#sorry i was doing research for some art i wanna make and this made me a lil insane

[retro-system]

i'm trying so damn hard to process my thoughts about future max cause. goddamn. imagine going one hundred years knowing that you're an alternative version of yourself in a different timeline, grieving a partner who's right next to you while that partner grieves you.

then, when the both of you are old and grey and your partner has developed dementia, an elevator appears in your office on your partner's birthday and out waltz the younger versions of both of you, and the more they talk the more you realise that the younger version of you is the version originally from this current timeline, and this is the first time you've ever met him. and he has no idea that in the near future, he is going to die and be replaced by you.

and your partner's no longer has the memory to recognise his partner or his partner's younger self -- let alone what timeline his partner's younger self's from -- and you can't tell them about any of this because how the hell do you explain something like that.

[bluegiragi]

I hate to ask this cause it feels stupid but I dont wanna do a bunch of research on whatever the recent cod mw fandom discourse is,

but I saw the reblog of someone accusing you of supporting people who write sexualized pedophilia and that really is personally my only """"moral"""" with nsfw shit, (I'm a patreon subscriber and ig I just wanna know where my money's going) is THAT true?

i used to follow an artist who, 5-6 months ago made racist art featuring gaz and soap in a slave context, which I didn't like, retweet or interact with in any way. they also made under-age art of ghost soap, which I also didn't interact with . people on twitter called me out yesterday, for retweeting (months before this incident) other art they'd made as evidence I stood by/encouraged/was an avid fan of all these tropes. The art I retweeted wasn't either of these previous examples of art, but one where ghost and soap were sleeping in a bed together, as adults, peacefully. I can't emphasise enough that I have not interacted with this artist at all, for over six months. The callout in question has framed me as a close friend of theirs when, in truth, our total timeline of interactions could probably be counted on one hand, and I haven't interacted with her in so long that I genuinely forgot I was still following her.

The crux of all is this is that I did not unfollow + block this artist earlier on when the racist art was posted months ago, and then I retweeted a fic tagged with "non-con" (ghost gets soap off in a context where he can't really properly consent, they're in front of a crowd of strangers and they have to fuck, but both parties are into each other) written by a friend as I wanted to support their writing.

The pedophile claims are because I retweeted a fandom bingo post that defended loli-con without reading all the squares properly, and then immediately un-retweeted it when I properly read it. All in all, the post was on my account for maybe a few minutes.

The zoophile claims are because people say i support someone who wrote zoophilic fic and called people slurs, and I genuinely don't know who they're talking about there.

The anti-asian racism claims come from the original accusers in the callout thread thinking that I made Horangi's eyes in the monster!AU sensitive as a way of making fun of Asian eyes. The real reason is because he's a cat hybrid in that AU and cats are sensitive to light.

I tried addressing all this in a casual way earlier on in a misguided attempt to sort things out more 'civilly', and responded to an ask talking about my "support" for the artist who drew the slave Gaz art by saying the fanart in question was tone deaf and in poor taste. It wasn't enough for some people, so I'm happy to say it clearly- yes, it was racist, and the reason why I didn't want to be more aggressive is because I didn't want to extend all this mess by throwing this artist directly to the wolves - I genuinely believed them at the time when they said that wasn't that their intention, and think they should've deleted the post at the time, but not unfollowing was a decision that I made. I know now upon reflection that it was naive of me, unwarranted and frankly irresponsible to take a stranger at face value and believe they had good intentions, when the act of not deleting the post in question was evidence of a lack in remorse. In the moment, I'd thought back to my own personal experience with a friend of mine who used an asian slur in my company, who later sincerely apologised and legitimately cleaned up his act after I gave him a second chance. It informed my choice to not unfollow at the time, but there's a difference between someone you know irl for months and a stranger on the internet you've interacted with a few times. I shouldn't have coddled them in my response, and I'm sorry for not treating it with the severity it deserved. It was callous, and stupid, and indicative of internal biases that I ever thought it was a light enough offence to "see through", and I deeply deeply apologise. I promise from the bottom of my heart to do better.

That's everything so far. I didn't unfollow an artist when I absolutely should've, which i'll always strongly regret. I also retweeted a properly-tagged fic on my clearly 18+ nsfw account. I've undone both of those actions now. I hope this can be the end of it.

[akanemnon]

I wanted to create a version of Frara/Squeezo in your style (which I really like) along with a possible form for the Dark World. I’ve made three versions of the same drawing, but now I don’t know which one to choose, so I’d love your opinion or advice as an artist. (I draw on physical paper because it’s easier for me that way.)

There’s not much to say about the "Light World" forms; I simply took the sprite of Frara/Squeezo and adapted it into a drawing. There are a few differences, but I’ll briefly mention them:

The color of the fringe changes: in the first version, it’s rainbow-colored because I thought it looked nice; in the second, it’s gray as a sort of contrast to the first one; and finally, in the third, it’s red, like the classic fringe of Kris and Frisk.

The color of the pants and socks, some details of the sweater, and the hairstyle also change. Lastly, in the third version, there’s a visible eye (to avoid making it look too much like Kris) and a kind of pseudo-nose (which I’m not sure came out well).

The Dark World forms are more interesting:

In the first version, I was inspired by a simple knight, and I used all the colors I had available, thinking it would look good that way. The skin is gray to resemble a doppelgänger in fantasy games (since Frara/Squeezo is a kind of "double" of Frisk/Chara).

The second version, on the other hand, is inspired by a dark wizard (it seemed cool), with white and gray hair. The cape resembles Chara’s shirt as a sort of parallel, since Frisk has a cape with colors similar to Kris’s shirt, and vice versa.

The third version is inspired by this image:

(Doppelgänger from Forgotten Realms).

In this version, I added a weapon, as I realized I hadn’t included one in the previous versions. If you’re wondering why I chose an umbrella as the weapon, it’s because I found this fan art during my research:

(Credit to: @Art-in-heart4va)

I thought it was a cute idea. Finally, I added a few minor details.

Bonus: If you’re wondering why there are red cross-outs on the drawings and why I scribbled on them, it’s because I didn’t want to ruin the drawing.

I tried to come up with a made-up name for Frara/Squeezo. In the first version, he was called John (literally the first name that came to mind...). In the second version, I called him Ulan (because it was the first name that started with “U” that came to mind. Why the "U"? Well, take the first letters of the names Frisk, Chara, and Kris, put them together, and you’ll figure it out (; ). Finally, in the third version, I gave up and still haven’t decided on a name for him...

P.S.: I’m sorry for writing such a long text, but these drawings are very close to my heart, and I wanted to specify every single detail.

Hi there! Thanks for showing me all this art and going though your thought process behind it. I couldn't help but cobble something together on my own, based on all these concept pieces. You might find bits from all designs in there. Also played around with the colors a little, because I do like me some color theory.

Anyway, I REALLY hope you don't mind! I don't wanna undermine your work!

[aliaology]

OBSESSED

SUMMARY: you and jack had been dating for around nine months now, and recently his ex has been coming back around. this causes you to go on a social media stalking rampage, and soon you become a little obsessed with her.

PAIRINGS: jack hughes x fem!reader

WARNINGS: social media stalking, shit talking exes, use of jenna and nicole (nicole is a real person tho!!! bratters gf), use of (y/n)

if i told you how much i think about her, you’d think i was in love. and if you knew how much i looked at her pictures, you would we’re best friends.

It wasn’t hard to figure out who jack’s ex was. The way he seemed to barely look her way when one of his teammates brought up the fact she was at the game. Instead of sporting a devils jersey, like she used to, she was wearing a rangers jersey, and holding a sign for a rangers player.

it also wasn’t hard to immediately become jealous of her when jack’s teammates talked about how she used to always show up to games. it almost made you feel.. belittled. especially because you had a job, you couldn’t always make jacks games, but he understood that.

by the time the game ended and you sat on a bench, waiting for jack, you’d already find yourself scrolling through her instagram. you looked at every picture, how she was such a pretty blonde. short, tan, blonde, the stereotypical puck bunny. but she knew puck.

for the next fifteen minutes— she stayed on your mind.

‘cause i know her star sign, i know her blood type, i’ve seen every movie she’s been in and god she’s beautiful. i know you loved her, and i know i’m butt hurt— but i can’t help it, no i cant help it.

of course as soon as you and jack got home, you began to search her up online. so invested in your research, when you and jack ‘went to bed,’ you carefully snuck out of the man’s arms and back to your laptop.

she was an actress, of course she was an actress. she starred in a few movies, she was amazing. you bit your nail before quickly exiting the tabs as you heard your boyfriend’s footsteps.

“baby what are you doing up? it’s 12:44, come back to bed.” he spoke, hand rubbing his eyes.

you stood up from the stool and walked over to him, your body pressing against his as your arms wrapped around his torso.

“sorry love, i was just finishing up work.” you lied.

jack just hummed and the two of you went back to your bedroom. your mind began to cloud with thoughts, thoughts of her and jack. did jack treat her the exact same way he treated you? was anything special or was it shared? you know he loved her at one point, but now he loved you, so why stay butt hurt?

i’m so obsessed with your ex, uh huh. i know she’s been asleep on my side of your bed, and i can feel it. i’m staring at her, like i wanna get hurt. and i remember every detail you have ever told me, so be careful baby. IM SO OBSESSED WITH YOUR EX!

it was the second game against the rangers, this time and away game. the blonde was sat in the regular stands while you were in the WAGs suite. you could see her from where you sat, and your eyes burned holes in the back of her head.

thats the woman who had jacks heart before you, the woman who slept on your side of the bed, the woman who cheated on him twice. oh you knew a lot— especially from what jack told you.

“she cheated on me with some guy on the rangers— a real work of art, both of them.” jack told you.

you didn’t realize you were zoning out until nicole, one of the other WAGs, placed a hand on your shoulder.

“you alright there lovie? you seem to be staring at something down there a little too hard.” she asked.

your eyes flickered to her. “yeah im fine— just zoned out. when i get too excited it happens.”

nicole smiled. “well— hopefully our boys can kick the rangers ass. im tired of jenna constantly texting me to rub it in my face that we lost. im not even her friend.”

jenna was jacks ex. that was her name, jenna. she was still texting some of the devils girls? even after everything? you almost laughed, but instead you out on a confused look.

“jenna?” you pretended not to know her.

“oh shes jacks ex— we can’t stand her, especially after what she did to the boy.” nicole told you.

good to know.

she’s got those lips, she’s got those hips, the life of every fuckin’ party. she’s talented, she’s good with kids, she even speaks kindly about me..

the devils won, which called for a celebration in some random club. even though you were still in new york, people congratulated the team on the win. maybe they hated the rangers too, or they were islander fans. you didn’t really expect some of the rangers to show up though, and especially not jenna.

her lips popped with the bright red lip stick she adorned. her hips swayed with every step she took in that mini silver dress. in that moment, she became the life of the party. in that moment, you felt your hands wrap around your body.

that didn’t last for long though, especially not when jack was there. his body pressed against yours as you both danced to the music. his hands gripping your waist, your arms slung around his neck. the sloppy kisses he pressed to your jaw. you had this, she didn’t.

but she had to ruin it. “wow you are so pretty!” her voice rang out. this caused jack to slowly, irritatedly pull away. your hands fell down to his arms as the smile on your face slowly turned fake.

“oh thank you.. uh do i know you?” jacks hand squeezed your waist.

jenna gave a look to jack, which you caught, before looking back at you. “one of jacks exes. you are?” she spoke.

“his girlfriend.”

and i know you love me, and i know it’s crazy.. but every time you call my name, i think you mistake me for her. you both have moved on, you don’t even talk. but i can’t help it, i got issues, i can’t help it baby.

“(y/n), baby?” jacks voice rang through the apartment. your body tensed slightly as his voice, scared that maybe he said the wrong name and that maybe you were just another jenna.

“(y/n)? have you seen my shirt?” he spoke loudly.

you sighed through your nose, “which one?”

jacks footsteps padded on the floor. you hid a smile as you sat at the kitchen island. you expected him to speak, but instead his arms wrapped around you from behind, causing you to let out a laugh.

“well it seems to be right here, isn’t that right?” he pinched at the fabric that draped over your body.

you feigned a look of innocence. “oh, you meant this one?” you smiled.

“when did you put this one on, pretty girl?” he asked you.

“it was the first shirt i found this morning. i dont find it to be too endearing walking around naked.”

jacks lips met the side of your neck, as his hands ran up and under his shirt that you wore. “mm, i dont know, i think that would be pretty nice.”

you let out a laugh as your hand reached back to play with his hair. “and let some random people see me? no thank you.”

“i guess you’re right, wouldn’t want anyone to see whats for my eyes only.” he spoke.

you hummed, feeling his kisses move to your jaw and become sloppier. “lets take this shirt off you, shall we?”

your thoughts disappeared as he dragged you to your room. there was no way he didn’t love you, not after the way he just worshipped you. oh no, he was yours, but his ex was still someone who made you worry.

is she friends with your friends? is she good in bed? do you think about her? no, im fine, it doesn’t matter tell me, is she easy-going? never controlling? well-traveled? well read? oh god, she makes me so upset! im so obsessed with your ex!

as jack left for practice, you couldn’t help but wonder about his ex. the last few questions that ran through your mind. she wasn’t friends with nicole or any of the girls, but what about his friends? her and trevor followed each other, same with her and cole.

does jack think about her often? last night at the club she seemed to piss him off by coming up to you both, maybe thats all? maybe he thinks about how much he hates her? or maybe he misses her— oh god was she good in bed?

was she easy-going? you were easy-going. so who cared. never controlling? you werent that controlling, the only thing you didnt want jack doing was liking random models pictures, and that was a set boundary because he said the same thing about random male models or hockey players (besides friends of course— for the both of you).

god jenna barely did anything to you and she made you so upset. pissed— frustrated, made you wanna pull your hair out.

you were obsessed.

im unable to tag everyone!

TAGS: @slaythehousebootsdown13 , @lxnceclercs , @honethatty12 , @outrunangelss , @absolutelyhugh3s , @hockeyboysarehot , @lovinbarzal , @shadowsndaisies , @um-mads , @bqbylon , @whoreforthehughesbrothers , @Robloxlover2007 , @p3nislawd , @alexx-stancati , @queenmendes , @-eedwardss , @if-my-heart-bleeds , @love-like-woaah , @freds-slut , @sleepybesson , @love4lando , @equallyshaw , @bellstwd , @ivy-34 , @slafgoalskybaby , @hischierxx , @dancerbailey3 , @jackhughesily , @cstads-blog , @ru-kru , @sbrn0905 , @love4ldr , @loveforaugust

[purpledisastertwin900]

For all of the “Raph raised himself AND his brothers” fans out there I bring this train wreck of a thought (I’m a lil sleepy so sorry if it doesn’t make sense or if I repeat myself a lot-)

We do not in fact have any actual evidence that splinter was neglectful to the boys when they were little. In fact, we have the opposite.

All of these flashbacks indicate that Splinter acc spent a LOT of time with his boys-

With Mikey, he was obviously coached in his art, a smol child can’t paint like that no matter how talented they are so we can see that splinter put in the time/effort to get Mikey the supplies and teach him how to do it well. Which probably means he researched and learned it himself first, idk I just can’t really see Yoshi knowing how to paint/draw that well but that’s just a theory.

With raph and Leo, their lemonade stand is structurally sound: obviously not put together by an 8 year old, and there’s a lotta lemons lyin around that were probably a bit difficult to find, and just LOOK at their faces here they are definitely familiar with this kind of father/son shenaniganizing-also just LOOK at raph. That’s a happy child, one full of excitement and happiness, not a kid who had to grow up too fast. Also his dad is literally right there in the picture

And then with Donnie, I can’t really tell what he’s doing in the background (it’s a bomb) but what i take from that screenshot is that Donnie feels safe/loved enough to come to Splinter when he gets hurt. And Splinters taking care of him!! And, Donnie is wearing clothes, which shows that he went out and got clothes for them but also didn’t force the boys to wear them if they didn’t want to (see other screenshots lol) which also goes to show that he lets his boys choose who they wanna be and what they wanna do. At any point he could’ve forced all of them to train as ninja, at any point he could’ve made clothes mandatory, and at any point he could’ve forced them to drop things that made them happy like skating or science or art but nah. He was supportive every step of the way.

Now am I saying he was perfect? No. Am I saying he couldn’t have done anything better? No. What I’m saying is that Raph acc did not have to raise himself and his brothers. Splinter acc gave them a pretty good childhood, all things considered and it kinda makes me sad when ppl bash Rise Splinter or continue the neglectful parent trope. Again, I’m not saying he did everything right, he def could have spent more time with his kids on an individual basis and he should’ve been more present, but let’s cut him some slack bc he did a really good job at raising the boys. And he got so much better as the show progressed! But that’s another post lol. I’m also not trying to take away Raphs oldest sibling syndrome, he still def has that from being the leader and watching his bros while splinter was away-I’m just saying he didn’t have to do it ALL alone.

Look in the end he’s doing his best and his best was really good for what they had. He’s a good dad, he’s not neglectful.

[dootznbootz]

As someone who is also really uncomfortable with the Zeus/Odysseus art trend, I completely understand where your coming from!

People’s treatment of Odysseus’s assaults in general makes me really upset. Just the other day I saw a comment on a post saying that “Odysseus wasn’t loyal to his wife yet expects her to be loyal to him” and not once in the replies did I see someone mention that he was literally assaulted. It’s absolutely gross and makes me hesitant to go deeper into the fandom.

I remember being so frustrated when the snippets of “There are Other Ways” came out because so many people were making Hamilton jokes and talking about how he always talks about his wife yet cheated. When in the song it was so clear he was being coerced which is yknow, not a form of consent. I couldn’t even listen to it because it made me so uncomfortable, and even now with the full version out the fandoms reaction to it overall have soured me to it. Which sucks, because I do think it’s a great song.

Also I don’t even think Epic completely erases Calypso’s assault? At least, I think it’s left ambiguous enough during the time jump that people can come to their own conclusions. Specifically when Calypso says “Soon into bed we’ll climb and spend our time” just really gives me the impression that something else happened.

I suppose in the snippets we’ve seen of “I���m Not Sorry For Loving You” it seems like Odysseus and Calypso are on slightly friendlier terms, but I don’t think that negates the fact she could’ve assaulted him. And I’ve always took that song as pretty manipulative on Calypso’s side, with Odysseus more so trying to placate her. But that’s going into theory territory.

And even if he isn’t SA’d in Epic it’s pretty clear he doesn’t want to be there!! Same with Homer’s Odyssey. It’s so infuriating to see the cheating narrative be so widely spread when that is just not what happened.

Anyway’s sorry for the long rant, but I wanted to say that it’s nice to see you take Odysseus’s SA seriously. It’s not something the fandom does enough.

It's okay for the long rant. Sorry I took a bit to get to it but I wanted some "soft chatters" for a bit before I tackled this one :)

"Just the other day I saw a comment on a post saying that “Odysseus wasn’t loyal to his wife yet expects her to be loyal to him” and not once in the replies did I see someone mention that he was literally assaulted. It’s absolutely gross and makes me hesitant to go deeper into the fandom."

I completely understand you with this stuff. ;~; I used to go through Odyssey tags often as I LOVE possibly finding new people to follow and fun things but too many times I would see shit that pissed me off. ;~; I've honestly kind of just stuck to my mutuals that I trust tbh. And honestly, there's soooo much shit of people just straight up not understanding the context/culture/meaning/etc. of the Epics and just taking it at face value and not understanding the meanings. :/ I'm no expert, but I also have analyzed and researched quite a bit on my own to try and get the full picture. I think in order to truly enjoy the Odyssey, you need to just... really soak shit in, you know?

When Calypso, that lovely goddess,  tried                           to keep me with her in her hollow cave, longing for me to become her husband,                                  or when, in the same way, the cunning witch Aeaean Circe held me in her home filled with a keen desire I’d marry her, they never won the heart here in my chest.

(Book 9, Johnston)

Odysseus tells this to the Phaecians. They are strangers that he will likely never see again and who are isolationists. Therefore his story that he told probably won't be "spread" to others so he can probably say whatever. So he doesn't have to worry about "Penelope hearing a different story than the one he told to her" if people wanna argue about how "Oh well, he didn't tell Penelope about the 'affairs'"(He tells her everything as well btw.)

He could literally say "Oh yeah, I had the time of my life!" but he doesn't because that's not true. Odysseus has no listed concubines, I just literally don't see him as the type of guy who's really into that.

And while yes, he would be devastated if she didn't "stay loyal", he does sound like he'd be understanding. He asks his mother in the Underworld if Penelope had gotten remarried to "the finest of Achaeans". And we all know of Odysseus' words of "when Telemachus has a beard, feel free to remarry". Even when first "rejected" by Penelope in that she didn't hug him when he sat across from her, he was incredibly hurt but asked for a separate bed. He literally could have had it where Penelope takes a different bed and he takes their luxurious/fancy one because he has the rest of the household on his side.

But he DOESN'T!

Because he adores her for fuck's sake!

Funny enough? I have the weird reaction of like, weirdly searching out "Good" animatics as it was a weird reassurance of "yes, people see that it's wrong." as while holy fuck. so many stupid, awful jokes about "Say No to This" in the comments (I have learned to just stay the fuck away from youtube comments on Odysseus shit. :') ) but like, seeing and HEARING how yes, this was fucked, was weirdly really nice for me. yeah, it took a lot of digging but there's a few "There Are Other Ways" that I love. Literally, both are unfinished wips and they're still my favorites. If you can, please give these two a watch and some love for the creator.

This was back before we heard the full song and it's still very good. How he's on guard until she "magics" him and the colors change. After that he kind of moves like a "puppet" but he's still resisting as best he can.

This one is literally still sketches but it's my absolute favorite. Oh my word. The body language, PENELOPE FLASHBACKS!!! Showing cute bits of Penelope's character and how awful this is for him. (Penelope is so cute. She puffs up her cheeks to make him laugh!) How he really is scared that he'll have to go through with this in order to save his friends until all his past trauma floods back and he just can't. It's lovely.

And yeah Idk how to feel about "I'm Not Sorry For Loving You" :/ I don't know how it'll be yet, maybe there's something in another song that shows Odysseus' real feelings or whatever.

And with just the whole cheating thing, yeah, it's really upsetting to call what is blatant assault "cheating". As wild as it sounds, Odysseus' story has been more relatable for me than any other stories like this, even modern ones. I've spoken a bit about it before but yeh, victim blaming at its finest. I find him and his story and his love for Penelope slkdfj very relatable. It's honestly really nice to write about in a sense..

(I'm pasting this from an old post of mine but yeh)

I have never had a story that felt like how it actually FEELS. The "aftermath" and "regaining life". It's hopeful and feels really good. It's been years since "everything" but it just felt nice to see "Everybody has the chance to get better." Even Nestor, Helen, and Menelaus, while still dealing with their traumas, are doing a lot better now. And after literal hell, Odysseus got to be with his family and loved ones again. He can start living again. It's why I'm just...idk passionate about this? I'm not a murderer or a war veteran but I see myself in him. Hopefully, y'all see me as nicer though!😂(plus, let's be honest, the Odyssey is romantic af and OdyPen is right up my alley as well >:D )

I really hate the whole "he's a guy so therefore ____" whether it's used as a "Boys will be boys. they can't help themselves" usually aimed at female victims or a "Men always want sex. they cannot be victims.". It's fucked up and used against ALL of us. :( Doesn't matter if it was history. People, no matter the era, should never be put through "Are you Victim™ enough?". He is one.

Idk the Odyssey means a lot to me. I hope it's okay I take some liberties with my fanfics as it's nice healing through him :D I AM kind of using my own experiences and ideas and it feels nice. I don't think Homer necessarily meant for this but eh, anything that helps is good :D He's a war criminal that I relate to.

[sun13koi]

another vent uh it’s nothing major so I’ll put the cws I think might be needed just in case. No tags this time.

Cws for possible mentions of yelling, self expression suppression, mockery, copying, etc

In my family, it’s like I can’t do anything without a shitty half baked copy of it coming from my brother. TV shows? He has to watch them too. Friends who are at least twice his age? Too bad, his friends too in his opinion. Not even the stuff most kids find weird- therian masks and quadrobics? He’ll look like shit doing both, and won’t stop bragging about it. It feels like a mockery to my life, every time he copies me. He’s even flirted with my fucking boyfriend, who’s twice his age??? Wtf???

So as you may know, I got converse the other day. Y’know, the shoes that are popular because of art, embroidery, beads, and painting on them? That I bought specifically to do these things? My mom called it ‘ruining’ them. Like what? I’m sorry? First of all, I didn’t even do it on the fabric part of the shoe that would make it unable to be worn with the supplies I own. I painted on the white bits and the bottom. Also- I painted things that express ME. I painted trans flags, the paw lines on the top, theradelta(◯⃤), quotes, etc to express MYSELF- what I like, what makes up me, and what COMFORTS ME- and she called it ruining them. Now sure, If it were any other kind of shoe, if I hadn’t mentioned it before hand several times, if I hadn’t asked for permission, etc- I could see how it would VAGUELY be seen as that. But come on. This just felt like you were saying that my personality, beliefs, and lifestyle ruined me as a person, despite all of them being harmless. And to make matters worse, she’s even more upset because my brother who has NO sense of ‘just bc they did it doesn’t mean I have to’, decided to draw blobs that I can’t even recognize as things on his brand new Nikes.

Mine cost 20 and were an after thought. His cost 50, and he got two pairs. But when I craft on the thing I got to craft on, it’s RUINING them. Heh. Thanks, mom.

and if it were just this, I might have been a little upset, but this isn’t the first time, hence the examples I gave previously

and now despite me already doing all the research, she’s not letting me get a binder either. Even though we have a place that would give them out for FREE with CORRECT SIZING. I really don’t want to sound like a brat or picky. But is it just me, or does this feel really suppressing? I felt lucky I could get a camp halfblood shirt without her reading g every single Pjo book first.

In summery, my mom just indirectly called my self expression a waste of time, effort, and a pair of shoes, my brother can’t form an original idea and it’s made me possessive over everything and everyone I love, and I don’t know what to do <3

If you read this, uh… thanks. It means a lot to me that you’re willing to listen to this shit

and if you’re my online dad uhhh sorry for not just ranting to you like usual I don’t wanna ruin your ren faire day

EDIT: here are some photos of the ‘ruined’ converse. It doesn’t matter what she thinks since they make me extremely happy, but I just think it adds to the overall madness I feel like she has

There are lyrics from the moon will sing on the front but I couldn’t get a good photo. Everything involved I did myself and is incredibly personal to me, and I was so proud of how they turned out. I also TAUGHT MYSELF how to lace on the beads without tutorials. So yeah. Thanks for encouraging my creativity and expression, mom.

[yelenasdiary]

Little!reader request! CG/sisters Nat and Yelena

Just a bunch of fluff of reader and her cgs who happen to be her sisters from the red room watching bluey together

Family Time

Pairing: Caregivers! Natasha Romanoff & Yelena Belova x Little! Reader

Summary: After finally getting you to settle down after a sugar high, your older sisters sit and watch your favourite cartoon together.

Comfort | No Warnings | 0.7K | 

AC: I’m Australian and I’ve never seen bluey, lmao. But I hope you enjoy this x also, please note, I am not a little and I write this purely based of research. If I have said anything incorrect, please don’t hesitate to message me via DM or asks. 

It was Yelena who had given you some soda in your sippy cup, maybe a mistake when she noticed how hyper you had gotten but it was hard for her to say no to her younger sister when you gave her your signature puppy eyes. She tried everything to get you to settle down before Natasha would return from the store, but nothing worked to keep your attention. Sitting down in the living room, surrounded by your toys and favorite plushies, she offered to do some arts and crafts with you. 

"But can't find crayons!" you pouted as Yelena placed your coloring book on the table. "Well, when was the last time you had them?" Yelena asked, unsure of where they'd be. 

"Sissy took them!" you replied, crossing your arms across your chest. 

To Yelena's relief, Natasha walks through the door with a welcoming smile. "Sissy! Where's crayons?" you asked as you sat down at the coffee table and opened up your coloring book. "If you're going to ask like that, you won't get them" Nat replies with a raised brow, reminding you to use your manners. 

"Sorry" you pouted, "can I please have my crayons?" you asked once more. 

Natasha whispered to Yelena that they were on top of the refrigerator. She had placed them there to stop you from chewing on them, snapping them in half or drawing on the walls. Yelena grabbed them and placed them in front of you before grabbing another one of your coloring books to join you. 

"Thank you Sis!" you smiled before grabbing an orange crayon. 

Natasha made peanut butter sandwiches for lunch, cutting off the crusts for you otherwise you wouldn't eat it. She filled your sippy cup with apple juice and placed it on your small plastic table. 

Since your older sisters saved you from Red Room, they've learnt a lot about you, things they didn't know before and together, they work as one to help give you everything you need. They love you more than life itself, you're their baby sister so anything you need, they'll do it. 

Given the events that took place in Red Room it was no surprise that your Psychologist informed your sisters that you age regress as a form of dealing with the trauma of Red Room. Both sisters did their research and they best to make sure you always felt comfortable and safe when you were feeling little, some days were harder than others. 

"Are you ready for lunch?" Nat came into the living room with another soft smile, you nodded before you realized how hungry you were then raced to your table. Natasha chuckled, "somebody is hungry!" she commented as she and Yelena followed you into the dining room. 

It was important to them that when you were feeling little that they help create a whole different childhood for you, everything mattered, even to the tiniest details. Mealtimes were to be eaten in the dining room as a family and there was a routine, they followed that they learned you loved and reacted well too. 

"After lunch wanna watch bluey" you spoke after taking a bite of your sandwich. 

"I'm sure we can watch bluey before your nap" Yelena replied, Natasha nodding in agreement, "do you want to change into your bluey shirt beforehand?" Nat asked. You nodded with excitement. 

For your birthday, Yelena had a shirt made just for you of your favorite Bluey character. The shirt brought you plenty of comfort and joy and you always wore it when you would watch the show. 

After lunch, Nat helped you change into your Bluey shirt before you both joined Yelena on the sofa who had already got Bluey ready. You made yourself comfortable between your two sisters, resting your head on Natasha's shoulder as you began to suckle your thumb. Yelena pressed play and watched as your eyes instantly lit up. 

Plenty of chuckles were shared between the three of you as you grew more and more tired as it came closer to your nap time. Yelena reached for a throw blanket before throwing it over the three of you. After a handful of episodes, you were softly snoring with your head still resting comfortably on Natasha's shoulder. 

The two older sisters smiled softly at one another, finally able to have family time like they had always dreamt of.

Taglist: @red1culous | @bentleywolf29 | @jeyramarie | @lissaaaa145 | @high--power | @parkerdaramitzzzz | @mmmmokdok | @wackymcstupid | @kiwiana145 | @valiantmugcowboyscissors | @observeowl  | @nattyolw | @ripofflizzie | @get-the-fuck-outta-here | @goofy-goonie | @makegoodchoices | @apollo2907 | @marvelfan98 | @wandaroman0ff | @dumb-fawkin-bitch | @lovelyy-moonlight | @santana1437 | @fluffyblanketgecko | @puta1 | @inluvwithfictionalwomen | @tintedrose12 | @jaymieflorissssssss | @tita001 | @youralphawolf72 | @crescent-witch | @randomnessbecausewhynot | @natashamaximoff69 | @a-dorkier-book-keeper | @hehehehannahthings | @secrettoallofyou | @romantic-slaps-on-the-asss | @marvel-fan-2021 | @mmmmokdok | @riveramorylunar | @ripofflizzie | @toldthatdevil | @itsmv3 | @katiemay-025 | @maria-403 | @boredandneedfanfics | @wandamaximoffspuppup | @xox-little-troublemaker-xox | 

[rileyclaw]

Hii! First off i just want to I'm such a big fan of your art and animatics! Your art is just so expressive and unique its addicting to look at 💞💞

I was wondering if you could go over how your process or tutorial in making an animatic? Whenever I try to start to make one, I get jumbled up and end up ditching it lol

I'm sorry if you get this question a lot 😭

So sorry it took me so long to answer this- I was in a Busy time (diseaseridden with covid and being punched by finals) when I got the ask and wanted to answer it with some stuff Im using for my next TOH animatic!!

I'll say one thing first: I get jumbled up and ditch so many animatics. For every one animatic I release, there are three to five more I have that have NEVER seen the light of day (yet). And that's okay!! It's fun just to make them for me, and I hope it is for you too!! Animatics are scary because if you're working on it alone, it can be really hard to be your own cheerleader to keep up the mojo to keep going. So that makes it really special when there is that project that makes it to the finish line- cuz you can look at it and go "holy crap I made this. holy crap i MADE that look how SICK that is dude!! all that work and look at the turnout!!"

The following stuffh is just my personal process and is by no means representative of a professional animation pipeline, but this works for me as a Lonely Artist! It all begins with the idea - whether it's a song, or just a story you wanna tell. In the case of the one I'm gonna demo here with , I wanted to animate Hunter's first day as Del's apprentice!

The first thing I did was write a script. Not fancy or AO3-quality, but enough that I understand the pacing and the visuals of each shot. I usually just put this in a doc or put it in a script format, if I feel fancy.

Then, I take that script and find music that I think would fit for it- and remix it (if needed) to fit the pacing/mood/etc! This is what this new animatic looked like before I began ANY artwork- this is a me thing because I'm super inspired by audio as opposed to visuals first. But you might be different- this is just how I like working personally!

Then begins the research! I find references for characters, background layouts, and create a style guide for the animatic that tells me how thick lines will be for characters, backgrounds, if there'll be tons of value or no. I make a turnaround for each character so I can refer to them because Im gonna be drawing them over and over a LOT and want to be consistent! Luckily TOH has no shortage of references, so I based my work off them.

THEN, I can begin drawing. I'm a little,,, (a lot) ADHD and may not always do this process, but if you're new to animatics or daunted by the task at hand, make beat boards of the entire project.

This is just a page of rough thumbnails that get your visual idea down - look how rough and quick these are!! I try not to spend over a minute on each beat board if I dont have to, unless it's a particularly complex shot.

When it gets to the stage where you're ready to begin the actual scenes, I personally tend to do backgrounds first because I like to set characters into backgrounds - and for every animatic, I have the Awkward Blue Sketch Stage which is basically my beat boards timed out as an animatic.

I used Storyboard Pro for this (Toonboom, not free ): icky), but the process can be replicated across most art platforms in whichever way you feel most comfy with! This is so I can time the drawings before I devote time cleaning them up-- which can make for some Pretty Funny looking little guys but theyre important!! trust!!

Once a big sequence of shots is cleaned up (I usually do 40-60 second chunks at a time), I export the .mov and send it to my editing program (which in this case is still Premiere Pro) - and then repeat this process again and again until.. it's done??

Here's like a TL;DR list of basically everything I said summed up:

• Make a loose script or bulletin of the idea! Do your research!

• Depending on what kind of animatic you're making, time it to music!

• Make a beat board of very loose gestures for your shots, and time them - then move on to refinement & cleanup!

• Combine all shots, refine music cues and timings, add any last needed VFX, and export!

There's no secret recipe or anything, it's just learning a pipeline that best suits you, whether it is for something professional or something you want to make for fun because you just love to make!!

[capn-twitchery]

I'm sorry did I see you say you did your masters' thesis on character design? could you tell us more? 👀

YES ABSOLUTELY thank you So much for giving me an excuse to go off about this oh my god--SO!! 👀

my masters was on animation, specifically concept art & pitch bibles for animation (i'm not sure how well known those are but basically it's a document/book you bring into a pitch, contains all the basics of the show!) so it focused around making an animated show concept, a pitch bible & a visual development portfolio (just a fancier way to display more concept art) & the thesis (was supposed to) document the thought process behind making it

it was classed as a science masters, which meant the project had to be based around a hypothesis, so things got Muddled (hypothesis was on the rarity of adult horror in western animation) but the core of it was: i wanted to make a pitch for a fake tv show and write about character design & analyse art styles. so i did! there was stuff on stereotypical design traits & what they imply, environmental storytelling, how to show story through character design, how genres affect art styles & why, stylising animals for animation, sticking to historic research vs visual shorthands/readability, off the top of my head.

i will spare you hours of ramblings BUT i will not spare you the chance to show off some of the stuff i made >:3c the show concept was an 1800s (vaguely) southern gothic horror vibe, i went for anthros bc i had never tried them before and wanted something more challnging than humans. story concept was based around ergotism, mass hysteria, unreality, weird creatures in the fields that may or may not be real, power struggles, etc. etc.

the pitch bible i am still so Unbelievably proud of--i made everything basically from scratch myself, drew so many things i'd never even Attempted before, and although i'd change a few things now (mainly the writing/formatting) i'm still proud of it! i think the visitants pag is the coolest thing i've ever made still >:3c here's a handful of pages, and i'll put a few of the visual development portfolio ones under the cut & the links to the full things if anybody is interested!!

i never did get to finish the visdev portfolio bc of a bunch of health issues + a surgery, which is a shame. i do still really like this project tho and i'm immensely proud of getting the degree even through the Fuckery 😌

i'd love to come back to it someday, there's a lot of things i'd like to change now i'm not under a time limit (better historical reference, for one) but it's the first uni project i've still felt passionate about after submitting it, so thank you for giving me the chance to talk about it :D

if you did wanna see the full pieces, the pitch bible is here and the portfolio is here (albeit unfinished)

[whumpsday]

Power Play

Writing Masterlist

content: kidnapping, ritual sacrifice, begging, hand whump, impalement, mouth whump, knives/skin carving, demon whumper, creepy whumper, major character death, gore

this is my piece for @zineofgid !! this was such an awesome project to work on :)

you can still buy the guys in distress zine here! proceeds go to the charity RAINN. there are limited physical copies and unlimited digital copies, as well as some merch left. do keep in mind that while my piece is sfw, this is an 18+ zine and a lot of other contributors' pieces are very much NOT sfw!

this piece was done as part of a collaboration with @whump-queen, with ocs we made together! he made art that accompanies this piece, you can view it here! it depicts the end of the story so you might wanna wait til after you read it though if you care about spoilers (also linked at the end)

-

Jonah’s breaths came hard and fast as Reese dumped him out of the large duffle bag, onto the cold floor of his basement.

He immediately tried to struggle to his feet, but his wrists and ankles had been bound with way too many layers of duct tape, making it impossible. Reese easily kicked him to the floor, placing a boot firmly on his chest and keeping him there.

“Ah-ah-ah.” his captor tutted, ripping the tape off his mouth. “I’m sorry to say that you will never see outside this room again.”

“You’re crazy!” Jonah screamed, unable to keep the terror out of his voice. His heart hammered in his chest, right under Reese’s boot.

“You have been messing with my campaign.” Reese countered, as if kidnapping was equivalent to Jonah doing his damn job. “Arnett didn’t start climbing in the polls until she brought you on as manager.” He dug his boot in deeper, making it a little hard for Jonah to breathe, pressing his bound wrists painfully into the floor under his back.

Despite admittedly-minimal efforts to retain his composure, Jonah found himself trembling. “So, what? You’re going to- kill me?”

There was no way he could fight this man off. Reese was bigger and stronger than him; it was pathetic how little he’d been able to struggle when Reese had initially incapacitated him. Now he was bound with tape and at an even bigger disadvantage. The thought that he could really die here blared through his mind like a siren, urging him to do whatever he could to escape, as if there was anything he could do.

“Not exactly. I’m not going to kill you.” Reese finally stepped off Jonah’s chest, only to kick him over and press a knee into his back instead. “Don’t mistake this as petty vengeance. I needed someone, and you happened to be an enticing target.”

It was only then, staring across the floor instead of at the ceiling, that Jonah noticed his surroundings.

A large pentagram, easily five feet, laid painted red in the center of the room, a hammer and nails set next to it.

“What the fuck?” he whispered in cold horror.

“Thanks to you, it’s clear that a good, honest campaign by a good, honest man isn’t enough to make it in politics. Luckily, there are other ways to get ahead in life, if you do enough research,” Reese explained, like it made perfect sense.

“Is that blood?” Jonah asked, voice small, staring at the red of the pentagram painted meticulously into the floor.

“It is. My very own.”

Jonah’s line of questioning was instantly interrupted when felt the side of a blade against his forearm.

He writhed, his struggles renewed. “Get away from me with that thing!”

“Hold still, or I might nick you. You want that tape off, don’t you?” Reese leaned down. Jonah could feel his breath on the back of his neck as Reese’s knee pressed further into his lower back.

Jonah went still, barring the tremors he couldn’t control. As much as he hated to admit it, Reese was right: aimlessly moving around with a knife millimeters from his skin would only get him hurt. He didn’t resist as he felt steel slide harmlessly against him, the layers of tape cut away and peeled off.

Before he could even think about running, Reese grabbed both his newly-freed hands and dragged him over to the pentagram. Jonah started struggling again, but there was little he could do against the iron grip.

Reese pointed to one of the triangles making up the pentagram. “You will kneel or I will make you kneel.”

He didn’t know what else to do, and pissing off his captor seemed like a recipe for disaster, so he knelt as indicated.

Reese bound one hand to Jonah’s body with more tape, bringing the other to a point of the pentagram. He pressed Jonah’s palm against the star’s tip, stepping firmly against his wrist to hold it there.

“Now, stay nice and still.”

Reese picked up the hammer and one of the nails.

“What are you doing?!” Jonah tried to pull his hand away, but Reese just pressed his boot down harder.

“What I said. Just making sure you stay still.” Reese positioned the nail in the center of Jonah’s hand, the sharp tip pricking at his skin. Jonah’s breath grew rapid in anticipation of what was about to happen to him.

“Wait, don’t, don’t don’t no no no-!”

Pain exploded in his hand as the THWACK of the hammer hit the nail and pierced his skin, and Jonah finally screamed. He tried again to pull his hand away, to pull his whole body away, but it was useless. He was trapped.

“Stop! Stop stop stop, you’re crazy!” he cried, tears spilling over and running down his face. The nail settled on the floor’s surface, just barely poking through the tender skin of his palm from the inside, making its way through muscle and ligaments and tendons.

“You can think what you like. Doesn’t matter to me,” Reese commented nonchalantly.

The hammer came down again. Jonah’s second scream was less intense than the first, as if his voice itself were scared, breaking off into a sob. A few more taps left the nail buried snugly in the floor, the head resting against the back of his hand as a bit of blood escaped from under it.

Jonah panted hard, adrenaline coursing through him. His hand wouldn’t move from where it sat fastened to the pentagram even after Reese removed his boot from his wrist: even twitching his fingers sent a horrible jolt through it.

“Good job, you’re doing very well.” Reese praised, patting Jonah on the head. “And now, the other one.”

“NO!” Jonah cried. “Stop! You have to stop!”

“Shh, it’s okay.” The sheer calm Reese talked about it with sent shivers down his spine. “It’ll all be over soon.”

Reese freed his uninjured hand, and Jonah clutched it protectively to his chest, shaking. “Leave me alone,” he begged tearily.

His captor grabbed his hand and brought it to the opposite point of the pentagram, stretching him out painfully and forcing his head and chest to the ground. Much to his dismay, Reese stepped down on his other wrist and readied the hammer and nails again.

Jonah strained his neck to look up at Reese, desperate. “What do you want? I’ll quit, okay? I’ll stop running Arnett’s campaign, you’ll never see me again. Just stop.”

“Oh, Jonah. Like I said, I needed someone. It just happened to be you.” Reese started on the other hand. No matter how much he screamed, it wouldn’t stop. Unlike the first nail, which seemed to slip in between his bones, this one landed right on top of the small, delicate bones inside his hand and smashed through them uncaring, the pain blinding.

Jonah was a mess by this point, sobbing into the floor. “I don’t wanna die like this,” he sniffled.

Reese cupped his face. “Look at it this way. You’re dying for something bigger than yourself. More powerful. Now, I think that’s about enough complaining out of you.”

The grip on his face grew tighter and tighter, fingers pressing tightly into the sides of his jaw, until Jonah was forced to open his mouth. Reese grabbed his tongue and pulled it, touching it to the center of the pentagram. Even among the throbbing pain in his hands and the horrifying situation, Jonah’s face crinkled in disgust.

Reese grabbed another nail.

Jonah’s disgust was immediately forgotten, replaced by overwhelming terror. He tried fruitlessly to shake his head away, making what little terrified noises of protest he could manage, as Reese settled the tip of the nail against his tongue.

A whine of fear escaped him, and he looked up at his captor pleadingly. Please don’t do this.

“Just try to relax,” Reese advised, as if it was at all possible.

The hammer slammed against the head of the nail, sending it straight through Jonah’s tongue and into the floor. Jonah wailed with intolerable pain, hot tears slipping down his cheeks, no longer able to form pleas. All he could taste was his own fresh blood, running over Reese’s painted on the floor.

Reese gave it a few more firm taps until the head of the nail almost crushed Jonah’s tongue under it, undeterred by Jonah’s cries.

“There we go.” Reese disappeared from Jonah’s tear-blurry line of sight. A moment later, he felt the side of the knife against the back of his neck. He squealed in distress, unable to even thrash against his bonds anymore.

But the knife didn’t plunge into him. Instead, it glided downward to the sound of tearing fabric until Jonah’s shirt fell limply in front of him. Reese ran a hand over his exposed back, Jonah’s tense muscles shuddering under the touch.

“This is the final step.” Jonah jolted as best he could in his immobilized state as he felt the tip of the knife between his shoulderblades- not digging in yet, but threatening to.

“Nghh!” Jonah couldn’t say much else with his tongue nailed down. He couldn’t even shake his head. Nothing he could do to indicate NO would be enough here, anyway. Reese didn’t care for his opinion.

He screamed as the knife buried itself in flesh, not deep enough to touch bone, but far from shallow. It glided along his back in a sweeping stroke, before Reese lifted it and picked a new spot to carve into him, no matter how much he cried and tried to writhe away from the sharp, insistent pain.

Slice after bold, swirling slice, Reese painted a pattern in the splitting of his skin, spending the most time on an intricate design between his shoulder blades. Jonah was pretty sure it was supposed to be an eye, but he was too hazy with agony and blood loss to tell.

Finally, Reese pulled the knife away from his mangled back. “There, all done. Soon you won’t even feel it.”

Jonah could only sob in response, trembling from pain and fear. Everything hurt. His entire body felt like it had been through a paper shredder. He could feel the blood running off the sides of his back and pooling beneath his folded-up legs, soaking his knees.

He watched as Reese lit candles in a circle around him, painting the room in a warm glow, and began chanting in a language Jonah couldn’t understand- Latin, maybe? What a pointless thing to die for. What would happen to him when none of this worked and no demon showed up? Would Reese concede and let him go? Probably not. Jonah imagined the knife plunging into his chest, the last thing he ever saw the face of his murderer. At least the pain would stop.

Slowly, as Reese chanted, The sigil carved into Jonah’s back began to burn.

Just a little at first, but getting hotter and hotter until Jonah was writhing in pain, trying to free his hands despite the nails holding them in place and hurting worse and worse the more he tugged on them. What was happening to him? It felt like someone had run boiling oil through the gashes in his skin. It was unbearable. He needed it to stop. Jonah squeezed his eyes closed, releasing a sound akin to a dying animal at the excruciating pain.

When he opened his eyes… a figure stood in front of him, half-materialized, like it was creating itself out of thin air. The warm orange glow of the candles began to shift to a cold, too-bright violet.

He strained his eyes up to see, the angle much less than ideal with his tongue bolted to the floor. He wasn’t sure if that was the reason they looked so massive, or if they really were abnormally tall, but a glance at Reese for comparison proved it to be the latter.

Everything about them looked unnatural, all bright colors that might mark a plant or animal as toxic, screaming at his nailed-down body to run. Glowing fuschia markings slithered all over their skin, the pattern looking suspiciously like the one Jonah could feel carved into his back. A giant scorpion-like tail snaked out from behind them.

Jonah stared up at the- the demon, apparently. As their form became more solid, Jonah’s back burned less and less, the only thing he could possibly be thankful for in this moment.

The demon eyed him back threefold, an impossibly-wide grin full of sharp teeth splitting their six-eyed face. Jonah couldn’t help but whimper under their gaze.

“Izuloth!” Reese shouted, suddenly seeming so much less intimidating compared to the monstrosity before him.

Izuloth broke eye contact to direct their attention to him, their smile faltering and their eyebrow twitching with annoyance. Several of their eyes narrowed. “What?”

“I’ve summoned you! I’ve captured a sacrifice, carved your sigil, drawn this pentagram in my own blood. You will now grant me power, as promised,” Reese declared confidently.

The smile returned. “Awfully presumptuous, human. I don’t remember promising anything.”

“What- what are you talking about?” Reese sputtered. “That’s what it said in the book! You are now under my control!”

Izuloth smirked. “Oh, is that what it said. That was nice of them to put in there. Makes fools like you much more likely to summon me. Hm, I don’t think I care for your attitude, though.”

They snapped their fingers.

Jonah watched in horror as Reese’s body began to unravel in front of him. Skin peeled from muscle, exposing raw, bloody flesh and piling on the floor below in a wet heap that splashed Jonah’s face with blood- he could taste it on his outstretched tongue.

Reese tried to scream, but all that came out was a gurgle as his tongue joined the rest of his exposed muscles in shredding to bits, as if taken to on all sides, inside and out, with an invisible cheese grater. It was over within a minute: the remnants of his body collapsed to the floor, twitching with life for only a moment before going still.

Jonah was alone with Izuloth.

He whined in terror, too frozen to even try tugging at his restraints. If the demon could do that, it wouldn’t be any use anyway.

Izuloth, to his dismay, turned their attention back to him. “Now, where were we?”

They reached a hand down to pet his hair. Jonah squeezed his eyes shut, his entire body tensed up in anticipation.

Suddenly, Izuloth grabbed his hair and pulled. Jonah’s eyes flew right back open as his tongue ripped right out of the nail, bisecting it down the middle with an agonizing tear. His scream of pain cut short when Izuloth grabbed him by the frayed end of his tongue, their many-eyed face inches away.

“Pretty thing, I think I’ll keep you.”

-

ART BY AKIA WHUMP-QUEEN!!!

-

everything taglist:

@lilac-and-lemon-whumps

@t0rture-me

@whump-for-all-and-all-for-whump

@dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night

@whumpshaped

@pigeonwhumps

@the-scrapegoat

@whumpycries

one-shots taglist:

@icyheart-and-friends

@kira-the-whump-enthisiast

@whuarri

@reborrowing

[lunajanearabella]

๋࣭ ⭑⚝INTRO TO MY RP BLOG!!

((I do not own Ramshackle or the canon ramshackle characters on this blog, they belong to @zeddyzi so go support the creator of that masterpiece.))

๋࣭ ⭑⚝With that being said...

๋࣭ ⭑⚝𝓛𝓾𝓷𝓪 𝓙𝓪𝓷𝓮 𝓐𝓻𝓪𝓫𝓮𝓵𝓵𝓪 𝓑𝓮𝓻𝓻𝔂-𝓙𝓸𝓷𝓮𝓼 𝓕𝓵𝓸𝓻𝓮𝓼๋࣭⋆˚˖𓍢ִ໋🦢˚

Autistic

Same age as the scrap trio

INFP

Spanish & French

Female

She / Her / Hers

ℱ𝒶𝓂𝒾𝓁𝓎

Elena Jane Flores (Mother)

Daniel Berry-Jones (Father)

Mary Maximilian Hurtado (Step mom)

Josefina de el Monte Flores (Grandmother)

(Can't think of more names...TmT)

𝓕𝓻𝓲𝓮𝓷𝓭𝓼

Vinnie (More exactly her lover), Stone, Skipp, Sora, Zaria, Adi, Pebble, Maggot and the street cats.

𝓝𝓮𝓾𝓽𝓻𝓪𝓵

Tre, Maroon, Karma, Vinyl and Arville (sorry I Don't Know much characters)

𝓔𝓷𝓮𝓶𝓲𝓮𝓼

Ditch & his gang, Her father, maniatic lootbags and streetgangs!

𝓛𝓲𝓴𝓮𝓼

Reading

Researching about anything

Literature

The arts

Her hair

Her mom

Romance books

Her jewelry

Vinnie

Sewing

Fashion design

Her garden

Sneaking out

The "strange feelings" she's having and that she hates (the feeling is lesbianism and shell 𝄞♬♪have to stop the world just to stop the feeling♬♪)

Hiding things from her dad

Eating

𝓓𝓲𝓼𝓵𝓲𝓴𝓮𝓼

Violent street gangs

Snobby lootbags

Her annoying and weird suitors

Her father

Her step family

Mud

Itchy fabrics

Artblock

Her father finding out her secrets

Luna Jane Arabella Berry-Jones Flores, is my ramshackle sona and lover of Vinnie, She is a rich girl that has a mean and stuck up behavior at the start but slowly becomes sweeter, nurturing, nice and caringto more people, she's also very curious and since she decided to be different LOVES to learn new stuff, but please don't mess with her routine.

She starts off as mean and oblivious and naive as the others until one day she goes to one of the many ramshackle's next top sweetheart pageants as a guest for winning three times when she was a infant, and seeing a certain brunette scrap fight some lootbags, which somehow made her start to have "strange feelings" (she's gay and in love but she needs to listen to Chappell Roan to know that)

She then has more unexpected meetings with Vinnie that is basically Luna and Vinnie bickering, Vinnie pranking Luna in some way and Luna leaving confused, angry but also flustered at Vinnie's nature.

She then starts discovering herself and loses that obliviousness and wants to start getting to know scraps her and Vinnie slowly start becoming friends but always still with a tension.

The thing Luna still is oblivious with her feelings (GOOD LUCK BABE, YOU'LL HAVE TO STOP THE WORLD JUST TO STOP THE FEELING) and I think surely Vinnie thinks Luna is too good for her.

I didn't know how to make a intro for a blog so I took @small-world-au 's intro as a template (of course with their permission) so thankssssssss darling!

Here's some songs that remind me of Luna or her lady and the tramp thing with Vinnie.

(Maybe ill update this if I have more ideas)

Also Ramshackle is owned by @zeddyzi

VOICECLAIM: CASSIE "SKINS"

EDIT!

Luna after the occurrence with Vinnie she starts writing this tiny magazine, where she writes all the towns gossip, she obviously wouldn't be allowed to do this so she writes these tiny magazines with a alter ego called "Lady Amourville" and to not be discovered she also writes a bit of gossip about herself... At the start she writes only about the gossip between the rich folk but then as she becomes less and less ignorant she writes more and more about the scraps at a point where she writes about scraps equally if not more than the rich folk and it slowly becomes a testimony book and a way to show the rich folk that they're not so different from the scraps, that they all have they're dark sides, problems and love affairs and some metal and paper can't make them different from eachother. So it basically becomes a instrument to show her advancing as a character, and also that's it's heavily inspired in Lady Wistledown from "the Bridgertons".

(Maybe I'll start writing little chapters and things about her storyline in ramshackle and her romance with Vinnie, let me know if you'd guys like that and your completely allowed to make fan-things for the Ladytramp (Luna x Vinnie) ship and for my character, as long as you give me credit and also because I LOVE WHEN MUTUALS DRAW AND MAKE FAN-STUFF, FOR MY SELFSHIPS I'LL REBLOG YOU AND THANK YOU A MILLION TIMES LIKE A LITTLE GIRL RECEIVING A TRIP TO DISNEYLAND AND I'M SERIOUS!!!💕💕)

[xxx-ang3l-w1th-a-sh0tgun-xxx]

my new art teacher kind of judged me (i think?) for taking level 3 art (2 year course) instead of foundation art (1 year course). level 3 is equivalent to a-levels and i already did a-levels before starting college so i guess it's weird to continue at the same level instead of doing foundation BUT i specifically chose level 3 because it's a longer course and i wanted to chill and make friends and stuff without feeling too stressed so surely it's MY DECISION to do that and a new teacher who doesn't even know me shouldn't be judging me for my decision?????

also honestly I've come to the conclusion that I'm probably not going to be able to work, let alone work within the art industry (unless i just do commissions) because even just the idea of working is so terrifying and I'm so stressed and overwhelmed even now when all i have to do is go to college 4 times a week.

my decision to do my art course was never based on my plans for the future. i just wanted to do something i enjoyed for 2 years and try and improve my mental health and make some new friends (hasn't exactly worked out but that was the plan at the beginning) but I'm being made to feel bad about that?

everyone wants me to plan for my future and decide what job i wanna do and i need to get the right qualifications and whatever but honestly who actually gives a shit because it's not gonna happen for me is it? ffs I've had a full blown meltdown 2 days in a row about the tiniest of things. how will i cope with a full time job in under a year from now??

also I'm so fucking annoyed that i had to spend 2 weeks researching future careers and universities and it was all pointless and honestly upsetting knowing that's not even going to happen but college is forcing me to do all this shit and for what??

sorry for the massive rant and ik no one will actually read this (lol) but this is all i can think about rn and this is some stupid 4am post-meltdown vent that I'll probably delete at some point

[tallymonster]

Memories of Us chapter 10

| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 |

AO3

Okay first things first. Partial writing credit goes to @micropoe10 because she helped me write a good chunk of this. I owe you so hard bestie.

As always thanks to @cheesy-cryptid for allowing me to use their art as inspiration and for reblogging this. I literally would not continue this if I hadn't gotten the attention from them I did. So thank you thank you thank you ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

One last thing before I post the story. This has been the most fun I have had on Tumblr. All of the support and love I have gotten from my friends on the Astarion Brainrot discord has been so encouraging. I owe you guys more than I could ever express.

ALRIGHTY THEN. WITHOUT FURTHER ADO.

Tags: @justporo @satanicspinosaurus @sleepy-timaeus @tragedybunny @davenswitcher @wayward-hel (if you wanna be included let me know ❤️❤️)

 chapter 10. I caught fire

The day went on slowly. Octavia stared at the clock on the wall, the anxious feeling gnawed at her. Earlier, she had briefly seen Astarion at the end of the office corridors. He gave the same empty stare he has for the last few weeks. 

 

She stood in front of her office door, glancing down at the handle. She should go say something, it's been long enough. Octavia turns to walk towards him, but as she looks over, he's already gone. 

 

As she walked into the office, Gale was sitting on his desk going through a few things he was researching on his own. He tears his eyes away for a moment and slides a small red piece of paper towards her.

 

Another note. 

 

“You know at some point, you'll have to admit you fucked up, Octavia. This is all becoming a little childish isn't it?” Gale chided.

 

He put down his pen and sighed. “You're not the only one suffering here, it's so ridiculously obvious that you're both miserable. In the years I've known him, I have never once seen him be so quiet around anyone else. You, my friend, are a first in many instances.” he chuckles at the end of his scolding. 

 

“You two are so dumb sometimes, it makes for fine entertainment.” He smirks and continues to write. 

 

Octavia scowls a bit, “I’m glad my misery is so interesting to you, Gale. Do you and your mother gossip about us during your brunches?” 

 

Gale immediately stares up at Octavia, “Okay, I apparently hit a nerve…I’m sorry. Really, I am. You know I'm only telling you this because I care about you both? I hate that you're not speaking. Not only because it's unprofessional for me to be your note lackey, but because the others have started to notice. So I suggest you read whatever is on this note, and go fix it. For all our sake.” He shuts his notebook and walks up to the office door. 

 

“I’m going for a walk, I hope you can figure out how to amend this.” He steps out, leaving Octavia to sit in her own anguish. She fiddles around with the folded piece of paper before deciding to get it done and over with. 

 

She unfolds the little more and her whole soul escapes her body. The note sent with Gale only said "Office. Now." Well that's it, he's firing her, or demoting her, or even worse, nothing at all. 

 

Octavia made the long walk over to Astarion's office. She stands in front of the door, hesitant to knock.

 

The whole argument replays in her head like it has for the last few weeks, she should've knocked on the damn door. But no, like a petulant child she was only thinking petty thoughts.

 

As she lifts her hand to knock, she hears some banging on the other side. She presses her ear to the door and listens quietly. Nothing. Was he even in there or was he testing her? 

 

It doesn't matter in hindsight, he's got his reasons for whatever he called her here for. She softly knocks on the door, the sounds behind the door stopping immediately. "Astarion? I got your note."

 

On the other side of the door, Astarion quickly picks up the papers he's thrown everywhere. Thank the gods he still used that arcane magic Gale taught him while they’d sort through maps and scrolls during their adventures. Within seconds his thrashed space is as impeccable as before. He composes himself and takes a moment, the mask expertly back on. "Come in."

 

Octavia walks in, Astarion is standing with his back to her, facing the window. "Locked. I don't want any interruptions." He speaks in a curt tone, not turning at all. Octavia locks the door, nervously sitting on the chair across him.

 

Astarion slowly walks over to her, stopping in between her and his desk. He sits on the edge facing her, his eyes two sunset orange orbs glaring deeply into her. He takes a long breath before speaking, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have raised my voice to you like that. I hope we can go back to how we were before, I'm not angry anymore." 

 

Octavia's face is suspicious, her eyebrows furrowed, eyes turn into slits and she's taken back. "Hold on, you haven't spoken to me in three weeks, and you're apologizing? Why? Aren't you still furious with me? Are you okay?" 

 

Astarion scoffs a skewed scowl on his face."I'm trying to be open with you like you asked me to. Are you really going to get mad because I'm apologizing to you? What is wrong with you?" He asks exasperated, closing his eyes and rubbing the bridge of his nose. "Gods you are so infuriating you're just like-" he takes a sharp inhale, "Listen, I'm trying, okay? This whole being patient, kind, open communication sort of thing is still very new to me." 

 

He continues, "I'm willing to look past this little invasion, honestly I'm amazed that you of all people would be the one to sneak in here." He sounded impressed. "Either due to luck or stupidity, but you're the first to leave alive." He chuckled a dark sarcasm behind it. 

 

"Besides," he paused, shuffling his feet, clearing his throat, and pursing his lips, "I missed talking to you. Passing notes like we're school children isn't as fun or exciting when you're an adult and Gale is the one you're passing them through." He pouts softly, as if seeking some sort of playful pity.

 

"I find that hard to believe, you seemed to like those little notes. I had so many, I thought it was an excuse to keep seeing Gale?" Octavia mocked, giggling softly. "Can I be honest with you too? I mean since we're in the spirit of openness and all?" Astarion motions her to proceed, "I missed talking to you as well. You're fun to talk to and complain with." 

 

Astarion smirks and extends a hand towards her. "Then, may I offer my apologies to you? Will you let me air my sweet grievances and complaints to you?"

 

His voice dripped like warm syrup towards Octavia, his eyes had a sultry energy behind them which made her cheeks quickly heat up. Her mind is scrambling to react, but the only thing working on overdrive is her need to see how much further this could go. She decides to play into his dangerous game, one that she knows she will most likely lose. 

 

Octavia takes his hand and leans forward on the chair, "As long as there are no complaints about me, I've been working very hard to earn your forgiveness." She chuckles, smiling with her eyes, dragging her gaze slowly back to his own, inhaling quietly as she stares into those gorgeous golden sunset pools.

 

Astarion leans in mirroring her movements, "Well you have, if that makes you feel better. I'm willing to work hard too. If you allow me to-" she stops him from speaking, pressing a finger to his lips.

 

He's taken back slightly, his lips stay puckered on her finger and he takes his chance to kiss it gently, earning him a sharp inhale from her. 

 

"Honestly, an apology is more than I ever thought I'd get from you Astarion, no offense." Octavia laughs, she stands and removes her finger from his lips. She stands in front of him, and reaches her hand down to hold his again. 

 

He smiles and tucks a stray piece of hair behind her ear, gods she's even more beautiful up close. She breathes deep, allowing his touch. He caresses her cheek, gliding his hand down to hold her chin tilting her head up and looking her over. 

 

"You expect so little of me, how can I show you that I'm much more than that?" Astarion looks at her through hooded eyes, he was incredibly persuasive in the most benign occasions, and now that he had the invitation from her, he wasn't going to let that go to waste. He pulls her in closer, letting his arm rest on her waist.

 

He spoke so sweetly and Octavia wants to trust him, if he's willing to drop his guard, she can drop hers. "There's so much I want to tell you, but I'm afraid it will change your opinion of me." She spoke so softly, almost a whisper. 

 

Astarion's face turns to worry, there was a vulnerability he wished to share with her, how he did with Tav, they're so similar, this feeling is bittersweet and it terrified him. "Octavia, nothing can deter me. How intelligent, thoughtful, genuine you are..."

 

Octavia can't breathe, the words from his lips are so saccharine, like a forbidden fruit she longed to taste. "It scares me, the last time something like this happened, I ran from it, like a coward. I'm afraid of what it would do to you. The lengths I would go for someone like you." He confesses, she can sense the heartbreak behind the words.

 

His hand falls over the edge of her jaw sliding down and trailing it across her shoulder, up around her neck playing with the strands of hair that betrayed its styling, pulling her closer, his lips feather lightly across hers. Octavia's knees felt like they were about to give out, this is what she was hoping would happen in her garden, at the fundraiser, practically any time she saw him alone, he was so hard to understand but that made the appeal more undeniable.

 

"What if I wanted to find out? What would you do?" Octavia presses her forehead to Astarion's, her breath shuddering under the closeness between them.

 

Astarion chuckles "Curious little kitten aren't you?" His hand intertwined in her hair turns her head so he can lean in closer, his voice a low whisper in her ear "If you let me, I could drown you with my love. You would die a million little deaths each day. Allow me to show you." 

 

She felt his lips press against her skin. They were cool and soft, he could feel her shiver underneath his touch, a warmth grew inside that was boiling over both of them. The fire was certainly lit, but she had to be the one to control it before it became unstable.

 

Her hands shot up to his shoulders, stuck between pushing him off and entangling a hand in his hair. "Astarion, wait.." 

 

Octavia turns and looks into his eyes, full of hunger and lust, she takes a second to catch her breath. "I want this, but I want to take my time with it, I- I don't want to do anything to make you regret this. I really like you." Astarion's eyes grow wide, "I won't. I can't." His voice was soft, pleading almost.

 

One of Octavia's hands settles on Astarion's cheek, he settles into her touch and kisses the inside of her hand. His normally angular eyes are so round and soft, looking up at her, wanting. The vulnerability she was seeking on full display. He continues to kiss her hand, slowly going down her wrist. 

 

She continues to watch as he leaves a trail of languid kisses. As soon as he passes halfway up her forearm, she can't take it anymore. She pulls him in, kissing him, her whole body feels like it's floating and sinking all at once. She feels his arms pull her into himself, holding her closer as he deepens their kiss. 

 

One of her hands rests on his shoulder as the other snakes up to his hair, wrapping it in his curls. After a few moments he pulls away, placing a chaste kiss on her cheek. "You are going to be the death of me, and I welcome it with an open embrace." 

[biolizardboils]

Sorry to do this so suddenly, but I'm putting all my blogs on hold until further notice. I might log in to like or private-reblog some posts for reference, but that'll be it.

The short reason is that I wanna work on myself. Mostly personally, but with a side of visual art skills.

The long version is under the cut. Content Warnings: current geopolitical events, mental health.

So I'm writing this part for two reasons: so I can send it to friends and others when they ask what I'm doing; and to remind myself why I'm doing it, in case I'm compelled to come back too early. This is gonna be a ramble; I'm writing this after midnight, cus I'll forget or lose the nerve in the morning.

You likely already know what this is about from the emoji tag. You'll also notice that I won't mention any proper names in this post. That's one of the issues I'm stepping away to work on.

I've been quiet about it ever since it started, for a few reasons. Unfamiliarity with the history behind it, fear of spreading misinfo or propaganda, doomscrolling tendencies. For months, I've done the daily click and left it at that.

(Speaking of, last month I found out that the site doesn't track cookies or whatever its called? TL;DR: you can click as many times as devices you have. That's 3 for me.)

But anyway, this week it stopped feeling like enough. From this post's date and what I usually post about, you can probably guess what broke the camel's back.

And... I feel guilty that this is what broke it. And I feel guilty that I feel guilty. It's not my struggle; I'm a bystander. But I chose to be, and I can't tell how much of it was for my own mental health, and how much was denial, selfishness, misplaced optimism.

I want to believe people aren't so cartoonishly cruel. I want to believe people do their research before acting on or speaking about these things. I want to believe people can treat these things with the delicate nuance they deserve. I want to believe that one side destroying innocents on the other is inexcusable, no matter the historical context, and that the rest of the world's powers will act to stop it.

I'm scared of how much I still want to believe it, despite reality. I'm scared of how long it took me to feel the appropriate horror. I've had intrusive thoughts and pits in my stomach all week, and it's compounded by the guilt that I'm only having them now.

I still want to believe some things were misguided, or made before the situation, or will be fixed later. And I can't tell anymore what's a coping mechanism, and what's just a selfish hope that it'll all be fine.

So... I'm gonna get better coping mechanisms.

I'm looking for therapists. Not just for this, but some other things that happened to stack up this week. It doesn't take much to throw off my daily functioning, and I've been holding off addressing that. Again, it's horrible that it took something like this to make me realize that.

To fill up the spare time, I'm gonna put more work into my art skills. I can finally afford better tools, so it's time I practice more professional techniques.

So, yeah. I'm leaving because I feel I can't address things like an adult, and I hope to learn how before I come back.

Thanks for reading, and goodbye for now.

[auburnitzy]

Idk if anyone has ever told you this but I am stupidly excited every time you post something abt Nawa

I was never exposed to Filipino Mythology as often like Greek or Chinese. It kind of made me lose touch with the mythology my mom grew up on.

So seeing your character and the mythology she’s based off of really got me going to get into Filipino creatures :^D

aha!! same!! i don't really see much media of philippine mythology outside of the country, and i didn't want to accidentally offend people when i make a chinese oc because i made a mistake

below the (read more) option is some concepts and early designs of nawa!! (mostly me just rambling ab nawa's history as a character)

february 2022, the earliest known design of her was made in gacha club.

she wasn't filipino yet (chinese-japanese actually) and was named "yurei zhou"

i didn't even bother researching the last name because i was that ignorant.

we don't talk about this era because i am ashamed of it. what an embarrassing time.

if anyone is reading this i'm sorry for doing that :(

this was created march 4, 2022 according to my ibispaint x files, and is the very first naotian/lunarnoodles art i made.

by this time, i was simping for mk because i loved dorks (and still do to this day)

back then, she didn't really wear the sleeveless turtleneck thing, it was a black turtleneck dress (WITH SLEEVES!! 🤯) underneath a a short jacket/vest.

her name was also changed to "yue zhou" because at this point, i realized that "why the heck would i name her yurei zhou if i'm not japanese? that's weird."

i also haven't decided whether she was purely filipino or filipino-chinese

she had red shoes and frankly, i don't know why i chose that. honestly it was an eyesore.

next up we got a more-LEGO looking concept (dated march 8, 2022)

her name was changed to nawa (no last name yet), because i realized "wow, i am not chinese either!!" and said "FILIPINOFICATION BEAM ACTIVATE!!! 🇵🇭🇵🇭🇵🇭" and now she's turned fully filipino

for some reason, her horns also changed to black like thoma's from genshin.

by march 30, 2022, her horns had turned to gold with violet edges, with two slits. however, her shoes were still red, and had gold pins on her jacket.

she still had no bell because there was no backstory formed for her at the moment.

october, 2022 came, and i went "ooo i don't wanna misinterpret chinese mythology" so i turned to filipino mythology instead

her backstory used to be something like this;

"chang'e used to be best friends with an ancestor of nawa's (even gave the ancestor the bell as a gift), until that ancestor tried to eat the moon so the celestial realm banished that ancestor inside the bell and was passed down to her descendants. nawa tags along with mk in s3 to return the bell as an apology to chang'e because the ancestor had wanted to apologize and was haunting her descendants to do that for her"

obviously that's not the backstory and plans anymore, and lualhati (the ancestor) was eventually scrapped

her last name, "elyas" was eventually formed and taken from the character "elias" from one of jose rizal's (a hero in philippine history) book's noli me tangere, because at the time, a show called "maria clara at ibarra" aired at october 3, 2022, and i got so hooked on the show that i made her last name elyas.

then february, 2023 came and i was like "my gosh,,, her backstory is garbage,,," and revamped everything.

i wanted her to be more fleshed out, but i still didn't think of a full backstory yet-

and because I was impulsive and not thinking, i still made her a reference

late february, 2022 came and i said "so, she has bakunawa blood, right? why not give her a DRAGON FORM?"

at this point, i made her accidentally kill her sister (she was being silly and goofy guys) (YOU SINK INTO MY CLOTHES 🐺🐺🌙), made her despise her bakunawa heritage after that and gave her trauma (because that builds character!!!)

i also made her mother (who was originally kind in the fanfiction) into someone who blames her for her sister's death and be the one to give her the bell

and now we land here, early march of 2023, so i said "what if she actually recovered from that trauma i gave her? 👉🏽👈🏽 and what can i do to make her more associated with the moon?"

so the idea of mk helping her heal and love all of herself and her "imperfections" was born!!

(according to the wiki, mk thinks that there is perfection in imperfection, goofy lil dude <33)

her hair turned white because nawa came to love her bakunawa side, and because of that- she became more in tune with haliya's (the filipino moon goddess) side (who loved bakunawa so much to the point that it still resonates through her descendants.)

i also gave her fins, barbels and a tail cuz why not?

of course, her natural hair color is still brown/auburn, but it only appears when she's "de-powered" or something happened to take her powers away (it takes away her bakunawa features too)

and i think that's the stuff i can recall at the moment,,, i'll add more stuff once i remember