#omfg thats me !

[wienners]

"dude its not that embarassing to rewatch some creepypasta stuff you liked as a teenager" the character i imprinted on like a baby duck at 16 was a demon from new jersey that acts like the humanization of every offspring song and canonically listens to scissor sisters. His favorite color is purple and his favorite pokemon is gengar. He leaves people notes with emojis on them. He acts like a beetlejuice scare actor at halloween horror nights. His catchphrase is "feeling sassy?" Hes (allegedly) worked with every war criminal throughout history and been every serial killer. even the gay ones. he ate a baby. his animal motif is a rabbit. hes kind of based off donnie darko. he almost exclusively wears merchandise of the Quentin Tarantino movie Death Proof. he talks to his cats in a baby voice. he wears a white fedora that makes every video he wears it in feel dated by like 7 years. hes 5'3. he hacked a girls tumblr blog. he added a laugh track over a video of him killing people. he named a chainsaw rex. he torments people by playing frank sinatra at them. his name comes from an animal collective song. theres a canon blog entry where he makes the speakers blare rob zombie before he enters a room, then holds a guy at gunpoint to describe what he did to to him while "making sure to leave in all the cool parts". Hes like ten tumblr sexymen traits rolled into one. His actor has gone on record saying heath ledgers joker inspired his acting choices. Sometimes his voice gets distorted and it makes him sound like bill ciphers first year on HRT. Hes basically like my artistic muse. For some fucking reason i associate the song cake by the ocean with him. I firmly believe that if everymanhybrid didn't require a masters degree in creepypasta autism to comprehend, he would've caused more teenage stabbings than the slenderman incident and more kin war tumblr scenarios than nagito komaeda.

[taikk0]

the unspoken broflovski family curse

[dizzybizz]

"looks like i win! take that!"

[anonymouscheeses]

I'm gonna be shitting and screaming and starting fights if Sera becomes a villain. I can't take sibling angst, Sera loves Emily I swear guys believe meeee.

[miasmaghoul]

whos the best ghoul cook? do you think they have any weird eating quirks (like water ghouls eating raw fish, mountain chewin on his terra cotta plant pots, fire ghouls needing to eat more bc of higher body temp, anything like that)?

Did I ever tell you guys that I earned a scholarship to culinary school? I couldn't go, but cooking and baking remain passions of mine that I do NOT get to talk about enough.

But now you've given me an excuse >:)

So here, a BUNCH of my cooking (and favorite food) headcanons for the ghouls and Papas alike!

(There's some murder ghoul content here, mostly in Alpha's section - couldn't help myself 😌)

Aeon isn't one for cooking. Loves eating food, certainly, but not making it. He's more of a snacker, partly because it's more convenient but mostly because he doesn't have the attention span to do much more than microwave instant noodles. He's not picky though, will eat whatever is put in front of him as long as someone else has prepared it. Also doesn't have much of a sweet tooth, more of a salty/savory guy. Favorite foods include hot cheetos, thick cut beef jerky (good to gnaw), and whatever appears on his plate at meal times.

Aether is a ghoul of simple tastes. He'll cook when he has the time, but it's going to be one of his four go-to recipes every time. Always some format of protein + starch + veg, with a complementary sauce. He meal preps every weekend after his retirement so he can have easy meals to microwave and eat in the infirmary. Isn't the biggest fan of cooking with company, unless they're willing to stay out of the kitchen and not interrupt his routine. Has a weak spot for bananas. Favorite meal is one-pan roasted chicken, potatoes and asparagus with rosemary and garlic from Mountain’s garden.

Alpha does not cook, wouldn't dream of it. He doesn't even deign to eat human food most of the time, turns his nose up at it when offered. He likes his meat raw, and wants to hunt it himself so he can feel the blood run down his chin. Any prey is fair game - if he finds you in the woods, you'd better hope you can outrun him. (You cannot.) Favorite foods include the flesh and organs of anything with a pulse.

Aurora likes the idea of cooking, but in practice...well, she tries. She's impatient, is the problem - what do you mean simmer for 20 minutes? She's hungry now! She inevitably rushes everything she makes, no matter how much input she gets from the others, and has yet to learn her lesson. She also has a MASSIVE sweet tooth, they can't keep enough sugary snacks in the pantry as far as she's concerned. Favorite foods include spaghetti with butter and cheese (one of the only things she can always get right), boxed brownies and any kind of fruity candy she can get her paws on.

Cirrus can cook pretty well, if she says so herself, but it's rare that she does it for anyone but herself. She has very particular tastes, and doesn't want to have to adapt them for others. She loves organ meat and bitter vegetables, enjoys the intensity of those flavors while the smell alone keeps most of the others away. Oh well, more for her! She'll eat anything thats made for her though, especially if its served on a silver platter by someone on their knees. Favorite foods (aside from the aforementioned organs) mostly include healthy things like fresh fruit and veggies, steamed shellfish and lean meat.

Cumulus is more of a baker than a cook, but enjoys any time spent in the kitchen either way. She's the type to make a day of it, in her comfiest clothes with music playing while she dances in front of the stove. Her food is never the prettiest, but it's made with love and tastes so much better for it. Her favorite things to bake are cookies and pies, but she doesn't eat many sweets herself. Prefers seeing the others enjoy them. Favorite foods include homemade bread (she has a sourdough starter named Breadly) with lots of butter and flaky salt, anything citrus-forward and wants her proteins heavily spiced (not spicy, she has a low tolerance, but loves the fragrant flavors of herbs and spices).

Dewdrop doesn't advertise it, but he's one of the best ghouls to have in the kitchen. His precision and attention to detail are second to none, and while it doesn't make him particularly fun to share a kitchen with it does make him an outstanding cook. He likes very intricate, involved recipes because he can use them to showcase his skills (and earn a whole bunch of praise at the dining table as a bonus). Loves spicy food, which everyone assumes is due to him now being a fire ghoul, but he's actually always enjoyed a good burn. Favorite foods include any meat served on the bone, fermented foods (kimchi and sour pickles especially) and anything smoked.

Ifrit does not know how the stove works. He survives on protein bars and any leftovers he can pilfer from the abbey kitchens. Food is not a thing he's super interested in, just takes what he needs to fuel himself, and would rather follow in Alpha's footsteps anyway. He likes to hang out at the lake every now and then with Mist, though - she'll pop up from the water every now and then with a nice plump trout to toss his way, which he will roast with his bare hands. Doesn't really have a favorite food, but does like crunchy things.

Mist, if she isn't sharing her spoils with Ifrit, will keep her catch for herself. She's small enough that one good-sized lake fish will tide her over for the day. She does prefer them raw and whole, always a bit on the feral side, but she can be convinced to join the others for sushi if the offer arises. Favorite foods include anything alive and not poisonous in the lake, and cookie dough ice cream (don't tell anyone).

Mountain is overall considered to be the best cook amongst the ghouls, and definitely has the goofy apron to prove it. Naturally skilled and adaptable, he enjoys preparing meals for his pack and will do so with anyone that wishes to lend a hand. Usually it's Cumulus or Sunshine, but they all keep him company at one point or another. He grows much of the produce used in their kitchen himself, all of it fresh and delicious, but Mountain does not eat a bite of it. He's a total carnivore - the closest he gets to eating his homegrown goodies is including them in a stew but avoiding them in his own bowl. Favorite foods include rabbit, venison and this one Vietnamese style grilled beef and rice noodle dish that Dew makes.

Omega learned to cook by osmosis, if you ask him. Time spent under three Papas will do thay to a ghoul. He doesn't cook much, but he's excellent at crafting simple, filling pasta dishes that are good for the soul (so to speak). Also treats it as an excuse to drink plenty of the good wine stashed away in the abbey's cellars - blame Terzo for that habit. Favorite meal is fresh pappardelle served with roasted tomatoes, basil and spicy sausage.

Rain doesn't cook if it involves more than the microwave, not because he can't but because he prefers to be waited on. Breakfast in bed, charcuterie plates in the afternoon, specially prepared dinners to make sure he's kept happy - none of it is necessary, but Rain can't help how much he loves being served. Good thing no one minds giving him the royal treatment. He will also indulge in the odd raw fish during a swim, but only does it beneath the surface, away from prying eyes. Favorite good is soup, any kind, but he prefers brothy ones over thick or creamy styles. If he had to pick a single favorite varitey, it would be miso.

Swiss is only allowed in the kitchen because he's good with a knife. He can burn through prep work like nobody's business, but that's where his skill set ends. He's caused one too many greasefires to he trusted at the stove, and every time he's put something in the oven he's forgotten about it until smoke filled the room and the ghoulettes had to magickally air it out. But he can chop like a food processor, so he gets the knife pass. He's another one that'll eat anything put in front of him, with one exception: eggs. Can't stand them. Favorite foods include red meat served rare, really dark, bitter chocolate and anything with hideous amounts of garlic.

Sunshine is chaos personified in the kitchen. She loves to experiment with flavors and techniques, but has yet to have anything close to a success. Pasta with pesto and pineapple (alliteration is fun), chocolate covered avocado balls (with bacon, because why not), a tuna sandwich made with coconut yogurt instead of mayo (it's healthy!) - these are but a few of the food crimes that have lost her solo access to the kitchens. This girl could burn cereal, and no one wants to see that. She does love to eat though, and will frequently hang out when someone else is cooking so she can sneak bites whatever they're making. Favorite foods include cheese (all kinds), sour candy and all the orchard fresh peaches she can get her hands on.

And for the Papas:

Primo had to learn his way around the kitchen from an early age, thanks to the responsibility of raising his younger brothers falling onto his shoulders. He learned by watching the kitchen staff - a pair of elderly Sisters with so much skill in their gnarled hands that Primo couldn't look away. He never got very good at it, mostly sticking to a handful of reliable dishes that could be made cheap and easily for the three of them. His favorite of the bunch was also the one thing he was best at making - a simple mushroom risotto.

Secondo took to the kitchen like it was second nature, once Primo could trust him to not chop a finger off. Would spend hours poring over cookbooks and learning by doing, eating his own failures so his brothers wouldn't have to. He really enjoyed making simple but hearty comfort foods, lots of rib-sticking braises and stews filled with herbs and veggies from Primo's modest garden. He even cooked the last meal they ever shared together, on that fateful Uno night. It was his favorite, a lasagna constructed from fresh sheets of pasta, homemade ricotta, spinach and a simple tomato sauce, served with roasted garlic focaccia.

Terzo did not get the cooking gene, aside from being able to boil water for his tea. It wasn't a big deal since his brothers picked up the slack, and he decided there were other things that took priority - like music, history and how to retain a full head of hair after age 30. He preferred drinking over eating anyway, mostly saw food as something to put in his stomach to cushion the wine. He was a man of simple tastes, and his favorite thing was a humble sandwich of mortadella, provolone and spicy pickled peppers.

Copia never had to learn to cook, raised by the Clergy and doted on thanks to a not-so-subtle suggestion from Sister Imperator. More than a little spoiled in that sense, he would also go on to be the most worldly Papa in terms of his tastes. So much time spent traveling the world helped to expand his palate, and he got into the habit of sending pictures and descriptions of his favorites back to the abbey so the kitchen staff could figure out how to replicate them. It's impossible for him to pick a favorite, but thanks to so much time spent in LA he does have a real soft spot for Mexican food. Tacos al pastor in particular, but without the cilantro (he has the soap gene).

[foolsocracy]

Now having watched Frankenstein (1931) I find this really interesting. I didn't really expect the writers themselves to have watched the film; I assumed they saw it was a horror film released in Pete's time and included it with the bonus that the audience would know the story because its Frankenstein. It really aligns with the themes of spider noir though, so I'm second guessing myself.

I read Frankenstein a while back so I'm not as familiar with it as I once was, but I'd say its generous to say the movie is based off of the original novel. It hits some of the points but it really is different. I mean, in the film its Henry Frankenstein, not even Victor.

In the film, the monster is played almost-infantile. He reaches out towards light as if he could grab it. He plays with a little girl by a lake, throwing in flowers to watch them float like boats. When he kills her, it's an accident. How could he have known that she wouldn't float along with the flowers? Its Frankenstein and his assistant who are portrayed as monstrous. They lock him in the dark for three days. The intimidate him with fire and whips and fists.

Despite this, its Frankenstein who gets the 'good end,' while the monster is left to burn alive, pinned inside a wooden mill set alight by the townspeople.

Pete could have gotten nightmares from a number of scenes. Although I wouldn't personally say this is a scary film, there are definitely unnerving parts. There was also a different standard in 1931 for what was scary in film, plus Pete was already living a hard life at such a young age when he saw it.

Based on the panels themselves it is clear that Pete was scared of the monster itself (which is fair, the make up and costuming wanted him to be frightening). "I expected him to tell me there's no such thing as monsters," because no one in real life is a resurrected, looming... once-man-now-creature. (Just you wait, Peter). It's a more juvenile read of the film but Pete is a kid. Ben though, is a veteran, a socialist, has been around the block. He has the sense to analyze the film and interpret it differently. It is the men who find themselves with a capacity for senseless cruelty that are the monsters. That is exactly what the noir comics are about.

I really like that it's clear that Uncle Ben knows what Peter is about to learn. It also shows how much Pete has changed, just within the 1-2 years since he'd seen Frankenstein.

[ye-olde-tardis]

You're telling me. You're telling me. That David Lister. DAVE LISTER. stopped Rimmer from committing suicide. (Because that's LITERALLY WHAT THAT WAS. HE WAS GONNA UNPLUG HIMSELF and DIE.) he stopped him from committing suicide by. Comparing him to moonlight. Fucking MOONLIGHT. what the fuck what the fuck‽‽‽‽‽‽ AND IT WORKED‽‽‽‽‽

[sukunasweetheart]

Mfs claim sukuna is "ugly" and then direct you to maybe 5 panels out of however many panels he now has in total... why are you ignoring the rest of the 99% where he looks fucking GODLY

[aphroditesswan]

Hellooooo ♡

New request like always 😋☝️

This time a s/o who's scared of roaches (I am scared of em) like they hate roaches with pure passion. And imagine s/o screaming cause a roach crawled on them (I cried when it happend to me)

Fandom: obey me!

(Idk if u can tell but I'm asking for evey Fandom u write for, so each Fandom can have there own lobe ♡)

Anyways see u in the next request ♡♡♡

ick - lay bankz

obey me brother x mc

summary: you find some terrifying demon lookin ahh bug while with the brothers

warnings: bugs, some brothers being coños, cursing, intentional lowercase (this annoys some people for some odd reason??) ooc probably

genre: crack fluff ish i think

notes: RAW ASS BITCH HE MIGHT GET SALMONELLA RED BOTTOMS DONT FIT IM A HOOD CINDERELLA 🔥🔥🔥 also im sorry this took a solid 9 months chat but i’m back on that grind 🫡🫡 this was hard for me to write i haven’t played the game in a year and a half or something

Lucifer

out of instinct, you yell for him. by now he has a headache, having to deal with his brothers yelling for him (or at him) all day and now you? he could care less but alas, he is your lover, he is obligated to attend to your needs. he opens the door to your room, not even able to speak before a pillow is thrown at his legs.

“sorry! but look downn,” you whisper, like the insect could hear you. however, he does as you say and looks down and out of the corner of his eye, sees exactly whats making you flip out. he sighes, walking softly to the bug, calmly squashing it under his foot and rubbing it into the wood floor, almost as if to make a point.

he sighs again, “is that all, my dear?” and you nod your head, thanking him and sighing of relief once he leaves to go back to his work.

Mammon

he knocked on your door, waiting patiently for you to open it. when all he was met with was a slight rustling from inside the room, he rolled his eyes and barged in.

“what are you- OH MY GOD A BUG” he stepped back as soon as he stepped inside, holding onto his chest like a middle aged white woman finding out her son smokes weed when he’s out for 6 hours after school instead of studying.

“RIGHT??? HELP ME” you motioned to yourself, then to the floor, then finally to your position perched on the desk.

“HOW?”

“GO GET LUCIFER OR SOMETHING I DONT KNOW.”

“absolutely not. you’re on your own.”

he walked out the door, backwards as to not lose sight of the ugly creature, then shut the door. as soon as you figured out a way to kill this bug, he was next.

Leviathan

you were perched up on your dresser, already restoring to throwing things at the poor bug who made its way into your room. leviathan walked in upon hearing the continuous loud thuds from your room.

“what the hell are you doing?” he mumbled, but it was still audible.

“levi! get it out, please!” he sighed, grabbing a tissue from your tissue box on your nightstand and gently picking up the tiny bug and throwing it out the window.

“happy, weirdo?” he asked as he helped you down from the dresser as you thanked him.

“you so owe me for this.” which means you’re buying him something stupid and unnecessarily expensive.

Asmodeus

you were sitting at you and your boyfriends shared vanity as he was just getting out of the shower, ever so slightly glancing to the left at the wall when you saw the most ginormous, disgusting thing EVER on the wall. you instantly screamed, asmodeus slamming the door open while clutching a towel.

“WHAT IS IT??”

“ITS A BUG.”

and at that, he screamed even louder and more high pitched than you did. you rubbed your temples, watching him panic at the sight of a bug. of course you were freaked out, but he’s the biggest drama queen you know and if you didn’t get rid of it, he’d hold the biggest grudge in hell. you reached for a lotion bottle, throwing it at the wall where the bug stood. sadly, you missed. the bug went down towards the bottom of the wall, and you grabbed yet another product to throw at it before asmo protested.

“you missed once, dont try again!”

you huffed, winding back your arm to throw the container. yet again, you missed. now, as the tiny thing crawled closer and closer, you and a barely covered asmo cowered on the bed together waiting for one of his brothers to come and save you.

Satan

you pulled yourself onto the counter, practically jumping up as you yelped and grabbed your lovers arm, pointing wordlessly to the bug on the floor.

“oh hush, its tiny.”

“i dont care, kill it!”

he looked between you and the bug, about to step on it before you protested again.

“ew its gonna be on the kitchen floor! put it outside first!”

to which he furrowed his brows, but he loved you so he was going to listen to your orders when you said to put the bug outside before killing it so it wouldn’t bother you. he chased the bug out with his foot, looking back once both were outside.

“are you happy now?”

“very.”

to which, he squashed the creature with the tip of his shoe, wiping it clean on the ground before coming back for you to thank him with a small kiss on the cheek, to which he rolled his eyes as he lifted you up and down from the counter by your waist.

Beezebulb

to say he was confused was an understatement.

this was the first he’d seen you freak out this hard and much less over a bug, so he has no clue what he should do in this situation.

“kill it, beel!” you watched cautiously as the bug practically circled the table. if you didnt know any better, you’d say it was taunting you. he however saw no problem with the bug, “its just a bug, its not bothering you.”

he held out his hand for you to hold and get down from the table, but obviously you refused.

“beel! just kill the damn bug already!” you complained, panicked eyes shifting between him and the bug who stood in place.

he didn’t care much for killing the bug. he stood next to the table, eating his fries and watching the bug with you. this action confused you.

“beel, please! i have to get down so i can charge my phone!” you complained yet again, but he still ignored you.

after a while of your pleading and whining (really once he finished his fries), he walks off and leaves the room. you’re about to yell for him when he comes back with a tissue that he used to squish the bug and throw it out before offering to help you down again.

Belphegor

you attempted to shake him awake, your legs against your chest as you looked between Belphegor’s sleeping figure and the nasty unknown creature on the floor.

“belphegor,, belphegor,, WAKE UP”

you shook aggressively, eventually resulting in smacking his arm til he lazily rubbed his eyes.

“and what are you waking me up at 4 in the afternoon for?”

he rolled over to face you, glaring up at you a bit with tired eyes. you pointed to the ground, softly mumbling,

“theres a weird demon bug on the floor.”

you frowned scooting closer to belphegor and panicking a bit when it inched a bit closer to the bed.

your boyfriend sighed, moving your legs down from against your chest and pulling you down to rest against the pillows again, all so he could properly hold onto your waist as he closed his eyes again.

“oh hush, it’ll go away eventually or beel will kill it. nap with me.”

you should’ve known he was going to be no help at all.

i just wanna thank you all so so soooo much for waiting and being so patient with me, i know i was sooo unactive these past couple months but trust me i’ll keep a steady schedule of at least one fic biweekly if i can, but for now i’ll try and churn out as many fics as possible! i’m also working on a masterlist and an intro! again, thank you all so much for your patience!

[whimsifawn]

so to the 5 doafp fans left in this world, just sharing that this just happened and i’m losing my mind, thank you

[imavikingo]

I said this in tags on another post, but it’s relevant and deserves its own post (I should be reading my usual pre- sleeping fic selection, BUT! I had this revelation -being sleepy is useful once again! -)

They NEEDED Steve to disappear, to be gone. To never care about Bucky anymore. That way they could treat Bucky as they see fit, and that means treating him like shit.

Steve would NEVER accept or allow Bucky to make amends, he would NEVER let the government take care of Bucky or be part of his “rehabilitation” in any way shape or form. That’s why he became Nomad, that’s why Bucky stayed in Wakanda. He would had fight with teeth and nails for Bucky.

“He died already more than once! He was a victim! A prisoner of war. He saved the fucking universe. What the fuck do you mean with amends!”

He became a wanted criminal for that same reason, to not let them have Bucky (nor other people in a fucking watchlist)

They needed Steves relationship with Bucky to become bitter, to be nothing more than a memory.

Steve being in retirement wouldn’t have cut it and…

Bucky was always going to follow Steve, no matter what.

So they needed him to stay alone (or with a companion that didn’t really care as much as Steve, enter Sam)

This way they killed two birds with one stone in Endgame: Reinforcing Steves “love” for Peggy, because “he’s NOT gay, you guys!”, and the partial isolation of Bucky.

[muchmossymess]

Like they just did that and moved on

[snowyroads]

I’m glad we all agree that Joe was soooo different this presser!!!😭😭 like ive seen so many posts about it and I just love how in tune we all are!!!😭😭💗

[cowboy-robooty]

Gus showed me that my cringe ass itager animatic i made when i was 14 got uploaded to bilibili and I'm so fucking embarassed because that video looks like shit (DONT WATCH IT. PLEASE. ITS SO HUMILIATING IM LIKE OH MY GOD I DID NOT KNOW HOW TO DRAW) but i check on it to read the comments and im like uwaghww *cries* because the chinese are so nice to meeeeeee

[stupidrant]

Speed runners messed up everything im sorry its true or else we wouldnt have unnecessary discourse today

[batcavescolony]

Reading comics is just

Readers: omg (character's character trait/thing that happened to the character) We could really go into it, imagine expanding on it? What if-

Comics: yeah, no. We're never gonna bring this up again.

Readers: but its-

Comics: NEVER.BEING.BROUGHT.UP.AGAIN.