I try to decipher if there is some teasing in her words, but I find none. She's being oddly genuine. Oddly, because I'm not used to people saying that when referring to the things I tend to ramble about.
"Thank you," I sheepishly say, my hands finding home in my pant pockets. "People don't tell me that very often."
A puff leaves (Y/N) 's lips before she says, "Ungrateful fuckers."
I chuckle at her choice of words.
Weird. It's the first time all night that I don't want to run away from here.
"Yeah. Something like that," I agree, and she smiles. Now I'm comfortable enough to make some conversation.
"Uh, are you from Quantico?"
"Yeah. A very adrenalinal position," she prompts, and I raise an eyebrow. "Finance Division."
I can't help but snort, and she laughs. "I told you. What about you?"
"Behavioral Unit Analysis," I reply. (Y/N)' s eyes wide in recognition.
"Wow. The one and only BAU."
"You know us?"
"Sure. I wouldn't forget a unit that has its own jet. I'm the one who enters the travel expenses from all Quantico," she explains. I hum, trying to figure out the amplitude of that sole task. "Like I told you, very exciting."
She is mocking herself regarding her job. But I find it impressive for a desk job. Not all people have the skills to run financials.
"Well, I agree it is not very adrenaline but very important. I mean, we have to travel around the country all the time. Our job depends on traveling."
(Y/N) has now an amused expression on her face.
"It's nice to know someone truly values what you do. Not even our boss does it," she points before letting a deep sigh escape from her lips. "Gosh, I'm being very judgmental right now. You're going to think I spend my life complaining about everything. I do sometimes, but I'm not always like this," she explains. I shake my head.
"I'm not judging you. Everyone has the right to say what things don't like or would change about their jobs."
"Well, thanks. Although I'm sure you guys have more reasons to be concerned. You risk your life on the field every time. That's huge."
She rests the empty glass on the concrete rail, adjusting her coat around her body. The air is chiller at this time of the night.
"You know? People say that a lot. And I agree. It's a dangerous job, but it's not better than anyone's for that reason, or whatever another reason for that matter.
Her eyes are analyzing me with curiosity. I'm not sure, but it's like she's having difficulty believing what I'm saying.
"Can I ask you something, Spencer?"
"Sure."
"Why are you here tonight?"
My eyes narrow at her question. Isn't the reason obvious?
"What do you mean? It's the FBI annual gala," I point out, knowing she already knows that too. She nods.
"Precisely," she starts. "And at the risk of being impertinent, I can say this environment makes you uncomfortable. When you were with that girl talking - scratch that, when you were talking, and she looked at you, trying to devour you with her eyes - you seemed like you didn't want to be there. Above all, knowing this kind of event is basically to show off to other bureau agents, I don't think is your notion of an ideal night."
If I wasn't impressed when we started talking - which I was - I am now.
She assumes my awe as discomfort.
"I'm sorry. I didn't want to overstep."
"No, no. You are okay. And let me tell you, your observation is completely accurate," I hasten to clarify.
"Yeah?" (Y/N) asks, and I nod earnestly.
"Yeah. Have you not considered applying for a position as a field agent?"
An amused laugh leaves her lips.
"No way! I would be a total disaster! And carrying a gun is not my idea of a dream job anymore," she points out, still laughing.
I chuckle, but her answer makes me think. Before I can ask for clarification, she calls me out.
"Hey, you didn't answer my question."
I didn't, although the answer is simple.
"My boss made me."
(Y/N) scoff in disbelief.
"What? Did he put a gun against your chest?"
Well, thinking better about it, maybe the answer is not that simple.
"Not quite, but you can say I felt it that way."
I tell (Y/N) how my team always worries about my lack of social interaction, which isn't that accurate if you ask me. However, some of the pressure of doing things that people my age would generally do is finally getting me and pushing me out of my comfort zone.
She listens to me with undivided attention and seems to understand what I'm talking about.
"Peer pressure, uh? I can relate to that to some extent," she agrees.
"That's why are you here tonight, too?"
My question makes her let out a deep sigh as her eyes focus on the garden beside us for a second.
"Not really. Who knows, maybe I do enjoy being here?"
(Y/N) phrases it more like a question than a statement. And I can tell she doesn't believe it either.
"Enjoying being apart from the crowd, in a lateral terrace barely illuminated and exposed to the chilly night air? I can think of several other places to do the same thing without the trouble of a gala environment."
Her cheeks turn a shade of pink, which tells me I'm right.
"Not fair, you are a certified profiler," (Y/N) complains, faking annoyance.
"And you haven't answered my question either," I remind her. She rolls her eyes playfully.
"Yeah, yeah. I know. Well, let's say I came here to prove myself something. Spoiler alert: I failed. That's why I have been mostly spending the night here."
I hum, knowing she is vague in explaining, but I'm not in a place to pry.
"Look, I would tell you more about it, but I'm sure you have to return inside. Your teammates are surely wondering where you are."
I can't help but snort, and she raises an eyebrow at my reaction.
"I'm sorry, but your assumption is far from reality. Considering what happened inside, they think I ran home. What I was actually doing before spotting you here," I admit.
"Ha! So it's true I'm holding you back but for a different motive," she triumphantly concludes.
"I didn't say that!" I complain with a hint of exasperation, to which she breathly laughs.
"I know. I know. I'm messing with you. Honestly? There are two reasons why I'm avoiding this topic right now. First, I don't think you want to hear the mess my life is these days, and second, I would kill for a coffee and a sandwich-" she pauses, stifling a chuckle before continuing. "Considering oysters are out of the table."
"Oh, come on!" I groan, seeing how she falls into a fit of laughter, so contagious that I can't help but join her.
"Sorry, sorry. Not very kind of me, I know. But I couldn't help it," she apologizes, still giggling. I bit my lower lip in amusement.
"Alright. It's okay. It's frankly funny," I admit, my words leaving my mouth before I can think of them. "Well, I could tell you more of those moments in my life - many of them - if you let me join you with the coffee and sandwich. I know a good place that is open at this hour. And you can tell me what kind of thing you wanted to prove yourself tonight."
Spencer Reid. Is that you?
I'm surprised by my sudden confidence, and it seems (Y/N) is, too. She hums, scrubbing her fingers under her chin while contemplating my offer.
"Okay, I'll take it. But don't tell me later that I didn't warn you about the mess of my life," she points her index finger at me.
"I won't. I promise."
-
Grabbing a cab is relatively easy since the FBI considered transportation outside the venue for people who won't be driving.
The fifteen-minute ride allows us to have a light conversation. That's how I know (Y/N) has been in the bureau for almost four years. Being an Accountant by profession and with a Master of Science in Finance from Georgetown, she was recruited for the FBI precisely considering her outstanding skills in the financial department.
She asks me about my trajectory in the FBI as well. I tell her about Gideon and the start of my life at the BAU.
Arriving at our destination, I insist on paying for the ride despite her resistance. I assured her that she could invite me to the coffee.
It must be a curious image for the patrons to see two fully gala-dressed people stepping inside a diner at eleven pm.
We sit on a bench facing each other.
A girl who can't hide her curious expression comes to take our order. As promised, (Y/N) asks for two coffees and two sandwiches.
"So, Agent Gideon recruited you for the FBI. Why did you accept? I would have thought you would be more comfortable in academics," (Y/N) asks, stirring a spoon of sugar in her coffee.
"I thought the same at the time. But Gideon saw something I didn't. He knew I wouldn't settle with learning and teaching for the rest of my life, and I needed it to be useful beyond that environment."
I explain how profiling has helped us to catch unsubs around the country and how worthy it is for me. I can't think of myself doing anything else. (Y/N) listen to me with raptor interest; it is nice to be heard that way.
"You know? I haven't heard someone speak passionately about their work in a long time. It's good you feel that way," she says with a hint of longing that doesn't go unnoticed by me.
"It is bold of me to assume you don't like what you do?"
Maybe I'm overstepping, but I'm curious. And (Y/N) doesn't seem bothered by my question. Shifting in her seat, she leans, resting her elbows on the table.
"Not bold at all, mister profiler," she teases. "But not always has been that way. I would say I started to feel uncomfortable not long ago. A couple of months, perhaps?"
I hum, thinking about what could have made her feel that way.
"It has to do with why you were at the gala tonight?"
She chuckles, nodding.
"Kind of. Remember I told you I wanted to prove myself something? Well, it has to do with what has been bothering me," she prefaces.
(Y/N) relates how things have gone well since she got into the FBI. She felt respected, wanting to do many things and learn everything she could.
That's how she met her boyfriend.
"I wasn't looking for a romantic relationship, much less at work. I wanted to be professional, separating my private life from my job. But he was so attentive and supportive. He always told me he was happy I felt fulfilled with what I was doing. He was so perfect I thought I had found my soulmate."
I don't know exactly where she is going, but sure as hell, that prick wasn't her soulmate.
"What happened?"
"One day, I wasn't good enough for him anymore. After two years of relationship, he started with harsh comments and criticism about everything I did and didn't do."
A humorless chuckle escapes her lips.
"I should have noticed. By then, he was promoted from desk duty and junior trainee to field agent. He had always wanted it, and I felt so happy for him. But that changed everything."
(Y/N) tells me about how her boyfriend stopped listening to her, and instead, every topic of conversation turned to his job, implying - sometimes saying it explicitly - that it was more important than hers.
"It's not only the fact we stopped communicating; it was realizing how low he thought about me and my accomplishments. At first, I tried to understand. Of course, he was dazed by this new life, full of danger and adrenaline. I could understand it. But when he started comparing me to his female colleagues and the things they were doing, way more important than the ones I was doing, it made me insecure."
(Y/N) takes time to collect her thoughts, sipping the remaining coffee from the cup.
"The insecurities got the best of me. At some point, I just wanted to run away and leave it all behind. I knew it was irrational, but I believed him. I even thought about changing my career and training to be a field agent. Good thing we broke up before I could do that," she admits.
"What stopped you? I mean, like you're telling this, you were going to change for him," I ask. She cast her gaze, averting mine. Her cheeks turn pink.
"I don't like to admit it, but the reason we broke up wasn't because I realized how stupid the situation was. We broke up because he cheated on me. I discovered it two months ago, breaking the camel's back."
Fuck. That prick was not meant to be her soulmate. And I feel the urge to have one or two words with him right now.
"I'm sorry." It's the only thing I manage to say. (Y/N) shakes her head.
"Nah. If anything, I'm glad it happened. Even if it broke my heart."
"He was at the gala, right?" (Y/N) nods.
"With the coworker that he chose to cheat on me. His current girlfriend."
Everything makes perfect sense now. (Y/N) was trying to prove to herself that the wound had healed. And from what she said earlier, it didn't turn that way.
She bitterly chuckles.
"Yeah. It's pathetic, I know."
Spencer, do something.
"No! It's not. Unfortunately, cheating is not uncommon, particularly in men. In 2020, IFS released a report stating that 20% of men have admitted to cheating, and only 10% have. In 2021, the Health Testing Centers asked 441 people who admitted infidelity to their partners and asked how long it took for them to tell their partners about it. 47.7% of the respondents told their partner within a week that they'd cheated. 26.6% of those have waited for a month, and 25.7% took six months or longer to tell their partner about the infidelity. And 60% of them said the affair started in a work environment."
And then again, the rambling. But instead of giving me a blank look, (Y/N) seems to consider what I just said.
"Maybe I shouldn't feel so bad about it then. Anyway, it hasn't been easy to get out of this. I thought going to the gala and forcing myself to see them together would be enough to get a closure," she reflects.
"But it still hurts," I supply, making (Y/N) hum.
"Yeah. I'm not ready, and it sucks. Not for him, but for me. I hate feeling so out of place, so dissatisfied with everything," (Y/N) retorts, leaning back and crossing her arms over her chest.
Her eyes look sad, and I want to do something to fix it, although I know that nothing I can say would be enough. Maybe joking will at least get her off the topic.
"And there I was talking about oysters all night," I sigh, feigning disapproval. Genuine laughter escapes her lips.
I didn't know that making her laugh could fill my heart so much with satisfaction.
"That's life," she adds, now checking the time on her cell phone. "I think I'll get going," she announces, collecting her things and preparing to stand.
"Can I walk you home? It's very late already," I ask.
"Oh no, don't worry about me. My building is not far from here."
I know she doesn't want to cause trouble, but it makes me uneasy about what could happen to her walking alone at this hour.
Thank you, BAU.
"Please?" I insist. (Y/N) raises an eyebrow.
"Aren't you already fed up with me?" she asks curiously.
"Non yet," I grin.
Not having the energy to put up a fight, she accepts my offer, and after paying the bill, we leave the restaurant.
The night is colder now, and both of us walk in silence with our hands in our pockets.
I can't know what exactly she's thinking, but at least I can't stop thinking about tonight. For someone like me, it's hard to fall into spontaneity, but with (Y/N), it wasn't a problem. That amazes me, and I like it at the same time.
When she stops walking, I get out of my thoughts.
"Here," she says, looking at the building we are standing by. "Thank you for walking with me," (Y/N) states, smiling. It's the same warm smile she offered when I found her on the venue's terrace a couple of hours ago.
"Of course. It's the less I could do."
And I mean it. She saved my night in so many ways she doesn't even know.
"Well, I need to say it was a pleasure to share this shit of a night with you and turned it less shitty," she says, grinning and satisfied with her remark.
I laugh at her statement. I couldn't have said it better.
"Thank you. It's the best compliment I have had in a long time," I joke, making (Y/N) giggle.
"You are welcome."
I have the question on the tip of my tongue. I would love to see her again, but what if she doesn't think it's worth it? I opt for the vaguest thing that comes to mind.
"See you around?"
(Y/N) thinks about it for a moment. Am I being too obvious? Before falling into a spiral, she smiles at me again.
"Yeah, sure. Why not."
I can't help but feel the excitement pouring from me.
"Great! Well, I - I'll go now. Good night (Y/N)," I say goodbye, slowly walking backward.
"Good night, Spencer," she retorts before entering the building.
I watch her disappear behind the door, and I think that while neither of us got what we wanted, maybe we got what we needed.
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Next -> Part 2: It Was Horrible Until It Wasn’t
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A/N 2: I'm excited to know your thoughts about this!
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Spencer Reid's Taglist: @dreatine @nomajdetective @jayyeahthatsme @rosalinasam2 @averyhotchner @lovelyxtom @princessmiaelicia @pastelbabygirl19 @reidsbookclub @alexxavicry @gspenc @spencerreidisbae123 @calmspencer @pauline5525mgg @anamiad00msday @milivanili99 @laylasbunbunny @leahblackk @miaxx03 @missabsey @taintedstranger @khxna @hiireadstuff @pleasantwitchgarden @dysphoricsanity
#spencer reid#criminal minds#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#dr spencer reid#amanda perry williams#aperrywilliams#spencer reid fic#spencer reid one shot
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Hey, so...
Have you all noticed *how* Crowley and Aziraphale are drinking in 1941? And by this I mean... that they barely are? <wink>
Crowley has been drinking for millennia by this point. He gets drunk as Bildad the Shuite in 2500 B.C.. Aziraphale has been drinking since sometime prior to the scene in Rome, which is also when we see them drink together for the first time. *This* scene is 1941 so countless years and meet ups between Crowley and Aziraphale have taken place since and considering how these two drink together in other situations-- like how completely wasted they were in the "eleven years ago" scene in S1-- this one here in 1941 is *interesting.* Why?
Because friends, that is *one bottle of wine* on the table beside Aziraphale and I can still see wine in it above the label, which means what's currently in their glasses is less than the first half of the bottle... which means the glasses they are sharing now that Aziraphale just poured are their first drinks of the evening... and neither of them are really drinking much of it. That signals an intent not to drink very much at all-- the open bottle probably being plenty for the two of them. They're going slowly, without an intention to get drunk, but not really just to savor together a particularly interesting vintage. They don't seem to be noticing or tasting the wine at all. Aziraphale poured them both a good amount but not overkill but both of them so far in this scene just take cautious, *small* sips of the wine... and they don't need to conserve it, ok?
It's not the war. It's canon that Aziraphale has a case of Chateauneuf-de-Pape that he picked up in the 1920s sitting in the back of this shop at this very minute that he doesn't bust open until "Eleven Years Ago" in the future of S1 and Crowley is a bootlegger in this moment in history lol and also they're both literally magic. They could miracle wine from halfway around the world if they wanted to. There's wine to drink if they want to get drunk...
...and they both have silently agreed that they don't want to.
It is the *only* time that they drink together in a scene that we've seen where they have a mutual agreement to not drink that much. Even when Aziraphale *didn't drink*, he still got *food* drunk while Crowley was drinking in the Job minisode.
But when they're having a drink together in 1941, both of them are very clearly, by a kind of unspoken agreement from the vibes in the room, *not really drinking.* Just a little. A few sips that will lead to a glass or two a piece total, at most-- that bottle split between them would be a lot from the air of and the pace of them in this scene.
And I mean... forgetting for a moment that Aziraphale will get drunk without issue in other scenes, we all know Crowley, right? This Crowley...
In S1, part of *God's narration* lol includes that Crowley and Aziraphale had been drinking for six straight hours in the bookshop together in "Eleven Years Ago." Rome is one thing because they had just had just met up so we don't know how sloshed they got over oysters at Petronius' new restaurant (and would seem likely that they did) but in every other scene when they drink together, basically, they drink quite a bit and both of them usually wind up drunk, especially Crowley.
So why is 1941 different?
Because they're drinking like people who both want to mess around, that's why.
Yeah, people mess around while drunk and I'm sure the same can be said for any of the few Effort-curious angels and demons outside of these two but Crowley and Aziraphale are not a casual hookup to one another-- they're in love, they're best friends, and they haven't been together before after literal millennia of pining and yearning for it. It's not something that's happening while they're drunk. They want to be sober and for it to be special and the evening here in 1941 has really got everything lining up for a perfectly romantic night, if they want it to be. All the rescuing one another and little glances and now Aziraphale's asked Crowley back to the bookshop for a late night drink and they're both drinking like they want it to be tonight.
They're both silently telling one another they want something to happen by the fact that they're drinking with no intention to get drunk. They want to be present. They want to remember. They want each other's explicit consent so they're barely drinking the wine so that it's evident that if things get intimate, it's not because either or both of them are drunk, and no one has to stop over concern over that.
Aziraphale is looking at Crowley looking all dashing, unusually quiet for him, maybe a bit nervous and still hiding a little behind his glasses-- Hell's biggest lush taking the world's smallest, barely-there sip of that wine lol-- and is like how many more tiny sips do we need to take before I can crawl onto his lap...?
Aziraphale's like omg, the sex is going to be amazing... thank God I don't yet know in this moment that something-- like some Zombie Nazis, probably-- will stop us and we'll still be on trying to kiss one another 80 years from now...
#ineffable husbands#good omens#crowley#aziraphale#crowley x aziraphale#aziraphale x crowley#good omens 2#good omens 1941#aziraphale kiss crowley in that damn hat before we all lose it already
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Here it is, Beatle People! The official 'Insane Things Paul Has Said About John' list, as created by the people of tumblr. I hope this is a useful supplement to the original McLennon iceberg
Sources under the cut:
“He was a very cool boy” (@javelinbk)
"Whenever other people do that it always reminds me of John" (@javelinbk)
"We put our names next to each other in our school exercise books" (@beatlepaul4ever)
When was Lennon at his best? "When he was asleep." (@didwemeetsomewherebefore)
"A delicious broth of a boy" (@zilabee)
"A lovely little baby, John was" (@mallowedheart)
"Daddy's room" (@pauls1967moustache)
"We’re songwriting together even if we’re not together" (@midchelle)
"John seemed like some sort of emperor in control of it all" (@blondecasino)
"I'm trying to get my son to have a son and call him Lennon, and then he'll be Lennon McCartney" (@peaceloveandstarrs)
“John and I had millions of fabulous little experiences in Paris” (@divine-sphinx)
"We used to have wanking sessions" (@merseydreams)
"You can be heterosexual and be having a homosexual dream and wake up, and think, 'Shit, am I gay?'" (@skylikeaflame)
"It was a place called Menlove Avenue. [Pauses] Someone's going to read significance into that: Paul and John on Menlove Avenue. Come onnnnnnn" (@s-l-martin)
"I slept with him a million times" (@s-l-martin)
"A wild and woolly genius who it was my pleasure to work with, walk with, talk with, and occasionally sleep with." (@didwemeetsomewherebefore)
"In bed" (@i-am-the-oyster)
"Well, I’m sure Brian was in love with John, I’m sure that’s absolutely right. I mean, everyone was in love with John; John was lovable, John was a very lovable guy." (@whenyourbirdisbroken)
"Dear friend, throw the wine, I’m in love with a friend of mine." (@heartsinthebasement)
"We got very drunk and cried about how we loved each other" (@nikidontsurf)
“Then also we were like married, so you got the bitterness. It’s not a woman scorned this time, it’s two men scorned — probably even worse. And I had to make way for Yoko. My relationship with John could not have remained as it was and Yoko feel secure.” (@thefortunateisle)
"If I was a girl, maybe I could go out and…" (@alienoriana, @majinmelmo)
"You just don’t hang around with your ex-wife" (@javelinbk)
"No, I have a lot of dreams about John, and they're always good" (@notgrungybitchin, @skylikeaflame)
"This (painting) is John’s Room. It just looked to me like John, when he had his long hair and then his cloak or whatever this is. Then I just scratched in that, looked like one of those drawings John used to do. You know his funny little men. So then I called that John’s room … If I’m gonna see a face in a painting it’s highly likely to be his." (@foryouwereinmysong)
"I wish I had sat and just hugged John all the time when we were together.’ (…) I’d just sit around and hug him forever. That’s the depth of my feeling for him" (@theoldmixer)
“Here Today - a love song to John” (@javelinbk, @bluewater9)
"So if you've got someone, you want to tell them you love them, just get it said, don't wait" (@lennon-gal)
And honourable mention for the following stories:
Stalking John all over Liverpool until Ivan officially got them introduced (@only-a-northern-soul)
‘He’s been telling himself and the whole world that nobody cared about writing songs and his music before he met John. He knew George Harrison.’ (@greatsaladavenue)
Quitting his job to commit to the band aka explicitly picking John over his father (@adriansfrombrooklyn)
Writing "Here, There, and Everywhere" by John's pool while waiting for him to wake up and write with him alone in his attic (@aint-that-kind-of-blog-bruv)
Taking the one photo of him and john from that night with the cursed pictures with jane and then blowing it up and hanging it in his office at apple (@pauls1967moustache)
Taking LSD so he could join John in his potentially bad trip (@scurator)
The time he vaulted over a table because another man was touching John and Paul had to physically intervene (@scurator)
#kind of heartbreaking seeing them all in one place#but also insane#some of these are even more insane in full context so I suggest you read the full quotes for maximum impact#paul mccartney#john lennon#john and paul#mclennon#insane quotes
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You leave the room behind and spend twenty minutes trying to get the grille more or less back in place. It doesn’t really work, but you manage to wedge it into the opening so that at least it won’t fall over on anybody. You still give it a worried glance as you leave.
The only place left to go is down the stairs, so down you go. At the bottom, you find a smallish room with an alcove, a huge iron door that someone made specifically to be intimidating, and a sloping hallway to the south. You hear frog calls echoing in the distance from the hallway.
There’s a rusty faucet in the alcove. Jimmy says, “You know what’s weird?”
You are spoiled for choice, frankly, but you humor him. “What?”
“Every time somebody turns that faucet handle, it breaks. But every time I come down here, it’s wired back into place.”
You consider this. “Magic or plumbers, do you think?”
Jimmy makes a flailing gesture with his wings. “I don’t know. Maybe this is some kind of afterlife for plumbers and the bad ones have to stay here fixing the same faucet for all eternity.”
This is an interesting theory. It doesn’t body well for your dreams of treasure, but then again, plumbers get paid way better than adventurers.
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twst food culture compilation
Please note: this post does NOT include all food-related lore in TWST (for example, you won’t find a lot of information about individual characters’ food preferences or personal experiences with food here). This post ONLY talks about the food culture, notable locations, cultural dishes, and unique foods of the Twisted Wonderland world at large (ie countries, specific towns and cities, etc).
I did my best to scour for info, but I’ll update if I find anything new or details I missed the first time around.
General and/or Unspecified Location
Icicle mushrooms are one of Twisted Wonderland’s three greatest delicacies. They are extremely rare and expensive.
There is a seasoning called “pure azure salt”, which is said to be rare, even in the Coral Sea.
Twisted Wonderland has a fruit called ruby berries (which taste “like freshly picked strawberries”).
There is frozen mint with a “refreshing profile” that grows in icy mountainous areas.
There exists Walrus-brand oyster sauce. Trey uses this to cook hamburger steak for his younger siblings. He says the oyster sauce provides a "nice savory flavor" with considerable depth. Trey also jokes about adding it to chestnut tarts in book 1.
There are mentions of irl Japanese foods such as konjac and takoyaki, but so far no place of origin in Twisted Wonderland has been sited.
Like in the real world, celebrities like Vil and Neige are used to promote products (including food and drink) in commercials, on social media platforms, etc. For example, in book 5, we see Neige advertising Red Apple Soda and Vil using his Magicam account to promote the apple juice made by Epel's family.
There's a popular dish called "pumpkin carriage stew". The insides of a pumpkin are scooped out and the shell is filled with a creamy stew, which made it difficult to carry over to tables. It would sell out every day at the cafe Ruggie used to work at.
Some restaurants call their spaghetti with meatballs "starry night spaghetti", named after the tale of two dogs who shared a spaghetti kiss under a starry sky. It is said that sharing spaghetti with meatballs with someone outside would lead to true love.
Hunting is sport as well as something done for food.
Crowley goes on vacation “to the South” and reports to enjoy mango and mango-flavored products from there. He also brings back manga tea as a souvenir.
Briar Valley
General
Cotton candy is a classic snack food sold at Briar Valley food stalls. The way it is prepared resembles spinning threads, which is considered a blessed occupation (as there was a period in Briar Valley's history when no one was able to spin thread, so some clever individual tinkered around and made cotton candy instead).
In the battlefield (~400 years ago, during the human-fae war), soldiers would roast rats and lizards to eat if they didn't have rations or other ingredients.
There is little in the way of modern technology and electricity; typically, one would prepare dishes and/or collect ingredients by hand (such as via fishing) or by using magic.
Magic is used to light fires for cooking. There is little risk for fire accidents since magical fires automatically go out when you go to sleep.
Because Briar Valley is located to the north, it can get very chilly. When the snow melts, it turns into very cold freshwater.
According to Lilia, “berries are a must-have, especially at birthdays parties” in Briar Valley. They are famous for its berry juice.
The forest where Silver and Lilia live has strawberries. Silver picks them with his animal companions.
Coral Sea
General
According to Jade, there are no fires in the Coral Sea. Therefore, most of the food consumed is raw.
A month-long land boot camp first established by a mermaid princess that married a human prince teaches merpeople fire safety and how to eat food as part of its curriculum.
It's rare for merfolk to eat anything sweet, as those kinds of foods aren't readily avaliable in the sea.
The Atlantica Memorial Museum has the mermaid princess's "silver hair comb" on display. This, of course, refers to the "dinglehopper"--a common fork. This implies that merpeople (such as the mermaid princess referenced in many stories) fused to be unaware of the eating utensils on land.
Azul's mother owns the "hottest restaurant" in the Coral Sea. It started off as a small place, but has since expanded to have a large staff.
Couples from the Coral Sea frequently request rainbow dessert soup with trident cookies for their weddings. To eat it, you use the trident cookie to stir the sweet sky-blue soup, which then turns the soup into seven colors of the rainbow. This is a dish that is only served for special occasions in the Coral Sea, and it is typically served warm.
Jade says that he was surprised to see that many land dwellers eat their fruit without the peel; this would imply that those from the Coral Sea typically eat their foods with the skin/peel left on, or as-is.
Playful Land Amusement Park
All food and drink are handed out for free.
They serve food in large quantities, such as tuna, entire tart cherry pies (with cinnamon, clove, and crushed nuts in the filling) and a whole peppery roasted chicken. The park encourages consuming in excess.
Other food items being offered include fried tuna fish and sparkling apple juice. The juice comes with an umbrella stuck in the opening to prevent bugs from getting in. You remove it before drinking.
They have ice-cream in many flavors! We see strawberry milk in the related event.
The park had candy and popcorn in “apple core” flavor. Supposedly, this is a taste inspired by the story of the Generous Fox giving a Puppet Boy an apple core instead of a whole apple because “the puppet wished to have a core”.
There is a “Candy Road”, a street lined with shops that have caramel lollipops, chewy candy, marshmallows, cookies, chocolate crunch, and lots of other sugary treats!
Their chocolate crunch has 12 different charms thrown in.
The third most popular souvenir are pasta snacks in the shape of the Friendly Fox and Gentle Cat. The second most popular is a tin of plain cookies in the shape of the Friendly Fox and cocoa cookies in the shape of the Gentle Cat. Finally, the most popular are apple core flavored candies!
Sage's Island
Night Raven College
Pomefiore holds a welcome party for the freshmen, which includes a fancy dinner. Savanaclaw does not hold a welcome party.
Scarabia regularly holds banquets, typically at Kalim's request.
Heartslabyul holds "unbirthday parties" whenever it is a day that does NOT fall on a Heartslabyul student's birthday. Sweets are mandatory at unbirthday parties.
The dorm members of Scarabia and Heartslabyul pitch in to prepare for banquets and unbirthday parties.
Mr. S's Mystery Shop stocks food items, such as candies (which Floyd often buys), tuna cans, and ingredients for baking (this is where Deuce and Yuu pick up things for the chestnut tart in book 1). Sam also sells food items that he seems to have made himself, like the Mystery Drink (which Octavinelle eventually buys the rights to).
The school cafeteria is said to have delicious breads.
Students can use the school kitchens outside of normal serving hours; Ruggie and Jamil sometimes do this, but they also have their own dormitory kitchens to cook.
Once a month, a famous bakery from out of town serves their goods at NRC. Their stock includes items such as chocolate croissants, egg sandwiches, yakisoba bread and cream bread ("cronuts and bear claws"), roast beef sandwiches, red bean buns ("hot dog buns"), and deluxe minced cutlet sandwiches ("deluxe ham and cheese"/"grilled cheese" in the localization). They sell out fast!
The school library includes recipes books. Some recipes include spicy curry soup, red pepper and tomato soup, and garlic pork habanero soup.
Basic school lunches are free to all students, but they must pay for changes or extra items.
The cafeteria at NRC serves food buffet style; the cafeteria is kept warm with magic from fire fairies which are supplied with dry firewood every day. There is also a rotating daily menu.
Master Chef ("Culinary Crucible") is an elective course at NRC that teaches students how to cook. It is meant to curb the expenses related to eating out and to help the boys maintain balanced diets and learn how to take care of themselves. Judges for this course are randomly selected from the students and staff (prior to this methodology, people would bribe the judges for extra credit).
While taking Master Chef, students help with preparing meals in the cafeteria in exchange for part-time pay.
The instructors for Master Chef are ghosts who were professional chefs at five-star restaurants when they were alive. These same ghosts also serve as cafeterias staff. Crowley says it was difficult but worthwhile to recruit them.
There are various locations on campus where the students go to fetch ingredients for Master Chef. This includes an on-campus farm, ranch, windmill... and even the dormitories themselves!
The woods behind the campus have chestnuts, which the main crew collect for an apology tart to Riddle.
The Botanical Garden has some edible plants growing there. These include strawberries, which the Science Club cultivates.
NRC opens its school gates to the local townspeople for a period leading up to Halloween; during this time, they distribute candy and other sweets (such as Sam's waffles, served with jam made from NRC's apples) to guests. There's also a party on Halloween night where lots of food is served.
Mostro Lounge
Octainvelle has the Mostro Lounge, described by Jade as "a meeting place for gentlemen" where fighting between dorms is prohibited. While dining there, students are expected to abide by Octavinelle's rules. It is run by the manager and founder, Azul, who made a deal with the headmaster to get the rights to open the establishment. NRC gets 10% of the revenue the Mostro Lounge makes.
Jade and Floyd partake in some cooking, but Azul does very little cooking. He tends to investigate the competition and market.
Jade uses the weeds and plants he collects from mountain hikes to brew experimental new teas. Sometimes Azul adds these drinks to the menu.
Floyd likes to experiment with making sauces. These, too, are featured in the lounge.
The lounge offers cakes with coral decorations. You can order one for your special occasions.
The Mostro Lounge is particular about its quality name-brand dishware. Azul believes that this will boost the experience customers have in the lounge.
The Octatrio bought the rights to the Mystery Drink from Sam and raised its price from 600 madol/6 thaumarks to 1500 madol/15 thaumarks.
The Mostro Lounge has a one-drink purchase minimum.
Menu items range from roughly 600 madol to 1500 madol (6 thaumarks to 15 thaumarks).
The menu rotates on a seasonal basis; this helps to cut down on costs since they can focus on cheaper in-season ingredients.
The Mostro Lounge also operates food stalls and/or sells food at many school events, such as the cultural festival in book 5 and the interdorm magical shift/spelldrive tournament in book 2.
It is mostly Octavinelle students who staff the Mostro Lounge, but there are occasions when outside students are brought in as extra help. Ruggie has worked there part-time, as well as Jack, Ace, Deuce, and tons of other students.
Unbirthday Party Rules (related to food)
Rule 25: There must be a tea party on the 5th of every month.
Rule 29: You must not eat the Queen's tarts without her permission.
Rule 153: The only tea you may drink in the evenings is herbal tea.
Rule 186: Do not eat hamburger steak on Tuesdays.
Rule 256: You must not drink lemonade with honey past 8 pm.
Rule 271: You must get up from the table within 15 minutes after eating lunch.
Rule 339: Your post-meal tea must be lemon tea with 2 sugar cubes.
Rule 529: If you eat steak on the night of a full moon, a cat must play the violin afterwards.
Rule 562: Do not bring chestnut tarts to an unbirthday party.
Rule 648: You must brush your teeth 2 times on nights when you eat turkey.
Rule 703: Whoever comes in 2nd place in a croquet match must serve tea to the Queen (dorm leader) the next day.
If the dormouse wakes up at an unbirthday party, you are to paint its nose with jam.
Coffee is forbidden; tea must be served at all occasions except for birthdays.
According to Cater, sweets are mandatory at unbirthday parties.
Dwarves' Mine & Silent Woods
There is an abundance of wildlife in these areas; Jade often goes hiking and foraging, making note of what he finds. He uses the plants to make his own tea blends (which are sometimes added to the Mostro Lounge's menu) and the herbs, plants, and mushrooms to experiment with in cooking.
There are fish to be found at the lake, including massive catfish.
The Foothill Town
There is a port for mainly cargo ships located at the southwest part of town. It's called Crane Port! The east side has a port as well, but that one is moreso for passengers. Crane Port has been getting fewer and fewer people passing through lately (until Port Breeze Fest, in which the NRC boys run food stalls and help to revive business in the area). Group A makes churros, Group B makes waffles, Group C makes salads, Group D makes cotton candy, and Group E makes clam chowder.
A popular restaurant in the Crane Port area serves foods like french fries and burgers. Their signature menu item is a donut made from potatoes. Actually, this restaurant specializes in potato dishes!
There is a chain restaurant on the island that also has locations elsewhere, including in Ace's hometown. He mentions that there are slightly different flavors to the sauces depending on which location you go to. This chain is also described as affordable for students and gives free refills. There is a location of this chain a car ride away from Harveston.
The town also has other eateries that are more geared towards students, seeing as it exists on an island with two notable magic schools to the north and the south. Cater often mentions going into town to take pictures at cafes.
The town has a public market; the Ramshackle Ghosts resell mandrakes there.
There is a famous patisserie there. You have to line up early in the morning before opening time to get your hands on one of their strawberry tarts (or anything, really!).
There is a stall in the marketplace that sells specialty coffee. They also have a tea which Crewel enjoys (though he also brews his own).
Scalding Sands
General
The Scalding Sands seems to borrow heavily from Middle Eastern cultures. For example, some of the Scalding Sands’ traditional dishes include, but are not limited to: roasted lamb, moussaka, döner kebabs, shawarma, flatbreads, potato and bean spreads, and seafood sautés.
Tea is a popular beverage; it is had at every meal and break. People can drink up to 10 cups of tea a day!
The Scalding Sands specializes in black tea. For entertaining guests, special tea leaves are used.
In the Scalding Sands, they brew their tea leaves loose and without an infuser. This makes the tea very strong and bitter. To counteract the powerful flavor, people add lots of sugar to their tea and drink it with sweets.
“Luxurious” tea is very sweet, since sugar was once very expensive (due to a shortage of it, according to the localization) and considered a luxury.
Due to the hot weather, people often toss herbs into their tea to make it more refreshing to drink.
Coffee is also popular; there are many cafes that serve coffee and tea. The Scalding Sands is known in particular for their spiced coffee, which has a very distinctive flavor. This coffee is brewed without a filter, and some cafes do “coffee divinations” (reading the shapes and patterns of the grounds and the water droplets that remain after drinking to tell the fortunes of customers).
There are a lot of unique spices in their dishes. This is especially true of banquet dishes. However, a variety of dishes are still served at these occasions.
Kalim describes the Scalding Sands as being “big on stewed stuff” like curries.
In Kalim’s hometown, people love to gather around the table and talk over a meal.
Halloween in the Scalding Sands is celebrated by feasting on a variety of dishes. The idea is that the food must be abundant so that the ghosts that return to the world of the living for the night may also have their fill.
It used to be difficult for the people of the Scalding Sands to obtain water due to the lack of rainfall, hot climate, and expansive desserts. However, Kalim’s ancestors utilized the country’s rivers to reach other countries and to trade their textiles, spices, tea leaves, and other local goods with foreign lands. It was particularly impressive at the time, as they were the first traders from the Scalding Sands to sail (back then, accurate nautical maps were not a thing). This maritime pioneering is what would make the Asim family their massive fortune.
The Asims and other merchants heavily invested in technologies and innovations to make the area more sustainable and potable water more accessible.
The waterways of the country eventually developed into canals and communities formed around them as trade hubs. The canals are also used to host ferryboats for locals and tourists to sightsee, boosting the tourism industry. This also made access to water much easier for the residents, and the water helps to cool the temperature.
Silk City
The bazaars in Silk City are where locals do their shopping for various goods and staple foods like vegetables and fish. There are also stalls with gourmet food that cater to tourists.
Camel Bazaar is named after camels, which were used to transport people, goods, and luggage before Silk City’s canals and roads came to be. There also used to be an oasis where the camels would rest and drink after long treks; this oasis became a center for commerce and eventually evolved into a marketplace. To this day, the name “Camel” has stuck, even if people use trucks, ships, and cars more than camels.
There is also Zahab (”Gold”) Market, which is popular with tourists for shopping (especially for souvenirs!) but also has swindlers and pickpockets mixed in with regular customers.
Many snacks are sold! There’s camel milk chocolate, cookies drizzled in syrup, sunflower seeds, pistachios, chickpeas, all kinds of nuts, dried fruits (including dates), jams, jellies, syrups, starfruit, dragonfruit, etc.
(Lamb) shawarma is described as meat roasted on a spit and served on baguettes or pita bread. Because grease drips off while it cooks, it is “surprisingly healthier” than one expects it to be. Shawarma is also customarily served with vegetables (tomatoes, onions, olives, jalapenos, etc.) and sauces (yogurt, garlic, chili, hummus (a paste of garlic and chickpeas), mayo basil, etc).
There is a vendor that can supply large quantities of sweet and refreshing coconut water; this is because they’re used to providing for Kalim’s extravagant and excessive tastes. They create a hole in the top and provide straws to poke in and use to drink the water. The coconut flesh inside is also edible.
There are a lot of bread stalls; bread is also another staple food, and it comes in many sizes, shapes, and textures. Small roadside bakeries have wood-fired ovens which allow them to serve bread fresh to customers.
One stand sells baguettes that are taller than many children; these “tower baguettes” are a famous Fireworks Festival treat. People say that if you eat a big one, you’ll never go hungry again! The saying comes from a story of a young man that shared bread with hungry children. It’s because of that story that baguettes are considered a good luck food that many vendors sell on holidays.
The Camel Bazaar sells an elastic ice-cream (based on a similar irl frozen Turkish confection). It is kneaded on a pole and stretched out; customers are meant to “catch” it in their cups and cones. It’s food performance art! All the stretching makes the texture very unique.
There’s a fruit stand that is only open on festival days which sells a Silk Melon sundae; the fruit is hollowed out to host ice-cream (of the same melon flavor!) and toppings which make it very photogenic.
Starfruit is usually put in salads, according to Trey.
The dragonfruit sold is recommended to be eaten with honey. You drizzle it on top of a slice and eat!
Silk City’s signature fruit is the Silk Melon. It is called that because of its silky texture and sophisticated sweetness. It can’t be found in many other countries. The man of legend that shared his bread with a starving child is said to split a melon with his friend, even though he did not have much money to spare. It’s because of this tale that people started saying if you share Silk Melon with someone, it would make your friendship or romance last forever. Now the fruit is a festival staple and considered a symbol of good fortune.
In the past, water was only used for irrigation due to its scarcity. Some gave up on farming after years of trying to produce crops and failing—but others refused to give up and cultivated the land to made it fertile, something which future generations would reap the benefits of.
The fruits and veggies sold Camel Bazaar are freshly picked and grown locally. Jamil says this is possible because the arid climate actually helps with growing crops of high quality. Produce raised with less water concentrates flavor since the final fruit will have a higher sugar content. Because of this, Silk City’s produce is prized by chefs all over Twisted Wonderland. Of course, you can get them at an affordable prize in Camel Bazaar!
Shaftlands
General
The Shaftlands are famous for its jeweled pineapples.
The Shaftlands spans a large area of land and has drastically different climates depending on the part of it you're looking at. Therefore, we can deduce that foods and customs surrounding food are very different as well.
City of Flowers/Fleur City
The city’s food culture seems to be inspired by real world Paris, or at the very least, France.
Bread is a local specialty, particularly very buttery kinds. As you walk down the streets, you can smell bread baking. The City of Flowers has 10x (or more) the variety of bread that Sage's Island offers, and has an abundance of bakeries too.
Bread-making is popular in the City of Flowers. The windmills at the edges of the city grind grains to produce fresh flour. There are also watermills powered by the Soleil River to assist with making flour.
Because wheat is plentiful in this area, some of it is also used for desserts. One such confection is financier, which is made from a combination of wheat flour, almond flour, and butter. It resembles a gold bar, so eating one is said to bring financial prosperity.
Lately, gluten-free desserts have been trendy.
A dessert that does not use wheat flour is macarons. In the City of Flowers, they are yellow and shaped like bells to honor the Bell of Salvation which oversees the community and provides magic that helps rare plants grow in the area. The filling is a ganache with dried bits of grapes and apples.
Grape juice is popular in the City of Flowers, as the fruit is another specialty. You can buy the grapes raw and eat them as is, or ask a vendor to crush it (skin still on!) into juice for you. Some buy the grapes to give as gifts!
The grapes are grown in vineyards right outside of the city, and the farmers are constantly experimenting to improve their breeds. They taste very rich, tangy, and sweet.
The City of Flowers is also known for its many specialty cheese shops. Together, bread and cheese are called the staple foods of the city, and are sometimes eaten together. One specialty cheese shop the boys visit sells baguettes topped with ham and rich melted cheese.
The city considers goats a symbol of good luck, so they are treated with care. There are many community goats (which are just as common as domesticated cats or dogs) allowed to roam freely in the city. It is said that if you treat the community goats with kindness, they will come rescue you in your time of need.
Goat milk is used in some of the specialty cheeses produced by the city. The grapes mentioned earlier are also made into fruit compotes to go with the cheeses.
They served a roast beef at the young mage’s social; this was infused with spices and evenly heated.
Harveston
This village has many dishes that borrow from a mixture of irl Nordic cultures. There’s also an emphasis on having hometown pride and the community itself being very close.
Crows often damage the apples Harveston grows. The community comes together to put up nets and make noises to scare them off.
As expected, many of Harveston's dishes feature apples: apple pie, grilled and roasted apples, apple salad, apple pound cakes, etc.
Epel's family has an apple orchard that has been in the family for generations. They grow different kinds of apples throughout the year. Many of his neighbors are older people who also raise produce, and they help each other out when they're short on hands. The community is very tightly knit because of this, and treat each other like extended family.
Harvest season (autumn) is the busiest time of year; once that's over, everyone comes together to have a party. It's a potluck style celebration where everyone brings a homemade dish or homegrown food to share.
Harveston preserves its produce (such as apples and wild greens) by pickling them and serving them in salads. The bright colors are maintained by boiling the produce in a copper pot, which stabilizes the pigments. It's wisdom passed down from generation to generation.
There is also pickled herring, traditionally eaten on bread. Brining preserves the fish while it is still raw and doesn't dry it up. It's ready to eat right out of a jar, no cooking required.
The local stew is not very thick. It tastes sweet because of the added vegetables and savory because of the tender meat in it. There is also a salmon broth sprinkled with herbs which is described as "melty".
Fruits and vegetables can be packed in snow to keep them preserved. This method is called “snow aging” and prevents evaporation. In the old days, the villagers would build whole farms out of snow. In modern day, they just shovel the snow into a barn. This creates a natural fridge that will naturally thaw in the summers. Snow aging in this manner makes the produce sweeter and more nutritious.
The next town over is a three-hour bike ride. The roadside has many apple trees you can enjoy during the trip.
You can easily pick apples off the branch and eat them fresh! Farmers can snack on apples while picking.
Harveston is surrounded by tall mountains that are snow-capped all year, the most famous one being Mt. Moln. The greenery around Harveston is due to the spring water irrigation which runs down from Mt. Moln.
Most of Harveston’s land is used for orchards, and apples are their main produce. They also make many products using those apples like chips, rice crackers, and cookies.
Fall apples are sweeter, while winter ones are more sour. Winter apples are unique to Harveston.
Harveston also grows a lot of garlic.
Harveston farming is done the old fashioned way, as the predominantly older population distrusts chemical fertilizers and biotechnology.
Some villagers like the mayor and Marja (Epel’s grandma) adjust their accent to communicate with people from outside the village. Marja says she switches up when she’s selling goods in another town, since it can be tricky for non-Harveston locals to understand.
Hand washing before eating is a must! They take the act very seriously in Harveston. Stories say the miners of the past used to get very sick due to poor hygiene, but their health improved drastically once they started washing regularly with soap and water. It was difficult for them to get treatment because the town is so remote and far from hospitals or doctors, so the best thing is stressing prevention. This why the townspeople are sticklers about hand washing now.
To wash the Harveston way, you plunge your hands into ice cold water and make it all foamy with soap. You also scoop the water up and splash your face as well (as the miners from the past would also do this).
You can catch salmon in the nearby river.
Apple Square is the main festival venue; it has many vendor stalls in an area called Kokko (which means “Bonfire”) Market. The Sledathon is the most lucrative time of year for the townsfolk.
Many of their products are made locally by the older folks in town. The goods aren’t trendy or very fancy, but they’re high-quality and made with Harveston pride.
The stalls give apple juice, apple tea (which has fruit pieces floating in it), and apple ginger tea for free. The apple juice is one of Harveston’s most popular products.
Giant five-meter apple pies are made for the Sledathon. They’re considered one of the main attractions, and you can get a slice from them free of charge.
There are other stalls that sell regular apple pie too. Every vendor has their own style, from the apples used to the crust and baking technique.
There are other kinds of fruit pies for sale, but apples are the most popular and “special” ones. The Beautiful Queen had a preference for apple pies, so the townspeople do too.
Harveston apple pies have such an entrancing flavor that the nearest city has stores that stock them. Critics say that Harveston apple pies make anyone drool and that the best way to convince someone to do you a favor is to gift one.
Harveston holds an apple competition to find the reddest apple. This is because the Beautiful Queen prized beautifully red apples. In the past, the townspeople would offer the reddest apple from the season’s harvest to the Beautiful Queen. Over time, it evolved into the apple competition.
Kokko Market makes pancake balls from a flour batter and top it with jam. It’s prepared in a pan and with methods similar to takoyaki, coming out crispy on the outside and fluffy on the inside.
Pancakes also come in a square form. In Harveston, pancakes are baked in the oven instead of on the stove. Some people cook pancakes in the fireplace too; this makes them tender, thick, and pudding-like.
There are many grains used for bread: sunflower seeds, pumpkin seeds, oats, flax seeds, sesame seeds, rye, wheat...
Barbeque is served for large gatherings and celebrations.
Cooking tends to be done in the fireplace instead of on a stove, especially in the case for stews. It keeps the room warm in winter while the food cooks.
Harveston has a bean and fruit soup. Most other places serve it cold, but those in Harveston sometimes enjoy it warm. It’s a thick consistency and the fruit in it has been dried.
Farmers drink tea on their breaks between work.
When setting the dining table, people in Harveston leave one extra plate out. This tradition comes from a story about a traveler visiting a family’s house and being surprised by the messy state of it. The traveler cleaned the house and cooked a nice meal for the family. From this story came the belief that as long as you leave a plate at your table, you’ll never want for food or go hungry.
Sandwich cakes are common party centerpieces. They are made with bread and vegetables, topped with shrimp, deviled eggs, olives, apples, and salmon slides arranged in a rose shape. The frosting on it is made from mayonnaise and sour cream, making sandwich cakes more salad than dessert.
They sell cherries and other berries by volume. Also sold are vegetables and juice, freshly squeezed.
Because Harveston is located in a mountainous region, there are rare varieties of mushrooms to be found. These can be served in a traditional mushroom soup, which can be finicky to prepare (so usually only experts make it). Mushrooms are also cooked in butter and served in sandwiches.
Mushrooms, herbs, and flowers are foraged from the nature (both public mountains and private woods). Locals usually don’t buy plants that are wild when they can pick it themselves. Instead, they’re sold to tourists.
Good foraging spots on Moln Mountain are kept secret so people don’t overharvest. The mountains are dangerous in winter, so foraging has to be done in spring or summer.
Harveston brines raw fish like salmon in a mixture of salt, sugar, pepper, and fill. In the old days, brined salmon was buried in sand to let it ferment.
Fish is dried to preserve it and to enhance the flavor. Before there were proper roads, it was hard to bring in food for the winter, so Harveston relied on foods preserved in the spring. They last for a long time and have many uses (such as in soup stock or to eat straight up). To this day, preserved meats and vegetables are a local specialty and new methods such as roasting have been developed for preservation.
Sunset Savanna
General
The food here appears to be inspired by African cultures of the real world.
Fruit is more plentiful than grains.
There is floral cacao in the Sunset Savanna. It bears fruit only once every 10 years.
Gummy bugs are popular and a Halloween staple.
The people of the Sunset Savanna value living in harmony with nature and will go out of their way to adapt to the land (due to the high population of beastmen, who have animal ancestors). Because of this, they oppose change that could damage the environment. There are some parts of this arid country that still rely on wells for their drinking water needs. They also hold the Tamashina-Mina festival every year to pray for rain.
Sautéed mutton is a common meal in this country. Leona brags that the Sunset Savanna is top notch when it comes to cooking meats.
The bananas of the Sunset Savanna are starchy and resemble potatoes (similar to plantains). They are steamed and served as a staple food. They’re faintly sweet and are actually very light and easy to digest.
It’s easier to grow fruit instead of wheat and rice in their climate.
Rice hull crepes, another staple, are served with a stew that you pour over it. The stew comes in variants such as a white fish stew simmered in tomato sauce, spinach and potato stew, beef stew, etc. There are also many side dishes you can enjoy with the crepes. The crepes aren’t meant to be eaten alone, as they taste too sour solo.
The phrase “that’s the Circle of Life” is a proverb that has been around for ages. The strong eat the weak, then when the strong die, their bodies become nutrients for the grass which feeds the next generation of prey animals. Life comes “full circle”, and the proverb indicates this delicate balance.
The Sunset Savanna is famous for its coffee. It tastes spicy, not bitter, because the custom is to add spices to the drink.
Food prep performances seem to be common for the wealthy; Leona mentions seeing big fish filleted before being served.
Yogurt is considered a “healthy dairy” and is typically served for breakfast.
Elephant Graveyard
The Elephant Graveyard, once considered a scary and lawless place (the “shadow lands” which were not a part of the original kingdom), has become a tourist destination—something akin to a spa.
They are known for selling vanilla cookies shaped like bones.
The hot springs at the Elephant Graveyard have kettles hidden by the steam. The hot water vapor cooks onsen tamago (a traditionally Japanese irl dish) and puddings. It imparts a slightly salty and sulfurous flavor and smell to the foods.
Sunrise City
The Raintree Market is a bazaar that features many foods and drinks.
Many snacks sold in the marketplaces are local specialties, so they’re popular as souvenirs.
Wild and cultivated hibiscus flowers are boiled with sugar to produce a red juice. There is also a white juice, which is made using wild baobab (which is full of nutrients; people call it a beauty elixir you can drink). A legends says that, long ago, members of the royal family would have their foreheads painted with baobab juice when they were born. That’s how the fruit became a local specialty.
In the original tale, the juice for marking foreheads was red. It seems that, over time, the color was changed to white by word of mouth, with the latter description fitting more with the white fruit of the baobab. Because of this change, more and more stalls have been selling a mixture of hibiscus juice and baobab juice.
The baobab fruit is also used to make a particular sour candy. The candy is dyed with red food coloring and is then dusted with sugar and chili powder. It’s described as having a “mature” flavor. Leona has liked this candy since he was a child.
Mangoes are a local specialty! Vendors will happily cut open the fruit for you to enjoy on the spot.
Other notable fruits for sale are tart passionfruit and creamy but smelly jackfruit. The latter is considered the largest fruit in Twisted Wonderland and grows on its tree’s trunks.
The Sunset Villa is a luxurious hotel that hosts VIPs and important guests of the state. They offer a large selection of drinks (fruit juice, black tea, coffee…) and serve whole slabs of steak in front of you before serving at luxurious barbecues. After dinners, they have dance performances.
There is an enormous sausage that’s wrapped up in a coil. If unwound, it’s a meter long. It’s meant to be cut with scissors before eating. The sausage’s herbs make it taste refreshing, and its meat is finely grounded to allow its flavors to come through.
Seafood is fresh and cheap, provided you live by the sea or in a coastal region like Dawn City. In more inland areas, seafood is considered a luxury.
Their seafood tends to be cooked with strong spices.
Ruggie’s yet-to-be-named hometown
Because the residents are poor, their food is usually made from collected scraps (such as pumpkin pie made predominantly from the pulpy parts) or prepared with substitutions and without extra flourishes. For example, Ruggie’s grandma prepares homemade donuts for his birthday but they couldn't afford fancy toppings (until Ruggie started working to bring in extra income).
It’s implied that there were instances when Ruggie (and presumably others from his hometown) had to eat rotten food or out of trash cans to get by.
Queendom of Roses
General
There is reference to some irl UK foods in this region, such as the jacket potato.
The Queendom of Roses is famous for its rose jelly rolls. Roses are the flower the country is best known for, of course, but they also have lavender, rosemary, sweet violet, foxglove, bluebells, and many berries.
People from this country eat flowers (which are specifically grown for eating). Flowers are also used for dried flower bookmarks? potpourri, etc.
The Queendom has a good selection of breads.
Apparently, the Queendom also has a strong “tea culture”.
People in the Queendom of Roses eat a lot of different pastries (pies, tarts, quiches, croissants, scones, etc). Croissant donuts (cronuts) in particular have been pretty trendy lately. They’re donuts made with croissant batter, so they come out super flaky. They are sometimes sold with iced tea as a combo.
Potatoes are a staple food.
Jacket potatoes are common at festivals; they are potatoes baked with the skin (ie “jacket”) still on. The standard topping for them is baked beans, but you can also have tuna mayo corn, bean chili, sour cream, avocado, and other things.
Anyone that grew up in the Queendom of Roses has probably done the “cookie smash” at least once as a kid. (More info on this under the “Clock Town” section!)
The Queendom is known for lavender, berries, and rosemary.
Riddle and Trey's yet-to-be-named hometown
Trey's family owns a bakery (called "Patisserie Clover" according to the TWST manga). It seems to be a small "mom and pops" shop with no particular notoriety. However, the manga implies that it was the Clover bakery where Riddle saw the strawberry tarts and became entranced by them. This is also where Riddle would later try his first strawberry tart.
In Riddle and Trey's hometown, people enjoy apple bobbing during the Halloween season.
Before interview: Riddle was worried whether they can start on time and was relieved when Vil showed up and Vil was pretty smug about it lmao
There is a farm not too far from where Riddle lives; it is famous for its ice-cream buns. There is also a cafe located on the farm! It opened shortly after Riddle entered NRC and is so popular that it’s spoken about in magazines and tourists go there just to sample their sweets.
Clock Town
The people of Clock Town value time and punctuality due to the town's connection to the White Rabbit, who was always in a hurry. Many of the foods sold at stalls are things that are easy to hold and eat while walking, such as sliced sandwiches.
The Clock Town Folk Museum mentions a girl that appears in the story of the White Rabbit. She ate cookies that made her grow large; the museum recreates this experiment by projecting a large image of guests that eat cookies they have set out.
The Clock Town Folk Museum also runs a bugle-playing contest. The participation prize is a carrot cookie.
Clock Town sells a brand of potato chips with the White Rabbit logo on them.
The town also sells cookies iced to look like a pocket watch. The icing is made from a mixture of sugar and egg whites (“royal icing”) which hardens considerably. You’re meant to crush the cookie with a hammer to make it into smaller pieces, making it easier to eat. It’s based on the story of the White Rabbit breaking his pocket watch. Others tried to help him fix it by hitting it with a hammer, but it didn’t help at all, only damaged it more!
A lot of people enjoy growing plants, gardening, and horticulture, including stuff that can be eaten like herbs.
Sausage rolls are served in pairs to resemble bunny ears; the container they come in resembles the White Rabbit. They’re sausages wrapped in a pie crust/puff pastry dough, and come in cheese (with a shortcrust pastry similar to what is used for tarts to help hold its shape) and a spicy sausage (with a puff pastry that makes it flaky) variant for the White Rabbit Festival.
There are large mushrooms that grow in Clock Town; eating one side will turn you large, eating the other side will turn you small. The girl in the story of the White Rabbit has eaten these strange mushrooms before. These mushrooms are said to be enchanted and only work in a particular area; its effects last for ~1 minute after eating.
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can i please have a charcuterie board served cold. And for my main can i have caviar and oysters with a side of sushi and kimchi with strawberry lemonade and i would LOVE dessert. Served by Toto Wolff xx
Dia's Diner Menu
charcuterie board dating cold appetizer rough sex caviar and oysters "Gonna look so good full of my babies" sushi "Better quiet down, you don't want them to hear us" kimchi "Be a good girl and take it" strawberry lemonade breeding kink dessert aftercare
Toto Wolff x girlfriend!reader
TW: sex in a public bathroom, unprotected sex, mentions of babies
WC: 1k
A/N: I didn't really do much with aftercare, I'm sorry.
❀
“Toto, please!” I begged, pulling on the collar of his shirt.
Tonight was some dinner function for the team and Toto insisted I come with him. I had been needy all night, the fact that I couldn’t keep my eyes away from his arms which looked extra delicious tonight with his sleeves rolled up doing nothing to help me.
So after a few too many teasing touches and needy glances and a lot of ignoring Toto’s
disapproving looks telling me to stop - Toto’s patience finally snapped and he pulled me into the bathroom.
And that’s how we ended up here, with me sitting on the sink, my legs wrapped around his waist and desperately trying to grind against him for some kind of friction.
Toto laughed, the sound of it practically vibrating through me. His large hands went under my dress and he grabbed my panties, yanking them down roughly. “So wet you soaked your underwear, huh?” He teased, lifting the material up to show me that they were indeed practically fully soaked.
I whined in embarrassment, hiding my face in the crook of his neck, my lips latching onto the skin off throat.
“I don’t remember you being this shy when your hand was on my dick under the table.” Toto said, grabbing a fist-full of my hair to pull my head back and make me face him. “If you want me to fuck you then you better look at me or I’ll leave you here desperate and wet and go right back out there.”
I was only half sure he was joking, but didn’t want to test how truthful the threat was. I fixated my eyes on his, ignoring the urge to close them when his hands went back between my legs, fingers ghosting over my clit.
“Please Toto,” I whined, trying to close my legs around his hand. “Need you to fuck me. Need your cock in me, please.”
“Is that right?” He asked, grabbing my hands and putting them on the waistband of his pants. I wasted no time, unbuttoning his pants with trembling fingers and pushing them down along with his boxers. “My needy girl just wants to be full of my cock.”
Toto bunched up the fabric of my dress and pushed it up so it was pooled around my stomach, leaving my pussy bare for him to see. His hands wrapped around my legs and he spread them wide to accommodate his hips. Not wasting a second more he roughly pushed into me, the whole length of him disappearing inside of me within a single thrust.
I all but screamed at the intrusion, welcoming the delicious burn at the initial stretch around him and wrapped my legs around his waist.
“Should I stuff you full of my cum too?” He growled in my ear, beginning to thrust into me. “Keep you full with my cum until you’re full with my baby?”
I clenched around him, his words sparking something up inside of me. Toto laughed, his thrust speeding up, becoming rougher and hitting deeper. With every return of his dick deeper into me the tip grazed against my g-spot, making me shake with pleasure.
“You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Can feel you clenching around my dick like a desperate whore.” His fingers sneaked down to play with my clit, rubbing it in harsh fast circles making me scream from how good he was making me feel.
His other hand came up to my face and he grabbed my chin with force. “There’s other people in this restaurant too, you know? Better quiet down, you don’t want them to hear us.”
His thrusts were becoming more desperate, more feral. I could tell he was close and chasing his orgasm - I was close too.
“Toto,” I tried to keep my voice down, wanting to obey what may have been worded as a suggestion but much more a demand. “I’m gonna cum, fuck I’m so close. Cum with me, please, cum in me.”
With both hands I grasped his shoulders, trying to hold on for support because I felt like my body was on fire and I was melting.
Toto groaned, the rhythm of his hips faltering, his orgasm crashing into him right as mine crashed into me. I tightened my legs around his waist, caging him in as he began to spill inside of him. I could feel his cum, hot inside of me.
“Fuck, yeah. Be a good girl and take it.” He growled, “Take my cum. I’m filling you up so good, aren’t I?” He brushed my hair out of my face and cupped my cheek. “You’re gonna look so good full my babies. Stomach swollen with my kid - everyone’s gonna know how good I fucked you.”
I whined as he pulled himself out, pulling his boxers back up and then his trousers. “You feeling good, sweet girl?” He asked, looking at me lovingly.
“I feel exhausted,” I said, my voice hoarse. “In the best possible way.”
He smiled and leaned forward, his lips pressing against mine for a kiss. The kiss was sweet, slow, full of passion. Completely different from the way he fucked me, but I didn’t mind. I never minded anything with him.
Toto took my panties out of his pocket, I hadn’t even noticed when he put them there, and put them back on me. “Gotta keep you full.” He said and then helped me get off the sink, supporting me when my knees buckled.
“People are probably wondering where we are,” I said, reaching to unlock the bathroom door. “We should get back.”
“You’re right, come on.” He said, guiding me outside. Just as we were leaving the bathroom, his hand came to slap my ass. One single rough slap, enough to make me yelp. “And you better behave for the rest of the night or you’re going to end up bent over the table for everyone to see how much of a whore you are for me, is that clear?”
“Yes, daddy.”
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