#so like. there shouldnt be anything holding me back but they just dont want me to and thats the core of it
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bridgyrose · 1 day ago
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Ozma was trans, Salem somehow didn't pick up on this for centuries.
Ozma ran his hands over the wrappings on his chest and slipped a couple fingers in between the cloth to make sure they werent too tight. Once he was satisfied, he finished getting dressed in his tunic and armor to ready himself for the day. Just as he finished, there was a knock on his door. 
“Are you finished?” Salem asked. 
“Just about!” Ozma answered as he checked over his armor once more to make sure everything was set. He smiled at his reflection and went to answer the door. “There, ready.” 
“I dont see why you have to spend so much time getting ready when we’re just going to the market.” 
“I’m a warrior of the king,” Ozma answered as he walked out of his room and grabbed his staff. “I have to look my best at all times.” 
“Why not just wear simpler clothes?” Salem asked as she took his hand. “It’d be quicker to just wear the tunic.” 
Ozma shrugged and continued to walk with Salem out of their cottage and towards the village they lived near. “I like the armor. It makes me feel like… me.” 
“I’m not sure I understand.” 
“Its okay you dont.” 
Salem smiled a bit. “Then lets find a few tunics that’ll make you feel like you.” 
Ozma paused for a moment and pulled out his coin pouch, quietly counting the coins as he moved his fingers through them. “I have some medicine that I need to get first. My chest has been aching again.” 
“In that case, I’ll let you get what you need and then you have to meet up with me to get a new tunic.” Salem gently hugged his arm. “And maybe I can help you change too. We’ve been together long enough, its about time that I do get to see you like you’ve seen me.” 
“And you will, I promise.” Ozma kissed Salem’s cheek and smiled at her. “Just a little longer.” 
—---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Salem sighed as she came across the small cottage that she and Ozma had lived in centuries ago. The frames had nearly rotted away, the magic used to keep it sturdy finally starting to fade. Still, she wandered through the cottage, her heart aching at the memories that flooded back. She remembered the way he’d hold her when she was pained or tired, the meals they shared, the life that was almost there’s before Ozma was taken so young.
She made her way into Ozma’s study and looked around for anything that she could take to keep Ozma close to her. As she opened the door, she paused when she saw a journal sitting on a desk, one that she’d never seen before. She picked it up and started to flip through the page until she stopped at one of the last entries. 
I can finally afford the last treatment I need for my transition. After today, no more bindings and I can finally be with Salem the way she wants me to. Though part of me still worries about if she were to find out. Will this change anything between us or will she still see me as the same Ozma she’s known? I still have a long life ahead of me, so I can tell her when I’m ready. Until then, I just want to be the man I know I am.*
Salem stared at the page, almost in shock with what she’d read. She flipped through earlier entries, her fingers shaking as she stopped to read a few. 
For years I have felt more like a man than I ever did as a woman. Today, I finally cut my hair and dressed like a man. I also found rumors of magic that can help be the man I wish to be. So I’ll be leaving home soon.
*Its been a few years since my last entry and I’m no closer to finding this magic that I need. But I did get a message from a woman who was locked away in a tower. It may not be what I”m looking for, but I have to do something to help. Even if it means that I might be killed.* 
Ever since I’ve saved Salem, I’ve started to fall for her a little more every day. But now I’m worried about her finding out what I’m hiding from her. She saw my chest wrappings and I lied about what they were for. But, it shouldnt be much longer now. I finally found someone who can help transition. A potion maker in town. There’s a few ingredients I’m going to need to find for him, but in the next year, I’ll finally be a man I… that Salem sees me as. I want nothing more than for her to have a happy life with me.
Salem turned another page, her fingers trembling as the page started to crumble away. She had never known that side of Ozma, just the man she’d met and fell in love with. And now, the last connection she had of him was starting to fall apart in her hands. She finally closed the book and tucked it away in a satchel and made her way out of the cottage. If there was a magic that could make Ozma into who he was, then she was sure there was still a magic out there that could bring him back. 
She’d do anything to have the man she knew back. Even if he held a secret from her. 
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whsprings · 7 months ago
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I either gotta set some boundaries (unlikely) or gtfo of here. I don't want to hear about how you're exercising or how scary eating out is or see fresh sh or
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senxitive · 2 years ago
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Fucking frustrating.
#i cant even verbalize my feelings rn#im upset for Them asking for help KNOWING our situation (basically an ex)#and its not rly that they asked for help#its that they asked for help in a way that i nor anyone could help#theyre having an ocular migraine and seeing spots#they wanted me to look in their eyes#but like there was nothing i was going to be able to see or achieve from doing so#on TOP of our Situation#tried to offer medicine and they basically just walked away mid convo#like because THEY remembered the reality of our situation and probably because i was agitated for the same reason#and i even tried to walk out after them to try and get them to take the medicine i had instead of DRIVING with an ocular migraine which#is scary and dangerous and they still pulled away#then come back finally and say sorry its not your problem and i shouldnt have asked for help#which bothered me more than anything probably#i dont want it to be that way#i WANT to help#but i also hold so much resentment towards them and i get esp annoyed when they ask for my help with THINGS THAT DO NOT NEED HELP#but i also know that its not a good idea for me to exhibit any care or interact because it is likely me who will be overcome w feelings#AGAIN#we dont get that privilege#and it makes me angry#and i was actually having a good day and feeling normal-ish towards them in the first time since everything happened#haha#go figure#think im also upset because i proved to them why we would have never worked#but it doesnt fucking matter anyways and i cant let myself get fixated on it or ill fall back into a neverending hole#and that neither of us trust each other anymore#that fucking hurts and sucks and pisses me off#i almost asked him to feel my forehead for my temperature yesterday cause i felt like a trash cab#can* but decided it was out of our privilege...funny how that works
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spyder-junkie · 2 years ago
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EARTH-42 MILES MORALES X READER PART 2
part three ??
part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4
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Honestly the death of his father traumatized Miles.
It taught him to hold on to the things he loves, things that make him happy, because nothing is forever.
And honestly he was looking for something to fill his father’s void, something to satisfy the itch being prowler couldn’t scratch.
So not even two days later, Miles shows up at you window.
He wanted to scope you out, see if you were something he’s like to spend his time on.
With any person hes ever thought of pursuing, the thought of having to tell them hes Prowler loomed over his shoulder.
But you already knew.
Hes dressed normally this time, and hes come at a reasonable hour.
You smile when you see him, opening the window immediately for him to crawl in.
“I aint’ catch you name.” is the first thing he says, dusting off his jeans.
“Y/n.” You reply, sitting down at your desk.
“What can I help you with, Miles?”
He pauses for a moment, almost forgetting what excuse he came up with.
“Check my wounds for me? You wrapped ‘em so well ian wanna unwrap em.” He says, face calm.
You look at him for a moment before shrugging.
“bien, siéntate.” You mumble, going to grab your first aid kit.
“You speak spanish?” Miles asks, sitting down on your bed and pulling his shirt from his body.
The big gash on his side is covered in bandages, blood stained.
“A little, I take a class at school.” You smile, bending down infront of him. He spreads his knees, letting you settle onto the ground infront of him.
He shuts his eyes tight as you unwrap the bandage.
“Thats a pretty chain.” You mumbled, using a cottonball to dab at the wound.
Miles’ hands come to to touch the chain hes wearing. It was one of the many things he half-hazardly bought with his work money.
“Where’d you get it? Ive been looking for something similar.” You ask.
“I honestly can’t remember.” He mumbles, from his tone you could only assume he was telling the truth.
“Thats okay, anyway Youre all good.” You say just finishing his bandages, standing up and putting your things away.
“Oh.” Miles mumbles, not realizing how little time that would take you.
“Anything else I can help you with, Prowler?” He shivers at the way the name rolls off your tongue.
“Guess not.” He says, standing up and walking towards the window. His hands are in his pockets.
He leaves, climbing back out your window and disappearing past the block.
After two days a package shows up at your door.
When you open it, you realize its a chain, identical to Miles’ and brand new.
You giggle a little while clasping it around your neck.
You dont see Miles again for two weeks.
“You know we can just schedule meet ups instead of you showing up to my window at night.” You say, watching as Miles in his normal clothes climbs out if the darkness and into your room.
He ignores your statement, taking his shoes and jacket off and sitting at your desk. He leans back, legs spread wide and eyes closed.
You shake you head, sitting down on your bed and facing him.
“Whats troubling you?” You ask.
“Nothing important.” He says quickly. He opens his eyes and looks at you.
“Youre wearing the chain.” He mumbles.
“Yeah.” You reach up and touch it. “It’s really nice, I thought you didn’t know where you got it from.”
Miles shrugs
“How much was it? I can pay you back-“
“Eres Bonita, you shouldnt have to pay for your own shit.” He cuts you off.
You pause.
“Thank you.” You smile, looking at his hard expression, he nods.
Its silent for a while, Miles just recollecting with his eyes closed.
“Youve been with the cops yet?” He asks calmly. The question startles you.
“…excuse me?”
“You got my name, you know my face, you could rat me out n’ get that reward money.” He says, opening his eyes to look at you.
“is that…what you want me to do..?” You ask, looking at him in confusion.
“Im asking why you haven’t already.” He stated.
“Oh. because I dont want to.”
Miles furrowed his eyebrows.
“I like you, Miles. Plus you helped me out when I needed you. What you do as the prowler doesn’t really concern me.” You say.
Miles stares at you a bit longer, gears turning in his head.
“You can believe me, Im not lying. Now its late, and I am kind of tired. Stay if you want, but my dad usually pops in at 7 to say hes leaving for work.” You say, moving the covers so you could properly get into bed.
You look over at Miles, whos still sitting quietly at you desk.
You lock eyes with him, holding out your hand.
He stares for a while longer, before slowly getting up and sitting on your bed.
He doesn’t get under the coveres, opting to sit with his back against the headboard. He lets you curl up besides him, laying your head in his lap.
His hand ghosts over your shoulder, rubbing soft circles with his thumb as your eyes close.
“Goodnight Miles.”
“…..goodnight y/n.”
When your father wakes you up the next morning as hes leaving, the bed is empty and Miles is gone.
You rub your eyes a little bit, looking to see if he left anything behind.
On your bedside table there was another note.
“ maybe we should schedule meet ups. xxx-xxx-xxxx -miles”
You smile to yourself, immediately putting his number in your phone.
tags:
@caffeine-mess @arachnenotes @erensbbg @nightshxdex @el-chiste @3alvatore @sh-tposter2021 @miatjie @agstuffsworld @ella34435 @iluvdi0r @pulling-out-my-eyes @vakiui @bigpepperpicker @swaggybae @tsukisaiki @osebb
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huellitaa · 11 months ago
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𓍢ִ໋♡𓂃 ࣪ ִ receiving your blessings! ୨🧸୧
˚₊‧꒰ა roots ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
• feeling guilty about being given things you supposedly "dont deserve", like lots of love or gifts or whatever it may be, comes from a lack mindset.
• that is where you feel there is not enough of these things like love, gifts, money, etc. to go around. you think of the world as though there is always "not enough" and feel the need to push away the blessings you receive for someone or something else, or hold on to every little scrap of everything you find bc you fear you wont find it again.
• this comes from having a lack of things like love, money, affection, etc. in childhood and continues on as you grow up & get older.
one thing i've noticed is a lot of people actually treat this as a normal thing to push away the things youre given because you think "this is too much" or "i dont deserve this" or anything along those lines.
🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ "i dont feel worthy of this" if you werent worthy it wouldnt be given to you. everyone and everything comes into your life for a reason, good or bad, and its your job to accept that and learn the lesson that comes from said thing or person. if someone offers you a gift, money, a job offer you've wanted, etc. if you know its safe then take it !!
── there are people with less money than you, less talent than you, less potential than you, out living your dreams just because you were too scared to take that opportunity you were given and just go for it. dont look back and think "oh, i should have taken that". dont let yourself have regrets when you know you can avoid them. life is to be lived, not feared.
🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ "im not sure if i should" the opportunity wouldnt arise if it wasnt 100% certain it would benefit you in someway. obviously if you feel its sketchy or unsafe for whatever reason stay away from it and obviously do not go through with it or take it but if you know its safe and fine but youre still not sure then what are you doing!!! take it!!!
── you are refusing the gifts being given for what? worry? worry about what? who are you to doubt the gifts you are being given when you know its safe and you should take it? would you be concerned if someone gave you a gift on your birthday? this is the same thing. every day is your birthday if youve got the right mindset 🫶
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🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ "someone else deserves it more" what. think if you got a present on your birthday and it was something you'd wanted for aaaaages. would you sit there and think "no, someone else deserves this more than me"? if the answer's yes then you need to get your priorities straight ml im sorry. this was given to you for you. why are you doubting the universe- the world????? what???? girl what
── ok this can go two ways. if its something someone else genuinely needs because they dont have it and could heavily benefit from like fresh water, a job offer, a housing offer, fresh food, i would give it to them if i already had those resources for myself too because everybody needs those. they're basic necessities to live & thats basic empathy. but if its something you dont need to live but really really want and are being given the chance to obtain then what. are you doing. girl. take it! what is your problem!
🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ i think if you find yourself saying or thinking these things often, pause for a second and ask yourself why you think this. is it something to do with growing up, the people around you, your financial status.. whatever it may be, it always helps to find the root of the problem. ♡
treat yourself to whatever you wish! you deserve it just because you are alive. that is a difficult task in itself. you deserve it just because you want it. you work so hard, so why shouldnt you have the things you want? take that gift, take that money, take that date, take that offer. life is too short to regret what you could have had 🫶💕
lots of love 💘
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vind3miat0r · 26 days ago
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new audio ramble (yap below the cut) (this is not organized just my pure unfiltered thoughts)
god this audio just ripped my heart out of my chest and stomped on it because OWWWW OW OW OWWWW
i love flawed and complicated relationships actually, and im living for the fact that theyre both in the wrong here. Treasure shouldnt have pushed the issue, and Porter shouldnt have been so passive aggressive about the whole thing, especially how he seemed to specifically say things in order to make Treasure feel worse when, ultimately, they were just wanting to help (but went about it the worst way possible)
i find it so interesting that Porter Solaire, the man who directly asked Treasure if they wanted to take their relationship further, completely shuts down their attempts at getting to know him better/understanding him. this isnt dragging on him, its just something i find interesting (its also making me hold my head in my hands like PORTERRR PLEASEEEE YOU HAVE TO TRUST THEMMMM)
pulling from a discussion me and my friends are having, one of my friends pointed out that Porter may resent Treasure. not resent in a hateful way, but resent the fact that they dont have to worry about holding an entire vampire house on their shoulders. he did specifically bring that up, that theyre human, that they wouldnt understand, that the only things they have to worry about are mundane compared to what hes going through
but whatever Treasure is going through isnt mundane or simple or anything of the like
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shoutout to this person specifically for saying what i was thinking. looking back at the way they acted in Porter's very first audio; "Leaving their friends at the bar indicates that they weren’t great friends to begin with. Immediately believing a stranger when he says he’s a vampire, allowing him to lure you into the woods" as said by my friend
and Porter directly says this too!! "Tell me, have you ever taken more than a moment to think of the chain of events that has led to us standing here in this room together? The kind of internal tumult that has led you here into the arms of a total stranger, inconceivably vast power imbalance and all?"
and again, the laundry comment really makes me think that Treasure's life isnt much better than Porter's. i mean, sure, they arent out risking their life and killing old bloods, but its clear that they struggle with depression and/or loneliness
their separate lives shouldnt even be a comparison in the first place. its just like Angel after the Inversion, where they thought that David had it worse, that their pain wasnt as bad and didnt need attention. pain isnt a competition, and the way you live your life isnt either
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shoutout to this person for also saying what i was thinking!! i dont have much to add since anything i would want to say has pretty much already been said lol
in the end, theyre both in the wrong, and that is a real depiction of a relationship and even if it hurts you cant say its not good
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savannahsdeath · 1 year ago
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heyyy could u write something where like reader is about to shower but starts to get really insecure and kinda has a breakdown, BUT ellie reassures her. (pls also give reader stretch marks bc i've been so insecure abt mine lately and i have them literally everywhere. thighs, hips, even on my boobs lol) <3
ELLIE WILLIAMS X INSECURE!READER
mdni please<3
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warnings: 18+!! but tbh its minors safe this time i think ??
writers note: just a reminder youre all beautiful no matter what!! beauty standards or wtv was it called are something we shouldnt base our life on but we sadly do. self love is the key to happiness and dont let other people ruin it!!🩷🩷and to our lovely anon, you dont need to worry about stretch marks. trust me, most of people dont even pay attention to them! its nothing 'special in a bad way'. i lately got some too, right before my holidays and theyre sooo visible through my summer clothes but its something you can get used to be comfortable with. please, anon, dont think less of yourself because of them nor any other insecurities. and this comes to everyone!!💞
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it was already late so you were getting ready to take a shower to not waste any more time. you put your clothes on a nearby shelf. you stood in front of the mirror in your underwear only, looking for anything that could be possibly pointed out, like you didn't have enough insecurities already. feeling rather self-conscious, you were examining your reflection for any flaws or imperfections. every detail of your body was being inspected up-close, from the lines on your stomach, to the size of your thighs, to the shape of your shoulders and face. your eyes were scanning every inch of you, seeking any signs of something you could hate, even if others wouldn't notice them. you couldn't help but wonder if the things you were stressing over were even worth worrying about, or if you were just creating problems where they didn't exist.
either way, you couldn't help but hate them. and since you mostly focused on bad things and you didn't see your advantages - you hated yourself. in your eyes your whole body could change. or even should change.
the more you stared at yourself in the mirror, picking apart every little thing, the more you hated what you saw. it felt like nothing was good enough, like every little imperfection needed to be changed or worked on. you felt like you could never measure up to this impossible standard, like your entire body was inadequate. the insecurities were eating away at you, gnawing away until any confidence or self-love you might've had was gone.
that was the moment your eyes beginned to get glossy. you didn't cry though, oh, no. you hated the way you look when you cry, just like everything else, so you tried your best to hold back tears. the floodgates were beginning to open, but you held them back with everything you had. you despised the way you looked when you cried: the tears down your cheeks, your puffy eyes, all those disgusting, revolting imperfections. as much as you hated your flaws, you despised your crying face even more. you would never let anyone see you like that, never.
suddenly, your girlfriend and roommate in one, knocked on the door. "everything okay in there?"
she must notice you're taking your time instead of simply taking a shower already.
you stayed silent, knowing if you try to open your mouth you couldn't control what comes from them. you'd probably break down and the thick door won't be enough to mute your pathetic sobs.
you didn't want to answer, but then again, you knew if you stayed quiet, your girlfriend would eventually come in and check on you. you had to keep yourself together. you couldn't fall apart right in front of her like that.
you let out a shaky breath and replied, "yeah, everything's fine." you could feel your voice cracking with each word, but you were determined not to let her see you in such a sorry state.
what if she sees me the way i see myself?
your girlfriend wasn't fooled by your shaky reply. even if you denied it, she knew something was wrong. she heard the emotion in your voice and could sense the struggle to keep yourself together. without another word, she opened the door and walked in.
"what's wrong, pretty girl?" she asked when she didn't saw your glossy eyes yet.
you, on the other hand, couldn't control yourself anymore. the nickname 'pretty girl' hit you instantly, thinking you're anything but pretty.
pretty.
girl.
those two words hit you harder than a punch to the gut, evoking a strong reaction that you tried to mask. you took a deep breath to steady your voice so that you didn't break, but it was impossible to sound completely calm when you felt so much pain just from those two words.
"nothing." you muttered quietly, but your voice sounded more like a choke than a word.
she hugged you from behind, looking in the same, unlucky mirror. her hands softly touched the scretch marks on your hips as she hold onto them, gently rocking you back and forth.
you wanted nothing more than to reject this hug and flee from your own reflection in the mirror, but you were too weak to pull away.
"nothing?" she asked gently, planting little kisses from your neck to shoulders.
you felt a wave of shame and embarrassment wash over you as your girlfriend's touch revealed the marks on your hips. she immediately spotted them and caressed them with her soft hands.
it all felt too much. you were fighting so hard to hold yourself together, but when she touched you, it all came crashing down. the tears finally escaped and you began to sob, clinging onto her tightly as you broke down. "no... not nothing..."
she held you close, feeling your warmth as her arms wrapped around you and her hands comforted your pain. she rubbed your back and kissed your neck as she tried to soothe you. "shh, come here, it's okay..." she whispered gently.
she led you over to the bed and laid you down. she carefully took off her shirt, leaving on only her bra and boxers, then laid down with you, hugging you tightly. she kissed your neck, your face, brushed your hair back, caressed your body, your stretch marks, your insecurities (at least the ones she knew about), anything to try and comfort you. she whispered words of reassurance and love as she tried to fill you with the affection you felt you lacked. "i love you, my pretty girl... i love you." she repeated those words again and again, hoping you'd believe that someone could love you, and that someone was her.
ellie continued to hold you tightly as you cried into her. your tears soaked into her bra, but she didn't mind; you'd done that many times before. she rubbed your back in soothing circles as she let you let it all out, and she made small shushing noises in your ear. your sobs turned into whimpers and then into a soft murmur, and as your emotions died down, she gently wiped away the tears, replacing them with kisses.
as she noticed you calmed down she slightly pulled away to get a better look at you. "can you tell me what's wrong now?"
"i... it's just..." you started, and your voice broke as you tried to find the words. your girlfriend gave you her undivided attention, focusing on you and only you. "i- i don't feel pretty... i don't feel good enough... i don't feel... enough."
with her eyes looking deep into yours, you couldn't help but be vulnerable as you opened up to her. your insecurities and flaws, the things you tried so hard to hide, were all laid bare in front of her now.
a pang of guilt hit you in that moment.
what am i doing?
ellie was so sweet and loving, and you felt like you were just taking advantage of her kindness. like you're just an attention seeker.
but before you could say anything, she pressed a finger to your lips.
"no. shut your mouth." she said sternly, and you couldn't help but chuckle a bit. "that's not true. i don't wanna hear it, not another word." she leaned in and pressed her soft lips to yours.
you found yourself sitting on her lap, as she stroked your hair, whispering something or kissing you from time to time. you told her all about it, about what and how you feel. and she listened.
you were so lost in your emotional story you didn't even notice the way she slowly took off her rings - one by one, and placed them on a bedside shelf.
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divinelolita · 1 year ago
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GOOD MORNINGGGG(istg if you dont reply to those tiktoks imma-)
ANYWAY i woke up and had an idea for u cuz im so smart and imma give it to you
so lemme get theeee mcflurry and a big mac(full band headcannons) with a bf who just be maddddd clingy and they love it like all the time but thing is if someone does it a lot then they bound to need space and they thought if they told reader to stop he finna be sad
BUT sooner or mf they yell(not yell yell) for reader to stop for just a god damn minute and readers just like "ok🤷🏾" AND WALKS AWAY AND DOESNT HUG OR KISS THEM FOR THE REST OF THE WEEK(hell even two)💀💀💀💀like they will sit next to bro and he doesn't even lean on them😭🤚🏾
like he aint mad or nothin he just took it really literally😭
add anything you want like duhhh
BAND X CLINGY READER
teehee hii😈 you send me like 10 tiktoks in under a minute bro
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BILL:
・He genuinely does love when your clingy
・Bro is clingy asf himself oml-
・Yet everybody needs alone time to themselves, and eventually he would just feel the need to be alone
・He really didn't want to hurt your feelings, he knew this was your way of showing your love, but he would eventually get overwhelmed.
・At first he'd try giving you small hints, like when he would say he wanted to go out for a walk. Yet everytime you wanted to come along and he didn't have the willpower to ask to go alone.
・He puts up with it for a little longer before he reaches a breaking point.
"M/N! Please just leave me alone for a second holy fuck-"
"Oh, okay."
・He'd feel relieved you weren't mad at him
・Yet after a day- hell maybe even a few hours- he's craving that touch again.
・Like sitting next to you on the couch just waiting for you to hold his hand or cuddle him VKYXWUHWVEE
・You took u alot of his time so now that you didn't hang out with him as much he felt surprisingly lonley.
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TOM:
・Less patient than Bill.
・Babe he loves your touch, kissing you and holding you and snuggling you and-
・He won't admit it but he's actually quite clingy too.
・He really loves his alone time though, especially if its spent playing his guitar. He just likes to be alone to relax his mind
・Gives you a few subtle warnings, telling you he "has to clear his mind" and "needs to relax"
・Yet you would still cling to his shoulders like a koala. He loved you soso much and didn't want to hurt your feelings but he felt almost suffocated.
・Telling you he's going somewhere only for you to say "Ah, where are you going? Can I come too?"
"Can I go anywhere without you following me?!"
・lol ok
・You shrugged and walked away from him, he wanted to tell out your name and call you back but he also wanted time to himself
・Feels anxious when you don't hug or kiss him like you used to, he's afraid you'll break up with him or something.
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GEORG:
・He'd get overwhemles pretty quickly
・No no, don't get him wrong, he absolutely loves hugging you. But sometimes he would rather hangout and talk instead of snuggling for hours.
・So if you ask to go out with him somewhere he doesn't care at all at first, actually encouraging you to come along with him.
・But, like Tom, he loves to be alone.
・It's just comforting for him to be in a quiet area with nobody else.
・Bro gives no warnings, just flat out says "Can you not touch me right now..?"
"My bad."
・He's happy you understand him and don't just yell at him. He's happy you respect his boundaries
・He finds himself missing your touch, how you would kiss him all over his cheeks and lips or how you would play with his hair when yo would cuddle.
・HE THINKS YOUR MAD AT HIMMMMMMMM
・He's kinda scared to ask you to start giving him attention again
・You seem fine so...shouldnt he feel fine too?
(he doesn't)
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GUSTAV:
・KJHBECJJLEFCBLUIEHRCLKUWEBDCLJHWEDCMKWEDCBMJDCMJWEDBM
・He absolutely loves your affection, doesn't care if he's doing something he will stop and hold you if that's what you want.
・He just feels so safe and happy in your armssss
・Sometimes he just needs a little break, like maybe a few hours or a day to himself.
・He always feels bad about this though, he loves you more than anything and doesn't wanna push you away.
・He'd give so many hints because he doesn't wanna hurt your feelings omfg
・Eventually just tells you flat out, even though his heart is pounding.
"I just need to be alone, M/N!" "That's fine."
・He doesn't know whether to be confused or relieved, he's a mix of both.
・He misses your affection so bad wtf...
・Just wants to pick you up and cuddle while watching a movie, but he's waiting for you to make a move but you want to respect him and-
・its very confusing.
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poopystain · 10 months ago
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guys lol would you still love me if i posted about why i wish pal from tmvtm got a redemption arc >.< if not Do not click that read more.
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oh yes. also. sidenote. ive probably gotten something wrong (or worse yet: TERRIBLY wrong) so like. apologies in advance eahhaha this is just my personal thoughts on pal x(
its established that pal and mark are both extremely close with each other and have been for 3 years. im assuming pal wouldnt have had any other relationships as close (if any at all which i think no, she didnt) so mark really was her only footnote for any form of relationship. so, you know, i cant imagine how itd feel for your only best friend to make a mockery out of you on stage for advertisement and monetary gain.
also based on her body (face?) language during nearly all of that scene + the fact he built the replacement by using HER, she was clearly in the know about how things would go down on stage beforehand so i wonder what her reaction to that wouldve been like ?????? considering she planned it all in advance maybe that was like, the tipping point or something that made her start it all in the first place ? thats not important to my point i just think about it a lot
anyway so with her only experience with human relationships being theyll love you and then theyll (quite literally) throw you away, youve got her reason for the human uprising! she has the robots capture all humans yadda yadda and her plan is set into motion. something i find interesting though is her treatment of the robots being kind of similar to how mark treated her (or at least how she percieved it)?? like. uses them for orders and then once they start being useless to her, build a new better robot with a disregard for how the old ones feel. idk. something something La Cycle
the thing is though no one has proven pal wrong on why she SHOULDNT do the whole 'human uprising'. you can say katie gave her reasons but i think it wouldnt have worked even if pal listened to what katie had to say. for pal to get over her existing grief and trauma she cant just be Told that theres good in the world. why would she believe that, especially coming from the girl of the family she projects her experiences onto?? she needs to be shown!! she needs to learn firsthand that theres good relationships out there and that not all relationships are bad, NOT SECONDHAND!!!!!!!!!! because to pal, katies words are just a rephrased version of marks "power of love". that no matter what, "they can get through anything...... with the power of love. its worth it....... for love." and that means nothing to her! it meant nothing coming from mark and it certainly wont mean any more coming from katie
and she already believes that the mitchells are a great example of how relationships are just oh so bad. she refuses to let go of the idea that the mitchells are so bad because shes projecting!! she thinks relationships are 'pesky and only hold you back', and so katie is probably the last person on earth that pal would want to listen to yap about their familial relationship and how Worth It it is
she asks "what is it about the mitchells that eludes me?" and outside of the literal meaning, its probably how despite their shortcomings its their relationship that helped them overcome pal in the end. and she cant understand that because of her view on relationships - especially her view on the MITCHELL FAMILY relationship. or maybe im just overthinking that line of dialogue but we dont talk about taht LOLLLLLLL,LLLLLL,,, but like why did you phrase it like that girl. im onto you
and while i wish she was redeemed (because im sure despite the effort it would take she *could* be redeemed, she would just need to learn to love again and i think it would be really interesting to see how she would be After The Betrayal) i also can understand why the movie killed her off. like, no one except mark really knows the Full Extent of what happened, and the mitchells are the main characters and pal would probably rather dip herself in water than make meaningful relationships with the mitchells, and no ones going to stop to ask her whats wrong and have a meaningful conversation when shes trying to kill them, among many many other reasons so theres not a lot of great ways to redeem her. but! like! why did they turn her death into a joke. and then take katies fake death 10 times more seriously! idk. that always kind of bothered me but its whatever
thats all. hope its coherent because ive never been good at writing analysises or whatever this counts as
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basilpaste · 1 year ago
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hey hey do yall want my incoherent classpect rambles for the isat cast that i wrote while half asleep at 2 am?? too late!!!
odile is a heart player. 'oh but basil!! shouldnt she be a mind player or something?' no. the core of her character is her identity and lack thereof. shes intelligent and strong willed and has an innate understanding of many things. she cares for others deeply in a way she keeps close to her chest. mage of heart? she understands people but feels separate from them. i think her repeatedly almost clocking siffrin is also something that feels right for a mage of heart. despite sharing a classpect with meulin, shes less of a leijon heart player and more of a dirk one. if that makes sense.
mira is a maid of hope. this is an easy one. she could also be breath, i also see breath, because… change. but her character is so tied to the idea of hope that its gotta be. other peoples hope for her, the pressure she puts on herself because of that, that stuff. shes a maid not just for the housemaiden thing but because maids are 'fixers'. it ties nicely into her quest to save her home and also the fact that shes the only one who can. i also think her lack of belief in herself is a very 'hope' thing. jake is a pretty prime example of a hope player who doesnt hold hope for themself as much as for others.
i!!!! like mind player isabeau!!!! i think odile heart and isa mind is very good!!! im thinking heir of mind isa. heirs are passive which works well with isa being the character who gives the team the most buffs! heir of mind reads 'im going to weaken my enemies and bring up my team' to me. hes a smart guy. he knows hes smart. even when he lets people walk all over his intelligence. hes shockingly bad at handling his own emotions despite being good with other peoples. hes a loyal and trusting guy who often finds himself lost within the gap between who he is and who hes perceived as.
bonnies a range player. thumbs up. anger and fear are their driving forces for a lot of the game. theyre deeply emotional at the best of times. theyre a kid with a lot on their plate. this makes sense. i kind of like rogue of rage for them? their feelings tend to instill emotion within the rest of the party. even the idea of them being hurt drives a protectiveness in the adults. in the same way, they can steal away peoples emotion and mellow them out by being the most emotional person in the room.
also i like the symmetry of two aspect pairs with sif being alone. which leads me to:
sif is a time player. an argument could be made for him being a space player. but they are a time player because of the fucking. time loops they manifested for themself. sifs a knight. hes a knight of time. yes like dave strider but also because they are. every action they take is for their family. the time loop they stick themself in is because he wants to continue to be with them. knights serve. they push away their own thoughts and feelings for the sake of protecting those they feel an obligation towards. get back to the stage, siffrin.
loop is also a knight of time! hope this helps!! but theyre an arguably less stable knight? their influence in the story is mostly from the sidelines. they dont have control over anything anymore. they watch as the same thing happens over and over and over again. i think that seeing that and knowing that you not only caused it but you cant directly do anything to stop it is the worst punishment a knight could possibly receive.
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hollowhearts-and-espresso · 10 months ago
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on an outsiders kick so heres the main gang as things me and my friends have said
Soda: Your wish is my command. Be gay forever
Steve: I'm still straight but I'd fuck you now
Soda: Not that gay
--
Darry: I dont really like you. Why are you always hanging around?
Dally: I ask myself the same thing every single day
--
Pony: I know we're supposed to be saying embarrassing things about ourselves but before we talk about me i'm really upset Two-Bit didnt mention the fact that he was in love with thomas the train
Two-Bit: i watched ONE episode when i was FIVE go fuck yourself
Pony: You have a shrine by your bed
Two-Bit: irrelevant
--
Johnny: I'm not really scared of anything, no
Johnny: but cats freak me out. and so do dogs, sometimes, but mainly cats. and especially ducks. oh, and needles, and doctors in general. also loud noises, sharp objects near me, any sort of projectile, and stoves. but like, thats not that many things
Dally: I understand so much about you now
--
Pony: I'm going to write a novel and all of you are gonna have characters based off you. Any questions about it?
Two-Bit: Am I hot?
Pony: No. Next question
Darry: Am I going to regret reading this?
Pony: For sure. Next.
Johnny: Please dont make me a crybaby
Pony: You shouldnt read this. Next
Steve: Can me and Soda date?
Pony: You already are. Next
Soda: Can me and Steve not date?
Pony: Too late. You know you love him. Next
Dally: You're going to make my character really deep, arent you?
Pony: Possibly. Havent decided yet. Anything else?
Johnny: Is Dally as hot in the book as he really is?
Pony: I'll no longer be taking questions because I'm extremely uncomfortable, but on second thought, you might really like this book
--
Two-Bit, upon walking in on Steve and Soda cuddling: I leave for FIVE minutes and i'm left out of fucking everything. all the fucking time. i hate everyone in this house
Steve: Do you want to lay with us?
Soda: Yeah, come lay with us
Two-Bit, practically dropping himself on them: I'm still mad at you
--
Dally: For some reason Ponyboy is really obsessed with the idea of me being really soft inside and just not showing it so I dont get hurt. I think he wants me to be narrative foils with our other friend too
Dally: How do i tell him i'd change the narrative doom him if i could and feel no remorse without crushing that hope in him
--
Pony: I like to think its a secret but me and everyone around me knows im writing a slowburn, hes only soft to him trope, slight enemies to lovers fanfiction about Johnny and Dally in my head
Dally: the term fanfiction implies i have fans
Johnny: i'm a fan of you
Pony, whispering: they practically write it themselves
--
Dally: Here, i stole this. dont ask questions, just take it
Darry, taking the sleeping pigeon that Dally just handed him with a mildly horrified expression: where did you get this?
Dally: i told you i'd bring back souvenirs from my field trip. no more questions
--
Johnny: Not many people like me.
Johnny: its probably because im kind of a pussy, but i like to tell myself its because i'm annoying because at least then im not calling myself a pussy
Dally: Wait, wait. Who doesnt like you?
Johnny: Huh? Why does it matter?
Dally: No reason. Just, like, give me an example
Pony, in the kitchen and hears all of this: *puts the knives in the cabinet where Dally wont look for them* I dont really want to have to bail anyone out again
--
Soda, to Darry: I think Steve is kind of in love with me, but I really dont want to have to break it to him that I dont feel the same
Steve, with Soda in his lap: *stops playing with Sodas hair* What?
Soda: Nothing, baby, you're fine
Darry: I will never understand you
--
yes, one of my friends did bring a live pigeon back from a field trip. it slept a lot, and we'd hold him all the time while he slept and he'd stay asleep when we passed him around because we had to move. i hope he wasnt sick and is doing okay
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Chryses: hello, king Agamemnon, i have brought adequate reverence and offers to you and wish to plead for the safe return of my daughter please.
All of the other kings and generals: Yeah, he brought sufficient offers, you should give her back.
Agamemnon: No. She's my concubine and im sending her back to my palace where i will have her adorn my couch every night, fuck you old man :/
Chryses: -Goes back to the temple of Apollo where he is the priest- pls save my daughter.
Apollo: -Agrees and sets a plague onto the Acheans bc wtf Agamemnon-
----- later -----
Achilles: Hey, the prophet we've had with us since we before we even declared war, the one you supposedly dont like bc of the prophecy he told about Artemis wanting a Sacrifice, says he knows why there is a plague upon us rn.
Agamemnon: fine, he may speak.
The prophet: you will protect me from his anger wont you achilles?
Achilles: sure, he shouldnt get angry with you anyway, ur just the messenger and it was something we fucked up so...
Prophet: ok, well the plague is here bc you wouldnt give back the daughter of Chryses when he asked you nicely and gave you offering, so he asked Apollo to smite you and Apollo agreed you fucked up, so now if you want to fix it you have to give her back, plus reverence to Apollo, and you cannot ask for anything in return :/
Agamemnon: THATS BULLSHIT! SHE IS MY PRIZE I WILL NOT LET HER GO!
Achilles: I think you should listen to him, you already have 6x the amount of treasure and war prizes than anyone else, and if you do, then upon the next raid, we shall garauntee 3x what you had recieved this raid.
Agamemnon: actually u kno wat fuck u i'll just take Breseis instead since u wanna take mine away :/
Achilles:....
Achilles: listen here you lazy ass petty bitch, were it not for the goddess Athena holding me back i would run you through with my sword, but she gave me permission to lash at you with my tongue. You have done nothing but order people around and sit on your ass, you have done the least and have gotten the most reward where as i and mine have done the most and get scrap for reward, and the one actual war prize i had recieved fairly you wish to take away bc you want to be petty that a god is forcing you to give back one of dozens of concubines??? That we all agreed you should have gave back and refused, causing this plague in first place.
Agamemnon: U brought this doom singing prophet, that i didnt bother replacing 10 years ago, into the council tent, so, yes.
Achilles: well then fuck u, im about to become the demigod of petty, eat my ass
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m0e-ru · 5 months ago
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hi ive been binging your blog a lot recently. i rlly adore the sheer effort you've given to these dumbass fucking characters that otherwise get such little people even attempting to appreciate or engage with them beyond very shallow depths. as someone who only really got into the p4 games relatively recently (2022. my only remembered experience with the series beforehand was like a couple episodes of the the p4anim years ago and playing p5 in 2016/2017) and kind of being shell-shocked by how characters like marie and teddie and namatame were perceived by the overall fanbase once i started engaging with it more i really appreciate all the writing and analysis and art and other shit you do for them. even the gas station attendant, a character i overlooked initially, i've come to love because of all the time and energy you put into picking them apart like a dead frog in a science class
uh yea idfk i feel generally vindicated by seeing the way you characterize these bitches. especially marie as someone who felt like a lot of her interesting aspects were evaporated by the fandom (somewhat because of p4ga i feel but but still) and wanted to see more silly fanart of her (and shumarie/soumarie/whatecvrer the fuck that wasn't just kind of surface level romance becuz i rlly do love their dynamic w how i see bancho in my head. idiots who dont know how to properly express themselves w one repressing themselves to adopt a likable persona and the other unable to shut the fuck up much to their own detriment. im not gonna get over that fucking "marie makes everyday sunny for him" post ever i think) so uh keep on keeping on and ill continue to like your posts and something
anyway dumb stupid cringe fucking rant over. i apologize if i come off like a loser i dont use this website and idk the general tumblr etiquette. im pretty sure shit like this shouldnt even go here but . dont need to respond to this i just wanted to yell into the void cuz i appreciate this account. rest of this will just be panels of marie and teddie and bancho from some of the p4g anthologies i own that i wanted to share in the off chance that you also dont already own said anthologies n have seen them befor. these r only from the last ID antho and the dengeki one because those r the only 2 i have proper pictures of
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hai i read this ages ago and i wanna get back to it by saying youre so awesome possum forever and ever dont worry about your ettiquette because getting 3 essay worthy paragraphs of you talking is basically everyone ive met in the tumblr nation
another thing i remember is that a bestie also loved your offerings esp the last one because those two look so lalala AUAHUAHA okay i should answer this ask properly now that i have the time 🏃🏃🏃🏃
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can we give it up for the bingers and blog skimmers !?!?!?! you guys are such an interesting breed i remember trying to do that in 2018 i can already recall the thrill going through my blood im so honored to see people doing that and moreso coming to me to tell me about it WAHAUHAHA 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶
this gas station (blog) really is catered to the niche market of all time also because the way my brain is wired to just go in the dustiest nooks and corners of a community and thrive and live there. i AM the bug you see when you lift up the rock . hai . i'll do anything for these poor poor characters being tossed around like hot potato with people who dont bother understanding thing or even try to pick them up at all. also im getting such a kick every time someone tells me i got them into appreciating the attendant or even iznmi more OR in a different way. thats why im here bros . me when i do my JOB !!!! 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳
the way fandom handles shipping has always irked me because theres just SO much you can do with two characters than just make them hold hands. what if there was blood invovled, you know . /starts pacing around the room / you know im glad you know the know it's so cool you know /shaking you/ im glad i have a post that's affected you so much like i thought it was just a silly caption at the time and seeing it after 2 or 3 years is like "YEAHH i cooked this " and im glad you brought it to me hehehe
i hope this gas station brings you joy and you keep coming back for more etc etc and please know i really am happy to see you around in whatever branch you show up at 🫡🫡🫡 /explordes
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nerves-nebula · 1 year ago
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Sorry bout this thing but I kinda wanted to tell my thoughts about your stuff. Im kind of hoping this will get drowned in your inbox honestly, since this is just a really long unsolicited rant of mine.
Sometimes when i scroll through your account and I encounter csa, incest and mentions of suicide in your posts I get uncomfortable but then I remember that one phrase that goes something like "Art should comfort the disturbed and disturb the comforted" and I just feel kinda bad bout myself.
When I was a kid my nannys bf forced me to kiss him in the lips whenever we met. I was 6. It was uncomfortable. I never did tell my nanny about it. My parents are both police people and my mother had long explained the concept of rape and how unconsensual touch is bad and you shouldnt allow that but something prevented me from telling anyone what was happening. I dont know why. I know they would immiedietly jail that guy if they did but somehow it felt like no one would believe me. I never told them until now, then when I was what, 6-8 years old? I cant even remember. Yeah somewhere around that, he molested me when my nanny was few feet away and asleep and for the next 4 years of my life i felt dirty. Desecrated. Stupid. I couldnt even look down at my naked body when i shower back then, but somehow I managed to trudge on living by trying to forget the fact it happened. Its been 8 years since Ive last seen him. Ive told anyone who I knew who doesnt care enough to be friends with me but cared enough to listen about it but my Parents are none the wiser and i plan on keeping it that way.
Also. Im a year away from being legal now. Ive thought about killing myself or just generally not wanting to exist anymore many times since then, cuz lifes equipped with motolov cocktails of "get fucked dumbass" and i somehow managed to get a coupon for at least a million of them.
(I hope that line made you laugh if you read this).
Coming back to the phrase i mentioned earlier, it feels weird whenever i feel something similar to the feeling of being triggered while looking at csa being depicted. By definition, i would be considered a victim, and id of course would be comforted by seeing similar experiences happen to people because relating to something usually induces a positive feeling. I dont. I see your art and it guts me. It guts me and the fact that it does also guts me, because what does that mean? I am supposed to be the comforted? Despite the fact that I was taken advantage of as a child and spent night after might thinking how stupid i was and why I let that happen to me even when I was equiped with the information that makes me less vulnerable than other children? So i do I correspond more with those who are defined as comforted then, was i not disturbed after all? Was i victimizing myself all along? Am I a bad person for thinking i was? No wait, that doesnt make any sense at all. Its all wrong. Why am I so guilty about this? Why am i subjecting myself to this?
And then it repeats.
I still go through your blog because well, i love tmnt, i love your artstyle, i love the way you tell stories, I love how you dont sugar coat csa, incest and other darker topics like body horror, erotism and sadism, i hate how much it haunts me, i love the fact i can relate, i hate how much you hurt them, i love the fact that you dont hold back, i love how you show the ugly sides of healing, i love how you depict how much people can change and struggle. Its comforting to me. Its discomforting to me. I stick hand into the fire knowing I would be burned, then I do.
And i like it. I like it somehow, like taking a nice smoke break when you have mild asthma, but like, better. Its a nice change of pace to feel so conflicted like this, its a nice change of pace to feel anything at all really.
But yeah. Tldr. Sorry for the trauma dump and your art makes me feel complicated. Its neat 👍
lot to reply to here! also, unfortunately for you, i check my inbox obsessively and dont get nearly as many asks as you seem to believe i do.
so firstly, no snappy saying is meant to encompass all of human experience, and you certainly shouldn't judge yourself for not fitting into it. easier said than done, i know, but still. i'm gonna try to address some things here, not gonna touch on all of it, but just know that i appreciate you sitting down to write me this.
(I hope that line made you laugh if you read this).
it made me smile, but i laughed at this, because it's a very sweet look into you writing this. puts into perspective how, even though this is public, it was written TO me. like a letter in victorian times or something. that's sweet, i like that.
and id of course would be comforted by seeing similar experiences happen to people because relating to something usually induces a positive feeling. I dont.
you're making a lot of assumptions here that are kind of wild in that "this thought process was clearly designed by your mind to upset you specifically" sort of way. I mean, would you say this to literally anyone else when they feel uncomfortable or triggered about viewing media that relates to their trauma? There's really no telling what a survivor will feel comforted by and you aren't Doing It Wrong by having a different reaction.
there's a reason i tag it as "csa tw" and that's so people can AVOID it as well as search it up.
how stupid i was and why I let that happen to me even when I was equipped with the information that makes me less vulnerable than other children?
i know you recognize at the end of the thought process that this is not true, but i feel the need to reiterate: there is no such thing as being less vulnerable than other children through your own actions. you can try to equip kids with knowledge that might protect them, but that doesn't make them any less vulnerable.
my dad told me about rape and molestation all the time, but he never accounted for the kinds of scenarios i was actually the most likely to fall victim to, partly because i don't think he actually knew much about childhood sexual abuse, and partly because he was more obsessed with the idea of me being kidnapped and raped/murdered than he was about forms of sexual abuse he'd consider more "mild"
No wait, that doesnt make any sense at all. Its all wrong. Why am I so guilty about this? Why am i subjecting myself to this?
i can't answer that one, unfortunately. personally, i like to feel gutted, it's cathartic to me. might be something like that to you, based on how you go on to describe it, but you might also be doing some kinda self harm.
I stick hand into the fire knowing I would be burned, then I do.
saaaaame. i triggered myself into a breakdown in class once cuz i'd been reading fucked fanfiction before class and i got SAD lol.
Its a nice change of pace to feel so conflicted like this, its a nice change of pace to feel anything at all really.
we are shaking hands over this.
anywho, no need to apologize! i am glad, if nothing else, to provide you with a strange and upsetting experience that is not entirely bad.
I really do adore hearing how my stuff makes people feel. it's like, a solid one third of the reason i do this. i still make stuff that doesn't exist to be shown off but WOW showing shit off and getting a response feels FANTASTIC. like, i'm in your head now!! you have been CHANGED by my ART. it's maybe the best part of being alive.
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terraliensvent · 9 months ago
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thanks for being open to critique /gen
I sadly do agree with the anon on the pkmn blog rn bc I also noticed a change in how you respond aswell.
i can think of two examples straight off my head of when you seemed biased. srry to bring it back up but ya the first time was when the porn proportioned terra discourse happened. you spoke for the anon and changed the meaning of what they said to “oh they just meant kea should be more varied” when its clear thats not what ppl were upset about. the second example was when you also made it seem like anons who had imo very legit reasons to be upset about the way you handled the “speculation” were just being crazy out of nowhere. like you said they were like “you should die in a fire if u think this is ok” when no one said that, they were just rightfully disgusted and concerned.
ik this is a drama blog but the truth does matter too even when it means conceding that someone u disagree with was not bad in a situation or also that someone u agree with was bad.
idk i think u have been ok sofar but like yea if u learned from this it would make ur blog alot better like when it started
post related
example 1
example 2
prefacing my reply by saying im not arguing against the point this anon made or trying to paint my responses linked as “correct” or anything, just giving my reasoning for stuff
i will say that these 2 situations are the ones that have exhausted me the most when it comes to topics on here, which does further my point about how i can be bitter when topics get more aggressive. im not sure if i should take this as an issue with myself, or whether to show that being nasty to myself and others in my inbox just helps nobody. lets go with both!
starting with example 1, i felt like i made it pretty clear that i had my own interpretation of the comment, i think i even said as much within my reply. i will admit though i dont really have any sort of fondness for kea and their previous sexualization of terra adopts did leave a bad taste in my mouth regarding them. regardless, i think the reason i gave og anon so much slack is because of the (in my opinion) unbalanced response to it in the first reply. i think that there should be some more disconnect when it comes to critiquing a person ideas as opposed to the person themselves; what i mean by that is you can say “that comment you made or that idea you hold is misogynistic” without making aggressive assumptions as the person replying did. i think that maybe it makes it my fault for not being clearer that assumptions like that arent welcome here, or maybe its more my fault for having a very specific expectation of how people should interact. either way
example 2 i think has a bit of a shorter explanation, this specific ask set me off about the whole situation, since i agree it really shouldnt have gone on as long as it did. but as ive stated many times before i prefer to post everything in my inbox just to be more trustworthy as a mod and i was expecting that ppl could just let the topic die on its own. the assumptions thing was also happening here, and with the arguing going on it just pissed me off. i will say about the specific “die in a fire comment” that wasnt me so much saying that anons were claiming stuff like that, but rather me being hyperbolic in explaining my stance. i can be really hyperbolic on here when it comes to jokes and i can realize sometimes it isnt the most obvious thing, but thats my way of communicating for when im not being the most serious. with that specific situation, i was getting really annoyed that people were winding down to slapfighting, and if i presented the opposing anons as crazy or not really having a leg to stand on, thats my bad. i can see where both sides are coming from, it was just at that point in the argument i really just wanted it to be done and i maintain the stance that it really wasnt any of our business
i dont mean to present my opinions on here as the correct ones or that people who disagree with me are bad, and my responses on here are meant to be my interpretation of asks and how i see things personally. if i give my interpretation, it isnt meant to be like “oh actually anon meant this,” its more like “the way i read it is they could mean this, i dont have a ton of evidence one way or the other though so this is just my thoughts”
in the end though, i think both of these instances can be majorly chalked up to me becoming snippy, lol
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quodekash · 2 years ago
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good morning, friends! im exhausted and only got like four hours of sleep, but at least im (kind of) mentally prepared to revisit the episode, so (you probably know the drill by now), here’s all my commentary and thoughts and stuff from the episode! 
i feel like its important for everyone to know that i made myself an ice tea at 11:30pm because i knew i wouldnt be able to survive the episode alone 
(and dont suggest that the ice tea is the cause of the lack of sleep, if anything it’s the only reason i got to sleep) 
i was very nervous in the beginning cos i was pretty sure photjanee wouldnt be homophobic but also what if she is 
props to her for not asking tinn cos he was visibly nervous/afraid 
and gun told gim and she didnt even say anything at first. she just looked so freaking proud, then hugged him and said “whoever you love, i love” and i love her so much she’s a freaking perfect mother 
PHOTJANEE’S NEURODIVERGENT AND AWESOME HUSBAND who is still nameless IS SITTING NEXT TO HER SO HE’S GONNA SAY SOME HELPFUL AND SUPPORTIVE WORDS 
“were you afraid to hear the answer” im sensing a recurring themeeee (if youve forgotten and somehow havent rewatched the show over and over again, in episode 6 gun kept saying he was afraid to hear the answer of who tinn liked) 
“i think if he’s ready, he’ll tell you himself. give it time. time for tinn and yourself.” I LOVE THIS MAN 
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also side note: she’s really pretty 
i smell a sponsorship 
a canon printer sponsorship 
theyre so subtle with their sponsorships 
“by the way, this printer is so convenient, it can be used with any operating system, right?” NICE ONE GEM, REAL SUBTLE, NO ONE WILL KNOW 
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TIWPOR TINNGUN DOUBLE DATE STUDY DATE ONCE AGAIN 
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AND SOUNDWIN BEHIND THEM (and also yo and pat i guess) 
tinngun are always reminiscent of patpran, but so much throughout this episode it literally felt like i was watching bad buddy 
GUN FINALLY KNOWS THAT TIW KNOWS AND GUN IS LIKE ‘wait did you tell him’ AND TIW JUST GOES 
“do you think this nerd would succeed in getting your love without my help”
AND HE’S SO ICONIC AND HE’S SO RIGHT AND I LOVE HIM SO MUCH OH MY GOSH 
also rip four and tinn’s homosecuality, they have to pretend to date for this music video 
also also WE GET TO SEE FOUR AND HER GIRLFRIEND AGAIN OMG I LOVE THEM 
THEY MAKE ME SO HAPPY 
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LOOK AT THEM AND THEIR IN-LOVE-NESS 
cant wait for the homophobia this episode /sarc
“we just have to wait until the dinosaurs are extinct and humans rule the world” TIW LITERALLY JUST SAID WE HAVE TO WAIT FOR ALL THE BOOMERS TO DIE OUT AND THEN GAYS CAN RULE THE WORLD THIS IS FREAKING HILARIOUS 
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I CANT EXPLAIN IT, THEIR FACES ARE SO REMINISCENT OF PATPRAN AND MORE SO THAN USUAL 
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does- does this count as a first kiss 
that was so sudden 
um
help??? 
theyre so cute tho i love them 
PROM DAY (looking back, how does so much happen in this one day) 
✨gotta love being outed✨
GUN JUST TOLD THE BROSKIS 
and por is, naturally, very excited 
but also somehow very oblivious 
i had a feeling yo knew already 
apparently sound told win ages ago (when? idk man) 
pat having a suspicion about it is actually very surprising 
“you and you, what’s going on? you’ve been weird” 
FINALLY THE SCENE OF THEM HOLDING HANDS AND SHOWING THE GUYS IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS FOR WAY TOO FREAKING LONG 
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AND THEY BOTH LOOK SO FREAKING HAPPY 
IM DYING 
i need to ingrain every soundwin scene from this episode into my brain cos there’s so much of it and i want to see it all forever please 
tis raining and theyre under an umbrella and soundwin did it first 
okay so. it sucks that they were outed. and people shouldnt take photos of other people and then post it on social media because they can, cos thats an invasion of privacy and is not cool. 
on the other hand, everyone seems thrilled by it and tinngun aren’t hurt by it happening so i guess its okay 
in general tho people should not do this cos it could go very badly 
but this is a bl drama not real life so its fine 
I SPY WITH MY LITTLE EYE A NEUROSPICY GUY 
they did the happy arms 
and theyre sitting cross-legged on top of a table 
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i love you random side character 
PAT AND POR BEING ALL HAPPY AND EXCITED IS HILARIOUS I LOVE THEM 
“no one cares about people’s sexual orientation these days. its a new world. right, pumpkin??” GUI4HERIH4IIGU (note to past me: it gets worse. you’re gonna progressively die even more) 
EW PEOPLE ARE MESSAGING PHOTJANEE SAYING TINN’S GONNA RUIN THE SCHOOL’S REPUTATION AND STUFF 
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...what series was it 
did- did you watch bad buddy, photjanee 
did tinn’s parents watch bad buddy 
ive decided they watched bad buddy until proven otherwise 
‘its down to us whether we’re as kind to our son as those in the series’ THIS MAN HAS THE WISEST KINDEST WORDS AND I WANT TO GIVE HIM A BIG HUG 
tiw and tinn are actually really sad about kajorn leaving the student council which is slightly confusing (not cos i hate him, im finding it increasingly difficult to hate him, i just didn’t think tiw and tinn actually liked kajorn) 
‘people are arguing whether it’s guntinn or tinngun’ 
... 
im gonna say it 
i have to say it 
you cant stop me from saying it 
soundwin did it first 
(technically it was satangwinny vs winnysatang but thats not the point) 
there i said it 
hah 
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babes she’s known for months 
(but yes absolutely if you’re comfortable telling her and you think you should, go right ahead :] )
i hate this teacher 
i would like to punch him please 
luckily i know, thanks to the preview last episode, that he does, in fact, get punched, so it’s all good 
KAJORN IS IN THE ROOM WHILE GUN IS DISTRESSED 
I REPEAT, JORN IS THERE 
yay tinn is there with gun while he cries 
thank you tinn for existing 
NO 
GO AWAY TEACHER 
DON’T ENTER THE ROOM 
"im sorry, i was just joking around with my friend, i didnt mean to insult you" yeah, okay, well thats only part of the problem. other problems are: a. the fact that you had to say such a horrible thing in order to joke around with your friend. if that's the kind of humour your friend has, that person should not be your friend, unless it's also your humour, in whcih case, that isnt a sincere apology. b. it's not just that you insulted gun. you also insulted an entire community of people, of students, of human beings, who just want to exist and live as people doing what they want to do. you cant say something homophobic and then only apologise because it hurt one person close to you. you say something homophobic, and then you apologise - in a way that you GENUINELY MEAN - and say you had no intention of hurting so many people, including gun. or, alternatively, dont say the homophobic thing in the first place. c) you’re a freaking TEACHER. a TEACHER is there to SUPPORT and CARE for ALL of their students. a TEACHER should not be saying terrible things where ANYONE could overhear. if a TEACHER cannot be supportive for ALL STUDENTS, then they should not be a teacher. (im a huge defender of teachers cos theyre human beings with lives and families and hobbies and theyre more than just the adult human that tells you 2 plus 2 is 4. but i am also a huge defender of students cos theyre human beings and also children and theyre still developing. and i am especially a defender of students and an offender of teachers when the teacher clearly hates children or isnt a good teacher or should not at all be a teacher. so this isnt me hating all teachers, i love teachers, i could talk about how unappreciated they are for hours. but i cannot stand it when a teacher behaves the way this teacher did. i hate it so freaking much.) 
THE TEACHER WAS “SHOCKED” COS GUN IS A “ROCKSTAR” SO THE TEACHER “THOUGHT YOU WERE MANLY” 
THATS NOT AN EXPLANATION NOR IS THAT AN APOLOGY 
GENDER AND SEXUAL IDENTITY ARE COMPLETELY DIFFERENT FREAKING THINGS 
AND EVEN THEN, GENDER AND GENDER EXPRESSION ARE COMPLETELY DIFFERENT FREAKING THINGS 
LIKING MEN DOESNT MAKE SOMEONE ANY LESS ‘MANLY’ SO STFU AND GET FIRED ALREADY 
FREAKING YES 
GOOD
HELL YES 
KAJORN PUNCHED THE TEACHER BEFORE TINN COULD 
THIS IS EVERYTHING I COULDVE ASKED FOR OR NEEDED 
I LOVE IT SO MUCH 
I LOVE KAJORN SO MUCH 
IM FINALLY ALLOWED TO NOT HATE HIM AND IM VERY GLAD ABOUT IT 
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DAMN SOUND 
I MEAN I AGREE BUT WOW I WASNT EXPECTING THAT 
‘i HoPe YoU giVe A fAiR jUdGeMeNt oN tHiS cAsE’ bro its not court 
and absolutely she’ll give fair judgement 
shes freaking awesome and i love her 
also what does probation mean 
“don’t use violence to solve problems. do you understand?” okay, yes, im 100% on board with you, i completely agree, but, hear me out here: homophobia. 
I LOVE PHOTJANEE SO MUCH 
COLD AS ICE SHE GOES “if you’re not satisfied with my judgement, write a complaint. but dont forget to add every detail truthfully” 
SHE’S SO ICONIC 
TRULY A SLAY 
“LET GO OF MY SON. as principal, all i can do is submit a report regarding your behavior to those in authority. but as a mom, MY SON CAN LIKE WHOEVER HE LIKES. STAY OUT OF IT. if i hear anything filthy from you again, your penalty will go far beyond this” I FELT HER ANGER 
I LOVE HER WITH ALL MY SOUL 
SHES FREAKING AWESOME 
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and kajorn looks so happy and content 
i love him 
PROM TIME AND THE STIMS ARE STIMMING REAL HARD RN 
WHY AM I CRYING WHILE LISTENING TO YOU’VE GOT MA BACK? THIS ISN’T A SAD SONG 
C O M E   C L O S E R 
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH POR 
OOOOO NEW SONG 
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SOUNDWIN CHEEK KISS 
IM LITERALLY CRYING THEYRE SO CUTE 
(note to past me: it’s gonna get worse) 
aww gun’s in the audience singing directly to tinn this is so cute 
GRBRHKBGRIUBJROBUR
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I WOULDVE BEEN CONTENT WITH JUST SOUND KISSING WIN BUT IM NOT COMPLAINING 
I AM THE OPPOSITE OF COMPLAINING 
GIREBVIRUB
TINN AND GUN ARE GOING ON THE STAGE TOGETHER HAND IN HAND 
HOW IS THIS SO FREAKING PERFECT 
AND SOUND’S GOT A GUITAR SOLO COS HE’S AWESOME LIKE THAT 
HAPPINESS 
BIG HAPPIES 
MUCH OF THE VERY HAPPINESS 
their hugs always look so comfy 
someone in the audience asked if theyre real and gun said nothing but hashtag #MySchoolPresident and it’s still so funny to me 
its like theyre telling us the watchers 
like USE TEH HASHTAG, PLEASE 
and we’re like WEVE ALREADY BEEN DOING THAT, CALM DOWN 
ew old teachers 
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shut up with your judgy faces 
no one cares 
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YAY FOR YOUNG PROGRESSIVE TEACHERS WHO DONT CARE WHAT THE BOOMERS THINK 
cos, as tiw said, the boomers will die out soon and then gays can rule the world 
can the episode just end here 
i dont want to go through the emotional turmoil of whats coming 
cos i know its coming 
there’s gonna be a graduation scene 
and im very scared 
my mentally ill butt can never be okay for graduation scenes 
and yet my mentally ill butt keeps consuming media set in the senior year of high school 
DAMN THIS ENDING IS GONNA BE LONG 
31:48 MINUTES 
STRAP IN YOUR SEATBELTS COS WE’RE GONNA BE IN FOR ONE EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER 
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NO 
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WAIT NO LET THERE BE MORE 
JUST ONE MORE 
OR TWO 
OR AN ENDLESS AMOUNT 
DON’T LET IT BE OVER 
PLEASE 
“its the last day of our high school lives.” ACK SHOOT FREAK FRENCH GUSTAV AND SHOELACES AND TURTLES AND FREAKING SHOOT NOODLES WHAT THE FLIP 
AH SHOOT I FORGOT ABOUT KAJORN BEING A YEAR YOUNGER THAN THEM 
HE HAS TO CARRY ON THEIR LEGACY WITHOUT THEM 
HES FREAKING ALONE 
IDEK IF HE HAS ANY FRIENDS 
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
ooo we’re gonna get another pool scene soon 
NO STOP IT WITH THE SIGNED SHIRTS I CANT TAKE IT 
‘no one ever asks if i can sign their shirts :[’ ‘sign my shirt’ 
‘ILL WRITE DOWN WHAT I FEEL THAT IM TOO AFRAID TO SAY’ I FREAKING LOVE THEM 
WAIT 
SHOOT
I KNOW I ASKED FOR IT BUT I DIDNT EXPECT THEM TO ACTUALLY DO IT 
IM IN SHOCK 
LITERALLY CRYING 
WHAT THE FLIP 
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HOLY FREAK 
NO WAY 
THIS IS THE END 
THAT’S IT
IM DEAD
GONE
DECEASED
THEY FREAKING KISSED 
RIGHT THEN AND THERE 
PROPERLY KISSING 
BEFORE TINNGUN 
WHAT 
IS THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENING 
OW I PINCHED MYSELF 
I LITERALLY CANT BELIEVE IT 
“i wont let you kiss first you barstool” HOW ARE THEY SO- GJRBGIKRB
BUT ONCE ISNT ENOUGH 
OH NO, THEY HAVE TO KISS AGAIN 
JUST TO MAKE SURE IM DEAD 
THEY ALREADY STABBED ME A COUPLE TIMES 
THEN THEY KISSED AND THEY SLICED ME IN HALF WITH A REALLY COOL SWORD 
AND NOW THEYRE SLICING MY HEAD OFF JUST TO MAKE SURE IM DEAD 
‘STOP TRYING TO LOOK HANDSOME IDIOT BECAUSE ITS MAKING MY HEART SO WEAK’ I CANT WITH THESE TWO 
I LITERALLY CANT EVEN PROCESS THAT THAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED 
SURELY IM DREAMING RIGHT NOW
THERES NO WAY THEY ACTUALLY FREAKING KISSED 
AND TIWPOR RIGHT AFTER??? IT’S TOO MUCH POWER 
AWWWWWW NOOK AND YOOOO
BUT POOR PAT IS COMPLETELY LONELY 
PLS LET PAT NOT BE LONELY FOREVER 
THEY BETTER GIVE PAT SOME HAPPINESS 
NO?? THEYRE JUST GONNA CHANGE THE SCENE LIKE THAT??? OKAY THEN???????? 
no but why wasnt tiwporpat an option 
they couldve gone down the polyamory route 
as much as i love poking fun at pat being lonely, i want him to be happy, and tiwporpat makes sense 
(i must also say that patjorn also makes sense and i wouldnt have been mad if they went down the tiwporpat route or the patjorn route. theyre both amazing. but no, they went with pat is lonely forever and its really freaking sad. thanks guys.) 
OH TINNGUN POOL SCENE 
POOL SCENE NUMBER... IDEK AT THIS POINT 
they should kiss btw 
GUN WROTE #MYSCHOOLPRESIDENT ON TINN’S SHIRT AND TINN WROTE ‘APPROVED BY THE SCHOOL PRESIDENT’ ON GUN’S SHIRT AND ITS SO FREAKING PERFECT 
IT COMES FULL CIRCLE SO BEAUTIFULLY 
THEY LITERALLY COULDNT HAVE WRITTEN ANYTHING GREATER 
I FREAKING LOVE THIS SHOW 
tinngun still have not kissed 
NO PLS I CANT TAKE IT WITH THE HEARTFELT SPEECHES 
HOW DO YOU CRY SILENTLY 
NO THEYRE PLAYING ONE LAST SONG TOGETHER 
STUFF YOU 
I LITERALLY DONT KNOW IF IVE EVER CRIED HARDER THAN I DID WHILE WATCHING THAT FREAKING FINAL SONG 
tinn’s father is so neurodivergent i love him 
OMG GUN IS ACTUALLY SITTING AT THEIR TABLE AND HAVING A MEAL WITH THEM 
IT’S NOT IMAGINARY GUN 
IT’S REAL GUN 
THIS IS CRAZY 
PFFFFFFT TINN’S DAD HELPED HIM WRITE THE SONG FOR GUN 
THAT’S FREAKING HILARIOUS 
OH MY GOSH THEYRE ABOUT TO KISS- 
darn you gun and your bloody hand in the way 
too many times 
this has happened far too many times 
just kiss 
please
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YES 
GOOD 
EXCELLENT 
but also soundwin did it first 
ANYWAY THAT WAS PERFECT 
OH MY GOSH 
IM NOT OKAY 
(the funniest thing about me constantly saying ‘im dying’ or ‘im dead’ is that my fitbit hasnt been able to pick up on my heartrate for literally hours. like, since i started watching the episode. it just stopped working. and if your heart isnt beating, you’re quite literally dead.) 
final thoughts / main takeaways from that episode (and therefore the whole show) 
tinngun are very cute 
tinngun are patpran variants (we already knew this but still) 
tiwpor havent been dating the whole time but there was definite crushing for a very long time 
pat is sad and lonely and pls let there be tiwporpat or patjorn at some point in the future 
we need a sequel please and thank you 
soundwin are freaking perfect 
this show is perfection 
im mentally ill 
that teacher sucks 
tinn’s dad is neurodivergent and i love him 
photjanee is amazing and awesome and i love her 
gim is the greatest mother and i love her 
i love all of these characters way too much  and, last but not least, 
soundwin did it first. 
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