#patriarchy chicken

[chasm-side]

And if a dude does walk into you regardless (usually because he's paying attention to his friends and not looking where he's going / noticing your murder face - why yes, I spend a lot of time on a university campus), then your best response is to immediately say "bro" in a vaguely bewildered and disappointed way. You have to be fast about it - do it before he says anything that could set the tone. "Bro" isn't confrontational enough to start a fight, but it perfectly conveys your general disapproval of his... everything. 10/10 I've never had anyone respond with aggression, and sometimes they've actually apologized to me.

[erainbowd]

Bring Those Knees In, Boys!

What am I supposed to do when a dude presses his knee into my knee at the theatre? I have an idea but you probably won't like it. #knees #theatre #theater #audience

TRIGGER WARNING: This piece will devolve into (imaginary) violence and (imaginary) men will be the victims. Also, some strong language. * A few times in the last few months, I’ve gone to the theatre and found I was seated next to a young man. How young, I’m not sure – maybe 20s or 30s? But every time, I find myself contending with their young man knees pressing into mine. It drives me…

[bredforloyalty]

shaved chests are actually so fucked up. put some hair back on that beast

[malkaviian]

how to realize i've had enough academically speaking today: i started to think about rafael and luca's domestic life, in case they somehow meet and get together after rafael's divorce.

[cynicalclassicist]

Yeh, that idealised trad stuff just shows how little these people really know about it. They clearly have no idea what it is actually like.

[kerubimcrepin]

LIVEBLOG: Wakfu Season 4, Episode 4 [PART 2]

I wonder how long he's been standing there. Did he come an hour early? 20 minutes early? Just standing there, doing nothing...

Dios mio... la creatura!

Something very weird happened with the Eni queen/leader. In s2, her cape and hands were like this because she was sitting, in this season — it's just part of her design. Did nobody check this stuff? Am I going insane thinking this is an error? Did she look bad when her cape was down? What the fuck is happening?

Once again, something very silly is happening with Sufokia, if they have an empress and a king. My headcanon to fix it is "the king is a consort-king" or something.

(*sobs in Ankama, or, really, 89% of all media, not understanding that whoever marries the ruler of the nation is a [insert title]-consort, and does not have as much political power or the right of succession* *Hysterically convulses in "99% of all Queens were Queen-consorts, and the title itself, by default, usually means a consort. For this reason, female rulers (rare non-consort Queens who came to throne due to lack of male princes) typically named their husbands "Princes" and not "Kings", because the title king always implies a higher degree of power than a queen; therefore, it might be reasonable to assume, that in this fantasy setting, a Ruling Empress's husband might be called a king for this reason* *Foams at mouth because Ankama just forgot they mentioed Sufokia having a king and I'm trying to cope. badly*)

Also since I'm on this tangent already, YES, this means that Sadida rules of throne succession are:

1. extremely easy for outsiders to abuse (say what you will, but "the spouse inherits the throne" is a BADDD rule to combat conquest by foreign nations, there's a reason it was children or blood-relatives of the ruler, besides patriarchy/divine right of kings/whatever — the spouse is an outsider. All it takes is a princess, who is Wonderful at poisoning, being married off to a foreign nation and whoopsie-daisy, their country is now Her country, and therefore her Family's country),

2. it's unrealistic,

3. probably just bad writing for the sake of drama.

If you're curious why I know all this shit.......... I have a blorbo in a different fandom, and his entire thing is that he was married into a royal family and then tortured by his queen wife in a sort of gender-bent Henry VIII arrangement (except he was kept alive against his will and there was no divorce or church splits). God bless that blorbo for making me learn.

These Huppermages were repurposed from the movie concept art, btw.

I find it quite interesting, that Joris has the authority to be present here...

My personal theory/headcanon is that he is their mediator, and they just call him to their meetings so that, instead of yelling at each other and declaring wars, they can talk to him (and therefore, yell only at him and declare no wars).

Ugh, once again, I am not entirely fond of the English subs. First the translation error about the brotherhood of forgotten/tofu, and now they are making Joris say this spring chicken thing...

It doesn't fit his character and reads weird. Just leave it as "I'm not that young", like in the original. It's more fitting for Joris to speak in negative sentences ("I am not young") than in affirmative ones ("I am old") because he is not fond of stating direct facts about himself and his life... besides the fact that he's standing in front of multiple world leaders.

[kicks my legs cutely thinking about the fact that Joris, older than every king and queen in this place, and fully convinced of his excellence and wisdom and heroism, has been forced to bow down to them for his entire life despite hating at 90% of them for their political decision] I love his commitment to being the protagonist of an 18th century Russian novel about being doomed by the narrative.

Also, kinda wild. You'd think that during Ogrest's chaos they'd— actually I think everyone was too dead to hold meetings during that, nvm.

I wonder what they would do, if the maker of the eyes wouldn't reply. Just stand there? Or is this speech more of a formality — something he always says, in the lead-up to the meeting?

(I am once again reminding you, this blog is LITERALLY about overthinking crepinjurgen lore! Ankama gave no shit while writing this. I'm just doing this for fun.)

He's so unimpressed. Probably still trying to gauge what the fuck is going on.

THE LITTLE SMILE— he's trying to suppress it so hard in the first screenshot here. He's probably glad that Yugo seems to be in good spirits about what's happening, even if he himself is still quite worried.

His expression here is a beautiful mix of "PLEASE DON'T FUCK THIS UP" and "it is a canon event, I cannot intervene"

Literally, Joris's expressions at this moment should be analyzed frame by frame. You can feel the desperation. He now understands that there is a high possibility they are fucked. Because his bestie (who is always right) is an impulsive 20-something year old boy who knows nothing about politics or what people can do, and his mom is a god, and the leaders of the world aren't going to like whatever the fuck is going on, and he KNOWS what they might do, and what might happen, and oh god oh fuck oh god oh fuck—

"Yugo :) perhaps you shuoild :) um. :) ease them into it. :).... :("

He's trying to keep smiling, so hard. It's crazy.

Joris has lived through the huppermage genocide. He knows people don't need that much of a reason to begin killing. He understands precisely just how fragile the position that Yugo and his people are in. He understands his own place in the pecking order, too — he isn't going to act like Yugo's friend if these people are watching.

And neither Yugo, not any other Eliatrope is able to understand this. There are cruelties in this world that they are fundamentally unable to grasp without having truly been seeped in it before.

Like, what is he even to do here, to make Yugo understand how bad the situation is. All he can do is stand there looking haunted, while receiving unprecedented amounts of psychic damage.

If I was Joris at this point, I would simply pull out a flask of whiskey and a cigarette. The political situation has now gone completely unfixable. There is no going back, now that she has said these two lines.

Someone native to the World of Twelve and old enough to understand politics would know how bad this sounds. But to her, these are good things. Of course they are, since she knows what is good and what isn't, and everyone in her world has always accepted those things as good.

Basically: the conflict between WoT and Eliatropes is that a nation of people from a world of teletubbies-level conflict, — with no bigotry or nations or poverty or hunger or theft or inequality, or ulterior motives, — has been added to a "game of thrones" type society with no explanation. And now they are all forced to try and understand one another.

If I was Joris at this moment, I would simply shoot myself in the temple with a gun. If things were bad before, they are horrible now. She is talking to world leaders as her children. It might have been alright even with Eliatropes, but these people aren't Eliatropes.

DO I EVEN NEED TO COMMENT ON HOW BAD THIS IS? IN A WORLD WHERE COLONIALISM, RACISM, SUBJUGATION, AND SLAVERY ARE REAL? IS SHE ON CRACK?

I would give anythign to see Joris's expressions as she's saying these things. I think he should be trembling. Staring vacantly into space.

To someone from a world of violence, a world with "no violence" seems like a world where violence is hidden, and enacted to stop them from voicing their disagreement with the status quo.

Tot has described this as a sort of conflict between the modern world approaches to society — and named China and America as examples of what he was inspired by, while writing Eliatrope.

I will not get into detail on my feelings on it (China is often extremely criticized in the west for things every country in the world does due to racism)

But this might point us towards the fact that the world of Eliatropes wasn't as free of conflict as the show portrays it to be, and it was, in fact, Just A Society, with all that entails. In which case, things get morally morally gray... might explain why, in the earlier drafts of the season, she was meant to be the main antagonist — and why it was decided against.

(Is that maybe why Qilby is so embittered — his experiences were silenced, and he was made to suck it up, only confiding in Shinonome? She does constantly shut up Yugo and Qilby, not letting them speak up about their grudges against each other to keep the peace— [I am quickly silenced by tangent police])

[marie-swriting]

Let's Go Together - Stiles Stilinski

Drabble Masterlist

Summary : You and Stiles do a horror movie night and you later regret it when you hear a weird noise.

Warnings : mention of horror movies, feeling scared, happy ending, maybe some grammatical mistakes as English isn't my first language, tell me if you see some or if I missed any warnings.

Word count : 848

French version

Prompt : "Please tell me that was the wind." from this prompt list made by @the-moon-dust-writings

The title “The Nun” appears on Stiles’ computer and with the bowl of popcorn next to you, you start watching the third horror movie of the evening. Like the last ones, you’re not really afraid. You jumped at certain moments but nothing too bad. However, once the closing credits are rolling, you feel fear taking over your body as you think back to the several stories you’ve just watched. Yet, you don’t show anything to Stiles, too proud to admit it. He doesn’t seem scared so you don’t want to chicken out or he’ll tease you until the day you’ll die.

Tired by your horror movie night, Stiles puts down his computer before turning off the light. Cuddling together, you’re both ready to fall asleep. At least, Stiles is. Your eyes are wide open, your senses on high alert in case there’s a threat of any kind. You try to reassure yourself by telling you it’s not real. It doesn’t work. You turn around from Stiles and try to find a better position to sleep in, maybe it’ll help you. Alas, once again, you’re still awake. You sigh and turn again.

“Can’t sleep?” Stiles asks, startling you as you thought he was sleeping.

“No, I can’t find a good position.”

“Me neither.”

You growl in frustration. You get closer to Stiles again when there’s a sudden noise. You look at each other, completely panicked. 

“Please tell me that was the wind.” you whisper.

“Yeah, it probably was.” he reassures you but there’s another sound.

“What was that? Go check!”

“What? Why me?” Stiles retorts, appalled as he turns on the light.

“Because it’s your house.”

“So what? You should go.”

“Why should I?” you question him, shocked.

“Aren’t you the one who always says to kill the patriarchy you have to destroy gender norms? In this kind of situation, the man usually goes, so we’re switching. Go check what it is.” he exclaims, trying to get you out of the bed.

“I swear, you men fight for equality only when it advantages you! Come on, Stiles, go downstairs. You have a baseball bat!” you try to convince him.

“I can totally give it to you.”

“Your dad is the sheriff. You know more about safety.”

“That doesn’t mean anything.”

“Stiles, if I die because of a demon, I’ll come back to haunt you.”

“Y/N, demons don’t exist.” Stiles contradicts, failing to hide his fear.

“Yeah and we said the same about werewolves! And, if you’re so sure about it, go check.”

“I’m not moving from my bedroom.” he protests and you roll your eyes.

“You know what? Let’s go together. Take your baseball bat.”

You get out of bed, completely afraid. Stiles takes his makeshift weapon and looks at you, waiting for instructions.

“Go first, I’m following you.”

“Why should I go first?”

“If you really love me, you’ll sacrifice yourself to save me.” you affirm with a big smile.

Stiles stares at you with a deadpan look before rolling his eyes. You lightly chuckle before kissing his cheek.

“I’m joking, you know very well I’d never sacrifice you.” you add more seriously. “Come on, you have the weapon and I’m right behind you, don’t worry.”

Stiles sighs before opening the door while you grip on his pyjama t-shirt - no matter how stupid it sounds, it reassures you. At the top of the stairs, you notice lights coming from the kitchen, proving there’s a stranger. Your panic increases and you mentally say your last prayer as you walk down the last stairs. Stiles makes a sign to not make any sound. You’re about to enter the kitchen but you let go of a shriek when, by surprise, the person appears in front of you. The stranger puts his hand on his chest, lecturing Stiles. Opening your eyes - you didn’t even notice you had closed them - you only see Noah in front of you with a desperate look on his face.

“What the hell are you two doing?”

“We-”

“Well, actually-”

Stiles and you stutter for a few seconds before Stiles casually replying : 

“We were just trying to scare you.”

“Scare me? It’s four in the morning, you should be sleeping.”

“Well, I totally agree, we should, I mean, our joke clearly didn’t work, anyway.”

“Yeah, whatever. I’m gonna go to sleep and you should too.” Noah says before taking a step. “By the way, Stiles, your baseball bat isn’t a weapon.” he adds, looking at his son up and down.

You wait for Noah to be in his bedroom before breathing normally again. You stay silent for a second, feeling completely stupid.

“You seriously didn’t remember your dad was coming home right now?” you reprimand him.

“Oh, so it’s going to be my fault now?”

“Yes! If you had thought for a minute, we wouldn’t have panicked for nothing.”

“You are the one who scared me with your demon talk.” he retorts.

“Oh, please! You were already freaking out.”

“Anyway,” Stiles interrupts, “no more horror movies after midnight. And no one has to know about what happened tonight.”

“Agreed.”

Drabble Masterlist

[oldmannapping]

Fic: Bodyswap (Part 2)

Part One

Based on my own prompt about wanting a body-swap fic that dealt with the gross embarrassing parts.

This has expanded into something more than I intended, but I can't stop writing.

It's a Dick-Jason, Tim-Steph bodyswap. There is literally no plot. They're body-swapped and trying to deal with it, that's it. No pairings, past Steph/Tim.

It's crack treated like crack. It's two parts for now but I might add more. Warnings for language, discussions of menstruation, discussions of sexuality.

EXCERPT:

“This isn’t just PMS,” Tim continues blithely. “This is definitely something more.”

Bruce and Dick take sizeable steps backwards. Jason cackles.

Steph flares Tim’s nostrils and opens her mouth. Far too late, Tim realises that he’s in danger.

“Timothy.” Somehow, she makes Tim’s voice growl almost as low as Batman’s. “PMS is not JUST anything. When women say that they are tired. Sad. Having cravings. Not themselves. We are not just making excuses to lie in bed and let the patriarchy win.”

Oh no, she said “patriarchy”. Tim’s fucked.

Bruce rubs his forehead, eyes pinched closed. He’s only been in the Cave for six minutes and he’s already regretting every life choice that led to this moment.

“So you can read each other’s minds?” he clarifies, still not opening his eyes.

“No,” Jason snaps derisively.

“Not really,” says Dick dick-lomatically. (Duke used that word ONE TIME and no one has ever let it go.) “It’s more like… familiar thought patterns? I’m still me, with my memories and thoughts, but I’ve got Jason’s… knee jerk reactions. His instincts. It’s hard to describe.”

“I haven’t noticed anything like that,” says Tim, peering at the older men with curiosity. “I haven’t run too many experiments yet though. I’m planning all sorts of cognitive testing and brain scans but I’ve been really foggy-headed and haven’t been able to put it together like I normally would.”

He frowns. “Now that I think about it, maybe that’s a symptom in itself. Could it be that the spell actively smothers attempts to break it? I was writing a program to analyse the results of some basic nerve conduction studies yesterday and I got so tired I had to have a nap. When I woke up, I was ravenous and completely forgot about the studies. This is fascinating. Bruce, is there any precedent for spells that are self-protecting like that? This could be something we should consult Zatanna about, or maybe even Constantine…”

“Yo, Boy Genius,” interrupts Steph, clicking Tim’s fingers in front of her own face. “That wasn’t the spell. Brain fog, fatigue, increased appetite? Congratulations, you’ve just discovered PMS.”

Tim is aghast. Jason has barked a surprised laugh and Dick and Bruce seem baffled.

“That, that can’t be right,” Tim insists. “You don’t understand Steph, I was operating WAY below my usual capacity. This wasn’t just a little brain fog. I was having a hard time with codes that I’d normally be able to do in my sleep. I forgot the word for “synthesise”. I took a two-hour nap then ate half a rotisserie chicken. I threw my keyboard across the room and then cried when it broke.”

“That was my chicken,” says Dick in a small, sad voice. Jason’s body needs a LOT of protein.

“This isn’t just PMS,” Tim continues blithely. “This is definitely something more.”

Bruce and Dick take sizeable steps backwards. Jason cackles.

Steph flares Tim’s nostrils and opens her mouth. Far too late, Tim realises that he’s in danger.

“Timothy.” Somehow, she makes Tim’s voice growl almost as low as Batman’s. “PMS is not JUST anything. When women say that they are tired. Sad. Having cravings. Not themselves. We are not just making excuses to lie in bed and let the patriarchy win.”

Oh no, she said “patriarchy”. Tim’s fucked.

Steph’s not done. “We are not weak. We are not hysterical, moody hypochondriacs with wandering wombs. We are experiencing the VERY REAL mental and physical and emotional effects of our bodies preparing to have a BABY and then overhauling itself by EJECTING AN ENTIRE BABY HOUSE out of our vaginas.”

She’s still not done. Tim’s trying not to breathe in case that makes her angrier.

“I’ve gone on patrol with a heat pack strapped under my costume. I’ve sat exams on days when I can’t remember which bus I usually take. I’ve cried in the bathroom at work and wiped my eyes, reapplied my mascara, and gone back out there because I’m a fucking woman and that’s what we’re doing every single freaking day while you assholes are telling us that we’re biologically designed to earn 35% less than you.”

Tim opens Steph’s mouth and all the other men in the room know that whatever he's about to say is going to be a mistake. “I don’t think women should earn less than men,” is what he lands on.

Bruce decides to speak up before Steph can reply. He's very brave. “So we can reasonably assume that the spell isn’t actively trying to prevent anyone from breaking it,” he says, clearing his throat. “And it doesn’t transfer thoughts and memories, but engrained thought patterns and autonomous reactions.”

Dick is very happy to be back on topic. “Yeah, basically.”

“What are some examples?” asks Bruce, walking to the Batcomputer and pulling up a spreadsheet.

Jason and Dick glower at each other silently, not wanting a rehash of their previous argument. This whole situation was dignity-shattering enough.

Dick coughs. “Jason and I have noticed,” he says carefully, “that we have each other’s automatic reflexes to situations. I’ve noticed that my aggression levels are up. I’m always wanting to scan the room for a threat. Jason’s noticed similar things about my body’s reactions.” He hopes that’s enough detail.

Bruce hums thoughtfully. “I don’t think it’s just your bodies,” he muses, typing rapidly. “It could be your brains – your actual, physical brains, not your consciousness or whatever’s been transferred by the spell. Brains like patterns and routines. It makes them effective. It seems that while your consciousnesses have been transplanted, the structure of each of your brains has remained unchanged.”

“Has anyone studied this before?” asks Tim, pulling up his phone and tapping away. “It makes sense but I’ve never heard of body-swapping having this particular wrinkle before.”

“It sounds like your bodies’ hormone levels remained the same too,” says Bruce awkwardly, glancing at Tim-in-Steph’s-body’s abdomen with faint alarm. “Of course, we’ll need to run further tests but that shouldn’t be too difficult since we’ve already been taking daily bloods…” He hums again and opens several more browsers, muttering to himself.

-_-

“TESTING!” booms Bruce’s voice suddenly, two hours later. He looks around. He is alone in the Cave. He presses the intercom. “Alfred, could you gather the kids and tell them- Dammit!” He misses Alfred so much. Bruce sighs and dials Dick’s phone, calling his children back to the Cave.

Once they’re assembled, he starts again.

“TESTING.”

They’re standing in a circle on the mats. Jason’s pointedly holding his phone where Dick can see the screen as he scrolls through nipple piercing and tattoo websites. Dick is trying to focus politely on Bruce. Tim and Steph are glowering grumpily next to each other.

Bruce ignores their moods. He claps his hands. He’s excited for testing. Testing is one of his favourite parts of weird magic times.

“Dick!” he says, pointing. “Unlock Jason’s phone.”

Rolling his eyes, Jason locks his phone and hands it off to Dick. Dick starts to hold it up to his/Jason’s face when Bruce says, “No, with the PIN. Don’t think about it, just see if you can do it with muscle memory.”

Dick looks back to the phone and stares for a beat. Then, his thumbs move rapidly to swipe through a nine-digit code. The phone unlocks.

“Motherfucker,” Jason swears, grabbing his phone back.

“You didn’t know the code before now?” confirms Bruce. Dick shakes his head. “What is it?”

Dick frowns, then shrugs. “I have no idea. My thumbs just-“ He mimes typing on a phone. “It was too quick for me to catch all the numbers.”

“Fascinating.” Bruce is so excited to add to his spreadsheet. He pulls something out of his pocket and throws it to Steph.

She catches it automatically. “Okay? We know we all have good reflexes?”

“You caught it with your left hand,” points out Bruce. “Even though that meant you had to reach across your body. Even though you, Stephanie, are right-handed, this body is not. This body’s brain and mind are still wired to have Tim’s reflexes even if you’re the one in conscious control.”

The four affected youths eye each other warily.

Bruce pulls out a folder. “I’ve printed some pictures to show you. I want you to give me your automatic reactions to these images, don’t overthink it.”

He goes through both benign and personal pictures. It turns out that seeing Dick’s favourite food makes Jason’s mouth water. Seeing Steph’s old childhood toy gives Tim, in her body, a jolt of nostalgic nausea even though he’s never seen the tatty bear before. (“How do you even have a picture of Mr Huggins?” asks Steph. “Creeper.”) Seeing a playground makes Tim’s body anxious and Jason’s body prickle with protective anticipation.

They all thoroughly agree that Bruce is weird for making them do all of this and then immediately disband to run secret individual experiments on their own.

-_-

“This body!” snaps Jason. “This body is so NEEDY!”

Dick groans. “What now?”

Jason paces restlessly. “First it needs to move all the damn time. I always thought you were fidgeting and doing handstands off tables and shit to be annoying, but you really can’t help it.”

Dick shrugs. “It’s been kinda weird to be in your body and not feel like that. I keep thinking I’m forgetting something but it’s just that I haven’t moved in a while and usually that’s a problem. No wonder you don’t mind long stakeouts.”

“No wonder you hate them,” Jason agrees. “It’s not even that this time. It’s this weird, like, almost itching. Like a shortness of breath. You’re not allergic to anything are you?”

He stalks over to his own body and frowns up at his own face. “Huh,” he says. “You’re not afraid of me. Zero fear response. You’re an idiot.”

Dick rolls Jason’s eyes. “Yeah yeah, you’ve very scary and edgy. Such an ambiguous anti-hero. Dear me, I hope he doesn’t snap one day. Etcetera.”

Jason shoulder-checks him (ineffectively) and storms over to where Tim and Steph are sending each other triggering images over text to see who will break first. Steph’s just sent Tim a picture of a happy family on vacation with the caption “not u lol” when Jason reaches them.

They stare at Jason blankly as he gets up in their personal space. They’re used to Dick being close to them so it doesn’t feel weird, but they know it’s JASON, so it IS weird. Jason grabs Steph-as-Tim’s arm and holds it for a moment. He grunts and releases it. He turns to Tim-in-Steph, an odd look on his face. He reaches for Tim’s arm but the movement seems to get away from him and he ends up grabbing Tim around the shoulders with one arm, holding him in close.

“What are you doing?” yelps Tim, struggling briefly.

“I have no idea,” says Jason, who seems equally baffled but isn’t letting go.

“Holy moly,” says Steph. “You two are tragic. Dick’s body needs a HUG, morons.”

Jason and Tim freeze. They simultaneously realise that this isn’t a strange new grappling move. This is a hug. Oh no they’re hugging. They don’t hug. They’re not huggers.

Dick snickers, coming over to view the scene. “I could have told you that,” he informs Jason.

“It’s not allergies?” says Jason, shuffling around to look at Dick without letting go of Tim. “Your body wanted a HUG? What are you, a toddler?”

“Hugs aren’t childish,” scolds Steph mildly, taking photos on her phone even though they will never capture the true awkwardness of a Tim-and-Jason hug. “Heaps of people need touch to feel good. Hugs, cuddles, patting a pet, whatever. Dick’s a hugger, you already knew that.”

“I knew he liked hugging, I didn’t know he needed it to live,” bites Jason, trying to appear nonchalant and cool while embracing Tim to his chest like a doll. “Why is this body hugging you? Steph, I mean. Why not just go for the closest person?”

Steph and Dick roll their eyes. “Jason, when was the last time you and I hugged?” Dick asks. Jason glowers.

Steph nods. “Dick and I hug all the time, dude. You two aren’t cuddly. That’s cool. Whatever. Tim lets me use him as a pillow at movie night so I’m happy. Dick’s body probably feels more comfortable with mine than the others here.”

“Plus, girls are so nice for hugs,” Dick adds. “So nice and soft. So snuggly and safe.”

That does it. Tim and Jason break apart and swiftly put eight feet of space between them. The incident is swiftly added to the Never To Be Spoken About Again list, which is growing longer by the day.

-_-

The end? To be continued? Who even knows.

[supercap2319]

Y/N and Ken walked hand and hand towards the beach where their counterparts were waiting for them, but also soaking up some sun. They stood at the top of the sand dunes before Y/N cleared his throat, gaining the attention of the Kens and Y/Ns.

"Attention my fellow Y/Ns and Kens. Ken and I have been to the real world for a couple of days and we've discovered that the men there are very different from here in Barbie Land." Y/N said.

"They have horses and patriarchy!" Ken cried excitedly.

"And we've also discovered that the men beach each off very differently as well. Instead of a well choreographed dance number and song. The men in the real world beach each other off by touching each other's genitals until this white sticky substance comes out."

"It's possibly milk." Ken said.

Tourist Ken/Rival Ken rolled his eyes. "Is that a fact, Ken? Prove it. Show us." All the other Kens and Y/Ns murmured in agreement.

"Wait, you want Ken and me to beach off right in front of you guys?" Y/N asked in surprise.

"Yeah. Unless you're chicken, Ken?" Tourist Ken/Rival Ken taunted.

Ken huffed in defiance as he looked at Y/N. "Come on, Y/N. Let's show them how real men beach off." He pulled his shorts down to reveal a mint green jockstrap as Y/N blushed and pulled his own pants down as he and Ken started to beach off for their counterparts.

"See? This is how you beach someone off, Ken!" Beach Ken snapped in between moans.

[wordycheeseblob]

Anyway. Guys. Smash the patriarchy HENrietta, my bias wrecker.

Chicken purse?

Chicken purse???

CHICKEN PURSE!!!!

✨🐓Chicken purse🐓✨

She’s been through a lot

[waitmyturtles]

I was supposed to finally have a quiet moment this week, my first of 2024, to catch up on all the dramas I’m behind on, but alas — real life has gotten in the way, and it’ll still be a little bit before I have time to write big meta again. I’m way behind on thoughts for last week’s episodes of Playboyy, Last Twilight, and Cherry Magic Thailand, but I do very much want to write about them, so some quick notes on these three as follows:

1) I owe @poetry-protest-pornography and @chaos0pikachu my thoughts on camp and Playboyy. I intended to pen this post last week after last week’s episode, but said life (ha) has gotten in the way. Friends, please note that I still SO want to write this, because I think deconstructing why camp as a style works in art will be a wonderful conversation, regardless of the narrative success (or not) of Playboyy.

So, speaking of the narrative success of Playboyy — and the upcoming debate (maybe?) about a balance of style and storytelling in dramas, I watched last week’s episode of Playboyy with this post about The Sign in mind, because I think this post gets at a thing that I want to write more about re: Playboyy, which is, like — what makes a story/narrative contextually coherent, and what responsibilities do the artists behind a show have to viewers to make a story coherent?

I think one thing we were coming to in the conversation on camp at the end of last year was whether or not Playboyy could be considered a good, a successful, or maybe even a complete story by way of its various elements. At least for now, leaving camp aside, I still don’t think this show is working narratively at all. That Captain/Keen storyline had my head spinning — uh, your coach gave you one difficult practice, and you revenge on him by filming a sex tape without consent? How…..did we get there? Porsche now has feelings for Jump? I’m still not grabbing the whole Aob/Puen feelings debacle? The Nant/Nuth storyline has gotten momentum, but not enough to fill the majority of an episode, which is a shame, because it’s the only storyline element giving this show any context at the moment. And as @lurkingshan noted, the only real compelling moment in this episode was between Teena and Zouey about how they’d transcend reality to love better versions of each other. It was lovely to watch! But I’m still not sure why we’re watching all of these storylines and if, ever, they’ll come together in a coherent arc.

So, yeah man. I was so intrigued by the premise of this show. It ain’t workin’. I’ll have more to think on this regarding style. But the stories aren’t coming together — and I TRULY think that’s a shame, considering the important themes of the show.

2) From the little ability I had to poke around Tumblr last week after the last Last Twilight episode, I think (I think!) a general feeling was that the episode wasn’t as depth-y as it could have been for the MANY heavy moments of parental interventions that took place. I believe that’s right. I think there were too many gaps in the contextual flow of the show that left Day’s mom looking more like an enemy (like, even on Pran’s mom’s level) that could have been addressed with a touch more context coming from her.

Let me explain. When I see single moms in Aof Noppharnach shows, I first go to He’s Coming To Me. HCTM has the best BL mom ever — a single mom absolutely ready to embrace her son as he’s coming out.

We know Aof loves depicting moms; he wrote as much about it last year after Moonlight Chicken aired. He’s got some legendary moms — of course, Pran’s mom; Tian’s controlling mom (who I posit is actually a front for patriarchy in A Tale of Thousand Stars); Pat’s passive mom, who is actually way more down with reality than Pat’s dad; Kao’s mom that Kao is so fearful of by way of disappointment. (Special shout-out to Pete’s dad in Dark Blue Kiss as the best BL dad.)

In other words, we know Aof has the goods when it comes to commentary on parenting. We know from episode 9 that Day’s mom (Mhon) went through tremendous hardship to raise her boys, including begging for food. She’s a famous and successful chef by the time we meet her, a workaholic. She’s a single mom, a working single mom, and Porjai is about to be on the same cusp. Night happens to be the bridge to those two.

Mhon’s willingness to keep Day in his room….her ignoring Night to start the Christmas dinner. The taking away of Day’s phone, oof. Saying that Mhok crossed a line — all while she was aware that Day previously had a crush on August. These small points create quite the enemy storyline on Mhon.

This is unfortunate, because I actually felt, watching the episode, that there was a lot about Asian parenting that was being left on the table. Valuing work and the safety of one’s kids OVER their happiness is quite the social phenomenon in Asian parenting. A good bit of Day’s mom’s actions could actually be seen as appropriate by certain-minded parents in Asia.

Yet, to have Day’s mom then ignore Night during the dinner, to have Day’s mom take Day’s phone away without explaining why he can’t be in a relationship — even for an Asian viewer like myself, well used to a particular amount of conditional brutality in Asian parenting — those storytelling decisions seemed a little harsh without more context as to how Day’s mom was driven to be the way she is now.

We had plenty of context into Dissaya in episode 10 of Bad Buddy. That moment opened doors for us to get what the hell was going on. I would love to have a similar contextual moment for Mhon, words by her about her story, that tell us how she got to where she is by way of raising her boys and becoming successful. Despite her behavior to her sons — we know she worked damn hard to provide for them. A badass lies within, and I know a successful Aof show would show us that. I hope we get it.

3) Cherry Magic Thailand, episode 5! I LOVE what’s happening with Rock/Min against the Rokkaku/Minato storyline — I love this expansion, and how Rock is less clueless and much more emotionally vulnerable than Rokkaku. I love feisty Pai. I LOVE Junior’s Jinta! I have to continue covering my mouth as I cackle.

As compared to Adachi at this point in the storyline — I wonder if CMT is offering Achi a bit more of the clueless hand than he deserves. I love the embellishments to the jealousy storyline between Karan and Kurosawa — Achi and Rock pushing off in the boat alone was particularly poignant — but Achi is well aware of Karan’s heart now, and I’m a little surprised that he seems a dash clueless that his interactions with others would make Karan jealous.

This is a minor quibble, though. Achi and Adachi are two dudes unfamiliar with love. But I wonder slightly if this vibe I’m feeling is perhaps a result of the original Cherry Magic Japan story being literally doubled in time in Thailand.

Again — MINOR quibble. This show is a refreshing delight. And I LOVE LOVE LOVE the next part of the storyline. I love that they found a similar place in Thailand to shoot Karan’s drunk flashback scene as Kurosawa’s in Japan. Will Achi offer us Thailand’s version of a classic JBL run? I sure damn hope so!

That’s it! I think I’ll be able to catch up on all of this week’s shows in real time, bless up!

[candy-red-river]

TOP 5 -women- IN RANFREN

HEY GAMERS AND HAPPY womens MONTH

IN ORDER TO CELEBRATE THIS EPIC SEASON I'VE CONCOCTED A LIST OF SOME OF THE NICEST LADIES THAT [webcomic randals friends] HAS TO OFFER (this is a mini analysis of female rnfrn characters in the youtube style since there aren't that many girls and they don't have much screentime)

NUMBER UNO!!!!!!11- GIANT SNAKE WOMAN

Here you can see her sporting a cute stylish hat along side black scales, truly a queen of fashion!! Her favorite hobbies include but are not limited to: VORE, MURDER, LIVING IN THE WALLS, resisting the patriarchy by LITERALLY EATING HER OWNER, and fashion of course!! Truly a cut above the rest, she fears no man and is always lurking in the shadows!! TRULY AMAZING- what an empowering female

Next up on our list is H E R.

OUR WONDERFUL CHICKEN RESTAURANT GODDESS HERSELF

SHE IS A HIGH AND POWERFUL GIRLBOSS WITH A KIND HEART

MOTHER WILL FEED US ALL

Number 3 and 4 on our list goes to kitty carpet and that one wall lady that nyon licked one time!!!!

I think it's weird that there's no ranfren wiki

Anyway, kiti car pet is a little furry/therian (?) Girl who got high on one of randals eyes and sunk into the floor. She's SO silly and quirky hehe~

Weirdly enough she's one of the most common lesser female characters, as she is constantly referenced and even came along for the camping trip. Nyen hates her, god forbid women do anything UGH!!!!!

You go kitty carpet, don't let the haterz get you down!!11!

And nimber five is ME

I'M THE GREATEST WOMAN OF ALL TIME AND THE MOST INTERESTING AND DIVERSE CHARACTER I WIN- wait what do you mean I'm at the bottom of the list?

[jungledboy]

aew dynamite 10/31 spoilers

so like. i don't mean to be That Guy in all of this silly business but i'm genuinely terrified at the fact the bucks left behind both okada and jack because i don't know what it Means . i can only think of a few things honestly

1. jack is turning face sooner than later. i've loved and adored the scapegoat but i'm thinking the interaction with luchasaurus from all out seemed kinda like it was an open door..? and that line from tonight "they used to sing for me too" after danny put hands on him backstage which is, y'know, technically kinda how the scapegoat character came about, maybe it made him vulnerable. i'm overthinking but maybe there's a chance he joins team baldie with the 3 gnomes, feuds with kenny omega when he's cleared and then will eventually be used as a sacrifice by mox since he keeps referencing being a sacrifice (that weird thing mox said.. "you're a sweet kid" hasn't left me btw). me and my brother brainstormed the shit out of this. imagine how cool it would be if he mixed the cutesie flippy jungle boy and scowling scapegoat. he could use welcome to the jungle by guns and roses UGH 2. jack is joining the bcc because he's lost the protection of the elite and he's a little shithead weasel. the bucks only care about each other which is totally fine because they're going to japan probably to see kenny, but i'm thinking jack might be the chicken shit type of heel to run straight into another faction for the sake of being in one. the line he said tonight could've been manipulating danny into thinking he's not beloved or that the crowd will turn on him. either that or he just didn't give a fuck about danny because he's gotten away with a lot of shit and thinks he's above him which is likely

3. jack will kiss danny at some point and he'll come out in the goat mask doing that hip roll thing. this has to be an option because they were meat to meat while he was being manhandled and all that man could do was smile. what a guy

i'm also wondering about the patriarchy and if he'll care about them at all now that he's got no protection. i also think if nothing comes out of this that okada should get jack in the divorce. just a thought. what an episode

[athenaluciscaelum]

//Minor do not interact//

Pairing: DMC5 Dante x Fem!Reader

Rated: Mature

Words: 3758 word

Warning: mature, patriarchy, misogyny, purity culture, abusive parents, slut shaming, racism, oral

Disclaimer:

This is specially for my all South Asian girl, a little representation, this fiction is what motivated me to start the blog. So I hope everybody enjoys it. I know a similar South Asian tradition can have different variations but I am writing from one we follow, and my own experiences. I do not condone purity culture or parents abusing their children, but sadly it's common, and very true representation. Even within South Asia, women have different degrees of independence or co-independence. The amount of abuse or none they face within household or within patriarchal setup is varying. After all, even gender within is intersectionality itself. This writing stems from my own personal experience and is by no means a representation of the whole of South Asia, but the majority. Me and @altissia-09 brain stormed this idea.

Feel free to leave comments.

LET'S ROCK!

Traditions

You were sitting on the couch near the frosted window of Devil May Cry looking out, not much to see. It was a sunny day, the streets were isolated. It was the start of fall. You could feel a little chill air, but it was pleasant. You always like fall and winter. Your eyes fell on a letter in your hand and following up to your ring finger, a platinum ring with a red ruby stone set in between, a perfect wedding ring, just as you wanted. You thought about Dante, he was out on a mission, and you took a leave from your work today. He was supposed to be back to discuss the wedding. You trusted him and knew he would be back as soon as possible. After all, you were both so excited, you thought Dante would play cool and act like he couldn't care for details. But oh, you were so wrong. He wanted to be part of everything. It was his wedding as well, the only one he intended to do. So he could not miss a thing.

You two were not planning anything grand, it would be just the DMC crew-Nero, Kyrie, Lady, Trish, Nico, Vergil, Morrison, Patty and Enzo. From your side, no one in your family will accept a white man and someone not from the same faith as your family. They are not aware of the Devil yet, nor do they need to be. But anyway, here you are, you were disowned a long time ago when you told them upfront what a shit purity culture was, and you will date Dante because you love him. Marriage can be damned. They totally berated you for how shameless you were, abused you, and were about to raise their hand. But Dante had enough, he snapped. You held his hand tight to ease him. As soon as things got physical, before your mother's hand can land on your cheek, he held your mother's hand to stop her, his teeth gritted and clenched, "That's it. Enough. You don't deserve a daughter like her!" Your mother and family started to insult you like they always do, reminding you of every penny they spent on you and how selfish you were, taking everything and leaving as soon as you find a man.

They curse you that you will know the same pain they feel from your children. But you will not stop loving your children if they are not everything you want them to be. You sighed. You still remember when you were with Dante on your first date. It was early on and Dante was quite broke back then. You were no better in the last semester of your college doing a shitty paid internship. So you two pool in all the money, you both scavenged enough to go on a pizza date. Dante wasn't sure, but you said it's a date enough as long as he is there. You two can walk and talk till your heart's content. Pizza was a tasty addition. As you two were in Pizzeria enjoying Chicken Tikka Pizza, Dante was not sure what atrocity this was, but he tried as long as it had no olives. As you two were talking,your phone rang when you saw 'Maa' on caller ID, all color drained out of your face. You answer so scared and lied you to your mother that you were out with a friend. Dante was surprised you were young but a grown woman. So naturally, as a concerned and loving boyfriend, he asked about your family, at first it wasn't important to him, but now, he can't just sweep this under the carpet, first date be damned. You answered truthfully, you never liked lying anyway, you mentioned how your family treated you. You wanted to be clear about what he was getting himself into secret dates, no night stays, sex is off table for now, he can't call you anytime, and dates would be rare and away from the city. Dante didn't object, but he asked, "So your family do not love you?" You shook your head and answered sincerely, "They do. As long as I do everything they say. Little divergence and I will be unworthy of love, right?" Words hung heavy in the air. He just held your hand tight. The parental love Dante knew was acceptance, no matter what Dante or Vergil used to do, Eva always used to love them unconditionally, and he was sure, she would have even know. Dante didn't have much love in his life, but he was once loved dearly and knew what love is, especially parental ove. You were a perfect little girl back then for your family, but no more, you just dated, even if you were in your early twenties. Your family would not like it, you were never supposed to date. You were supposed to be 'pure' and get married to a guy they choose from the right family and faith, so the chain of your command can be given into his hands. You felt like a dog on a leash. But not anymore, you broke the rules, you were no longer a good girl, you were only you and Dante accepted it. And it only fueled your courage. So, after a few months of dating in secrecy and Dante climbing up to your window to sneak into your room at night, cuddling. While you tried your best to keep your voice down as he was balls deep in your sweet pussy. It was tough, but for him, sure.

After a few months, your family brought up the topic of marriage again, this time seriously. You sighed as they tried to show you pictures of more boys or men who were so pitiful that they couldn't find a woman themselves, or they had strings of flings and what not, but now they wanted a 'pure' girl to settle down. This was very common, and you knew how their pathetic mentality worked. You held your head in your hand as your mama was blabbering about tons of guys she found on a matrimonial site and talked to. She went on about how religious they were, how good they earned and whatever she found best for you. You sighed, "No!" Your mama frowned, "No? It's the right time, Y/N, you should get married as soon as possible and settle down. You aren't getting any younger." You can't take it anymore and went to your room. Your mama followed, "You will get married! You like it or not, young lady, and don't you dare to close the door!" You were in tears from anger, you could never speak in such situations, just cry, yet you spoke, "You can't make a decision for my life!" Your mama glared at you, she slapped you hard and squeezed your cheeks with bruising grip, she spoke hard, "Don't you dare to talk back! I made you! I will do whatever the fuck I want with you! Marry you off anybody I like, or kill you!" You held your knees close to your chest as you cried. You ha enough. You escaped from the window and went to Devil May Cry agency, it was 01:00A.M. Dante was surprised.

Dante held your shoulders, "What are you doing here? You know it's not safe, you were out at this time? You know, some Demon or human could have attacked you." He saw fingerprints and red marks left by how painfully your cheeks were held. His eyes darkened, you felt him lose control, his eyes demonic and his body morphed scaly for a second, he spoke in a cold voice, "Who did this...?" You looked down, "Maa...they want me to get married to guy they choose." Dante frowned, "No way in hell, I am letting you marry a loser." You held his hand, "Let's go...?" Dante frowned, "Right to give your mother, a piece of mind!" You shook your head, "No.... I am doing nothing wrong, I love you, I won't hide it anymore, we are going to face them." Dante chuckled, "Do I need to look presentable?" You smiled, "You are perfect."

You reached your home at 02:00AM. Your mama and papa were shocked as they saw you and Dante at the front door, holding hands. You said, "I love Dante, we have been dating and we have made love. I don't care if you accept it or not, but if you do, it is all I ask you."

Your mama saw you read, she was ready to physically assault you, but Dante pulled you behind him. He spoke disappointed, "Not so fast, lady, you don't get to hit my girlfriend." Your mama shouted, "Your girlfriend! She is my daughter! You tricked my little flower in your bed. You seduced her!" You were quick to cut your mother, you spoke as a matter of fact, "He did no such thing, Ma, I'm an adult, Dante loves, and I love him, and I gave myself to him out of my own free will." Your mama looked at you, she spoke condescending, "Shut up! Idiot! I never knew I raised a whore!" Dante shouted," "Enough!" You looked at your papa, and spoke softly, your voice broken, "Papa?" Your papa sighed, "I am so disappointed in you, I wish I had never had you. But.... let's go in and talk."

You were all seated on the couch facing each other. Your father goes through questions. He sighed, "So Mister Dante, how about you tell me about yourself." Dante was angry but stayed calm for you. He answered holding your hand, "I am Dante, I live on the east side of Capulet City, I run an agency called Devil May Cry, and let's say it's a.......pest control job." Your father nodded, "What faith do you follow?" Dante relaxed on his spot, "None, sir, I have no problem with whatever faith, Y/N choose to follow or practice. She is the kindest person I know." Your father was lost in thought and spoke after a while, "Will you convert?" You snapped, "Papa! Stop it!" Dante stood up, he was calm, "The answer is no. Your daughter helped me accept myself for who I am, so I have no intention of changing." You smiled, you were proud of him. Your mother spoke, "Y/N, can't you see, he is not serious! He is just using you as a toy who is young and innocent. As soon as he is bored, or you are knocked up, he will leave you! You know these people have no respect for relations or marriage. It's all fun and game to them" Dante sighed, "Seriously?" You were cringing so hard internally, "Seriously, maa, this is also racism, you know?"

Before your ma and papa could protest more, Dante took your hand to leave, your father spoke in a spiteful voice, "A step out of the threshold, and you are disowned, him or us?" You sighed, "Well, at least for him, I am enough. I will never be enough for you." You crossed that threshold knowing you would never come back, it was so nice to feel all the chains around you drop, though the pain of losing your parents was there, your freedom helped ease it. Your parents were shouting as you two left, "Just wait! He will leave you in no time!"

You fall asleep with the letter in your hand, the letter containing paper that the documents that you are legally disowned and will not get a single penny from them, like you cared. Dante comes back setting Rebellion and his dual pistol back in their place. He came to you and kissed your forehead, you smiled as you opened your heavy eyes, you spoke softly, "Dante?" Dante smiled, "Sorry, I am late, but don't worry, Trish and Lady are on the way. We will discuss everything. And you can go bridal shopping with girls. Patty will join you as well. Be prepared to be drained."

You just gave him a weak smile, he looked at the letter in your hand, he asked, "What's that?" You shrugged and lied, "More bills..." He shook his head, "Nope! Not in the mood for those. Today, I will spoil my girl! I will go get showered. And we can get started." You nodded and smiled.

After everyone was at the Devil May Cry agency,it was decided you will hold your wedding near the Lake in the forest, since it is a private affair, Vergil will be your officiator, Nero will be Dante's best man, Trish, Patty and Lady will be your bride's maid with one of your close friends, Natasha being your maid of honor. You asked Morrison to walk you down the aisle. He got emotional and agreed. Kyrie was more than happy to take care of everything in Devil May Cry when you two arrived as a married couple. Dante called Lucia, but she didn't answer. You were aware of her feelings for Dante, you thought it was best not to press her. Matier was happy, she sent her blessings and regards. Matier laughed on the call, "So this was your reason, Dante?"

You and the girls were ready for bridal shopping. Patty asked, "You will look great in a white dress!" You answered a little shy, "I don't want to wear a white dress, we traditionally wear red, Dante,I want to wear a red dress. I don't hope to find a lehenga or saree here, so dress will do." Dante smiled, "I love red!" You giggled. You looked at him, you spoke a little unsure, "There is another tradition I want to add, everyone." All eyes were on you. You were nervous, "Well, it's called Henna Night or Mehendi, a night before marriage, all girls apply henna on their hand and especially Bride. They say the deeper the stain of henna, the deeper the love. And also in henna design in brides' hands. You hide the name of the groom somewhere in the design." Trish was curious, "Why is the name of the groom hidden?" You blushed, "Well, that will be a task for Dante. Nico thought, "I heard the stain is dark, because you are actually horny and body heat decides the temperature of the stain." You were red and everyone laughed, Dante was grinning like an idiot, he spoke proud, "Awww babe, I will make sure you get the deepest stain." And everyone laughed again.

On the night before the wedding, your friend Natasha came to pick you and the other girls to her house. Dante protested, "Hey! Not fair!" Natasha smiled, "Come and get her tomorrow." As you and the girls were in the car, Natasha blew all the typical Bollywood marriage songs in her car music system on drive to her home, you were not much of party person. But it was fun how much everyone was enjoying it. At her home, the whole living room was decorated with mattresses on the floor and white sheets on them, there were pillows everywhere. Marigold flower strings decorate the wall. Henna cone on a silver plate. Trish, Lady, Nico, Kyrie, and Patty enjoyed the night of applying henna on each other, their designs were 'unique', you could not stop yourself from laughing as they danced to Bollywood songs and were trying to make sense out of saree. They tried tons of traditional sweets. You were sitting quietly, your hand lay flat on the pillow and Natasha was applying henna to your hand. Traditionally, it was supposed to be till elbow but you both decided to cut it short. You saw Dante's name hidden on your left hand's index finger. You smiled at Natasha, "He won't be able to find it." Natasha laughed, "Good, then he is getting no action on his wedding night. Now let it dry, it's not wet, but the longer it stays the better the color. I will apply some lemon juice and sugar on it, so it doesn't dry and shed off quickly." You nodded as Natasha did just that. You were sleeping alone in the guest room, hands above your head so they don't touch anything and ruin the henna. You couldn't sleep, you were so excited. You felt something in your room, before you could sit up, a hand on your mouth kept you down, it was beautiful icy blue eyes and the smile you loved most. He puts a finger on your lips, "Shh.... it's me....angel .." Your eyes were wide, you whispered "Dante....why are you here...? It's not good." Dante chuckled, "You are marrying a devil, don't tell me you are afraid of bad luck." You giggled, "But why are you here?" Dante was above you, he smiled, loving how your hands were above your head, and you were at his mercy. His fingers pulling the string at the back of your neck, he answered, "Because this reminds me of the time when I used to sneak into your room and....as a loving husband..." You corrected, "Fiancé." Dante puts a finger on your lips, "Shh....husband. I have to make sure my love is a wonder, and you get the deepest red stain, my angel."

You blushed, "Dante..." Dante chuckled, "Don't move, we don't want this beautiful design ruined. Stay still and quiet for me?" You nodded.. Dante leaned to kiss your lips, you kissed him back with equal fervor, it was torture that you couldn't touch him. He pulled off your dress and fondled your breasts. A hand keeps massaging and squeezing your breasts, your eyes squeeze shut, as his head trails down from your breast, to your stomach, to your lower abdomen with trails of kisses. He reaches your core and places a kiss from your vulva to your clit through your panties. He parts your legs with one hand. As both his hands come down to spread you and kiss each side of your inner thighs, until he decides it was enough tease. And, he settled his head between your legs, taking off your panties, hooking his arms on each of your thighs, he eats you like a starved man. He started with a soft little kiss on your nub, then his tongue flat, licking broad stripes from your vulva to your clit, sucking on your nub till you were a whimpering mess, your legs trembling. He parted your folds and puts his thick middle finger in, screwing you in and out while sucking on your clit, lapping all your juice. You were a mess, biting your lower lip, your head nuzzling your pillow to keep quiet. He keeps altering between using his finger and sucking on you. Your legs are shaking, a tell-tale sign of your orgasm, but he got a build it more, leaving you all hot and bothered for long. He pulls away and you whine. Dante smirks, his thumb on your cheeks, "Aww... My angel wants to cum?" You nodded eagerly, all flustered and panting, while making sure your henna design isn't ruined. You whispered, "Dante please." Dante rubs circles with his thumb on your clit building you up and stopping as soon as he realizes you are about to come. You were a whining mess, "Dante, please." Dante kissed a side of your face and close to your mouth, "Please what? Babe." You whine, "Let me cum ....." Dante nods, "As you wish." He puts a finger into your throbbing pussy and slides it in and out, adding another, you buck your hips, and he chuckles, how eager his angel is. He picks a pace a little to build your orgasm, but as you were so close, he pulls away, "Not so fast, sweetheart." You cry silently and thrash your leg, he smiles, leaning down to kiss your sensitive spot on your neck, helping you ease and making you shiver, as he keeps kissing your neck, sucking it hard to leave marks. You cry, "Let me cum ... Dante" Dante sighs and pulls himself down to nuzzle your pussy, his stubble grazing your delicate pussy..he licks it and sucks on it. He fucks you with his tongue in and out till your body trembles, and you cum in his mouth, he laps it all, licking it clean. You bit your lips hard to not scream. He puts your legs back down as your whole body trembles. He kisses your cheeks and pulls away to stand up. He smiles, "This should make sure you get a deep stain." You were too tired to say anything, you fell asleep in no time, Dante cleaned you to put your dress back on, covered you with sheets, your henna was dry enough to let your arms rest beside you. He kisses your forehead as he leaves, jumping from the window.

The transition from morning to the Lake was smooth. You were wearing the red dress you chose. It was perfect. Dante made sure you got the dress of your dreams. Your Henna design was beautiful. It was the deepest shade of red. A red veil covers your beautiful face. Morrison walked you down the aisle where Dante was waiting in a black tuxedo with red tie, you smiled through a veil, Vergil spoke in an authoritative voice, "Sit down, everyone. Tonight, we are here to the satanic matrimony of a star, and a a star, and a fool." You giggled, everyone laughed, Dante just huffed. Vergil smirked, he continued, "there is no such thing as anyone objecting to this wedding, so do not even try, or else..." Everyone felt the cold glare. You smiled at Dante. Vergil looked at everyone, "Hmpp... exchange your vows." You spoke, "I vow to always make you smile, to accept you for who you are, to love you through the happiest and the saddest times, I vow to understand you always, to be there for you. To be there when you need me and make you the happiest man ever. As you made me the luckiest woman in the world. I will never stop trying," You were emotional and your voice breaking, Dante was serious..he took your hand in his. "Y/N, I vow to protect you, take care of you, try to give you everything I can, to love you even if we have our differences and respect you for who you are. To make you happy, as you make me the happiest man in the world."

Vergil nodded smiling, "Dante, do you take Y/N as your wife?" Dante smiled, "I do." Vergil looked at you, "Do you take Dante as your husband?* You nodded eagerly, "I do! I do! I do!" Dante smiled, Vergil tried not to smile like ab idiot, "By the power vested in me. I-" Dante cuts him, "Wait-wait, we are vesting no power in you." You nodded through your veiled face, "Yeah, you go Third Reich crazy with power" Vergil clenches his teeth and spoke, "Silence!" You to snickered and were quite when Vergil glared. Vergil sighed snd spoke casually ,"You are now husband and wife. Kiss, idiots!"

Dante took off your veil to look at your beautiful face, he scooped you in his arms and kissed you deeply. You kissed him back cupping his face, everyone clapped and smiled. It was followed by a ton of music, dance, food and everyone congratulating you both. When you both came back to the agency, Kyrie cleaned the whole place, Dante was carrying you bridal style, you went upstairs to your bedroom before him. It was decorated with roses, candles, and a vanilla fragrance. You sat there with your veil in the middle of bed. When Dante walked in, he was eager. He was about to take your veil off when you held out your henna-stained hand in front of him. You spoke flustered, "It has your name, find it, you can't make love to me, unless you do." Dante chuckled and smiled, "okay, I was in the mood for something else, but I do not mind earning it." Dante looked hard, he tried, he really tried, he was losing patience, "Is it in english?" You nodded. Another five minutes, he sighed, "You are messing with me, there are no names in it." You laughed, "There is!" He tried and as he about to give up, he grinned excited, "There it is!" He pointed at index finger of your left hand and you nodded. He wasted no time in taking your veil off and pinning you to bed. He was eager to take your dress off, but he felt resistance, he raised his eyebrow, you laughed. "Wedding dress are hard to take off, dummy. Now help me out of it, I don't want my wedding dress ruined. As you both took all pins out and lil stitches out of way. It took quite a while to get you out of the dress. Dante was exhausted with such delicate work of making sure everything is off and dress is intact, "Who makes such dresses!?" You laughed, "Well, it's pretty..."

That night, Dante didn't get to enjoy the fruit of his labour to say the least.

Tagged: @marshmallows-and-champagne @altissia-09

[spiderfreedom]

About this post, out of curiosity, when do you think it all started? Is there research on like how far back it goes? It obviously isn't inherent to human nature; I know it's not. Is it just one of those toxic things that started from the beginning of organized religion :( ?

There's research, but there's a lot of controversy on when/how patriarchy developed. The most important thing to note is that Greek/Roman/Chinese/Japanese style misogyny is not universal and has not always been the norm. Societies differed a lot in how much power and autonomy women had. At the same time, we must be conscious even the 'best' societies of the past still had faults surrounding women.

Some places to start are:

Alice Evans: Ten Thousand Years of Patriarchy: This article looks at it from an economic and cultural perspective. I strongly recommend reading her Substack, where she travels around the world interviewing Third World Women and Feminists to see why their women's liberation movements have succeeded or failed! From the linked article:

Our world is marked by the Great Gender Divergence. Objective data on employment, governance, laws, and violence shows that all societies are gender unequal, some more than others. In South Asia, North Africa and the Middle East, it is men who provide for their families and organise politically. Chinese women work but are still locked out of politics. Latin America has undergone radical transformation, staging massive rallies against male violence and nearly achieving gender parity in political representation. Scandinavia still comes closest to a feminist utopia, but for most of history Europe was far more patriarchal than matrilineal South East Asia and Southern Africa. [...] Why do some societies have a stronger preference for female cloistering? To answer that question, we must go back ten thousand years. Over the longue durée, there have been three major waves of patriarchy: the Neolithic Revolution, conquests, and Islam. These ancient ‘waves’ helped determine how gender relations in each region of the world would be transformed by the onset of modern economic growth.

Another thing to remember/consider when it comes to studying the past is how few resources we have. We only know so much about how pre-historical humans organized their societies. Colonialism destroyed evidence of other societies with different ways of approaching gender. Many of the great apes we study are endangered. And literate societies happened to be patriarchal societies (likely related to literacy going hand in hand with bureaucracy and agriculture and the development of a state?) so we don't know as much as we could about women in literate regions.

Organized religion definitely codified a lot about patriarchy, but the major religions (Christianity, Islam, Buddhism) arose in regions of the world that were already patriarchal. So it's kind of a chicken and the egg problem when it comes to patriarchy and religion. We know that religions that worshipped goddesses, like Greek and Roman paganism and Hinduism, can still coexist with sexist societies.

These aren't great answers, but it's a big question and there are a lot of people working on answering it! It ties back into the bigger question of what our human ancestors were like, and whether we're kind of doomed to violence and xenophobia or whether there are alternatives. Some other books I've read that may be useful reading on this front are:

The Dawn of Everything. A long book, but it's a tour of human history and different societies and ways of organizing society. One of the chapters is on women, if I recall correctly.

Women's Work: The First 20,000 Years: Women, Cloth, and Society in Early Times. Women have been working with cloth for a very long time. In some societies, this allowed women a high degree of status (see the Minoans!) and in others, women were worked to the bone producing textiles (Ancient Egypt).

The book "Demonic Males" looks at the birth of patriarchy from a primatology perspective. Our ape ancestors show male-dominant behaviors and societies. It's controversial the extent this is directly responsible for misogyny and male violence, but I think it's likely that our ape inheritance influenced the structure of early humans - so we basically have a lot of baggage.

Broadly speaking, reading books on feminist anthropology will help you, because a lot of what we know about patriarchy is based on highly literate societies, which as we established, are also agricultural societies with bureaucracies and a hierarchical culture. That's hardly representative of the human condition. As an example, look at Inuit society - on the one hand, there is arranged marriage and all that it implies; on the other, we do not have the same ideals of silent women who stay at home - women are valued members of the society and their skills are explicitly recognized as necessary for survival. Compare Western cultures that view domestic tasks as "support" tasks while the "real" work is done by men.

Finally, this one is a bit old (1974), but it may give you a starting point for understanding feminist anthropology and the search for the origins of patriarchy: "Is Female to Nature as Male is to Culture". It can help us understand how female subordination manifests itself in different cultures, and to know what to look for.

I hope this has been helpful. If anyone can recommend good books on the origin of patriarchy/female subordination (especially for non-Western cultures), please feel free to add in the replies or reblogs!

[dedalvs]

Regarding the valar-Valyria question and patriarchy, I always thought that "valar" should be more properly translated as "people/humanity", as Daenerys in the book does believe Missandei's "valar morghulis" applies to her (vs the "we are not men" quip in the show) -- and that it was only translated as "men" in Common Tongue because Westeros is patriarchal. Your dārys/dāria answer the other day seemed to lean that way.

But I see that there are different words for people (issarori) and humanity (ābrar)? Are those words also adaptations of HV to describe Westerosi life? Or maybe valar used to be more gender-neutral and changed later?

The presence of one word doesn't necessarily change the definition of another word. When I'm coining words in High Valyrian, there are a number of checks I go through. For example, āeksion is "gold". That's the first word I created. There are a number of ways, both regular and somewhat irregular, that one noun can be turned into another of a different class. So, for example, āeksion is "gold", deverbative agents end in -io, so, somewhat irregularly, I created āeksio "master" (has to be irregular, since the two nouns have nearly the same declension pattern)—one associated with gold. I also check to see if there are any obvious derivations that can be made. So, for example, if āegion is "iron", then āegenka is "made of iron". Another check I make is to see if there's a paucal derivation that makes sense. Most of the time the paucal is simply a number (so qulbes is "chicken", and qulbin is "a few chickens"), but sometimes it can derive a new word (for example, sȳndor is "shadow", and sȳndrun is a few shadows gathered together, that is "shade"). Along with the paucal, the collective is also a potential for derivation. We already had vala and valar. So I created thew word for "woman" ābra. I thought if valar is something, ābrar is likely to be something, too. It has a number of meanings, among them human beings or humanity, in general. This is on par with riña being "girl" and riñar being "children". If you want to talk about any child in general, you use riña. You can do this with adults with ābra, as well, but it's more common with children. In referring to children, their age is remarkable; when referring to adults, generally, their age is not. If you look out at a busy market place, that's ābrar.

Importantly, nothing about ābra or ābrar and the way they're used has anything to do with vala or valar. Think about the words "hoodie" and "sweatshirt". They can technically refer to different things, but they don't have to—and if someone says to you, "Oh, can you grab my sweatshirt?", and you're like, "Where is it? I don't see one. Do I need to go to the closet?" because you're passive-aggressively thinking, "THAT'S A HOODIE, NOT A SWEATSHIRT!", then, well, aren't you just precious! But for most people, the existence of one word doesn't require the meaning of a previous word to change. It may change, but it need not. And, in fact, even if there is technically a difference between two words, that doesn't meant that everyone will acknowledge it. A bit of a different type of thing, but consider "We need less chairs in the dining room". Technically it should be "We need fewer chairs in the dining room", but especially in a casual environment, most English speakers will accept either with no difference in meaning between the two.

Anyway, when creating a language, it doesn't make a difference to me if a word for something already exists. Why not create another, if it makes sense? Maybe some people will use it and others won't. Maybe it will end up having a specialized usage. Maybe one will be regional, or one will be common for many years, and then the other becomes more common. I don't worry too much about it. It's nice to have a sizable vocabulary—a lot of paint on your pallet.

I hope that makes sense!