#or hilariously bad

[another-goblin]

So Blade became immortal while trying to make a baby with his husband. Blade at the moment was a 100+ y/o short living normal human man, so of course necromancy was involved (not the way you just thought, even though it would've probably made more sense than what actually happened).

Some cannibalism was also probably involved. And the dead body of their best friend. Who might or might not have died while fighting the husband who temporarily turned into a monster. Or it was the friend who turned into a monster. Or it might have been an unrelated monster (whom Blade later ate. Wait, did he defeat the monster by eating it? Why did he swear to take revenge on DF then? Did DF make Blade eat that monster? Who knows!)

The funny thing is the HCQ canon is such a clusterfuck that all these things are either literally canon or can be inferred from what we know. And I think the writers probably consider the HCQ story finished, so we'll never know for sure what actually happened. And it's probably for the best.

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[egophiliac]

(looks at upcoming card releases)

I'm in danger :)

[fanaticalthings]

the muskification of twitter except it's lex luthor instead of elon lol

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[meltedmush]

.

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I so badly wish there was more of Shen Jiu,,, 😭

[thepenguisalive7]

*panicked muffin man noises*

[ren-054]

Alternate universe where there’s a Mr Hugeface route and he doesn’t kill me :3

[mossy-rock-in-a-field]

Several weeks ago, my retirement-age mother requested that I play Baldur’s Gate 3 for her because she has trouble with controllers/keyboards and wanted “to see what all the fuss is about with that cute wizard boy.” For context, my mother and I have done this sort of thing in the past with certain RPGs (dragon age, mass effect, etc.), but it’s been a few years since she’s personally requested a game like this. Basically, I control her Tav but let her make all the choices so she can determine how the story plays out without worrying about mechanics. She treats it like a choose-your-own-adventure book.

Anyway, here is a list of some of the things my mother has said and/or chosen to do throughout the course of BG3 in no particular order:

She is (obviously) romancing Gale. She is quite smitten with him and his passion for books and learning; she also thinks he’s polite and qualifies as “relationship material.” She also REALLY likes the things he’s said about his cat so far (my mom is a cat lady), so I know she’s gonna flip shit when we meet Tara in Act III.

She’s playing a normal druid Tav with a generally good alignment. Her favorite spell is Spike Growth because she thinks it’s hilarious whenever enemies walk into the AOE and die. I usually end up having to cast it at least once per battle per her request. Sometimes twice.

Contrary to her alignment, my mother tasks me with robbing every single chest, crate, barrel, and burlap sack we come across; this also includes people and their pockets. The party is always at max carrying capacity. ALWAYS. She doesn’t like selling things because “what if I need them.” The camp stash is in literal shambles. There is no hope of organizing it. She’s got like fifty seven sets of rags and a billion pieces of random silverware.

She MUST talk to every animal and corpse in the game. I think five hours of her total playtime so far (47ish) has been spent speaking to animals as many times as humanly possible. Like, I was thorough in my own playthroughs, but this is on a whole other level.

She did NOT get Volo’s lobotomy, but she did let Auntie Ethel take her eye in hopes of a cure for the tadpole. I did not understand the logic then. I still do not understand it now.

She is far more interested in fashion than equipment stats. Do you have any idea how much gold I’ve had to spend on dyes just to make things match? SO much. Same vibe as that “please someone help me balance my finances my family is starving” tweet but instead of candles it’s thirty thousand fucking bottles of black and furnace red dye.

We broke the prisoners out of Moonrise, but they got on the boat too early and bugged the fight by leaving Astarion and Karlach behind. Wulbren Bongle somehow got stuck in combat mode even after engaging the cutscene on the docks below Last Light; he he kept trying to run ALL THE WAY BACK TO MOONRISE nine fucking meters at a time while I frantically tried to finish the fight with the Warden, otherwise Wulbren would have run straight into the shadow curse. (I would’ve let him go; fuck Wulbren Bongle, all my homies hate Wulbren Bongle. But my mom didn’t know that, and she wanted to keep him safe. So.)

She had me reload a save like eighteen times to save the giant eagles on top of Rosymorn Monastery. Wouldn’t even let me do non-lethal damage just to get past things. I think getting that warhammer for the dawnmaster puzzle took us like an hour and a half alone. (Yes, I know you can use any warhammer, but SHE didn’t.)

She’s started keeping an irl notebook to keep track of her quests between play sessions. She writes down ideas and strategies when she thinks of them during the week, then brings them to her next game session at my house. I think she wrote about three pages on possible approaches to the goblin fortress alone.

She insists that I pet Scratch and the owlbear cub before every single long rest, no exceptions. Sometimes I have to do it multiple times until she is absolutely sure that the animals know exactly how much she loves and cherishes them. She has also commissioned a crocheted owlbear plush from a friend of hers and is very excited.

I’m sure there’s a bunch of stuff I’m forgetting, but those are some fun things I thought of. She’s enjoying the game and is telling all of her retired friends to get it and play it for themselves. She asked me “what is Discord” yesterday and I think my life flashed before my eyes.

anyway shout out to my mom for being neat

Part 2 — Part 3 — Part 4 — Part 5

[allshewhispers]

Dazai quickly changing the subject after failing to win Chuuya over with his flirting😭

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Kiss Kiss Fallen Tree!

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[evelynpr]

Congratulations My Hero Academia for providing, possibly, the biggest and longest legit straightbaiting yet in shonen history.

Bonus points that their final chapter was released on yaoi day.

[leahdrawsstuff]

they can never make me hate you Caitlyn Kiramman. Girlboss girlfailure supreme. I support women’s wrongs and I love you

[foldingfittedsheets]

I just burn my pubes off with a lighter, hope this helps!

I swore I was done. I even got a tip giving me permission to be done.

But this was so goddamn funny it had both my wife and I in stitches, so you win. Last pube post to you, Lighter Anon. May your bush burn brightly!

[egophiliac]

just thinking about hair and faces

[kitabearuwu]

A couple of Chaos Theory and Camp Cretaceous doodles I did a while back as requests before the show released

I’d share all of them but I can only put 10 pics lmao

[1v31182m5]

On my planet, this is hilarious /starfire ref

Joke explanation in tags