#online trauma

[mynnthia]

was talking with a friend about how some of dunmeshi fаndom misunderstands kabru's initial feelings towards laios.

to sum up kabru's situation via a self-contained modernized metaphor:

kabru is like a guy who lost his entire family in a highly traumatic car accident. years later he joins a discord server and takes note of laios, another server member who seems interesting, so they start chatting. then laios reveals his special interest and favorite movie of all time is David Cronenberg's Crash (1996), and invites kabru to go watch a demolition derby with him

[dclovesdanny]

Idiots in love x Cosmic Love

Danny has had a crush on his online friends for years. His first online friend, SuperManSuperFan, had originally become his friend when they played Doomed together online a few years ago. SuperManSuperFan, or Super, as Danny called him, was funny and nice. Super was his main escape from the trauma at home, and soon became his escape from the expectations and the ghosts and the shooting and the fear.

Danny didn’t know when talking to Super became safe. He didn’t know when it became easier to do things when he imagined Super’s commentary in his head. He didn’t know when hearing Super’s voice caused his body to relax, and his mind to clear. He didn’t know, but it was already too late by the time he realized it.

Danny’s crush on his other online friend, BloodoftheBat, was different. They met on Tumblr, both posting art. Danny was learning to draw, since the accident caused mobility problems in his hands, and Jazz recommended it as a way to both process his trauma and trying to keep mobility intact in his hands.

BloodoftheBat was different than Super. Blood was blunt and open, but didn’t lie. Blood quipped back but understood when things weren’t to be written. Blood and Danny traded art prompts and pieces when sleep was too hard and the dark memories were too strong.

Danny had mentioned them to each other, but neither one really seemed to like it. Super always redirected the conversation to something else, and Blood would get snippy. He didn’t understand, but he didn’t mind.

(It wasn’t like he didn’t feel the same when Blood mentioned his friend who inspired his art pieces, or when Super mentioned his best friend Damian. It wasn’t like he didn’t know that cold rush up his spine and the lump in his throat.)

(Danny didn’t want to examine why he felt like this. He knew Jazz would say something about anxious attachment or codependency, and Danny didn’t want to hear it.)

He just hopes he can still talk to them while his parents took him with them to go to Lex Luther’s gala, who apparently was a distant relative of Vlad.

(Danny just hoped this billionaire was less gross.)

(Damian hated going to galas. He would much rather be spending time with his pets, on patrol, or messaging online with his friend BeyondtheStars. At least this time Jon would be able to sit with him as they avoided the idiots and social climbers, even if he couldn’t stop talking about his online friend.)

[wildfeather5002]

I hate it when xtians reduce my religious trauma to "a religious person said something mean to you once so now you're mad at religion".

Like, shut the fuck up. My trauma isn't just someone being a little rude to me once, it was systematic, deliberate manipulation with the threat of possible eternity of suffering in Hell if I didn't obey religious rules and "keep Christ in my heart". It was "Nonbelievers burn in a lake of eternal fire. Tell your friends to convert to our faith or they'll be damned for eternity".

I have suffered from anxiety, ocd and other mental health issues for several fucking years because of this shit. I've suppressed my sexuality and felt terrible guilt just for the 'sin' of having sexual thoughts. I've feared for my loved one's souls, genuinely believing they would go to Hell for simply not being xtians and that I'd never see them again in the afterlife.

These beliefs are sick and twisted. What I went through was sick and twisted.

I seriously don't know what to say to you if you still think telling anyone, let alone a child, that they're going to be damned for eternity if they disobey 'God's word' is totally fine and not abusive.

Know your fucking place and stop speaking over trauma survivors who have been hurt by your shitty religion.

[direquail]

One of the many things I find funny and irritating is the slant of a lot of interpretations of Alecto's name (that it's about feminine rage)--on this here wlw internet in the year of our lord 2024, it's easily made to figure as rage against God, or rage against patriarchy, or religious oppression, and therefore an allusion to the idea that she's going to get her vengeance on John for betraying and oppressing her somehow, but like

John is the one who named her Alecto. He's the one who named her that. So, naming her "Alecto" is alluding to the embodiment of John's rage--their rage, since they are joined inseparably (John even explicitly says that when he first perceives her: "You wouldn't stop screaming. You were so scared. You were so goddamn mad").

He says of Alecto to Harrow, "In a very real way, you are [Alecto's] children". At a very surface level, Alecto is (depending on the text or tradition), one of the Furies--famously, in several surviving Greek tragedies, who punish Orestes for the crime of killing his mother. In fact, in Aeschylus' Oresteia, they declare that they are specifically bound to avenge matricide.

So the name "Alecto" alludes to the nature of John's mission and how he sees it.

It also implies that his divine rage, the rage that gives him power, the power that makes him divine, that he either represents or wants to represent, is feminine rage. He was chosen by Earth (which, Furies are sometimes the daughters of Gaia); he is her champion, however he's managed to fuck that up. Once the truth of that comes out, it becomes clear that all of his power comes from her.

And that's why you get statements from Tamsyn Muir like:

“[T]he God of the Locked Tomb IS a man; he IS the Father and the Teacher; it’s an inherently masc role played by someone who has an uneasy relationship himself to playing a Biblical patriarch. John falls back on hierarchies and roles because they’re familiar even when he’s struggling not to. Even he identifies himself as the God who became man and the man who became God. But the divine in the Locked Tomb is essentially feminine on multiple axes – I think Nona will illuminate that a little bit more."

So yes, he plays the role of Emperor and God and Teacher, with all of the things that implies. And I don't think it should be discounted. But he also is (and partly sees himself as) the chosen champion of a goddess, or what is for all intents & purposes for a human like him a goddess. He is her avenger, and while she sleeps, her avatar.

And I don't think we're meant to read him purely as a parasite who's taking advantage of her to gain power for himself, either. Or an oppressive, Kronos-like figure. Especially if you consider Palamedes' theory of the Grand Lysis, even if he was purely motivated by desire for power before (which I really doubt), there are parts of each in the other, now. What was clear and separate before is uncertain and interpenetrated. Is his rage his own, or hers? Is his mission of revenge his, or hers? If he wants power, is that his own selfishness, or her desire to survive?

And does it matter?

[uncanny-tranny]

Going to be really honest, if you're disabled, you truly don't owe people - or the world - access to your diagnoses, symptoms, accessibility needs (and why you need them), mental health history, trauma, or anything like that.

The urge to force people to lay themselves out so they can be picked apart, consumed, and feasted upon by people who demand that their comfort outweigh that of a disabled person's is an ableist pipe dream. It is the urge to control that which you feel you have no control over, and it's your right to refuse to play that game, that role.

[traumasurvivors]

If your abuse or trauma took place online, it is still valid. You are still allowed to struggle and have feelings about it.

[chanelle-lize]

I used to have a really hard time bringing up the fact that I graduated from high school a year late without feeling the need to explain why and insisting that it wasn't my fault while simultaneously kicking myself for how much I sounded like I was just making excuses for something I should take responsibility for.

Then I watched Dimension 20's "The Seven" and suddenly I could simply say that I was a super senior.

The first time I heard the phrase "super senior" was in reference to Antiope Jones, a Black girl who had been held back a year after getting kidnapped and imprisoned by members of a fundamentalist cult, and like, girl, same.

So, since then, instead of anxiously spinning out any time I tried to tell a personal high school anecdote, I could just say I was a super senior, and then my brain would auto complete that statement with "like Antiope Jones" and I'd feel good about myself because Antiope Jones Is That Bitch.

That's what the problem had been the whole time. I wasn't worried about how other people would perceive me; I had been struggling with how I perceived myself.

Thanks, Aabria.

[loosethreadsofyoursoul]

ok this is a controversial opinion but like….. to me, henry spencer was actually not a shit father….. hear me out.

i understand that there’s a lot of subtleties that go into emotionally abusive parents, and i’m not trying to dismiss that, but honestly i just don’t see all the negativity that gets associated with him so often. also, between henry and madeleine, one parent actually seemed to be there when shawn was growing up, and it wasn’t his mother.

let’s look at shawn’s childhood. in all the flashbacks, henry was the one who volunteered at shawn’s school, who took him to movies and was around for all of his new hobbies and interests. he was the one making sure shawn did his homework and hung out with his friends and learned life lessons. granted, some of his teaching methods were not appropriate for a kid shawn’s age, so yes i can see where the criticisms come in and i agree with them. but he was so much more than his mistakes, he was the parent who cared.

when shawn grows up, yes there’s animosity between him and his father but to be quite honest, i’ve never met one person who doesn’t have unresolved daddy issues so that in itself doesn’t condemn henry in my mind. we see how much henry saved from shawn’s childhood and how much he remembers, and to me he actually does quite a bit to help shawn when he needs it. this is particularly telling in comparison to madeleine, who isn’t there to begin with and eventually we find out she really did leave her kid behind, and to me that does a lot more damage than any one thing henry did.

shawn and henry have issues, i won’t argue with that. but i really don’t think henry gets enough credit for the good he did and the way he tried when shawn got older. above all else, he was there and he was there for shawn, and that’s important. god knows it’s not everything, but it’s something.

[j0them0971]

Ya know...

I'm kinda mad at SSO for redoing the whole introduction to Jorvik thing. First they have all the Soul Riders, so total spoilers there, and then they train wreck your character into the whole keepers of aideen bullshit. THEN. They have that fucking dream sequence where you kinda go into pandoria but also kinda not and it's scary and traumatic? Like little kids would freak out over this??? Wtf SSE what the actual fuck

Ok I'm done now I'm just mad >:[

[dragonpyre]

Finding out Pandaredd is apparently your college friend was a fucking jump scare Jesus

-☘️

Dude, finding out he was famous on tiktok was a jump scare!

[ruminate88]

You’re not always as special to some people as they were to you. It’s just how it is.

[yinyuedijun]

I used to be kinda embarrassed about the fact that I kinda write the same themes over and over in my fics and it's probably extremely evident as to why I do (like crystal clear from the writing alone) LMFAODLSJAK. I like to think that my writing is interesting despite it though and that it doesn't really alienate people. yes the type of dark content I write is absurdly personal but I always aim to write it in a way that universalizes the highly personal feelings. so the audience can experience the way a certain type of trauma can make a person feel and also experience the type of love someone can have despite it (for better or worse). also so everyone can experience insanely horny romantic lust over a 2d man in the process

[butterfly-headquarters]

i might have accidentally pulled an all-nighter but I finished this from start to finish ehe

aideen montana or something along those lines ref link

[bolszaja-miedwedica]

just saw a cute post about Lucifer comforting his devotee and it reminded me of when i had a snappy argument with my husband yesterday and Dionysus told me to go on the balcony to think about my behavior and to only come back when i apologize and understand what i did wrong i literally got sent to time out for a tantrum

[evilmedian]

if some of you would actually take the time to read the scientific literature you claim to adhere to, you might realize that a core feature of complex dissociation is denying, minimizing and straight-up forgetting trauma. and if you think with your brain for five seconds, it may also occur to you that if you have complex dissociation, it means your experiences were "enough" to cause complex dissociation!

if you put these two ideas together you might even come to the logical conclusion that it's fucking useless at best to argue about what's "severe enough to cause a system" and what isn't!

[tanema123]

Hope you had a good day peeps. :)

Why don't overlords ever have an online meeting?