#study burn out

[iceagebaby]

Despondency / Refuge

that's supposed to be Bennys lighter, the Courier is dealing with cosequences of being thrown into a mess they had nothing to do with

the halo was something that turned out on an accident but i love it

Rant below

[iiping]

Light of the Kshahrewar ✨

[midoristeashop]

Jack prost

Jack studies but I was only allowed to ref the rotg concept art 🤩

[buttonheart]

He's such a good boy :>

[stuckinapril]

Finally signing up for piano lessons after a solid two years of talking ab doing it one day really is SO surreal . Neurosurgeon by day pianist by night this is the plan for me

[yashley]

laura & ashley & imogen & fearne in c3e80 or:

[collophora]

Found a cool color palette. Might finish it later. (Probably not.)

[cloudemojie]

me when i have a really important exam coming up but my brain decides that mizuki akiyama

[thou-babbling-brook]

Hand studies I did a few weeks ago

[puppyboywinger]

eat it or yeet it a human heart. still beating. stored indefinitely in an industrial freezer. i left it there because i knew i wasn’t done. i knew i had to find you and save you.

[speckaboo]

After catching up to recent episodes, I wanted to put my two cents in with Gwen and Jon's characterization since they both share similar vibes and not enough people talk about their differences.

First of all, Jon would never have done what Gwen did in the latest episode (ep 20). They both have a knack for pissing off Avatars/Externals, but even s1Jon wouldn't have mouthed off like that to one. Jon got beat up by Avatars for asking too many questions and not minding his own business (and for being Gertrude's successor), Gwen was just being blatantly antagonistic to a someone that literally kills people with tattoos because she got annoyed that they wouldn't sign her government form.

Second of all, Gwen isn't Eye-aligned like Jon was. Unlike Jon, she isn't curious. She doesn't ask questions or go looking for answers regarding the Externals. She does exactly what she's told, which is the exact opposite of how Jon operated. She's only interested in doing her job with the end goal of taking Lena's position, for whatever reason that might be.

And lastly, Gwen is selfish. While Gwen and Jon both wanted to be taken seriously in their line of work, Jon had given up that professionalism pretty quick when he realized people were getting hurt because of it. Even when he'd lost his humanity, he'd been terrified of putting anybody through the same terror he'd been through, to the point where he'd constantly put himself in harms way because of it. Jon was a stubborn idiot, but he cared deeply for other people. He never wanted others to get hurt, even when he wanted answers. (That's why he burned Gerry's page, after all.)

Gwen, on the other hand, isn't like that. When Gwen found out from FR3-DI that her boss had literally tried to murder someone that used to work here, her immediate response was to blackmail her to get a raise. She didn't warn her coworkers, she didn't even think of the risk to her own safety - just how it could benefit her. It's the same for when Gwen met with Bonzo and the other Externals. Even though Gwen found out what had happened to the people she'd sent Bonzo after, the fact that dozens of people died because of her involvement, she still didn't leave. She felt bad about it, sure, but it didn't stop her from continuing with it. Because for whatever reason, she wants that promotion so much that she's willing to let other people to die for it.

Gwen is not like Jon, who constantly sacrificed himself for others, nor like Gertrude Robinson, where the ends justified the brutal means. Unless there's some grand reason for it, a promotion isn't worth what she's doing. Gwen isn't heartless, but she is selfish.

She's not a monster just yet, but she is painfully human.

[valewritessss]

Just imagining percabeth studying in Percy’s room with soft music playing through speakers, occasionally getting distracted by gentle kisses and warm hugs, fingers carding through each others hair, cracking jokes and laughing at the unffuniest things

[ramblingsfromthytruly]

my academic journey (warning: i ranted) -

so ever since i started school till about the end of 8th grade i was always a 90%+/straight A student. the kind of child my classmates & cousins would be compared too. not trying to glamorize comparison btw, i personally think that's really toxic & pressurizing. so yeah, i was a "good" quiet kid. i listened attentively in class and submitted all my homework on time. the only complain teachers had about me was that i was "too quiet" but that wasn't a real issue. i was just shy but talkative with my few friends yano. i spent the entirety of 7th grade & most of 8th grade in online classes so my habits of studying went to shit. still somehow managed 91% in my 8th grade finals. and then 9th began and it all went downhill. teachers kept saying 'next year is ur board exams, u need to study a lot, etc, etc.' so if u're not from india we basically have these major 'board exams' at the end of 10th & 12th grade. but 10th boards don't really matter all that much, teachers just make a big fuss about it. 12th boards matter, but that's also the time we give college entrance exams and that sorta matters more according to most ppl. n yeah, idk what happened but i got overwhelmed. i could no longer just do well in class and study before exams and get good marks. i felt dumb. my grades didn't see a single improvement. i honestly gave up in the middle of it all and got sick of school. and at one point, it became less burn out & more clinging to the familiarity of not doing anything. i became lazy. and i became a hypocrite. i'd always tell myself, this time i'm gonna study, this time i'm gonna score well. well that 'this time' never came. 10th grade got even worse and i scored 73% in my board exams because i barely studied at all. at the same time, my relationship with my parents has constantly been unraveling. and i saw just how much of their 'pride' was dependent on me being the kid they could show off and smile widely when others replied 'wow she's going places'. my father can't hold a single conversation with me now that doesn't go back to me being a disappointment. and now i'm the kid who has to listen to her parents compare her to others. 'be like her, your friend', they say. halfway though 11th rn and i guess what?? still no fucking improvement. but the thing is i know this is the last straw. i can feel it. i got around 64% in my first tests (pa-1) of 11th. haven't gotten mid term results yet but i'm estimating just above 50%. and the thing is it's not that i can't score well. i know my potential all too well. i know i can score such high marks. but the problem is i don't study. if i just studied a couple hours every day, i can easily manage above 80%. with constant improvement i can manage above 90% again. but i don't. and that's ending right this instant. i'm not gonna turn into an academic weapon overnight or smth ik that. but i'm gonna start slowly but surely working hard. i have big dreams, i know i can achieve them if i just put in the effort. plans have been made, all i need to do is execute them. execute my laziness. i'm gonna get better. i'm gonna prove everyone who thinks i'm never gonna do it wrong, and i'm gonna prove myself right. this comeback will be for me, my inner child. the little kid in me deserves to not wind up a washed-out failure.

academic goals! -

pa-2 - 75-80%

11th finals - 80-85%

12th pa-1 - above 90%

uni - iiser (college for pure science research, bs + ms integrated)

[lost-estradiographer]

I

know that voting for the status quo sucks.

To say it "sucks" massively understates the exact amount of suffering that exists under the status quo, an amount that I acknowledge I am too privileged to ever fully grasp.

I cannot magically provide some viable third-party candidate just barely a month before the election. I cannot solve Israel/Palestine Conflict that has haunted the world for over 70 years. I am a 29-year old transgender woman working her way through her own mental illnesses, trauma, and an undergraduate degree. I was never going to be the one to solve anything here.

All I can tell you is that regardless of whether you vote or not, there will be a presidential election. It's going to be a shitshow, regardless. Whether you vote or not, there will be a different president in January. Voting for the status quo may not be directly in your interests.

We had four years of Trump and we are still trying to unfuck ourselves from that. The beginning of my antagonistic relationship with the government was protesting in the streets of DC under his administration. I've fled from the Metro PD. I've put on a change of clothes and slipped out the back door of a gay sports bar.

Fucking vote.

Fucking vote.

Fucking vote.

Honestly, I

I don't want to see this voter apathy shit anymore.

People are going to keep dying under any president. Any president can, and probably wil, be morally culpable for the deaths of innocent people, both in the country and abroad. Carter might be the last president we had that wasn't overtly a war criminal and we still had foreign civilians killed by U.S. military involvement under the Carter admin.

I'm torn between asking you to block me, or asking you to message me, if you're taking the route of voter apathy. I'll tell you right away, here and now, that I probably don't have a solution to whatever problem is keeping you from voting for Harris. I can't even solve my own problems right, tbh. The government isn't really here for me, either.

But there isn't going to be some sort of miraculous revolution that results in The Ending Where Everyone Lives. If there's a revolution, then supply chains will falter and children and the infirm will die of preventable diseases and infections and complications in hospitals that would have otherwise been able to easily deal with such things. That's what happens in a revolution. I'm after the long-term idea where Humanity as a species lives. I'm after the route where we don't have an ending, we keep going.

Fucking vote, because exactly one of the two leading presidential candidates believes climate change is real, and it is the single greatest threat to all life on earth. We have spent the past 250 years, not just playing God with the environment, but actively creating an ecological niche in which future generations of humanity must continue to play God with the environment, dragging it back to a healthy place drop by drop, inch by inch, a degree at a time.

Or, I mean, don't vote. Either way, we'll all die at some point. Perhaps some of us will be lucky enough to die standing by our principles.

Those lucky few will become soil one day, just like I will.

I am begging you on my hands and knees to fucking vote, though, because our options are The Status Quo vs. Worse. That's

That's it.

There is no door number three right now. Our system, our flawed and broken and imbalanced and unjust system, does not accommodate for a third door. Whether you vote or not, you will be dragged through either Door 1 or Door 2 with all of humanity, as we whirl through the cosmos upon our tiny little speck of dust. The only other legitimate option is to allow oneself to become trampled; to become soil early. I don't say legitimate to give this option legitimacy, but to make clear that again, there is no door three. Door three is a casket. A one-way bed.

I didn't vote in 2016, and I'm hoping that you'll vote for the status quo this time, because that's the route that gives me the best odds of having a long and healthy life to regret my failure through inaction.

Just please

Fucking vote.

Or again, if you're taking the apathy route, probably just save me the time of blocking you, because you're not going to magically pull a viable third-party candidate out of your pocket less than six weeks before the election.

[bluejulius]

snothat for your dash 🤲🏻

optional;

[stuckinapril]

Being a perfectionist is actually the worst thing to have happened to me because why am I chronically all or nothing about everything in my life