#she deserved so much better than the treatment this show gave her

[euphorix-moon]

Lyricist

Musician!Ellie x Fem!Reader

Synopsis: You and Ellie longing for each other after your breakup

Warning: Just an angsty fic

A/n: It's definitely been a while since i've posted here but i've missed writing here so i'm just tryna get back into the groove of things, this work might be a lil rusty

It's been a year since you and Ellie had broken up and went separate ways. You were devastated when Ellie came to up to you one day saying that it would be better if you two broke up. Her music career was just starting to blow up and she thought that it would be the best for both if you guys ended things so she could focus more on her career.

Although you were upset Ellie thought that her career was more important than the relationship you two had developed you wouldn't try and fight her. What would even be the point of trying to get her to stay. You didn't want to carry the guilt of potentially holding her career back

The breakup had gone way smoother than Ellie had expected,and it had hurt Ellie more than she expected. Although she had prepared herself for this, it still hurt to see things end. She had wanted and hoped you'd fight for the relationship just a little more. It hurt Ellie a lot to end things right here especially after how much you have helped her, but it wasn't really her choice. Ellie had worked so hard to get where she is in the music industry, once one of her songs started blowing up her company had not wasted time in trying to promote her. Ellie was extremely grateful for this opportunity but, the only problem was that her agency was really working her hard to the point where she didn't really have much time to spend with you anymore. You didn't mind Ellie not being around as much because you knew this was her dream and you wanted to support her through every step of the way but, Ellie thought you deserved way more than the treatment you were getting from her and her hectic work schedule. It put Ellie in a tight corner but eventually she called it quits with you.

Since that day Ellie has worked hard and she had finally became a mainstream artist. You would walk around your city and see pictures of her plastered around almost every corner. There was a very bittersweet feeling within you, one half of you couldn't help but be proud of her but another part of you couldn't help but loathe seeing her after that day she left you high and dry. Although you do resent her for what she did, you can't help but still miss her. You'd think about the days where Ellie would show you the drafts of her songs or the days where she would ask you to help her come up with new lyrics to her song. Once in a while you do take the time to listen to her music and every time you do it gives you a wave of nostalgia when everything was good for you.

Ellie had always loved writing her songs about her experiences in life and had built a fanbase around people who could relate to her or just liked the vibe of her music. Her most popular songs and the songs she wrote the most about were about you, deep down she missed you a lot and whenever she was in a mood (which was pretty often) she started writing about you two and the time spent together. Wether it be bad or good she found herself cherishing all these moments she had with you. She found herself regretting leaving you and wishes she could get you back.

After getting more mainstream, Ellie had tried to get back into the dating scene to at least gain some,a sort of normalcy that she craved for. Recently Ellie has found herself getting more lonely and just wanted the feeling of having someone by her side, these feelings reminded her a lot about you and the comfort that you gave her but she doubted that you would want her back after how she left you. She had tried but there are little to no people who are actually genuine with her. She felt as if nobody could get past the fact that she famous and it seemed as if they just wanted to get near her just for the sake of it. After long days, she just wanted someone to lean on but after she had left you she found herself alone. With all these feelings sitting in her system she finds herself writing them all out into her songbook. She never expected these songs to get out in the first place but after her manger found her songbook it was over for her.

You spend time working in your cafe, the radio is always playing throughout the restaurant just to give the customers something to listen to. On numerous occasions you have heard Ellie's songs playing on the radio but you usually just tune it out, Until one day when the cafe was running pretty slow, you just happen to catch the lyrics of her song and wonder if there is still hope that she may come back to you.

A/n: Hopefully yall enjoyed and maybe i may make a part 2 where they reunite

[hrzwrm]

alice <3

[sukunasweetheart]

That schoolboy sukuna art you reblogged got me thinking🤔its a bit basic but still😵‍💫 tsundere bully!sukuna being so mean to popular!reader cause he likes her‼️ Anytime one of his friends suggest that he likes her, he gets 10x meaner. Meanwhile reader genuinely thinks the dude that just tore up her homework HATES her. Then one day he goes too far and really embarrasses her so she starts crying while her friends try to comfort her (he threw dirty water on her or something🤷‍♀️) Obviously readers had enough of him so she confronts him the next time they see each other alone, only for that dude to end up blurting out how much he likes her. Readers standing there flabbergasted😦🧍‍♀️ and then tells him off (he deserves it💀) . They dont see each other until their highschool reunion 5 years later(?) Sukunas matured alot but of course readers still hesitant to even talk to him. Blahblahblah he apologizes, reader forgives him after they hang out a few times and then BOOM dating‼️

This was such a anticlimactic end but i hope you get what i mean. Reader doesn't start liking him until monthsss after the reunion. Sukuna still seeing her as his first love/crush except he's not a weirdo about it anymore. And cause he probably just threw all his focus on taking over the family business (this is canon gege told me)

Literally i lowk fw this idea sooo hard... like childhood bully that grows up around you, little sukuna has always been a harrassing you ever since youve moved into the neighbourhood, and it carries over into highschool as well...

Its like, to the point where you have personal beef with him, always ready to square up when he's around...

but the fact that he never has his lackeys with him when he does bully you, and the one time someone did try to give you some silly treatment while he was watching, he gave him the beating of his life behind closed doors...

Sukuna having silly wet dreams of you and then being extra mean the next day. You retaliate physically, giving dainty little punches and kicks, you know, the kind that does zero damage, but for some reason he backs off easier than usual that day and walks away, muttering something under his breath, something that you can't quite hear clearly.

after all those years of pretending to hate you by calling you names and teasing you relentlessly, sukuna has the gall to confess right after graduation. he just blurts it out kind of accidentally, in the spur of the moment, because he feels like it'll be his last chance to ever come true with his feelings.

except, he ends up getting the scolding of his life, as you tell him off for the pestering way he's treated you, only for him to turn around and tell you he has feelings for you?! you tell him that it was cowardly of him, and he should take this as a lesson to treat the people he likes better, before turning on your heel and leaving him in the dust. you're his first love, and also his first heartbreak.

couple of years later, there's a highschool reunion happening, and although you wanted to avoid it because of the awkwardness of having to meet sukuna, you still ended up going because you really miss your old highschool friends.

you're at a nice restaurant with your buddies, enjoying your time, yet also noticing sukuna's missing presence in the back of your mind... you probably think he's not coming to avoid you. not that you care for it.

things were going smoothly, but then he eventually did show up. late to the party, as if he were the protagonist... everyone goes silent for a moment when he shows up, because he's arguably changed the most out of you all...

the rather bold tattoos done all over his body, piercings, and the black nail polish, how much he's bulked up in muscle. and that black button-up shirt is... well, very erotic. no longer that awkward, juvenile teenager you've always pictured him as. sukuna was never ugly per se, but goodness, this kind of glow up was really unexpected. and it turned out that he ended up taking over his family business, which kept him quite busy the past few years.

you catch his eye for a moment across the table, but you quickly look the other way. maybe he might've gotten hotter over the years, but you're not sure about that damn personality of his.

it seemed like he was finding it difficult to approach you in front of everyone else - he chases after you only when the meeting is over, and everyone had begun to go home. you feel a little nervous about the encounter, but the first thing he does is apologise, which gets you feeling a lot better about him as a person. sometimes, time does change a person.

and then sukuna tells you he wants to take you out for a meal, and asks you for your number... your old, easygoing self takes over for a moment. certainly a meal or two wouldn't hurt, would it?

(sukuna goes home and starts kicking his feet in bed that night, after scoring your number - beginning his lovesick era.)

[nastyburger]

Please say more about the awful Asian designs in Danny Phantom. I'm not Asian but I'd love to have a rundown on the elements that make them offensive so I can avoid and critique those elements in other works. And also you deserve to speak your mind about it

im gonna mostly talk about southeast asian designs since thats what i am and the most familiar with and also what i feel are the show's worst transgression with their casual depictions. tw for racist imagery im gonna link pictures.

there's not much to say about the designs aside from, you know, everything but things to note are the unnatural yellow tone for the skin and closed slanted eyes. veggie burger (fan name for the bg character in the middle) also suffers from the huge nose that sometimes shows up in racist depictions. the straight edge/cut hair as well is somewhat stereotypical. this one isn't as bad but in conjunction with everything else its not ideal. i will give the smallest molecule of credit that at the very least dp never gave any of these bg characters buck teeth.

some depictions are better than others, but theres still missteps happening in one aspect or another. kwan's eyes in a lot of shots/episodes can be too skinny and even too slanted, the girl in the middle is almost perfect but her skin is too yellow (she looks kinda okay on my computer screen but i remember when watching dp on my tv she looked real brightly yellow), and principle ishiyama (who was weirdly forgotten about pretty early on in the show and was replaced by lancer doing most of the school stuff despite not being principle?? which is a whole other issue with how dp treats its poc characters) the same usual notes about the slanted eyes but also the upturned nose is pretty reminiscent of racist japanese art during ww2. again it is not the worst way to draw a nose but combined with everything else in this show's depiction of asian characters its not great, they are on thin ice man.

not to mention, principle ishiyama is the only character here with brown eyes. this is a problem that extends to all poc characters in dp and to my knowledge i think ishiyama might be the only one with them tbh. this is, again, a whole other issue though.

i think the thing that bothers me most about these designs though is that dp is very clearly aware that these depictions are bad. the only difference between the first set of characters and the second is one singular thing: they have a clear speaking role.

suddenly when theyre not stock background characters, dp knows how to act when drawing them. i cannot for the life of me find the image of it, but the last jock guy in the first set gets a speaking role in reign storm (he's cosplaying phantom) and he is drawn with proper open eyes! (theyre also blue but whatever) it just makes me sad that this was a clear choice they made.

the show also went in a different direction in the final product, but early development stuff was really drawing from a lot of japanese/asian influences like danny was originally gonna have a motorcycle (pulling from ghost in the shell) and was even referenced in the show via the akira motorcycle reference (which i once again, for the life of me, cannot find. danny took johnny 13's motorcycle and did the classic akira slide i think it was in million dollar ghost?? idk whichever one where the giw are trying to blow up the ghost zone). danny's name was originally gonna be jackie, named after jackie chan, this i assume was given to jack fenton afterwards. and i think the show having a more martial arts direction with the action was also gonna be a thing? that one could be wrong dont quote me on that, there was an episode where danny and vlad have like a weird ninja fight though im pretty sure.

either way my point here is that they wanted to pull from all these influences and it was prominent enough during development that they sprinkle references to it throughout the show and yet their portrayal and treatment of asian characters in the show is so abysmal it just feels Bad™, you know? i cant really put it more eloquently than that, like its very take and no give with it.

it overall just puts a bad taste in my mouth, and its sad that it still affects people years later. like i mentioned in the tags of the post that started this discussion with that whole old trend of putting yourself into the bg of dp screenshots, i felt alienated by that. and its not the people who participated's fault obviously but most of the people i saw participating were white fans (going off of how they drew themselves) and it made me a bit mad that they were able to enjoy the style of the show in a more carefree manner than i ever could. i didnt want to ruin anyone's fun obviously, but a small part of me wanted to bring to light how i wasnt on equal ground with them in that situation.

[punkymaysnark]

Father's Day is such a rough time for the Warriors of Hope, even after adoption...

Nobody's in a worse mood than Masaru. All he can think about is how he spent the first ten years of his life in constant pain and fear. Trapped in a shitty dark house. Being forced to steal beer. Always hurting somewhere. There were days he was even denied food, or forced to sleep in the backyard. He touches the bandaid on his cheek. Under that bandaid is the cigarette burn he was given to scare him into never speaking the truth about his treatment. Just by touching it, he can still smell the smoke coming off that cigarette. Why should that...that bastard get his own day? He was rotting in prison where he belonged, but the damage to Masaru's psyche is done. He's sitting on his bed, clutching his stuffed toy, back facing the door. Yasuhiro tries to reach out, but his little buddy is unwilling to speak. Poor kid.

Finally, at the risk of being bitten, Yasuhiro gets the courage to walk right up to the boy, and land a hand on his shoulder. He winces, expecting Masaru to reflexively whirl around and bite. Instead, Masaru is slow, scowling at him. Hiro continues to smile. It's okay. I know he hurt you and he wouldn't stop hurting you and I'd like to have beat him up myself, but he's not here. I'm here. And I love you so much, so smile, okay? He strokes Masaru with his thumb.

Tears leak into Masaru's eyes. He whimpers. When it was the first weeks here, and Masaru was sick, cold, and utterly terrified, Hiro didn't give up trying to break through his trauma. This is the man who showed Masaru who a dad should be. He held Masaru in his lap and cuddled him for an entire evening. Masaru turns all the way around. Hiro understands the signal and scoops him.

Jataro feels empty. He never saw Dad. Dad must've walked out when he was born. Dad hated him. His whole life, his only exposure to fathers was hearing Masaru and Kotoko rant about their own. He doesn't really know what to do about it. Despondent, he finally settles in Kazuichi's lap while the Ultimate Mechanic is performing his weekly assignment. Kazuichi is nice. Kazuichi...he's kind of like a dad. Kazuichi won't walk out on him and leave him alone. Jataro remembers Kazuichi's look of sympathy when they met the first time, even if it was when Jataro still wore that hideous mask. Kazuichi smiles and gives the boy a light scratching on the cheek. It seems that, after such a rocky start, Jataro finally accepts him as a father figure. And he deserves one. He deserves all the loving family figures in the world. Kazuichi looks back proudly on how he kept showing the little guy affection and concern, and never gave up. His only regret is that he didn't figure out sooner how bad Jataro's abuse had been.

Kotoko is in a similar sour mood to Masaru, but she's better at swallowing it. Papa's in prison. She hopes he stays in prison until he's old and rotting. Speaking of rotting, did you know that rotting things are good for plants and bugs? Yeah. Maybe she'll plant some flowers with Kirumi today.

Papa can't hurt her...but the scars he left on her can. The way he forced her to earn money for the family. That ugly, smelly bed she was forced to stay on. That garish room with no escape. She's shaking. Papa's shadow is still clouding her vision. She still feels his hands on her shoulders sometimes, like right now. She still feels that loose clothing she was forced to wear. Helplessness. She gets the choking feeling of pure helplessness. Fortunately, Gonta notices her staring into space, trembling, mumbling under her breath. Gonta gentleman. When she starts to get a panic attack, Gonta knows to gently press a wet towel on Kotoko's forehead and keep it there. Gonta reminds her where she is. The little girl returns to reality. She is safe. She is truly loved here. Papa is in prison miles away from her. Patient and caring people like Gonta are here to protect her now, and they'll see her through the damage Papa did to her. She gives him an appreciative smile, works her hand into his, and they go outside together. Outside to find rotting things good for plants and bugs.

Nagisa lays on his desk. Father. No matter how safe and loved he is in the academy's walls, it doesn't change how badly he failed his father. And now Father's in prison, too. Why did Nagisa run away from him in the first place? He had such high expectations for Nagisa, only for his own son to ruin everything. With a resigned moan, he slumps over the spelling words he was reviewing and tries not to cry. Byakuya takes notice, and rolls his eyes. How many times has he told Nagisa about his posture? Not that the boy could help but think of his birth father today, he supposed. He gently grips Nagisa by the shoulders and pulls him up straight, fixing his scarf.

Byakuya knows that expression well. Nagisa is worrying about Byakuya giving him expectations again. No, Nagisa. He will never stoop to the level of your father. He'll be here for you, unlike that scum. Byakuya gestures to the cup of tea left for Nagisa. Relax. You're almost done with your work, and you're doing well. He sits next to the boy with his own weekly task in his lap. We'll finish our work together. Nagisa's little hair sprigs perk up, as do the corners of his lips. Byakuya doesn't smile, but Nagisa's learned to detect the approving warmness in the Affluent Prodigy's eyes.

Byakuya hadn't believed that he would want a child in his custody. But on that day, back then, when he realized he was seeing his own childhood self within the lonely, anxious Nagisa, everything fell into place.

Monaca is taken along with Makoto and Komaru to see their parents. She's scared. She tried to kill their parents. She doesn't know how to act for loving parents. She doesn't know if they'll give any love to her. Not that she deserves any. Hmph. Maybe she should try to kill them again. After all, Monaca's parents rejected her, why should she accept the Naegis' parents? During the ride, Makoto keeps giving her little gestures of affection. He's been so proud of her rehabilitation, but it was inevitable that she would slip back into her former personality on days like this. Komaru keeps gazing nervously at Monaca, what if she does snap and try something? She trusts her brother, but she also trusts her own past with Monaca. Monaca trusts her own past, too. Monaca remembers how much her papa beat down any happiness that came from his own half-daughter. Letting her do whatever she wanted just to keep her out of his hair. Hitting her. Insulting her.

But when they finally arrive at their parents' home, she finds herself swept up into the same family hug. Monaca knows these two adults are also nervous about meeting the girl who tried to destroy them, but the more they look at each other, somehow, the more relaxed they all become. After all, as their son assures, Monaca has been doing well in her rehab. Mr. Naegi asks her how she's been, if she wants anything to drink, if she can get to the bathroom all right. He pats her on the head and smiles at her. Monaca tries, but she can't feel much affection welling up in her heart. Her face is blank, which just makes him a little more nervous. Once in a while, she tries to open her mouth to speak, but...no. She just imagines everyone at the table glaring at her. Makoto is sitting next to her, speaking for her. The gentleness of his tone helps her relax, just slightly. Upon relaxing, jealousy boils inside her. He makes having a loving family look so easy.

[sillypiratelife]

Kuina is probably my favorite female character of One Piece, but that's because she represents just perfectly the experience of being a little girl that's into martial arts— and some other stuff.

Kuina would never be enough because she could not be man enough to inherit the dojo, according to her dad, but she was also not lady-like enough to be considered a "woman". To the eyes of other people (and what they make her believe), Kuina's dream marked her as an eternal outcast, someone who would never reach one shore or the other.

To Kuina, her body was a cage. Even if she had everything within her, her body would make her naturally weaker. Similar to being condemned to fight with a bad sword, a blade that would break. Being a child was safe. Little boys and little girls are equals. Growing up meant losing time, losing ground. Every year must have to be a burden to her, with the constant reminder that her time as the best was running out.

The fear and hatred of puberty, the horror of the way your body changes without your permission, the experience of girls who feel uncomfortable in her bodies because they don't want breasts, they don't want to be weaker once a month because their bodies are bleeding and their hormones are ruining everything— I've seen it all.

Worst even, the way people would stare at those bodies and lust for them. The trauma of being desirable. Now they think that they're entitled to your body, that they can disrespect you. You're a toy, an object, you're a woman so you're weak and fragile, you're a woman so give up, you're not in control of the situation anymore.

When Koushiro said that a woman could never be the best swordman in the world, there are soooo many things in between the lines. Why not?

As if it wasn't enough, the boys accused Kuina of being that much better than them because her dad was the leader of the dojo, so he must be teaching her in secret. Her merits were never hers, just the results of another man. "Ah, that girl can't be that good, she must be getting help, receiving special treatment, getting extra training, etc". It's infuriating and Kuina shows it. They disrespect her like it's nothing, like it's natural. Her own dad allows it and participates in that.

Before Zoro, Kuina had no one to tell her that her skills were only hers. Her body, her heritage, not of that mattered. She was the rightful winner of their matches, at least so far.

When Zoro cries out of frustration and Kuina asks him if he even knows why she should be the one crying for it? Life changing moment. Zoro got the praise and loyalty of the dojo boys, the admiration of the older people training there, he was even the special boy of her dad— Koushiro let Zoro clown around with multiple swords and watch Kuina beat his ass, but it'd never matter.

Zoro wouldn't be betrayed by his own body, his own family, his own dojo and his own hometown. He was an outsider accepted by the community, their pride even. He came out of nowhere and they gave him everything she wanted and both of them deserved. It's just that it wasn't a fair fight: Zoro was a boy and Kuina was a girl. She'd always have to fight harder even if she was better.

For me, I really think that only Zoro could carry Wado Ichimonji with him. He was the only one who respected Kuina as a person and a rival, not seeing what others saw in her. Zoro honored all their fights, never tried to discredit her, because even when Koushiro tried to give Zoro an excuse "you forgot that she's a little older than you", Zoro brushed it away. No, he could beat grown-ups. That was not it.

Kuina was better than him. Period.

The fact that she died in such an accident and the way Koushiro said "humans are fragile things"... It is just so amazing. What Kuina feared the most: all her potential, wasted. When she was finally ready to go after what she wanted, she fell down the stairs and died. Simple. The promise Zoro and Kuina made was wasted too. Now Zoro had all the time in the world and Kuina had no time at all. She was always against fate and Zoro rode with it.

I still think about how Zoro plans to make it all worth something: if she can rightfully fight for the title, then he won't let anyone have it but him. If Kuina was able to beat 2001 times the boy who would become the best swordman in the world, then no one could insult him ever again. And if he won that title with her sword, then he'd elevate both their names. If he could fulfill his promise to her, then that night would hold its meaning.

I love Kuina soooo freaking much and I love how much Zoro values her, even to this day.

[justagalwhowrites]

Lavender - Ch. 46

You and Joel find out the Fireflies' plan for Ellie. A continuation of Lavender Ch. 1-45 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Canon-typical violence. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ only

Length: 5.3K

Your whole body hurt. It reminded you of when you got thrown from your neighbor’s horse and broke your arm when you were a child. Everything was sore and raw and everything felt ever so slightly wrong. Like something central to you was misaligned. 

“Take it easy,” there was a man’s voice, one you didn’t recognize. You ignored him, shooting up and looking around. He kept his distance, his hands up in front of him. He kept his voice low, gentle. “You’re OK, not going to hurt you…” 

“Where…” you looked around. 

“You’re at a hospital in Salt Lake City,” he said, hands still up. “With the Fireflies. We found you a few hours ago. Sorry for the cold welcome but I don’t think they were expecting you to actually show up…” 

Your head spun a bit as you shifted. You were on a gurney, the room dim. 

“Joel?” You asked. “Ellie? Are they…” 

“They’re fine,” he said, lowering his hands slowly. “Joel is still out but he should be fine, we’re getting things prepped for Ellie right now so we can start our work.” 

You nodded and rubbed your temples. 

“Looks like you’ve been through the mill,” he smiled a little and sat next to you. 

“Yeah, just a bit,” you laughed a little. “It’s a hell scape out there…” 

“Marlene said that you were a doctor?” He asked, looking you over. “That you’d been doing research in Boston about a possible cure?” 

“Well, not a cure,” you said, looking around the room again and spotting your bag in a corner. You slid down from the gurney and went to get it, needing to hold onto the wall for a moment to keep from falling over. But you got the bag and went back to the gurney, setting the bag on top of it. You dug all the way to the bottom, finding your piles of notes. “But a treatment. Something that can be administered immediately after a bite that will slow the progression of cordyceps. If you can amputate the effected area or surgically remove the cordyceps from the tissue, it never reaches the brain and takes over. It’s not perfect and I haven’t done any kind of live trials but it could mean that a bite is no longer a death sentence…” 

“This is incredible,” he was flipping through pages of your work, skimming over it. “Just imagine, with the information we can get from Ellie combined with your research…” 

“I take it you’re a doctor then?” You asked, putting your hands in the back pockets of your jeans. 

“Oh, of course, I’m sorry,” he shook his head and smiled before holding his hand out. “I’m Dr. Jerry Anderson, I’ve been leading the Fireflies’ research into finding a cure. Marlene mentioned you to me when she made it out here. She’d hoped you’d show up at some point but gave up hope about a month back. She was pretty upset, said she thought your work showed a lot of promise…” 

“Well glad to know someone missed something about me,” you said wryly. He laughed a little. “So I guess we’ll be working together then? Or I can at least give you my notes, I know our plan isn’t to stay here forever but I obviously want to help…” 

“Of course, of course,” he nodded, going back to your notes. “We are talking about the single most important medical achievement of mankind here, I’d hope you’d want to be involved!” 

You laughed once and nodded, looking over his arm at your work. 

“I just don’t want to put too much strain on Joel and Ellie,” you said. “They’ve been through a lot. Especially her. There’s a place we want to make it back to, settle for a while. She deserves that, all she’s known is the QZ, she deserves better than that…” 

His jaw clenched for a moment before he spoke again. 

“I have a daughter, not much older than Ellie,” he said, looking down at you. “I’d do anything to make life better for her. But it’s… hard. Knowing that they’re going through something awful, especially when it isn’t their fault.” 

“It really is,” you sighed. “That girl went through so much just to get here. More than any one person should ever go through… Of course a cure is important, it’s the most important thing we could do and I know she wants to do whatever she can for it but I want her to have a chance to be a kid. That’s important, too. Maybe not to the whole world but it’s important.” 

“At least you can know that, whatever happens, it was done to save everyone,” he said. “It’s worth some sacrifice if it saves everyone.” 

There was a knock at the door and a nurse leaned her head in. 

“Doctor?” She said. “We’re about ready for you…” 

“Thanks,” he smiled tightly at her before turning back to you, handing you your notes. “We can talk more later, see if we can find the best applications for your research with what I think we have in Ellie…” 

“Are you running tests on her?” You frowned. “Can I see her?” 

“Not the best time,” he said. “We’re trying to keep the environment contained at the moment. We can talk later…” 

“I’d really like to see her though,” you cut him off. “She’s got to be scared, she’s never been in a place like this and…” 

“Just…” he paused. “Just think about what all we’re going to be able to do with what we’re making here. How many people we’re going to save. We’ll talk in a bit, OK?” 

“But…” You protested, trying to follow him, but he stepped around a large, armed man on his way out and the man pressed you back into the room. You stepped back from him on instinct, his tall, broad body blocking you from getting to the door. He had a rifle in his hands. You swallowed, looking up at him. “I just have a few questions…” 

You went to duck around him but he cut you off. 

“Dr. Anderson wants you to stay here,” he said gruffly. “So you stay here.” 

You frowned. 

“Are you holding me prisoner?” You asked. 

“No,” he said. “Just keeping you here for now.” 

“Sounds an awful lot like holding me prisoner,” you said. The man shrugged, blocking your way to the door. “I’m not going to cause any trouble, I just want…” 

“You can stay put for a bit while the doc does his work,” he replied. You narrowed your eyes at him. 

“OK so if I can’t see Ellie can I at least see Joel?” You planted yourself in front of him, your arms crossed. “The man I came in with, just take me to see him. I just want to make sure he’s alright…” 

“You stay. Put.” The man said, voice sharp. You stared him down for another moment before you went to look out the window. Not that you were seriously considering jumping out of it if you were low to the ground but it was tempting. 

Something about this whole situation had set you on edge. Your chest was tight, your stomach in knots. Something felt wrong. You didn’t trust it. You weren’t sure what you didn’t trust yet - if it was Dr. Anderson, if it was being away from Joel and Ellie, if it was just the whole situation in general - but you didn’t trust something. The feeling of something being out of alignment grew more insistent.  

You were pacing, one arm across your stomach with the other propped against it, hand to your mouth, when you heard two sharp pops. The sound made you jump, like gunshots did in the QZ. You frowned and looked toward the man at the door. 

“Did you…” you began but he cut you off. 

“Quiet,” he snapped, looking through the window in the door to your room. His radio crackled to life. 

“Shots fired!” 

“What’s going on?” You asked, eyes wide. 

“Probably fuckin’ raiders,” he said, his grip tightening on his gun. “Stay…” 

“I need to get to Ellie and Joel,” you said quickly, trying to push your way past him but he shoved you back. “Please, I need to get to them, Dr. Anderson said Joel was unconscious and Ellie…” 

“Leave it!” He snapped over his shoulder. “If you get yourself fuckin’ killed you’re of no use to anyone so let me handle it…” 

“Joel was still unconscious!” You tried to run past him but he grabbed you and threw you back into the gurney, sharp pain radiating out from your ribs. You had started crying but you knew it because of the blow. “Please, they’re just going to kill him he won’t even have a chance!” 

There were more gunshots and he glared at you as you pulled yourself to your feet. 

“I was told to keep you in this room and keep you alive,” he snapped, turning the gun on you and pointing it at your thigh. “I will fuckin’ shoot you if you don’t calm down and stay put!” 

More gunshots. They sounded closer now. 

“Please,” you begged again, trying to make yourself stop crying. “I’m sure they got Ellie out but…” 

“The fuck you think you’re gonna do?” He snapped. His eyes were wide, scared. “You’re not gonna last two minutes out there if we’re overrun by fuckin’ raiders! So get out of sight and shut the fuck up before you get us both killed…” 

There were a few more loud pops, so loud that they made you flinch. Some of them must have made it to your level. The man glared at you and jerked his head toward the corner of the room that was against the same wall as the door, where you’d be harder to see if someone just glanced inside. You obeyed, watching him closely. The man clenched his jaw for a moment and went to the holster at his belt and pulled out a pistol. He handed it to you. 

“It’s a full clip,” he said quietly. “If you need it.” 

You just nodded and aimed the gun at the ground, pressing yourself back against the wall. You wiped your eyes and breathed deep. You had to focus. Had to be ready to defend yourself, you couldn’t help Joel and Ellie if you were dead. 

The man was watching through the pane of glass in the door as you tried to calm yourself down. Your thoughts were like a drumbeat, get to Joel get to Joel get to Joel. You had to reach him, had to save him, you and Ellie needed him. It was desperate and gnawing and grasping and you had to get to him. 

The man tensed for a second. 

“Stay put,” he breathed, opening the door slowly, moving almost silently. You closed your eyes for a moment and got ready to move, to try to find Joel, when there were two almost deafening pops. So loud you knew they had to be right outside your door. You jumped and tightened your grip on your pistol, raising it, getting ready to shoot the next person through the door if they were a raider. Your heart was pounding against your ribs, so hard you were certain that someone standing outside would hear it. 

The door opened slowly and you aimed your weapon for a second before you dropped it. 

“Joel!” 

***

You weren’t next to Joel when he woke up. 

It felt like you should have been, though. 

In fairness, it always felt like you should be next to him when he woke up. That had been one of the nice things about traveling with you the last few months, waking up and having you within arm’s reach. He’d started every goddamn day of his life from the time he first touched you feeling disoriented if you weren’t there when he woke up. He’d reach for you, searching, like there was a part of him that was missing. It happened when he thought you were dead, in the glorious few seconds every day where he forgot about the outbreak and didn’t know that you and Sarah were gone. It happened in the QZ, even when Tess was there because she wasn’t you. It happened on the nights on the road where you had second watch and he woke up while you were out of sight and there was the thrill of fear, a spark of wrongness at you being somewhere else. 

But he needed to find you now. Something had happened, he could feel that in his body. He needed to find you and Ellie and make sure everything was OK. 

“You actually fucking did it.” 

The voice was familiar, it took him a second to place it, for his eyes to focus. 

“I thought you were long dead…” 

“Marlene?” He sat up and saw her in the doorway of a hospital room. 

“You are the last person on the planet I’d want to be in debt to,” she hook her head, her small smile dark. “It couldn’t have been Tess who made it this far with them, had to be you?” 

“I’d have it be the other way if I could,” he said, looking around. “Where are they?” 

“They’re fine,” she said. “Doc is awake and has met with our doctor. She’s a little banged up but fine. Ellie doesn’t have a scratch, was mostly worried about the two of you…” 

“Can I see her?” Joel asked, still blinking some disorientation out of his head. 

“How’d you do it?” Marlene asked, ignoring his question. “How’d you make it this far? I had a whole fucking team of guys whose whole job was keeping me alive. We had equipment - trucks, guns - and I still barely made it here. And then there’s you three…” 

“They were determined,” Joel replied. “Did a lot to make it this far…” 

“They’d be dead without you,” she cut him off. “Before you even made it out of Boston, they’d have been dead. Ellie’s a kid, Doc wouldn’t hurt a fly even if it meant saving her own damn life…” 

“I need to see them,” Joel’s chest was tight. He didn’t like this. Something was off, wrong. 

“You can’t,” Marlene said, her voice calm and even. “I’m sorry, Joel.” 

“The fuck you mean I can’t?” He got to his feet. An armed man at Marlene’s side started moving for him but she put an arm out, stopping him. “I need to see them right now, Marlene!” 

“I mean,” she said, still calm. “Doc is getting up to speed on what our doctor’s been doing and Ellie is getting ready for surgery.” 

Joel leaned back against the gurney. You already working made sense, he knew you wanted to get in and get out of here quickly but Ellie…

“Surgery?” He frowned. “You said she was fine, not a scratch, why’s she need surgery? I thought you just needed her blood and shit, to run tests, if she’s fine why’s she need surgery?” 

“Our doctor thinks Ellie has had cordyceps with her since birth,” Marlene said. “They produce a kind of chemical messenger…” 

“So get it from her fuckin’ blood,” Joel snapped. 

“He needs the cordyceps that have grown inside her,” she said. “With them he’s going to produce that chemical messenger, one that makes normal cordyceps recognize Ellie as one of their own, and we can give it to everyone. It’s a cure, Joel. It’s a fucking cure.” 

It was like his brain was a scratched CD for a moment, stuck on one thing she said. 

“Cordyceps grows inside the brain,” he looked at Marlene.

He had to be missing something. That couldn’t be right. Marlene might be an asshole but she wouldn’t murder a child. She wouldn’t hurt Ellie. 

“It does,” she nodded. 

“No,” he shook his head. “No, you…” 

“She doesn’t know,” Marlene said. “She’s not afraid, she’ll be unconscious so she won’t feel any pain…” 

Joel’s head spun. It couldn’t be right. They couldn’t want to take her, not like that, not… 

“No,” he snapped, pushing himself off the gurney and going for Marlene. “No, you take me to her! You take me to her right now!” 

She didn’t stop her guard from intervening that time, the butt of his gun slamming into Joel’s stomach, a second blow hitting his head, sending him to the ground. 

“Can’t do that, Joel.” 

“You really think she’s gonna help you if you kill her?” He asked. “Think she’ll do a damn thing to make that cure happen if it comes at the cost of Ellie’s life? You’re not gonna have shit…” 

“Doc won’t let Ellie die in vain,” Marlene said. “She’ll do it. She’ll make sure it works.” 

“Please,” he panted. “Please…” 

“I’m sorry, Joel,” she said quietly. “I truly am, you have no idea how sorry I am.” 

“Then don’t fuckin’ do it!” He said, getting to his feet. “You can’t…” 

“I’ve known her her whole life,” she said. “I was there when she was born, I was there when her mother died after I promised I would protect her daughter. But there is no other choice here, Joel. This is what it takes to get the world back. I have no other choice.” 

He was back in 2003. It was dark, chaotic. He had to get to his daughter and he had to get to you. He had to protect you both, he had to, there was no other option. He had no other choice. 

He looked up at Marlene. 

“I do.” 

She sighed. 

“Get him out of here,” she said to her guard. “Out of town. He acts up, shoot him.” She pulled a knife - Ellie’s knife - and handed it to them. “Give him that.” 

“What about Doc?” He asked. “What about…” 

“Thought you hated her,” she said. “So don’t worry about it. We’ll take care of her. We need what’s in her head, remember? She’ll be safe with us.” 

She left the room ahead of Joel, before the men shoved him forward. She paused and looked back at him. 

“I am sorry, Joel,” she said. “Take care of yourself.” 

They pushed him toward the stairwell and he let them. It was like an out of body experience, like he wasn’t in control. The need to get to Ellie and get to you had taken over. Nothing else mattered, nothing. Not his body or mind, not the lives of the people in this hospital, not hope for humanity, none of it. Get to his daughter, get to you. 

“Keep goin’,” the voice behind him was sharp. Joel had forgotten he was there. He obeyed, going for the stairs. He paused, at a sign indicating the floors. He needed to go up. The men with Joel shoved him down. He let them. 

He needed a gun. The Fireflies weren’t going to just let either of you go. He was going to have to take you from them. He was OK with that. It was worth it. It was worth a whole hell of a lot more than that. 

He stopped on a landing. He didn’t have time to keep going along with them. He had to do this now, he had to get to his daughter and get to you now. 

“The fuck did I say?” The man snapped, shoving Joel into the wall. “Keep. Goin’.” 

He shoved him again and Joel moved fast, whipping around and ripping the gun from his hands. He shot the first man and shoved the other back onto the stairs. The man’s hands went up. 

“Where’s the girl?” Joel asked. He didn’t recognize his own voice. 

“Fuck you,” he spat. 

“I don’t have time for this.” 

Joel shot him, too. He didn’t feel anything when he did it, not the pain he once felt when killing another human being, not relief at taking action, not the push of adrenaline. He was beyond that now, outside what feeling could touch. 

He moved on. 

Up the stairs, next floor, where he heard people moving. He had to make sure there was no one who could interfere, no one who could stop him, not this time. He was not going to let them take you from him. Not you, not his daughter. 

He took another gun and a clip from someone who was dead. They were dead because Joel had killed him. The fact barely registered. The fact that he’d killed at least a dozen people so far barely registered. 

He moved to the next floor. 

The Fireflies were shooting at him but he couldn’t bring himself to care. He’d only care if they killed him before he could get to his daughter and get to you. As long as he got you both out, they could have him. Get to her, get to you. 

Next floor. 

It was quieter there. He tried to think of how many Fireflies would be here and how many he’d already killed. The last few minutes were a fog. Two dozen dead, at least, he thought. Probably more. There may not be any more left to stop him. 

There were gunshots from the side of him, shattering a pane of glass near his head. Joel turned and shot, dropping the man. Joel went over to him, the man writhing on the ground, gasping for breath. He went to shoot the man again but the gun didn’t fire. Out of ammo. He pulled out the knife - Ellie’s knife - and slit his throat before taking the man’s gun and ammunition. 

Joel looked up. There was a door, one the man was close enough to that he might have been protecting it. It could be you or Ellie. 

He opened it, slowly. 

“Joel!” 

You were against him in a second and he could suddenly feel again, everything becoming bright and harsh. Everything except for you, your warm, soft body holding him to the earth. He could smell your hair and your skin and feel your heart beat against his chest as you clung to him. 

“You’re alive,” you buried your face in his chest and his arms went around you. It was instinctual. “Joel, there are raiders, in the hospital…” 

“No raiders,” he released you and you stepped back from him, frowning up at him. “We have to get Ellie.” 

“What?” You frowned. “I don’t… haven’t you heard the shooting? There’s…” 

“We need to get Ellie,” he said. “Do you know where she is?” 

“No,” you shook your head. “No, they just said they were taking her for tests, they wouldn’t let me see her yet. I’m sure they got her out of here when the shooting started… Joel, what do you mean there aren’t raiders? Who’s…” 

“They’re not running tests,” he said, getting a better grip on his gun. “We have to get her.” 

“What?” Your eyes searched his and he saw himself reflected in you for a moment. The shell he’d become if he failed this time. He saw the brief moment of horror and then understanding, he saw that you knew. He cut you off before you had the chance to ask.

“She’s in surgery,” he said. “They need to take the cordyceps from her, they…” 

“That would kill her,” you stepped back from him, your eyes wide. “Joel, that would kill her, that…” 

“Marlene said she didn’t have another choice,” he said. “We do. We have to get our girl, Baby, we have to get her…” 

You picked up a gun from the ground and put it low in front of you. 

“She’ll probably be in pediatrics,” you said, looking up at Joel. “She’s small, they’re going to want to use the tools that are there. They’ll stick to the surgical wing, no reason to reinvent the wheel and take the procedure anywhere else…” 

Joel nodded once. 

“Stay behind me,” he said. 

He led you past the man he’d killed just outside your door, the linoleum slick with his blood. There was a twinge of something almost like pity in Joel now, seeing the man’s body. He pressed on. Down past the faded and dirty murals of animals, past the body of another man he’d killed to get this far. 

“There,” you nodded down a hall. “It’ll probably be there…” 

Joel wordlessly led the way, peering into rooms until he saw her, through a window in a door. Her small, fragile body on the table, nurses standing next to her, a man in a scrub cap with a scalpel. He opened the door, gun raised. 

“Unhook her,” he said, his voice deadly calm. The women jumped. The man stared at him. 

“Dr. Anderson,” you said softly. “You can’t do this. Please. This will kill her…” 

“It’s the cure,” he looked at you, his eyes darting back to Joel before settling on you. “It’s worth the sacrifice, it’s for all of humanity, it’s…” 

“Unhook her,” Joel said again, stepping closer. “Now.” 

“I’m sorry,” the man said, holding the scalpel up. “I’m sorry, but you can’t take her.” 

Joel aimed for his head, his finger going for the trigger, but you jumped in front of him, your gun held low. 

“Baby,” he said sharply. “Move.” 

“No,” you said. “No, you can’t kill him, you don’t have to kill him. He has a daughter, Joel. He’s a father, just like you. Imagine what would have happened to Sarah if you died. Imagine what would happen to Ellie. You don’t have to kill him…” 

He reached out to sweep you out of the way but you turned before he could get to you, shooting the man in the leg with a small cry. The doctor screamed, dropping the scalpel and collapsing to the ground. Joel lowered his gun. Your eyes were wide, pleading. 

“Get Ellie,” you said. “Joel…” 

He turned the gun on the nurses as you put your pistol in the waistband of your jeans, starting to put a tourniquet around the doctor’s leg. 

“Unhook her,” he said, gun up again. The nurses scrambled to obey this time, pulling a face mask from her and an IV from her arm. She started bleeding where the needle had been and he nodded at it. “Make that stop. Quick.” 

They quickly taped a patch of gauze over the hole in her arm and stepped back again. Joel kept his eyes on them as he slung the strap of his gun over his shoulder and lifted Ellie’s small body, gently, into his arms. 

“You’re OK Baby Girl,” he said quietly. Her head lolled to his shoulder. He could feel her breathing. “You’re OK.” 

You got up from the ground beside the doctor, kicking the scalpel across the room and drawing your gun again. 

“I’m sorry,” you said, looking around as you backed toward Joel. “I’m sorry it had to be this way but you can’t… We can’t… I’m sorry.” 

You stuck close to Joel as he went for an elevator which, mercifully, still worked. You pushed the button labeled garage. 

“I hope they have trucks,” you said, your grip on the gun tight. 

“Should have let me kill him,” he said. 

You shook your head. 

“I’ll kill to keep you and her safe but I’m not killing if I don’t have to,” you said, your voice firm. “We didn’t have to kill him, he wasn’t armed, there’s nothing he could really do…” 

“He was going to kill her.” 

You took a deep breath. 

“I know,” you said. “I know.” 

The elevator chimed and you went into the garage first, your gun up, ready to shoot. For half a moment, Joel thought it was over. That he could take a car and be done, that there was no one down here and that the worst was over. 

But it wasn’t. Of course it wasn’t. 

“You can’t protect her forever, Joel,” Marlene said. You both turned to face her, her gun up as she prowled closer. “Not in a world like this one. It’s impossible. No one is safe here, that’s the point.” 

“It’s not your choice to make,” he said, holding Ellie’s limp body closer. 

“It’s not yours either,” she said, gun still raised. “It’s hers.” 

“She’s 14 years old, Marlene,” you put yourself between her and Joel, your gun up. He resisted the urge to put you behind him, holding tightly to Ellie. Keeping her safe, that’s what mattered. “It can’t be up to her, she doesn’t understand…” 

“She’s a smart girl, Doc,” she cut you off. “This is what she’d want and you know it.” 

“She’s a child!” Your grip tightened on your gun. “She’s too young to decide something like this! So we’re deciding for her…” 

“She’s going to get torn apart,” Marlene was ignoring you now, looking over you to him. “Or kidnapped by raiders, shot by some asshole. Is that what you want for her, Joel? Do you think that she’ll forgive you if she finds out that you cursed her to live in this world? With these risks?” 

“Rather her be alive to hate me,” he said, looking down at Ellie, his watch reflecting the florescent light of the parking garage in a broken, fractured pattern onto a nearby concrete post. “Don’t care about the rest.” 

“Let us go, Marlene,” you said, backing up toward Joel. “I don’t want to kill you…” 

“We both know you’re not the dangerous one,” Marlene looked at you. “Just put the gun down, we can discuss this. We both know you’re not a killer.” 

You planted your feet.

“For them I am.” 

Marlene realized what was happening half a second before you pulled the trigger and fired just before you did. Time slowed and Joel watched, helpless, as the bullet hit you. He was helpless, just like that night in Texas. He couldn’t do anything but watch you hurt. You stumbled back and fell, keeping your gun clutched in your hand. 

“Go!” You yelled at him, sitting up on your elbow, raising the gun and pointing it at Marlene again. He realized she was on the ground, too, her gun dropped where she’d been standing. “Get Ellie to one of the cars. I’ll be fine, get Ellie to a car…” 

You were panting for breath now and he ran to obey, finding one of the SUVs that the Fireflies were charging a battery on and setting Ellie gently in the back seat. He made sure she was still breathing before going back for you. 

Marlene was struggling to breathe, trying to get back to her gun. Joel met your eyes for a moment and you gave him a nod, letting your weapon fall as you hissed in pain. He picked up Marlene’s gun, standing over her. 

“Please,” she panted, her hands clutched over her stomach where you’d shot her. “Please, don’t do this…” 

“Can’t leave you alive,” he said. “You’d just come after them. You’d just kill them. Can’t let you live.” 

He shot her in the head and her body went limp. He tucked the gun into the waistband of his pants and knelt beside you, one hand going to cup your cheek, the other around your ribs, holding you up. 

“You’re OK Baby,” he said quickly. “You’re OK, it’s going to be OK…” 

“It’s not bad,” you winced, nodding down at your leg. He adjusted your shirt. There was an entrance wound on the side of your thigh. “It missed the vital stuff and it went clean through, just need to stop the bleeding…” 

“You did good, Baby,” he kissed your forehead. “You did so good.” 

You closed your eyes and nodded. 

“Let’s get the fuck out of here,” you said. 

He lifted you gently into his arms and put you in the passenger seat of the SUV before he unhooked the battery, closed the hood and left the hospital behind.

A/N: Alright folks, this is it. We've got three chapters of this left to go.

I know, I know, I can't believe it either! I hope you enjoyed Joel losing his mind a bit in this chapter and that you'll enjoy what the future holds for our little trio.

Right now, I'm planning to publish again on Tuesday, 7/18; Thursday, 7/20, and close out the series on Friday, 7/21.

I'm going to close the taglist for now since we're so close to the end of this and it's been a bit shoddy anyway (Tumblr just does NOT let me tag some folks and I don't know why!) But thank you to everyone who has shared and commented and liked and followed this story. It sincerely means the world.

Thank you for being here! Love you all!

Taglist: @paleidiot@ayamenimthiriel@ginger-swag-rapunzel@drewharrisonwriter@flugazi @pedropascalsbbg@taoyuji@starstruckmusiciansartghost@splendsay@bigboiseason123@jpbplvr @ashleyandring @mrsyixingunicorn10@sloanexx@ninaminaromina @lady-bellyn @hufflepuffriver @sarap-77 @storyarcscribe @mellymbee @jasminedragoon @lemonmeli @reds-ramblings@arizonadaydreamer@mumma-moonchild@blackroseguzzi@candypeaches16@kittenlittle24@wrappedinfiction@oatmeaiboy@pedritosdarling@winchestergypsy90@imnotdatboii @lalalalemonade11 @maknimuk1@mrsdarcyinlovewithbuckybarnes@pedrosaidsheispunk@commanderawkward@n7cje@elliesgirlll@tsunamistorm123@spookyxsam@leeeesahhh @anoverwhelmingdin @untamedheart81 @pedropascalfan221 @pedr0swh0r3 @pedrobae@fifia-writes@fatima-marisa @acf2023 @1soff@encephalitiskat @ashleymsnodgrass @karlinspace

[lizzie-queenofmeigas]

My Opinions Of TVDU In 2024

(They really haven't changed all that much but I feel like sharing)

–I loveeee Delena. Yep, I love this ship with all my heart and I'm not afraid to say it.

–I loveee Damon, probably another problematic opinion but I don't care.

–I don't like Caroline. There, I said it. She is just the kind of person that would irritate the shit out of me. Honestly, until season 8 I couldn't handle her scenes.

–Bonenzo is the best. Loveee it. They deserved better and I personally want to stab Julie Plec for how they ended.

–Bonnie deserved better. This is an universal truth.

–I hate Tyler, but I recognise that he was right to hate Klaus and right to be mad at Caroline for sleeping with him. Revenge on Klaus was kind of dumb, but understandable. He was right to want him dead.

–Klaus is my beloved, always going to be and I'm not even sorry.

–Marcel is a Mikaelson!!! Marcel is Klaus's son and his treatment is another reason for me to feel murderous to the writers of the shows.

–I don't like Kol. Yeah, he was right in many things, but he came across as somehow self-righteous and believed himself better than his family. Like bro, you aren't.

–Finn deserved better. I honestly still wonder if Finn knew about Klaus's real father, 'cause if he did Klaus would have a valid reason to hate him. I am saying this because in The Originals season 2 episode 3 we have flashbacks of young Klaus and the necklace Esther gave him. If I remember correctly Finn was always in the background and even retrieved the necklace when Klaus lost it. Given that Finn remembered Freya and what happened to her, it wouldn't be far fetched to think he knew who Klaus's real father was and hid it as well. That being said, he is a victim of his parents as well and deserved better.

–I hate Elijah. He just gives me the wrong vibes.

–Marcel and Rebekah made sense and I ship it. The Mikaelson family is insane with their romantic relationships, so they just sort of clicked.

–Kol should have taken the cure instead of Rebekah. Bekah could just adopt, but what is going to happen with Kol when Davina dies? Nothing good. Plus, he loved being a witch.

–Hayley and Klaus and Klaus and Cami made way more sense than Haylijah and Klaroline. Honestly and throuple with Klaus and the two women who call him out on his shit the most would have been chef kiss. Hope deserved two moms.

–Every Klaus ship made more sense than Caroline. Bonnie? Bennett witch and he likes witches. Aurora? First female vampire (other than Bex) and met him when he wasn't as he is now. Elena? Has Tatia's face, and I think if Klaus just tried to befriend her and explain why he needed to break his curse she would've helped. Camille? Her mind, she clocked him the moment they met, not to mention the O'Connell legacy. Genevieve? Powerful Witch. Hayley? Baby mama, werewolf princess and hybrid, not to mention they are similar. Stefan? The ripper days gave off fruity vibes. Damon? I love their scenes together, they have a similar vibe to them. Rebekah? He is literally killing her boyfriends left and right. Elijah? The codependency is strong here, Elijah's girlfriends have a higher mortality rate than Rebekah's boyfriends. Katherine? Tatia's face, also they are similar. Greta? Their few interactions in season 2 pointed to a thing going on.

–Elena is overhated. Baby has the biggest survivor's guilt in the universe and still she soldiers on. I hate when people said she was less compassionate as a vampire, I honestly thought she was the same. Like, she controls her hunger to become a doctor. She is too good for this world.

–Enzo should have been introduced sooner, Bonnie and him should have gotten together sooner.

–They should have explored Damon's trauma with Augustine more, and the fact that he always disregards his emotions.

–Klaus wolf side should have been explored!!!

–Unpopular opinion, but not everything Katherine did was necessary for her to survive. She could have easily contented herself with one Salvatore brother, but she had to go after both.

–Davina and Klaus needed more scenes together. I mean, that's her adoptive grandpa!

–Lily was awful, Damon was in his rights to not forgive her.

–I liked Valerie, and I liked her with Stefan.

–They should have explained more about Klaus ability to have children, 'cause that was weird. I loved it, but weird.

–Alaric should have died and the twins should have been raised by someone else.

–Matt lived too long.

–Jeremy and Damon were kind of funny.

–Bamon was really great.

–They should have addressed the fact that growing up Damon was the only one there for Stefan. We saw that in the flashbacks but they should have said it more.

–Damon purpose in life was to live for those he loved. My take on him.

–Damon was pretty humanity-full vampire until after Augustine when he turned off his humanity. But, five years of torture in the hands of humans would do that to a guy.

–The witches opinion on vampires were ridiculous. This species has been around for over a millennium, they are pretty assimilated in the magic ecosystem. I think their extinction would actually do more damage than their existence.

–Mikael and Esther deserved more pain.

–I think Dahlia only tried to negotiate with Klaus not only because he was Hope's father but because he was the only one who wasn't Mikael's son.

–Vampire/Supernatural politics are actually so interesting.

–Lexi was too hyped. And I don't get what she had against Damon in the forties.

–Legacies doesn't exist.

That's all. For now.

[surgepricing]

Could I ask what you think about Raven Branwen as a character and her role in the story?

Raven Branwen was an ideal counterpart antagonist to Yang Xiao Long and should have gone on to be her most direct villain rather than Adam filling that role.

A lot of people get too caught up in discourse about RWBY and end up twisting one of the few things it did reasonably well, which was its treatment of Yang's biological parents, Taiyang (flawed individual who dealt with a lot of shit and as a result fell down on parenting, but seems to have healed and stepped up since) and Raven (cowardly and self-serving bandit who left people who loved her rather than step up at all). I do not think Taiyang is a bad parent, I think Raven most definitely is, and I think Raven was the perfect person to contrast the core of Yang's character (inner strength that drives a person to be loving and warm).

The only real flaw in their confrontation in Volume 5 is that it happens far too soon; Raven deserved to blossom into a complete antagonist and have more than one skirmish with Yang as the person who defies everything she stands for, who indirectly made her who she is.

I have this problem a lot with RWBY stans and even RWBY antis; they do not seem to understand that the point of female characters is not to be good or to be redeemed; the point of female characters is the exact same as the point of male ones, which in the end is just to be interesting. Cinder did not need a tragic backstory and Emerald did not need redemption; both of these aspects of the show were forced, ill-timed, and generally unnecessary as these two characters were more entertaining as straightforward villainesses.

The same goes for Raven. Her cold and shrewd nature with her self-serving personality makes her a much more enjoyable antagonist to watch than the likes of other villains like Jacques or Tyrian or, god forbid, Hazel. Adam may have chopped off Yang's arm, but Adam isn't the one who gave Yang attachment issues, he just worsened them. Raven is the one who had the chance to be a part of a functioning family and had people who needed her, and threw it away. This point is used to contrast her against Qrow many times, so I know the show writers see the general shape of it and could've used it better. Raven is the one who casts a shadow over Yang in the present day and should have continued to hang over her head as an enemy she would one day need to clash against a final time.

Let women be evil please and thank you.

[starryknight-dragonarts]

Full name: Baroness Captain Kaida Cinnamon Samedi LaCroix the Pirate Empress, Deadly Sin of Greed, Daughter of the Death Loa

Generations ago there was an age of legendary Seafarers, Pirates, and Dreamers who's feats were like the stuff of fantasy. They set out into the vast unknown to seek their fortune and make their mark on the world. They left a ripple through the sea that would be felt long after they were gone and spoken of in tales across the world, but time passed, the unknown became known, the uncharted became charted, and pokemon became more cynical and concerned with the material. Dreams are but Fantasies of the night, and rather than being the symbols of freedom they once were, pirates became more infamous as ruthless cutthroats. Those who still clung to the older ways were seen as a relic of a bygone era...Then the self proclaimed Empress showed up, and took the Sea by Storm!

Kaida was born a Salandit slave to one of the most cruel Salazzle Queens on the Volcano; Bellinora Eleaika the Demon Queen, who infamously murdered her mother and sisters to take the throne. Kaida was not born biologically female, but Kaida knew very early on that she was not a boy Salandit, she described it as "having a Girl Soul" and gave herself the name Kaida "Little Dragon". Her mother however demeaned and dismissed her entirely and decided to give her the much less impressive nickname; "Kindling". She believed that Kaida's ideas were all simply some delusional ploy to get better treatment and dangerous to her authority because if she started treating one slave like a pokemon worth caring about then every Salandit would want the same.

At 7 years old Kaida had a plan to finally make her mother acknowledge her as a daughter, he had heard that there was an Oranguru Wizard named Osgarius Zoroaster somewhere on the island who could grant anyone their deepest desires if they were brave enough to make it to him and fulfil his tasks. Kaida thought she was pretty brave, but more so she was determined and stubborn, She would never give up until she got what she wanted! She traveled it to Osgarius's tower and told him her desire to be a fully a girl. Osgarius seemed to be a benevolent man who heard her out and agreed to help if she did something for him first to prove she deserved it...he asked her to steal the Totem of Lush Jungle a sacred artifact of the original royal tribes that granted their house power and authority over the Jungle. Kaida stole and brought back the Totem expecting Osgarius to uphold his part of the deal...Instead he betrayed Kaida, alerting Bellanora to "Kaida's attempt at using his power to Usurp her". Even without Osgarius's lies Bellanora would never have loved her, even if she had become a naturally Female Salandit, she'd only see her as competition for Kaida's little sister Belladona. Kaida was forced to flee the island leaving her sister and her best friend behind and stowed away on a ship to wherever it was going to bring her.

Kaida eventually arrived at Treasure Town, she spent time as a street urchin before being caught by the guards and taken to an orphanage, where she was discovered by another older Salazzle lady named Marie Lacroix. Despite her age she was never able to have eggs of her own. The two of them were exactly what the other had been looking for; Marie needed a daughter she could love and Kaida wanted a mother to be loved by and accept her for who she is. Admittedly she spoiled Kaida more than a little bit but she always made it a point to be involved in Kaida's interests, Kaida developed a love for ballet, theater, and adventure stories about Pirates. When Kaida was 14 Marie got sick and eventually passed away and Kaida was alone again...Another Salazzle close in age to herself named Aphrodite had an interest in Kaida and offered she join her Harem. Aphrodite promised to treat her as a girl Salandit but in exchange Aphrodite would take over the LaCroix fortune. It was a kind offer but Kaida didn't want to belong to anyone anymore, she rejected Aphrodite and declared she would become a Salazzle too. Thus their rivalry was born. Aphrodite would continuously use Kaida's insecurity about not being born a girl against her both verbally taunting Kaida and using her powerful Salazzle Pheromones to steal all of the Marie's Salandit servants. Kaida couldn't make the same powerful Pheromones that controls the harem, and would eventually ended up alone in a Mansion that she can't take care of by herself but still defiant and determined to keep forging on with her own path, whatever the hardship, she had to stand and fight for everything she had gained.

Kaida started her career as a Pirate boldly announcing that she would one day be the Queen of the Pirates and command every Pirate Ships across the seas! One day while a party she met a young Eevee named Morgan who had been raised by her father to be a perfect submissive bride so he could force his way into being royalty. Morgan's interactions with other children her age was always carefully dictated by their parents, so Kaida was the first person she met who was absolutely genuine. Kaida told her tales of her many adventures and misadventure and how she had defied the hand that life had given her, which in turn inspired Morgan as well to take her agency in her own life and defy her father. The two hit it off becoming friends and falling in love, even though her father forbid them from interacting, not that they cared what he thought. Kaida would just sneak in anyway and the two of them would run off to go have fun and mischief together. Kaida completley and unconditionally supported Morgan's dreams of being a Magician and told her once she had her own boat they would go around the world together performing in every city and every region. In time they would become known together as the Deadly Sins of Greed and Lust, the Salandit who does the impossible to take what she desires and the Eevee who let her heart guide her way in defiance of her controlling father.

Kaida would indeed do the impossible and more than once. First finding the Toxic Plate of Arceus which granted her a wish. She finally became entirely female and later evolved into the Salazzle she always knew she could be. One who can stand up to Aphrodite, Bellinora, Osgarius, and anyone else who once believed she was incapable of being anything more than what she started as. She will be the Queen of the Pirates, but first she is going to enjoy the journey to get there, owning the treasure at the end is never quite as fun as the adventure. Kaida's main weapons are a Flametongue Rapier which belonged to her mother that has the ability to stretch and bend like a whip, and a sass-talking Shiny Honedge named Render who picked her to be his wielder. Not featured in this picture, she also has a Greatsword created by the Forge God Heatran himself that can only be wielded by Kaida herself, a pole with a Metal Fist on the end, An Arcane Pistol that shoots Magic Bolts, a Crossbow that shoots Fireworks, a bunch of glass balls with explosive fluid in them, and a Sopt sign (A Stop sign but spelled wrong)

Do you want to join the Empress's Crew too? I am offering special full color commissions for only $20 per piece if you want me to make you your own Pokemon Pirate Character! Contact me for information regarding Commissions

[brighter-by-the-daly]

Rachel Daly x Millie Bright x Reader

Part Nine - Our Girl

The incident in Barcelona became less prominent in your mind as the days that followed passed, your bruises had started to fade and you were starting to settle back into your life with Rachel. Millie had popped by every day to check on you and the entire incident had made the news, programmes like This Morning had approached to tell your story but you didn’t feel ready yet. It was still too raw to talk about with your girlfriend let alone the entire world! Nevertheless you knew it would be a good opportunity to shine a light onto the treatment of women - nothing that women already didn’t know but it helps to keep the conversation at the forefront of people’s minds. You said you’d contact them when you’re ready but for now you’re just trying to transition back into your normal life. With your blessing, Millie had partaken in interviews discussing what happened in the bar and was revelling in the praise being given that she so rightly deserved. You’d give her every award that existed if you could, without her you don’t know what would have happened. The house was covered in flowers and you had eaten your weight in chocolate that had been sent from people who wanted to show their support; mostly teammates of Rach and Mills but your family and friends had also visited once you returned home. You know what happened to you isn’t the worse thing to ever happen to a woman and felt a bit guilty of all the attention being throw your way when there’s people out there who have dealt with so much worse who don’t receive half the attention that your story has. It’s only because patrons in the bar shared their videos online and the incident involved England’s captain that it had reached media outlets. Rachel reminded you every day that you’re allowed to feel cared for too, you don’t have to be silent just because someone has it worse than you. Millie came over most evenings to wind down with you both, sometimes not going back to her own house and staying the night. Her visits had become a lot more subdued and often consisted of you all just sitting on the sofa watching films; you three didn’t need words to make you feel at peace, just each other’s company was enough.

Your bruises that had faded to yellow were a few days from disappearing completely, with every day you were starting to feel more like yourself again without the constant black and blue reminder of that night on your arm. Every evening when you were snuggled up the girls would stroke it and pepper your skin with silent kisses believing the more love they gave you the quicker it would disappear. They smothered you with their love, reminding you every second of every day that they care so deeply about you. As soon as you made a move to get up they would ask what you wanted and would get it for you, not once did you make the teas during the week after your return, even when you bathed they tenderly washed your hair.

You still went to Rachel’s games and Millie would often be seen in the stands with you rather than at Chelsea ones. You argued that Millie needed looking after too, at least your injury didn’t put World Cup dreams in jeopardy! She should be the one being looked after, not you! The World Cup was approaching fast and in a few months they’ll both be off to Australia, Millie still wasn’t fit enough to play and you were growing more and more concerned with every passing week. The defender put on a positive face, believing with every bone in her body that she’d be better in time. You however, was a bit more realistic.

“Millie sit down, I’ll do this!” you rushed into the kitchen so you could boil the kettle, reaching for three mugs out of the cupboard before she could. “I’m fine!” she expressed, rolling her eyes and batting you away with a limp hand. “No, you’re not! I’m not leaving you here alone, you’re the captain now they need you to get better!” Wrapping your arms around her waist you tried your hardest to pick her up but failed, Millie ‘Brick Wall’ Bright could not be moved! “Rach, tell her!” you shouted over to your girlfriend who was tapping away on her laptop at the table. Looking over the top of the reading glasses to see her girls both stood with their hands on their hips willing her to be on their side. She took her glasses off to get her facial expression to appear more stern “best friend, I can’t go to Australia without you now do what she says!” Rachel was desperately trying to complete her level 2 coaching certificate so she could start her own youth team - not like she didn’t already have enough to do! She’d recently partaken in a youth group programme and her new goal was to create her own.

Turning to face Millie with a confident pout of satisfaction from winning, her eyebrow raised unamused with the decision. “If I’m so unfit, could I do this?” standing her ground as she suddenly picked you up off the floor. “Oh my god Mills put me down! Stop!”wriggling and slapping her back in frustration of not being listened to. Perching you onto the kitchen side and slotting herself between your legs, “better?” she asked sarcastically causing you to roll your eyes. Her move was sexy yet irritating at the same time, folding your arms reluctant to let her disobey you. “I don’t remember you complaining on holiday” her voice turned cocky which finally drew Rachel’s eyes away from the computer to join you both in the kitchen. “I’ve been waiting for the right time to ask this actually, what did happen on holiday?” sensually stroking up your leg as Millie copied on the other. “Is anyone gonna make the tea around here?” desperately trying to change the subject as you reached over to the kettle. Millie blocked your attempt “no” she said shaking her head with that cocky smile of hers. Having them both batting their eyelashes at you and still tickling your legs it was becoming extremely hard to think about anything else apart from throwing yourself at them. “Nah, I wanna know exactly what happened. I’ve waited long enough” Rachel said slowly as she swiped your hand from reaching the kettle switch again. “Millie’s not well enough for this, she shouldn’t even be standing!” you tried to divert their attention but actively not making any attempt to flee their advances. “I remember picking you up last week and you didn’t argue” she stroked the hair that dangled in front of your face away from your eyes, willing you to drop it. “I was drunk, I wasn’t thinking about your knee I was thinking about-” you shouted exhausted before being cut off by Rachel, “what.. what were you thinking about my love? Tell me” she encouraged. With them both looking up at you with their big blue eyes you caved “getting fucked! Happy now?” “fucked by who baby?” Rach continued asking with her sickly sweet tone as their finger tips continued sliding up and down your legs. “Millie!” your eyes rolled knowing there was no way you were getting out of this, not that you wanted to and you knew exactly where it was going. Rachel slipped her arms under your legs and lifting you off of the kitchen side, throwing you over her shoulder as she headed for the stairs. “Come on Mills, let’s go fuck our girl” Those words turning you on instantly with anticipation of what was about to happen.

Reaching the bedroom, your lips quickly found Rachel‘s neck, holding your hand out for Millie to take and be included too. “No no no” Rachel stopped you as she pulled her face away from yours. “I want you both to tell me exactly what happened that night, play-by-play” placing you softly onto the bed and ready to listen intently.

As Millie led Rachel through what she had done to you that night, Rachel re-enacted the moment precisely. You’d missed the sexual touch of your girlfriend as Millie watched her go down on you. Next, you told Rachel what you did to Millie and watched as she recreated the sequences on her best friend. The night continued well into the morning with you three fumbling around in the bedsheets together for hours.

[tessarionbestgirl]

I have yet to see a Rhaenicent hate on Harwin Strong the way they hate on Criston, and for the life of me I can't figure out why 🤔

Oh honey, you know why!

House of the Dragon has exposed just how racist this fandom is, and Rhaenicents take the prize.

But it’s not just the fandom, this show is racist af.

Rhaenyra sleeping with Criston is shown to be a mistake, so she quickly jumps into bed with first-man Harwin because he’s soooo much better than that Dornish creep.

Which goes to my main issue with Rhaenyra’s paternity crisis. If House Velaryon was black then so should Harwin! We don’t know who his mother was, she could’ve been from the Summer Isles. The fact they kept him white was racist, because no way can their white flower be in a 10 year relationship with a black man, no way can she have biracial kids who she puts above her white sons.

They replaced her relationship with Laena and gave it to Alicent because sapphic girlhoods are for white girls only.

Daemon went from loving Laena so much she’s the only wife he never cheated on to fucking his niece at her funeral because she was just a placeholder until white Rhaenyra became available.

Criston is the only one who truly loves Alicent, how does she return his devotion? By betraying him to the Aryan Queen because brown men aren’t deserving of respect and love, white women are better because feminism.

You have good points. Interracial relationship in this show are weirdly demonized. And the poc always get the worse treatment on the relationship. And this may be the result of white feminist writing.

Still one of the creepiest things I see a writer pull off with that Rhaenyra and Criston scene. Is clearly rape. Like he spend a good time fighting the idea and she slowly pushing him into the edge. And then give in. So of course he will hate after, because that is the thing about consent, you may enjoy something, but if it comes in a time you don't want to do it or you are forced to do it. You will bitter the experience. Criston situation remember me a lot of rape in marriage or yearly days of dating.

And then Sara tries to frame as "empowerment" lmfao. And then she goes fucking Hawin. Lmao you right, her babies dad should be a black man. the show made the Valaryons black for brownie points. But the consequences this bring to the narrative are so big and ridiculous.

First you make descendents of imperialist and slave owners...black people lfmao . And consequently make Rhaenyra extra dumb, fucking around with a white man trying to pass a white kids as bi-racial. That become such way bigger open secret that even fucking Daemon miles away knew she was fucking around.

Is even worse because Laena already is biracial and her kids with Daemon are very black, Baela is even more than her. So in comparison when put side by side with Rhaenyra kids is even worse. They not even tried to cast some white passing to make Rhaenyra look less dumb. And her relationship with Laenor is also bad. She boss him around and is disrespectful to him for the few scenes we get with them. She totally disregard his wants and needs.

Then of course they completely make Daemon and Laena relationship off screen, and imply he was just settling down, no love for her, no love for his daughters. And no polly thing going on. Because they totally want to erase the fact Rhaenyra is a very hedonistic character. But doesn't change the fact she already cheated on both her marriages.

Not to count the fact they erased the only canon woc love interest of Daemon....it was a joice.

And yes Criston and Alicent relationship. Lmfao you last sentence made laugh a little to much. I have nothing to add besides Justice for Criston Cole.

[cherryblossomforest]

19th & 20th September 2024

19th:

Today I had to take Giggles to the vet for more vaccinations and more flea and worm treatment as I didn't have any more. I'm ensuring her health checks are all up to date because I think I've fallen off the ball with that.

She was a bit nervous at the vet but wasn't meowing or scared. She wanted to hide and her crate was on the floor so I made a cup with my hands and she hid her face in it which was enough for her to feel safe. It was absolutely adorable. I gave her many head rubs and scratches behind her ears which she loved and she purred which was reassuring.

The car ride always makes her a bit nervous but she's soooo much better than she was before. I play some LoFi instrumentals when she's super anxious but on the way back she barely cried at all and took a nap. It makes me happy that she's starting to feel safe in the car because then I can take her on more adventures and she won't be so nervous :)

One thing I do need to get on top of is her dental hygiene. It's tough because she hates it but it needs tending to so I need to invest in some things! I don't want her to end up having any problems in the future.

When I got back home I rested some more and got to preparing for my job interview. I wasn't anxious but I was nervous. I got some examples I wanted to use also and by the time my interview took place I was feeling more confident. I answered all the questions quite quickly but also in enough detail and I taught one of the interviewers something about mental health which felt super nice. She said what I explained was quite nice to learn so I hope I made a good impression and I did feel like it was a good interview too. I was kinda buzzing after.

I was reminded that for someone who's in crisis, I'm doing quite a pretty good job right now! It felt nice to have Elodie around for the interview and it felt nice to remember things from work which I hadn't thought about in years. I really hope I get this job because it would be perfect for me to work from home and earn enough to support myself, travel and pay off my debts. Then I can eventually start paying for private therapy too and get a knowledgeable therapist. I need that and I really do think I deserve this too! Another thing is that I can hire a cleaning service to help me deep clean my home because I can't do it with my pain and mobility problems so that'll also make me feel so much better and I know I can pay my friend to help me too.

I decided to watch Forrest Gump which sent my brain into a bit of an overdrive I think. I ended up being so tired that I couldn't keep my eyes open. Just so exhausted! It definitely was triggering watching it again as an adult but very very relatable too in so many ways. Forrest definitely is autistic and Bubba too.

I ended up sleeping at completely the wrong time so I'm up at a weird time. I have my doctor's appointment tomorrow and I see my doctor and I just really need her to help me. I need my meds increased and I need a care coordinator or social worker. I need better support or I'm going to end up back in the hospital and I just really don't want to end up back there but I get no support and I really need it.

20th:

I thought I was having an episode... I thought the ceiling was going to collapse because of a noise I was hearing which I couldn't identify. Messed-up sleeping patterns mess up my mental health dramatically. The noise was coming from my upstairs neighbours but the anxiety that it was the ceiling about to cave in was farfetched...

I need to sleep

My sleep was really bad and idk why it has to be like this. I had a nightmare that I just couldn't get away from someone and they even found me on this blog and they showed me not nice pictures that they took of me that I couldn't remember (I basically had amnesia for the events and another part was present...but more in a way that they wanted to hide it from me too and was happy - since when did I have DID in my dreams??) That was overwhelming and it felt so real that I woke up feeling like it was real. That's always my biggest fear.

I'm so tired and stiff that I've ended up late for my freaking doctors appointment and I want to cry because I had one job but I'm so exhausted. I feel sedated. If this doesn't work out I want to give up now... I'm ngl.

It was so lovely to see my Doctor she's so lovely! As soon as I sat down she was like "Is it getting bad again [name]?" and from that moment I was holding back tears and that surprised me. She asked me if I was getting support from family and I explained that we had a bereavement in January and she remembered it was Dead Brother then she asked me if I was getting support which I wasn't. She asked me what's been happening and I explained that every September I get so much worse and I feel so bad. She asked if it's an anniversary for anything and asked me to specify and I actually managed to say it's a trauma anniversary from being raped which was so confronting but such improvement on my part. She then asked me who and I explained Dead Brother.

I think this is significant because I tend to think I talk about what's going on with me a lot and I reallllyy don't. This blog is the only place I actually talk about my feelings and not even my doctor knows much about me. That's bad. This was something my old ED T also said to me and I thought I opened up to her a lot. I really don't talk to people and I'm always holding everything in. Even my friends say this too so it must be true.

Anyway, my doctor has increased my Mirtazapine to the highest at 45mg and wants to see me in 2 weeks. She's also referred me to the crisis team (🙄) and a mental health practitioner to talk to as well. I see them on Monday. She said she's going to refer me to see a social subscriber which will help me get out of the house and maybe do things and for the first time I'm going to give it a go. She even said if I really don't like it I don't have to go so that's reassuring.

Right now it's been 30 minutes that I've been in this car park at the gp so I'm going to find somewhere to go...

Sometimes I wonder why it feels like the world just wants me to die, I try so hard all the time to get help and keep myself safe and it's just like no one cares enough to help. As much as I'm grateful for this help from my doctor and I truly am... if me reaching out for desperate help for another year doesn't work I'm so done trying. I'm so tired.

Oh my God I am so tired of being so alone.

All I want to do is listen to music but I know the music that I want to listen to will make me feel worse.

I'm not sure if it was my first time admitting what Dead Brother did, but it was definitely the first time telling a professional or anyone in person and my brain is going crazy.

Yep. First time saying the words out loud. Wow. That wasn't a good idea in the middle of September... body memories and flashbacks have started but I've taken 2mg Lorazepam to help calm everything down normally 1mg is does a good job but rn I'm struggling. I'm also being distracted by my loved ones which feels nice and I'll most likely cry some more.

Why is this September different? I'm remembering more memories even before the doctors appointment. It's so bad... so so bad...

[canonically47]

review pls!

disventure camp all-stars episode 20: review!

spoilers!!! (no duh.)

i despise how emily was turned into a villain and betrayed trevor. absolutely dogshit, poor writing

ally and jake not being petty??? LMFAOAOAOAOAOOO

riya you did NOT work your ass off you got plot armour. KYS.

oh NOW jally are friends?? now they bond? oh my god fuck you. literally fuck you. such cheap writing to make them bond just in the second to last episode, out of NEED rather than WANT. my god.

“i’m glad you’re still here, jake, we all are” first tom says jake sees the best in people and now this? ONC stop mischaracterizing your characters lmaoaoao

ALLY SAID SUS LMFAOAOAOAO

why did ally INSTANTLY agree to this. the fuck.

oh this is cheap. this is just cheap. not only is ally fucking stupid, but didn’t she just say she saw season one? like? she wouldve seen how jake cried at his grandmas death?? the fuck?? do the writers think we are stupid?????

thank you kristal for putting an end to that cheer

why didn’t they make yul’s scar permanent ://

what the fuck is that flashback sequence

“can’t get caught lacking” killing myself

why did they stop mining while they talked bro

why is ally using minecraft logic in real life i despise her actually i’m so sorry 😭

YAY YUL DIED oh nvm ://

and james fell in love right then and there yay!

this emily plot is so annoying i despise how they wrote her, why are the writers so fucking stupid

why are yul and riya so stupid also

i love how alec is rooting for ally because fiore is helping her. they’re so family-coded <3

jake protecting fiore awwwww :((( <333

JAMES SAID WHAT.

THEY’RE DATING

“riya #screenhog” I LOVE YOU JAMES

JAMES SOUNDED SO SCARED FOR JAKE OMG

why did he put his whole body on his to listen to his pulse omg thats crazy gay people are insane

ew why are these two here

im with emily on this why do you care for him trevor

derek why are you acting surprised he kissed you the fuck 😭⁉️

yeah i hate how they treated emily. it’s actually so bad how they made her this super likable character then ruined her for shock value, god forbid a woman gets between the no-chemistry yaoi right? such cheap writing is crazyyy

like they know the fans love her so much to the point where they confirmed her as queer because in ONC’s eyes queer characters > non-queer characters,, i guess, and then they gave her. this treatment. wow

for once im with yul on this !

yo riya if you want to win you should like. keep going???

yas ally your feelings matter! i wish i cared for you, or that the show was good, or that the writing wasn’t trash, so this moment meant something to me!

PARDONNNNN??????????

JAKE IS OUT WHAT????????

oh WAIT?? WAIT??????

OH MY GOD??????????????

HELLLLLLLLL YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS

JAAAAAAAKEEEEEEEE RAHHHHHHHHHHHH

man fuck your emotional moment ally idgaf JAKEEEEEEEEEE WOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOO 🗣️🗣️🗣️‼️‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥

if riya wins i am KILLING MYSELF !!!!!!!!!!

LETS GO JAKE YOU CAN WIN

why are we panning back to trevek eurgrhrhhr ew

thank you so much for ruining that kiss kristal i owe you my whole life

uhhh this episode was dogshit for the first ten minutes, and then for the most part was just mediocre if not just bad. the audio mixing was bad, the voice acting & delivery horribly mid, especially for the high stakes here, like cmon ally a little more emotion would be nice i refuse to hype up yul but my god his actor is the best of all; and then just. i realized how much this finale fucking sucks and how i genuinely do not care for these characters and how badly the show WANTS me to care for them. they’re trying SO HARD. it’s SO FUNNY

i believe emily is the worst written on the show, and she deserved so much better. she was hyped up for nothing and her villain arc came out of nowhere. my theory is, ONC knew how little chemistry trevek actually have, and how much better tremily is, so they decided to make emily a villain so she wouldn’t get between the ship. which is laughable, and such cheap writing.

i say ‘cheap writing’ a lot sorry :(( unfortunately thats all ONC can do! so yea

uhh idk man this is like.. a 4/10 maybe? if i wanna be nice about it. cuz theres some good stuff in it (alec has a speaking line) (james is gay for jake) (ally loses) but otherwise idrk.

i am so so SOOOO happy this show is almost over i am counting down the days until its done 😭🙏🏼 yall are not catching me watching season 4 or rewatching anything. im gone the moment i put out the review for ep 21. like a dad going for milk. perchance

[power-rings]

Hogs and Suds

26. A bubbly bath together

Sonic totally forgot again, didn't he? She didn't receive any chocolate, flowers, or any other special treatment from him. Amy didn't really expect too much from him, unless it was their wedding anniversary, or even her birthday. Valentine's Day was overlooked almost every year by the blue blur. So, once more she wasn't too disappointed. Most of the day, Sonic was away anyway. During his absence, Amy just watched romantic movies. Ordered take-out, and cleaned up the house.

Not exactly what she had planned for the holiday. But, she didn't complain. Once Sonic finally came home, their nightly routine was pretty much the same as any other day. They talked about their day, and watched a movie together like they usually would on a Friday. Sonic couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong, though. After all the years they've known each other, Sonic was slowly starting to pick up on small things. Any strange body language from Amy, he would be concerned that he done something stupid; and she'll text him in the morning "we need to talk". Of course, when he would ask her... the pink hedgehog just responded that she was just tired. When they settled in for bed, Amy sat up to read a book, like most nights. It wasn't long before Sonic hit the pillow, he would be out like a light. Amy was probably up until midnight, or longer because the book had gotten so interesting. Sonic finally told her to get some shut-eye around 2:30am. Stating that would explain why she was so tired.

Amy shut her book, and rolled her eyes. She gave him a peck on the cheek, and then finally settled in with a sad sigh.

He had said he would do better about keeping track with important dates. Yet, again... failing to do so. It was just a stupid overhyped holiday, Amy started telling herself. His failing to show appreciation, and love towards her would never change how she feels for him. But, the effort would have been nice, though, right? She wasn't wrong for wanting him to show some effort, was she?

-

Unbeknownst to Amy, Sonic finally had realized what day it was when he woke up around 5am for his daily run. He cursed himself repeatedly. He had to make it up to her. He cut his run shorter than normal, and started hitting random shops. Now it was the day after Valentine's Day, a lot of shops were low in stock in various items he had wanted to get her. Flowers, or cards weren't enough and he knew that. She deserved more. Throughout the morning, and into the mid-afternoon he ordered her favorite flowers, chocolate, and he even purchased a huge stuffed animal that she had showed interest in. He reserved a table at the fanciest restaurant in the city. He wanted to get a spot for her to get a spa today but they were booked out, and closing early due to the weekend. He will just get that reserved for her on the next week.

Sonic stopped by Vanilla's cafe, to find Amy was helping her during the busiest shift of the day. He hung behind until the crowd started to clear out. Amy hardly acknowledged his presence, not even seeing him among the crowd of costumers. When he approached the counter, she instantly saw the apologetic smile spreading on his face.

"Can you get out early, Ames?" He ran a hand down his quills, feeling so bad that he had forgotten about yesterday. "I was thinkin' we could check out that Italian restaurant in Station Square. What ya' think?" His emerald eyes looking hopeful. She raised her brow at him, scanning over his features.

Before she could respond, Vanilla butted in. "Absolutely, m'dear! I can have her leaving by 4, will that work?" Of course the older Mobian knew that Sonic had forgotten about Valentine's Day; Amy tells her about everything. Sonic gave a eager nod, and smiled back at his wife. Before more costumers came rolling in, Sonic quickly apologized for yesterday, and the two shared a kiss.

When he was long gone, Amy approached Vanilla in the back of the cafe to help her sort through some inventory. "Is it so hard for him to remember stuff like this?"

"Amy dear, you've known him for many years. You think that would change automatically when you two became married? You'll one day overlook celebrating Valentine's Day, and just appreciate the small things... how he shows his love for you." The rabbit handed her a box of items, and went back to the front of the building to take orders.

Following her, Amy opened her mouth to argue. "But, I do appreciate the small things he does ... I... just.." Amy trailed off, lost in her thoughts. Honestly, she didn't know what to say from this point on. Perhaps, Vanilla was right.

As expected, Amy was clocked out at 4pm that day. She hated to leave the cafe, because the costumers kept flooding in, and it felt like they weren't able to catch up. They were running out of items that was their specials for the day. To make things even more difficult, one of their coffee machines ended up breaking on them, so they were short on equipment, and that meant the costumers would be waiting longer. Cream had came in shortly, and a couple other employees that were scheduled for a later shift. Vanilla eventually pushed Amy out from behind the counter, and removed her apron. "Go on. Spend time with your husband."

When she came home, she found the various items that Sonic had found for her. Thinking about what Vanilla had said earlier, she appreciated every single item that he picked. He actually did a good job for as forgetful as he was. After admiring the items, and sneaking a bite of candy, she started to get ready for the date. He told her the reservation will be at 6pm, so she had plenty of time to go through her wardrobe, and get some makeup on.

It didn't take her too long to find a sparkly-red dress, that was cut off near her hip. It showed off her figure very well, now that she was pleased with her outfit. Infront of her vanity, she looked herself over, and started working on applying some mascara, eyeshadow, blush, and scarlet red lipstick. She sprayed some of her favorite perfume, and one of the fragrances that Sonic actually could tolerate; which was hard to come by, because he typically stick his nose up at most of her fragrances she had bought.

--

When she arrived at the restaurant, he had told her earlier that afternoon he'd meet her there, so for about a minute or two in line, she waited, until the host got her attention. He addressed that because of the busy hours, it would be a 30 minute wait, until she would be seated. "It should be under... hedgehog. Or maybe Sonic?" Amy scanned around the city, looking for any sights of her husband.

"Ah, yes! Right here. Great timing. Did you want to wait until he arrives? Then I can seat the two of you."

It was clear that she was disappointed, half hoping perhaps he was waiting for her inside the restaurant. She knew they were packed tonight, so she just said she'll wait for him at their table. Not long after that, a waiter came forward with a wine bottle. It looked expensive. "Wine for the beautiful lady?" It wasn't common for her to drink wine, but it was for a special occasion so she accepted the offer, and he poured a generous amount into the glass at the end of the table.

Amy probably waited about 5 more minutes, before long she was drinking a second glass of red wine. Finally, the waiter came back to ask if she was ready to order her food. With a sigh, she scanned through the menu. "A side salad with fettucine alfredo as the entree', please?" After he left her table to put in her order, Amy started to really admire the atmosphere of the restaurant. The owners really did not spare no expense, that was for sure. While waiting, she scanned through her phone. Hoping to see a message from her husband, at least. Only a message she hadn't opened, it was from Cream, and that was 4 hours ago. She gobbled up her salad once it arrived. She was far more hungry than she had thought. She ate half of some complimentary bread that was sat before in a basket. Finally, about 15 minutes later they brought the main course.

"Are you expecting anyone?" The waiter finally asked, picking up the menu that sat across from Amy. In disappointment, she shook her head. Then asked for another glass of wine before he left to take care of another table.

Tables and tables started to be cleared, only to be replaced with more guests being seated shortly after. Amy was long done with her meal by now, and decided she should not probably get another glass of wine. She felt if she had one more glass, she would be tipsy for sure. When the waiter came back to her table with a to-go box, and her receipt he was apologetic to her concerning her date not showing up.

Amy had became accustomed to it over the years. She thanked him, and complimented the food. She left her money in the sleeve with the receipt, and a generous tip. When she left the restaurant she wiped at her eyes, stubbornly refusing to let herself shred these tears. It didn't take her too long before she arrived back home. Anger filled her form, replacing the sadness that she felt. Quickly, she pulled dress over her head, letting it fall to the floor, and stomped to the bedroom with a box full of chocolate treats in hand.

Kicking her shoes off, and slipping out of her undergarments, she ventured into the master bathroom. After the disappointing day she had, she knew it was due time for a bubble bath. Either playing some music, or even a movie while she bathes... would probably suffice as well. While the tub was filling with water, and the bubbles started to come alive in the huge tub, she could have sworn she had heard something outside, but paid it no attention. She fixed the tray that was positioned over the tub, and placed the box of chocolates ontop. She carefully slid into the tub, giving a sigh of satisfaction seconds after getting into the water. Soothing away any aches, and for even just a moment making her forget the audacity of Sonic The Hedgehog abandoning her again.

Devouring the candy, and listening to some relaxing music, Amy was almost too relaxed, until the bathroom door abruptly swung open. She shrieked, and covered her chest to no avail.

"Ames- Oh... thank Chaos. You are home!" Amy frowned at the messy-looking husband of hers, as he stepped into their bathroom. He gave a sigh, and sat on the lonely stool near her vanity. He looked at her, noticing the familiar look he had received many times after he wasn't a no-show on their date night, "I can explain, babe. Listen... Eggman started screwing around-"

"Just say you forgot. Again." She was clearly hurt, and Sonic couldn't blame her. She turned away from him.

"I didn't forget, not this time! I swear..." Sonic stepped closer to the side of the tub, he couldn't help but admire her body.. although hardly visible with all the bubbles. "I'm trying my best to remember our date nights, Ames. I really am. This is why I don't plan anything... ya' never know when Eggman will be up to no good. " Honestly, she couldn't really too upset with him, Sonic had a lot on his shoulders as the well-known hero of the world. Quite frankly, it seems as if Eggman was starting to keep them apart more often than before they became husband and wife.

"I... was just hoping to spend more time with you, that is all." Amy gave a deep sigh, and reached for his hand. "We've been caught up with work.. and Egghead... it seems like we never find the time anymore."

He gave her hand a squeeze, and then left the bathroom to kick off his socks and shoes, leaving them near his side of the bed. He returned and nervously glanced at the water in the tub.

"Babe?" Amy eyebrows furrowed in confusion, watching the conflicted blue hedgehog.

Slowly, he stepped into the tub, gripping the sides tightly as he lowered his body further. Nervously smiling back at Amy, this earned a giggle from her. "You wanted to spend more time together... so.. " Sonic inched closer to his now blushing bride, his strong arms wrapping around her naked form, he went to kiss her and then playfully pulled away, "unless you're still pissed at me, of course?" He grinned from ear to ear. "But, I always did enjoy make up sex...so, shall we make up?" Quickly, he was shoved away, before Amy climbed ontop of him, and pulled into a passionate kiss.

[a-strange-inkling]

Two asks. First,what was it like when Eddie got his wisdom teeth removed? Second,idk if you've read or watched Daisy Jones and The Six,but some Billy and Camila moments give me hellcheer vibes. Rockstar and rockstar wife. (Minus the cheating from the show). Their moments with their daughter give me hellcheer with my OC vibes.

We will see Eddie get his wisdom teeth pulled and it’s pretty hilarious. He’s already got a dentist phobia to begin with so he’s a crybaby about the whole surgery. I just love writing both he and Chrissy loopy. I’ve not written drugged up/drunk hellcheer enough and that must be remedied.

I have seen Daisy Jones and it gives me absolute rage throughout most of the series 😅It’s a tough one for me. Mini rant with spoilers: The aesthetic is beautiful and it’s well acted but I hate Billy so much, it’s too difficult for me to get past that. I can’t stand stories where men like him get everything they want in the end after treating people so horribly and making terrible decisions. Not a Daisy fan either. Camilla deserved so much better than Billy and Daisy and pretty much everyone in the dumb band. She gave them everything and they all lied and betrayed her. She had no true friends. They may have loved her but they all failed her in the end. She should have taken that baby and left them all by the first tour. But no, she was so loving and gracious even in death and I just can’t appreciate her storyline or her treatment. It was so unfair.

But yes, Billy and Camilla’s reconnection and raising their daughter was some of the best scenes of the show, it gave me some hope, again the setting and era is just gorgeous. There’s definitely some aesthetic and vibe matches to Chrissy and Eddie with Livvy in the early years, but narrative wise they’re more of an antithesis to Billy and Camilla. Thank God!