#god okay anyway i gotta go to work
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honestly as someone who never really got into lotr but independently also came up with the idea that the most sensible way to handwave everyone in a fictional setting speaking english & using terms that would have no reason to have originated in that setting is to just pretend its all a translation/localization of whatever language theyre actually speaking, it was such a relief to learn that tolkien also did that. like oh ok so im not crazy for wanting to do it that way. or like, maybe i am, but at least in the same way that a wildly successful fantasy author was, so i think im good
#like it just makes sense!! yeah you COULD go through & nitpick english so you take out all the loanwords & words with religious origin etc#anything that wouldnt make sense in the setting youre writing for. words relating to places that dont exist there. you COULD do that#(& iirc there are some authors that HAVE done things like that which is incredible i love that)#but its so much easier to just be like. well these are not the actual exact words they were saying. they were not speaking english#bc why would they be?? why would this fantasy world have english At All. even if u call it by a different name. u know??#why would they come up with the same sounds and the same alphabet and the same grammar and everything#it just makes more sense for it to not actually BE english to begin with!!!#i would love to eventually make up all the conlangs in my various settings but unfortunately i do not have the time & energy for that rn#so im just using real languages as stand-ins. which does mean i will either need to learn them or get someone to translate for me lmAO#but im fine with that. also learning more languages would make it easier to make a conlang anyway bc u have more knowledge of#language structures besides english & u can use that to add more variety..... maybe someday ill get to the point where i can do that#its always been something that interested me tbh i used to make up fake alphabets all the time but never really got much farther#they werent all exact 1:1 w a-z either like some combinations would have their own character or id omit some#god okay anyway i gotta go to work#oopsie i made the wrong word italic. i fixed it tho
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some "new" designs for different crassus and pompey, specifically for a side project I've been playing with that's so removed from anything relevant (action/adventure/horror standalone story lmao) that they kind of needed their own thing. this story's pompey has a neck scar from an Incident™, crassus has shorter hair and wears (checks notes) jewelry sometimes.
#graves grime and gore tag#the default designs are still the ''''trikaranos''''' ones because it's nebulously like. eh. grounded enough in rome#this is the dmbj au but it's less dmbj and more like i put on every tomb robber movie on youku and went 'yeah okay'#while i was working. anyway. when i post from that story. i will make it clear that it is a separate contained story doing it's own thing#this version of crassus also more or less has black hair while my main crassus has brown hair#pompey is bottle blond no matter what universe he's in#god what else what else. it's set during their first joint consulship. crassus is more of an outright dick but it's because he's annoyed#that pompey is not getting with the program (you cannot become sulla during peace time!)#and this version of pompey is like a specific imposter syndrome anxiety has been cranked up to eleven and it's made him#overly competitive in stupid ways like the thing you think crassus is doing does not matter to him in the slightest#we gotta establish characterizations right off the bat and we're swinging big because i am NOT setting up anything prior to Events#like (snaps fingers) go explore the ruins consuls! get in the TOMB FELLAS. KEEP GOING GUYS
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Jayce and Viktor, Hidden within the Pattern—
Essays from Las siete cabritas by E. Poniatowska. (2000). (E. Coonrod Martinez, Trans.).
#elena poniatowska u were insane for this#i’ll probably make a version w the original spanish later but someone remind me#placeholder as i pace my cage (do work) instead of being able to Write like i Need To#not even about them lmao but they will tide me over. For Now.#also if anyone is weird abt this i will kill us both so help me god#ANYWAY#jayvik#jayce talis#arcane jayce#viktor arcane#arcane spoilers#he really did look like jesus for a while there it’s not my fault#okay gotta go gotta go no one look at me i have so many things i should be doing!!!!!!!!#ambivalentmarvel#arcane#web weaving
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Okay I did get distracted by a grade being posted and I am about to be both a nerd and a millennial but god ngl I do hate classes where you get full points on all your assignments but don't actually get any actual feedback on them. What is the point. If it's a class where everyone gets passing grades for making the effort but you get actual feedback and comments, that's great! But I would genuinely rather get points docked and get extensive comments on what I did well and what needed improvement and why than this.
#what is the POINT#like at that point it feels like busy work frankly! it doesn't feel like anyone's worrying about whether or not I learned something!#and like I can self reflect on my own learning. I'm good at that. that's fine. but a) not everyone can#and b) it REALLY does not help the perception that a degree is something you pay for but don't actually need to learn anything to get#which is a MASSIVE problem rn. there's no actual value placed on LEARNING THINGS.#like I know for a FACT that I have turned in B+ average assignments at best in this class.#just cuz I only have finite time and I gotta stay sane and it's not an area I'm going to go any further than surface level in.#the overview is good and important! but the work I'm doing is reflective of my investment and frankly it should've earned a B+ at most.#like at least if you're docking a point and telling me what for I know you READ the damn thing. christ alive.#you may ask yourself 'oh my god why are you like this' and the answer is. have you looked at my blog.#anyway. okay nOW I'm going to bed.
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Oh man, what is this day… what is this *week*?
School isn’t the worst of it, really -it’s everything outside of it that’s made this week crazy. Yes, I have horror stories from the ER, but it’s also been the week of *gross* cases that I’m not gonna repeat, other than that the mop has been out every other minute, and I walked right into it before my shift even started on Thursday morning at 5:45 AM!
#pardon my insanity#it’s been a hectic week in the ER… but most of the craziness isn’t even related to school#okay… if I’m gonna work ER I’ve decided I actually like night shift better than crack-of-dawn early shift#I have to get up so early again tomorrow but I need my emotional support bands after today… so I’m gonna stay up late anyway#I have Monday and Tuesday off but I still have to go see a doctor at a referral place to deal with this little health scare that came up 😬#it’ll all be easier once that’s dealt with -IF it’s not serious#my mom is okay after the car accident last week so no injuries with delayed symptoms thank god… but the car did not make it :(#and the stupid laundry app glitch triggered a security alert that canceled my credit card with no warning… so I gotta get a new one#lots of fun!#vet school life#and whatever the heck this is in the time I’m not at school
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so i didn't finish the paper on time but on the plus side i Almost know how to play mahjong now
#im like 8 volumes into kaiji pt 3#which is 50 chapters deeper than i was the day before#anyway it's good but im definitely going to it as part of a sluggish avert mine eyes type dopamine struggle#i also havent slept well in a few days and ive become a total baby when it comes to that like i Cant function right anymore#when im a certain amount of tired#the like 12 hours in the car this weekend didn't help with the good restful sleep thing#i fought and fought and fought myself and in the end it's just gonna be a day late. mot that it had to be but it will be#and although i can't see the prof's late work policy i think that's gonna be okay. hopefully#but ughhtjhfhhghjghj im so tired still. ive been sleeping in like 20 min fragments trying to get this done#just woke up from a cool three hours and im (believe it or not) still tired#i havent done the 40 pg reading and i am NOT bullshitting my way through that class i am going. to bed#i know i shouldnt but i cant care rn i'll drag myself to japn and do late work all afternoon but i gotta sleep between those#anyway fukum.oto has a special way of making kaiji cringe that makes me extra fond#like watching kaiji scramble around on the floor trying to find his tiles absolutely freaking out and everyone laughing at him#was so good. he was being too confident this arc he needed to be reduced to smth horribly pitiful that he has to drag himself back together#from y'know? thats part of the fun#ANYWAY i couldn't do that shit kaiji and miyoshi are doing for many reasons but the attention span sure is one#also idk if it's the translation or what but the r slur keeps jumpscaring me in ways that are funny to me for the absurdity#thats a chapter title??? that Doesn't Belong in the chapter title??????!!! anyway#yk when you're so surprised and put off by smth you just. cackle about it? like laughing at a funeral or whatever#it's like that#buh. anyway god im so tired#ive been doing so well this semester but it looks like it's starting. the snowballing.#well hopefully i can dig myself out today after a 14 hr nap. get all that late work And my readings done yk#(<- pipe dream alert pipe dream alert)
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@ mazzy hewwo good morning thank you for showing us dragons!! :3 <33 <22 we enjoy seeing your fIight escapades :3!!
however we also got four other asks last night apparently and we don't know how to answer one of them and the other is an anon's music recs so w. [pauses quietly. clasps hands together.] we're gonna have to take a quick rain check on this one chief!!
#we never know if y'all would like updates hjglkj we never want y'all to think we're ignoring y'all or something? we lov y'all hjglkj#--------------------------------------------#(okay y'all don't have to read the rest of this if y'all don't want to it's just us chattering like usual. do NOT feel obliged hjlkjg)#stares at one of the asks. okay 1) i don't think we're qualified to answer this?? we can certainly try but we do not have those things :']#i feel like answering this is swinging a bat at a wasp nest hgkjf 2) /how do we answer this without letting people know we're plural/ hgjlk#also people really love giving us music recs its wild truly hjglkj but we're grateful!! we always are <33#other two are just sweet messages <33 people are so kind to us i'll cry about it hgkj :'> <33#drafts are at 1818 my god we're trying our best. i mean we still want to reblog everyones skiIItobers thats how late we are raughhh hjglkj#our gamer friends are going to be tiering for about a week so we gotta help them when we can#and we gotta DRAW THINGS!!! our to-do list extends past the stars. and we are still tired.. maestro will probably make a to-do list later..#lovessss being pedantic. guy whose idea of fun is organizing a spreadsheet. my god dude hgkj#we want to doodle things for the other two asks we always like doing that :] maybe emmy and... i think reactspeed could be fun?#we could make it work hjglkj#Make sure we eat.#ohhh right we have a body that needs food. jesus hkjg anyway here are tasks!! lets go do them!!
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Are you ok? What happened?
Yeah I'm chilling lmao we just had a patient presenting with a condition I'd never seen in person and it didn't end well for them unfortunately
#not snz#I'm lucky enough to have been unfazed by almost everything I've seen in the field so far#so i was basically just interested in the weird medical shit that was going down lmao#for my fellow medical people we got a pt with an AAA that ruptured before transport could even arrive#so I'm sure y'all can guess what happened#but it looks so wild?? like in my head i knew it would probably look some type of way but it was crazy to see#tragic part about being super interested in medicine is that you can't go :0 in front of an audience#like you can but then they'll think you're heartless or bad at your job or something#like no I'm just not emotionally invested in the situation bc idk who this person is lmao#anyway rip to my one coworker who we all had to watch play tetris after#she's okay she was just really feeling the adrenaline#and we did all go out for ice cream lmao gotta do some serious team bonding after that#god i love fire and ems we say the most fucked up shit then laugh about it bc what else can you even do tbh#so anyway yeah I'm all good I'm just still going :0 about the medicine part of it lmao#and i got to tell my other ems buddies so 😌#work tag
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oh also headsup to everyone that i will be TRYING to see if i can’t catch the new bravern ep earlier than i usually do tomorrow so y’know. beware the Posts
#like i wont be able to focus on anything once it drops anyways so like. MIGHT AS WELL#i could barely focus on anything today tbh. LMAO#i don’t even know why i’m so anxious like i fully trust that it will be good and satisfying and i have zero expectations plotwise#i just want isami to be happy i think 😭 he and lulu#either way tho it’s been such a fun time keeping up w this show :]#like i’m rly glad to watch it while it was airing and see all the fanarts and talk abt silly theories w my friends and make Posts#and i still do think ep9 in particular maybe even elevates this to like. fav stories ever been told type of deal#like recency bias ofc but also. bravern himself is SO 😭#anyways. LMAO#t.txt#what a special show :]#OH MY GOD WAIT I DO WANNA SAY#WHOEVER GOT THAT GIF OF MINE TO BE LIKE ONE OF THE FIRST BRAVERN GIFS IN TWITTER SEARCH#THANK YOU BUT WHY IS IT ONLY SEVEN PIXELS 😭 EVERY TIME I SEE IT I CRINGE#wait also again i lied earlier on. rip. i actually DO expect smith/bv to come back in some fashion#like i’d bet money on that. but like. i do also trust the show to make it work if he Doesn’t ykwim?#its just one of those scenarios where it’ll be like. happy ending: will make me very happy#bittersweet ending: will stay with me forever and ever and ever and ever and ever an#okay sorry for editing this post four millioj times i gotta go do chores
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need to be exploding something but i Can't for some reason. just Can Not. my ability to do is just. Nay
#just me hi#GOUHHH#okay so I can't go back to bed rn cuz I was So tired earlier I went to bed at 7#Bad move !! But I also didn't have anything to do so kind of the only one lmao#So I slept for 4 hours and here I am now. At 2 am. Vibing [<- this is untrue]#I have Energy that I Need to dedicate to SOMETHING but I can't figure out what so I'm just vibrating really aggressively and pacing kfvshf#I could funkin writeeeee but I don't know what and i don't think I'll be able to focus so lmaoo 💥#// 💥🎶NONSTOP AUTOMATIC LIVIN IN DELUSION🎶💥#anywho loll--#//i could draw but that's Slow and Caramalizing work. Like when I want to evenly toast my thoughts you know what I'm saying kfshf#Or when I'm just trying to be Thourough. Or just rotating shiz so fast I gotta slow down lol#And then if I draw what should it be? The things in my brain ??? God forbid#What I'm just sposed to pick between the 3+ projects I have blasting at full volume in my head rn ?? That's crazy talk man#//mnm i want. a Snack#Snack tiymeeee#If only we had those kfshvfh#Ik where to get marshmallows (thought they could hide them from me. Impossible) but that's not a good choice for the hour or the craving lo#//what's the point !!! What's the pooooint !!! 🎶#i love you music hfvsh#/speaking of i took my mp3 player w/ me to skate w/ and played oldies and you know that was pretty good man I gotta do that again#Meant to do it last time but I didn't charge her :( and I don't want to stress her battery by killing her so </3#//oh also we went to the movies today !! Part of the reason I'm tired lmao#I always forget to bring smth to plug my ears (it's so funkin loudddd man oTL) but you know what I Didn't forget? Mp3 player w/ the noise#Canceling earbuds. Which worked insanely well I had Zero discomfort :D#Usually the theater experience starts to suck hard at abt the 2/3rds point cuz everything gets loud ;w;#but i forgot abt the sound thing w/ my buds in so :D yay yippee !!#We watched gladiator 2 :) watched the first one the night before so full context let's go 💥#It was good! I think anyway! I'm not sure i was completely clocked in kfshfh#//ooou I'm running out of tag space..#I'll say ciao right here loll :> toodles !!
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save me.
#ok wait real quick. im really too tired. the first thing i typed was '2b' which. is not what i want to talk about. im out of everythingg#ok so i got back at. 1.40 am last night. sure.#but. ive got my shift today starting at 12.30pm. aka i gotta be ready at 12.#which means i shouldve started lunch at 11.30. but since i got back so late this is also when i just finished my breakfast.#aka my tummy full i cant eat lunch.#erm.#so im hoping that this wont cause problems =w=bb#sillyposting#anyway thats not my main trouble today.#ive got. almost 5 hours of kids waiting for me.#theres a saint nik performance today. twice.#ohohoooo.....#at least the woman im working with is nicey =w=b plus she also worked last nights shift so were in the same boatt. erm.#anyway even THAT. would be fine.#except.#my old boss invited me to a going-away party. and i dont fucking want to go.#itll be god knows how long masking. itll be holding back tears bc i am bad with separations. just. everything im imagining it will be is ba#oh.#yk this is the exact same thing i had when i had a bbq with them. imagining itll all be bad and it being. actually okay.#TBF. that was because gay things were happening.#fuck i still cant believe i fumbled that chance noo.......#its fine.#but yeagh. not looking forward to today.#its not like im already stressed about everything school or summ :)#how do people LIVE. i fucking cant.
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i Do think it's funny how much dead bean drop has specifically like... been such a starting point of everything that's been going on in my mind but they really did just manage to hit a bullseye being all like "oh yeah and lumpus and slinkman went to camp together as kids" like Ugh. You can't just say that to me. Come on. look at this Stupid thing
"and there's so much potential there" - ME ABOUT PRETTY MUCH ANYTHING I'VE EVER GOTTEN MY HANDS ON
#talk#camp lazlo#i love his big silly hair so much#stuff i wanna clean up my thoughts and post about eventually:#slinkman's “pull yourself together; this is who you are” scene and how things like that tie into the rest of his issues#LIKE#sorry i can't even mention that and not go off about it but ohhh my god slinkman#LIKE THESE LITTLE CHARACTERIZATION DOTS FOR HIM ARE SO LIKE... CLEAN? I GUESS?#they really do all feel so connected#i seriously gotta just go and work on my notes though i just wanted to repost at least a little art#before i actually got into it all cus i'm still not sure how many people are interested#and it's a lot to go through like#Guys#i can't go a few days without amassing like another 6k words in notes which is actually kind of annoying!#and this is why every year i get sucked in for a while again because i'm just looking stuff over like#Okay... That's kind of Genius...#nauseous typing this and remembering ''what did YOU put in your time capsule scoutmaster lumpus? :)'' ''my youth 😒'' (beat)#or whatever#ANYWAY#i love this episode cus its a lot for me to chew on and also so crazy in so many ways honestly#and lumpus truly kills me when it's such a ''WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH HIM'' thing but Oh. Oh i know exactly what's Wrong with him ❤️
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Scum Villain’s Survival Guide where it’s Shen Jiu as the transmigrator. SJ gets tracked into this “Make The Target Happy!” mission system and is so resentful that at the end of every success he pulls the plug and ruins his target’s life, and it’s not technically against the rules is it? But now he’s gotta go back and right all his wrongs—there’s the demon lord he betrayed and killed, the war hero who thinks he’s an alien agent who betrayed humanity, etc. etc. At the end of the day it’s all about growth—he panics at the thought that he’s responsible for another person’s happiness so he’d rather crush it himself. Righting every wrong involves actually baring a part of himself and it’s mortifying and horrifying to let someone else choose to love him.
#plot stockpile#the real question is who is the system#SY or SQH#it’s gotta be SQH right? god!System#SJ is his test case kinda like The Good Place#but he’s kinda panicking cause SJ’s going wayyyyy off script but that’s okay he can uhhh make it work#he can make growth happen! for his son!!!!!#and SY makes a better 渣攻 anyways lol he’s got the 少爺 backstory#it’s gotta loop back to Qi-ge tho#I haven’t gotten to the end of Scum Shou’s Guide yet so I dunno what the convergence plot will be#but pull The other book in here#Qi-ge is his last 心結#the root cause of all his emotional problems lol#but somehow all the other 攻s come through and have happy harem times#also who is MBJ#how do we get him to SQH
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yeah I'm not gonna talk abt it am I...
#well thats okay. eventually itll come up naturally. and if not well. it doesnt make me feel very okay. but its not a big deal#and i guess ill meet ppl in the future who will curate a different idea of me and maybe therell be fewer misunderstandings#<- coward who CAN communicate to save their life but not in any lower stakes situation for their happiness n quality of life#we <3 repression n insecurity. maybe if i keep digging at the corner of this bit of the labyrinth with my spoon ill get out someday 😌#anyway.. theres my daily vague vent post got it out of my system#wanted to do it earlier but ended up not having much time after work n then called friends which was nice :^)#also i never have signal at work these days.. my boss has said shell get me on the staff wifi tho cuz i do need it for work reasons#its rare to need it for work purposes bc we all use work pcs n stuff anyway and not rly supposed to use mobiles in the lab#but yeahh.. god i have so much admin shit to sort out also gotta text family back before i sleep i forgot to earlier#its all good.. also my memory foam pillows turned up so i no longer have to steal my roomies extra one for my neck pain <3#ik she was missing it... not to sound like a creep but it was nice that it smelled like her a little. just familiar innit#we're always around each other so its just what being home smells like to me.. listen i have a sensitive nose 😔✋️#if we were a lot closer i would ask if i could sleep in her bed while shes away but we're not so it would come across sooo weird..#and i would feel rly weird abt someone sleeping in my own room without me there. well maybe not actually. as long as they werent snooping#<- guy whose mother used to go thru their shit all the time n struggles to not feel paranoid and distrustful when it comes to privacy#was thinking recently my ideal living situation w a partner would be separate rooms but we still share the bed sometimes#but not every night bc im a sensitive sleeper... but we can switch bedding so i can still smell them if i wake up in the night alone#like how new mothers trying to get babies used to cot sleeping each have a cloth or blanket and swap every night#so the baby is comforted by the blankets smell and sleeps more peacefully.. and momma finds it easier being apart from the baby too#sorry this is getting gooey and weird my meds have been wearing off the last couple hours im so sleeppyyyy 😭#well.... maybe everything can wait until tomorrow..... bed is calling..#goodnight everyone muah#.diaries
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"if i finish this i will watch a horror movie" thing kinda backfired it's 9pm lmao
#will i still do it. yes. probably.#it would probably be more fun in the night too so yeah#but god fucking damn it can i please just finish this thing#i cant even be properly mad at myself because ive been Actually Working in these last days lol#at last!!!#it feels like i can actually finish the whole thing next week :')#i started this at the beginning of September goddddddddd 😭😭#if i took it more seriously from the start it would've been done by now lol#but i guess at least im making progress#i am kinda getting nervous thinking abt deadlines and actually applying even tho i still have like a month for one school#and 2+ months for others lol#there's one in italy that's earlier than that but not sure if i wanna go for that one tbh so........ idk#but since it's wayy cheaper and i dont have many cheap options and i fear the same thing (aka not being able to go bc#of money) will happen again this year lol#so yeah just. not sure in general.#if i think too much about any of this i start to question everything anyway lmao so i shouldnt <3#i gotta visit my old uni to talk abt some letters too which i Know for a fact they would write#but it's so nerve wracking to think about butttt i gotta do it this week/early next week so.....#(this week means actually the next week in this case i guess lmao since it's friday rn)#bc they said 2 weeks notice sooooo im guessing that would be okay but u knowwwwwww ugh#okay. my goal is to just do this thing today#then finish the whole project tomorrow#then do the other readjustments for the other projects in a few days hopefully#then go to school#yeah. doable. perfectly doable#i gotta arrange the (redacted) and (redacted) meetings too lol buttttt yeah#🗒#wow i didnt intend to write this much tbh anyway
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ooooh this is such a scam [<- looking up references]
#just me hi#i just wanna be sure i'm using the right words but if you wanna find images that match the word you're using to describe you might as well#retire lgflfhshvh#guess i'm going vibes-based?? but i don't waaaaaaant tooooooo gfhfsh#you look up Anything about an amab body and it's all bodybuilding stuff like come ONNN#i don't even LIKE muscle this is just ANNOYING hfsfhvvb#you look up afab stuff and they don't getttt ittttt they don't get itttttttttttttttttttttttttt [dies very dramatically]#thank god incognito searching exists btw bc anybody who saw my searches rn would assume some very particular things about myself that i.#Well. hghhfhshfvhjsk#i canNOT let leo see these tabs i think that'd finally be it for me. i'd be ruined ljfsj#/i hate everythinggg [<- did another search]#/OH I GOT IT !!! YIPPEE :DD#[boogies down] [wiggles] [confetti]#/okay yea so i'm tryna work on character descs for the pi.e quartet + the rest of the cast (the more prevalent ones anyway lol) and oo#//hang on gotta change my music - i'm trying some stuff out rn but it's so distracting lmao#/anyway yea so i'm hyped for this !! :D#so hyped that between the last tag and this one i just wandered off for about 10 minutes and was writing it so bfbshv#so i'm gonna go do that!! kinda everywhere today but i'm gonna get this done :3#ehe toodles
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