#that would be where id say the love comes in but
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misayani · 2 days ago
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MAGNETIC — SQUID GAME WOMEN + THANOS AND YOU BEING THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE OF THEM HCS
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◜ featuring ... kang mi-na (player 196), no eul (guard 011), se-mi (player 380), jun-hee (player 222), hyun-ju (player 120), young-mi (player 195), + thanos (player 230)
𔗨 author's note — IM FUCKING BAAAAAAAAACKKKK RAWGHHRRR !!!!!! writing this had me SWEATING considering the lack of information of them in the show. anddd im closing the requests for now. id like to work on the current requests in my inbox before i open it again ♡ [lowercase intended]
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mi na —
- at first you were hesitant to confess your feelings to her because why  would she want to be with someone like you?
- and then you kept avoiding her and denying your feelings to avoid getting hurt 
- then, life surprises you, she kissed you on the night she took you out for a 'girlFRIEND date'
- AND THEN BAM !!! dating
- she's feisty and confident, you're gentle and shy
- mi-na is the type to be sassy and bitchy to everyone and then when it comes to you she turns into a total softie
- "thanos, i swear if you don't shut the fuck up—" "mi-na?" "yes honey?"
- SHE LOVES CALLING YOU SWEET NICKNAMES JUST TO SEE YOU MELT
- you'd think mi-na likes to be treated like a princess and then it turns out that she's the one treating YOU like a princess
- when you're speaking and someone completely cuts you off, without a second thought, she'll speak up
- "my girlfriend is speaking??"
- when someone's rude to you, she'll handle it for you
- "excuse me? watch your words when you're talking to her."
- she doesn't do this all the time though
- she wants you to learn how to speak up for yourself 
- but she definitely doesn't let it pass when someone crosses the line
- there was this one time where mi-na legit got into a catfight after someone humiliated you in front of many people
- she got humiliated in front of the people too but she DIDNT feel humiliated at all
- the bitch just messed with her girlfriend, and she just stepped up for you. what's humiliating about that?
- (outside squid game) let's say thanos is a mutual close friend you both have
- whenever he pisses her off, he immediately runs to you for defense since mi-na has a soft spot for you
- overall, mi-na likes taking care of you and you're gentle to her sooo it's a win-win for the both of you !!!
- she loves her shy gf so much, it makes her all mushy and softie
no eul —
- she's hard, you're soft
- oops i may have worded that wrong
- GRUMPY X SUNSHINE 
- you always wake her up with kisses and she'll open her eyes to the sight of you smiling at her
- then she'll complain, grumbling about your "unreasonable" optimism. but she literally lets you kiss her the whole time anyways !!
- no-eul constantly furrows her eyebrows at your cheery attitude as if she was judging you. BUT DEEP DEEP DOWN, her heart swells for you
- she might be grumpy through words, but it's the actions that speak louder
- if someone's mean to HER sunshine, expect their face to get fucked up
- her love language is acts of service btw!!!!
- you will never ever get to hold a door ever again when you're with her cs she'll always open them for you
- AND SHE LOVES GIVING YOU 'JUST BECAUSE' GIFTS
- "here." she hands you a boquet of sunflowers with A CUTE LITTLE NOTE ON THE SIDE THAT SAYS I LOVE YOU, "awhh thank you! but, what's the occasion?" and then she just shrugs
- back then, whenever the two of you got into an argument, a bad trait she used to do is to shut you out. while you, on the other hand, always wanted to talk things through and find solutions 
- after a few attempts, you eventually break her walls down and then she finally lets you in
- "...i'm sorry" "it's okay! we're in this together, 'kay?" 
- she feels so bad because what if you're just trying to put up with her 
- and then that worry completely washes away when she feels that you're actually genuine. 
- you don't just say sweet shit, you act them out.
- and she'll forever be thankful for you
- you're the reason why she wakes up everyday, you're the reason why she takes care of herself, you're the reason why she learned to love herself
se mi —
- this woman has a sharp tongue
- which can definitely be used in multiple ways but mostly for saying sarcastic remarks
- (in the games) she's expressive but then she's emotionally guarded at the same time. she won't be scared to speak her mind but she rarely shows her expressions physically
- oh gosh. her and her fucked up humor
- others may think she never takes shit seriously, but it's actually THEM she's not taking seriously
- she absolutely doesn't like openly-vulnerable people. it's not anything personal, she just thinks that it's stupid to show emotions like that in a death game like this where anyone could literally take advantage of you.
- and then here comes you, kind and empathetic
- you're the type to put others first before you, and she hates that fact, but not you
- you're expressive with your feelings also, but instead of being like her, who masks it perfectly with her sarcastic exterior, you're genuine.
- you believe that showing real emotions is a way to connect with people
- se-mi had observed you during the six-legged pentathlon. it amuses her seeing you work well with your team.
- she fucking hates the fact that you're just so kind and open to every one, not even thinking twice to help others.
- (outside squid game) while se-mi sees the world as harsh and unforgiving, you always tell her about the bright side and hope and some happy shit. and she didn't like that
- she didn't like how you're actually starting to make her see even just the tad bit good in some things
- and then the next thing she knows is that she literally starts to think about you in every single fucking thing
- she sees sunlight, she thinks of you. she sees flowers, she thinks of you. she sees butterflies, she thinks of you. man, even whenever she buys her favourite cherry ice cream, somehow the ice cream legit reminds her of you. because apparently, to her, ice cream gives off positive vibes ????? 
- and positive vibes are YOU !!
- over time, she may not admit it but she definitely cannot deny that she's starting to soften under your influence
- and who knows? maybe she's starting to see that kindness isn't always a weakness. 
jun hee —
- she's an introvert, you're an extrovert. need i say more
- junhee mostly keeps to herself, but unlike no-eul, she isn't totally closed-off
- she's quiet and won't react unless needed
- you on the other hand, reacts to everyfuckingthing
- somebody's hand gets too close to her belly? "GET AWAY!"
- you even audibly gasp when someone gives her a dirty stare
- (outside squid game) when jun-hee gets excited about something, she'll just smile. but it immediately drops as soon as she turns her head to look at you who almost fell on the floor, face first, because of jumping around like crazy.
- it amazes her a lot how you make it look easy to just start a conversation with a complete stranger
- now whenever you make friends, she also makes new friends, because you always introduce your girlfriend to them !! <3
- between the two of you, you're the one who usually initiates physical touch
- just simple and cute hugs here and there, sometimes kisses, sometimes more than kisses
- she's the type to show her love to you through simple gestures like making you your favorite tea, playing your favorite song on the TV, writing you notes before she goes out while you're still sleeping (awwhdjsjssk)
- and then you're the type to express your feelings VERY LOUDLY
- telling her "i love yous" whenever you always get the chance to which is like every minute—but you mean every single one everytime—, giving her tight hugs, prepping soft kisses on her face, demanding her to give you cuddles.
- everything needs balance, so jun-hee learned to socialize more and have fun while you learned to be more mindful whenever she needs her own quiet time
hyun ju —
- hyun-ju tends to be cool-headed and calm in most scenarios, while you are always on your toes and stressed and just so energetic overall
- hyun-ju shows love in subtle ways, like doing your hair or giving you quick pecks on the cheek ♡
- she never fails to notice it when you're stressed. she'd grab your hand and start massaging it softly
- whenever your friends invite you to a night out, you always ask them if you could bring hyun-ju !!!!
- it's simple: they refuse, you aren't going. if they say yes, then be prepared to have one of the best nights out in your lives BECAUSE hyun-ju is fun!!!! hello ? being an introvert does not mean you're not any fun
- hyun-ju would literally chug up every drink your friends give her
- and then theres you who's worried as fuck because what if she vomits???? and you HATE vomit, eugh !!
- the next morning comes and then hangover finally hits her
- you, being a good girlfriend, always brings her water and some pills to help her with the headache
- 'hyun-ju drink this' 'hyun-ju drink that' which results to her needing to pee like every 5 minutes
- she calms you down, telling you that she's fine and all she needs is you beside her
- literally just your presence
- and then despite having a headache, she would ask you to yap for her, she just loves hearing your voice
- overall, hyun-ju is forever thankful for you. she appreciates the fact that you're always alert about things but she also reminds you to let loose sometimes.
young mi —
- she's shy, you're not
- you're so mean for always teasing the poor girl
- but you can't help it, not when you always catch her staring at you
- "do you need anything? or do you just need me?" 
- give her a damn break
- not a day goes by without you hugging the hell out of her
- "you're so flufffyyyyyy babyy" "...thank you?.." 
- she always seeks comfort in you, since you're the one who keeps things exciting
- in public, young-mi doesn't speak up much, so you speak for her when needed
- "excuse me, you got her food wrong." "it's fine i swear!!"
- it's surprising but she's actually the one who initiates affection most of the time, she'd just shyly do it
- during arguments, she might struggle to express her feelings sometimes through words, and even when you're supposed to be mad at her, you still try to keep your calm and help her speak for herself
- it always ends up with the both of you apologizing to each other. you would never let your girlfriend sleep with a heavy heart, never.
- sometimes you'd surprise her with cute gifts like small trinkets or cute plushies !!! 
- as time goes by, young-mi slowly learns to speak up for herself, because, of course, you're not always going to be by her side. 
thanos — 
- PLAYFUL BF + SERIOUS GF
- he thinks you have such a hot resting bitch face
- LIKE HE'D LITERALLY INTERNALLY SQUEAL LIKE A HIGH SCHOOLER
- babygirl bf + girlboss gf <3
- you're never scared to speak up for yourself. thanos insists on punching anyone who does you wrong but you assure him that you're fully capable of doing that yourself
- "THAT'S MY GIRLFRIEND BRO!!"
- literally brags you to nam-gyu and talks about you almost all the time
- nam-gyu's fucking tired of it.
- people thinks this man fears no one?? he's fucking scared of YOU
- FOLDS WHEN U CALL HIM BY HIS FULL GOVERNMENT NAME
- "cmon baby, give thanos a kiss." "choi su-bong." "what:(("
- but when nam-gyu learns about his full name and starts teasing him about it and calling him that:
- "hey, only she's allowed to call me that. mind your business." "dang okay bro" 
- literally goes crazy when he texts you something and you reply with an "ok."
- "the fuck did i do nowww"
- he internally cheers when you're on your period because that'll mean you'll ask him for kisses and hugs
- "baby, let's cuddle please" "oh look at what we have here now—" "nevermind." "NO! yes, yes, let's cuddle"
- to others, he's tough and mighty but when it comes to you, he submits
- LMAO when he tries to call you by your full name to try and reverse the roles, you just give him a weird look and that made him want to bury himself 6 feet under.
- he's very very clingy, would literally sulk when you don't give him a goodbye kiss before you leave the house 
- when you're in a bad mood, he tries his best to cheer you up, like rapping random sweet shit to you or attempting to dance in front of you. keyword: attempting
- and as soon as he saw that small smile form on your face, he almost felt like everything went slow motion
- you're so gorgeous, he's down bad for you
- but he genuinely feels happy once he knows that you're fine now because of him !!
- he's so silly :3
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@misayani
𝓜isa mentions — @joc3lynx @mymel1008 @justredsw @wlvlurvsfimmia @azansstuff @dvrk-hoon @yersang-dreams
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manic-quinn · 4 hours ago
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i once had to break up with someone while we were still in love. i was going through a rough patch and they needed more than i had to give. right person, wrong time
they tried to get back together with me on 3 separate occasions in the following month
the first time they sent me this long text about how
“we could work together so that it’s different this time. you didn’t let me help you with your issues and i never communicated mine. i just can’t shake the feeling that we made a mistake”
i missed them dearly and i almost went back…but they hadn’t changed and neither had i. as much as i wanted to pretend we could work on it, i knew that it would just be a matter of time before we broke up again. breaking their heart once almost killed me and i simply couldn’t risk doing it again. so i wrote a heartfelt paragraph to say
“i wish you the best and i want to make you happy, but it’s only been a week and nothings changed. im sorry but no”
it hurt, but it was necessary. i hope they understood where i was coming from. then a few days later, they texted me again and said
“we had something special” (and we did) “i take all the blame. you were always enough, all i need is you”
again, i thought about it for a moment…but the truth is that if they didn’t have needs then we wouldn’t have broken up. i knew i was just as much to blame as them. they just wanted the grief to go away and would say anything to make it happen. if we got back together, id let them down again so i wrote a few short sweet sentences telling them that
“you have a lot to offer and you’ll find someone else. ill always be rooting for you. im sorry, but no”
the third time they insisted on calling. i told them I wouldn’t change my mind, but they insisted things would be better if we could talk over the phone. for 45 minutes, they repeated everything they ever said. trying to find anything that would change my mind.
“ive never felt like this before”
i tried to be gentle with them but there are only so many ways you can say
“im sorry but no”
eventually they ran out of words. they apologized and said they’d leave me alone, but ill never forget what they said before we hung up
“i wish i could’ve written this off like you did”
they thought that I had just moved on and what we had meant nothing to me i didn’t know how to explain that every time i said
“im sorry, but no”
what i really meant was
“i love you enough to let you go”
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yuikomorii · 2 days ago
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Shu-Yuma because their friendship is the most engaging in the series, yet idk if it still counts as mere friendship, given that in DF and LE it was sort of implied that Shu feels something more for Yuma.
I saw this interesting point you made, I’ve played both games repeatedly over the years and have honestly never thought of it as anything much what’s presented surface level. I’m intrigued by your comment and would love to see what points in routes could be used to back up such an interpretation? :)
p.s you converted me into ayato stan ;P
// Hello there, fellow aNYAto stan! >:3
In my opinion, Shu seems to have feelings for Yuma because he is overly obsessed with him and his well-being, to the extent that he does things for Yuma that he doesn’t even do for us, the players.
Of course, he does feel guilty, but even Shu admits that feeling such remorse is unusual for him, and he's right.
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We know Shu is a sadist who enjoys torturing his prey in grotesque ways, so why doesn’t he regret what he did to the previous sacrificial brides? Why doesn’t he regret hurting his own brothers? He sometimes doesn’t even feel remorse when he’s hurting you/Yui. But when it comes to Yuma… Shu would sacrifice ANYONE for him.
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This guy must have some kind of built-in Yuma radar, since there’s no other way to explain how he always manages to find him. He willingly goes out of his way to save him and doesn’t even care if he looks pathetic, as long as Yuma is safe, even in routes that aren’t his own, where he’s supposed to be a lazy and apathetic loser.
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Not only that, but Rejet had to make him commit sui€ide and then say the “I hope we will get along in another life 🥺” part. What makes it even crazier is that he’s reincarnated as a fetus from the Tree that Yuma later decides to adopt. Basically, his wish to be on good terms with Yuma was so strong that it literally came true. When Shu dies in his own endings, he never says anything as emotional or profound, which is a bit… questionable.
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Last but not least, you know how the apple is supposed to symbolize Edgar? It almost feels like Shu was trying to hint something, but when Yuma didn’t catch on, Shu was just like “Yeah… nevermind.”
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All translations belong to dialovers-translations
While I understand that he might consider him a "best friend," it feels obvious that, deep down, Yuma holds a more significant place in his heart than anyone else. The way he fixates on Yuma makes it seem like their bond goes beyond mere friendship, with Yuma being someone irreplaceable and central to his world.
I know that BL themes would likely never be included in Diabolik Lovers, given the backlash such elements often receive in otome games. As a result, everything is left open to anyone’s interpretation! :3
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starlemons · 3 days ago
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Coffee and Crime ⋆✴︎˚。⋆ PART TWO
Pairing ✦ mafia!bucky x reader
Word Count ✦ 2.2K
Warnings ✦ overall story has a 18+ content warning, MDNI, unwanted groping, attempted SA, mentions of being roofied, mention of blood, physical violence, alcohol, clubbing, someone flashing a crowd, cussing
A/N ✦ I wrote part two a lot quicker than I thought I would, I'm actually really enjoying this story so far! Stay tuned for part three :)
PART ONE »»» Series Masterlist
I will update the series every 1-4 days depending on my schedule
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“Would you get your head out of la-la-land and focus.”, Nat said, snapping her fingers in front of your face.
It had been three days since your interaction with Bucky, and you kept finding yourself daydreaming about him, wishing the handsome man would come back into the coffee shop soon.
“Sorry Nat.”, you said sheepishly rubbing the back of your neck.
Your friend stood in front of you in her bedroom, a tight purple dress clung to her figure.
“What do you think of this one?”
“You could wear a trash bag and still look amazing. But I think that I like the green one more.”, you said pointing to the silky cocktail dress she had tossed onto the bed next to where you sat. 
“Well then I guess green it is.”
The two of you were at your and Nat's shared apartment, readying yourselves to go out for your mutual friend Thor’s birthday party. Nat considered herself a clubbing queen, she loved to be the life of the party. You on the other hand would prefer to be at home. 
“Now little-miss-wallflower.”, Nat said pointing to you, “We need to put together something for you to wear.”
She had you try on outfit after outfit, repeatedly saying none of them had that oomph she was going for. 
“Nat can I just wear this?”, you pleaded with her, gesturing to the long black bodycon dress she had put you in.
“No, that's not fitting the image I have in my head.”, she said, ruffling through the closet. 
“And what exactly is that image?”
“I want a sexy, bold, outgoing vibe.”
“You know that being bold and outgoing aren’t exactly my thing, right?”
“Exactly, you need to get out of your comfort zone Y/N, live a little.”
After several more outfit changes Nat finally found the perfect ensemble. A red-wine colored dress adorned your body. Its neckline dipped dangerously low, reaching below your sternum and the bottom of the garment barely hit mid-thigh. 
“Isn’t this a bit much?”, you asked, looking yourself up and down in the mirror. 
“Not in my opinion.” she shrugged, “But anyways you look amazing so I say this is it.”
Staring at yourself again, you did have to admit the dress did make you feel hot. 
“Okay fine, you win, I’ll wear this.”
Nat smiled from ear to ear, “Amazing! Now let’s finish getting ready.”
You added a pair of black heels to your outfit, straightened your hair, and Nat had helped you do a smokey eye for your makeup. After an hour of getting ready, the two of you were walking out the front door and heading downstairs to wait for your Uber. 
After the quick car ride, you and Nat found yourselves outside a club, a bright blue neon sign reading Supernova sat above the front door. Both of you joined the line to get in. Once you reached the front, the bouncer checked your ID’s and stamped your hands with a shooting star that lit up under the flashing lights. 
You scanned the club, glancing over the horde of people, before your eyes finally found who you were looking for. Grabbing Nat’s hand you pulled her behind you in the direction of your friends.
“Y/N! Nat!”, Thor cheered seeing the two of you approaching. 
“Hi Thor! Happy Birthday!”, you yelled over the booming music, giving him a hug.
You then greeted your other friends; Wanda, and Clint. The group sat at a table near one of the many small stages scattered about the club. Each of the platforms had girls dancing on them. Your eyes quickly looked away as one of them took off her top, cheers erupting from the group of men standing below her. You felt beyond out of your element. 
“You look like you’re about to jump out of your skin Y/N.”, Clint chuckled at you.
You shrugged at him, “I think I just need to get a drink in me. I’ll be right back.”
Walking away from your friends you snaked your way through the throng of people dancing, reaching the bar. 
The bartender, a girl with bright pink hair and several facial piercings, turned from the man she was talking to, yelling from the other end of the bar top, “Be with you in just a second!”
You nodded at her, looking up at the chalkboard menu sitting above many shelves of alcohol. Your eyes scanned over the neon pink chalk settling on the special for the night. 
Tonight's Special: Midnight Whisper
⛦ vodka, blue curacao, grenadine, sprite, edible glitter
⛦ $11
You leaned up against the bar, studying your surroundings while you waited. Couples were dancing a little too close for comfort, there was a group of girls circling around one of their friends as she threw up in a trashcan by the dancefloor, a group of frat boys sang along to the music blasting through the club. 
As your eyes glanced at the V.I.P. area, they widened in shock. Bucky sat in the corner, surrounded by Steve and a few more men. You locked eyes with him and he raised his glass towards you, shooting you a smile. 
“What can I get for you?”
You jumped in surprise, turning to see the bartender. 
“Can I get a Midnight Whisper?”
“Of course, that’ll be $11.”
Reaching inside your purse your fingers wrapped around your wallet, pulling it out to pay. 
“I’ve got it.”, a voice said from behind you.
You looked over your shoulder seeing a man you didn’t know behind you. 
“It’s okay really.”, you said.
“No, I’ve got it sexy, a lady with a body like yours shouldn’t have to pay.”, he smirked down at you.
He handed the bartender some cash.
“Um thank you.”, you said flatly.
“No problem, smoke show, I’m Caleb, by the way.”
“Nice to meet you.”, you grumbled, not meaning it at all, but trying to be polite because he just bought you a drink. 
“Here you go girly.”, the pink haired girl slid you your cocktail.
Caleb slid his arm around your shoulders, hand lingering over your drink. You were looking at his face as he did this, trying to figure out how to get out of this situation.
Reaching for your drink, you turned away from him, “Thanks for the drink, I’ve got to get back to my friends now, they’re probably wondering where I went.”
Caleb’s hand shot out, gripping your bicep, “What do you mean you’ve got to go back to your friends? I just bought that for you, can’t you stay and at least talk to me for a bit?”
“First of all,let go of me.”, you hissed yanking your arm out of his grip, “And secondly I tried to pay for my own drink, but you insisted, I said thank you for it, but that doesn’t mean I owe you shit.”
You turned and weaved back through the crowd towards your friends. 
As you approached Nat raised an eyebrow at you.
“What’s got you in such a sour mood.”, she said, studying your visibly pissed expression. 
“Some dude bought my drink for me and acted like I owed him a conversation because of it.”, you rolled your eyes.
“I would be irritated too.”, Wanda said from beside you.
You laughed, “Anyway enough about that weirdo, guess who I just saw Nat?”
“Who?”
Grinning, you said, “That Bucky guy from work the other day!”
“Oh my God!”
“Who’s Bucky?”, Wanda asked.
You filled your friend in on the handsome man. 
“Why don’t you go ask for his number?”, Clint said, eavesdropping on your conversation.
“Because he’s in the V.I.P area, and I don’t have the balls to do it.”, you laughed out, taking a sip of your drink. 
Just then Thor appeared, having come from the dancefloor.
“Come on guys let's go dance!”, he yelled.
He grabbed your hand pulling you with him, the rest of your group following behind.
As you guys danced and drank, you began to feel weird. Your head was pounding and you were hit with a wave of nausea. 
“I don’t feel good.”, you whispered to Nat, and you rushed to the bathrooms. 
“Hey wait-”, she called after you.
You disappeared into the crowd leaving Nat behind, as you stumbled through bodies, your vision began to get blurry leaving you a disoriented mess. There was no way that one drink had done this to you.
Finally you reached the hallway in the back of the club that led to the bathrooms. You shakily leaned up against the wall, dragging yourself along the cool cinder blocks towards the ladies room. Suddenly you found yourself pushed up against the wall, your back smacking it so hard you almost felt the wind rush out of your lungs.
“Hi beautiful.”, Caleb jeered at you. 
“What-”, you slurred out, tongue feeling heavy.
He cut you off, covering your mouth with his hand, moving your lolling head back. His other hand settled on the back of your thigh, slowly creeping its way up, his fingers digging into your ass cheek. Your body was like Jell-O, you couldn’t move, leaving you defenseless. You felt tears begin to well in your eyes as you looked up at him. 
Next thing you knew Caleb was lying flat on his back a few feet away and you crumpled sliding down the wall to the ground, your legs unable to support yourself.
“What the hell man!”, Caleb screamed, a cut to the side of his head had blood cascading down his face.
“Just what the fuck do you think you’re doing.”, someone said.
You looked up at your savior, realizing it was the same man who had generously tipped you the other day. 
“Oh what so a guy can’t feel up his girlfriend anymore?”, Caleb lied.
“Sweetheart,” Bucky said looking down at you, “Is this guy your boyfriend?”
“No.”, you gurgled out.
“She doesn’t know what she’s talking about! The bitch is just drunk!”, Caleb yelled as he stood up. 
Bucky however knew that wasn’t the case. You were obviously out of it, but not from alcohol, you gave away the tell tale signs of being roofied. 
After he saw you at the bar, he had been watching you. He saw your interaction with Caleb, almost getting up after the man had grabbed you, but relaxed when he saw you could handle it on your own. However when he saw you stumbling off towards the bathrooms and Caleb stalking after you, he stood up and followed the two of you, ignoring Steve asking him where he was going. 
He had entered the hallway just as the slime ball had groped you, and without thinking, Bucky decked him in the head. In all honesty Bucky hadn’t felt this angry in a while. It pissed him off to no end, seeing Caleb taking advantage of you, the shy and sweet barista he had just met the other day. 
“Y/N, oh my God what the hell happened?”, Nat appeared at the end of the hallway. 
“This jackass drugged her.”, Bucky growled, nodding in Caleb's direction.
Nat moved towards the aforementioned jackass, but was stopped by Bucky putting his arm out.
“Let me deal with him. Get her up to the V.I.P area, let Steve know what happened.”
Nodding Nat moved down to the ground, throwing your arm around her shoulder and dragging you upwards. You stumbled as the two of you walked back down the hallway, out into the club. Looking back over your shoulder you saw Bucky nearing Caleb, rolling the sleeves of his dress shirt up. 
Hazily you remember Nat heaving you to the V.I.P section. Steve immediately recognized the pair of you from the other day, and he jumped up helping Nat carry you to one of the couches. While they did so Nat explained the situation to him. 
“Tony go get her some water.”, Steve told one of the other men that had been sitting with him. 
The dark haired man turned and headed towards the bar with urgency. 
“Y/N, Nat are you guys okay?”, you heard Clint shouting from the velvet rope sectioning off the V.I.P area from the rest of the club.
“Are those your friends?”, Steve asked looking at the group that had gathered. 
“Yeah they are.”, Nat said. 
“Hey guys let them up here.”
One of the security guards by the rope lifted it up and allowed your friends through. 
“You know that guy from earlier she said was weird? Somehow he drugged her.”, Nat said to your friends.
“Where’s he at? What's he look like? I'm going to go kick his ass.”, Thor stated, turning to head back down to the dancefloor and hunt down Caleb. 
“Someone else already beat you to it.”, Nat said pointing to Bucky who had returned from the hallway.
“Sam, Scott, can the two of you go get the mess in the hallway cleaned up?”, Bucky asked as he neared everyone. 
“Gotcha.”, Sam nodded.
“What’d you do kill him?”, Nat asked gob smacked.
“No, just taught him a lesson about keeping his hands to himself.”, he said as he picked up a cocktail napkin from one of the tables, wiping blood off his knuckles. 
Your vision started blurring again and the ringing in your ears drowned out any other sounds. The last thing you remember was Bucky looking at you worriedly before you finally passed out. 
PART THREE
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I AM OPENING A TAGLIST FOR THIS STORY LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT ADDED!
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thatsmzbitchtoyou · 2 days ago
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Sugar & Spicy Books Chapter 3
Summary:  Y/N is an accomplished writer who is newly divorced, and out of fear of the unknown, moves back to her small hometown she swore she’d never come back to.  She comes across her best friend that never left, who helps her out of a tough spot.  Will old feelings arise?  Or is she just too big for such a small place now?
Warnings:  language, smut
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Y/N got into a routine with Bucky and Autumn.  On the days she picked up Autumn from school she would take her out and about to grocery shop on Mondays, accompany her to softball practice on Wednesdays, and every Friday was take out night.  She loved spending time with Autumn, and could see childhood Bucky in her whenever they would play, or in the way she smiled or laughed.  She also got to spend a lot of time with Winnie, which she was grateful for.  People around town recognized Y/N from way back when or from her books and would try to talk to her sometimes, but she always politely brushed them off whenever she was with Autumn, not wanting to be a spectacle.  Every night after they all got home, had dinner, and Autumn went to bed she and Bucky would talk for way too long, catching up and having in-depth, intellectual conversations that she missed.  She could feel that crush coming on full force as their friendship picked up right where it left off all those years ago.
Two weeks later they all came home one Friday with Bucky acting extra excited.  “Alright, Autumn!  You’re having a sleepover weekend at Grandma’s!” he announced.
“Yay!” Autumn cheered, running up to her room to gather a bag of her things.
“And you and I,” he said quietly, pointing at Y/N, “are going out.”
“Out?” Y/N smiled.  “Out where?”
“Boston,” he smirked.
“Boston?” Y/N scoffed.  “What the hell for?”
“To celebrate,” Bucky said.  “Go change into something nice but warm.  And pack an overnight bag.”
Y/N watched him walk up the stairs with wide eyes.  She quickly followed, changing into one of the nicer dresses she still owned, fixing up her hair and makeup and wearing sensible shoes, just in case.  She grabbed her fluffiest cardigan and a larger purse to carry her overnight things.  When she went back downstairs Autumn was jumping in place, holding her own bag and pillow as Bucky was fixing his hair in the mirror in the entryway.
“Daddy let’s go!” Autumn whined, then turned to Y/N and gasped dramatically.  “Y/N you look beautiful!”
Y/N smiled at her.  “Aw, thanks lovey,” she said, looking down at herself.  She looked up again at Bucky who was more dressed up than she had seen him since she came to town, looking dapper and cleaned up.  She whistled at him.  “Wow, Barnes, you really know how to clean up,” she smirked at him.
Bucky blushed at her compliment.  “Says the woman who came down looking like that,” he gestured to her.  “Looking good, Y/L/N.”
She hid her blush behind a laugh and reached out to squeeze his arm.  Autumn pulled on the sleeve of her cardigan and she quickly placated her.  “Alright, alright, let’s go.”
After dropping Autumn off the ride to Boston was two hours.  She and Bucky talked the whole way, reminiscing on old times and crazy things from their childhoods.  Bucky pulled up to a small hotel downtown, checked them in and dropped off their overnight things, then ordered an Uber.  The driver pulled up to The Bell in Hand Tavern.  “Oh Jesus, I remember this,” Y/N giggled.  “When Sam got us fake IDs and we drank way too much.  I had to haul your ass down the street before the cops came.  You were trying to kiss me the whole way.”
“I remember everything up until that point,” Bucky laughed.  “Then Steve drove us all the way home but missed the turn off and took us to Sugarbrush Farm.”
“Where you bathed in the smallest vat of maple syrup I’ve ever seen,” Y/N laughed as he helped her out of the car.  “You were sticky for weeks…Sugar.”
Bucky rolled his eyes and wound an arm around her shoulders.  He dipped his head down to her ear.  “You think you’re teasing me, but I like it when you call me Sugar,” he said.
“Oh really?” Y/N scoffed, looking at him.  Bucky arched an eyebrow at her as he steered her to the main front bar and flagged down the bartender.  “Hi, I’ll have a Jameson Black Barrel.  And she’ll have a,” he eyed her, “Nantucket Lemonade?”
“Ugh, yes,” Y/N moaned, her eyes rolling back.  “I haven’t had that in ages.”
Bucky’s eyes widened at her expression but he quickly looked back at the bartender.  “That’ll be it,” he nodded.  
When their drinks were ready he took her over to a small table by the window and they sat.  “So, what are we celebrating?” Y/N asked.
Bucky held up his glass.  “Cheers to your divorce.”
Y/N laughed loudly and clinked her glass against his.  “Cheers!” she said, drinking the cocktail.  “Fuck that’s good.”
They ate and drank the night away, laughing and talking too loud as they got more tipsy.  They didn’t notice people leaving until the bartender yelled out, “Last call!”
“Oh shit,” Bucky giggled and took out his phone.  “We gotta go, honey.”
“Aw,” Y/N whined.  “But I’m hungry!”
“We’ll find something to eat on the way back,” he smiled as he stood and helped her get up.  She leaned on him heavily as he paid the tab and then ordered another Uber.  
“How are you still standing and I’m struggling?” Y/N asked, gripping his arm tight.
“‘Cause I had two whiskeys and drank water, and you had…four cocktails?” Bucky chuckled.  
“Ugh,” Y/N groaned as he helped her into the Uber.  They convinced the Uber driver to stop by a fast food place to grab food before going to the hotel, inhaling the burgers and fries while they stumbled in and eventually found their room.
Bucky fumbled with the key card, dropping it twice while Y/N fought back fits of giggles.  When he finally opened the door they both fell inside, laughing maniacally as they sprawled out on the floor and the door shut loudly.  “Ssshhh!!” Bucky shushed her, bringing a finger to her lips.  “It’s late!”
Y/N playfully nipped at his finger, making him gasp.  “Gotcha,” she teased, before rolling over and crawling toward the bed.  Bucky crawled after her, and as she started to climb the bed he slapped her ass.  “Buck!” Y/N gasped, looking back at him.
“What?  It’s not my fault you have a great ass,” Bucky smirked.  
“Oh no, are you gonna try to have your way with me like last time?” Y/N laughed, lifting herself up onto the bed and laying flat on it.
“How dare you!  I would never take advantage of such a refined lady!” he said in a horrible British accent.  He flopped onto the bed next to her.  “Though I can assure you…you’d love it,” he winked.
“So sure of yourself,” Y/N giggled.  Her head was feeling fuzzy, the filter fully gone as she turned to face him.  He leaned on his elbows, making it so he was slightly hovering above her at the angle she put herself in.  Y/N stared at him for a moment before her hand reached up and her finger traced his lips.  “You’re a good kisser, did you know that?” she asked.
“What?” Bucky scoffed.  
“The night before I left,” Y/N frowned.  “You kissed me, remember?”
“Yeah,” Bucky nodded, blinking rapidly.  
Her thumb ran along his bottom lip, slightly pulling it down before she dropped her hand between them.  “Softest, prettiest lips,” she whispered, then closed her eyes.  “Felt like my heart was…flying that night,” she breathed.  
“Really?” Bucky’s voice sounded closer.
“Mhm,” Y/N nodded, her eyes still closed.  “Been dreaming about it ever since.”
She felt Bucky’s nose nuzzle her nose, his breath fanning her cheek.  “I liked kissing you,” he breathed.
Y/N opened her eyes, looking up to see him staring at her with a soft look in his eyes.  “Really?” she asked.  
“Been dreaming about it ever since,” he repeated her words with a smirk.
Y/N sobered up as she processed his words and the position they were in, this moment that hung precariously in the balance between friendship and something more.  She had the sudden realization that she had loved this man since she was a child, but it had just never been their time.  He had only entered her life again recently, and as different and separate as their lives had been, it was like no time had passed at all.  She wanted this.   This life, with him and Autumn, in the town that she had initially run away from.  
Bucky slowly leaned down, his gaze flickering to her lips.  “Can I…can I kiss you, honey?” he whispered, his lips ghosting over hers.
“Yes,” Y/N whispered.
He smiled, then kissed her.  Y/N sighed into the kiss, her entire body relaxing into the bed.  It was like all the stress, tension, uncertainty, how lost she felt and how big the world felt, it all disappeared and tunnel visioned into this moment.  All that mattered was that it was Bucky and he was kissing her…and it was perfect.
She wrapped her arms around his neck, her hand holding the back of his head to keep him close, scratching into his hair.  Bucky moaned at the scratch, pulling his body to completely hover over hers, his hips nestled between her legs.  Y/N got lost in his kisses, the euphoria of feeling his lips, his tongue, his teeth, his hands caressing her everywhere, his heaviness on top of her.  She didn’t realize when they’d gotten naked, but suddenly they were and she felt him everywhere she could reach.  The planes of muscles built up over time, the tuft of chest hair, his calloused fingers, and the pure pleasure at his cock rubbing between her lower lips.  
Bucky kissed down her neck, her chest, giving plenty of attention and care to her breasts, then down her stomach to her core.  He lifted her legs over his shoulders, gripping her thighs as he kissed over her clit, making her gasp and buck her hips, Bucky forcing her to stay put.  He made out with her pussy, kissing and licking it like it was the most delicious dessert he’d ever had.  Y/N’s head wrenched back as he sucked at her clit, then flicked it repeatedly with the tip of his tongue.  She was cumming in seconds, squirming in his hold as she whimpered above him.  Bucky licked and drank all she gave him.  When he helped her through the aftershocks of her orgasm he slowly pulled himself up and crawled back up to kiss her, his mouth and chin shining with her slick.  “And you call me Sugar,” he smiled as he bent down and kissed her again.
Y/N moaned at the taste of herself on his lips, her fingers scratching down his back.  “Buck please,” she breathed.  
Bucky nodded as his hand gripped his cock and slid it through her pussy again.  “I’ll take care of you, honey,” he said.  He aimed himself and started pushing forward.  Y/N slightly winced at the stretch, her hands gripping his biceps as he thrust into her.  When his hips were flush with hers he let out a grunt, his head leaning on her shoulder.  “Fuck, Y/N…you feel so fucking good.  Jesus,” he kissed her collarbone.  
“You’re amazing,” she replied.  “Please fuck me, Sugar.  Fuck me.  I can take it.”
Bucky huffed a laugh against her skin.  “I’m sure you could, honey.  And as much as I’d love to fuck you, right now I just wanna make love to you.”  He lifted his head to look at her.  “I just wanna feel you, nice and slow.  Is that okay?” he pleaded.  “I’ve wanted you for years, Y/N.  I’ve loved you for so long.”
Y/N could feel tears start to build in her eyes.  “I love you, Bucky,” she sniffled, cupping his face in her hands.  “I’ve always loved you.”
Bucky smiled wide then kissed her.  He started thrusting slowly, pulling keens and groans from her throat.  His cock felt perfect, like it was meant to be in her.  As much as she and Raf had had a mostly fulfilling sex life, it had never felt like this was him.  Bucky’s hips rolled and thrust randomly, the switch up making her eyes roll back every time.  He dug a hand under her neck, gripping her by the back of the head and the nape of the hair on her neck, forcing her head certain ways as he kissed her repeatedly.  He would nip at her jaw and her earlobe, before kissing his way back to her mouth, where the kisses would change from sweet, soft pecks to demanding, sloppy, and passionate.  She felt lightheaded at how he played her body like an instrument only he knew.
Her pussy fluttered around him, making him shudder above her, pulling away from another kiss as he gasped.  “Damn, you gonna cum for me, honey?  Cum all over my cock, huh?”  Y/N nodded like she was still drunk.  Bucky’s hips picked up the pace, his cock dragging in and out of her exquisitely.  He suddenly hauled himself up and held her against him so she was sitting in his lap, her arms and legs wrapped around him as he changed the angle and started thrusting up into her even deeper.  Y/N squealed, her nails digging into his back.  “You feel how deep I am, Y/N?  God, you’re perfect.  Most perfect pussy.  Better than I could have ever dreamed.”  He kissed her deeply again, his hand still holding her by the back of the neck and his other hand splayed on her back, holding her where he wanted her.  When he broke the kiss he leaned his forehead against her forehead and stared in her eyes.  “You’re my perfect dream, you know that?  Goddamn, I love you.”
“And you’re mine,” Y/N said, her breaths huffing against his face.  “Love you…love you, Sugar, Bucky, love you.”  She rattled on, feeling the build up in her belly.  “Mine,” she groaned.
“Yours,” Bucky nodded, his hand at her neck sliding down to her clit and flicking it with his thumb fast.  “Mine,” he nearly growled.
Y/N stiffened in his arms and came hard, shaking as it felt like lightning shooting through her veins and she cried out his name.  He buckled at how her pussy gripped his cock, falling back onto the bed with her, his hips rolling into her as he shuddered again and whimpered loudly in her ear as he came.  They held each other tightly as they calmed down, hot breaths fanning each other’s skin.  Bucky lifted his head from her shoulder and looked at her.  His gaze made her heart leap with how soft and wondrous he looked.  “Did you mean it?” he asked quietly.
“What?” Y/N frowned.
“That you love me,” Bucky said, tracing her face with his fingers.
She smiled.  “I do.  I love you, Sugar.  I’ve loved you since we were kids.  I wish I would have realized it sooner.”
Bucky smiled.  “Been dreaming about me ever since?”
Y/N laughed and smacked his shoulder.  “Yes, you little shit.”
Bucky chuckled, but his eyes looked mischievous.  “Did you think of me when you were fucking your husband?”
Y/N scoffed incredulously.  “Okay, first of all, ex-husband, and secondly, you cheeky bastard!” 
“Answer the question, honey,” Bucky said, dipping his head back down into the crook of her neck, nipping at her skin.  His hold on her tightened again, and his hips rocked into her, pulling a gasp from her lips at how he was getting hard inside her again.  
“Sometimes,” she replied breathily.  
He hummed in her ear.  “I’m gonna take real good care of you, honey.  All that sexy stuff in your books?  God, you got me feeling horny for years from your stories.  Now I’m gonna take my time and show you what it can really be like.  You want to show me how well you can take it now?”
Y/N groaned.  “Holy shit…yes!” she cried out.
Bucky chuckled darkly.  “Good girl…”
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birb--birb · 1 month ago
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Soooooo I did lich emmrich...for science..
AND IM SORRY I DONT LIKE IT HOW IS IT MORE COMON THAN SAVING MANFRED??????????
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gophergal · 3 months ago
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TFTober 4 - Provision
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harvestmoth · 1 year ago
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okay last one. au where nothing goes wrong at all ever (a lie) and melia venam gay moment
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genekies · 6 months ago
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tag vent
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#i have to move back to my hometown due to a mistake. a misunderstanding. and being too trusting in others ideas#and my boyfriend is moving an hour away as well. neither of us have been able to get a car or license yet due to money and i dont know when#we can see eachother again after we both move. since we started dating weve been sleeping in the same bed because we were/are roommates#just being gone for the weekend in my hometown is hard because i cant stand to be here but its worse because hes not in my bed every night#ive grown so used to falling alseep in his arms that i dont know what to do at night. i dont feel safe without his arms holding me#ive never felt safe where ive lived before. ive never felt safe in a relationship. ive never felt loved for who i am. that was until him.#now i feel safe in our home. i feel safe in our relationship. i feel loved for who i am. and now we have to be so far apart.#ive done long distance before but this is going to hurt so much my cat loves him she is super cautious and scared around new people but#she loved him since the start. not to mention shes my esa so that really mattered to me. he wants to move with me but it isnt happening#he got definite housing an hour away for super cheap in a town where he knows everyone and i have possible in a town where im surrounded by#people i know but am terrified of. im scared to move back here but have no choice. unless i make that terrifying choice of going with him.#the apartment he is getting is a two bedroom. id only have a studio. hes offered for me to come but im scared to move that far away again#i want to be with him but im scared to move to a whole new town with him. i know hes an amazing guy but we'd be moving away from my friends#and family. i already have to move away from all my friends if i go back to my hometown but this would be a different story.#moving to a whole new town with a guy that i only started dating 2 months ago? like yes. i lived with him previously and knew him for longer#than we dated but im still scared. i think rightfully so. but still.#but there are some pros to moving with him. hometown has no music scene and his town does and thats really important to me.#we'd also be close to his family. but farther from mine. hed be around friends and id have none no matter where i go.#idk im just rambling but i really needed to vent. i lost my best friend recently to the point of them siding with strangers almost and they#helped them break and enter into the house to intimidate me and bf and then a few days later came with cops after saying repeatedly that#they were an anarchist and acab but only when they dont use them apparently. because i guess morals/values only matter when its convenient#im so tired though but i cant sleep so i might write some cringe poetry and try to chill out before going on a late night/early morning walk#tag vent#vent in tags
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dhmis-autism · 2 years ago
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Red Guy being deluded with his crush on Duck is equally funny, me thinks
Just this feral full on rabies man Duck who commits war crimes and Red’s delusional ass goes “he is so dreamyyyyy ❤️❤️❤️”
HE'S GOT THEEE WORST TASTE AND I WILL STAND BY THAT FOREVER.
Like, Red has got his issues, but you could see why people would like him. Sooo many people have/had a crush at him at one point it's unreal. NO ONE FEELS THAT WAY ABOUT DUCK GDGDF
THERE'S SO MUCH WRONG WITH HIM... FOR GODS SAKE LOOK AT HIM.
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look at his PANTS LEG
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butnotbubblegum · 6 months ago
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using the tags to vent my current emotional state into the void bc ig story feels like a bad plan for this, read at your own risk.
#but jesus christ coming back home while already knee deep in a suicidal episode was an awful idea#like i was maybe on the verge of improving and then i came back to all of this family bullshit#and the place as well like it’s so. i don’t want to say isolated necessarily. but so much it’s own little bubble#and i spent the last eight or nine years i lived here depressed and the last six suicidal#and being back here feels like the actual place is telling me to die#and i don’t think it helps that every place i go i know or know of someone who successfully committed suicide#like. oh this person drowned themself here. or that person hung themself in these woods. or several people jumped off the side of this clif#like. it all feels like reminders of my failures. and it’s like. cmon. wouldn’t it be easy. all you need to do is jump. is slit your throat#is find a decent piece of rope. idk. but everything is so much and i just want it to stop and it feels like the ground itself#is giving me a way to do it.#i genuinely feel like i’m like 16 or 17 again. and everything that isn’t within these hills#feels like a haze and not actually real. like the concept of buxton doesn’t actually exist and my friends do not actually exist and nothing#actually exists except the place i’m in and my family and the pub#i think going back to work at the pub was a mistake; i think it’s making this worse. especially because it’s henry’s dad’s local#and where henry’s wake was. and nothing there has changed at all. it’s like the whole last year never happened.#and i only need to get through two more days but it feels like an impossible task and i keep thinking being back in york will fix me but id#if that even true like. i was suicidal before i left. and it’s going to be intense and stressful and then i have to leave again.#come back here and do three full weeks of this all over again. i haven’t even managed two yet this time around. and i feel like#such a failure and such a drain on my friends (and on one in particular) because it just#is so much and has been so long and everything is complicated and awful and i think if i hadn’t come back i’d be in a normal mental state#by now. that’s the worst fucking part. and also the whole thing of i know how to be suicidal here. i know how to not give a shit about#living here. i know how to do that. but ive never had to try before. like im trying to improve and im trying to hold on and hold off the#urges to kill myself or self harm or whatever because i said i would and because i KNOW it can be better than this and bc i love my friends#and they love me and i don’t want to upset them or make them anxious or anything like that and kat made me promise to try and im trying so#fucking hard and it feels like it’s not even worth the effort because it’s so much effort and everything is so overwhelming and awful and i#hate the way my family interacts and i just want everything to stop and idc if suicide is the cowards way out or selfish or whatever#bullshit people say it feels like the only option i can actually withstand because everything is so much pain and so much effort and so muc#everything and i can’t deal with it anymore. and also i forgot just how much i have to fucking mask in front of my parents and especially m#father and it’s so exhausting and i can’t sleep and there’s so much yelling and i just need it all to stop#i’ve had major breakdowns the last 3 nights about wanting to die so much & trying so hard to not let myself & idk how much longer i can tak
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todayisafridaynight · 9 months ago
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any hopes for kiwami 3? like things u wanna see added or changed stuff like that
if they dont keep kiryu's goofy walk stance and the hoof-like walk sounds i dont wanna play it
#snap chats#no one understands how much i love that from y3 and y4 its genuinely one of my favorite things about the game#oh but i guess i have to give an actual answer now. HMPH.#id scream if they revived kanda calling mine limp wristed. homophobia in 4k#OK BUT TO BE SERIOUS uhhhh i dont know. im a real simple guy i think#my only like. If This Isnt There Im Leaving deal is mine's palette and im so serious#rgg's scaring me with all the black-hair/purple-suit mine stuff as of late and i cant stress how hard ill vomit if thats in the final#HYPOTHETICAL final anyways. yk3 isnt coming out for. IDK A WHILE#i wanna say i hope they highlight daigo and mine's relationship more but i dont know how theyd do that#i really like how mine's handled in y3 as is so i dont think i want scenes injected like what they did with yk1 and nishiki#someone said a Mine Saga after the game and... hm ... sounds too unrealistic for me to hope for it#like im REALLY trying to think how they could possibly reference the rggo stories in y3 since those are EXCELLENT but#i think . MAYBE. you could reference the story where richardson calls mine as he's driving to the hospital#the only thing you'd have to exclude though is mine stopping by the bar- like JUST keep the phone conversation maybe#cause in that scene that subordinate does question mine if he can really kill daigo and i think thatd be neat. in my opinion.#yeah i dont know. in regards to rggo its hard to think of what i want without intervening things i already like about y3#its a real head scratcher ...#a really good epilogue addition would be adapting that RGGO bit where daigo ruminates on mine. that's a fair ending for him i think#it also fulfills the need to see how daigo saw mine even if its just a little#and to non-rggo readers it could start to answer 'how does daigo feel about everything that happened'#im still so curious as to if daigo was briefed on EVERYTHING that happened but .... anyways....#sorry all my hopes for y3 are just mine/minedai centric fLVKELKA BUT LIKE. i really am content with everything else with y3 surprisingly#idk. i want kiryu fucking up that curry in high definition tho. thats important to me#THEY HAVE TO KEEP THE QTES DURING THE RICHARDSON FIGHT ILL BE PISSED#i need the fight to be AS CAMPY and unnecessary as it was in the og. INCLUDING richardson's voice acting i need it wack as hell#is it weird i actually appreciate the Diet Building Loredumping being like. in replayable-cutscene form#i thought id prefer just One Long cutscene but im glad theres the option to skip those segments#BUT being able to get a refresher in case you missed something somehow#im running out of tags jesus christ i shouldve put this in the main text but vjALjlagj those are all my thoughts for now bYE
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talentforlying · 11 months ago
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one of these days i'm going to write up all that i've changed from azzarello's bullshit era and the one (1) piece i've kept from milligan (and also changed) and the only thing currently stopping me is that it is going to be so, so inside-baseball incomprehensible. and i almost never want to go reading/screencapping azzarello and milligan to add references but i Want to add references.
canon is goop, just know that we continue to ride the bus down "hellblazer ended at #250 and looks like swiss cheese before that" street.
#( ooc. ) OUT OF CIGS.#i'm doing page maintenance before i fuck off to work rip it's got me thinking#anyway i think i said WAY back on this blog that a side goal of mine is to make hellblazer lore accessible to non-comic readers where i can#bc it's such a Heavy comic & i love it so much & i always felt Terrible recommending it to people only for them to be disgusted#and like. @ past me that particular goal is NOT as easy as you thought it would be lmao#esp because i have a habit of getting VERY detail-oriented when it comes to talking about hellblazer i think#but by GOD it's still a goal. i can put in some motherfucking references here and there when i talk about The Lore#like. azzarello's writing style never translates well for me in synopsis bc he Loves to put the audience in the outside perspective#where we are bystanders/with the rest of the bystanders to constantine's actions and not to his motivations/inner monologue#and i HATE that. hellblazer has ALWAYS been about what this guy has going on underneath the masked exterior#all the things you can't say out loud when you're queer and working class trying to survive in 70s-80s-90s england#but that you FEEL with your WHOLE fucking chest. how that feeling drives you to enjoy little rebellions wherever you can get them#(also azzarello just fucking Sucks LMAO but i'm talking style rn)#so i end up relying on frusin's art to tell the story a little more bc i think he understands the Theatre of constantine's public persona#and when that theatre is Absent then it's really REALLY noticeable. so frusin keeps me in it most of the time#and if i'm digging into frusin art then i'm Going to want to compare it to older panels bc i like body language consistency#milligan on the other hand has NOTHING to save his sorry ass bc his writing is drop-jaw fucking terrible AND the artist seems to like it#but the loss of john's thumb being tied to his mental health (ignoring the bullshit with shade) has always felt. important to me somehow id#anyway MUCH thinking about my favorite loser on this about-to-be-annoying day shdjksd he has been done so dirty#hellblazer brain go brrrr
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dragons-and-yellow-roses · 3 months ago
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#'well you cant win em all.' okay but i would like to win at least one!! (not my quote i swear ive seen it on tumblr just cant find it)#like i would kill for just one win. i would pay a crisp $10 to anyone that could provide a single win for me#today was yet another fucking loss and that was all i had lined up. like theres nothing set up to possibly be a win in the future#ive got nothing there. so weve ended on a loss and thats all i have for the foreseeable future#i counted all the wins and losses in recent memory. ive got like 13+ losses and about 1 win#i tried to count up all of my wins but truly i managed like. one.#even some things that i didnt know could become losses! like did you know you can just be refused an adhd reassessment?#like you can say 'id like to pay $160 for you to fuck up a diagnosis again' and they can actually say#'youre not even worth the trouble to misdiagnose so go fuck yourself'#but they can! i didnt know that#and then you can have the audacity to tey to hope for something and think youll get it. like hope a little too hard#truly shouldve lesrned my lesson after twelve losses in a row not to get my hopes up#but i did! i made plans! i was gonna buy a cute water bottle specifically for that job. snd take myself out to dinner if i got it#can you guess what happened? when i had the audacity to hope and plan for a job that i was so passionate about and wanted so much?#(i didnt get it. the job ive been posting about. didnt get it)#didnt get the apartment in the city i love and miss either. didnt get an adhd reassessment (which is still wild to me)#and i tried to frame them as better in my head. 'this is a chance to tey a different job youd be better at! this is a chance to save money!'#nope its just another shitty thing in a long line of shitty things and im just getting tired of it. im so fucking tired of it#i am back where i vowed id never come back to and i cant escape in any way shape or fucking form#just needed to vent because saying all this in my head wasnt helping. saying it here doesnt help either but whatever
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voidimp · 3 months ago
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honestly as someone who never really got into lotr but independently also came up with the idea that the most sensible way to handwave everyone in a fictional setting speaking english & using terms that would have no reason to have originated in that setting is to just pretend its all a translation/localization of whatever language theyre actually speaking, it was such a relief to learn that tolkien also did that. like oh ok so im not crazy for wanting to do it that way. or like, maybe i am, but at least in the same way that a wildly successful fantasy author was, so i think im good
#like it just makes sense!! yeah you COULD go through & nitpick english so you take out all the loanwords & words with religious origin etc#anything that wouldnt make sense in the setting youre writing for. words relating to places that dont exist there. you COULD do that#(& iirc there are some authors that HAVE done things like that which is incredible i love that)#but its so much easier to just be like. well these are not the actual exact words they were saying. they were not speaking english#bc why would they be?? why would this fantasy world have english At All. even if u call it by a different name. u know??#why would they come up with the same sounds and the same alphabet and the same grammar and everything#it just makes more sense for it to not actually BE english to begin with!!!#i would love to eventually make up all the conlangs in my various settings but unfortunately i do not have the time & energy for that rn#so im just using real languages as stand-ins. which does mean i will either need to learn them or get someone to translate for me lmAO#but im fine with that. also learning more languages would make it easier to make a conlang anyway bc u have more knowledge of#language structures besides english & u can use that to add more variety..... maybe someday ill get to the point where i can do that#its always been something that interested me tbh i used to make up fake alphabets all the time but never really got much farther#they werent all exact 1:1 w a-z either like some combinations would have their own character or id omit some#god okay anyway i gotta go to work#oopsie i made the wrong word italic. i fixed it tho
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stardustdiiving · 1 year ago
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Suddenly cursed with the desire to write out detailed paragraphs about my dozen aro and/or ace headcanons for genshin characters
#fern.txt#I MAY BE OUT OF THE WOODS WITH MY HARDEST MIDTERM BUT I STILL HAVE WORK :///#genshin#see it’s sometimes hard for genshin chars bc alot of my hcs I notice go hand in hand w chars having trauma#so sometimes I less want to assign them labels n moreso have thoughts on how trauma impacts their#relationship w sexuality or romance#so sometimes I less have a hc and more like an insane introspective concept Abt this character weighing between#aroace identity vs coping and unpacking trauma#so u have a range of like my aroace hc for yoimiya is just bc she probably feels she jsut loves everyone deeply#and doesn’t rlly feel she experiences attraction that stands out compared to this sort of general love for ppl#cynonari are in a demi-aroace sort of relationship where both of them just feel very disinterested sbt romance n sex#but bc they have such a deep bond with e/o#they’re just more comfortable with kind of having some sort of relationship/dictation of e/o as a ‘partner’ of sorts#n then I have my collei hcs where I think if u talked to her Abt it#she would say she consciously thinks her relationship w attraction is rlly influenced by her trauma but she takes comfort in IDing as xyz#aro or ace identity bc she thinks it suits her n she’s ok with the fact she handles attraction differently than other ppl#I think her being around tighnari and cyno who she feels understand her experiences helps her a lot)#but then in contrast if I were to write an wanderer fic in line w my ace hcs for him#it would honestly be more of a narrative of as he has time to process n heal from trauma he moves away from the ace label more#bc I think I’d see him conclude yeah I think alot of my repulsion and detachment from attraction comes from my trauma#and while I still relate to alot of ace experiences I think it might be more helpful and accurate to how I feel#identity wise to try to repair my relationship with it#instead of resonate with the label and idea I don’t have interest in these things nor experience these attractions
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