#that the Final Secret boss of all Gods and deities

[emacrow]

Constantine is noping this situation, you can't make hi-..ah fucking damn it

John was already paled when Kronos got revived, but seeing the eyes scalding blinding Fear of God staring into your very soul and judgment every inch power that was in that godlinng babe was enough for him to started drinking his emergency booze.

He is not dealing with Greek Gods bullshits, especially if that what he puzzling in the pieces together Then Kronos's story was becoming twisted all together. Nope, he isn't. Batman can bribe him all he wants. He is fucking leaving now!!

Fucking with THAT right there especially with the contract he still owed Kronos for, he rather suffered the complete obliteration of his soul being torn to shreds once he dies then have that god find him. He is escaping of here before She even noticed that he is Here with her ol time relic still in his pocket.

Before he can even get one step in the portal ready, he already felt his chest tightening as if his entire chest was being squeezed like a kid's teething toy.

Fucking dammit, he should've left right when Kronos was still having that psychic backlash, he knew he should've trusted his gut, fucking time Goddess and her all knowing of when and where.

Part 6 << >> Offical Quiz that Decision the Fate of this continuing fic >>> Fic Released

[theauthorandtheartist]

I had a dream the other night that i can't stop thinking about, where a new LOZ game was released in a similar vein to TOTK, except instead of collecting sages like in that game, there was a series of dungeons/temples that were directly tied to other LOZ games, and at the end, you gained the ability to summon the avatar/ghost of the hero from said game -like the TOTK sages- to help on your quest (and get a fun power up). All of the links would have stilted dialogue with you at first, but as the game goes on they get more friendly and at the end of the game theres a cutscene where they all "move on" and it's super emotional cuz by this point they're all brothers (player-link actually emotes during this cutscene, the only time he does so, for an extra punch in the gut). I don't remember all of the details, but what I do remember was:

A Palace of the Four Sword dungeon where you gained the Link(s) from FSA. FSA Link was the simplest in terms of abilities, the avatar would split into 4 and distract enemies/fight alongside you. Pretty sure this was the first one/tutorial temple. Later on this link gives you a sidequest after which you gain the Four Sword as a weapon (its the second strongest in the game behind the master sword).

A Tower of Winds dungeon where you got Minish Cap Link to tag along. He allows you to shrink for short periods of time to get through locked doors/escape danger. Don't remember much about this dungeon except that there's a timer to get through it before yiu have to start over.

Forest temple/great deku tree/kokiri forest type place where Oot/MM link joins up with you. He allows you to rewind time for a little bit (basically the recall ability but on everything including you). Later on He gives a sidequest that results in obtaining the Fierce Deity Mask (best armor in the game).

Arbiter grounds dungeon where you get TP link. He's basically a glorified horse; you ride him around.

Tower of the Gods dungeon where you get WW/PH Link to tag along. He's like Revali's Gale and Tulin's gust in one.

The dungeon to get the Master Sword is like the Skyview Temple, and to be allowed to draw it you must beat SS Link as the final boss of the temple, After which he joins you on your quest. He allows you to do skyward strikes with any one handed weapon.

A secret, optional dungeon that you only unlock by falling asleep on this random island. It's kohohlit. The only avatars/ghosts that you can access here are OoT/MM Link and WW/PH Link (because PH was a dream and MM was an alternate reality). By the end, You get Alttp/albw/LA link who can put enemies to sleep for a time. Later he gives you a sidequest to get ravio's bracelet, which opens up a few easter eggs and secret loot.

Other links/games were included as easter eggs but they don't stick around. BOTW/TOTK Link is a recurring ghostly NPC who you can find in all the weirdest places, offering seemingly nonsensical trades that change every time you see him (10 frogs for 13 bombs, a ruby for an apple pie, 35 monster parts for a single ancient arrow, etc). There's a few places around hyrule where you see two-bit LOZ1/LOZ2 Link just vibing. ST Link takes the place of Purah or Robbie as the eccentric scientist/engineer who will upgrade your stuff if you bring him materials, and he can also upgrade your ghost-Link-friend's abilities as well since he's -y'know- Hero of Spirits.

There's murals in the castle from Cadence of Hyrule, and there's "ancient history books" about HW and AoC. Throughout Hyrule you'll meet various NPCs claiming to be from different countries here to see "the birthplace of the hero of Holodrum/Labrynnia/Calatia."

Various Zelda's would show up too. You get a sidequest where you have to sneak aboard a ghost pirate ship. It's Tetra's. There's a mysterious sheikah warrior who repeatedly accosts you on your travels to loredump and test if you're ready to fight the big bad. She only ever brings you down to half heart, at which point she makes a disappponted comment and leaves. you aren't able to beat her until near endgame, at which point she reveals herself as sheik, has a brief conversation with Oot/MM Link, gives you some cryptic foreshadowing advice and a few fairies, and dips. BOTW/TOTK zelda is similar to her link since she can be found all over the place, but she deals exclusively in ancient materials and dragon parts. TP Zelda gives lore/exposition when you finally make it to the castle, right before the big bad fight.

Big bad is an amalgamation of all ganons/ganondorfs/big bads across the timelines. He telegraphs attacks via shifting forms to look like various bad guys (forms tentacles like bellum and Majora (at the same time) before slam attack, gets blue pig face before charge attack, long purple vaati hair and bat wings before AOE gust attack, scales up his arm and X on face before big AOE lightning blast, and big fuck-all sword and gerudo features before slashing. 2nd phase has it split into like 5 separate beings to fight you and all your friends at once (each one has different features: one is similar to bellum/majora, one is more beast-ganon, one more demise, one Vaati-esque one, and one Ganondorf-like one). The music is harsh and disjointed, cobbled together from many other games, and the noises that the beast makes are screeching and painful.

By the end of the game, there's a big deal made by SS link that you are the final Link in the cycle, that it's over, that you finished what he couldn't. There's a sense of hope, but also of sorrow, since all your new friends are leaving now. They're ghosts, they're dead, they've done their duty and it's time for them to rest. Before they go, though, each one gives you one last gift (the ability they've been helping you with this whole time) and one last sidequest (one for each of them) for you to accomplish: find their treasures, keep them safe.

Post game is you running around without the ghosts (FSA Link's ability duplicates you now, giving you 3 buddies to fight with, but they can't give dialogue and they last like 30 seconds so it's not the samel), doing mini-dungeons and fetch-quests in order to obtain major key items (all old and unusable anymore) from the Links' adventures, (the Beetle, goddess harp, spinner, shards of the fused shadow, deku/goron/Zora masks, gnat hat, various kinstones, pictobox, deku leaf, LA instruments, Ocarina of Time, wind waker, etc) and some from games not mentioned previously or not from your gaggle of links, (Harp of ages, rod of seasons, silver arrows, a doppel, ST panpipes, a revival doll, Cadence of Hyrule Lute, HW blue Scarf, old and broken Terrako, champion's tunic, BOTW champion's picture, trirod, etc). In post-game, there are new NPCs to replace the links/zeldas that used to fill those niches, but it's not the same. They're gone. It's a bittersweet feeling.

After you finish all the post game and get all the treasures (basically 100%ing the game), you get an achievement called "archive of the ages" and a special cutscene where Player Link sets the Master sword down on the side of his bed, looks out the window of his house at the brilliantly setting sun, smiles, and falls asleep. You may no longer play on that save file anymore. The adventure is over.

Basically I dreamt up a game that was a love letter to the entire series, and I'm sad it was just a dream. Logically i know this will never happen because that would mean tying up LOZ and it's too much of a cash cow for Nintendo to ever stop making, but it was a wonderful dream to have for a little while.

[melancholicwriteaholic]

Legend of Welp! #321

Soldier: Link has run out of quests to do!

Commander: Link has run out of quests to do!?

Soldier: I’m afraid so, sir. He finally won all of the carnival games, found the last sea shell, and made everyone in Hyrule happy and financially stable!

Commander: This isn’t good. Well, I mean it’s wonderful, but also it isn’t GOOD!

Noble: I don’t understand what’s the matter. Link is one of Hyrule’s most vigilant defenders and a helper of the needy. If he has finished everything he wants to do, doesn’t that mean Hyrule is at its best condition?

Commander: It’s terrible, sir. Link is Hyrule’s greatest hero when there is injustice to fight and prizes to be won. But in times of peace... well... take a look for yourself.

The commander points out thewindow to where Link stands in a field. The usually bright young boy has an aura of menace about him.

Link: My time as Hyrule’s saviour has come and gone. From now on the hero is no more! I am now Link, the ultimate MENACE OF SOCIETY! I vow in these peaceful times to spare nobody my mischief!

He dawns a kitton mask and gives an evil laugh.

Link: NO ONE SHALL BE SPARED! I WILL BREAK INTO HOMES AT NIGHT AND STEAL CHEESE! I WILL BOTHER PETS AND FARM ANIMALS! I WILL SMASH VASES IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT WHEN EVERYONE WANTS TO SLEEP! MWA HA HA HA HA!

The soldier and commander shake their heads. The noble swallows nervously.

Noble: Well, that certainly seems... pretty bothersome. But Link does generally listen to the counsel of his friends. Maybe if they talk him out of this he will listen?

Commander: Look again.

Link is surrounded by his friends from all over Hyrule. They clap and cheer at his speech and promises of mayhem.

Navi: There are PLENTY of pots to destroy in castle town!

Fi: Use me to search for treasure while you raid, master.

Darunia: Remember to use BOMB FLOWERS if you need an extra kick to get rid of obstacles that get in your way!

Malon: Make sure Epona gets lots of exercise! Use her to leap over fences!

Anju: If you find any cuckoos while breaking and entering bring them to me and I will give you a reward!

Great Fairy: And come to me if you’re ever in danger of facing consequences for your actions. I will heal you up.

The noble shakes his head

Noble: Well, he’s totally loyal to Her Majesty and her family. Perhaps they will stop him?

Commander: Look again.

The hero is approached by the kings and princesses of Hyrule.

Zelda: Link, you goof. You can’t cause mayhem all over Hyrule without my permission. Here! A signed letter giving you permission to enter any region with the royal seal of approval!

Ruto: And my permission to enter the body of Jabu Jabu, my people’s sacred deity, anytime you want if you want to search for treasure in there.

Riju: This royal helm, which is an important tool of my people, is yours to wear as well. As well as this gown for if you want to break the law of my land and come into my royal home!

King Bosphoramus Rhoam Hyrule: Remember to keep yourself warm with fires at night. Here’s my torch, axe, and some flint to get yourself started.

King Daphnes Nohansen Hyrule: And keep in touch with this stone on your travels, Link, just in case you need a royal pardoning.

King Harkinian: And don’t forget your SMART SWORD!

The soldier and commander sigh.

Noble: Oh. We are doomed.

*** *** ***

There’s a meme in The Legend of Zelda fandom that Link is a horrible mischievous gremlin child, and that is true. But I NEED everyone to undestand that his horribleness is ENCOURAGED. His friends, bosses, and the Gods themselves WANT HIM TO BE A HORRIBLE GREMLIN CHILD.

They sell him bombs at an affordable price. They meet up with him in secret places that require him to break into the key political building of their Kingdom (A hanging offence if I’ve ever heard of one). They are IN ON THE ACTION of his quests.

[duhragonball]

Super Dragon Ball Heroes 7-12

These two might be my favorite characters in this whole thing.

This is the “Universal Conflict” arc of SDBH, although as far as I’m concerned, this is just a continuation of the Prison Planet arc we were in before.  I mean, the Prison Planet exploded, but Fu and Cumber are still in play, and nothing really got settled, so this just proves that calling it “The Prison Planet Arc” was a bad idea. 

At the end of Episode 6, Universe 6 was under attack, so Vegeta and Future Trunks headed there to assist.  Episode 7 opens with Hit, Caulifla and Kale fighting aliens on some unidentified planet.  Cabba’s also involved, but he’s been taken out of the fight, I guess. 

These two bad guys are basically eating Universe 6′s lunch.  I mean, Hit’s a pretty big deal, and they’re taking turns fighting him for their own amusement.

Here’s Kale doing the Tails-gets-trolled face.

Then Vegeta and Trunks arrive, and this is presented like some game-changing moment, even though Hit has defeated Vegeta in his Super Saiyan Blue form before.  So I’m not sure why Vanilla Super Saiyan Vegeta and Trunks is supposed to matter.

From his secret base, the bad guys’ leader watches this development and seems to approve.  Also Zamasu is with him, and apparently taking orders from the guy.  The boss says that he has to wait to resume his Zero Mortals Plan until after Grand Zeno has been defeated.  Okay...

Back at the fight, the two aliens suddenly turn into clouds of sparkles and enter the bodies of Caulifla and Kale, possessing them.  That’s right, these two are Tuffle Machine Mutants like Baby from Dragon Ball GT.  Of course, no one in this show is aware of the events of Dragon Ball GT, so the two Tuffles, Kamin (the girl) and Oren (the boy) have to explain what they are. 

For some reason, I thought these two were from Universe 6, which may be true, but this episode doesn’t confirm it.  I mean, we’re in U6 right now, but that doesn’t mean these two couldn’t have come from one of the others.  Anyway, I know they’re not from U7, since those Tuffles were wiped out by the Saiyans.  Wherever Kamin and Oren are from, they were created by Tuffle technology to be the perfect weapons, but then the Tuffles began to fear them, and tried to destroy them.  I’m pretty sure Kamin and Oren then wiped out the Tuffles in turn, so we can think of them as something like a Tuffle version of 17 and 18. 

Anyway, I like these two because they take the stuff that made Baby interesting and carry it forward, without a lot of the dumb stuff that GT saddled Baby with.  And these two characters actually get a minute to tell their origin and share their motivation, which is more than most characters get in SDBH. 

So now Vegeta and Co. have to free the gals, which turns out to be pretty quick and clever.  Trunks and Hit attack them and get them in holds, and then Vegeta launches a Final Flash at them.  Kamin and Oren panic and abandon their hosts, and I guess Vegeta’s shot misses?  Or Trunks and Hit dodge in time?  It’s not really clear.

Then the gang’s leader shows up and uses a gravity technique to force all the good guys to the ground.  He introduces himself as Hearts, and says he’ll defeat Grand Zeno, and eliminate all the other deities as well. 

Let’s just get this out of the way, Hearts is voiced by Takehito Koyasu, who plays Dio in the Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure anime.  It’s good casting, but it’s also just Koyasu doing his Dio voice on a different character, which is pretty distracting if you’ve watched JJBA like I have.  Also, his goggles and the lines on his face keep reminding me of Agent X, Marvel Comics’ short-lived Deadpool spin-off character.

Hearts threatens to use the defeated heroes’ energy to fuel the “Universe Seed” which is the thing he plans to use to defeat the gods, but then Kamin and Oren protest, saying they want to toy with these guys some more.  Hearts agrees to let them have their way, which seems kind of stupid.  I mean, does he want to charge up this Universe Seed or not?

Hearts asks Zamasu to come with them as they withdraw to some other Universe to absorb their energy for a while, and Zamasu gets all indignant about a mortal giving him orders.  Okay, but how did these guys get together in the first place?   That’s what I want to know.

Hearts reads Hit’s mind and discovers that Hit considers Jiren of Universe 11 to be the strongest mortal, so they go to U11 to check him out.  And this leads to Cumber vs. Jiren, because Cumber is part of Hearts’ team too, remember?  Goku defeated Cumber on the Prison Planet, and then Hearts’ team showed up and took Cumber before it exploded.  Say, whatever happened to Goku, anyway?

For some reason, he’s at Grand Zeno’s palace, and the Grand Minister is... doing something with him.  My guess is that he trained Goku to fight Hearts, because he went to the trouble of dressing Goku up in the same clothes he wears, but this is never actually stated. 

Meanwhile, Vegeta and Trunks follow the bad guys to Universe 11 (how?), and Vegeta gets possessed by Kamin.  This time, Kamin transforms Vegeta’s body more than he did Caulifla’s.  I get that this is their special power, but to have them use it again so soon after the last time is kind of weak. 

So while Trunks has to fight his possessed dad, Jiren and Cumber have a hoss battle.  Big meaty men slappin’ meat!

Then Hearts tells Cumber to go to Universe 3 for some reason.  Cumber doesn’t like that but he still plays along.  So was he on Hearts’ team before Fu captured him, or did Hearts convince him to join the team after he rescued him?

So this leads to Zamasu fighting Jiren which is... pretty fun actually.  Jiren just clobbers the shit out of the guy, but none of it works because Zamasu is indestructible. 

And Kamin Vegeta beats up Trunks, who is basically useless in this show.  Then, suddenly, the Grand Minister brings Goku to the battlefield.

This is so fucking stupid.  The Grand Minister actually pulls off that Dorito uniform really well.  He just makes it work, I don’t know how.  But when you have a guy standing next to him in the exact same outfit, they both look like idiots.  Fortunately, the Grand Minister leaves right away, allowing Goku to handle things as he sees fit.

So Goku goes Ultra Instinct and cleans house, and he hits Kami Vegeta so hard that Kami gets knocked clean out of Vegeta’s body.  Cool! 

Kamin and Oren can’t stop Goku, so they join together to become Kamioren.  Trunks is shocked that they can do this, as if he hasn’t already seen several characters combine like this before.

But Kamioren can’t stop Goku either, so Hearts brings in another teammate, Lagss.  Lagss has a technique where she shoots broken glass as Goku, and it’s very effective, even though it never actually cuts him.  I guess it’s like magic glass that only inflicts pain without injury?

So Vegeta goes after Kamioren instead, since he wants revenge for how they made a fool of him earlier.  He uses his Super Saiyan Blue 2 Royal Evolution (Evolved) ~Sign~ Level B, and hits Kamioren so hard they separate. 

Then Hearts decides to step in and fight Goku, since he’s intrigued by Goku’s UI power.  He can tell that it isn’t complete, so he plans to force Goku to improve his mastery of UI, then defeat him. 

That all sounds very high and mighty, but all Hearts actually does is that same cheap gravity field thing he did before.  As Goku struggles, the Supreme Kai of U7 shows up and they teleport back home.

Hearts then decides that Universe 7 should be their next target, but they have to go pick up Cumber from Universe 3, I guess.  Also, they put Jiren in a box.  I dunno what for.

Meanwhile, Fu is watching all of this from some other laboratory he has.  He seems very pleased with everything that’s been happening, as if he and Hearts are on the same side.  I mean, he seemed to anticipate Hearts’ arrival into the story, so maybe they’re in cahoots, or he’s just letting Hearts do his thing because they happen to share a similar goal. 

In Universe 7, Goku has assembled a posse to defend it from Hearts’ crew.  I’m not sure why he picked Piccolo and 17 but didn’t invite Gohan or 18 to this party, or any of the other Z fighters.  Mostly, I’m just grateful that this show skipped the obligatory “Buu would help but he’s asleep” scene.

Here’s Oren doing some liquid metal stuff.  I like Oren a lot. 

Meanwhile, I think Cumber is still in Universe 3?  I’m not sure, but he runs into a new foe arranged by Fu.   It’s... Cooler.  Again.  Well, this time Fu turned him into Meta Cooler, so he’s stronger this way!  Wait, Cooler hated Fu when they last met, and now they’re on the same side?

Then Meta Cooler transforms, becoming Golden.  He dubs this form-- you might want to sit down for this-- Golden Metal Cooler.  Shocking.

Cooler actually gets the upper hand in their fight, and he powers up a big finishing attack, but then the left side of his head starts to break down, so he has to withdraw. 

Cumber calls him a coward, but he passes out from Cooler’s parting attack, so I guess this is a draw.  Which... is pretty good for Cooler, except I have no idea why these two were fighting.  How did Cooler turn into a machine?  You’d think that Fu arranged it, except he says Cooler was transformed by the Big Gete Star, just like in Movie 6, where Metal Cooler was first introduced.  But it’s the same Cooler we met in this series, right? 

I mean, was Cooler trying to stop Cumber or help Fu, or both, or neither?  Was he just out to prove he could stand up to Cumber?  Seriously, why is Cooler even in this thing?  I think SDBH might be the third best Cooler story by default, but it makes no sense.

Back on Earth, Hearts does the same cheap gravity thing he always uses. 

Then he powers up, and says the Universe Seed is nearly ready.  I don’t know if one has something to do with the other, or if it’s just a coincidence.  Anyway, Goku will have to fight him, but we’ll cover that next time.

[dyzzythedemon]

My thoughts so far on Octopath Traveler 2, a game I've been binging for 3 days straight:

Overall, it's an improvement in every way.

In the original's story(not that I'm done with all the stories in the sequel yet,) there wasn't really anything tying the characters together. They all had separate paths, and the "travel banter" was laughable at best. That stays true in this game, apart from the addition of Side Quests, where two of the 8 will pair for a sort of mini-joint story, and though there are only four thus far, I really wish there were more. I like seeing our protags interact.

The battle mechanics are improved as well, adding a new fun gauge for super moves, and individual weapon sprites, which as McBeanss pointed out, is very well done. I do feel the difficulty spike is exhausting once you get to the level 45-55 range, as nearly everything will OHKO you immediately if you're not careful. For this reason I have Throne AND Ochette(multiclassed into thief) in my party, and I suggest others do the same.

As for jobs, it's strange to me that shrines no longer give you jobs, as now you'll have to hunt NPCs down for "Job Lisences", but it's not too big an issue for me. I like that there are new secret jobs, though am a bit confused as to why they're so hidden. The inventor in particular is easy to find, hard to actually get skills for, as it requires you to search for random items in the world to progress the class. Haven't gotten any others yet.

This game thrives in it's new,(better, in my opinion,) characters, it's soundtrack, and it's ability to show real growth since OT1. I sincerely hope we get a third entry in this franchise, and I hope beyond all hope for 3 that they will WEAVE PEOPLE'S STORIES INTO EACH OTHER. I cannot stress enough how they can come up with really great individual character arcs, but all the side convos amount to is "can I touch your tail."

As for the characters themselves, I started with Ochette and thank god. she doesn't talk like jar jar binks. I love her sincerely, massive improvement for the Hunter rep. I like that you gain monsters along her route that don't leave you, as well. Temenos has to be my favorite, given that he's a WELL-WRITTEN CLERIC??? He's snarky. He's a bastard. He's hyperintelligent. He can go into the Sacred Flame Shadow Realm and Investigate your ass without even going into the building. He's written like a danganronpa trickster wasn't stuck in a franchise written by Kodaka and GOD it shows. Can't gush enough about Temenos.

For the other two whose stories I've... actually played(I'm playing this in halves.), Throne's story was a TRIP, and legit as uncomfortable as I think it was meant to be, and I haven't finished Osvald's yet, but I've done chapter 4 and it's shaping up to be something truly terrifying in the final entry.

I like Partitio, but I wish the acquisition of a ship wasn't A. locked behind a paywall and B. Locked behind him. As for the guy himself, he's great! has to be one of my favorite voices so far(except temenos, obviously.). Hikari is shaping up to have HUGE ramifications later down the line, which I'm excited for. Agnea... I'm gonna be real, she's adorable, but I don't really see what she adds? I'm sure hers will be the spiritual successor to Tressa OT1's route; sweet as sugar and spice and... pretty low on stakes, but who knows! they could easily subvert my expectaions. And as for Cassti, she's gay! I hope she finds her girlfriend soon, and I like that you can find her in another town simply labeled "Apothecary" in Partitio's route. really helps make the game feel like home.

But yeah, this game has been quite a ride. Can't wait to see how it ends! A few stories seem to be lining up lore-wise, like how Temenos' deity and the inciting force behind Ochette's story is the same; a large blue flame. I'm crossing my fingers for a big final boss including everyone once all 8 stories have been completed, but I'm not holding my breath, seeing as how the octopath devs don't really want to write ONE story, as opposed to eight(or more, if you count side missions.) I respect the style but the characters are too good not to use together. Solid 9/10 game for me so far. Idk WHAT'S up with that boy in Gravell though.

[dailycharacteroption]

Deity Drop 4: Hadregash

You’ve got to appreciate the loyalty of evil minions… Wait, no, hold on. What’s the opposite of loyalty? Disloyalty? Sounds fake.

In any case, we’re covering the first of the four goblin hero-gods today, Hadregash!

Not truly gods, but quasi-divine barghests of immense power, these beings were once servants of Asmodeus until the demon goddess Lamashtu discovered them on one of her many raids of Hell and took a liking to them, adopting them as her “children” and setting them loose on the material plane. (Legends differ here, with goblins claiming that Lamashtu gave birth to them)

Happy to have a master that would let them indulge in their dark urges, these barghests eagerly accepted the goddess as their patron, and were delighted when they discovered that their otherworldly nature had curious effects on blood, namely causing the first goblinoids to arise from the spilled blood of the mortals they hunted, until finally Lamashtu reined in these four and returned to the Abyss with them.

Hadregash is the greatest among these four, the Greatest Supreme Chieftain Boss (or just Supreme Chieftain to hobgoblins), a fact that his three kin grew jealous of. At one point, they conspired to destroy him by tempting him with the secret of Zarongel’s burning hide, but their ambush was thwarted by Hadregash’s might, and he cowed them, letting them continue to roam free knowing that they had been put in their place.

However, in their battle, Hadregash had been wounded, a fact he hid from them, though his blood transformed the worms is dripped onto into the first goblin snakes.

In practice, Hadregash is the demigod of goblin supremacy, slavery, and territory, and it is he who loves the goblinoid children they created the most, wishing to see them rise to mastery of all life on Golarion (though still under him, of course). To that end, hobgoblins are his favorite, given their knack for organization and the hierarchy that he delights in.

Hadregash typically takes his natural form as a barghest, whether it be the wolf-like horror or the more hobgoblin-like fiend with the distinct, bat-like nose. However, hobgoblins usually depict him as one of their kind, dressed in black armor and wielding his favored weapon, a flail, his other hand grasping the chain of a human or elven slave.

Like all the Goblin Hero-Gods, Hadregash dwells in the abyssal realm of Basalfeyst, which Lamashtu ripped out of Hell and dragged to the Abyss to be a sub-realm of her own domain. While the realm features many biomes and evidence of blended architecture of both Hellish, Abyssal, and Goblin origins, Hadregash’s personal territory is called Fort Slaughter, where he musters his armies and makes plans of conquest.

Naturally, the Supreme Chieftain is worshipped primarily by (and only answers the prayers of) goblinoids, particularly hobgoblins, who view him as the paragon of their traditional ideals. Goblins typically worship him as a secondary figure to Lamashtu, while bugbears are too interested in independence and their own games of predation to pay him much mind. Needless to say, his doctrine of conquest, goblin superiority, and the enslavement and death of all other sapient beings means his faithful are among the worst of the worst among the parts of goblinkind that have not abandoned their sinister origins.

On that note, it’s worth pointing out that many core tenants of goblin culture, such as hobgoblin distrust of arcane magic (i.e., the magic of their enemies which does not come from the divine power of the Hero-Gods), the goblin fear of domesticated animals and of writing, and so on seem to be the sort of things a faith would engineer to keep the goblinoids under the thumb of their gods and their priests, never questioning a better way of living, which is appropriate for a group of evil gods.

Naturally, as the leader of the barghest demideities, he commands their obedience and loyalty, though obviously he rules them through fear and power, rather than true camaraderie, though Venkelvore is specifically his consort. He is grateful to Lamashtu for the power and freedom she granted him despite his lawful attitude clashing with her chaotic nature, though he remains envious of Zarongel’s burning hide, a gift from the Mother of Monsters. In the hobgoblin nation of Kaoling, his priests squabble and disagree with the battle strategies of the devotees of General Susumu. Meanwhile, Asmodeus considers Hadregash to be too bloodthirsty to make a proper tyrant (perhaps part of the reason he and his kin were on such a tight leash before Lamashtu liberated them). Needless to say, Hadregash is the enemy of all goodly deities, especially those favored by humans and elves.

Hadregash counts many barghests, fiendish goblins, and the like as his servants, as well as countless demons, though he keeps a painfully tight rein on them, as well as devils who are willing to overlook Hadregash’s company to help further his conquests.

As a slaver-god, the Supreme Chieftain’s domains include Evil, Law, Strength, and War, with the subdomains of Blood, Devil (by way of either evil or law), Ferocity, and Slavery, all reflecting his desire for new conquests and new slaves.

Sadly the Hero-gods have not received deity stats yet in Second Edition, but perhaps in the future they shall.

He does, however, have full obedience rules for the evangelist, exalted, and sentinel paths and prestige classes. The basic ritual, extolling the virtues of goblinkind, bolsters their own ability to strike fear while making it harder for their own courage to be shaken.

Evangelists Invoke a combination of his aspect as a goblin supremacist and slaver, gaining spells to strike fear into and punish foes, as well as the ability to speak to allies and inspire them to better combat proficiency, especially when fighting dirty. Finally, they reflect Hadregash’s story as progenitor of goblin snakes by magically turning their own spilled blood into masses of venomous serpents.

Meanwhile, the exalted focus on the slavery aspect, commanding foes, and preventing their escape even by dimensional means. They also gain the ability to conjure fetters on foes with a touch, and bolster their ability to charm and compel others with their magic.

Finally, sentinels focus mostly on the warfare aspect, being able to shake the nearby earth as well as bolster the strength and battle-rage of themselves or allies. Later on, they can turn into a wolf like the barghests that Hadregash rules over, and later still, they can instinctively gain mastery over a new combat technique to fit the situation.

Hadregash hasn’t been mentioned in Starfinder yet, but given that hobgoblins are still a thing in Starfinder, it can be assumed that they still adhere to many of his teachings if not worship him directly, though they have long abandoned their taboos against magic.

 We’ve covered an all-too-familiar form of evil today, but tomorrow, we’ll cover something less evil and more unknowable, but no less dangerous.

[dragmiire]

thoughts on the big ganondorf fight(s)! i totally forgot to post them, but i got THOUGHTS INDEED.

okay first off, RLY wish we had a cooler arena for the humanoid fights. Just A Dark Room(TM) felt boring and dull. it would've been neater to slowly walk into deeper and deeper darkness, until finding a light root. then when you light it up, you're face-to-face with The Horrors(TM) (like idk a bunch of gibdo corpses, creepy gloom, whatever) and ganondorf awaiting you. and then you gotta fight in the creepy depths arena lit only by the light root with all the outside edges of the arena pitch-dark and very spooky scary. just. just anything, pls.

MY MAN CAN FLURRY RUSH OUT OF MY FLURRY RUSH?? WHAT. the way i actually screamed when i did a flurry rush (which i rarely do successfully i am SO bad at timing) and he flurry rushed out of it and beat the shit out of me. or when i'd do a flurry rush and he'd just do a sick backflip. what the fuck. why is he so AGILE.

again, HOW IS HE SO AGILE?? he is HUGE and was doing backflips and front flips and flying through the fucking air PRE-DEMON KING MAGIC FORM. if i didn't have to do the stupid army bit every time id love to just go back to watch him do his insane acrobatics.

to beat him i literally had to shove him into a corner against the wall so he'd stop back-flipping away from me. literally every time i would try to hit him he'd slow-motion backflip away and i was going to lose if i did not fudge it a little.

apparently when a dragon dies it causes a NUCLEAR EXPLOSION? PARDON?

also why is it HIS secret stone ends back up on his forehead, but zelda's remains in her tummy?? both of them ate their stones, it made zero sense.

god his demon king form is SO sexy.

lowkey him eating the secret stone, just the intensity of how he seemed to shove it down his own throat? also kinda sexy im weird im sorry.

it took me a total of three hours-ish to beat him, including my first try. as cited to blue, i needed the following to beat him: fierce deity armor (all save for the headpiece at 3 star, headpiece at 2 star), gloom-resistant food, defense-up food, LOTS of gloom removal food, LOTS of heart-up food, and so many prayers.

OH AND I FORGOT, THE FACT HE CAN PERMANENTLY REMOVE YOUR HEARTS?? I WAS SCREAMING?? BRO WHAT THE FUCK??? if i didn't have all that fucking extra heart food he'd have KILLED ME. literally was about to go into a rage if i lost after struggling SO hard.

the dragon fight was super fun and i found it very rewarding, personally, after getting my ass beaten into a blood stain. i honestly don't mind a super easy final fight after a really hard fight, it feels like a lil 'u did it!' final lap.

all in all, i was caught between being SUPER pleased at how hard he was and how they made him rightfully super tough, and also dying because PLEASE nintendo i JUST want to see the last few cutscenes my GOD.

not ganondorf related, but i did like how the game ends with link finally being able to grab zelda, and it was nice to yknow, do it urself. i almost wanted to see what happens if u let zelda go splat but i didnt wanna replay the boss fights if it restarted u. STILL do not like everybody swearing fealty, i didn't like it with the og sages and rauru, ESPECIALLY did not vibe with it and zelda.

idk how to exactly put it into words, it just puts everyone on a subservient level to her when they rly should be kicking the outdated monarchy system to the curb and functioning as equals each trying to boost up their individual societies and hyrule as a whole. but it was rly funny to see link wearing his usual resting bitch face while everyone else is fumbling thru their vow.

[sailoryooons]

Welcome back to Hali's Thirsty Thursday where I thirst over fics that have made me absolutely insane. On this week's episode, I am violently in love with Jo's writing once again but this one made me truly, inherently, wholly, entirely, largely a feral child who does not know how to behave because the conclusion of this series was just as powerful, wonderful and moving as the beginning. I have loved every single second of this series and while I'm sad to see it end, I am so happy I got to read this and I have absolutely fallen in love with Kim Seokjin all over again just because of the way Jo writes him.

Spoilers below the cut

Seokjin, secret genius lmfao your wit and humor never fails to make me cackle. Honestly, it lends sooo much to your writing when you’re quick on the joke and sharp and ugh I love your writing Jo. This is just an example of that, honestly.

I FUCKING KNEW THAT MINJI WAS GONNA KNOW THEY WERE GAGA IN LOVE. She is 1) too smart to not have noticed that 2) they are both too in love and too stupid for one another for anyone to not notice. I love the idea of them thinking they’re like subtle and hiding it, when in fact, they have been shining the bat signal in the sky for YEARS and only they didn’t know it. GOD I fuck so hard with this fucking couple and this trope and this style. GOD DAMMIT I LOVE THEM.

The idea of Seokjin breaking rules for reader and Minji and Jungkook noticing for whatever reason has sort of brought tears to my eyes because I’m just picturing this older brother who has a crush on his kid sister’s best friend and he just… gently makes room in his life for her and takes it easy on her and is soft for her and god dammit.

My goal is to find a way to be with you. I’m going to go back and do whatever I can’t to make that happen. Oh fuck you Jo. My emotions are real and they have feelings and you can’t PUNCH them like this. It is not FAIR.. I am down so bad for this Jin it is lowkey embarrassing.

HE SAID MY FAVORITE GIRL CALL 911 GET THE MEDIC GET AN AMBULANCE OVER HERE.

Oh god. Oooooooohhh god. I’m not prepared for this. I don’t read your warnings because I like to plunge into battle like a Rider of Rohan and I just threw myself into this and are you fucking telling me that they’re about to have phone sex and I’m going to read this while slightly tipsy from a bubbly wine and I’m going to pass out because your smut is 10000000000000000 Based God Deity Final Boss Eternal Sailor Moon Level.

GOD OH GOD OH GOD THIS IS TOO HOT MY EYES MY FACE I AM WARM AND I NEED TO DO A LAP AROUND MY HOUSE BECAUSE I’M BUZZING AND GIDDY OH GOODDDD

Okay I’m back from my nervous run through my apartment because that smut made me insane thank you I will send you a bill through blue cross blue shield thanks.

Honestly I have experienced the surprised boyfriend lets himself into the apartment in the middle of the night because he knows you need it and it makes me want to dunk my head in the algae-filled pond outside of my sliding glass door because I AM REALLY ALONE AND THIS REMINDED ME EVERYTHING ITS FINE I’M FINE I JUST WANT WHAT THEY HAVE ITS COOL. ITS COOL.

NOT THE PIZZA BAGELS LMAO SHE IS ME

DRSGDLKIFGNHDIUFGHZESD;FIUGHDERFLGIJUEH;FPJUWEBSG[OWUSJNWSJGBNWSJKFNWLJRKGBNDLOKJSH:EFJUSNEF;KJGSDNGKJSNEDFP;IABDENF[ORUIBEQRFIQUBERWLQEIJHFBNWRLSJHGBWSLR;FIJUBWEPFRIUQWHNR[OQIW3HR[‘QOEIRFBESRKJGNBDZLFJKGBNDZLJFGBNS;PEIFBJNSUEDF.JKSWHBFLSIRJGBNVLS.DERJKVGNESL.DFJUNWEIUFRBQA{WEDUBQAW{RJUWBEAFGKEJDRBGSKJFBPSIDUGVB{SOUGBVSIUJNFGLSREHPWOI3H4R[wqoeu3rhwisjrgndlzkfjgnvzdlijgubnzpds;ifugvbzndsfpirugthrwo4iuyqw30r9qhroqiwrnqiow3h8rg98w3uryw[o9ghdkfljgbnS:AZWIKjhfnW*iy3rt059w3yrtu[hwoa9ghtyw[408ihtgnws:ROKGnZ”:osfinh’[zswpoegh9t{QW()E3u7509w385[=w2039ta3hw4t089hw4yETOWihntfg;oeignszo;gkijsdeprg0weritg]w_e0ti8[]q039R4UI8=3q02985u73807W9UTGHAPNGS;DFJKNFG’APOEFJAQ[R9FJU09098ur79835[JPOEIRHepowritghuneapwo9u48thy5wu4htgerdiujnvpe;rgjantiw]et0w93i4r0w3984239573w49uihtne;dgjknd;zfbgjnokirjeh[09w4u5r50w4389tuywrhgoa

That concludes my response to him proposing.

Live reaction of me telling M how I fucking handled the ending of this fic. Jo this was so fucking good. So good I cannot really put into words how much I loved this story. From start to finish, I loved every single moment of their journey and this made me fall in love with Seokjin all over again. The way that you write him feels so authentic and magical and the way that throughout the story, both of these characters embraced how difficult things were to finish the end strong and in love and so faithful to their commitment to one another I want to shave my head and move to another country and think about this fic for 700 years.

Anyway I’m gonna go walk around my apartment again and think about this.

4. Perilune || KSJ

(banner by @itaeewon)

Title: Amalthea (Masterpost) - Part 4: Perilune

Rating: NSFW - minors go away i mean it Genre: best friend's older brother!au, angst smut fluff trifecta Pairing: Seokjin x female reader Beta team: @yoongiphoria, @here2bbtstrash, @kookstempo

Summary: You can count on two things in life. One: that your lifelong best friend Minji will always be there for you, in your corner, your brightest star. Two: that you'll never be free from her older brother Seokjin's orbit - the gravitational pull is just too strong.

Warnings: language, confessions, drinking, angst, facetime sex lol bye, vibrator use (f), dirty talk, kissing, lightly dom!jin, fingering, reader takes it from behind, penetrative sex (protection not mentioned either way), multiple orgasms (f. receiving), sweet aftercare

WC: 9k

Part 4: Perilune

Perilune: (noun)  the point of an elliptical lunar orbit where the satellite and the Moon are the closest

“What… is going on here?” Minji asks, eyes wide, voice trembling. 

Seokjin, secret genius, reaches out an arm to welcome her into the hug. “Y/N is upset,” he says easily, like this is a perfectly natural thing. “Come help.”

Minji’s eyes narrow, but she shuffles into the hug, wrapping one arm around each of you. “But,” she ventures after a minute, “why are you upset?”

You shake yourself free of the hug, wipe at your face roughly with both hands. You consider your options. You consider that Seokjin is willing to forgo the easy option, to wrestle with a tough reality for you. 

You owe him the same. 

“Because I don’t know what’s going to happen when he flies home again,” you say, as honest as you can be. “And I’m scared I’ll lose him again. And I hate that it isn’t easier.”

Minji looks back and forth between you silently. “Are you….?” she manages, and the question is pointed more at Seokjin than you, so he answers.

“We’re together,” he says simply. 

The shock flies to her face almost instantly, but all you feel is resignation. You’re already emotionally spent today; this might as well happen. 

“For how long?” she demands. “When did this start?”

You look at him. “Technically, like four days ago,” you answer, deciding to omit the New Year’s Eve debacle. For now. 

Her eyes narrow again. “You didn’t tell me.” The accusation falls at your feet, but you’re glad to accept it. 

“We were…” You trail off, meeting Seokjin’s eyes over her head. “We were trying to feel it out before we told anybody.”

“Hmph,” Minji sniffs, arms crossed, frown pronounced. “I’m not anybody. I’m your best friend.”

“I know,” you whisper. “But it felt… complicated. Considering. You don’t… hate this? Would you… are you okay with this?”

Minji huffs out a laugh, the same way Seokjin does when he thinks you’ve said something ridiculous. “Please,” she says, reaching back to elbow her brother in the ribs. “You two have been stupid for each other since we were teenagers. It’s honestly about time.”

It feels too good to be true. Seokjin smiles, grabbing her arm and wiggling it around affectionately. “Look how mature you are,” he coos. “Look at my mature, smart, lovely, wonderful sister.”

“Get off me,” she snaps, but there’s no bite behind it. “God, you two loons.” 

Later, when you’re back home, alone, trying to process everything that had happened, your phone lights up.

[11:57 PM] Minji 💗: OH MY GOD [11:57 PM] Minji 💗: THIS MEANS [11:57 PM] Minji 💗: YOU GOT THE GOOD DICK GLOW [11:57 PM] Minji 💗: FROM MY BROTHER???????///??????????? [11:57 PM] Minji 💗: I WILL THROW UP I WILL THROW UP RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[12:03 AM] Jin 😎: well now that the cat’s out of the bag… can i take you on a date before i go?

–

You tell Jin yes, but the next night isn’t spent with him. Instead, you show up after dinner to Minji’s apartment holding a fresh stalk of celery with a cheery bow slapped on the packaging. It’s stupid - ridiculous, really - but it’s a you and Minji thing dating all the way back to middle school and you think she’ll laugh.

You’re right; as soon as she processes the nonsense she’s looking at, she bursts into laughter. 

“Damn,” she cackles, backing up to let you into the apartment. “You must be feeling guilty. You bypassed show up with beer and went straight to celery!”

“Please accept this token of my deepest regrets and most sincere apologies,” you deadpan, pushing the stalks into her hands. Still laughing, she heads into her tiny kitchen to find a spot for them in the fridge. You perch on the arm of her couch, waiting for her to come talk to you.

She’s shaking her head at you when she returns, flopping on her couch and staring up at you. “You really didn’t need to,” she says, still smiling.

You twist your mouth at her. “I’ve known you for a long time,” you say gently. “I know it hurt your feelings that I didn’t tell you.”

She looks away and shrugs. For a second you think she’s going to lie, but then she juts out her jaw the way she does when she’s feeling defensive and she says, “I guess. I understood, though. I mean, I get why you didn’t.”

You run your toes along a pattern on her rug. “It’s weird because… I don’t know what’s okay to tell you?”

She cocks her head, not fully understanding. 

You try again. “I mean… I don’t want to not tell you stuff… but obviously there will be things that you don’t want to hear.”

“Ah,” she says, understanding, starting to nod. “Well… how about you give me some warning if anyone’s gonna get naked.”

“A safe word,” you suggest, only partly joking. 

“Pineapple,” she says sagely. “If there are naked parts, warn me with pineapple.” 

You laugh. “Okay,” you agree. “So should I? Tell you all of it?”

“Start at the beginning,” she directs. 

“The beginning.” You laugh again. The beginning was so long ago, before you even understood it. “Well, I think I’ve been in love with him since –”

“Since forever.”

“How come you knew, but he didn’t?” you ask, exasperated. Had everyone known but you and him? 

“Seokjin is an idiot,” she says simply, crossing her arms behind her head and getting comfortable. “Tell me the rest.”

You sink onto the couch opposite her, hugging your knees to your chest. “We had a lot of moments over the years,” you admit, “where I really… wondered. You know?”

“You were the only one wondering,” she says with a smile. “He’s always… made space for you, broke his own rules for you. Jungkook and I used to joke about it. He was always nicer to you than to us.”

You take this in, letting it soak into your heart like sunlight on your skin. You can feel the truth of it, can recognize that some part of you must have known this all along. 

“Yeah,” you say softly. “I guess it was like that, from the outside. I just… never knew what it meant. It was hard to see it clearly, from too close.”

Minji reaches over and squeezes your hand briefly, encouraging. “So, when did things start-start? Like really start?”

“Well,” you say tentatively, “two years ago, when you had that New Year’s Eve party? We, uh… shared a pineapple that night.”

Minji blinks at you, and you watch the moment it processes. Her eyes go wide, lips curling a bit in revulsion. “You what? How long ago? At my dad’s house?”

You cover your face with your hands, peeking at her between fingers. “Yeah.”

She exhales, nearly a whisper. “Two years ago?” she repeats, disbelieving. Now, a bit of hurt does creep into her voice as she adds, “That’s a long time to keep a secret.”

“I would have told you, I swear,” you hurry to say. “But he… kind of vanished the next day. Got on the plane and left and literally never talked to me about it again.”

“God, he’s an incurable fucking idiot,” Minji mutters, mostly to herself, it seems. 

“We worked it out,” you explain. “Recently. But yeah… I was embarrassed. And hurt, to be honest. I just didn’t want to have to admit any of it. I think saying it out loud to you - to anyone - would have killed me. I wanted to just… pretend it didn’t happen.”

She groans in mock agony, throwing her head back and flopping dramatically, like your own stupidity is causing her great pain. 

“I know,” you say, apologetic despite her dramatics. “The whole thing is ridiculous.”

“So?” she says, pulling herself together and scooting to sit back up. “What’s happening now? You’ve… had pineapples again, since he came home for Dad’s surgery?”

You feel your face burn like it’s caught fire before you can even answer and she starts shrieking and laughing, reaching to whack your legs with a throw pillow.

“Never mind!” she cries. “I got my answer, don’t tell me anything else! My actual question is - what happens next?”

You shrug, your stomach sinking. “I’m not sure,” you say. “He… told me he loves me?”

Minji squeals, the noise echoing to her lofted ceilings and back, her feet kicking.

“But,” you add, “he’s flying home in a few days…”

“What?” Minji squawks indignantly, sitting all the way up to face you. “So you’ll just let it die again? I physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually cannot watch you idiots drag this out for another two years.”

“Yeah,” you agree with a little laugh, even though you suddenly feel a bit like crying. “I obviously don’t want that either. He said we’ll talk about it when it’s time.”

She sighs heavily. “Don’t leave it up to him,” she instructs. “He’s so dumb, like my god is he dumb. I have faith in you. Handle it.”

“Okay, bossy,” you say, poking her leg with your foot. “I promise to do my best.”

She nods, satisfied. “You better,” she threatens, and then heads to the kitchen to munch on the celery you’d brought her.

–

Seokjin’s last day comes too quickly. You’ve been dreading it for days. You remember all the other times he’s left before - for college, then when he moved, and on New Year’s Day after sleeping with you for the first time. You had spent all of those days at your parents’ house, watching across the street as cars were loaded, or assessing the empty place in the driveway.

It makes it suck less that this time, you’re in your own apartment, and Seokjin is with you, telling you goodbye instead of vanishing in silence. 

“Don’t be so sad,” he tells you sweetly. “We’ll see each other soon.”

“No we won’t,” you grumble, pouting. 

Days ago, you’d curled into his side, clutching the fabric of his white t-shirt between desperate fingers. The cotton had felt like an anchor.

“Jin?” you’d asked, and he’d looked down at you from his phone, where a game waited for his input. 

“Hm?”

“It’s like… three days left.”

“Yeah,” he’d said slowly, like he wasn’t sure where you were going with this. But of course he did - what else could be weighing on your mind? Why else would you bring it up?

“We said we’d decide what to do when it was closer,” you reminded him. “It’s closer.”

“It is,” he agreed easily, turning his phone screen off and shifting to give you his full attention. “And?”

You couldn’t stand it, suddenly, his teasing.

“Seokjin,” you murmured, reproachfully. 

“What?” he asked innocently, bumping your nose with his. He was smiling, like he thought your distress was a little funny.

“Jin,” you whined. “I’m being serious! We need to talk about it!”

“So let’s talk about it!” he had laughed. Then, watching your face, he’d grown serious. He’d brushed his fingers along your jaw, pressed a kiss to the scrunch between your eyebrows. “I’m listening,” he promised.

“When you go home…” you’d said quietly, “I don’t want this to end. I know we said long distance is awful, but…” You trailed off. 

“But what’s the alternative?” he finished the thought for you. “I don’t want this to be over, either.”

“So,” you’d said slowly, hope daring to blossom behind your ribcage, “we’ll try?”

He had nodded seriously, eyes far away as he considered this option. “It won’t be fun, and it won’t be easy,” he’d warned. “But, yeah… I’d like to try. I don’t want to throw this away again.”

As he double-checks his luggage in the doorway of your apartment, he sends you a rueful smile and says your name disarmingly.

“What?” you grumble.

“We’ll see each other soon,” he repeats indulgently. 

“Soon,” you scoff. “Like, what? Christmas?”

He comes to you then, wrapping his arms around your angry shoulders. “Listen,” he says, his dulcet voice soothing you, “My goal is to find a way to be with you. I’m going to go back and do whatever I can to make that happen. Okay?”

“A man with a plan,” you murmur, softening with his reassurances. 

“A man who’s done losing time,” he says solemnly.

It’s the first time he’s leaving you where you have the chance to kiss him goodbye.

It’s the first time he’s leaving you with hope that he’ll return and help you build something better.

–

You and Jin talk on the phone every day that he’s gone. It sucks to be far apart, sure, but somehow this is still better than before - at least now you’re talking, a ton, giggling and flirting openly like you’ve never been able to before. 

At least now you can tell him you love him before hanging up, instead of pretending you don’t, instead of denying it, lying about it, trying to imagine a life where it isn’t your biggest truth. 

Almost a week passes before Jin tells you, ceremoniously, “I… have news.”

“Ooh,” you say. “I’m listening.”

He smiles at you lazily through the screen; you’re each in bed, chatting before saying goodnight. “Don’t get too excited,” he warns you. “It’s good news, but it’s not ideal news.”

“I will temper my expectations,” you promise. 

“I requested to transfer,” he tells you. “I put in the request the day I came back.”

You smile, feeling warm and grateful, feeling full of love and appreciation. “And?”

“It’s not perfect,” he warns you again. “I did get approved, but -“

You squeal. 

“But,” he continues over you, “they want me to work down a 90-day notice and help train someone to take my place here. And the transfer location isn’t in town, it’s in the city.”

You stay silent, thinking about this. 

“So,” you clarify slowly, “we have to wait three months, but then you’ll be here?”

“Not there-there,” he points out. “An hour away.”

“It’s better than now,” you point out. “Even if I only see you on weekends, it’s better than now.”

“It’ll be more than that,” he says. “That’s the absolute worst case scenario. Okay?”

“Okay,” you say, minimizing the call to pull up your calendar. “Ninety days starting… today?” 

“Tomorrow is day one,” he tells you warmly. You click the date on your calendar - a Thursday in early September - and mark it Jin transfers. 

“Can’t wait,” you say, opening the call again. “When are we gonna apartment hunt?”

He laughs. “I’ve already got Minji on it.”

You lay awake long after you hang up, daydreaming of ninety days from now, when Seokjin will be just an hour away, close enough to drive to, close enough to touch. 

— 

“How was your day, beautiful?” Jin greets you before the connection loads his video, his voice finding you before his face does. It’s been about a month and a half of the long-distance thing, and your video call routine is solid.

You roll on your side, holding your phone so Jin can see your sad little face and a good helping of cleavage from your pajama top. “I don’t know,” you pout. “Okay, I guess.”

“Aigoo,” he croons. “What’s wrong with my favorite girl today?”

You sigh heavily; you’ve dropped the act for the most part, and now you’re letting your actual frustration show. It’s about a month into your relationship, a month into making long distance work. 

“I dunno,” you admit. “I think I’m just having a day where I miss you.”

“I’m here,” he says seriously, bringing his phone closer to his face. Disgusting, that you can see him so clearly that you can make out the affection in his gaze, and yet he’s still hundreds of miles away. 

“I know,” you say. “But I guess I miss… the physical stuff.”

He grins wolfishly before you’re even done with the word “physical”, eyebrows waggling suggestively.

You laugh - you can’t help it. “I meant like… I could use a hug. But… yeah, that too, now that you mention it. A little stress relief would be nice.”

Jin shifts on your screen. “Hm,” he says tightly, voice suddenly different enough that it brings your attention to him sharply. “Well, how would you have handled that - before me?”

You feel yourself flush. “Jin,” you scold. “Don’t tease me.”

“As much as I do love to see you get flustered,” he admits, “I am very serious right now.”

How did you miss his expression darkening? Suddenly, his brows are starting to furrow, his eyes narrowed just slightly with intent focus. His voice touches on dangerous.

“What are you doing?” you ask him, words all mumbled through your embarrassment. 

“If you can’t tell me, maybe you should just show me,” he suggests, that edge to his voice singing like the freshly forged metal of a gleaming sword.

“Oh my god,” you mutter, still mostly mortified. Only a little turned on. “I can’t.”

“Why not?” 

“My normal way, is, uh… with some battery-powered assistance.”

You can’t even look at him. 

“Why are you being shy about it?” he asks. “That’s hot. I wanna see - wanna see what you do. Wanna see you come undone.”

You almost gasp, and he makes the mistake of letting his breath out just a touch too loudly, shifting just a bit too suspiciously.

“Are you-?”

“Of fucking course I am,” he huffs, and now it’s obvious that he’s got his hand around his dick - the scrunch of his brows, his teeth on his bottom lip. “Come on, don’t let me party alone.”

“You’re such a dork.” Despite the insult, your thighs are rubbing together as if of their own volition, and you sneak your hand down to press against your core just once for relief. 

“You’d forget all about that if I had my hands on you instead,” he asserts, voice low. “I’d like to see you call me names when I’m up to my knuckles in your -”

“Jin!”

“Am I wrong?” he smirks. You can tell by the way the phone shakes just so that he’s still stroking himself, slowly. 

You have no answer to that. 

“Come on,” he urges. “Let me see. I’m so hard.”

Your breath whooshes from you as he admits this. You’d never done this before - with anyone, not on video. It feels scary, but definitely fun. And, of course, you trust Jin implicitly. You know this will stay between you two.

“Take your shirt off,” you murmur, and the speed at which he obeys would be comical if you weren’t wet to the point of discomfort. 

“You too,” he begs, voice going whiney for just a second. You hesitate, still a little shy, but finally you pull the material over your head, dropping it on the empty side of the bed for later. You roll sideways, placing your arm strategically to prop your tits up a bit. 

“Now bottoms,” he instructs, half breathless. You’re slow to comply, eyes taking in the skin he’s revealed on-screen - tanned shoulders, pecs, dusky nipples, his flat tummy. Eventually you tear your eyes away enough to shimmy out of your pajama bottoms and panties, looking back at him expectantly. 

Seokjin angles the camera down for a minute, displaying the way he’s got his fist around the base of his cock, holding it upright and proud for you. “See what you did?” he grunts, hand sliding up and squeezing the head before taking its place at the bottom again.

“You’ve got crimes to answer for, too,” you tease.

“Show me,” he says, the words tumbling from him. He shifts the camera back to focus on his face. “Please, baby, let me see you.”

It takes some maneuvering, but you manage to bend your leg and prop your phone up, reaching to keep one finger on the top to steady it. You try not to look at your own body on the screen, focusing instead on how Seokjin’s eyes go heavy-lidded as he takes you in, how his breath hitches when you slide your middle finger between your folds and swirl it around in the gathered slickness you find there.

He swears fiercely, and you almost laugh. It makes you warmer, wetter, knowing you can affect him like this. 

“Spread them,” he commands, and you feel yourself clench at the words. 

“Really?” you ask, though you know he means it. You just want to buy time, the feeling of being exposed new and a little frightening. 

“Wanna see,” he repeats, lips barely moving to form the words. 

Finally, you muster the courage and do as he asked with your thumb and forefinger, listening to the slick sound of his hand on his cock, the way his exhales carry the barest touch of a groan. 

“Happy?” you ask after a minute of his huffed breaths, bringing the phone back up towards your face and unbending your leg. 

“Won’t be happy until you come,” he mutters. “Show me what you do. Please?”

“Is that what you want?” you ask, feeling a little breathless. “Just do what I normally do and let you listen?”

“And watch,” he breathes. 

You roll to dig through your nightstand drawer, coming out with a low-key but trusty bullet. When you click it on, Seokjin’s eyes fly to yours through the screen. 

You follow his direction, tilting the camera so he can watch you slide it, on its lowest setting, over your entrance and up to your clit. You retrace this path three more times, slowly, lightly, your body warming up by degrees. When you finally settle it firmly over your clit and leave it, you can’t help the low, rolling moan you let out.

“That’s right,” Jin whispers. “Tell me how good it feels.”

“Not as good as you would,” you admit with a little laugh. 

“Soon,” he promises. And then, “What would you want me to do?”

“God,” you utter, pressing the bullet tighter against your clit. “Anything - your fingers, your mouth - want you inside me.”

He can’t even answer you, eyes sliding closed for a second as he loses himself in your words, in the picture they play in his head, in the memories of you that they unravel. 

“I- I’m getting close,” you warn him, the pulsing starting in gentle, easy waves, a warning sign.

He answers with a groan, and you click the bullet to a higher setting, letting your head fall back and your eyes drift closed as you lose yourself in the vibrations. The call is filled with the sound of steady buzzing, the slick skin-on-skin sound of Seokjin’s hand, both of your gasped and haggard breathing, punctuated by low groans and the occasional whine.

You grit his name between your teeth when you teeter closer. 

“Let go,” he commands, his voice rumbling deeper than you’ve ever heard it. It’s a stark contrast to the higher-pitched whine he lets out when you do, a wordless wail sailing between your lips as your legs shake and your whole body tightens. He comes with a cry before you’ve even caught your breath, quiet and stillness finally settling over you both as you click off your bullet and toss it sideways on your bed to clean off later. 

He smiles beatifically, some of his hair stuck to his forehead. “That was fun,” he says, leaning to reach for something, you assume to clean himself off with. “You feel better?”

“Yeah,” you agree breathlessly, legs still twitching a little. “But not as good as I could. Not as good as if you were here.”

“Soon,” he promises again, eyes crinkling as he smiles at you. “I promise. I’ll be with you soon.”

–

[9:28 AM] You: good morningggg  [12:03 PM] You: wow, busy today huh? hope it’s a good busy and not a shitty busy 😘 [5:02 PM] You: heading home! call me if you get a second? [10:41 PM] You: ok well i’m going to bed… talk tmrw maybe. Goodnight.

You sleep fitfully, filled with unease and disappointment. Your phone’s vibrations wake you close to midnight. You answer it without checking the screen.

“Mm’lo?” you manage, eyes still closed. 

“Baby, I am so sorry,” Seokjin blurts through the line. “I literally just got home.”

Your mind, still mostly asleep, is muddy. “Hmm,” you breathe, trying to process, trying to make coherent words. “It’s so late.”

“I know,” he says sorrowfully. “I was running in circles all day, I legitimately don’t think I’ve peed since morning.”

You let another breath that’s kind of like a sigh. “That’s not healthy,” you murmur.

He laughs a little. “Tell me about it. Anyway, I’m sorry I was MIA all day. I hope you didn’t worry.”

“I didn’t worry,” you tell him, starting to wake up a little. “I knew you were working. Missed you, though.”

“I missed you, too.”

“You were too busy to miss me.”

He laughs again. “Well, I miss you now.” Then, almost to himself, “The moon’s pretty tonight. Looks almost full.”

You shimmy to the edge of your bed, where you can peek through your sheer curtains. The moon is very full, visible just above rooftops across the street.

“I see it,” you tell him sleepily. It gives you a sense of peace that, although you’re far away, although you really failed as a couple at communication today, at least you can share this - the pure white moonlight, the darkened mares barely visible. 

You both go silent for a few minutes, and you keep your eyes on the moon. 

“Hey,” Seokjin says softly. “I know today sucked. It won’t always be like this, okay? One more month - not even a whole month - and we won’t ever have days like this again.”

“Yeah,” you say, a little unconvinced.

“We won’t,” he assures you. “I’ll make sure of it. You’ll be sick of me in no time.”

“Can’t wait,” you tell him with a yawn, finally scooting back into the warm spot you’d vacated, ready for sleep to find you again.

–

Seokjin’s new apartment - a fifty-three minute drive from your own, you timed it - is admittedly really nice. Nicer than your “swanky” one. 

“God, this kitchen,” you marvel after dropping a box of his cutting boards and mixing bowls onto the kitchen counter. “It’s almost enough to make me want to learn to cook more.”

He laughs. “I think I told the agent yes based on this room alone.”

Most of the big furniture pieces were brought up by the moving company Jin had hired, so you help him unload the rest of the boxes from his car and you both look around, trying to determine the best place to start. 

“I’m going to find my sheet sets and set up my bed,” he decides, eyes scanning the many boxes. “That way when we tire ourselves out, it’s ready to go. Can you… maybe find the bag with all my toiletries and get that stuff in the bathroom?”

“Aye-aye, captain!” you chirp, starting to wade into the sea of cardboard, but Seokjin tugs you back gently by your shirt’s hem.

“What?” you ask him, a little giggly. 

“What are you so happy about?” he teases, pulling you close and resting his mouth near your temple, not quite a kiss. 

You shrug, wrapping your arms around his middle and welcoming the hug. You never want to go three months without him ever again. 

“Just…” you say, trailing off to think. “Just happy that you’re here.”

“Yeah,” he smiles. “This is better, right?”

“Couldn’t hug you before,” you agree.

His smile goes sideways. “Lots of things we couldn’t do before.”

You laugh, pushing him away playfully. “Can’t do that until you set the bed up!”

“That is simply untrue,” he points out, even as he heads towards a box clearly labeled linens/blankets/pillows. “You just lost creativity points.”

You roll your eyes, unable to do anything about the grin on your face, and get to work searching for his shampoo.

Later, after you finished the bathroom and started putting laundry away and after Jin spent a solid two hours hooking up all his consoles and messing with the wiring, you lay sideways across his newly made bed, feeling like the bones have melted out of your body.

“Unpacking is exhausting,” you complain. “I was going to drive home tonight so I could sleep later in the morning, but I don’t think I can.”

“Good,” Jin murmurs, sounding half-asleep himself. He rolls and throws an arm heavily over your middle, tugs you closer. “Stay here with me. Stay all night.”

I think… I could stay forever, you think.

–

[10:06 AM] You: morning 😘 today’s gonna be a really rough day at work for me so don’t worry if you dont hear from me until late, ok? [10:06 AM] Jin 🥰: yeah i remembered. good luck, you’ve got this!  [10:06 AM] Jin 🥰: I’ll see you tonight at my place right? [10:07 AM] You: yes - the only thing getting me through the dayyy

By the time you stagger to your car, it’s been dark for hours. Your feet are throbbing in pain, your back feels like you wrestled an elephant, and you’re so tired you almost consider a nap in the backseat.

And then you remember - you’re supposed to drive the hour to Jin’s place tonight. In the six months Jin has been in his new place, you’ve taken turns every few nights making the trek back and forth. Tonight is your turn.

Or, is supposed to be.

You two had only canceled once before, on a night when a terrible rainstorm swept through and made the roads unsafe. Apart from that, you’d always shown up - or he had. 

Guilt, and the desire to see Jin, wage war against your exhaustion until you’re nearly in tears over it. You just don’t know what to do - try and make the drive, or wave the white flag and just go home to a hot shower and, finally, some dinner. 

Eventually, you turn on the car and start towards home, calling Jin as you go.

“Well, look who it is,” he greets you warmly. 

You sniff in reply. “Jin? I don’t think I’m coming there tonight. I’m really sorry. I’m just - I’m so tired, I feel like it wouldn’t be safe - and I haven’t eaten anything since before work and -”

“Hey,” he interrupts you gently. “It’s fine. Do you want me to come there?”

You glance at the clock on the dashboard. “Honestly,” you say, mournful, “I don’t think it’s worth it. I won’t be awake, and even if I am, I won’t be fun.”

“I don’t care if you’re fun,” he says. You know he means it. But still.

“I”m just gonna go home, eat, shower, and pass out,” you say, feeling utterly defeated. “I’m really sorry.”

“Don’t be,” he says. 

You still cry, quietly, mostly out of frustration, the rest of the way home, even after you’ve hung up. Going home to him would have been exactly what you needed tonight, and it feels deeply unfair that you can’t have that. 

You eat first, scarfing down leftovers you pull from your fridge, not even bothering to put on a tv show for noise. You barely even sit down. A hot shower does wonders, and soon you’re collapsing into bed, hardly having the strength to roll over and reach for your charger’s cord. You text Jin another apology and a sweet goodnight, but you’re asleep before he can answer, lost to the dark.

You wake up confused, still engulfed in darkness. It feels like you’ve only been asleep for minutes. You become aware of a noise near the end of your bed and your adrenaline spikes. You sit up, reaching for your phone.

“Don’t mace me,” Jin laughs, coming around the side of the bed and moving the blankets so he can slide in next to you.

You’re frozen, uncomprehending. “Jin?”

“The one and only,” he quips, rolling to cling to your back. “Surprise.”

“I told you not to come!” you splutter.

“Should I leave?” he asks wryly, and you grab his wrist as if he might.

“Don’t you dare,” you say, heart rate starting to calm now that you’ve discovered there isn’t a murderer in your apartment. “God, your feet are like icicles.”

He hums a laugh into your hair, runs a hand down your arm. “Go back to sleep,” he tells you.

You try to listen, scrumping around until you’re comfy again, his body warm and solid behind yours. “Can’t believe you drove here in the middle of the night,” you say finally, a touch of disbelief in your voice. “You’re out of your mind.”

He pulls you tight and then releases you. “Just try and keep me away,” he dares the universe, voice low next to your ear. 

You slowly drift back towards sleep, breathing going even and deep. The last thing you remember before you go under is whispering, “Thank you.” To him. Maybe to the universe. 

–

“I can’t believe I’m doing this for the second time in less than a year,” Seokjin grumbles from his side of the couch that the two of you are trying - and currently, failing - to get up a stairwell. 

“Are you complaining?” you ask, a bit of challenge in your voice. “Are you complaining after your amazing girlfriend found the best apartment, perfectly situated halfway between our jobs, and secured it - all while you were locked into Overwatch? Are you complaining that the living an hour away problem is finally over after an entire year? No more stupid-early commutes, or only seeing each other long enough to sleep - you have complaints?”

“I am complaining,” he asserts, shifting the couch in his hands, “about the physical labor.”

When you get to a good stopping point, hours later, you lean heavily against the kitchen counter. “Should we peruse our new home’s take-out options?” you ask, starting to reach for your phone. 

Seokjin doesn’t answer, which causes you to look up and assess why not. When you meet his gaze, he’s got a look in his eyes that you’re starting to know well.

“Seriously?” you ask with a laugh. “You’re not too tired?”

“For you?” he scoffs, moving closer, predatory. “Never.”

“I’m all sweaty…”

“I deeply do not care.”

“I can do approximately zero percent of the work,” you warn him.

He towers over you, hands coming to grip the counter on either side of your body, caging you in. “Wasn’t planning on you doing any work at all,” he admits darkly, mouth close enough to your ear to tickle. “I’m suddenly remembering almost a year ago, when I promised to bend you over the kitchen table someday. And now, we have our own kitchen table, in our brand new place together.”

Your grin turns predatory in turn. “Alright, you convinced me.”

“Good,” he grunts, and grips your jaw gently enough that it doesn’t hurt, firmly enough that he can easily tilt you back to receive his biting, desperate kiss. 

You moan immediately, melting back against the counter, thrilled by his urgency. You peel off his shirt, letting it drop onto the hardwood beneath your feet, and yours follows soon after. You lift your arms obediently when Jin tugs at the band of your sports bra, rolling it up and sliding it over your arms. He encases you with his arms, kissing you deeply, and you slide your hands down his stomach as you slide your tongue over his. 

It isn’t long before he’s tugging your leggings and panties down in one hand, and you use your feet to free yourself the rest of the way. He’s rough today as he slides his digits between your legs, barely slicking them up before pushing two fingers as far into you as he can, twisting them before pulling them out again.

You breathe his name, clinging to him desperately, hips pushing back against him as he pumps his fingers in and out of you indelicately, causing the last syllable of his name to come out on a whine. You push absently at the waistband of his joggers, too weakly to actually get them anywhere. You make a noise of complaint, and he laughs lowly, punctuating the sound with a particularly vicious flick of the wrist, sending his fingers pistoning into your front wall.

“Jin,” you wail, assaulted by the sudden sensation. “Please, I -” 

“Awfully needy for someone who had to be convinced,” he smirks, and if you weren’t halfway to your first orgasm of the night you might have whacked him for it. 

But then his fingers are slipping out of you, and he’s pushing his joggers and boxers to the ground and pulling you towards the table, telling you quietly, “C’mere.”

When he said bend you over, he meant bend you over, apparently, because as soon as he has you close enough he’s spinning you to face the table, one palm firmly pushing between your shoulder blades until your front presses against the tabletop.

“This okay?” he murmurs behind you, the same hand that pushed you into place caressing a worshipful pattern back down your ribs, sliding over your ass and resting there, waiting.

“Very,” you groan, and shudder when he answers this by leaning his body over your back, his hands splayed on either side of your ribcage, holding him up.

“In that case,” he says, “arms up. Hold the other side.”

Your breath leaves you audibly and you obey, reaching to grip the opposite side of the table. He strokes the curve of your ass again, and then you feel him run the head of his cock up and down your slit - it sends a white-pleasure shock through you when it rubs firmly over your clit and you try to catch it on your entrance as he slides back up.

You whine again, and he chuckles before finally pushing into you.

You both groan as he bottoms out, yours turning to a gasp as he bumps something deep inside you that makes your entire abdomen flex in response. 

“Shit,” you gasp, “you’re so deep this way -”

“Fuck,” he growls, the word torn from his throat as he starts to move. “Why are you so tight, I’m gonna last two minutes like this, damn -”

“Because I’m about three seconds from coming,” you say - or you try to. It comes out more like a moan, your voice shaky and tremulous, betraying you completely. 

“Do it then,” he says, gripping your hips with one hand and reaching around to find your clit with another as he keeps a torturously steady pace. “Come all over me.”

His nimble fingers do the trick and it’s only seconds later that you’re following directions, pressing your forehead desperately into the wood of the table as your body trembles and shakes beneath Jin’s hands. 

You feel your toes curling against the hardwood floor, feel your fingers go tight against the table’s edge, feel your pussy clench around him again and again and again, feel the sensation of light race down your legs and out to your fingertips, feel Jin’s cock slide against your pulsing walls, feel his hands come to your hips to pull you against each stroke.

You hear your first gasped breath, hear the slap of skin on skin, hear the huffs and groans of Jin’s broken breathing behind you as you slowly come back into your body, as the tremors in your legs die back down to tiny, interspersed shakes.

“Holy shit,” you manage, lifting your head off the table and trying to look at him over your shoulder. 

“Can you take more?” he checks, his hand twitching on your hip like he’s keeping it in line.

“Yeah,” you breathe. 

“Good fuckin’ girl,” he whispers, and pulls your hips flush against his, slamming into you, sliding out, slamming in again until you’re keening out syllables that don’t add up to words, eyes screwed shut, exhales warbling out like sobs.

“Take it so well,” he praises, his voice shattered, the words coming through a clenched jaw, as he breathes and focuses and tries to hang on, hips snapping. 

He slows his pace and reaches for your shoulder, pulling you to straighten up, your back flush against his sticky chest. You moan at the change of angle, and then he slips out of you, turns you around again and lets you sit on the edge of the table. He reaches one arm around your shoulders to brace you and slides back in slowly.

Your head falls back, eyes closed.

“Can you look at me?” he breathes, chest jumping as he tries to keep it together.

With difficulty, you lift your head and open your eyes, finding his watching you intently. Gazes locked, he pumps once, twice, three more times and comes with a shudder, his head falling onto your shoulder as he spasms and groans deep and loud. 

His hips slow and then eventually come to a stop. He stays buried deep inside you, lifting his head from your shoulder and bringing his other arm around your back. 

“I don’t think I can walk,” you tell him thickly, your legs shaking.

He slips out of you gently, reaching down to wipe away a bit of mess that followed onto your thigh. “Don’t walk, then,” he tells you, and guides your arms around his neck before lifting you and carrying you through your new apartment towards the en suite.

He sets you gently on the edge of the tub and reaches to turn the shower on full blast. “Did we find towels?” he asks.

You lean against the tiled wall. “The box is on the bed.”

“Okay,” he says, then crouches down before you. “You good?”

“Mhm,” you tell him. He retreats, and you hear the telltale sign of tape being ripped off cardboard. He returns with two towels in hand and gently lifts you, guiding you over the edge of the tub and into the warm spray of water.

You lean against him heavily, sleepiness coming over you like a fog. He runs a hand over your hair affectionately, then leans down to whisper, “Four rooms to go.”

–

“Jin? Is the table set?”

“It’s set.”

“Can you open the wine?”

“Opening.”

“What about the -”

Seokjin takes your hands. You hadn’t even heard him enter the room. You’re too frazzled to even be startled.

“What are you so nervous for?” he asks, peering at you. “It’s Minji and Jungkook and our parents. We could literally serve pizza bagels in our pajamas and it would be fine.”

You sniff. “That actually sounds really good.”

Seokjin looks at you indulgently. “They won’t be here for another half hour. We have lots of time.”

“Okay,” you sigh. “You’re right. It’s just my first time hosting everyone at the same time here, in our place together - it just feels… significant.” Your parents and Seokjin’s family had been to the place you share several times in the last few months, but never together. Never for an event.

“I’m not saying I disagree,” he says gently. “But I promise, everything is more than fine.”

“You’re right,” you say, still unable to help, but glancing around the eating area for any detail you may have missed. 

“Why don’t we try the wine?” Jin suggests. 

“That’s for later,” you remind him.

“There’s plenty. We should make sure it’s good.” He sends you a wink.

You sigh, knowing exactly what he’s up to. “A small pour,” you instruct. “I’m gonna go grab my phone off the charger, I’ll be right there.”

You step through your bedroom without bothering to turn the lamp on, moving by memory over to your nightstand where your phone awaits. When you turn around to head back, you bump into Seokjin, lingering behind you in the shadowy room.

“What are you doing?” you laugh. “I thought you were opening the wine.”

He takes your hands again, how he had just minutes ago by the kitchen table. “You’re right,” he says, ignoring your question. “Tonight does feel significant.”

You feel your brows furrow. “Jin?”

He takes a breath, like he’s steadying himself. “There’s something I want to ask you before everyone gets here.”

Your heart drops into your ass. 

He continues. “I thought for a long time about all the different ways I could do this, because you deserve something spectacular. But, I got tired of waiting for an idea that felt good enough and I just want you. So…” He trails off, digs in his pocket, pushes something square and velvet into your hands. 

“Jin,” you whisper, heart pounding. It feels right, somehow, that it’s happening like this. Just you and him, the apartment - the world - silent around you, speaking quietly through the dark.

It’s always been you and Seokjin, in the dark.

“So,” he continues, like if he stops he’ll lose his nerve, “I want to ask you… if you want to get married. If you’ll marry me.”

“Yeah,” you whisper. “Yes.”

He wraps you in a hug, and you say, muffled by his shirt, “Can we go back in the light so I can see the ring?”

Later, he sends you a sly sideways smile. “You know my sister’s going to spot that before she’s even through the door.”

You laugh, rolling your eyes. “Maybe I’ll keep my hands in my pockets all night, just so I don’t have to hear her.”

He bumps you lightly with his hip so you’ll look up at him. “Are you happy?” he asks quietly. 

You think about everything you’ve been through - a lifetime of wanting, years of misunderstanding, and over a year between figuring it out and now. Finally, finally, everything has aligned, every piece in place.

“Never been happier,” you tell him, resting a hand on his heart. 

“Good,” he says, leaning down to kiss your temple. “Let’s stay that way for a long, long time.”

–

“No, you hang up first!” Minji squealed for the ninth time, before blowing many kisses into the phone and finally hanging up with her boyfriend. She was twenty, in love, and had somehow lost you from her bedroom during the course of the phone call. 

Calling your name quietly, she’d left her bedroom, typing a text to you as she peered into each of the rooms of the house, even the basement where Jungkook and his friends were still drinking. 

“Don’t get alcohol poisoning,” she warned them. “Has anyone seen Y/N?”

Finally, she decided you must have gone home and started padding back to her bedroom, sending you one more angry text to find in the morning. 

As she passed Seokjin’s room, she noticed his door was open about a foot. She stepped closer, just meaning to pull it closed - they did that for each other if they fell asleep with it open, it was just muscle-memory at that point - and then froze.

You were in Seokjin’s bed, fast asleep, curled up facing the door. For a second, she thought you were alone, but then she spotted Jin’s arm over your belly, his shoulders peeking out from behind yours. 

She bit her lip, staring, silent. In his sleep, Seokjin’s arm flexed against you, and Minji watched as you instinctively reached up to touch his arm, butterfly light, before letting your hand fall back to the mattress again.

She closed the door quietly, continued down the hall to her own room.

She knew better than to interfere, knew better than to meddle and mess it up. But still...

Maybe someday, she thought. Maybe someday you’d figure it out.

<- Prev

wow i can't believe it's over!! thank you so much for being here along the way - i know this was very different from my normal and i hope you had a really fun time reading! <3

[unexpectedgeese]

Major Orv spoilers but anyways

Been thinking about the way that Sing-Shong built up the secretive plotter, the oldest dream, and tls123. The first impression you get from them is that they’re these all powerful deities who can shape the world as they see fit. And that first impression is horribly, ironically wrong.

The Secretive Plotter is introduced to us as a minor player, as a constellation so weak he was never mentioned in the original story. And even as Kdj realizes that he’s actually really powerful, the idea that he’s a being outside of the story sticks with us. SP is the first character we see that can travel between world-lines. He’s literally an outer god- a being outside of the story. But when you actually connect the dots and realize that he’s Yjh, that gets flipped on its head in the most delicious way possible. He’s literally the protagonist. He’s the one that’s MOST trapped by the story- he watches himself fail again and again and again until he gives up on ever escaping that narrative.

The oldest dream is the same- although we don’t see much of him until his identity is revealed, Sing-Shong does a great job of hyping him up as this big final boss that the characters are going to have to face. We don’t know much about the oldest dream, but we do know that he’s powerful. He’s Yjh’s sponsor, after all- a being so revered that nobody can mess with him, not even the bureau. We know that we hate him, too- pretty much everyone, readers included, are PISSED about the whole regression thing. We assume that he’s just like the other constellations- Some uncaring asshole who created a world filled with torment just to watch it unfold. Hell, if you’re still hung up on the whole author thing, you might even assume that the Oldest Dream is tls123. And that’s reversed SO. WELL. with the reveal- he’s literally the most powerless being of them all, to quote Uriel. He’s a kid, dreaming of a world where he’s not alone. He didn’t create this world out of some morbid curiosity of his; He loves the story more than anyone else. He’s not the author, he’s the reader. He’s Kim Dokja, and he’s not a monster.

And God, tls123? Don’t get me started. The identity of the author is one of the central mysteries of the story. As the audience, we’re trying to figure it out the second we start reading- Is the secretive plotter the author? Is the Oldest dream the author? And in the middle of all this guesswork, literally NOBODY suspects Han Sooyung. As the readers, we just kind of assume that the author is going to be some all-powerful deity who created the world on a whim, Because they’re the author. But we’re entirely wrong on that. Hsy didn’t create the world. If anything, she did the opposite- Writing WoS is the action that cements the timeline in stone. She ended it, in a way.

It’s like... Throughout the whole series, you’re waiting to meet God. You expect that the world’s the way it is because there’s some guy making all the rules, doing evil, perpetuating the cycle, etc. There has to be a guy- who would the protagonists fight otherwise? How else are they going to break the loop?

And then you figure it out, and you realize that there isn’t a guy. There’s no one, singular person in charge of the story. The author can’t write without a protagonist to write about, and a reader to read their story. The protagonist can’t move forward if the author doesn’t write the next page, and the reader doesn’t read it. The reader can’t read if there’s no book, or if there’s no character. They all need each other to get anything done.

[currantlee]

My Top 5 favorite Pokémon Boss Battle Themes

So, I fell into a pit of my Pokémon nostalgia. Don't look at me, I loved these games as a kid, and I don't enjoy what they have become. That being said, I really hope the Sinnoh remakes - both BDSP and Legends - are good, since Sinnoh was my first region and I'd hate to see it butchered. Plus, they look promising. But I'm not getting my hopes up yet, I'll wait for reviews.

Anyways, one of the things I enjoyed so much about these games is the music. I could probably hum you some of the Sinnoh tunes, or even sing the lyrics I imagined for them (it's obvious that Sinnoh is still my favorite region, isn't it?). Or I could list some of my favorite music tracks from all across the series. So... I did just that to get my hype energy somewhere 😂

So yeah, I hope you enjoy this little list 😊 I tried to explain the stories and memories associated with those musical themes as well as I can for those of you who aren't into Pokémon. That being said - spoilers for Pokémon OmegaRuby and AlphaSapphire, Pokémon HeartGold and SoulSilver and especially the Sinnoh games ahead.

Oh, and if you do know Pokémon - please leave a comment or reblog and tell me what your favorite boss battle theme is, I'd love to know!

Since Pokémon doesn't have an explicified boss definition, here is what I define as boss battles in Pokémon:

Rival Battles

Gym Battles

Elite Four Battles

Champion Battles

Commander Battles

Admin Battles

Legendary / Unique Pokémon Battles

Frontier Brain or similar Battles

With that being said, let's go!

#5: Pokémon UltraSun/UltraMoon: VS Ultra Necrozma

I will admit, I haven't played the game. I heard this battle is actually pretty difficult, but I can't speak for myself on this. Pokémon games have stopped to be enjoyable to me with Sun and Moon, which had an amazing storyline and some great gameplay concepts, but just... Not enjoyable to me. And USUM seemed like cashgrab to me. I will say though, this musical theme has something and might as well be the best legendary battle theme of modern Pokémon for me.

#4: Pokémon OmegaRuby/AlphaSapphire: VS Brendan/May

In Gen3, Game Freak tried out a new approach with the rival character. See, you always have a rival in Pokémon, and up until this point, all rivals were pretty much jerks. What this new approach was? Well... Let's just say they made the rival character the crush of the player character.

Depending on whether you play as Brendan (whom everyone thought to have white hair before ORAS, except Hidenori Kusaka and Satoshi Yamamoto, who make the Pokémon Adventures manga) or as May, the other will be the rival, and let me tell you, the game pushes this ship really hard in my opinion. It's no wonder why the manga chose to write Ruby and Sapphire, Brendan's and May's counterparts respectively, as a romantic couple, who even confess their love for each other - twice.

Their battle theme conveys this perfectly: this isn't two people who hate each other battling, these are two friends, who might like each other more than you like a casual friend, battling to spend time together. Despite that, both of them are determined to not lose.

One of my favorite moments in the entire game is the ending of it. After the credits (during which Brendan and May are riding their bikes home together) have rolled, you arrive at the pond where you and your rival first met, and they will challenge you to a battle once more. It's when you hear this theme, the one you've listened to every time you battled Brendan or May during the game, and it's just an amazing moment in my opinion, one that is accompanied by this soundtrack, following absolute silence.

And yes, I prefer the remake version of this track.

#3: Pokémon Diamond/Pearl/Platinum: VS Cyrus

Since Kingdom Hearts is currently my main fandom and therefore most people following me probably know more about that series than about Pokémon, let me explain who Cyrus is: Cyrus is the Xehanort of Pokémon. And that up there is his battle theme. And safe for the one time they butchered it by turning it into a disco song for USUM, it's absolutely perfect.

I especially like the beginning. It conveys intensity and the dangerous situation you're in. I mean, Cyrus literally wants to destroy the universe to replace it with a new one he will rule as a god. He also regards all emotions as weakness and will openly admit that his grunts are useless and merely tools to him. Honestly, he is the most terrifying antagonist of the entire series to me, mainly because his plan is that of a madman, but he is actually serious about it (and unlike Xehanort doesn't let go of it even after his defeat).

At the same time, the musical theme sounds hopeful - like all will be good. And I mean, all is eventually good. You have your Pokémon with you, and Cynthis (who also has a badass battle theme by the way) helps you out too. Here is a great thing about the Sinnoh plot: Cynthia has been built up as a character you can trust, and her philosophy is the direct contrast to Cyrus'. So when she helps you battle Cyrus and Team Galactic - you know she won't let anything happen to you. Despite how terrifying Cyrus is as a villain, you know you're safe, because you have not only your Pokémon, but her on your side. Oh, and she is the final boss of the game. So in the end, you and your Pokémon overcome not only the villain, but also the person who held your hand the entire time.

Sorry this turned into me gushing about the plot of the Sinnoh games, but I can't help it 😅 On with the show!

#2: Pokémon HeartGold/SoulSilver: VS Champion/Red

If Cyrus is the Xehanort of Pokémon, then Red is it's Yozora. And while his musical theme is technically not his alone, I definitely associate it with him more than I associate it with Lance.

One of the best things about Red in my opinion is how he is foreshadowed during the entire game. Like, in the first city you visit, an elderly man will tell you about a boy named Red who three years ago saved the neighbouring region Kanto from the evil Team Rocket. Then, you hear nothing about him for a very long time - until Blue Oak mentions him again on Cinnebar Island and you meet his worried mother at Pallet Town.

While Red is technically an optional secret boss, the game makes you want to beat him through the little details it reveals about him. That he is a legend, that he is the true Champion of the Indigo League... To me, his mother worrying about him was always what got me the most.

I have to say, I also got a soft spot for the 8-Bit-version of the theme, it's just not what I grew up with. I admittedly never played GSC. I also like the Gen7 take on the theme, which mixes the original melody with the Alolan vibes.

#1: Pokémon Diamond/Pearl/Platinum: VS Dialga / Palkia

I don't know how, but they managed to make the piano in this theme as epic as a theme for those two Dr Who-deities deserve. It sounds mysterious and it makes you respect what is in front of you, without sounding bombastic like Arceus' theme (which is also freaking amazing, ngl). Not that that is a bad thing, but I feel like the mysterious vibe fits Dialga and Palkia, who are the embodiments of two very abstract concepts. Arceus is simply god, and that's that. But Dialga and Palkia are the embodiments of time and space, two concepts that are far more difficult to grasp than "god".

Dialga also has an amazing battle theme in Pokémon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Time/Darkness/Sky, which definitely deserves an honorable mention here (Palkia's theme in said game is okay, but they definitely got the short end of the stick IMO).

I really hope they're not going to butcher this theme (or Cynthia's. Or Cyrus'. Or any of the Gen4 themes really) in the remakes. But the one thing Pokémon didn't mess up completely for me so far is the soundtrack (except that one time they turned Cyrus' theme into a disco song, which really doesn't fit him at all). So I have faith in that at least.

What's your favorite boss battle theme in Pokémon? Leave me a comment if you like, I'd love to hear about it!

[zhongshen]

𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞 - 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐨𝐩 . gloved hands meet in one at the small of his back , the slope of his back having finally gained a more natural curve , as opposed to the stiff rigidity it had maintained for the first few dawns of his mortal disguise . even the hardness of his stare had relaxed somewhat , as the features of the human zhongli had now become natural . it was not a difficult transition , & few had any suspicion that he was anything more than human , if not for the rumors regarding his possible existence as a secret adeptus . physically , he was only seen as a simple , though austere , gentleman . but his demeanor was outstandingly peculiar .

though wishing to be discreet , his assimilation to liyue harbor had only gained him a very present notoriety : & though only employed at wangsheng for the service of advising on funerary rites & rituals the lay citizen may not know the complete history nor performance of , he had hence become a consultant for the whole of liyue . men of all ages sought out his crystal - clear recollection of history , his counsel , as if memory alone was a skill commendable enough to merit his every guidance . a habit difficult to stop . those who asked his help received it , with every blessing of a fallen deity.

but there were also those who did not look to him as some secret adeptus , did not call upon him as a mentor . it was most gratifying to find those who regarded him plainly . as rex lapis , few stood beside him as friends & compatriots , being held as the just , guiding god of liyue . those who had were perhaps among the most valuable to him , but many had since retired into seclusion , or faded away , lost to legend . it then was no surprise that he valued the simple , unembellished hospitality shown to him by the vendor . baizhu , a figure known to him very intimately , had ever given the consultant zhongli humble attention . for that , he had only returned the like . one who could have perhaps rivalled him at his most strong now content to stand on equal ground . both wearing human skin . both seeming to understand such secrets should not be uttered . there are times he wonders if the unassuming mr . baizhu knows .

　　　❝             how unfortunate .   ❞ if the flatness of his tone is any indication , he is far from remorseful at the absence of mr . gui . if anything , there is a note of sarcasm lingering at the edge of his speech : he knows that baizhu knows he does not make the walk to bubu pharmacy to visit him . zhongli takes two steps closer of his long stride , obeying his silent come - hither , & how lovely is it to see that sly look a little closer . lacking the fury of the ancient ones , but as venomous as one can recall . ❝   my well - wishes for his quick recovery . i am certain he has received the best care from his boss . there is no doubt in my mind that he will make a speedy return . . .   ❞ but do not hasten him back into his post .

　　　❝   not pomegranate leaf . i require a balanced reagent to take its place . surely , bai - xiansheng , you have a recommendation ?   ❞ as he approaches the counter , one hand leaves its home behind his back , & two fingers rest upon the top . his core stays its distance , but the gesture prods into the space of the other , as if asking permission to stand so close . if nothing else , the senses greatly desire to be engulfed in the entirety of his being . seeking the volume of his voice , the headiness of his scent , the whole of his vision to be upon him . knuckles remain on the countertop may he ask this much ?

⁜    景气   :    starter [ for @caduceuss ]

𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐊 𝐎𝐅 𝐃𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐃 𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐋𝐔𝐒 & 𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐎𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐄 . the hearty spice tickles his throat , as inhaling thickly of the rich scent . cabinet upon cabinet of dried , mottled herbs have left the air around bubu pharmacy heavy with the dense aroma . the moment the consultant steps close , it already clings to the fabric of his clothing with its cloying headiness , sure to follow him even after he departs . through it , bletilla striata . so familiar , a pinch of its blossoms pinned against his breast many evenings , to keep its sweet perfume pressed at the forefront of his senses . it is not coincidence . the cool colors of the pharmacist are summoned from the rear of the shop , & the smell of wet earth overcomes the dried herbs , cutting through as the whole of the lord's mind comes to focus on the man . ( for someone who seems to seldom leave the walls of liyue harbor proper , perhaps it is the vision hanging on his waist that conjures the missing flora to him . )

　　　❝             good morning , bai - xiansheng .   ❞ it is the fourth time since the fall of the full moon that he has visited , now twice in ten days . though not without intention , always with need . only that these needs could easily be met on his own . the mortal zhongli enjoyed the short walk to the pharmacy , the quality of bubu's wares , & most of all the company of its chemist . needing prior pomegranate leaf , today pomelo . as was the case , in accordance to his own discretion , knowing well the intricacies of all degree of ritual both meant to chase away evil spirits , one bearing more warmth than the other in their energy , & therefore ill - suited when needing balance . of course , all such things need not be explained to a practitioner such as mr. bai .

　　　❝   your apprentice is away ?   ❞ the consultant is not one to belay his duties for conversation , though that intention is often lost by his willingness to share in his depth of knowledge . this , however , is conversation for the sake of conversation . the better half of his morning has already been spent on his other errands , the bulk of his desk - work having been completed in the earliest hours of the prior night . all that then remains is this final stop , ere he take his station at the funeral parlor once more for completion of the day . . . by then , business doors will be locked & all that then remained was the chance of the pharmacist taking to the street for the evening .

[thenukacolachallenge]

little interactions between my ocs:

-Coco was actually the first to notice that Cash had an addiction(she saw her track marks one day and put two and two together). even though they’d never spoken before, and Cash was pretty sure Coco disliked her, one day before she was about to leave the Tanaka compound, Coco approached her with a care kit: a collection of clean needles and some sharps bins, narcan in case of overdose, a drug testing kit to make sure she what she was using was pure, and a list of treatment centers near the compound and in Nevada where Cash lived. Cash almost cried from it. also, she found out Coco didn’t hate her, and that she was just naturally quiet around strangers and has serious RBF. that exchange was what helped Cash get on the road to recovery.

-Coco also ended up getting Cash into more modern music. mostly rock. when they travel together they belt out music together. Coco does all the harmonizing.

-Cash gives everyone nicknames. her nickname for Coco is “Little Bitty” (bc Cash is close to 6′ and Coco stands at 5′3″) or “Tower of Terror”. she refers to Coco’s deity powers as “Demon Shit”, even though it’s not a demon. she calls Izzy “Boss Lady”, Sai “Small Medium at Large”(she’s short, can see the future, and is often out on her own doing who the fuck knows). when she meets Calli, her nickname is “Littler Bitty.”(Calli is 5′ exactly)

-Izzy and Coco are technically adoptive sisters, and Coco considers her just as much family as she does her own sister. she doesn’t agree with all her decisions though, especially trusting Kano in any capacity. as such, she won’t run certain missions that Izzy needs done, and out of respect Izzy doesn’t push the issue.

-way at the end of it all, when Coco and Kabal finally get together, and Coco manages to stop keeping secrets from Calli all the time, Calli and Kabal finally meet. she calls him Sonic bc of her love of video games and his speed. he’s surprisingly okay with it, since she doesn’t mean it in a mean spirited way(she’s actually super impressed with his abilities)

-otoh, Coco tries to fight Fujin and Raiden when she finds out Calli has been pinged by them to be a protector of Earthrealm. she’s super pissed that these gods that neither of them worship want to put her only remaining flesh and blood in harm’s way. it doesn’t go well. Fujin eventually manages to calm her down after the ass-whooping. she still doesn’t like it but she tones down the overprotective big sister thing eventually.

-Izzy and Kano have fought three times thus far. the score is 1:1:1 - one Kano win, one Izzy win, and one draw. the draw basically went down like the end of the music video for “Boyfriend” by Ariana Grande and Social House. Coco was the one who discovered the trashed room and them cuddling. she just shook her head and left.

-Tanaka Industries and the Black Dragon were briefly in an alliance, until Kano stole some of Izzy’s robot schematics while she was out of town on business. Coco fought a pre-burn Kabal and won, but lost to Kano after he pretended to have lost, then pulled a knife on her. she still has a scar under her collarbone from it and is very eager to repay him for it.

-Izzy managed to trick Kano in the end, though: the schematics he thought he stole had actually been replaced with very basic prototypes that weren’t nearly as valuable. Kano gets very annoyed when that fact gets brought up.

[chibienvychan03]

My Fictional Secret Admirer - Part 1 of That Damned Pikashaw Series

Secret Santa gift for Sakurras on a MLQC Discord I’m a part of.

Pairing: Gavin x MC, side of Minor x Willow

 Warning: potty mouth/pervert Shaw, Sassy MC, little shit Zappy

 Summary: Argh a certain someone is moving slower than an ice berg on a cold day. You voice your frustration to your gal pals, but a certain brat happens to overhear. He somehow convinces (ropes) you into pranking Gavin big time.

After a long day, you and a few female employees decide to have a girl’s night out. Sorry, not sorry Minor. It’s been awhile since you’ve done something with only your gender, and you’re going to have fun, not worrying about the opposite gender especially a certain someone who moves slower than an ice berg on a cold day, and that’s his good day too.

 “And I’m not kissing him until he gets lessons.”

 WHAT?! This sends you crashing back to reality. 

 “Ouch. So mean to your boyfriend,” Kiki pouts as she plays with the straw in her drink, twirling it around and sometimes blowing bubbles just because she can.

 “And what about you? You haven’t kissed yours,” Willow points out as she’s stirring her drink. At least she can drink alcohol. Due to your low tolerance and Kiki turning the age where she can legally drink alcohol, you’re the designated safe person/driver.

 Kiki sticks out her tongue and blows a raspberry. “We’re taking things slow. You’ve told me not to rush into things.”

 This statement Willow can’t refute. “For once, you actually listen to me.”

 “HEY! I listen to you, but that doesn’t mean I’m paying attention,” Kiki replies with a cheeky grin. “But at least we have boyfriends.”

 You want to say the two of them have boyfriends. On the other hand, you do not as someone is taking his sweet time and NOT asking you. You’re not even sure he wants to be with you on that level. Instead of responding, you flag down the bartender and ask for another soda, but this time with a few cherries in it. The bartender doesn’t give you a look this time as he knows you’re the designated driver, meaning you can’t become impaired. He doesn’t question it once he finds out.

 The two are looking at you. “What?”

 “You have a boyfriend, right?” Kiki pokes you.

 “Er… I’m too busy with work to consider having an intimate relationship.” In other words, you have no boyfriend even if you want one in the first place.

 “Aren’t you dating that handsome cop? Gavin.” Willow prods while waggling her brows. How she manages that move, you don’t know nor do you ask.

 In response, you turn a bright red, enough to make a tomato green (red) with envy. “He hasn’t asked.”

 “He what?!” Kiki shouts after she almost chokes on her drink. She hits her chest to clear her airway.

 “He didn’t ask her,” Willow reiterates your response, saving you the trouble of answering two times. She picks up her cherry by its stem before twirling it. “Then why don’t you ask him?”

 “I don’t know if he feels the same way I do, and he doesn’t give other women any thought,” you say after some hesitation. It’s not that you’re jealous of the other women. More like frustrated with him and how slow he’s moving. Sometimes you wonder if he’s even moving at all.

 Willow snorts upon your confession. “Girl, have you seen how he’s all over you? He’s crazy about you. And you’re crazy if you let him go.”

 “He’s worried about me,” you say, not wanting to admit it… just yet. “Being his junior from high school. You know?”

 This time Kiki snorts. “Oh it goes beyond worrying about junior classmates. You’re too blind to see it.”

 “What do you mean by that?” you huff and cross your arms over your chest while waiting for your soda to arrive so you can have something to play with.

 “Oh my gods, the two of you are painfully ignorant. It’s ridiculous.” Willow picks up her drink and starts sipping from what remains of it. “Woman up, ask him on a date. It’s the twenty first century. Unless he grows a pair of balls, it’s up to you.”

 “What do balls have anything to do with dating and boyfriends?” You glance between the two of them who in return are giving you looks of exasperation. What? “Aren’t they toys for kids and pets?” Last time you recall, balls are spherical objects mean to give joy to whoever played with them whether it be for sport or simply having for.

 “Even I know what that is, and I’m younger than you.”

 Like ouch. Does Kiki have to point that out? “Gavin does have a ball cactus.”

 As if on cue, both Kiki and Willow bang their heads on the bar like you see in the manga you’ve read where someone is exasperated at another person. What? Is it something you said? You’re left in the dark again. Maybe it’s time to do research on this kind of stuff… if you ever have the time. Between your work, taking care of yourself/home, and hanging out with friends, you don’t have time to do this research. Besides you do a lot of research for your work and sometimes you’re researched out!

 “His name is Thorny and is surviving.” Surviving from Gavin giving it too much love (more like water).

 “So is Gavin’s love for you,” Willow adds. “Don’t keep him waiting too long.”

 “Yeah, you don’t won’t to become that old cat lady.” Gee thanks Kiki.

 “HEY!” You huff. “It’s not my fault he’s moving slower than an ice berg on a good day.” Finally the bartender arrives with your soda, and he’s given you a little umbrella. Oh how sweet. It’s your favorite color too, pink.

 “This dance is never going to end,” Kiki sighs a long one. She knows something or maybe it’s the alcohol talking, but either way, you want to know.

 “Touche. It’s too painful to watch these lovebirds dance around each other.” Willow glances upward as if she’s asking some heavenly deity to do something about these two lovebirds.

 “Someone has to get it going,” Kiki says as if you’re not sitting right next to them at the bar.

 Willow nods her head. “Indeed. Dropping hints is useless since we all know how excruciatingly painfully oblivious both parties can be.”

 Ouch and double ouch. Are you really that ignorant? Scratch that, you don’t want to know. “You two are drunk.” Yeah, that has to be the case.

 Kiki bursts out in giggles. “You wish. I think I’m a bit tipsy, but I still can think! Unlike a certain someone we all know too well.”

 Great. Now Kiki’s roasting you too? It makes you wonder if she’s been secretly spending time with a certain CEO who has a penchant for roasting you on a regular basis. Nah, it couldn’t be, could it? Between her school work, work, her boyfriend, and close friends, you doubt she has much time to learn the fine art of roasting people.

 You smack her with your purse, not too hard since you need her to be able to work in a couple days.

 Her response? She starts giggling hysterically.

 “Ignore her. She’s drunk.” Willow waves her hand, the one not holding her drink. “But all things serious. Be direct and up front with Gavin. Dropping hints will get you nowhere.”

 “I don’t know. What am I supposed to do? Walk up to him and demand to know why he hasn’t asked me on a date?” Or kissed, but that happens after you start dating. It’s not like you’re complete strangers. You already have a long history with him even if a fair chunk of it is you misunderstanding him.

 “I’m sure you’ll figure something out. You always have.”

 “Or you can pull him down by his tie and kiss kiss.” Kiki makes kissing sounds.

 The mere thought of doing what Kiki suggests causes you to turn bright red. “I don’t think he’s into PDA.” As for you, you don’t think your heart can take it even if you want it.

 “Oi vey. Of course he’ll want to stake his claim on you, but it’s only if you let him. Guys are like that. Trust me. He’d want to let the entire world know you’re his.”

 “Wow, I didn’t know Officer Gavin has a possessive side. Maybe Kiro would be a better choice.” Ah the Kiro fangirl emerges.

 Willow rolls her eyes. “Not that kind of claiming, more like being in an exclusive relationship, and you’re off the dating market.”

 “I’ll think about it.”

 Just not that night. All you want to do is go home and sleep.

 But first you need to make sure your drunk and slightly drunk friends make it home in one piece. After all, you’re the designated person… and a responsible boss.

 Gavin <3 Gavin <3 Gavin <3 Gavin <3 Gavin

 Unlike your so called friends, you wake up the next day hang over free, which puts you in a very, very good mood. Good enough to tease those two through texts about what a wonderful day it is. When they do not reply, you’re not surprised. They’re probably hiding underneath their blankets and covers, waiting for the world to stop spinning or for the loud noises to go away. You’re tempted to suggest getting noise cancelling headphones. Being an unfortunate traveler (for work sigh), you procured a pair of your very own. Plane and train terminals tend to be quite noisy. Sometimes you want to hear yourself think.

 When you unlock your phone, you notice you have a few messages. You start reading your messages. 

 Levi : When’s a good time to bring over my gifts for you?

 “Big brother spoils me,” you giggle. While you’re not officially related or by blood, he’s taken you under his wing. The last time someone tried coping a feel, well let’s just say he wound up in the hospital with two broken hands.

 You then remember him saying something about an overseas trip he’s taking back to the States, something about visiting his adopted family. He rarely mentions them and when he does, it’s bits and pieces. Since you respect his privacy, you try hard not to poke your nose into it and ask too many questions. If or when he’s ready, he’ll tell you. So far, you know he’s adopted and has one adopted brother but no sisters.

 MC: How about having lunch? It’s been a long time since we got together.

 Levi: Sounds like a plan. That new café? The one you mentioned in your moments post? :D

 Wow. Does he have his phone in his hand all the time? Or maybe you’re lucky and catch him when he’s actually looking at his phone?

 MC: That sounds great, and no we’re going double dutch. You’re NOT paying for mine.

 Levi: ): I’m catching up on all the years I haven’t spent with you.

 MC: I bet you bought me a ton of souvenirs. 

 Levi: XD Caught red handed. Okay, we’ll pay our own bill.

 Seeing those emojis, you can’t help but giggle again. It’s not that many, however, you don’t recall any male you keep in contact using them on a regular basis. You decide to not say anything about it especially since it appears he’s having fun.

 Anna: You forgot to text me when you arrive safely at home.

 Oh oops?

 MC: Sorry! D: I knew I forgot something, but I couldn’t remember. Next time I’ll write myself a reminder.

 Okay next text.

 Kiro: Miss Chips! Hear anything about Souvenir? QAQ They haven’t been opened lately, and I’ve been craving their food.

 Kiro: Forgot to tell you, I’ll be busy for the next 2 to 3 weeks. If they open, you have to let me know. K?

 MC: Are you planning on sneaking out if they’re open?

 Kiro: Please don’t tell Savin! I’m tired of the same old, same old food.

 MC: Fine. You owe me for keeping an eye on that restaurant.

 Kiro: Miss Chips is the best! Crap. Gotta get back to work. Chuu.

 You stare at your phone. Did he just? Nah, you’re probably reading too much into things like a certain couple of busybodies do on a regular basis. Since you don’t want Savin to catch him texting you, you decide to text him later with an update on his favorite restaurant.

 Gavin: I’m free today. Would you like to have lunch with me? My treat.

 Er… You already made plans to have lunch with your big bro. But the more the merrier, right?

 MC: You can join me and my big bro for lunch. He got back from his trip.

 Gavin: Since when do you have a big brother?

 MC: A few months ago. I meant to tell you then, but you were swamped with work and then it slipped my mind. Sorry! It wasn’t on purpose I swear.

 Gavin: He sounds kind of fishy if you ask me.

 MC: He’s not like that. Just wait until you meet him. 

 MC: For the record, he broke two hands of someone trying to touch me.

 Gavin: Why didn’t he beat the guy up?

 Unbelievable. You can’t believe Gavin would suggest such a thing.

 MC: It was crowded and we’re in public.

 Gavin: Give me his contact info. I can help him.

 Something tells you between the two of them if anyone so much as looks at you the wrong way, he’d be sent to the hospital with multiple broken bones, and that’s if they’re feeling generous enough to let the guy live. You’re having second thoughts about the two meeting, but then again, big bro has been pestering you about the guy you’re interested in.

 MC: Ask him at lunch.

 Gavin: Understood. 

 The next text you send is where and when to meet. You hope this won’t be your worst decision, letting these two get to know each other and having team up against anyone who bothers you. “I’ll worry about that later.” While you hope they get along, you hope they don’t get along to the point of being accomplices.

 The last few texts are spam. Didn’t you sign up for that thing about spam texts? These companies obviously aren’t letting that stop them. Whatever. You delete them.

 Thaw: Unlock your window. I know you’re awake.

 MC: Why are here this early?

 Thaw: Just open it!

 MC: It’s early for YOU! *suspicious eyes*

 Thaw: You want to know why I’m here or not?

 This guy. Although you’re tempted to leave him out there in the cold, your curiosity once again gets the better of you. Wait a second, Shaw never said which window, leaving you to look out of every window until you manage to find the one he’s crouched next to.

 “Took you long enough,” Shaw grumbles once you open the window and slips into the warm room. The way he’s dress, he resembles a punk snowman. It causes you to giggle and him to pretend he never heard or saw what you did.

 “If a certain someone told me which window he’s behind, I would have opened it five minutes earlier. Did you forget, I have a lot of windows?” You poke him on his chest, which he swats away your finger.

 “Whatever.” In his language, it means he admits his guilt without actually admitting it. “A little birdy told me something interesting yesterday.”

 “Pearly?”

 “What?”

 “Zappy?” 

 “What the hell?”

 “Fiery?”

 “You describing me or yourself?”

 “Icy?”

 “The fuck?”

 You’ve run out of birds you know, which is a total of four who belong to a certain Birdcop the one you want to move faster. Sheesh. Sometimes you wonder if he’s moving backwards in spite of him wanting to spend time with you.

 “Forget about the birdy. Don’t you want to know?”

 “Something tells me I don’t want to know.” You close the window as soon as you’re reminded you have yet to close it. No need to let perfectly good warm air outside or let the cold air into your warm home.

 Shaw pretty much laughs in your face, to which you’re tempted to slap him… using both hands. “My brother is an idiot.”

 “That’s not nice to say,” you pout. Sometimes you wish you had biological siblings, but you suppose your adopted big brother is better than nothing. His spoiling you has no part in your decision. How does he have all that money in the first place? His first job must be well paying though he never tells you nor do you think he will.

 “I could call him something much worse. You want to hear?” One shake of your head. Nope. “I admit he’s damn good at his job, but when it comes to his personal life, he’s very shitty.” While you don’t appreciate his language, you do agree with him.

 “What about it?” 

 “Grab your laptop or a pen and paper. We’re going to get my fucking moron of a brother to ask you on a date.” Did he just say what you think he said?

 “What are you waiting for? Chop, chop. Unless you want me to look for them myself.”

 On second thought, you’d rather find the items he requested than have him poking his nose or any other part of his body where it doesn’t belong. You grab both your laptop along with a pen and paper. Laptop for research and the pen/paper for keeping notes. Sure, you can use your electronics to keep your notes, but your older brother has told you many times that even if you delete it, that incriminating information can be pulled from the depths of the hard drive. You’d rather not take any chances.

 “Pen and paper? Old fart.”

 You scowl. “It’s called decreasing my paper trail. Did you know they still can find what you’ve deleted on your computer or laptop?”

 Shaw gives you that disbelieving stare. “You finally said something smart for a change. Who told you that? I know you couldn’t have figured that out.”

 Why you! Then again… “I also have a big brother. Want to meet him?” you tell him as you bat your eyes in a suggestive manner. More like you want his face to meet your big bro’s fist.

 “What the hell? You don’t have any siblings. Quit fucking messing with me.” As if he doesn’t do that to you on a regular basis.

 “Well I do now. A few months ago. Got a problem with it?”

 Shaw plops himself down on one of your plush chairs. Hey. Shoes! But he doesn’t seem to be too concerned with it. “As if I care about your family.”

 You tap your foot while crossing your arms over your chest. 

 “Next time have a pair of fucking slippers next to the window.”

 “Normal people enter through the front door.”

 “Have I ever been normal?”

 Point taken. You use his distraction to yank off his shoes, much to his surprise and bring it to where he’s supposed to place them. Since you never know when your older brother or Gavin will drop by, you have a few larger slippers waiting for them. You grab a pair and then throw it at him.

 “Feisty. No wonder my stupid brother is smitten.”

 “What?”

 Shaw pushes off the slippers until they fall onto the floor near him. “But he’s too much of a damned chicken to ask you.”

 “Ask me what?” Not that you’ve actually gone on a date with him or been together long enough for him to pop the question.

 Shaw sighs a long one. “You’re just as stupid as he is. No, it’s not marriage. You haven’t even kissed or gone on a date. So what do you think?”

 “If it’s not that, then… on a date?”

 “FINALLY! She gets it. Yeah, we need him to get his shit together and grow a pair of balls.”

 “We?” There’s that reference to balls. You’ll have to ask your big brother later.

 “Being the ‘loving’ little brother I am, I want him to be with the woman he’s heads over heels over.” Loving? Ha, yeah right. What’s his motive?

 “And how do you propose we do that? You plan on pranking him?”

 “Heh, maybe you’re not as stupid as you look.” Grrr….

 “Like whoopee cushions? Stink bombs? Switching the salt and sugar? Bucket of water on his head?”

 “I take that back. You’re fucking stupid.” Geee thanks, THAW!

 “Whatever you say, Thaw.”

 “You want my help or not?” He’s about to put his stinky feet on top of your nice and clean table. When you glare at him, he plops his feet on the chair nearest to him.

 “Is it illegal?”

 “Is it illegal to be this stupid? If things go according to plan, it shouldn’t.” How many times has he told you his fool proof plans only to have them spectacularly backfire in both of your faces?

 “Then what is it?”

 Your stomach interrupts him as it reminds you that you have yet to eat breakfast. Oops? Since you know the big brat of a mooch is on your chair, you might as well feed him before kicking him out of your apartment. 

 “Is that a stomach or a dragon?”

 “You want free breakfast or not? Yes, I do have Pepsi and Coke.”

 Shaw shrugs and follows you into the kitchen area where you have a table for everyday meals. “I like living on the edge. Why not? It’s free food.”

 What is that supposed to mean? It’s not like your cooking is hazardous to one’s health, not after all those lessons from the certified teachers and your mentor (big brother) and even rare, a certain Tsundere who happens to be a 5 star chef in the disguise of a CEO. You pull a can of Pepsi and Coke from your fridge before placing it in front of your so called guest. Next you set a large plastic cup in front of him.

 “Plastic? I’m not a kid.”

 “I’m not taking any chances.”

 Since you’re going to be discussing… plotting how to get Gavin to “grow some balls and ask you on a date,” it should be something that doesn’t require much concentration. You decide on egg scrambles. As to what you’re going to put in it… Your fridge is nicely stocked thanks to you having gone on your weekly grocery run. You’ll put in red bell pepper, spinach, onions, sausage, and a bit of cheese.

 “No complaining,” you say this as you’re about to start chopping the veggies, waving a large (and sharp) knife at him.

 “Gee. My brother is going to be so whipped when you two get hitched.” He holds hands up in a mock surrender. “Smitten kitten.”

 “So what is your big and glorious plan to get him to ask me on a date?” Thanks to your big brother, your knife skills have vastly improved to where you’re no longer cutting yourself… unless you’re surprised or startled. Since you pretty much live alone, there isn’t much to distract or startle you.

 Shaw props himself up on his hands, his arms on your table. “We are going to give you a secret admirer.”

 “Say what?!”

 Shaw winces and in an exaggerated manner tries to clear his ears. “Gods… I don’t think they heard you in Japan or Australia.”

 You ignore the comment on the volume of your shout. “What do you mean by giving me a secret admirer? Is that supposed to be you?”

 Once Shaw ceases his fake deafness, he becomes as serious as he can be, which compared to others isn’t that much. “No, it’s not me. Why would I want to be a secret admirer of an idiot?” Intense glaring. “We’re going to make up a secret admirer.”

 Of all the ludicrous plans of his, this takes the entire take and then some. “… Are you planning on hiring someone to give me gifts?”

 This time Shaw laughs, but stops when he sees your knife. “No, we’re going to do it ourselves. Mail takes too long. Borrow Zappy from my idiotic brother.”

 Eh? Does not compute. How does Zappy come into this? “Why Zappy?”

 “The little guy is like me. He’ll be more than happy to be a little shit to his owner.”

 “….”

 “And he’s easier to bribe. Hope you have canned mandarin oranges.” Recalling your most recent grocery run, you remember picking up more than a few cans of mandarin oranges. What? You like eating them out of the can when they’re stored in your fridge.

 After chopping your ingredients, you crack several eggs before you beat them in a bowl, imagining each yoke to be a certain annoying person’s face. It’s a productive way to get your frustration out. “Yeah, I have some cans.”

 “One less thing to take care of. Knowing you, you wonder what Zappy’s involvement in it is. Remember way back when, birds were used to deliver messages?” Nod. “Zappy is going to be our delivery bird.” Wait a moment, how would this cute little bird know where you are? Or carry anything? “Trust me on this. That little shit can find anyone when he wants to and I’ve seen him carrying several kilos in weight.”

 “But how would he get what needs to be delivered?” Now you’ve moved to your pan and heated up the oil. Your next move is to stir fry your onions, sausage, and veggies until they’re mostly cooked. If you put them in all at the same time, your eggs will end up burned before the veggies and meat finish cooking.

 That’s when he points to himself. “I’ll be holding onto Zappy until it’s time for delivery and you get back home. My idiotic brother doesn’t recognize my handwriting.”

 “Then how would you get the gifts to give me? I know you’re not fond of shopping for anything you’re not interested in.” Not to mention, he was a cheapskate… most of the time.

 “We’re going shopping today.”

 “I’m having lunch with my big bro and Gavin.”

 Shaw scowls at first but then brightens up. “You can ask your soon to be bf for Zappy.”

 “Won’t it be weird if I ask him?”

 “Heh. Must I explain everything to you. Never mind. I’ll go ahead and do it. You’d think the wrong things. Tell him you need Zappy for a project you’re working on. Technically you’re not lying to him. You have a project but it’s not for work.” Ah that smug smile whenever he comes up with a brilliant plan.

 Since you’re not lying, you decide to go along with it. What Gavin doesn’t know won’t hurt him in this case. “Logistics taken care of. What is my ‘secret admirer’ going to give me?” He gives you a blank stare. “You don’t have any idea.”

 “How am I supposed to know what you like? Remember the key is to make him jealous enough to ask you. That means your secret admirer knows your every preference.”

 That totally makes sense. “And I guess we’re going to be buying everything today?”

 “Most of the stuff. Your secret admirer will be buying you meals to be delivered to your work.”

 Once the scrambles finish cooking, you start toasting the bread. It’ll be done by the time you finish plating your creation. “I guess you’ll be making those calls?”

 “Correct. He can’t see or know you’re ordering them for yourself. Otherwise what’s the point in creating your secret admirer? He’d have to be blind and deaf.”

 You nod your head. “Minor tends to be a blabbermouth.”

 “Fuck… I knew I was forgetting something.” Eh? So Shaw does make mistakes. Good to know.

 “Um? He can tell Gavin what I receive?”

 “I was going to say post your gifts to your moments…”

 “Can’t I do both? It’s one thing to hear about it, but it’s another to see.” You slide over his share, toasted bread and fork included.

 “So you do have a brain. Why don’t you use it more?”

 You reach over to your used frying pan. “How about I start using this more?”

 “You’re perfect for each other.” What is that supposed to mean? “Since you have time, we’ll need to figure out what your secret admirer will be giving you. Minimum of three per day.”

 Monday.

1. Favorite tea

2. Favorite snack

3. Fine candy from overseas

 Tuesday

1. Bouquet of flowers

2. Lunch delivered from fast food restaurant

3. Cute cell phone case

 Wednesday

1. Tea set

2. Lunch delivered from fancy restaurant

3. Coupon for massage

 Thursday

1. Earrings

2. Bracelet

3. Necklace

 Friday

1. Lunch for employees

2. Candy making machine

3. Me in a naughty lingerie

 You make another list and group them according to where you’re buying them. Grocery, candy place, cell phone store, your fave tea place, jewelry shop, massage parlor, and that naughty ahem. Seven shops. Looks like you have your work cut out for you that afternoon.

 “Don’t take forever to eat lunch.”

 You roll your eyes at him. “Of course not, we have a full day of shopping and not a lot of time to do it.” The New Light mall should have everything you need except for that shop. For that, you’ll need to walk a block down, but that’s the last thing on your list as it’s open much later than the others. You guess it’s due to the cliental and emergency purchases.

 When Shaw starts talking about the naughty lingerie, you decide it’s time for him to leave so you can prepare for your lunch date. You kick out a hysterically laughing Shaw.

 Gavin <3 Gavin <3 Gavin <3 Gavin <3 Gavin

 When you arrive at the restaurant on time, you notice two things… or rather two people having a nice conversation with each other. Your big brother and Gavin. Seeing their phones out, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out they have exchanged contact info. You hope it won’t end up with either of them in the hospital as you care for them both in different ways. You race up to them.

 “I hope you haven’t been waiting for long.”

 “Nope. I’m excited to see my little sister.” That’s when you notice several bags near him. “These are all yours.” How are you supposed to carry them?

 “I’m too early, and I can give you a ride,” Gavin offers. 

 Speaking of which, you remember what Shaw has told you about your plan. “Er… mind if we swing by your place?”

 Gavin blinks several times in response.

 “Mind if I borrow Zappy? It’s for a project I’m working on. Please?”

 Gavin runs his hand through his hair. “Sure, but don’t expect him to cooperate. He can be… a pain to deal with.” That’s what he thinks. You know how to bribe this little birdy so it’s no problem. The three of them are smart and each have their own personalities.

 “I have my ways. So let’s grab a table?”

 “Why don’t we put this in my car?”

 Eh, car?

 This time Gavin blushes. “Bought one.”

 Oh. You recall you complaining about the rain and snow whenever he drives you anywhere. While he doesn’t mind it, you do. Not that he’s a horrible driver in inclement weather. You know you’ll arrive in one piece, but that doesn’t mean you’ll enjoy the ride there.

 When you carry your gift to Gavin’s car, you notice your big bro’s truck parked nearby. While it doesn’t stand out, you’ve ridden in it enough time to be able to recognize it even if it’s raining or snowing. Considering how much he’s given you, it makes sense for him to drive this beast of a vehicle. It seems your big bro and Gavin approve of each other so far.

 After you placing your order, an awkward silence ensues. You fidget in your seat as you’re unsure what to start talking about, and you notice your big bro is tired in spite of him trying not to show it. Also you have no clue as to what they’ve discussed in the time before your arrival. You want to know, but at the same time, you know both of them well enough to know they’d clam up before they tell you anything they don’t want you to know.

 “So how was your trip?”

 “Eh. It’s okay. My little brother wasn’t his usual pain in the rear self. My parents were their usual selves.”

 “You mean pestering you about getting a boyfriend and adopting a kid?”

 Your big brother chuckles as he scratches the back of his head. “Yeah. I haven’t found the one, you know?”

 You nod your head, glancing over at Gavin who has taken to playing with his drink as the two of you chat. “You can say that again.” You pause. “I found someone, but… I don’t know if I’m good enough.”

 “Pah. He should be grateful you’re interested in him. If anything, it’s he who isn’t good enough for my little sister. I mean you’re funny, friendly, caring, generous, talented, and hard working.” Just like your one, your brother says what he means and means what he says. So in short, he’s being his genuine self. “If he breaks your heart, let’s just say he’s going to need an ambulance.”

 “Er… that’s not necessary. He’s sweet and caring, but he’s kind of slow on the uptake.” You say while you keep watch of Gavin from the corner of your eye. It seems he doesn’t take a hint as his demeanor becomes sour. Maybe you should stop talking about this as you want him to be in a good mood. “So what are you looking for in a guy?”

 “Hm… Someone strong, honest, loyal, direct, caring, and has an open mind. It helps if he’s smart.” Oh wow, your big brother has really given thought to this. Your thoughts wander to the guys in your life. Two of them fit his description, but one of them happens to be the person you like and the other… well you’re not sure which way he swings. Hell you don’t know if he’s interested in a romantic relationship with anyone. “Not anyone would do.”

 You nod your head. “Agreed. You need to have that special connection.”

 “So who’s your one?” Your brother just had to ask that question. In spite of you two knowing each other for about a year, it feels like you know each other since you were kids. You know he can’t read minds nor see into any time. He so happens to be too smart for his own good.

 Seeing as Gavin is focused on his drink, you nudge your big brother with your foot and then point to Gavin from under the table. It takes him less than a second to get the hint. Could get any more awkward? You have the feeling the answer would be yes, it could. “It’s a secret,” you answer in a sing song way and then stick your tongue out at him.

 Your big brother chuckles before reaching over and ruffling your hair like a pet. By now, you’re used to this and actually don’t mind it. He’s your first sibling, and it gives you the warm feels. “All right, keep your secrets. When I find mine, I’m not telling you.” He glances over to the silent Gavin. “What about you? Have you found your one?”

 Gavin stops playing with his straw and profusely blushes. He attempts to say something, but it comes out as gibberish. Between you and your big brother, you have no clue what to make of it other than he’s completely embarrassed about who he likes. Part of you wants to poke him until he confesses, however, you want to respect his privacy just as he respects yours.

 Although a blushing Gavin looks incredibly adorable and you somehow manage to sneak in a short video of him playing with his straw, you decide to help him out of this. “What about kids? You said you’re going to adopt once you find the one.”

 “Probably two, one girl and one boy. Personally I could care less what their gender is so long as they’re healthy and happy, but I suppose that’s how most parents feel about their kids.” 

 Gavin’s mood goes down. You know bits and pieces about his past, but enough to know that his shit of a father never treated as a son, more like a useless tool. Hah. Useless. Just because someone doesn’t have an evol doesn’t make them useless. Sometimes having an evol is more dangerous than it’s worth.

 “Until I find that person, my kids have feathers and beaks.”

 “Birds?” You hope you can pet them or maybe birdsit them while your big brother is away.

 “I’m in the process of adopting three siblings.”

 “Three at once?”

 Your brother scratches the back of his head. “I’d rather not separate them. They’re close.”

 “Then what’s the delay?”

 “They’re not old enough to leave their parents.” That makes sense. Young birds need their parents just as humans need theirs. “I’ll let you know when I bring them home.”

 “Do you know their genders?” You plan on spoiling his babies, but you need to know their gender, not that they care about colors.

 “Won’t know until their first molt unless I get them tested.” Levi pauses. “I don’t plan on getting them tested. They’re all getting unisex names.” Before you can ask, he answers your question. “They’re normal grey cockatiels. My friend thought he was getting two guys. Turns out he has one guy and one gal. He never saw it coming.”

 “They’re going to a good home.” Between the two of you, they’re going to be so spoiled. Thinking about it, you notice Gavin has gone back to playing with his drink. “How’s Pearly, Fiery, Icy, and Zappy?”

 Gavin looks up. “They’re doing okay. Those three keep breaking out of their cage.”

 “No way. I lost count on how many locks you’ve tried.” It appears all three of them are master escape artists. Good thing they’re well behaved and don’t cause much damage. Before you can ask more questions, your food has arrived.

 You each ordered something different. Gavin has a burger with fries, your brother some pasta, and you have their house special salad. Your brother decides he also wants fries so he orders two. Why two? Because he knows you like them. Ah screw it. You need your carbs to keep you full longer. Plus since your salad is healthy, you can afford to eat the fries he ordered for you. Since he ordered it, he said he’d pay for it. You two squabble over it until you hear someone chuckling and look over to find it’s Gavin. It seems the two of you behave like siblings. You let him buy you the fries since they don’t cost a lot, but you’re not budging on the salad. However, when you go to pay for it, you discover someone already has paid for it. You round on your brother who shrugs and promises you he only paid for the fries. Additionally Gavin is acting strangely around you. It appears he paid for your salad. Your brother has kept his promise, however, you know Gavin made no such promises.

 Oh well. It frees up funds for your next project. After giving your big brother a few hugs and telling (warning) him to get some sleep, you join Gavin in his car and head to his place. He doesn’t ask you what or why you need that specific bird to which you’re thankful for. 

 At his door, you hear all four of them making a racket. You wonder if they know you’re there. Since the three birds keep clustering up in one cage every single night, Gavin sells two cages (reserves third for transport) and buys one large cage for the three of them. They’ve been content. Once he unlocks and opens the door, the three birds rush out to greet you, chirping happily. Meanwhile Gavin groans and covers his face with both hands.

 Once again, they’ve outsmarted him. Birds: a lot, Gavin: 0

 “Nice to see you too.” You give each of them scritches as you greet them.

 Gavin relieves you of Fiery and Icy who are annoyed they’re being taken away from you. Zappy cuddles against you, enjoying the attention you’re giving him.

 Gavin <3 Gavin <3 Gavin <3 Gavin <3 Gavin

 After acquiring your delivery bird and dropping him off at your apartment, you head over to the New Light Mall where you plan on meeting your partner in prank. Unfortunately, you’re not dealing with one little shit, but two of them. You feel something on top of your head and then comes that familiar chirping. 

 “Zappy, you’re really an escape artist.”

 Zappy happily replies as if to confirm your statement. They jump off your head down to your shoulder and snuggle against your neck. Since it’s more of a pain to go back home and put him in their cage, you let them be. More than likely, Zappy will escape again and again until you let them stay with you. They maneuver to underneath your hair. Silly bird.

 Your wait for Shaw is rather short.

 “I see you have that bird.” Shaw skateboards towards you. When he’s close, he hops off and does this weird trick where he flips his board so he can grab it.

 “He followed me,” you grumble. While you don’t mind them, you prefer they stay in their cage where you leave them. “Reminds me of you.”

 Shaw laughs. “You don’t say.” He reaches over to pet the bird who hesitantly accepts it. His expression is all too clear, the ‘I told you so’ one.

 “Let’s start from one end and work our way to the other,” you suggest. It means less walking, which your feet greatly appreciate.

 “Works for me.”

 Gavin <3 Gavin <3 Gavin <3 Gavin <3 Gavin

 Once you’ve finished your errands at the mall, you’re more than ready to go home except you have one last store and the most important one according to Shaw. However, you’re completely embarrassed to even think about going there. You have a feeling you’re going to be resembling a tomato until tomorrow at this rate. Your little stowaway doesn’t care where you go. You don’t think they’d be embarrassed by anything.

 “You can’t chicken out on me. I don’t know your size, and you’re not willing to tell me.” Point taken.

 You pull your hood over your head, dislodging Zappy in the process. They squawk before poking you with their rather sharp beak (not enough to break skin) to voice their displeasure. When you get to see them, their feathers are fluffed up and they’re glaring at you. They wait until you finish adjusting your hood before they crawl into it and settle between your neck and your hood.

 At least you know where they are and don’t have to chase them like at the mall where you had to chase them more than a few times. It takes bribing them with mandarin oranges to get them back to you. Good thing there’s a supermarket in the mall. You buy extras even if it means carrying those heavy cans. Actually you make Shaw carry them since he’s usually the main reason why you have to chase after that bird. Shaw grumbles and makes threats against Zappy, but he sees the little guy as a bird version of him. In fact, you swear they can be siblings… if they’re the same species.

 “Fine, let’s get this done and over with.” You really want to go home before you die of embarrassment or are mortified (petrified) in place. 

 Zappy keeps your neck warm the entire walk there. They’re like a little heater though not effective unless you’re trying to warm your hands or in this case your neck. Every now and then they poke their head out to see what’s making that noise. What a very curious little imp you have there. It makes you wonder how Gavin manages to deal with all three of them. You recall him mentioning this little one is the ring leader whenever they’re up to their shenanigans.

 Once you reach the door, you hesitate until a certain someone shoves you into the store. It turns out Shaw predicted your hesitation and made you go in first so he could give you a little push when you stall at the entrance. You stumble a little inside, causing Zappy to fall off their perch, but you manage to catch them in spite of your bags. They climb back up your arm before snuggling against your neck and chirp in appreciating of you saving them from a harsh meeting with the hard, unforgiving ground.

 Shaw grabs your hand and drags you to where they display the lingerie most men would like to see their women dressed in. He scans the racks as they have quite a selection of them. Anything that catches his eye would be pushed in front of you as he determines whether or not it would look good. They end up back on the racks as he doesn’t think it suits your complexion and/or figure. How would he know what you’re figure is considering you’re wearing baggy clothes, thanks to the weather. At least by now, it’s dark outside. You hope it’s enough to make you less conspicuous. It would help if they place your purchase in a plain bag with no store logo on it. Somehow you have the feeling they would.

 “Are you planning on looking through the entire lingerie section?” you ask as you reach in your hood to pet Zappy, who is more than happy to receive this attention. They say petting animals can calm a person. Right now, you need that calm before you strangle your accomplice in this prank.

 “If you had a better figure, I wouldn’t have to.” Now you’re tempted to throw a bag at him, but since you paid for it, you’d rather not waste it.

 You look beside you to find a cute pink lingerie and pick it up to inspect it. When you hear Shaw snort, you lower it to see him giving that disappointed look. “What?”

 “You want it to contrast with your skin, not blend in. What are you not thinking?”

 “I’m thinking I want to get this done and over with,” you grumble as you place it back. So pink and skin tones are out of the question. That’s when you see something shoved behind the lingerie Shaw vetoed. Reaching over, you somehow extricate it. Oh, it happens to be your size.

 Shaw sighs and is about to tell you not that pink lingerie, but stops when he notices you’re holding a red one. He tilts his head and then grabs it to place it before you. “This will do.”

 As he’s inspecting the garment, you notice a certain STF uniform. You can’t see who it is, but you’d rather play it safe than sorry. They know who you are thanks to you knowing a certain someone and being friends with his friend. Gossip travels faster than Shaw to his favorite band playing in a concert. You shove an unsuspecting Shaw behind the taller racks, hoping that the person hasn’t seen you and that they’d go away soon.

 Shaw squawks, but at least he hasn’t dropped the lingerie. “What is it?”

 “STF.”

 “It isn’t illegal to be in this shop,” Shaw points out.

 You counter with, “But you forget a certain someone will find out when word gets around.”

 Instead of giving you a complement, Shaw peers in the direction you’re looking. You both watch as that STF officer talking with someone who you don’t even know is as they’re standing in the shadows. When are they going to leave?

 Minutes go by.

 At last! They leave. You two scramble to the cashier who doesn’t question you about your odd behavior. Maybe it’s normal for people to hide in there? It’s better you don’t mention it at all. You pay using cash. Good thing they have ATMs at the mall since you were running low. You try not to keep that much on you as you don’t want to be a walking target. Since you’re with two living stun guns, your safety is assured. Zappy wouldn’t let anything happen to you as you spoil them along with the other birds, and Shaw needs some entertainment in his life which unfortunately happens to be you.

 When you see the nondescript bag being used, you let out a sigh of relief. The cashier doesn’t bat an eye. They’re probably used to this kind of behavior from new people. However, they raise a brow when they see the two of you together.

 “Something you’re not telling me?”

 Shaw rolls his eyes. It seems the two know each other. “Not what you think. She isn’t my type. I prefer messing with her and my brother.”

 “So you’re her advisor?”

 “She’d be completely lost without me.” Shaw leans close to that person. “Trying to seduce my idiot of a brother.”

 “I thought you hated each other.”

 Shaw shrugs. “He’s okay. We tolerate each other now.” He glances over to you. “A certain someone played therapist.” Gee thanks, Pikashaw. “And I get to mess with him.”

 “Nice. Good luck on seducing Gavin.” Just great, they know.

 Leaning forward, Shaw whispers something in their ear and both have impish grins. “I’ll let you know what happens.”

 “We have your favorite flavor in stock.”

 “I’ll grab some later.”

 The person reaches below the counter and pulls it up. “I came prepared. How many you want?”

 “I’ll take them all.” Shaw then tells the guy a size and requests double his usual.

 When he’s finished, you try to see what he bought, but he keeps it above your head, and you’re not about to jump on him to find out.  You’re tired and you’d have one unhappy Zappy, one unhappy combo. Not to mention, by now the little bird is most likely full, thus, not as easy to bribe. Well outside of finding something shiny they’d be interested in. A glittery ball (one that doesn’t have glitter glued on) will suffice. Alas, you’re short one glittery ball.

 After you arrive at your place, you’re both dead tired on your feet. You order take out to be delivered, and oddly enough Shaw is willing to fork over the money this time. With the exception of lunch, you paid for everything including Zappy’s bribes. Good thing Shaw doesn’t like to move when he’s tired. You’d rather not have to explain to your neighbor, Lucien, why you have male company who isn’t him or one of your employees.

 As you’re digging into your Chinese take-out, you feel something brush up against you. You’re first instinct is to scream, but your mouth is full of egg roll. Oh, it’s just Zappy who’s stealing a noodle from you. HEY! You doubt you’re supposed to feed them that since it’s probably not healthy, but something tells you that they most likely snag some from Gavin when he’s not looking, It’s just one noodle.

 On the other side of the table, Shaw laughs at the sight of the bird pilfering one of your noodles. Why don’t they grab one of his noodles? Since he paid for dinner, you let it slide. After you finish eating and throw out the empty containers, you plan on kicking Shaw out, but when you’re back from getting ready for bed, you see him out cold on your couch. Perched on top of his chest is a sleeping Zappy.

 Just this time, you’ll let him stay. After all, you don’t want to wake up the cute little bird.

 Day 1 <3 Day 1 <3 Day 1 <3 Day 1 <3 Day 1

 When you wake up this morning, you find Shaw organizing your purchases and nearby him are materials to wrap the gifts from you “secret admirer.” Next to him is a playful Zappy. They’re rolling around with one of those shiny bows. You figure Shaw threw it at them or let them have it to keep them entertained while he worked on the prank.

 “Morning.”

 “Chirp!” Zappy’s on their back with their legs holding the bow up. What an odd position, but the bird seems fine and isn’t panicking.

 “Breakfast is on the table.”

 You glance over in the direction of your kitchen. Did he cook something? You’re not sure how good of a cook he is, but you definitely know your culinary skills are much better than his.

 As if reading your mind, “I woke up early and got breakfast.”

 “Okay, who are you and what have you done with the real Shaw?”

 Shaw rolls his eyes. “I can wake up early if I have an incentive.”

 “And pray tell, what is the incentive?”

 “I get to mess with my brother.” Why doesn’t this surprise you?

 In addition to breakfast being on the table, you see he brewed a pot of coffee. You squash your giggles. The brothers are more alike than they care to admit. Breakfast is on the cold side, but it’s edible and tastes good. Coffee could use improvement on. At least he tried.

 Once you’ve changed in your room and grab what you need for work, you give Zappy some scritches which they want more of and leave a surprised Shaw a spare key to your apartment. You tell him it’ll be a pain if he keeps breaking in, and when he leaves to do whatever he does, you’d rather have your place secured. He can’t lock it from the outside.

 When you reach the spot, you find your ride nowhere in sight. You glance at your watch to find you’re actually early for a change, early by ten minutes. Normally you’re a patient person, but with this weather, you’d rather not be waiting outside. Three minutes after texting, your ride arrives.

 “Good morning, Gavin,” you greet him as he hands over the second helmet.

 “Morning,” Gavin replies. Something is bothering him like really bothering him. It’s not your place to poke your nose in his business. At the same time, you don’t like seeing him this way.

 The ride becomes awkwardly silent as neither of you know what to say other than your greetings. It’s as if you’ve gone back to square one. No matter, by the end of this week, he will definitely be happy. You’re sure of it.

 At your place, you hear your employees gossiping. Haven’t you given them enough work? Working and gossiping at the same time? Meh, you’ll deal with it. However, it’s the topic of their discussion that grabs your attention. A few of them move out of the way so you can get to your desk. On top of it, you see a very familiar package.

 “A gift? It isn’t my birthday,” you say pretending to be surprised.

 Kiki slides over to you and starts shaking you. “Open it. Open it!” She’s more excited than. Granted she has no idea about your plan.

 When you reach your desk, you notice the gift has been meticulously wrapped. Not a single crease or ribbon out of place though it’s a bit bent in a few areas due to delivery. You open the card first. In it, Shaw has written some sappy poem and signed it with Secret Admirer. Knowing your employees will not get any work done until you tell them, you read it out loud. A few catcalls and one shut up glare later, you’re tearing through the wrapping.

 “How did he know I’m running low on my favorite tea?” He doesn’t. You picked it yourself. Having received random gifts in the past, you take it in stride. The idea of it being poisoned doesn’t pop in your mind.

 “Oh wow, Boss,” Kiki whistles. “I bet it’s from Kiro. You two like the same stuff.”

 “I doubt it. He’s been too busy with work.” You decide to make yourself a cup. As you’re heading to the kitchen area, you realize the tea arrived before you did. Not to mention, Shaw was in the middle of getting it ready when you woke up.

 Oh right, messenger has wings so of course they’ll reach your work faster than you.

 When you return from making your tea, everyone scrambles to look busy. You know they’re very much curious about who your secret admirer is. Trying to ignore their stares is harder than it appears. How does Gavin do it?

 Time to enter the battlefield.

 Some time later, Willow calls for you. She doesn’t sound panic, more like confused.

 At the window, you find Zappy outside, tapping the window. No one has opened it. You open the window to let them in. They stay for a whole minute before high tailing it out of there. What they leave you is another package wrapped in a similar style as the tea.

 You pull out your phone to take a picture of it and then proceed to open it. As to why you hadn’t taken a picture of the previous present, it didn’t occur to you until now. After you read the cheesy romantic poem, you tear through the wrapping and reveal your favorite snack. Good timing too as it’s too early for lunch, but your stomach says it wants something. You (along with your employees) take a picture of it. As you’re nibbling on it, you make a post on moments and include the photo.

 By the end of the day (no need for OT yet), you’re gathering your belongings and ready to head home when you hear something run into a window. You (along with your employees) rush over to the window and find that same bird. Zappy appears to be fine, making you wonder if they purposely flew into the window.

 You open the window and go over the same process. This time it’s foreign chocolate. Wait a moment, this isn’t the one you picked up with Shaw. You wonder if the brat went out to buy something else. Nah, he’s too lazy to do it when there are acceptable options available to him.

 Now your entire office is buzzing. Perfect.

 Instead of Gavin coming to pick you up, it’s your big brother. “Lev! What’s up?”

 Levi crosses his arms over his chest. “Your last moments post.” Eh? “Those are the chocolates I bought you.”

 Aw crap, they looked familiar to you. “Ehehehehe. Funny you should mention that.” You break down and tell him your secret admirer plan.

 Instead of being angry or annoyed, Levi seems to be on board with this. He offers his help without being prompted or hinted. You hug him before you put on the helmet and hop onto his motorcycle.

 What’s up with guys and their motorcycles?

 Day 2 <3 Day 2 <3 Day 2 <3 Day 2 <3 Day 2

 Second day. Gotta hang in there and keep it a secret. When Shaw found out you told your other brother, he almost lost it, but you reassure him that your brother is on board with the plan. Now you have someone who can assist should you need it. Somehow you have the feeling you’ll need all the help you can get.

 An hour into work, a delivery person shows up with a bouquet of flowers. He asks for you since you’re the recipient. When you make yourself known, he hands over you the bouquet and an electronic device for you to sign it saying you’ve received the package.

 In this time, your employees gather around you, whispering and of course gossiping. They also pull out their cameras and are openly taking pictures of it. Are they paparazzi? You search for the card and read it out loud, the customary poem and signature. Thankfully you have the foresight to buy a vase to be delivered with it. After a moment arranging it on your desk, you take a picture for you moments post.

 Concentrating on your proposal, you forget you’re supposed to eat until another delivery person arrives. Instead of flowers, it’s your lunch. He hands you the bag and an envelope as if he does this on a regular basis. You tell him to wait a moment and tip him with a snack as you don’t have time to dig through your purse. Also, it looks like he could use something to eat. He thanks you for noticing it and heads on his way to his next delivery.

 By now everyone is crowded around you, you use your outdoor voice to tell them the latest poem except this time you leave out who sent it to you. They should know it’s from your secret admirer. After all, who has been giving gifts on a regular basis? Well yesterday.

 You, Kiki, and Willow have lunch together. It’s almost like a pot luck with the way you’re sharing your lunch. Both Kiki and Willow spend time trying to figure out who your secret admirer is. Kiki believe it’s Kiro while Willow says it’s from Gavin due to the poems. You remind them poetry is more of something Lucien would do. They have forgotten him.

 Close to the end of the day, you manage to have good timing when you look out the window and see that familiar yellow/black bird flying in your direction. You abruptly stand up, startling your employees and open the window. They stare at you until they too see that bird drop off your latest gift and leave.

 The same routine happens and you open your gift to find a cute cell phone case. “Oh wow, how does he know I have this model of phone?” you gasp in (what you hope) surprise.

 Willow frowns. “Your secret admirer knows a lot about you. You sure this person isn’t a stalker or something?”

 You wave her off. “I doubt a stalker would go through this.” Once you take a picture of the case, you replace your old one with it. Then you upload the picture onto moments.

 Day 3 <3 Day 3 <3 Day 3 <3 Day 3 <3 Day 3

 “Hey Boss,” Minor says hesitantly as if you’re going to attack him. Or maybe it’s Gavin.

 “Yes?”

 “Bro is upset. I mean really upset. Haven’t seen him this way since… high school.”

 “Which bro are you talking about?” Your question reminds him that you have a bro, and that he should specify which one when referring to them.

 “Gavin.”

 This worries you as it’s way too early. “He hasn’t done anything, has he?”

 Minor shakes his head. “I mean I like hanging out with him and all, but all he does is sulk or rant about your secret admirer.”

 “He’s not drinking?”

 “I offered him a can, but he refused. He takes his job seriously.” Minor sounds proud of Gavin as if they’re father and son instead of being high school friends.

 You lean closer to Minor. “Whatever you do. Do NOT give him alcohol unless you want your New Year’s bonus to disappear.”

 “Yes, ma’am.”

 “And no telling Gavin I told you this.”

 Minor gulps. “I’ll try.”

 When you return from making your morning tea, you find that tea set, sitting on your desk. How Zappy delivered it without breaking anything leaves you confounded. You scurry over to your desk and open your gift. The rustling draws the attention of your employees. After removing the last piece of wrapping, you hold it up as high as you dare to show everyone. Unlike the other gifts, the note is in the tea pot. You open it since you hadn’t seen any note. Where is Shaw getting all these poems? You don’t think he’s into poetry.

 Then it dawns on you… big bro is helping.

 Anna brings order to the office as she ushers everyone back to work. “How many presents have you received?”

 You start ticking off each one. “I think this is the seventh.”

 She shakes her head. “Don’t lead him on. If you’re not interested, tell him.”

 “Uh… how am I supposed to tell him when I have no clue who he is?” You’d give yourself a pat on the back for that superb performance if it wouldn’t look foolish as no one would have a clue as to why you’re congratulating yourself, and you’d rather not them questioning your sanity… what’s left of it once you and Shaw finish this plan.

 When you open your moments, you notice a number of replies. In fact, this is the highest number you’ve received ever since you started the account. It’s what you don’t see that starts worrying you. In all your posts, Gavin has yet to make a comment. You know that he knows, thanks to Minor blabbering to you.

 What sounded like a good idea at the time is now sounding like a horrible one. You don’t want to see Gavin this depressed or crushed. It’s almost the halfway point. You can do this. You just hope the other two birds can keep Gavin’s spirits from sinking way down. Sure, Pearly is cute and cuddly, but he doesn’t pick up on emotions like the other two do.

 You text your big brother asking him if this is the right thing and that you’re questioning yourself whether it’s a good idea or not. His quick response doesn’t surprise you by now. You’re used to it. He tells you it’s like going to get a shot at the doctors or pulling off a bandage. The thought of what’s to come is worse than the actual act. You thank your big brother. He always knows what to say to encourage and support you even if it’s something you regret much later on.

 Lunch is delivered and served from a fancy restaurant. The chef herself has put on a performance for you as she prepares your meal. Your coworkers look on in awe by the way she moves her cooking utensils and the food goes where it’s supposed to go, not flying all over the place. At the end of her performance, she hands you the card with the cheesy, romantic poem.

 Your female employees are gushing over how you have a very generous and thoughtful secret admirer as he’s giving the stuff you like. Not to mention, he isn’t cheap either and going all out for you. You laugh nervously, saying that one day you hope you can see who likes you enough to go out of his way. The girls swoon over the thought and their vision of what/who he is.

 The next delivery is a simple envelope via Zappy. When you show what you receive, they’re clearly disappointed and go back to working except for those two and Anna. You open it to reveal a coupon for a complete massage package at the trendy massage parlor. When Kiki squeals in excitement, your other employees snap their attention back to you and gather around you. This has become quite normal.

 “So what are you planning to do?” Kiki asks as if you’re planning to give it away, and she hopes you’d pick her.

 “Go after work. I haven’t been sleeping well.” Your thoughts drift over to Gavin and how he’s coping with all this.

 “Aww…”

 You chuckle before tapping her on her head with the envelope. “Last time I checked, it’s addressed to me.”

 “This secret admirer must want you badly.” Willow whistles. “They only have the highest quality service and equipment.”

 Anna gives you that look, but at the same time, you promised not to tell anyone else. “Kids these days.” She sighs and heads to wherever she is before your envelope arrived.

 Day 4 <3 Day 4 <3 Day 4 <3 Day 4 <3 Day 4

 That was one of your best night of sleep ever since you could remember. Ever since the first day, your big brother has been playing chauffeur. He doesn’t mind since he can arrange his work schedule around to fit yours and has assured you many times that you’re not a burden to him. In fact, he’d be quite troubled should you ask someone else to drive you to and from work.

 You hear bits and pieces of a conversation you’re not supposed to be a part of. It’s not that you’re trying to eavesdrop. More like, your entrance isn’t noisy so they don’t know you’re here. You frown when you piece together the info.

 When you appear, they cease their conversation and act as if nothing has happened. You decide to let them off with a warning this time.

 “There will be no gambling here so you can stop wagering on who is sending me these gifts.” Your employees groan and grumble, but they comply with your wishes or at least they appear to. You hadn’t thought this far ahead. As for Shaw, you’re not sure he has even considered this.

 When you reach your desk, you find a small jewelry box. Unlike the other gifts, it’s not nicely wrapped but placed in a see through bag for transport. You read off the poem. The first part of today’s gift is a pair of earrings.

 “Oh my, he is serious,” Anna says as she looks over your shoulder.

 “I’d answer only if I had someone to give that answer to.”

 Anna gives you a supportive smile. “I know. You’re not the type of person to play with someone’s emotions.” She heads to her desk.

 Hearing her say those words, you start feeling guilty. Are you playing with Gavin’s emotions? You’re not stringing him along as you’re trying to get him to ask you. The easiest way is to go up and tell him to his face, but as they say, easier said than done.

 Willow leans back in her chair. “Why are you moping around? You have a very generous and wealthy secret admirer.”

 You sigh a long one. “I just don’t want to be seen as taking advantage of his generosity.” Yeah right, you paid for all of these.

 “Then he should grow a pair and tell you how he feels.” You know Willow is on your side no matter what you do and that includes the amateur mistakes you made when you first started. Not to mention, Kiki and Anna feel the same way. As for Minor, you’d rather not have him choose between you and Gavin.

 “I hope he does soon. For my sanity.”

 “And for Bro’s too,” Minor chimes in the conversation.

 Everyday you’ve brought your own lunch even though you know you’re going to be receiving something from your secret admirer. If you brought your meals on the days you’re not going to have food delivered, then it would appear suspicious. As you’re about to tear into your sandwich, you hear a familiar chirping. You grab a mandarin orange, hiding it in your hand and head over to the window where an expectant Zappy is waiting with your gift. Positioning yourself between you and the bird, you use the hand with the orange to reach over and grab the parcel. However, you let Zappy grab the orange and let them take off.

 “What is it?”

 “Calm down, I’m opening it.” True to your word, you read the poem and open the jewelry box to reveal a matching bracelet. By now everyone knows the drill. They gather around you taking pictures. However, you decide not to post anything in moments as you know certain people are following you.

 “I bet you’re going to get a necklace,” Kiki giggles from her seat to which you roll your eyes.

 “We’ll see.”

 Hours later, that necklace arrives. Kiki gives the ‘I told you so’ look. You two tease each other for a few minutes. Now that you think about it, she’s like a sister you never had, a younger sister. Maybe this is how Levi feels towards you. It takes Willow pulling on her ear to get her back working until you all call it a day and head home.

 “Having second or third thoughts?” Your big brother asks when you approach him.

 “Yeah. I just wish he’d do something, but he hasn’t contacted once,” you grumble and take his place behind him on his bike. Of course, you wear a helmet.

 “Oh he’s been doing something all right,” Levi says though he doesn’t start his bike. “He’s been bothering me about who your secret admirer is. He believes you tell me everything.” Yeah, while you do tell him a lot, it’s not everything.

 “Did you tell him?”

 “I told him to ask you directly.”

 Phew.

 Day 5 <3 Day 5 <3 Day 5 <3 Day 5 <3 Day 5

 When nothing arrives for you in the morning, your employees are greatly disappointed. Don’t they have something like work to do? You suppose it has been their entertainment for this otherwise boring week, and they need something to help them get through it.

 “Everyone!” Anna yells over their chatter. After it becomes quiet, she continues. “Courtesy of our boss’ secret admirer, we have lunch!”

 Your employees cheer and anyone close to you thanks you for having such an awesome secret admirer. Some even tell you to keep this person. You’re relieved when they don’t ask any questions. Between you and Anna you organize how the lunch is to be distributed. There will be four different groups, going at staggered times to pick up their meals. When the current group is almost finished, you call for the next group to line up and begin. It’s like one of those buffets or pot lucks where people fall in line and then pick up what they want.

 Later that afternoon, you hear a thud and a squawk at the window. You rush over since you know who made that noise and find a very tired Zappy on top of a very large box. Poor little guy. You pick up the bird and take them in, leaving the box for now. Once they’re at your desk, you go back for the box. It’s heavier than you thought. No wonder why Zappy struggled to fly it over.

 “I knew it. That bird looks exactly like bro’s,” Minor announces to the entire office. He reaches over only to pull his hand back when the bird snaps at him. “Maybe not. Zappy’s nicer.”

 You keep the window open for when the delivery bird feels ready to make the trip back to your apartment where you know Shaw has been hanging out lately. He claims he doesn’t want to haul your gifts to his place and would rather crash at yours. You’re annoyed at first, but then realize, it’s more practical for him to stay there with you, the gifts, and the bird.

 “Boss, do you even know how to use it?” Kiki asks as she reads the side of the box. This isn’t wrapped, and instead of being in an envelope, your poem along with signature has been taped to one side.

 Your eye twitches. “That’s why they come with instruction manuals.”

 “How many instruction manuals have read and understood?” Trust those two to give you a hard time. They’re not doing it maliciously. It’s more on teasing in a good way. Like you’re three sisters.

 “Youtube.”

 They both sport this ‘oh’ look as if they practiced doing it in synch. You guess you’ve been around each other long enough that your small habits have rubbed off on each other.

 “And here I was going to share the candy with you.”

 The two become much more friendly and helpful. When you open it, they’ll help you use it… at your place on the weekend.

 Zappy is too tired to fly back, and you hide them until everyone has left. Then you call your big brother up to your company and have him carry down the candy making machine while you carry the little bird. On your way, you give a slight nod of your head to the security guards who do a double take when they see your little bundle. By now, they’re used to having your big brother come and go from your work place. It also helps he’s on friendly terms with them.

 Instead of his bike, Levi brings his truck along with Shaw and Zappy’s cage. You hand over the exhausted bird to Shaw before hoisting yourself into the front passenger seat. Then you notice the gift you’re supposed to be wearing and the other items to set the mood.

 Your next stop is Gavin’s place. It dawns on you that you don’t have a key to his apartment. How are you supposed to enter his apartment without one? You glance over to Shaw and then your big brother. It seems they have it planned out or so you hoped.

 When you reach Gavin’s apartment, Levi pulls out what looks to be a lock picking set. He gets to work on the door. A few seconds later, you hear the sound of a door being unlocked.  He gives you a cheeky grin. “Bet you didn’t know I could do this.”

 “You never told me.”

 “You never asked.”

 Levi apologizes for driving you there and running. He has an appointment with a client. You’re grateful he at least brings up Zappy’s cage. He tells you he’ll drop by your place after to deliver your candy making machine.

 Shaw shrugs. “He demanded I give him your spare key.”

 Right. You thank every deity Levi has taken things into his own hands and got your spare key back. Knowing the brat, you figure he’d give you a hard time for awhile and then let you have it. It occurs to you he may have created a duplicate. You’ll ask your landlord if you can change locks later at your expense. Your landlord can be a real piece of work, but if you’re offering to cover the expenses and the request is within reason, he’ll give it the green light.

 You place Zappy back into their cage with the other two who are very worried for their companion. The birds start chirping up a storm. You have no clue what they’re talking about and figure they’re catching up on whatever they missed. Not like Icy and Fiery have anything interesting to say except for how Gavin has been behaving lately.

 Shaw takes out your lingerie. “You get changed. I’ll set up here.”

 Since you’ve been there quite a few times, you know your way around even without any lights. You can walk around there in your sleep for crying out loud. “Thanks for everything.”

 Instead of replying with ‘You’re welcome,’ Shaw motions for you to get going and rifles through the bag for something.

 Once in the bathroom, you realize you’re not sure how to put on this lacy garment without accidentally ripping it. You were too embarrassed to ask the person who sold it to you, Shaw’s friend… acquaintance. Turning it around and around gives you no clue how to don it. As you become frustrated, you take a deep breath. What did you say about Youtube? Oh yes.

 Good thing you take your phone with you and start searching for instructions on how to put the thing on. You find something, but it’s not on the website you thought you’d find it. As you’re following it step by step, you see something off. Oh Shaw has removed all the tags. How thoughtful of him… when he wants to be. You swear he does most of the things on purpose to get a reaction of you.

 Since you’d rather not rip it before you have a chance to actually wear it, you go through the motions slowly and handle the lacy gently. With the tags removed, there goes any chance of returning or exchanging it. You swear it should come with a set of instructions on how to wear it.

 You look at yourself in the mirror and turn around to make sure you have everything where it needs to go, not that there’s much in the way of fabric or lace. This is for Gavin so it has to be perfect. He’s given so much to you and you want to show how much you appreciate him. You squash your rising feeling of guilt for what you’ve most likely him through these past… four and a half days. This day isn’t over so it doesn’t count as a full day.

 Seeing everything in order, you blush as you think about how Gavin would respond. Would he be a stuttering and blushing mess? Tripping over his words? Or would he be like a hungry wolf ready to pounce on his prey? It brings up memories of when you dressed as Little Red Riding Hood while he was the Big Bad wolf for your Halloween party. You’re not the only couple who came dressed as a set. Kiki and her boyfriend came as Cinderella and Prince Charming while Minor and Willow as Snow White and her Prince. Before the party, you decided to go with a fairytale theme.

 When you pick up your phone, you notice how much time has passed. You place your hand on the knob ready to exit, but… do you want Shaw to see you like this? Maybe you can cover yourself with your jacket until he leaves. No, that won’t work as he needs to help you arrange yourself on Gavin’s bed. That means he’ll have to eventually see you wearing it.

 “Here goes nothing.”

 As you open the door, you involuntarily hold your breath. Your body reminds you to breathe once you step out of it. “Shaw, we need to hurry up!” With your attention on carrying your clothes and cell phone, you miss seeing something important.

 That is until…

 “Shaw, what the hell are you doing with her?”

 This voice could only belong to… Gavin. You raise your head to see Gavin on the verge of strangling his own brother who was trying to fight back the tears… no, laughter.

 “This isn’t what it looks like!”

 Gavin’s eyes drop onto the bed where Shaw has laid thick ribbon, a bow, a flower, and a pair of fuzzy handcuffs. Then his gaze moves over to you and your huge blush.

 “SHAW! When did you get this?” You point to the fuzzy handcuffs. The ribbon, bow, and flower, you already know about it. But that adult toy is something you’ve never laid eyes upon until now.

 “You two are boring. I’m spicing things up between you two so sue me.” Shaw shrugs as if it’s an everyday occurrence to break into a brother’s place with someone who likes him and that kind of toy.

 Gavin frowns before he slams Shaw into the nearest wall. Good thing they’re not far away from it. “You…”

 Instead of being upset or angry, Shaw starts laughing hysterically as if he’s lost his mind. You stare at him as if he’s grown an extra appendage. On the other hand, Gavin is too furious to care.

 “Date. Date. Date. Date.” Since none of you are talking and no one else should be in the apartment, you and Gavin start scanning his room for the source. Meanwhile Shaw is laughing so hard he looks like he’s crying. If isn’t for his older brother, you swear he’d kiss the floor by now.

 As soon as the chanting resumes, you and Gavin stare in disbelief. Never in either of your wildest imaginations (and you have a very active one) did you think any of these birds can speak, but here they are chanting one word. Date.

 With Shaw out of the picture (laughing), Gavin turns to you for an explanation and when he really gets a good look at you, he too resembles a tomato. He averts his gaze to anywhere except you.

 After taking take a deep breath, you somehow manage to get your feet moving over to him. You place your hands on his arm as if reassuring him. “Nothing is going between us.” You point to Shaw and then to yourself. “Promise.”

 “Then why is he here and you’re wearing… that.”

 Shaw manages to calm himself down to where he can speak. “My idiot of a brother needed to grow a pair of balls.”

 “What did you say?” Gavin pushes him back into the wall.

 “Man up.”

 “….”

 “Isn’t it obvious why she’s doing this?”

 “…. No.”

 “She wants you to fuck her.”

 “SHAW!” You’re tempted to slap him, but with the way the two brothers are positioned, you’re not tall enough to reach over and give him a smack.

 “All right. All right. Since you’re too much of a coward, she needed to take drastic measures.”

 “You’re not the secret admirer?”

 Shaw snorts. “There never was one.”

 “Then how… what… those gifts.”

 “I bought them and Shaw helped me send them to myself,” you finally admit. “Are you mad at me?”

 Gavin exhales in relief, all that pent up anxiety and frustration released at once, now that he knows you never had a secret admirer. At the same time, he’s a little annoyed. “But why him?”

 “Err… he knows you better than I do.” You hope this will suffice. It does to a certain extent.

 “Now that you know, you can let go.”

 “Why should I?”

 “You plan on going on a date with her holding me like this?” Shaw motions to the two of them.

 “No. Why didn’t you tell me?”

 You puff up your cheeks. “For the same reasons why you didn’t ask me.”

 Conflicting emotions appeared in those amber eyes. “I see.”

 “Great, now that you two lovebirds have made up, you can release me.” Shaw pauses. “I left you a little surprise under the pillow.

 Curiosity gets the better of you and you reach over to yank the pillow off. What you reveal causes your blush to intensify, Gavin to become a stuttering mess, and Shaw to laugh hysterically again. You hastily shove the pillow back over the items, wanting them to disappear.

 “Gavin, I—”

 You notice Gavin on the move still holding a hysterically laughing Shaw. You follow him until he reaches the entrance and literally throws his brother out. He slams the door with a little too much force, causing the walls to rattle along with your nerves. You gulp.

 Man, you’re in big trouble.

 The loud pounding on the door diverts both your attention. “I forgot to mention. I left a book in the bag. You’ll need it for tonight.”

 “The bag” happens to be on a table close to Gavin. He reaches over to open it and then closes it immediately.

 All three birds wolf whistle and make suggestive chirps. At least they’re out here and not in the bedroom. You open your mouth to say something when you’re swept off your feet and carted off to his bed.

 Gavin uses his weight to pin you. “A little bunny has been very naughty.”

[smilesthroughfandoms]

Random List of things I want from episodes of Hazbin Hotel (and Helluva Boss) when it gets greenlit cause we all know it will

Mimzy, Baxter, and Crymini joining the hotel. Think that's a pretty obvious one.

Mimzy and Alastor backstory, I know that info on Mimz being in love with Al is probably outdated but I think it would be fun if they still at least knew each other in life. (Were the friends? How close were they? Did Al fucking kill Mimzy, if so was it an accident or on purpose?) The sky’s the limit here!

On that note: Backstories on how each mortal soul involved in the Hotel ended up in Hell. Especially people who (for now) it’s kinda tricker to imagine why/how they ended up in Hell in the first place. I’m namely thinking of Vaggie and Niffty. Vaggie is a little more believable cause of her apparent reliance on weapons the first sign of trouble. But Niffty is a sweet little sugar bean who I imagine is legally forbidden from saying bad words. 

I’d like to see why Niffty ended up in a Hell cause I'm a sucker for the “Cinnamon Roll is actually Deadly Murder Baby” trope, don't judge me.

Royal Family Backstory! How did Lucifer and Lillith meet? How did they acquire their stations? When was Charlie born and how did this affect hell’s demographics, particularly in the realization that “Shit, some of us can create kids here”

Also, what other biblical figures are canon in Hazbin Hell? We already saw Stolas (though I’m still unsure if he’s the Stolas in bible or this is just, like, an avatar or version of him or something). Is Beezlebub in Hell? 

What about historical figures? Jeffery Dahmer and probably Lizzie Borden (that ax chick from Charlie’s song). Is Hitler in Hell? What about Vlad the Impaler or John Wayne Gacy?

I want Lucifer to be voiced by Weird Al. No, I will not explain or apologize for this wish.

More musical numbers!

Valentino backstory and his relationship to Angel Dust (Ik Vivz said this would be explained more in those comics but c’mon, it’d be a cool episode too).

Rosie, Vox, and other overlord backstories. I also wanna know who that cute overlord girl was with Vox and Val in the opening. She’s so cute and looks fun.

Vaggie and Alastor team up for some reason. I know they don’t really like or trust one another but I think they could play well off each other. Also character building.

Angel Dust and Charlie team up as well. Maybe a subplot to the above. More character development!

Sir Pentious, Cherri Bomb, and the Egg bois join the Hotel because why not and it’d be fun.

Angel gets a boyfriend. Cherri gets a girlfriend. 

Chaggie moments. I want their relationship to be shown in the same way Moxxie and Millie’s relationship was.

Who are the Von Eldritch family? Why to Helsa and Charlie not get along? Who is the son and why did he and Charlie break-up? What did their parents think of this? How does Vaggie (if at all) factor into this?

An episode where they focus on all the background characters in Hell (kinda like that one episode of Gumball).

Angel telling Val where to stick it being framed as him finally, seriously, giving redemption a shot.

Alastor and Vox fight framed like a big anime showdown no I will not apologize for this either, deal with it.

ALASTOR FROWNING!!!!!!

NIffty having a habit of saying really dark, morbid, depressing, horrifying things in the bubbliest, happiest voice in all of Hell. Everyone is kinda unnerved by it.

Husk is an odd combo of Rick Sanches and Grunkle Stan.

Baxter making inventing or “creating” something that destroys something in the Hotel off-screen. It becomes a running gag.

A running gag of Alastor literally shoving anyone out of the way to talk to Charlie.

Mimzy somehow becoming the mom friend despite being terrible at it.

This kind of conversation: Angel Dust: What’re you doing? Crymini: Teenage Rebellion. Angel: Fuq yeah, stick it to the old people!

An episode where Sir Pentious tries to destroy the Hotel and goes whole ham to do it... but no one in the Hotel ever notices his schemes or accidentally thwarts him without even trying,

Tom bitch slapping Katie. He deserves too.

Are there other religions in this universe? Did God and Lucifer inadvertently kick out all the old-timey deities in their rise to power?

Are any of said deities or mythological characters in Hell? Do they like it there? Do they deserve it? Again, sky’s the limit

A crossover with Helluva Boss

Or at least references back and forth.

Blitzo and Stola’s relationship played with more, but not necessarily Blitzo ending up with Stolas. Although if Stolas has good character development I could change my mind

More Moxxie and Millie relationship. They’re so cute!

Baby Loona and Blitzo adopting Loona. That is all.

That bratty kid becoming a sitcom archnemesis for I.M.P. but no one taking it seriously.

Stolas and Blitzo busting their asses off to keep whatever they have a secret from Stolas’s wife. But she knows, she has known for a long time (Blitz did tell her that first time) and she actively encourages is because hey, she’s sleeping with someone else besides her husband. Stolas and Blitzo’s reaction can vary.

Moxxie, Millie, and Loona memeing on Blitzo whenever Stolas calls. Like, yeah, they don’t like Stolas much either, but still, Blitz kinda had it coming.

Stolas gets a musical number. But not a good one. More on the lines of this. 

On that note, maybe something like a Starkid musical episode? C’mon, it fits.

I want Charlie and Stolas to know each other. Not friends but at least they know each other. Royalty and all...

Blitzo family backstory? Who are those ladies in the poster with him? Was he actually in a circus? How did the O become silent in his name?

Stolas’s daughter, Natasha (or Tasha, whatever) shows up. Maybe she’s the spoiled, bratty, daddy’s little girl trope. OR EVEN BETTER: She’s a mix of E.B. from the Netflix Green Eggs and Ham and Louise from Bob’s Burgers. Let her be smart! Let her start working for I.M.P. and run it better than any of them.

Tasha actually has a strong moral compass and actually kinda likes Charlie’s idea and wants to help, but she’s a kid and her dad says she can’t so... (She probably does anyway or Charlie tells Tasha to come back and help when she’s a bit older and has more freedom from her parents.

Blitzo and Angel Dust meeting, tell me that wouldn’t kick ass. (And Stolas meeting Angel Dust and getting “I’m here to steal yo man” vibes from him). Whether Angel and Blitzo hit it off that way is completely arbitrary.

A crossover of Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss culminating in the entire crew having to defeat some big baddie and it kicks ass.

More found family tropes in general. That’s the good shit.

That’s all I got for now. Feel free to reblog and add on!

[kathyprior4200]

Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss: Potential Finale

Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss: The Final Episodes

 2025

 The Second Heaven Hell War has begun! Charlie attempts to redeem her clients at the hotel and after several fights against Helsa, Vox, Valentino, Velvet and Katie Killjoy, she has successfully done so. Unfortunately, Heaven is not so keen to let sinners into Heaven unless they do the impossible and become saints. The angels also are elitist, only wanting the virtuous into Heaven to not overcrowd their realm. Charlie pleads with the Archangels to give them a chance, to have Angel Dust, Alastor, Husk and Niffty reunite with their Heaven families (Molly, Alastor’s mother, etc.) Meanwhile, I.M.P struggles to kill more bad mortals as C.H.E.R.U.B. keeps reviving them.

 Some people in Hell (Three Vs, Alastor, Rosie, Lucifer, The Seven Ring Rulers) attempt to keep their status at all costs. Alastor attempts to control and slaughter more demons, angels and humans, before Charlie helps him discover what he truly wants: entertainment, love and finding his mother. After long hard battles and agreements, Angel Dust is free from Valentino and a redeemed Alastor lets Husk and Niffty go. Rosie, Helsa (who wants Charlie’s position as princess) and the Hell-born attempt to keep the lower class sinners in line, joining with the Three Vs to try and shut down Charlie’s hotel (Lucifer’s idea.) Vox and Valentino try and brainwash Hell into watching TV and buying into Valentino’s porn. Angel and Aracknis confront their stern mafia father. Baxter, Crymini, Mimzy and the Hazbins work together to defeat them. Vaggie and Charlie grow closer after a formerly love-struck Charlie finds out that Alastor betrayed the hotel for his own purposes. After Alastor betrays them, he realizes that they were his only friends and decides to make it up to Charlie (by apologizing and helping the Hazbins defeat the Overlords.)

 I.M.P. goes on adventures throughout the Seven Rings and Stolas bonds deeper with his daughter and Blitzo. However, I.M.P. makes one fatal mistake, leading the humans to suspect that demons and angels are out there. Alastor jumps at the chance to enter the human world and cause more chaos (before he is redeemed). Charlie and the others stop him and bring him back to Hell.) C.H.E.R.U.B. tries to make friends with I.M.P., telling them to stop killing, but they don’t listen, saying it’s their only way to survive in a world that sees them as dirt. The cherubs rely the info to Gabriel and Michael, who send more angel spies to crack down on demons. Ironically, the humans accept C.H.E.R.U.B., even worship them as mini deities in their desires to constantly be revived. However, their revival results in more human population and formerly deceased criminals being able to cause trouble once again. The fight over humanity between angels and demons is ongoing! Could saints (former humans in Heaven) and sinners (former humans in Hell) be the realm mediators led by Charlie?

 Lucifer tells Charlie to stop pursuing her fruitless dream, as it is tradition to have Exorcists kill demons every year. Charlie refuses to do so. Lucifer warns her that Heaven will find out and she’ll be in danger. (He had wanted to protect her as well as make her into a worthy heir). Lucifer explains that he made an agreement with his brother, that Lucifer could rule Hell as he saw fit but only if the Exorcists do their job to instill fear and to reduce the population. Charlie and Lilith suspect that it’s a tactic to keep them in line, to say “you sinners deserve to suffer and die.” Lilith forms an army of performers in secret while Charlie continues her work. Baxter creates armor and chemical weapons for the demons, working with Cherri Bomb and Sir Pentious. More Exorcists arrive, this time killing twice as many demons as before as a warning. But the next time, Charlie and Hell’s rebellion would be ready. Lucifer confronts Michael who tries to pacify Charlie into letting the angels decide the fate of demons.

The second Heaven Hell War soon begins. Lucifer, Lilith and Charlie led the Infernal Rebellion, while God, Adina, Michael and Jesus lead the Heavenly Order. I.M.P. and C.H.E.R.U.B. join the fight as well. Exorcists fly in by the hundreds, fighting off demons who now have weapons, technology and magic powers. The war takes place mostly in Hell, but extends to Heaven and Earth. Lucifer battles Michael, as Lucifer attempts to take God’s throne again. Lilith and Charlie work to defeat Adina and the consort of God, who doesn’t want to fight. The Archangels battle the Overlords and the Seven Ring Rulers…for the first time, Hell’s denizens work together to survive. However, some angels are good and agree to Charlie’s plan, thus join her. While a few evil demons become influenced by Adina and a desire for more power. But soon, many beloved characters die their second deaths.

 “When the seven Rings collapse, when the Heavens crash aground”

Before long, Heaven and Hell start to crumble. Both strict hierarchies fall as the evil Ring Rulers are stripped of their status. The only way to escape was to go to the human world. Stolas sacrifices himself for Octavia and to keep the portal open long enough for the remaining demons and angels to enter. Charlie and the others arrive to the human world but not everyone makes it. All the demons put on their human form disguises and their backstories are revealed! Alastor reconciles with his mother, Mimzy, Niffty Husk and Charlie, giving her a kiss. Angel hugs his mother, brother and sister. Those who survive finally get to see their families.

  But now the terrified humans have discovered them and are off to hunt down all the demons! They demand them to perish and get off of Earth, though many mortals want to use demons and angels alike to do their bidding. The demons, having been dead, chaotic and from different time periods… they wouldn’t mesh well with current humanity (the world would end!). Charlie tries to reassure the mortals that her kind are only there to help them and live peacefully among them, that they now need a new home. God decides to create a hidden Safe Haven for the characters (similar/the same to Zoophobia!) It isn’t Charlie’s original idea of Heavenly paradise, but as the angels and demons try to work together, it makes her happy all the same. Of course, the demons mourn the loss of their home and comrades. I.M.P and C.H.E.R.U.B. still try to kill and revive humans but soon find other musical theater callings. I.M.P. become excellent slayers of monsters in the other Hell as well as great performers. C.H.E.R.U.B. alternatively become healers of those in new Safe Haven and still travel to the human world to spread hope…while agreeing to let the natural cycle take its course. Charlie’s plan had (nearly) succeeded!

 But it wasn’t over. God, Charlie and the powerful authorities use the last of their powers to create Purgatory and the Astral Realm. Along with the new Hotel, Charlie leads the Purgatory rehabilitation program, where souls face their worst fears and themselves, giving them a second chance. As a consequence for switching worlds, the demons and angels could die mortal deaths (and could only use their diminished powers in their hidden sanctuary). All souls now entered the vast Purgatory world with five choices: go to Zoophobia’s Hell or Heaven, die a natural final death, be reincarnated into the mortal realm, or…like Charlie and her friends eventually do…be redeemed and enlightened in a new starry paradise.

 And so the next generation of Viv’s world begins…with I.M.P. and the Hazbins merging with Zoophobia and Ashley Nichol’s world of Far Fetched. Any children the characters have could either go to the alternate Zoophobia academy or help an aging future Charlie (before she obtains enlightenment) with another larger hotel to redeem others.

[idealnreal]

Please overanalyze the shadows in his palace I am begging you.

@appleyjuiceboy​ / jester owns my braincells of course i would do this for u

Okay so i think its best if i go about the order of shadows we meet in the game so. I’m not going to go into the persona/shadows in maruki’s palace. I’ll leave that for some other day. Now! Lets hope i can remain fully coherent.

1) The fluffy haired noodle shadow we meet for (ka)sumi’s awakening

First off, look at the design of this shadow--it has the fluffy hair parted to the right like maruki, its androgynous figure, and that swirly face mask as well! The mask has two eyes, and it even looks like theres a smile there, lopsided. 

We have never seen any other palace shadow taking a similar shape as the palace ruler (except maybe the yaldaboath palace). Shadows are meant to emulate what the ruler thinks of as protectors of their heart. Maruki doesn’t trust anyone other than himself with this secret. And particularly at this phase of his distortion -- there are no scientists, to attendants, no patients. Just an empty, beautiful palace -- with possibly only one type of shadow and protector. The type that represents himself. 

(Also androgynous/nb maruki confirmed ?? yes)

Okay then lets look at what this shadow says to Kasumi.

Shadow: ... Heresy. You dare to spurn our lord’s mercy. Accept yourself... Our lord laments the foolishness birthed from your pain.

Having the context that Kasumi is Sumire here ... Because this scene comes about because Kasumi sees a cognitive version of herself (Sumire) blaming herself -- and so, a part of her is probably trying to remember that she is Sumire. Thus ‘spurn(ing) our lord’s mercy’. And yeah accepting herself as Kasumi instead of trying to remember that she is Sumire. 

But most important is the fact that Maruki’s palace shadows refer to him as a religious or god-like being (’our lord’s mercy’ calling back christian themes). Someone who is merciful and, most of all, does feel grief over one’s pain. Painting an ideal picture of a loving and caring god, ala abrahamic religions. This is a running theme with all the shadow’s dialogs. Let’s put a pin in this for now. 

These design shadows are seen again later in the container room of the palace. They’re slightly faster. The container room is a strange one -- because it doesn’t quite fit in with the rest of the laboratory/hospital/garden of eden thing going on.  While yes labs and hospitals do have storage areas, i cant imagine them being a container warehouse like this. I do headcanon that this is a storage area for the pain and suffering that Maruki has taken on from other people in order to heal them, due to his hyper empathy -- but i’ll analyse the room some other time. For now it’s interesting that the Maruki-like shadows are now relegated to this specific and really dark section of the palace.

Like the throne room/centre of eden that the Maruki boss fight takes place in -- He resigns himself to the darker gloomier parts of his palace. And the same goes for these shadows. This is where he belongs. 

Also abso-fucking-lutely we’re going to talk about how this shadow transforms when it ambushes you:

Skin suit opening up to reveal fangs and rows of teeth, and a formless monster inside. Maruki ... dude ... are you okay? If these shadows are meant to emulate him -- is this how he sees himself sometimes? HHh boy...

2) First lab coat wearing shadow at the start of his palace investigation

Prior to this, while we understood that Maruki was a researcher, it was never a defining feature of him. Like the first thing that came to my mind on Maruki was that he was just the school counsellor and snack purveyor. Now this entire researcher, scientist, side of him is in full display. And this is the most common type of shadow we see, some which are violent, and others are non violent. Maruki sees scientists as the main residents of his palace -- his drive towards investigation and discovery, to puzzling out the intricacies of the human heart, human mind, and human pain. To better further his ability to heal. But there’s also a sort of cold, methodical nature to these scientists. Their ‘healing’ is methodical, based in science.

This coupled with the religious reverence and ideology that their dialog suggests, is a nice contrast. Experiments, data, research, are people’s salvation. Not the simple belief of a deity or of a higher purpose -- but science. Science, in many ways, becomes part and parcel of their religious belief.

Shadow: Those guises ... You aren’t among those who desire salvation. Leave. You are unwanted intruders. Do not disturb our lord’s research-- this world’s salvation. Why do you willingly strive for self-suffering? Why are you reaching out to your own pain?

So here -- the shadow wants them to leave the palace well enough alone. To leave Maruki to his research, and to allow this reality to exist. They don’t want this to end violently and it seems like they’re okay with the trio not ‘desiring salvation’. And when the trio refuse to leave, the shadow asks them why they want to suffer. It’s something inconceivable to them. Maybe even challenging their resolve-- to reconsider their current path, which will only lead to more pain. Also ‘salvation’, ding, on the christian theme counter. Deliverance from above from sin, even redemption. Not for one person, but for the whole world. 

We see this type of shadow again before the scene in the auditorium. 

Shadow: You are misguided. Do not search for pain. Only tragedy awaits you beyond here. [After defeating it] Such a fool, rejecting our lord’s mercy. In that case -- witness it for yourself.

Same themes. Delicious. Lets move on now shall we.

3) Hastur -- the shadow that appears with Maruki at his reveal as his second-in-command / bodyguard

I don’t think i’ve talked about how much i love the lopsided smiles on these masks. Because i love it. it’s just the right amount of unsettling and creepy. fUCk. And the twitching, twisting, and the weeping blue paint that Hastur’s shadow form does before transforming is /chefs kiss. I wanted more.

Anyway, onto Hastur’s design. Not a labcoat this time, just an ordinary looking white suit with no tie. This is the only time we see Maruki have a bodyguard shadow -- something else he relies on. Hastur’s presence in this scene only shows how deeply afraid and uncomfortable Maruki actually is with intruders in his palace. This experience is a reminder that someone had come into Rumi’s parents house to kill him years ago (a theory for another time). Like that incident years ago, he doesn’t resort to violence here -- he did and does try to negotiate. But when that didn’t work, at least now he has something that can fight for him. 

( It is only in the second infiltration when we see Maruki actually take a more active role -- but I won’t get to that here. )

Hastur: Stubborn imbeciles, rejecting our lord ...

There is a running theme here, unfortunately. The shadows again cannot comprehend why anyone would choose to reject Maruki’s salvation, why anyone would choose suffering. And words like ‘foolish’ ‘misguided’ and finally ‘imbeciles’ here are all used to describe those who choose to reject it. While i do think Maruki only bends reality if the person wishes it (subconsciously or consciously), and does accept that there are people who won’t accept their wishes being granted and is aware of the reasons why-- He cannot fully understand or emphatise with it. 

4) These deformed Maruki-like shadows guarding the control room

Jesus christ above, i don’t like these, because they contrast with all other designs as these are more brutish and deformed. There’s used as gatekeepers at certain points of the palace, in the first control room, and later on in the brain-pod-room (my brain cells are stopping to work now excuse me) before the garden puzzle portion, at his final will seed and the entrance to the garden of eden.

We know Maruki isn’t a brute strength kinda person. And yet we see these few who’s only purpose is to defend certain things and areas with force. Its uncharacteristic, but at the same time, given the things that these shadows are defending -- it makes sense. No cunning, no wit, no negotiation, no compassion -- just forcefully defending very important parts of his heart and his work. 

Shadow (at the control room): So you dare defy His Excellency. You shall not interfere with our master’s work!

Shadow (brainwash room): Foolish rebels! You won’t take one step past here!

Shadow (entrance to garden of eden) : You?! I can’t believe you’ve made it so far ...

I had to do a double take on this. I think this is the only time this title ‘His Excellency’ has been used in the palace. While it is used for catholic bishops and that sort -- its mostly used in the context of heads of state, ambassadors-- more secular roles. The other times this shadow speaks is also similarly less reverent, less religious orientated. Of course this makes sense if the only function of these shadows is to use force to defend. They’re not the scientists or the first maruki-imitation shadows -- they’re not as devoted, and they dont have to be. 

5) Finally, these limbless noodles

This one is found during the horticulture portion of the palace. I can’t exactly figure out why. And as far as i can tell, they only appear in this portion of the palace.

As far as the design goes -- these are probably the most unhuman like. Slender, androgynous with only a mask. I’ve got nothing. Braincells ran out. Sorry!

(Haha androgynous maruki go brr)

SO! That’s it. thanks for coming to my ted talk and following me down this rabbit hole. I need to go and drink some fuckin tea.