#real ones know why i chose those lyrics

[kornknock]

out of reach, so far

19/06/03 + 29/09/03

[crueisummer]

𝐢 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐡𝐞 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐬 | 𝓒𝓛16

pairing: charles leclerc x reader

chapter summary: You surprise Charles at a race, and he wins and asks you to be his girlfriend.

playlist: ♫ gorgeous ♪ delicate ♬ i think he knows ♡ you are in love

author's note: Part 3!! I had a lot of ideas coming in with this one that's why it took so long xD Hope you guys like it! In my imagination, Max DNF and Charles won in Austria LOOOOOL jk. Anyway, thank you so much for all the support <;3

word count: 3.1k

disclaimer: All characters and events in this story, even those based on real people, are entirely fictional.

            𝐢 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐡𝐞 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐬

01:35 ━━━━●───── 02:53 ⇆ㅤ ㅤ◁ㅤ ❚❚ ㅤ▷ ㅤㅤ↻ ılıılıılıılıılıılı ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮

While sitting on the couch in your living room, engrossed in writing a song with a guitar on your lap and a notebook in front of you, your concentration was interrupted by the FaceTime ringtone. Glancing at your MacBook on the coffee table, you saw Charles' name and immediately answered the call, greeted by his gorgeous face.

"Hello, cheri," Charles greeted you as you set aside your guitar. He settled onto the bed, his head bouncing with a smile, and you couldn't help but laugh. Observing his wet hair and the towel around his neck, you deduced that he had just finished showering after receiving your text about being available for a FaceTime call.

"Aww, is my baby tired?" You teasingly remarked, knowing he preferred terms of endearment over his name.

"Very," he replied with closed eyes, his smile still present.

"I watched the qualifying today, and you did amazingly! P2!" You exclaimed with enthusiasm, as if you were the first one telling him his position, even though he was well aware.

"Merci, bébé. I was thinking of you while racing," he winked at you.

"No, you weren't," you playfully rolled your eyes, aware of his flirtatious nature, yet blushing at his words. Adding, "What time is it there?"

"It's about 9:30 pm here."

"3:30 here."

"Were you writing?" He inquired, noticing the guitar beside you.

"Yeah, just a bit. I've only figured out the guitar part for now," you shrugged.

"Can I hear it?"

"Sure." You reached for the guitar and played the chords for him.

"That sounds amazing. I'm sure you'll come up with the lyrics soon. You're like a genius," he complimented.

"Charles, please. You're going to inflate my ego," you jokingly responded, strumming the guitar. Suddenly, memories of the night you and Charles first met flooded your mind, and the lyrics began to form. Setting the guitar down on the couch, you quickly grabbed your notebook and pen, eager to jot down the lyrics.

"See? You're already writing it down," he smirked at you, shaking his head, secretly thinking, You are so talented.

As you caught up with each other, you suggested that Charles turn off the lights in his room, leaving only the lamp on, and make himself comfortable. About thirty minutes later, he was starting to doze off. Whispering a soft "good night" to him, he responded with a gentle smile and mumbled it back. You watched him sleep, waiting for him to enter a deep slumber before ending the call, recalling how last time you had accidentally woken him up by ending the call too soon.

Now, gazing at his peaceful expression, you wished he could always be like this. He had confided in you about the pressure he was currently facing—falling behind in points compared to last year, ranking 6th in the driver standings, and the heightened attention on him as they returned to Austria, where he had won the previous year—all while aiming to secure a podium win that would mark Ferrari's 800th. Last week, he finished P4 and was disappointed not to make it to the podium, and all you could do was offer comfort over the phone since you were in New York.

It had been four months since you and Charles had met, and you both agreed to take things slow. As part of that decision, you chose not to accompany him to the races. However, when he finished P4 last week, you couldn't help but wish you could be there to hug and support him.

"Please be here," Charles whispered, surprising you. He seemed to be sleeping already. Is he sleep-talking?

You responded softly, "Hmm, Charles? What did you say?"

"Here," He whispered again, and that single word was all it took for you to grab your phone and message your manager that you were heading to Austria. Once you were certain Charles had fallen into a deep sleep, you ended the FaceTime call and made the necessary arrangements. You packed your suitcase, booked a private jet and pilot, secured accommodation and transportation in Austria, all timed to coincide with Charles' arrival at the paddock.

Upon your arrival, Kika and Pierre joined you, handing over the VIP pass. The media immediately began taking photos, unsure of your identity but capturing the moment just in case you were someone significant. Your attire—a black tank top and skirt, a red Ferrari leather jacket, red Jordans, black sunglasses and Charles' Ferrari cap—made it evident that you were there to support a certain Ferrari driver.

"Charles says he's in the motorhome. He's asking why I'm asking where he is," Pierre said, looking up at the two of you, waiting for your response.

"Hmm, if you tell him you have a surprise, he might suspect something, and we don't want that," Kika contemplated aloud.

"Um, just tell him you need him to sign something," you suggested, pointing to the cap you were wearing.

"Wait, are you two official?" Pierre asked you.

“No, not yet.” You smiled sheepishly at them as they expressed their surprise.

“Wow. I bet he’ll ask you to be his girlfriend before the day ends,” Kika said confidently. “I would bet all my money on it.”

“I know he's been planning it for a while, but the surprise might be the cherry on top,” Pierre added, while Kika linked her arm with his and rested her head on his shoulder.

You laughed at their reaction as Pierre led the way to the Ferrari motorhome. You pondered silently, realizing that it didn't really matter whether you were officially a couple or not yet. Charles had been patient, waiting for you to feel comfortable with him, and you both agreed to take things slow. But lately, you couldn't help but feel that both of you were ready for a committed relationship. So, why continue waiting?

A few employees were present, but there were no fans or media in sight. Kika took out her phone to record the moment, and Pierre called Charles, instructing him to come outside. With Pierre on your left and Kika on your right, you stood nervously in the middle, removing your sunglasses and cap to make it easier for Charles to recognize you. You waited for about a minute until three figures wearing red emerged from the building. Charles was the first one out, scanning the surroundings, and when his eyes met yours, his face lit up.

"Y/N?"

"Surprise!"

Grinning, you rushed toward him, and he reciprocated by opening his arms, embracing you tightly. Laughter filled the air as Charles stood there, slightly confused but delighted, while you savored his scent and held onto him. In your imagination, you had envisioned this surprise and his reaction countless times, but nothing compared to the reality of hugging him.

The three people around you laughed and gushed at the sight, and eventually, you pulled away slightly, keeping your arm loosely wrapped around his as you smiled and greeted him with a simple "Hi."

"What? How? When I fell asleep last night, you were still in New York!" He exclaimed, his eyes widening with astonishment. His confusion was undeniably adorable.

"Yeah, but you were sleep-talking, practically begging me to come here!" You replied, creating some distance between you and Charles, placing your hand on your hip. He didn't appreciate the space and closed the gap, wrapping his arm around your shoulder, kissing the side of your head, as you faced your three friends, who were playfully teasing Charles.

"He begged you to come here!?" Carlos shouted in amusement.

"Just say you're happy she's here!" Pierre exclaimed.

“Wait, you guys are in a call while sleeping?” Arthur teased.

"For crying out loud, just kiss her already so I can turn this off!" Everyone turned their attention to Kika, who was still recording the entire interaction. Except for Charles, who gently placed his hand on your chin, guiding your face to look at him. As you turned to meet his gaze, his lips were already in close proximity to yours. He closed the gap between you and gave you a brief but tender kiss before pulling away.

Shortly after, Kika and Pierre bid their farewells, and you hugged and thanked them. Charles then introduced you to Carlos and Arthur.

"Ahh, so this is the famous 'Y/N' that Charles has been talking so much about!" Carlos remarked, smiling as you both stepped back.

You giggled and playfully asked, "Oh really? What has he been saying about me?"

"He's always bringing you up in conversations! Saying things like 'Did you know Y/N is like this...'" Arthur began, imitating Charles as the four of you shared a lighthearted moment.

"Shut up, mate! Go! Don’t you two somewhere to be?" Charles exclaimed, playfully shooing Carlos and Arthur away. They pretended to be offended but waved goodbye as they left. Charles then took your hand, interlocking his fingers with yours, and led you into the motorhome.

Curiosity filled Charles' expression as he guided you through the motorhome. "Seriously, how did you get here? Wha-?" he began to ask, but you interrupted with laughter, explaining most of it.

As he showed you the different rooms, you waved and greeted the staff. The motorhome had offices where people were working, tables and chairs in the middle, and stairs at the back. Charles led you up the stairs, pointing out the kitchen, and at the top of the stairs was the second floor, where his driver's room was located.

His room was small, with a closet on the left, a small desk beside it, and his bed on the right. You sat on his bed while he closed the door behind you. Commenting on the size, you remarked, "Well, this is bigger than what you described."

"Still, I don't like hanging around here," he chuckled, joining you on the bed. You looked at him, and he couldn't help but smile. "I still can't believe you're here. Did I actually sleep talk last night?"

“Yes! You whispered, ‘be here’ twice and I don’t know, it felt right for me to get here as soon as I can,” you explained and shrugged at the end. Charles' smile didn't fade.

"Can I kiss you now?" he asked softly, and you nodded in response. His lips were warm and soft as they met yours. They parted slightly, allowing your tongues to intertwine. The gentle tickle of his breath beneath your nose, his fingers gently combing through your hair—every sensation was heightened as you breathed each other in.

Charles firmly grasped your hips, urging you to settle onto his lap as he shifted back on the bed. Your bodies pressed against each other with passion, breathing heavily as your lips locked together. The taste of your shared breath lingered, accompanied by the feel of your combined heartbeats. With a slight fumble, he managed to remove your jacket, and his lips trailed a series of small kisses along your neck, leaving a trail of pleasure in their wake.

"Charles, you're going to leave a mark," you whispered breathlessly, reveling in the intense sensations evoked by his kisses.

"That's exactly what I want, my love," he replied in a rough, raspy voice. You entangled your hands in his hair and tugged gently, prompting him to withdraw and admire his handiwork. He looked at you, breathless, your lips reddened and swollen, your hair tousled, and a vivid red mark adorning the left side of your neck—a visible symbol of his possession.

Charles was about to speak when his phone suddenly began vibrating in his pocket. He reached for it and leaned against the headboard of the bed. Finally feeling your fatigue from the long flight, you put your head on Charles' chest and wrapped an arm around his stomach, closing your eyes and finding comfort in the rise and fall of his chest against you. You were almost asleep when you heard Charles bidding the caller goodbye.

"Babe, I have to go to the parade now. Do you want to stay here and take a nap?" Charles asked, running his fingers through your hair as you nodded.

"Okay, I'll be back in 30 minutes tops," Charles says, making a move to leave. At first, you resist, but knowing he'll get in trouble if he's late, you let him go. He kisses you on the forehead goodbye, and you're already fast asleep before he's out of the room.

"Y/N, amour. Wake up," Charles says, planting kisses on your face and arm to gently wake you up. You stir and open your eyes, and he smiles at you. "Sorry to wake you up, but you're going to watch me win now."

You laugh at his cockiness and ask him if you have time to freshen up. He nods as he changes into his racing suit, and you grab your makeup bag and retouch your makeup. Once you're both finished, he tries to lean in for a kiss, but you stop him, reminding him of your lip gloss. He groans and kisses your forehead instead. Holding your hand, he leads you outside the motorhome.

"I'm going to be busy now. Will you be fine with Arthur?" he asks, taking a sip of water while his hand remains intertwined with yours. You nod, assuring him you'll be okay.

"Are you sure? You can ask Kika to sit here with you, though," he suggests, concerned about your comfort.

"Charles, don't worry. I'm a grown woman. I think I can handle spending time with new people," you laugh, teasing him. "Besides, I'm pretty sure Kika would want to stay and support Pierre."

Once everything is settled, the two of you enter the garage. Charles greets everyone while holding your hand, and you wave at them. He shows you to your seat next to Arthur. Charles introduces you to Joris and Andrea, who are sitting beside Arthur, and then he leaves for a brief team meeting.

As you observe the garage, Joris asks if this is your first F1 race.

“First race and first-time surprising Charles.” You smile at him, and he tells you he’s going to show you something. He tilts his camera to you, and you see a photo of Charles at his apartment, smiling while looking at his phone.

“He was texting you, by the way.” He says and you blush, asking him to send you a copy of the picture. He nods and adds, “You know, I’ve never seen him smile like that.”

“Bullshit. You probably say that to all the girls he brings here.” You joke and chuckle at him.

He raises his arms and says, “Hey, I don’t have any reason to say that to you in the first place. So, trust me when I say that he’s never looked at a girl like that, ever.”

Arthur then chimes in, saying he's never seen Charles talk about someone so much, especially to his mother.

Your eyes widen. He told his mother about me? You try not to show any emotion as you ask Arthur, “What has he said about me?”

“I’m pretty sure all good things. I know she doesn’t like to judge before meeting someone, so she’s been asking Charles to invite you for dinner, but he said the two of you are taking things slow, and I think she really liked that.” Arthur smiles at you.

“Charles hasn’t had a good track record when it comes to dating, and Maman tries not to interfere; but you know.” Arthur adds and nods his head, and you did too. Charles previously told you about his two previous relationships and how fucked up everything started and ended.

You're interrupted when Charles approaches your group. He takes you to the side for a moment of privacy. He informs you that he has to go to the grid and asks if you're sure you'll be fine.

“Charles, I’m fine, okay? Now, good luck out there.” You smile at him and pat his chest.

“That’s it?” He says frowning. He turns to his side and taps his cheek. You laugh at him and gently held his jaw, tilting his face to kiss him gently on the lips.

When you pulled away, you whisper to his ear, trying to copy his accent, “Good luck, amour.”

He grins like a kid and replies, “I have my good luck charm right here.”

During the race, you wear a headset to listen to the communication between Charles and his engineer. Arthur explains the race terminology to you, and you enjoy watching the pit stops. When Charles briefly takes the lead and Carlos follows in second place, everyone in the garage celebrates, and you join in. Not realizing the film crew on the garage and zooming in on you celebrating until you saw in one of the screens. You stopped jumping and blushed, realizing there were cameras here and that you’ve been made by the media.

As Charles crosses the finish line first, Arthur and the others grab you and run from the garage to the barricades. Charles parks his car, stands on it, and raises his fists in triumph. The lot of you cheer for your driver. He removes his helmet and balaclava and was just about to hug you when you grab his cheek and kiss him passionately on the lips. You felt him get taken aback but he kisses back instantly. The crowd around you cheers, and Charles pulls away and smiles at you. He goes on to shake hands with Arthur and others before preparing for his interview.

After a few minutes, they step up on the podium, and you watch as Charles gets handed the trophy and he raises it. He looks around and locks eyes with you. He winks, and you make a heart gesture with your hands. He laughs and shakes his head.

You're glad you came to surprise him, knowing in your heart that you're ready for the next step in your relationship. While you had agreed to take things slow, you knew he had been patiently waiting for a sign that you were ready to start a new relationship.

As night fell and you found yourselves on the balcony of your hotel room, gazing at the starry sky, a feeling of familiarity washed over you. Charles lovingly wrapped his arm around your waist, resting his head on your shoulder as you look back at the day and think that your spontaneous decision to support him at the race was a clear indication of your feelings, and he knows it.  

Finally, Charles finally asked the question he had been longing to ask all day, "Will you be my girlfriend?"

A smile adorned your face as you turned to face him, his arms still embracing you. Without hesitation, you kissed him and replied, "Yes."

taglist: @notleclerc @elegantnighttragedy @buendiabebeta @i-have-no-idea-of-who-i-am @fangirlika @akahalloween31

[petermorwood]

*****

The "Willie McBride, who was only 19" of Eric Bogle's song "No Man's Land / The Green Fields of France" is also an Unknown Soldier.

Bogle used that name and age because they rhymed - McBrIDE / gravesIDE and nineTEEN / sixTEEN - not because they were real, and despite various claims, neither of the two McBride headstones in Authuile Military Cemetery are the man in the song.

Here's a Radio New Zealand interview where Bogle says so himself - it's from 11:50 to 15:08.

Inaccuracy or artistic license, it doesn't blunt the edge of those lyrics one little bit. There are several variants: I chose this one.

"Well, how do you do, Private William McBride, Do you mind if I sit down here by your graveside? And rest for awhile in the warm summer sun, I've been walking all day, and I'm nearly done. And I see by your gravestone you were only 19 When you joined the glorious fallen in 1916, Well, I hope you died quick and I hope you died clean Or, Willie McBride, was it slow and obscene? .... So I can't help but wonder now, Willie McBride, Did the young lads who lie here even know why they died? When they served with the Colours and answered 'The Cause' Did they really believe that their war would end wars? For the sorrow, the suffering, the terror, the pain, The killing, the dying, were all done in vain, Because, Willie McBride, they've all happened again. And again, and again, and again, and again..."

Illustrations by Dave H of Remembrance Art.

[narcosfandomdiscord]

Narcovember Prompt Roulette List

Saalud a mi gente! We in the Narcos Fandom Forever discord server are excited to bring another 30-day challenge: a multifandom event that we’re nevertheless calling Narcovember. Despite its name, this is open to ALL FANDOMS, NOT JUST NARCOS. Creators are encouraged to submit fanworks (fic, art, gifs, vids, op-eds) for any fandom your heart desires!

This event's format is a bit unconventional. Instead of a prompt for each day of the month, there's a Prompt Roulette Wheel and a Prompt Index (☟ below) featuring numbered items with three prompts each. Every day you'll spin the wheel. The number that comes up on the spin corresponds to a number on the index where you can then pick one of the three prompts.

So for example, say on day one, I spin the wheel and get number 8. I’d go to 8 on the index (titled These Damn Restraints). Of those three prompts, I like Yikes best so that's my day one prompt. Next day, I spin and get 14. I find 14 on the index (Decisions, Decisions, Decisions) and pick one of those for day two's prompt. And so on. Note: If, on Day 2, instead of 14 I got 8 again, I’d spin the wheel again to get a new number. If, for whatever reason, you don’t want to spin twice, you can choose another prompt from that "Book of" that you haven't used (e.g. Day 1, I chose Yikes. So Day 2, I’d go for, "Now you know why I never say anything.") Ideally, we think it’s more fun to not repeat index items, but ultimately it’s dealer’s choice. Aka we're not about to get real fascist policing, aint nobody got time for that.

Here's -> the roulette wheel. Or you can make your own! (Just make sure it has 30 slices.)

Use the hashtag #narcovember or tag us to submit your entries so we can reblog them! A note on the masterlist - bc of the Tumblr-imposed link limit, for now we'll only link the fic. BUT at the end of the month, there will be a comprehensive list with all the contributors’ blogs so ppl can find your other work easily. 

Happy spinning, everybody!

❖ Prompt Index ❖

1 — Book of Genesis

Fanwork inspired by someone else’s fanwork (be sure to tag the creator of the OG work!) 

“The fun begins here.” 

Ghosts

2 — Book of Fuck-ups

Righteous indignation glo-up aka fanwork that corrects a plot misstep or writing blunder that bugs the shit outta you 

“It’s not the what-ifs that fuck you up, so much as the what-might-have-beens.” 

Bite

>>>>>>>>>> more prompts below the cut <<<<<<<<<<<<

3 - Book of Stuff That Goes in the Junk Drawer

Fanwork inspired by a song and include why the song sparked the idea (was it the lyrics, genre? something you thought a character would like? etc) 

“It’s never too late to make history.”

Juice

4 — Book of the Uno-Card-Reverse

Fanwork based on your fav reverse/inverse trope**

“Evil isn’t always forever.” 

Mirrors 

5 — Book of Negative Spaces

Fanwork using a line from a diff show/movie as a prompt (e.g. line from Mad Men, “I don’t think of you at all” in a Narcos fic, line from Band of Brothers, “The only hope you have is to accept the fact that you’re already dead,” in a Hannibal fic, etc etc) 

“We gain more from our mistakes than our success, you know that?”

Pitch

6 — Book of (un)Consciousness

Fanwork inspired by a dream you’ve had (include 1-2 sentence summary of the dream at the beginning of the post) 

“Just dream with me.”

Technicolor 

7 — Book of Time-travel

Fanwork inspired by ancient mythology (Greek, Norse, aztec, celtic, etc. Bible counts as mythology, fuck it) 

“It’s only a matter of time.”

Constellation

8 — Book of These Damn Restraints

Fanwork that ends with 2(+) characters trapped in a phone booth with no way out 

“Now you know why I never say anything.”

Yikes

9 — Book of Fateful Conversations

Fanwork where the plot takes place entirely in the back of a cab OR where one character is the cab driver and the other is the passenger 

“You'd be surprised what you can live with.” 

Cursed

10 — Book of Nepo-baby Levels of Incompetence

Fanwork where character is in a profession they have no business being in with no prior training, so they fake knowing what they’re doing – like imposter syndrome except they’re just actually a fraud (e.g. Rust Cohle is a grief counselor, Richie Jerimovich is a hedge fund manager, Roman Roy is a beat cop) 

“And who hasn’t believed a flattering lie?” 

Evergreen 

11 — Book of Pit Stops

Fanwork that starts with a character hitchhiking and getting picked up by another character(s) 

“Tell me to stop, and I’ll stop.” 

Rush

12 — Book of Balancing In Between

Fanwork whose setting is a liminal space (e.g. empty swimming pool, bar or arcade after hours, airport terminal, church confessional, empty elevator, Twin Peaks black lodge, John Wick continental bar, etc) 

“Good things come in threes.” 

Wire

13 — Book of in Urgent Need of Assistance

Fanwork where a character wakes up on an empty submarine, 300ft underwater, thinking they’re the only person aboard until they run into another character(s) 

“One day I’ll wake up and it won’t hurt so much.” 

Desperate

14 - Book of Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

Crossover for 2(+) fandoms you have used before but 2(+) characters you’ve never used or vice versa 

“All we have are our choices.” 

Crossroads 

15 — Book of How tf Did We Get Here

Fanwork that starts off with 2(+) characters waiting in line at the DMV and ends in a completely different, totally unpredictable, why-and-how-tf-did-we-get-here place 

“There’s a moon a mile from here and nobody home.” 

Ambition

16 — Book of Locally Sourced

Fanwork that mimics a bottle episode, so the entirety of it takes place in a relatively mundane setting (e.g. the stockroom of a store, interrogation room, a hotel lobby, waiting room of a doctor’s office, etc etc) 

“Make yourself comfortable while you can."

Notebook

17 — Book of Inception

Fanwork that provides an origin story for a character that doesn’t have one in canon 

“It (he/she/they) made me who I am.”

Improvement

18 — Book of Mysteries

Fanwork where 2(+) characters have to escape a panic room. Depending on fandom, this can be like the innocent party version that you take your friends to for someone’s bday, or can be an actual doomsday shelter 

“I thought they were with you!?"

Endurance

19 — Book of Near Misses

Fanwork with 2(+) characters from the same movie/show/book who’ve never met 

“Looks like we missed our window.” 

Rattled

20 — Book of Sleight of Hand

Fanwork of partners (romantic, profesh, or both) running into each other unexpectedly while both are doing something criminal/something they know they aren’t supposed to do (e.g. burying a body, carrying out a heist, meeting someone they shouldn’t)

“You can't ask the truth from someone who trades in lies.” 

Brace

21— Book of Nerves of Steel

Fanwork where 2(+) characters do a B&E, but get stuck when the owner unexpectedly comes home, and they whisper-yell argue over how to get out

“You won't believe the day I just had.”

Cortisol

22 — Book of Identity Theft

Fanwork where 2(+) characters meet accidentally bc one has accidentally dialed the wrong number (e.g. Syd [The Bear] tries to call Carm to yell at him for Something Dumb He Did but ends up calling Cousin Greg [Succession] instead) 

“I'm not the one.”

Brand

23 — Book of Just Chaos™️™️™️

Cracked crossover/ship with 2(+) characters from very diff genres (e.g. Dwight Schrute [The Office] & Tommy Shelby [Peaky Blinders], Frenchie [The Boys] x Penelope [Bridgerton], etc) 

“You’re my idiot, forever.” 

Untouchable

24 — Book of Revelation

Fanwork where 2(+) characters are stranded in the desert and in a sick twist, must decide which one of them to leave behind in order for the other(s) to be saved

“I like that I don't have to worry about you.”

Rapture

25 — Book of Reciprocity

Fanwork where 2(+) characters play poker (or any card game that has betting) but the chips are magic and the winner gets extra years of life instead of money (e.g. say, in poker, green chips = $500, blue chips = $1k, red chips = $2k, black chips = $5k. In this scenario, green chips = 6mos, blue chips = 1yr, red chips = 2yrs, black chips = 5yrs, etc) 

“Fine, I'll do it myself.”

Quid-Pro-Quo

26 — Book of Abduction

Fanwork where 2(+) characters get kidnapped by a kooky cult, are thrown into the trunk of a car together and have to figure out how to escape

“Somebody has to be paying attention.” 

Spiral

27 — Book of Caretaking

Fanwork where a character accidentally shoots/stabs/otherwise maims another character and has to perform first responder, triage levels of first aid to save them (dealer’s choice as to whether it's successful bc yolo) 

“Don't make me take care of you.” 

 Ritual

28 — Book of Weaponized Passive Aggression

Fanwork where 2(+) characters attend a dinner party and witness that moment when a couple starts passive-aggressively arguing but not outright fighting in front of the whole table and it’s even more painfully awkward than if they just straight up fought OR the 2(+) characters are the ones arguing making everyone else uncomfortable asf

“I wish you the best and I hope you find it far from me.”

Attitude

29 — Book of the (un)Dead

Fanwork where a character dies and another character shepherds them to the afterlife like their own personal grim reaper

“We bury our dead alive.” 

Siesta

30 — Book of There's No Place Like ...

Back from the dead: a character came back wrong or right, but either way, no one else knows how to handle it

“Even if you make it, you’ll never really go home.” 

Homesick

**There will be a reverse trope list in another post for examples.

[alyona11]

Hi! So I am very new to Hadestown and I am watching the bootleg. I really love the dynamic between Hades and Persephone, but there is one thing that kind of rub me in not so good way, is Hey Little Song Bird implied that Hades and Eurydice slept together? I am seeing a lot of interpretation and it genuinely confused the hell out of me asdfghk

Hi! Well, tbf it's a tricky question, but the short answer is that Hadestown suggests that something might have happened behind closed doors. The rest is up to audience and actor's interpretation.

For example, Anaïs Mitchell often mentions in Working On a Song that in early workshops she often went with the idea that Hades cheats and pretty regularly even though these affairs mean nothing to him since the only person he loves is Persephone. It even had a cut song:

In her early drafts/productions of Hadestown you can often get the vibe that from her point of view it doesn't matter as much because they are eternal beings and love each other since the world began so does it even matter for them?

However, by NYTW this story line was cut apart from Persephone's line in How Long:

"I don't mind if you look at other girls, now and then"

"The girl means nothing to me"

"I know"

Plus the staging in NYTW Papers and Hades' protective peacock behavior with Eurydice around Orpheus in the scene also gives you a thought that they might have had an affair? Plus some bits like the fact that she has a line in Why We Build a Wall and her words "But don't you see? That's different with me!" - "Different than who? They thought they were different too!" Could also be interpreted as Hades suggesting some special conditions by granting her a role of a romantic interest. Whether the interest is real or not and did he use it or not is again up to your interpretation of NYTW Hades. He is more of a morally dubious guy (as all ht Hades are) so it's more up to you to either believe he would have cheated to put Persephone in her place or would just use showing off Eurydice as a brutal way to get Persephone's interest.

As for Broadway, I think it's still suggested and you can find profs in the lyrics but I think that they are what they are - suggestive and leave you to interprete it whichever way you feel comfortable. I think the biggest suggestion remains in Flowers with the line:

'I trembled when he laid me out

"You won’t feel a thing," he said, "when you go down"'

Which kinda can have a death meaning and sex meaning, tbf someone could have written a good article on how those topics are connected in Hadestown. So here, again chose one of the two or both.

But again, Broadway also changed the lyrics in How Long and the whole staging in Papers so it's less suggestive.

My personal opinion based on Broadway production is that it all depends on how the actor plays it and whether you believe this particular Hades is the type to sleep with Eurydice to get Persephone's attention and prove he is still attractive or he is more of a person who doesn't care about having the affair and his only goal is to get Persephone to react somehow by composing such a messed up hurtful plan. Personally, I prefer the second option maybe because I'm a pussy or maybe because I see Hades (whom I mostly base on Patrick Page ht Broadway previews) like a person who is desperate to get Persephone's attention in such a radical way like a cat pushing objects from your table to see your reaction. He wants to be stopped, he wants any reaction from Persephone. He even touches her by the shoulder before going into the office like "Look!! Look! I'm absolutely totally leaving! To cheat! See! Hey come on! I'll even take off my tie to show that I'm serious! Don't you wanna stop me???". Seems kinda way too extra to me. Like he could have just gotten to the office after parading a pretty girl in front of her and it would be understood that it's for an affair. But he takes so much time to make sure she understands that he can find himself someone when all he wants is for her to come back to him with open arms. I'm not sure he has the guts to actually damage his relationship to an irreversible degree (considering Broadway Hades is never stated as a cheater before the Eurydice sub-plot). Like it's one thing to take a mortal before her time and parade her in front of your wife (because what is a mortal life after all?) as a "replacement" and it's the other way to actually cheat on her and deal with the fact that she might never forgive him again if it is a deal-breaker for her considering they seem to be true to each other for all these years.

One interesting thing to note here as well is how Hades actors play the reaction to Persephone's line in How Long:

"He has the kind if love that you and I once had"

Because his instant reaction is "OH SHIT once had?? Does she think I don't love her still?? OH SHIT I BROUGHT THE GIRL THIS IS WHY SHE MIGHT THINK THAT", so he answers to that:

"The girl means nothing to me!"

Depending on the actor and she show the line sounds either scared, confused, angry, undignified etc. So it's once again up to you to interprete why he reacts this way: is he angry because she suggested he would actually cheated on her? Is he angry because she called him out on that affair? Is he confused and scared because she thinks he doesn't love her anymore because of his foolish decision to tease her in such a cruel way?

That's up to you.

P.S. I think one of the most interesting studies of the subject and Hades' character that I've read in a fic for that matter was the Songbird chapter of Winters Nigh and Summers O're. You can check it out, but I will warn you that it's probably one of the heaviest chapters of that fic in the emotional sense and it has explicit parts (don't worry, nothing bad happens to Eurydice. Well...apart from dying, I guess), so check out the warnings if you decide to read it.

[the-authoress-writes]

Wherever You Go

Prologue

Tom “Iceman” Kazansky x Aviator!reader (Callsign: Thorn)

Moodboard by @bradshawsbaby

Written for @roosterforme’s Top Gun Rocktober Playlist Fic Challenge

Synopsis: Tom Kazansky made a mistake.

Or rather, a series of mistakes.

He chose to take the assignment as an instructor at TOPGUN.

He fell in love with one of his students.

He broke her heart.

He chose to leave TOPGUN, and redeploy.

Now, he was stuck onboard the USS Nimitz with the woman whose heart he broke, with no way out.

Unbelievably, that’s not the problem.

Problem is, he still loves her.

Series Warnings: Teacher/Student relationship (but you already knew that) with no real age gap, warnings will be updated as the series progresses.

Warnings: Here be some cursing, because they are men in the Navy—they will curse.

Other than that, nothing really.

Author’s Note: “It’s only going to be a oneshot.”

Every author knows that those are the famous last words, and that is no truer than with this story.

I really, really thought I could make this into a oneshot but then I gave up on that.

Because I am so in love with this storyline, that it deserves space to breathe.

So this one shot is now going to be at most (hopefully), a six-part series.

*sigh*

Darn it, Val, what have you done to me?

Thank you so, so very much to @roosterforme for hosting the Top Gun Rocktober Fic Challenge, and for allowing me to use one of my favorite 80s rock ballads, “The Flame” by Cheap Trick.

Lyrics from the song will be peppered in throughout this series, because it’s too good not to, and the song is the reason this story exists, as it is what birthed the plotline.

Another thank you goes to the incredible @bradshawsbaby for making the stunning moodboard for this fic, which was beyond my wildest dreams!

Special thanks also to @valmare, the fact that I am writing Tom Kazansky x reader! fic is all your fault; but thank you so much for dragging me down with you, it’s been an absolute joy!

Not much plot happens in this prologue, but I think it’s important to set up the narrative.

Ice cold, no mistakes.

That’s what everyone said about him, and he knew it.

He’d be lying to himself if he said that some part of him didn’t enjoy it, that reputation for perfection.

But now, as Tom watched her doing preflight for her CAP in the shadows of his little nook in the superstructure of the Nimitz, he knew that he was staring at the biggest mistake of his life.

He watched her hands lovingly run across the airframe of her F-14, and he inhaled sharply in remembrance.

He’d only been able to feel her touch him like that once, but it was more than enough to burn it into his memory forever.

As he watched, the large form of her RIO, LTJG Emmett “Romeo” Kinford, came up behind her, slapping her on the shoulder, which elicited a bright smile from her.

It tugged at his heart, to see her smile, even though it wasn’t the same smile she used to smile at him.

What he wouldn’t give to have her smile at him again.

She was the first woman he’d ever really loved, and he knew she’d be the last.

But he’d broken her heart two months ago.

It tore him apart to have to do that, but he had no choice—not if he wanted her to keep her wings, much less her title as Top Gun of TOPGUN Class 1, 1987.

And he knew she belonged in the sky, so he made the bitter choice, and he suffered for it—they both did.

He was still suffering.

It was why he’d chosen to redeploy, even though he loved teaching at TOPGUN, could easily have seen himself doing it for at least another few years, because he couldn’t stand to stay at Miramar, where he had so many memories of her, about her, with her.

He hadn’t missed the half-pitying, half-understanding look Viper had given him as he turned in his transfer papers—the now-Captain had always been intuitive.

“You’re a damn good instructor, Kazansky, we’ll be sad to see you go.”

“I’m sad to go, sir, but I… feel that I need to do this.”

A nod.

“Alright, son.

I’ll turn these in.

You and Kerner should get your new orders in two weeks.”

Within a week, he and Slider were deployed on the Nimitz.

One week after that, VF-1 chopped in, Mav and Merlin included.

“What the hell are you doing here, Mav?” Tom grinned, smiling for what felt like the first time in weeks as he hugged his wingman while Slider did the same for their former Academy classmate.

“I quit teaching.”

“What?!” Tom and Slider exclaimed, while Merlin sighed longsufferingly, shaking his head.

“You loved teaching!” Tom continued.

The dark-haired aviator shrugged. “It was boring without you there—no one else gave me a run for my money.”

“Sounds an awful lot like you’re admitting that I’m the better pilot, Mav.”

“In your dreams,” Mav scoffed. “But again, I will admit it was boring without you there.”

Tom smirked. “Love you too, Mav.”

“Fuck you, Kazansky,” his wingman retorted with a grin.

“No thanks, not in the mood,” Tom deadpanned.

Mav guffawed, making Tom’s deadpan melt into another grin, before the other pilot threw one arm around his shoulder, the other around Merlin’s upper back (as that was as high as it would go without effort, given the RIO’s borderline absurd height of 6’ 5”). “The Layton Boys are back!”

Slider interjected, “Technically, we’re missing Wood and Wolf.”

Mav rolled his eyes, “Okay, most of the Layton Boys are back—better, Ronald?”

Tom sighed, preparing for the bitchfest he knew was coming—he’d learned at Annapolis how much Slider hated his full first name.

(That wasn’t even mentioning the absolute hissyfit that would occur if the middle name was whipped out: Evelyn.)

(It was his great-grandfather’s name.)

“Yeah, Peter,” Slider retorted.

Okay—nothing was going to stop this now, to paraphrase the song—Mav was just as bad; Goose was the only one who could call him “Peter” and get away with it.

An all-too familiar pissy look came over Mav’s face. “Dickhead.”

“Yardstick.”

“Asswipe.”

“Petey Pocket.”

That was new—he and Merlin held their breath to see what would happen next.

Mav stared.

Slider stared right back.

A black-haired blur rushed forward, and Slider took off running, the flight deck now thankfully free of planes, the next CAP not starting preflight for another hour.

“Should we stop them?” Tom asked Merlin, as they watched the other pilot and RIO run across the Nimitz, a faint “Come back here, asshole!” carrying on the sea wind.

“If it’s all the same to you, I say let them go; you don’t know how wound up Mav’s been.”

He chuckled. “Fair enough—Sli could use the exercise.”

Eventually, Slider finally slipped up, and half-tripped on a padeye, allowing the smaller man to tackle him, the chase devolving into a wrestling match, which further devolved into what could only be described as a third grade slap-fight, before it finally ended with both men on their backs, heaving breaths into their lungs.

Tom and Merlin looked at each other, and in unspoken agreement, headed over to their RIO and pilot.

“Missed you too, Shortstack,” he heard Slider mutter, once he and Merlin came close enough.

“Didn’t say anything.”

“I know.”

“You done, you little gremlin?” Merlin asked, a wry expression on his face.

Mav glanced warningly at Slider, who silently raised his hands in surrender. “Yeah, we’re done.”

“Alrighty,” Merlin sighed, offering his pilot a hand up, Tom doing the same for his RIO.

Once both of them were hauled off of the flight deck, the aviators/infants stared at each other once more, and Tom was just about to pinch the bridge of his nose in exasperation, when Slider extended his hand. “Truce?”

Mav considered the extended hand for a beat, before slapping his hand into the other man’s. “Truce.”

Slider grinned, and used their clasped hands to pull the diminutive pilot into a hug. “It’s good to see you, Mav.”

A sigh. “You too, Sli.”

They finally made their way below deck, Mav and Merlin dashing off to report to the Air Boss, before they met again in the Officer’s Mess, the quartet eating dinner leisurely, as none of them had a CAP until tomorrow.

To their surprise, Tom and Slider found out that Mav and Merlin would be sharing their berthing, and Tom couldn’t help but wonder at the Hand of God making such happy coincidences occur (or perhaps the hand of a certain TOPGUN instructor).

The four of them easily settled into the layout they had set up on the Enterprise; who would take which bunk or locker, which segued into the boisterous exchange of stories between them.

In the midst of the familiar camaraderie, Tom could almost forget the ever-present gaping hole in his heart, ignore the pain which always threatened to swallow him whole when he was alone.

But bedtime soon came upon them, which drew the exchange of stories to a close, and had them all lying in their respective bunks, and soon, Merlin’s deep breaths could be heard, indicating the man was asleep.

Mav was, as usual, dead silent, which always made him unsure if his wingman was actually asleep.

And he’d tried to see if there were any auditory tells in the other pilot’s sleep, but there were none.

Maybe eventually, he would figure something out to give away a sleeping Mav, but hopefully, he was asleep.

Slider, however, was pitifully attempting to convey sleep, his deep breaths a little too measured, Tom knowing all too well how the man breathed when he was actually asleep.

Ron, loyal brother that he was, wanted to make sure Tom was asleep before allowing himself to drift off.

So he allowed his breathing to slow, gradually adding the slight rasp in his breath that he knew Slider was listening for.

The last week of being back in a berthing with Slider had been a testament to his acting skills, not having had to hide how he was sleeping (or not, rather) from the other man since the Academy.

Eventually, his RIO succumbed to the siren call of sleep, and Tom settled in for another cold night, in more ways than one.

He blinked up at the ceiling, seconds passing like sand through an hourglass, and though he could feel fatigue pressing in on him, he couldn’t fall asleep, despite all the techniques the Navy had taught him, his restlessness punctuated by the sound of the launch and recovery of two night CAPs.

But eventually, between one blink and the next, Tom woke up to the alarm clock going off.

Realistically, he knew he slept, but it really didn’t feel like it, he felt just as tired and weary as he always did.

He dragged himself out of his bunk, swiftly silencing the clock, as the Slider-shaped mass of blankets began to stir.

“Ugh—I hate mornings,” his RIO moaned.

“Shouldn’t have joined the Navy then, Sli,” Merlin cheerily fired back, feet thudding onto the berthing’s floor from the top bunk.

“Yeah, what the hell were you thinking, Kerner?” Mav grinned, already in the act of making his bunk.

“Why, oh why, God, did I have to be cursed with morning people,” Slider declared, finally throwing off his blanket.

“You love us, Ron,” Tom smirked, unable to help himself, the affectionate snark coming easy to him amidst his brothers, despite his exhaustion.

“Ehh—ask me again after I’ve had a coffee.

Or a dozen.”

The berthing rang with laughter, and as the day progressed, it confirmed to Tom that he’d made the right choice to redeploy, the brotherhood they had, the self-proclaimed “Layton Boys”, being exactly what he needed to nurse his broken heart.

Their CAP was uneventful, being flown with Mav and Merlin, the guard frequency filled with their light-hearted teasing and conversation, and they had to be the cheeriest four men on deployment in the Navy’s history.

But inevitably, another night slowly closed in, leaving Tom alone with his thoughts, his loneliness and pain threatening to overwhelm him as usual, and all the façades in the world couldn’t do a damn thing against thoughts and feelings from your own mind and soul.

The call was, as they said, coming from inside the house.

He felt like he was going crazy; he was losing sleep, he knew he was in too far, in way too deep over her, and he wasn’t sure when he would ever stop feeling like the world had fallen out from under him.

As he fought the urge to toss and sigh for the umpteenth time, he heard a soft “Can’t sleep?” from across the berthing.

Tom fought the urge to sit bolt upright, which was a good thing, as it kept him from banging his head on the top of his bunk.

When he caught his breath and calmed his heart some, he whispered, “Mav?”

“That’s me.”

“What are you doing up?” Tom hissed.

“Pot, kettle.”

“I—sometimes people can’t sleep, Mav.”

“Bullshit.

You couldn’t sleep last night either.”

“How do you know that?”

Mav kept silent.

“I knew you had to be awake,” Tom scoffed.

“Yeah, well.”

Here, Merlin stirred, turning in the bunk above Mav, which caused Slider to also stir and the two pilots held their breath, waiting for their respective RIOs to still.

When they did, Mav crept out of his bunk, grabbing something out from under his mattress, before leaning over Tom. “Come on—if we’re going to be awake, might as well be awake together.”

Tom sighed, nodding.

Maybe if he got up, he’d have some hope of feeling sleepy, and he’d be able to get some sleep.

Mav led him to the unoccupied half of the berthing, on the other side of the lockers, and plopped himself down on the floor between the empty bunks.

Tom took that as invitation to sit next to his wingman, and he leaned his head against the mattress behind him.

A soft noise which he belatedly recognized as the sound of a zip bag opening had him looking down.

Despite the darkness, his eyes had long since adjusted enough to see Mav holding out what appeared to be a cookie of some sort—chocolate chip, if his nose didn’t deceive him.

“Carole made these fresh before I shipped out.

Have some.”

“Thanks, Mav.”

“No problem,” the other pilot murmured, mouth already full.

Tom bit into the cookie, just the right amount of chewy and sweet, with the perfect amount of chocolate chips.

He must’ve made some sort of sound, because Mav chuckled. “Good, huh?”

“Don’t interrupt me, I’m enjoying my cookie.”

“I keep telling Care she can sell these suckers—heaven in a cookie, am I right?”

“Mmm.”

For the next few minutes, neither said anything, and no noise was heard save the sound of plastic rustling, cookies being eaten, and the distant sounds indicating deep sleep from their RIOs.

But then.

“You’re thinking about her, aren’t you?

That’s why you can’t sleep.”

Missile lock—tone.

Sigh.

“How’d you know?”

“Doesn’t take a genius, Ice, even if I am one.”

Tom scoffed, lightly bumping Mav’s shoulder, even though he knew his wingman wasn’t being hyperbolic—the younger pilot had a Master’s in Aerospace Engineering.

Mav good-naturedly took the bump, bumping right back.

When they had settled again, Tom whispered, “Can you blame me?”

“No, I don’t.

But you had no choice, Ice, Jester made that clear.

You were between the proverbial rock and hard place.”

“I loved her, Mav—I still love her.

And she loved me too.

And I broke her heart.

I can’t just… forget that,” he frustratedly said, running a hand through his hair.

“I’m not asking you to,” came the even reply. “All I’m asking is that you admit it.

It’s not good for you to keep this all in, you know?

Isn’t that what you told me before?”

“Yeah, it is,” Tom sighed—he felt like he’d been doing a lot of that lately.

“Have you told Sli?”

“Kind of,” he muttered.

Mav hissed, “What does ‘Kind of’ mean?”

“He… he knows that I was in a relationship that ended badly while I was at Miramar, but he doesn’t know that—” despite the fact that the two of them were the only ones awake in the berthing, he whispered, “that she was my student.”

Tom didn’t know it was possible to hear a shocked expression. “Way to bury the lede, Ice.”

“Tell me something I don’t know.

I just—I didn’t want to talk about it.”

“So you stonewalled your RIO?”Disbelief dripped from the sentence.

“I…” Tom vaguely gestured, “gently led him around the full truth.”

“You fucking Obi-Wan Kenobi-ed him.”

He sent the other man a glare even if he wasn’t sure Mav could see it. “You’re the worst therapist ever, you know that?”

“I’m a naval aviator and an engineer, Ice, forgive the slight fumbling.”

“‘Slight’?” Tom scoffed humorously, and in the darkness, he could see an ebony-haired head shake.

There was a joke that a more uncharitable person could have made about engineering in regards to him, but he and Mav were long past that, and he was grateful, something he never would have said before.

“You should tell him, you should have someone other than me who understands, who knows what you went through, Ice.”

Tom could see the point.

And it would feel better, he had to admit, even if it would trigger Slider’s mother hen instincts to the max, even more than they were right now.

“I’ll think about it.

And don’t think I forgot that you were just as sleepless as I was.”

“This about you, not me.”

“Uh-huh, sure—for now, you little shit.

Now hand over another cookie, will you, Mav?”

“The things I do for you.”

The plastic rustled again, and a cookie was placed in his hand.

And as he ate Carole’s heavenly consolation in a cookie, Tom reflected on just how he’d ended up in this position.

To be continued…

Next Part

CAP: Combat Air Patrol

Women were not allowed to participate in combat units and fly combat missions until 1993, so a healthy suspension of disbelief is required to read this story, 😂…

The USS Nimitz (CVN-68) is the lead ship of her namesake class; commissioned in May 1975, she is the oldest US Navy aircraft carrier in service, and the oldest serving aircraft carrier in the world.

If you look at the nametags they’re all wearing in TG86, the second row says “TOPGUN 1”, so I’m assuming that there’s more than one TOPGUN session a year, at least in the TG/TG:M universe.

VF-1, a now inactive squadron based out of NAS Miramar, is the squadron that Mav and Goose belonged to before they went to TOPGUN, although it must be noted that, like most of the squadron patch designs in Top Gun, the patch design as seen on Mav and Goose’s flight suits, is incorrect and not matching the squadron designation.

I am assuming, though I have no confirmation, that Merlin was also part of Tom and Slider’s USNA class.

The “Petey Pocket” insult is a reference to the toy Polly Pocket, which is a toy from the late 80s, notable for its tiny size, which is being sold again by Mattel.

However, the toys did not come out until 1989, and they did not come out until much later than that in the States, and despite my best efforts to find a more period-accurate insult/comparison, the insult was too good not to put, so again, healthy suspension of disbelief.

“Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us Now” by Starship, from the 1987 film Mannequin, is the song Tom references.

A padeye is used to secure aircraft to the flight deck.

Taglist

@valmare

@callsign-skydancer

@permanentlyexhaustedpigeon88

@tadomikiku

@malindacath

If you’d like to join my taglist, just send me an ask!

[not-goldy]

We know JK didnt write the songs from his album, but he made very clear in interviews that he made sure to look for translations of the lyrics and to learn what the songs are saying before choosing them.

Oh so he got all translations and understood very well but still went with those fuck ass songs like 3D ? There's a line between sexy/explicit songs vs vulgar songs. 3D was very vulgar with many appropriate comparisons about women and sex... and JK still chose to sing them and include in his album. Forget they are all about him fucking women and orgasm but I thought he said none of songs is about him personally? Or is 'jikook song' narrative is only when it feeds the delusions ?

I love that this is what is stressing you out🤣🤣🤣

Let's get somethings straight..... pun intended

The Jungkook wrote a het song narrative was beget by you and yours- I and other 'Jikookers' debunked it and Jungkook confirmed our assertion that he DIDN'T write it.

So you and yours delulu point number one.

Check mark please.

Now here you are spinning the narrative into well he understood the lyrics blah blah blah blah 🙄

To that I say, OF COURSE HE DID.

We, the true stans of captain private Jungkook do know, BEEN KNEW, been always aware of the FACT he does check out the lyrics to the songs he covers and sings and he always understands what it is that he sings about or recommends.

Which is why we've always said he's queer coded as fuck because of certain covers certain song choices certain artistic lens and expressional point of views- he may not have written there for you but he sure as hell understood what the song meant its romantic connotations, it's queer artist and its queer codes and he superimposed that on Jimin as the object of his lens.

BOY I'm holding on to something won't let go of you for nothing. I'm running running just to keep my hands on you- is pretty much a rewrite of standing next to you one would say. Or perhaps the vice versa.

Jungkook is drawn to certain themes in music either gay or straight and he's selected one that talks about boy love gay love as layover over a footage of another man he filmed- I'm glad we can agree, you and I that that is something because he is neither ignorant of or stupid to know how such a content would be understood by the General public especially those outside Korea.

So I do agree with you, all jikookers agree with you that Jungkook checks out the lyrics of the songs, that he understands what they mean yadda yadda yadda.

The only delusional person I see here, is the individuals who fail to read any queer meanings into GCF tokyo and the many other queer coded moments of Jikook- wait that's you isn't it?????

Oh and FYI, we also know he's dated WUHMEN in the past and said he didn't particularly enjoy it or understand what the hype was about and never felt real love while dating the girlies.

Yet I think he found real love with Park Jimin and it knocked him off his feet. Gay love. Mh mh mhh

Love it for him.

Edit: and in case you missed the point here, 3D is a very commercial project not very personal to him. He had to choose and do what will sell....

Compared to a personal projects such as GCF in Tokyo where he didn't care how it was going to be received by fans or the commercial market- hell when he was advised to choose another member to generate clout and buzz he refused. He chose a gay song for that instead to promote same love.

That's how personal it was for him. No?

So there's that. What do you think about that too?

[princess-of-the-corner]

I think the only one I like out of those Secrets is Ivan singing heavy metal lullabies to his little sister.

Ya know what I have the list pulled up so I can go over them and give my opinions real quick!

1.) "When Alix was a child, she was given a rabbit as a gift... from her future self!" - Kinda cute. Hope she at least like, warned her dad somehow because dropping a pet on a child is a bad time.

2.) "Juleka's song: "Even if nothing is decided, nothing as solid as stone, everything can burn up and then we are alone... So love life, eternity."" - this is just the lyrics to what she sang as a record in Migration. On brand for her though.

3.) "Nino's headphones were given to him by his favorite DJ after a concert. That's why he always carries them with him!" - that's cute!!

4.) "Nathaniel naturally has chestnut brown hair. His hair is dyed by Alix." - Brunette!Nath is cursed so this isn't canon to me but it's a fun tidbit in theory!

5.) "Ivan sings heavy metal lullabies to his little sister. And she seems to like them a lot." - Adorable!!! I'm debating on yeeting into HC/LL because I always planned on him being an only child.

6.) "Sabrina's best friend before Chloé was Cléo." - Naur Cléo!!! No seriously whomst the FUCK-

7.) "André sells his ice cream at locations where famous French films were shot." - Fair enough. It works in the sense of always being able to find him.

8.) "Miss Bustier was once a student of Mr. Damoclès and once pinned a fish on his back as an April Fool's joke!" - This one's cute I love it! This one should come with an anecdote for the foreign audience that the French have a fish-themed April Fool's Day and this is a common prank for children. Doesn't make it less fun!

9.) This one was a 'sketch from Marinette' rather than a fact, and was an image of a dress. It's a pretty basic but cute dress.

10.) "Sass's favorite food is a tofu" - why??? Why is the Snake's tofu?? What happened to the fridge magnets with the gummy worm snack? Granted that didn't make the most sense either but the consistency.

11.) "Marinette wears her 2 pigtails in memory of a very good friend from school who is sadly no longer at her school." - In theory this is cute but I hate nearly everything about Socqueline's existence.

12.) "Adrien's full name is Adrien Émile Gabriel Donatien Athanase Agreste." - the absolute fucking EGO from his parents to have two of his middle names be their names.

13.) "Since Plagg adores cheese, especially Camembert, Adrien had to convince Nathalie that he is obsessed with Camembert." - Absolute fucking hilarious.

14.) "Gabriel's real name is Gabi Grassette" - I actually hate this. I hate this so much. Like it's inconsequential in the long run and it makes sense but GOD I hate it for some reason.

15.) "Kim actually has two surnames namely "Ature" and "Lê Chiến", then after their marriage both of his fathers each kept their surname." - this would be cuter if I didn't know it was a retcon of a retcon. It was originally "Lê Chiến", then they changed it to "Ature", and then they got backlash for it. But hey two dads now if only htey'll show up on screen! (this may end up in HC/LL? Debating).

16.) "What if Lila's biggest lie so far was that her name wasn't Lila?" - so on principal I hate this whole superspy con artist plot, but this is fucking hilarious.

17.) "The real name of The Gorilla is Placide I.T." - I think I already dunked on this enough.

18.) "Alya has received various Chinese treatments from Master Fu. So, he almost chose Alya over Marinette... to be Ladybug!" - I hate this one actually. Like not that I don't like LB!Alya! But she's new to Paris but has somehow received various treatments from Fu? Yet on the other hand Fu knew her very well and could've easily mentored her, but he decided to go out and choose some rando???? the fuck???

19.) "As a child, Marinette dreamed of tailoring a hat for the Eiffel Tower to protect it from snow. And from then on, all she wanted to do was be a fashion designer!" - That's really cute I love it so much!!!

20.) "Zoé's best friend in the New York City was Jessica Keynes." - I hate this. I hate this so much. This makes Jess look like such a shitty friend.

21.) "Kagami has drawn a manga about her childhood in Japan but she hasn't dared to publish it yet." - Adorable, actually!

22.) "Rose and Prince Ali stayed in touch after they first met and have become really good friends." - We knew ofc but it's glad to have it confirmed!

[tapingthedative]

THE EXTRA LENS (or Glenns)

So, early on I chose to include The Extra Glenns' shows in the google sheet listing all Mountain Goats live shows (pinned post) and where to download them.

Why did I make that choice?

if you're unaware of The Extra Lens (formally The Extra Glenns), it's a collaboration between John Darnielle of TMG and Franklin Bruno of Nothing Painted Blue. The project pre-dates The Mountain Goats but the majority of their known live shows are often partially also Mountain Goats shows. There are 23 shows Extra Glenns shows listed on the wiki, 12 of them are also Mountain Goats shows.

So, Because it's a John Darnielle project, there are so few known Extra Lens shows, and half of them are also Mountain Goats shows, I opted to include those shows on the list.

...But before the list, I hadn't listened to The Extra Glenns. And now I've only heard one.

I do wanna dive into them, but every time I consider it I think "I'll do it once I account for their live stuff and see what unreleased songs we do and don't have"

And now I've done it. Of the 23 shows (which are either fully Lens or partially), 10 of those shows have a recording of every Glenns song from it somewhere on the internet. 10 of them have none. and three of them have only a small portion (two of them have 1 song, one of them has two.

I'm not gonna list those shows in this thread because that would make it much longer. But I will list their overall catalogue real quick.

First off, in rare early versions of the TMG tape Transmissions to Horace, there are 7 songs from The Extra Lens back when they were The Extra Glenns. four of which did not get re-released somewhere

those four are:

Greasepaint Friday

The Moon (outside of the Horace tape. it was played live in '95 and '98, both of which are on the internet)

Sliding Down the Right Pathway

Bird on the Wire (a Leonard Cohen cover)

someone has posted that Horace tape to the internet archive

These recordings apparently pre-date The Mountain Goats

After that, they released 8 songs to 7 compilations from 1992-1996, an EP called Infidelity in 1993, and 2 albums. The first album was released in 2002 and is called Martial Arts Weekend. The second one is called Undercard and came out in 2010. Both have 12 songs apiece.

So, it looks like everything is accounted for. I can dive in. Right?

wrong.

There are four songs of theirs that have only been played live.

All Frosting has been played three times, two of which can be found online.

Alpha Aquae has the same situation

Brilliant Disguise has been played twice, one is online.

...

...

and then we have Going to California. which has been played once. the lyrics are online and there is no recording. it's the only lost Glenns song.

The google sheet is a constant reminder that we don't have everything, I wish we did but we're not entitled to everything. However, I am disappointed.

I did the research on these unreleased/Horace songs and I was getting excited "Wow, we have everything" and then we got to the last one... and it's gone. If Going to California were the first one, I would probably feel relieved that we are only missing one song.

but, that's everything Lens. I'm gonna dive in and let you folks know what I think.

If you've gotten this far, track 7 of this taping is the origin story of The Extra Glenns. it's hilarious. Sorry about the clapping and the whistling lessons, that part hurts like hell.

one day I'll find a good signoff.

[jokeroutsubs]

ENG Translation: Joker Out appeared today (3.11.2023) on the Headliner.rs, a Serbian digital magazine.

You can find the original text here

ENG TRANSLATION:

The phenomenon Joker Out… In Americana Hall* it was like there was no tomorrow

*in Dom Omladine

For those unaware, if they still exist, Joker Out is a pop-rock band from Ljubljana which gained fame after participating in this year’s Eurovision. Even though they only won 21st place, their career blossomed after the competition and so they became one of the most successful (if not the most successful) acts that participated this year.

They sold out tickets for nearly every concert with incredible speed, with a special emphasis on the former Yugoslavian countries. But, why is that?

First of all, this charming five are a boy band. A real, classic, boy band. We haven’t had such a phenomenon in our area for a long time, the younger generation have almost no experience with something like this. They came onto the scene at the right moment and gave the audience what they needed. And Eurovision came into their career at the perfect time to give them a flying start and to launch them from a quality, alternative Slovenian band straight to the stars.

The older generation loves them for their undeniable quality. When something that stands out from the crowd emerges, in which you can see years of work and which, as the career goes on, records only progress, the older generations stop being so elitist and know how to recognize it.

They partially love them because of nostalgia. With their attitudes and style, they are adorably reminiscent of some bands of the 80s and very easily bring back memories and briefly bring experiences that the generations growing up back then remember with melancholy.

Young people love them… well, is an explanation really necessary? Their concerts are like a party, two hours of euphoria and a total occupation of all the senses. It’s not hard to win over a young audience if you are like them: five charismatic guys who radiate with their existence.

For months, competing for a second of their attention, girls have been screaming over each other in the audience. They know the lyrics by heart, without knowing a word of Slovenian.

Tears of joy are already pouring with the opening lyrics of the first song. Having conquered Novi Sad, these guys arrived in Belgrade on the 2nd of November. The countdown is finally over.

Labyrinth-like lines in front of Dom Omladine hinted at a fight for a place in the first row, and even a few rows back. When the doors finally opened, the fastest secured their desired place, others were defeated and some gave up at the start and chose a place further back, for a more intimate experience.

Colourful outfits, shiny, neon makeup, sequins, pearls, latex, lace and who knows what other details and accessories found themselves in the same place, in the same crowd. So divided, yet perfectly harmonious, it’s clear these people belong where they are. When the members of the band joined their colourful scene on stage, the spectrum was complete.

Entering the stage, right on time, tensely prolonged but so spectacular, they set a standard that won’t be beaten for a long time. Joker Out opened their first concert in Belgrade with the song “Sunny Side of London”.

They introduced themselves as “five Slovenians who are here to sing for you”, but they are, really, much more than that. Bojan’s interactions with the audience, his smiles, looks and irresistible personality caused general hysteria from the very beginning.

With his wit, he held the audience’s attention without stopping and immediately gained their full trust. Although he’s the most mobile, with the role of frontman, he’s far from being the center of attention. It seems this is a band where everything is divided into five equal parts. The audience goes absolutely crazy for each of them.

“Bojan, I am not a baby seal, but can you please adopt me?”, is just one of the endearing banners that could be seen in the audience. Letters, bouquets, and bras flew towards them, almost non-stop.

Delighted that everyone present knew the lyrics and therefore addressed him in fluent Slovenian, Bojan spoke to us in fluent Serbian.

Although the audience was often louder than the speakers, the loudest scream was let out with our “Demons”, while “Katrina” was dedicated to a randomly selected girl in the audience.

There was such a strong collective energy that it would draw in even someone who has never heard even one of their songs. At the advice of the band, everyone hugged someone who needed it right at that moment.

To summarise, why did this phenomenon take over? When you have someone who gives their all to the audience, when they enjoy what they’re doing, everything makes sense. The five of them absolutely deserve every second of their success, there’s no doubt. Today there’s rarely a band that immensely values their fans, on whose stage there’s respect between the members. What they have is earned through sacrifice, work and talent. They’re aware of it and so are their fans.

These tireless, energetic guys gave their insatiable audience an unforgettable encore of five songs. As they themselves say, we danced and loved each other all night (loved them, ourselves, each other, or mutually, whichever happened to whom) and all that - as if there were no tomorrow.

After tonight flower petals, confetti, sequins, lots of sighs and someone’s vocal chords will be cleaned up from the Americana Hall in Dom Omladine, but the spirit of some seemingly normal Slovenian guys will remain within for a long time.

Translation cr: @moonlvster

(The photos are from their concert at 'Dom omladine', Belgrade)

[public-perv3rt]

I forgot about this blog because I didn't know what to post. So, I wrote what is basically an essay about Interfur (working title). Anyways, I'm not a furry, I just really like animals and Interpol.

I guess I should get into the meat as to why I picked these specific animals to be their fursonas, lol. Paul is self explanatory, he is speckled like a leopard, but even if he didn't write that lyric, I probably would've still chose a leopard. I could've picked any yellow spotted cat honestly, but I picked an African Leopard because I honestly like him being African Savanah animals à la Our Love to Admire album cover. I was debating whether to make Paul a jaguar instead sense they're found in Latin America and he seems very connected with Latin American culture, but I picked leopard because I kinda just like them a bit more, personally lol. I was also thinking about African lions, mountain lions, and Servals, lots of cats, but Servals are too lanky and skinny, and lions don't have spots!

I made Sam a spotted hyena literally just because I like hyenas alot, I couldn't really give you a real reason honestly. I mean hyenas are also in Africa (remember OLTA). Also Sam was asked what his favorite still image from OLTA was and he said his favorite was the hyenas sooo. (Daniel and Carlos said theirs was the Otter and I don't even think that was an Otter, I think it was a Weasel of sorts, but this isn't my album so what do I know.) (And Paul said his favorite was the Lesser Kudu, but he didn't even know what they were called, these guys know their animals!)

Daniel is a European Fallow Deer for the same self indulgent reason I made Sam a hyena, I really like deer. I mean Daniel has that look in his eyes like he's about to get hit by a car. And deers are herbivores and Daniel's a vegetarian. I've wracked my brain thinking about an anthropomorphic deer playing guitar with either it's hooves, don't know how that would work, or with human fingers, which just made me uncomfortable. I made him specifically a Fallow deer cause they keep their spots into adulthood and I'm sucker for spotted animals, if that's not obvious.

Carlos is a Borzoi Dobermann Mix because I NEEDED to make him a mixed breed dog okay. At first, I had him as just a dobermann because to me, Carlos is a very angular guy, he's shaped like a rectangle, and dobermanns are very angular dogs, with their pointy ears and their rectangular bodies. Their fur is dark like carlos’ hair too. But then I remembered he's half Columbian and half German, and I'm half south American too, so it just tickled my fancy to make him a mixed breed dog as a homage to him being mixed, like me, this is a projection on my part. Contemplated making him half of a Columbian dog breed but those are just not him. So he's a borzoi, half because I love sighthounds especially borzois, and half because of Gaius, a sighthound. Also borzois have slightly curly fur, and Carlos has naturally curly hair. I put alot of thought into this one. It's like half hedonistic because I love sighthounds, but it also makes alot of sense.

Also if I could make them all African animals, (like OLTA lest I remind you, this was all I was thinking about!) Daniel would be a lesser kudu, and Carlos would be a Melanistic Serval. I literally had an essay this length due on Thursday, and yeah, I didn't get any of it done. Instead, I wrote this, a decadent excuse for me to yap about Interpol and animals, the only things I care about.

[ozzybutweirdthistime]

"the main character" by will wood is a very gl!ranboo-coded song and here's why

(lyrics of the song are bolded and in quotation marks, analysis is in plain text)

"So, God forbid I'm seen just as an average human being" 

gl!ranboo isn't even seen as a real person with a life in generation loss. they're just a character-puppet-plaything for showfall media and nothing more. 

"I mean, imagine if protagonists just died in the first scene" 

SHOWFALL JUST WOULDN'T LET RANBOO DIE. THEY JUST WOULDN'T LET THEM DIE UNTIL CHAT ACTUALLY CHOSE FOR THEM TO DIE.

"I'm the gap between a tragedy and comedy"

rewatch The Spirit of the Cabin. now rewatch The Choice. THAT IS THE BIGGEST SWITCH FROM COMEDY TO TRAGEDY I'VE SEEN OCCUR IN A SHOW WITH ONE EPISODE ON BETWEEN. GL!RANBOO IS. THAT. GAP.

"I'm the main character, and you have to like me"

they are literally the main character of generation loss, and we have to like them if we want them to continue to be that main character, because if we don't like them, guess what! we can kill them! and no more ranboo main character funtimes! 

"I loot plot armor from NPCs. Well, they are to me." 

every single side character in the show, namely those in The Mastermind of the Warehouse, was a real person. however, because we don't control their choices, they aren't important to us. we see them as NPCs. they die as NPCs. 

"Villains are everywhere, that's how I know that I'm a hero." 

do i need to explain? gl!ranboo is referred to as The Hero multiple times, and for all three generation loss episodes, they are surrounded by villains, whether it's demon charlie, the puzzler, hetch, or even just the showfall media employees.

[almacambiondaughterofsaleos]

As a Christian, I was utterly disappointed by the way the show challenged the religion. If you want to challenge a person's faith, at least challenge properly. The lyrics of You Didn't Know show this very well. God is loving, kind, forgiving to all his children, we are all equal to him. And God wants us all to be with him in peace and harmony forever and ever.

Sadly, there are people out there who reject God's love and glory, and proudly commit their sins everyday. Because God is loving and kind, he will honor their decision, and he'll separate them from him, this separation is called Hell. Which is the absence of God and his presence.

In Hell, you are free to commit your sins as you want. Now, committing sin is naturally not a good thing, and God knows it, and he can't bear the sight of his children committing sin. He was filled with so much pain when he witnessed humanity committing sin left and right, so much so he had to start all over again, and in the end, he promised to never do it again.

That's why one day, God will send out all his glory to everyone, including the people committing sin freely in Hell, and when the sinners witness all the pureness of God, since they chose to be separated from God, they cannot feel the warmth of God's love and glory, and they'll slowly but surely feel bad. They'll feel hellfire and anguish inside of themselves, because they have seen the warmth of God, and yet still filled with sin. They'll soon feel regret and shame, and that's when God will offer them back to their true home with him. That's what's meant by the Lake of Fire. And where God spreads all his glory and forgives you comes from Isaiah 6:1-7.

A loving god will never bear the sight of his children in such a place like the lake of fire, creates by him himself, especially one who forgives. The Book of Revelation is very symbolic, and so is the rest of the Bible, so it's understandable why some may get confused and take things too literally. Even then, Hazbin Hotel should've seen the logic behind those kinds of things. It slanders Adam by the way, but I don't know what to say about that. From a writer's view, he's not a good character eitherway.

Again these people who grew up Christian actually don't really understand the faith they left. They project their feelings onto self-righteous Christians then call it a day. They also nary look into theology and all that stuff. They just see names and use them to criticize without real thought. And again everything you said is right. A lot of times hell is the result of our actions and everything in life is do what you can to prevent ourselves from being consumed by sins. If a show in hell understood that it would actually understand redemption and criticizing Christianity, but alas no. They barely understand anything and end ironically saying stuff people in Christianity already know.

[taylorrepdetective]

Maybe the funnest day // why? Tell us more about it!

Oh god where to start. First of all we got lyrics on billboards that seemed very kooky (like “have you ever kissed someone in a crowded room”?) And then mysterious lyric leaks that seemed INSANE including vigilante shit and Question. And no one knew if they were real because, while we are used to those songs now, when they were released it seemed impossible.

And then there was a leak of some of the audio, where whoever leaked it clearly had an agenda, because they chose the most inane lyrics and the sound quality was awful, so there was no way to understand that Karma was just a fun silly song, and that wasn’t representative of the whole album. But again we didn’t even know if it was real. And then Aaron Dessner hinted that there was more that we didn’t know about and we said “I hope he’s involved because this sounds real iffy.”

But also I heard the leak of Mastermind and thought “this song this is so cute, @9w1ft needs to hear this”, but she was hesitant to listen to the leaks but I said I thought she should hear this one so she listened and FREAKED OUT.

And then the album dropped and we found out those were real and yes Question was in fact completely insane, but it was actually good once you got over the shock of the of odder songs like labyrinth and maroon and Question and Midnight Rain. And then there were all these rumors swirling about a double drop at 3am (midnight for me so I was awake,) and then we got more midnight madness and there were indeed Aaron songs. And I was in a chat with Sarah and someone else and first we looked at the song titles and saw The Great War and Paris and we were all OMG and I was yelling at Sarah as I was reading the lyrics, but she was in a meeting, reading DMs under the table and couldn’t respond. I was yelling because Sarah and I had a whole THING for years, both about Taylor and Paris, and about her war imagery, and here were these songs that felt like they were straight out of our DMs from like 2-4 years prior. And then as I was starting to drift into hallucinatory lack of sleep, Sarah finally was able to listen to the 3 am tracks and we yelled about that for a while and I decided I would need to call in sick because it was like, 4am, and I was still wide awake. And then we woke up to the Anti Hero video and that was great fun. And I was as so wired and tired that I hadn’t even processed Dear Reader and when I finally did, well… anyway what a fun release. I don’t think it will ever be topped.

[jorisjurgen]

My Kerubim Playlist - explained

Very self indulgent post going into details on why I picked certain songs for my playlist. Will explain the other playlists later because this post took ages to write.

CHILDHOOD PART:

1. Kikuo - the Good Child and the Fox Spirit

I chose this song because Ecaflip is a bad father. Yay <3

It's also a parallel to the song "You Are A Worthless Child" by Kikuo, which is on Atcham's playlist.

2. Regina Spektor - Two Birds

I chose this song because,,, I like to think that Atcham and Kerubim had very different visions if their lives and futures, when they were kids. And Ecaflip's manipulation didn't really help.

3. Maretu - The Flavor of a Cockroach

I chose this song because it's very unique in being a song about bullying from the perspective of a bystander/bully. I don't think Atcham was having a good time in the orphanage, and him not having a good time was also making Kerubim feel unwell.

4. Eve - Sister

The thing about my playlists is that I like to use them as a medium to retell the story of a character. I think it goes well with Maretu's song because it expresses Kerubim leaving Atcham behind.

5. SEDO - Bad Mouthing

While I don't think Kerubim was bullied in the orphanage, I do think he was excluded and tried to cope with it by clownery and denying it was happening. And by trying to leave Atcham.

6. Abuseken - Um, Ren-kun?

This is a special type of song I add to playlists - a "vibe-builder". This song might not fit a character but it expresses story ideas of Kerubim and Atcham being badddd to each other, because the entire song is two people going "I'm going to kms because you don't love me" "Good I think you should in fact kys" at one another, which is entirely how I think they talked to each other at the tail end of still being on talking terms when they were kids.

7. Pinocchio-P - Isn't it "A"

The last song is very "Kerubim and Atcham" /neg, while this one portrays a conflict between two people in a less mentally ill way, exploring that neither is right and that both are looking at the world with different opinions that may or may not be the same opinion viewed in a different light. I thought it might be important to use this song to reiterate my belief that in this situation there is no right or wrong side.

8. Maretu - Maegamist

I always interpreted this to be a song from the POV of someone who closed their eyes from mistreatment someone close to them suffered, either by someone else or by their own hand - before realizing far too late how bad things have gotten. I do think Kerubim coped his way into Atcham detesting him.

9. Glass Animals - Space Ghost Coast to Coast

This song is inspired by the singer's real experience of finding out that his childhood friend tried to commit mass murder, and I think that when Atcham went off the deep end Kerubim uhhh. struggled. As we've seen in canon, while he feels bad about their relationship, he also unflinchingly thinks Atcham is a very mentally ill individual and has nobody to blame but himself for 90% of the predicaments he's in (at least, ever since leaving the orphanage). So this song's unflinching "I understand life hurts, and I want you to get better, but you are insane" energy is very fitting.

ADOLESCENCE / ADULTHOOD PART

10. Glass Animals - Take a Slice

This song is another of those "vibe-builder" ones. This song is very lustful, the most sexual one Glass Animals ever did. It follows the story of a female sex worker who is falling in love with one of her clients. I think it's a good opener for the part of the playlist that touches on Kerubim's youth, because the lyrics are vague, and Kerubim has an inherent femininity to his self-confidence and his crush on Lou, which is very well expressed through this song. He's a bit of a femme fatale to me, and this song is very "Kerubim Crepin at his most confident, to the point of arrogance. He is cute and sexy and dangerous, and he knows it".

It's also a very high point, which serves well, considering his life gets worse afterwards and the songs do reflect that.

11. K.Flay - High Enough

This being the first song after the one that serves as the "character intro" of adult Kerubim immediately sets the stage to his relationship with Lou being completely fucked and unhealthy, with him using this relationship to numb the pain of everything that happened to him.

12. K.Flay - Thicker than Dust

His "femme fatale" that was expressed in the last song is, in a way, just him abusing various substances and falling in love with people to distract himself from the whole "my parents died and I went to orphanage and my brother hates me and is a criminal now" thing. Less real confidence and more of him confusing numbness and need to distract himself for confidence and happiness.

13. K.Flay - Wishing It Was You

While he is using his on-and-off relationship with Lou as a painkiller, he does love and pine for her - but the whole song being "I'm drinking and imagining myself giving you head instead of drinking" is kinda very Kerubim-core. At this age he wasn't very deep and WAS addicted to multiple substances imo, including alcohol, frat boy style.

14. K.Flay - Fever

This is also a Lou pining song, but in a far more desperate way because Kerubim is a very lonely person and his way of living his life actively makes him miserable.

15. K.Flay - FML (FUCK MY LIFE)

Guys I don't think alcoholism and substances and being a cute sexy adventurer and dating are fixing him.

16. K.Flay - Bad Things

This is a very sad, hopeless, and introspective song about trying to drown one's troubles in addictions. With this one, I am slowly upping the sadness ante. And also, it is the first Very Self Aware Kerubim Song, even if it is hopeless (basically saying "I will never get better and I will be alone forever.")

17. K.Flay - Make Me Fade

A spiritual sequel to me including "High Enough" by K.Flay in this playlist. Instead of speaking of the relationship as a painkiller, this song goes fully in the "you make feel like I have disappeared, and it's a good thing", and feeling like Lou not being there is torture.

It also touches more on the budding understanding that life is baddd. Like with the lyric "Sad about the bad I've done, on my grave, please believe me."

18. K.Flay - Can't Sleep

The last K.Flay song in this huge chunk of the playlist that's nothing but K.Flay music.

The most explicit song in the whole "my life is bad" arc. References other people being displeased with the way of life that is being led, which fits with Lou probably not liking Kerubim's self-destructive behaviours but not really being able to help him and blaming him for said behaviours.

19. Glass Animals - Waterfalls Coming Out Your Mouth

This is so ironic about someone who seems shallow and very confident, hiding behind a veneer of being cool and sexy. The song itself seems funky and filled with vibes, but hides something deeper and more violent/ill.

This song seems like a conversation he would have with himself, extremely self-hatingly.

20. Abuseken - Menthol Tear

Another "vibe-building" song. It doesn't fit him well outside the context of this playlist, but here it is included to express his rising feelings of jealousy, "she is going to leave me fr fr", and feelings of inadequacy.

21. SODDIKEN - Hansel

This song might not fit him entirely, but it is a mirror of the song "Gretel" by SODDIKEN which is on Atcham's playlist, and does express a sense of a slipping mental health + Kerubim's abandonment issues and need to be the center of attention and love.

22. skyfish66 - Go Big or Go Home!

ALL GAMBLERS QUIT JUST BEFORE THEIR BIGGEST WIN! But to be serious, this is extremely Kerubim-core to the point of being self-explanatory.

It fits with the previous song's theme of "upping the ante to be liked" and turning your life into a show. And it is kinda... Ecaflip City-ish.

23. Kikuo - Love me. Love me. Love me.

OK so what if your father was a god and he wanted to manipulate you into spending centuries living with him and to do that he constantly berated you and said you were worthless but also sad you're literally the most wonderful and cool and amazing child ever. And what if your relationships all fell apart because you keep using people to fill the void within you that you have felt ever since your family died and your brother left you. Wouldn't it be fucked up or what.

24. TX2 - I Would Hate Me Too

"I'm a 5'4'' manwhore who slit his wrists. there's a reason I keep wrecking relationships. And I would fucking hate me too" - worlds realest kerubimcore lyrics.

25. Akali - Surrender

This is an another "vibe" song, and a very dark and cryptic one. I always interpreted it to be about a conversation that takes place during a break up caused by severe mental illnesses that have eroded a relationship in ways that are both unfixable and haunting, and uhhh. You can guess why it is in the kerulou part of this Kerubim playlist.

26. Nantoka-P - Love Love Nightmare

Its just a horror song, but lyrics "which one of us is the bad one?" and "I wished I would be the only one who exists for you" are Very kerulou, especially as reflections on a relationship that has ended.

27. DECO*27 - Ghost Rule (Cover by Crusher)

If I don't add this song to the playlists of characters whose central trait is being a liar/faker, the Blorbo Police will execute me.

28. GHOST - ROTARY DIAL

An angry sort of "everyone always abandons me and I hope every one of them dies for having boundaries and cutting me out of their lives for my negative influence" song. He deserves a moment of being toxic and a hater.

29. Red Vox - In The Garden

A song about the guilt that follows habitually ruining relationships, trying and failing to change, and escape responsibility for your actions.

30. K.Flay - Punisher

Themes of divinity of one's self in their life, which flows into the theme of being one's own worst enemy and obstacle.

31. K.Flay - Yes, I'm Serious

This always makes me cry, whether I'm listening to it normally (I am a big fan of K.Flay and the circumstances behind it's making are just. heartbreaking) and in the context of Kerubim.

In a way, in the context of this playlist, it's the finale of the "Kerubim being very mentally ill" arc of this playlist that's been happening since song #20.

It's very introspective and has many self-realizations, in a way.

"Really, I feel like I'm feeling the feelings of my inner child whose been pounding the ceiling; Repeatedly asking for reasons and soothing, so I found a bottle and covered the bruising; But I was confusing a numbness for comfort, abandoned myself while I slipped under cover." — ngl these lyrics make me fucking insane both in blorbo context and normal person context.

32. Shikiura Sougo - Poison me, I want to drown in you.

It's a very beautiful and dare I say cute song reflecting on a horrible relationship that is described as being "a painkiller" and "poison", ending with words that go something like "I want to face you properly and say I really do love you."

I think it's a very cute and melancholic sort of post-break up kerulou song. In the context of Kerubim, even knowing how bad things were, he still loves her and wishes neither of them did this harm, even if it is far too late.

33. Glass Animals - Heat Waves

This song is literally about a relationship that failed and it has lyrics like "I wish I could make you happy". Big divorcecore track. I am going to throw myself into a river.

34. K.Flay - Slow March

This song is about life moving on regardless, as you try to heal and make sense of everything that happened. I think he'd be in limbo, after the divorce, for a pretty long while. There's a reason none of his stores in the show take place after it...

35. Rainbow Kitten Surprise - It's Called: Freefall

This song is about battling suicidal ideation after things went just completely Over. Besides that, it also is a conversation between a godly figure representing the bad urges and vices and the desire to die (but also, depending on the interpretation of the song that you prefer, might be trying to help instead, despite his evil nature), and a man who is at the end of his rope and is talking to him out of loneliness.

Kinda Ecaflip-core ngl.

36. Arcade Fire - The Suburbs

It's a song about growing old. It's a song about moving on from even the things you thought were completely world-shattering. It's a song about regretting your youth.

It's a song about hoping to have a child just to show them how beautiful the world is before the damage is done.

37. DECO*27 & Pinocchio-P - (Not) a Devil

The version in my playlist is a cover, because I think the subs there are beautiful than the subs on the official upload of the song.

I think "angel who is being choked by purity and trying to appear better" and "demon who is trying to appear angelic" is a very good aesthetic for Kerubim and Atcham. Two opposites that are more similar than one might think.

I think this kinda fits because after the divorce and growing old, Kerubim and Atcham start actively beefing again due to going to a war AND due to Atcham trying to kill him in Astrub.

38. Nashimoto - Die In a Place Where I Can't See You

LITERALLY all of Kerubim's feelings on Atcham as an old man. He still loves him. (Sadly.)

39. Shikemoku - Hocus Pocus

YOU WILL NEVER GUESS WHY THIS SONG IS ON THE PLAYLIST.

40. K.Flay - Mean It

A song about wanting to get better to love someone more sincerely and without selfishness.

"I hope to die next to my daughter, let her sing me to sleep. Having made the mistakes of a mother, still I taught her to breathe [...] So when the world gets painful, she becomes her own god."

41. K.Flay - Get it Right

A song about wanting to become better, despite your impulses, wanting to break the cycle and carve out a good life for yourself despite how much it hurts.

42. K.Flay - Giver

Song about trying to unlearn selfishness and find a new way of living.

43. Pinocchio-P - KICK-ASS *LITERALLY

A song about waging a one-man war against your past self by holding yourself to new standards of not being a bad person, for the sake of your happy future and other people.

44. Iyowa - Until Your Tears Dry

World's Hardest Challenge: Imagine Kerubim singing this to Joris, without crying, throwing up, and then killing yourself.

I think this song fits very well with Dofus Cartoon-era Kerubim, and his thoughts on life, and Hopes and Dreams about Joris not repeating his mistakes in life.

45. Nagisa - Touch

A song about loving someone so gently to the point you'd melt at touching them, and yet hurting them anyway. Dying dying dying.

46. Trickle - Homunculus

A song about having tried everything but still being mentally ill and ashamed of yourself. Because bros, I don't think Kerubim is healthy even during the show, even if he did do a lot of work on himself.

47. Onoken - Fluquor (Deemo OST)

I shit you not, this song is literally canonically (I'm about to spoil a major plot twist from an oldass mobile game) about dying in the arms of your child who has no family left except for you, and your thoughts on it being "Being left alone is scarier for me, than it is for you. I don't think I'm going to heaven. Please hold me just a bit longer... But please don't forget to let go of me before I drag you with me."

Isn't it fucked. Haha. Btw it's one of those songs you should listen to at least once in your life.

48. VocaCircus - Déjà Vu

A song about cyclical relationships. I think it fits Kerubim and Atcham well, esp with them meeting once again in the movie. (Albeit not for long...)

49. syudou - Handle with Care

Imagine using a child to heal your mental illnesses and give you therapy and giving them so much brain damage that they begin to feel pleased when doing that after 6 centuries.

You will NEVER guess why this is on my Kerubim playlist.

50. R.I.P. - Mommy (Twins in Paradise OST)

Vewn's short indie animation "Twins in Paradise" is the closest we as a society will come to experiencing whatever emotions a depressing OVA about Kerubim and Atcham's childhood would make us feel. Marcy and Darcy are LITERALLY Kerubim and Atcham.

51. Hanyuu Maigo - Aun Beats

Listening to this song and thinking about Atcham dying in Kerubim and Joris's arms in the movie is just as emotionally devastating as listening to this song and thinking about the 48487538 years of separation between Qilby and Shinonome, or The Situation between Nora and Efrim.

This song has done a lot for doomed siblings economy, despite not being about siblings and instead the concept of doom itself.

52. Sohta - Twilight Station

I'm insane about Kerubim feeling anxious and ashamed of all his faults and the ways he wronged Atcham (and Joris).

53. Faded Paper Figures - Pointing at the Moon

This song feels the same way Kerubim loves people, and I think it's a good song for the end of the playlist. He loves everyone he's met this way.

54. Faded Paper Figures - Relatively

A general crepinjurgen-core song that touches on the theme of their relationship lasting forever.

[us3rnam3-r3dact3d]

how do u come up with your titles? they read like song lyrics- and if they are could u drop the songs 👀👀++ to what extent does that song influence the story? (my bad if you've answered this before I have terrible memory)

-🦀

Ooohhh crab anon, the bag of worms you opened!! You are completely right, (almost) every title of my stories have come from song lyrics. And not only have I compiled the songs for you, I’ve written a lil blurb on why I chose that song and included recommended songs for each fic with applicable lyrics. I hope these satisfy!

another cup of wine | “Brandy (You’re a Fine Girl” Looking Glass

Listen, I’m gonna be real with y’all. This one is just because Darlin’ and Sam drink wine out of cups instead of glasses. No deeper meaning here, just an applicable lyric I liked. The song does have a sort of swag and divorced dad rock vibe that I think Sam in particular would listen to.

Recommended listening

“He Needs Me” Shelly Duval

“I’ll take a chance / I will because he needs me”

“No Choir” Florence + the Machine

“And it’s hard to write about being happy / ‘cause the older I get / I find that happiness is an extremely uneventful subject”

the only anchor i have left | poem by Andrea Gibson

The only one not taken from a song. I’ll link the poem below. I think the whole thing is very good for Bright Eyes. Lost and anchorless without something to be angry about. A common Andrea Gibson slay.

https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/9548512-what-if-i-don-t-want-the-monster-to-stop-being

Recommended listening

“Your Needs / My Needs” Noah Kahan

“To see a friend, to see a ghost”

“your life, your dreams / your mind, your needs/ my needs. / Your needs, my needs.”

“Second Child, Restless Child” the Oh Hellos

“And they saw the trouble in my eyes / they were quick to recognize the devil in me.”

i always wanted to die (clean and pretty) | “Last Words of a Shooting Star” Mitski

One of two or three Mitski lyrics I’ve used since she is just so good. Tbh I don’t know where I was going or where I want to go with this one. The general vibes are… tragic. I might retool later on.

Recommended listening

“Lonesome Town” Ricky Nelson

“There’s a place where lovers go / to cry their troubles away / and they call it Lonesome Town / where the broken hearts stay”

“This Too Shall Pass” Danny Schmidt

“We think too big / we think our self is one whole thing / and we claim that this collection / has a name and is a being / but deep inside / when every cell divides / well, it sets upon the rule that states / self-interest is divine”

let this whole town hear your knuckles crack | “Damn These Vampires” the Mountain Goats

Somehow the only fic so far with a title from tMG, my favorite band of all time. I’m sure I’ll find more in time. This song has western vibes that I don’t think fits the DAMN crew very well, and somehow I paired this song in my one fic that doesn’t involve Sam. However, the vibes are immaculate.

Recommended listening

Seventeen Going Under” Sam Fender

“I was far too scared to hit him / but I would hit him in a heart beat now / that’s the thing with anger / it begs to stick around”

“Saint Bernard 2” by Lincoln

“Lord make me a liar ‘cause I swore to god / when swearing still felt like the truth”

it’s my gut i can’t ignore (i’m hungry) | “Gone, I’m Gone” Eva Noblezada and the cast of Hadestown.

Also surprising I haven’t used more broadway lyrics, but here we are. My absolute favorite musical which, in part, is about hunger driving you to do desperate things. This piece was so largely focused on food insecurity for me. Every chapter revolves around food to some degree, and even the metaphors and similes Angel uses to describe the world around them are tied to food. It’s something that those of us who grew up with food insecurity can relate to; when you’re hungry, everything reminds you of food. When you live hungry, it consumes your every thought. When Noblezada as Eurydice delivers the line “it’s my gut I can’t ignore / Orpheus, I’m hungry,” you can hear it in her voice. It’s worth a listen for that line alone.

“Abbey” Mitski

“I am hungry / I have been hungry / I was born hungry / what do I need”

“Class of 2013- Audiotree Live Version” Mitski

“Mom / will you wash my back this once / and then we can forget / and I’ll leave what I’m chasing / for the other girls to pursue”

as long as you’re with me (you’ll be just fine) | “Nothing’s Gonna Hurt You Baby” Cigarettes After Sex

This whole song has excellent David vibes. The protectiveness, the quiet possession. He’s a soft soul at heart, I think, and this song fits well. This collection is one of my faves just because we get to see many different sides of him and ways in which he can be protective, possessive. From quiet reassurance to acts of service to beating the shit out of people. As long as his pack is with him, he will keep them safe.

Recommended listening

“Cold Cold Man” Saint Motel

“Oh my love / I know I am a cold, cold man / quite slow to pay you compliments / or public displayed affections. / But baby, don’t you go over analyze / no need to theorize / I can put your doubts to rest / You’re the only one worth seeing”

there is a light (i feel it in me) | “Abbey” Mitski

Already tied to this series, this Mitski song is just perfect. An exploration of how trauma can effect us in ugly ways, this piece pairs perfectly with Mitski’s music. This song explores the deep hunger within the singer, countered by the lightness she feels within herself. Angel, in this piece, is haunted by their hunger and treats David poorly because of it. The light that he shows them helps them to reach for the light within themself. We love healing in this house!!!

See the recommended songs under it’s my gut i can’t ignore (i’m hungry).

the rest of you, the best of you (honey belongs to me) | “NFWMB” Hozier

Oh boy I could go on for ages about Hozier. His songs are on almost all of my Redacted playlists and so I listen to his work pretty much every time I write for Redacted. His lyricism and prose are evident in my work, I think. This piece, one of Angel’s first indications of how protective David is, fits so well with this song. Swinging wildly between protectiveness and possessiveness, David mirrors the song’s progression throughout the piece. I think “Belongs to me” is the operative part of this title.

Recommended listening

“You’re Mine” Phantogran

“(No one’s gonna love you) / (No one’s gonna touch you) / ‘cause you’re mine! / (No one’s gonna look at you)”

“Always Forever” Cults

“You and me, always forever / We could stay alone together / You and me, always forever / Say you’ll stay, never be severed”

i assume you’ll be coming for blood (that makes two of us) | “Venom” Little Simz

Alright so… for real… this piece should have been named “is it wickedness? is it weakness?” after the first (or last, depending on how you play it) track on Kendrick Lamar’s “Damn.” That entire album is a work of art, and it can be played cohesively forward or backward, each play telling a different story. Forward is Kendrick’s life as it is, and backward is how it might have gone had his father died when he was young.

In this story, the inciting incident for Sweetness to be so different from the Sweetheart that we know is their mother dying when they were young. I’m positing here that Sweetheart in the main universe still has their mom and that’s why they’re kinder.

Anyway. I stand by “Venom” being a banger. It’s themes don’t run as cohesively with this story as Damn.‘s do, but I can live with it. For now.

Recommended listening

“Damn. Collectors Addition.” By Kendrick Lamar.

Yes the entire album. This particular edition, too, since it is the “wicked” timeline.

“Love’s gonna get you killed / but pride’s gonna be the death of you”

“United in Grief” Kendrick Lamar

“Pray none of my enemies / hold me captive / I grieve different”

remembering again the full extent of what forever is | “Through Me (The Flood)” Hozier

More Hozier! We know I love him and the new stuff he’s put out for Unreal Unearth and all of it’s EP’s are changing me fundamentally as a person. Hozier’s work has always connected with me deeply, all the way back to when I was a repressed queer kid listening to “Take Me To Church.” Now, as he’s putting out this big push of music, I’m finding myself connecting with the core of his music again. This song, a song about surrendering to the impossibility and incomprehensible nature of love, is perfect for William and Alexis. Will’s love for Alexis isn’t healthy, and it doesn’t lead him to sound choices, but he feels he has no choice. So he surrenders to it.

Recommended listening

“Eat Your Young” Hozier

“It’s a kindness / highness / crumbs enough for everyone / old and young are welcome to the meal”

“My Love Is Sick” Madds Buckley

“You’re an infection / I am keeping / No matter the sepsis / you are staying / I’d rather the wound / Than have you removed / Enough rotting for two / Killing me, keeping me high”

the world (it burns through me) | “Through Me (The Flood)” Hozier

Oh boy two for one! I for sure snagged this from the same song as the last piece I posted too. Yada yada surrendering to love and all of that. Love is something that’s has happened to Darlin, not something they have taken an active part in. They take the opposite message from William in this song; they fight the current, don’t let the world take them under. They are a fighter, in the end.

Recommended listening

Arsonists Lullaby” Hozier

“All you have is your fire / and the place you need to reach / don’t you ever tame your demons / but always keep them on a leash.”

“Problems” Mother Mother

“I’ve found love in the strangest place / ties up and branded / locked in a cage”

and my body remains (but the person is gone) | “Divine Loser” Clem Turner

Asher’s main trauma response in this piece is dissociation, pulling away from himself and his body to protect himself. While “Divine Loser” isn’t necessarily about dissociation, there are a number of apt lyrics that tie in with Ash in this story.

Recommended Listening

“To Someone From a Warm Climate (Uiscefhuaraithe)” Hozier

“You’d shake for minutes there and move your legs / wrap the blanket over you and keep your head within / let your breath heat the air until you’d feel it getting thin / Uiscefhuaraithe.”

“Wait” Get Set Go

“Wait, wait for the dawn, my dear / wait til the sun gets here / and you will wait too long / he will be gone”

when i call, you come home (a bird in your teeth) | “I Know The End” Phoebe Bridgers

Ooohhh boy! I love this song. Phoebe does something to me y’all. This song is sad, which makes it an interesting choice for a, generally, happy ending fic. This piece, like most things I write about the pack in childhood, is tinged with a sad sort of nostalgia. It’s the knowledge that we as readers have that, whatever comfort and love David gets from Gabe is temporary. We know how this story ends. We know that Gabe will die. And so even these happy moments are seen through that lens. I Know The End.

Recommended listening

“That Funny Feeling” Bo Burnham

“That unapparent summer air in early fall / the quiet comprehending of the ending of it all / there it is again, that funny feeling / that funny feeling.”

“Black Eyed Dog” Nick Drake

“I’m growing old and I wanna go home / I’m growing old and I don’t wanna know / I’m growing old and I want to go home / Black eyed dog, he called at my door / The black eyed dog he called for more.”