#that worked last time i had this issue so idk what's happening now :/
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things aren’t going well with peach. while i think my dad’s very right to be concerned that she hasn’t eaten anything in nearly 60 hours (obviously i am too), im becoming increasingly concerned that she hasn’t slept at all in around 36 hours and prior to that she was under anaesthetic, which isn’t exactly restful, so it’s closer to 48 hrs
like dad took her back to the vet today and we’ve got injections for her painkillers now because she’s not eating, and also injections for fluids (because she doesn’t drink; she only gets water from her food), so the not eating is Bad but also kinda under management, but if she doesn’t sleep soon i’m extremely worried. dad was like ‘if she doesn’t eat by tomorrow afternoon we’ll take her back because the injections will run out’ but like. if she doesn’t sleep tonight we have GOT to take her back first thing in the morning so they can sedate her or something
#her pain doesn’t seem to be too bad now that she’s got pain relief so idk what’s stopping her from sleeping#she won’t even lie down unless i’m sitting next to her. she just sits there staring out the window#her pupils are also taking up her entire eyes and have been all day#that’ll be a side effect of the medication and maybe the lack of sleep? but it won’t be making her feel any better#she can probably barely see at this point#like imagine you’ve been awake for 2 days after surgery and you’re in a lot of pain and haven’t eaten since before surgery#and are also on strong painkillers. and you also have no idea what’s wrong with you or why everyone’s doing things that hurt you#bruh your brain would be COOKED. there’s no way she has any idea what’s going on rn but she’s clearly feeling terrible#personal#like i think she’ll be ok in the long-term but she’s gotta somehow get through all these immediate issues#last time something like this happened she stopped drinking and never started again#not eating or sleeping don’t have workarounds as simple as putting water in her food#it really doesn’t help that there’s so much other shit going on rn#i’m doing a whole bunch of stuff with my phone and computer that’s taking a lot of work#but also my sister’s going on a long overseas trip that she’s leaving for tomorrow#so the combo of dad and sister coming and going constantly and also like 6 random deliveries for tech stuff in the last 2 days—#has the dogs really wound up. so georgie’s been howling at absolutely everything#and it’s rainy so my clothes aren’t trying and they’re hanging on a rack hooked on the hallway door so the door can’t close#which puts one less door between my room and the dogs so they’re waking me up every time anything happens#and i sleep during the day so that’s ALL THE TIME. i’ve had like 8 hrs of sleep between the last two afternoons#my sister always has so much random life stuff she wants to talk about and was getting really annoyed that i wasn’t very receptive#like ‘im about to go away for 3 months’ sorry i know its a big thing but i can’t just reschedule peach’s medical emergency
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sorry my posts suck today i have a headache and im stressed about my doctors appiintment tomorrow and its making me stupid. in my brain
#.pdf#rd#worried about not being taken seriously when i say ive had these issues for like a year. cos ive never brought it up before because they-#-were so comparatively mild that i thought it was just chronic work stress manifesting as brief illness episodes. and i was embarrassed-#-about being so stressed out by my simple part-time flexible-schedule job. i thought it would be stupid to complain about something tjat-#-“happens to everyone” and that i had “no reason to be this stressed”#so now i have to go and be like ummmm. hi dr. im stupid and ummm 🥺 i know i said i was doing fine but i think i was wrong i sick now#which makes me feel like im making it the fuck up. like im a “healthy” 22 year old with normal bloodwork im scared shes gonna dismiss me-#-when i say that ive picked up on a symptom pattern characteristic of me/cfs and over the past 3 months its gotten so bad i can barely work#my mother also wants me to ask for a referral to a place that does POTS testing bcos i have some of those symptoms as well#and im concerned about going “heyy i know i was like fine last year but do you think i might have TWO entire chronic illnesses perhaps”#cos ive seen. so many stupid comments from doctors and nurses on reddit tiktok etc saying patients “like me” are faking/attention seeking#scary..#grrrrrrrr. what ever. idk just wish me luck i guess
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also (this is it i promise) this is why i am so INSANELY excited to have my own room soon. like omg. it is definitely not perfect bc it’s at home and there’s a breaker box in it and you can hear footsteps really loud through the ceiling and also again *it’s at home* when i really need to not be living at home. but the quality of life improvement i am about to have is actually INSANE. i will be able to have a space far away from everyone else where i can sing without bothering anyone and play piano and decorate it (mostly) to my liking and have a desk and draw and paint and do whatever. finally!!!!!!!! that is going to fix me!!!!!
#purrs#i just wish it was permanent or that i had more years to spend in it. like i actually just want to find the place where i will live forever#and just stay there bc oh my GOD am i tired of living in places temporarily. i have so many issues w that bc so many spaces that were#formative for me have been destroyed (e.g. the van 😍😍😍😍 and my grandparents house 😍😍😍😍 and my favorite hs teachers classroom 😍😍😍😍) or are#going to be destroyed (e.g. the office where i work rn 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍) or ive had to leave them and move out bc they’re inherently temporary (e.g.#my on campus room 😍😍😍😍 and my room in brighton 😍😍😍😍😍😍). and ive had attachment issues w space / location : whatever my whole life like i wou#would have huge meltdowns whenever we were transitioning from like elementary school to middle school middle school to high school etc etc..#so i really just um. would like permanence and stability please. im 24. im done w school for now and maybe forever. i want to find a place w#where i can just like.. stay. so if im paying rent like something that would allow me to renew it indefinitely and not fear bei ng kicked#out randomly or at the end of a determined period. i just want a home lol i want a homeeeee and i want to decorate it with all my things and#never be afraid that i will lose it and get to stay there forever and ever or at least as long as i want. bc my parents already have plans f#for my new room after i move out and i won’t get to decorate it as much as i want bc my mom doesn’t want me to damage the paint. but like if#i have a place of my own then i get to decide a little ding in the paint is worth it to put up my lanterns. you know? idk. the mortifying#ordeal of experiencing freedom like thisfor the first time in my mid-late twenties probably 😍😍😍😍😍😍 but still its gonna be good and i hope it#happens soon and i have to MAKE that happen. so yeah.#wishlist#delete later#ok now im done for real THJS time lol. my mom is gonna be so pissed at me ive barely lifted a finger here. but im enjoying the quiet what ca#can i say!!!!!!!! like OMG ok last thi ng…. like she’s always saying i have to love myself first before i get into a relationship and it’s l#like.. maybe my living conditions do not predispose me to be able to spend time w myself in ways that allow me to love myself!!!!!!#maybe always being on the defense and needing to find quiet spaces all the time and being shamed for that is not a very good way to experien#experience myself in the place im supposed to feel most grounded and comfortable!!! so yeah.#like maybe i stopped doing all the things i loved bc you got alexa and loud speakers and started blasting music all the time and dominating#space and becoming more and more high maintenance… 😳 (and obviously i changed as a person / played a role in it too but again my point / re#realization is… maybe it was in RESPONSE to stimuli that were not good for me and not just bc i suck as a person / am losing myself / etc.)#like theeeee sonic warfare of it all. also my brother is a key player in it too bc he raps and sings at the top of his lungs and it’s like 🤨
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i am having a genuine core memory type of bad day today like serious SERIOUS things are going down and i missed a flight because genuine life changing events are happening and got put on standby for another which got delayed multiple times til i would’ve missed my connecting flight home and anyways it was overbooked so i didn’t make it on, and then now five hours after they left me at the airport im finally heading home and i was like “well at least i can eat the fries i bought that i didn’t get to eat yesterday” but my useless cousin who has not only been completely useless through this weeks long ordeal but has also been making things worse stepped in and ate the whole giant box of fries cause he “thought we were leaving” even though my mom clearly left half her stuff behind at the house and told him we did not make our flight so she was going to stay in town and try and get me home and also this whole situation (except for the fries) is straight up my fault cause i didn’t wanna get out of bed for 20 minutes when we woke up and like normally this would be fine especially since i went to bed at 2 am packing suitcases and then had to wake up at 7 and also slept super poorly anyways but i still have no self discipline and everything has gone wrong because of that
#i should be freshly showered and in bed right now having a good cry#i’m genuinely seething at my cousin btw we keep asking him to do the most basic things and he makes some excuse#and then it turns out to be a lie#like my cousin is stronger/bigger than i am so my mom wanted his help w the suitcases#and we went out for one last dinner last night but he kept telling my mom he wanted to go home and sleep bc his job starts early#and getting irritated at her when she tried to take two minutes to finish eating#anyways we went home early and he did not go to bed. we could hear him gaming and yelling at the computer til we went to bed at 2 am#and his job starts at 3 am so he can’t have actually been worried about sleeping#oh he also just didn’t go to work and this is like a repeated occurrence#and he didn’t bother seeing us off to the airport or wake up til like 11#when i called him saying we needed him to bring my passport and it was an emergency#idk this all seems like super trivial but my mom is straight up handling a tragedy alone#i won’t deny that i haven’t really been useful but i’ve been coming along everywhere on top of remote working from here#meanwhile he’s kinda just been at home gaming and not leaving his room#i can kind of excuse his brother who’s also been at home but he’s also like super obviously been prepping for a super rough final and idk#ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. can you at least have some decency and like#try not to pile more work on my mother who is dealing with one of the worst things that can happen to her#and try to use your parents not being around as an excuse to run around town with your friends#while lying to my mom and saying you need to sleep or work or yeah you’ll be straight home (you’re going for lunch with your buds)#i mentioned something about how i’ve spent time with him instead of my friends when he’s visiting us and he was like ‘you have friends?’#i don’t know man i can’t cry in bed i can’t sleep cause they keep the house cold#basic functioning is making me miserable with the brain issues i don’t know what to do#cause if i go home im going to be in the exact same situation just#with a better bathroom and a guitar and feeling useless and sad because i can’t help#anyways i need to text my boss to let her know no shot i can make it tomorrow#which feels awful cause i was supposed to get back A WEEK AGO i had to extend i hate it here i hate it here i hate it here
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#the whole vet situation gives me such trauma whiplash im too busy with that that i havent really given myself a chance to process today#all i can think about is how painful eating must be for mischa#i noticed she slowed down a bit and wouldnt eat kibble or hard snacks but i thought it might be one single tooth ache idk#i actually thought she was doing better because she slowed down because she has been gulping down food way too fast since the shelter#the last time she had tooth problems like 2-3 years ago i asked a friend to come with me to the vet and she said omg yes of course#and then she resumed texting me normal stuff throughout the day of the appointment and only after i didnt reply the whole day she noticed#like 10 hours too late she was like OH SHIT HAHA!! and this is literally what happens every time when i ask someone to be there for me#when i make myself really vulnerable and ask for help and say that i cant do something alone they let me down#while knowing that i have no one else#i asked my mom to come to the vet once and she literally only talked about herself the whole time distracting me#and then she was like haha yeah lets just drop off the cat at home and go get some lunch hihi!!!!#she never remembers vet appointments even when we just talked about them and loves making fun of me for being stressed and tense#like OH NO WONDER YOU WERE MOODY like im on my period or something#i texted a friend about mischas health issues and me losing my job and she hasnt replied since january and doesnt really talk to me anymore#so i guess that friendship is done too#ill have to go there on thursday alone and overdraft my account and wait until the evening and care for mischa all alone#i cant even talk with someone about this because no one understands or judges my emotions and no one cares anyway#and then ill have to go back to work where everyone knows that i will be gone soon and will pester me about it#they all think of me as a temporary intern anyway and ask WHEN WILL YOU GO FIND A REAL JOB while they make me do theirs#everything and everyone at that job is so horrible and so many people leave and they never learn#a colleague i helped teaching everything suddenly turned on me &my other colleague & made our lives miserable while badmouthing us viciously#and everyone in the office chose her over us and let her get away with it while she screamed at us and behaved like a child#its so ironic how i stayed because i needed money to live and now when i go i will have 0 because of the surgery#i mean its worth it but like#what the fuck is life and what will it fucking be next month
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modern!husband!steve harrington x wife!you
2,603 words
warnings: so like, technically, you don't have to read "We'll Call It Love" , my modern steve series, BUT you're missing soooooo much that got these two idiots here, so I really encourage you to do so. This scene is so so so much more fun if you know all that led up to it, I promise. anyways: | alcohol mentions, slight descriptions of use by reader | smut (public - you get caught *kind of* / fingering / piv unprotected intercourse - creampie / wife,mom,breeding, all the kinks from one Mr. Harrington) - 18+ as always
a blurb for the "Trick or Treat, Freak?" event - don't forget to vote for tomorrow at the bottom of the fic!
A/N: I just wanted to say again, thanks for loving We'll Call It Love so much. I actually got to go see the band COIN last night, the music that inspired the fic, the screenplay, and just...wow. I don't have other words for it. Idk, feeling very sappy for all of you today and this story that means so much to me. Thanks for being here, it was fun to revisit these two 💛 and *now* I'm done with them.
Probably.
The day hadn’t been without its issues, but he’d expect nothing less, when it comes to the two of you.
First, there was Eddie’s girlfriend showing up in fake blood, late, covered in swatches of dark and gory fake gashes and goo all down her arms as she frantically rushed past him and shouted something about busy season and don’t worry, his bride was gonna look beautiful and not in a tragically haunting poetic way but in a romantic sunset kissed glowing kind of way.
Which, you did.
But then, there was an issue with the cake, which, wasn’t supposed to be a cake, but a bunch of peach pies. Robin and Nancy were whispering loud enough to bring him into the kitchen, both of their mouths snapped shut as Steve blinked at the largest solitary pie he’d ever seen. It was massive, comically so, and Robin was waving her hands at him, it’s going be fine spilling out of her lips that had just been freshly glossed for photos. Nancy was on the phone with a bakery and then Eddie was stumbling through the door shouting about canceling the order. He smiled at Steve and told him that you started crying which made him frown and start towards the direction Eddie had just come from, but his groomsman and your best man stopped him, assured him that then you started laughing, that you said your parents would have loved it.
Which, ultimately led to issue number three.
Robin had approached him slowly, fixing his tie, before she whispered that they couldn’t find you, but that there was a note, with his name on it. He had grabbed it with trembling fingers, only to find it didn’t say anything like sorry or I can’t do this, but a quote:
“I’ll have what she’s having.”
He rushed past Robin, shouted about being right back.
Steve found you on a balcony, which took a little bit of work, asking the front desk if anyone booked a room under Buttercup, or Allie, Kate, and ultimately Sally Albright. Then they wouldn’t give him the room number till he confirmed his name was Harry Albright, not Harry Burns. His breath caught in his chest when you turned to look at him, chin quivering and a quiet greeting for him before you started crying. It all ended alright, after you talked about your parents and him and all of it and he kissed you and made a joke about wedding curses. If seeing you in your dress before the ceremony already happened, where was the harm in a sunset balcony quickie?
You didn’t go for it that time, only grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the room with you, asking if he was ready to get married.
Which he really fucking was.
The floor to ceiling windows overlooking the skyline had been good in theory, letting in the beautiful, breathtaking sunset as you said your vows. But they also let in the warmth, the room an oven, leading you to laughing during the ceremony and swiping at his temple with your handkerchief and Eddie fanning Robin while she officiated. And cried.
There was so much crying.
But it was perfect.
You were perfect.
“Sir?”
Steve blinked away from where he was watching you take pictures in the vintage photobooth, you, Robin, Nancy, and Eddie’s girlfriend were all crammed in, sitting on each other’s laps, to the attendant in front of him.
Perfect, but distracting.
“So sorry, what did you ask?”
The venue employee smiled, like he knew the look on Steve’s face well, and then he shook his head. “Nothing to apologize for, sir. I was just letting you know that all the gifts are put away and locked in the car downstairs as instructed by your wife. Anything else I can do for you?”
His wife.
Steve looked over at you again, sighing as you tilted your head back in a laugh at the images in Robin’s hand.
He smiled at the man in front of him and shook his hand, “No, thank you.”
You felt him before you saw him, or rather, smelt him.
Your body spun to find the source of the salty and fried scent to see Steve holding a container of fresh french fries and a smile and eyes that seemed to be perfectly made, and only for you.
“Hey Mrs. Harrington,” he kissed your cheek, lips lingered against your skin as he asked, “Hungry?”
“Starving,” you groaned, your body crumpled against his as you exchanged your glass of champagne for the fries you knew would end up being a great late night snack offered. Warmth filled your stomach at the sound of your new last name, like a lovesick idiot you swore you’d never be.
Steve lifted a fry to your mouth, eyes a deep burnt amber in the low reception lighting as he watched your lips part and steal the fry from between his fingers, his tongue with a mind of it’s own, swiping out over his bottom lip as yours brushed the pad of his thumb.
You snorted.
“You’re so easy, Harrington.”
Steve lifted the fries away from you, eyes glinting as you pouted and reached for them half-heartedly, content to just lean against his body instead as he joked, “Hey. We’re married. You have to be nice to me now.”
Warm breath hit his jaw as you huffed, “Well, if I knew that was the rule, I never would have said I do a few hours ago.”
A kiss was pressed to his neck despite your words, right against his two freckles, then a smile ghosted against his skin when you heard the low rumble in his chest.
Steve’s lips brushed your ear as he bent down, speaking softly, lowly, and sending the warmth between your stomach directly between your legs.
“Don’t start something you can’t handle, honey.”
Your head lifted, stares at one another challenging and hopelessly and sickeningly in love to anyone who was watching.
“Oh,” you laughed, quietly, leaned in to whisper against his lips, “I think I can handle you just fine, Mr. Harrington.”
He had you in the bathroom not even a minute later, one hand locking the door behind him and the other pressing over your mouth as you giggled.
Steve’s mouth was all over your neck as his hands found your hips, guiding you to the counter.
“You’re so beautiful,” words warm and sticky and sweet against your skin as your head fell back against his shoulder in a gasp when his lips found a new spot behind your ear. “Can’t believe I’m married to you. Can’t believe you said yes. Can’t believe you’re all-“
His hand smacked at your ass as he grabbed a fistful of it, scrunching up the fabric of your dress you could care less about now as he growled in your ear the word, “Mine.”
“Steve,” you hated how breathless you sounded, hated how he’d barely touched or kissed you and you were wrecked already, “Hurry.”
He whined into the crook of your neck, spun you and let his nose trace along the straps of your dress, across the lace covering your chest as his mouth followed, leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake.
Steve knelt, regretfully removing his lips from your skin so he could carefully lift your dress, handing it to you with a quiet, “Hold this, honey.”
He pressed a kiss to your check as you did what you were told, but then he got a proper look at you and your lip was captured between your teeth at his groan, from the way his hands ran through his hair.
“Fuck,” he sighed, as his finger trailed up your thigh and found custom, cream colored straps and shiny buckles and pretty lace you’d ordered just for him. “Look at you.”
“You like it?” The question answered by Steve’s own lip bitten raw, his fingers still roaming higher, up the sides of your cunt, already soaked.
“Baby,” Steve laughed, eyes cast down between your bodies, watching carefully as his fingers slipped beneath the wet lace. “Do I like it? I love it.”
“That’s,” your head fell back, exposing your neck his mouth was grateful for. Distracted by the way he dragged his fingers through you, swirled around your clit, the same way his tongue was against your throat. “Go-good.”
Steve pressed against your clit harder, humming against your skin where his mouth was still latched to when your body shook underneath him. Your thighs clamped around his hand, yours clutched at his shoulders with fistfuls of your dress still between your fingers.
He removed his fingers from you, quick to make work of his buckle and pants, aligning himself with you but hesitating just as his tip brushed against your entrance.
Steve looked up at you, under his lashes that cast shadows against pink cheeks dotted with freckles. He gazed at you with the kind of look that you imagined you gave a sunset. Admiring, awed, like you were taking in its beauty the first time every time. Like you knew your time with it might be fleeting, so you had to watch it every second so you didn't miss a single second of it.
He leaned in and let his lips brush over yours tenderly, deciding to take his time and forget the frantic pace you both had started with.
He murmured into your lips as they parted in a sigh beneath his kiss.
“I love you. So much. I think I’ve loved you since I saw you in that bar, I texted Robin about soul mates before I talked to you, I-“
You caught his top lip between yours, an over too quick kiss, but then you were speaking into the corner of his mouth, against his jaw.
“I love you too.”
Steve’s forehead knocked yours, your hips wiggled, making his dick twitch as you stared into each other’s eyes.
“Ready, Mrs. Harrington?”
The tip of your nose brushed his as your laugh bubbled out of you, voice all sarcastic and fond, “Ready? I’ve been ready, Steve. You’re the one taking his tim-ohmygod.”
Steve’s smug smirk twitched in front of you as he thrust into you while fake grumbling, “Me? How about you miss I’m gonna wait over a year to say I love-fuckyoufeelsogood…”
He rolled his hips, only getting deeper, and your thighs tightened on the outside of his, head thrown back against the mirror from the feeling of him inside you, which he followed. His lips skated over your cheek, your jaw, as he slowly pulled out of you and thrust back in.
Your mouth fell open with each drag against your walls that cling to him, that want him to stay there. A noise catches in the back of your throat every time he pushes into you, each time only harder and deeper as he babbled.
“Sorry, I wanted,” he grunted, mouth finding yours only to kiss you once and keep talking, “The first time I have sex with my wife to last, to linger, to-“
Your mouth captured his in a kiss this time, tugging on his bottom lip and gasping into his open mouth when he thrust faster, shallower, your name a begged breath between the two of you.
“Sorry, I didn’t want to wait anymore,” you whimpered, your dress left your fingers so you could grip the back of his head, card your fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck and tug, “To finally have sex with my husband.”
Steve moaned at the word husband, twitching inside of you, which made you grin at the way his hips stuttered, at the way his bottom lip pulled between his teeth.
“Yeah?” You gripped at the back of his head a little harder, knowing what each other liked now. He frantically pushed under the fallen dress to find your clit again with ease, trying to get the upper hand once more as you asked, “You like me calling you my husband, Steve?”
Your mouth brushed the apple of his cheek, it kissed his temple as he fell forward, thrusting faster and making quick figure eights against your nerves, gasping at your teasing.
“Wanna tell everyone I’m your wife? Tell ‘em I’m a Harrington?” Your stomach clenched at the thought too, at the pace which Steve slammed into you even harder, hips meeting in a filthy grind as your head knocked against the mirror. The thumps mingling with the sound of how you were coating him, all a little louder in the bathroom and only making you both a little more turned on.
His forehead pressed to yours as he nodded, lips of parted mouths catching every time he thrust. He moaned, he begged, “Yeah, yeah. Wanna tell them. Wanna…want…pregnant. Mine.”
Your back arched, hand searching until it found his, lacing your fingers together. His others grew sloppy against your clit, slipping over it as you nodded. Chest aching from his admission, from the way you sort of wanted it too, how it didn’t scare you as much anymore, not when it was him.
“Yeah?”
“Ye-yeah, fuck, honey, I can’t-“ Steve kissed you. Passionate and breath stealing as he held your lips to his like he’d wanted to all day. Your clasped hands hit the counter, the click of your rings together made you whine into his lips when they parted. You let him go, his name loud in the bathroom, echoing against tile and sure to be heard even on the moon as his hips stuttered when you clenched around him. Your stomach burned and your eyes blinked rapidly, sure you weren’t on the planet anymore from the amount of stars you could see as his warmth spilled into you.
It takes a second for you both to come back down to earth, for Steve to laugh, for you to press your hands to your cheeks as you looked down at the mess you’d made of yourselves.
Steve kissed at sweat kissed skin, tenderly cleaning you up as you joked with each other, sleepy eyelids and content smiles. Slow kisses that left you both sighing in between lingering touches that weren’t out of necessity, but just because you wanted to be touching.
Completely in love.
He helped you off of the counter and winced at the way your dress fell down all crinkled and obviously mussed. You shrugged before running a hand though his hair, messing it up even more than you already had, then you untied his tie and let it hang from around his neck saying something about it only being fair.
He grabbed your hand, fingers curled into yours as he kissed your knuckles and led you out of the bathroom.
Robin was the first to slow clap.
Your nose pressed to his shoulder, a groaned god dammit on your lips against his suit jacket.
Then Rocketman was blasted on the speakers, a loud “Annnnnnnd Buckley owes me one hundred dollars!” comes from Eddie at the bar, earning a smack to his chest from his girlfriend, which was nice, until she said “I get fifty of that and you know it.”
And it’s all fine, Steve doesn’t really care, because most of the guests are gone and you’re laughing and heading over to grab pie, flicking Eddie’s ear as you went.
Robin slid up next to Steve, shaking her head. “Wow. I really had faith in you Harrington. A bathroom? On your wedding night? I know you two are animals, but you couldn’t wait to have your wife in, oh, I don’t know, a private bedroom?”
Steve only smiled at the way Nancy handed you a water as you caught peach filling from your lip, while you played with the little ‘S’ dangling between your collarbones with your left hand, the large blue sapphire stone sparkling next to glittering diamonds in the light.
His wife.
For those of you who don't know, Leather and Lace was an Eddie series I started when I first started writing for the fandom. I only posted two chapters, and I just fell out of writing it. It was something I was holding close to me, and I wanted to really tell it right. I've been poking at it a lot lately, and the story has changed so much, and I'd love to share it again soon. But for now, have a little blurb from it tomorrow, and I'd really love to hear what you think. This Eddie is a childhood best friend, an enemy, a stranger, and hopefully, one day, a lover. Okay, anyways, happy voting!
*voting will close at 10am CST tomorrow, 10/3
#superbly subpar's writing#trick or treat freaks 💛#steve harrington#modern!steve harrington#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x you#steve harrington x y/n#steve harrington smut#steve harrington fic#a we'll call it love blurb#we'll call it love
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Finally got around to doing this, here are some rough sketches of my idea of how Lester looks each book! Some books are more different than others, like I don't think much changed between books 1 and 2, but I had fun doing this! Look under the cut for some notes about things I added for each design.
Book 1: Not much changes from how he's described in the books. All of the clothes he borrowed from Percy are a bit too big for him, but the flannel he borrowed from Will fits pretty well, only being slightly too long (I think Will has like, an inch over Lester)
Book 2: Basically the same as book 1 Lester. He keeps the flannel Will gave him, but it gets pretty beat up over the course of this book so he has to switch it out before book 3 :(. Hair is just a lil bit longer, and he gets clothes that fit a bit better. Headcanon time bc if Rick won't give me substantial Thalia and Apollo interaction I'll make it myself: Thalia gives Lester archer's gloves at the end of TDP, which he wears for the rest of the series. He didn't even think to wear gloves bc as a god he wouldn't need them, but Thalia noticed his beat up to shit hands at the Waystation and went "bestie... bestie no...." and gave him a pair.
Book 3: Will's flannel has been swapped for a big coat and Lester get his iconic pink camo pants. His hair is long enough to start getting weighed down a bit, and also way messier bc he's been in the labyrinth for like a month. The beat up sneakers he was wearing in books 1 & 2 get replaced with much more reasonable boots. Eyebrow scar shows up, a reminder from one of the many concussions this poor man has suffered. Also another HC time! Georgie gives Lester a little handkerchief that he wears for the rest of the series (I was gonna use Paolo's handkerchief, but Lester canonically gives that back so boo)
Book 4: The Lester looks like shit book /j. His hair is now long enough that he should really be doing something with it but he is not. He has a zip up hoodie now to cover up all his fun purple veins. Just more beat up in general honestly. Also I hc that Apollo actually lost some weight here (both bc he wasn't really eating well before getting to New Rome bc of stress/grief, and bc he got really sick and continued to not eat well while that was happening) But it obviously doesn't do anything to help his self-esteem or mood in this book. Kind've a visual way of being like "the superificial flaws Apollo clung to in the first book weren't the real issue, he was just hyperfixating on them to distract himself from what he was really upset about, so when the superficial issues get solved he doesn't even notice bc he's grown enough as a character to cut the bullshit and focus on what's really bothering him." or idk something like that. I like to contrast this with a hc I've mentioned before about the time between books 4 and 5, which is that the physical flaws Apollo whined about in book 1 (i.e. the acne and his weight) get "worse" throughout the road trip from California to New York, but Apollo truly just does not care that much about that shit anymore and that's why it doesn't come up in the narration.
Book 5: Final Lester! It's been over a month since the last book so I'm taking liberties and saying Lester's hair is long enough to pull up now bc I want him to be able to do that goddammit. Final outfit is borrowed from Percy again, so that's why it's so big. He also has a pendant that Lavinia gave to him bc they're besties. Also I forgot to mention it, but his shoulders are slightly broader here (and have been getting broader throughout the series) bc he's been working those muscles so much with the constant archery.
Also I didn't draw his quiver bc honestly I forgor, but I like to imagine he's been getting little pins and bobs from a lot of his friends that he's been sticking on his quiver strap. A few examples that come to mind are:
Kayla: A classic hot topic pin with a sun with sunglasses on it.
Leo: A pin made of scrap metal with the alchemical symbol for fire carved in.
Agave: Pinned a clover to Apollo's quiver for good luck. It didn't stay on there long, but it was the thought that counted.
Hazel: A piece of citrine decorated with metal cords.
Lavinia: Another classic hot topic pin, this one is heart shaped and has a picture of Hatsune Miku on it.
Jason: One of the monopoly houses he'd been using to mark the positions for the temples. A lot of the little houses had fallen off the diorama during the car crash at the beginning of TTT. The night after, Apollo asked Reyna if he could make sure the diorama was fixed. Reyna agreed, and he put it back together based on what he remembered. He spent an hour or so gluing on houses and hotels for Mars, Somnus, Fons, Salus, and on and on, until he got to the last one. A red hotel meant to show where the temple of Apollo would go. Apollo poked a little hole in it, and fastened it to his quiver with a bobby pin. It's nestled close to where the strap meets the quiver itself, so it's less likely to fly off.
Meg: Pinned a rose petal to his quiver right before he went to fight Python. It lasted for even less time than Agave's clover did, but again, it was the thought that counted.
#sunny speaks#long post#trials of apollo#toa apollo#lester papadopoulos#apollart#fun fact: all of the colors I used for these were color picked from the covers of the books they came from!#oh and i forgot to mention he also get more freckles as the series goes on bc he spends so much time outside
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Goodbye, for now
BABY? HONEY? BOYFRIEND SHOT? Jikook you're too much!
This episode was truly the best way to end the show, maybe even the best episode of the series. (Neck in neck with episode 2 of course) The way they enjoyed it so much but were also so sad it was over. The hot tension all around, the soft boyfriends mood who can't stop flirting and name calling each other with the most low-key couple-like sweet names. They could not stop laughing, they could not stop touching and they couldn't stop being hilarious without even trying.
~
SK Spotify daily chart end of November 2023 :
Jimin Jungkook Jimin Jungkook Jimin Jimin
~
It would be such a full circle moment if Jimin posted the boyfriend photo (which won't happen). Would almost be like a soft launch of some sort.
Not the underwear too?? Gosh I love my little gay freaks!! (didn't understand why Jimin would quote their 'yet another inner joke meme' right at that moment but I've learned to not question their inner workings)
~
Sorry but i have to be pretty one last time and say that I kinda had enough of seeing so much from the crew around or even in Jikook's shots and angles. It breaks the fourth wall a little too much and ruins the whole bubble idea. Ok I'm done lol
~
Returning to the issue at hand, the "seeing the beds for the first time" scene keeps getting funnier and funnier. As if they don't already have designated sides of the bed 😏
~
Ah the never ending bickering gives me life. Peep the half korean half english talk when they playfully get on each others nerves 👀😂
I better not speak on the scuzzi jacuzzi shenanigans cause otherwise.. Let's just say the photo speaks for itself..
NO YOU KNOW WHAT IMMA SPEAK. We all know that jacuzzi time is always intimate, relaxing and personal for people that's why I wish Jikook had enjoyed it fully without cameras. Yes I'm pissed on their behalf, that they had to film the whole thing with 382929 different angles. lol
His face is literally saying "oh so you're really gonna make me do it huh? if I was in your place I would've folded immediately and would've never let you go through with it!!" 😂
~
No one ever:
Jikook every 2sec : HONEY OH HONEY
(I was actually listening to the song while writing this and idk why it's so funny to me even tho it's a sad love ballad)
~
They must've loved getting the chance to at least see one episode of the show, plus the idea of watching it together..
Jungkook being so entertained by it meanwhile Jimin being mortified about half of the things that happened. HILARIOUS
HAHAHHAHAHA all parties were concerned if they'd be able to pull it off, I can't
BEST BELIEVE they're always gonna find a way to touch. Consciously or unconsciously.
~
This show made me realize that my favourite thing ever is Jk making food for Jimin, then making him hysterically laugh and therefore getting to hear Jimin's adorable giggles.
~
"Hello it is I the one and only, the only one who can touch Jimin's head ble ble ble ble" - JK
Jk was like: How can you imagine Jimin without me in your dream? Are you crazy? What is this delusional dream world you live in Jin hyung??
~
Tbh it's so meaningful and a huge thing saying that these trips were literally the best trips of your life. I think the statement almost went over people's heads.
I can't get enough of Jimin looking pretty and cuddly and Jungkook's immediate thought being: I HAVE TO FILM YOU
Them saying they can do a reboot when they come back gave me some hope that maybe just maybe this is not the end of AYS 😭
The ending bonus clip left me fulfilled but also sad and with goosebumps all over.
Thank you Jimin & Jungkook for letting us peek into this trip and getting to witness some of your precious moments.
Signing off, J&J 🥹
Ps. So I'm guessing the 52 minute video that comes with the photobook is probably the 3 bts videos combined that they've been reviewing for 48392 months right?
#I really enjoyed this review series#jikook#kookmin#jimin#jungkook#bts#bangtan#are you sure?!#jikook travel show#ep. 8#september 2024#final episode😭
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How We Used To Be (Forced Closeness)
Oh Hai - Logan has inspired me again. This was supposed to be a very different story and there was supposed to be smut, but it didn't work out that way.
Warnings: Talk of injuries (basically that scene in Logan (2017)), Not smut, almost tho, talk about the past, angst I guess? Old Man Logan, who has issues with intimacy and it's not what you think (or maybe it is). I used y/n but it's in first person and I gave her powers/a mutant name, so idk what that's called.
Old Man Logan x mutant!reader I guess? I'm too old to learn the new tricks of labeling these things, all I know is I've been thirsty for Logan since I was literally 7 years old and this is quickly turning into one of the recipe blogs where you have to read a bazillion words before you see the directions. Sorry
Word Count: 3.2k (don't look at me)
[Masterlist]
[Logan Masterlist]
“You look like shit, love,” I said, leaning in the doorway to the bathroom. Logan’s eyes shot up to glare at me in the mirror. He was bleeding from several bullet wounds and was currently shirtless and heaving over the sink.
“Get the fuck out,” He ground out. I hadn’t seen him in almost six months. Almost a record.
“Calaban called me,” I told him, knowing he likely knew that was how I ended up here. “I’m glad he did, you’re worse off than anticipated.”
“If you touch me, I’ll rip your arms off,” A caged animal snapping his teeth. I knew all of his threats to me were empty, but it still made my heart ache that he would rather suffer than let me help him.
“I’m not scared of you,” I told him, pulling myself off the doorframe. I shut the door behind me and crossed the tiles until I stood next to him. He was snarling in general, but didn’t move away when I took a cloth and began to clean the blood from one of the wounds on his arm.
My gift had earned me the name Booster back when things were good and goofy mutant names were all the rage, as my main ability was that I literally boosted other mutants powers when I touched them. I always joked about how it was a lazy XMen name. But now? There weren’t many of us left, no reason for silly code names. But we still stuck together when we could. I told myself that was the only reason I hung around this part of the country still. To be close to the few mutants I knew were left.
Nevermind that it was really the bleeding man in front of me that I stayed for.
“I don’t need your help,” Logan’s voice was quieter now, but still sharp edged like his teeth. I shushed him and wiped at another spot of blood, waiting for him to give in to the knowledge that I could actually make him feel better.
“I’m sure you don’t, but it would make me feel useful to help, would you deny me that?” I quirked an eyebrow at him and he looked away from me.
“Last time you helped me I hurt you, I’m not letting that happen again,” I reached up and took his face in my hands. His eyes fluttered closed.
“Cuts heal,” I told him. He moved to cage me with his arms for a moment and I was sure he was going to give in. But all at once he shoved me away from him and I stumbled into the wall. “Logan,” I chided.
“Leave, Y/N,” There was no snarl left in his voice, just defeat.
And pain.
“No,” I told him simply. “Now are you going to let me Boost you or not?”
“Last time…”
“Yeah, yeah, last time,” I rolled my eyes as I cut him off. My abilities didn’t just boost one part of a mutant, it boosted all of them. So in Logan’s case, it made him a bit more animalistic for a time. Made him more likely to use his teeth, or use his claws.
The claws are what got me that last time he kept thinking about. He got me good, I'd give him that, I even had the scars on my ribcage if you looked close enough. But I didn't tell him that.
“If you do that again, I won’t be able to stop myself from…” Logan snarled at himself as a wave of pain contorted his features. “Fuck,” He cursed lowly to himself. I sighed and pulled my shirt off while he watched me in the mirror.
“I’m a big girl, love, I can handle you,” I half teased, half soothed him. “And don’t forget, I get to keep a bit of what I boost, so anything you do to me won’t last long,” A secondary benefit to skin to skin contact with me. I got to taste the powers that others had. I hadn’t used it on too many mutants in my life. Most mutants didn’t really have powers that benefited from boosting all that much. But Logan and his healing factor? It was useful. Even if it made him extra feisty for a day or so.
It also made him horny usually but that was hardly a complaint from me.
“Fine, but only for a minute,” He finally gave in. I smiled at him and stepped behind him.
“Want me to take my bra off too?” I smirked over his shoulder at him and he shivered, shaking his head no. Too bad I was a bad listener. I shucked my bra and made a big show of dropping it to the floor next to us. Logan let out a shaky breath, knowing what was coming.
We’d been here before.
I pulled his beater out of his pants and slid my hands slowly up his ribs. He grunted as my hands slid over bruises and broken things. I hummed softly as I let my powers unfurl into his skin while I slid his shirt up. I’d learned pretty early on that the more skin that touched skin, the better my boosting worked.
I pressed myself along Logan’s back as I helped ease his shirt over his shoulders and arms. He groaned when the shirt finally came free over his head and joined mine on the floor.
My arms closed around him, one moving up towards his chest, one circling around his middle. Skin searching skin as he caught my eyes in the mirror.
“How does it feel?” I whispered against his shoulder. I had aimed for his neck but he avoided me.
“Warm,” He murmured. “Always does,” I pressed a soft kiss to his skin and he shivered again.
Instead of teasing him anymore, I focused on the task at hand, closing my eyes and leaning against him. I could feel my powers seeping into his skin, like sunshine that time we took a bunch of the kids to the beach the summer it was so hot the AC kept going out. I wondered if he ever let himself remember the good times or if he only ever lingered on the bad ones.
Logan let out a shaky breath followed by a deep groan as a bullet pushed free of his flesh. It landed with a metallic thud in the sink, closely followed by a second and a third.
“Do you know how many there are?” I asked.
“More,” Was all Logan got out from between his clenched teeth. I adjusted my hold and focused back on my breathing. Healing and boosting were both somehow tied to breath.
My powers were not a magic fix though either. It still took time. I still remembered the days when he didn’t need me to boost him, but he’d ask just so I’d touch him a little. Back then I’d been shy, always holding his hand, or maybe his arm. I was shy a lot until the day he kissed me the first time.
Then all the cards were on the table…all the clothes on the floor.
A metallic thud on the floor brought me back to the task at hand. I moved my arms to touch different skin and Logan covered my hands with his, holding me so I didn’t pull away. I smiled against his shoulder and playfully nipped him with my teeth.
“And you didn’t want me to touch you a second ago,” I teased him. He growled, low in his throat. The animal was coming up in his chest and I knew what that meant for me. Logan was scared he’d hurt me again, but I knew the risk, and I was eager to face him.
“That’s enough,” Logan panted, but he didn’t pull my hands away. I waited to see what he’d do, pull away or pull me closer.
He brought one of my hands up to his mouth and kissed each finger tip. I hummed in pleasure, not so subtly rubbing my suddenly erect nipples along his spine. Another growl and my fingers were suddenly in his mouth.
“Logan!” I chuckled as he nibbled on my fingers. “I know that’s technically skin, but my arm isn’t helping if you hold it up like that,” I tried to pull my hand back and he just grumbled at me.
“How do you still taste so good?” Logan mused, not expecting an answer. “It’s been years and you still taste just as sweet,”
“You’re a romantic is why,” I hid my blush from his hungry eyes by dipping behind his shoulder again. Logan pulled me in front of him, caging me between his chest, his arms, and the bathroom sink.
“You should leave now, before it’s too late,” His eyes were hungry in the same way they had always been for me. I reached up and took his face in my hands again, tracing the crows feet around his eyes with my thumbs.
“And miss all the fun?” I mused. He rolled his eyes at me. “And you’re still bleeding,” I pointed out, tracing the one wound on his arm that hadn’t quite healed yet. It must have been the nastiest one because it appeared to be the last one to go.
“Y/N,” he warned.
“I’ll stop touching you when this one heals,” I told him. “Promise,” it was a baldfaced lie. I wouldn’t leave him unless he bodily threw me out the window. And not only would I not fit out the closest window, he would never dare.
“I don’t know if I can hold out that long,” Logan’s pupils were blown and his smirk was hazy. I knew exactly what he was craving and I was pretty impressed he’d managed to hold himself back as long as he had.
“I can take you, big boy,” I smirked. “Always could and always will,” I pulled myself on his shoulders so that I could press my lips to his. It was just a quick peck, testing the waters. Logan stared at me for a long time, neither of us noticing that the last bullet hole had finally closed.
But there was still pain in him, still things to heal, so I held onto him, hoping to fix everything I could before he made me leave him again.
Logan finally got himself together enough to push me away from him. I swallowed hard, wondering if he’d be mad that I clung to him as long as I had, wondering if this time I’d sassed my way into making him actually hate me.
His eyes drifted from my flushed cheeks, to my parted lips, down the curve of my neck and the valley between my breasts. I knew they’d seen better days, having drooped with the years, but from the hunger in Logan’s eyes, you’d think he didn’t notice.
His hands moved from my shoulders to my chest and I gasped at the sudden sensation of him pawing me.
“I shouldn’t,” Logan complained into my throat as he dragged his teeth along my pulse.
“I can take it,” I assured him.
“What if I hurt you?”
“I can take it,” I told him again.
“Fuck,” Logan’s growl tickled my neck as he moved to lift me onto the nearest surface, a sad excuse for a bathroom cabinet that gave way with a crack as soon as he set me on it.
“I’ll fix that,” I told him but he didn’t care, his mouth was on mine before I could come out with another apology. Logan pulled me flush with his chest, off the now broken surface to my feet, and walked backwards with me until he ran into the door frame.
I giggled a little as he cursed, unclear why this was so difficult. I got us through the door, smiling and pulling on his hands, making sure to keep my skin touching his somewhere. Anywhere.
Everywhere I could reach.
Logan licked his way into my mouth as we stumbled through the living room, bouncing off the wayward furniture as we made our way to his bed. Finally, something soft to land on.
I was on my back looking up at him. I’d seen him in his prime, when his hair wasn’t graying, when he didn’t keep a beard. I’d seen him when nothing could stop him. And looking at him now, I felt exactly the same as I did back then. Hungry for the animal of him, for the things I knew he could do to me. Lust for the sensations he could cause. And love, still burning brightly after all these years.
Love for the man he was underneath it all.
When Logan didn’t join me right away, I reached up to him and whined, knowing he always liked how desperate I got for him. He shook his head at my shenanigans and I wiggled for him as his hands worked to undo his pants.
“Impatient as always,” Logan chuckled.
“It’s your fault for making me go away all the time,” I countered. His slacks hit the floor and he moved to kiss his way up my bare stomach as he worked on getting me out of mine.
He just grunted as his mouth ran along the skin he exposed when he pulled my pants and underwear down my thighs. I knew it wasn’t the time to bring it up, so I didn’t push him or ask him to ask me to stay.
Logan pressed his face into the soft spot behind my knee and I squirmed as his beard tickled the sensitive skin.
“God you smell amazing,” He mumbled, tracing the inside of my thigh with open mouth kisses. I let my hips relax and fall open for him and his eyes zeroed in on the place that, at the moment, needed him most. With a growl, Logan moved to bury his face in my folds, and I couldn’t help the surprised yelp I let out at his movements.
There was a time he would devour me for hours if given the chance. A time when he’d want me in any place we were. Broom closets, empty classrooms, offices that we weren’t even supposed to be in. Every hotel and far too many bathrooms. Quickies and love making and slow fucks and even hate fucks now and then. We had everything, but now?
“Fuck, Logan that tickles,” I wiggled against his face as he breathed me in.
“Shh,” He murmured. “Just let me have this,”
“I’m trying to give it to you,” I groaned. Logan rolled his eyes at me, but adjusted so that he could pass a long lick of his tongue through me. I shivered at the sensation, a fire sparking along my nerves. I felt his self-satisfied smirk against my core before he moved his mouth against me again.
“I don’t remember you being this desperate,” He mused, pulling two long fingers through the dampness he’s been lapping at.
“Logan, baby, please,” I begged him to do more than tease me.
“Please what, sweetheart?” Logan’s eyes caught mine as I huffed, annoyed that he wasn’t fucking me yet.
“I want more of you,” I told him.
“Yeah well, ‘more of me’ ain’t exactly working at the moment,” He admitted. I knew finally growing old had caught up with him in a lot of ways, but my chest ached for him that it came for him this way too. He’d always prided himself on his virality.
“I want any of you I can get, baby,” I smiled at him, reaching down to pull him flush with my chest so I could kiss him again, my mouth opening easily for his tongue to explore. I let my powers unfurl into the kiss, into any skin of his that was touching mine. Trying desperately to let him feel like himself again.
“Hmm,” He mumbled, pulling back slightly. I kissed the side of his mouth, his jaw, as he tried to shake the feeling out of his head. “Warm,” His eyes were suddenly really far away, sleepy. I kissed him again, softer now.
“It’s ok, baby, I’ve got you,” I told him. He made a grumbling noise in his chest as sleep zapped his strength.
“What did you…what did you do to me?” Logan tried to push himself off of me, but only managed to roll to one side. I held him close.
“Nothing, love,” I whispered, kissing his face again. “Healing is just, just a lot, remember?”
“But I was gonna fuck you,” Logan mumbled, eyes closed now.
“I know baby,” I smiled gently at him. I had my arms around him still, trying to help him heal some of the damage that the bullets hadn’t caused. “You can fuck me tomorrow,” He tried to move away from me, but he was unable to untangle our limbs before his body told him it was nap time.
I sighed heavily, a bit bummed that neither of us had ended up getting our rocks off, but happy too, that I’d been able to help boost his healing. But I had a terrible feeling in the pit of my stomach that he was far worse off than I thought he was.
When we were younger, he’d almost go into a rut after being Boosted. It was madness but it was always a good time. The last few years, with his body slowing down, the Boosting made him feral, but then he’d pass out for a long time while his body caught back up. The last time I’d been here, he’d fucked me through two orgasms and himself through one, before the sleepiness came for him. That time, he’d lashed out, thinking he’d been drugged. It was like the nights he’d wake up with nightmares, only he’d not gone fully to sleep yet.
Part of me was glad he didn’t try to gut me at least. But my heart clenched at the thought that maybe the end of him was closer than I wanted to believe.
To stave off the tears that were suddenly crowding my throat, I adjusted our bodies so that Logan could use my chest as a pillow. He mumbled something in his sleep, and his arm pulled me closer, holding me like maybe this time he wasn’t going to let me go. I circled his head with my arms, carding my fingers through his hair, happy to be able to comfort him, to allow him to sleep.
For just a moment, it could have been any other day. We could be young again. All of our friends, still alive. I closed my eyes and imagined the sounds of the school. Kids running down wooden hallways, calling after each other. Tears escaped me then, because most of those kids were gone now. And any kids like them, like I had been so long ago now, didn’t have a school to go to. They would be rounded up and killed now. Or taken away to some place horrible. And I knew there was nothing I could do.
Except maybe hold Logan just a little bit tighter, knowing that every fight ever fought for those kids, eventually made its way to him too.
[Another Logan Fic]
[Masterlist]
[Logan Masterlist]
Likes/comments/reblogs directly correlate to how much fanfiction/fanart you see ;)
#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#wolverine#wolverine x reader#logan xmen#old man logan#mutant reader#logan wolverine#james logan howlett#logan 2017#deadpool and wolverine#wolverine x you#x men wolverine#wolverine smut#logan smut#logan x reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett x female reader#james logan howlett x reader#logan howlett fanfiction#logan howlett imagine
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chapter 166 thoughts
As of chapter 166, Oshi no Ko has finished a roughly four-and-a-half year run started back in 2020. While there's some speculation about an epilogue or some extra content in volume 16 when it drops, this is where the main story ends. And you know what that means!!!
OSHI NO KO HAS OFFICIALLY ENDED WITHOUT ADDRESSING OR ACKNOWLEDGING THE FACT THAT RUBY KISSED HER BROTHER IN CHAPTER 143
please understand that this is FUCKING BOGUS
I'll probably do a longer post on this subject specifically, but my main critique of 143 when the chapter dropped was that while I liked the individual beats in it and I was really glad to see Akasaka finally addressing this tension bubbling underneath Aqua and Ruby's relationship, the immediate swerve away from showing us the aftermath of that kiss felt to me like an admission that the story was going to needlessly draw this out even more. Now that the story has ended and we can see that moment had literally no impact on the plot or even the character dynamics, I'd like to revise that statement - it feels like an admission of compromise. It feels like crumbs thrown to AquRuby fans to tempt them to keep reading and to stir up the waters of the ship wars, so people would keep reading and stay invested in the manga right to the very end. But most of all, it feels deeply disrespectful to both Aqua and Ruby as characters. Rather than exploring their feelings and giving both of them interiority and complexity in relation to incest or even just fucking acknowledging that the kiss had happened and letting their dynamic evolve, the series just memory holes the entire event and asks that you do too. Rather than letting Ruby have any development whatsoever as pertains to that relationship or, god forbid, let a female character move on romantically from the male lead, the series ends with her feelings so up in the air that I literally could not tell you what she thinks of Aqua by the time he dies.
ANYWAY… FINAL CHAPTER. BREATHES OUT VERY HARD.
I really can't believe it's taken us until the final chapter to actually deal with Ruby's grief over Aqua lol. We got a snippet of it last chapter but it was so brief that it really just felt like a tease. I also just think it's kind of bizarre that we're spending this little time on Ruby having feelings about Aqua's death to the extent that I have no idea how or when she found out about it.
It's also kind of hard to feel particularly strongly about Ruby's grief when the chapter doesn't really bother to explore it all that much. It's just a montage of Ruby quite literally Screaming, Crying and Throwing Up while Akane dispassionately narrates it all. The art also doesn't really help in terms of connecting with the emotions at play - I usually really like Mengo's expression work and the way she depicts extreme emotions but this all just felt like of… I don't know how else to put it. Goofy??? Is that an insane thing to say about Ruby grieving her brother???
Idk, something about both the panelling and just the extreme on-the-noseness of Ruby, again, literally Screaming, Crying Throwing Up while she's wearing a Burning cosplay Just In Case You, The Audience, Didn't Get It only for her to abruptly be done crying with no exploration or insight as to what's going on in her head that allows her to move forward.
Honestly, this is kind of the issue with everyone in the cast. The resolution is just sort of "Aqua died and we were sad about it but then we stopped being sad". I know what the story is trying to go for here - it's trying to express that even when you're in pain, life goes on and so you have to find a way to go on with it. But the result is that we spend all this time oogling at their pain without spending equivalent or even meaningful time on their recovery process.
It feels both excessive and undercooked at the same time and I'm left with the same icky, voyeuristic feeling I got from Aqua's funeral last chapter. This should be the point in the story at which we empathize with Ruby the most, but she remains a frustratingly distant figure right to the final pages. Part of this is an unfortunate consequence of Akane's narration directing these final chapters meaning that we're hearing about Ruby from an outsider's perspective and thus don't really see what's going on in her head… but if I can be frank, this has been an issue of Aka's with Ruby in particular basically nonstop since chapter 123.
As others & myself have noted, despite the absolutely catastrophic downward spiral Ruby is in at that point, Aqua revealing himself as Gorou basically flips it all off like a switch. There's some mild lipservice paid to the idea that Ruby is just using her dependency on Gorou to prop herself up and it's pointed out that the issues that contributed to her breakdown haven't actually been resolved - but none of these issues are ever even acknowledged again, let alone resolved. So, functionally, that reveal does fix all Ruby's problems in the space of a single chapter and the result is, again, that we spend multiple chapters gourging on depictions of Ruby's absolute rock bottom only for her to ping back to normal like a lightswitch. As such, the depictions of her pain feel less like explorations of Ruby's interiority and more like voyeuristic oogling at Ruby's misery and trauma and the effect is that the resolution to it all is both unsatisfying and a little gross. The result is that it feels like Akasaka is just indulgently mining the imagery of cute girls suffering because it causes simple thoughts neuron activation but doesn't respect these girls enough as characters to build them back up.
It doesn't help that this is basically the in-universe excuse for Ruby's career further skyrocketing. Instead of Ruby becoming a star on her own merits as the story keeps insisting she was supposed to, she's artificially buoyed by the public's morbid fascination with her tragedy. If I was feeling charitable towards the story right now, I would say this is an avenue of intentional critique but… well, I don't feel super charitable about the story right now lol
I WILL say that the one part of this chapter I did just uncomplicatedly like was the beat of Mem trying to suspend activities (presumably in the wake of her grief for Aqua) only for Kana to basically immediately explode into her room and help her get back on her feet. It's a beat that would've been much more effective if we'd, you know, seen it, but I otherwise enjoyed it and I thought it was sweet.
But. pbbbbtttt. I guess I can't talk around it any longer… let's get into the Dome concert.
To start things off on the immediately worst note possible, Akane describes Ruby performing at the Dome as being 'everyone's dream', including Aqua's. I'm reminded once again of the strange turn the story took in insisting that um, actually, performing at the Dome was totes Ai's dream all along (even though she literally didn't give a shit even a week before she was due to perform there herself) so Ruby performing there is fulfilling that dream for her!!! and I can't help but wonder if this abrupt shift in focus is an attempt to make readers forget what Ai's actual dream was - to see her beloved children grow up happy and healthy. Hell, it wasn't even really Aqua's dream, until the story suddenly had to try and convince us that his entire purpose for existence was to kill himself so Ruby could be an idol for slightly longer than she would've otherwise. The only people whose dreams she's textually fulfilling are Ichigo and Miyako and Ruby herself, but…
Honestly, is this really Ruby's dream anymore?
Who is Hoshino Ruby? What does she want? Why does she want it? These should be the very least of what we can concretely say about not only a protagonist but a character who has become a central figure of the entire story as Ruby has, but with the way Oshi no Ko has warped and distorted her, I find myself increasingly unsure of what the story wants her to be or how I should answer those questions.What does Ruby feel about Aqua? Was she still in love with him? Had she moved on, romantically? Was she still waiting for a response to her confession? Did she finally realize it was probably kind of shitty to respond to her brother going "lowkey wanna kms" by sticking her tongue down his throat? I Guess We'll Never Know.
This extends to whatever the fuck Ruby's relationship with idols and being an idol is. Almost the entirety of Ruby's time in the story has been spent reiterating over and over that Ruby cannot just be an idol who imitates Ai and that to truly shine, she needs to step out of her mom's shadow and shine in her own way. Ruby even literally tells Kana in no uncertain terms in 137 - "I'll be a star in my own way. I won't be like Mama."
While this has always been the text of the story, as I've pointed out before, the actual art with which Ruby's idolhood depicts her basically just as Ai 2.0. It relies so heavily on mining the imagery of Ai's charisma and personality as an idol and using them as the measure of Ruby's success as an idol that Ruby essentially has no visual or conceptual identity of her own as an idol. She's just Ai, But Arbitrarily Better, For Reasons The Narrative Fails To Actually Establish But Hopes That You Just Accept Anyway. This was always kind of annoying, but now that friction seems to have been resolved by… just making her Ai 2.0, But Arbitrarily Better (etc, etc) in the text as well. The fact that we're given no further insight as to Ruby's feelings and continue to just have Akane Explain Ruby's Character Arc to the camera also doesn't help.
All this combines to make the Dome concert and the final few pages feel exceptionally cold in a way I really don't think was intended by Akasaka. Yes, that splash page was nice and flashy but… I just felt nothing. I have no idea if or why Ruby cares about this. And even though the Dome concert has been hyped up through the entire story as the peak of Ruby's achievements as an idol, I feel no sense of accomplishment in her finally being there - not just because her journey to it was basically sneezed at us across two panels, but because it just feels hollow as a victory lap for Ruby. Again, she feels so distant and abstracted as a character that I can't bring myself to feel very strongly about her good or bad.
I think the perfect encapsulation of this are the final four pages of the story. Ruby's words here are very clearly intended to be a callback to Ai's words to Gorou in chapter one but as @all-of-her-light pointed out in our initial discussions of the chapter, Ruby very much does not have an equivalent to Ai's conclusion that she nevertheless wants and values the opportunity to find personal happiness and fulfillment outside of being an idol. Are we supposed to believe that simply being an idol is all that Ruby needs to achieve a similar degree of happiness and fulfillment? Is there no more to her than that?
I've seen a lot of people interpret this ending as exceptionally bleak and, as usual, gleefully predicting Ruby's immanent suicide because her beloved oniichansensei isn't around but this is indulging in, if you'll allow me to be frank, some pretty transparently ship-motivated flanderization. Despite what certain sections of the fandom would like to believe, Aqua and Ruby's lives, past and current, have never revolved around each other to the exclusion of every other relationship in their life. Ruby has a massive support network of people who love and care for her and actively want her to get back on her feet. I can one hundred percent believe that she does not need Aqua in her life to be happy and content.
The issue is that we don't see enough of Ruby to understand that ourselves. Again, she has become such a distant figure with so little insight into what she's thinking and why that this ending is basically a Rorschach test in which you can interpret basically whatever the hell you want or assume because we have so little canon basis to support or debunk our assumptions.
and yes. don't think i didn't see them. it IS both grimly hilarious and weirdly tonally appropriate for this ending that ruby has a bunch of oshi goods of ai and aqua including their fucking autographs set up to say goodbye to every day.
AND…… WE'RE DONE!!! THAT'S OSHI NO KO, BABY!!!! well, technically, there's going to be a 20 page extra chapter in volume 16 but I don't see it being big or substantive enough to meaningfully change my feelings about the ending so… I guess we're leaving it here. Damn. Feels crazy to be done with it.
I'll probably do a bigger post down the line about my thoughts on the ending as a whole but in terms of just How This Chapter Made Me feel, I guess the word is just… meh! It's definitely not an ending I like and I think the execution is sloppy and rushed but I also just don't really have the energy to feel angry about it. Maybe that's sad in its own way but tbh… I still really love Oshi no Ko! I still find it engaging and I find the characters I enjoy rewarding to talk about. I like the artistry of the anime adaptation. I don't blame anybody else for being so turned off by this ending that they're done with the series but for me, I like what I like about OnK too much that this ending could retroactively ruin it for me. Whatever else happens with the OnK franchise, whatever directions the anime and live-action take, this will always be the series that gave me Ai and the Hoshino family and. look at me. look at what she's done to my brain. could I really ask for anything more than that?
That being said, I'm definitely not done with discussing the series! I have fics to write (including a VERY exciting large scale project lined up with some friends), my Ai analysis post to finish and I also want to do a re-read of the series and finish my anime rewatch. I'll be here to discuss Oshi no Ko as long as I have things to say about it and as long as you guys will have me! Despite how the series ended, I've had a genuinely wonderful experience in the fandom and I really don't want to let go of the little community we've built together just because the series is done. I'm Ai's fan for all eternity!!!
#oshi no ko#oshi no posting#onk spoilers#chapter reviews#IT ALL... RETURNS..... TO NOTHING....#IT ALL COMES#TUMBLING DOWN TUMBLING DOWN#TUMBLING DOOOOOWN
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(a very late valentine's day special) how twst characters would fall in love with you!
okay, so when i created this blog last year, i didn't have much time to write something for valentine's day, but i thought that i should try and write something for it this year!
at first i wanted to write something like "how twst characters would confess their love for you", i wanted it to be a reference to the "how twst characters would react to your love confession" series i made back when i just created this blog and i still only have the heartslabyul, savanaclaw and octavinelle hcs. i am sorry. but to be honest, i didn't have a lot of ideas and it was hard to find inspiration, so i decided to go with something different. but who knows, maybe i'll actually write it one day! also i know that this idea is very basic and i'm sorry.
this post has all nrc students (except ortho) + rsa and nbc characters, so GET READY BECAUSE THIS IS GONNA BE A VERY LONG POST.
also i'm having some really bad internet problems rn and even though i can use mobile data, EDITING ON MY PHONE IS A PAIN. I CAN'T DO ANYTHING. and idk when wifi will start working again and i'll be able to use my computer again, so sorry if this post looks weird, has typos and stuff like that, I JUST WANT TO POST IT ALREADY. I'M SICK OF SEEING IT IN MY DRAFTS.
heartslabyul.
riddle rosehearts.
♡ he doesn't understand you at all. you should be afraid of him, you should actually hate him for what he did and how he acted earlier. he was the first to overblot in front of you, he's sure it was quite a traumatic memory from you. and it's not like he treated you better than he treated other nrc students, he was just as willing to punish you for any "misbehavior". so why.. why do you still want you and riddle to become closer? you simply don't think that riddle actually had bad intentions, he just genuinely thought that everything will be okay if he just follows the rules and makes others follow them. so.. you don't think he's a bad person or anything like that. just someone who has a lot of issues and doesn't know how to deal with them properly. and after you say that.. riddle starts feeling very strange.
♡ falling in love with you feels so sudden, riddle doesn't remember being this interested in you when he first met you. he has to admit that he even kind of.. looked down on you back then and didn't think you were that special. though the case of you being the only magicless student here really was special. he also was angry at you because of you being so close with ace and deuce.. but now, he feels different. as he learns more about you and starts getting used to your company, he realizes that he actually likes you a lot. he even admires you, because it must be hard to deal with so much stuff as someone who's magicless he's sorry for being the first to overblot btw. he's always here if you need any help.
♡ why did he fall in love with you? well, you're certainly a very smart, strong and kind person, but the main reason was.. he was just happy to be understood by someone. he didn't expect you out of all people to forgive him, but it sure was a nice surprise. you're always here to calm him down when he's close to using his unique magic or yelling at someone for breaking the rules again, however, you don't blame him for acting like that and you say that his feelings are valid, he just has to find a better way to express them and process them. so.. it probably just feels nice to be seen as someone other than a rose-red tyrant.
ace trappola.
♡ as someone who said some pretty bad things about you and grim when you first met.. wow, it feels embarrassing to admit that he has a crush on you now. imagine making fun of a magicless human and then falling in love with them. yeah, that's ace. so, how did it happen? he's not sure when exactly he got feelings for you, it just.. happened. you two became so close, he actually couldn't imagine spending a day without you. everything just feels so boring when you're not around. pranking you or showing off to you or just talking to you makes his day, even if it's just you going "ACE D:<", he loves seeing your reactions.. and maybe, he loves you.
♡ it's hard to notice him acting any different when he's in love with you, but if you pay closer attention, you can see him blushing after you praise him for something or you can notice him asking you to hang out with him more often. he also sometimes freezes for a moment when you call him your friend, it's almost like he's asking you ".. but are you sure you don't wanna be more than friends?". but right after that, he goes back to his usual behavior and he's surprisingly good at hiding his crush on you.
♡ falling in love with you feels fun and kinda sad at the same time, because even though ace tries so hard to act confident and he claims that you love him just as much, he's actually not sure if you love him back or not. he doesn't mind being seen only as a friend, being friends with you is cool, but also.. yeah, he wants more. and he's not sure if he's ready for a serious relationship, considering what he did in the past to that girl he used to date. he knows that he would never do that to you, because you're so much cooler than that girl and you're much more interesting, but he also doesn't want to let you down. but if you do love him back.. he will try his best to treat you right, though it doesn't mean that you will be safe from his teasing and his pranks.
deuce spade.
♡ out of all the heartslabyul boys, i imagine deuce being the one to get a crush on you earlier than all the others. you're just so nice and sweet and understanding.. you also didn't judge him after you heard about his past and even said that you're proud of him for trying to change and become a better person. after that, deuce couldn't get your words out of his head and became extremely loyal to you, he's always here if you need any help and he feels so happy when you praise him or want to spend time with him.
♡ it's very easy to notice him having a crush on you, honestly. he tries really hard to hide it, but he fails and ace laughs at him every time. he can't say anything properly when you compliment him or smile at him and he starts stuttering, giggling like an idiot or he simply runs away and ends up tripping and falling. it makes him even more cute though and you can give him more attention to get more reactions like that from him or you can pretend not to notice on purpose.
♡ falling in love with you feels like something completely new and that's understandable, deuce has never experienced a feeling like this before. and even though at first it was just a very huge crush, now it actually feels like something more deep, it's like.. he really is in love with you. spending the rest of his life with you sounds scary and he's not sure if he's ready for something like this, but when he imagines it, it makes him feel soft and even kind of excited. he will understand if you reject his feelings, he has not the best past, but if you say yes to him, he will try to become the perfect boyfriend for you. he already knew that he wants to become a better person for his mom, but now he has two people in his life that he wants to change for.
cater diamond.
♡ when cater first met you, he thought you were cute but.. that was it. he didn't think much of you, honestly. don't get him wrong, he thought you were very cute and he would love to be friends with you! but.. he really didn't think that he's gonna fall in love with you later. he just enjoyed hanging out with you, talking to you, he loved the way you smile, he loved the way you laugh and.. wait, that's just him thinking you're cute, right? but not, like, in that way, right? because cater doesn't think he's quite ready to admit that he has feelings for you.
♡ cater is not sure how exactly it happened and why he got a crush on you. it's like.. he just feels more safe around you. it's like he can actually show you his real self and you won't judge him. of course, he's still not sure that you would actually be okay with him acting like his real self and he doubts that you would even like that side of his.. but for some reason he still feels like he can trust you. so he may or may not drop a few hints that make you go "cater. dude. are you okay." no, y/n, he's not okay, this poor man needs a hug.
♡ falling in love with you feels exciting and terrifying at the same time. cater feels truly happy when he's with you, he manages to forget about his problems at least for some time and his smile looks a lot more sincere than usual. but he's also.. scared. he doesn't think that you will love him back once you find out about his real personality, maybe you will accept it, sure, but would you really want a boyfriend like that? honestly, he should be grateful for you wanting to spend time with him even when he's being his "fake" self. he shouldn't ask so much from you, he should thank you for even just being friends with him. so whenever cater hears you laugh at his jokes, he feels genuine happiness but only for a second before he remembers that you will most likely never love him as much as he loves you. or will you?..
trey clover.
♡ just like cater, trey thought you were a nice person, but he didn't think you were.. you know.. his future love or something like that. he thought you were cute and he was always there to suggest his help if you needed it, but he really just thought that you two are gonna be friends and that's all. okay, maybe you two will be close friends. like, very close friends. but that's it. trey gave you so much attention and he had a habit to get a little bit too worried about you for no reason at all, but he thought that you're just.. well.. another younger sibling figure to him (your actual age doesn't matter). why else would he care so much about you?
♡ but oh no. it looks like you're actually something more to him. you're not just another younger sibling figure going "trey, i need your help!! ><". he would seriously think that he just likes you platonically and if it wasn't for cater, he would never realize that he actually likes you romantically. so what if he blushes a bit when you compliment his baking. so what if he thinks about you so often that it distracts him from his vice dorm leader duties. so what if he imagined spending the rest of his life with you- okay. okay, he understands what cater means now. maybe he really is in love with you.
♡ falling in love with you feels confusing for sure, but it also feels soft and sweet. trey may be a local mom friend who's always here to help his underclassmen out, but he has no idea what to do with his own feelings. should he just confess to you already or should he wait a bit? wait, do you even love him back? he has so many questions but almost no answers. but if you do love him back, trey will most likely notice it eventually. he's a smart boy, he had no idea that he actually has romantic feelings for you, but if you have a crush on him, he will definitely find out about it and when he does, he might start teasing you even more often.
savanaclaw.
leona kingscholar.
♡ oh boy. this guy definitely didn't expect to fall in love with you. no, he didn't expect to even become friends with you. you were just a weak little herbivore to him, nothing special, nothing out of ordinary. you were very a bit annoying sometimes too. but when you started saying things like "i want to get to know you better" or "i want to talk to you more".. that's when leona got very confused, though he didn't show it. why would you say things like that? what do you even want from him? is it because he's a prince? oh well, sorry to disappoint you, but he's actually a younger- "i just want to know why you're so lazy all the time.".. okay, this wasn't the answer he expected. he will tell you to go away, but don't pay attention to that, he's actually more interested in you now.
♡ leona just can't understand why you're like this. why do you spend so much time with him? why can't you just let him nap in peace? he actually jokes about you having a crush on him once and he expects you to go "h-how can you say things like that so casually!..". but you manage to surprise him again. "well what if i do? what are you gonna do then, huh?" okay, maybe he did underestimate you a little. just a little bit. you're slowly becoming more and more interesting and he hates to admit that he wants to know more about you. why? well.. he wants to know why you're so annoying all the time.
♡ falling in love with you feels weird, but also surprisingly entertaining. leona never knows what you're gonna do next and for some reason he even finds it exciting. he somehow manages to act like a tsundere and flirt with you at the same time. yes, he will go "ugh, why do you have to ruin my day like this" whenever you step on his tail while he's asleep, but he also will say things that make other savanaclaw students think that he's about to confess his feelings for you OR you two are actually already dating. does he know that he's in love with you though?.. he will need some time, but he will eventually realize it. and he's not gonna be happy about it.
ruggie bucchi.
♡ ruggie didn't really pay much attention to you at first, but he has to say that you're really fun to mess with. he never gets bored of seeing your reactions and sometimes he would steal stuff from you just to make you look at him. he knows that it probably sounds weird, but don't worry, he definitely doesn't have a crush on you, haha.. hey, why are you being so kind to him? why do you cook/buy food for him? why do you keep asking him if he needs any help? ah, maybe you just want a favor from him? you want him to help you with something, don't you? why would you have any other reason- "i'm just worried about you, that's all." oh no. oh no he's about to catch feelings.
♡ your kindness scares ruggie a bit, but he also keeps wanting more. he doesn't understand your motives, he doesn't understand why you're so worried about him. you just say things like "oh, i thought you were tired from doing leona's job all day" or "i thought you looked tired, so i just want to help you out, if that's okay". they may sound like nothing special, but ruggie feels weird whenever he hears you say stuff like that. he just jokes about you being too pure for someone like him, but he's actually kind of serious about it. are you sure you want to be friends with him? or.. maybe you're actually in love with him? don't worry, he's just joking around~
♡ falling in love with you feels fun at first, but it slowly starts becoming more and more scary when ruggie realizes just how deep and strong his feelings are. it's not just a small crush, he really is in love with you. he can't stop thinking about you and not a day passes without him wanting to see you. it feels strange to be treated so well without any reason at all, but ruggie just can't say no to your kindness. even though he keeps trying to make it look like it's nothing serious and you're just friends, he's actually this close to crying because he feels like he will never have a chance to be with you and you will never love him as much as he loves you. why would you even have feelings for him anyway?
jack howl.
♡ savanaclaw boys wouldn't find you that special when they first meet you and jack is not an exception. he thought you still have a long way to go and you have to put more effort in what you do. he also thought you looked too weak and "fragile", so he made sure to remind you to train more often, if you can, or to just take better care of yourself. i-it's not like he's worried about you. it just bothers him that you always look so tired all the time and it doesn't look like you get enough sleep too..
♡ however, you manage to impress jack and he's surprised to find out just how hardworking you really are. no matter what happens or how hard your life in twisted wonderland may get, you still try to achieve your goals. sure, you may whine a bit and say that it's unfair for a magicless human like you to go through so much, but you still do what you have to, no matter how weak you look. jack sure finds you more impressive than leona and he doesn't even notice how fast he starts to admire you and even fall in love with you.
♡ falling in love with you doesn't feel like something special because jack isn't even aware of his own feelings at first. he just thinks you're very cool and he respects you a lot and wishes to help you whenever he can. he just always wants to be by your side and support you when you need it. you're much stronger than he thought you were when you two just met, but he still thinks that in a world like twisted wonderland.. you deserve to be protected. and he's more than willing to protect you from whatever life throws at you. he realizes that he's actually in love with you when he notices that he feels a bit weird when you're around. this feeling is warm, but also so confusing.. and whenever you say goodbye to him, he doesn't want you to leave. b-but that's just because he admires you a lot, right?
octavinelle.
azul ashengrotto.
♡ azul didn't think you'd be that useful to him at first. it's not like he can make a deal with you or take your magic.. but still, being friends with a ramshackle prefect might actually help him in the future. so yes, he will try to become closer with you anyway. he's sure it will be easy to make you trust him, he just needs to make you believe that you can rely on him and who wouldn't want to have a friend like azul in such a scary world, especially as a human who has no idea how twisted wonderland works?.. well, it's actually not as easy as azul thought it would be.
♡ sure, you do want to become friends with him, but whenever he tries to help you with whatever you're struggling with (for a price, of course) or he tries to make himself seem as a kind person who genuinely wants to help others, you simply go "thank you, but i'm fine".. what do you mean, you're fine, y/n, he knows what crowley makes you do, just ask azul for help already! but as time passes, azul starts to notice that he actually wants to help you not because he needs you to make a deal with him.. but just because he really does feel bad for you and he wants to make your job at least a bit easier.
♡ falling in love with you feels strange and unexpected, azul wasn't prepared for this at all. he didn't think that he would actually become so attached to you, you were supposed to be another student who he can manipulate, so why do you feel like one of the most important people in his life now? he doesn't think that it's love at first, him thinking of you as his actual friend is already too much for him.. but then his overblot happens. and you forgive him for everything. and you tell him that no matter what, you accept him and even though he still has some.. um.. not so good qualities to work on, you'll be there to help him and support him. okay, maybe he actually is in love with you.
jade leech.
♡ jade thought you were an interesting and unique person right when he met you for the first time, but you were just that: an interesting and unique person. nothing more, nothing less. he would love to know more about you though, so don't be surprised if he starts talking to you more often or asking you more questions. this man wants to study you in a lab, okay. oh, and even though he sure does seem suspicious, he actually doesn't have any ulterior motives, unlike azul. he just can't go "hey, i like you, let's be friends', no, he has to act like his usual self that sometimes seems more dangerous than floyd.
♡ he doesn't even notice falling in love with you, but he sure notices becoming more interested in you for some reason. he always wants to know what you're up to, he wants to know more about your interests and he's always here if you need someone to talk to, whatever the topic is. he only starts thinking more about his feelings for you when floyd mentions jade being "totally in love with you". jade thinks floyd is just joking at first, but then floyd says that he was serious and jade's crush on you is more obvious than he thinks. and the funny thing is that.. jade is surprisingly casual about it. he just goes "oh. so i have a crush on them. okay". he never felt like this before, so he's a little confused, but it's not like he's about to have a breakdown because he just realized he's been in love with you this whole time.
♡ falling in love with you feels sweet and exciting. jade just thought you were a fun person when he first met you, but now it's hard for him to imagine his day without you. you've made him feel emotions he has never/rarely felt before. it's so unusual for him to worry about you, laugh at your jokes or be angry at someone who ruined your day. and trust him, all of those emotions are sincere. he's not pretending, you really made him feel all of this and even though he's not used to feeling this way, he can't wait to find out what else you're going to make him feel.
floyd leech.
♡ just like his twin, floyd already thought you were interesting when he just met you. he always followed you everywhere, he kept pranking you just to see your reaction and he thought that you getting annoyed with him was cute. and he found you even more interesting after he realized that even though he kept messing with you, you still let him hang out with you and didn't ask him to leave. huh, so you actually like his company, shrimpy? well, he's glad to hear that~
♡ floyd's feelings for you don't feel like a crush at all at first. he just thinks you're cute and that's it, really. but for some reason, he really hates it when he has to leave or when you don't give him enough attention. sometimes he takes a break (he doesn't tell azul anything though) from his work at mostro lounge just to hang out with you and he feels bored whenever you're not around. he has no idea why he feels like this, but.. who knows, maybe he really does like you, hehe.
♡ falling in love with you feels fun and full of surprises. floyd has never felt this way before and even though this feeling can be kinda annoying sometimes and it doesn't go away, he wants your relationship to become deeper and he wants to have more fun with you. just being friends is not enough for him anymore. you became an irreplaceable and extremely important part of his world and he hopes you feel the same about him.
scarabia.
kalim al-asim.
♡ kalim is kinda oblivious when it comes to crushes.. no, he's very oblivious. he really does believe he just likes you as a friend and even though it's true at first, as time passes, literally anyone can see that kalim treats you even better than people who he calls his friends. and considering how kind and friendly he is, this guy basically never leaves you alone even for a second and you get gifts from him every single day. he's constantly trying to come up with ways to make you happy and he thinks you have the most beautiful smile in the whole world. but yes, he definitely doesn't have a crush on you <3
♡ you and kalim would most likely have that friends to lovers dynamic. he's very easy to get along with and even though his energetic personality may be overwhelming sometimes, if he sees that you're tired or sad, he will tone it down a bit and ask you what's wrong. if you're not doing so well, he will genuinely worry about you a lot and he's okay with doing anything to make you feel better. he doesn't understand why your happiness matters to him so much, but.. maybe he just doesn't like it when someone is sad. and when YOU are sad, he feels like it's the end of the world and he has to do something about it immediately.
♡ kalim almost doesn't notice falling in love with you. he just thinks your friendship is becoming stronger and that's it. it's okay if he wants to hug you for a little bit longer, that's just because you're his best friend! it's okay if he wants to hold hands with you, he just doesn't want you to get lost and he's worried about you! it's okay if he wants to kiss you- oh. uh.. oh, you know, he means it in a platonic way! it's not like friends can't kiss each other! but if he actually wants to be more than friends with you.. would you be okay with that? wait, what is he even supposed to do with his feelings? maybe he should ask jamil for advice..
jamil viper.
♡ jamil's case is actually even worse because if kalim at least knows that you two have a good relationship and that you are friends, jamil is like "?? idk who you are to me. can i trust you. can i call you my friend". he thought you were okay when he first met you, but didn't pay too much attention to you, though he certainly appreciated you being.. you know, a more "normal" person than most nrc students (especially kalim). he actually feels like he can rely on you, honestly. he won't talk to you too much though, who knows what you're really like jamil if you're hiding something it doesn't mean that everyone around you is like that
♡ jamil doesn't understand why he feels so strange around you. at first he feels like he can trust you, even though he still tries to stop himself and tells himself that you can easily stab him in the back. and why are you so nice to him? you're probably just trying to become friends because you think that having a close relationship with someone like him could be useful, right? well, he's not gonna fall for that. and stop praising him all the time already. he told you that he's just a vice dorm leader and his abilities are not that special- wait, why does he feel good after hearing your compliments. oh no. oh no, he doesn't want you to stop.
♡ falling in love with you feels scary and jamil doesn't want to admit that he sees you not only as a friend (though he won't tell you that), but also as someone who he loves and wants to be with. you actually listen to him, you give him love and attention that he always wanted and you recognize his talents, but you still think that they are not the only good things about him and jamil is also just a very good person who deserves to be loved. jamil doesn't feel like he's ready to open up to you just yet, but he really doesn't want to miss a chance to finally find someone who will care about him as much as he cares about them.
pomefiore.
vil schoenheit.
♡ your relationship with vil definitely had a rough start. he criticized you a lot, he told you to take better care of your appearance, health and all of that. you felt like this guy hates you and tried to avoid him as best as you could. however, you were wrong and even though vil still thought that you could do better and you have some things to work on, he didn't hate you. in fact, he thought you were an interesting person who has their own talents and abilities, but they have to work on them more so that they can achieve their goals faster. so yeah, he basically tried to motivate you, but he probably didn't do a very good job.
♡ other people can notice vil giving you quite a lot of attention but not in a good way. it means that he's especially harsh on you. most students start to agree with you and think that the guy hates you, but his vice dorm leader knows that it's not true at all. rook is sure that vil is being so rude just because he believes you're better than most nrc students and he wants you to reach your full potential. but wow, it really feels like vil is almost obsessed with you. rook mentions that vil almost never stops talking about you lately and vil says that it's not true- no, rook, don't even joke about vil having a crush on you.
♡ even though vil sure has a lot of braincells, he almost doesn't notice falling in love with you as well. he really thinks he's just mad at you for not "trying hard enough", but this guy actually cares about you a lot. it may seem like he's angry at you and he hates you, but he's actually just very worried. what do you mean your sleep schedule doesn't even exist. go to sleep already, don't you know what happens to your skin if you don't get enough rest?? no, he's not worried about your health, it's just. uh. anyway, what about your hair-
rook hunt.
♡ finally. finally someone who actually knows they have feelings for you. though it may take some time for rook to realize that he's in love with you and not just admiring your beauty, he still would understand his feelings for you earlier than most characters here. he understands how romance works better than them, okay. very chad behavior of him sure, he thinks all people are beautiful in their own way, but you feel a little bit more special to him. his heart beats faster around you and he finds it hard to take his eyes off you. he never felt like this before around other students or people in general.
♡ rook would be very affectionate with you, however, he would take his time and wouldn't confess his feelings for you that early. he wants his confession to feel unique and special, he has to be prepared for that moment! he also needs some time to learn more about you. he wants to get to know you better, he wants to know what kind of person you are, how you see the world and he hopes that this way he will be able to predict your reaction to his confession. but of course, he doesn't do it just to earn your trust, he really is curious and wants to know more. you're just so interesting to him, he wants to know what exactly made him fall in love with you this hard.
♡ falling in love with you feels like a fairytale. it's so magical and exciting, rook wishes he never stops feeling this way. you are everything to him, all of his thoughts are about you and he's not complaining. he may joke about you distracting him from everything else, but he's actually more than happy and he doesn't mind being obsessed with you at all. yes, he may still compliment other people's beauty and talents, but don't worry, he has eyes only for you and he's more loyal to you than you think he is.
epel felmier.
♡ unless you make fun of his height, call him cute too often or refuse to take him seriously, epel wouldn't mind your company at all. who knows, maybe you two can actually become friends. and you do become friends! how fun! epel didn't expect to get along with you so easily, but he's more than okay with it. he's glad to have someone he can trust enough to talk about his true feelings and show his true personality to. he's more open and honest with you and he feels like you would never judge him no matter what he does or says.
♡ this feeling slowly starts turning into deep love and affection for you, though epel doesn't seem to notice that and still thinks you're just a friend to him. but he does notice feeling a bit more anxious around you now. why? well, it's like.. he wants to become better for you. he wants to impress you. h-he doesn't have a reason for that, really. he just.. wants you to notice how great and talented he really is. he wants you to praise him and smile at hiim while saying that what he did was amazing. again, he doesn't have a reason for that. totally.
♡ falling in love with you feels sweet and bitter at the same time. epel feels safe when you're around and he feels like he can tell you anything, but he's also scared that you actually don't think he's that special. he does slowly start to realize he's in love with you and that makes him feel even more scared. he needs to become a better person for you, he needs to become stronger, he wants to become someone who can protect you, who can impress you and who you can rely on. so forgive him for taking some time to work on that, he promises that he will tell you the truth when he's ready.
ignihyde.
idia shroud.
♡ idia genuinely doesn't understand why you're so nice to him. it actually scares him a little and he never knows what to expect from you. you're not as extroverted as some other nrc students, like kalim for example, but you still always run to idia whenever you see him and try to talk to him more. what do you want from him? you're just doing this out of pity, aren't you? it's okay, you don't have to give him so much attention, idia loves being alone, also he has online friends, so it's not like he's a complete loner or anything.
♡ you still try to get to know him better. you just want to help idia get out of his shell and become more confident. you don't think that being an introvert is a bad thing at all, but you still think that idia should start socializing more anyway. and you're sure that idia wants to make more friends as well, he's just afraid of being rejected. no, idia, you don't think that all these people are normies, you're just scared of them and trying to come up with an excuse so that you don't have to talk to them.
♡ falling in love with you feels sudden and predictable at the same time. of course idia shroud would fall for a person who's always there to support him and genuinely wants to become friends with him. he's affection-starved, okay? he may say that you can be really annoying sometimes, but he actually waits for you to text him or say hi to him every single day and if for some reason you can't talk to him, he feels lost and.. sad, even? please, don't leave him alone.. he knows that he's most likely too lame or boring for you, but he can't stand the thought of you leaving him.
diasomnia.
malleus draconia.
♡ i wouldn't call it love at first sight, but right after malleus met you, he knew that you're gonna become someone special to him. you didn't know anything about him. you didn't know his real name, status, his real identity. you didn't care about his reputation and you simply thought he seemed like an interesting person to talk to. he also seemed a little lonely too and you really could use a friend in a world like this, so yeah, that's how all of it started. he thought that the nickname you gave him was cute too.
♡ malleus gets used to your company too quickly. in fact, he can't imagine what he would do if you suddenly disappeared or simply lost interest in him. he got used to your kindness, to your smile, to your laugh, to your affection. his world becomes more warm and fun when you're around. but of course, he doesn't want this relationship to be too one-sided. he would do anything to protect you, help you or simply make you smile. you deserve the same happiness that you give him.
♡ falling in love with you feels soft and sweet, but also.. scary. malleus feels so happy when you're around, whenever he wakes up, he immediately thinks of you. you're everything to him. so if he loses you.. he will lose everything. he can't let you leave him. of course, he knows that you come from a different world and twisted wonderland isn't your home. he knows that you will leave him sooner or later. but.. is it selfish of him to want you to stay here for as long as possible? maybe you don't even have to leave?
lilia vanrouge.
♡ lilia thought you were cute right when he first met you. your reactions to his sudden appearances were so funny, it was hard for him to stop surprising you like this. at first your relationship dynamic was just like that, lilia kept surprising/scaring you, you screamed, he laughed and asked you to not be mad at him, he just likes your reactions too much. but as he started learning more about you, he realized that there are so many things he likes about you and it's not just you being an adorable scaredy-cat.
♡ for some reason, even though you wouldn't be able to tell from his behavior, lilia feels very calm when you're around. it's like his thoughts about his past and everything that he had to go through during his very, VERY long life can finally give him a break when he's with you. he doesn't have to worry about that, he can just stay here in present. and actually, he likes staying in present much more now thanks to you. but you're so naive, so innocent, so fragile, lilia thinks it's cute but he's also extremely worried about you because of that. you weren't made for this world. no matter how much you get praised for your job as a prefect, twisted wonderland is still too much for someone like you.
♡ lilia falls in love with you slowly, but when it happens, it feels so overwhelming, lilia has no idea what to do. he knows that having a romantic relationship with you is probably not the best idea considering that you'll have to leave this world someday and even if you don't.. he also doesn't have much time left. but if it's possible, if there's at least a tiny chance of him being in a happy relationship with you, he doesn't want to miss that chance. he may not have much time left, but he would do anything to spend all of that time with you.
silver.
♡ you and silver become friends surprisingly quickly. he knows he can trust you to wake him up when he falls asleep again, even though you think he looks very cute when he's asleep and you want him to get enough rest. whenever silver blames himself for being too lazy or incompetent, you're always here to remind him that he's already doing his best and he doesn't have to be so harsh on himself. he definitely will become a great knight one day no matter what, you believe in him!
♡ your kind words and your support make silver enjoy hanging out with you too much. he lets you watch him train, he finds it relaxing to take a nap when you're there with him and you run your fingers through his hair while he's asleep. even though he seems like a chill guy, he's scared of letting his father and his master down, but he always can rely on you when doesn't feel confident enough and he needs someone to tell him that everything is gonna be fine and lilia and malleus are already proud of him. and you're proud of him too.
♡ falling in love with you feels like a dream that he doesn't want to wake up from. he never thought his life was that bad, but it surely got better thanks to you. he wants to thank you for everything you did for him, he wants to protect you from all the dangers of this world. he knows that he wanted to become a knight so that he can repay lilia and malleus, but now.. he wants to be your knight as well. no, please, don't worry about him, he genuinely wants to do it. you always give him motivation to keep going and it would be an honor for him to become someone who can always protect you.
sebek zigvolt.
♡ yeah, your relationship with sebek wouldn't be that good at first. you two would argue a lot, he would never stop calling you a "lowly human" even though he's a half-human himself. and if you even think of saying anything bad about malleus, that's it, he's this close to killing you on sight. and you did hate sebek for acting like that at first, but as time passed, for some reason you actually started finding it.. entertaining? you loved to make him angry on purpose and then you decided to start teasing and even flustering him. yes, you did flirt with him multiple times just to see what kind of reaction he would give you, so what?
♡ sebek doesn't know how to feel about you. he knows he's supposed to think you're weak and pathetic because, you know, you're a human, but.. why does he feel so weird when you throw your dumb pickup lines at him? and why he feels like he actually wants to be praised by you and he wants you to notice how talented he really is? he knows that you're most likely not being serious most of the time, but he really wants you to be serious for once. uh, he just wants to be praised by you because he deserves it and that's it. it doesn't mean he wants you to be serious when you flirt with him, haha..
♡ sebek really didn't want to fall in love with you and he didn't expect to catch feelings for someone like you, but it still happened. he just doesn't understand why you still hang out with him even though he doesn't treat you that well. and how is he supposed to react when you tease him like that? he knows he should stay serious, but for some reason he just can't control his emotions when he's around you even though he's never that good at controlling them. he also realizes that even though you're a human, you're capable of doing many things and.. ugh, he really doesn't want to say it, but you're actually just as good as some magic users. y-you still have a lot to work on though.
royal sword academy.
chenya.
♡ you and chenya first met during that one unbirthday party after riddle's overblot. you were surprised to find out that a guy from a different school (and a rival school too!) was able to get here so easily and didn't care what nrc students will think of him. and also you thought that the way he could easily appear and disappear as he pleases (or he could just stay as a floating head) was funny. so yes, this guy managed to pique your curiosity.
♡ chenya himself thought you were quite interesting and he was even more surprised when he found out that you came to rsa secretly from other students just to see him. haha, you really betrayed your own school like this for him! wow, y/n, that's something only a lovestruck person would do! but he has to admit, he likes you even more now. just what kind of person are you? you're so full of mysteries and chenya isn't sure if he wants to know all the answers or it would be more interesting to keep it this way.
♡ falling in love with you is fun and exciting. you keep spending more time with chenya no matter what other nrc students think and chenya likes to make jokes about stealing you from nrc students so that you never have to leave him. is he just joking though?.. well, it doesn't matter. what matters more is that you both always end up having so much fun and you feel so comfortable with each other that there's been multiple times when one of you was very close to kissing the other. and lately, it's been very hard for you both to control your feelings.
neige leblanche.
♡ when you first heard of neige, you couldn't believe that someone like that actually existed. i mean, someone more beautiful and popular than vil? is that even possible? and when you finally saw him for the first time.. you were a bit underwhelmed. yes, neige is definitely very pretty, he's adorable, actually, but.. is that really it? but when you actually meet each other, you find it surprising just how nice neige really is. he's very polite, he treats you with kindness and makes sure you're comfortable. oh no, he's so cute, you're about to fall in love-
♡ you actually feel kind of pathetic for getting a crush on neige. it's just.. so predictable, you're really not that special and you're not any better than his fans. you doubt that he will ever notice you, you're just a magicless human from a different world, you don't deserve to be with someone like him. but what you don't know is that neige fell in love with you right when he first saw you. not because of your appearance, even though he thinks you're really pretty, but because of your personality, the way you treat other people and stay kind and patient no matter what. it's very impressive for someone who was basically forced to stay in this world against their will.
♡ falling in love with you feels like neige's life turned into an actual romance movie, but this time he doesn't know anything about the plot, especially the ending. he sure hopes you two will get your happy ending though. neige loves his fans and he really doesn't want to make them sad, he knows that dating someone when he's this popular is not the best decision, but he really, really wants to be with you. this is what true love feels like to him.
noble bell college.
rollo flamme.
♡ you were a bit intimidated by rollo when you first met him, you just.. thought he was a bit scary, haha. but then you noticed just how kind he is to you and that even though he's polite to all nrc students, you're a special case and you certainly are his "favorite". he also was the first person who actually thought you didn't deserve to go through all of this and that it must be very scary and overwhelming for you to have no other choice but to stay in this world full of danger and.. magic. so yes, you got used to his kindness pretty quickly, even though you still had a feeling that something is not quite right.
♡ and yeah, it turned out that rollo really wasn't the best person to trust. he hated magic with all his heart and he wanted it to disappear. and it was hard for him to choose between his growing love for you and his hatred for magic, but then he managed to convince himself that he's doing all of this for your own good and in the end you'll have no other choice but to agree with him. after rollo is defeated, he expects you to hate him as much as others hate him, but to his shock.. you forgive him. you had to deal with six overblots, even though nrc students saved the day this time, it's not like they're much better than him. so yes, you think rollo still can change and you want to give him a second chance.
♡ after that, rollo's love for you becomes even stronger. he can't stop thinking about you and it's hard to tell if he's in love with you or he's obsessed with you. when you have to go back to nrc, it gets even worse and everything around rollo reminds him of you. he really wishes you could spend more time together and he wasn't so focused on his plan. he's gonna be honest, he doesn't really regret doing.. well, all that, but the fact that he could use that time to talk to you more makes him think that maybe.. maybe trying to steal everyone's magic wasn't a good idea. yes, he thinks so only because he could spend more time with you instead of taking everyone's powers. listen, he needs some time, he will change. probably. maybe.
#twisted wonderland#disney twisted wonderland#twst x reader#twisted wonderland imagines#twst imagines#twst headcanons#riddle rosehearts x reader#ace trappola x reader#deuce spade x reader#cater diamond x reader#trey clover x reader#leona kingscholar x reader#ruggie bucchi x reader#jack howl x reader#azul ashengrotto x reader#jade leech x reader#floyd leech x reader#kalim al asim x reader#jamil viper x reader#vil schoenheit x reader#rook hunt x reader#epel felmier x reader#malleus draconia x reader#lilia vanrouge x reader#silver x reader#sebek zigvolt x reader#chenya x reader#neige leblanche x reader#rollo flamm x reader#rollo flamme x reader
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The Sex Love House PT 3
Summary: Welcome to the love house where a lot of stories will infold, 7 participants will have a chance to live together in the same house for a mounth while still doing their normal activities, will they find real love in this short period? Or at least this is what ur friend want u to believe. Part 1 Part 2
Warnings: a very manipulative!jay, manipulative!sunghoon, manipulative!heeseung, ex!bf!Jake, everyone is a perv in this house, reader is clueless, shameless reader, kinda stalker reader, Siyeon (from dreamcatcher) is also part of this, this is a pure filth, explicit content.
Smut warning: hand!job, oral (f), cum eating, desperate Jake, kind of subby!jake, p in v, unprotected sex (cause it's fiction), overstimulation, a lot of teasing, i think that's it
A/N: This part was supposed to go out a long time ago but i forgot to save it and i had to re-write it again so it's not as good cause i got annoyed sorry. Also this is not proof read so there might be some mistakes and typos so yeah
It's the week-end Jake woke up today going straight to ur room knocking on ur door before entering, u were still in ur shower robe hands blow drying ur hair as he looked at u through the mirror "oh hi i was going to talk to u after i finish, we didn't get a chance to yesterday" u said upon brushing ur hair.
He noded his head eyes scanning u, u got more beautiful since the last time he saw u, he's ngl he forgot about u at some point but he just woke up one day having u running through his head, what could u be doing now? Did u get taller? Did u let ur hair grow? How many relationships have u been through? He had these small thoughts about u, but everytime his heart tries to soften to u, the memory of ur ghosting and its side effects come back to him, it was like a trauma for him, getting in the way of every relationship he tried to be in, always having doubts about the other part, not able to trust her fully, he really has abandonement issues now.
"There is no need to bring back what happened in the past" u said getting him out of his thoughts, u turned off the blowdryer approaching him eyes softening now that he is close to u, ur guilt kicking in immediatly "m so sorry for what i did, i know nothing can excuse what i did but i wasn't mature enough" u said holding his hand in urs, he cleared his throat avoiding looking at u, pulling out his hand gentely and that was enough for u to know that he didn't forget u.
U sighed feeling bad but deciding to brush off the topic "so tell me, what r u doing now?" U asked hoping to get rid of the awkwardness noting how he didn't let a word out.
He smiled shrugging "i took over my dad's work"
U smiled back remembering how sweet his dad used to be and how good he treated u "i hope he is doing fine"
"He is" was all he replied with, taking a seat on ur bed "ahh right! Do u want something?" U asked after runing out of ideas to lighten the mood, he sighed hands massaging his forhead "i just wanted to ask if u have some pain relievers"
"Ohhh? Ur head hurts?" U asked hands busy searching in ur drawer for the said pills, taking it out and handing it to him "here" he took it from u thanking u and putting it in his pocket .
U sat on ur chair facing him now forgetting that u r still in ur robe that is about to open in any second now, ur hair isn't fully dry u look so... so tempting Jake's eyes can't help but stare at u head empty only u running through it.
"U don't want the guys to know that we were together?" U asked after talking for sometime now without getting a reply from him.
He cleared his throat again " ah idk i didn't know if u'd like them to find out so i chose to not say anything" he shrugged, u smiled at him he is still considerate as always "i don't really mind but since we didn't talk about it the first time let's just keep it between us"
He smiled back wanting to stay with u longer, seeing u now in front of him again brought back his old feelings towards u.
U heard ur phone ring on the table behind u "excuse me" u let out softly turning back and stretching to get it without standing from ur seat, exposing ur bare thighs and a faint sight of ur blue panties to Jake whose eyes were boring into u tongue darting on his lower lip , he gulped hands sweating and itching to feel ur soft skin, u smiled at ur succeed attempt to get ur phone seating properly now and answering ur call, Jake's eyes didn't leave u even for a second scanning the way u pout whenever something is not pleasing u, the way u roll the end of ur hair listening to what's been said on the other line, lips smiling from time to time flashing ur white teeth, everything about u was beautiful and he miss having u for himself.
U made eye contact with him in the middle of the call mouthing a sorry, Jake only smiling at u as he waited for ur call to end (but wishing it to take longer so he can drink in ur beautiful features more).
U ended the call that was from one of ur co-workers asking u about some file u wondering why tf they want that in the week end, u sighed looking at Jake noting the way he is looking at u.
"That took longer than i expected sorry"
He didn't budge even when u waved ur hand in front of him, only waking up when he heard ur soft voice calling his name and he almost let a sound out from that "are u okay? U r spacing out a lot" u asked concerned, eyes looking at the way his adam apple boped down before hearing him gulp loudly.
He shakes his head like he was in some sort of trance head dizzy as he inhaled u r fresh smell now that u approached him " m fine dw" u sat next to him, resting ur back on the wall and he followed ur movement head titling to face u " u r still as beautiful as u were" he let out making u blush a little bit as u give him a thank u chewing on ur lips fingers playing with the hem of ur robe.
He massaged his shoulders letting out a small groan and u turned to look at him he really look so tired "do u want me to give u a massage it's gonna help u relax a little bit" u said.
And he stayed still for a minute thinking about ur offer before noding in agreement, u stood up going to take an oil u use whenever u wanna relax "come on lay down" u rushed him and he did "i think it'd be better if u remove ur shirt" u said as he removed it and tossed it somewhere on the bed, u straddled his back he pressed his face on the matress upon feeling ur weight on top of him, his body shivering when the cold oil met his skin ur hands following after, massaging his nerves skilfully, he shut his eyes his body relaxing while releasing soft groans every now and then.
U were so good with ur hands he almost fell asleep if it wasn't for the unintentional scrach he felt on his back, u just continued working ur magic ignoring the way his body squirmed, u smirked a little bit knowing exactly how he liked that, u kept digging ur nails on his skin saying a sorry with a fake pout whenever u do so.
He could feel his muscles tensing up again, his forehead now resting on his hands teeth biting his lower lip not wanting to let a sound out, but it was impossible at this point especially when u brushed ur fingers faintly over his soft spot, u knew his body so well doing the most to get a reaction out of him, ur competitive side kicking out until a moan skipped his lips making u stop ur movements immediately "ohhh?" U said mockingly leaning forward until ur lips met his ears "u r still the same Jakey" he whimpered his hips humping the mattress shamelessly making u chuckle "what are u doing?" U asked faking a confused tone as u moved from his body standing in front of him. Jake titled his head looking at u confusion written all over his face, u cocked an eyebrow at him as he didn't stop his movements his eyes boring into ur body that was all exposed for him at this point, the robe not doing any job at hiding ur skin, the small curls at the end of ur hair still wet arms crossed waiting for him to speak but he didn't, u sighed clenching ur jaw slightly leaning forward lifting his chin with ur index finger "where r u looking? My face is here" u exclaimed wanting to get something out of him but his eyes are fixed on ur lips, u dart ur tongue on them watching how his own mouth is open almost drooling at the sight of you. Jake has always been like that, everything u did used to turn him on, and it looks like nothing changed.
U chuckled softely kneeling on the floor so u can face him blinking slowely as u caressed his cheeks titling ur head and getting closer to him until ur noses touched u were planing to tease him a little bit more but he rushed kissing u like he was starving for years, his lips moving so fast tongue rolling around urs u let go of his cheeks one hand now around his neck while the other one is searching for his hair tugging slightly as he moans in the kiss.
U left his mouth panting for some air, u looked his way and u can't help the heat that went to ur cheeks when u saw him, he looked so fucked out just from a kiss coming closer to kiss u again "so eager" u thought
U kissed him again his hands holding onto ur thighs, Jake now sitting properly without breaking the kiss making u also stand and straddle his lap, u started rolling ur hips slowly his hands following your pace, his thumbs tracing circles on ur inner thighs, ur hand going from his hair to his neck applying a small pressure and he groaned in the kiss.
"Shhh" u warned him and he whined in return making u smile in the kiss as ur hands traveled to his pants, unbuttoning them and sliding them down his knees along with his boxers, he let a deep breath out his body tensing up as he waited for u to touch him, the anticipation killing him.
"Please" he managed to mutter out his dick twitching in the cold air as his head tilted backwards and a sigh left his lips when u wrapped ur hand around his cock.
Ur thumb pressed on his slit collecting the precum that is oozing from it and spreading it along his length, his grip on ur thighs tighten as his body shakes under ur touch, he moaned in the kiss the need of breathing making him part his lips slightly, his moans were so loud despite him trying to stay silent his eyes were rolling to the back of his head.
His hips started moving up to meet ur strokes as his moans increased in volume, u felt him getting close, ur thumb now pressing on his slit again teasing him by stroking the base and going to the top before repeating the same process.
"Baby" he moaned against ur lips as his hips buckled upwards his stomach and chest rising, his hands are gripping ur thighs tightly, his nails digging in ur flesh, his toes curling as his mouth parted in a silent scream the only thing coming out of his mouth was a gasp as his eyes rolled back.
His dick twitched a few times his cum landing on ur robe and his chest, ur eyes were scanning the view, his head was still resting on the bed his eyes closed, his whole body shaking still feeling the waves of his orgasm, he was so sexy like this, and u can't deny that the thought of him getting off just from u stroking him made u so turned on, u were sure that your panties were soaked wet.
He was catching his breath when he felt u getting off his lap, he opened his eyes, his chest moving up and down, his dick still twitching as he saw the mess he made.
"Fuck y/n im sorry" he said trying to grab a tissue but his body was numb and his mind hazy.
U didn't pay him any attention going straight to ur closet pretending to get another robe and discarding the dirty one on the ground.
Jake was looking at u his dick already hardening again his eyes were roaming over ur body his gaze fixated on the curve of ur ass and the way the blue panties hugged ur thighs.
He wanted to eat u alive, he wanted to make u cry out his name, he wanted to fuck u, and u wanted the same, his dick was pulsating against his stomach, and all his senses were focused on u.
U felt his stare, turning back to face him a smirk forming on ur lips as u took a step forward and his hands were instantly on ur waist pulling u down on his lap, he attacked ur neck kissing, biting and sucking on it, he didn't want to leave a mark so he didn't suck for a long time, he went lower until his teeth bit ur collar bone his hands pulling down the new robe as his lips met the top of ur breast leaving kisses and licks.
"Oh" a sigh escaped ur mouth as u tilted ur head backwards, his right hand went down cupping ur clothed pussy while his left hand held onto ur waist for support.
He started moving his fingers, drawing circles on ur clothed clit, he didn't stop the movement of his mouth on ur breast as u started grinding against his hand. Jake was like a starving man, his touches so earger, his actions desperate.
U held onto his shoulders for support as he pushed u back laying on the matress, his body covering ur smaller frame as he started sucking on ur right breast his hand moving away the panties and entering two fingers inside ur pussy making you arch ur back as a gasp left ur lips.
His fingers were hitting the right spot and he went to kiss you again, his mouth making it hard to breathe, the pleasure was too much, ur eyes were watering, and his dick was rubbing against ur thigh, Jake broke the kiss panting like a dog delivering kisses on you stomach as his thumb was circling your clit, u were so sensitive his every move was sending shivers down ur spine, he was so focused on pleasing you, and it wasn't hard for him to get the job done, it's like he has been dreaming about this for a long time, he was now on a face level with your pussy he groaned biting his lips before replacing his thumb with his tongue, a scream slipped your lips and your back arched high in the air, his grip on ur waist was bruising, he didn't want to let go.
He hummed upon tasting you his eyes closed tongue going wild making it hard for you to contain ur moans and u were sure by now that if Heeseung was in his room he 100% have heard you, his room next to urs and that just added to ur heat making u go crazy, you were close by now already worked out just from earlier, Jake's finger went deeper making you let out a cry hands tugging at his hair and he moaned upon that "Cum for me" he mumbled against your pussy, the vibrations of his voice enough to make u reach your peak.
You cried out his name legs shaking uncontrollably, head dizzy, and chest heaving, and Jake didn't stop licking on ur clit not even giving u time to calm down and recover from ur first orgasm, "No-omg" your hands went to pull him away but instead you found them back on his hair pushing his face closer, his tongue was so skilled and u can feel yourself getting close again letting out small cries , the feeling of his tongue was so amazing and u can feel your whole body burning up, it didn't take long before u came again squirting on his face this time.
Jake pulled away his lips wet, face glistening with your juices, his eyes dark, "That's so fucking hot" he muttered licking his lips and wiping his face with his hands, he was looking at you hungrily, his cock red and dripping with precum, you wanted him inside you.
"C'mon here" u said pulling him closer for a sloppy kiss tasting yourself on his tongue as you started moving your hips, both of you were a moaning mess, the need to be close was so strong.
"Jake" u moaned against his lips and he hummed eyes still closed "fuck me" you said and his eyes shot open his mouth hanging open his breath got caught in his throat, and u smiled at him softly you were always a fan of his reactions always acting like he hasn't heard these words before as if it's his first time and you were sure that he was now going crazy, ur words made him feel like his heart is about to explode.
He didn't hesitate to get between your legs, his dick rubbing against ur wet folds as his mouth went to suck on your neck, your hands went to his back leaving red scratch marks as his tip was pressing on your hole, the need to enter was strong his eyes scanning your expressions as he entered you, a satisfied sigh escaped both of you lips, you were so warm and wet around him he didn't have any energy to start slow, his thrusts were hard and rough his hands holding onto the sheets as his hips met yours with a slap, the air was filled with your moans and the sound of skin slapping, the bed creaked underneath you and you could hear it hitting the wall, it's not a surprise if u end up with a hole in the wall, and he was going so fast he didn't give you a chance to adjust his cock hitting the right spots, "fuckk you feel so good Damn" he groaned his hips moving by themselves his head dropped enjoying the way you feel around him, your hands went to his back pulling him closer wanting to feel him deeper, his chest was now touching yours, his skin was so hot and he was sweating a lot, you can see his veins popping his mouth hanging open as his forehead was touching yours, his thrusts becoming more aggressive and it was hard to catch your breath, you can feel yourself getting close for the third time tonight your stomach twisting and your eyes rolling to the back of your head, Jake's hand moved away from the sheets gripping the headboard as he was slamming into you loving how you moan his name, he was close, so close, his dick twitched inside of you.
He was so lost in pleasure he had other plans for you but he forgot about everything focusing only on the delicious feeling of you he swear he hasn't felt this good since being with you, he doesn't know why but u just enjoys it more when it's you, his thrusts were now unrhythmic moaning as his hands went to the pillow and you let out a surprised yelp when his other hand grabbed a fistful of your hair pushing your head back loving how you look for this angle ,his cock was throbbing and pulsating inside you the knot in your stomach was so tight and you could feel yourself reaching your peak, Jake was grunting his eyes shut curses leaving his lips "fuckk fuck fuck" and you could feel the tears building up so sensitive from the previous releases and it was a matter of time before both of you came at the same time, he pulled out after spilling his seeds all over your stomach.
He let go of your hair and collapsed on the bed next to you, both of you were panting your minds were blank and the air was still thick, the room smelled of sex, Jake's hair was sticking to his forehead, his chest was moving up and down, the only sound in the room was the heavy breathing. You were laying there trying to come back from the high, you looked at Jake his eyes closed, his face still sweaty and red, your eyes moved lower, his chest and stomach are covered with his own cum and he didn't seem to mind.
You chuckled "what?" He asked eyes opening to look at you.
"Look at the mess" you said pointing at his stomach, he sat up a little bit checking it out wanting to say something but he stopped after seeing you crawling, ur hands dropping his body back as u leaned down collecting all the cum that was on his body licking it up making sure to leave no trace behind Jake had to slap himself to see if he was dreaming, his eyes were bulging and his mouth was dry 'fuck you are so sexy y/n" it was too much, too many feelings all at once, it was hard to control the heat pooling in his groin and he can feel himself getting hard again, he let a deep breath out when you stopped to show him the cum u collected before swallowing it.
"Fuck so dirty" he said pulling you for a heated kiss, your tongue battling his for dominance, he was already hard again his body was aching for u and u couldn't help but rub your pussy against his shaft.
"Please" he begged, and as much as u wanted him you were sure that your body can't take anymore, already sore from yesterday and the events that took place minutes ago.
"Next time Jakey" u said pecking his lips and he whined, his hands went down to rub your pussy and u let him, u were sure that you can't do it but a few moments later u were bouncing on his cock again.
-
You sighed after what happened Jake stayed with your for a bit helping you move to the shower wanting to help but u stopped him wanting to relax for few minutes and have an alone time and he nodded pecking ur forehead and leaving. You took longer than intended cleaning your body lazily, you went out expecting to find a mess in ur room, ur robe thrown on the ground along with ur panties and the sheets wrinkled but instead everything was neat your clothes on the basket another sheets on the bed and that alone made your day.
Jake was sweet and caring as always and ur heart ached with guilt, ur mind was still in shock from everything but you didn't have the energy to spend a long time thinking, you dressed up wearing a long blue dress with a small slit on your left leg, drying your hair only with a towel putting on some perfume and walking out. U heard some noises on the living room and u followed finding everyone except from Jake and Siyeon sitting on the table having breakfast
Jay's eyes followed your every move his jaw almost dropping, the sight of your thighs driving him insane and it was so unfair, "wow y/n u look so beautiful" Heeseung said devouring you with his eyes and Joy nodded her head while Sunghoon didn't say a thing his eyes scanning u head to toe while stuffing his mouth with food, Joy pulled the chair next to her patting it for you "come on". She is such a sweetheart and u can't help the smile forming on your lips, you took the seat sitting now between her and Sunghoon and across from Heeseung and Jay, a small groan slipping Jay's lips when he saw u sitting so close to Hoon, his eyes were dark remembering yesterday's night but he wanted to take care of you today not liking how he let u go without helping. He grabbed ur plate putting a big amount of various food and handing it to u making u chuckle "i don't think m gonna be able to finish this but thank u" u said softly making him smile as well "enjoy, u need to regain ur energy".
Joy and Heeseung were talking about something but u can't pay attention u didn't realize how much hungry u re until u had ur first bite of food. "I thought u were going out this morning" Heeseung asked eyes not leaving ur face wondering what kind of excuse u'll make after he woke up to ur moans and you could feel ur cheeks heating up remembering the events that took place just few hours ago, u cleared ur throat shaking ur head "i changed my mind" u replied trying to avoid eye contact and laughing awkwardly afterwards, Heeseung grinned nodding his head pretending to believe u "Ahhh i see" he said. Joy's eyes roamed on the table "Where is Siyeon?" she asked particularly no one and Jay answered "She still have things to do at her house but she'll be back this afternoon"
"Where is Jake?" Sunghoon asked after a while and Jay was the one to answer him again "He left few minutes they called him from work"
U nodded, it was obvious that he didn't want anyone to find out, "How did u sleep last night?" Heeseung asked u and Jay chocked on his drink while you almost spit your food, Sunghoon who was taking a sip of his tea was now coughing loudly, Joy turned to look at him her eyebrows raised "are u ok?" She asked and he gave her a thumbs up eyes watering, Heeseung was laughing at the reaction of everyone his eyes meeting with yours and you could feel the heat on ur cheeks. "Oh my god u look like a tomato" he commented still laughing and u kicked his leg with ur feet under the table so embarrassed wishing that a black hole could swallow u and take u away from this place.
Sunghoon was now smirking loving to see u in that state remembering meeting with you yesterday when u were about to head to ur room after getting out of Jay's room sweating, face flushed and lips swollen ur robe closed messily and ur hair was in a very terrible state, u stopped at ur steps upon noticing his shadow turning to see him in front of you and u really tried to act normal but there was no point of that at that rate, so u just decided to do what u do everytime = running to ur room and die from shame! u hated that it's Sunghoon who caught u all the time and u weren't sure that u'd be able to look at him the next day but u managed to do that somehow. The table went silent again until Heeseung spoke again "i was just asking cuz it was too cold yesterday and the heating system wasn't working for me so i went to ask u if it works for u but u wasn't in ur room"
"Ahh yes" u lied "i was probably in the kitchen i got so thirsty and i didn't bring water to my room before sleeping" u mumbled, ur words beating u making Sunghoon laugh again impressed by ur ability to lie that fast. Heeseung and Jay were grinning knowingly, Joy didn't seem to understand the whole situation but she shrugged continuing what she was doing on her phone. U finished eating not daring to lift ur head again rushing to clean the table and do the dishes and u almost tripped, ur legs still sore from earlier if it wasn't for Sunghoon who catched u his hands around your waist holding you close, he chuckled his lips next to your ear his hot breath tickling you "are u still thirsty?" he whispered making u push him away chewing on ur lips, he chuckled again "just kidding watch out ur steps" he said tickling ur chin and leaving, making u freeze on ur spot questioning wtf was that about before walking out to the kitchen.
Jay followed u the thought of u doing the dishes while obviously looking tired not clicking with him, he insisted to do them instead asking u to have a rest in ur room, u sighed defeated and went back to the living room not wanting to spend ur time alone knowing that u'll just gonna be having unnecessary thoughts so u hopped on the couch laying there next to Joy who was watching some random insta reels and she smiled creating more space for you "what are u watching?" u asked her softly, Joy positioned her phone to match it with ur sight "just some reels" and u nodded watching videos with her while talking about some random stuff, u sighed the mic on ur back making u uncomfortable, "u should sit in the middle" Joy suggested but u shook your head "it's fine" you replied and Joy frowned not satisfied but she didn't say anything.
After some minutes Sunghoon walked to the living room sitting accross from you, his eyes not leaving ur body and u tried not to meet his gaze, his stare was so intense and intimidating and u wished he ignored u like earlier, "y/n" he called your name and ur heart skipped a beat it was probably the first time u heard ur name skip his lips, Joy looked at him raising her eyebrow but watching ur interaction quietly "yes?" u answered voice almost unheard and Sunghoon smiled, he loves when ur all shy and awkward with him, he cleared his throat before speaking "u wanna go on a date with me?" he asked u making ur eyes widen u certainly was not expecting this from him especially and u were wondering for a second if u've heard him correctly "uh?" u managed to let out and Joy couldn't stop herself from giggling next to you, Sunghoon didn't lose his charming smile making ur insides melt not even bothering to repeat his question, u looked at Joy for help, this situation almost awkward, she was smiling at you encouraging you to give him an answer, "umm... sure" u said after some moments, Sunghoon was waiting patiently and he seemed happy with your reply and Joy clapped her hands excitedly "great then it's settled" she said and u could feel yourself drowning, not knowing what to do and what to expect ur face as red as Joy's phone case ur eyes still looking at Sunghoon who didn't drop his smile now smirking at u, his eyes so intense making u question ur respond "i hope i don't regret that" u mumbled only for u to hear.
This part has been sitting in my drafts for a long time sorry :( but yeah this was not how i wrote this part originally nd it really sucks that i didn't save it but yeah hope u enjoy ^^ the next part is gonna be super intense, spoiler: it'll be both Sunghoon and Heeseung focused and oh god this duo is a lot!
#enhypen smut#enhypen x reader#enhypen fanfiction#enhypen jake#enhypen sunghoon#sunghoon smut#sunghoon x reader#enhypen heeseung#kpop smut#kpop fanfic#enhypen jay#park jongseong#jake sim#lee heeseung#sim jaeyun#heeseung x reader#lee heesung x reader#heeseung smut#heeseung enhypen#enhypen jake x reader#enhypen jake sim#enhypen jaeyun#sim jayun#jaeyun x reader
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The recent Chappell Roan thing is why I absolutely hate the lack of political literacy in this country. Big-name celebrities think they're really cooking when they say "well Kamala still supports blowing up Palestinian babies because she won't cut ties with Israel, so therefore I'm not voting for her and you shouldn't either! Both her and Trump suck so I'm not voting/voting third party!"
Like it or not, Israel is an ALLY of the United States. We CAN'T just cut ties with them unless it's a long drawn-out process, and even then it's probably NEVER going to happen. This is basic shit we learned in social studies, holy shit!
Trump would be so much fucking worse for everyone involved, including Palestine, and not voting or voting third party is pretty much just handing your vote over to Trump due to how voting WORKS in a two-party system dictated by the fucked up electoral college.
This was a long ramble and you've probably gotten similar asks the last few months like this, but fuck, I just have to get this off my chest, and the most recent event with her was like the straw that broke the camel's back. Celebs in general need to shut the fuck up about politics unless they are actually partaking in activism instead of this virtue-signaling bullshit.
Taking things one thing at a time.
I'll admit to having only seen Chappell Roan's final video on the subject, so idk what she said before that (outside of generally)
The two things that really stuck out to me and pissed me off about that live/video was she 1. accused Democrats (she said "the left" but was clearly in context talking about the Democrats) for "transphobic policy" (also genocidal, equally silly) and it was SUCH a groundless lie, such a baseless, stupid, uninformed, silly lie. It'd be like saying "yes the right is bad! but Kamala Harris says she wants to shoot a pony every day of her Presidency and I can't support that!" And to be a Queer artist who's whole thing is centering Queer art, particularly drag who's got a young maybe not very informed queer fan base who's made talking about trans rights your main political thing to just lie about the nature of the threat to trans rights and trans lives at this moment is fucking awful and downright criminal.
Listen right now Republicans are aggressively attacking Democrats on trans rights. Trump went after Harris at their debate for "trans surgeries for illegal aliens in prison!" Republicans are attacking Tim Walz as "tampon Tim" for the idea that he supports trans male students having access to tampons (and other crazy transphobic attacks on him) Republicans are centering transphobia as a main campaign issue, anyone who gives a fuck about trans people in this nation should know Trump and Creepy Vance in charge of the federal government? is the nightmare. You can't claim to care about trans people or be "centering" them and not be doing all you can to stop Republicans at the ballot box this November. And both siding it and saying bullshit that somehow it will be just as bad if Democrats win is not stopping Republicans no matter how you personally vote.
The Second thing in her video that really annoyed me was she said she was voting for Harris but then had a whole word salad about how everyone needed to make up their own minds about who would be best. Basically saying that while she was voting for Harris, a vote for Trump was a reasonable conclusion people could reach. Again if you truly care about the issues she says she cares about, no, you can't vote for Trump. And again to use your platform to push "both sides" is to throw the very people you claim are your brand under the bus in the worst way.
I don't like to throw people under the bus for their family, Tim Walz' brother is a MAGA lunatic for example, but Chappell Roan talked about Republican family that "loved her" and I can't help but wonder if she was thinking of her Republican State Rep uncle, Darin Chappell. Again people can't control family members and I'm not asking anyone to come out and attack their family in public. I'm just wondering if her views on Republicans and finding a middle ground and "they still love me" is colored by Uncle Darin and not understanding he might love her and be proud of her but he still walks into the Missouri state capital and votes for abortion bans and transphobia.
to move onto the meat of your ask which I think is less about Roan in particular and more generalized about a certain type of celebrity and GenZ very on-line types. On the whole Israel-Palestine thing, I think most of the people posting about it know very little or know a lot of misinformation, you every see people boldly posting "I don't need to know everything to know right from wrong!" you run into that a lot. And I'd say yes, you do need to know a lot to comment on a complex multi generational ethnic-political conflict with many state and non-state actors.
Last night JD Vance and Tim Walz had their debate and every time there was an issue, housing costs, medical costs, gun violence, inflation, Vance would move it around to how if we just deported all the immigrants the issue would be fixed, no more drugs no more gun violence, housing would be cheap, just get rid of the people I don't like.
And I see a lot of that with Israel, "Palestine is a climate issue!" "Queer as in Free Palestine!" etc where if we just get rid of Israel it'll all be fixed. Which of course connects to long standing antisemitic ideas about Jews running the world, people happily sub in the word "Israel" or "Zionist" and then repeat the same old racism thats followed the Jews around for 1,000 years.
So long and short I think most people talking about Palestine don't know enough to talk about it, but what's worse don't really care about Palestine at all
I'm reminded here of Trump's "Deal of the Century". Oh? you don't remember it? shocker, in January 2020 Trump released a "peace plan" drawn up with no Palestinians involved, where Israel would be allowed to annex everything in the West Bank it would want, the Jordan Vally cutting Palestine off from Jordan and totally encircling it with Israel. The West Bank would be Swiss cheesed up into little pockets connected by tunnels or overpasses but with Israeli territory running through it everywhere. The Palestinians said "no!" and then Netanyahu claimed that Trump had green lit Israel to annex the land it wanted even without Palestinian agreement to the plan and without giving the Palestinians anything. There was some confusion and thankfully that didn't happen. We may never know the fully story of what stopped it, but I do think Trump agreed to annexing much of the West Bank, but pulled back under pressure from Gulf Arab Oil states who later in 2020 made peace with Israel in the Abraham Accords in an effort to stop Netanyahu's annexation plans.
any ways to point out, 1. Palestine was on the edge of annexation the end of the dream of Palestinian statehood in any meaningful sense, and where were the protests? the encampments? etc? it never comes up, 4 years ago, and all the people who live and breath this stuff never mention it? 2. We have reason to believe Trump signed off on a far-right government of Israel annexing much of the West Bank, his "peace plan" abandoned the outlines that American Presidents since Bill Clinton set forward for getting a Palestinian state on 95+% of the West Bank in favor of "what does the Israeli right want?" and again no one is talking about it in the context of this election, we know what he'll do, because he's done it before.
but again its not really about the Palestinians, its not about building a Palestinian state, its "get rid of Israel" and then what? what happens to the 9 million people who live in Israel? and people don't have a realistic answer, because its a political fantasy that if they just do X everything will magically get better, even on totally unrelated issues.
#election#election 2024#politics#US politics#American politics#Kamala Harris#Tim Walz#JD Vance#Donald Trump#Chappell Roan#trans rights#transphobia#Israel#Palestine#antisemitism#ask#answer
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Non Dimenticar
three times in which you needed minho, though it wasn't in you to ask
➠ lee minho x reader
➠ wc: 1.7k
➠ summary: both you and minho are independent induviduals, and that aspect thrives in your relationship. though it makes it hard for you to reach out to him when you need it. you and him learn that sooner or later you both will have to learn how to ask for help.
➠ warnings: slight angst (maybe its normal level angst idk its pretty sad), mentions of passing out, mentions of injury, mentions of hosptial/emergency room, overworked reader
➠ masterlist
➠ a/n: i am currently a little tipsy and therefore this is not proofread
he gets it. he really does. he understands because he is the same way. all his life, he has had the same mentality, but now that he’s met you, he has learned; and perhaps it was because you were so similar in that sense that he learned what it looked like from an outside perspective.
it was your inability to ask for help and openness to receiving it.
minho, as well, struggled with this. throughout his life he had that mindset. one of, ‘whatever is happening will pass. you must power through. don’t drag others down with you,’ and he knew what it felt like from a personal level. pretty much, you both lived a very much ‘just thug it out’ lifestyle. minho never saw it as too much of a problem though. it didn’t seem to hurt others, in his eyes it kept them safe even, ignorance is bliss, no? but that was until he met you.
minho saw in you, the struggle that was deep within him. the one many urged him to overcome, because he never would see any issue in it.
the first time he began to become aware was when the two of you were working out. you were both doing bicep curls, your attention on the mirror in front of you as you counted your sets. minho and you took turns and he was using a heavier weight than you, so naturally you dropped yours in favor of letting him switch the plates. you must have been distracted however, and in switching, you accidentally dropped the heavy plate onto your big toe. minho wouldn’t have even noticed if his eyes weren’t trained on you at all times. you didn’t even make a sound when it dropped on you, just an airy hiss, and through your reflection in the mirror you tried your best to play it off. the weight was heavy enough to raise concern, there was no way that didn’t affect you. therefore, minho spoke up,
“hey, you good? that looked painful” he grabbed your arm as you stepped away.
you shook your head, “nah. i’m fine. i’ve had worse,” a chuckle leaves your lips in an attempt to put your boyfriend at ease.
minho gave you a look. one of uncertainty. though he didn’t want to pry. he knows that even if it was hurting there is a reason you aren’t asking him for help.
perhaps he should have asked though. you didn’t say anything further but he couldn’t help but notice the quite obvious limp you wore as you walked out of the gym. he noticed, as he peeked at your uncovered foot when you got into bed with him that your toe began to swell and bruise a nasty shade of purple. he noticed the way, even after days, you struggle to put your full weight onto your foot. he urged you to see a doctor, but you brushed it off, saying that it’ll heal on its own, you’ve had worse.
again, he didn’t pry and you never brought it up. though he knows now to keep a close eye on you at the gym.
the second time was probably the most brutal. what started as a simple stomach ache soon became an even worse pain that had you doubling over in pain. be it cramps, your pesky lactose intolerance, or food poisoning, you always had an excuse for when minho began to worry. because naturally he would become worried at the sight of you rendering unmovable due to the pain. though no matter what, each time you would ease his mind with a new excuse and a wave of your hand. the excuses lasted a while. though it was only a matter of time until something worse happened. he had gotten a call from you late into the evening, “hey…” your voice was low, it sounded as if you were far from the mic, “can you… can you uh pick me up. i’m at that pho spot near your place. i’m- i… uh don’t think i can drive home.”
“did you drink?” he had asked. you had told him no, but offered no further explanation. he could tell there was something you didn’t want to tell him; he knew there was a reason you sounded hesitant to ask for his help.
minho had been right because upon arrival he was met with your nearly passed out form, drooping from the driver’s seat of your car. he rushed to you, and you were conscious, luckily. though you did let out a loud groan in pain, your hand clutching your abdomen tightly. without another thought, he rushed you to the emergency room.
fate was on your side that night. appendicitis. the doctors had told you that you were lucky that you hadn’t waited. if it were perhaps a day later, your appendix may have ruptured. the two of you shared a brief look as the doctor debriefed you. it was a knowing look.
during your surgery minho thanked every star in the sky that night. he also made sure to schedule himself a check-up with his physician as well. he had to take care of himself to take care of you, is what he told himself.
the third time wasn’t a physical injury per say. minho caught you in your room. using the spare keys you gave him, he welcomed himself into your apartment as he normally did, though you weren’t expecting him this time. he wanted it to be a surprise. he knew you were studying hard and came in to surprise you with your usual coffee order and some homemade pastries felix made.
instead he found you at your desk, uncomfortably splayed out before your computer. surrounding you were litters of paper and textbooks, most with notes and formulas, but as he looked closer there were papers completely scribbled out, torn, crumpled; it looked like a disaster. he couldn’t count the amount of tabs open of your computer, the chaos that reigned the screen made his head hurt just looking at it. there were at least 2 empty coffee cups on the floor and another on the table, the ice melting into the now lukewarm americano. his hand cropped the one he brought you a little tighter.
“sweetheart?” he questioned carefully, kneeling down to reach face level with you.
though you were curled up, he caught a clear glimpse of your face. you looked nearly lifeless and his heart shattered. minho knew it was just finals. he knew that you were probably fine, but what made him break was the fact you were going through it all alone. it had been days since you contacted him, and it wasn’t an issue for him, the two of you were good at maintaining your own personal time, and as per usual he never pried. but the thought of you, pulling through like this for days left his stomach falling into the deepest pits within himself.
“my poor baby…” his finger traced your cheek, now squished against the table. your skin was dull, eye bags too present, day old makeup faded and smudged all over your eyes. minho kicked himself for not coming sooner.
minho’s arms curl under you and he pulls your body into his arms. you’re so knocked out that you barely notice the movement. as if it were second nature, you curl into his hold as he hoists you up. his face softens a little as you do so, relieved that even in this state you know to trust him completely. his arms bring you to your bed where he carefully tucks you in, giving a gentle pat on your head as he moves to clean up your desk.
scattered papers and endless notes littered the surface of your desk. it wasn’t just your desk though. your room itself was left in a messy array, the days of stress piled up and you couldn’t bring yourself to clean, as litter and clothes became too much to handle. without a second thought, minho cleaned, folding clothes, tossing garbage until your room was spotless. he finished at your desk, beginning to pick up your papers as you woke.
silently, you approached him, your hand resting on his from behind as he gathered some sheets of paper,
“minho…” you said groggily, “don’t worry about it… i-i’m not finished with those. gotta finish them then i’ll clean it up”
you attempted to grab the notes but he stopped you. his hand took the papers from your own. without a word he continued to gather the papers and pile them neatly to the side. you didn’t have any energy left to stop him, to argue. you just let him do this thing. after he powered off your computer, he finally turned to you. his hands now rested on your cheeks, gently brushing the soft skin on your face. his head tilted at you as if you were one of his cats, his thumbs brushing the crusty makeup around your eyes.
“did you sleep well?” finally he spoke
”i have a lot to study…”
”did you eat today?” he continued
“there’s only one more day before my project is due…” he remained quiet and continued to caress your face, “… i won’t have time to study after my classes and…” you began to lean into his touch, softening up from both your sleepiness and his affection, “…and…” you could melt into the way he looked at you right now, “…and i have to finish… i’ll rest when i…”
”you must be so tired, hm?” there was no other infliction in his voice aside from affection
“…yeah,” you admit, “…i’m really tired.”
tears began to well in your eyes as you dipped your head down. he didn’t let you though, using a gentle finger to tilt your head back up. new tears traced down the same path as the ones that were now dried on your cheeks.
“let’s go take a shower?” he asks and you nod. his hand leads you to your bathroom as he begins to use your makeup remover to gently wipe the makeup from your face.
his hands are too gentle, you think, as he cleans your skin.
”after this, we can study in bed, yeah? together.” he gazes down at you as he tosses one wipe for another, “next time… please call me. i know you want to do this alone, i get it, i thought the same way too. but now that i have you, i could never want to be alone again. trust me when i say, i will never be tired of being with you, helping you, no matter what it is. just please, call me when you need me,” he presses a soft kiss to your forehead, “i promise i’ll call you when i need you too.”
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#skz#stray kids#lee know#lee know angst#lee know x reader#minho x reader#minho angst#minho stray kids#lee know stray kids#lee minho#lee minho stray kids#minho
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Why is Soul always the most difficult one to design? I don't know. But, he's FINALLY here.
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Looking less human every time I draw it.
THE COLORS. ... Soul's shadow side gave me issues with color, I wanted it to be a darker red, but it didn't work well with the different line art. Soo a deep grey, yay.
And I never really made that side of Soul reminiscent of the actual videos. But it looks nice.
Now you might maybe (or maybe not) wondering what it means by "first to exist". I had a thought, since this is literally a person's inner workings, maybe HMS could exist one by one at certain stages of life. Though, they'd all be close in existence. Sooo Soul would be the first, he is the host after all. And a vessel needs a soul.
And Heart would be second. Why? I don't know if emotions come first, or maybe both Heart and Mind can come at the same time. But guess Mind's the youngest here. Surprising. Anyways.
Soul can basically rip off his tail, yeah. Seen that already. They can also cry a river of static.
If I were to describe Reasons in one way, It'd be an older sibling trying to keep their cool under so much chaos everyday, that they'd eventually become so used to everything happening, that one little issue is the last straw. Loves his siblings, but can get on his nerves.
Everything else from the other posts still happen. Darrell still exists. Companion chicken.
It also has a bit of an identity crisis, how does that work when it's a part of yourself?
Well. It's like a feeling of being lost. Whole can get lost on himself, and in turn, would obviously affect Soul in the process.
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I think I'm done with this... explanation? Idk? But I think that's all.
I hope Heart and Mind are easier to finish.
And I wish this random wall of words cheers you all up.
Yeah it's a character headcanon thing, but even if it is that. I hope this gives you something nice to look at. /gen
Something fun.
Enjoy.
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#chonny jash#chonny jash fanart#chonnys charming chaos compendium#chonny jash soul#cj soul#cccc#cccc soul#cj headcanons#why didn't I put that on the last one?#idk#long post#well this is a character reference so#and yes the song hey doctor doctor fits Soul to me#idk something about it just works#i know what songs the other two can have#and I almost gave this post a Will Wood song because yes#I just realized the jacket is backwards on the back reference...#oh well#Spotify
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Thoughts on tmagp episode 24
*cough* my sister had a newborn a few months ago. Here’s some red flags about “the health visitor” from today’s episode:
- newborns feed every 2-3 hours, usually 2.5. Idk if this is different in the UK but I don’t see why it would be.
- most babies are born with greyish eyes, which changes over time. If Rupert’s a newborn when she’s talking about his black orb eyes, this is maybe a red flag?
- “I couldn’t scream, I didn’t want to wake him” AHHHHHH oh god the psychological horror of having a newborn aghfjgjfhhhhhh
Very Rosemary’s Baby, but instead of going full satanic panic, “Raising Issues” focuses on the self-sacrificial narrative mothers are told, and how that leads to a dangerous and isolating situation as Patricia ignores every red flag in sight. I had my head in my hands. Honestly, I wish we’d dived deeper into the socioeconomic stuff rather than the body horror because back to back with “A New You” it felt like too similar of a story structure, even though imo they’re meant to be parallels.
23 and 24 have been so similar that they’re definitely intentional contrasts to each other. One’s from Chester talking about how you can long to change yourself so fully only for it to all go wrong, and this one’s from Norris about destroying yourself to support the one you love… I am ill, actually. Screaming crying relistening to the last recording in this case file and finding all the points that are reminiscent of Mag 170 (Recollection).
These lines specifically are making me think. Once again, I am ill.
Chester: “Alesis Newman is leaving this world and whatever comes next – though she may look like me in some ways, though she may carry a part of me with her – she’ll be better. Free of all my mistakes. Perhaps people will like her more than me. I already like her more than me. I want to see her walk off happy and strong. I hope she doesn’t feel this now, just be the good parts of me. (hoarse) I hope it’s like I dreamt, I hope she has my eyes…”
Norris: “I can’t remember when… when I last… had sleep. I think… I think days…” + “I don’t know what’s going to happen. There’s not much of me left. I’m so scared. But at least Rupey’s happy…”
Considering this is the first Norris case file in over 10 episodes (since episode 12, unless I’m wrong) and he’s literally just reading the stuff between recordings, I’m a bit concerned.
Who the fuck is reading this statement and why didn’t they mention it to Celia IMMEDIATELY? If it was Sam, he knows she has a kid and is in a support group, and if it was Celia herself, then idk why she isn’t at least concerned (that’s suspicious, Celia.) I guess Gwen and Alice don’t know about Jack, so they’re off the hook.
ALSO rupert? A red name? Philosopher’s stone alchemical reference? Or just referring to the blood he’s feeding on?
I know I’m gonna see a ton of takes on this episode being like “this is why I’m childfree” and, like yeah, I’m not planning on kids either but this story is such an extension of existing social structures that I hope we talk, at least a little, about the social narratives at work here about pregnancy, parenthood, and childcare.
#the magnus protocol#tmagp#tmagp spoilers#tmagp 24#celia ripley#tmagp chester#tmagp norris#tmagp episode breakdowns
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