#stephanie brown text

[myrefugeblog]

Hoje é meu aniversário, então...

Batkids e aniversários.

• O primeiro aniversário que Dick se lembra foi comemorado enquanto eles estavam em turnê. O circo estava em São Petersburgo, seus pais o levou para ver a Praça de Santo Isaac, onde as primeiras rosas estavam surgindo. Depois que ele foi adotado por Bruce, Dick sempre visita as rosas que foram plantadas por Martha. Ele sempre presenteia os membros de sua família com uma rosa em

• O último aniversário que Jason teve com sua mãe, eles estavam passando muita necessidade. O dinheiro estava apertado, mas ela conseguiu um pedaço de bolo e uma vela e encorajou Jason a fazer um pedido. Hoje em dia, não importa o quão irritado com a batfamília Jason esteja, ele faz questão de preparar o bolo de aniversário deles.

• Tim não se lembra de ter tido uma festa de aniversário. Seus pais sempre trouxeram "presentes" (objetos que provavelmente deveriam pertencer a museus) que eles afirmam ter sido escolhidos para comemorar a data, mas nunca estavam presentes. Desde que Tim se tornou integrante da família no dia de seu aniversário tanto os Waynes, quanto seus amigos, se reúnem na mansão (que inevitavelmente precisa de reformas depois de cada festa).

• Steph manteve uma tradição com sua mãe de ter ao menos uma refeição juntas no dia do seu aniversário. Como sua mãe trabalhave em regime de plantão em hospitais em alguns anos elas se reuniam no café da manhã, em outros no almoço, ou mesmo no jantar. Depois que ela se integrou aos Waynes, apesar de seus protestos "Eu não sou sua filha Bruce" reuniões com toda batfamília antes da patrulha no dia do seu aniversário se tornaram comuns.

• Damian não teve a infância mais ajustada de todas, mas no seu aniverário ele e Talia sempre estavam em uma misssão. Uma maneira conveniente deles terem o dia inteiro sozinhos, nesses dias Talia incentivava Damian a agir mais livrimente. Depois de ir para Gotham ela ainda faz visitas na semana do aniversário de Damian, normalmente no fim de semana.

• Cass nunca comemorou aniversário antes de ser adotada. Ela escolheu comemorar dia 20 de março, Cass prefere pegar uma pessoa da família e viajar para um local que nenhum dos dois tenha visitado ainda.

• Duke passa os dias (manhã e tarde) do seu aniversário fora de patrulha, ele passa com sua família e visitando seus parentes. Durante a noite ele passa em patrulha com toda a batfamília. No fim de semana, após seu aniversário, Duke faz uma festa na mansão.

[fanaticalthings]

Bruce Wayne except he texts like an ominous boomer

wdym you can't tell if he's threatening them?

Based on this post by @mysterycitrus :)

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Bonus:

Happy birthday, Tim 🥰

[violent138]

On the role of Alfred, as understood by the JLA:

Robin!Dick: "It's pretty much Alfie that calls all the shots, sets my bed time and Batman's."

----

Red Hood: "It's like a Charlie's angels situation."

----

Red Robin, before going against League orders: "The boss? You mean like, Alfred? No I haven't asked him yet."

----

Spoiler: "You really want to be late for the dinner? Alfred won't be happy."

Bruce: *closes computer* "We'll finish this up some other time."

JLA: *confused*

----

Clark, after Bruce gets severely injured: "Oh God, Alfred’s going to kill me."

Hal: "Relax, what's he even going to do? You're bullet proof."

Clark, groaning and sitting down, head in hands: "That's not going to stop him."

Oliver: "Say the word, and I'll get you on an island not found on any map."

Hal: ???

[superbat-love]

Dick: [flaunting his Halloween costume] Ta-da! Guess what I’m supposed to be?

Cass: Fun Batman.

Jason: Batman having a midlife crisis.

Duke: Rainbow Batman?

Damian: Father with a fruit hat.

Tim: Fruity Batman.

Barbara: Batman finally being honest with himself.

Steph: Batman’s ‘Date night with Superman’ outfit.

Dick: …What? I’m supposed to be a Devil Fruit, guys! [points at his fruit stem headband]

Jason: I like my interpretation better.

Bruce: Thanks a lot, kids.

Dick: Well, what are you going to be wearing for Halloween, Bruce?

Bruce: This.

Barbara: You're going as Batman?

Bruce: No, I'm going as Bruce Wayne going as Batmaaan~~~

Tim: Omg, an even fruitier Batman.

[bruciemilf]

Funny: Bruce is completely ignorant about gen z slang

Funnier: Bruce misunderstands slang in general because his brain takes everything literally

For example:

Steph: Bruce, you look dope today.

Bruce, wondering how in God’s name he can look like weed:

[thedevilundercover]

I was thinking (shocking, I know) and I think the bat kids should have a little auction/market amongst themselves but for like stolen clothing

Like every three months they congregate in a fucking walmart parking lot (bc there’s way too much of them) at 3 am and they trade favours and stolen clothing for funsies.

There are some rules though like; It’s a strictly bat kid thing, no one else is allowed and the clothes must be of family members and family adjacents

Jason and Bruce’s clothes are always in demand bc theyre so fucking big.

*ehem* now here is my rendition of what would happen in one of these auction.

Tim: I’ll take the B/P route for a week if you give me your purple sweatshirt

Steph: Nuh uh 2 weeks or nothing

Dick: ✨guess what I got✨

every Bat kid looking at him, knowing what he was going to take out

Batkids, in synch: show us

Dick, pulling out one of Bruce’s oversized sweaters:

The whole group excluding Dick: ��̸̝̱̪̞̃̅̔̂͜͝ ̸̞͑̊w̸̡̱̙̫̱̯̲̅̈́ȃ̴͖͎̠͔͇͊̂̚n̶̡̧̜͉͙̝̜͑̍t̵̺̭͍̪͛̐̈́ͅ ̸̹͓̳̂̓̇i̵̢̪̰̻̤̎̈̓ͅt̵̜̳̝͘

[feyinvestigations]

Out of costume intermission

Pt1 //// prev. //// next

Masterpost

[shyjusticewarrior]

[dragonpyre]

Stephanie Brown is to the batfamily like what Shawn Spencer is to the Santa Barbara police department

[canigohomenoow]

Batfam on Twitter (3)

[graham-cracker-guillotine]

listen i mathed my way thru this:

tim b/c he's a wacko, duke to "recharge his powers" (ie also a wacko)

babs and alfred are the only normal ones in the family

bruce has too many children he can sleep thru storms. steph is probably passed out somewhere in the manor (cass' room)

jay, my favorite, has to be a lil traumatized from *gestures at entire life* but especially when he dUG HIMSELF UP FROM HIS GRAVE IN A STORM so yeah

dick is comforting a begrudging jason b/c of said storm

tim is stuck outside after trying to get himself struck by lightning. cass is not stuck!! she is simply enjoying the storm outside with a raincoat and an umbrella

when tim finally gets back inside he learns the wifi is gone and promptly goes back outside to try and get struck by lightning. damian is mad bc his video call with jon got cut off

thank u im here all day

[fanaticalthings]

next thing you're gonna tell me is that the butts match 🙄

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[violent138]

Tim, looking around the darkened corridor: "You think it's a good idea to be breaking into random places right now?"

Jason said nothing, fumbling in his pockets.

Dick: "You live here, don't you?" Which gets everyone's attention laser-focused.

Jason just cast him a look, getting the door open.

Steph entered first, smacking into something that falls over. "Jeez." She complained, stumbling backward until Cass steadied her by the shoulders. "Sorry, that's my bad."

Duke turned on the lights in one motion, making everyone blink and wince.

"Get off me." Damian snapped, and Dick carefully let him go, letting him limp angrily into a chair. He frowned, scrutinizing the place. "You live here? Why would anyone--"

"Guys." Dick rubbed his eyes over the mask, cutting off Damian and Jason’s sharp answer. "First aid kit?" Dick asked Jason tiredly.

Jason nodded, moving to get it and heard Damian ask "What?" in response to a patented glare he must be getting.

Tim had made a beeline for the kitchen. "Dude, why do you have a singular set of dishes? And why are there just guns in this cabinet?"

Jason scoffed, handing Dick the kit. "Didn't realize I was running a fucking bed and breakfast."

"There's guns in this cabinet too!" Tim shook his head, opening and closing two more. "Oh good, just large knives in this one."

At Tim's raised eyebrows, Jason went into the kitchen and shooed Cass down the counter she was perched on, grabbing the paper plates he kept in a drawer and shoving them into Tim's chest.

Glancing at the way Steph was rubbing her neck, slouched at the table, Jason grabbed two ice packs, sliding one her way and throwing the other to Damian.

Duke, taking a book off Jason's meticulously organized shelf: "Why do you have seven copies of Pride and Prejudice? Did you keep forgetting you bought it, or--?"

Jason, storming over to put the book back. "Stop."

Dick looked up from the wound he was stitching. "Are they different at at all?"

"Are they in different languages?" Steph asked.

"Did you barter them for food? Because your fridge is fucking empty." Tim reported.

Jason groaned, realizing that they weren't going to drop it. "One has a different introduction and one is the zombies version. And yes, the rest are the same, now could you all stop touching stuff?"

"Why do you have five copies of the same book?"

[superbat-love]

Bruce stomped into the living room with the kids clutched under his arms—Steph and Barbara under his left arm, and Jason and Dick under his right arm. Clark followed closely behind him, carrying Damian, Jon, Duke, Kon and Tim.

Nine soaking wet little kids were unceremoniously dumped on the floor in front of the fireplace. Cass silently jumped down from her spot on Bruce’s shoulders to curl up on the armchair.

Clark: Alright, explain to us why you kids were out playing in the forest in this storm.

Dick: We wanted to play hide and seek, so we had to find a bigger space.

Bruce: The Wayne manor is on 150 acres of land.

Jason: Yeah well, if some people didn’t cheat…

Duke: Nobody hacked into the cameras around the place!

Tim: I-It’s not our f-fault you guys pick the most obvious places to h-hide.

Steph: Even without the cameras you still cheated, Tim. I saw you guys. You got Kon to fly you up the mountain! We agreed on ‘No Superpowers’! And now you’ve got hippo…hippopotamus.

Barbara: I think you mean hypothermia, Steph.

Kon: How is that considered cheating? Flying is not a superpower. Birds fly!

Jon: Dogs fly!

Dick: That’s just Krypto, Jon.

The kids huddled around together, discussing whether flying is considered a superpower.

Clark: Enough, you are all grounded for putting yourself in danger.

Bruce: [yelling over the kids’ protests] I don’t want to hear any excuses! Everyone is grounded except Cass.

Kon: She played with us too! She hid near the entrance of the forest.

Bruce: Still considered to be on Wayne property.

Damian: Can we be grounded in the barn?

Jason: The barn? That’s the dumbest suggestion I’ve ever heard.

Dick: Hey! You can’t call people dumb, dummy.

Damian: I want to play with the chickens, okay? They’ll get lonely!

Jon: That sounds fun! I want to play with the chickens too!

Barbara: Don’t listen to them! I vote for the kitchen, because Alfred is there.

Steph: Me too! Alfred makes great cookies!

Bruce: This isn’t a vote. You will each be grounded in your own rooms.

Superbat Family Fics

[bruciemilf]

Normal regular people should slowly plant themselves into the Wayne clan.

There’s this busboy that works with uncle TJ. Dick learns his name is Mikey when he stops by the restaurant. He hasn’t been since Bruce took him when he was 10.

the Bat has no idea the prodigal son returned to the nest. So Mikey’s suddenly babysitting a strange vigilante with the horsepower of 4 drunk girls in an Uber.

“It’s just so fucking frustrating because I WANT to be here but he doesn’t TELL me he wants me here! I want him to want me! I want him to say ‘hey, by the way, you’re my son, you’re always welcome here, I know you get lonely!’ But he doesn’t! He doesn’t! I miss Jason. This sandwich is so good. Thanks cousin.”

Mikey, who’s been working there for about a week, stares at the 300 dollar tip for a straight 30 minutes, wondering who Jason is.

From then on, the flock multiplies.

POV you’re cousin Mikey and Red Hood just walks in while you’re closing, covered in blood, and Spoiler’s leg is broken but she really wants a meatball sub, Signal asks why they upped the prices on the pizza, Orphan stares and nods her head and oh my god that’s an 8 year old with a sword:

[cassiebird]