#only one person has guessed who it is correctly so far. and that was in a private convo 💀

[caffedrine]

Keith Howell Sequel 04 - Fan Translation

If you trust me to know what I'm doing, then we have both made a huge mistake. I cannot guarantee accuracy for this fan translation, or even grammatical correctness.

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In the throne room, a large lantern catches the eye, creating a splendid yet solemn atmosphere.

Upon the golden throne at the top of the stairs sat a middle-aged man with flaxen hair dressed in a flamboyant kimono.

Keith: “I am Keith Howell, the first prince of the Jade Kingdom.”

Keith: “And this is my fiancée, Emma.”

Kuga: “You’ve traveled a long way to come here.”

Kuga: “However, I sincerely apologize for the delay in greeting you due to personal matters. Were you able to rest up yesterday?”

Keith: “Yes. We are both filled with gratitude for your thoughtful hospitality.”

Keith: “I also greatly appreciated the opportunity to tour your valuable facilities, including the training grounds and clinic.”

Kuga: “Keith, you are one of Kagari’s few friends. Feel free to move about as you like during your stay.”

Kuga: “However, due to some mechanisms installed during the castle renovations, guests sometimes get lost.”

Keith and Emma: ““Huh?””

Kuga: “If you wander about without a guide, do be careful.”

Kuga: “Even I, who live here, get lost, haha!”

(King Kuga gets lost too... I should avoid wandering alone.)

Kagari: “Don’t take it seriously. He only gets lost during busy times.”

Kuga: “You say that, but it makes me want to get lost even during quiet times.”

Laughter echoed in the throne room, brightening the mood. The dignified yet boisterous and friendly atmosphere instantly eased the tension.

Kagari: “Just so you know, I am of noble descent too.”

Kagari: “This land has been ruled by Kuga for a long time, and I kind of found my way in here by coincidence.”

Keith: “...I see.”

(I guess Keith doesn’t know why Kagari left the royal family to join Kuga's faction.)

(He probably won’t share the details easily.)

Kuga: “If I remember correctly, you encountered Kagari in the city earlier, didn’t you?”

Kuga: “What was it like from the perspective of an outsider? It was a lively town, wasn’t it?”

Keith: “Yes. It was very vibrant.”

Keith: “Everywhere I looked, there were smiles, and the way the townspeople lived freely was very impressive.”

As Keith’s gaze turned toward us, I nodded in agreement.

Emma: “There are still many places we haven't been to yet,”

Emma: “I want to enjoy not only the culture of Kougyoku but also the charm of this land ruled by King Kuga.”

Kuga listened to our words, resting his chin on his hand, and he displayed a warm smile, gently lowering the corners of his eyes.

(He has very kind eyes...)

Kuga: “Our power has been growing in the past few years.”

Kuga: “There have been detours, and there are still numerous problems, but I feel honored to hear such words from you.”

Kuga: “Come on, Kagari, say something too. Your friend is praising your efforts, you know?”

Kagari glanced up for a moment before opening his mouth.

Kagari: “The security in the center is relatively good. We can ensure at least a minimum level of safety for tourists.”

Kagari: “But that’s safety by Kougyoku standards. If you’re not vigilant, the damage will increase.”

Kagari: “There’s still no sign of the war settling down across Kougyoku as a whole. The current situation is far from peaceful.”

Kagari: “I hope the reality is not too far removed from the safety you imagine.”

~Flashback~

Kagari: “Children are more valuable than adults. Depending on how they are raised, they can become strong assets in battle.”

Keith: “Kagari.”

Kagari: “It’s a common occurrence in Kougyoku. There’s no need to hide it.”

~End Flashback~

The scene of a child nearly being kidnapped flashed in my mind, causing a twinge of pain in my chest.

(The townspeople live their lives understanding that they are in constant danger.)

(At the root of that must be their trust in King Kuga and Kagari.)

Otherwise, smiles that rival the cherry blossoms in full bloom wouldn’t exist.

Kuga: “Hey, Kagari.”

Kuga: “The Kingdom of Jade has been supporting the war-torn Kougyoku all this time. Don’t say things that create a troubling reaction.”

Kuga: “It’s true that our security isn’t great compared to other countries... no, it’s actually quite poor, that’s not wrong.”

Kuga: “However, I don’t think there’s anyone foolish enough to consider attacking you during your stay.”

(If something were to happen to the next king of Jade, Keith, it could mean the loss of support.)

Kuga: “Kagari, at least accept your friend’s words graciously.”

Kagari respectfully placed a hand on his chest and slightly bowed his head.

Kagari: “I am very grateful for Your Highness’s words.”

Kuga: “Honestly, you’re a difficult one to manage, no matter when.”

Kagari: “It’s easier than managing someone troublesome.”

Kuga: “You’re someone who always has a comeback, quite unlovable.”

Despite his words, King Kuga’s expression was calm.

(It feels like there’s no gap between the two of them... as if they’ve known each other for a long time.)

(Just how much time have they spent together?)

(Oh... wait.)

I suddenly noticed that Keith, next to me, was watching them with a slight softening at the corners of his eyes.

A warm heat spread in my chest from the feelings conveyed by his profile.

(A defection from the royal family wouldn’t happen without a substantial reason.)

(I can’t help but wonder what happened with Kagari... I think he’s been worried for a long time.)

The relationship between Kagari and King Kuga might be one of the reasons Keith came to Kougyoku. I hoped that even a little, Keith’s worries would be alleviated...

The audience with King Kuga ended without incident.

Kuga: “…Kagari.”

After Keith and Emma left, Kuga’s troubled voice called to Kagari.

Kuga: “Was it really a bad move to invite the future king of Jade right now?”

Kagari: “Don’t worry. No matter what choice I make, as long as I’m here, it will go as planned.”

Kagari: “You’ve known that from the beginning, haven’t you?”

Kagari: “...”

Kagari: “However, the timing might not have been great for him.”

~Later~

Azel: “Kougyoku is so splendid in everything.”

As countless lanterns began to light up, the friendly gathering commenced.

On a large table, lavish dishes and drinks were laid out close together, while laughter and conversation blossomed in various spots.

Azel, a man with shining silver hair and eyes that seemed to hold the night sky, paid no mind to the countless gazes directed at him as he picked up a flower dumpling with his chopsticks and brought it to his mouth.

Azel: “The taste is just as beautiful as its appearance, and I can’t stop eating.”

Azel: “Each dish is quite rare to me, but I already feel a sense of familiarity with dorayaki.”

Azel: “To use the friendly gathering as an excuse to make most of the desserts dorayaki...”

Azel: “The obsession with dorayaki could be seen as an abuse of power. Truly, that’s classic Kagari.”

Matias: “.....”

Azel: “Matias, aren’t you eating? It’s disrespectful to the chef not to eat the food while it’s hot.”

Standing beside Azel, Matias, a man with golden hair that seemed to collect the twilight light and snow-blue eyes, continued to stare at a single point.

The glass of alcohol in his hand had not been touched.

Azel: “What are you looking at so seriously... Ah, I see.”

Azel lost interest in an instant and began to eat a spring roll with a crisp sound.

At the end of Matias's gaze were two participants: a man and a woman. The woman spoke earnestly, while the man nodded along, casually fixing her disheveled hair.

When he pulled her gently to avoid bumping into other participants, he kept his arm around her waist and listened attentively to her talk.

Although the man's face was not visible, the lovely scene exuded warmth even from afar.

(Sometimes I feel like someone is watching me)

Matias: “They look like a couple embodying happiness.”

Matias: “My fiancée will also speak with such a lively expression about things she’s seeing for the first time.”

Matias: “And she’ll blush and get flustered after talking too much. That adorable figure makes me unable to...”

Azel: “Uh-huh, I see, I see.”

While giving a casual nod, Azel took a bite of a steamed dumpling—his gaze returning to the couple.

His eyes narrowed slightly, as if discerning something...

Azel: “They do look happy, don’t they?”

Azel: “Hm...?”

At that moment, the man nearby received two glasses from a passing attendant.

Azel and Matias: “Oh...” “He is...”

Keith: “Yes, Emma. I think this one is light on alcohol and easy to drink.”

Emma: “Thank you very much.”

Emma: “Mmm... It’s delicious! The single cherry blossom petal floating in it adds a nice touch.”

(I must have been thirsty, and he must have noticed.)

(I probably got a bit carried away in the conversation with the Chief Medical Officer... it's embarrassing to think back on it.)

(But discussing the combinations of herbs that yield effects equivalent to rare medicinal herbs, and the history of traditional Chinese medicine...)

(It was a truly meaningful time. I should make sure to summarize it in my notebook later.)

I tilted the glass to moisten my throat and looked over the lively venue.

(Over there are the merchants from Benitoite and Jade...)

(The person nearby, judging by the decorations on their dress, is likely a participant from Tanzanite.)

As expected at a friendly gathering held in Kougyoku, there were many people in kimonos, among them, there were a few people dressed similarly to us. That scene sparked more curiosity than the parties I usually attend.

(I guess the reason I'm feeling so self-conscious is because members of the Jade royal family, including Keith, are present.)

I recalled how the Jade nobles and merchants had greeted Keith with expressions of surprise.

(Oh....)

Suddenly, a woman in a kimono passed right in front of me, and I was captivated by her elegance.

(The more I look at kimonos, the more beautiful they become.)

Not only are the colors and delicate embroidery stunning, but I also learned from a book that there’s a joy in changing the patterns to match the seasons and events.

Keith seemed to show interest too, as his gaze was directed toward the kimono.

Emma: “The kimono is wonderful, isn’t it?”

Keith: “Yeah. The atmosphere changes depending on the angle you view it from. You can really sense what the craftsman wanted to express.”

Keith: “I imagine you would look incredibly beautiful in a kimono, Emma.”

Emma: “Me?”

I was surprised, and Keith nodded with a gentle smile.

Keith: “I’ve thought that every time I saw a kimono.”

Keith: “When I see it in person, I doubt I’ll be able to meet your eyes or have the confidence to say anything due to its beauty.”

(I had no idea he had such reasons for looking so intently at them...)

I tightened my lips to avoid letting them slacken in a silly smile.

Emma: “I want to see you in a kimono too, Keith.”

Keith: “Me?”

Emma: “Yes! I want to wear my first kimono with you.”

Keith: “Being in a kimono together with you... sounds incredibly appealing.”

Keith: “However, I wonder if there’s a kimono that would suit someone like me...”

Keith: “Something with patterns of weeds or mushrooms, perhaps?”

Emma: “I’m curious to see how cute that would look, but I can’t help but worry about how the mean Keith would react.”

Keith: “Indeed. It seems I would certainly be forced to choose again without question.”

Which option should I choose?

I might also be interested if it has patterns of weeds or mushrooms.

How about something simple and plain?

What about one with a deer pattern?

Emma: “How about one with a deer pattern?”

Emma: “I think it would bring out a subtle cuteness, just like your outfit, Keith.”

Keith: “Matching the crest, huh? Yeah, that sounds good. I’ll make my first kimono have a deer pattern.”

Keith: “You always thought the deer crest was cute, Emma.”

Emma: “Ah... actually, I did think so.”

(Just the fact that it’s the same as Keith’s crest makes me reach for anything with a deer design or picture.)

(I’ve come to really like deer.)

Keith: “I’ve never felt so strongly that I was glad to have been given this crest when I was born.”

Keith: “I’m glad it’s a deer...”

(In Keith's mind, I’ve become someone who genuinely loves deer.)

??? “Keith.”

Suddenly, an unfamiliar voice calls out. As I turned around with Keith, I saw two men standing, bearing countless gazes.

From their bearing and the noble air surrounding them, it was obvious they belonged to high ranks—royalty.

(From their attire, they seem to be from Tanzanite and Achroite...)

Keith: “Azel and Matias?!”

(Those names mean...)

(The living deity from Tanzanite and the first prince of Achroite?!)

Azel: “It’s been a while since we met like this.”

Matias: “I didn’t expect you to be at the friendly gathering as well.”

Keith: “I honestly didn’t think you two would be here.”

(The first meeting with the prince of the most talked-about country is at a friendly gathering in Kougyoku...)

(And from their conversation, the three of them seem to know each other...?)

Amid my confusion, Keith looked at me apologetically.

Keith: “I’m sorry, Emma. I was so surprised that I delayed the introduction.”

Keith: “This is...”

Azel: “I am Azel Radwan from Tanzanite.”

Matias: “I am Matias Asbrink, the first prince of Achroite.”

Emma: “I’m Emma. It’s an honor to meet you.”

Keith: “She is my fiancée.”

Azel: “Yes, we’ve heard plenty about her.”

Azel: “Prince Keith’s love for his fiancée has everyone around here experiencing daily sugar overload and indigestion.”

Azel: “It sounds (hellish) heavenly.”

(I wonder if it’s my imagination. Did I just hear overlapping words...?)

Matias: “I too aim to be a couple like you, sharing the happiness cultivated with my future bride with others.”

Matias: “Thank you for showing me your affectionate side earlier.”

Keith: “Uh, you’re welcome?”

(I'm hearing that someone wants the Licht treatment)

Keith: “Matias, you’re engaged now...”

Azel: “He is not.”

(? But a future bride...)

In contrast to my puzzled thoughts, Keith narrowed his eyes as if he understood.

Keith: “Oh, I see. It’s good to see you’re still you, Matias.”

(I suppose I’ll just accept that Matias doesn’t have a fiancée but does have a future bride.)

Keith: “Emma, you know that Jade is actively trading with Tanzanite, right?”

Emma: “Yes.”

Keith: “I often correspond with Azel regarding that trade.”

Azel: “It’s a country where plants don’t grow easily, so we rely heavily on food imports from Jade.”

Keith: “I met Matias when I did a short-term study abroad at the Royal School of Achroite.”

Matias: “Outstanding in grades and classroom behavior. He was a valuable student who didn’t cause any notable problems during his study abroad.”

Matias: “When I meet with the teachers, your seriousness regarding studies still comes up in conversation.”

Keith: “I was just desperate because I was less adept than other kids, that’s all.”

Keith: “And I was simply shy and nervous, using studying as an escape... Haha.”

Emma: “I see...! Please tell me more about it next time.”

(I want to know more about Keith's school days... I need to hold back.)

I suppressed the urge to lean forward with excitement over the new information about Keith.

(But more importantly right now...)

I looked again at Azel and Matias.

(Kougyoku is currently divided among three major factions.)

(So, I didn’t know which faction formed the three country alliance, but...)

The fact that the princes from two nations are attending this friendly gathering significantly raises the possibility that Kuga’s faction has formed an alliance.

(If they really have formed an alliance, then inviting Keith to the friendly gathering was to convey that?)

(But if that’s the case, a letter would suffice, so that wouldn’t explain why they wanted him to visit Kougyoku.)

(I wonder what other reason Azel and Matias have for being here besides attending the friendly gathering...)

(Why did Kagari invite Keith?)

As my questions multiplied and my thoughts began to deepen...

Kagari: “Dorayaki is good for thinking.”

Emma: “!? Oh, Kagari... good evening!”

(Someone needs to get him a louder bell)

I swallowed my almost overwhelming scream as Kagari suddenly appeared from the side. Keith placed his hand on my shoulder, subtly creating space between me and Kagari.

Keith: “Please don’t startle Emma, Kagari.”

Kagari: “I didn’t mean to surprise her.”

Kagari: “Lady Emma, I apologize. Here’s dorayaki as an apology.”

Emma: “Oh, thank you.”

As he offered me the basket, I carefully took one of the neatly wrapped, steaming dorayaki.

(Wow, it’s still warm. Freshly made!)

The warmth and sweet aroma emanating from the wrapping stirred my appetite.

Keith: “Wait, Kagari. What did you just say...?”

I tilted my head at Keith, who looked as if he had just heard something outrageous.

(I wonder if there was something surprising in that exchange...)

However, it wasn’t just Keith reacting this way...

Matias: “Kagari, even you sometimes use ‘-sama’ with others, huh?”

Azel: “I’m hearing this for the first time. I almost dropped my dumpling from my chopsticks.”

(That’s quite a statement.)

Kagari: “? I wouldn’t address a foreign royal bride without any honorific. Especially not in front of her partner.”

Keith, Azel, and Matias: “““Huuh?... ”””

Azel: “I didn’t expect to hear something logical from you, Kagari.”

Matias: “He might be more of a reasonable person than we think.”

Azel: “You, who is well aware of his daily intake of dorayaki, think so?”

Matias: “Please forget what I just said.”

(That’s quite a statement too.)

Kagari took a dorayaki from the basket and finished it in just a few seconds. Then he grabbed another one and popped it into his mouth.

None of the others seemed surprised by this sight; it appeared to be a normal occurrence for them.

(I had a feeling that he must really love dorayaki when I heard he runs a sweet shop with a variety of dorayaki.)

Kagari: “Keith, do you want to eat one?”

Keith: “No, I’m good for now. Thank you.”

Keith: “.....”

Keith: “Kagari.”

The lively atmosphere around us remained unchanged, but the air surrounding us shifted slightly.

Kagari: “What is it, Keith?”

Keith: “I didn’t know you had enough exchanges with Azel and Matias to invite them to this friendly gathering.”

Kagari: “Do you think I am leaving you out?”

Keith: “Of course not. I’m not a child.”

Matias: “Honestly... why does Kagari always say things in such a teasing manner?”

Azel: “Because it’s obvious. It’s to see your reaction and show it.”

(What does that mean...?)

Kagari: “Most of the people here are hearing about my connection to Azel for the first time.”

Kagari: “In a sense, tonight is like an information release.”

His cryptic words began to stir my heart.

Kagari: “Why don’t you join us?”

Kagari: “Join our alliance.”

(Jade joining the three-nation alliance...)

(...Is he serious?)

~Later~

Kagari: “You’re late. I’ve been waiting for you.”

[louroth]

so there’s a traitor among the ROs right? ….can i fix them? lou, can I fix them PLEASE-

Maybe, but not before it is too late.

[erosiism]

OBLIVION | YANDERE CROWN PRINCE X M!READER

prompt: very lazy (oblivious) reader x yandere crown prince who basically does everything for him. reader is clueless about his friends disappearing around him, historical setting where MC is a pampered son of a noble family 

character(s): yandere crown prince, lazy!reader

warnings(s): mild violence, yandere themes. still considered rather fluffy and sfw

note(s): male reader, second person, present tense, as far as this goes this guy is too green to be really called a yandere lol. his possessive and violence tendencies are not to be glorified regardless, loose use of magic, not beta read 

Your biggest enemy is hard work, and your favorite hobby is sleeping. You can’t help it—you are spoiled, no doubt about that, and because you got lucky enough to be born into a prestigious family who dotes on you. Your social life is almost non-existent, but ever since you were young, your friend has stuck next to you. 

Your friend, who happens to be a crown prince.

People say he’s scary. You doubt that highly—is His Highness Cassian not the one who has brought you sweet treats from young? Is he not the one who littered your skin with tiny kisses because he likes showing affection? Is he not the one who allows you to laze around or nap? Rumors tend to be untrue, and you feel almost sorry towards the prince for having to deal with that.

(“I heard that if you mess with him, His Highness has the ability to kill! Haven’t you heard the disappearances lately?”)

You asked the crown prince questions regarding the rumors. All you got was a surprised, flippant reply: kill? That’s ridiculous, [Name]. I haven’t even mastered my mana skills yet.

So you don’t trust the rumors. It makes sense for people to be jealous, after all: he’s the crown prince. He has objectively good looks, and he’s an amalgamation of everything someone would covet: wealth, prestige, brilliance, and skill.

“You slept in class again?” A voice tears you out of your thoughts. You’re lounging on the bench in the school garden, and your legs are propped up on the sides. Your bag is thrown loosely to the ground. Inwardly you wish you had the physical capability to be agile enough to scale up a tree—because god, the place up there looked amazing—but unfortunately, you didn’t.

You face him. Cassia raises an eyebrow, and his fingers reach out gingerly to touch your cheek gently. You don’t recoil. It’s become normal.

“I can see words imprinted on your face. How long did you sleep? Or rather, how long was your class?”

It takes a few moments for you to process the prince’s words, before you squint your eyes. There’s a red smear on his cheek that seems hastily wiped off. It’s not too obvious, not to others, anyways, but you’re so used to Cassian's face looking normal that you immediately notice it.

“What’s that red thing on your face?” You ignore the question. You know that he can guess the answer.

“…Red thing?” Cassian immediately narrows his eyes, pausing. His fingers leave your face and go to his own. It looks like blood; which is odd, and definitely not possible.

“Is that…” you mull it over for a second. It can’t be blood. Or lipstick.

Cassian, though having received multiple marriage proposals, didn’t seem to be settling down any time soon. 

Strange, it doesn’t even seem like he likes women. So the only plausible thing is—

“—were you drinking tomato soup earlier?”

Cassian blinks his eyes, before a look of realization dawns on his face. And if you see correctly, there’s almost the tiniest hint of relief. Cassian’s lips tug up into a smile—he laughs, the prince laughs, the sound bright and mirthful and irrevocably fond. Your parents have teased you once about the prince nursing a crush on you. But this is how he has treated you for as long as you can remember.

“Tomato?”

“Looks like a tomato,” You furrow your eyebrows. “Hey, do they serve tomato soup in the academy? I really want tomato soup. It’s easy to drink, and…”

“I’ll get you some later,” Cassian says affectionately. He ruffles your hair, and you relax. “Don’t worry too much, alright?”

You shrug loosely. “Alright.”

.

.

[ before ]

He stares at the dead body on the ground. There aren’t a lot of rumors of you, but your laziness is well known. Some see it fondly, almost endearingly, but there are the rare few who view you with disdain because of your apparent lack of diligence.

Caspian doesn’t like that. He’s fine with rumors of his own—but of you? But of sweet, innocent, lovely you? He loathes it.

“Stop talking,” he smiles. “…You can do that, can’t you? After all, you’re already dead.”

A head lolls about and blood drips off a blade.

What, Cassian thinks with that sweet softness he has reserved for you, smiling gently, should I get for [Name] today?

shitpost since i had this lying around. lowkey cringe

[foone]

Games are kinda weird as a creative medium because it's one of the few where it's possible to be incredibly incompetent at one of the major parts of it (the programming) and it not be noticeable in the end product.

Like, if you're a musician who can't sing or play your instruments worth a damn, that definitely comes across in the final product, no matter how good you are at lyrics or composing.

Making a movie? It doesn't matter how great the script is, if your performers can't act and your cameraman doesn't know which end points towards the action, your movie is going to be noticeably bad.

But games? There are games that have sold a bunch of copies, developed by one person, with brilliant game design, highly playable, not noticeably buggy, but if you look inside them it'll turn out it's just absolute dogshit. They barely are holding up against the strain of just existing.

The kind of game that when the sequel comes out, they just throw it all out instead of reusing any code, because it's all so terrible that it'd be more work to adapt any of it than to just burn it.

That happens so often. But you would never guess it from just playing it. Like, if you think about "badly programmed games" you get things like "skyrim", which is just... Not exactly right.

Skyrim has lots of bugs but that's because it's trying to do so much. It's simulating a huge world with so much interactivity and so many complex interacting systems, that it's almost inevitable that it'll have weird glitches. It'd take so much playtesting and careful bug fixing to make that game glitchless, and they clearly did not do that. The game is known for glitches, but not crashing (unless modded), suggesting their QA approach was "weird unexpected stuff can happen, but the game must continue working".

Or Pokémon red/blue! That game is so glitchy, with so many bugs, but a lot of that is that it is just stuffing way too much game on a tiny cartridge. Its only failing is that of Icarus: it flew too high, too close to the sun, it did too much.

Skyrim and Pokémon gen1 are examples of amazingly coded games, even if they have their glitches.

But there's games that seem to work just fine that are held together with toothpicks and duct tape, at best. They're immensely fragile, and they only work at all because the crash bugs were fixed, painfully and slowly, far more painfully than they would have been if the program had just been designed correctly in the first place.

Just absolute disasters of game programming, but then those games go on to be critically acclaimed and start entire mini-genres because of how influential they were on certain gaming niches.

But you'd never know! That's the weird thing to me.

[coreene]

Asking Astarion permission for Halsin

As far as I can tell from the flags, this option should appear regardless if it's spawn or ascended Astarion and it doesn't matter if it's before or after Cazador fight.

Player: You wouldn't believe the conversation I've just had with Halsin... Astarion: Ah, ha ha ha, I was wondering when you were going to ask me about this. Player: It's all right with you? You don't sound fazed... Astarion: The druid is unique. He has a lot of experience with this type of arrangement. Thus, I'm sure it would be quite a harmless affair.

This is the continuation of the above conversation. See how it ends with "jump to node 853". If I understand it correctly node 138 and the following dialogue happens when this conversation happens after Cazador fight.

Astarion: I guessed. The man can't stay quiet about 'enjoying the freedom of Nature's gifts'. I bet he'd outlaw clothing if he could. Player: I wouldn't even consider it if it bothered you. Astarion: I trust you to make choices that are not going to hurt what we have. 1. Player: I want to see what happens with him. Astarion: Honestly, so do I. What an adventure for you! 2. Player: I care for you a great deal. That's never changing. Astarion: After all this, I've realised it's all right if it does change. If anything changes. 3. Player: I don't know what lies ahead, but I trust you, too. Astarion: You're lucky I'm such an open-minded person.

This is the conversation I think majority of us has seen in the game. This conversation happens when you ask Astarion for permission before Cazador fight.

Astarion: I'm happy for you to have as much Halsin as you wish - but I do have one question. It's not because... you know... we haven't... in a while? 1. Player: Gods, I don't want you to think that for a moment. Astarion: I know I was being foolish. But thank you for saying it. 2. Player: I've admired Halsin for a while, that's all it is. Astarion: I'm fairly sure the only one in the camp who hasn't is Withers, but even with him one can never be certain. Even jerky was meat once. 3. Player: He propositioned me out of nowhere - I just want to see where it goes. Astarion: What hovel were you living in, that you didn't see this coming back in the grove? Honestly. But that's fine. devnote: affectionately 4. Player: What I have with you is wholly different and very special to me. Astarion: Aww. 5. Player: I don't want you to feel bad, but I have felt frustrated. Astarion: Oh. Well, you would. Wouldn't you? It makes sense.

This is the end note. As far as I can tell, all of the nodes above will come down to this, so this is what he'll always say when he gives his permission.

Astarion: Go right on with Halsin. Far be it from me to hold your hunger against you. devnote: genuine about it

Been meaning to post this for a while (like six months, oops). A conversation in discord came up, reminding me that I never did so, I finally got to post all of it.

[blossomthepinkbunny]

I wanna talk about the pride artwork for HB, because like a lot of other people I have some thoughts.

Firstly, positives:

It overall looks pretty good imo. The colours are bright and the picture has nice energy. I don't mind the HB/HH artstyle in general, it's mostly the designs that are the problem (the designs in HB are better than in HH). It is very cluttered, but I sorta learned to deal with that and I don't mind as much here.

Millie being there for Moxxie is cute and she looks amazing.

The outfits for some of the characters look good.

Sallie May being a Lesbian is nice (idk why, it just is).

Verosika looks great and very pretty (as always).

I like the idea of Loona taking Octavia to her first Pride parade. I like the idea of them hanging out in general and I want to see more of that.

Beelzebub looks cute.

I like the face Barbie makes (idk either).

Now onto the things I don't like:

Some of these sexualities seem kinda like they were just made up on the spot. Loona being Bisexual is nice, but she literally only ever showed interest in guys and there was never anything that could lead us to assume that she's Bi. The same thing goes for Mammon or Andrealphus. For Andrealphus it seems like they just made him gay to excuse the weird comments he makes about his Sister and especially since a lot of people started using their weird relationship to imply that Stella has some problems as well and isn't just a heartless bitch. Now they can basically just say: "Andrealphus isn't weird towards Stella, he is literally gay, why would he harrass her". I don't mind as much with characters like Bee or Barbie, because they only showed up once and it would've been pretty difficult to confirm their sexualities.

A lot of people mentioned Mammon being Ace just seems like an excuse to not put him in sexual merchandise or something. He is the only fat character in HB (who is actually relevant) and he is one of the two ace characters. It feels sorta disingenuous when the only two ace characters are a teen and the single fat character you have. Especially since, if I remember correctly there were a lot of people (including me) who found Mammon attractive and were looking forward to more sex-positivity for plus sized folks, especially when in Vivzepops shows theres only him and Mimzy (Adam as well maybe).

Why do a lot of the pansexual demons in this show feel stereotypical. Bee and Asmodeus are fine, the background demons as well I guess. Blitzø is super horny all the time and could fill a whole party just with people he slept with. Verosika and her followers are succubi who we saw sexually assault Moxxie. Barbie Wire manipulated a teenage/barely legal human to do what she wants by using her body. And Chaz is a literal and very open sexual harrasser/abuser. The only joke he has are making unwanted sexual remarks toward Moxxie and being horny. He has a sign that says: "I will fuck anything", which isn't what pansexuality is and the wording makes it really weird ("anything" not "anybody"). And he looks at Andrealphus weirdly. Him and Blitzø are also naked for no reason.

I would've loved to see some nonbinary/genderfluid/genderqueer characters. We don't have one confirmed genderqueer character. How about nonbinary Octavia or Vasago. Or genderfluid Moxxie. Or bigender Barbie or something. I just wished we had anything like that. Also a personal headcannon of mine, but Asmodeus should probably be Polyamorous. He is the incarnation of Lust and with how they wrote him in the show it's kinda hard to believe/doesn't make sense that he is in a monogamous relationship.

Where are Mayberry and Martha? They were confirmed to be sapphic and so far they're the only sapphic characters in an actually sapphic relationship we see in HB. Why does Wally get to be there but they aren't? Why is Vasago there instead of them, when he hasn't even showed up in an episode yet? Why is Vasago there in general? It's not like i'm gonna be happy with him being confirmed to be gay because there is nothing we know about him yet.

Why is Tex not there? Did they just forget him? He might be straight but he could still be there to support his girlfriend and isn't he literally Verosikas bodyguard. He was at the weird Blitzø hate party with her, but not here?

Isn't Chaz dead?

Why would Asmodeus and Fizz go to the same parade as Mammon, when the only episode with Mammon so far has dealt with how much he hurts Fizz.

You might say: "This isn't supposed to make sense, it's just a more interesting way to confirm characters' sexuality for pride month, so it doesn't have to make canon/logical sense". Which I would agree with, if they didn't excuse Stella and Striker (two pretty important characters) not being there by saying something along the lines of: "Do you really think they would attend a pride parade?". Maybe not, but I also don't think Chaz would attend a parade, being dead and all. I also don't think that Barbie would go out of her way to go to hell, just to attend a pride parade, especially since her brother is there too. I also don't think Andrealphus would go out of his way to go to a parade filled with imps and people he doesn't like. I also don't think Mammon would be there because it's nothing that brings him money or something. Stella might be straight and that's the reason she isn't here. But her brother (who she seemingly likes and confines in) is there and she could go to support him and her being straight isn't even confirmed, so she could very well be queer. And isn't Striker queer as well? Im sorta confused with that, because they try to make him a bigot (probably also homophobic), but the scene he has with Blitzø in "Harvest moon festival" seems very queer. His offense at sexual remarks could also imply that he is a very sex-repulsed asexual or Demisexual or something. Unless of course they want to use the fact that he doesn't like sexual remark from men as a way to make him seem homophobic (even though him reacting bad to unwanted sexual remarks doesn't mean he's bigoted, like that's well within his rights to be uncomfortable). It's not as if Viv shows restraint with making villians/antagonists queer in general. Mammon, Chaz, Andrealphus are all antagonists in HB and are also there. In HH they literally went out of their way to confirm Vox being in a relationship with Valentino, a rapist. It seems like being Straight/Bigoted/too much of an asshole to show up only applies to the characters who actively dislike Stolas and to the only main female antagonist.

[mollywog]

What are your thoughts on Possibility of Peeta in Canon feeling guilt over a perception that he forced Katniss into the Star crossed lovers?

Oooo -Thank you for giving me an opportunity to talk about this.

One of Peeta’s main survival tactics is his ability to read people and situations…. And he’s pretty good at it (which probably was helpful to him far before the arena with a volatile mother but that’s maybe more the stuff of HCs so moving on)

With that in mind:

One of the first things Peeta says to Katniss upon her discovering him in the arena is:

"Lean down a minute first," he says. "Need to tell you something." I lean over and put my good ear to his lips, which tickle as he whispers. "Remember, we're madly in love, so it's all right to kiss me anytime you feel like it."

Even in his fevered state, Peeta is aware that this is an act (at least on Katniss’s side)

Later - when he’s trying to convince Katniss not to go to the feast and she claims that she isn’t, he says:

"You're such a bad liar, Katniss. I don't know how you've survived this long." He begins to mimic me. "I knew that goat would be a little gold mine. You're a little cooler though. Of course, I'm not going." He shakes his head. "Never gamble at cards. You'll lose your last coin," he says.

‘I knew that goat would be a little gold mine. You're a little cooler though. Of course, I'm not going.’ -> all moments he (accurately) clocked where Katniss wasn’t being 100% honest if not outright lying

The ‘I don’t know how you’ve survived this long’ part is particularly interesting to me but I digress.

So then fast forward to after the feast where Katniss risked her life to save him:

"No! Just don't, Katniss!" His grip tightens, hurting my hand, and there's real anger in his voice. "Don't die for me. You won't be doing me any favors. All right?"

I'm startled by his intensity but recognize an excellent opportunity for getting food, so I try to keep up. "Maybe I did it for myself, Peeta, did you ever think of that? Maybe you aren't the only one who ... who worries about ... what it would be like if ..."

I fumble. I'm not as smooth with words as Peeta. And while I was talking, the idea of actually losing Peeta hit me again and I realized how much I don't want him to die. And it's not about the sponsors. And it's not about what will happen back home. And it's not just that I don't want to be alone. It's him. I do not want to lose the boy with the bread

"If what, Katniss?" he says softly.

I wish I could pull the shutters closed, blocking out this moment from the prying eyes of Panem. Even if it means losing food. Whatever I'm feeling, it's no one's business but mine.

"That's exactly the kind of topic Haymitch told me to steer clear of," I say evasively, although Haymitch never said anything of the kind. In fact, he's probably cursing me out right now for dropping the ball during such an emotionally charged moment. But Peeta somehow catches it.

"Then I'll just have to fill in the blanks myself," he says, and moves in to me.

In this moment Katniss inwardly acknowledges that she has real feeling beyond the act and Peeta, again, reads those feelings correctly.

This is the turning point for him.

So, then imagine his surprise on the train tracks (and all the self doubt):

"It was all for the Games," Peeta says. "How you acted."

"Not all of it," I say, tightly holding on to my flowers.

"Then how much? No, forget that. I guess the real question is what's going to be left when we get home?" he says.

(Just picture Peeta replaying the games in his head and trying to figure out where he missed the tell.)

We often joke about Peeta being oblivious to Katniss’s feelings for him in Catching Fire, but really: He’s been burned by ‘misinterpreting’ her before and he’s trying not to make the same ‘mistake’ again.

In a way

“You love me. Real or not real?

Is a remnant of that doubt.

Anyways - back you your original question:

There wasn't a single person in Panem expecting the Gamemakers to allow for two winners prior to the rule change... 73 years of one Victor: It's unprecedented.

The star-crossed lovers strategy, under normal game circumstances,

Benefits them both. The romance makes them both fan favorites to sponsors. But, at the end of the day, there can only be one Victor. So when one were to die, public sympathy would swing sponsors towards the broken hearted other.

Relied very little on Katniss; she didn't have to opportunity to state her feelings for Peeta to the audience after the interview and in the arena, up until the rule change, she barely saw him. Had he died before the (unprecedented) rule change, there wouldn’t be much for her to do but appear sad. The star-crossed lover but is eventually just a sound bite.

No one could have predicted that both Katniss and Peeta would be crowned victors and have to maintain the strategy indefinitely.

So yes, on top of believing he mistook Katniss’s feelings for him in the arena, he then discovered they’d have to maintain the pretense of lovers for the rest of their lives… I’m sure he felt all sorts of miserable ways about that.

[movingthisblogcelestialtarot11]

Small astro observations ☕️🤍

• Those with cancer moon in the 1st house come across “witchy,” some may even describe them as moody or reserved. There’s a certain kind of witchyness in them that I like 👀 my best friend has this placement, and she knows how to read peoples energy just by looking at them. I believe that’s her source of witchyness.

• She also has a youthful, round face. Being ruled by moon, her features are softer and delicate.

• Also, her moon is in Leo. This astrological polarity creates lots of unique sides in the native. Other people may think of these sides as “contradictory,” but the native can be very deep as a person. They explore all parts of themselves, and if they haven’t, part of their mission in their lifetime is to embrace all aspects of themselves, regardless of what others think.

• Jupiter in Leo people don’t chase that bag 💅🏻 they CREATE. They do enjoy when others buy things for them and when men especially (if the woman has this placement) provide for them financially. Men with this placement don’t like to rely on others for money, their pride comes with having a lot of money under their belt.

• Pluto in the 2nd house goes through radical financial changes. Whether that’s due to an issue with being careless with their money, to an event happening outside of them that causes them to struggle financially. The native does not feel secure financially and feels worried. Depending on the aspects in the natives chart, they can attract abundance just as easily as they lost their bag 💅🏻

• Earth mercuries and leaving their phone on DND, or ignoring notifications to preserve their peace 😌👋 hi ya’ll.

• A capricorns loyalty is not one to be messed with, especially if the native has healed past wounds, and is self aware. They have the ability to hold themselves accountable and do better. However, I’ve noticed capricorns who haven’t worked through their past issues have no problem leaving you to struggle, and only coming back when they need help.

• Male capricorns, if your father figure was not structured and present emotionally, do yourself a favor and go to therapy ☕️🤷🏻‍♀️ it’ll help you tons. Especially those with Saturn retrograde in the chart, because Saturn represents the father. If the natives sun placement is afflicted, the same applies here.

• I knew a guy with Saturn in the 10th house retrograde definitely had daddy issues growing up, and still does. The father relies on his child to be cared for, instead of the other way around. The father finds himself struggling to provide basic living, so the child takes on the stress of providing for the parent at a young age.

• Virgo placements & libra…what’s up with wanting to be hidden? I’ve met a man who at the time was struggling mentally, was borderline checking out of reality. He couldn’t hold a proper conversation without his head being lost in some far land 🤣 every topic was too vague, and too abstract for it to make sense. And as soon as I asked his placement and guessed it correctly, he gave me a look and said he didn’t like what I knew of him. He was bothered and seen 👀

• Virgo venus, ya’ll females are so beautiful. Even though venus doesn’t like it here, there’s something so beautiful, and effortless about these individuals. They may have a mature look depending on their other placements, and aspects.

Thats all I have! Thank you all for reading and supporting 👋☺️ this was fun to create. Feel free to add on and share your thoughts!

Book a reading with me here 🤍

[cerastes]

Was Wisadel's backlash at all comparable to the Chalter incident and do you think it would be enough to make them ignore her for a bit, or do you expect them to give her a skin on the more normal schedule for limiteds? I know there are a lot of complaints that even went beyond gameplay stuff (like being a limited alter of a limited) but I generally shut out the community when it gets super annoying so have no clue how big the stink actually got.

As far as I know, there was no backlash for Wisadel, but I’ve also not had my finger on the Arknights pulse as of late, so maybe I missed it, but, again, as far as I know, there wasn’t anything like with Chung the Hung, which makes sense, all things considered, because Chung didn’t get her backlash due to being overpowered, it was a molotov cocktail of factors which included being overpowered. Wisadel had some complaints, such as what you mentioned — limited alternate of a limited — but nothing much beyond what limiteds get.

Wisadel as a while evades the Chung trappings:

Regardless of your opinion on her actual design, Wisadel’s artwork is of good quality. It’s proportionate, well drawn, stylish, the whole deal. Ch’en the Holungday famously had really awful E2 art.

Wisadel is overpowered, but she’s a character that’s been ingrained in the narrative since day one and this “upgrade” is tied to her actual growth and role in the main story. Ch’en was overpowered, but while you can make an argument her growth is part of it (since it’s offhandedly mentioned in her Files, I guess), it’s tied to an overall filler summer event, has her in a literal swimsuit, firing a jury rigged Super Soaker for more damage than several of her contemporaries could manage combined per shot, all while having three Skills that were all basically the same and S3 being the best one by far, which also used the Ammo mechanic so you could have insane practical upkeep on it. Comparatively, Wisadel actually has three distinct Skills, which leads to the next point:

Wisadel is actually entertaining and satisfying to look at: The bombardment S2, the huge death beam explosion of S3, the graphics, the sound effects, the sprite animations, Wisadel has actual flair. Ch’en the Holungday is painfully boring to play and look at, all Skills have the same animations, the same dull sound effect, no variation or flair. Her skin definitely helped on the flair department, like 3 years later.

Though you could (correctly) argue that Wisadel might also be doing this for limited alts of limiteds, Ch’en was setting a very awful precedent: Overpowered Summer Units, maybe even Overpowered Seasonal Units, a hallmark of trashy gacha design. Hypergryph had tested the waters with other scummy strategies before — the period of time in which Thorns and Surtr, AKA stupid strong characters, among others, were rapid fire releases with no accompanying lore or event to give them a place in the world the way others have, which haunts them to this day as ‘lorelets’ — so Ch’en In A Bikini Godtier didn’t sit well either.

Wisadel wasn’t the only good unit out of her banner; regardless of your personal take on Mizuki as a unit, he was widely agreed to be, and thus, perceived as a nothingburger of a 6*, and La Pluma, who is definitely a good unit but was a new archetype at that time, so people were cautious with her, so there was a clear winning roll and losing roll. Wisadel was joined by 6* Logos, who could easily be the limited 6* in any other banner, and 5* Fang, a highly anticipated character. Overall, the perception of these banners could not have been more different.

The overtuning of Ch’en is but one in a cocktail of complaints people had for her, basically. Any complaints there were over Wisadel were a fraction of what Ch’en got.

[akascow]

fave jayvik hc so far is that jayce knew how to make a rlly good leg brace from basically scraps bc he helped in designing and crafting viktor's own brace🫠👍🏻

^^ "scraps" is kinda mirroring them probably having to make mock ups and test runs while trying to perfect viktor's brace so there were a bunch of prototypes with random parts they had lying around trying to make it work ahaaaa

like obviously jayce is extremely talented and smart when it comes to engineering so he very easily coulda come up w the design and mechanics of it on the spot (meaning using what he had on hand, rather than actually coming up with it in a few hours bc,, well he was down there for at least a few weeks HAHA) but idk its nice to think about i guess lmfao

plus itd make a lil bit of sense, like why go somewhere else to get a leg brace when your perfectly capable and willing partner is right here lmfao.

also we only see viktor has the leg brace after working with jayce. and yeah u could chalk it up to his illness getting worse so he wouldntve needed it until now. and obviously im not trying to ignore the fact that viktor is extremely capable to make it himself and if he did maybe since hes more than an assistant he actually has the tools and means to make it himself now lol.

but idk it seems like jayce was one of the first if not only person to care about V and include him in things ("people didnt believe in me, a poor disabled kid from the undercity" "i dont want to spend my whole life as an assistant" "our hextech dream" "arent you the professor's assistant" "you should be up there with me" etc) so i can totally picture him see viktor working on it or even a glance at a few crude sketches as a start and want to help his partner yk?

and from what we see hes like extremely nice and caring and at the risk of this sounding too fluffy bc thats not the point rn you can picture viktor walking around the lab, jayce noticing him wincing whenever he tries to correct his position and offering to help him with a mobility aid and they have all the means necessary to build it right here right now and shit happens and here we are now lol

hes constantly making an effort to show and tell people that hextech is not JUST his doing, but viktor's too. which, as someone who seemed to revel in the attention, jayce easily could've forgotten to mention, but never does

so in my head it makes sense that he would be the first person to propose the idea of helping him in creating a leg brace that would make walking a lil less painful (it keeps his foot straight, u can see he has to correct the angle himself in s1 act1)

anyway i think its a neat theory lmao

these didnt fit in anywhere else so im put it it here pft👇🏻

also jayce has two different braces- during and post anomaly. so while there may just be some place in piltover that makes them i’d like to think he just whipped it up all quicklike in his lab the second he got back bc like.. the blueprints are right there lol

his and viktor’s arent entirely similar ofc bc they serve two different functions,, viktors helps to keep his leg/foot facing and moving foward, and jayces kinda just stabilizes/supports his leg i think ? uh but they both help in general to reduce pain

n then viktor, having a leg that didnt develop akin to typical human anatomy, is clearly shown as not the easiest to walk or put pressure in on lmao, especially when he only really got to correct it at like age 30, so like, habits (for lack of a better term) have already been deeply rooted in his posture by now lol

bc, well,, putting any weight on that fucked up Broken In Half shin bone that Definitely Did Not heal correctly (if its even fully healed at this point in the first place) probably causes a bunch of Ouch- hence the supports in the front of his leg,, post anomaly tho, during anomaly its at the sides which was probably just to straighten the injury while it was healing idk.

i cant find a good answer as to why the lower leg support is in the front now but my main guess is so it doesnt put too much strain when he bends his knee/ankle downward, which u can kinda see in ep8 when he blasts viktor and the knockback breaks the part resting on his shoe away, and its hard to see but i think his ankle bends slightly more after the gear breaks ? so thats what i can assume.

clearly im not well versed in the art of KAFO support braces and i tried to look up to the best of my abilities but came up empty handed HAHA who knew itd be so hard referencing similarities between the homemade parallel reality fictional sci fi gear braces and modern irl real orthotic braces LMAO

[illym]

I think this might be one of my favorites which I really shouldn't say when I've only read like 10. It's very funny.

Original & cleaned comics under the cut, along with details.

Translation assistance: @reunioninn

ID in alt.

original text below the comic:

Third comic I picked managed to hit me with what I assume to be wordplay. I tried to make sure the joke landed correctly.

-

All of the below is now moot, since the issue wasn't a pun or wordplay, but the format that Robo-Ky speaks in. He speaks exclusively in Katakana which translation software has trouble translating. Now that I know this, I'll hopefully be able to get it translated into 'regular' Japanese for more accurate translation.

In panel three, DeepL translated [ ソコニ 立ツナ! ] as [ There you go. Tuna! ]. When I checked a bit further, DeepL further defined it as [ canned tuna (from canned tuna standing on its own) ]. Two other sources defined it as [ rope, cord, line ] and [ to leave, to stand, to move oneself, to stand (up for something ]. All of the different definitions and the title led me to believe that it was a pun I couldn't understand.

I decided that using a 'direct' translation would... Just make it too nonsensical, especially since I wouldn't be able to explain the joke. Since the joke is that Anji is mistaking Robo-Ky as sleeping when he's actually doing something else, i decided that keeping the beginning of what Robo-Ky says [ there you go. ] would be a... decent compromise? I did the best that I could.

This is probably what'll feel iffiest about using translation software to translate these instead of doing it myself; I know that there's something I'm missing, and using context clues only gets so far when it's a pun or the like.

But on the other hand, there aren't many people translating these, and putting requests in to those people when there are so many comics I want to see translated is exceptionally selfish.

If anyone who understands Japanese personally wants to team up with me to translate these, I wouldn't say no.

If you have a better translation, or can explain what I missed here, send me an ask or a message with it and I'll either update the translation and update the credits with your username, or rewrite the dialogue that I changed the most to fit better with the original meaning.

The first version of this comic that I posted:

Leaving this in the post to keep a record. I think it was a decent guess, personally. But that's just me.

second version (it's so minor, but i felt it flowed better with 'just' so I HAD to fix it.)

[ticklishraspberries]

hi

I read your post about your courage to talk about tickling in therapy. And that you are thinking about sharing bits of it with us. ❤️‍🩹 If you feel comfortable? Please, do so. I started therapy a while ago, but haven’t had the courage or mental unloading level to talk about this chapter, tbh.

Hello!! I'm gonna use your ask as the place to talk about this, so yes, I really hope this can possibly be helpful to you and others!! This is mostly going to be about dealing with shame surrounding tickling and sort of...why I think it became a kink for me? Trigger warnings for mentions of grooming, sexual abuse, and pornography.

So, I grew up with unrestricted internet access as a child. My parents had no idea how to deal with growing technology, and they really didn't understand how to put child safety features on or how to even check the history, so I could pretty much do whatever I wanted.

From a very young age, I started experiencing the feeling that I thought about tickling differently than other people, but there wasn't really shame about it, I just knew that it...mattered more to me than others? I would describe it as more of a fixation, and now as an adult who has been diagnosed with autism, I'd say it might have something to do with that.

As a very young child, I would look up things about tickling, and I was immediately met with fetish content. Back in the early 2000's, even fanfiction was mostly sexual. Harry Potter ticklefics were all, like, an underage Hermione being non-consensually tickled by magical plants, or Voldemort or Snape using it to torture Harry.

As an impressionable child, I began to internalize the idea that this likely innocent interest in tickling was a dark, perverted sexual deviance and developed a debilitating sense of shame towards it. It's why the word would make me cringe, why I stopped letting my family do it to me, why I would feel disgusted and embarrassed when it happened in shows and movies.

Recently, my partner, our mutual best friend, and I had this very deep talk about fetishes. We all have one that we are deeply ashamed of (obviously I'm not going to share theirs) and both of them have never judged me for a single second about tickling. Whenever it happened in media we were watching, my friend expressed not knowing how to handle it for my sake, because I would very clearly get uncomfortable.

He encouraged me to really think about why it made me uncomfortable, especially in a room with 2 of the only people in my life who would never judge me for it, and I decided to take his advice and really dwell on it.

There had been a reason that I had to bring it up in therapy previously, it's a long and frankly far too personal story to share, but I had really danced around what it was and my therapist ended up asking if she could guess what I was talking about, and she correctly guessed that it was tickling. My therapist is super chill and comfortable talking about literally anything with me, and she didn't make me feel judged at all. In fact, she was like, "I think a lot of people find that hot as like, foreplay at least!" and fully promised me that it was normal and nothing to be ashamed of.

Basically, with a mixture of self-reflection, discussing it in therapy, and talking about it with my partner and our friend, I have come to this conclusion: Being exposed to tickling as a sexual fetish at such a young age, as a child with no prior concept of what sex was or consent or anything, I was conditioned by pornography and inappropiate fanfiction/fanart the believe that there is something perverted and predatory about me liking tickling.

As someone with sexual trauma that was occurring around the same age that I discovered these things online, seeing the constant non-consensual and underage elements in these things made me see myself in the same light as people who were abusing me.

The ironic thing about this is, tickling is not inherently sexual to me, but I never let myself experience it platonically until very recently, because I was convinced I could not separate the sexual aspect from the innocent fixation. Tickling between myself and my platonic friends, or just playful/romantic tickling with my partner is also fun for me, and it doesn't turn me on. But I really struggled to acknowledge that these things could coexist, because I only ever saw the sexual side of it at the most impressionable age.

I have really bad intrusive thoughts, and a lot of self-esteem issues that make it very hard for me to trust myself and view myself in a positive way, so my mentally ill brain essentially convinced me that I was perverted, that I was a predator, etc. for simply...liking tickling. Even though logically I can understand that I am not a bad person, I don't want to non-consensually tickle people, I value consent, all of those important things, I felt like there was just something inherently wrong about liking it, and so, while I have preached being comfortable with it on this blog, I didn't even realize how deeply I have hated myself for years for it.

That is one reason why I think this blog and this community have been therapeutic for me, and why I still rarely write NSFW fanfiction. Tickling is a kink for me, yes, but I can fully separate when a situation is sexual or not. Recently, I have been able to start healing this. The friend I mentioned earlier knows how I feel about tickling and is still comfortable with it happening between us, which has really helped me begin to view it as a fun/safe/platonic thing again, and I'm getting way better at not getting uncomfortable when it happens in media.

My therapist has suggested doing some deeper work on this, but I kind of feel like I got to the bottom of the problem and am already feeling a lot better about it. However, I'm sure it will come up again.

I just wanted to share this because I always said talking about tickling in therapy would be my worst nightmare, that I would never do it, etc. and it ended up being a really positive experience that has made me so much more comfortable in myself and liking tickling.

I hope this could be insightful or helpful to some of you!! Thanks if you read this far.

[evilkitten3]

I don't understand why Uchiha clan believed that Madara stole his brothers eyes and killed him... Haven't they saw that Izuna was mortally wounded by Tobirama?

they saw izuna badly wounded by tobirama, yes (well, the ones there that day did), but it's quite likely they weren't actually there when he died. we don't even know what exactly killed him - infection, blood loss, organ failure... no clue. most likely, only a handful of people were actually there when he passed, if anyone, and we'll probably never know.

the main reason for how this rumor started isn't ever stated, but it's certainly implied: madara's communication skills are dogshit. he doesn't trust people, he's distant and uncommunicative. he's also a bit of a quitter, socially. he doesn't believe in telling people things or sharing his side of the story bc as far as he's concerned they've all already made up their minds and it's pointless to try and change them, which leads to the gap between himself and his clan widening, which leads to him closing off, etc etc the cycle continues.

long post w/e a couple images below

according to hashirama, by the time izuna died, the war was pretty clearly going in the senju's favor. it's difficult to say how much of that can be blamed on who/what, but imo it's in large part due to the senju suddenly having a walking forest deity on their side. but from the uchiha's perspective, the on-and-off clan war that had been more or less even for however many years it had been going on was suddenly looking more and more unbalanced.

moreover, it's likely the uchiha's financial situation was starting to worsen as well. when we first meet tajima and izuna, both of them are wearing armor

but by the time hashirama and madara become heads of their clans, only izuna is

(couldn't find the manga version but i own the volume and this is more or less accurate)

it makes sense for tajima to prioritize himself and his sons, not even as a father but as a pragmatic clan head who knows one of them will succeed him. even madara (still can't find the image so i just took a picture with my phone, sorry for the poor quality)

you can't really tell in the first one but by the second it's pretty obvious - madara wore armor on the battlefield until he became clan head.

as i said, it made sense for tajima to armor selectively from a pragmatic standpoint, but it makes sense for madara as a character to forgo armoring himself at all, both bc he's deeply arrogant (and correctly so - the only person who really poses a threat to him is hashirama, and armor is only gonna help so much there) and bc i think he's the sort of person who wouldn't use a resource for himself and not his clan, especially if he didn't really think he needed it. that last bit is just my best guess, though.

so anyway i imagine the tide of the war turning combined with a worsening financial situation (each likely not helped by the other) had already primed the uchiha to view madara as a bad leader, regardless of how much of that was his fault.

so, here's what we know happened immediately pre-ceasefire:

-izuna is grievously injured -madara retreats from battle with izuna; several uchiha surrender to the senju -izuna dies and madara takes his eyes (unclear what order this happened in) -madara shows up to fight hashirama (+co but he doesn't care about them lol) by himself (note: it's possible that in the anime he brought other people with him, but in the manga madara is the only uchiha we see present during the pre-founding fight) -madara and hashirama agree to end the war

we don't know how madara broke this to the uchiha clan, we don't know how much they know of what actually happened. here's what the uchiha clan knows happened immediately pre-ceasefire:

-lord izuna is grievously injured -lord madara retreats from the battle, which likely means they lose, and several uchiha desert to the senju -lord madara, whose only (as far as we the readers know) heir has just died, fucks off to go fight the senju (presumably he at least told them he was going to go do this. i hope) -lord madara comes back and tells them the war is over and they're going to be building a village to share with the senju (or something along those lines) -at some point during all of this, lord madara ended up with lord izuna's eyes

whatever else they learned about the situation, madara would have had to tell them himself (with his words, in a conversation with other humans) or they would've had to find out from someone else who was there - i.e., someone from the senju clan. here's what the senju clan knows happened pre-ceasefire:

-lord tobirama wounds uchiha izuna -the uchiha retreat and several of them defect -uchiha madara shows up, briefly has a yell-off with lord hashirama (uchiha madara says uchiha izuna is dead but left him "power to protect the uchiha", lord hashirama mentions a peace agreement, uchiha madara says "fuck you fight me"), and then fights until he literally can't move anymore -lord tobirama attempts to kill uchiha madara, which would effectively end the war for good, and is stopped by lord hashirama pretty aggressively -lord hashirama tries to reason with uchiha madara again but gets told "if u want me to trust u kill urself" to which he says "ok bet", orders the clan not to continue fighting the uchiha after he's gone, and makes to stab himself in the stomach, which would effectively end the war for good in favor of the uchiha, who had basically already lost -uchiha madara stops him from killing himself and agrees to the truce, meaning the uchiha have in all but name lost and conceded the war to the senju

we don't know how much of the two clans are aware of hashirama and madara's childhood friendship, but it was probably impossible to hide that something had happened. hashirama is naturally charismatic, so he could probably win back his clan's trust pretty easily, but madara.... not so much.

so if your clan head with a history of not-so-reliable(-seeming) behavior abandoned the clan to go fight his ex-friend right after his brother and heir died, having taken his eyeballs, and then came back announcing a truce with your age-old enemy, and then you found out from the grapevine some version of "madara could have won the whole war if he'd just let hashirama harakiri himself but actively chose to stop him".... what would you think?

don't ask yourself "why would the uchiha think madara killed izuna and stole his eyes", ask yourself this instead: why wouldn't they think he did that?

[xbomboi]

i wonder if people actually realize that darling and dexter being twins was a retcon

if it were up to me, they’d have always been presented as twins from the start, because that’s just way better imo, but i’m not CEO of Mattel so it’s NOT up to me and we have this weird inconsistency.

i mean, first of all, the start of the tv series already includes that weird period of time where darling just straight up Does Not Exist because at the end of the day this is just an extended toy commercial and there wasn’t any toy to advertise yet.

when darling WAS, however, introduced into the show, she strangely interacts with DARING more than she ever does dexter, despite her closeness to the latter that’s established as early on as her doll’s diary. my personal guess as to why that is has to do from the show capitalizing heavily on darling’s princess charming gimmick of being a girl who’s a knight, and as a result, benefited from portraying the fact that she and daring are, in a way, foils to each other.

anyway, when darling’s doll released, her bio listed her birthday as November 16th. dexter’s birthday had already been established as the 11th of February, so at this time, darling was not intended to be his twin.

and we can see this further shown by the word choice in darling’s diary. she refers to daring as her “oldest brother” and then goes on to refer to dexter as her “older brother”. which, sure, a twin can be older than the other, but in her doll diary, she’s gonna call him her twin if they want us to know that they’re twins.

i’m not sure exactly when the earliest instance of any official media referring to darling and dexter as twins was, but if my memory serves me correctly, i believe it was a post from the official Facebook that had stated they were twins. again, don’t quote me on that.

this discrepancy is important to me as someone who has to constantly fact check lore and timeline of events, because it very much so impacted Ever After High media released prior to the twin retcon’s ability to hold up. as far as I can remember, a good amount of the books were written under the initial status of darling’s birthday falling on 11/16 rather than 2/11 with dexter, the Susanne Selfors books coming to mind in particular. but i could be wrong, because i’m not going to reread all of those books just for this post.

the updated birthday for darling ended up being the one they stuck with. a brief scroll on the official Ever After High Instagram page will show as much, with birthday posts for dexter & darling on the same day. there is the tidbit of information that dexter is still older by a few seconds (not sure if this was ever officially stated, i’m only going off of the wiki for this one detail), but i honestly think that’s only included as a way to try and rectify the past instances of darling or possibly anyone else referring to dexter as her older brother.

as of today, it seems like everyone understands darling and dexter to be twins, and if they are familiar with the past retcon, they prefer the twin change and are glad it was made. i’ve never witnessed anyone say anything like “ugh, i really wish they wouldn’t have made darling dexter’s twin and kept her younger!!”.

still, it’s interesting that it happened. i call it what it is: a retcon. and most people hear that term and associate it with negativity. which, to be fair, in terms of writing, it more often than not absolutely is. but in this isolated case, despite it making some of the supplementary pieces of media for the series confusing (though the show and books/diaries take place in a different continuity anyway), i see this as a good thing. right off the bat, it makes less sense to me that the Charmings would intentionally go on to have not just one but two other children individually after daring with him being the successful golden child they wanted. it makes more sense that they decided to have one other child just for the hell of it and happened to end up with two.

also, and i don’t have the source for this so i’m just going based off of memory, apparently the grade-level cut off isn’t in the fall in the Ever After High universe, because daring, dexter, and darling are all intended to be in the same grade according to what i believe was one of the writers or producers or something of the sort for the tv show. and i make that conclusion about the cutoff not being in the fall because daring’s birthday is April 2nd, and since he’s older than dexter & darling, they’d have been born in February of the following year, meaning in order for them to be in the same grade together, the grade level cut off couldn’t fall anywhere within the roughly nine months gap between April to the next February. which, if you’ve done the math, you’ll have realized must mean that either the cut off for the next grade either falls sometime late February anywhere after the 11th, is on the 1st of April, or is any day in the month of March.

darling being in the same grade as daring and not a grade (or two) below also makes daring and rosabella work considering that, being her roommate, rosabella would be in whatever grade darling is in, and were she to be anymore than a grade below daring, there’d be a questionable age gap. not to mention with darling herself and apple. jesus. so it’s definitely a positive that’s not the case. and to anyone who may have been confused before, this is also why dexter can room with a character like hunter, because he too is in the same grade.

or maybe this is a show for babies and nothing matters.

[the-fab-fox]

Just some stuff I'm dealing with that might put my aggressive-ish post about the hypocrisy/sexism (which I still maintain my stance, I just could have gone about it better maybe) into perspective.

Below the cut

My current living situation is hell. I moved in about a year ago this month (idr what day). Week 2 I called it. I was like I think both Clinton and Duffy (Michael) are transphobes. @sunshineandteddybears kept maintaining that I was perhaps making harsh claims. So I tried to give the benefit of the doubt.

Well in that time, there are points of contention followed by times of calm when another drama with escalate.

First three times was me and my trauma responses causing issues. I needed to work on myself and not put my past trauma on others.

Except then this last time. All Clinton (in truth it's Clinton every fucking time. Y'all don't even know. I can't put it into words due to my belief and the fact we reap 3 times what we put out so. All I'll say is if he died in any way shape or form starting now onward, I highly doubt the world would miss him. I sure as fuck wouldn't care. Good riddance.

Anywhen. So apparently he's got beef with me. But I don't know it. He never came to me to tell me this beef he's had for awhile. So when Duffy tells me I'm shocked. He also tells me that I need to be understanding because Clinton (a cis gay man just like Duffy and the other roomie Rich, who is the only good one here—note: in case I didn't make it clear I'm a trans man) has gone through trauma in regards to being gay and has dealt with people deciving him and his gay journey was so hard and so he sees me

A trans guy. And he is like that's a liar. That person is sneaky and sketch because they are transitioning to something else and not being who they were born and so that makes them unauthentic.

Hey trans people. Did you realize we're all apparently being unauthentic in our journey to authenticity. Now how the fuck does that one work.

So right. This point nailed the coffin shut on the transphobic question. Anyway. For more than 30 minutes (the shortest thus far) I had to sit there and take this transphobic rhetoric as well as stay complacent and calm as he shat on me and told me I was the problem and I needed to be a mind reader and all that. And give Clinton leeway and grace because of the trauma. EXCEPT wait

*scrolls up* okay good I remember correctly. When I had the trauma responses I was the problem and I needed to take ownership of my trauma and work through it and not put it on others. (Which is correct but I also wasn't really doing all that and he was purposely perpetuating the trauma while saying all this.

There was a night ( @sunshineandteddybears can attest) that Duffy had managed to almost convince me that I was the horrible person he painted me out to be. She had to talk me off the ledge figuratively.

And this last one was a doozy. And Imma share it with y'all.

So there it is. You can decide for yourself if I'm correct or not.

I'm my mind. All of this equates to mental/psychological and emotional abuse. (Many still don't see these as that bad but let me tell you. Sometimes this stuff is much worse than the physical. You get to a point where you second guess everything and everyone. It's hell.)

On top of that, dealing with no funds to pay for car note or rent. And fuck I hate to high heavens that I have to pay that fucking garbage rat another fucking cent.

Good news! (Trying not to worry about it not happening due to my past.) I'm gonna be moving with an actual person I know well. Just antsy because I need to get out of this environment.

I was on medical leave but only get 20 ish percent of my income. It ended on the 6th and suddenly my job after I sent my doc note in was like we need you to go this huge list of very long classes.

Had to do fingerprint and a renewed bg check. All these are things that take forever to get through. They could have fucking give it to me to do during my fucking leave. Though if I remember correctly they have to pay me for the stuff so I'm gonna press them on that if I don't see it on a paycheck.

So then I call and am like I have given all the stuff only to get vm from my old manager (I guess she stepped down) and she's like we need your doc note.

Yes readers. The very same doc note I sent before I got all the other requirements.

So I resent it and the flu doctor note I got since I got the flu right at the end of my leave Because ofc. (Thanks roomies. That was all you.)

Ugh okay so. One good thing and I'm super hopeful for so if y'all will pray or talk to your gods or the universe or whoever. Please put out a good word for me to them for this job and wish me luck?

The good thing since I forgot: there is an office administrator position I super want with an organization I love the sound of.

I'm sure there's more I'm forgetting but ye

AHA FORGOT THE OTHER BIGGEST ONE. I'M QUITTING VAPING. AND LAST TWO DAYS HAVE BEEN WITHOUT THE NICOTINE PATCH AT ALL!! (I'M VERY PROUD)

[yolowritter]

About your future Lilanette AU and the thing about Lila learning to be human... Does it have anything to do with sociopathy being determined both by genes and by external stymuli and Tikki trying to get Lila closer to Marinette to prevent the sociopathy to manifest as she grows up?

It's actually a no-Miraculous Au, but you're spot-on otherwise!

Tw for blood, bullying and murder for anyone who needs it.

So, it's mostly like you guessed. The Au takes place during everyone's first year of university, and they're on the same campus for reasons. Alya is studying journaling, Nino is going for musical production, Marinette is studying fashion, Adrien also fashion (cuz Gabriel), Luka is studying the history of music, Nathaniel is there for drawing, etc. Lila is attendig for the new hunting ground.

Regarding her sociopathy, I've made it more of an external stimuli thing, since I don't particularly like to get too much into genetics for character backstory. Just a personal preferrence on focusing on emotions instead. Also, I always get rid of her other identities unless I'm writing canon, so Cerise has been alt+f4'ed out of existence. The thing is...this whole Au has a twist. Lila remembers going through this before. I don't plan on explaining this definatively (maybe it's Tikki pulling strings from the Great Beyond or something), but yes, Lila's immediate impulse is to be near Marinette.

To better explain, the first time around, Lila started doing a little bit of stabbing, poisoning, defenestrating, etc. Roger and the other police were completely useless in finding her, and the (oc) headmaster of the university is more concerned with donors than he is murders. Hence, Alya decides to investigate on her own. Marinette drags herself into it since Alya will get herself killed if she does this alone. A year of investigating later, they've had several close calls with Lila, both in catching her and getting a knife to the neck. However...the murders stop at the end of the year. Because Loop #1 Lila has a new obsession. Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

I need to get into why Lila kills before we tackle the yuri, though. The first time around, she's mostly just bored of life. We have the usual backstory of "Lila lies for attention" but that severely escalated in this au because she had absolutely nothing to entertain her (no Marinette). This is the first time they meet each other btw, Lila was in Italy up until now. With everything being so easy and nobody ever getting her attention, Lila was left even more isolated. A workaholic mom and nonexistent father didn't help matters either. He was never in her life, and while Lila did find him eventually...the talk was a little bit one-sided. Fun fact, he actually gets no dialogue in this au!

Her first kill had been mostly an accident. Some girl she'd been bullying at her high school, Lila wanted to see how far she could take it...and that girl isn't around anymore. Ever since then, she just found it amusing to see what she can get away with. Like a puzzle game, in her eyes. She also burned that school down on her way out to cover her tracks.

Anyway, back to Marinette. The first time around, Lila slowly became obsessed with her. Think the yuri version of Light and L, because Marinette was the only one who could ever follow Lila's train of thought, even correctly deduce her motives and solve some of the murders by back-tracking through them like puzzles. Lila actually befriended Alya to keep tabs on them, but the murder mystery ended in a draw. She initially made excuses to get closer to Marinette because she was fascinated by the possibility of an equal...and then they ended up dating for half a year, during which Lila pulled out the big guns to make absolutely sure Marinette wasn't ever going to leave her. Welcome back abandonment issues, nobody missed you.

Alya, Nino, Tom and Sabine all fell victims to accident after accident, until Marinette had only Lila left. She and Adrien never really connected in the first iteration, so he's out of the picture. Unfortunately, fake it till you make it is a valid strategy, and Lila had been pretending to be both a normal person and very much in love. Eventually she genuinely feels the need to be honest with Marinette, and reveals herself. Lila gets shanked by her girlfriend that same night.

And wakes up in her college dorm, Year 1, on the first day of classes. With all of her trophies missing, and all evidence pointing to her going back somehow. Lila has her theories, but decides to treat this as reality for now, and immediately bulldozes her way to Marinette. Because they mutually murdered each other while in bed, and Lila has no idea if her girlfriend also remembers!

Since this Au is mostly Lila Pov, we follow her as she plays detective this time, with the roles reversed. Lila still does do murder, but the poor girl honestly needs a good puzzle to take the stress off. However, there's one key change. Lila gets to meet everyone else relatively early. Meaning that despite not intending to, she very slowly starts to form more genuine friendships.

With Alya for example, Lila still gets close to her to keep tabs on the investigation into her kills, but Alya's lack of self-preservation is kind of endearing to her. Nino just has damn good music taste and Lila regrets not befriending him last time. She and Adrien bond over shitty/absent parental figures. She accidentally flirts with him to distract him from talking to Marinette one time and they form a running gag of Lila being obsessed with his wallet. She forms actual humam connections, believe it or not.

As for the murders, Lila restricts herself a little this time, since a lot of them were just for the thrill, which she doesn't depend on as much this time around. She stills kills a lot of people, including several bullies, stuck up brats (not Chloe she may not even be here), and generally shitty folks, because she thinks nobody is going to miss them. The only time Lila gets caught with blood on her hands is the one stabbing she didn't actually do! (Nathaniel, he's fine afterwards)

Eventually, Lila finds out if Marinette knows or not. She's tried to be her friend so far, but that's basically her ex (even if their time together was slashed short with a kitchen knife), and she no idea how to avoid being gay about it. Alya ships them so hard she makes a Lilanette t-shirt. Also Lila's weird friendhship with Adrien somehow led to him also shipping it. Marinette is losing her mind because pretty girl is a walking mass of red flags and flirting with her constantly!

Also that serial killer on campus is ridiculously smart and has shoved her into a wall multiple times, without cutting her neck open. What the hell. Generally, this Au is one huge mess of a sociopathic young adult figuring out how being human works, and also playing an extremely elaborate game of yuri cat and mouse with the girl who may or may not remember their past together. And yes, I am obsessed.

Thanks for the ask, I've been dying to talk about this and have so many Lila thoughts it's not even funny. If you wanna know more, I could be convinced (read: forced by the voices in my head) to write a snippet if my current inspiration survives for a few more hours. Let's hope so, because I am feeling rather Lilanette today...