#protein fragility

[biology-geology-beaches-india]

The Science Research Notebooks of S. Sunkavally. Page 208.

[bonejunky6669]

THE ISOPODS HAVE FINALLY STARTED BREEDING!!! i found a single pearlescent speck beneath a leaf while i was removing moldy chunks of banana and carrot, and if there is one newborn there is bound to be a dozen more hiding somewhere in the dirt!! this really made my night, because it means I've been taking good care of them and i will soon have a large culture to care for, use as clean-up-crews for my frog terrarium, and sell for my upcoming local isopod business :]

[quiidam]

I think that all of the Batkids get a different version of Bruce as a father. But I think part of what makes his relationship with Dick so unique is that he was almost like a teen dad when he raised him. Yes, he was well into his late twenties early thirties but this man had never had a pet let alone been responsible for another life when he started raising Dick. He knew nothing about children. So of course he let Dick drink coffee and pull all nighters with him, started teaching him how to drive at eight years old, let him bulk up on protein shakes instead of eating regular meals and read any kind of book he could get his hands on. He vents about his life to Dick, no real boundary of parent and child. He’s the reason Dick climbs and jumps from every high point in the Manor— he’s a flying Grayson, he can handle himself. Until Alfred steps in starts explaining to Bruce that children need boundaries, that children are fragile. Dick still jokes about some of the things he was allowed to do as a child, Bruce still cringes.

[majaurukalo]

But the way we perceive health and ability is truly problematic. No, eating protein shakes, avoiding ultra processed food, training everyday, running on the treadmill, etc. don’t put you out of the “dangers” of disability and illness (if we want to call it that).

No one is immune to illness, bad genes, accidents or old age. And becoming disabled or ill isn’t synonym of failure or “bad behaviours”.

Our bodies are fragile. Human beings are fragile. That’s why disability needs to be taken into account more seriously and considered as a social issue. For you, your loved ones and all the people you don’t know of but who deserve to be treated with dignity and respect no matter the state of their health and abilities.

I didn’t get sick at one year of age because I deserved it or because I was morally corrupt. How could I be? I was 1. It just happened. It was an autoimmune disease. That’s it.

[pangur-and-grim]

This is a genuine question! As a person who is into cat breeding and cares about animal wellness, I trust your nuanced opinion a little more than biased articles I keep seeing.

The short/blunt whiskers that Devon Rexes or other curly breeds are known to have: I've read some articles that say the cats don't notice/aren't bothered, while others talk about how a stunted sensory organ is detrimental to their health. I want to know what is more "correct" or true. I know the answer will be beyond a binary, so there's no real question other than; do you have more information about the general well being of cats with short/blunt whiskers.

I wanted to ask someone who is more attuned to the ethics of cat breeding! You were who I thought of first.

(If you don't want to answer this publicly, feel free to answer privately!)

it's not detrimental to their health for a cat to have blunted whiskers, but it's also not ideal.

you've actually asked a very interesting question! different people draw the line at how detrimental a trait can be before they consider it unethical, and I suppose blunted whiskers are within the hand-wiggling realm of 'not the best, but not the worst either' for me.

as another example, sphynx, peterbald and donskoy cats are in that hand-wiggling category, but they're a bit too close to the line for me. cats spend so much of their time grooming, and rely on fur for thermoregulation, so I wouldn't be comfortable purchasing a hairless breed. but other people view it differently, and still more people might have that same level of discomfort with breeds that have fragile whiskers like the Devon Rex!

for this reason, rather than splitting hairs (haha, get it?) on the hand-wiggly breeds, I'd rather keep my crusade targeted against breeds that are unquestionably unethical, like Scottish Folds (which have cartilage deformation that leads to painful arthritis) and Exotic Shorthairs (which have neurological problems due to their small brain cases, and also just.... can't breath).

I'm also being selfish here, as my allergies to animals have gotten worse over the years, and the rexed fur mutation that gives Devon Rexes their name reduces how much they shed into the atmosphere. that (plus their tendency to produce less of an allergy-inducing protein in their saliva) will help me live a lot more comfortably with my Boy!

[adaginy]

The Big Guide to Humans: Skin

First: Yes, it is true that humans have whole-body stripes that not all species can see. Yes, it is also true that they themselves cannot usually see them. They are an artifact of pre-natal development and are present from birth. They usually have no significance, though some skin abnormalities may follow their usually-invisible path (or may make them visible).

See body art for questions about deliberate skin markings.

--- Human skin is a soft yet durable covering made of stretchy proteins. It provides protection from water loss, pathogens and UV radiation, insulates their body against external temperatures, synthesizes a chemical they use to make their skeleton, and is home to humans' abilities to feel touch and to cool themselves.

The skin is made up of layers, further divided into more layers, and the different functions are distributed within them. The details of these layers are not necessary to know for working alongside humans; suffice it to say that the topmost layer may noticeably flake off in very dry environs and this is mostly harmless but irritating to the human, oozing a clear but yellow-tinted liquid (see immune system) represents a minor but disproportionately painful injury of having scraped off the uppermost layers, and bleeding (oozing or gushing a red opaque liquid, see circulatory system) means the injury is deeper still.

Skin that has been damaged can usually repair itself over time, although it may take assistance (externally binding the wound shut, for example). Deeper wounds are likely to scar, that is, to be repaired with a tougher skin of different appearance. This is not the same thing as a callus, seen on the base of human feet and sometimes on the fingers, in which the skin grows thicker and tougher to resist pressure injuries.

It is normal for tiny hairs to be present in the skin over most of the human's body, regardless of sex or gender. Both sexes may have prominent hair on their faces or torso after puberty (see lifespan and development), but it is much more common with men.

If the human is warm (likely if ambient temperature is above melting point of gallium) or has been exerting themselves, they may "sweat." Salt water will leak in small amounts from all over their skin, concentrated on the forehead/under their hair, in the soft socket under where their arms meet the body, and around the external genitalia, to make use of evaporative cooling. They may begin to smell strongly; they usually find this smell unpleasant. If the human is cold, or in some scary situations, the tiny hairs may stand up instead of laying flat. This is an evolutionary artifact from ancestors with thicker fur and no longer helps to keep them warm or frightens predators.

Humans' sense of touch is very sensitive, especially on their hands, but outside of their hands it is sometimes not precise. You could lay one of their hairs on a surface and ask them to find it by feel, and they would be able to do so with their hands even if the surface was not smooth. If you dropped a single hair on the bare arm of a human, they would feel it, but they would not be able to pinpoint its exact location without seeing it.

!! Due to tiny dangerous creatures on their home planet, humans will usually immediately attempt to remove the source of an unexpected small light touch, often by swiping at it with a hand or by jerking their body. If you are fragile or tiny, and this would damage or dislodge you, get their attention before physical contact. !!

While humans can only see a narrow portion of the electromagnetic spectrum, they can sense somewhat beyond that band with their skin. Infrared can be sensed as heat, especially at short distances. Ultraviolet can be sensed over time, as specialized molecules in the skin cause cells to sacrifice themselves to prevent it from penetrating farther into the skin. However, by the time the human has noticed the feeling of this cell-sacrifice, the skin is likely to be damaged enough that it will darken and/or become red and sensitive soon (within the timespan of a human sleep cycle). Humans with naturally darker skin can generally withstand ultraviolet radiation for longer periods of time before becoming damaged. When the darkening or reddening has passed, small brown marks called "freckles" will often remain, usually for the rest of the human's life. If the skin has reached the red stage, as the color returns to normal the damaged skin may come off in thin sheets as though the human is molting. Do not offer assistance with removal unless they ask.

Human skin is covered in bacteria, viruses, and fungi that are mostly harmless to them. This is covered in more detail under microbiome with some pertinent points under mating.

[biology-geology-beaches-india]

The Science Manuscripts of Satyendra Sunkavally, page 38.

[h5eavenly]

Fallen Star┃Jake Sim

nine -the devil and angel are entangled. warnings: smut and a bit of angst.

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You’re having a bad day. It did not necessarily start that way. In fact, your morning started out as one of the best in quite a while, from waking up ten minutes earlier than your alarm to the pleasant quietness that had swirled around in your apartment settling that same pleasant emotion to swim through every nook and cranny of your being.

And so, you find yourself going on a coffee run before heading to the company, a charming smile adorns your face that gets you a free blueberry muffin. It all falls perfectly into the pleasurable warm buzz in your chest. like pieces of a puzzle flumping into place. Crumbs of joy that had managed to find its way into you, separating the collective graying clouds of heartbreak you’ve been lying on for a couple of days.

But oh, you were so wrong. You should have known these clouds are gonna be replaced with a burning fire instead. One that you became too familiar with. It sets your soul ablaze every time you come face to face with the devil’s facet, clad in designer brands and doused in a seemingly uncanny aptitude for getting on your nerves.

Jake Sim.

“What the fuck is this?” he almost spits, a grimace clinging to his handsome features and a glare saturated with the same fire that’s burning inside of you.

“Coffee?” you reply, drily. Your gaze flickers between his eyes and the cup of coffee you handed to him ten seconds ago.

“It tastes like absolute shit. What kind of milk is this?” your hand twitches against your chest, you fight against an otherworldly urge to just smack him across the head and maybe pull on his perfectly styled hair that somehow manages to add grams of beauty to his already perfectly sculpted face –

Okay. Taking a deep breath in, you manage to trap in your wild thoughts for a mere second as you clear your throat.

“Califia. Isn’t that what you like?”

“This is not Califia.” he declares. His head swivels towards you with a deepening glare that somehow has your insides tying into knots. His eyes shouldn’t affect you this much but the dusted colors of dark brown and a light black on his lids only add sharpness to them. It has you pathetically kneeling into desire.

From behind him Sunoo sighs, abandoning his work on jake’s face and his brushes to walk away from the growing heated argument he knows is bound to happen. He has been a witness to it close to a hundred times by now.

“Call me when you’re done.” He calls to the both of you with a yawn. It falls on deafening ears as you attempt, fragilely so to glare back at Jake.

“it’s what I asked them for I don’t know what to tell you Jake.” Even his name leaves a bitter taste on your tongue, melting into something darker that you ignore.

“Well clearly someone is lying here.”

“it’s not like I can make the coffee myself.”

“Then don’t bring me something I didn’t ask for.”

“I’m just trying to be nice.”

“that’s not working very well for you, isn’t it bunny?” his tight brows and tongue poking his cheek shouldn’t also affect you, but it does. Perhaps that’s why it annoyed you, the fact that he was just so attractive yet so annoying. Pulling you apart with confusion. It all bleeds into frustration that bubbles up in your blood, so you huff. Refusing to accept defeat.

“I’ll get you a different one.”

You try to reach for his cup that he has deemed worthless, placed it on top of the table across from him. His hand circles your wrist before you do. His fingers are cold against your pulse, sending shivers down your spine and a pitiful gasp bubble at the back of your throat. Coming up with immense force and almost spills your deviant cravings right at jake’s face. You bite on your lower lip just in time to kill your embarrassment.

“Just get me a protein bar instead. I’m not in the mood for coffee anymore.” The lack of emotions in his tone is antithetical to the masses dancing in his eyes. growing darker in color, splashed with undeniable desire. Making itself so evident when he glances down at your bitten lips.

You swallow around nothing. Your eyes prancing between his as if it’s ever possible for fire to be added upon more fire. Like it could consume you whole and turn you into ashes that simply lays at the feet of the nation’s sweetheart. Another countless victim to the glistening of him. You don’t know who you should start throwing the blanket of blame on first. Your ex-boyfriend who cheated on you and left you to deal with despair on your own? Or perhaps it was the perpetrator who started this little game of mouse and cat? Translating itself into endless staring contests between the two of you and you always end up losing somehow.

It only got somehow rapidly worse over the week. Jake will peek at you in the most random of times. Between the fluttering of his lashes as he’s getting his face done for whatever upcoming programme or in the between the crowds of nameless people and amid the loads of work, you’re being crushed under. His eyes would find you one way or another. A thin line on the verge of breaking stays between you two. It’s in the lingering of his stare when you’re stuck in the van in the middle of unmoving traffic. He rests his chin in the heart of his palm and a wandering curiosity laces his gaze with a dazzling intensity. They’re piercings and more than anything clear.

Capturing you in place with the overwhelming knowledge that he knows exactly what he wants. It almost has you melting against the leather of the car seats. Like a flower loitering amongst many, almost blending in with everything else and hoping to be lucky enough to get picked. It’s pathetic. You grow hateful at it so quickly it should be alarming. It meshes into you taking it as a challenge, daring yourself not to be the first to be weakened and look away.

A smirk disperses across Jake’s lips each time with no fail and you stumble on your cold façade, swaying and drenched in a feeble coated loneliness. Yet with a coarse heart you take and take until you snapped.

It happened two days ago.

After a long day of work you find yourself in the all-too familiar elevator of the company. An Aching body and a hazy mind. Jake has his head thrown back against the wall behind him, his Prada sunglasses covering his eyes while Jay is next to him scrolling through his phone mindlessly. You bask in this rare tranquility for a few seconds before it’s interrupted by a huge group of staff members. Invading the cramped space. With a sigh and deflating shoulders, you move to make space. Squishing yourself into a corner as you hug yourself in futile attempts to make yourself appear smaller than you already are.

You’re surprised when another smaller group joins in as well leaving little to no room to breathe. Jake is somehow pushed right next to you and into your space. His scent breaks its way through to you before you feel him against your back, his chest pressed against you, and he uses his palm to rest on the wall right next to your head that is refusing to face him. Instead thanking God and the heavens above at the lack of mirrors in this specific elevator.

The last thing you want right now is catch your own reflection or even worse – Jake’s reflection.

The sudden proximity has your heart picking speed as you haven’t been this close to Jake before, his expensive perfume almost chokes you when someone pushes him again. Causing him to press you further against the wall. You’re starting to feel suffocated. It only ever becomes worse when you grow hyperaware of his chest raising and falling against your back, his breath fans against your exposed neck and you shiver.

“You good, bunny?” Jake murmurs into the back of your head, his other arm coming up to splay his hand flat against the wall, successfully caging you in. his voice is low yet soft. Softer than any other time he had spoken to you before, tenderly causing tingles to linger at the top of your spine.

Jake had never spoken to you gently before if he’s not blunt and cold. He is teasing you with harmless insults and perhaps that’s why his tone has specifically broke you that day. It blazed a trail down your being, nestling in the middle of your stomach and travelling down right to your core.

When was the last time someone had spoken to you this softly?

You can’t come up with a good enough answer. Not to the question swimming around in your fizzy mind or the one Jake threw at you. you’re flickering, wobbling on this thin line between you and your eyes are following the trail of veins on his hands. They look so strong that your brain melts and turns into mush, the only thought arising on top of everything is that he could fuck you right now and you would definitely let him.

Maybe that’s why when your lips separate a phantom of a whimper escapes you, ringing in Jake’s ears when you start squirming, pushing your lower half back against him in the process. You aren’t sure if you’re trying to get away or closer to him.

“What are you doing?” He groans, pushing further into you to stop your constant movement. The sound sends another unwanted shudder through your body.

“I can’t breathe.” You hang your head, disgrace marring your cheeks in red at the way you catch yourself in a lie. The way your eyes have glazed over, and there’s a haze turning your mind into a jumbled mess. forcing you into the lust you have been denying the existence of for days now.

You can’t breathe.

And it’s not because of this cage you found yourself trapped in, it’s because of him.

“we’re almost there.” His voice is almost like a distance dangled comfort, offered by some pitying god that you refuse to take despite your sinful thoughts and so you grow quiet, equally terrified at acknowledging the fact you want him.

You feel like a stumbling mess all the way home, with wobbly legs and a quivering heart that somehow always manages to make itself your worst enemy. You don’t allow yourself the pleasure to scour the thoughts swirling in your mind for answers. Instead, you mellow out into the tingling electricity that had lingered on your back. As if his scent seared itself onto you, you end up touching yourself in the middle of your bed. myriad of visions invades your mind. They’re mostly of Jake’s hands and intensive stare. A glorious fire that takes you so high up and only when you’re down do you realize;

Oh, you’re so fucked.

“yn,” jake’s annoyed voice pulls you right back into the current situation you’re in. he arches a brow at you and you blink, breaking yourself out of a daze.

Daydreaming about your boss who happens to be in front of you right now is a different kind of fucked. One that you didn’t have in your bingo card for this year.

“Right. Protein bar I’m on it.” You free your wrist from his grip easily, he falls back into his seat with suspicion mixed with irritation that has him biting on his lower lip. A habit that you grew to hate so quickly. It has you straightening your back and moving away in a stiff manner. As if you’re an alien that just learned how to walk on human ground.

“You okay?” Jay asks you when you manage to faceplant right into his chest as soon as you’re out of the room, a breath of a chuckle escapes him at your expression.

You only give him an equally stiff thumbs up, a blush so deeply red spreads across your cheeks like an exposure to all the corrupted fantasies that found your brain and made it their home. It’s so ridiculous you don’t even welcome them so why are they taking over you as if you are a dried up branch flourishing back to life with none other than your desire for Jake Sim out of all people.

You will not allow it.

You catch yourself in another lie when afternoon rolls around. Passing by you with a blur drenched in misfortunate mishaps. It all begins with an inexplainable discussion you end up in with one of the staff members, you don’t recognize her so you think she must be new. She saw you next to Jake earlier that morning and apparently thought it was funny to joke about you and him fucking and perhaps it hit way too close to him. Perhaps because it is something you’ve been thinking about for nights upon nights but it had angered you so much. To the point where you decide to give her a piece of your mind when you run into her in the bathroom.

Despite the smell of actual shit surrounding you, your anger doesn’t subside. In fact, it only grows bigger when the girl rolls her eyes at you and walks away in the middle of you talking. You screamed, hitting your hand against the wall.

And that’s how you ended up with a broken nail. A bandage that has a fucking bunny on it of all animals wrapped around your pinky and a scowl not nearly as cute plastered on your face. You are startled when the door of the dressing room opens, your stare flits across Jake’s figure that dawdles past you followed by Sunghoon. You sink further into the couch you’re sitting on. Annoyance pulling at you when your silence is interrupted.

“Oh, hey yn.” Sunghoon greets, notices your figure that is being drowned by a graying disappointment. Almost as deep as the lines forming between your brows.

“Hey,” you return drily.

Your eyes linger on Jake, and he catches them from across the room. They cut into you deeply, it has you splitting open, breaking like shattered glass and your only wish as you go down is to cut him back.

The longer your staring stretches the more you feel your blood started to bubble with something akin to anger. Running through your veins and becoming one with every other negative emotion that has nestled in you throughout the day. It makes up all of you, turning you into a hungry void that wants to swallow everything in sight. It only grows when you feel like you’re the only one who’s getting burned by this fire growing vastly fast between you two.

Jake’s façade never breaks, doused with indifference and feigned coldness. It’s in the way his pruriency for you is ferocious. Taking up every sense of his being, he finds it in the notes of your scent, vanilla, and cinnamon like you’ve stumbled out of a bakery. Sugary sweet and he’s never been a fan of dessert, yet he grows a sweet tooth just for the taste of you.

It’s in the way you’re infuriatingly confident. Carrying yourself with a loudness he’s sure he despises yet you manage to walk away with pockets full of his attention. The shape of your body capturing growing ounces of his interest day by day. Perhaps he’s just sexually frustrated, he hasn’t fucked anyone since Chaewon. And so, when he glances one too many times at your legs and when he’s staring at your breasts too long to be deemed discreet. He lets himself because he’s just taken by his sweeping frustration.

Because truth is he finds you insufferable, overly stubborn with a spark of determination in your gaze, yet his want is uninhibited, crawling to you with licks of temptation and he pretends to be stronger than any of it. That the way you laugh so loudly is enough exasperation for his lust to abate. He pretends that you being so pretty doesn’t matter as much, that the innocence clinging to the edges of your smile like you haven’t been tainted by the evil of the world is only a rarity he finds in you.

It pulls him right into you and yet away from all his logical thinking. He finds himself being thrown back and forth in the overwhelmingly profound walls of his brain.

He’s never met someone who irritates him as much as you do so how is it that he craves you this bad?

Jake’s hiding is deep-rooted and so you remain unaware of it all.

“yn can you hand me Jake’s shirt? It’s on the rack behind you.” Sunghoon speaks, words cutting into the pregnant silence that had spread around the room. It hangs heavy that you don’t ever hear him.

Your mind stolen with the wandering of your eyes, dipping to Jake’s hand clad in rings. They’re nothing sort of enticing and yet you find yourself transfixed, unable to process anything that’s going around you and unable to look away from him.

It’s tremendously inequitable how he looks like he ambled out of a painting carefully coming to life by a starstruck lover. It’s aggravating how he’s a sculptor’s approximation of a person. You’re sure he’s been sipping on angels’ tears in his past life because there’s no way for him to be real otherwise and even when the angel is walking towards you with so much force in his steps, his wings dripping with glittering gold covers the floor and a couple of broken hearts cling to his lashes, you hold your breath. It’s in the faint scars adoring the palm of his hands.

It’s so absurd how could it be possible for something so tarnished to hold onto so much beauty? How is he so captivatingly attractive?

When Jake leans over you, his body mere centimeters and your face is almost buried in his chest. Your heart pulses against your ribs, eyes widening in surprise.

“Focus bunny,” he says with a stern look in his eyes, pulling back and the shirt Sunghoon had asked for in his arms.

You’re unable to come up with something to say. Your mind a blank when Jake takes his shirt off. His skin comes to view like whiplash to your face and your heart sinks to your fucking ankle.

It has your cheeks heating up, you fumble with the end of your rope.

One slip, all it took was one slip and you’ve fallen.

“Can you leave us alone?” Jake’s voice breaks into your clouds of thoughts and you swallow. Standing up and with too much of shakiness in your legs, you head for the door.

“Not you bunny. Sunghoon leave.” The latter looks between you two, taking note of the tension that seems to follow you two. It’s fatuous yet Sunghoon complies.

“What’s with you?” He stands before you, arching a brow at you and you linger by the door. Toying with the hem of your skirt and avoiding his gaze. The same one that is dancing across your figure appetitively.

“What?” You don’t mean to snap at him, but you do and his face hardens enough to chip enamel.

“Don’t start giving me attitude now.”

You sigh, a breath of exhaustion as you try to regain some pieces of sanity that the lines on his abdomen stole. Your eyes lolling everywhere but him.

“Sorry I’m just having a bad day.”

“you’ve been having a bad day for the last two weeks?” he asks sarcastically, followed by a scoff that tugs at your anger so easily. Yet you keep quiet.

“Get your shit together yn. you’re only making this harder for everyone else.” He adds bitterly, scrutinizing your futile attempts at avoiding his eyes. maybe because you know he’s right that anger finally sinks its teeth in you, and you don’t resist it. Locking eyes with him with a newfound raising flame.

“It’s not like you’re making it any fucking easier for me.”

“Don’t cuss at me.”

“I’m not cussing at you.”

He pauses, his gaze flickers for a mere moment that it’s enough to have you slipping yet again. As if you have been standing on slippery glass all along, barely hanging on by his avoidance and a simple darkening of a shade is enough to weaken you. eluding the depths of your desire to the surface. The wall of tension builds alarmingly fast, it’s in the way Jake’s eyes follow your lips.

“My job isn’t to make anything easier for you. so, if you feel like it’s too much you can leave.”

“I’m not leaving.” Your voice wavers slightly, mimicking the buckling of your knees.

“Then take it.” You wither away in silent indignation, so intense it feels seared on you and it only grows, peeking over the now mountain of tension. So leaden, it only intensifies when Jake’s takes slow steps towards you. A playful glint has taken its claim in his eyes, like he had won a contest you didn’t agree to be a part of. When he’s close enough he brings attention to your lips with his index finger.

“And take care of this mouth too yeah?” like splashes of wine your cheeks grow red in color and Jake’s lips tilt upwards in a troublesome smirk “behave bunny.” His words are meaningless, a passing empty thought he throws right at your face and when you sputter for a response. Swaying with shaking hands to gather your discomposure that he abandons as he walks past you.

It’s a blunder, one that will have you mourning your dignity right after and yet like a fool who stumbled upon a dazzling cup filled with sparkling poison you drink up. The devil and angel are entangled with sin when the words tumble out your lips;

“You take care of it then,” you turn to look at him and he looks back with the same vigor spilling from his eyes, like a river running down the route of lust.

“If you hate it this much then take care of it.”

For an indeterminate amount of time, the two of you stay there, standing in silence on opposite sides, it stretches agonizingly slow that you almost feel an overly determined urge to melt onto the floor you’re standing on.

Your mind careens over your own words yet when Jake takes a tentative step towards you, his eyes search yours for crumbles – you hope are heavenly enough to have him breaking and you didn’t just offer yourself to refusal. You don’t evade it, instead you allow yourself a few seconds to savor the intoxicating tension.

No one has ever looked at you with this much want before and so you forget the ability to breath like tiny million sparkling stars are falling from the darkness of his eyes and right into in the lodge of your throat, so sharp and rigid and they’re bright, so bright it lights up your insides. Like lightness have found an abandoned cave –

And because Jake burns first, so frighteningly fast like melted candle wax. Your inside twist when his lips meet yours in desperation that emerges a gasp from you

- They fucking explode.

Your lips move against each other with famish, a thirst nestled so deep in both of you it can only be quenched by your kiss. His hand is on the curve of your jaw and yours form fists in the lines of his shirt. The pressure of his mouth upon yours renders your mind a foggy mess. So much so that when he moves you against the door, your back hitting it harshly you follow with no reluctance. Another pretty gasp escapes you at the impact and it gives his tongue access to your mouth.

A light moan falls from you, as the kiss deepens the bridges of your noses slide together and with a mind of their own his hands are like phantoms travelling over your body, palming your breasts over your shirt. your every sense becomes overwhelmed with his lips, his touch.

“Are you clean?” he pulls away briefly and you whine, eyes heavy lidded as they chase after his lips again. As if your cells need him to live as opposed to oxygen.

“What?”

“I’m going to fuck you so are you clean?”  you blink at him, the fog clearing up for a moment and you almost frown close enough to take offense if your underwear sticking to you with wetness isn’t growing annoying,

“I’m clean,” you murmur, almost doused in shame that you don’t get to linger in before he’s diving back into you. his lips finding yours with fervor and the air bleeds red with desire.

With his hands down your underwear, he lightly brushes to tease at the wetness. Lips quirking in something akin to egoistical pride. And your expression turns sour despite the incontrollable bucking of your hips against his unmoving fingers.

“How come you’re this wet already?” he’s imprinting the words upon your cheeks, leaning down to drop the same bruising kisses to the skin of your neck and collarbone, drawing a map of possible regrets.

“I’m horny and I haven’t been fucked in weeks what did you expect?” you sneer, and his chuckles vibrates against your neck.

When he goes back in to kiss you, you feel your cognitive facilities shut down. Your hands with a mind of their own travel across his body, in his hair like you’re running on a time ticking bomb, and you need to feel every inch of him before it explodes.

“Get on the couch.” He whispers against your lips.

“You don’t have enough stamina to do it standing up?” you tease, a playful quirk of your lips that has his eyes darkening. You’re not sure if it’s anger or lust.

“Unless you want me to leave you like this you better zip it.”

Once you’re on the couch, he clambers over you, and the kiss that follows is filthy, his hands work fast on freeing his cock from his slacks and your mouth is falling apart with an open silent whimper when he runs the head of his cock down your covered slit. You pant into his mouth, spit dripping down your chin and you arch into him with a new sense of need coloring your moans.

“Hurry,” you mumble against his lips, your embarrassment shows plainly on your face and Jake only smirks at you.

He wraps his fingers around the hem of your skirt and pushes it upwards, creating a halo of fabric around you. he slides your panties down your legs just enough to have your pussy on display for him. Jake’s eyes are feral and heavy as it trails over your figure, so intensely deep it has you squirming in your place. An uncontrollable need crawls over you mixing in with your frustration.

“Are you gonna fuck me like you said you would or are you gonna keep staring at me?” you huff, feeling your patience thinning.

His lips quirk upwards in flickers close to mockery as he smooths his hands over your legs, tad too gentle for your liking but when he’s looking up at you it’s not close to tender but rather like you had fallen right into the devil’s lap.

Just like he had planned all along.

He slowly sinks into your wetness, chuckling at how quickly your mouth falls open with a silent moan. He grinds into you, his own eyes falling shut at how your walls lock his cock inside of you and you’re more than grateful for that. Not wanting to be witnessed with a stupefied look on your face.

You want to – try to keep quiet as if a challenge had presented itself to you and you remain nothing but a too stubborn of a flower, refusing to be picked especially not by Jake Sim of all people and so you bite down on your lower lip. You almost taste the sweetness of victory on your lips and then it’s pulled so brutally away from you when the head of his cock hits that gummy spot and you convulse. Head falling back with a strangled moan.

“F-fuck-“ you clench around him and your hand scrambles for purchase in his locks, the other digging into the couch, the throbbing pain of your pinky long forgotten.

He falls forwards with a soft laugh, so melodic and unexpected it has your stomach twisting into knots you aren’t sure are nerves or pleasure. He buries his face in your neck as he sloppily drives his hips deeper into you and his lips draw a lazy map of salvia rather than actual kisses on the skin of your neck. It leads him right to your lips; the eye contact you hate so much transpires again. Your bodies keen in flawless harmony, it’s absolutely sinful.

“You were so talkative earlier, what happened bunny?” he whispers on top of your mouth, close enough to behold the want in your eyes. you attempt to glare at him and yet it melts right with your dignity with the touch of his fingers on your jaw, stopping you from looking away as he fucks into you harder “are you gonna thank me for taking care of it?” open mouthed kisses dot across your jawbone before lining his lips over yours, your chin in his hold as he thrusts into you.

When he leans back, you’re growing delirious, barely gripping into your remaining sanity when he smirks at you “come on say it.” He mumbles half-heartedly and you shake your head with a whimper, it echoes throughout his mind and ignites a bigger fire within. Curling into an ungodly soundtrack of sweaty bodies and the hankering to break you.

“Say thank you Jake for giving me your cock,” he mocks, his voice like devilish thorns against your skin and you push at his shoulder with a grunt.

“F-fuck you.” He doesn’t falter at the wavering of your voice, so debilitated compared to the way you glare at him and yet it turns him on even more.

He starts to relentlessly fuck into you at a faster pace, the thrusts going from slow and deep to tight and pointed. It has your eyes rolling back into your head, mouth falling open with moans and whines- anything that could be good enough to indicate how he feels inside of you, how your cunt grips onto him in desperation for more, more, more.

You’re so dilapidated from pleasure that you’re struggling to breathe, struggling to control your sounds anymore. They spill over endlessly, and Jake knows they’ll be tattooed into his brain just like the first time he had heard music in his life. They will haunt him just like the clicks of a piano, so sweet, sugary sweet and addicting. He feels so good, inside of you, around you that tears start stinging in your eyes.

“Fuck- fuck Jake I’m coming oh- “you blabber.

“Shut the fuck up.” He presses his hand flat to your mouth, hushing you and pressing you further onto the couch and your eyes soften as you swallow, entranced by him. Your walls tighten around him and his tight grip falters but remains. His face is drenched in perspiration and so much want for you.

With the oxygen stolen from your lungs. Your breaths are quick and heaving and your body shakes in ecstasy as you feel your orgasm approaches quickly, building so intensely with the way his movements become jerky. Shooting your hand to your clit you work yourself up and further into the gates of iniquity. your whole body becomes taut, and you rock into your hands and chase after his cock. watching you melt under him is something Jake will be viciously proud of for a couple of days to come.

So much so that it’s almost an impossible challenge for him to pull out of you when his own high approaches dangerously overwhelming. With labored breaths, his eyes glued to your heaving figure. He spits on his hand and starts pumping his pulsating cock. His other hand scrambling for the tissues on the table and he sends himself over the edge. Your eyes are the only thing that he needs to fall.

As soon as the fog of lust clears up you feel a shift in the air. The gold and sparkles disappearing and washed away along with all the bent-up anger. Leaving behind nothing but a sliver of dullness and awkwardness that clings to your limbs. Jake moves from on top of you with a grimace. You watch him move to tidy himself up in almost blissful yet holding on by an ambiguous edge that tug at your heart painfully. When he looks at you, you don’t know why you almost feel like you want to disappear.

“Jay has been asking for you. Fix your hair before leaving I don’t want him knowing about this.”

Oh. Oh. It shouldn’t be a surprise to you that he doesn’t want anyone to know about this and you do realize how inappropriate all of this is and yet you still stumble into a bitter feeling. An old picture starts burning in your mind, the same one of you falling into desperate repetition of a prayer to someday be good enough to keep and not a sparkling piece of art that holds no actual value.

“I’m gonna leave first.” Jake speaks into your growing silence and the click of the door is the only indication of him leaving.

You don’t know how long you stay there on the couch. A couple of hundred emotions take over you, guilt, anger, regret, and shame. So much shame and all it took was one slip to throw you into the maze of agony so familiar yet so frigid and cold.

When you walk out of the room you run into Jay right away like a mockery of the devil you’re growing sick of playing with. There’s a knowing smirk spreading across his face as he studies you, one that you don’t get to see because you’re so busy looking anywhere else.

“You and Jake had a good talk? Sorted out the tension?”

“Yeah, all good.” You mumble almost inaudible as you push past him with a burning face.

Jake watches the interaction between you two with intense attention. His eyes betray him as they follow your figure almost religiously. and when Jay strolls to him with a shit-eating smile plastered across his face., Jake groans sinking down into his chair and hoping to somehow vanish.

“Don’t even fucking start,”

“I didn’t even say anything.” Jay retorts with a laugh.

“I know what you’re gonna say, and I don’t want to hear it.”

Jake’s hiding is deep-rooted and so you remain unaware of it all.

Once you’re one step in your apartment the sounds of all the too familiar trio have your shoulders deflating even further if possible. Despite your immense love for them the need for a quiet night after the hectic day you had is bigger. You can kiss it goodbye now.

“Hey,” Niki greets you as soon as your figure is in the living room, the other two sitting next to him on the couch turn from the tv to you as well and you force a smile upon your face despites the aching in your body,

“Hey guys,”

“Heeseung is helping me get to plat.” Jungwon tells you, eyes brimming with joy. It has your chest enveloping with warmth. a breath of fresh air like you’ve been choking all day. On your thoughts and on lingering stares

“Slay.” You ruffle his hair as you pass by him and into the kitchen, gravitating towards a glass of wine that you’re sure your soul needs.

“Are you okay?” Niki asks, eyes dancing across your features. Your mind clutters full of the earlier events and you down your glass of wine in a moment.

“I’m perfect.” You reply, pouring yourself another glass and running away from the concern lacing Niki’s eyes “I’m gonna take a bath and call it a day. Don’t trash my apartment.” You call out to them as you start heading towards your room.

“Without me?” Heeseung says from behind you, you ignore him and the only thing you hear before closing your door is the impact of Niki’s hand hitting his head and a loud ‘Ouch’ following.

The darkness of your room welcomes you, in a rather unexpected coldness that has you wondering what home really is. It’s all so stupid, and yet you wonder why you feel like a hole had opened right under you. staring at your glass of wine you feel like the air, not free but hallow.

One slip was all it took.

→ taglist : @slutforsjy @wonwoos-wineparty @nxzz-skz @piripurora @vousty

@realrintaro @slut4hee @chartrucewhore @iveivory @hearteyesforseungsung

@jooniesbears-blog @hee4lifer @pretty-bluntz @babrieeee @mandoscyare

@stayyyyyyyyyyyy21 @softieluvsyou @seunghancore @chaewonshoney

@chaeyunloveeee @beommii @fuxktaekook @antonsgirlfriend

@direxila @rockyhedgehog @nessas-archive @lukeys-giggle

@arikazu @pochamocharoll @chlodavids

[4evermutated]

bayverse! April headcanons

because i hate the way megan fox was sexualised in the movies i wanna give her more personality than just being hot and smart 😭 i heart u bayverse April

- she thrifts! not just expensive 'real vintage' designer labels but everything, she also finds clothes than can be easily upcycled and tweaked for the boys. Her signature color is yellow so you KNOW she has rare and whimsical pieces she collects in her wardrobe

- speaking of which; she sews! Mikey often rips or breaks his stuff (like shoes and shirts) and hes always giving her bits and pieces to fix up. As much as Donnie is a tech wiz, Aprils expertise lies in the art of DIY! shes tried to teach Don how to sew but ironically its one of the few things he cant crack

- shes a stem nut, OBVIOUSLY! her and Don bond the most over new technology and the advancement of science and digital technology. her and Don made her a pc from scratch and its one of her most precious memories

- April has a really bad sweet tooth, when the guys get pizza for the rare nights in, she's reaching for Mikeys candy stash for sure (she makes sure to replenish it with all their shared faves)

- her favourite candy is anything sour! but actually sour, we're talking throat numbingly sour to the point where at the end of the bag all you taste is blood 💀 it freaks everyone out lmao

- she has a masters in journalism and a degree social sciences, its so important to her to give visibility to the stories rarely talked about. Shes very dedicated to her profession and genuinely gets mad that all vern cares about is attention from fans and the camera

- April is also very passionate about nutrition and fitness! she goes total big sister mode when the turtles neglect their protein intake especially with how big and physically demanding their jobs are. a few times she's tried to teach Leo how to cook for his brothers and hes just about learned how to not burn eggs on toast but shell be damned if she starts cooking for 4 6ft men 😭 respectfully not her job!

- she's incredibly protective of her friends, whoever they may be, even Vern. she doesn't take lightly to disrespect and she WILL trash talk you to silence if you make anyone she cares about feel less than

- when she was younger she wanted to be a zoologist or anthropologist. Like her dad, she's always had a love for science and research, but she loved animals so much as a kid and it crushed her when she realised her father was experimenting on animals

- she feels personally responsible for the turtles and Splinter, she visits them atleast once a night, whether on face time or in person. the fact that they feel theyll never be accepted in society weighs heavy on her heart. she wishes things were different

- she knows Mikey has a crush on her, but she doesn't know how to let him down gently and honestly doesn't wanna open that can of worms, so she just pretends she doesn't notice his very desperate flirting

- sleeper build april. SLEEPER BUILD APRIL. people treat her like shes fragile just because she's beautiful but shes also incredibly strong with amazing endurance. i mean hello?! SHE CAN RUN IN HEELS. thats badass

- she loves game nights w the turtles and Casey, she loves playing MK and her go-to character is ofc Mileena (goated and no im not biased)

- she may or may not have a dedicated collection of disguises for super sleuthing and recon. shes very proud of it and will give a tour if asked

- she wants to learn ninjitsu, just doesn't know if she should ask or wait to be asked. she feels awkward and sometimes wonders if its not her place, even though in reality Splinter would be happy to train someone so dedicated to justice.

- her favourite drink is banana protein smoothie!! the lair has a smoothie just for her 😭 they have to hide it from Mikey before he gets back into his liquid pizza phase again

- she likes hero comics/shows (like 2012 leo!). Naruto was her childhood and its kinda beautifully ironic that she's like a ninja by proxy now

thats all for now! its been like 5 years since ive written headcanons so sorry if the format is boring, lmk if you want more headcanons! ok bai

[cod-dump]

Price: Shit- We’re late! We have to skip breakfast

Soap: Damn

Gaz: Good thing I have protein bars-

Ghost, a bottomless pit that’s never sated: Captain, I know I joke about being a big bad guy that’s heartless but you know how actually fragile my heart is. Please consider that at this moment as you deny me my morning bacon

Soap & Gaz:

Price: I’ll grab some sandwiches from the café next to the meeting place!

Ghost: PROMISE ME

Price: SIMON WE DON’T HAVE TIME-

[impala-dreamer]

The Fragile Heart

A Stort Story

~ After returning home from filming a movie in Europe, Jensen fights to control himself and Y/N keep safe. Unfortunately, lust is hard to fight and hunger even more so…~ 

Jensen Ackles x F!Reader

5,002 Words

NSFW, Vampire!AU, Relationship Angst, Mentions of Past Infidelity, Smut, Blood, Dark Romance, Death

Written for @jacklesversebingo "Bad Things" by Jace Everett was the prompt and inspiration

JacklesBingo Masterlist

Impala-Dreamer’s Masterlist  ~  Patreon  ~ Published Works

He came back wrong.

She couldn't explain it, but he was different. Usually overly affectionate and sweet, her husband shied away from her touch, snapped at tiny offenses, and hid his thoughts away.

No matter what she did, she couldn't reach him.

No matter how tight her grip, she couldn't hold on.

He slept most of the day, complaining of a migraine that he couldn’t shake. She’d bring him meds and water, a snack now and then, but he’d wave her away with a grunt and push his head deeper beneath the pillow.

At night, he seemed better, but still off. He’d disappear into the home gym most of the night, refusing supper for protein shakes and lifting more weight than she thought was safe.

It seemed he could barely stay in the same room with her for long, and as the days ticked by, Y/N grew more worried.

When she tried to confront him and plead for an explanation, a placation, anything- he’d sigh and turn away, unable to give her what she needed.

She was losing him.

Jensen could barely stand it. The entire time he was away, all he wanted was to come home, but being there was painful. Seeing her was tearing him in half. The guilt of what had happened and the fear of what he could do was too much to handle.

He knew he shouldn’t hide, knew she’d listen and be by his side, but he couldn’t risk it. He couldn’t risk losing control and taking away the one thing he truly loved, the only thing in the world that he needed: her.

Each day was worse than the last. Y/N looked at him with eyes filled with pain when once there was only love. She sat alone at the dining table, picking at food her stomach was too upset to take. The blanket wrapped tight around her while the television watched her was no comfort, the books she held lay in her lap ignored and unread.

After a while, she stopped trying to talk to him. She no longer reached for his hand when he walked by or met his gaze with adoring eyes.

He was losing her.

Just before sunset that night, Jensen was slumped in his favorite chair by the living room window. The curtain was drawn shut and he held his head in one hand as if the very act of being there was painful.

He looked up when she came in, green eyes glowing slightly in the lamplight. For a second, he forgot everything. For a blessed moment, they were happy and whole.

He smiled softly. “Hey, baby.”

She stared at him before answering, confused by the greeting after so much silence. “Hey.” She crossed her arms over her chest, putting up invisible defenses. “I’m not cooking tonight,” she said simply while looking down at her socked feet. “If you get hungry, there’s some yogurt in the fridge or that leftover chicken from the other night.”

Jensen pulled in a heavy breath. “You’re not hungry?”

“No.”

Y/N turned to leave but he stopped her.

“Wait…”

In a blur, he jumped up from the chair and touched her shoulder. She spun and found him closer than he’d been in weeks. Tears sparkled in her eyes and she held her breath, needing him to make a move.

He fell into her gaze. “Y/N, I-”

She looked so tired and lost that his chest ached. On instinct he lifted his right hand, ready to cradle her cheek like he’d done a thousand times before. When his touch landed, Y/N flinched and he watched a shiver work its way through her body.

“Jensen, you’re freezing.”

Immediately, he snapped his hand closed and pulled away, backing up a step. “Sorry, I’m… it’s cold in here.”

She moved to follow him, closing the space between them with a long step. “Baby-” Concern flooded her voice and Jensen’s jaw clenched tight. “Are you sick? Is- is that what’s been going on? I can call the doctor or we can go in the morning or-”

“No!”

Y/N gasped and backed up, more hurt than scared.

His shoulders fell. “I’m sorry. I’m not sick- I’m just-”

“What?”

He turned away, but she grabbed his wrist, keeping him there, refusing to let him storm off again. Her fingers burned into his skin. She was so warm, so soft. His breath quickened and his heart raced.

“Y/N, don’t do this.”

She held him tighter. “Me? I’m not doing anything but trying to get you to talk to me!”

He could feel her pulse through her grip, like tiny beats in the tip of each finger. He tried not to focus on it, but it was too hard to ignore.

“Why won’t you tell me what’s going on?” Her voice cracked as emotion took over. “Please. You’ve been home for almost a month and I have no idea what happened in Paris; no clue why you’re acting like this. Please. Talk to me!”

The more emotion she felt, the harder her blood flowed and Jensen closed his eyes, letting the sound permeate his being. He could almost see it pumping through her body; feel each tiny blood cell sweeping through her veins. He locked his jaw shut and took a breath to steady himself.

It was pointless.

He was close to breaking.

“Jensen!”

When he wouldn’t answer, Y/N stepped in front of him, forcing him to at least look at her. His mind was reeling, his flesh tingling with dangerous lust.

“Please talk to me…”

She dropped his wrist and placed her hand on his chest. Her fingers curled into the soft cotton of his gray t-shirt and his hands began to shake. He wanted to grab her, slam her up against the wall, and-

“No.”

Y/N’s lip trembled. “No?”

“No, it’s not- I didn’t mean-”

Slowly, her hand fell to her side. Y/N looked up, choking back a flood of tears. Her voice dropped to a whisper as she swallowed them down. “Why won’t you talk to me? I miss you.”

Her words wrapped around him, pushing caution away.

“I miss you too, Y/N.” Jensen reached for her cheek and this time she didn’t flinch. He slid his fingers behind her ear and back, bracing the nape of her neck in his big hand. “So fucking much…” He urged her chin upwards and pulled her body flush against his. “You have no idea…”

Shivering but desperate, she fell into him and let her lips gently part. “Please…”

Her breath washed over him like sunshine, warm and inviting. He bent to kiss her lips, instantly remembering their secret rhythm and how perfectly they fit together. Y/N exhaled into him and he sucked it down, kissing her deeper and wrapping his thick arms around her. She moaned as he ran his hand down her spine; shuddered when he sucked at her bottom lip.

“Fuck, baby… I need you.”

Jensen growled as her whisper echoed in his head. He needed her just as badly and wanted her even more. His tongue swept over hers and he heard her heart tick faster. Her breasts pressed firm against his chest; her fingers teased upwards to hook around his collar.

“Jensen…”

An ache spread through him and fire sparked deep in his gut. His fingers tensed on her flesh, dimpling her softness as he held on. His lips danced across her cheek and jaw as his knee pushed between her thighs.

Y/N tugged a hand through the long hair that curled around his ear and moaned as his kiss fell against her throat.

He shut his eyes, feeling the fire grow more intense. His mouth ran dry, his muscles tightened, his senses heightened. He could smell how wet she was as the arousal dripped from her cunt. He could feel her temperature rise half a degree as the blood rushed to the surface of her skin. Her heart beat loudly in his ears and Jensen felt his control slipping.

He sucked at her throat, licked hard at her thrumming pulse, each beat driving him farther away from safety and into the darkness that waited for them both.

His upper lip twitched as the monster struggled to break free and Jensen panicked. Immediately, he jumped back and turned away, covering his deformed mouth with his hand and closing his senses to her presence.

Y/N stumbled in place, her balance shattered when he released his hold. “Jensen?”

He cowered by the window with his back to the light. “I can’t.”

Her heart ached. He could hear it slowing.

“You can’t? You can’t what? Kiss me?”

He shook his head.

“Hold me?”

His chin dropped and he held his hands over his ears, desperate to block the sadness in her voice and the percussion of her heart.

“Listen to me? Look at me?” Tears fell. Her stomach churned. “Look at me!”

Afraid to move, he stood frozen like a coward. Silent, hurting, and terrified to lose her.

She wanted to beat her fists into the wall, slap him, scream in his face- anything to get him to talk, but she knew it wouldn’t matter.

She took her broken heart to bed and shut the door without another word.

He walked the city like he had every night since he’d been home. Keeping to the side streets, he hid himself away in the alleyways and the empty lots, all the places the light rarely touched. If anyone recognized him, they didn’t show it. This late at night he was just another lonely wayfarer in fancy boots and designer jeans. A mess of a man who had no place to go, nothing to do but linger in the dark.

With every step he thought about their kiss and how closely he’d skirted danger.

Each blink brought her face into view, with broken bones and bruised flesh, pale skin and lifeless eyes.

It was a warning he couldn’t ignore, but he was too in love to back down.

Y/N lay in the dark counting the minutes until morning. Twice, she’d dozed off, but a buzzing mind kept true sleep at bay. She tossed and turned, twisted the blanket around her body, cradled the pillow in her arms.

There was no comfort without him there.

The empty bed was a painful reminder of love slipping away.

When he came in, the air went out. Y/N jolted up from her pillow, gasping as if the oxygen was being sucked from the room. Every tiny hair stood on end and the electrical pulses shooting through her body told her to run.

“It’s just me.”

Jensen’s voice calmed her panic but did little to ease the hurt. He stood in the bedroom doorway, his face lit only by the faint stream of light peeking through the curtains. He looked ghostly, his face pale and gaunt.

“You scared me,” she told him, sitting up against the padded headboard. “Where’d you go?”

“Nowhere. Just out.” He shifted his stance and shoved his hands deep into his pockets. “Did I wake you?”

Y/N shook her head and hugged her arms across her chest. “Haven’t been sleeping lately.”

Jensen hung his head. “I’m sorry.”

She sighed and looked away. “Don’t-”

“No. I am.”

He took a step inside and reflex tightened her body. She flinched and he froze in place.

“I’m sorry,” he said again. “About all of it. Everything. For tonight, for not… talking to you. For leaving you alone all this time.”

Drawing her knees up, Y/N hid her face in her hands. “You don’t have to, Jensen. I’m… I’m so tired.”

Hurt and worry knotted his gut. Another step pulled him closer to the bed, but he kept a safe distance.

“I need to tell you what happened, I want to. I just don’t know if-”

“If I’ll forgive you?”

He looked down at the carpet and found the faint outline of the red wine stain still stuck in the fibers from a night of drunken sex three years ago. He shouldn’t have been able to see it in the dark but it was clear, every strand of thread, every fleck of stain visible now.

“If you’ll… understand.”

Y/N exhaled a shaking breath and closed her eyes. She didn’t want to cry anymore. She didn’t want to fight.

“Was it another woman?” she asked, dreading the answer.

Another.

The feeling she put into that single word shook him deep.

Years ago, he’d fucked up. There had been another woman, a guest on set that he’d gotten too close to. It was only a week, but it had nearly shattered their marriage.

He swore he’d never go there again, and he wasn’t sure that he even had this time, but she needed to know. She deserved to know. Everything.

“It wasn’t like that,” he said softly, “but yes.”

He could almost hear the crack in her heart. The fragile heart that had forgiven him years ago. The heart that had stood by him through everything life had thrown his way. The heart that always welcomed him home. The heart he was forever breaking.

Jensen sat at the very foot of the bed and hunched over, resting his forearms on his knees. He clasped his hands and closed his eyes, trying to figure out where and how to start.

Y/N watched him struggle but turned away when he looked back. She refused to meet his gaze, afraid she’d crumble into more pieces than they could ever pick up.

“I’m listening.”

He took a deep breath.

“I can’t even explain what happened-”

“Try.”

He swallowed hard. “The shoot was… crazy. I’ve had rough gigs before but this took a lot out of me. This was…” He felt her eyes on him, heard her steady breath, smelled her trepidation. “Anyway. There was a lot of drinking. Too much.”

Y/N sighed. “Go on.”

“Couple of us found a bar- just a local place. There was nothing special about it. The booze was cheap and…”

“I get it,” she snapped. “You were drunk. And then?”

“I was just minding my own business and-” He pressed his nails into the palm of his left hand as memory washed over him. He could smell the stale beer, taste the bourbon, feel the cool air. “I don’t know where she came from, she just appeared at my side and… we started talking.”

Y/N held her breath and her tongue, giving him the time he needed to get it out. Anger swirled in her stomach but she did her best to keep it from boiling over.

“I can’t even remember about what, really. It was all a blur. Like, an actual blur. After a while I could barely see anything in the room but her, as if the background had gone out of focus. I felt stoned. Slow. Like… I was drugged.”

Concern pushed anger aside and Y/N leaned forward, kicking her knees down and to the side. “Drugged?”

“I just felt… strange.”

“Baby- what happened?”

He looked up with tears rimming his emerald eyes. “I honestly don’t know. I have gone over it a million times but I just… don’t… know. One minute we were talking and… I know she touched my face. I know we left the bar… and then-”

Y/N braced herself with a deep breath that steeled her soul.

Jensen looked away again, shamed and confused. “I woke up in bed. My bed.”

She clenched her jaw, waiting for the worst of it.

“Alone.”

“Alone?” Her breath released and she shook her head. “I thought-”

He laughed bitterly and stood up. “So did I. I thought- fuck, Jensen, you did it again. You fucked up- but… It was so much worse.”

“Worse? How could it be worse?”

Jensen turned away and rubbed his neck. He felt the marks she’d left behind, invisible yet there, haunting him eternally.

“You won’t understand.”

Y/N swung her feet off the side of the bed and gripped the sheets for strength. “Try me.”

He didn’t know how to say it. It made no sense. It all seemed like a crazy nightmare. How could she understand?

She grit her teeth. “Jensen!”

Startled, he turned back. “She drank from me.”

Y/N sat up straight and a confused smile tickled her lips. “What?”

“She drank from me,” he said again, his voice low and calm. “Drank my blood, Y/N. And… I drank hers. At least, I think I did. I don’t really remember.”

The tickle spread down into her chest and a laugh bubbled up. “What?”

“I said you wouldn’t understand.”

Y/N laughed louder, shocked at the audacity of his lie. “Wait. So… instead of just admitting you went off and fucked some stranger in Paris, you’re trying to tell me that a vampire picked you up at a bar?” She stood up as her attitude and anger swelled. “That’s what you’re going with? A vampire? What, did your buddy Kripke write this excuse for you?”

The rage in her voice made his skin prickle. He cringed and spun away. “Don’t.”

Again, she laughed. It stung him deep.

“Oh, I fucking will!” Enraged, she grabbed his upper arm and tried to spin him back to face her. “Are you seriously gonna stand there and tell me a fucking vampire story right now? After everything?”

He would not be moved, standing like a statue next to her.

“Y/N, please-”

“A vampire!” Another yank on his arm did nothing to appease her. “No. I want you to look at me in my face and tell me that you believe some French bitch sucked your fucking blood and turned you into a vampire.”

His head was spinning. The heat of her touch burned into his soul. His muscles ached; his bones felt like they were about to splinter. He held his breath, trying to stay calm, to fight the urge to snap back.

“Look at me!”

She was screaming and he was silently boiling inside.

“Fucking look at me! "Goddamnit, Jensen!”

Desperate, Y/N shoved him hard and the dam broke.

Jensen spun around and showed her the truth.

His eyes, once a comforting forest of green, were rimmed in crimson and seething with danger. His plump lips, so cracked yet soft, kissable and beautiful, were pulled tightly back, revealing a pair of dagger-like fangs and a hungry tongue.

Terror petrified her limbs and locked her in place, eyes wide and staring. Jensen’s body trembled there, his chest heaving with panting breaths; his hands balled into strong fists to keep from grabbing her.

Every second was agony for him. He could hear her blood coursing like a raging river, see her pupils contract and expand in such miniscule points no human eye could track. He wanted her to understand. He wanted her help, needed her comfort. He wanted to rip her chest open and devour everything inside.

Y/N took a deep breath and the panic subsided. She lifted a hand to his cheek without hesitation or fear.

“Jen…”

He closed his eyes and let her touch ground him. He felt the pain ease as he leaned into her palm.

“Baby…”

Her whisper broke through everything and the monster calmed. He opened his eyes and hot tears streamed down his face.

Y/N took him in her arms, holding him tight as he crumbled.

Silently, they moved back to the bed and she eased him onto the pillow, never lifting her touch from his skin.

“I do not understand this,” she said gently, leaning on an elbow to look down at him. “But we will figure this out. I’m not gonna give up on you, Jensen. Not ever.”

He shook his head. “What is there to figure out? I’m cursed. One night of drunken bullshit and I’m a fucking monster.”

“You’re not.”

“I am.” He sat up quickly, knocking her hand away. “I’ve done things.”

Y/N bit her lip, struggling to stay strong for him and contain her own tears.

“Every night while you’re in here alone- I’m… I’m out there…” He looked to the window across the room and the pale light illuminated his face. “Hurting people.”

Y/N cringed and hugged herself tight, trying not to let her imagination take off.

“I’m sure you can’t help it,” she whispered.

He looked back over his shoulder. “I can’t. I can’t fucking stop it from happening. I get this pain in my gut. This hunger… I can’t stop.”

Every story she’d read, movie she’d seen- the thought that it was all real was driving her mad, and yet- there he was, living it.

“Maybe there’s a cure or something. Like… well, I don’t know exactly but if-”

“No.”

Jensen dropped his head into his hands and his shoulders began to shake. He exhaled a trembling breath and Y/N shifted closer, laying her hands on him once more. She pulled him close and he melted into her, soothed by her warmth.

“I’m so sorry.”

She kissed his forehead, smoothed back his hair. “You don’t have to say that.”

“I am.”

She kissed him again and he lifted his chin, meeting her gaze.

“I am so fucking sorry.”

Y/N nodded and raked her hand through his hair, curled her fingers around his ear. “We’ll get through this. We will.”

He clung to her, praying she was right. “How?”

“Together.”

Jensen closed his eyes and pressed his cheek to her chest. Her heartbeat was so steady in his ear, her fingers felt like heaven running across his scalp. Slowly, he lifted his lips and she met him halfway.

The kiss was slow and familiar, like he was finally coming back home.

She pressed harder and his lust stirred. He licked at her lips and breathed her in, needing everything she could give.

Y/N fell back against the pillows and he followed, dropping down to cover her with his full weight. Her lungs emptied and he breathed life back into her as his hand slid down her side. Her lips parted for his tongue and she moaned when he lifted up an inch, just high enough to trace her hipbone with his cool fingertips.

She gripped his collar as his hand snuck into her thin panties, rocked her hips as his palm pressed up against her cunt.

“Fuck…”

He slipped his middle finger inside and she shivered at the cold.

“Sorry.”

She shook her head and licked into his mouth. “Don’t stop…”

Wetness trickled down onto his wrist and he lifted his thumb to stroke her clit, expertly winding her up the way only he knew how. Her breath quickened, her temperature rose. He could feel it like never before: every fiber of her body tightening as the pleasure increased.

Jensen stared at her face, marveling at the subtle changes. Blood pulsed in her cheeks, her lips fell slack, her eyes went blurry, all under his gaze.

“God, you’re beautiful,” he breathed. It was like seeing her for the first time and truly knowing her. “I love you.”

A smile lit her face and she blinked up at him, worried but grateful he was back. “I love you…”

He felt the snap, the precise second her orgasm struck and he sat back to watch her body writhe with bliss. It was pure magic the way she moved, the way her body opened up even more for him.

“Need you,” she moaned, reaching out for him.

Jensen rushed to shed his clothing, kicking his boots off and rolling onto his back to yank his jeans away. Naked and pale, he returned to her, shifting his thighs between hers and spreading her knees wide.

He hesitated but she relieved his worry, setting her hands on his chest and nodding gently.

“Please…”

Falling forward, he set one hand by her head and eased his cock inside with the other. His jaw dropped as her body squeezed around him, warm and tight and absolutely made for him.

Y/N shivered but held on, snaking her hand up to rest at the nape of his neck. Moans filled the room and tight-lipped, loving curses passed between them.

Lost in her, Jensen sensed the hunger rising again. His muscles twitched with the need and he shook his head, refusing it to surface.

Sensing his struggle, Y/N dug her fingers gently into his neck and urged him down. She kissed him hard and then turned her head to the side, stretching her throat for him.

His entire being seemed to focus on the thick vein pulsing in her neck, calling to him, begging to be torn apart.

He held back.

“No.”

Y/N ached into him. “Do it. I want to feel it. Please.”

With a low growl, he kissed the crook of her neck and jerked his hips. She gasped and her heart rate soared. Another kiss, another hard snap of his hips. Y/N trembled beneath him and whimpered as his tongue swept over her pulse.

“Please…”

The desire was rampant, but love held him back. “What if… What if I can’t stop?”

Y/N squeezed his neck and ran her hand up to cradle the back of his head, pulling him closer.

“I trust you.”

The heat of her, the wetness, the soft flesh made his thirst peak, and Jensen sank his teeth into her throat.

The first splash of life against his tongue sent a jolt of pleasure through him so intense that he came, flooding her cunt as her blood filled his mouth.

“God…” Y/N’s consciousness wavered. She felt light, as if her body was floating in his arms, safe and loved forever. Every gentle pull of his lips drew more sense of self from her mind until she was a simple cloud of pleasure set to dissipate into the night sky. “Jensen…”

He felt her heart straining and her warmth fading as she shuddered with ecstasy. Intoxicated, he drank deeper, pulling her essence into himself and moaning with every drop he swallowed.

“Jensen…”

Her eyes refused to focus, rolling uncontrollably in her skull. Her lungs burned as the blood ceased to return. Her legs went numb, her hand fell limp onto the mattress.

“Jen-”

Wrapped in bliss, he bit down again, loving the way her flesh yielded to him. He licked at each wound, and savored every flavor. The salt on her skin, the faint remains of her night cream. The blood, so rich and full of love, pouring into every inch of him. He smiled against her throat. “Love you… Love you… Love you…”

He didn’t hear the moment her heart stopped, but he felt it like a strong force shoving him in the chest. He jolted back and blinked into the darkness. His body was tingling, alive and full of energy. For the first time in weeks he felt true warmth spread through him and he laughed.

“Fuck, baby, that was incredible.” He licked her taste from his lips and moaned. “So fucking good!” He stretched hard, moving his muscles and grinning. “You good, baby?”

A tiny breath fell from her lips and Jensen’s lightness faded.

“Y/N?”

Her cheek was frigid and pale, as if she’d siphoned the cold from his soul.

“Y/N.”

He shook her but she wouldn’t wake.

“Y/N!”

In a panic, Jensen dug his nails into his own neck, ripping a deep gash that sprayed across her face. The blood ran down and he took her weak body in his arms, pressed her cold lips to the wound.

“Come on, baby… Don’t leave me….”

The blood gushed down her chin, soaked into her skin, forever stained the mattress.

“Y/N, please…”

A stream found its way between her lips and a surge of electricity sparked on her tongue. Jensen felt the pull as she accepted his blood, sucking hard at his throat.

“That’s it, baby…” He smoothed the hair back from her face. “That’s it. Fuck…”

He sat by the window and watched her for hours. She lay as if dead, her body unresponsive and posed where he’d left her. There was no breath to lift her chest, no beating heart to echo in his ears.

The night slowly faded and Jensen closed the curtains against the light. He wiped the tears from his cheek and climbed into bed beside her, draping his arm across her middle. He rested his head on her chest and closed his eyes.

One last night together and then eternity without her.

“I love you, Y/N. I’m sorry.”

The day came and went with Jensen sleeping fitfully by her side. At sunset, he heard a gentle thump and then another. He opened his eyes and held his breath, listening for more.

“Come on, baby…”

A louder thud gave him hope. Jensen sat up and gripped her shoulders tight.

“Open your eyes, Y/N. Please.”

The sun finally hit the horizon and Y/N sucked in a full, gasping breath. Her eyes flew open and her body tensed, every cell filling with preternatural power as the cursed blood flowed through her.

Jensen backed away as she sat up, her eyes wide with wonder as she looked at her husband. The darkness was no match for her vision and she could see every detail in his face, every pale freckle, every line, every lash clear and vivid.

“Jensen?”

He rushed back to her side and took her hand, lifting it to his lips.

“I’m so sorry, baby. I thought- I mean- I killed you…”

Smiling gently, she pulled him close. She licked deep into his mouth and his head spun.

Y/N was as cold as he was now, but it wasn’t painful. It felt right; he felt complete.

“How do you feel?”

New life pulsed through her, tingling and alluring. Y/N took a deep breath and exhaled against his lips.

“Hungry…”

2024 Forever Tags (Always Open! Send an Ask!)@alwaystiredandconfused @babysimpala @beardburnsupersoldiers @chenshemesh1 @cosicas-cuquis @deans-baby-momma @deanwinchesterswitch @feelmyroarrrr @foxyjwls007 @hobby27 @impalaspixie @jackles010378 @kazsrm67 @k-slla @leigh70 @lunaroserites @lyarr24 @nancymcl @nix-rose @peachy-vans @pizzagirlxnsfwx @rachiem4-blog @rosecentury @sexyvixen7 @suckitands33 @the-wounded-healer05

[deadguywalkin]

sam+seb+alex hcs,

cw nsfw at the end, eds, disorders, and the likes

mdni with this post because i will be dropping some extra nsfw stuff here , or just don’t read/interact with the last bit

sambastian:

they baby each other WAAAYY too much. randomly holding each other’s faces and cooing at each other and getting sad, peppering each other’s faces.

i stole this from someone but they probably cried the first time they had sex

so so sappy. they’re just so lovesick for each other. 

sam is bigger than him but insists on sitting in his lap

in the middle of the night, waking up ‘baby… baby..’ ‘..what?’ ‘nothing. i just love you.’

comfortable silence. sam always feels a need to talk and entertain people, but he feels at peace with sebastian since he already tells him everything and doesn’t have much to say beyond that.

sebalex:

‘__kg of protein…… i need to eat you’

alex thinks he’s the cutest thing ever. sebastian thinks alex needs to fuck off

‘you’re so babygirl’ ‘shut the fuck up’

alex is still scared of sebastian. he’s still always going to be slightly scared of him

they don’t understand each other, but it gives them so much more to love learning more and more about stuff they’ve never heard of before

hugs from behind and whispering into ears

sebastian has trouble remembering to eat, alex always seems to have something on hand and remind him

samalex

they’re SO boyfriends who constantly hype each other up

*sobbing* ‘i love you.. bro’ *tears in his eyes* ‘broski.. i love you too.’

just so much praising each other and telling each other how awesome they are

so much cuteness aggression. they’re just squeezing and crushing each other constsntly

sam is in every single comment section of every one of alex’s instagram posts gatekeeping him. ‘EVERYONR LOOK AWAY THATS MY MAN!!!!’

sam/alex + sebastian

hugging him from behind and kissing him

carrying him just to piss him off.

sebastian steals their clothes. but they let him because he looks really cozy

pinning him down and biting him. forcefeeding him affection and kisses, nomnomnomnom

constantly grabbing at his thighs or waist

he’s so tired and unmotivated, has depressive episodes from time to time. they like helping him out.

he just likes sitting in their laps while doing whatever and letting the bigger guys engulf him

has to do all of the thinking for them. they always shut their brain offs when they’re around sebastian so he has to make sure they’re not walking into poles

‘sorry, they were dropped on the head as babies.’ he says while apologizing to whoever sam or alex are talking to

literally cannot handle how horny sam and alex are. they are insane

sam/sebastian + alex

always sitting in his lap. he’s so comfy

‘ah.. long day of work…… i’m exhausted. time to shove my face in this himbo’s titties and exhale loudly’

reassuring him quietly with soft pecks to his face

they hold his bicep when walking with him

they steal his clothes a LOT and he would love to retaliate but unfortunately he would rip their clothes 

they’re so gentle with him. everyone thinks he’s tough but they know how fragile and sweet he is and they just think he’s so baby

alex has some kind of body dysmorphia and gym related eating disorder. they always remind him to eat normally and not body check so much, checking in on his meals a lot and making sure he’s not eating some weird gym rat concoction

doesn’t get their music / music taste but is happy to listen anyways

alex/sebastian + sam

sam comes home and is immediately like ‘mmfffjfghgf….’, dropping his head on their thighs and they immediately know to start playing with his hair, no questions asked

constantly yapping to them. cannot shut his mouth. they like the background noise though

token white boy, very confused when they shower him with spanish and korean pet names and compliments

>> 

🏈: ay, mi querido, sam💗

🦇: 내 아기 🖤

☀️: .. uh-huh

needs so much attention and love. very high maintenance boyfriend

he’s just the sweetest ever. he loves holding them and listening to whatever’s bothering them. he’s the type to focus on everyone else’s problems as he ignores his own

adhd boy. he needs help staying on task with whatever he needs to work on. 

plays his old acoustic while close to them, singing to them. they love it

completely nsfw hcs beyond this point !!!!!

samalex have definitely researched how to properly suck tdick

sebalex ‘missionary so we can continue arguing’

alex’s abs are just. they’re just feral over them

sam has a perfect ass, no kidding. skater boys and their beautiful asses….

so much ass grabbing. these three cannot keep their hands off of each other

sam was definitely alex’s first cis guy

sebastian with his eyeliner running down his cheeks ………yes

have to mention again.. sam is SO whiney and cracky, he’s so vocal

alex is low and mildly vocal but can have a twinge of sounding desperate at times

sambastian fingering/mutual masturbation…. while holding each others faces lovingly and cooing at each other (based off of crispy’s trans seb art)…… save me…………

samalex:

[mushroomates]

gimli headcanons:

likes doing laundry. finds it soothing

history nerd!! loves reading old tombs/biographies of his ancestors

is incredibly intelligent. beats frodo in chess. would beat gandalf but gandalf cheats. has been in a stalemate with aragorn for two and a half years.

well mannered but chooses to forgo his politeness to make a point. especially around elves.

does NOT like horses. not just riding them, which is canon, but actually dislikes the animal itself. the reasons why include (but are not limited to) :

he does not like being not on ground. he does not have a fear of heights so much as a fear of… feet not on ground. as evidenced by refusal to jump, treehouses, and well, horses

he does not like their faces. they are long and have eyes on the side like prey. gimli thinks this is deceiving as horses are very large and can kick in someone’s skull. not his skull.

gimli believes that in a one on one match with a horse, he could easily win. he has thought of several, very specific, scenarios of this and has a detailed plan of attack should this situation occur.

they so easily turned against their home for an evil overlord (read: sauron stole all the black horses from rohan) and therefore cannot be trusted. as a rule, anything that willing you let you ride it cannot be trusted. they can’t be satisfied with this life. they are plotting something.

believes he would be great at drums. it’s just hitting things hard and he’s pretty strong.

ok, another thing about horses: they are fragile to a ridiculous extent. you breath wrong and it breaks. they have bad bones and bad blood flow in their legs, and their legs are all that they’re used for. he doesn’t understand why humans invested so much time into horses when they’re genetically bad at what they are meant to do. he’d feel bad for the horses if they weren’t so awful.

drinks coffee, not tea

takes great with the up keeping of his gear. he sharpens his axes, polishes his boots, shines his armor and waxes his mustache. that’s not gear, but he takes great pride in looking groomed and caring for his belongings.

has an axe for every occasion. battle axe? do you want throwing or slashing. a day on the town? have you seen this intricately carved masterpiece that also is a weapon? digging a hole? PICKAXE. cutting a cake? how about an axe???

hates the rain because it ruins his hair and beard. also loves the rain because it ruins legolas’s hair and clothes.

will eat anything. has a great tolerance for spice. contrary to popular belief, dwarves are not shy of seasoning but are very cautious around other races in fear of poisoning their friends

will also eat some rocks. salty is his favorite (halite, hanksite, glauberite) but also likes to add chunks of chalcanthite to his food for a slightly sweet yet metalic flavor. this is also slightly (SLIGHTLY) poisonous as evidenced by sharing his trail mix with boromir

also calls dirt the “local seasoning”

will taste dirt to try and get a feeling for the land. this tells him the acidity, weather, possible wildlife, and also pisses off legolas

actaully genuinely likes the taste of dirt. (note: if you desire to eat clay/dirt that is a symptom of iron deficiency. for gimli, he eats spoonfuls of the stuff like their supplements because as a kid it was fed to him like multivitamins)

OK SO HEAR ME OUT: lack of sunlight can cause really low hemoglobin and ferritin (a blood protein that contains iron) sooo being constantly in dark caves can cause some forms of iron deficiency. because dwarves are conscious of their young, dwarf children often grow up not often being in direct sunlight.

the solution? dirt. dirt contains iron and other tasty minerals that are good for the body. charcoal has natural antioxidants. so does clay. am i saying that momma gimli (unnamed) fed her son ash and clumps of dirt? yes. also bits of broken pottery. it’s good of the immune system.

fr tho clay/dirt/charcoal are the dwarven multivitamins. you have a tummy-ache? here, have a rock. i truly believe this was scientifically proven by dwarves and only FOR dwarves (plz do not eat dirt)

fuckin loves mushrooms. has a mushroom log at home. whenever dwarves find some fungai in a cave they go feral

likes dogs. thinks it’s great that they dig holes. thinks it’s fantastic that the bury things in holes. absolutes loves when they get muddy, and then shake off all water and dirt all over you.

when he came back home with the name lockbearer, a lot of the dwarves thought it was really cool and he has some sort of elven puzzle that requires a code to unlock something. imagine their surprise when he rocks up and is like: no, even better. HAIRS. three of them.

enjoys making mudpies- made them as a kid with his cousins, (mostly with rock slurry) and continues to, even even as an adult.

made them on the fellowship with the hobbits. taught them all about the best types of dirt and the water-to-soil- ratio needed.

while cutting up slices of his pie, he offered one to boromir, who in good nature, took it, clearly thinking it was just part of the bit.

poor boromir was locked in a stalemate after gimli cut his own slice, and began eating it.

to his credit, boromir did brave a few bites, but had to stop once he nearly had a mouthful of maggots

“protein”

gimli is like crazy good at hair. can braid quickly and efficiently in elaborate styles

picked up eleven hair style techniques in lorien (quicker than legolas) and was forced to relay them to the elf through twine as there is no way he’s letting grubby elf fingers to touch his glorious mane that’s been decades in the making

would ask for a drink “on the rocks” and get slightly upset if it did not come back with actual rocks

[bethanythebogwitch]

Wet Beast Wednesday: leatherback sea turtle

When most people think of big turtles they think of the giant tortoises of the Galapagos. Those may be the biggest land turtles., but in the water, life can get bigger. Much like how whales get bigger than any land mammal, the viscous and buoyant properties of water helping counteract gravity lets sea turtles get bigger than their land counterparts. This Wet Beast Wednesday I'm discussing the largest of all turtles, the mighty leatherback.

(Image: a leatherback sea turtle swimming just below the ocean's surface. It is a very large turtle with ridges running down its shell and its front and hind legs modified into large, paddle-like flippers. It is dark gray all over, with white spots. End ID)

Leatherback sea turtles (Dermochelys coriacea) is not only the largest turtle, it's the heaviest of all living reptiles that aren't crocodilians. Adults average 1.8-2.2 m (6-7.2 ft) in length and 250-700 kg (550-1,540) lbs, with some variation in size based on region. Leatherbacks are the only living members of the family Dermochelyidae while the other 6 living species are all in the family Cheloniidae. This gives leatherbacks multiple anatomical differences from other sea turtles. One of these differences gives the leatherbacks their common names. Instead of a bony shell made of scutes, their shells are made of thick, oily and leathery skin that is embedded with small bony growths called osteoderms. The thick skin and osteoderms provide protection and allow pressure to distribute across the shell, making the shells highly resistant to being bitten trhough and highly resistant to cracking. Seven prominent ridges run down the length of the shell. The shape of the shell makes leatherbacks the most hydrodynamic of all sea turtles. The shell's shape and structure provides it with a high resistance to pressure, useful as leatherbacks dive deeper than any other sea turtle.

(Image: a leatherback sea turtle seen from the front with its mouth open. The head has a beak instead of teeth and the interior of the mouth is fleshy and pink. End ID)

Leatherback sea turtles are powerful swimmers. Their powerful front flipper provide propulsion while the rear flippers are used for steering. The flippers can grow up to 2.7 m (8.9 ft) long, making them the largest of all sea turtles both in overall size and in relation to body size. Those flippers make the leatherback the fastest non-bird reptile, able to reach 35.3 km/h (21.9 mph), though they usually swim much slower. Of all the reptiles to be the fastest, I would never have guessed it would be a turtle. Leatherback beaks are fragile and not suited for biting through anything but soft-bodied animals, so they swallow most of their food whole. The throat is lined with backwards-facing spines that prevent prey from swimming back up the throat. While leatherbacks have scaly hides like other reptiles, they are the only reptile whose scales do not contain the structural protein beta-keratin.

(Image: the mouth of a leatherback being held open to reveal the interior. It is pink and fleshy and lined with backwards-pointing spikes. End ID)

Unlike most (non-bird) reptiles, leatherbacks maintain a core body temperature higher than the surrounding environment. It was formerly believed that this endothermy was established through an increased metabolism, though more recent measurements have establised that leatherbacks do not have a metabolic rate much higher than would be expected for a turtle of their size. It is now thought that body heat is maintained through heavy muscle activity. Leatherbacks are almost always actively swimming and spend at little as 0.1% of their day resting. By constantly swimming, their muscles generate heat. This body heat is then retained through a countercurrent heat exchange system that warms blood before it reaches the core and a thick layer of fat, allowing leatherbacks to inhabit water much colder than any other sea turtle.

(Image: a leatherback sea turtle on the beach, presumably a mother laying eggs. Multiple children are watching it and an adult is roping off the area around it to keep it safe. End ID)

Leatherback sea turtles are found worldwide and have the largest range of any turtle. Thanks to their high body heat, leatherbacks can live in waters as far north as Alaska and as far south as Aotearoa/New Zealand. Scientists have observed three genetically distinct populations, one in the Atlantic ocean and one each in the east and west Pacific Ocean. In addition, there are two other proposed populations, one in the Indian Ocean that is understudied and one in the South China Sea that is nearing extinction. They spend most of their lives in the open ocean, hunting prey. The primary prey of the leatherback sea turtle is jellyfish and they have to eat a lot of them to maintain their size. Other food sources include siphonophores, salps and pyrosomes, small fish, small crustaceans, and seagrass and seaweed. Leatherbacks play an important role in their environments by keeping jellyfish populations under control. Excessive jellyfish can overfeed on the plankton population, removing food sources for small animals and killing larval fish. A lot of jellyfish follow diel vertical migration; moving to deep water during the day and shallow water at night. Leatherbacks are adapted to follow their food and are among the deepest diving of all air-breathing marine animals, having been observed diving over 1,000 m (3281 ft) deep. Only sperm whales and beaked whales are known to dive deeper. Their high body temperature and shell structure allows leatherbacks to survive the frigid temperature and immense pressure of the deep sea. Dives can last up to 70 minutes, though most last from 3 - 8 minutes.

(Image: a leatherback sea turtle underwater, aiming downwards. End ID)

Leatherbacks migrate vast distances between their cold feeding grounds and the warm, tropical waters where they mate. Females may release pheromones into the water to attract males. Once a male find a female, he will attempt to woo her through head and flipper movements, nuzzling, and biting. When the female accepts, the two mate while in the water and then depart. Females must haul out of the water and onto shore to lay their eggs. Like other sea turtles, they tend to return to the beach of their birth, though they may also choose nearby beaches. Their preferred beaches have soft sand and a low angle of entry that face deep water. They also prefer beaches that have forests or dunes on the edge. Females lay eggs at night to avoid predators and overheating, but they have poor night vision. Thus, they prefer the forests and dunes to give a clear distinction between the moonlit ocean and the darkness at the edge of the beach. That way they can find they way onto shore by following the shadows and back to sea by following the light. Eggs must be laid above the high tide line and are buried in the sand. Females will mate multiple times each mating season and can lay a new clutch of eggs for each mating. An average clutch has 110 eggs, half of which will hatch. Eggs hatch in 60-70 days and the temperature of the sand around them determines whether the young will develop into males or females. In addition, eggs laid in colder sand usually develop into larger and more robust juveniles. Eggs hatch in groups during night and the hatchlings will follow moonlight reflected off of the water to find the ocean. During the trip to the water, many hatchlings will be lost to predation by opportunistic land predators and seabirds. Those who reach the water have a chance at survival, but are still preyed upon by squid, large fish, and sharks. Only a very few hatchlings will live long enough to reach adulthood.

(Image: a leatherback laying eggs. She has dug out a pit behind her and is releasing small, spherical, white eggs into it. End ID)

Leatherback sea turtles are classified as vulnerable to extinction by the IUCN, with some populations being more endangered than others. In particular, the east Pacific, west Pacific, southwest Indian, and southwest Atlantic subpopulations are listed as critically endangered, with the rest being either endangered or data deficient. Human activity is a major threat to the turtles. Leatherbacks can be caught as bycatch in nets or lines, leading to drowning and they are too large for some turtle safety mechanisms (like escape hatches on nets) to work. Pollution is also a major problem as floating plastic bags can be mistaken for jellyfish and swallowed. These bags can then obstruct the digestive system, ultimately killing the turtle. Another major problem is light pollution. Because hatchlings follow the brightest lights to reach the ocean, they can end up following artificial light instead of moonlight and end up moving away from the ocean instead of toward it. While adults are rarely caught for food, eggs are heavily harvested in southeast Asia and the Caribbean, where they are seen as delicacies or medicinal. It has been suggested that the population collapse in the South China Sea is largely due to overharvesting eggs for use in cuisine. Multiple countries around the world have given the turtles legal protection and local government and private agencies are aiding in turtle conservation through methods like helping juveniles reach the sea, artificial incubation of eggs, and raising awareness through ecotourism.

(Image: a hatchling leatherback. It is a miniature version of an adult and is climbing over other eggs, many of which are in the process of hatching. End ID)

[a-book-of-creatures]

It’s been nagging at me for a while, so I’m going to try to put together my thoughts on the Quetzalcoatlus sequence in Prehistoric Planet 2. In the grand scheme of things it’s tiny, insignificant, and I loved Prehistoric Planet, but I’m not going to turn down the opportunity to talk at length about scavenging birds.

(Spoilers (?) for Prehistoric Planet 2 ahead. Go watch it!)

I’m talking about the part where a Tyrannosaurus is driven off from an Alamosaurus carcass (presumably carrion and not killed by the tyrannosaur). The tyrannosaur is expressly stated to be concerned about losing an eye to those Whopping Big Beaks. The pterosaurs aggressively fly over it a few times and honk angrily until the tyrannosaur walks away in Shameful Defeat, leaving the carcass to the pterosaurian pterrors.

And that confused me.

Before I go on, I want to point out that this is not a Who Would Win discussion, I’m not going to argue for or against one or another. Not going to discuss if Tyrannosaurus should really have won because of the massive weight advantage and lack of fragile bones/wings, or if the big landlubber had it coming and the numbers and aerial advantage was too much. I’m not arguing about Quetzalcoatlus being scary or not either (it’s scary as all hell).

No, the issue I had was with the beaks.

This is the Quetzalcoatlus as it appears in the show.

Impressive beak, isn’t it?

But it’s not the beak of a flesh tearer.

Let’s back up a bit. Birds that eat meat by tearing it into manageable chunks typically evolve sharp, hooked beaks to make up for the lack of teeth. Like this eagle for instance.

Majestic. They make the cutest sounds too. Look up golden eagle sounds, don’t believe the red-tailed hawk propaganda.

Raptor bills look intimidating, but they’re not there for killing. They’re cutlery. The talons do all the work, and then the beak tears up the meat into delicious gobbets of protein.

Even shrikes get in on the act. They don’t have killer feet, so they use their ripping bills to impale prey and tear at it.

Aw, look at it, it thinks it’s accipitrids.

The Quetzalcoatlus’ bill, though, doesn’t have that hook. It doesn’t look like the bill of a bird that dismembers its food. The closest thing I could think of to compare it with was stork bills. Specifically the marabou.

Ol’ pickaxe-for-a-face. This is the beak of an animal that stabs smaller prey and swallows them whole with minimum processing.

But a bill this long and pointed, turns out, is good for stabbing but not for tearing meat. Marabous are scavengers, but they won’t tear apart a carcass on their own. The “[b]ill [is] not well designed for dismembering carcasses, so [it] normally steals scraps from vultures or snatches up morsels that are dropped” (del Hoyo, Elliott, and Sargatal, 1992).

As you can see, vultures retained the hallmark accipitrid steak knife face, and are much better at Ripping and Tearing. This one (the lappet-faced vulture) generally goes first, being big and strong enough to Rip and Tear tough hide and get to the fleshy interior.

In fact, “[d]espite its huge bill, the [marabou] stork can rarely dominate a carcass and normally stands by the much more numerous vultures and nips in from time to time to snatch morsels which are dropped by others, though Tawny Eagles (Aquila rapax) in turn often steal food from the stork. The bill is not apparently very effective for cutting up meat and dismemberment is normally carried out quite simply by pulling” (del Hoyo, Elliott, and Sargatal, 1992). And if marabous have trouble with the average carcass, I wouldn’t imagine Quetzalcoatlus would fare much better with a titanosaur, which presumably has rather thick skin too.

One big happy family. That’s a much smaller carcass being shared (with the obligatory squabbling) by a whole bunch of dinosaurs. Neither vultures nor marabou are trying to monopolize it.

So... I don’t see why the big stork pterosaurs would chase away a perfectly good meat processor. I know everyone wants to see Big Prehistoric Animals Fighting With Lethal Intent, and everyone wants to see Tyrannosaurus Getting Knocked Down A Peg By The New Hotness, but I think it would have been a more interesting and believable scene - not to mention more in keeping with Prehistoric Planet’s attempt to be as scientifically believable as possible - if the pterosaurs acted like marabous the size of giraffes, both them and the tyrannosaur keeping a respectful distance of each other, and snapping up bits of meat left behind. And maybe the pterosaurs pulling the dinosaur’s tail for good measure, the way ravens bully eagles.

But it would make for a much less exciting scene. Who wants to watch a bunch of scavengers milling around a carcass and honking at each other as they jockey for the best morsels and settling their differences in ways that involve as little risk as possible? I mean, I do, but I don’t assume the average viewer does.

And that concludes my altogether far too long opinion on a single scene from a great series. Of course, I’m not a paleontologist and never will be, I’m only approaching this with what I know about birds, so please feel free to let me know if there’s any details of Quetzalcoatlus anatomy that do in fact suggest it could rip and tear!

References

del Hoyo, J.; Elliott, A.; and Sargatal, J. eds. (1992) Handbook of the Birds of the World, Vol. 1. Lynx Edicions, Barcelona.