#task 1 - i think they did it⠀
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alongside someone like you
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fushiita#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk 266#jjk leaks#i feel like i say this after every piece at this point but iam once again. SO TIRED#collapses dead#cries i did it again i ws up all last night finishing the first 1.....tht one took *counts* 8 hours...#got 3 hrs sleep n picked up where i left off on th second one at 8 in the morning#2nd one absolutely ruined me n made the third one feel like a herculean task . even tho its literally just them on a bed#rooms....KITCHENS......beloathed!!!! public enemy no1 kill on sight!!!!!!#hell is real and they make u render different rooms of houses from scratch no perspective tool no clue what ur doing#n they see how long it takes u to completely lose it#clipped yuujis bangs back tho n i thought tht was cute . silver linings#1ST ONE WAS SO FUN ALSO idk if its bc outdoor environments r forgiving or bc i had more energy n was fresh faced n hopeful or what#but it is by far my favourite. once again pulled out nearly every nature brush in my arsenal#third one meh simple safe soft w/e i was just so exhausted after th kitchen tht working on it was such a slog#oh ya i added a bunch of scars 2 yuuji's arms n lobbed off his ring finger sighs the yuuji injury list (tm) grows every minute#also HINA USE YELLOW CHALLENGE CLEAR golden hour in2 sunset my beloved <333 easy warm light + safe homey Peaceful vibes...bless#cries eternally thinking abt them let us have this let THEM have this pls thank u#ok i need to not look at these anymore take them enjoy my contribution 2 the domestic itfs pile
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listen I honestly think wilson really enjoyed that little arc where he was cooking every single one of house’s meals. I know he’s house’s main source of food anyway but usually just via ‘stolen’/bought lunch at work. I’m talking about when they lived together in season 2 and his ass made macadamia nut pancakes for breakfast on a WEEKDAY. and pot roast for dinner. so much effort and for what…because house was gobbling that shit up…? yes he complained about it every time but he also had an extra fork on hand when house came home to stuffed peppers. it feeds into his need to be needed complex. the intimate dependency of someone relying on you for sustenance. also why they used food as the metaphor for why house was craving his presence. this is what I mean when I say that wilson deserved a housewife era. house went stir crazy within like 12 seconds of doing all their chores because he requires Stimulation™️ but I’m completely convinced that it would act as enrichment for wilson. if I told him to go make me a sandwich he’d roll his eyes and then passive aggressively make a delicious one. actually that literally happened in son of a coma guy. case closed
#that scene where house finally let him indoors after sitting on the porch for several hours#and wilson is like that’s so mean why did you do that :(#also you didn’t even do the dishes…#n house responds like doooont care. what’s for dinner#& wilson just accepts it 💀#cmon I know he’s a pushover but he’s not THAT big of a pushover#he likes it#I honestly think that when they were roomates in s6#house would feign incompetence surrounding domestic tasks#like ‘oh my leg hurts I can’t fix the sink’#not for his own benefit#but because wilson is 1. canonically a little ocd (I say this as someone with ocd) about shit around the home#and 2. thrives off of feeling useful#hilson would’ve survived mac and dennis move to the suburbs#house md#greg house#gregory house#hilson#house/wilson#james wilson#hatecrimes md
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i need an exploration of knuckles' life before the events of sonic 3 so bad ........ he was a kid that was all alone with zero civilisation for OVER A DECADE. like????? helloooooooooo????? pls i need this exploredddd
#knuckles the echidna#i repeat myself a lot bc i never stop thinking about this#like i dont even care about his origins anymore i just wanna know what his life was like#what thoughts did he have#hes sooo the type to drown out his thoughts with chores ..#i wanna SEE that i wanna SEE him doing mundane tasks around the island day in and day out#avoiding thinking about his circumstances and the uncertainty of if he'll ever get to have any sapient interactions in his lifetime#i wanna see how the isolation affected him i wanna see the very real consequences#by adventure 1 hes so like resigned to it all all he can do is accept that he'll be stuck doing this job forever#but when did that become something he was resigned to?#when did he stop yearning for more?
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traditional style 💖
#akoya gero#gero akoya#cute high earth defense club love#binan koukou chikyuu bouei bu love!#boueibu#my art#my akoya wanted to join in the vintage dress-up party too!! \;;w;;/#ognvuhgh i wanted to have this done earlier bc other people were doing art so fast for the new outfits but it got dragged out#it was Mostly done a few days ago and i made final edits and was going to post it just before i rushed out to work#i put it up then i was like '??? wait there's a color blob in the wrong place i thought i fixed that???'#i was down to my last minute and didn't have time to do it so i was like auuuughhgh and took the whole thing down#on the Next day i opened the file again to see what was wrong and the color blob was NOT THERE#so im like ??? why did it suddenly appear again in the png. so i looked and i made an error in naming my files#i accidentally named one of the versions 30 instead of 03 so it sorted into the last place instead of the actual most recent version (07)#so that is the reason i ended up being 1 minute late to work. and the lesson to me is i should not try to post at the absolute last minute#(i say this but if i don't get smth done i can't stop thinking about it. it bothers me constantly to have something almost finished but not#(and then it's difficult for me to focus on other tasks so this is why i feel like i have to just get it done before i switch tasks)#anyway i wasn't totally sure what era the traditional outfits are supposed to be from. im not knowledgeable about fashion actually T.T#i googled 'when were suspenders popular' and ended up just looking at old photos and clothing patterns from the 30s-40s#photos from back then were black-and-white can you believe it.. you have to actually look at drawings and paintings to find color#everyone who left me messages elsewhere: THANK YOU SO MUCH!! \>/////</ i will reply soon!! \;;W;;/
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Anxious? Nervous? Feeling the impending doom? May I interest you in ”chugging so much coffee as fast as u can”!! With this lowprice solution, you too can think about all of ur flaws, mistakes and future stresses with quadruple the energy and efficiency !! It is almost free !! What are you waiting for ???? Pick up the phone and order ”chugging so much coffee as fast as u can” today for the low-price of one (1) anxiety attack at 1-800-MISTAKE !!! You will not regret it !!!!
#uhh idk reminders to self that one (1) cup of coffee straight after waking up is enough#u don’t need 2 cups in the first like half an hour#also yes i think im funny and my brain read this in that Welcome to Nightvale voice for some reason#i’ll go listen to a podcast and do dishes like that’s the calmest thing to do when u have bunch of nervous energy#also just had a zoom call that was like 10mins but did I manage to say even one thing? nope i did not and now i started my day very poorly#with feeling like I already failed a task (no but like rly had nothing to add to things and im bad at just talking if it’s not necessary)#september 2023#2023
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two silly thoughts from me still thinking too much about UA teaching logistics:
1. I think given all might's time limit at the beginning of the series, they really can't have given him a homeroom class to look after - but I do think it would be very funny if nedzu did it anyway. yeah I know you're just here for OFA purposes and that you can only be in hero form for like 3 hours per day, but you do have to spend like 15 minutes of that looking after 20 random wide-eyed business course kids. no slackers allowed
2. each year presumably has the same class structure as what we see for class a's year - 2 hero classes and 1 of each of the others - [ETA: oops no they don't, it's apparently 2 hero classes and THREE of each of the others??? consider this now a non-canon-compliant joke:] but it seems at least vaguely plausible that the additional hero class is a more recent addition brought on either by hero commission pressure to churn out more heroes per year, or - funnier option - as a counterbalance for the fact that aizawa is expelling like 50% of the hero course anyway, so you have to start out with a bigger pool
#bnha posting#some random UA staff member looking at nedzu's plan to basically double the amount of resources needed to run the hero course:#um sir couldn't you just. tell eraserhead to stop doing that?#nedzu for whom aizawa's chaotic energy is his favourite spectator sport: no <3#i also think it would be funny if nedzu just kept giving all might so so many little admin tasks and additional roles#like he's supervising student book clubs now. he has to draw up the rota for cleaning the faculty lounge#and all might is like is. is he trying to get me to slow down and have injury recovery time?? did i do something to make him mad??#what?? is going on??#true motive could be any combo of these but also i just think it'd be funny to know you could make the number 1 hero & symbol of peace#have to coordinate timesheets for the science lab#man if you think for too long about anything in this show it either gets kind of horrifying or really really funny#UA is both but the 2nd one's really getting me lately
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the thing that finally let me understand wyll was seeing a couple posts about how he's like. unfazed in the beginning. this is normal to him
very "the day you were taken by the nautiloid was the worst day of your life. for the blade of frontiers, it was tuesday"
#bg3#bg3 wyll#he really did get off the ship and then saunter over to the nearest place that needed saving#oh i was abducted by mindflayers? eh time to teach these kids how to hold a sword#and also to believe in themselves#the thing about wyll for me is that i accidentally didn't recruit him right away#straight up just missed him. got distracted by zevlor and that merc asshole#and in my first run i was very task oriented so i missed karlach as well#fully got through the whole thing up to the party in like 8 hours#then learned it should've taken me more like 30#oh also didn't get lae'zel til the end of the act either#so wyll and lae'zel both took a backseat#i did hang out with karlach ill admit to that#partly bc her vibes are immaculate from day 1 and partly bc it was shadowheart astarion gale and me (cleric) for ages#do you have any idea how fucking incredible a barbarian feels when you've been living with 3 casters and a rogue#anyway sorry for thinking you were normal and kinda boring lawful good wyll#didn't realize that actually you're unhinged and have absolutely no point of reference for regular behaviors
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Day 1
Pattern is the free Flax sweater by Tin Can Knits, and I'm using their app which is very nice to use to knitting their patterns. Yarn is Wool Ease in Arrowwood, and it is the softest I have ever felt Wool Ease be, so I guess the yarn gods are smiling on this project. This is my first attempt at knitting a sweater, though I have crocheted one and a half of them, and this will also probably be my biggest project to date, though the Supernova mkal was also quite large, and quite a few stitches.
I'm doing the short rows version, knitting my neck ribbing afterwards, and this will be size xxl because I want it to be a little loose on me.
#description in alt text#knitting#knitblr#knit#sweater#my very first sweater#i want to keep track of how many days it takes me even if im not tracking hours#technically today is day 2 but i did end up frogging it and re casting on earlier due to several errors on my part#so im counting this as day 1 since it was technically cast on today#im back to where i was when i frogged it though!#may be a big task but im hoping to have it down my the time we go to a festival we have planned for either the 16th or 21st#so 2 or 3 weeks?#i think of i consistently work on just this i could do it#wish me luck!
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New Employee aquired today
My manager: Hey Grace maybe you can show NE some things, but don't overwhelm her
Me:
Me: so like. make sure it's not a repeat of my first day???
#like maam ive worked here for barely a month you know this#and my first ever shift was 8 hours and CLOSING#i did a lil bit of everything my first day why do you think im so adaptable to what you need now???#anyways i had NE help shred chicken cause we needed more and then i couldnt even use it bc we were out of the salad kit 🙃#today twas a long day#i was supposed to do subs but literally worked on salads all day cause we were so short staffed#a coworker who YESTERDAY asked for a shift today never showed up. our manager had to open and was barely through salads when i got there#(3 hours after open)#me and manager tackled customer service and did as many tasks as we could (specifically distress and make salads)#(i learned how to do temps)#morning cook stayed late WITHOUT TAKING A BREAK to bring back some stuff we needed#closing cook got sick and left when me and NE did leaving i assume 2 store managers (maybe just 1) and one coworker to close#we so short staffed they had a job fair JUST FOR OUR DEPARTMENT.#anywho#ive also been up technically since 1-2am. i got extra 1 hour between then and 5:30am before i had to get up. i went to bed at 9pm#so. ive been tired all day but since i dont have work tomorrow im gonna stay up late and chill#amber's shit you can ignore
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#personal#it feels like im not allowed to complain about my own life on my own blog#or at least that if im allowed to that it seems very firstworld problem very selfish very not appropriate with all thats going on#that people will and do think less of me for expressing my own sadness and frustrations because theres no way it compares#to a lot of peoples very big and very real problems#but im so fucking sick of being poor and small. all ive had to eat today is 2min noodles roughly 10 hours ago#and all ill get tomorrow is a bowl of 2min noodles but ittl be another 15 or so hours until its the most reasonable to eat that#thats the real girlmath and then thats the last of my noodles. that leaves me with one (1) small tin of tuna#which might end up being tonights intermediary food if i really cant wait 15 nore hours for my next noodles but is supposed to be#the one meal of the day after tomorrow. so if i eat it too soon then i have even more time that i just dont fucking eat#im so sick to death of being in this position. like its literally killing me and theres fuck all i can do to make it better#ive tried. and i try and i try and i try but i can never afford anything#my landagent keeps sending me textx asking when theyll see a patment for my $50 water bill#i have to stop myself from texting back every time. youll see payment when im not spending literally 75% of my pay on rent alone#when i can afford to buy food and bills at the same time. whn i dont feel like kms-ing would be better than paying you my rent every frtnite#i crave a burger so bad i cant make myself do any tasks. i cant start or continue any crafts or chores because all im thinking about#is a burger like a blorbo rotating in my mind alongside the background noise that i wont get a burger and will only get noodles but not for#hours. a whole days worth of hours almost#my shitawful roomate is back and i have to play nice but he gives me the same feelings my abusive mother did. im scared to leave my room#in the safeplace house ive spent the last two years building for myself. this feels awful. things were all going so right and now#all of a sudden theyre all going as wrong as possible and im struggling so much. with no one to help. no one cares enough to help#the few people i do have are wrapped up in their own lives. which i get. but it doesnt take away the hurt of dealing with it all alone again#lot of momma trauma coming up with the end of eclipse season and i thought i was handling it. now i just feel fucking awful all the time#like ik healing isnt linear but the roomate triggers so hard things i thought i had processed and was on top of#would a burger fix that? no but itd atleast give me something to emotionally lean on for strength though it. but all ive got is noodles#24 hour apart one meal per day noodles. and tomorrow is my last pack. my only solace lately is that ive been invited to my first ever rave#or my first real rave anyway ive only been to one other 'edm event' that was not really a rave of any scale it was like 25 people#but its a halloween rave so im hoping for spooky fun dancetimes at least theres that. im out of data and spotifyprem so i havent been able#to take my silly little mental health walks bc theres zero chance im doing that without music and so itll be noce to get outside fr the rave#anyway. im doing very poorly i appreciate you few who reached out while i wasnt active but i expect ill continue to do poorly for some time
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𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐊 𝟎𝟏 - 𝐈 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐊 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐘 𝐃𝐈𝐃 𝐈𝐓
delegacia de des moines, quatorze de julho, 16:52.
wora ajustava sua pulseira repetidamente, um tique nervoso que adquirira nos últimos anos. naquele dia específico, a ansiedade parecia corroer a alma, o ansiolítico não estava fazendo efeito, a deixando à mercê de seu próprio autocontrole. o trajeto até a delegacia fora uma sequência de pensamentos intrusivos e tentativas falhas de se acalmar. com alguns minutos de atraso, ela finalmente entrou na sala de interrogatórios. o local estava iluminado por luzes frias, o cheiro de café e desinfetante misturavam-se, causando um embrulho no estômago. duas pessoas já estavam à espera: o delegado desprat, com uma expressão de tédio e uma oficial auxiliar, de semblante um pouco mais amigável. ao vê-la entrar, o investigador olhou para o relógio em seu pulso e depois para ela. “boa tarde, senhorita. por favor, sente-se.” seus olhos avaliaram cada movimento de wora enquanto ela se dirigia à cadeira vazia. “sou o delegado baptiste desprat e essa é minha colega, a oficial louise leclerc.” ele puxou uma folha de dentro de uma pasta, suspirando logo em seguida. “bem, já estamos atrasados. vamos começar.”
“wora nam, 28 de janeiro de 1990.” o delegado começou, falando alto o suficiente para que qualquer pessoa do lado de fora pudesse ouvir. “também conhecida como… celeste.” ele fez uma pausa, levantando os olhos por alguns segundos. “estrangeira, cidadania francesa concedida há quatro anos.” wora permaneceu em silêncio, apenas fazendo um breve aceno com a cabeça conforme ele falava. “sabe, senhorita nam, tivemos dificuldade para encontrá-la. pelo que vi nos registros, visitamos três endereços até finalmente conseguirmos entregar a intimação.”
wora forçou um sorriso, um reflexo quase mecânico diante da situação. suas mãos estavam geladas e ela as colocou no colo, tentando disfarçar o tremor. "é porque eu… eu me mudo muito. não gosto de ficar no mesmo lugar por muito tempo." a voz soou um pouco mais firme do que se sentia por dentro.
baptiste soltou o ar pelo nariz, um som que refletia sua insatisfação evidente com a resposta. ele observou wora por mais alguns segundos antes de voltar a falar, dessa vez com um tom ligeiramente mais irritado. "vamos direto ao ponto. você conhecia victor kothari-dagoty?"
“claro. ele foi presidente da fraternidade kappa phi, a fraternidade eu fazia parte na universidade. e também… éramos vizinhos.” acrescentou, a voz um pouco mais hesitante. “na l'orangerie victor era uma pessoa muito atenciosa, fazia de tudo por todos ali dentro. costumávamos conversar bastante. ele era um dos que me incentivavam em relação à minha carreira médica.” fez uma pequena pausa. “depois que ele deixou a universidade, nos vimos pouco. não mantivemos contato direto até eu me mudar para a casa ao lado da dele.”
ele ergueu as sobrancelhas, trocando um olhar com louise. "você foi interrogada na época em que victor foi morto, não foi?"
"sim, eu falei com alguns policiais na época. eles colheram meu depoimento e nunca mais me contataram a respeito do caso."
o investigador inclinou a cabeça, fazendo uma anotação rápida. "e como era a relação entre vocês dois?"
"nossa relação era… era boa. sempre que me via, ele me cumprimentava, conversava sobre o mercado, emprego… coisas normais. eu tinha mais contato com a mãe dele, adelaide."
“entendo. então, vocês tinham uma relação amigável, mas distante.”
wora assentiu lentamente, as mãos ainda tremendo. “sim, exatamente.”
baptiste soltou um suspiro profundo, tomando um gole do seu café em seguida. "muito bem. onde você estava na data da morte dele?"
ela fechou os olhos, tentando recordar todos os detalhes daquele dia. “de vez em quando, eu cuidava das filhas de anne e naquele…”
“informe o nome completo dos envolvidos, por favor.” interrompeu louise, enquanto fazia anotações.
a resposta veio de forma hesitante e entrecortada. "anne dupont… uma amiga da época da residência, ela mudou para estrasburgo, recentemente. naquele dia, eu… levei a mais velha para encontrar alguns amigos no parque. menos de uma hora depois… eu… tive que levá-la ao hospital porque ela teve uma reação alérgica. passei o resto da manhã e parte da tarde com ela.” sentia o rosto quente, a frustração evidente por não conseguir se manter firme. "depois, eu…" sentiu a garganta apertar, a familiar sensação de lágrimas borbulhando nos cantos dos olhos. com um suspiro pesado, ela continuou, lutando para manter a compostura. "eu voltei para casa e não sai o resto do dia."
a resposta pareceu satisfazer momentaneamente o delegado, que fez um aceno de cabeça a leclerc. "você sabia que victor estava investigando a vida das pessoas que integravam a kappa phi na data do acidente de fiona? alguma vez foi procurada por ele?”
“não. ele nunca me procurou diretamente para falar sobre isso, como disse, nossas conversas eram mais triviais.” já era evidente o rumo que aquela conversa iria tomar e o efeito colateral de seu nervosismo já dava sinais. era inevitável, qualquer sinal de desconforto, wora chorava. naquele momento usava toda a sua energia para não cair em prantos. não eram as perguntas em si que deixavam naqueles estado e sim, a situação. não imaginava que algum dia fosse voltar para uma sala de interrogatórios, muito menos ser praticamente obrigada a reviver tudo aquilo que tinha a tanto custo tentado esquecer.
louise folheou os papeis na mesa, o silêncio na sala interrompido apenas pelo som abafado das páginas sendo viradas. ela finalmente encontrou a página que buscava e mantendo uma expressão serena, olhou para wora que se ajeitava na cadeira, visivelmente tensa. “em dez de outubro de 2015 você colaborou com a polícia, compartilhando detalhes sobre o acidente de fiona agnew. você ainda lembra o que aconteceu naquele dia?”
wora desviou o olhar por um momento. a lembrança da festa voltou com clareza, como se ela pudesse quase sentir a vibração e o barulho daquela noite. ela começou a falar, a voz baixa e hesitante. "estava acontecendo uma festa na fraternidade. era para comemorar alguma coisa em relação aos trotes com os calouros. sempre aconteciam festas na kappa phi, mas aquela era diferente. parecia que todos estavam mais animados, mais alcoolizados que o normal."
o delegado inclinou-se um pouco para frente, os olhos fixos nos dela. "a senhorita era uma dessas pessoas?"
ela balançou a cabeça. "não. nunca fui muito de festas, também nunca gostei de ficar bêbada. sempre me policiei para não passar do ponto. em um certo momento, eu já tinha me separado dos meus amigos e estava tentando voltar para o meu quarto, quando ouvi uma briga no andar de cima. saí da casa e esperei a confusão acabar. foi quando aconteceu a explosão. muita gente saiu correndo." ela fez uma pausa, o corpo tremendo ligeiramente ao lembrar dos eventos seguintes. “alguém gritou por ajuda. minha ajuda. eu… eu estava cursando medicina, ele esperava que eu fizesse alguma coisa.” wora sentiu as lágrimas ameaçarem cair e lutando para mantê-las sob, controle, abaixou a cabeça. “mas eu… eu fiquei paralisada. não consegui fazer nada.”
"você acha que foi apenas um acidente?" louise quebrou o silêncio com a pergunta direta.
wora fez um sinal negativo com a cabeça. “não sei, acho que… podia ter acontecido com qualquer um. aquela noite foi uma confusão, ninguém parecia ter controle sobre nada.” na verdade, nunca tinha pensado em qualquer outra possibilidade que não fosse um acidente. respirou fundo, tentando se recompor, o rosto úmido. "acho que foi uma tragédia."
“você acha que victor tinha motivos para desconfiar que alguém causou o acidente?” baptist prosseguiu.
louise, observando atentamente, inclinou-se levemente para frente, como se quisesse reduzir a distância entre elas. "e quanto a você, wora? victor tinha motivos para achar que você poderia estar envolvida?"
ela mordeu levemente o lábio inferior, uma tentativa de controlar seu nervosismo. “alguma coisa aconteceu para fiona ficar daquele jeito. se foi de propósito? não sei. se ele estava investigando, então devia ter um motivo concreto.” baptiste tamborilou os dedos na mesa, criando um som ritmado que ecoava na sala silenciosa. ele olhou para suas anotações antes de voltar a fixar os olhos em wora. "talvez... sim." wora hesitou, passando a mão pelos cabelos num gesto que demonstrava seu crescente desconforto e a dificuldade em articular os pensamentos.
seus olhos se arregalaram, o coração disparando enquanto ela balançava a cabeça vigorosamente, o pânico crescendo em seu peito. "não, eu… eu nunca fiz nada. não.. não tenho e nunca tive nada haver com aquilo. se ele achava que alguém estava envolvido, eu não sou a pessoa certa para dizer quem." a respiração ficou mais rápida e superficial.
baptiste a observou por mais alguns segundos, antes de se recostar na cadeira, a expressão pensativa. louise terminou suas anotações e olhou para ele, esperando pela próxima pergunta. "você foi procurada por victor nos últimos anos?"
a pergunta mal foi formulada pelo investigador quando wora soltou um “não.” a resposta saiu automática, séria, mas ao mesmo tempo um pouco trêmula. ele arqueou uma sobrancelha, consultando um dos papeis à sua frente, mas não fez nenhum comentário.
o silêncio que se seguiu foi pesado, preenchido apenas pelo som da caneta de louise rabiscando no bloco de notas. desprat olhou para wora com uma expressão difícil de decifrar, ponderando suas respostas. ele finalmente se endireitou na cadeira, limpando a garganta. “muito bem, por ora, já é o suficiente. vamos chegar as informações e caso precisemos de mais detalhes vamos entrar em contato.” ele começou a empilhar os papéis em um montinho ordenado enquanto se levantava. “pedimos gentilmente que não saia da cidade e atualize seus dados de contato na recepção.” a formalidade em sua voz se esvaindo enquanto ele e louise deixavam a sala, fechando a porta atrás de si.
sozinha na sala de interrogatórios, wora sentiu uma onda esmagadora de alívio misturada com exaustão. a tensão acumulada durante a conversa a abandonava aos poucos, deixando um vazio pesado em seu lugar. sem conseguir mais segurar, ela encostou a cabeça na mesa fria e começou a chorar silenciosamente, os ombros tremendo a cada soluço abafado. o pensamento de ter que lidar com mais interrogatórios, de ver a história se repetindo, fazia seu estômago revirar. não conseguia ficar indiferente à situação. pensava em adelaide, como a mulher doce e alegre tinha virado uma sombra de tristeza depois de perder o filho. pensava em victor também. as circunstâncias brutais de sua morte se juntavam à imagem inerte de fiona, causando uma agonia ainda maior em wora.
após um tempo, ouviu o som de passos se aproximando. um policial abriu a porta, observando-a com uma expressão de preocupação. "senhorita, está tudo bem?" a voz dele era suave, quase paternal.
ela levantou a cabeça, os olhos inchados e vermelhos. "sim, estou bem." respondeu, tentando parecer convincente. limpou rapidamente as lágrimas com a manga da blusa, respirou fundo e se forçou a se levantar. a sala parecia girar levemente, mas ela se manteve firme.
"preciso ir agora." disse, a voz ainda trêmula. o policial assentiu e a acompanhou até a saída, onde ela se dirigiu à recepção para atualizar seus dados. sentia-se exausta, mas determinada a sair dali o mais rápido possível.
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finally did my goddamn dishes. and that wasn't all i managed to do today. fuck yeah.
had a meeting for thesis prep. bmv trip. rough plan for friday's discussion lecture. cooked dinner for the first time in like 3 weeks. read ~50 pages of academic text for 2 classes and a paper revision.
feels like i didn't do enough but. considering that yesterday i managed... going to classes and nothing else! and monday i was only capable of doing the required meetings i had, this is a pretty good day!
#it's been. a tough few weeks. i couldn't focus at all last week. only got work done on the weekend. yesterday was........ tough.#monday wasn't as rough but was equally exhausting#so! proud of myself that i got. stuff done. big stuff even!#started keeping a task/reward journal to help out too :)#so every night i'll write out some tasks that need to get done the next day#and as i finish them i check them off and give myself silly little stickers to track what i managed!#so i get like. 1 sticker per 10 pages read (bc i usually need a break every 10 or so pages rn) 1 sticker in a diff color for chores.#1 for teaching stuff (laying out a lecture plan/finishing the lecture/doing a dry run/doing the lecture) 1 for meetings etc etc#it's helping bc i have a dumbass brain that doesn't give me dopamine for completing tasks anymore#it all gets lumped into 'yeah i did the bare minimum bc that's what i need to do. that's not special-#-no reward for you! you didn't really *do* anything. just scraped bare minimum!'#turns out that's bad for you lmao to get No Rewards#so i have a journal now! so i have hard proof that shows that i've Done Shit.#and i think the last two weeks i've been 1. underfed 2. overtired and 3. on the verge of burnout#so i haven't been able to do much. but a major stressor is gone now! (the bmv trip...)#and it like. immediately lifted a veil from my brain. 0-60 in like 40 minutes flat.#i hadn't realized how stressed about that i'd even been. it was taking up so much of my brain's metaphorical CPU.#so i'm hoping tomorrow i'll be able to do what i was doing two weeks ago. just plugging along at my usual pace#instead of just barely dragging my carcass forward#so! anyway. update that was unasked for but you sure are getting#i fuckin did stuff today! fuck yeah!#it is now an hour past my bedtime i'm gonna crash tf out. bedtime. sleepytime. good night
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me wasting so much time before just asking for help like auuuuuuuuuugh
#I hate not knowing#I hate feeling like I'm asking a very basic question that should've been answered in like ch. 1 of the material!#since the task requirement just drops it like 'of course you know this term'#but I ctrl+f searched the text! I tried googling!#googling did provide answers but not clear/consistent enough for me to be sure it's what the assignment wants!#at this point I just had to ask and I still. put it off. for so long#but now the e-mail is sent and if the CI thinks I'm a dumbass welp#I'm at least a dumbass who will hopefully understand this assignment better
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I will continue being gone for a few days, sadly my original al plan of releasing the newest chapter of The Consequence Of Imagination's Fear has also been delayed. My apologies
Can't go into detail because its hush hush not-legally-mentionable stuff but today is my fifth 12 hour no-break work day. I'm also packing to move too in a fortnight (which is a Big Yahoo!! Yippee!! I'll finally have access to a kitchen!! And no more mold others keep growing!!! So exciting!!!)
#syncrovoid.txt#delete later#OKAY SO! this makes it sound like i have a super important job but really we are understaffed and ive barely worked there a year now#graduated college a few years early 'cause i finished high school early (kinda? it's complicated)#now i am in a position where i am in the role of a whole Quality Assurance team (testing and write ups)#a Task Manager/Planner#Software Developer and maybe engineer? not sure the differences. lots of planning and programming and debugging ect ect#plus managing the coworker that messed up and doing his stuff because it just isnt good enough. which i WILL put in my end day notes#our team is like 4 people lol. we severely need more because rhe art department has like 10 people??#crunch time is.. so rough..#its weirdddddd thinking about this job since its like i did a speedrun into a high expectations job BUT in my defense i was hired before#i graduated. and like SURE my graduating class had literally 3 people so like there was a 86%-ish drop out rate??#did a four year course in 2 BY ACCIDENT!! i picked it on a whim. but haha i was picked to give advice and a breakdown on the course so it#could be reworked into a 3 year course (with teachers that dont tell you to learn everything yourself) so that was neat#im rambling again but i have silly little guy privileges and a whole lot of thoughts haha#anywho i am SO hyped to move!! I'll finally get away from the creepy guy upstairs (i could rant for days about him but he is 0/10 the worst)#it will be so cool having access to a kitchen!! and literally anything more than 1 singular room#(it isnt as bad as it sounds i just have a weird life. many strange happenings and phenomenons)#<- fun fact about me! because why not? no one knows where i came from and i dont 100% know if my birthday is my birthday#i just kinda. exist. @:P#i mean technically i was found somewhere and donated to some folks (they called some different people and whoever got there first got me)#but still i think it is very silly! i have no ties to a past not my lived one! i exist as a singularity!#anywho dont think about it too hard like i guess technically ive been orphaned like twice but shhhhhhhh#wow. i am so sleep deprived. i am so so sorry to anyone who may read this#i promise im normal#@:|
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For some reason, I had a dream that Taffy was pregnant and needed specific medication that I, for some reason, was tasked with obtaining for him.
Apparently this also (for some reason) included Fumus being unable to touch Taffy while he's pregnant, and Taffy was absolutely living to tease Fumus about shit during it. I distinctly remember one part of the dream where Fumus said he'd do something for him in hour, and Taffy was like, "Oh...well, a good God could do it in an hour, but a better God could do it in half" (or something like that).
And I guess Fumus was so fucking offended and/or pissed that lo and behold, the task was done in 30.
#nyssa rambles#Fumus#Taffy#get your pregnancy out of my dreams what the hell#why was I tasked with obtaining the meds?? Did you look at me and go 'hey you work in pharmacy!'#Listen bro I don't want to deal with your med nonsense okay#that was a hell of a task#also I got sunburned in my dream#which is a load of shit#I can't even go outside in my own fucking dreams#good lord#okay but I can't get over Taffy riding the high of being catered to during his pregnancy lmfao#boy is digging his own grave for when it's over#ALSO WHOSE BABY WAS IT???#WAS IT OLIVE'S???#WAS IT FU#I don't think it was Fumus's actually#1. why would he do that and 2. I think I remember him being annoyed that this was a thing#but still not annoyed enough to beat the living shit out of him I guess#hm
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Apparently I can meet my goal of roughly 400,000 words in 6 months if I just somehow write at least 2,200 words a day ghbjh... Almost 2,500 today... huzzah...
#Definitely not going to be able to stick with it just due to like... being realistic about my energy levels and etc. ESPECIALLY as we#enter the Evil Summer and it becomes hot all the time. But... one can attempt.. at least...#I'm also a very slow writer since I tend to re-read and edit while I write. and only move onto the next section once what I'm writing#seems okay. Which is easy for visual novel type stuff. since ''sections'' of a conversation are more clearly marked (like if you#have a menu option with 5 different dialogue choices. finish the character's response for choice 1 before moving onto 2. etc.)#Especially since when I'm done with a whole quest I always follow it up by playing through it and picking every option and making sure it#actually all works okay and etc. So I am already going to see it all a second time. Then I can go back and reorder a few words or remove#certain sentences that don't sound natural when I read them out loud (I always read it all outloud to myself since it is... just peple#talking.. it should sound like natural dialogue in their voice. etc). But my ''first draft'' is kind of not as first drafty since I pause t#edit a lot as I go along. So it also takes longer probably than it would take other people who I think treat a first draft as more#of a loose guideline or something. AANYWAY...#80F in my bedroom right now again... huzzah... I did end up finishing and recording that sims build video before the heat wave (or is#it really a heat wave if it's just summer..?? lol) came in.. but now... augh.. the editing... plus the costume photos and all else... Much#to do as always.. Often such a long todo list.. a giant scroll hung upon the walls of the evil hermit wizard tower..#Anyhow.. I hope I can finish getting ready for bed early in time to reward myself with a game of tripeaks solitaire whilst I snack on#cheddar cheese and some of those preserved artichokes in a jar. hrgm... I actually have nasturtiums (ultimate best flower) on the#deck again this year but I had to move them all into a corner today because the leaves were getting burnt by the sun lol.. Also am now more#cautiously weaving through social media to ignore all dragon age news. NOT bc of spoilers (I actually love spoilers/literally never play#any game until there's full guides on it I can read to plan my entire playthrough based on knowing exactly what I want to happen lol + mods#and etc.) but just because I'm so busy with my ownprojects I simply do not have the brainspace to dedicate... Yes I love to think#about elves and fictional universe lore. but no.. I pretend I do not see it. Does not exist to me actually. ghgj.. OHH also took som#cool pictures of flowers in the garden section of a store and I wanted to do like.. character designs based on the colors of the flowers o#something. but that might just be another unnecessary project to add to the pile.. I want to commit to the daunting task of dyeing my#hair again some time.. hrm.. this is all of the updates I can think of. As if a bunch of random tags make up for never posting anything for#weeks on end lol.. alas.. too warm to think properly I suppose.. .. I neeeeeed a long lost relative to leave me some million dollar#estate in their will so I can have the resources to move to a colder climate or something ..augh#.. but for now.. I shall toil away in my little wizard tower trying to write 2000 something words a day whilst sweating and such ghbj
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