#so my posting schedule might fix??? HOPEFULLY

[frenchkisstheabyss]

♡ 𝕒 𝕘𝕚𝕣𝕝 𝕝𝕚𝕜𝕖 𝕞𝕖 ♡

♡ Pairing: boyfriend!jeongin x girlfriend!chubby!fem!reader

♡ Genre: fluff/comfort

♡ Summary: Jeongin's the type of boyfriend who never makes you question how much he cares for you. Still, there's one nagging insecurity you haven't been able to move past: Letting him see you naked. Sick of letting your fear get the best of you, you decide that tonight's the night to finally open up to him and it turns out you might've been afraid of nothing all along.

♡ Word Count: 2.1k-ish

♡ Warnings: body insecurities, nudity, a lil making out, mentions of sex, jeongin loves to touch your body, praise, and just all around fluffiness otherwise

♡ A/N: This started out as an anon request but I lost the post for that request (brb crying) so now we have a lil I.N comfort fic that will hopefully make my chubby Jeongin biased babes feel good in their skin cause you totally deserve to.

Moments like these Jeongin wishes could last forever. Between touring, appearances, and studio sessions his schedule’s been brutal lately, leaving him with little to no time to spend with the one girl he treasures most in the world—you. But tonight none of that matters. The world beyond the walls of his apartment doesn’t exist. There’s only him cozied up under a blanket on the couch with you cuddled against his body, your head resting on his chest as you lazily play with the strings of his hoodie.

The room’s dark except for the glow of the television. A movie’s playing but neither of you are truly watching it. His eyes are glued to you, committing to memory how beautiful you are from this angle. You seem so comfortable in his arms, so at peace, and the feeling’s infinitely mutual. 

Your own gaze is fixed on the screen but every image and sound you take in is passive. What you’re truly focused on is a thought that’s been cycling through your brain all night. Before you left to head over here you told your roommate not to wait up, you’d be spending the night at Jeongin’s place. Never one to pass up the opportunity to tease you, she asked if you needed to borrow a sweater or something to sleep in. You instantly regretted admitting to her over drinks that Jeongin has yet to see you naked, even after months of being together.

Whenever you have sex you keep the lights off and throw your clothes back on immediately after. If you shower and he’s around you always make sure to bring your clothes with you into the bathroom. Even Jeongin, who never wears anything to bed, always has something on when you sleep over to make you more comfortable. 

It’s nothing he’s ever complained about or tried to make you feel guilty for. More than anything he just seems happy to be with you, accepting your boundaries without hesitation. It’s one of a million reasons you’ve come to love him as much as you do. Still, you know that hiding from him isn’t something you can do forever. It isn’t something that you want to do forever.

“Baby” he says sweetly, petting your cheek, “You ready for bed?”

You take a deep breath, making up your mind that tonight’s the night. Your stomach sinks at the thought of how he might feel when he sees your body but at least you’ll know now before you fall for him any harder.

“Mmhmm” you nod, nuzzling your cheek against his chest one last time before sitting up. 

Jeongin hops up and gets to work clearing the snacks from the coffee table. With full hands, he leans down to plant the softest kiss on your lips. “You can go ahead. I’ll meet you in there in a second, okay?” 

You agree and gather the blanket in your arms, trembling as you shuffle down the hall towards the bedroom. It’s a short walk but it feels eternal. You’ve stepped through this threshold a dozen times by now but somehow this feels like your first. Suddenly the oversized hoodie and baggy sweatpants that once shielded your insecurities have you sweating like a sinner in church. It’s suffocating.

Tossing the blanket onto the bed, you tug your hoodie off to feel the fresh air kiss your skin. The coolness eases the tension in your body, leaving your hands a bit less shaky as you slip your sweatpants down and kick them aside. You stare down at your body, taking in the sight of your bare legs and your fluffy thighs that are just barely visible in the long t-shirt you’re wearing.

Your chest tightens as you pinch the bottom of your shirt, lifting the fabric little by little. It slides above your thighs, around the contours of your hips, revealing the panties you chose specifically for tonight. They’re silk, rose pink, with a lace trim and a delicate bow in the back and they’re the prettiest panties Jeongin’s ever seen simply because you’re wearing them. 

“Did I, uh, miss something?” Jeongin asks, frozen in the doorway.

Usually when he walks into the room you’re already under the covers waiting for cuddles he’s beyond eager to give you. Being met with this is something new entirely and he can’t help the way his heart races at the sight of it. You turn to find him staring at you wide eyed, shock painting his face. 

“Well, uh, I…” you stutter, fidgeting with the trim of your shirt, “I know you don’t really like sleeping with your clothes on and the weather’s really nice tonight so I thought, maybe, it’d be nice if we did that.” 

Jeongin closes the distance between you, his shock melting into concern. He brings an arm around your waist, stroking your side as he studies your expression.

“Baby, I already told you I’m cool with our clothes being on. I never want you to do anything you don’t want to.”

You rest your hand on his, soaking in the warmth of his touch. “It’s okay” you insist, immediately picking up on his skepticism. He doesn’t believe you for a second. You stare into his eyes, finding comfort in them even as they narrow in your direction. “I want you to see me, all of me, I don’t wanna be afraid anymore.”

“Afraid? Afraid of what? Did I…”

You cut him off before he can finish, refusing to let him believe for a second that there’s anything he did wrong. “No, Innie, you’re so good to me. It's just…I’m not the smallest girl. Feeling me is one thing but seeing me it’s…it’s…”

Your breath hitches at the sensation of Jeongin’s hands massaging your body. He smooths the plushness of your figure beneath his palms, stopping to squeeze your love handles, your belly, your thighs.

“Seeing you would be a gift” he whispers, his lips hovering near yours. “I’ve felt your body in the dark and I’m already addicted to how beautiful it is. If you take your clothes off or not, nothing will change. I promise.”

There’s no denying the rush that you get from being touched by him. You feel it every time, the impulse to let him tear your clothes off. The longing to feel his gaze dance over your naked body the way his hands do. Typically you fight it, your fears dulling your urges, but tonight you don’t. Instead you sweep him into a kiss laced with passion, guiding his hands to grip the fabric of your shirt. 

“Help me take it off, please” you beg, too cute to deny.

Jeongin nibbles at your bottom lip, “Only if you help me too.”

“Deal” you giggle as he steals your breath away, hungrily pulling you back into the kiss.

Your clothes are shed gently and slowly like the petals of a flower. One after the other, his and then yours. All the while Jeongin’s lips are drawn to yours like magnets. Every break he has to take is a small form of torture. You could kiss him every second of every day and it wouldn’t be enough. He needs to drown in it.

He can only bring himself to stop when he feels skin to skin contact. Your naked body’s pressed to his in the bright lighting of his room. He could see you if he wanted to, glance down and delight in the pleasure of something he’s only experienced in his imagination, but instead he focuses on your gorgeous face, his heart set on making sure this is what you really want.

“Can I look?” he asks, fingertips lightly trailing up and down your spine. 

You pause, pacing yourself for a decision you know you can’t turn back from, “It’s okay. You can look.” 

Time seems to stand still as Jeongin takes a step back and his gaze falls below your shoulders where your naked body awaits in all its vulnerability. His is the smooth, toned body that you already know it to be. You’ve caught glimpses of it here and there when he’s changed in front of you. And yours is beyond what he’d imagined during those long nights spent blindly exploring your form beneath the sheets.

At first he says nothing, does nothing. He only stares straight ahead, scanning you from head to toe. But just as the nervousness threatens to return he cracks a smile, his face lighting up, stars twinkling in his eyes.

“You’re beautiful.” He exhales the words as naturally as he breathes. 

You blush, a giggle escaping your lips, “Oh my gosh, stop it.”

“Stop it? How can I? Look at you.” 

Your self doubt wants to tell you that he’s lying—that these words you never imagined you’d hear couldn’t possibly be true—but you can’t deny the way Jeongin’s looking at you or the butterflies swarming your stomach. You try to bring your arms around yourself, a thoughtless attempt at hiding away again, but he grabs your hands, lacing his fingers between yours. 

“I mean it” he whispers, thumbs lightly grazing your skin, “Your body’s gorgeous and I feel lucky that you let me lay eyes on it. Thank you.” 

Your cheeks heat up and you dip your head down, too flustered by his words to maintain eye contact. Jeongin cups your cheek, tilting your head back up. He’s stubborn as always, refusing to let you escape his affection. 

“You think so too, don't you?” he asks, his lips floating back to yours. He almost kisses you, just almost, but lets his lips dance there, teasing you with their warmth. 

“Think what? I don’t…” you begin to speak but the feeling of his hands making contact with your belly steals away what was coming next. You let out the softest breath, bordering on a hushed moan. His touch always sets your soul on fire but this time there’s something different about it. Some new aspect of it that has your head all fuzzy and your knees going weak. 

“Think that I should feel lucky that I get to see you” he says, massaging the plush of your belly, “And grateful that I get to touch you.” 

He glides his palms down to your hips, taking indulgent handfuls of your curves as your body gives into his touch. Your fingertips run up his arm, feeling the ridges of his muscles as they flex with every breath. His body shivers, your quiet praise doing to him exactly what his does to you.

“You can’t say things like that, Innie.” 

“Why can’t I?”

“Because I might start believing it.”

Jeongin flashes you that dimpled smile, “Good. I want you to.” 

His lips collide with yours again and it feels like the whole room’s spinning because it is. He closes his arms around your waist, kissing you lovingly as he twirls you towards the bed. Before you know it your head’s resting on a pillow as your body sinks into the softness of the mattress. You can’t tell if it’s the mattress or the euphoria of Jeongin’s tongue tangled with yours but it’s like you’re floating on a cloud.

Jeongin kisses you like it’s the last time your lips will ever meet. His hands explore your body like they’re terrified to forget even the tiniest detail of what you feel like. The affection he pours into you is overwhelming yet you wouldn’t dare ask him to stop.

He saw you, everything about you, and the only place he ran to was your arms. You feel special, cherished in every way for exactly who you are. All your worries seem like nothing more than silly little things in the presence of his adoration. 

Finally breaking from the kiss, the necessity for air forcing your lips apart, Jeongin curls up beside you, keeping you in his arms as he slips a blanket over your naked bodies. You rest your head on his chest the same way you did on the couch, only now your mind isn’t wandering off somewhere far away. It’s right here with him, basking in the moment. 

“Promise not to hide from me anymore” he sighs, planting the sweetest kiss on your forehead. 

You relax into his arms, smiling as your heavy lids fall shut, “I promise.” 

You thought you’d feel more vulnerable lying beside him with your clothes in a pile on the floor but being like this with him is the safest you’ve ever felt, the most comfortable you’ve ever felt, in your own skin. Hide from him? And miss out on a feeling like this? Never again.

[tobylovesick]

Tw : A TONN OF BLOOD AND GORE !!

Geoff and owen, inseparable buddies <33

[susartwork]

Lineart completed!

WIP: Salphys but they're dancing Sugar Song to Bitter Step

[whimsyfinny]

He's a Winchester

Chapter 2

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Summary: It's been a long time since (Y/n) and Dean's paths have crossed. Last time they saw each other it was ‘98 and they were young and living in the moment. Nine years down the Line, their paths cross again, but (Y/n)s longest kept secret is about to become Deans reality.

Slow burn (ish), mom!reader

Warnings: language, mention of toxic parenting/custody battle, angst, alcohol,

Chapter Word Count: 3471

MDNI 18+

A/N: here it is! I’m not gonna lie, this is going to be very slow burn at first, but don’t worry, you know me and you know how much juicy content I write so it’s definitely coming hahaha. I’m also trying to figure out a schedule for posting this, so hopefully I can upload two chapters a week.

A/N2: GUYS IT GOES WITHOUT SAYING but PLEEEEASE provide your age if you want to be added to the taglist and it isn’t in your blog. This story is tame now but it’s gonna get spicy, and my blog is strictly 18+. So pleeeeease save be a very long job and help a gal out. 

Photos from Pinterest

Previous Chapter: Chapter 1

Chapter 2

I reached for the bottle of wine for the third time in the last hour and a half. I was sitting with Kat, pyjamas adorned, in the living room of mine and Levi's modest two bedroom house. For financial (and personal) reasons, our little house didn't follow current trends and looked more like something out of a popular 90s sitcom. The couch was comfy, the blankets were fuzzy, and a fresh pot of coffee was always brewing. Pictures embellished the walls of every milestone Levi had achieved; every birthday party, every new dirt bike, every new hairstyle. There were a few of Kat and I from over the years, going way back to when we first met back in ‘99 and both decided to rock platform heels on at the turn of the millennium - having tiny babies at the time didn't seem to stop us. Every single moment on these walls was a happy memory - something that I would treasure forever, yet there was something missing. There were no photos - or perhaps a scarce few - of my own parents, or of them with Levi, or of any extended family for that matter. The price I paid when I decided to have my son out of wedlock, at barely twenty years old, with a man who my family saw as a total stranger, is a price I'd pay every time in a heartbeat. Kat and Toby were our family now, and that was more than I could ever ask for. That was why the sheer possibility of Levi getting to meet his dad for the first time in, well, ever… it had my mind spinning. It was a scenario I'd dreamt of, late at night when I couldn't sleep and the burdens of life weighed me down. I conjured false memories in my minds eye of the pair of them fixing his bike on the drive or driving to school in the impala. I pictured us having breakfast together as a family and taking trips to the movies. Being together. Because no matter how many dates I went on, or how many frogs I’d kissed over the years, none of them were Levi's father.

None of them were Dean Winchester.

“Girl you have to reach out to him,” Kat walked in from the adjacent kitchen before slumping on the couch next to me, wine glass elevated to reduce spillage.

“Kat I could barely look at him today without feeling like I was going to have a heart attack - how the fuck am I supposed to talk to him?” I glanced at her with wide eyes, every nerve in my body on edge despite the wine and scented candles. Kat sighed. 

“You might never get this opportunity again, and we both know that if you don’t give Levi the opportunity to meet his father then you’re going to regret it for the rest of your life.” I held my breath, urging the raging storm in my mind to quiet down before letting the air gush from my lungs.

“Yeah I know. I just…I just never thought that this would actually happen, you know? I never thought that Dean would show up here. I figured Levi would eventually track him down when he was old enough to make that decision on his own. I have no idea how to even approach this.”

“Sure you do!” Kat beamed, a wicked glint in her eye, “you sit him down and say, ‘Hey Dean! Remember when we had sex in the back of that amazing car of yours nine years ago? Well, actions have consequences, and yours in eight years old and sitting in his science class right now.’”

I couldn't stop the grin from spreading across my face and I cackled when the bit of popcorn I threw landed in her wine glass.

“Bitch.”

I blew her a kiss in response to her insult. It didn’t take long though for the distraction to run its course and for my mind to return to its state of panic.

“But seriously, what am I going to say to him? What if I tell him, and he rejects us too, like my family did?”

Her smile softened.

“From everything that you’ve told me about that man, I highly doubt he’s going to reject you. Sure, he might not stick around permanently, but he sounds like the kind of guy that would stay in touch,” her softened smile turned to a stern stare, “but he’s only going to do that if he knows. He deserves to know he has a son.”

I took a long gulp of my wine. 

“Yeah, I’m going to tell him…” I paused, gnawing my bottom lip as I drew my knees to my chest, “it’s Saturday tomorrow so I’m not at work and Levi has two hours at the track. I can try to do it tomorrow, but I’m not sure if I’ll even be able to track Dean down in that time - I have no idea where he could be.”

“Hey, I’ll pick up Levi from Motocross - it’s been a few days since him and Toby have spent any proper time together anyway, just them two. Tobes’ has been dying to show him those brand new boots of his.”

We shared a smile. That’s the thing about Kat; she always had my back, no matter the situation.

“Thanks babes, I owe you one.”

She shook her head.

“No way - this is me returning the favour from when Toby’s dad decided to show an interest in his own child. I’m pretty sure my kid thought you were adopting him at one point from how much he stayed here,” I laughed, remembering the camp bed I bought especially for Toby, along with all the extra duvet sets and boxes of cereal I’d had to purchase for the best part of half a year.

“He’s a good kid, and honestly he and Levi entertained themselves for most of it.”

There was another pause in the conversation as I recounted how difficult it had been for Kat when David had shown up, insisting on being a part of Tobys life despite zero contact since his son was born. They’d argued over custody, over which school he went to, the clubs he attended. Even his hobbies were on the line, with David wanting him to play football despite Toby already being involved down at the track with the bikes. The stress caused Kat to lose weight and sleep, and she nearly lost her job over it all when she kept falling asleep at her desk. I’d lost count of how many times she’d cried in my arms. Cried over a man who thought that practically owning his son was his God given right despite being an absent father, and I think that is what scared me the most. That I would feel the same wretched things that she felt, and the waves of disappointment that crashed over her time and time again when false promises were made. It took her months to settle on an agreement due to David's behaviour, and Toby finally sees his father, albeit only for one weekend a month. It's better than nothing, but certainly not worth the fight that was fought with blood, sweat and tears. 

I hope from the bottom of my heart that Dean takes the news well, and doesn't leave us in the dust like he does in my worst nightmares.

It had taken me around thirty minutes to track down Dean. Well, to at least find the impala. It's common knowledge that if you find that car, Dean isn't far away. I’d parked my truck two spaces down, and luckily we were within walking distance of my favourite café, Jolenes’. It was my safe space. The place that I would finally tell him about Levi.

I pulled the sleeves of my soft cardigan down over my hands to stop myself from chewing nervously on my nails. Leaving the safety of my truck, I paced over to the black Chevy and stood by it, determined to speak to Dean as soon as possible. I knew that if I had stayed sitting behind my own wheel, there was a huge chance that I'd chicken out and just drive away. As I waited I checked over the car in front of me, admiring how he still kept it spotless after all these years. Unable to stop myself, I let my gaze drift over to the backseat, the events that unfurled on the soft leather racing to mind. I pulled my lip between my teeth, unable to resist the replay of memories.

“You have good taste in cars.”

I practically launched out my skin as the voice came from behind me. I could hear the amusement in his voice from a few feet away. I spun on my heel and our eyes locked, the charming grin slipping slightly from Deans’ lips when he realised it was me. The playfulness in his features quickly softened, a true, genuine smile now gracing his lips.

“Dean…” I suddenly felt breathless, but despite my nerves I returned his smile in kind.

“It's good to see you (Y/n),” he stepped forward and pulled me into his arms, enveloping me in his entirety. I closed my eyes as I hugged him back, wrapping my arms around his neck and taking a deep breath, my brain tingling at his familiar scent.

“You too, Dean. It's been too long.”

After a moment we released each other and Dean stood up straight, smiling at me again with a soft twinkle in his eye. We both flinched slightly when someone cleared their throat and he took a step back. 

“Oh, uh, (Y/n), this is Sam, my younger brother,” he patted the shoulder of the young man standing beside him, and I instantly recognised him from the dessert parlour. He was tall, taller than Dean even, which was one hell of an accomplishment, and his face held a similar boyish charm to Deans. Yet he looked softer around the edges, like he hadn't been hardened by life too much yet.

“It's a pleasure, I'm (Y/n). I've known you're brother for a while,” I smiled as I shook his hand, taking note of the rough calluses beginning to form on his palms. “He used to talk about you all the time, apparently you're the smart one of the family,” with a grin and a quick glance at Dean, I tested the waters with humour. If he laughed or took the blow like a champ, now was a good time to talk to him. Sam chuckled, squeezing my hand slightly in his before letting it go. 

“Ouch… (Y/n), sweetheart, aren't you supposed to be on my side here? Y’know, with our history and all…?” he feigned hurt with a hand on his chest before his lips twitched up and he shot me a wink.

“I mean… she's not wrong,” Sam laughed, dropping his hands lazily into his pockets.

“Hey, I'm just going on what you told me, Dean. Don't hold that against me,” I grinned at them both, unsure of what to do with my hands so I crossed them across my chest.

A small breath of silence passed between us, Deans’ gaze holding mine with an intensity that made me want to look away. I didn't. Sam cleared his throat again, clapping his hand to Deans’ shoulder before taking a step back.

“I'll, uh, give you guys a few minutes,” and with an appreciative nod from Dean, Sam gave us some space. With his younger brother gone, my heart began to flutter in my chest. The time to break the news was getting closer, and my nerves were on edge. On fire.

“So,” he started, taking a step closer with a deep breath, “how's it going? How long has it been?”

“Nine years,” I was almost too hot on the mark, my words coming out faster than I'd intended and Dean blinked slightly. I sighed, looking down. “There's been a lot going on, and honestly, I've really needed you at times. You're a hard man to find Dean Winchester.” 

“I'm sorry, sweetheart,” his brows pinched apologetically and he reached for my hand, tracing my knuckles with his thumb. I took a deep breath and met his gaze again.

“Do you… do you have some time? I need to talk to you. It's important, and if I don't do it now, I don't know if I'll get another chance.” 

He nodded slowly, giving my hand a squeeze, releasing it hesitantly with a slight wince to his features.

“Uh oh,” he said, “am I in trouble?”

I laughed, the sound light off my chest.

“Oh Dean,” I reached up to touch his face, and his instinctive reaction was to lean into my palm, “you don't know the half of it.” 

The walk to the café had been pleasant. We chatted about what we'd been up to since we last met - Dean revealing he was still in the same line of work and had travelled around a lot, never really settling down. There was something about that nugget of information that made my stomach twist in knots. He learnt I was still a receptionist, this time at the local garage  instead of the large dealership I had scored before. He asked why I'd changed, to go to something smaller, lesser, and my silence urged him to wait until we were at our destination. He knew I was anxious, and he did his best to keep conversation light and breezy until the time was right. To an untrained eye he was unphased, yet I could tell from the lip nibbling and flitting gaze that he was nervous too.

Do you think he's already guessed it?

The bell jingled as we walked in, the two baristas looking up and instantly greeting me with a wave and a smile.

“Hey (Y/n)! Your couch is free,” the first barista, a young man around my age with soft blond curls waved to me across the counter, his brilliant grin making me smile with a comforting familiarity. “Your usual?”

“Yes please! Thanks, Jake,” I returned the friendliness, stepping around the tables until we arrived at my favourite spot.

“And for your… date?” He gestured to Dean, who was now shrugging off his leather jacket, “what can I get for you pal?” 

Dean hesitated, before just holding his hands up.

“Uhhh, I don't know, I guess I'll have what she's having.”

With our hot beverages on their way, I sat down in my usual nook in the corner whilst Dean sat down opposite, in that same plush armchair that Kat had sat in yesterday. Where Kat had been swallowed by the chair and its all-consuming cushions, Dean had the opposite effect. He made the chair look small under his broad form, like it was made for a child. There were a few moments of silence, neither of us really knowing where to start. So I bit the bullet.

“Dean… before I tell you anything, just know that I've been trying to get hold of you on and off for years. Your number always seemed to go to voicemail and I never got a call back. So please just… know I tried.” 

I looked up and he was totally engaged, already hanging off every word I said as he leant forward, his elbows on his knees. Our attention pulled away from each other briefly as our coffees arrived, hand delivered by the second barista - a woman a few years older than myself with a jet black pixie cut.

“Thanks Emily, you're an angel,” I grasped the mug before she even had a chance to put it on the table and clutched it in my lap, letting the warmth seep through my palms to help soothe my nerves. 

“No worries babes, you two have fun,” she looked between Dean and me with a playful smirk, throwing me a wink before she turned around. 

Great, the gossip starts now.

I turned back to Dean who was now sitting on the edge of his seat. I took a deep breath.

Do it now.

“Dean, I have a son.”

I watched his face twitch slightly, almost like it dropped in disappointment, however it was so fleeting across his features that it was hard to tell. He pulled a strained smile onto his lips.

“(Y/n) that's great, I'm happy for you,” he looked down at his boots briefly, choosing his next words, “I guess this is you telling me to stay away, huh? Now that you have a family and all. It's ok, I get it.”

I shook my head, placing my cup on the table so I could pull myself to sit on the edge of the couch, almost mirroring Dean.

“No, no Dean, that's not- look, what I'm saying is…” another deep breath, “you, have a son.”

I watched his eyes go wide, unsure if he heard me correctly.

“What?” His voice was breathy.

I looked down into my mug for a second, choosing my words. 

“I have a little boy; he's eight, his name is Levi…and he's yours, Dean. He's your son.”

I dared to look up at him, watching his eyes go wider and his mind empty of thoughts. Either that, or his mind is racing so fast that it's left his body on standby. I gave him a few minutes to process the news. Or at least process it the best he could as it would likely be days or weeks before this fully sunk in. Nervousness prickled at my own skin, my worst fears of rejection bubbling to the surface again at his silence. I sighed.

“It’s ok, Dean, I’m not expecting you to-”

He stood abruptly, stepped over the coffee table and pulled me to my feet, wrapping his strong arms around me in a crushing grip. His arms were so tight that it almost winded me, yet I returned his embrace. The feeling of his lips on the top of my head surprised me as he kissed my hair, the sensation warm and comforting. He placed one, two more kisses before he cupped my face in his large hands, his rough palms gentle against my cheeks as I locked eyes with him. The sight was beautiful. The annoyance and exasperation that I expected to be met with was nowhere to be seen, and I saw no shadow of negativity within those evergreen eyes. All I saw was love. Pride. Joy. Excitement. The relief washing over me felt the same as climbing into your nice, warm comfy bed when on the brink of exhaustion. 

“I’m a dad?” his voice cracked slightly whilst his eyes shimmered.

I nodded as a grin erupted across his face, followed by an airy, almost unbelieving chuckle.

“Holy fuck, (Y/n)-”

“You’re not mad?” my voice was quiet.

“What?” Dean looked at me as though I’d grown a second head, “of course not. Why would I be mad?”

“Because it’s been nine years since we last saw each other, and suddenly this woman who you’ve not spoken to in nearly a decade drops the biggest truth bomb on you. A truth bomb  that I know you definitely weren’t expecting,” I try to step back but he pulls me in for another hug, squeezing the air out of me a second time.

“(Y/n), sweetheart, this is the best bit of news I’ve had in a long, long time.”

I smiled into his chest, freeing my arms to wrap them around his neck and pull him down into a hug of my own. We stood for a moment in our embrace as the coffee shop busied around us. I knew this shop and I knew this town and people would soon start to talk, start to try and figure out Dean: like who is he? How does he know (Y/n)? Why are they acting so familiar? Is he trouble? But that was all unimportant rubbish that I would deal with later. Right now, Levis father was here, and he knew. For the first time in my adult life I felt like I wasn’t keeping some devastating secret from an incredible man, and it was like I could breathe again. 

Pulling away from Deans’ bear hug, I tucked the wisps of hair away that had come loose from my claw grip and grinned up at him, reaching for his hand. I held it in mine as I swayed slightly on the spot, like an excited schoolgirl who’d just been asked on her first date. Dean smiled down at me, the sort of smile that shone on top of the world.

“So…” I started, biting my lip slightly.

“Do you want to meet your son?”

Next Chapter: Chapter 3

Taglist: @suckitands33 @jackles010378 @megara0224 @libby99hb @roseblue373 @hobby27 @calibootsgirl @lyarr24 @autistic-gothic @wattpaduser200 @spndeanwinchesterlvr @mxtansy @magssteenkamp @redmaro86 @slut-for-evans-stan @spookyysinsanity @localjisung @king-of-milf-lovers @xshortputax @jerksbitch @multifandoms-saidwhat @deans-baby-momma @writersxxx @rox2008 @jeysbae @ladykitana90 @proudbisexual @ladysparkles78 @elenasalvatore1 @bxtchboy69 @saemiau @lilithlunastark @kazsrm67 @chriszgirl92 @riah1606 @impala67rollingthroughtown

[infamous-if]

AUGUST UPDATE

I posted the August Plans on Patreon.

- Seven POV scene

- Seb POV scene

- Orion POV scene

- G POV scene

- August POV scene

- Seven and MC deleted scene (Band Member tier)

- G and Vic deleted scene (Band Member tier)

- Sneak Peak of Part II

- Monthly Q&A roundup. (Band Member tier)

Next month will be spread out much better, but I’m happy with this! I have a few more ideas for August that I may drop ^^ Probably an August story to celebrate the month of August lol Hopefully this is a worthy start for my first month, I’ll def have it a bit more organized and dropped at a more consistent schedule.

As for non-patreon stuff,

I started working on Part II again (don’t kill me pls) and I really want to get that out as soon as possible. After that, I will be carefully picking it apart line by line to fix everything, make it better, and just improve on it.

After Part II, we start getting into the nitty gritty of stuff and the amount of variables, flavor text, and everything becomes…a lot. So I want to balance my stats and have all my variables established before hand. I don’t want the gap between Part I and Part II to be too big because the gap between Part II and Chapter 3 might be on the longer side due to that. We will see.

That’s all! I’m still incredibly sick and it’s getting irritating lmao but I hope everyone is having a good day :)

[scooburst]

So here’s everything you need to know about the current situation.

My whole phone is on lockdown. I’ve been told when it finally comes back, I’ll have to delete tumblr and discord. Hopefully I can use the website and get around it. My parents are looking at blocking it on my computer as well. I don’t think they can, but thier also monitoring it so I’ll have to be very careful. I have five minutes after 7:00 AM EST to be here before it’s over. Throughout the day, I will be on for one minute twice (two one minute sessions) just to check in. From there I might be able to answer one or two asks and quickly peak at my notifications. I’ll say in the mornings a few things; what happened yesterday, updates on the situation, and if I’m okay. That will be all I’ll be able to post. Sometimes if I have it at night, I’ll come on just to say goodnight or answer a few more asks. But again, it’s only a minute. I’m trying my best to stay calm for this but it’s not going great.

What exactly happened is a bit more complicated. I’ll recount it for you all just so it’s understandable. My parents at some point looked over my computer, which was logged into tumblr and discord, and decided I was talking to complete strangers and being dangerous. Yes I was talking to people online but I was being safe, and I don’t think they’d listen to that. But that isn’t exactly stopping me from talking to those “strangers”. I don’t think my parents really even see you people as humans that are good people. But. You know. I can’t fix that. So now my phone is locked down. I can only text them and one of my friends. I can use the bare essentials. All I know is at some point it’ll be unlocked, and I’ll have to delete these sites. I’ll try to plan for that best I can. But that’s essentially what’s going on.

As for the discord if anyone’s on that. The management of it is being handled by people I trust most there. Use it however you like, and to those two: Do whatever you want with it, but keep it free and open to anyone. All I want is for you all to continue making sure the people there are okay. I will pop in every day and say I’m alive, but really not much else. And yes I will read the messages, as much as I can.

Now that that’s over, onto the newly scheduled post.

Date of writing: 11/1/24

Am I okay: not really, but I’m alive and “healthy”

Things that happened: today, I have a hockey game, and we got evacuated early from school because of bomb threats. At home I kinda just walked around. I played a little bit of guitar, I’ve been listening to music and built legos. I’m doing some puzzles as well. I’m trying to take care of myself to hopefully get my parents to let me back here.

Log: today, I was taking the chance I had to look through my notifications. And I cried. At everything you all wrote to me. I’m going to miss you all so much. You all are such amazing people. I can’t say I didn’t think you’d all say that, but it still caught me off guard. Thanks. I’m glad you all are still going, as far as I know. Keep that going. Dying isn’t good for you! I also saw someone made a whole blog of days without me. That’s insane. I don’t know what to say to that. Hopefully, it doesn’t have to count to high. I’m gonna write your urls all down so I can visit you all when I can finally be back officially. I know this is all probably really confusing with me still responding to things, but it’s just a very complicated situation right now. It sucks tp not have things like this to vent and feel better, but I have started to keep a journal so I can place my thoughts somewhere and I’m going to eventually try to open up to one of my close irl friends to hopefully have someone to talk too. I’m probably never going to just move on from this, it’ll always be something I remember and maybe something that still hurts, but it’s still some of the best memories I’ve ever had even if I cry thinking about it. I’m doing my best here to distract myself, get back into reading, maybe slowly try to build my parents trust that I can handle my phone, even though I could already. But it’s fine. Ive found a lot of entertainment in the photos app recently. Maybe when I come back I’ll share it all with you. Sorry these posts are so long. I’m just trying to stay here as much as I can. But jsut know not to worry, becahse I’m still okay, and I’m alive. Apparently I’m going to be talked to about discord and tumblr. There is some hope I can stay, but we’ll see. Either way im a sneaky boi :)

The last thing I want to say is that whoever made that blog counting how long I’m gone, you are so appreciated. I appreciate all of you really. And all of you who’ve made a post tagging me about whatever experiences you’ve had with me or put it in my askbox, you’ve made me feel so much better about this just knowing I didn’t fuck it up with you. If you didn’t make anything like that, don’t feel obligated to. Just knowing you’re alive is the best thing for me right now. Stay safe, if not for yourself, for me, and if not for me, then for someone else. I’m doing the same for all of you.

ALSO! Ima probaly make a tag list for this so you can get this as soon as possible! I know this is almost becoming a newsletter but hey that works. So if you wanna be on it, just say so (preferably in a reply or reblog to this post, with nothing but that you want in, separate from any comments about the post itself. It helps!)

[nahoney22]

Congrats on the 3k! Not shocked at all, you're wonderful and deserve it! 💜 I was wondering if you'd do a smut piece with Echo and fem reader with the NSFW prompts 'can you feel what you are doing to me?' And 'you are the biggest turn on'? But would it be possible to add the 'accidental brush' prompt to it? If not, no worries! But maybe like a mutual pining/idiots being in love with each other and not realizing it until something finally caves? I'm a sucker for that stuff lol

3000 Prompt List Celebration

Echo X F!Reader

word count: 1.6k

NSFW

prompts:

• “Can you feel what you are doing to me?”

• “You are my biggest turn on.”

• & ‘Accidental Brush’

warnings: NSFW, explicit sexual content, mutual pining, idiots in love, female reader, first kiss, flirting, handjob, fluff, aftercare.

authors note: oh @theroguesully I’m so sorry about the wait! This was completely lost in my drafts and it was scheduled to be posted literally months ago but Tumblr said no. Anyway, hope this is okay and thanks for the support! Love this idea.

“Are you busy?”

You glanced up to find Echo near, his mechanical hand cradled in his grasp. "I've got time," you replied as you set your previous task to the side, observing him settle next to you as he lays his prosthetic down gently. "What seems to be the problem?"

"It's acting up. No clue what happened. I've tried everything," he explained, a hint of frustration evident in his voice. Your lips curled into a knowing smile.

"You think I might have a solution?" You took the cybernetic hand, studying the connections and circuits. "When did it start acting up?"

"Roughly an hour ago," he admitted, his gaze intently following your movements. Most people made him feel self-conscious about his enhancements, but with you, he felt different. It was your gentleness, your genuine care. And the undeniable fact that you were the most enchanting individual he'd ever encountered - a secret he guarded closely. Though he had his suspicions that maybe Hunter knew. And Wrecker… and everyone else. Just hopefully, not you.

"Hang tight, I'll sort this out," you said, pinpointing the malfunction. "I can bring it over when I'm done."

"You trying to send me away already?" He teased.

"N-No, it's just—" You stuttered, forever caught off guard by Echo's smooth presence. From the moment you'd met, you could not deny the fact he made your heart skip a beat. He was also so tentative and kind, not to mention utterly handsome too.

“Mind if I stick around?”

The intensity of his gaze caused your hands to waver just a fraction, betraying the storm of emotions raging within you.

"Of course," you managed to reply, trying to sound more composed than you felt, then refocused on the task at hand.

As you began to work away, Echo was captivated. Watching you effortlessly navigate the intricacies of mechanics always left him in awe. In his eyes, your skill rivaled that of even the most seasoned experts like Tech. Or perhaps he was simply biased.

But as time passed, his appreciation began to shift. While you remained engrossed in fixing the issue, his eyes strayed to the gentle curve of your lips, the way you absentmindedly bit down on your bottom lip as you concentrated. It wasn't meant to be enticing, yet he found himself stirred by the sight. He swallowed hard, an uneasy tension filling the air around him. Shifting uncomfortably, he hoped you wouldn't notice the effect you had on him.

Echo's sudden fluster caught your attention, making you smirk mischievously. "Everything okay?" you teased, having caught his uneasy demeanor.

"Just... feeling a bit warm," he replied, his fingers absentmindedly adjusting his collar.

"Well, don’t worry because I’m now done." You handed over his fixed prosthetic, your heart fluttering as you awaited his verdict.

The ease with which he reattached it and the grin that spread across his face told you everything. "You really are something," he whispered, though not quietly enough to escape your ears.

You leaned closer, the playful edge in your voice unmistakable. "And what’s that?"

He met your gaze, a warmth emanating from his eyes that had your heart skipping a beat. "Brilliant," he replied, his voice firm with conviction.

Taken aback, you offer a shy smile, averting your gaze. "I should get back to my work," you murmur, gesturing to your previous task. He follows your gesture and nods in understanding.

"Do you need a hand?" Echo offers, his eyes searching yours for an answer.

"No, it's just some minor tweaks left. But hey, if your arm gives you trouble again, let me know," you reply warmly, your words making him feel an unexpected surge of warmth.

He returns the smile, more genuinely this time. "I appreciate that. Is there any way I can thank you? Anything you need?"

Caught off guard, the first thing that comes to your mind spills out, "A hug?"

His eyes widen, clearly taken aback. You've shared casual touches, sure, but a hug was stepping into new territory.

Seeing your hesitation, he responds with a soft smile, "I'd like that."

You both stand and Echo's eyes search yours for a moment, and then with a gentle determination, he opens his arms to you. The galaxy seems to slow as you step into his embrace. The surprising warmth of his body against yours feels both unfamiliar and comforting, the steady beat of his heart syncing with the rapid thumping of your own.

You rest your head against his chest, discreetly inhaling the unique scent of him - a mix of metal, oil, and something distinctly Echo.

But, something feels different.

You pull back from him slowly and that’s when you see it. Your mouth subsequently waters and a sudden heat pangs at your core.

Your heart races as Echo, completely forgetting that his previous arousal hadn’t completely faded and the hug, only sprung it back as you accidentally brushed against him.

“It’s not what it looks like.” He utters quickly, eyes wide and absolutely mortified but you’re too stunned to speak.

And you’re not at all upset. In fact, you are rather in awe. “Then… what does it look like?”

Echo's face burns, the combination of his embarrassment and the close proximity making it all the more intense. He struggles to find words, his confident demeanor faltering in the face of his unexpected vulnerability.

"It's... I mean..." he starts, trying to form a coherent thought, "Being close to you, feeling your warmth, it just... affected me. And watching you work…”

Your eyes remain locked onto his, the weight of the realisation settling in. The physical evidence of his attraction had been a surprise, but in a way, it also confirmed what you had both been dancing around for so long.

Taking a deep breath, you muster the courage to admit, "I affect you, huh?"

As you didn’t back away, in fact coming closer, Echo let out his own deep breath and sincerely hoped he was reading the look in your eyes correcting. “You’re my biggest turn on.”

With your eyes dancing in delight at his confession, you couldn’t help but lick your lower lip, enticing Echo more whose eyes flicker straight to your lips that he had been thinking of kissing for so long. “I think I’ve thought of a new way you can thank me, Echo.”

“And what’s that?” He rasps.

Closing the distance once more, you gently let your hand begin to palm the aching length in his pants, having him shudder and moan in satisfaction. “I think you know.”

Without a second thought, Echo’s lips are on yours. He kissed you like a man starved, tongue diving deep into your mouth as you manage to slip your hand into his pants, taking a grasp of his warm cock that twitches beautifully under your grasp. “Fuck, Echo,” you compliment as you feel how big and perfect he was.

“Can you feel what you are doing to me?” He breathes against your lips, earning a grin of your own as your pussy throbs in response.

“I never thought you’d feel this way about me,”

“How could I not?”

Pulling his pants down to his ankles, you take a second to break the kiss and to admire his length. Both of your hands come into contact with him and he grunts at the sensation. “You look so good stroking my cock,” he whines, leaning against the control panel as he gazes down at your hands that start a perfect synchronised rhythm, pumping against his as precum lubes up your motions.

You lock eyes with him, his hooded with lust as you pleasure him with your hands, watching his chest rise and fall with heavy breaths. “Do you like this?”

“I love it, I love it so much.” He whimpers, knees shaking as you cup his balls, gently fondling them whilst your other hand maintains its rhythm. “D-do you want me to touch you?”

You smirk but gently shake your head. “I just want to focus on you today, I want to show you what I’ve always wanted to do.”

He blinks, surprised and incredibly aroused. “You have?” He says with a soft grunt, biting his own lip as he feels his climax start to build.

“Mhm, I’ve… I’ve always wanted to do this. With you.”

“Well,” he reaches his hand up and cups your cheek before sliding his lips over yours in a quick and heated embrace, “don’t let me stop you.”

Your pace begins to quicken, and his breathing becomes more stuttered as his hips involuntarily start to roll, sliding his cock in and out of your grasp. “Not - oh fuuuck - not going to last much longer sweetheart.”

“Cum for me Echo, cum.”

He’s saying your name over and over, his head tilted back as you pump frantically at his cock until you feel a beautiful warm texture paint your hands. You gasp at the feeling, his silky white cum covering your hand.

When you pull back, you quickly grab some tissue and clean yourself up, shyly handing over some for Echo who takes it, completely flustered. “Thank you.”

“So,” he says slowly once he’s tidied himself up and pulled his pants back up, “can I ask what this means?”

“I mean,” you shift in your position, sincerely hoping you’ve read the situation between you both correctly, “I think it’s obvious that I have feelings for you.”

At this, he blows out a breath of relief. “Good. Great,” he smiles warmly, “I’ve had feelings for you for a long time too. I just didn’t think you’d feel the same.”

You approach him again, this time you both instantly fall into each other's embrace. “You’re just going to have to thank me next time in a different way.”

His eyes widened slightly, a playful smirk forming on his lips. "Is that so?"

You nodded with a mischievous glint in your eye. "Definitely."

Echo chuckled softly, his hand resting gently against the nape of your neck, pulling you closer. "I look forward to it. Just know that I have plenty of ways to show my gratitude."

☀️ Requests Open until the 15th of October. ☀️

Masterlist

Tags: @andyoufollowyourheart @littlefeatherr @kaitou2417 @eyecandyeoz @captxin-rex @jesseeka @ashotofspotchka @ladykatakuri @jambolska-grozdova a @arctrooper69 @padawancat97 @rain-on-kamino @either-madness-or-brilliance @staycalmandhugaclone @ko-neko-san @echos-girlfriend @fiveshelmet @dangraccoon @plushymiku-blog @chrissywakingup @kixs-husband @pb-jellybeans @nunanuggets @sleepycreativewriter @erellenora @zippingstars87 @tech-aficionado @grizabellasolo @therealnekomari @tech-depression-inventory @imalovernotahater @brynhildrmimi @greaser-wolf @tinyreadersmur @kaminocasey @marvel-starwars-nerd @ladytano420 @ladyzirkonia @raevulsix @whore4rex @imperialclaw801 @temple-elder @mysticalgalaxysalad @photogirl894

[libraford]

Congrats on the grant, thats amazing!

I have a little bit of advice, one of those secret things no one bothers to tell autistic people, based on the exchange with your boss you posted; when there is a mistake, in the moment, it does not matter who's fault it was. Everyone is probably unhappy, and being told it was their fault (even indirectly) will make them more unhappy. It sucks cause i want to defend myself in those moments! Its not fair!

A good response i have learned is "okay, there was a miscommunication, we should figure that out later. Right now what is the right information? How do we fix the situation for right now?" And then find a time to talk to them about where in the thread things got miscommunicated, later, when everyone is less stressed. That conversation might end up going the same way, but hopefully not since you've both had time to sit with it and there's no time urgency to solve the problem caused.

Ideally your boss would be doing this, and not immediately pinning the blame on you, but clearly she is not being a good manager! So definitely also document what you can of this to cover your ass but hopefully, this will help get out of the moment with a faster solution and your boss less on the offensive.

I usually do that with schools because that's where tge majority of communication errors happen (arrival time, schedule, location.)

But in that moment I was feeling very much like my memory of events was not reliable and ot was making me feel extra spicy since misremembering events is something that keeps happening.

[angelllcakes]

wooo!!! requests are open! how about shy crushes with chan? i could only imagine how the members would push him to make a move 😭

also, your rules post isn’t showing up for some reason! i’m not sure if it’s just me :((

hope you’re doing well!

arghhh those darn rules >:(

i have a feeling its because i altered my username, but i fixed the link and hopefully it's back up! thank you for being so considerate and acknowledging them though! i rly appreciate you bb 💗

as for this request, you couldn't have sent a better ask for me to jump back in with! but i realized i might have read the prompt wrong about half way in hehe... i hope this still meets your expectations!

just around the corner

with dino x femreader

warnings/announcements: insecure, quiet reader, mild language, ridiculously immature children in good looking, grown men’s bodies. SEUNGKWAN IS BLOND 😏😩 this is also based in a school setting, however ages or grades are not mentioned.

WORD COUNT: 1k

As someone who considers themselves not quite as "outgoing" as they'd like to be, public spaces have always haunted you by the idea of being extremely uncomfortable. It isn't the company of others that you particularly dislike, nor is it the fact that you feel the need to be alone. Sometimes, the silence that lingers in the air between small talk or with close friends is all you need to process your thoughts, and perhaps you need a bit more of that silence when the boy you find just ahead passes you by once again. He crosses through your path at exactly 7:43am each morning, sending you the most contagious smile before disappearing into his classroom. It's the same, small notion he does that makes you lose all grasp of your feelings, yet you always react so flusteredly, as if it's the first time you laid eyes on him all over again.

You wonder how he manages to find you each day, considering your schedules overlap and cycle in completely different agendas. You know for certain it's because of your class' small size, making each student familiar with one another at the very least, yet you like the idea of it being caused by fate, in the hopes that his charm is followed by a more meaningful reason rather than just out of the kindness of his heart. Chan in fact does look for you between the crowds of rushing students, desperately trying to speak with you through his bashful gazes and quick grins, but he doesn't necessarily hate the way your cheeks grown warm for him either. You give him a fraction more of the confidence he wishes for.

Yet as soon as he enters his homeroom, all hopes of his confidence disappear when he comes face to face with three of his closest friends, whom he currently wants to bury alive as they reenact the previous scene between the two of you. Their chuckles are filled with nothing but support and brotherly love for him, and as Chan's book makes contact with the blonde's face, his two followers emit an even louder laugh.

"Yah, quit messing up my look Chan!'

"Your face is already unfixable, give me a damn break."

Seungkwan scoffs lightheartedly before finding his seat as the bell echoes through the building, peeking over Chan's desk for another genuine, but mostly annoying attempt to pry at his love life.

"Are you going to actually go for her today? Or wallow in your own shyness again? If you don't do anything besides look at her the poor girls gonna file a restraining order."

Wonwoo opens an ear to the conversation from his desk, curious of Chan’s response.

In all honesty, the constant pestering by his friends encouraging him to make a move is endearing. Yet they don't understand you the way Chan does, and it makes him slightly agitated over how poorly they capture you as they play jokes with him. They haven't seen the way your shoulders lose their tension as you exit busy elevators, or how your smile which, he didn't think was capable of shining brighter than it already does, stretches a little farther after you leave loud groups or chaotic scenes.

It’s the small, more calmer things you find joy in, and you've made Chan see the brighter, more positive side of life too.

So ultimately he gathers his courage, finding you seated on a bench once the final bell signals it's students home for the day. He figured choosing to find you in peace and away from the busy crowds of your environment would calm your nerves, and save him from public humiliation if all things backfired. Opting to begin through small talk, and getting to know you little by little was his original plan, but how well will that work for him? He prepared a fail-proof scenario for a fail proof guy... And Chan, well he isn't as fail proof as he dreamed of.

If almost tripping onto your lap wasn't too close of a call to failure, almost spilling his drink over your outfit and choking on his own spit mid stutter were definitely warnings that he should apologize, backtrack his entire plan, and go scream into his bedroom pillow. However another thing about Chan is that he wasn't a quitter, and was determined to knock down this wall between you two.

That was always what you admired about him most, his desire to succeed. He helped you believe in yourself, and for all his ‘mistakes’ you’d continue to feel overwhelmed with love. You lean closer, just a few inches from his darkening crimson cheeks.

“Was their something you wanted to talk to me about Chan?”

and from the second his name rolls off your lips, his grin instantly grows wider.

angelllcakes© do not copy, modify, or repost my work without consent and permission.

[a-minke-whales-tale]

This is a pretty heavy vent post. Just be warned. My emotions have been particularly volatile lately and I am not well. Hopefully we will return to regularly scheduled whale nonsense shortly of either more engineering (I came up with some breathing notes as well as tongue notes), or more cute drawings.

Vent below the break.

Tw: vent, unreality, abuse, captivity, death

I am so exhausted and stressed. I have been honestly much of the past year, it got really bad towards summer and summer holiday did not help. I worked very hard for the humans, I did whatever I was commanded without question or resistance. I was a good animal and did what I was told to. This block it was finally going to start to get easier because I was going to reduce my time. But the humans lied to me and betrayed me and threw me away. I was not good enough for the humans still. And this past month and a half has just destroyed me so much more. I think the increased stress had already caused me to need my crutch again months ago. I am just not handling things well, but I also right now have no choice. I cannot rest, I have to solve this or I go away and if I do I likely never come back.

They took away the stability I was promised, and the relief I was promised, and replaced it with so much more stress. I have to be useful, I have to find new humans to serve. But I am exhausted in a way nothing seems to fix. I try desperately to be good but the exhaustion is just overwhelming. Before I could push myself forward, there was promise of relief of the horizon and the humans I served I thought were happy with me and valued me and I was a good animal, but then that was taken away. I have to still be good, put a smile on my face and obey the humans even though they made it clear I am not valuable to them even working my hardest and they did irreparibly fuck me with their lies.

There is no standing up for myself, there is no defending myself, and no human will help me. The humans did as they are allowed by their own rules, not that the humans would have helped me if they didn't. They are in charge and they decide what happens to me. I can only comply with them and try to make them happy. I have to try to be good, if I am not I go away.

I am not people like others. I am a useful thing. I was made to be useful to the humans and if not then I get put away. I had believed I was owned by the school, they gave me money to buy food and an enclosure and doctors, but they owned me. I do not see an option but to give the humans whatever they want, if I am not sufficiently useful to them I go away. And once they have used everything they can from me they will discard me and get a new one. But if I am not useful I will be locked away again, and I fear eventually I won't come out or they will eventually just have me put down. I often think things like me belong locked away, that I am not capable to really be good, to be useful enough for the humans. I am a broken thing which cannot follow the rules and cannot be good how hard I try. But still I have to try to be good or the humans will make things worse, if you do not comply they will force you to, and they have more power than I could ever fight.

I know the rules and I know my place. I do not have a choice. It is part of why I dream so much to return to the water and spend time to try to design some sort of whale suit. Beyond just fixing my body it would hopefully let me escape this nightmare I cannot wake up from, to escape the overwhelming power of the humans. Or even if I lived in captivity at least I would have my body back and the humans would not be able to pretend they do not have overwhelming power over me and sometimes they would be nice to me. It is honestly the only hope I have right now to cling to that things might someday be better.

Even life as a captive cetacean in a tank offers me more freedom than I can ever have like this. I keep hoping I will wake up. I had a dream/half asleep moment I thought I had died and was a calf inside my mother. The sense of relief that it was over was incredible, until sometime later I woke up and was devastated because it was not done, not yet.

Humans can be extremely unkind and uncaring to those in thier care. It is for me though an insurmountable power. A few times I have been jealous of whales like Tilikum, maybe it wasnt what he was doing when he killed those humans, it strikes me as possibly overly anthropomorphizing with insuffient proof, but he had the strength to pull them beneath the waters and enact some form of revenge. I do not want to hurt the humans though, even if I had the power to. I just want them return me to the water and stop hurting me so much. Let me exist peacefully and let me swim forever until it is time to rejoin the current and rejoin the others. Even in a tank, I would swim more free than I ever could now.

[richmondsims]

It was fall again. Time to pull out the warmer clothes and prepare the garden for winter. Ben had never been the poetic type, but he still couldn't help but muse on the symbolism of this time of year. 

The autumn of your life and all that, a time to settle in and enjoy... well, if not a decline in activity, then certainly not an increase. At 82, most people would probably put Ben in that category. Hell, he'd put himself in it at one point, years before now. But ever since, he'd never been able to 'settle down' because life kept throwing new things at him.

He'd thought his future was settled when his first wife, Marisa, had died relatively young. They'd planned out their happy retirement but it was not to be, and Ben was resolved to quiet old age spending time with his two adult sons and their children. 

Then he'd met Florence.

She was some years younger than him, but it didn't seem to matter, perhaps because she'd spent most of her lives around older people. She was an only child born to older parents, and as an adult she'd cared for them in their old age, living her whole life in the same little cottage she'd grown up in and continuing to run their flower shop, even after they were gone.

Ben was wealthy but, when they'd married, he'd left his big house in Richmond and moved into the cottage Florence loved so much. 

Much to Ben's dismay, the cottage was largely unchanged from the way it had been when Florence was a child - including all the appliances and the like. 

Florence and her parents had lived comfortably on the earnings from the shop, but there wasn't a lot left over. Her parents were very careful with their money, repairing things rather than replacing them and overall not spending a cent they didn't need to. Florence had adopted the same philosophy. Ben, a successful athlete then businessman, had become wealthy before he was 30. He didn't like waste either, but he did believe in comfort and convenience.

He'd started with a new stove, using the excuse that he loved to cook so he would be the one using it the most. He wanted something a bit closer to what he was used to.

Then a new fridge, one that couldn't be heard humming and groaning throughout the whole house. And a TV that actually got all the channels that were available.

The dishwasher was a bit harder. When it stopped working, Florence was convinced she could fix it herself. It was only after a minor but startling electric shock that she gave in.

Ben had another reason to want to upgrade as much as he could in their home - he was in good health but he wasn't going to be around forever. Although Florence would inherit the largest share of his fortune, he couldn't imagine her actually wanting to spend anything. Certainly not on her own comfort. He wanted to fit out her home in new, high quality things that would hopefully last her out.

From Ben

I'm finally back! After recreating a world and moving all its inhabitants, in-game bugs and dramas, more tweaking of the world and a bit of good old procrastination, I've finally gotten back to the post I had half-written before I started all that. Hopefully back to a regular schedule of posts now.

TS2 players might recognize Florence - she's Florence Delarosa from Bluewater Village, recreated in TS3. Ben is currently my eldest playable sim, and the last surviving 'child' of the household I created when I started playing TS2.

[pepperwebsblog]

Some reflections of mine.....

Why write the entire fic and wait to post, rather than posting chapter by Chapter?

It’s  a very good question and until Love Letters, the way I worked was to post chapter by chapter as I wrote fics. Sometimes I wrote with one chapter in hand. But I always did a serial format.

I did always plan my entire fics out chapter by chapter so I knew what I was covering and where I wanted the fic to end, so I was following a loose structure. But yeah I would write a chapter and pretty immediately post it.

I did like this way of doing things, it allows for that instant gratification which is great cos you get that instant feedback on your work.

But for Love Letters, it was a complex narrative with actual letters appearing not in chronological order. So whilst I always plan out my fics, this one needed to hang together beginning to end so I was not confident posting chapter by chapter in case I missed some detail I needed to go back and fix in chapter 1.

This meant it was about 10 weeks of work with very little feedback. And I will say having @xuxudio on hand as a brilliant friend to cheer me on was invaluable here, it was a hard slog to complete the fic with only myself having read the whole thing in entirety. But it made for a much higher quality fic in my opinion, I think the story hangs together better. This fic has had WAY more edit read-throughs than my others and so grammatically and spelling-wise it is better at the very least.

Also reflecting on things, it just works so much better for me in my stage of life now. I have reached a stage in my career where I am a senior manager and work demands a lot from me which is tiring but because I really enjoy my job it's very fulfilling.  Also balancing work with the rest of life's demands, seeing family and friends, volunteer work, exercise, and all the general adult stuff as well. I only get free time to write at the weekends and a few evenings in the week and not too late as I need to be well rested for work. So having something that I can pick up and put back down without any worries of sticking to an upload schedule or of letting readers down is helpful for me. I can work on the fic until it's done and then post regularly at a time that suits me because I have the fic written and ready to go.

And yeah, I think ultimately I prefer this way of writing now. And hopefully the audience appreciate it too as they know it's a complete fic and they're going to get something they know is finished which I think is very satisfying.

So yeah, that's why I have shifted this year to writing fics in this way. It might change again in the future but for now it's the right thing for me.

And why post chapter by chapter if the whole fic is written?

Because this gives me breathing space to write the next fic!

And it allows for the story to build, hopefully it's fun for the readers too, to keep coming back each week for the next chapter. It gives the story momentum and allows for more interaction between me and the readers.

And, being completely honest really honest, posting chapter by chapter keeps my fic at the top of the various tag lists on Ao3, as it's default ordering is by most recent. This means more people see my work and have the opportunity to read it. I'm not solely about hits and kudos but those are nice recognitions of my work.

I dont owe anyone an explanation but felt like providing one, thanks for reading!

[bisexual-horror-fan]

Tentatively Tending To Trauma. Poly!Camping Boys X FEM! AFAB! Reader. Chapter Two. "Fixing It Up."

Hello! So! I know, over a year since I posted the first chapter of this, been working chapter two on and off ever since, hopefully I can get back into a better schedule with this, but I make no promises with how my life has been lately. Regardless, I hope everyone is as excited as I am! I missed Buddy and Sam, and this fic is important to me and deserves some attention. I promise it won't be another year before chapter three, at least! Chapter one is back here if you need a refresher.

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Rating. SFW, for now. Length. 5.7K. Eventual Sam Wescott/Buddy Swanson X FEM! AFAB! Reader. She/Her Pronouns. Warnings: Movie Spoilers. Set After Stage Fright AND You Might Be The Killer. Still Very Light So Far. Mild Alcohol Consumption. Building Of Friendships.

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Your first night sleeping at camp went surprisingly well, a lot of the time you had trouble sleeping in new places, but you think the drive and overall excitement wore you out so much that you became practically comatose once your head hit the pillow. You wake up in the cabin alone, you take some time to lay in bed, enjoying the time to yourself. When the kids get here, sleeping in will be difficult if not impossible, even on some days off, so you decide to soak it up now. You make yourself get up eventually and start getting dressed. T-shirt and shorts today, you would be working outside basically all day, it was going to be hot, hair out of the way, socks on, sneakers, hat and sunscreen smeared, you head out. 

It isn’t too bad yet. It’s still early, the sun isn’t high in the sky, the fresh air is nice, there is dew on the grass, and you are ready to face today’s tasks head on. You go to the mess hall and find the serving trays full but the line itself is empty, you must be one of the first people up. You don’t wait around, you serve yourself, eat eggs and bacon and toast quickly, down coffee and juice and with a water bottle filled with ample ice you make your way back out, intent on getting serious work in. 

Wanting to get to right to it once at the boathouse and pull the key out of your shorts pocket, and you open the door, you look over everything and start to break down what you need to do and then get to work. First up is cleaning out the boathouse. It’s a little dusty, a little cobwebbed, some garbage about and while working on cleaning you notice there is a loose floorboard. You find a tool box and nails, and you really get into it. Some of the shelving is screwed up, you take to fixing that up too, and when doing that you also rearrange the boathouse to your liking. You figure you might as well since this is going to be your work station for the next three months. The floors had been swept, the window cleaned letting in some of that wonderful summer sunshine, the garbage all bagged up, you press on.

Throughout all this you assess the boats and decide they need some sooner rather than later maintenance, while working on the boathouse you found some still sealed cans of paint, after checking out the colours you made the call that after fixing them up you could even paint them. You make this the new priority, the paint was appropriate for the job, must have been bought for the last time the canoes were painted, but after they are cleaned up they will need a while to cure up properly. Even when the kids arrive you will have some time, all the kids who are going to use the canoes have to pass a swim test as well as being informed of the general safety prior to getting in one. If you are lucky, the first canoe rides will happen before the end of the first week of them being there. 

After some asking around to the other counsellors you find out there is a belt sander available, which is perfect because hand sanding this many canoes would be very time-consuming, this is going to speed up the process exponentially. The one thing that eventually pulls you out of the work is realising how hungry you are, not even sure of what time it is, but the sun is much higher, the temperature way hotter. You make the call to go to the mess hall, see if it is lunchtime. When you arrive, the place is empty. You worked through lunch and missed it, judging by the clock on the wall you’d been almost an hour past the allotted window. 

Fuck.

What are you going to do? You did bring some snacks and maybe retreating to your cabin to get something to tide you over was the move, you were thinking it over when the doors leading back to the kitchen opened and your eyes were drawn to the sound. Upon seeing Buddy up front, apron on and busing tub in his hands, you gain hope back for a second. He smiles and calls out, “Oh, there you are.” 

You begin to make your way up to the serving line where he is, “Hey Buddy. Hate to be a bother, is there any lunch left?”

He tells you in a light tone with a raise of his eyebrows, “You’re a little late.” 

“I know, I know, I got really caught up working, but still, do you have anything?” You asked, and he said, “Of course I do.”

“Wait really?” You asked, and he said, “All the food passes through my hands personally when serving, so when I didn’t see you I knew I should put something aside.” 

He gives you a single finger raise, the busing tray is set down, and he comes forward, reaches under the serving line, roots around a bit before pulling out a bag. He gestures for you to come closer, and you come up, he holds the bag out, and you take it. Opening the brown paper to find a wrapped sandwich, a fruit cup, cookies, veggie sticks, cheese and crackers, “Wow, quite a spread.”

“Hey, I know you’re working hard, gotta be well-fed.” You appreciated it, the look in his eyes conveyed that he believed it and that it meant more than just the job he was hired and brought here to do. 

“Thanks, it’s really nice of you.” He shrugs and brushes you off, saying it’s no big deal, he also tells you that he intends to stick to this, will always make sure something is put aside and even if you are late at times he encourages you to check the fridge in the back. 

You end up sitting at the table and eating the food he made, an easy conversation is struck as he is cleaning up the mess hall around you, since it was just the counsellors so far it was relatively easy, but he wants to keep in the habit of keeping it all cleaned up. 

“So, how goes the set-up?” You asked him, and he said, “Oh great, kitchen just needed a good deep clean, I’m basically all done, I just want to reorganize the fridge.” 

“I totally get what you mean, I did the same thing with the boathouse.” You tell him and he asked, “Already? You work quick.”

“Well it’s mostly done, right now I’m working on fixing up the canoes.” 

“They need much work?” He asks, and you tell him confidently, “Nothing I can’t handle.” 

“How foolish of me to doubt your immense talents.” He said easily as he loads another tray into the bin. “Very foolish indeed. I’m glad to hear the work is going well, but what about the assignment I gave you?”

A brow quirks up at that as he questions, “Assignment?” 

“Yes, to help you not be an anti-social loner this summer?” The recognition hits, and he says, “Oh, that.” 

“Yes. That. Have you made any friends yet?” He has finished picking up the trays and was going to start to walk to the back, and he says, “No, not quite yet-”

“Buddy.” You say his name and that makes him stop. A shared look, and he says your name in kind, and you push, “You promised.”

“I’m going to try, seriously, just been busy so far and also ease up we’ve been here like a day.” You take a bite of your sandwich and squint at him, an unconvinced hum, and he groans, eyes rolling back as he tells you, “I mean it, I’ll try okay?” 

You finish chewing, swallow and tell him,“That’s better. You deserve a fun summer, and I am not always gonna be able to be around to make sure that happens.” 

“You made the sale, now stop selling.” He says it lightly, and you thank him for listening to you. 

He brings the trays to the back and comes back out, he is wiping down tables as you talk, the conversation is good, there is a levity to it that makes you smile, the back and forth you’d already started to develop brings a smile to your face. You are sure he is going to make friends and have a good summer. 

Soon enough the food is done, you are giving him another thank you and getting up to head out the door, he calls out, “Once those canoes are ready, you’re still gonna take me for a ride right?”

You turn and call back, “You’ll be the first one I take out on the water, alright?”

A smile is thrown your way along with the call of, “Alright!” 

Back out in the sun and back to work you go. The time flies by while you are hard at work under the slowly sinking sun. You know another few hours have gone by when Sam comes by and tells you as such. He comes up with a friendly wave and an apology about how long he has taken to get over to you, you tell him that it’s, “-no trouble, I’ve been busy.” 

“So I can see.” he says with a look to the tools and things spread around in the grass. He has a small cooler with him, he opens it and pulls out a water bottle, he holds it out and says, “Take a break?”

You do just that. 

You and he sit on the grass, and you ask him how his day has been, “Busy, been getting pulled in every which direction, but I’m managing.”

“Almost like that’s the head counsellor’s job or something.” You tease and he laughs. He has a good laugh, you wish you could hear it more, a kind of laugh that makes you want to laugh too, infectious. You hope after camp is going, and you are all more settled into it, that he would feel more comfortable and relax some more. 

“How’d you get into doing this?” He asks, and you tell him, “My favourite activities at camp were the water based ones, swimming and of course canoeing, I loved it a ton. I got to a point of being an unofficial helper at my old camp with all that stuff.” 

“Wow, impressive.” He sounds genuine, and you toss him a sideways smile before you take another healthy drink from the water bottle he gave you, it feels so good and needed in the beating down heat of the summer day. 

The conversation meanders until you ask him, “So what about this camp, what’s the history of it?”

He opens his mouth to start to tell you when there is a shout of, “Sam?!” You both look to see another one of your fellow counsellors coming towards you both, seeking help, and Sam sighs. He gets up and tells you, “I’ll fill you in on that soon, okay?”

“You better stop running out on me soon, Sammy, or I’ll get the impression you don’t like me.” You call as you watch him go, with another laugh and a promise he’ll improve.

After some more work and a quick shower, you have dinner with the other counsellors, and you are determined today to stay up for the fire. You feel bad about being so tired and bailing, bonding with your fellow staff before camp starts up is important to you, foraging new friendships and relationships is important to you too. Dinner was good, better than yesterday even, and when you were going to return your tray and a few others upfront, you didn’t want to make Buddy have to run around cleaning them all up. You managed to catch him, offering up the trays, he smiled and took them gratefully. 

“Hey Buddy, thanks for dinner, it was fucking great.” You praise, and he said with a half-smile, “Thank you, glad you liked it.” 

“Just giving credit where it’s due. You coming to the bonfire tonight?” You ask, and he says, “I am and actually about that, it’s s’more night tonight and I could use a hand, mind helping me out?” 

You’d be happy to. 

Following along, you thought about how you hadn’t been inside the kitchen before tonight, the place looked good considering the fact it was post dinner, but again he just had to worry about feeding the counsellors, you are sure it might be a different story when all the kids are here. He was running the trays through the dishwasher and had gotten a box out while the machinery hummed behind him, he was loading it up with what was needed, graham crackers, marshmallows, chocolate and the rest as you watched him. 

“So is this what you always wanted to do?” The question filled the space, even though it didn’t need to be filled. Buddy looked up at you and said, “What?”

“Cooking. Being a cook, is this what you always wanted to do?” You asked and one of his shoulders picked up, a half shrug as he said jokingly, “I think the term you are looking for is chef-”

He gave you a look-out from under his curls and the playfulness found in his blue eyes as well as his soft looking pink lips curled into a smile had quite the effect on you. What he said next was not as humorous, but it was warm, more honest, ”-and kind of. Always wanted to open a restaurant.” 

You feel there is more he isn’t saying, but you two are very new to knowing each other, maybe he will tell you more about it another time. Instead of really pushing, you just give a simple, “Really?”

He smiles wider, you see a flash of his teeth, “I mean, everyone needs their raison d’etre, right?” You laugh, “Oh man, busting out the French, hm?”

“I’m Canadian.” He said with a fond roll of his eyes as he picked up the box, adding on, “I’m allowed. Now come on, let’s get down there.” 

You and Buddy make your way to where the bonfire is meant to be that night. Starting the fire was easy enough, and soon other people were joining. You and he make s’mores together, toast marshmallows, break apart chocolate squares and assemble the confections together, pile up a plate with the sticky sweet delights you crafted, partially wrapped in tinfoil, both have a drink each during the process. After that, you are walking around with your bounty to share with everyone. Before you know it, you are with Sam again, he is standing alone and looking stressed, you ask him, “You want a s’more?”

He looks over at you and gives you a nervous smile, mumbling, “Thanks.” He takes the s’more but doesn’t take a bite. You quirk a brow at that and ask, “You wanna share with the class or?”

Sam’s eyes move towards you, and he exhales a simple, “What?”

“I can tell something if bugging you, so open your mouth to tell me all about it or to shove that damn s’more into it.” You tell him with a smile before taking a sip from the cool can you have in one hand, the other occupied holding the plate of s’mores.

You see the ghost of a smile pass his lips, head tipping forward a little, before he starts to tell you, “I’m just worried about getting everything ready in time for the camp’s opening. Worried about making this a good summer for the counsellors and kids alike too, honestly.” 

You can’t help the laugh that spills out, you have to grip the plate harder for fear it might slip from your grasp. You laugh so hard it takes a moment for your shoulders to stop shaking, and you inhale hard as you catch your breath, Sam asks for the second time tonight, “What?”

“Sorry, sorry! I just-” You giggle before saying, “Sam, that’s fucking ridiculous.”

“Oh gee thanks.” he scoffed, and you jump to say, “No, no, I just mean, I’ve been seeing how hard everyone has been working, the camp will for sure be ready and as for having fun? I mean, come on, I saw the draft of the activities, everyone is going to have a killer time!” 

You set the can down on the picnic table you had both been standing next to, you reach out and set your hand on his shoulder, you give a reassuring squeeze and a smile that radiated as much warmth as the camp fire burning a few feet away. The smile seemed to infect him as well, you could feel his shoulder relax under your touch. He asked, “You mean that?”

And you confirmed sincerely, “Course I do! Now loosen up, eat your s’more, have a beer, kids won’t be here for a good long while, get your relaxing in now! It’s not like we can keep working on what needs to get done in the dark anyway, right?” 

He exhaled, amused and nodded, “You are very right, and uhm, thank you. I really feel better getting that out, I think I needed to hear that.” 

“Anytime, and I mean that, now I am not leaving your side until you get a drink in, you wouldn’t let me drink alone, would you?” A slight pout and he says, “Well, I am supposed to be setting an example to the other counsellors-” He reaches into the nearby cooler and takes out a beer. 

You and he drink together, people come by for s’mores and the night wares on. You have a good time, and eventually you and Sam drift apart, and you talk to your other counsellors, and Sam does the same. At one point you look over at him and see him talking animatedly and excitedly, at least three drinks deep, face a little flushed and laughing to some joke, it makes you happy to see. 

You go to bed that night much later and wake up the next day much later as a result. You get ready and make your way to the mess hall for a late breakfast, when you are in line getting served Buddy teases you, “Sleep alright?” 

A small laugh, “M’ fine, I hydrated before bed, no hangover for me.” 

“Smart cookie.” He praises as he heaps scrambled eggs next to your silver dollar pancakes, and you grin, “That’s me.” 

The breakfast is great, you eat the food, get some orange juice and coffee in you and fill up your reusable water bottle with ice and water before heading out to get back to work. 

Falling back into the rhythm of it is easy, you work hard, work so hard in fact you work right through lunch, again, you shouldn’t make that a habit, but you are finally caught up on everything. You are starving but happy, you make your way to find the head counsellor before going to get some food, too excited and desperate to tell him you are all caught up, you find him after a while, calling out , “Sammy!”

You approach him with a wave, and he looks up from his task, chopping wood, a smile of his own, he waves in return as you walk up to him. “Hey! Missed you at lunch, was going to swing by soon to check on you.” 

“Sorry, was busy working, but I had to come tell you, I finished my tasks, so if you need my hands anywhere else I can pick up some slack.” 

Sam’s brows lift, and he seems genuinely surprised, he sets the axe down, leaning on it, your eyes linger just a bit, he is missing the flannel, and you can’t help but notice how nice his arms look in his camp branded t-shirt. “Wow! You work quick!”

“Thanks!” You say with a big smile, feeling genuinely happy to hear the praise, Sam tells you, “I appreciate the hustle, seriously, but you worked so hard, you can totally take the rest of the day off. If you want you can help with some of the final clean up in the last few areas tomorrow.” 

“Awesome! Totally would be happy to help out, I’ll see you at dinner.” You say, and he stops you, “Just one second. I have a question.” 

“Shoot.” You prompt him, and he says, “How did you get the rest of your work done so quick?”

“C’mon, man, I worked through lunch.” You say with a smile before tacking on, “And I’m just that good.” 

“Well, you didn’t eat then?” You shake your head and Sam tuts, he leans the axe against the pile of good as he tells you,  “That’s no good, dinner is hours off yet, follow me.” 

That is the first time you find yourself in Sam Wescott’s office. It’s nice, homey, the windows let in a lot of natural light, his desk is organized. There is a shelf with pictures from summer's previous, you recognize locations from around the camp, Sam was a cute kid. He offers up half of his own sandwich from lunch and a small bag of chips. You grin and take them gratefully, “Oh, thank you so much!” 

“Least I can do, you can’t go hungry.” He said easily enough with a nod. “Now go enjoy the rest of your day.” 

You turn on your heel with another thank you, and you hear him say after you, “Thank God you joined up this summer.”

The feeling was mutual. You ponder how well fed you were between Buddy and Sam as you munched on turkey on wheat on the way back to your cabin. You caught a power nap and a chapter of your book before dinner. 

After another great meal, where you made sure to thank Buddy profusely for the dinner he teased you, “Seriously, I missed you at lunch again, you gotta stop working so hard, you’ll burn out, and we aren’t even a week in!” You told him you appreciated his concern, but that you’d be fine.  After dinner, you had nothing going on, tonight there was no set activity, seemed everyone had been working themselves very hard, it was a free night, do whatever. You go to your cabin again, gather your things, and go have your first proper shower since arriving. You really scrub yourself down, much more involved than the quick rinse the other day, the rest of the night is spent relaxing and reading one of the many books you brought along. 

You pass out and wake up mid-morning to the sound of knocking on your cabin door. Stumbling out of bed, you make your way to the door and pull it open to find Sam standing outside. “Hey! Oh, my God, I am so sorry, did I wake you up?”

A glance down at yourself still in your tank top and sleep short shorts, you shrug, “Yeah, but no worries, what’s up?”

He nodded and said, “I was just wondering if you could show me around the boat house after breakfast? And then I can show you where else we might need your help?” 

“Oh yeah, sounds great!” You tell him with a nod, you try to smile but end up yawning, you cover your mouth slightly embarrassed, and Sam says, “Great, see you post breakfast.” 

You wave, “See you then.” You close the door and since you are awake you set to getting dressed and ready. You head out over Buddy serving you French toast and bacon, he greets you with a surprising amount of cheer for it being so early, you suppose you are making an impression. 

“What are you doing today?” He inquires, and you ask, “Why do you wanna know?”

“I’m done with my work, wondering if I could get that canoe ride?” He asks, and you tell him, “Sam has to check over my work and I said I would help out some other people, but I can totally make a bit of time for that today.”

“Yeah?” He asked, and you told him, “Absolutely! I’m excited about it, dying to get out on the water already, it’s been too long.” 

“Amazing, maybe after lunch?” He asked, and you said genuinely, “I’ll do my best.” 

Post breakfast you grab Sam and steer him in the direction of the boat house, you show him everything, walk around pointing out all you did and Sam is very impressed, “You REPAINTED the boats?!”

His mouth was hanging open, he reminds you a bit of a fish, and you laugh, “Well most of them, this one was in surprisingly good shape!” You say, patting the side of it. “They look like new, right? I even redid the camp Clear Vista on the sides.” 

“I am speechless.” He had his hands on his hips, shaking his head in disbelief, and you felt very, very proud of yourself, “Where else do you need me?” 

“Oh yes! About that-” He clapped his hands together and said, “-I asked around and turns out everyone is all caught up, so everyone gets a free day!” 

That IS very good fucking news. You have the whole day to do whatever you want! You ask Sam, “What are you going to do?”

“I am going to finish up some last minute paperwork, look over everyone else's work-” The way he shares his admission is slightly shy, he rushes to tell you next, “-but I will be able to join for the fire tonight!”

Stifling a laugh, telling him, “Sam, you work too hard, you better have some real fun tonight.” You sigh after, and he promises, “I will.” 

Satisfied, you wish him well on the remainder of his work, and you make your way back to the mess hall. You head right back to the kitchen, and you push open the door calling out, “Oh Buddy?”

The fridge closes, and you see his curly haired head pop into view, “Surprised to see you here already.” 

“I’ve got good news! Sam told me everyone is all caught up, everyone has a free day, so I am ready whenever you are.” You tell him, and he says, “That is very good news! I’ve got some of my own too, today is grab and go for lunch.” 

He gestures to the trays on the table, “I am gonna put em out there and people can get whatever they want, I did it, so everyone could grab whatever to finish their work, but now I guess they can grab it and go wherever they want.” 

This is wonderful all around. You help Buddy put everything out for anyone to grab before he tells you, “Let me just finish the cleanup, I’ll meet you at the boathouse in a half hour?”

You nod and go off to get some things ready. You love even this, getting everything together to go out on the water, the  half hour passes easily and Buddy joins you, he lets you take the lead, and you help him get in the boat, and you are pushing off. Buddy’s curls are hidden from view, wearing a bucket hat, he is wearing some of the sunscreen you brought, he had packed some of the lunch stuff for you guys to enjoy. The conversation flows like the water the boat is in, you talk easily but also share comfortable and companionable silences. You talk a bit about technique, how to maintain balance, steering, and Buddy listens to every word. 

He breaks one of the bouts of silences by saying, “You really know your shit.” 

A light laugh, the running water and rustling of the trees clear in the backdrop, “I’d hope so after all this time. Can’t tell you how many hours I have spent under the sun and in a boat.” 

While you guys are paused, simply floating, eating lunch, he says, “I think I get it.”

You hum questioningly and Buddy says, “Why you like it. S’ real calming.” 

Brightening considerably, you tell him, “Yeah it is! Very calming, I love how still and quiet everything can be out here. Gives me a chance to reflect.”

“Could use some of that from time to time?” He asked, and you nodded, taking another bite of your sandwich, “Yup, you?”

He sighed before parroting you, “Yup.” 

“Canada that stressful?” You ask, and he laughs, a small startled sound, “No, no, the country is not.”

“How would I know? I’ve never been. Could be a lawless wasteland for all I know.”

“It isn’t that different from America, you know.” He teases, and you say, “Then why’d you leave?”

He shakes his head, “Oh you know, just…Wanted a change of scenery. I’m young, why not get outta the country, see some of the world?” 

Fair enough. Can’t fault him for that. 

The rest of lunch is nice, you get him back to the shore, and you say, “We should do this again sometime.” 

“I would love that, make it a regular thing.” He took off his life jacket and passed it over and told you, “I have to go get a start on dinner, thanks again for the ride.” 

“Anytime.” You wave, and he returns it, you watch him go before cleaning up, getting the canoe out of the water and back in place. Back at your cabin, you do some more reading for a while until you feel a little restless.

You want to enjoy the nice weather, take advantage of it, back outside you go and during your walk you come across Sam, finally done with his work. He seems more at peace just from the relaxed expression on his face. You end up sitting on this hill together, you can see most of the camp, the sun is starting to set, dinner will be soon.

Sam says, “This is my favorite place at camp.”

You glance over at him, the orange light playing off his features, the shadows that fall and your eyes follow his lips as they move, “It’s nice up here, the view is great, just the air feels better out here you know? Fills up my lungs in a way that they don’t get filled up anywhere else.” 

You let him talk, and he continues, “I am so excited, this place means the world to me, and I am dying to make this even better than it used to be when I was a kid, you know?”

Meeting your eyes, he says, “Thank you for all your help, not to be a total sap, but I’m really grateful.” 

It has only been three days, but you already feel closer to Sam, you have a really good feeling about your blossoming friendship. 

“I don’t think you are a sap, I can tell this is really important to you. I’m happy to help make it happen.” You said, you stretch before leaning back on your hands, the grass feels cool, you look up at the colourful sky and say, “I want the same things you do, you know. I want to make this the kind of summer I remember having as a kid, and hey, maybe it is a little selfish, but I kinda wanna try and recapture some of that for myself.” 

He was a little vulnerable with you, no shame in being a tad vulnerable back. 

“I hope you can.” Sam sounded so sincere, it was utterly endearing. 

Dinner was a bigger deal tonight, Buddy and Jason poured a ton of effort into it, and there were many thanks all around. You talked excitedly with your fellow counsellors about the busy day ahead tomorrow with the first batch of kids arriving. After dessert, a make your own sundae bar, you had seconds, everyone headed back out to the fire pit. 

Alex, one of the other counsellors was going to be song leader, he came out with his guitar, he plays songs and everyone sings along, Buddy is less than impressed, you offer to sit with him and do so at the fringes of the group. You and he are having a drink and that is when Sam comes over. 

“Not singing?” Sam asks, and you laugh, a gesture of your head to your brunette and not so musically inclined haired companion, “Buddy isn’t a fan of singing and I didn’t want him to sit alone.” 

Sam seemed surprised to hear of this and said, “Nice of you to not leave him lonely.” 

Buddy hums and takes a drink, a nod before saying, “Yeah she’s been great at checking in on me, we went out on the water earlier.” 

“She took you out in a canoe?” Sam asked slowly, and you said confidently, happiness apparent, “First go of the season! It was so fun, Buddy had never been in a canoe before, can you believe it?” 

“I cannot.” Sam laughs, “I do believe about her checking in on you, she’s been doing the same with me.” 

“Oh, thanks by the way for showing me that spot on the hill, totally gorgeous, you might bump into me there on my own sometimes.” You say with a cock of your head and a raise of your brows, and Buddy not wanting to be left out, asks, “Spot on the hill?”

“Yeah, there’s this nice place that you can see almost all the camp from, Sam and I sat up there, had a good talk at sunset before dinner.” 

“A conversation at sunset.” Buddy mused, can at his lips, “You’re real busy, aren’t you?” He asks with a nudge of your shoulder, and you put your hands up, “Guilty.” 

You see it then, a look on Sam’s face at the easy physical contact between you and Buddy, there was something to it, you look over at Buddy and see them both looking at one another, almost considering each other. You look between the pair and the realization starts to sink in, you are starting to like them both and if the way they are looking at each other and reacting to hearing how you have been spending time one on one, they might be beginning to like you too. 

Maybe this summer is going to lead to more. But how could you ever pick between them?

[theproblemwithstardust]

20 Questions For Fic Writers

Tagged by @just-here-with-my-thoughts!! Thank you!!

1. How many works do you have on Ao3?

13 (meshurkaan) and 88 (the_problem_with_stardust)

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?

111,654 under meshurkaan! I have no idea about the_problem_with_stardust since some of those fics were cowritten :D

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Right now Star Wars, but I’ve also written for star trek, the witcher, teen wolf, marvel… maybe some others?

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Under meshurkaan:

sand in the hourglass codywan, 2224 words shovel in the dirt crosshunt, 1366 words any way to baffle death (Part 3: ESU), foxfives, 27786 words close out the sun (Part 5: ESU), foxfives, 12114 words (WIP) a flint and a fire (Part 1: ESU), rexfox, 31627 words

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to! I love responding to people's thoughts and reactions XD

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hehehehehe a flint and a fire :) It’s part of a series though, so it’ll get fixed soon!

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably one bright morning? I wrote it the night before TBB series finale and I just wanted them all to be HAPPY

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Nope!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Ah yes the mortifying ordeal of having your buddies read the porn you wrote. Um I think most of the time it’s fun and a little silly?

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I don’t think I’ve written any crossovers?

11. (I kept your question XD) Which fic are you proud of but wish had gotten a bigger response from your readers?

Maybe only a call? It has some of my favorite moments in the ESU but it is also mainly worldbuilding so it might have only been fun for me XD

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

A few! Mostly teen wolf stuff from WAY back in the day

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I did some round-robin type fics, but I am not a good writing partner since I struggle a lot with schedules and deadlines

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

I’m a chronic multishipper so it’s honestly the ship I am writing for at the moment (this morning it was RexFoxFives, this afternoon it is TechPhee)

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I always plan to finish WIPs, no matter how old they are (stares at across the stars) but there is a codywan fic I started for the 2021 codywan big bang and didn’t finish. I still think about it ALL the time

16. What are your writing strengths?

Hmmm one thing that I've worked on a lot is structuring plot. In long fics I like to include off-hand details that then become relevant later. And I do put a lot of thought into characterization so hopefully that comes through in my writing >.<

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Endings! I sat on trying to find my way home for three weeks before I added like twenty words to the end and just posted it

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

It depends. I used to do it a lot but now that I primarily use screenreaders to edit, I don’t love it.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

First published on Ao3? Star Wars (FinnPoe my beloved) But I was definitely writing little epilogues to each of the Chronicles of Narnia books at the age of 8

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Ummm maybe take the old, make it new? Or intersecting foliations? All of endless space unfurled? It’s hard to pick ^^’

No pressure tags: @whiskygoldwings, @cacodaemonia, @wolveria,

@catbuir, @loverboy-havocboy, @kartaylirnaak, and anyone else who would like to play?

[blindrapture]

Rapture: Before we begin.

We are about to start a long and involved process: I am about to start (tomorrow) posting OH GOD THE RAPTURE IS BURNING's final draft. As this story was first written here on this very tumblr, I have some experience with how to do this and what can go wrong.

Every day, with one single exception (May 22nd), I will post a chapter of the story (on both this tumblr and my Website). Each chapter is called a "log" (this story is also known as The Rapture Logs) and is titled with the day that it takes place. As the narrative persists from May 21st, 2011, to October 21st (and then a bit extra), I have elected to post the story now in the same way. The May 21st log will be posted on May 21st, the June 19th log will be posted on June 19th, et cetera.

As I much prefer to keep my hands on the 'product' even during delivery (there are many opportunities for something to go wrong), I do not plan on Scheduling any of these posts and will post them directly, myself, each day. I do not expect to adhere to a reliable schedule, so the exact time that a log is released may change per day. However, I may get into a rhythm. Can't promise anything. (If you want to.. what is it, Subscribe to my tumblr, make it so you get Notifications when I post? That may be a good idea. Up to you.)

After having done some testing, the exact method I use to bring these logs to tumblr this time causes some finicky formatting errors that tumblr does not allow me to fix. I've tried, many times, and they keep resetting. However, these errors are (so far) minor. When there is a long consecutive string of bolded or italicized text, for instance, you may see the bold/italics end before it should. If you see that kind of thing, I am 99% sure it is unintentional, and I am aware of it, and I am sorry. Hopefully it shouldn't be that distracting.

There are some... other missing features that the Website will have and the tumblr will not. So. The Website is the best way to read. And the tumblr will be here as a supplement, in case for some people it is just easier to stay on tumblr.

I am including links, at the bottom of each log, to the tumblr Table of Contents, and to the Next and Previous Logs. If you are following this release daily, the "Next" button will not function at first. Because the next log will not have been posted yet. Makes sense, but wanted to be clear.

Art will be included within the logs. Not every log. Not even many logs. But there will be art. And on those days, I will also post the art in a separate post after the log, giving full credit to the artist. There may be one exception I can think of, where the art is of a fundamental spoiler, and I'll.... figure something out for that event.

These logs are going to get long. They are not predictable. I mean, anything is predictable, and Rapture is easily long enough that you will start to engage with trying to predict it. But my point here is: Each day, ask your innermost heart, "Do I feel like reading this?" It is okay if the answer is "Not today." I do not require a certain number of Likes, Comments, and/or Subscribes before I post the remainder of the story. And this is not a Limited Release; Rapture will be available forever. I would like readers, of all stripes and sorts, including daily ones. But I also would like some spaghetti bolognese. Today might not be a spaghetti bolognese day, and I've made peace with that uncertainty. .....so, yeah, feel free to catch up with the story later if you must.

Now, let me remind you of the Trigger Warning that I had posted at the beginning of May.

Trigger Warnings: Sex, Gods, and Rock & Roll. (violence, to others and to the self. some swear words. teenage angst, cringe. death. insects. surrealism. symbolism. unpredictability of what will be explained and what won’t. sexual acts with dubious consent– you will be able to skip that part. religious iconography. and so much prog rock.)

The only joke in there is the word "some" before "swear words." I promise you, this story is not for everyone. I do not say that to brag; I say that to convey some of the responses I have gotten from previous drafts. I have accounted for one skip in the entire story, and it's pretty early on. Rapture hits the dubious consent theme in its least comfortable form early and then lays off of it. Being honest with you, earlier drafts did have more of it, and I cut out almost all of it, but I did not remove that early instance, even after eight big opportunities to do so. I deeply believe it is doing something beyond just shock. And so, if you choose to skip it, I have at least included a safe recap at the point where skippers resume.

That should be all the essential stuff. Now for some quick bits:

This story makes use of emoticons, including a couple that are not common. Keep in mind that every emoticon has eyes and a mouth. For instance: the .w. face is related to the owo face, but using the eyes from the ._. face. What .w. means is a sort of humble happiness, an "Aw, shucks!" (The < in <:D is intended as eyebrows, not a party hat.)

This story uses some real names, of people and places. The places are just... places. The people names are only used where permission was granted, and I explicitly only use them for the sake of aesthetic, personally enjoying the way a name looks or sounds. All the events and opinions portrayed are fictitious.

There is a caveat in the case of the main protagonist and narrator. He is a riddle of a self-insert, a caricatured snapshot in time of the author at 16. Think what you will about the merits of a self-insert. I promise you, every expectation you have has been taken care of. I promise you, I know what I am doing here.

Okay. That's a lot of words.

Honestly there's probably even more stuff I should say? But I don't want to overexplain this. Chances are, you're actually gonna be totally fine??? Chances are, Rapture in its final draft is totally readable, and not even all that shocking, and all this preparation is making it sound like it's gonna be way worse than it really is. That's the best-case scenario here. I'd rather be prepared.

So. So look. We are on tumblr. You have the ability to send me Asks. Ask me anything. Please, ask me anything. You want the best way to read? You want clarity on what the heck I was thinking when I wrote a weird opinion of Jordan's? You want to know when the story will get good? Ask me.

'Cause, starting tomorrow until the story's done, I'm only going to be posting about Rapture. I'm going full Rapture Mode. I will only reblog posts relevant to Rapture. I will only post links to the Website, or anything relevant to the story.

Right now, as of May 20th, I am still in the process of rewriting later sections of the story. I have hit some slowdown as there were some logs that took multiple days, but I am still over two months ahead of where you'll be, so there's a bit of buffer. I should be done around August? So you're watching me do a public performance here too. Trying to outrun my own story and finish it before the present catches up with me. We'll see. God, we'll see.

God, I hope my new readers are ready. Rapture was once called a "butchery of epistolary literature," are you ready to see what spawned that insult?

Am I ready to expose myself to the world once again?

Let's!!! Let's do this thing!!!

[theminecraftbee]

ayo second if you see this spread the message please: all tumblr tags with content in them are currently down, including all organization tags for blogs. anyone in a fandom that relies on liveblogs rn need a temp main tag (maintag[number] works) as long as it didn't have anything in it before the break. ANY CREATIVE CONTENT POSTED RN WONT BE ORGANIZED INTO BLOG TAGS. you'll have to schedule a reblog with the org tags for a day or two from now, when tags should be up again. (the break seems to have happened around 4:30pm EST today. last time tags broke like this it took 7+ hours to fix. it's happened maybe five-six times total now)

ah, i don't know if this is confirmed? my tags seem to be working fine at the moment, but the last hermitcraft post in the main tag was like, an hour ago, so... mileage may vary on this, tag might currently be a little borked? reblogging it again won't make it turn up in the main tags, though, so if you're worried about people not seeing it in the tag, a better solution may just be to wait to post things until later and follow existing liveblogs on your dash? idk, i don't know enough about how tags work to really... understand this... but hopefully it's useful information for other people, presuming it's a universal problem and not just a you problem?