#no one will read this but it still makes me happy so OH WELL
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Sorry Won't Fix This
lando norris x fem reader
summary: Lando makes the biggest mistake of his life, bigger than any apology, and you both hoped there was a way to fix it. Unfortunately, you both wished it at different times. (5.5k words)
warnings: angst, cheating, mentions of sex, manipulation, mede up characters, use of Y/N
a/n: I FINALLY WROTE MORE ANGST! This is a long one and I held nothing back. I really did try to make it as hurtful and dramatic as possible and ngl I was inspired by 'Don't worry darling' for a tiny part of this (you'll know when you read it) but anyway, this one does NOT have a happy ending so please let me know what you think!
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You had a terrible feeling, but you were too scared to look into it, terrified you would be right.Â
Truth is, you started feeling like that just a few weeks ago, when you went back to Landoâs apartment to surprise him with lunch and found an empty room and the bed unmade from somebody sleeping on it. Any other day that wouldâve been completely normal, but you had stayed with him the night before and made the bed as soon as you both got up to get ready for your separate plans for the day, leaving a perfectly made bed to come back to.Â
Before that day, you wouldâve never in a million years thought that Lando would cheat on you. He had always been so loving and caring, even before you started dating, and once you officially became a thing, he would constantly remind you how much he loved you, and on special days he was the most romantic person ever, and you always thought that you would spend the rest of your life with him, but now... you didnât want to think about it, but you couldnât bury the thought of him with someone else after it crossed your mind briefly while looking at the messy bed.
Later that night you asked him about it, trying hard not to sound like you were accusing him of something, but his excuse just made you feel worse, your suspicions growing.
âWhat do you mean?â He asked as he inspected his bed, unsure of what was wrong with it.Â
âWell, you know, I made the bed this morning before we left, remember?â
âOh, uh- yeah, I came back to- to take a nap,â he stuttered, not even looking at you.Â
But it kept happening, a few more times.
Things started to change after that; he cancelled the plans you made for when he came back home, he suddenly was too busy every day and your presence might be a distraction for all the things he had to get done for the next race, he was so tired at night he didnât have the energy for anything, and he even asked you to go back to sleep in your own apartment, claiming he just needed to sleep on his own to be comfortable, even though you were used to sleeping together.
Long story short, he was distant; he was never around anymore, and even when he was, you felt like you were missing him. He was just... different, and you were beating herself up wondering what had changed.
He, on the other hand, didnât miss you, seeing he didnât make an effort anymore and he could go days without answering a text or returning a call, ââand it was not because you took a long time to reply; you would always respond in a heartbeat if it was him. If it werenât for all the times you visited him at his apartment when a news outlet brought up that he was back in Monaco to make sure he was doing okay, you wouldnât talk to each other at all.
But today you were feeling hopeful. It was your anniversary, and you had a date night planned â a date he didnât cancel, so you took the entire afternoon to do your nails, your hair, and pick a beautiful dress to wear, his favourite dress. Your makeup took a while, but you still managed to be ready on time for the wonderful night you had ahead, so you made your way to him, your palms sweating when you knocked on the door.
âY/N? What are you doing here?â Was the first thing he asked, wiping her smile off of her face.
âI thought we would go out tonight,â you replied, looking down at your hands to hide your clear disappointment.
âOh- I guess I forgot to tell you but I remembered I have an important meeting tomorrow morning, so Iâm not gonna make it." The door was barely open, and he was standing where the crack was, blocking his apartment as he held the door with a strong grip.
âOkay,â your voice was so faint you barely heard it yourself. âDo you need anything? I could stay here for a couple of hours.â
âNo, donât worry about it. I think itâs better if you leave.â
Tears pricked your eyes, swallowing the small lump forming in your throat. âWhy?â
âWell, Iâm busy with a few things. You know, I have a really early day tomorrow, and you canât really help me with a McLaren meeting, can you?â
You shook your head slowly âI guess Iâm leaving then.â
The tears you had been holding started to fall as soon as you turned around; you could feel your mascara clumping on your eyelashes and forming black streaks down your cheeks, ruining the contour and highlight you applied in hopes of impressing your boyfriend. You ran back to your car and let it all out once you closed the door. You really thought things would be different tonight, but you were wrong.
You started driving to your best friendâs house, desperate to vent about how terrible your relationship was going since you had been keeping a secret from everyone; the last thing you needed was the media to get in the middle of this.Â
âOh my god, Y/N. Are you okay?â Mia asked you when she saw the mascara tears.
You shook your head as you stepped inside, small whimpers leaving your lips as you tried to stop the crying.
âWhat happened?â She took your hand and guided you to the couch.
âLando.âÂ
âWhat about Lando?â
âI think heâs cheating on me." You had never said that out loud, and saying it broke your heart even more. âI wish I was crazy, but the signs... I know he is.â
âIâm not trying to defend him or anything, but what makes you think that?â
âEverything, Mia. He has been acting so... distant. Ever since-â You stopped yourself. You never told anyone your relationship with Lando wasnât doing so well, making up excuses to cover his. You just wanted to hold on to everyone elseâs idea of you two, thinking you were the perfect couple.
âWhat? Have you guys been fighting?â
You took a deep breath before saying, âRemember the last time I stayed over at his apartment?â She nodded in response, âWell, later that day I went back to surprise him with lunch, but he wasnât there and the bed was a complete mess, and you know I always make the bed when I wake up. He said he went back to take a nap, but he was supposed to be with Carlos all morning, and it didnât make sense he had time to come back, take a nap, and then leave again, so I asked Carlos, and they didnât meet at all that day. Is that insane?â
"No, Y/N, of course not.â Mia didnât know what to say; she wanted to comfort you but she didnât know how. âAnd heâs been acting weird since then?â
You nodded, wiping your tears away. âYeah, heâs been pushing me away since that day. Telling me he doesnât have time because heâs so busy with the season, which I understand, but not even answering a couple of texts? And cancelling every date we had planned?â
âIs that what happened today? I thought it was your anniversary.â
âIt is.â You were nibbling on your lip profusely, looking up so tears would stop falling. âI donât know what Iâm gonna do.â
âHave you told him how you feel?â You shook your head again; you hated confrontation, and you were hoping you didnât have to do that. âI think you should go talk to him.â
âRight now?â
âIf not now, then when? You say youâve been feeling like somethingâs off for a while, but you havenât said anything to him.â
âI donât know Mia-â
âIf he is cheating on you then you need to break up with him, you donât deserve to be in that situation, and you deserve to know the truth.â
You inhaled as you considered what Mia just said. She was right, but to be completely honest, you werenât ready yet. âI really want to know, but I can't.â
âWhy not?â
âBecause what if he is?â Tears started rolling down your face again, Mia hugging you tight as soon as it happened. âI love him, and... I just want things to go back to normal.â
âI know you do, but believe me, itâs better if you know.â
You stayed there for a while, but ultimately decided to go talk to him, but you needed to put yourself back together before confronting him. Mia helped you to wash your face and fix your hair, comforting you and offering to stay with you once the two of you were done talking. You accepted; you didnât want to be alone, and Anne, your flatmate, had been going out of town a lot recently, so your apartment was empty, and you knew itâd be a long night.
Once you felt better and ready to talk to him, Mia drove you to his place as you repeated in your head everything you wanted to tell him. You knocked loudly and didnât stop until he opened. He looked annoyed, and you stormed inside as soon as he opened the door.
âWhat are you doing?â
âWe need to talk.â
âAbout what?âÂ
You blinked at him twice. Did he not think you needed to talk? âAbout us, Lando. Whatâs going on?â
âI donât know what youâre talking about.â
Okay, now you were mad. âLando, you have been ignoring me for days, and I understand if youâre busy, but it doesnât explain you pushing me away at all times.â
âIâm sorry if you feel that way.â
There was a moment of silence, both of you staring at each other as you tried to remember the questions you were supposed to ask, but none of them seemed to make sense now that you were standing in front of him âThatâs all youâre gonna say?â
âWhat do you want me to say?âÂ
âHow about you tell me exactly whatâs going on?â
You were both raising your voices, but Lando especially. âI told you already, Iâve been busy with the season-â
âI couldâve stayed here with you or gone with you to races if that meant spending more time together, like we have done before.â
âBut why would you want to do that?â
âTo keep you company, maybe?âÂ
âBut all you do is stand around while I do my job.â
âLando, do you know how many weeks Iâve spent away from home just so we can be together? And you donât even care anymore, you didnât even care to say thank you.â
âI never asked you to come,â he mumbled.
You scoffed before shaking your head. âI wanted to, you know I worry about you when you stress yourself out about a race, you tend to overwork yourself-â
âI. Never. Asked. You. To. Come." He interrupted you, his tone punctuated with each word. âI wouldâve been fine without you, I donât need you in my hair at all times." His eyes hardened, his mouth opening to speak again. âDonât you have better things to do?â
âI just- Iâm your girlfriend, I guess I thought you liked to be with me.â
âI do, but you donât have to be so clingy all the time.â
You didnât say anything, hoping you heard it wrong or that heâd apologise, but he didn't. âWhat?â
âYou know, we do everything together and-â
âNo, we used to do things together, not everything." You corrected him.
He took a deep breath, as if he was done dealing with you. âRight. Look, Iâm tired, we can talk tomorrow.â
You nodded, holding back the tears as you walked towards the door. âHappy anniversary,â you said before slamming it closed and running back to Miaâs car.
Lando sat on his couch with his head between his hands for a moment. How could he forget? He took a deep breath as he got up, looking for a ribbon and a gift he bought for you who knows how long ago.
He made his way to Miaâs flat; he assumed you would be there, and your car parked outside confirmed his suspicions, so he knocked on the door a couple of times before saying, âBaby, Iâm sorry. I was caught up in all the things I have to do before leaving, and I didnât realise what day it was." But he got no response. âY/N please, I know youâre here. Will you please talk to me?â
âGo away, Lando.â Mia was the one to yell, making Lando realise he would not be able to fix it, not tonight anyway.Â
âOkay, Iâm leaving this here. I- I love you.â
You called in sick for your job the next day, your sore eyes and pounding headache being the only things you could think about. Well, that and Lando.
You were staring at the gift he bought for your one-year anniversary â what you were supposed to celebrate the day before. It was beautiful, and you couldnât believe he remembered you mentioning it on one of your first dates ever, but it was the letter inside that broke your heart. It looked... unfinished, like he didnât even care enough to give it a proper ending, so you were wondering how long ago he stopped working on it.
The days after that were rough, long nights of wondering what you could have possibly done wrong, but even then you didnât talk to him. He tried to, a couple of times, but you needed a little bit of time.
A couple of weeks went by, and you found yourself alone at your apartment, catching up on the work you missed for calling in sick so many times.
It was your birthday, and Mia insisted a million times you go out and celebrate, clear your head, and forget about Lando once in for all, but somehow it felt wrong; you had made plans with Lando a few months back to bring your family to a race so they could finally meet him, but obviously that wasnât happening anymore, so what was the point of celebrating? You just needed to focus and get things done anyway.
You were thankful that Mia had been for you through it all; you really were, but sometimes crying alone did more for you than having someone tell you âeverything's gonna be okay.' You were tired of hearing that.
Hours later, you found yourself with a cup of coffee to finally catch up on the last project. It wasnât really that much of a workload, and you didnât need to stay up all night to do that, but you were going to anyway. Perhaps you just wanted to be productive, or maybe that was you trying to occupy your mind from the possibility of your boyfriend cheating on you.
You looked at the clock; it was 11:30 PM. You sighed, typing away whatever you were supposed to on your laptop, your eyes sore from staring at it for too long, when a text message interrupted you.
Unknown [Attachment: 1 photo]
Unknown: I heard they have been at it for a while.
That text message induced such a great shock on your tired, worn-out body, tears falling down your face as soon as you read it. You didnât want to open it as you were sure of what this was about, but your curiosity got the best of you.
Tapping on the notification, you prepared yourself mentally to confirm your terrible suspicions. And they were confirmed.
Your vision was blurry from the tears, but you were able to see Lando standing next to his new Ferrari, and he was with someone else, except you couldnât see who it was, the big jacket and a beanie protecting her identity. He was smiling down at her, eyes full of... love? Those green eyes you thought he reserved for you only, but clearly you were wrong. His big hands were around her waist as hers went around his neck, and his lips were stained with lipstick.
You broke down crying, curled up on your bed as you wore one of Landoâs hoodies that still smelt like him. You now knew what the truth was, but you didnât want to accept it. What happened to you two? When did he stop loving you?
It was like your heart was ripped from your chest; all that time you spent together down the drain like it was nothing, like it all meant nothing to him.
You didnât know for how long you cried the night before, but it was now 1 PM and you were just waking up, so you probably cried for hours. There was nothing left you could do to save your relationship, so you made up your mind to break up with him as soon as he came back from the American triple header.
Y/N: We need to talk, just let me know when youâre here.
The message was left unanswered, as usual. You rolled your eyes and put your phone down, returning to your video call with Mia.
âDo you know who that is?â
âNo, sorry.âÂ
You sighed as you sipped your hot coffee âWhat about the number? Do you know who sent the picture?â
âWhatâs the number? Maybe I can ask around to see if any of my friends know.â
You sent her the phone number, along with the picture of Lando and the other girl. âThanks. Donât show anyone that picture thought. Iâm already embarrassed as it is.â
âEmbarrassed? Y/N, he should be the embarrassed one, you didnât do anything wrong.â
âMaybe I did-â
âNo, stop doing that to yourself. We both know itâs not your fault.â
You nodded. âI canât help it. I just donât understand.â
âUnderstand what?â
âWas I not enough? Why did he need to find someone else?â
Mia hated to see you going through that, how you felt like you were not enough or that it all ended because of you, and she hated Lando for causing all of that. âI know itâs hard right now, but I promise youâll understand that none of this is your fault. Y/N youâre amazing, and heâs an idiot for not realising.â
Talking to her made you feel better, but all those terrible emotions came back whenever you looked at the picture again, a million questions invading your mind. How long has he been doing this? Who is she? Does he still love you? What did you do wrong?
A couple of days later, Lando finally replied to your text.
Lando: Just got back. Iâm in my apartment
Your heart sank at the notification; you didnât want to talk to him; you didnât want things to be over. There was still a part of you that hoped everything was just a misunderstanding, hoping he wasnât cheating on you and she was just a friend. But deep down you knew the truth, and the possibility of it being a mix-up was down to zero, and after he made it clear that he didnât want to be in a relationship with you anymore, you decided to fulfil his wishes.
It was a long drive to his home; it felt longer than usual, but maybe you were just dreading the conversation you knew was about to happen.
You took a deep breath before knocking on the door, Lando opening it almost right away.
"Hey,â he said faintly, worried he got caught.
âHi.â You entered the apartment you once thought you would move into and looked around. You had been there a million times, and so many of those times were special little moments you shared together, but right now it felt like you were disconnected from the space. âHow was the triple header?â
âNot great- I donât know. It was messy, I guess." He tried to give you a smile but stopped himself when he noticed your stare full of fury. âWhat did you want to talk about?â
Seriously? âIâm breaking up with you." Your voice was weak, but you did not dare let a tear slip past your waterline; he didnât deserve to see you cry.Â
âWhat?â The shock in his eyes looked so real that you almost believed him âWhy?â
âDid you really just ask that?â
âSo thatâs it? Weâre over?â
âLando, come on, weâve been over for a while." You stepped closer to him, pain and anger written all over your face as the tears struggled to stay on your eyes. âWe didnât even feel like a couple anymore. Lando, you forgot our anniversary, and that day you made it clear you wanted nothing to do with me. And to think I planned a beautiful night for us and bought you a great gift. Do you have any idea how stupid I felt?âÂ
âI didnât know you were feeling like that.â
âOf course not, when have you ever listened to me anyway?â
Lando rolled his eyes âOkay, I understand, but we donât have to break up, I already explained what happened that day, I was busy and completely lost track of time.â
âAnd I guess she doesnât have anything to do with this?â You showed him the picture, his demeanour changing immediately.
âY/N, I- Iâm sorry, baby, Iâm so sorry." His eyes and his voice softened as he tried to reach for you, but you turned around and wiped the tears that managed to leave your eyes, a million questions flooding your mind again.
âSo itâs true." You were just confirming to yourself what you already knew. Anger and pain washed over your body. Why her? Why her when youâve been nothing but perfect to the man you loved the most?
âBaby, I can explain.âÂ
You turned around to face him again âWho is she?â He shook his head, his eyes begging you not to make him say it while yours watered, âWho is she?â You repeated.
âYou donât wanna know.â
âWhy? Cause I might find out youâre cheating?â
A few tears started to roll down his face, his hands desperate to hold yours. âI canât.â
âWhy not?â
âCause youâre gonna hate me even more." You stared at him, even more tears falling as you tried to think who the girl could be.Â
âDid you two- did you sleep with her?â His nod was barely perceptible; if you didnât already know the answer, you wouldâve missed it. Maybe he was right; maybe itâd be better if you didnât know.Â
âIâm sorry, baby, Iâm so sorry.â
âStop it.â
âI know I fucked up, but she doesnât mean anything to me, I swear.â
âShut up, Lando. I just⊠I donât understand.â
âLet me explain-â
âAnd I donât care how many times you apologise, how do you expect me to forgive you?â You took a couple of steps back, trying to figure out what caused him to do such a thing. âEven if we stayed together and got married and started a family, how can I ever look at you and not think about that?â
"Baby, I want all of that, I want the rest of my life with you, like we talked.â
âThat was before you ruined everything.â
âI know what i did is wrong-â
âWrong?â
âBut we can work this out.â
âWhat? No, Lando, stop.â
âJust give me another chance, please.â
âIs that why you've been so distant, huh? Was she here on our anniversary?â Lando didnât say anything, and the flashes from Lnadoâs knuckles turning white from holding the door closed that night creeped your mind. Your heart ached so much that every time you breathed deeply, it was scorching you to the core âHow could you do that?â
âI shouldnât have done that, Iâm sorry.â
âStop apologising.â
âYou know I didnât mean it.â
âJust stop⊠god.â
âY/N just hear me out, I swear it only happened once.â
âAre you fucking kidding me? I know thatâs not true. Do you know how many times I came to an unmade bed? And how many excuses you made?â He stayed silent. âI donât care how many times it happened, you still did it and nothing is gonna change that.â
âI know.â
âYouâve been hurt before, right? What if I was the one cheating? Would you just forget it ever happened and come back to me?â Once again, he didnât say anything. âNo. Of course you wouldnât. Lando, how could I ever forget what you did? Or everything you said to me when we were fighting, and the fact that you lied and- and cheated-â
âBut you came all the way here.â
âBecause I care, and you... you never cared, you never tried-â
âI care, I care so much. Baby, please, you have to believe me." He tried to reach out to you, but you pushed his hand away.
"No, you donât, and if Iâm here, itâs because I know after this weâll never see each other again, weâll never talk again and this just has to end.â
âBut I donât want it to end.â
âWell, you ended it when you cheated on me.â
He stared at you for a moment before continuing. âBut⊠I want you, she didnât mean anything to me." He approached you again, his hope growing a little when you didnât stop him. He put a strand of hair behind your ear, softly brushing your cheek. âI know I fucked up but I canât go on without you, I just can't.â
âWell you have, countless times while I was left in the dark wondering if I had done something wrong, crying myself to sleep when I couldnât get a hold of you, Lando, and in the meantime you were with her.â
âIâm sorry-â
âAnd you have the nerve to say all that shit to me, acting like I was suffocating you when in reality I was trying to save us!â You pushed him away.
âIâm so sorry.â
âNo, youâre not.â
âY/N, Iâm sorry, please letâs talk about it.â
âFine, letâs talk about it. Was she worth it?â He shook his head, ready to leave his pride behind as he kneeled in front of you and grabbed one of your hands. âWhat are you doing? Stop.â
âI promise it was an accident, it wonât happen again.â
âAn accident? Lando, are you hearing yourself right now?â
âPlease, donât let me go." The grip on your hand tightened, pulling you closer to him.
âIsnât that what you wanted?âÂ
âNo. I donât want anyone else, I want you, Y/Nâ
âYou donât have to worry about me anymore.â
âBut everything I said... I meant it, I love you Y/N and every second weâve been together has meant everything to me. Baby, you have to understand.â
âLiar.â
âIâm not lying, you know Iâm not." You pushed his hand away, rolling your eyes when another tear rolled down his face. âI know I donât deserve it but please... just one more chance and I can fix this.â
âGive you a chance? I gave you a chance when I believed your excuses, when I forgave you for cancelling every date we had planned, when I tried to understand why you locked me out, and when I almost forgave you for forgetting our anniversary, I gave you so many fucking chances!â
âBut I swear it wasnât like that, she meant nothing.â
âYouâre unbelievable⊠god, what are you saying?â
âJust think about how great we are together,â he said, trying to hold your torso, but once again you stopped him.Â
âLando, stop that.â
âWeâre a great team, arenât we? We understand each other so well, we know each other better than anyone else, god, Iâll do anything, I swear.â
âNo, itâs not gonna work.â
âYes it will, and Iâll make sure of that.â
âNo.â You were having a hard time blocking out how much love you still had for him, but you werenât forgiving him; there was no way.
âI swear I donât want anyone else." He held your hands and started kissing them, his lips giving you a sense of home that you missed. "Y/N, please, I love you.âÂ
You nodded weakly as you started crying again.
âYou know I love you and I would do anything for you." He continued kissing you, a few tears falling on your hands. âDo you still love me?â
âI love you... Lan-â You released one of your hands from his grip, squeezing your eyes shut and covering your face.
âSee? It will work, we will make it work." You shook your head; you were feeling stupid for almost falling for that. "Baby, look at me, itâs going to be okay, I promise.â
A moment of silence fell into the room as you collected your thoughts again, and he just looked at you hopeful that he could get you back. âWho is she?â You dared to repeat the question as you looked at him again.
He didnât say anything for a few seconds, his voice barely above a whisper when he finally answered. "Annie.â
Annie, your flatmate Annie. She had never met Lando before you, and she wasnât interested in who he was when you first told her you started dating him, so you were the reason they knew each other for all those times he picked you up from your place, and even then you never considered them to be friends; they barely exchanged any words when they ran into each other. You felt betrayed on a whole new level, not only by Lando but by her too. You had lived with her for so long, literally since the day you moved to Monaco, so you thought of her as one of your closest friends; how could she do that? And these past weeks, when she had been mourning your relationship with Lando, she was there the whole time, and she knew exactly what was happening.
âHow long?â
You were getting annoyed at how long it was taking him to answer your simple questions. âThe day we went to meet my parents... I drove to your apartment to pick you up, but you werenât there yet.â
âSo you did it at my place?â It wasnât really a question, and you felt even more disgusted at the thought of them in your own home.
âIt was one moment of weakness.â
âOne moment of weakness?â He nodded, his hands now holding on to your hips. âBut it didn't stop there, did it?â
âIâm sorry.â
You swiped the tears away as you prepared to ask the question you had been asking yourself for weeks. âWhat does she give you that I can't?â
Lando shook his head quickly. âNothing, youâre everything I could ever ask for.â
âThen why did you do that?â
He didnât have an answer; he didnât really know how it happened or why it kept going, but he couldnât deny he was enjoying it before he got caught. âI donât know." He whispered.
âDo you love her?â
âNo, of course not. I love you." He was holding you tighter, convinced that if he held you long enough, you would want to stay.
âOh my god, Iâm so stupid.â
âYou know it didnât mean anything, it was a mistake-â
âGet your hands off me, Iâm leaving,â you said as you tried to free yourself.
âBaby, please donât leave, you have to hear me out.â
âLando, let go. I donât wanna be here." Your words struggled to come out from how much you were crying.Â
âPlease donât, I donât wanna let you go." He looked up at you, his eyes begging for forgiveness. âLetâs just talk about it, yeah? Let me explain.â
âSave it, Lando, itâs over.âÂ
âIâm sorry, I wonât do it again. This is obviously my fault, so Iâll do whatever it takes to get you to stay, just please, one more chance is all Iâm asking for.â You finally freed yourself, and your only goal was to go back to your apartment and cry all your pain away. You turned around and headed to the door; his hand tried to come to stop you, but you flinched away. You couldnât bear to hear another word from him. "Baby, please, I love you.â
You turned around to face him one last time, spotting Lando still on his knees in the middle of his living room. âSo youâve said, but how can you hurt someone you claim to love so much?â He was about to say something, but you didnât wanna hear it. âThereâs nothing you can do to get me to stay, you threw everything away.â
âI know, my love, but-â
âIâm gonna leave and youâre gonna stay here, just⊠leave me alone, I donât ever wanna see you again.â
You exited the room, leaving Lando alone and a complete mess. He regretted what he did, and he wanted to think that if you would just give him a chance to explain himself, youâd forgive him. But he knew that would never be the case and that his mistake was bigger than any apology; you were right to leave him.
He stared at the door for too long, taking in every emotion he was feeling: remorse, anger, pain, agony... he just felt like life was being sucked out of his body because he ruined the most important part of it, and thereâs no one to blame but himself.
#lando norris#ln4#lando norris x reader#lando norris fanfic#lando norris imagine#lando norris x you#lando norris angst#lando norris x y/n#lando norris oneshot#lando norris smut#lando norris one shot#ln4 fluff#ln4 fic#ln4 imagine#giannaln4 writes
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Could you do how Jinx would react If you would give her a Love confession similiar to the one lexie gave mark in greys anatomy headcanons?
of course! thank you for being my first request! iâd like to preface this by saying iâve seen 0% of greys anatomy. i did watch a clip and do some reading but there may still be some inaccuracies, i apologize </3 i did also take a few creative liberties for the sake of drama
i started writing this before act 3 dropped (no spoilers, dw) and now i'm finishing it to cope. LMAO
summary: headcanons for jinx receiving a confession similar to the one mark received in greys anatomy.
characters included: jinx
tags/warnings: fluff, slight hurt/comfort, (happy) crying. lots of fluff
men dni.
â§.* you and jinx were both working under silco before he passed. the news of his passing hit you like a pile of bricks. you had grown relatively close to him- well, as close as one of his employees could grow to him. but you cared for him.
â§.* however, the position paid well, even after silco's passing. so you decided to stay.
â§.* you had also, for lack of a better term, completely fallen for your coworker, jinx.
â§.* unfortunately for you, you had come to this realization while you were in a relationship with somebody else.
â§.* it came as such a shock to you, because you were happy, your girlfriend adored you. you adored your girlfriend. but the more you fell for jinx, the less you could stand to be with your girlfriend and hurt her.
â§.* so, you broke up with her. you told her that she was incredible, that she was a lovely person and you were sorry you couldnât do more for her. but you were in love with somebody else.
â§.* and that leaves you here. with your colleague who has captured your heart, who you've just finished a successful mission with and wants to celebrate with you. and the fact that she has no idea of your feelings eats at you.
â§.* jinx beaming at you, the rare smile on her face as she makes her way towards you, jumping in excitement.
â§.* the two of you had just made it back to jinx's hideout, surrounded by her colorful wall tags and assorted gadgets.
â§.* "oh, did you see the look on their faces?! that was incredible, (y/n)! it was so-"
â§.* you just couldn't hold back. tears were welling in your eyes, your hands were trembling, and you couldn't bring yourself to meet jinx's gaze.
â§.* jinx stepped forward, her concern written across her face. "you okay?"
â§.* "i love you." you blurted out, now lifting your head to look jinx directly in the eye. you were delirious, you were confused, you were relieved. relieved to finally tell her.
â§.* "oh my god, that was so sudden, it just came out- i love you. i love you, jinx." you continued, your voice shaking. now that you had started, you couldn't stop. just how long had these feelings festered, deep inside of you? how much longer could you hold onto them?
â§.* jinx's expression was unreadable. her mouth agape, her pink eyes were blown wide. her shoulders were strangely tense, but you could tell that her full attention was on you.
â§.* "i love you. i love you, and i've been trying not to say it.. but i can't. it's so hard. it's so hard to repress it, to ignore it, to act like everything is fine but the truth is that i love you more than anything."
â§.* tears started falling from your eyes, yet you went on as if nothing was happening. "my ex was a great girl, she's incredible, she's gorgeous, and she isn't a master criminal- and she loved me. but it was never gonna work out."
â§.* jinx stepped closer to you, slowly, achingly slowly.
â§.* "i- i love you. i'm so in love with you.." tears kept falling, falling, falling. but the words kept coming. "it's like i'm infected by jinx." you chuckled dryly, using your arm to wipe underneath your eyes.
â§.* "i can't think of anything, or anybody, i can't sleep.. i can't breathe. i love you, jinx. all the time. now and forever." you concluded, your breath coming in heavy pants after your tirade. you mustered up the best smile you could for the woman across from you, taking agonizingly slow steps toward you.
â§.* when jinx finally was in close enough proximity, her face mere inches from yours, both of her hands gently cupped your cheeks. the pads of her thumbs swiping underneath your wet eyes. the corners of her lips turned upward ever so slightly.
â§.* "you... love me?" she whispered, voice low.
â§.* and at this, you genuinely were in disbelief. you laughed, heartily, only for a minute. jinx's eyes went wide yet again, and you could tell she was beginning to panic. what if she had misheard you? was this a dream? was she-
â§.* "i think i've made that pretty clear, jinx. yes. i love you."
â§.* the worry washed away from her, and her arms wrapped around your waist. holding you ever so gently, as if you were made of porcelain. as if she was afraid she would break you if she held on too tight. you've never seen her be so delicate with somebody.
â§.* she pressed a chaste, lingering kiss to your cheek.
â§.* "that's good." jinx replied, turning her head to the side to rest it on your shoulder. "because i think i love you too."
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The glass queen
The glass queen (18+)
Characters - King JK x queen Y/N reader (Woman)
Genre - Royal Au, heavy angst (?), drama, suggestive/smut, fluff, THIS is fiction
Summary - In a once-thriving kingdom, filled with love and care, the queen, who ruled along with her devoted husband, fell deeply ill. Desperate to save her, the king falls into a restless journey to try and restore what once was lost. Warnings - Illness and description of illness (the reader is sick), pregnancy and kind of baby craze from some characters, alluding to cheating (?), parental manipulation, double marriage (one is forced), misunderstandings, fictional characters, heavy feelings, harsh words, mentions of wishing to disappear and never return (once I think), mentions of blood, throwing up (not detailed). Jungkook is one loyal man I tell you. Warnings for the not so holy parts (18+) - Description of male and female parts. They bathe together, aphrodisiac usage and itercourse while on it, consensual but one time Jungkook doesnât remember, hickeys, Y/N on top once, no heavy/crazy stuff, they do it twice. I hate detailing about it soâŠRead at your own risk!
MINORS PLEASE STAY AWAY!
Authorâs note - Not as happy with this one, but oh well. If anyone wants to detail about the 18+ parts in a comment, I will copy and paste it! Tell me if I missed anything in the warnings or if there are any errors. Enjoy!
Word count - 16.5k
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There was once a glorious kingdom, a loving queen and her devoted king ruling it with wisdom and care. Their people were thriving under their protection after the heartbreak of the late king passing away had diminished.Â
Itâs been three years ever since prince Jungkook has tied the knot with you, making you the queen of his people and heart. Three years that were filled with love and devotion, three years that seemed to vanish in an unfortunate blink. âThe queen has fallen ill.â It all began on an autumn morning, both of you were ready to celebrate your third anniversary, a huge banquet was about to be held in honor of the king and queen of this land. But that morning was not the beginning of a celebration, a new year beside your king...Â
All that you remember to this day is the dizziness, the nausea. You felt like you couldnât breathe anymore, your lungs were suffocating in a burning pain. You couldnât speak or scream or cry, you laid there frozen, statue-like, taking in the misfortune that laid upon you.Â
You remember a doctor coming and checking on you, you remember your husbandâs worried eyes, your maiden crying, and beside the pain and fear, the only thing that stuck with you were the words âThe queen has fallen ill.â That was almost two years ago, the beginning of the nightmare you had been fighting ever since.Â
At first nobody knew what was happening to you. The doctors, unsure of the illness you were carrying. But your people wanted answers and nobody had them. They tested and tested, they tried all types of medicine, but your state only further declined. So they gave you a nickname, the glass queen.Â
The nickname haunted you. Fragile. Delicate. A figure meant to be admired but could never be touched. You hated it.
It made you feel weaker. Nobody knew how much you had left, if you would be getting better or not at all. The people grew impatient and slowly started their gossip, the whispers within the palace walls. âHow much could she still bear this, I wouldâve ended it much sooner in her place.â, âI pity her, just imagine the aches sheâs going throughâ, âJust think of the poor king, having to deal with such pain everyday.â. You heard them all, outside the palace being even worse. People expected you to be by their side and provide them with the duty you were given, the one of a queen. But you locked yourself in your room in shame, becoming weary of peopleâs eyes, showing yourself less and less, not wanting them to see how pitiful you have become. Truth to be told, you wouldâve withered away much faster under their insensitive words, only if it wasnât for Jungkook, your determination to live and fight further, hoping that one day you could return to what you once were.Â
He stayed by your side, day and night, devoted to you and only you. You hid away from him at times, ashamed of what has become of his queen, but he always saw the light shining deep inside of you, the light of wanting to survive, to be close to him and hold him without pain and worry once again. So he stayed by your side, blinding you from all the hate, not letting you know he was battling his own demons⊠âUnder no circumstances!â His jaw clenched, hands turned into fists. âJungkook! I am your mother and I know whatâs good for you, itâs time you look outside the box you created! The people are unhappy!â He scoffs looking at his mother in hatred, enraging her further.
âAnd I said no, Iâve been ruling for the past 5 years, do they not trust me? My judgment? Their king!â His voice raised in anger and disbelief.
âSheâs been like this for almost two years already, God knows how much she has left! You need an heir, if she dies, who's going to take over the throne?â the mother fights back, trying to open her child's eyes. He didnât want to succumb to fear, the fear of losing you, fear of everything youâve built crumbling at his feet, under his helpless gaze. Being a king was not easy, solving issues, pleasing people, arguing all day with his mom over this and that all while trying to help you overcome it all.
Jungkook had a lot on his plate, and now, a more ridiculous and outrageous request came in.
He needed an heir.Â
If the queen passes away heâll be a widower. He could still rule, yes, but his blood line would not continue, making him the last standing from his family, forcing a new power to take over what decades of his generation had already built.
âItâs not much I ask of you to do. You marry her, give an heir to the throne and then itâs your decision on how to handle things further.â He had refused to entertain the idea, long ago. Not wanting to believe that his own mother would impose such ridicule. Him, the king, having a concubine by his side since his sick wife could not bear children? Outrageous! âIâm not doing such awful thing to my wife. Donât you think sheâs gone through enough? If she finds out Iâm marrying a second woman she mightâŠâ Tears start to gather into his eyes in pure frustration. The thoughts of you leaving, eating him alive. How could he do something so cruel to you? âShe will understand, itâs her duty to bear a child, and since her illness she canât comply with it. She needs to understand this is for the better good of the kingdom!â Jungkook slouches in his chair in defeat, this is a battle he might never win. His mom has been pushing this idea for almost a year now. âYujin is a nice girl, sheâs the daughter of a duke! Trust me sheâs well fit to be your queeâŠâ âShe will never be a queen!â He shouts, fist hitting the desk in front of him in rage. âShe will never be my queen, I wonât allow it.â His mother scoffs and folds her arms looking away from her stubborn son. âIâm sending her here tomorrow to have dinner with you. Iâm tired of your antics, your father would be rolling in his grave knowing this is how you rule.â She spits out, tired of pointless arguing, before storming out of his office.Â
Jungkook sighs, fighting back the urge to scream and cry, to just run far away from all his responsibilities. He wants to be a powerful king, someone people will look up to and follow without fear. But his own self is breaking into pieces, crumbling more and more with the heaviness thrown on his shoulders. He raises from his chair defeated, ready to go and find his own support, his only safe place. Exiting his office he takes fast steps towards the chambers, but before he can enter the hallway his body collides with someone else. His arms are quick to catch and without any further thoughts he pulls you into his embrace, his body already recognizing yours, scent way too familiar to mistake your presence for someone else's. âWhat are you doing here, my love?â He cuddles you close to his chest, hand gently caressing your hair, his muscles relaxing. âYou should rest. Did the doctor come and you were scared?â
âNoâ You answer quietly, inhaling all of his sweet scent, grateful to receive his warmth . âIâve been bored. I waited all day for you to come, but you didnât even dare a second to pass by. Do you not love me anymore?â You ask teasingly, making him chuckle, his head shaking in denial. âHow can I not? Youâve been in my head all day, couldnât focus on any work.â He mumbles back making you smile, wrapping your weak arms around him. âThen carry me back to my room please, show me how much youâve missed your wife.â He laughs and in a rush he picks you up, you gasp. âA little too rough for my queen?â He says looking up at you, your hands resting on his shoulders while he was holding you from above your knees. âYou could try to be more gentle, I bruise easily.â You pout and he just maneuvers you in such a way that you end up being carried bridal style towards your room. Arriving, Jungkook places you gently on the bed, letting you sit on the edge. âYou seem to have something on your mindâ Looking at him fidgeting with his fingers. He is indeed a little restless, making you wonder why is he avoiding your gaze all of a sudden? âDonât worry about me, just work. Has the doctor come yet?â He asks like in a rush to leave and you nod âI should let you rest then, the medicine will kick in soon.â He bows down to your level kissing your forehead, but before he can leave you gently tug on his blazer. âWhy donât you stay? Itâs been long since we spent the night together.â You look up at him with expecting eyes, hoping that he can hold you close just for tonight. âYou should be tired, love. I will not hold onto your sleeping time today.â He says apologetically. âBut, Jungkook. You never come by anymoreâŠI miss you...â
You knew the reason he wasnât coming, you were getting weaker and he was afraid. Itâs been long since youâve shared a bed, let alone him daring to touch you in any other way. You craved him, even only his embrace and it would release the aching pains you were feeling. He was touching you like handling a frail piece of glass. You felt sad. But you canât condemn him, heâs your man and you know deep down he also wants to be close like before with you, but with all the medicine you must take itâs hard to even walk sometimes, let alone engage in other strenuous activities. So he kept his distance. And it pained you, to know you canât give him anything. To know he has to hide away from you. You felt the guilt, hurting more than the illness itself.
"Just stay tonight, letâs sleep here, together.â You plead for the last time, hoping itâs not in vain like any other nights, slightly ashamed to ask for more, to pursue harder. He tries to fight the urge, to just shove aside everything and love you like you deserve. But he canât.
You sigh at his silence, fighting the bitter taste in your mouth, his silence being enough of a response.
âI understandâŠyou must be tired tooâŠI think itâs better if you also head out to sleep, Iâm getting tired.â And you were. Tired of the burden you were carrying and casting above everyone else. Tired of cursing the people you loved.
You lay down between the mountain of pillows and blankets youâve collected along the years in hopes to soothe you better and by shoving your face in one you try to mask the tears that fall down on your face.
You close your eyes hearing him sigh before caressing your arm, leaving a kiss on your shoulder and then leaving. The room empty and cold without his presence.
You grab the pillow muffling your sound into it, throwing it across your beautiful room. You look outside the window, the sky dark, the moon shining above making you remember all the past moments you shared with Jungkook, walking into the dark of the night, holding hands, being deeply in love and without a care. When will you get them again? The walks and sleepless nights spent holding each other, the promises and dreams you made together, his hands gently caressing your body, lips making their way down your neck, the feeling of burning passion flowing in the air. You wish to disappear and never return. Life will be much easier for you and for those around, getting rid of the burden you bring, you feel meaningless.
Slowly you fall asleep, the substances finally making their way into your body, calming the pains you had.Â
Outside the door, without your notice, Jungkook was resting. His back pressed to the door, biting his lip in regret. He shouldâve held you. He shouldâve told you about whatâs to come, the pressure he was feeling. He shouldâve not run away like he always does when responsibility arises. Heâs still young and naive, tough. Brought to the throne before even turning the age of 18, still mourning his fatherâs death and now with a crown on his head, having to take over much harsher tasks. The only thing he had along, being you.
You were there when he needed you mostâŠbut now, when you need him most, he isnât here.Â
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The morning came by fast for Jungkook after spending almost all night by your door. The maids began waking him up and his personal adviser didnât even hesitate to shove down his throat the list of things he had to do for the day.
âMy lord, donât forget about the meeting with lady Yujin. Sheâs on her way to the palace.â The adviser reminds. âTell her not to come.â He says without hesitation, voice latched with indifference. âBut, my lord, our elder queen has said that itâs a must for you to attend.âÂ
He didnât want to enrage his mother, surely, but the thought of your heart breaking by meeting another woman was far worse. In his mind he was neglecting you already, but betrayal? Such thoughts would never dare cross his mind on their own.
âI will not attend then.â He manages to button up his shirt leaving his room with the stressed adviser following behind. âMy lord, please, itâs just a dinner meeting, nothing serious, the queen wonât know.â Jungkook stops in his steps, fists clenching in rage seeing how even his servants push this further, not respecting the status he has. âOne meal, thatâs all. After that I donât want to hear about her.â He finally complies, thinking you will not hear about this and he will just make it clear that he is not interested and end it all forever.Â
And so he found himself sitting in front of the duchess, Lady Yujin. She was beautiful, not to deny. Small body, always dressed in expensive dresses and jewelry. Her hair was curled up in a bun, fingernails perfectly done and a lingering, intoxicating perfume, the last point of her perfect image. Every man would fall for such high beauty, and despite her looks she was also young and vigorous, only 19 of age, 3 years younger than you two.
She was a refined lady, clearly showing that her parents were wealthy and put a lot of work into her education and manners, spoiling her with everything she desired.
âItâs a pleasure to be at the same table with you, my Grace.â Her voice was melodious, alluring even. âThank you for making time to be here, Lady Yujin.â Jungkook felt bothered by her presence, he wished the meal would end soon. âOh, please! Just call me Yujin, no need for formalities, my Grace.â she says, eyeing the man up and down. People referred to him as their grace all the time, but this gave him an ick, hearing it roll out of her tongue so easily, so nonchalantly.
âIâm here with a proposal, my dear father has sent me.â She picks up her tea cup, sipping slowly, every now and then locking eyes with the boy. âIâve heard the queen has fallen ill, I felt sorry to hear such unfortunate news.â She sighs sadly, her voice holding mock concern.
âSince then Iâve heard you two have been avoiding each other. Perhaps itâs the fact that sheâs weak and frail, or maybeâŠshe canât give an heir to the throne?â
Jungkook clenches his jaw, eyes darkening, the air around him heavy and suffocating when hearing her discuss matters like his wifeâs feelings didnât matter. âThe elder queen has gotten in contact with my family, proposing a marriage between the two of us in order for the kingdom to receive its precious descendant.â She continued, her lips curving into a coy smile.
Jungkookâs gaze bore into hers, his expression hardening. âIâm sorry to disappoint you, but my mother has not been in command since long ago. Iâm loyal to my wife and I donât need a mere concubine by my side. The queen is my wife, and she will remain so, heir or not.â he spits sharply.
The young girl tilts her head, a glimpse of bitterness could be catched for one second before her expression softens just enough to appear sympathetic. âYour loyalty is truly admirable, my Grace.âÂ
Her tone was almost sweet, while her fingers played slowly with her curls, twirling them around. âBut loyalty does not sustain a kingdom. Your people grow fears, they doubt your judgment, they wonder what would happen to their land after you lose the throne.â She sighs once again, trying to appear concerned for others. âSooner or later, your MajestyâŠâ she said, leaning closer, her voice dropping just above a whisper âYou will have to choose. And faced with the options of loving her or the survival of your empire, what will your judgment decide upon?â Her words were harsh, showing parts of her true self. Jungkook's breath hitched at her boldness. His mind recognizing the guilt trap she was setting, but his heart was aching.
He is the king, his main priority is to protect his people before all. He was already faced with splitting between love and responsibility.
âPerhaps we can discuss mathers in further meetings.â she said, her voice smooth, uninterested in toying with him anymore. âI know Your Grace will make the best decision regarding the safety of people.â She offered a graceful smile, while rising from the chair.
âLetâs meet again tomorrow. Itâs my first time here, I would love to be shown around.â âOf course.â He stood up as well, the tension beneath him almost breaking his calm exterior. âUnfortunately I have a long list of duties that call my name. I will have one of the servants arrange a proper tour for you, Lady Yujin.â His tone was cold, a quiet reminder that despite her boldness, he was still the one in control.Â
Yujinâs lips parted wanting to say something else, to try and stop him and achieve what she wanted like she was always thought to do, but both were stopped when the doors of the dining room were opened, your body peaking through, your maiden following behind. âYour Majesty,â you were surprised, your voice steady and curious at the sight of your husband being with an unknown lady. Your eyes darted between the two of them, taking in the room's tense atmosphere.Â
âI apologize for the interruption, I wanted to get my dinner outside my room today. I didnât know we were having guests over.â You bow down lightly, making Jungkook soften at the sight. His rigid posture calming down, legs taking him closer to you in a habit. âY/N.â he said, his voice gentler now. âYou should be resting, my love.â You smile, fingers caressing the beautiful embroidery on his blazer, admiring how well built he is in comparison to you.
âIâve rested long enough. I canât spend the rest of my life locked up in that room. Iâve been feeling better since this new medicine.â
âI see,â he murmured, his lips falling into a faint smile. âDonât push yourself too hard, you still have a long time to recover.â Your tender moment, a sight for those around, was now being interrupted by the woman sitting across the room, envy in her eyes.Â
âSuch a heartwarming moment to witness.â She says clasping her hands together. âThough I must admit, I hadnât expected to see Your Grace today.â she added, directing her words toward you. âI figured since youâve been in such a delicate position, you would like to rest, not entangle yourself with administrative problems.â Your gaze met hers, you felt calm despite the stab hidden beneath her words. âI appreciate your concern,â you replied smoothly, detaching yourself from Jungkook. âBut I know my limits better than anyone.â you say while eyeing her. Jungkookâs hand grasps yours gently, making you look up at him giving a reassuring smile in response to his concern. Yujinâs smile falters ever so slightly seeing you stand with such confidence, but she quickly recovers, lightly chuckling.Â
âI hope I didnât upset Your Grace, these were not my intentions. I am a devoted woman when it comes to the good of the people.â She starts again, the same story of how good she wants to appear in front of you, wishing just a tiny part of her acts could tone you down.
âY/Nâs dedication has never been in question either.â Jungkook interrupts firmly, his voice steady. âShe is not only my queen but the heart of this kingdom, you should admire her for the efforts sheâs putting in.â
Yujin froze in place, taken aback by the sudden confession. âOf course,â she murmured, a flicker of frustration obvious in her gaze.
âYour Majesty is fortunate to have such a queen by his side.â She mumbles before bowing deeply to the both of you and making her way towards the exit, but not before leaving her last words to linger around. âIâd love for his Majesty to join my tour tomorrow, if possible. We have important matters to discussâ she said, pausing, her gaze briefly meeting Jungkookâs before she turned and disappeared through the doorway. The room was silent for a moment. You turned to Jungkook eyeing him, his expression unreadable. âJungkook, who was this lady?â You cut down formalities when met only with him.Â
For a moment he didnât answer, his mind and heart running wild, weighing whether to share more of whatâs happening with you or not, scared of your reaction towards whatâs happening. âDonât worry.â he said carefully, avoiding your glance. âSheâs just an acquaintanceâŠâ You could read him, you knew him for a long time, he was hiding stuff from you.
You exhale abruptly, turning your body away from the man. âIs this your way of protecting me? I could read through your lies every day, Jungkook! I know you better than anyone else.â You huff in annoyance, signaling your maiden. âI have no appetite anymore.â Your frustration was building up, you were tired of pretending everything was fine around you two. You could hear him follow behind you, trying to stop you in your steps. You didnât look back, you didnât stopâŠyou couldnât. Is distance and lies what has become of your relationship? Arriving at your door you send your maiden away, turning to finally seek the man. You could see the hurt in his eyes, the way he was trying to avoid your glance in shame for being caught. âIs this what I am to you?â You say, your heart racing in your chest. âI canât keep pretending everything is fine when you keep lying to me, hiding away stuff, avoiding me.â Jungkook opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. He swallowed hard, his doe eyes finally meeting your sad ones. âI am no longer the person you turn to, Jungkook. I can see this, I can feel this.â you pause for a second, trying so hard to gather the words that were scattering around your head.
âYou donât come anymore, you donât see me anymore, you donât want to touch me anymore. Is this the reason sheâs here? Are you trying to replace me?â You ask upset, tears burning in your eyes. âYou know this is not true! You are everything to me.â he says, his voice cracking, defending his actions. âEverything Iâm doing is for the kingdom, for us...â He takes a step closer, his hand reaching out for yours, but you pull away. âIs it?â You whispered, a single tear running down your cheek. For a moment, neither of you move, his silence was cutting you deep. Finally, he finally breaks, voice quieter now, almost pleading. "Please loveâŠI don't want to hurt you.â his hand finds his way up, the back of his fingers barely caressing your face. âBut you do, everyday! Do you even see me as your woman anymore?â your voice was trembling, a mix of frustration and pain in it.
"Y/N, you are still everything to me, you are my woman, my queen.â he was frustrated too, wanting to keep you safe and show you love, but being afraid of losing you. He wanted you to understand him too, how hard it is for him to stay away. âYou used to want me, you used to look at me like I was your world. Now I donât know who I am to you anymore!" You break down in rage and upset.
Jungkookâs chest tightened seeing how he only causes more pain then relief to your aching pains. His arms wrap around you so tight, finally giving in, the craves he has for you spilling. "I still want you. I always will" he says, his feelings raw. You look up at him, your teary eyes and pouty lips making him melt. âThen love me, I wonât break.â and thatâs all it takes.
He picks you from the ground, one hand opening then closing the door behind you. His lips find yours after so many days of being untouched, honey-like taste lingering around. You cry. The feelings of being close with your husband breaking every wall you build around yourself all these years. He lays you down between the mountain of pillows and blankets, his lips never breaking from yours. âI am afraid.â He says when you pull away for a fresh breath of air. âI donât want to lose you, but pushing you away kills me everyday.â He whispers letting his own fears alive, tears falling onto your neck. You raise your hand to reassure him, gently combing through his hair, shooting away his own hurt. âThen donât push me away anymore. I need you by my side and you do too.â You let him sob on your chest, finally grasping how hard everything has been for him. âI want to stay by your side, Jungkook. I wish to be the queen I was before. So pleaseâŠstop throwing me into the shadows.â His arms tighten around you. âIâm sorry.â he chokes out, his voice muffled against you âI want to be better at this, but I feel like I have no one. Everyone wants something from me and I feelâŠso aloneâŠâ He finally confesses, showing all of his emotions.Â
âIâll do better, Y/N. I promise.â he looks up and you cup his cheek, your thumb wiping away his tears. âI am not much of a support, but donât hide away from me. I am not as weak as people make me to be.â
His brows furrow, guilt flickering across his face knowing he lets you think youâre weak, you being the strongest person heâs met. âYouâre not weak.â he whispers. âYou never were.â, âYou will never be.â He kisses you gently once again, his salty lips burning against yours before pulling away to rest his forehead on yours. âLetâs take it easy from now. Iâll trust you and you trust me. No more running awayâ his breath feels warm against your face. âIâll sleep with you today, itâs been long since we spent time together.â He takes off his clothes, remaining only in his white shirt and pants and rests down next to you, arms wrapping around your figure from behind.Â
You could feel it for the first time since forever, the feeling of reassurance, the walls youâve built along the years beginning to rebuild. You lean deeper into his touch without the care for the future, feeling in the moment like you could conquer the world together.
------------------------------
The next day, the palace was too full of life. The maids and servants were going crazy trying to find the king. A problem has arised, a big one. The doors of your bedroom flew open with a loud bang, startling the both of you, making Jungkook almost fall from the bed. Your maiden, Seol gasping in shock and embarrassment seeing the both of you entangled between the sheets.Â
âY-your Grace! Oh my, I apologize for intruding in such a way. I-I didnât know you and my Lady.â Her head quickly lowered in shame of witnessing such a scene. You hid under your blanket trying to suppress your laughter. Jungkook ran a hand through his messy hair, letting out a sigh, he was a little irritated by the disturbance. âSeol. Whatâs the meaning of all this?âÂ
The girl gulped, bowing deeply âForgive me, Your Grace! The elder queen is here, sheâs demanding to talk to you.â Your heart sank at the mention of the elder queen, she was never fond of you and you knew from way before how harsh she is with Jungkook, trying to keep him under her strong control. You glanced at Jungkook, who was already frowning. âWhat is it now?â Jungkook muttered under his breath before getting out of bed, making Seol shriek and turn away blushing in embarrassment. âI will go and see what this is about.â He puts on his blazer and shoes and exits the room leaving you and your flustered maiden behind. You sit up and look at the girl, concern running through your veins. âSeol, what is this about? Why is Jungkookâs mother here again?â You heard from around the palace a thing or two, having a close bond with your maiden has always proven efficient in letting you be in touch with what was happening around.
Seol hesitates, wringing her hands nervously. âMy lady, IâŠI donât think I shouldâŠâ You huff in annoyance with her trying to keep the secret. âYou should, we donât keep secrets around here. Why is she here?â You ask for answers in a more demanding tone. She lowers her voice, glancing toward the door as if afraid someone might overhear, before finally breaking the news to you. âThe elder queen⊠sheâs growing impatient. Sheâs been making arrangements, calling for meetings with the king behind closed doors.â
âArrangements? For what?â you press on, wanting a proper answer. âFrom what I know itâs exclusive between her, the king and his adviser. I tried to get more info, but Iâll be beheaded if they find me sneaking around!â âWhy didnât Jungkook tell me⊠Is this all you know?â you ask, eagerly expecting. Seol bites her lip before coming even closer to you. âThat lady, sheâs also here.â She whispers, making your heart skip a beat.
âThe girl from yesterday? The one that had dinner with my husband?â You ask stunned and Seol nods, her expression filled with unease. âYes, my lady. Sheâs in the garden with the elder queen now. They are waiting for the king to be there, I feel like something is going to happen.â You sigh and raise from the bed. âThis only sounds like trouble. Prepare my dress, Iâm going to see whatâs happening there.â âMy lady, I think you should not!â Seol tries to stop, but you turn and look at her with angry eyes. She can only comply under your authority, you are the queen and she canât tell you want to do. With shame she bows her head and starts to help you dress.
âDonât push yourself too hard, my lady...â she says worried before following you to the garden.
âŠ
Slowly you see it. The garden doors come into view making you take a deep breath in nervousness. You could hear their voices and you could definitely see a stressed Jungkook through the glass window.
âI told you to cut it down, this is not happening! Why canât you understand!â Heâs trying to keep his composure, he was angry for some reason unknown to you.
âBring that damned girl here! Itâs not your decision to make, she has to give her word! What king are you, ever since two years ago this place has been running wild!â
Beside him sits the elder queen, her presence commanding and cold, and next to her the girl you saw before, a sly smile tugging at her lips.
You open the doors making them stop, all eyes being on you. âForgive my intrusion.â you say, your voice calm but firm. âBut I believe I should also be present to whatever is happening here.â
Jungkookâs eyes widened in surprise and fear seeing you. The elder queen scoffs, leaning back in her seat when she sees you enter. âDo you realize how long the kingdom has waited for you?â Her eyes were piercing, punching holes through your body.
âItâs been long since weâve seen each other, Y/N. I think itâs time we discuss a little about the future of this land.â You met her icy gaze, the way she spoke without a care. âYouâre right, mother.â you replied, taking a deep breath. âItâs been a long time since weâve spoken, why donât we catch up?âÂ
The elder queenâs eyes narrow. âYou know what this is about?â You look a little confused, but before anything could be said Jungkook moves to your side abruptly, not wanting you there any further.
âThis discussion is over.â He says, glaring at his mother, trying to assess dominance in front of the woman who brought him to this earth. âYou think this discussion is over?â she asks unamused, rising from her seat. âThis has to be discussed, Jungkook. Weâve waited long enough.â Jungkook clenches his jaw trying to pull you away from all the madness.Â
âAre you with child?â She asks carelessly, stunning you at her sudden boldness. âExcuse me?â You could feel your chest tighten at her words, eyes widening in disbelief. âAre you with child?â The elder queen repeats, her tone impatient. You remain frozen, mind scrambling for a response.
âHow could I be?â you respond, voice trembling slightly. "The kingdom needs an heir. You and Jungkook have been married long enough, where is the future descendant of this kingdom?â she adds nonchalantly.
Jungkook steps forward trying to shield you away from his motherâs harsh words. âIt is not for you to decide when we should bear children, mother.â he says, making the queen chuckle. âSheâs sick. How could she even bear children?â her words venomous, filled with disgust.
You felt the world spinning around you. What was all of this about? The future of the kingdom, an heir? Your heart starts to quicken as the words sink in. âY/N, youâve done enough till now, I respect the work youâve done for the good of the land. But we need someone to rule further.â His mother says, coming closer to you, her hand trying to grasp yours only to be stopped by Jungkook.
âThe people are growing restless. If you cannot fulfill your duty as the queen, then we must take other measures, my dear.â she says, ignoring her sonâs desperate actions in trying to stop her from reaching further to you.Â
You wanted to argue with her, to defend yourself, but all your words were stuck in your throat. âJungkook is still young, he can still provide children. All that I ask of you is to accept a small change in your life.â
She pulls you closer holding both of your hands in her. âLady Yujin here is a nice girl. She is young and able to bear the child everybody wishes upon.â Your eyes widen, finally catching on her sick plan. You pulled your hands back slowly, taking a step back. âNo.â you respond, shaking your head, body trembling with unknown emotions, trying to take in what was suddenly coming your way in rapid motion.Â
âAll that I ask is for you to agree on their marriage. She will bear an heir for the throne and then itâs your and Jungkookâs choice on whatâs going to happen further, I wonât bother anymore.â She was calm in her words, a heartless woman hiding behind her facade. Your eyes begin to fill with tears. âNoâ you say once again shaking your head in denial. You turn your head to look at your husband, wondering about the emotions he holds in his eyes. âJungkookâŠis this what you want?â You ask, defeated. Hoping for him to not be on the other side. He comes closer to you holding your arms, looking deeply into your eyes in desperation. âNo, of course not!â Raw guilt was taking over him, he couldnât find the words to reassure you, to explain that this wasnât the choice he wanted to take.
You glanced at her, the woman who was meant to replace you, seeing her smile in victory made your stomach twist and turn. âIâm only here to help, Your Majesty. Iâm sure we can come to an agreement that benefits everyone.â she says swiftly, eyes glinting with satisfaction. You could barely look at Jungkook now, the man you thought was your everything, the man you trusted above all. âYouâre all so quick to tear me apart.â You say ripping yourself from his embrace.
âBut it's your role as the kingâŠâ you say unsure, mixed feelings were creeping inside, his motherâs manipulation getting to you.
You bite your lip thinking about the situation. You know the harsh words of your people, the whispers, the stares. Your situation is uncertain and just for a split second your judgment is clouded.Â
The persuasion of Jungkookâs mother, the suffocating stares of Yujin, Jungkookâs guilty eyes. You caved in, giving up your principles for the better of the kingdom, like any other queen would. You try to remain calm and think, but maybe you were not as strong as you thought. In a blink you cough, gasping for air. Jungkook rushes to your side before you manage to collide with the hard concrete, his arms wrapping around your frail frame. âCall the doctor!â he shouted, his voice frantic.Â
"My loveâŠ" his voice trembling as he gently held you close to his beating heart. You could hear his voice, see the way he started to scream at his mom for making you go through this, his tears falling on your face, staining your cheeks.
Your ears were ringing louder and louder and looking at his worried face, your vision starting to blur until you could not hear or feel anything anymore.Â
A deep slumber engulfing you.
-----------------------------------
Itâs been 2 months since the incident has occurred. Ever since youâve been on bed rest. The medicine you were taking was experimental since there was no known cure for what you had, it was to assume that side effects would appear sooner or later and after the shock you suffered, you decided to stay enclosed.
You received the news in your bed, in the end your husband succumbed to his mothers urgings, now married out of will to a second woman, the one whoâs seen to bring peace and stability to the kingdom. A new hope.
Yujin quickly became loved by the people, showing up along with your husband to all the events you shouldâve attended, stepping up on the duties you should care for.
She made the people feel safe again, making them forget the real queen they have, turning their back to you, wishing Yujin would take your spot forever. However, these were only what the outside could see, inside the palace was a nightmare. She was a vile woman, a two faced snake. After she got the taste of power she started showing her rotten self.
Nobody dared to speak in front of her, let alone oppose to any of her sayings. But with all the power she holds right now, sheâs missing something she dearly desires, the key to your husbandâs heart. Jungkook refused.Â
He refused anything that has to do with her, to eat with her, hear her, see her, and clearly he refused to consummate his âmarriageâ making her rot in envy every time he came to spend time in your chamber.
He stayed by your side now, day by day, night by night. Lulling you to sleep when the pain was too much to bear, singing to you through the day if you felt upset or too sick. He showed you that no matter how many ups and downs he has, youâre still his number one priority. The person he deeply adored. You felt at peace now, Yujinâs arrival did not bring as much chaos as you thought, it only made your and Jungkookâs relationship grow stronger, blooming after years of being caged. She wanted him so much it made him run far away from her, deeper and deeper into your arms. It was evening right now, you were sitting in your bed like usual, feeling much better these days. Seol was sitting behind you, gently combing your hair, preparing you for your bath. âYou look so pretty, my queen.â she murmurs.Â
âThank you, Seol,â you replied, gazing at your reflection in the window. âYouâve been glowing recently, I could see youâre getting better.â she chuckles softly, admiring you. âThe medicine has been working so far, the doctor said itâs a promising solution.â Seol hums unconvinced with your excuses. âAre you sure thatâs the reason, my lady? Your Grace has been visiting a lot lately, hasnât he?â she says, her tone a little teasing.
âHe really has, hasnât he? I was afraid she would steal him away, but it seems he carries no interest.â You felt a small sense of gratitude towards the two of them, the ones who stood beside you no matter what.
âIâve heard Lady Yujin created a monstrous scandal just the other day. The king still not bedded with her, right?â you scoff at her boldness, since when did she become like this? âA little bold of you to ask your queen such things.â you say crossing your arms, trying to appear upset just to mess with her a little.
She gasps and stops her actions, coming to her senses about what came out of her mouth. âI-Iâm so sorry! I shouldâve never stepped this far! Itâs not my business on what's happening in the kingâs life, Iâm so sorry!â She bows down, ashamed, making you burst into laughter, achieving with glory your goals. âI was just joking, I consider you my best friend Seol! Donât be so rough around me, we already speak of all.â You tease back. âAnd to answer your question. No, he hasnât. I think he never will.â You smile proudly, showing off your loyal husband before the reality starts to kick in again.
âBut this doesnât mean heâs doing it with me either. Itâs been more than a year since weâve been intimate with each other.â you sigh sadly, resting your head on your palm.
Seol looks up at you, her eyes soft with concern. âMy lady, donât let the distance get to you. Youâve both been through so much already, he must be afraid." she reasures you kindly. âAfraid of what exactly?â You both stop in your tracks, blush creeping up when Jungkook enters the room, confusion obvious on his face.
âJungkook...â you start trying to collect your words but failing. Seol is quick to excuse herself and leave the room, but you have nowhere to go so you face the man.Â
âIâm sorry for interrupting you two. But, Y/N...what is this about me being afraid of?â he comes closer to you, wondering what were you scheming behind his back. âWe were having a one on one girl talk, clearly not your business.â You pout crossing your arms. He smiles briefly. âHmm, Iâll let it slide this time, only because it was a girl talk.â He pats your head coming closer to leave a peck on your lips. âI see Seol prepared you for a bath, should I help you with it since sheâs not here anymore?â he questions, making the air around you grow thick. Your heart skips a beat, he hasnât seen you naked in a while, why now all of a sudden?Â
âYou donât have to do that, I can manage myself!â You rush to say, feeling shy in front of him all. âWhat if I want to?â He teases, eyes shining with love when looking at you. And you shyly comply thinking it might be for the best to have him around, fastly getting your necessities and heading for the bath with your husband behind you.
Once you enter you slowly let the night gown fall to the floor, back facing the man. You take off your undergarments as well, a blush creeping on your cheek knowing heâs watching you undress, wondering what he thinks of you right now, seeing you so exposed in front of him.
âIâm shy.â you whisper. âWhy? Iâve seen you before.â Heâs quick to add without shame, a shiver coming up your spine at his seductive tone.
He comes from behind holding your hand, helping you hop into the bath, warm water engulfing your body. You look away for a second, hiding your breast with your hands, but quickly turning around when you hear the rustling of clothes echoing through the enclosed space.
Heâs getting undressed. Jungkook watches you carefully, seeing your eyes preying on his body. âLike what you see?â He asks, amused. You lock eyes with him for a second before turning back around, hiding your red face from him.
âYouâre a pervert.â He could hear you mumble. âYouâre the one acting worse than on our first night together.â he responds, making you huff. âWhatâs gotten into you, itâs been long since we were this closeâŠâ
He tilts his head a little hurt by your words. âI know itâs been long, but do you not want me to be here?â you feel the guilt creep in, you should be grateful. He's trying to be close to you again and instead of letting him in your heart again you say rude words making him question his decisions. âI didnât mean it like that.â you quickly clarify. âItâs just⊠itâs been so long since we were close like this. I wasnât expecting you to be so⊠forward with it.â you finally admit. You look at him, his eyes are softly looking back at you. He doesnât say much, only signaling you to make some space for his body to fit behind. You sit in silence, your body tense, hugging your knees close to your chest. Jungkook is spread behind you, his arms on each side of the tub, eyes closed. âRelax a little, will you? I wonât eat you.â you donât trust his words, heâs scheming something. One of his arms comes closer to you, resting at the base of your neck, pulling you to lay your back on his chest. âI shouldâve done this sooner. I missed being close to you.â He lets out a satisfied sigh, hands wrapping around your front, resting on your waist.Â
Jungkook gently nuzzles his face into the back of your neck, his breath warm against your skin. âI want you.â He says, making goosebumps erupt on the surface of your skin.
âDo you think we can?â He reluctantly asks, a sniff of persuasion hiding behind. You were melting into his touch, his hand trailing down slowly, caressing your closed thighs. âCan you? Hmm, love?â Your breath starts to hitch, the water feeling colder than your body temperature. You slowly open your legs, letting his hand touch your privates, opening a way for him. His fingers gently caress through your folds while his lips start to leave kisses on the back of your neck.
You gulp when his thumb comes in contact with your little bundle of nerves, a faint whimper leaving your lips. His other hand starts to cup one of your breasts, playing gently with it.
It's easy to say you were in a bliss, nothing youâve felt before was making you feel as good as what the man you love was doing right now. You didnât want to stop, falling deeper into the haze. But just when everything starts to feel much sweeter, you hear a knock on your door, freezing you in place, making Jungkookâs finger stop right at your entrance, leaving you unsatisfied.
You whine loudly, hands covering your face in desperation. From the other side of the door you hear Seolâs voice asking for you, making you startle in fear. âSeol, stay outside!â you shout horrified that she might enter the room.
âAre you okay, my Lady? Why did you bathe alone, what if something wouldâve happened?â She's always the one to accompany you when you bathe, just to make sure you wonât have any accidents. But now, Jungkook was here, it would be improper for her to walk on you two, especially during such lewd actions.
âDonât worry, Seol, Iâm with her.â Jungkook responds, annoyed himself, at the fact that he had to stop after managing so much persuasion.
Seol only rushes to get her words out once she finds out you two were bathing together, you could imagine her face being so red by the embarrassment.
âI w-will leave her in your care, your Majesty! I didnât know, Iâm so sorry! Oh heavens, I always come in at the wrong time!â her last phrase was probably for herself.Â
âSeol, before you leave. I have a favor to ask. Tell the guards around to not come close to her royaltyâs chamber tonight. Donât disturb us until I come out and say so, understood?â You blush at his words, wondering what was going on in his mind. Seol on the other hand is even more flustered, catching what the king is about to do on first hearing. She excuses herself and leaves. Between you two is silence. You looked at him from over your shoulder, he was staring at you, half lidded, licking his lips when your eyes met. âI think we should get out right now.â He rises from the water, stepping outside of the tub, grabbing a towel to wrap around his waist in hurry. You look confused at him, you didnât even wash properly. âBut, we havenât even washedâŠâ Jungkook lends you his hand and you take it. He wraps another towel around you, showing you the way back to your room. âWe will need to bathe later on anyway.â He says before gently laying you down on your bed. He gets rid of the towel, letting it pool at his feet, and then you see it. Standing proud and heavy, in all of its glory in front of you. Now you understand.Â
He wants you in that way.
You blush, but hands work fast like a reflex, dragging the towel off of you, letting you naked in front of him as well. He comes closer, kneeling on your bed, above you. You raise your hands to touch his chest, fingers trailing down, but stopping right above his hardened member. âDonât be a tease now.â he grunts. You smile, letting your hands gently grasp him, stroking him up and down, giving him what he wants. Jungkook looks at you from above and whimpers, you look so beautiful under him, stroking his cock up and down like the goddess you are, working him up like never before. âHow should I serve you next, my king? Do you want my mouth?â You ask seductively. He smiles, dirty thoughts of you doing what he wants flooding his mind. He has to be tame though, your state is still not stable, he promised to take it easy. âItâs fine, how about I work you up a little instead? We want this to last without getting you too tired.â You let go of him, happiness feeling your veins knowing you have such a caring man beside you.
He leans down to land a kiss between your breasts, his hands finding their way back to where they were earlier. One of his fingers entering you eagerly, breaking a gasp and a loud moan from such unexpected intruding.
He comes back up, pushing a second one in, followed by a third. You were a moaning mess, trying to keep composure in front of him, but when his lips latch on your sweet spot you lose it, all the strings breaking in your body making you come undone under his touch.
âThat was fast my love, was I too eager for you?â He is breathless as well, his cheeks and chest flushed with a red color. âItâs been long, Iâm not used to the feeling anymore.â you barely manage to rip out.
He chuckles, taking his fingers out. âThatâs funny, you took three of my fingers like they were nothing.â You whine at his teasing, body heating up quickly. He leans back, still on his knees looking at you from above.
âLook at all the mess you made.â you canât manage to respond anymore since his hands grab your legs, spreading them nice for him to see. âI guess we should make even more now that weâre at it, donât you think?â âYeah, I would love that.â You say, biting your lower lip seductively, enticing him even more. âYouâre the real definition of a pillow princess.â He looks at your body, beautifully spread beneath him, hair messy and all over the pillows in your bed, cheeks flustered and shiny arousal pooling between your legs. âTell me to stop if itâs too much.â He says grabbing his member, aligning it to your entrance. âDonât we need protection?â You suddenly ask, not wanting to break the mood, but also trying to be careful about your actions. He hums a little, slapping the head of his thick cock on your wetness before nudging your entrance with it. âLetâs not tonight.â He says before pushing in slowly, breaking a loud moan from you before bottoming out in one go. âJungkook!â You scream, not in pain, but in so much pleasure you could already come again. Feeling him inside you, so raw, so real, clouding your mind breaking any rational thought you have left. Between you was a desire you never felt, a passion that took years to build up only to spill all over in this moment. His touch felt nauseating, his lips burned your skin with pure emotions, the stretching of his cock pushing through your walls just the right way.
You were on cloud nine, if not even further, lost somewhere in the universe, never wanting to return from such heights this man continued to rip out of you. You were loud, so loud you thought for a second the whole empire could hear you, could hear the way he claimed his only love, his only wife, his only queen.
Jungkook was lost too, his mind filled with the thought of you, the erotic images of your actions imprinting deep within his conscience, craving more of you.Â
He also wanted to let everyone know, to know he was the only one he could make you feel this way and you were the only one who he would go unbelievable lengths to satisfy.
He didnât want to be afraid anymore, you would have him by his side for the rest of your life long or short, and after that he would not be this close with anyone ever again. You were close once again, this time he was too. You canât even remember how many times you were at breaking point tonight, coming undone under him and his intoxicating touch.
 âJungkook, Iâm so close, donât stop.â you pant trying to regain your breath. The boy does not stop, pleasing you, keeping his peace, feeling his climax coming just as close.
In bliss you both moan loudly, coming together. His breath rages, sweat dripping from his forehead onto your chest. He kisses you once again, making sure youâre safe and alright in his arms.
And then, when you both regain a bit of composure you go again, over and over, loving each other all night long until both of you canât take it anymore. Just him making sure you feel all the love youâve been missing for the past two years.
âŠ
On the other side of the castle, news flow rapidly, arriving in the end at the ears of the other âqueenâ.
âDoes he think Iâm a fool?!â she hisses, her voice harsh. Her maiden bows in respect for her. âWhere have you heard such news anyways?â she asks, looking at her reflection in the vanity mirror. âMy lady, the queenâs maiden has come out rushing and telling everybody not to come close to her chamber.â âShe told everyone to stay away from her chamber?â she questions, her voice low and dangerous. Her maiden nodes hesitantly. âYes, my lady. They say His Majesty is inside with her... and has been for hours now.â
Yujinâs anger was boiling over. Itâs been two months since their wedding officiated, and ever since he had refused her presence entirely. She felt insulted, the thought of the king being intimate with the other woman and not with her was driving her crazy.
âOf course, heâs with her.â she spat. âI was promised a place here to bear an heir, yet heâs still clinging to that pathetic excuse of a woman!â Her maiden kept her gaze down, her hands trembling slightly as she fondled with the hem of her dress.
âHow long would he keep going on with this? He finally sees her now?â âMy lady.â the maiden whispers with a quivering voice. âPerhaps, if you showed patience, His Majesty mightâŠâ Yujin cut her off. âPatience? Does he think Iâll simply stand by and watch while he engages with her?â she was enraged by the thought. âOr perhaps the king is only showing pity.â The maiden tries to reassure only to be met with more explosive feelings.Â
âDo you think pity is what drives a man to spend hours behind locked doors? Forgetting who he should sleep with in order to get that damned heir? â She scoffed bitterly, rising from her chair. The girl lowers her head further, wishing she could disappear. âI-I only meant that His Majesty might be torn, my lady. The queen has been with him for so long and heâs been neglecting her.âÂ
âSheâs weak!â Yujin snapped. âNothing but a disgusting living corpse! How could he engage with her?!â she says while placing through her room. âPerhaps...it is not about what she gives him, but what she means to him.â the maiden suggests.
Yujin freezes mid-step, her eyes narrowing as she turns to face the girl, coming dangerously close to her. She was blinded by the goals she has to achieve, madness driving into her.
âAre you suggesting that she is somehowâŠirreplaceable?âÂ
âN-no, my lady!â The girl stammered. âI only think that since theyâve been together for long, their bond might be hard to break.âÂ
âSilence!â The woman shouts out, sharp and commanding, making the poor girl shiver. âHe must come to his senses. This kingdom needs me, only me!â she turns around looking at her reflection through the mirror. âIâve had enough of this waiting. If His Majesty wonât act, then I will.â Yujin says, lips curled into a sinister smile.
âWhat will you do, my lady?â the maiden asks cautiously. âIâll just remind Jungkook that this kingdomâs future depends on me, not on a woman who canât even stand on her own two feet let alone bear his children.â
âMark my words,â she said softly, almost to herself. âBefore long, Iâll be the only queen this kingdom knows.â
---------------------------------
Morning came by fast, the rays of sun burning on your cheek. You whine trying to move only to find yourself trapped under a muscular body. Your eyes flutter open to find Jungkook sprawled on top of you, sleeping soundly.Â
You brush your hand through his hair, taking in the sight of him being so calm. It felt surreal, as if the weight of the world outside this room didnât exist, the only place being in the warmth of his arms. âGood morning,â you murmured, seeing him stir in his sleep. âMorning, love,â he whispered, his voice deep and husky. You tried to wiggle out from under him, but he only held you tighter. âWhere do you think youâre going?â he teased, nuzzling into your neck. âLetâs just stay a little longer like this.â his voice still laced with sleep. The room quiets down, you close your eyes, enjoying Jungkook's presence just a little more. âLast night...â he began, his tone teasing. âIt was the best sleep Iâve had in years.â His smile was cocky. âAnd not just because of the other things we did.â You have blush creeping up your neck as you avoided his gaze.Â
âItâs because for the first time, I felt like I had you back. Like nothing else around mattered.â he said looking at you with such sincerity in his eyes.Â
âWell.â you started, âMaybe weâll have more nights like this.â you say shyly, still avoiding his gaze. He grins as he pulls your naked bodies closer together. âCareful what you promise, my queen,â he teased. âI might hold you to it.â Both of you smile as you melt away into one another. You stayed in his arms all morning, until he was ready to get back to his duties.Â
âŠ
Jungkook made his way down the halls of the palace after working hard all day. He had in mind one thing, to get some comfortable clothes and come around to see what his sweet wife was doing.
But as he approached his chambers, he noticed the door was slightly open. Without thinking much, he pushes through the door, expecting his adviser or some maid to be in it. To his surprise, on his bed was seated Yujin. Jungkook froze for a moment wondering who allowed her to enter his room. âWhat are you doing here?â His tone was sharp while talking to her, devoid of any emotion.
âI came to talk,â she said simply, her eyes burning holes in the man. âYou should leave, Yujin. I have nothing to say to you.â His words were cold. The girl rises from his bed, coming closer to him, her eyes locking with his.Â
âYouâve refused me for months, my Grace. Is this your way of bringing good to the people?â she continued, her voice tainted with frustration. By this time his patience was running low as well, tired of having to deal with her.
âWhat do you expect exactly?â Jungkook asks, folding his arms. âOne night. Give yourself to me for one night and thatâs all.â she whispers seductively, hands caressing his arms.
âI thought I made myself clear already. I want nothing to do with you.â he pushes her aside, resuming his task, his body craving something else, someone else.Â
âYouâre lying to yourself.â she murmured, grabbing his sleeve. âYou can pretend all you want, but I know what you need. And right now, itâs not her. I could give you something she canât, a bliss you never felt.â She persuades, making the man clench his jaw in annoyance.Â
"Leave." he commanded, his voice controlled, cold as ice. âHave you really bedded with her?â she asks all of a sudden, not wanting to believe the rumors that were going around. âYou donât get to question me about what I do.â he hisses back. âI didnât want to believe it at first, but Iâve heard you spent the whole night in her chamber.â Her words were bitter, she didnât want to accept it. âYujin!âÂ
Jungkook shouts, startling her. âYou do not get to question what I do, especially with my wife!â âI am also your wife! Why are you playing only on one side, Jungkook!â He raises his hand, making her flinch. He felt pity bubble in the bottom of his stomach at that moment, he took a deep breath tone lowering even deeper if possible.Â
âI will tell you this, once. Only Y/N can call me Jungkook. You neverâŠnever, dare to use my name again!.â His hand combs through his hair in frustration. âSecond, I do not want to see you around again, I told you I have no interest in being involved with you. The only woman that I want is Y/N, she is your queen.âÂ
Yujin stood frozen, her fists clenched at her sides as Jungkookâs words pierced through her like daggers, a mixture of disbelief and anger blooming into her, but she couldnât fight back. She pushed his limits way too far already, even though the two were married she could still be punished for coming against the king.Â
She bit down her bottom lip bowing to him then leaving his chamber, tears spilling in anger. Her mind was already thinking of what steps she needs to take next in order for him to fall in her trap and ensure her duty is accomplished.
She entered her room, throwing her stuff on the floor in rage, the commotion making her maiden, Byeol, come to see whatâs going on. Her eyes widened in concern seeing the state of her lady.Â
Yujin took a deep breath, trying to steady herself. "Heâs chosen her." she hissed through clenched teeth, "I will make him regret this. I will show him Iâm the better one to stay by his side!â her breath was ragged, trying desperately to keep composure. Yujin faces Byeol, her eyes darkening, an evil plan scheming in her mind. âBring me the royal doctor.â she says, her voice cold and determined, making the maiden shiver in fear. âI have a plan thatâs going to end all this havoc for good.â
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For the next few days neither of you were bothered by Yujin, which makes you feel uneasy, wondering if sheâs really given up or not. Jungkook, however, we could say his mood has been lighter without having her on his back all the time. He was preparing for something else anyway. Your 5th wedding anniversary. The palace hasnât held the annual banquet for this celebration since youâve fallen ill, but this year, with your approval, he decided to enlighten the people and show them that you are fastly recovering, coming even stronger than before. The palace buzzed with activity as preparations for the grand banquet began, heâs gotten busy enough through the day, but he managed to always join your side at night.
The servants hurried through the halls, carrying colorful dresses and fragrant flowers. Everyone was looking forward to such a night. In your room the atmosphere was even more chaotic, this being the 10th dress you tried on only to discard it with upset. âThis is not it!â you huff making Seol lose her mind, the dresses supplies becoming limited. âMy queen, please decide upon one. We have no more left!â she says, making you let out a frustrated sigh. âItâs not about the dress anymore.â you mumble, throwing yourself on your bed. You wanted to look good tonight, to impress all the guests and mostly your husband.
You growl a soft knock interrupting your sulking. But before you could respond, Jungkook steps in âAm I interrupting?â he asks, leaning casually against the doorframe.
âNoâŠIâm just trying to find the right dress.â you replied disappointed, eyes staring at the ceiling above. âNo luck until now? Iâve sent you loads of dresses.â you whine rolling on your tummy, looking outside the window. âSheâs been trying for three hours already and no luck.â Seol stays exhausted.
âY/N, my love.â he coos sitting next to you, patting your back gently. âYou know you could be dressed in a potato sack and I will still think you are the most beautiful woman Iâve ever laid eyes upon?â he says while you pull slightly at your hair in desperation.
âI just want everything to be perfect.â you sadly whimper, making him chuckle. âHow about this one then?â He picks the last dress from the stall. A beautiful and pretty simple white gown.
âI think you will look like an angel in this one. Want to try it on for me?â he asks, raising a brow.
âWonât this make me look like a bride?â you question and he smiles. âI think this will be a good reference, my beautiful bride.â you laugh and grab the dress. âIâll try it on then.â
Seol helps you in it, tying the corset and putting a frame under it to puff it up a little. You look in the mirror, the dress was indeed beautiful, soft fabric flowing gently down your body, it made you seem so pure, so alive.Â
Jungkook slowly steps behind you, his hands resting gently on your waist. âThere she is, my beautiful wife.â he says, his eyes never leaving yours in the mirrorâs reflection, looking at you with true adoration. âThank you.â you say, turning to him, his lips pecking yours slowly. âI should let you get ready, the banquet is close to starting.â satisfied the man leaves your room leaving you to resume your preparation. As the time drew near, you also grew more nervous. Finding yourself in front of the door almost made you turn around. âDonât be nervous!â Seol urged, pushing some courage towards you. âThis is your night.â she puts her hand over yours before arranging the last piece of your outfit, something that has been missing from your head for a long time, a crown.
You took a deep breath and entered the room, the grand hall quieting when they saw you at the top of the stairs. You look down, spotting many familiar figures, the one of your husbandâs catching your eyes, taking your breath away. Jungkook was waiting for you at the bottom of the stairs, his hand reaching for you to take it. The soft sound of your heels against the marble floor take over the room, whispers erupting around. When you reach him, he takes your hand, pressing a kiss on your ring finger before turning to address the crowd. âThe queen has arrived!â A wave of applause and cheers fill the room, people enchanting âAll hail the queen!â making you tear up in surprise, grateful to see you were not well forgotten. You could see genuine smiles on many faces, their respect and affection for you evident. âShall we open the banquet with a dance? What do you think?â Jungkook leads you to the center of the room, your beauty shining brighter in the dim lights. The music starts and you let yourself get carried away by your husbandâs lead. More and more people joining along. It felt magical, something so memorable you could remember it for years. You chatted away all night, catching up with important nobles, everyone showed so much love towards youâŠwell, almost everyone. In the corner of the room, a black dress decorated with many precious stones and expensive jewelry prepared for a big showoff, a glass of blood like wine in her hand. Yujin.
Her fingers tighten around the glass, eyes burning on you, seeing you so full of life all of a sudden. She was surrounded by a few nobles who attempted to be polite with her but only managed to get on her nerves.Â
âShe looks radiant, doesnât she?â one of the women remarked, glancing at you speaking with the crowd. âYes.â Yujin replied through gritted teeth, her gaze unwavering. âRadiant indeed.â
Byeol was sitting right behind, her fingers playing nervously with the bottle in her pocket. âMy lady, your planâŠâ she leans in to whisper.
âNot yet,â Yujin muttered, her voice low and calculated. âLet her enjoy it a little more, it will be her last moment after all.â she adds, her actions dangerous. The evening carried on beautifully, the grand hall brimming with music, laughter, and conversation. You felt alive again, dearly missing such events in your now dull life. Jungkook remained by your side as you engaged with the guests, from time to time asking about your condition only to hear youâve never felt as alive as now. He smiled looking down at you, his heart at peace knowing you were shining again, soon the servants started to bring more glasses into the room, people holding toasts in your honor. The servant stopped near you and Jungkook, offering the drinks. He took one, raising it slightly toward you. âTo usâ he whispered, his eyes sparkling with affection. You smiled, reaching for your own, but before you can grasp it the sound of broken glass startles you. Red liquid spilling at your feet, the bottom of your dress staining in it, shiny shards flickering into the bright fluid. âOh! My lord!â You hear the commotion, at the bottom of your feet collapsed Yujin, her hand trembling as red wine mixed with the crimson of her blood. "My lordâŠ" she gasps, vividly scared. âThe glassâŠit broke."
You looked down at her, wondering what to do. The room was tense, the whispers of the guests growing louder. âThe poor woman.â someone murmured. âWhy isnât the king helping her?â.
âYouâre bleeding.â he sys, his voice calm but distant, barely reaching out to her. She starts to cry, sobbing in fear, putting on a show for everyone to see, her maiden pacing worriedly around.Â
âYou should call the doctor, take her to her room, My Lord, sheâs bleeding out!â she says in panic. Jungkook looks at you for a second, searching for your reaction, before he helps her back on her feet, his clothes staining with blood.Â
âJungkook.â you say softly, placing a hand on his arm. âIâll be back, Iâm taking her to her chamber.â he lets out a breath, his expression unreadable.
âPlease, forgive me.â Yujin whimpers, her voice frail. âI didnât mean to disturb your celebration.â she says towards you before leaving along with your husband, a glint of evil lying under her fake facade, her hidden grin making a shiver run down your spine.
You look at them as they leave the grand hall, the murmurs growing louder, leaving you exposed under the glares of the crowd. Seol steps closer, her hand brushing your arm gently trying to reassure that everything was going to be alright, but you were not at peace, heath hammering in your chest with a bad feeling.
You stayed calm on the outside, telling people to enjoy what was left of the night, every now and then looking towards the big doors, waiting for your husbandâs return not knowing it will be all in vain.
He didnât return.
You wanted to leave, to go and search for him, but you had a party to lead now so instead, you sent Seol to look after him, hoping something bad didnât happen. Â After a couple more hours of agonizing wait you said goodbye to the last guests, the banquet finishing earlier under the worry of your sickness. You left in a rush, looking for Seol, she was nowhere to be found either.
You get back to your chamber, rushing panic flowing into your veins. Should you go search for him some more, perhaps visit his chamber? You gulp, hand cupping your throbbing heart, fear creeping through the cracks of your body.
You jump on your feet when you see the door of your room peaking open, someone falling at the step, a hand showing through the open crack. You rush towards them, opening widely just to be met with a horrifying sight. âJungkook!â you scream, leaning down to grab the man by the arm, the high temperature of his body hitting you in an instant. He looks up at you, sweat dripping down his forehead, breath raging wild. His eyes were half lidded, barely gazing at you through his lashes. âDo not believe itâŠI didnât do anythingâŠâ these were the only words he could say, it was like he is in a trance only chanting for you not to believe. You look outside, hoping to see someone, something, the hall was empty. You drag his body inside, taking in more of his ravished look. His shirt was fully unbuttoned chest on full display, so were his pants, his underwear peeking through the gap in the front. He was bright red and breaking in a sweat. For a second you wondered if heâs gotten sick from something, but when he laid down on your bed you could see his raging bulge trying to break free. You didnât know what to do or say, what happened in the time he was missing? Why was he in such state? You look back for a second, biting your lip, you should go and ask for the doctor. But when you try to take your first step, his hand drags you down, making you fall on top of him.
âHelp me.â he whispers. âIt hurtsâŠâ you look apologetical at him, your feelings running wild with worry. âWhat happened to you?â you manage to ask, but to no avail. His hands grip the sleeves of your dress, pulling them down your arms, undressing you. âJungkook, answer me!â you donât fight back his touch, but you are worried, not knowing what you have to deal with. He only mumbles incoherent words, lips latching onto your neck, sucking purple bruises down your throat.
âJust help me, please.â He whines, his hand rubbing his prominent bulge searching for some relief. You gulp, putting your own hand over it. âWe shouldnât do this, I donât know what are you on. I should call the doctor.â but despite that you still caress his throbbing member in hope of making him feel better.
âI need you. Now. JustâŠY/N, pleaseâŠâ he struggles to take off his clothes while you watch, once naked he lies down in your bed, his eyes closed. âCome on top.â he motions with two fingers towards you. You sigh and take off your dress, climbing gently on top of him.
âThis is like our first night together.â he smiles brightly, making you chuckle in slight embarrassment with the thought of such memory. With a little of his help you push his aching cock inside, whimpering at the stretch. He moans loudly, feeling his pressures being relieved. âGood job, baby. Now bounce a little.â He seems completely out of it, but somehow he still takes control over what you do, fully aware of what are you engaging in.Â
You adjust for a second before you take on, rising from his member until only his hot tip remains inside before bottoming out in one go, ripping loud moans and whimpers out of your chests.
His hands find their way on your waist, helping with your movement, his hips jerking up every now and then, adding to the feeling.Â
The moonlight was shining upon your naked forms, beams of light reflecting beautifully onto your glittering bodies. âYou look like youâre made of glass.â He says, eyes lingering lazily, seeing you deliciously bounce up and down on his cock, enjoying yourself.
âSuch beautiful skin, shining brightly into the moonlight, I could stare at you forever, my love.â
You whine, feeling closer to your release, his words almost bringing you over the edge. His hand starts to caress your sides, working higher and higher, fingers dancing on your skin leaving a lingering feeling.
âAre you really made of glass?â he asks in a daze while rising in a sitting position, sticking his chest close to yours, holding you close.
âYouâre beautifulâŠmy glass queen.â he whispers, lips catching yours in a fiery kiss, passionate but gentle, handling you with such care, wondering if you are really going to break under his touch.
âJungkookâŠâ your mind was clouding, coming closer and closer to the feeling you were eager to know once again, the man showing signs of being even further on this height while being held in your embrace.
Without any care and only with another passionate kiss you come undone, body trembling under his touch. Him following, spilling hot inside of you, letting his head rest on your shoulder while trying to search for air.
âMy queenâŠmy only queen.â he kept mumbling until he fell limp on your bed, you following right after, too tired to search for answers in the moment. His touches detach you from reality, making you forget the events that have happened tonight.
---------------------------------
When the morning came again you realized Jungkook didnât remember a thing. He woke up with a throbbing headache wondering how and when he got into your bed.Â
He couldnât remember anything after he left with Yujin. You realized. âYou really donât remember?â you ask cautiously, slight guilt crawling into you. âNot a thing. She hurt herself and I took her to her room, I canât remember what happened after that.â His jaw clenches trying to piece together the fragments of his memory. âWhat did she do to me?â he wonders. Your stomach twists, trying hard to digest the knot that formed in it. âShould we talk to her?â you ask with worry, a heavy silence breaking between you two.
âOr do we speak to the guards, the servants, anyone who mightâve seen or heard something?â this reminded you, where is Seol. âIâve also sent Seol to look after you, sheâs not since returned!â You rise from the bed in hurry, dressing in the first gown you see. The two of you rush through the palace, your steps dragging you towards the chamber that started all of this, eager to find answers.Â
Just your luck you thought, her maiden was just leaving the room as you two arrived. Byeol froze, immediately bowing down to you. âYou Majesties, what brings you two here?â she hesitantly greeted. âWhere is Yujin, I need to talk to her.â says Jungkook in a demanding tone. âLady Yujin is resting, sheâs had a hard night, my Lord. Donât you remember?â she says with a coy smile. âA little cut wonât need that much bed rest.â his tone laced with skepticism. Byeol hesitates for a split second, thinking, before being interrupted by the door opening.
âWhatâs with all the noise, I need peace and quiet!â Yujin emerges through the room, her expression one of irritation before laying her eyes on Jungkook, a shy blush appearing on her face.
âMy lord, I didnât expect to see you so soon.â she says putting a strand of hair behind his ears. âSo soon?â your husband questions.
âOh, my poor king! You were so exhausted, Iâm not surprised you donât remember.â she says with smooth words, excitement in her voice.
âThoughâŠIâm a little sad, I thought you'd be happier knowing we consummated our marriage.â she says with an embarrassed look, her eyes meeting yours.
You take a step back gasping, eyes widening in shock at what you heard. Has Jungkook slept with her?Â
âWhat did you just say?â he asked, just as stunned. âYou were so tender with me last night. It was beautiful. Just as I always imagined it would be.â Her eyes flicked between you two for the brief moment, a spark of triumph obvious in her eyes. You felt your heart drop, staring at your man you could see his knuckles turn white. âStop lying, I didnât do anything with you!â he growls at her.
Yujinâs expression falters for a moment âMy king, why would I lie about such a thing? Wasnât this the reason I am here in the first place, the elder queen would be thrilled to find out Iâll bring an honorable heir to this world.âÂ
âYou really think Iâd believe that?â Jungkook snaps, his voice rising. âSheâs lying. Whatever she claims...itâs not true. I swear to you, Y/N.â he says, turning around, his eyes searching for yours. âI feel sick.â you say, nausea overwhelming you as your knees threaten to collapse. Jungkook reaches for you instantly âDonât trust her, you know I would never dare.â his dark eyes bore into yours, pleading for your trust. You wanted to trust him, the memories from last night kept playing in your head âDo not believe itâŠI didnât do anythingâŠâ thatâs what he kept telling you.
âIâm going to throw up, you say in a rush.â shoving Jungkook away from you kneeling to the ground, your stomach twisting in a hurry.Â
Jungkook immediately kneels beside you, his hands hovering over your back, unsure if youâd let him touch you any further. You clutch your stomach, trying to calm the turmoil within but failing miserably.
You closed your eyes, the room spinning as you try to steady yourself. âLetâs get you back to your room, Iâm calling the doctor. Youâre clearly unwell.â He picks you up hurrying to bring you back to the safety of your bed, ordering Byeol to bring the doctor. Yujin is also quick in her steps, following you two trying to look concerned about your situation.
âI donât need you here!â argues your husband when the mistress enters the room behind. âI only want to help!â she argues back, but deep inside her she just wished to witness if these were your final moments. âPlease, just try to relax. The doctor will be here soon.â he calms you down seeing you twist around in your bed, moaning in pain. In a matter of seconds Byeol and the doctor enter the room, both filled with concern. Your Majesty, let me see where it hurts.â he checks up on you briefly before his eyes widen in realization, urging everyone outside the room. Outside the air was tensionate, Jungkook pacing restlessly, his hands clenched into fists at his sides as he shot anxious glances towards the door, hoping he could receive a quicker response regarding your well-being.
Yujin stood in the corner, arms crossed over her chest, huffing every time her eyes landed on the man, upset she couldnât get his attention. "Why are you so worried?" She finally breaks the silence making him stop in his tracks. âSheâs just having a rough moment, my lord. Thereâs no need to be so dramatic." she scoffs, making the boy's sharp gaze snapp to her.
âYou think this is just a rough moment?â he was on the edge, closer to bursting in anger than he was ever before. âYou need to stop with this Yujin. All thatâs coming out of your mouth are lies.â he says through gritted teeth, his patience running thin. âYou did something to me didnât you? Yesterday, after I took you out of the grand hall.â he finally asks. âOh? I did something to you? If I remember correctly I only brought you a few hours of pure bliss my king, too bad it slipped your mind.â she steps closer, her fingers drawing circles on his clothed chest.
âYou want me to remind you what we did? How lewd we were?â Yujinâs lips curled into a sneaky smile.
âYouâre delusional.â Jungkook says, backing away from her. âMark my words. Iâll never, in my whole life, engage with someone like you.â âYou canât deny what happened between us. Soon youâll see the sweet fruit of our labor.â the girl says, making Jungkookâs face twist in disgust.
He wanted to fight back again, to get the answer he desired, but the door of your chamber opened, the doctor showing up with an unreadable expression.
âThe queenâŠâ he starts, Jungkookâs stomach dropping with concern. The doctor hesitates for a brief moment, seeming to choose his words carefully before erupting into a heartfelt laughter. âThe queen is with child.â
Jungkookâs heart skips a beat at the announcement, his mind struggling to process the doctorâs words. "With child?" he repeats, his voice barely above a whisper, a dumb smile on his face in realization. The doctor smiled kindly at him. âYes, my king. The queen is expecting. Congratulations!â
A child. His heir. The future of this kingdom. All from the woman he loves most.
He rushes inside the room seeing you waiting patiently on the bed, your hand caressing your belly. âMy love!â He says, throwing himself at the edge of the bed. He sobbed in happiness, your hand caressing the top of his head in confort. He could hardly contain his happiness. His child. Your child.
âThank you.â he says softly, kissing the back of your hand. âThank you for this blessing.â tears build up into his eyes, this was the beginning of your future, nothing and nobody could change it.
"Rest now, my queen." he soothes you softly, his voice calm, yet holding so much love. "We have so much to look forward to." he kisses your temple, then your eyes, and then your lips. You felt joy, so much joy, but also worry, mind lingering on Yujin and her words and also wondering about Seolâs whereabouts.
There were many things that needed to be solved, but for now you need to rest, to protect the life you are carrying in your womb.
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A ceremony was held in honor of you after the news broke out. The word about your pregnancy spread like wildfire through the royal court and with it came waves of happiness and anticipation for the future of the kingdom. Soon after it was also announced that Yujin was also expecting, leaving the world in shock of how something like this would happen at the same time. Jungkook was critiqued behind closed doors.
He remained resolute though. In private, he only held you close, making sure you felt his unwavering support. You trusted him, you promised to do so.
You knew what Yujin was capable of and even if a part of you felt uneasy, you knew it was for the greater good to not think about her.
As the days passed, Yujinâs presence in the palace became increasingly uncomfortable for you. It was because of her bold attempts to maneuver her way into Jungkookâs life. Every time there was happiness for you it felt like it got stolen away by her.
She seemed to be everywhere you went, when servants made remarks about how beautiful you looked with your growing belly, sheâd swoop in with her own subtle reminder that sheâs also carrying the king's child.
You tried to ignore her, but the more you tried, the more her presence became impossible to escape. Every time you found a moment of peace with your husband, she included herself demanding his attention.
It wore you down, slowly and methodically. At night, you would lie awake, staring at the ceiling, trying to quiet the unease that bubbled inside you.
When you would hear Yujinâs laughter echoing through the halls, or see her standing too close to Jungkook, a cold sense of dread would settle over your chest. You felt like you were battling a whole army with bare hands, and it didnât help that you also lost your trusty maiden in the process.
Seolâs absence felt like the final blow to your morale, the one thing you didnât expect. Her sudden disappearance left you vulnerable wondering who else was there to trust? You felt isolated.Â
Staying in the garden, with Jungkook by your side, holding your hand, his thumb gently caressing it, you felt secure, his presence bringing you the comfort you needed.
The atmosphere was peaceful, a gentle breeze blowing through your hair, the smell of fresh growing leaves invading your senses.
But close enough the beautiful scenery was disturbed by a surprising presence. âMother.â Jungkook says, walking towards to greet her in surprise.
âJungkook, my son, Y/N.â She says, her gaze lingering on you for a moment, a little warmer than before. âI trust you are well, my daughter?â âYes mother.â You say, bowing slightly but being interrupted by the growth of your child. The elder queenâs lips curl slightly as she looks at you. âYou seem healthy.â The elder queen was not one to express warmth without reason, her words made your heart race. âThis child has cured me, Iâm no longer ill.â you smile caressing your belly. âIt is my blessing.â The Queenâs gaze softens for a second. âA blessing indeed.â she murmurs before turning to her son. âHow about Yujin, how come you donât care for her like you do for Y/N?â she asks. âIâve made myself clear, mother.â the boy replies. âYujin is no longer of importance to me.â not like she ever was in the first place, he thought âMy priorities lie with Y/N and our child.â.
The elder queenâs lips twitch. âSheâs also pregnant with your child, Jungkook.â The mention of Yujinâs pregnancy brings a wave of sadness over you, knowing you have to share this spot for the rest of your life.
âThe thing sheâs carrying is not my son or daughter.â he fights back coldly.Â
âAre you certain of that, Jungkook? She recalls you donât remember, but sheâs for sure with child, the doctor confirmed.âÂ
âItâs fine, mother.â Yujinâs voice echoes through the garden, making her appearance. âThe king clearly cares only for one of his offspring. Iâve learned to accept it.â she says, her tone sad, bitter.
âYou should care for both Jungkook, donât ignore your duties.â the mother scolds him. âIâve told you, itâs not my child. I wonât care for it.â he firmly declares.
Yujinâs laugh was dry, void of any humor. âJust because you canât remember doesnât mean it didnât happen. Iâm pregnant too, canât you see?â. âHeâs right, though. It didnât happen, not how you wanted at least.â Someone interrupts, the new voice was calm but firm, and it belonged to none other than Seol.
"Seol?" you whisper, disbelief washing over you, tears burning into your eyes in happiness. Yujinâs confidence wavered when seeing the maiden."What are you doing here?" she hisses, her tone far less composed now.
âIâm here to reveal the truth youâve worked so hard to bury. You thought you could silence me by having me removed from the palace? Locked far away from my queen?â
Seol turns her gaze to Jungkook, bowing deeply in front of him. âYour Majesty." she says, taking a step closer.
âSheâs drugged you with aphrodisiac.â Everyone freezes at her crude statement. âWhat?â Your husband questions. âThe court physician unknowingly provided her with herbs meant to âease her nervesâ but they were mixed with potent aphrodisiacs. She slipped it into your drink the night of the banquet.â
Your heart pounded in your chest with ease, the pieces of Yujinâs scheme finally falling into place.
âYouâre lying!â she screeches, her voice desperate âYouâre just a servant! How dare you accuse me of such a thing? I am a queen!â
âI dare!â Seol shoots back. âI have proof, one of the guards has seen all.â Yujin stammers trying to find an excuse, her eyes darting between Seol, Jungkook, and the elder queen, searching for an escape.
âThat means nothing! He didnât want to bed with me! She turns to the elder queen, her voice now a frantic plea. âItâs still his child after all! That canât be denied!â
The maiden scoffs. âNo, it isnât.â she growls at her. âHe left you, he fought back until he arrived at my ladyâs room. You wanted to take advantage of him, but even with a clouded mind he still only thought of one woman, the only one he loves.â she says pointing towards you.
âSince the guard has seen he threatened to turn you out, but you paid and promised him a good life if he gave you what you wanted. The child youâre carrying.â
Gasps echo through the garden, and all eyes turned to Yujin, who stood frozen in shock, her face pale. âYouâre bluffing!â the woman shrieks, desperate and wild. âYou have no proof! This is just another ploy to ruin me!â âThe physician and the guard are ready to testify before the court. Heâs also here demanding to claim his child.â
Seol confirms, making way for the guard to enter. His first instinct was to throw himself at your feet, pleading at the king to not behead him for his unfathomable actions against him.
âItâs true.â the man declares, his head on the ground. âI am the father of the child she carries. I have betrayed you my king, I beg for your mercy.â The silence that followed was deafening.
Yujin stumbles back, her composure crumbling as her face twists in panic. âN-No! Heâs lying! H-Heâs trying to destroy me!â
The elder queenâs cold gaze fell on her, unseen fury hiding behind her eyes. âEnough!â she commands âYouâve deceived us all, Yujin! Your lies end here.âshe turns to the guard, raising his head from the ground.
âYou swear this is the truth?ââI swear on my honor, Your Majesty. She sought me out in her desperation to fulfill your wishes. I could only comply, I was a weak man.â Yujinâs knees buckle, her body hitting the ground, sobbing uncontrollably.
âGuards, take them away!â Jungkook commands, all of you witnessing them being taken away.
Seol turns to you and bows deeply. âMy queen, I only wish I could have acted sooner.â she says with sadness in her tone. âYou must have endured so much.â
You step forward, your hand resting lightly on her shoulder in reassurance. âThank you, Seol. Youâve done more than anyone could ask.â
Jungkook approaches, wrapping an arm protectively around you, resting his head on your chest. âItâs finally over, my love.â you smile looking at the family you were building, at the man you never failed to trust.Â
Jungkook turns towards Seol, his hand resting on top of her hair, blessing her. âSeol, youâve proven your loyalty to this family and this kingdom. Youâll be rewarded for your bravery.â
The elder queen approaches you with an apologetic look. âThis child you carry is a symbol of hope, a way to your strength.â she begins
âI hope you can spare me some forgiveness for all my wrongdoings.â her hands clasp in front of her showing vulnerability.
âForgiveness is not something I withhold, mother, but it requires time. Youâve hurt us dearly.â She understands you, stepping back, giving you the space you need. It takes time to heal after everything youâve gone through, perhaps, you can forgive her one day.
You feel hopeful now, the events being a lesson from where you learnt great knowledge. Theyâve taught you about loyalty, love, and resilience, lessons that will guide you as a mother, as a queen, and as a partner to the man who has stood by your side.Â
The sun bathed the palace in its golden light. In that moment you smiled at him, taking his hand into yours, looking lovingly into his eyes, seeing not only a new beginning, but also a future greater than you had ever dared to imagine. In the end, you truly were The Glass Queen, not frail and delicate, but someone who shines the brightest, even after the most treacherous storms.
#kpop fanfic#kpop imagines#bts#bts imagines#bts jungkook#jeon jungkook#jungkook#jungkook fanfic#jungkook x reader#jungkook x y/n#jungkook smut#bts smut
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Can you make a Mr. Silver or Mr.Machete fic. I've barely seen any fics of them :(, just kinda been consuming what I can for a fic. The most common ones I encounter are Mr.Crawling and Mr.Scarletta (which I've finished all of them possibly)...
Any tag is good, fluff, angst, uh... smut? I'm just gonna read anything since I'm so content-deprived đ
anatomy of feeling
He saw you as a research subject, and you doubt he even saw you as a friend. And yet, you let him cut you open, spread you apart and put you back together. The least he could do is kiss you in return, right?
â§â á”á” đ â
Ëâź hhelellooooo have this mr silvair fic realising he actually kinda likes u lol
warnings. AAAAAAAANGST, unrequited feelings (kind of), mr silvair typical research (u know what i mean), hurt/comfort, HAPPY ENDING! :D
You donât mind being a test subject- you were too far gone to even consider going home anymore. You were human, you were monster- and now youâre somewhere in between that you donât have anywhere you can exactly call home, but Mr. Silvair was âkindâ enough to lend you his room, a bed to sleep on, all in exchange of hacking your body to a mushy pile of meat from time to time!
Itâs not an ideal situation to be in, head over heels on the guy who researches your body inside out- and itâs not like he even likes you- youâre not even sure if Mr. Silvair is one to understand romantic feelings, anyway.
You remember the first day he indulged you- missing human skin to skin contact, missing a real connection to somebody. Mr. Gap had so kindfully lent you a magazine from the human world, and you can only imagine he gave you it free of charge because you were so down. Of course, it just had to be a magazine promoting some romance movie, the lead couple all snuggled up and kissing on the front page.
You broke down crying. You mean, of course Mr. Gap meant well, but really? It was an embarrassing state you were in, fat tears running down your face and dropping onto your legs.
Mr. Silvair had found you, obviously. Your new home was a research room.Â
âYou okay?â he asked, lips tugging into a frown. âPain? Hurt?â
âSad,â you corrected, using your raincoat sleeve to dry your eyes. Your cheeks flushed with embarrassment. âMe sad. Miss home. Want home.â
Mr. Silvair kneeled down in front of you. âThis home.â
You bit your lip, and looked away. âMissâŠâ Stuff? Things? â...stuff from home.â You gesture to the magazine. âHumans. Touch.â
âMiss this?â he questioned, taking a seat beside you. He picked up the magazine, eyeing the front cover through his bandaged eyes, and flipped through the pages momentarily. âWhat miss?âÂ
You pointed to the front page. â...This âkiss.ââ
âMouth touch?â
You nodded. âMouth touch.â
âKish?â
You shook your head. âKisssss,â you hissed the words out.Â
âKisssss,â he repeated, your hiss echoing.
You giggled, cheeks still wet from your tears. You wipe your eyes once more. âMiss kiss. Miss hug. Miss⊠human touch.â
Mr. Silvair set the magazine down and faced you. He patted the spot next to him, and you scooched yourself over. He tilted his head at you, a smile on his face. âMe kiss you?â he asked, and you froze. âKiss you, you happy. Interested in kiss.â
The weight of his words settled over you like an uncertain storm. You studied Mr. Silvairâs face. The suggestion caught you off guard, yet his sincerity was unmistakable.
Your lips parted to speak, but no words came. Could he even comprehend what he was offering? Did he understand what kissing meant to humans, or was he simply trying to imitate the concept based on your longing? He had always been practical, clinical even, in his interactions.
Who were you kidding? Of course he doesnât understand. He saw you as a research subject, and you doubt he even saw you as a friend. And yet, you let him cut you open, spread you apart and put you back together.
The least he could do is kiss you in return, right?Â
You nodded, and Mr. Silvair didnât make a move to kiss you at all.
âTeach kiss,â he said.
Oh. Right.
His lips, cold as they were, carried a surprising softness, almost cushiony. It was strange, almost surreal, feeling such a delicate part of him when so much of your life in his presence had been sharp edges, instruments, and prodding hands. There was no pressure in the kiss, no demand- just a willingness to learn. It was methodical, curious, like an experiment he was determined to get right.
After that moment, his kisses were a frequent part of your life. He sliced you, diced you, and put you back together and kissed you so softly afterwards that whatever remaining pain you felt was an afterthought.Â
And you still werenât happy. His kisses were to keep you in check, to keep you from being a sad little subject. And of course, your body may not be human, but your feelings and heart were. It just reminded you that no matter how much he touched you, or when he learned where to put his hands as the kisses deepened, that he was still unattainable. He still wasnât yours, but you were his.Â
âYou okay?â he asks, offering you a hand off of the table. âMind flawed? Shape flawed?âÂ
âIâm okay,â you reply with a shake of your head, and grasping his hand. âMind good.â
Mr. Silvair smiles, wrapping an arm around your waist and interlocking your fingers together. His head ducks down, silver hair falling off of his shoulder and presses his lips to yours. You close your eyes, indulge in the moment, and move your lips against his.
It hurt.
It was like pressing against a bruise you couldn't stop prodding- painful, but addictive in its familiarity. Because no matter how much you wished otherwise, you couldnât forget that these kisses werenât rooted in love or desire. They were a kindness, a calculated gesture to keep you "fixed," to stabilise his research subject.
And you couldnât bear it anymore.
It wasnât his fault. He didnât know what his closeness did to you- how much it fed the ache of your loneliness while also making it worse. He didnât understand the depths of your feelings, and he never would. For him, this was just another experiment, another connection to study and emulate. But for you, it was everything.
So you decided, silently and painfully, to stop kissing him.
The next time he leaned in, tilting his head expectantly, you pulled away ever so slightly. âNot now,â you murmured, offering a small, strained smile. He tilted his head, confusion flickering over his face, but didnât press further.
At first, it seemed like nothing had changed. He continued his work as usual, observing, dissecting, and repairing you with the same meticulous care. But when the moments came- those pauses where heâd normally press his lips to yours- youâd shift away, redirecting the moment with a comment or a question.
And he noticed.
At first, he didnât say anything, but you saw the way his brows furrowed whenever you turned away, the way his hands hovered near you, uncertain. He started lingering after procedures, watching you with an intensity that made your chest tighten. You could tell he was waiting, expecting.
One day, after yet another procedure, he hesitated longer than usual. His hand brushed against yours, his face mere inches away as he whispered, âSad again?â
You shook your head quickly, forcing a smile. âNo. Not sad.â
He frowned. âNo kiss,â he said, more a statement than a question. His voice carried a weight you hadnât heard before.Â
You swallowed hard.âI donât need it,â you said softly, though your heart screamed otherwise. âIâm okay.â
He stepped back slightly, his expression unreadable. For a moment, you thought heâd let it go. But then he spoke, âKiss⊠make you happy.â
Your chest ached at the simplicity of his words, the sincerity behind them. He didnât understand. He didnât know how much more it hurt to keep pretending, to keep grasping at something that wasnât real.
âItâs not about that,â you said, your voice trembling. âIâm okay. Really.â
Mr. Silvair didnât respond. Instead, he nodded slowly, and turned away.
In the days that followed, he grew quieter. His usual precision faltered, his movements distracted. He still cared for you, still treated you with the same careful attention, but the pauses- the moments where heâd once leaned in for a kiss- were now filled with silence.
One evening, after he injected the medicine into your arm, you heard him speak from across the room. âNo kiss⊠you not happy.â
Your breath caught in your throat, and you turned your head to look at him. He sat at his desk, his hands clasped tightly together, his head bowed.
âItâs not that simple,â you whispered, tears stinging your eyes. You blinked them back. Just how much more of this could you take before you break fully, and he couldnât put you back together anymore?Â
He looked up, his bandaged eyes meeting yours as though he could see straight through you. âMe not enough?âÂ
The words broke something inside you. Because he wasnât enough- not for what you wanted, not for what you needed. But the truth was, you werenât enough for him either. You couldnât make a man who doesnât understand like you. Any attempt was futile.Â
So you stayed silent, letting the weight of your unrequited feelings hang in the air between you.
Days passed, and the silence between you and Mr. Silvair grew heavier, though neither of you addressed it directly. You carried the weight of your feelings alone, trying to convince yourself that distancing was the right choice. Meanwhile, his quiet melancholy lingered, each unspoken word from him carving a deeper ache in your chest.
But then, one evening, everything changed.
You sat on the bed, fiddling absentmindedly with the corner of your raincoat. Mr. Silvair had been working at his desk for hours, his silver hair catching the faint light as he scribbled notes and adjusted instruments. You thought he was too absorbed in his research to notice you, but suddenly, he turned.
âIâŠâ he began, his voice hesitant, and he stood up, walking toward you with slow, deliberate steps.
You glanced up, startled. âWhat is it?â
He stopped just in front of you. Your legs hung off the bed. âYou⊠stay sad,â he said, his voice quieter than usual. âNo pain. No hurt. Shape good. Mind good. Why?â
The question hit you harder than you expected. You took a shaky breath and shrugged. âItâs⊠hard to explain.â
âExplain,â he pressed, his tone more insistent. âWant you happy.â
It was as if someone had dumped ice cold water on top of you. Want you happy. Why? He shouldnât have cared in the first place if you were happy or not- he shouldâve just cared that you were sound of mind, and not trying to kill everything in this place. Your hands shook. Your breathing picked up. Your heart hammered uncomfortably against your rib cage.
Your fists clenched. You scowled. âWhy care?â Iâm nothing but a subject. âMe⊠only research.â
Your question caught him by surprise. He frowns, and takes a seat next to you on the bed. Mr. Silvair is silent for a moment, processing, thinking. âNot-...â he stops himself. You gaze at him from the corner of your eye, his fists clenching and unclenching in his lap. âNot only research.â
Great. Friendzoned.Â
âYou donât understand,â you say, âYou donât feel like I feel, Mr. Silvair. You canât understand.â And under your breath, you utter, âTold me that a million times alreadyâŠâÂ
âTeach me,â he said simply.Â
Your breath caught at his words. They were so simple, so stark in their honesty, yet they cut through all your swirling thoughts. Teach him? How could you possibly teach someone like Mr. Silvair something as complex, as human, as love? Did he even have the capacity for it?
You stared at him, analysing. Was he being⊠for real? His bandaged eyes stared intently at you as if he could see straight into the messed up web of your emotions. His lips, which had been both your salvation and your torment, were pressed together in a slight, thoughtful frown.
âTeach youâŠâ you repeated, your voice trembling. âHow?â
He tilted his head. âTeach âkiss,ââ he pointed out softly. âTeach this. This feeling.â
You knew better than to believe in it. He didnât know what it meant to love, not in the way you felt it, not in the way humans could. He was a scientist, a researcher, so lost in his experiments that heâd forgotten what it meant to simply feel without measuring it, calculating it, dissecting it into pieces. He wanted to understand, yes- but could he really?Â
âCanâtâŠâ you mumbled. âI donât think I can. Cannot learn to feel. You donât feel like me.â
Mr. Silvairâs frown deepened, and he reached out, his cold fingers brushing yours. The touch was hesitant, almost unsure, but it made your heart ache all the same. âFeel... something,â he said, voice low. âWhen you sad, me⊠donât like.â
You stared at him, startled. It wasnât a declaration of love, not by any means, but it was more emotion than youâd ever heard from him before. More than you thought he could express.
âWhy?â you whispered. âWhy do you care if Iâm sad?â
He hesitated again, his fingers tightening slightly around yours. You half expected an Me interested in you, but⊠âYou⊠important,â he said haltingly, as though the words themselves were foreign to him. âYou hurt, me feel wrong. Dislike. Interested in you⊠care you.â
Your heart ached. âYouâre serious?â
He nodded. âWant you happy. Interested⊠learn. Want learn.â
For the first time in what felt like forever, hope stirred in your chest. It wasnât perfect, and it wasnât the fairy tale romance youâd dreamed of, but it was real.
âThen⊠letâs figure it out. Together.â
A faint smile tugged at his lips. âTogether.â
This time, when he leaned in, you didnât pull away. The kiss was still awkward, still unsure, but it carried a warmth that hadnât been there beforeâa promise, fragile but genuine.
And for the first time, you felt like maybe, just maybe, youâd found a place to call home. Not in a room or a world, but in the arms of someone who wanted to learn how to care for you as much as you cared for him.
#homicipher#mr. silvair#homicipher x reader#mr silvair x reader#mr silvair headcanons#mr silvair hcs#homicipher headcanons#homicipher hcs#mr silvair angst#homicipher angst#homicipher fluff#mr silvair fluff#mr silvair
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Danny's Daycare Part 19
Masterlist Shortly after Danny and the boys had left everyone gathered in the cave. Those who hadnât known about the Phantom/Danny situation were filled in so they could discuss what theyâd learned that night as well as summon Phantom to tell him what theyâd found. Dick was listening intently. Despite reading the files shortly before their company arrived, Dick wanted to be sure he had all the facts.
âSo,â Steph frowned. âWeâve got a ghost king whoâs claiming a branch of the American government called the GIW has been trying to experiment on and kill his people, a law called the Anti-Ecto-Acts which means itâs legal for them to do said experimenting and killing, and Danny who supposedly knows the ghost king and is affected by the law that makes him legal property of the government?â
Bruce nodded. âWe are still trying to understand Dannyâs connection to all of this and how it is that heâs affected by this law- as far as we can tell heâs entirely human. We arenât sure how he would have come into contact with enough ectoplasm to deem him a âghostâ but-â
Jason cleared his throat, effectively cutting Bruce off and silencing everyone in the cave. âI⊠may have left out⊠some details.â
âOh no,â Tim cuts in. âTell me you didnât know.â
âKnow what?â Bruce sighed, already clearly tired of this back and forth.
Tim crossed his arms and glared at Jason. âThat Dannyâs died before?â
That set everyone off. Dick himself didnât know what to do with that information. Heâd watched all night as Jason smiled at Danny, thinking no one would notice, and then heâd watched as Jason scolded the family for prying (he was right to do that they could obviously see Danny didnât want to answer their questions) and chased after Danny when Santiago had dragged him off. Theyâd spent a lot of time outside before coming back in and everybody could tell something had changed.Â
They were both more relaxed, stood slightly closer together, their eyes lingered on each other when they thought no one was looking, and Jason was actually laughing along with the family! It had been a long time since heâd seen little wing so happy and he wasnât ashamed to admit; heâd gotten emotional about it. He didnât want to think anything was up with Danny, he wanted to imagine Danny had a nice normal life, a good family, and a personality that would bring some happiness and normality to Jasonâs life.
âWhat do you mean, Tim?â Bruce asked, cutting through all the other raised voices.
Tim pinched the bridge of his nose. âWhen Kon came over he- well he wanted to see if Danny was hiding anything on his person. Iâd filled him in a bit about the situation and heâs heard me trying to figure out what Dannyâs deal is for a while now so he used a bit of X-ray vision and thatâs why he dropped the pie. âCause Dannyâs got an autopsy scar.â
The cave was silent, everyone thatâd been looking at Tim promptly looked towards Jason, waiting for an explanation. Jason swallowed visibly. âI⊠didnât know that.â
âThat he died or that he had an autopsy scar? âCause it sounds like heâs got a lot more scars than that, Kon was⊠Kon said heâs only seen scarring that bad on people like us- vigilantes.â Tim pointed out.
Jason sighed, sitting a ways away from the family- a habit heâd picked up after coming back and needed to physically distance himself from them when he got overwhelmed. Dick had always hated how far his brother kept himself from them, tucking himself away behind an immovable wall, keeping his real feelings and thoughts blocked off, for his and their protection.
But instead of remaining apart, staying at the table heâd first sat at- that theyâd all avoided in order to give him space- Jason stood and moved closer, closing the circle the family had formed. âIâm friends with Danny in and out of the mask.â He started, crossing his arms to protect himself from the closeness. âHeâs told Jason some things and heâs told Hood some things and IâŠ. didnât feel right telling you all of it.â
âWe need to know everything you know about him Jay-â
âNo. You donât.â Jason says firmly. âI will tell you what Iâm comfortable telling you and then we can summon Phantom. Maybe he will tell you more, maybe he wonât. Maybe if you show up at his apartment in your tall, dark, and gloomy costume heâll tell you what you want to know- but Iâm not telling you everything he told me in confidence just to satisfy your curiosity. Didnât you learn anything from dinner tonight?â
And- yeah, that was fair. They hadnât been as nice to Danny as they should have, and while it was obvious in hindsight that theyâd backed him into a corner, Dick really had just wanted to get to know the man. Danny was an enigma. Someone whoâd befriended Damian, whoâd brought down Jayâs walls, whoâd expressed interest in Tim and his life, Danny was a good guy. Dick wanted to know everything he could about that man.
Bruce sighed, relenting, and Jason started talking. âI donât know about the scarring. I do know he⊠died a long time ago.â The room tensed, Dick tensed. âHe came back different- like me. But not- not like me. He was confused when I asked about Pit rage stuff. After coming back he did the whole teenage vigilante for a while to protect his town. He gave that stuff up a while back, traveled for a while, and ended up in Gotham.â
âDo you know who asked him to come here?â Tim interjected, getting the room's attention. âHe said he was here as a favor. He said a friend asked him to come to Gotham and help out and thatâs why heâs here. Do you think it was Phantom?â
Jason shrugged. âPhantom said they knew each other, heâs the ghost king and Danny was an undead kid vigilante who fought ghosts to protect his town. Itâs possible I guess.âÂ
Tim had returned to the batcomputer, typing quickly and looking for something specific. Dick noticed Jasonâs hand was shaking, clinging to his bicep in an effort to stop it and keep people from noticing, but Dick saw it. He was no Bruce- certainly no Tim- but he was a good ass detective and he noticed a lot more than some people thought. Especially when it came to the emotional state of his family members.
(Call it being an empath, call it a trauma response to Bruceâs emotional constipation his whole life, whatever, Dick could read emotions in others almost as well as Cass could read body language. He couldnât always interpret exactly what it meant, but he noticed the little things. Jasonâs hands shake heâs angry- usually when heâs pit ragey.)
Clapping his hands together, Dick tried to bring the mood up a bit. âWell, should we all change and get ready to summon Phantom? Where better to get our answers than directly from the horseâs mouth?â
âAnd then he asked Jason on a date!â Santiago finished.
âCome onnnnn.â Miguel groaned, smacking his head against the headrest dramatically.Â
Danny wasnât sure why Miguel seemed so upset by this news or why Santiago was so happy about it but he tried not to think about it too much as he pulled the car onto their street and felt a pulling in his gut.
âI donât know what you see in him, Danny-â Danny felt Miguelâs eyes on him as he cut off. âWhatâs wrong?â
Concentrating on staying where he was and getting the boys home safely, Danny began to sweat. He could refuse the summoning if he wanted, push it away entirely and get rid of the sickening tug, but he really needed to figure out what Hood had gotten done concerning the GIW. So instead of outright refusing, he delayed, speeding up the car. ââM getting summoned.â He managed, turning another corner sharply.
âNow?!â Santi shrieked as the car took one more sharp turn into their parking lot and came to a sudden halt.
Shutting off the car and hopping out, Danny gestured for them to follow. âCome on, quickly.â The tugging in his gut was starting to hurt and he wondered why he hadnât just given Hood his Phantom number the last time theyâd spoken. Tucker made you a Phantom phone specifically for this purpose!Â
Once heâd ensured the boys were in their apartment safely, he allowed his transformation and the summoning to sweep over him. Relief washed over him as he felt his body be swept away before settling into a dark cave. Looking around, he found computers, weapons, vigilante gear- was he in the Batman lair?
âItâs called the Batcave.â Hood snorted. âHey Spooks, mind turning down the light show?â
Oh, right. Letting the bright light that appeared every summoning, Danny floated closer to the ground and took note of all the vigilantes around him. He hadnât exactly expected⊠well, all of Gothamâs vigilantes to be there during his next summoning. âAnything for you, Hood.â He winked towards the crime lord, earning him a scoff from Robin.Â
âKing Phantom-â
âJust Phantom.â Danny cut Batman off- Ancients he interrupted Batman. âIâm not really into the whole formality thing.â
Batman dipped his head subtly. âPhantom, Hood informed us of your situation and to say I was shocked was an understatement. I have a meeting with the Justice League scheduled for tomorrow to relay everything we know and figure out a plan to repeal the Anti-Ecto-Acts as quickly as possible.â
Danny nodded slowly. âI must admit, Iâm surprised at how quickly youâve acted. Nevertheless, I and my people extend our gratitude.â
âWhy wouldnât we act quickly?â Nightwing asked.
Pursing his lips, Danny crossed his arms. âBatman is paranoid, untrusting, and hates metas in his city unless theyâre Signal.â He pointed at the yellow hero lazily. âAnd technically? Ghosts arenât even metas, weâre other. Different. Wrong. Wasnât sure how youâd all feel about that.â
âBatman would never allow such crimes to continue!â Robin snarled.
Dannyâs lips quirked up, he liked Robin, despite the kid's snark. It was part of the appeal really, he had strong opinions and wasnât afraid to share them. Heâd quite enjoyed sassing his rogues throughout his vigilante career.
âRobin.â Batman scolded.
Shrugging, Danny leaned back, still floating, hands behind his head. âI donât mind, I like a kid who speaks his mind. But how would I know that? Iâve never met Batman before. I must do whatâs best for my people.â He frowned, losing a bit of the lazy look and growing more serious. âKeeping them confined to the Realms is no longer the best course of action. And unfortunately, Scarecrowâs little stunt the other night has lit a fire under my ass so to speak.â
âLanguage.â A couple of the vigilantes chimed in, almost like it was a habit.
Danny frowned. Hadnât he just heard that-
âWhy has Scarecrowâs attack moved things up?â Spoiler asked.
How much did he want to tell these people? For now, he wanted his identity to remain a secret, too risky to reveal himself, but he wanted the GIW gone and for that heâd need to be as honest as possible. âDanny Nightingale,â he started, catching the shift in the caveâs atmosphere. âIs a⊠personal friend of mine. Heâs been in hiding from the GIW for five years now. The attack has unfortunately⊠alerted the GIW and others to his location.â
âWhat reason does Danny Nightingale have for hiding from the GIW?â Batman asked.
Had⊠Had Hood really not told them? He knew Hood was a good guy, but to keep private the things Danny had shared with Hood even after everything that had happened⊠It warmed his cold heart. âHood⊠did not tell you?â
Red Hood crossed his arms.Â
âDanny died when he was fourteen.â Phantom tried for nonchalance. He hated talking about it- all ghosts did- but he didnât want them to know he was uncomfortable. âHe was brought back to life when, during his death, his body was flooded with ectoplasm. His body was killed and brought back until neither side won and he ended up half dead half alive.â He let that sink in.
âHow the fuck-â
âThatâs not poss-â
âNightingale-â
âEnough.â Batman stated. Once everyone quieted down a bit, he turned to Phantom. âHow is that possible?â
Phantom had touched down to the ground at this point, standing between Red Hood and Signal. He shrugged. âI donât really know, it just is. The⊠electricity killed him but the ectoplasm kept him alive and afterward he remained alive and dead at the same time. Schrodingerâs boy if you will.â
âYou know Shcrodinger?â Signal breathed, not really asking Phantom but more himself.
Phantom intended to answer the question, maybe with a joke or maybe just plainly, but he was stopped in his tracks by Red Robinâs next question.
âBut what about his autopsy scars?â Red Robin said seemingly before he could stop himself.
Dannyâs head whipped in his direction. âWhat?â He snarled.
Red Robin glanced at Batman, swallowed, and looked back at Phantom. âUm- a- a friend of mine- superboy, he accidentally used his X-ray vision and he⊠sawâŠâ He trailed off, possibly noticing Phantomâs less than friendly air.Â
Heâd risen again, floating a couple inches off the ground and crossing his arms to hide the shaking in his hands. Maybe if he⊠if he told them⊠theyâd understand just how bad the GIW was. The final nail in the coffin. Heâd met a lot of these vigilantes before, they seemed nice enough, besides, how long did he really think he could hide the truth from them? As long as they didnât know he was Danny, as long as Danny didnât have to look them in the eye and pretend he didnât know they knew, itâd be fine.
âIt is not an autopsy scar.â Phantom managed to say.
Red Robin frowned. âBut he said it was-â
âIt is NOT an autopsy scar.â He said, pressing his eyes shut tight, voice commanding. Waiting for his rage to settle a moment, he continued. âIt is a testament to how far the GIW will go to get what they want.â He looked each vigilante in the eye (sort of), waiting for it to sink in. âAutopsies happen after youâve died. I assure you,â He inhaled sharply. âDanny was very much alive- and awake- when that happened.â
âWhat the fuck.â Red Robin breathed. Phantom waited, unsure of what was about to happen. Red Hood was frozen, his toxic ectoplasm signature flared as his fingers stretched for his guns.
Spoiler gasped. âThatâs fucking-â
âVivisection.â Robin finished coldly.
Everyoneâs reactions were similar; anger, despair, confusion. Batman pinched the bridge of his nose, Robin lowered his katana, jaw dropped slightly, Red Robin was clearly having some kind of inner war, Signal and Spoiler looked between each other and Black Bat who had been staring at Phantom since heâd arrived, and Nightwing- was he crying? It was subtle, barely noticeable, but Danny was sure he heard a sniffle from the manâs direction.
âWhen-â Batman growled, clearing his throat. âWhen did this happen?â
Phantom considered him. Why did it matter? They couldnât go back and make it unhappen. âShortly before his eighteenth birthday.â That was all he needed to say. So why did he find himself continuing? Saying more than necessary? âHe was discovered by some local ghost hunters, drugged, restrained, and experimented on for-â he caught his breath, hesitating only a moment, but Black Bat seemed to catch it. âFor almost two months. The-â
âFUCK!âÂ
The group startled as something shattered across the cave. Startled, Danny turned to Hood whoâd grabbed the nearest thing and thrown it across the room- hitting a glass window around what seemed to be a med bay. The man breathed heavily, his toxic ecto-signature continued to rise.Â
âHood-â Batman started.
Phantom cut him off. âHood. Relax, Dannyâs fine.â He pushed as much Safe-Protected-Healed-Calm-Relax into his words as he could and it seemed to work, the manâs shoulder untensed a bit and his hands stopped resting on his guns. Phantom could feel everyoneâs eyes on him but he didnât want Hood to feel them so he continued. âIâm not going to let anything happen to him, and if you lot do your job right, the GIW wonât be able to try anything ever again.â
It was touching that Hood was angry on Dannyâs behalf, but he didnât need it- not really. He wasnât as naive as heâd been five years ago- wouldnât let anyone close enough to trick him again. Heâd warded the apartment he lived in heavily, no one with ecto-weapons could get inside, heâd warded it against specific people as well- Jack and Maddie, the GIW agents he knew of, Vlad, the list went on.Â
âWho were the ghost hunters?â Red Robin asked, typing on the batcomputer furiously.
Danny wanted to be mad about the question (how dare he ask about them, the people whoâd ruined him, whoâd taken all his trust and cradled it close to their chest with loving smiles only to crush it under their boot and cut into it and-) but it effectively took everyoneâs attention away from Hood, allowing the man to calm down without anyone staring at him. Phantom closed his eyes and took a deep breath before admitting to a truth heâd run from for years. âHis parents.â
~~~~~
Damian was having a good night overall. Heâd invited Nightingale- well, the Nightingaleâs, he supposed, over and got to spend a great deal of time with Miguel and Santiago. Santiago was a bit younger than Damian and they didnât have much in common, but the boy's love of animals allowed them to maintain conversation throughout the night. Todd had been acting strange throughout dinner and in the barn, but Damian had shrugged it off, it was Todd after all. He was fine.
Later in the night Drakeâs paramour was also acting strange but Damian did not care. Heâd enjoyed showing Miguel and Santiago around his home, introducing them to his animals, and talking with them extensively about the concept of vigilantes, heroes, and anti-heroes.Â
When theyâd all been called into the cave and heâd been filled in on the conversation with Nightingale at the dinner table, heâd felt confident that Phantom would be able to answer their questions. Nightingale had an aversion to talking about his past before Gotham, specifically his hometown and his parents, and while Todd made an excellent point about all of them having complicated relationships with parents, it made them all curious about what could have caused Nightingaleâs complicated relationship with his parents.
After all, it was unlikely his parents were assassins, or circus performers whoâd been murdered, or a supervillain, or had sold him out to the Joker who killed him so-
âHis parents.â
Okay so the likelihood that his parents were in fact supervillains and had sold him to someone evil was actually very high. Throughout the entire conversation Damian had felt his blood pressure rising. Nightingale was one of the few respectable people heâd met since moving to Gotham. He was intelligent, kind, good with animals and kids, and respected those around him.
Who in their right mind would hurt Nightingale intentionally? He heard his sentiment echoed around the room as his family processed what exactly Phantom had just admitted. Drakeâs incessant tapping on the keyboard had stopped, his jaw clenched tight in a way that mirrored fatherâs expression. And yet, despite how upset everyone looked- Richardâs expression made him wonder if the man might be crying- Cassandra looked sadder than them all.
Her ability to read body language was one heâd long coveted, but in that moment he wasnât sure he wanted to know what Phantomâs body language was saying.Â
âYou can look, but youâre unlikely to find anything about them.â Phantom continued. âIâve had my best people wipe anything about Dannyâs hometown from the internet. They built his new identity and he is here under my protection.â
âSo you are the friend who asked Danny to come to Gotham and help out?â Brown asked.
Phantom gave a strained smile. âAs a matter of fact, I am not. Danny does whatever he wants, I simply⊠gave him a new identity to do so. Not that I did the hard work, Technus and a friend of Dannyâs did that.â
Damian wanted to know everything about Nightingale. He didnât want to know anything about Nightingale. Two sides of his desire warred inside him. His desire to know everything about everyone at all times fought his side that wanted to believe someone as kind as Nightingale had never suffered such hardships.
He knew that sentiment was childish, he wasnât a child, but why must every kind person he meet go through unimaginable pain?Â
âWe must bring his parents to justice.â Damian gritted out.
Phantom gave him a sad look. âUnfortunately, everything that both his parents and the GIW did, are completely legal. Due to Dannyâs death he both produces and consumes ectoplasm. Until the Anti-Ecto-Acts are repealed and Ectoplasmic beings are protected, nothing can be done.â
âBut once we do, we must bring his parents to justice. Who are they? What are their names?â Damian demanded.
Giving the same sad smile, Phantom shook his head. âUntil the Acts are overturned and protection is given to all ectoplasmic beings I will not be giving out that information.â Damian started to speak but Phantom spoke over him. âI really must be going- I was in the middle of something when you called. If you give me your phone Hood, I can give you my direct line instead of my summoning line.â
Todd, whoâd calmed down from his earlier tantrum, handed his phone over immediately and watched as Phantom typed in his number presumably.
âIf you have more questions, message me.â He directed to Batman, handing Hoodâs phone back. âAnd if you ever need something handsome, call me.â He winked before a swirling green portal opened behind him and he sank back into it as it swallowed him.
Once the portal had disappeared, Damian looked to his father who was deep in thought. Typically the entire family would start talking, petering, asking questions, all at once, but for once, they were all quiet, waiting for Batman to say something.
âI have a meeting with the Justice League tomorrow, we will discuss all of this including what weâve learned tonight. Hood, if you wouldnât mind giving me Phantomâs number so I can invite him to the meeting, I would appreciate it.â Father moved towards the computer where Drake was still working. âI want everything you can find on Daniel Nightingaleâs original identity, where heâs from, his parents, everything.â
âB, Iâve been working on this for months I canât-â
âRed Robin.â Father spoke lowly. âDo what you can. I want tabs kept on Danny Nightingale at all times, we have no way of knowing how fast the GIW will work to get him back. No one goes alone, we patrol in pairs until this is sorted, understood?â
Everyone nodded, albeit somewhat reluctantly. Damian had to agree with their sentiment. He had no desire to be held back from patrolling his own route solo but knew there was no getting around his fatherâs paranoia.Â
âUh- I work alone.â Thomas said, raising his hand uncomfortably.
Batman considered this for a moment. âCheck ins with Oracle every fifteen minutes- no exceptions.âÂ
Thomas sighed, nodding in agreement. âYeah okay.â
âFather, this is ridiculous. Surely the GIW is not such a danger to us?â Damian understood caution, but this was a bit much- bordering on how he behaved when Joker was loose.
âActually-â Todd scratched the back of his head, his helmet held under his arm. âTechnically a lot of us probably fall under the GIW guidelines. I definitely do with the whole âdead then notâ thing, and you and Cass grew up around the pits- itâs pretty likely we all have a bit of an ecto signature or whatever.â
Father grunted. âPatrol in teams. Check ins every fifteen minutes. Do not approach unknownâs alone. Understood?â
âYes, father.â Damian replied emotionlessly.
Heâd find whoever had done this to Nightingale and heâd make them pay for it.
~~~
âMiguel? Santi? Iâm back!â
Danny had portalled back to his apartment, changed into comfier clothes, and made the short trip across the hall to the boysâ apartment. Theyâd given him permission after the incident with their bio dad to walk into the apartment without knocking but he still made sure to announce himself when he did.
Something in the apartment was different though- colder- and dread settled in his stomach when he received no response.
âBoys?â He turned the corner into the living room. âIâm ho-â
âOh hey, Danny, you look young- itâs like looking into a mirror. Ten years ago.â
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Kagari Amagase
Things I can Only Do With You at Night: Ch1 | Ch2 | Ch3 | Ch4 | Card
Emma: "The sakura manju is delicious! It's so cute and round that I find myself admiring it for a while before taking a bite."
Emma: "Prince Kagari, would you like one too?"
Kagari: "Sure."
After watching over the shopkeeperâs belongings, Prince Kagari really did go around the festival with me.
Itâs so much more funâno, infinitely more funâwith someone else, and I could feel my spirits lifting compared to when I wandered alone.
(Prince Kagari isâŠ)
(Hmm⊠I canât tell anything from his expression.)
I stopped in front of a stall that caught my eye.
Emma: "Prince Kagari, look, thereâs a ring toss game!"
Kagari: "Yeah, I can see that."
(The prizes vary depending on the score you get.)
(Oh, that little basket bag at the top is so lovely! But it looks like you need to get the highest score to win it.)
Kagari: "âŠ"
(Maybe I should give it a try. It could make for a nice festival memory!)
Emma: "Prince Kagari, do you want to try the ring toss too?"
Kagari: "Sure."
(Ugh⊠I didnât land a single ring. They were softer than I expected and kept flying off in weird directions.)
The prize I chose with my score was a bottle of colorful konpeito (sugar stars). Its cuteness made me forget my disappointment entirely.
(Still, Prince Kagari casually scored the highest. I shouldâve asked him for tips.)
Kagari: "Here, take this Princess."
He handed me the lace basket bag I had been eyeing.
Emma: "Is it really okay�"
Kagari: "I wouldnât use it if I kept it."
Kagari: "From the looks of it, itâs well-crafted by a top-tier workshop. Itâs sturdy and will last a long time."
Emma: "Then, Iâll accept it⊠Thank you."
The bag was well-made, with a smooth and pleasant texture. A small sakura charm dangled gently from the handle.
ââââââ Flashback ââââââ
Kagari: "Youâre easy to read. Thatâs something Iâve learned about you."
ââââââ Flashback End ââââââ
(I mustâve let my feelings show again.)
(There were plenty of other prizes he couldâve picked. Maybe he chose this on a whim, but⊠Iâm so happy.)
Emma: "AhâŠ"
Suddenly, Prince Kagari grabbed my hand and took a bite of my strawberry candy.
Watching him lick his lower lip up close sent my heart racing.
Emma: "Please, just tell me if you want some!"
Kagari: "If I told you, I wouldnât get to see your reaction."
(He means when I get flustered, doesnât he?)
(It feels like heâs made this a kind of game⊠but stillâŠ)
When I stole a glance at Prince Kagari, his expression remained unreadable, though the corners of his eyes had softened just a bit.
(Well, if heâs enjoying himself too, then I suppose itâs fine.)
Trying to hide my own smile, I took a bite of the strawberry candy as well.
(Maybe Iâll switch out my current pochette for the basket bag.)
(Oh, waitâŠ)
Kagari:Â "Whatâs wrong Princess?"
Emma: "Prince Kagari, do you have a moment later?"
....
Emma: "Would you like to light some sparklers with me?"
After finishing with the stalls and returning from the bustling streets to the castle, I opened the wooden box I had taken out of my bag.
Emma: "Someone gave me these sparklers while I was helping with festival preparations."
Emma: " I was saving them for the festival day, and Iâd really like it if youâd join me. If youâd likeâŠ"
Kagari: "âŠ"
Emma: "Prince Kagari?"
Kagari: "Itâs nothing."
Kagari: "I just thought it was a little childish to suddenly want fire."
Emma: "Would you like a sparkler?"
Kagari: "Sure."
(He agreed! Thatâs a relief.)
Something about the slight widening of his green eyes caught my attention, but I handed him a sparkler nonetheless.
For some reason, Prince Kagari stared at it for a while before finally taking it.
With anticipation in my chest, I brought the sparkler close to the candle flame he had lit for me.
A small orb of fire blossomed like a flower bud, scattering orange sparks with a gentle crackle.
(Itâs so beautifulâŠ)
It didnât have the grandeur of fireworks in the sky, but the way the sparks changed shape over time was ephemeral and captivatingâenough to make me forget to blink.
(Wow, the sparks are growing even brighter and stronger now.)
Kagari: "âŠ."
Emma: "Prince Kagari, your sparkler is beautiful too."
Kagari: "âŠYeah, itâs mesmerizing."
(But his gaze hasnât left me this whole timeâŠ)
(Maybe he prefers how my sparkler burns?)
(Ah, the sparks are starting to fade.)
As the end neared, the number of falling sparks lessened, and the glowing orb quietly dropped away.
Prince Kagariâs sparkler also went out, and the quiet that followed felt tinged with a certain melancholy.
(Perhaps I feel this way because the festival is truly coming to an end.)
Emma: "âŠIâve found one more thing I love in Kogyoku.â
Kagari: "You have a low threshold for liking things, donât you?"
Kagari: "When you leave Kogyoku, tell me how many things youâve come to like."
Emma: "Youâll be surprised! Please look forward to it."
Emma: "Prince Kagari, thank you for accompanying me to the festival and lighting sparklers with me."
Kagari: "I just had the time."
Emma: "Even so, Iâm happy that you spent that time with me."
When I look back on today, the fun memories come rushing back one after another.
I got to interact with many people from the town while helping prepare for the festival.
(Surely, the next time I see them, Iâll be able to greet them more casually. ButâŠ)
I suddenly found myself imagining the day Iâd eventually have to leave Kogyoku.
The pang of sadness that welled up was even stronger than what Iâd felt when the sparklers had burned out, and my gaze unconsciously turned to Prince Kagari.
(Prince Kagari isâŠ)
(âŠHeâll probably be the same as ever.)
âŠâŠ
The next day, I went to a sweets shop to buy some dorayaki-flavored candies.
There, I heard a startling story from the boy who had given me the sparklers.
Boy: "They say, if you do sparklers with someone you care about, just the two of you with no interruptions, youâll be bound together."
Boy: "Thatâs what I wanted to tell you that day!"
Emma: "I seeâŠ"
Emma: "Is that a legend everyone in Kogyoku knows?"
Boy: "Yep. If anything, itâs rare for someone not to know it."
Emma: ".....Is that so."
(If heâd just said doing sparklers at the festival brings good fortune, it wouldâve been better butâŠ)
As I forced myself to suppress the dizziness creeping up on me, my cheeks grew hot at the thought of Prince Kagari.
(Does Prince Kagari know this legend too? âŠNo, he probably doesnât remember things heâs not interested in.)
(And he isnât someone I care for in THAT way, so thereâs no reason to be flusteredâŠ)
ââââââ Flashback ââââââ
Kagari: "âŠ"
Emma: "Prince Kagari?"
Kagari: "Itâs nothing."
ââââââ Flashback Endââââââ
(âŠCould he have misunderstood something? No, thereâs no wayâŠ)
(......âŠ)
(How should I react the next time I meet Prince Kagari�)
âŠâŠ.
Shigure: "Hey, Kagari, whyâd you have Emma help with the festival preparations?"
After the regular meeting, Shigure's question stopped Kagari in his tracks.
Kagari: "âŠIt was a whim."
Kagari: "If I had to give a reason, itâs because I thought sheâd find it easier to spend time here if she got to know a few more faces in this unfamiliar country."
Shigure: "Wow, thatâsâŠkind of thoughtful."
Kagari: "Besides, if people recognize her as someone I know, they'll keep an eye on her out of curiosity."
Shigure: "Wow, thatâsâŠheartless."
Kagari: "You didnât know that about me?"
Shigure: "I did, actually. Well, having the townsfolk keep an eye out could be useful if something happens, so I see where youâre coming from."
Shigure: "And what about the festival day itself? After dealing with that enemy, you disappeared somewhere."
Kagari: "I went around the festival stalls with her and did sparklers."
Shigure: "Anyone else there? âŠJust the two of you?"
Kagari: "Just the two of us."
Shigure: "Ah, I see. I see."
Kagari: "âŠ? Whatâs with that creepy look on your face?"
Shigure: "Wait, do you not know about the sparklers legend, Kagari?"
Kagari: "I donât."
Kagari: "That was my first time even holding sparklers."
Shigure: "Ah, I see. Well thenâŠ"
Kagari: "Honestly, I couldnât understand what was so enjoyable about it that sheâd light up like thatâŠ"
Unconsciously, Kagari's jade-green eyes wandered toward the spot where he and Emma had lit sparklers the previous night.
Kagari: "âŠBut I got to see something good."
Kagari: "I wouldnât mind doing it againâŠwith her."
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#Iâm convinced that this is THE sweetest romantic story in ikepri#ikemen prince#ikepri#ikepri translations#ikemen prince spoilers#ikepri kagari#kagari amagase
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Why Regulus dying was crucial to the plot of Art Heist Baby!
It really pisses me off and people say "Omg it's so sad that Regulus never finished the heist, why did the author have to kill him?! He never finished his life's purpose" No it's not, because that wasn't what he wanted in life, he achieved everything that he wanted.
The story doesn't work if Regulus lives. Art Heist Baby isn't about the heist. I mean it kind of is, that was what drew me into the fanfic, why I read it. But, as I read it, I realized that it's not about the heist, it's about love, it's a love letter from @otrtbs, the author, to art history and to the fandom, and about the love of found family, brothers reuniting, and falling in love and all the sappy stuff.
But Regulus and the readers by extension, have always thought that it's about the heist, that it's about the infamy and being remembered, and that's how he lives forever, the heist gets him his brother back, the heist lets him live forever.
But then in Copenhagen, when he's literally dying, he's having this internal monologue, like, maybe I failed this heist and it's not successful and I didn't do what I wanted and I wasn't the best person, but I was loved, I am loved and I have loved back, he says that he knows he can take that love with him wherever he goes, even if he's a damn star in the sky, it doesn't matter. He's taking that love with him, it lives on, and that is its own form of immortality. That's what Regulus had been searching for this entire time and even after Regulus dies, James is still there, and Sirius and Barty and Evan hell all the others in the team, and it's like even death can't defeat that kind of love. We see James talking to Regulus every night and recounting memories and keeping Regulus alive in a way, which is what Regulus always wanted!!!! Just not in the way he thought he was going to get it.
I mean, otherwise what's the alternative? Regulus lives and he's happy with James, and maybe that's better than living on an infamy and better than the heist because, well, he's actually alive, but it's not just about love. Regulus and by extension, the reader wouldn't have this moment of realisation like, oh, it's love, love is the answer. Love is what makes all of us a little bit immortal for a little while. That's what it's all about in the end. Not the money or fame or notoriety. Just love. And Regulus dying feels like it was the best way Nat could have driven that point home. Like plz look past the heist, what else is there?
Because Regulus spent his whole life thinking that this was his goal. Just one more heist, that's what he'd always said right? One more heist, this is the last one. This is it. He'll have achieved everything he's ever wanted. Except, it's not what he wanted. Because throughout the story, he gets his brother back, he gets Sirius back in his life after spending years in silent mourning dangling just as precariously as the daunting Degas in the bathroom, he gets his brother back. He sees Barty and Evan who have spent their whole life going back and forth, finally getting together. He watches them grow up and grow together, and he spends his entire life with them. He brings together this group of strangers, this ragtag team of random people that applied via a fucking poster about a lucrative job and watches them bond. He watches relationships form, he connects with the Remus through annotations and books and a shared love for Sirius, he organizes dorlene's proposal and wedding!!!!
He bonds with all these people that he never would have met if he led a normal life, and then he meets James. He meets James Potter, who teaches him everything, who lets him borrow his bravery and shows him that life could be so much more if he wanted it to be, which he does.
"I love you, that's all." His last words, love, that's all. Not the heist, not the drop offs, not the money or the fame or the glory. Love, that's all. He started getting involved with the heists to feel loved, to get the attention that Sirius got from their parents growing up. Some superficial kind of love, and his life ends after he gets real love, platonic and romantic. Love, that's all, not the heist. He died with everything he knew he always wanted but never had the bravery to attain until then. That's why he said maybe he hadn't lived a long life but he lived the best life he could have.
Nat literally told us the reason with Regulus' last words and all of us decided to turn a blind eye to yes, yes ik it was heartbreaking to see him die and not live in the house in Brazil with James but we do see them meet again in the epilogue don't we? And let's trust Regulus and the author both when they said
"in every lifetime?"
"in every one."
#sorry for the rant#but i stand by every word i said#art heist baby#regulus black#marauders#marauders era#fuck jkr#james potter#jegulus
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bookie!
journalist!reader x business-man!hakari
cw...NSFW, slight manipulation, mention of intox, use of "mister" "sir" "doll", dumification, degradation, all the usual smut stuff LOL
word count...4.8k
a/n...this is my first fic ive posted publicly EEEK lowk nervy but i've read like 2 good hakari fics on this mf website and i js figured i might as well do it myself. my writing here IS NOT MY BEST, i plan to indulge into how i usually write. smut is a little harder for me to write so be patient AND NICE PLZ. mdni!please understand what kind of media you are consuming and be smart about it.
just the way hakari presented himself, it felt as if even if you didnât suspect anything from him, it was obvious he was a secretive and cocky man. from how he dressed with his constant change between pimpy-fur coats and vulgar tanks with his ever-changing colored hair between purples, blacks, and blondes, it was no surprise he mustâve lied his way to the top.Â
and even with this assumption, you couldnât deny the offer of living with him and your company's team. not necessarily living with him but staying in a private luxury hotel, and sure, maybe your job here wasnât very important as a journalist but your boss insisted on you attending.Â
what kind of moron would pass on the opportunity of possibly breaking through one of japanâs wealthiest and slyest business men anyway?
something about interviews but mostly projects, maybe even a documentary went in your ear and out the other when your boss spoke to you about the expectations on this âtrip.â
after being stuck on a reserved bus, you finally manage to push through and make it to a not very deserted place. matter of fact it was right in front of a busy street in the busiest city. you stretched your legs, cracked a few fingers, and headed to the entrance of the tallâwhat seemed to be marbledâhotel. if you could even call it that. seemed like a resort more than anything. you were told your bags full of equipment for work and clothes for the three day project would be handled by security. the front of the building were two big guards protecting any outsiders. pretty confidential for just a few days. it stays on brand with hakariâs whole attitude, a whole ass hotel in the city only allowing a few people with specific identification.Â
inside it looked like everybody from every corporate office in town had been messily dragged in. heavy steel tables were set randomly with even heavier bags and briefcases on top, open with papers and documents spilling out.Â
the man himself was sitting at one of the sturdy desks, his head down.
before you noticed that he decided to go purple, left his black blazer on the shoulders of the chair he sat on, you watched as his hand shook carefully on a paper given to him by the lady standing nearby.Â
his hot pink eyes dart back and forth across the page. you assume he was looking for another place to sign because he handed it right back to her after examining. hakari returns back to a binded notebook, the pen still in his fingers. he scribbles words down vigorously. part of you wonders what heâs got going on. another part wonders where your room will be.Â
you observe the rest of the lobby. you glance at your boss finally coming through security, the dumb, happy guy starts a conversation with almost everyone as he came. he calls hakari over as if theyâve known each other since the dawn of time, and he follows. they greet one another and you go blank on the rest until your name is called. quickly, you turn to face the men again and walk towards them.
"if the interview goes wellâwhich i'm sure it willâperhaps the documentary could follow up.â your boss explains, still turnt to hakari.
âmhm oh yeah man iâm sure of it, yep.â he agrees, mooning. his white button up hugging him perfectly.Â
scrunched up sleeves, pen marks on his forearms. a few buttons undone from the neck.Â
âthis young lady right here is the foundation of the writing department.â
âoh yeah. so iâve read.âÂ
he reaches a hand out, âtook you a while to say hi.âÂ
âyou seemed busy, signing shit nâ whatnot.â you smile politely and firmly shake his hand. he cheeses a toothy grin, blue and silver gems shine back at you.Â
âpardon her words, man. you know how writers areâcan write page upon pages yet their mind goes blank when they have a chance to speakâhah.â your boss shines his own nervous smile.Â
âya, know what they say about business men, can talk for hours and hours, spill what seems to be almost everything, and still have secrets.â he darts his eyes to yours before closing and laughing richly with the older man.Â
ïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïčïč
you spend the rest of the night cozying up into your hotel room and lazily journaling down ideas, even scraping up an idea against hakari. you stretch your arms after tossing your notebook shut, you glance over at the alarm on the desk,
11:24 P.M.Â
it would be a good time to grab a snack, now that everyone should be asleep. at least you hope so as you walk out in casual clothes.Â
you toss the roomâs card from hand to hand and pass quiet rooms until turning left to the snack bar. you were told earlier that food would be available for the company whenever, so you figured it must be open now too, with all the staff asleep or at their posts.Â
there was an incredible aroma of columbian brew with a dash of vanilla dancing with something hot, something fresh out of the oven. youâre greeted with his strong back. shaped tightly, almost too tight, was a simple white tank. on caramel skin, his wide shoulders flexed as he took a small spoon into his mug, tossing sugar packets and singles of liquid creamers into a trash bin. but it doesnât really phase you. what were the chances of somebody being here? let alone hakari. itâs ironic and mostly awkward.Â
you couldâve left but the pastry before you was calling your name. how awkward could it really be?
you walk towards the counter he was just at, he who was walking back to a two-chaired table.Â
âitâs almost midnight.â he speaks and you freeze as if youâve been caught. obviously, you havenât, so you quickly grabbed a floral napkin and the pastry.Â
âwriters stay up late, i know that. but theyâre usually alone.â
âwell how was i supposed to know somebody else was gonna be up? it is almost midnight.â
âyouâre the one writing stories about me and talking shit, iâd assume youâd know everything about me.â he grins as he pulls a chair out, sitting in it and slowly stirring his coffee. steam swirls up from the cup. âtake a seat.âÂ
you walk to him and pull the other chair out, sitting quietly. you break apart the food in your hands and eat it piece by piece, examining the table subtly.Â
heâd been sitting there for a while; papers closed a binder with a few pens spilt around. an empty chip bag, a few crumbs near the bottom of the coffee cup, his hands warming up around it.Â
his hands were nice.
you swallow casually and look back at him. âyou read my stuff? which one of your little employees do you have search for works written about you, huh?âÂ
âi find âem myself, ând you're lucky i donât report them. canât have nasty stuff circulating around me, whether if itâs true or not.âÂ
ââor should i call them workers instead?â you ignore him.Â
âyour writing is admirable.âÂ
something about that made you lose track of what you were saying.Â
you lay back in your chair and mumble an okay.Â
you watch as he takes a sip of his sugared coffee, the steam cupping his face gently and flowing up.Â
âso when do you sleep?âÂ
âiâll go in a couple,â he says, cracking his knuckles. âscheduleâs got all fucked ever since i got here. my managerâand donât tell her i said thisâdoesnât understand the concept of time, or maybe sheâs fucking with me. how can i get three hours of paperwork done, meetings between each pile, ând make phone calls back to back, but canât stay up late?âÂ
âdamn, youâve even got your sleep schedule sorted?âÂ
âgotta sneak out here like some goddamn teenager. itâs no big deal, sheâs knocked out at 10. jusâ gotta keep kissing her ass and thank her for taking such good care of me. she wonât suspect a thing.âÂ
you giggle at the irony, âmight as well be your girlfriend.âÂ
âgod, more like my mom.â you can see the outline of his tongue grazing his teeth as he grins. probably feeling the gems on his smile, you cross your legs at the view.Â
funny and handsome.Â
speaking of closing your thighsâyou remember you have to get back to your room.Â
âweâve got just three days,â you say as you stand from your chair, âiâm sure weâll have to work our asses off tomorrow.â hakari looks up at you.
âhmm nobody tell you whaâs happening either?âÂ
you shake your head and carefully bite the inside of your lip.Â
âmâkay. have a good rest of your night, then.â he nods back down and sips his coffee. his tone indicated he practically knew you werenât sleeping immediately. to enjoy the rest of your night.Â
âyeah, iâll make sure of it. goodnight.âÂ
as happy as you were to receive a half-vacation, half-business trip at a hotel â the benefits of not having to wake up early just to drive almost an hour to work everyday, the entire company just being outside, your hands would not suffice. you thought to yourself earlier, how great itâd be to stay in a nice, cool room and wind down from a long day. keeping dirty fantasies in your head and just when you thought the tight, small circles on your heat could master an orgasm. but the thought of him kept interrupting.Â
a hand crawling up your neck and the other circling underneath your panties. closing your eyes as you concentrated on silver-haired men kissing your breasts, guys who stunk of cigarettes and coffee making out with your clit, god anybody willing to run their hands on your body. you jolt at the sudden twitch of your cunt, your back arching slightly. you groan. the man youâve been practically stalking and have to work with is now appearing in your head while you masturbate. you switch the bedside lamp off and take off-white sheets over yourself.Â
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on the second day, you pass new people while walking down narrow hallways. each person looking more tired than the one before. you notice just how many people could fill up the lobby and snack bar. as enticing the syrup from breakfast smelled, you keep your distance from everybody else. carefully, you lick the inner of your lips and taste the lipgloss you applied earlier.Â
now popping your lips, backing up slowly, still examining the room until you feel what seems to be a pillar or wall behind you.Â
âhey⊠you got a light?â behind you. tall, peeping over you â was that a fur coat? hakari watches everybody else almost as intently as you were.Â
you stutter before reaching into your coatâs pocket, âyeah.â he takes it and quickly lights the now-appeared-cigarette of his mouth.Â
âa smoke for breakfast? that canât be healthy.â you cross your arms as he flips the lighter in the air.Â
âit wouldnât have been, hun, we had breakfast this morning already. don't you remember?â he exhales smoke that passes your jaw, making you shudder.Â
âhere, sounds like you need it.â he says the last part through his teeth, pinching the end of the cig and lowering it to your mouth. you glare to your side and lean in to wrap your lips around it, inhaling. you pull away and spew smoke out much more discreetly. he takes another, blowing it out, licking his lips, âtastes like bubblegum.âÂ
after set-ups and mic-checks in steel stools and numerous questions, youâre sitting in front of a laid-back hakari. his legs man-spread and his hands fixing his hair every other second. a very specific rage comes back to you. the same anger that you felt staying up to post blogs about complicated, but evident-filled, theories and what you truly think is the truth about the man sitting in front of you. the feeling is nostalgic. your nerves are overfilled with different emotions â since when could a man controlling so many industries, controlling so many people and still handle an underground fight club while acting like a semi-normal person? but normal people donât wear fur-fucking-coats on the regular, let alone keep illegal ranges where people fight like bears just to be bet on like horses.Â
two cups of steaming coffee are placed in the high-wooden table between you and hakari.Â
âthis part of the interview will be audio-presented. the second part will be videotaped.â the host of the section stands above the recorder, the rest of the crew standing around or still finishing breakfast. âetiquette for the tape is pretty simple â âms and mrâ is usually set and the rest is self-explanitory.âÂ
you nod kindly and look at the man, meeting his eyes, ones that perhaps never left you.Â
easy, almost-boring questions are asked but it hadnât prepared you for what was going to come. the questions slowly make less and less connection and stay focused on hakari. âethicality is mentioned within businesses and is no exception to your work, ms l/n.â before being asked the repetitive question, the topic being how many times can we make hakari look like a god in one tape, you interrupt the host.Â
âmorals are nowhere to be found in such work. thereâs â again â no sense.â now slouched, hakari responds, âtell me, when searching for a job that pays well, were you interested in the pay or how many hours you had to work? âs there something you wâna say about being able to survive or how comfortable you are?âÂ
âsometimes it just boggles me to think about how one person needs more than one business. is it for fun, mister?â
âis what for fun, girl?âÂ
âis being a con-man to violent people and making them believe knocking each otherâs teeth out will help for fun?âÂ
the host stutters and gets shushed, âwell, youâre very right. that wouldnât be ethical at all.â he smiles very faintly. too faintly for you to lash out and not make it seem like youâre crazy.Â
âuntruthful about being a bookie and fight-promoter. does gachinko ring a bell?â
âany more questions? how about all my employees' salaries? wanna know my salary? howâs about âyou busy after this?ââÂ
the recorder falls off the foldable table after being shaken, âfor the love of god.â your boss yells and stops. scrunching his fat nose and pinching the bridge. âthat was the fourth time. i just⊠you know what, weâll continue tomorrow morning. kinji youâve got a meeting weâve, iâve, been trying to hold off but it seems like everybodyâs in the mood for a break.â he walks to the exit of the lobby, followed by some of his crew. hakari gets up, exhaling and cracking his fingers and wrists.Â
âalmost as good as your writing. but writers always gotta fuck up while speaking.â he picks up the recorder from the ground and tosses it to the full cups of coffee.Â
âare they going to post it?âÂ
he shakes his head.Â
âthen what?âÂ
âmight do it all again tomorrow. a little more strict, too. itâs not like it was a bad tape either. just like you know, i canât let shit spread around about me. i would never allow it.â Â
you scoff and watch him walk off, cursing under your breath.
itâs the evening when he comes back, bringing a few drunk men through the guards. you nod your head back and forth between your open laptop and the men that find their wobbly way to the lounge's couches. you tune out their slurred talk and how hakariâs joking gets belly-laughs from them. he cackles with them, clapping his hands bluntly. he sighs, tears in his eyes, as he walks past the random suitcases and desks spread-about.Â
you type away at your slightly dull keys, clumsily taking your gel-pen and drabbling a note down.Â
âworkinâ hard, i see.â you feel a heavy hand land on your left shoulder and glance over to the other side of the desk, hakariâs ringed-fingers tapping away at the steel.Â
âwhatâre you writing downâŠâ he mumbles and leans over obnoxiously. you lean back in your chair, looking at him looking at your notes.Â
âgod, are you drunk? didnât you just have a meeting?âÂ
âdrunk? nah, i donât get drunk.âÂ
âi can smell the whiskey from your breath.âÂ
âah-ha, you knew i drank whiskey, huh. looks like even an overworked girl like you knows how to have fun, too.â he looks at you with literal joy in his pupils. face tampered with blush while smiling like a hyena. âanyway,â he stands back up, the grip on your shoulder falling to your bare-arm. âeven your handwriting is nice.âÂ
âuh-huhâŠâ you press your thighs together, feeling the cold metal of his jewelry on your skin. his hand so big compared to your arm. part of you hopes his long gaze is down your blouse.Â
it is.
âya look good.â he speaks through the rasp in his throat but all you hear is a mutter, he gives your arm a squeeze before patting it and walking toward the corridor of rooms.Â
you let out a shaky sigh and feel yourself burn up, staring at your yellow-notepad. hakari strides to his room, the last room of the hallway, stretching his arms. he takes a gold card out and shoves it into the slot.Â
he lets out a serene moan when his back hits the bed. tossing his keys, phone, and whatever junk out of his pockets onto the nightstand. his large coat following. he groans and kicks off his shoes. something still bothering him. he reaches his hands down to his belt and unravels it, throwing it down. unbuttoning and zipping to comfort the ache below his stomach.
god, how hard could a guy get from one conversation? his slit brows raise as he grins, taking his weeping cock and holding the base.
thinking about all the things youâd say,Â
youâre so vulgar. not enough action recently, huh? what stressâll do to yaâŠ
âyeah, baby, stress.â he takes his other hand and taps the underside of his cock in his palm. closing his eyes and imagining your sweet self between his legs, those same tits in his view. your pink tongue lolling out for him. âfinally shut that smart-ass mouth up⊠use her for something fuckinâ useful.â he groans, stroking himself.Â
what makes him throb is how dumb youâd gotten when his hands were on you. how fucking sweet and quiet you went when his fingers stroked your arm, werenât you exposing him just a couple of hours ago? what a desperate girl. he swears out as he jerks spurts of come onto his clothed shirt. âyeah, hmph god, yeah, thatâs good..â he pants like a dog, eyes going heavy.Â
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another day passes and you havenât come. guilt swats your hand away everytime you try, anyway. you start to get sick of the syrup and eggs roaming the air. you sit at the same spot from last evening and observe the room.
half of your company is eating breakfast or still passed out on the couch. the others, probably asleep or dealing with tech. your boss walks towards you and places a cup of coffee down in front of you.Â
âwe oughta work on you, huh? hah!â he stirs wood in his own cup.Â
âyouâre not hungover? iâm surprised youâre up this early.âÂ
âgotta stay professional, ya knowâŠi only had one shot. maybe a couple. this coffeeâs really good, drink some.â
âright because drinks on the second day of a work-trip is highly professional.â
âhey, come on.â he frowns and drinks a sip of his obviously too hot roast. âwhere is everybody? hell, whereâs kinji?â he drifts off to a new group of people near the snackbar.Â
the lobby fills again with the occasional technical difficulty, yet no hakari to be found. you wish you could throw it off and be so disconnected that you didnât even realize the star wasnât here like some of your colleagues, but you kept your eyes on that same corridor. the loud bitch from the room on the tallest floor went through your ear and out the other. you didnât even realize the fly that was constantly buzzing had been trying to get your attention.Â
âdo you know where kinji is?â she was beautiful but still his assistant, loud and fussy like a bad mom. if she didnât know where he was, how were you supposed to know? you put on a concerned look with a little smile, âmight be in his room.â you get up and begin walking to the hallway, how the hell did they not check his fucking room? you swear your eyes roll so far to the back of your head, that if you didnât have ears to hear the bitchâs loud heels clacking, you couldâve seen her behind you. you turn to the last door on the right and knock, remembering how many men had to carry luggage upon luggage inside.Â
âhello? mister, weâre waiting on you.â you knock faster than time. âhakari?â the door swings open and your hand is met with another. before you can say anything, he shushes you and looks around, pulling you into his room and says, âgive me aâminute. take a seat.â he leaves. by seat he probably refers to his bed, the entire room cluttered by stuff. you sit on the edge of his bed and sigh, taking a moment to collect what just happened. Â
he was shirtless. the bathroom door being open and light on explains why, heâd taken a shower. the mirror was still foggy and the towel hung on the doorâs hanger. there was a faint smell of vanilla and something floral. you wouldâve been pissed to be in a messy room like this but you figured it was better than being out with everybody else.Â
the door opens again and a calm hakari walks in, closing the door and locking it.Â
his hair is damp but you only notice how heâs clothed in a towel. one that hangs low at his hips.Â
âeverybodyâs waiting, and youâre not even dressed yet.âÂ
âsâfine, y/n. i bought us some time. these people, theyâll listen to whatever i say.â he says with a smile, and you look back at him with confusion.
âbut the interviewâŠ?â your mouth drops gently when his hand comes to hold your face.Â
he sighs and looks up and away. your legs are shut and you swallow the sudden pool of saliva in your mouth as your eyes are fixated on his sharp, shaved jawline and how his adamâs apple flexes as he speaks. âthis jobâs real tough, i know it is, ând you want a break. doesnât everyone?â he looks back down at you, his eyes filled with what seems to be.. lust? you furrow your eyebrows and nod slowly. he carefully puts some hair behind your ear and leans down to whisper against your skin, âwâna be a good girl and take some of that stress away from the both of us?â he kisses a part of your jaw, âmy good girl?âÂ
oh god.Â
did you write half of your career on this greedy man just for him to be licking your ear? leading a hand to your button-up and slowly undoing the pearly clasps?Â
his hand now on your bare leg, going up and up your mid-pencil skirt. you feel yourself get dizzy from the thought of him feeling your lacy panties, holding a hand on his strong shoulder, his skin slightly wet. did you wear them on purpose? you canât think. he stands back up, his hand slithering and rubbing the back of your neck. breathing heavily, you start to undo the rest of your shirtâs buttons. âyeah, there ya go.â he encourages you until your laced bra is exposed.Â
he hooks a finger on the side of your panties and tugs them off, you reach under your skirt and tug the other side. he takes both sides and peels away, âmhhm, always liked a matching set.â your skin burns at embarrassment, not from what he said but how wet the middle of your core was and how drenched the crotch of your panties were.Â
âa lilâ kissinâ got you this soaked, huh? you want this? ainât you just sweet, doll.â he throws it to the corner of the bed and hums when you nod. âsâquiet when youâre needy.â hakari pushes two fingers at your lips just when you thought you could finally say something. âopen.â he demands gently and grins when you comply. they find their way to the middle of your mouth and you canât help but suck softly. âmhm thatâs good, suck âem good. cost aboutâa milliâ each, heh.â he takes them out and pushes you slowly onto your back, spreading your legs, holding one up with a burly arm.Â
âfuck.â is the only thing you manage to let out when he bunches your skirt up to your waist.
âbe quiet fâme now.â he spits a glob onto his two fingers and presses them to your clit. you gasp at the content.Â
âso wet.â he mumbles.
circling tight, slippery rounds on your aching bud. the guilty friction youâve been craving finally went through. a sudden warmth and pleasure take over your pelvis. heat rises to your upper body, your hands slightly shaking and your ears burning, god, what were you doing? you watch and feel his dirty mastered hand bring you shame. your entire career faltered just for your fulfillment, the guilt so heavy, it makes you moan out.Â
âhuuh, mister â shit, i need it.â you speak whispers breathlessly.Â
âyeah? you need it, baby?â he brings his focus to your pathetic expression, pushing and curling two fingers into your cunt. you moan out and watch, feel, as his fingers pump in and out of you. his hands are skilled as they break you open little by little. âsweet girl with a needy cunt, mustâve hit the fuckinâ jackpot.â your clit throbbing as you watch him grope himself and ease his own ache through the white towel.Â
âcâmon, please sir.â you tap the side of his waist with your heeled foot.Â
âpatience, girl.â he pulls his fingers out and pats your vulva a few times before pulling your body close to his. his hand finally, finally pulling down the towel. the thing that kept distracting you from nights of sleep now dripping pre just above your heat. he gives himself a couple of strokes, long and heavy as your body begged, driving yourself closer âtil your ass was almost off the bed.Â
âshh shh.â he rubs his wet tip against your folds as you start begging quietly, your slits sloppily kissing. he groans when your cunt flutters, pushing himself into the first tight muscle.
you writhe at the sudden burn, making you mewl ever-so quietly.Â
âbe a good girl fâme.â he presses a hand on your lower stomach in comfort before moving his hips forward with no intent of stopping until heâs bottomed out. you moan long whines and grind your body down to try and get more, the stretch already burning. âfuck, goddamn it.â the warmth you bring him is unmatched, all he can think about is how hot you feel.
âfuck me â wanâ more.â you clench down and get a moan out of him. his hands hold down onto your plush thighs as he rocks back and forth into you, your folds swallowing him whole everytime. your throat burns at the way you choke out whimpers, drool seeping from the sides of your plump lips. âwhatâs your company gâna think of you now, hmm? director of the â fuckinâ writing departmentâ their smart girlâs gotta fuck it all up cause she couldnât resist some cock.â his hips start to fasten and he keeps a tight grip on your legs, your pretty, fucked out, face stays red. ââs okay, pretty. you ainât gotta say nothing, jusâ take it like the dumb girl you are and iâll forget about all the mean little things you said, mhm?âÂ
âuh-huh.â your headâs spinning from the grinding heâs now doing, the underside of his cock rubbing back and forth and back and forth on the rough spot inside of you. your thighs tremble as you feel yourself getting close. you get louder and hiccup about how good it is.
âya â yesyesyes please awh fuck,â your hands groping at the back of your neck and the hard nipples of your breast as you arch your back off of the white sheets, âcoming â oh god kinâ iâm gonna come, come. thank you thank youâŠ!â the hard waves of heat and fuzziness take up what seems to be your entire body as you cream all over the base of his cock, hakari still pumping himself inside, riding your release out. âgod, fuck, baby. stay still.â eagerly, he takes his hard-on out and jerks himself above your mound before coming straight, hot lines of cum onto your stomach.Â
he pants, âyou wanna talk to me about my morals?â
âjesus fuck. shut the fuck up.âÂ
#goaskangel#jujutsu kaisen x reader#hakari kinji#kinji hakari#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk smut#jjk x you#new author#gojo x reader#nanami x reader#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen fanfic#toji smut#toji fushiguro#toji x reader
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Fika
characters: don, klunk, leo, mikey and raph rating: g content warnings: n/a word count: 4288 relevant tags: sick fic, sick leo, post-episode: good genes
(n.) a moment to slow down and appreciate the good things in life a leo sick-fic, requested by @sakuradiva for @tmnt4p !
[ read on ao3 ]
You may as well have called the first sneeze an alarm bell. The instant it echoed through the reservoir station, each and every one of them in range perked up, heads swiveling like a bunch of prairie dogs.
Raph seeks out Don first. He scans the open first-level of the reservoir station until he catches Donâs eye--a second after Mikey does. Don glances between them, his expression at first wide. Then his lips curl downward, and he huffs. ââthat wasnât me.â
There's no attempt to hide the irritation in his tone (and Raph couldnât blame him); a week or two of one helicopter sibling is annoying enough. Don had three. Plus Master Splinter. Plus April and Casey. Plus Leatherhead. Seven people in a semi-constant state of worry, hovering, asking questions, growing tense with anything that could be a small sign of 'relapse'. It had to get smothering at some point. And even Don had a limit to his so-called infinite patience.
ââOh!â Mikey says. He pauses, his eyes darting from Don, to Raph, and back again--clearly scrambling to deflect from what Don had drawn attention to. ââWell. It wasnât ME. My sneezes are a lot more⊠uuuuhâŠâ
âNeedy?â Raph offers.
âYeah!â A beat. Mikey's eyes widen, then he shoots a squint at Raph. ââHey, wait.â
âSorry.â Leo moves out of the kitchen, mug in hand, having lowered the heel of his palm from his beak. âI, uh. I think I mightâve stirred up some dust while I was looking for the chamomile.â
Mikey relaxes, likely happy to accept this answer and move on, but Raphâs brow arcs. âThought youân Mikey gave the cabinets a good wipe-down earlier this week.â
âWe did,â Leo says. He shrugs. âGuess⊠some of it must still be in the air. I dunno.â
...lying, Raph thinks, though heâs careful to keep the suspicion from reaching his eyes. He shifts his attention to Mikey just in time to catch the tell-tale signs of worry: a sudden stillness, like a deer in headlights, and the slightest strain around the eyes. Itâs gone as soon as it arrives, and Mikey replaces any sign of it with an impish grin.
âLooks like someone was slacking on cleaning duty,â he jabs, knuckles propped on his hips. He tilts his weight forward and tuts his tongue. âFor shame, Bronardo.â
Leo sends Mikey a passive smirk. He huffs and starts up the steps toward his room. His free hand finds the stair-rail and stays there. Raph locks onto it. He can't help but notice Leo's not resting his palm on the metal; he's holding it.
âIâll be back in a few minutes with an idea of what we need to knock out today,â Leo says. There's a slight wilt in his postureâand now that Raph thinks about it, he realizes Leo's feet drag just enough to make his usual silent steps borderline audible. Raph shifts his weight and fixes his jaw, forcing himself to hold his tongue. Leo looks back over his shoulder after reaching the threshold of his room and continues, âDonnie, Iâd appreciate it if you sat it out another day.â
Don sighs, but he waves a hand lazily over his head. âHeard loud and clear, boss.â
Leoâs door shuts, and silence settles back over the station. Raph remains by the weapons rack, and Don keeps his attention on the blueprints he has spread across the table he'd claimed as his temporary workbench. Only Mikey moves, plucking at one of his wrist bands, becoming increasingly uncomfortable with the subtle rise in tension.
â...--you think I can squeeze in just enough Resident Evil 4 that I can get far away from a save point, and heâll have to wait until I reach the next one to turn off the game?â Mikey asks. He doesnât wait for an answer; instead, he flashes Raph a wide grin and bolts for the couch with a cackle. The televisions flash and hum to life, and Raph lets out a blend of a sigh and a growl. His eyes shift to Don.
Donâs already looking at him. Even with the faint purple stains under his eyes, the mild sag of his skin, thereâs a sharpness in his stare. Raph recognizes it. He knows they harbor the same concern.
âDonnie?â
âYeah, Mikey?â
Mikey huffs as he enters Donâs room, scratching at his cheek.
âHave you seen Klunk? He was snoozing on me like usual this morning, but⊠I kinda didnât want to get up and give him his breakfast just yet." A terrible betrayal, if he were being honest. But he'd really just wanted five more minutes (which turned to ten, to fifteen, to twenty), and Klunk grew bored of swatting his face. Totally lost track of time after that. Mikey frowns, sending another short glance over his shoulder to eye the station. "He mustâve gotten cranky and left, but he wasnât in the kitchen.â
âNo,â Don says. He rotates a bit more in his chair to face Mikey and sets his pen aside. His jaw tightens, shivers as he points toward the door (an attempt to redirect attention as he stifles a yawn). âBut--uh. I know heâs really fond of that one spot by the water?â
Mikey shakes his head. âChecked. Nada.â
âOhâŠâ Donâs brow furrows. âWell⊠--have you asked Leo? He mightâve seen where Klunk ran off to; he's been up a while.â
âGood idea. Thanks, Donnie!â
Don grunts a sound in place of a âyouâre welcomeâ, and Mikey jogs back into the heart of their new lair.
There is, of course, a risk he ran entering Leoâs room: heâd narrowly managed to wiggle his way out of work yesterday, and he doubted heâd get similar results today. Leo may not be⊠grumpy anymore, but he was still Leo. A bit of a sticklerâa: wet blanket, one might venture. You could only keep up a single ruse with him for so long.
Leo's door is open when he reaches it (a welcome sight, considering how often itâd been closed in the months before), and Mikey allows himself to cross inside. The space is rather bare--with little left to salvage from the second lair and a mutant outbreak to clean up, they found themselves back at square one in terms of decor. But Leo still found a way to make the few things he had feel clean and in order. Mikey could feel almost a rhythm in the way he'd stacked books on the floor, where he placed candles, and where Leo chose to sit when he meditated. Heâs also quick to spot the ball of orange fur settled into Leoâs lap.
âHey, Leo!â Mikey chirps, careful to keep his voice just low enough so as not to startle either of them. He waits a second for one of Leoâs eyes to open before continuing, âmind if I steal Klunk off ya?â
Leo smiles. But itâs⊠a tired? smile? Mikey canât remember the last time Leo looked tired in the morning (yâknow; like a normal person).
âIâm surprised you didnât come get him sooner,â Leo mutters. He closes his eye again. âSure.â
âThanks!â
Mikey takes a wide step into the room and crouches. He digs around in his belt, locating one of Klunk's favorite snack-tubes.
âOh Kah-looooonkkkk,â he says, putting on his best sing-song-I-totally-got-treats-for-you-love-me-please voice, âyou want some tube~?â
Klunk lifts and tilts his head. Rather than get to his feet and trot to Mikeyâs side, he shifts his weight, tucking his legs securely under his body. Mikey blinks.
That's weird. Klunk never turns down an offer for tube.
Even Klunk seems to acknowledge this; his tail twitches irritably, and his ears flatten out. It's like he wants to get up butâŠ
â...hey, Leo?â Mikey props his elbows on his knees, frowning. âHas Klunk been with ya like this all morning?â
Leoâs shoulders lift in a half-shrug. âGuess so.â
âHuh.â Mikey pouts. Klunk hated a late breakfast. There hadnât been scraps in his bowl, so no one had fed him yet. Why isn't he screaming for food? ...he's definitely still sending me dirty looks.
Mikey drums his hands on his inner knees. He opens his mouthâanother question forming on his tongueâbut snaps it closed when Leo suddenly sniffs. It's a wet, strained sound, and his posture rolls forward a little. Almost like heâd just gotten dizzy, or the breath had taken more effort than it should've. Come to think of it, it... did look like Leo was breathing through his mouth more than his nose. His lips were parted slightly. Mikey squintsâglances from Klunk to Leoâand straightens up. â...your, uh... nose still bugging ya, bro?â
âA little.â
â...iiiis that all thatâs bugging ya?â
Leo frowns, but he keeps his eyes closed. His brow wrinkles. âWhat do you mean?â
âI dunno,â Mikey says, âiiiitâs just⊠yâlook kind of tired? And⊠Klunk super doesnât wanna leave your lap. Which is weird! Because he hasn't had breakfast! And I offered him a tube! He ALWAYS wants tube.â
Leo opens his eyes and frowns as he looks at Mikey. Mikey shifts his weight and wrings his wrists in his lap. Leo didnât have that needling look in his eyes like he had a few months ago, but⊠guess heâd started expecting a half-hearted glare and a growl.
Leo must have realized this, too. He winces, and his features weaken.
âMikey, Iâm okay,â he says. Mikey's lips twitch into a weak smile, but it must not have looked convincing. Leo sighs, "really, Iâm just⊠Maybe I've just got a cold.â
ââa cold?â Mikey echoes, all at once alert. His throat tightens. Somewhere, in the back of his mind, he knows it's irrational, but he doesn't care. He searches Leoâs limbsâany visible section of skin. But nothing looks open, or irritated or⊠mutated. They'd gotten separated in Bishop's lab for a while after Don got loose. Leo hadn't said anything about encountering other feral mutants, but...
Mikey rolls his lips together, eyes snapping up to meet Leoâs. âYou⊠didnât get, yâknow. Stung. Or anything and didnât tell us, did you?â
Leoâs expression drops. âWhat? --no, Mikey. Why would youââ
ââI should get Donnie,â Mikey interrupts, springing to his feet. âJust in case!â
âMikey, I didnâtââ
ââIâll be right back!" He jabs a finger at Leo and shakes his head. "Donât even think about going anywhere! Klunk's loafing on you for your own protection!! DON'T DISRESPECT HIM!â
And he bolts before Leo has the chance to respond.
Don hadn't been the only one tailing Mikey back to Leo's room. Raph followed close at their heels, but he took to leaning on the corner wall rather than hover at Leo's side. Something Leo, admittedly, found himself grateful for.
Quick to busy himself as always, Don took to checking Leo for scratches, bites, stings--any possibility Mikey listed off, thought about or began to fuss over. Klunk, his duty now fulfilled, had grown tired of Don's close proximity, and he swiftly sprang from Leo's lap, trotting to headbutt and rub against Mikey's heels instead. He still circles them now, a soft, steady purr vibrating in his chest. Leo wonders if all cats are like this: aware and attentive of who needs their comfort, and so eager to provide. Or if it's something unique to Klunk... like the little animal knew Mikey had given him a better life, here, and he was in their debt.Â
He almost snorts at himself. Probably silly to think cats thought in transactional ways... and something he still needs to work on, himself.
âYouâre SURE he's not sick?â Mikey asks suddenly. He fidgets with his mask-tails, unable to stop himself from glancing in Donâs direction. âLike..." he winces, but hints anyway, "sick-sick?â
Don huffs, keeps his eyes down.
Leo frowns, and he shakes his head. âI didn't get stung or bit by anything, Mikey. I promise."
Unless weâre counting that mutant the dragons had set loose. There's a brief second where the thought sends a wave of alarm through his chest, but it's quick to settle. That happened months before the mutagen outbreak in the city. Surely, if it was a similar kind of illness, it would have made itself known by now. He'd been bitten long before Don had been stung, and Don's symptoms began surfacing in the following weeks. His brothers must be thinking something similar; Mikey continues to send looks in Don's direction, and Raph remains oddly quiet. The silence starts to feel heavy, and Leo winces. âSorry, Donnie.â
ââdonât,â Don hastens, frowning at him. âReally.â
"So," Mikey starts, "he's not sick-sick? He's just... siiiiick-sick?"
Don sends him a dull stare. "You can just say 'infected', Mikey."
"Sorry."
"It's fine. But, no. I don't think he is." Don glances at Leo and shrugs. "There aren't any 'entry points', like he said. And I doubt he ate anything at Bishop's."
Leo grunts and wrinkles his nose. Mikey shifts his weight, unsatisfied. "What... --what about that thing we stole from Karai? --he's the one who touched it first. Do you think it cursed him?"
"Mikey--"
"--don't act like it's not possible, Don!" Mikey interrupts, clenching his fists at his sides. "We've time traveled! Space traveled! There's a whole city under our feet right now! --And--what about that... that big, red alien-monster thing that almost got Angel's bro?! --That old guy--he was totally cursed and stuff!! What if--"
â--it ainât that deep,â Raph grumbles, his voice low but sharp enough to cut Mikey off. He pushes off the wall, propping his hands on his hips. âI bet itâs âcuz this bozo got back from Japan and hit the ground runninâ. Ain't stopped since.â
Leo squints, and Raph holds up a hand, 'counting' off his fingers as he continues, âI doubt ya slept on the boat trip over. Yâcame lookinâ for each of usâgot us all back in one place. Fought Karai. Got us back on our feet, the station up 'n runnin'. The first few mutants start showinâ their ugly heads. We get sent back to the jurassic periodââ
ââcretaceous,â Don mutters, and Raph scoffs.
âWhatever! --Look, my POINT is, yâainât stopped movinâ once. You probably went and wore yourself out! Even more than usual!â
âYou were kinda training like crazy for a while,â Mikey adds, rubbing his neck. âLike. A lot a lot. All the time. I guess maybe you chilled while you were in Japan, but... also not really.â
âRaph⊠has a point, Leo,â Don says. He looks to Leo and shrugs. âAprilâs talked about this sort of thing before. Like, when she was in college? She said during the holiday breaks, sheâd come home and not have anything to worry about, and it was like her whole body released a ton of tension all at once. Sheâd have a horrible stomach ache for that first day home. Maybe⊠this is your version of that.â
âThis is the quietest itâs been sinceâŠâ Raph pauses, growls, and shakes his head. âItâs the quietest itâs been in a good, long while.â
Leo frowns. He can't think of any kind of argument. Or, at least, all the arguments that were coming to mind wouldnât help with anything. Either Raph would get irritable, or Mikey would get antsy and more nervous than he already was. And Don... while Leatherhead had been confident there wouldn't be a chance of relapse, they'd decided not to risk anything. Guess it'd be pretty hypocritical of him to go on insisting he was fine, when they'd all decided he wasn't.
What was it the Ancient One said about surrender? Leo almost couldnât help but smirk and chuckle to himself. âAlright. I guess I could take a few days to do nothing. Join Don in being a couch potato.â
âSounds ideal to me,â Mikey says.
Leoâs smirk widens. âI bet it does.â
âIf anyone deserves a ânothinâ day âround here, itâs you two workaholics,â Raph says, pointing a finger interchangeably between Don and Leo.
âAnd Klunk will make sure you both stay sitting down!â Mikey scoops Klunk off the floor. The cat mews in protest, wiggling for a moment before tucking against Mikey's chest. âHeâll be making the best biscuits this side of Brooklyn. Aren't you lucky?â
 Raph snorts, and he thumps a fist against Mikey's shoulder. âMikey and I will finish what needs tâbe done around the lair for the day. Take a load off. Enjoy free biscuits from the stupid cat, and be ready for movies and a hot meal t'night.â
Leo could hear Mikey and Raph in the kitchen, but he couldnât tell if they were bickering or just talking. Guess those were one and the same when it came to those two.
He and Don had taken to the couch, as promised. Don tinkers with his shell-cell while Klunk watches from his lap, and Leo, settled under a thick blanket, adjusts the book in his hand.
It'd been surprisingly difficult to pick which of his few books he'd wanted to start, and there was something bittersweet in the reminder that he'd have to rebuild his library a second time. He'd selected one of the fiction novels--an old fantasy, filled with mists, magic, and a winding world. He'd already read it a time or three, but the familiar pages were comforting and easy to get lost in. A small voice in the back of his mind still grumbled and tutted that there was work to do, things to check, responsibilities and tasks he'd been setting aside for higher priority items. But he ignores it (for now).
Klunk stands and arches his back. His mouth splits into a large yawn, and he gives his tail a lazy little flick before carefully padding out of Don's lap. Leo smiles and chuckles as the cat moves onto his legs instead, already purring loud enough to drown out whatever conversation fills the kitchen.
Don smirks. âLooks like itâs your turn to get cat-sat, Leo.â
âYeah.â Leo opens a hand so Klunk can headbutt it, and he ruffles his head with the heel of his palm. âGuess it is.â
Don chuckles. He sits back against the couch again and sighs, letting his hands and the shell-cell drop into his lap. Leo slants his eyes toward him. His smile sinks a little as he watches Don tug one of the throw blankets higher over his chest. â...feeling alright, Donnie?â
âYeah,â Don huffs, âmy energy just gets totally sapped after a certain hour. Itâs really annoying.â
âIâll bet.â
âMn. ...what about you?â
Leoâs brow furrows. âI⊠think so? I mostly just feel⊠heavy.â
âYeah.â
âBut not⊠--not the same kind of heavy I felt before, justâŠâ
âI know,â Don murmurs. Thereâs something⊠different in his tone, now. Leo canât quite put a word to it. Don continues, âI think Raph hit it right on the money. You get back from Japan and⊠we get you back⊠but you havenât really let yourself have much time to breathe, have you?â
âI could say the same to you,â Leo says, âyouâve been working to get the reservoir station up, functional and livable since we got here. Even while you were getting 'sick'.â
âMaybe. But⊠I hadnât just come back from a huge trip with a completely different timezoneâa-and, I hadnât beenâŠ" He pauses, cautious. "...I dunno. ...struggling...? At least not like you."
Leo frowns. âDonnie. Whether youâre drowning in an ocean or drowning in a puddle⊠itâs still drowning.â
Don blinks, glancing at him. There's a moment where Leo can't quite read his eyes, but he remains quiet. Then, Don smirks, and he lets out a weak chuckle.
âI guess youâd know about that better than anyone,â he says, âconsidering youâre the one who dove in after me when my toy car almost got me waxed.â
âItâd be a pretty embarrassing way to go out," Leo says. "Especially for a turtle.â
âYouâd also know a thing or two about that, wouldnât you? Embarrassing ways to go out.â Donâs eyes glint, and his smirk sharpens. âBig Foot?â
Leo lets out a laugh, ducking and shaking his head in attempt to mask any show of sheepishness. ââJeez! A guy steps on a landmine one time.â
âIt wasnât just a landmine. It was a landmine in clear water.â
âPlease donât remind me.â
Don laughs. Thereâs a small pause as his smile softens, and his shoulders sink into a more relaxed position. â...itâs good to have you back, Leo.â
âHey.â Leo shifts his weight enough to gently jab his elbow into Donâs upper arm. âRight back at you, bro.â
âAlright, sickos.â Raph rounds the couch, his arms held out flat on either side of him. Two large plates balance on either inner-elbow, and in each hand he has a second plate and bowl of steaming soup. Its warm, soothing smell somehow seeps through all the congestion in Leo's nose and throat, and he sighs, letting it fill his ribs. He sits forward and extends his hands, offering to take one of the sets from Raph's person. Raph shoots him a knowing smirk, and he leans just enough to let Leo lift a plate from his arm. âGrilled cheese and tomato soup: cominâ in hot.â
âOh, sweet,â Don says.
âThink you mean savory, dude!â Mikey chirps as he vaults the couch (and their heads). Leo passes Don the first bowl and plate, and he looks Mikeyâs way as his brother drops to his knees to slide the remaining distance to the television set. He spots a DVD case in one of Mikeyâs hands and realizes he recognizes it.
ââwait,â he starts, sitting up, âis that what I think it is?â
Mikey turns, flashing him a toothy grin. âIiiiiiif you mean Kikiâs Delivery Service?â
âWhereâd you get that?!â Leo asks, unable to hide the excitement in his voice.
âApril,â Raph answers. He chuckles and hands Leo the other plate and bowl, âfigured it was time tâstart usinâ her access to things to our advantage.â
Don arches a brow. âLike we werenât doing that already?â
âI mean, sure,â Raph says, âbut Kikiâs a classic! Gotta look a bit harder tâget your hands on oneâa those; âspecially a copy that ainât totally trashed.â
âAnd because sheâs totally awesome, she SPLURGED!!â Mikey says, jamming a finger against the DVD player's eject button. âThis oneâs got behind the scenesâinterviews--storyboards even!!!â
âHeâs real excited about the storyboards,â Raph mutters, though he fails to mask the fondness coloring his tone. He ambles back toward the kitchen, likely to retrieve food for himself and Mikey.
Leo settles the plate and bowl into the blankets on his lap. Klunk rises from where he'd curled between Don and Leo, and he pads onto one of Leo's knees in attempt to sniff the tomato soup. Leo gently nudges him away. âNo, Klunk.â
âLetâs put you on the ground until foodâs eaten, little guy,â Don says. He scoops a hand under Klunkâs stomach and lifts him off the couch. Klunk protests with a soft, but long, meow. He allows himself to be placed on the floor, but the look he sends Donâpaired with a flick of his tailâis more than enough warning that heâll be back before foodâs finished.
Raph returns with a second round of plates and bowls, and Mikey finishes setting up the DVD. He sprints to the light switch as Raph eases their meals onto the coffee table. The lights shut off, and theyâre left in the cool wash of the screenâs glow.
What comes next is a feeling Leo canât quite put into words. Mikey slides into the open seat on his right, and Raph settles into the nook at Donâs left. The room fills with a familiar scoreâA Town with an Ocean View, if he remembers the track name correctly--and Don thanks Raph for dinner as the two pass down napkins. Mikey shifts his weight, taking care to move and tuck the blanket so it's evenly distributed between himself and Leo. Then, he curls up, bowl in lap, and lets himself lean into Leo's side. He takes a napkin when Leo offers it to him, and Don and Raph begin banter over who gets the remote for the movie's run time.
Leo has trouble putting a name to this feeling... and even more trouble recalling the last time it fell over him, warm and soft, like an old blanket fresh from the drier.
A sense of peace. Familiarity. Safety and home. He wants to wrap himself in it and stay. Let everything else sink away.
"Remember the first time we watched this?" Don asks. He fixes the plate on his lap and settles a napkin over one of the grilled cheese pieces.
"Feels like years ago," Mikey says.
Raph lets out a soft snort. "'Cause it was years ago."
"Think we were eight," Leo mutters. "It was the first and only time Mikey ever wanted to be near a broom."
"You're just mad 'cuz I won the race," Mikey sniggers. He wiggles enough to poke his elbow into Leo's bridge. "Totally left you and Raphie in the dust. Which you had to sweep up."
"Oh, brother," Don sighs, and Raph rolls his eyes, letting out a low growl.
"Leo? Smack him. I don't wanna spill my soup."
Leo smirks. He shifts his weight, gently jabbing one elbow into Mikey's arm. Mikey whine-groans at him, but the end of it is colored with a chuckle.
Raph (apparently having won whatever game he and Don were engaged in) lifts the remote and hits the center button. The town's melody quiets, and the room goes dark as the title menu fades to black.
#tmnt 2003#tmnt#tmnt leonardo#tmnt 2k3#tmnt fic#;hannah writes#;fanfic: fika#;tmnt#;donatello#;leonardo#;michelangelo#;raphael#;klunk#[ dell and keeg '''''helped''''' me revise and edit this (they have not stopped chattering all morning) ]#[ so i hope my cleaning it up didn't actually make it messier >xD;; ]#[ thank you so much dude! ;u; hope you like it ]
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Wow..i saw the leaks and just. Wow.
I was hoping they were fake and its everything i hate in a series. I was biting my tongue until i saw the episodes but here we are.
Before i go into spoilers i do want to say that i AM grateful that we even got anymore of Arcane, but sometimes less is more.
Spoilers underneath
Edit: these are kinda messy thoughts.
My biggest gripes:
Too many plot points for a finale
Family trade in ( Bio sister for found sister for bio sister again )
Vander dying, Alive but fucked up, okay, fucked up again, dead, alive but fucked up, dead.
Not bringing up Isha at all??? Not even a quick funeral?
People being brought back to life but Isha and Jinx has to die.
Jinx has to sacrifice herself to save Vi and herself. đ
The SEX scene.
Better explaination:
Too many Plot points:
I knew it was gonna be too many. I KNOW we needed answers/resolved plots, as well as needing things to make sense. But it.. was too much. Like most media at this point.
Family Trade In:
So... no one really talks about this trope? Or whatever you want to call it. But it bugs me, so much. If you don't know what I'm talking about..
To me a family trade in is when a Character, no matter their role, has family, turns evil or gets lost and finds a family of their own, and then when it seems perfect for them, they end up back with their original family because the new family died for them/their old family or they just.. don't belong/want to go.
Perfect example that isn't Arcane: Amphibia. Anne has to leave her adoptive found family from another universe and can never go back ( until she dies basically ). As well as her friends have to leave their found families as well and also cannot go back. Anne loves both her families..
And while i understand life isn't fair, and that people are allowed to not want to stay here or there.. it just bugs me the trope is to always trade back in for the old.
With Jinx, she "loses" Vi ( and yes Silco but it isn't about him right now ), And gets Isha. I KNEW the second i saw her she was gonna die ( this isn't a bash against those who didn't see it coming ( /genuine ) at some point. While i adore Isha and i am fine with Jinx adopting her, i am not okay with the writers choice of adding her just to kill her and be practically a trade in for Vi later on.
It sucks. I'll just say it out right.
And i want to be very clear. By trade in i do NOT mean replace. I know Isha was never a replacement for Vi ( or Powder ).
Again, i know life sucks, and you just don't get everything you want in this world, especially when it comes to war. But since this is a trope or at least a thing i see constantly, whether its in a pg way or an R rated way... its annoying.
Which brings me to....
People dying / Jinx / Vander:
Why? Other than shock value?
Jinx Dies, and it felts uncomfortable to me as a Psychotic/Schizospec person like her. She should have lived, she should have been able to find her own happiness after properly grieving Isha.
Isha Dies, happy to do so for her big sister(s), but like.. it ends up not being worth it. It both does and doesn't. She saved them time but then-
Vander. Vander is killed, then brought back to life in a fucked up way, then okay for awhile, then fucked up again, then dies ( by Isha ) and then is fucked up again and alive, and then dead.......... and then fucked up and alive again! And then dies, with Jinx!
It doesn't feel satisfying. Of course that one moment was very sweet and worth it. But oh my god? Why do it at all if you're just gonna kill and reanimate him again and again. Its not shocking its annoying by the third time and a joke by the fourth.
Viktor.. Same deal with him? And I'm not even clear if he is dead or just fucked off to space-time with Jayce, but still. It wasn't shocking anymore. Or thrilling. Just like "ah. Okay. Cool mask".
Heimerdinger... when i read the leaks i thought he was gonna die. Then i was watching and thought "oh no okay, he's gonna stay in that universe. Thats nice he deserves that". Nope. He's either also dead or also in space time. I just sighed really hard rather than be sad.
And finally.. The Doctor's daughter gets to live- AND HIMSELF- even he gets a happy ending? Over Jinx or Vi? What.. i mean yes Vi gets Caitlyn , but.. ? Ugh
The Sex scene:
I'm glad for Sapphic rep i really really am. I like Caitvi a lot as well. But this didn't feel comfortable for me. Not because it was an intimate moment, but because neither of them talked things out properly. On top of that it was really random.
Vi was upset, then suddenly horny for i guess.. make up or grief sex? Or both? And Cait was obviously fine with it, but then to suddenly try and talk about Maddie. I'm glad Vi wasn't the typical ">:( you fucked someone else while i was hurting?!" It was so... random. This is why they needed to talk before hand. At LEAST say it before getting into it.
And doing it in Jinx's cell? It feels so.. weird and wrong in a way? I don't know how to describe it.
TLDR: what in the five marvel hells was that other than visuals pretty
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whos the best ghoul cook? do you think they have any weird eating quirks (like water ghouls eating raw fish, mountain chewin on his terra cotta plant pots, fire ghouls needing to eat more bc of higher body temp, anything like that)?
Did I ever tell you guys that I earned a scholarship to culinary school? I couldn't go, but cooking and baking remain passions of mine that I do NOT get to talk about enough.
But now you've given me an excuse >:)
So here, a BUNCH of my cooking (and favorite food) headcanons for the ghouls and Papas alike!
(There's some murder ghoul content here, mostly in Alpha's section - couldn't help myself đ)
Aeon isn't one for cooking. Loves eating food, certainly, but not making it. He's more of a snacker, partly because it's more convenient but mostly because he doesn't have the attention span to do much more than microwave instant noodles. He's not picky though, will eat whatever is put in front of him as long as someone else has prepared it. Also doesn't have much of a sweet tooth, more of a salty/savory guy. Favorite foods include hot cheetos, thick cut beef jerky (good to gnaw), and whatever appears on his plate at meal times.
Aether is a ghoul of simple tastes. He'll cook when he has the time, but it's going to be one of his four go-to recipes every time. Always some format of protein + starch + veg, with a complementary sauce. He meal preps every weekend after his retirement so he can have easy meals to microwave and eat in the infirmary. Isn't the biggest fan of cooking with company, unless they're willing to stay out of the kitchen and not interrupt his routine. Has a weak spot for bananas. Favorite meal is one-pan roasted chicken, potatoes and asparagus with rosemary and garlic from Mountainâs garden.
Alpha does not cook, wouldn't dream of it. He doesn't even deign to eat human food most of the time, turns his nose up at it when offered. He likes his meat raw, and wants to hunt it himself so he can feel the blood run down his chin. Any prey is fair game - if he finds you in the woods, you'd better hope you can outrun him. (You cannot.) Favorite foods include the flesh and organs of anything with a pulse.
Aurora likes the idea of cooking, but in practice...well, she tries. She's impatient, is the problem - what do you mean simmer for 20 minutes? She's hungry now! She inevitably rushes everything she makes, no matter how much input she gets from the others, and has yet to learn her lesson. She also has a MASSIVE sweet tooth, they can't keep enough sugary snacks in the pantry as far as she's concerned. Favorite foods include spaghetti with butter and cheese (one of the only things she can always get right), boxed brownies and any kind of fruity candy she can get her paws on.
Cirrus can cook pretty well, if she says so herself, but it's rare that she does it for anyone but herself. She has very particular tastes, and doesn't want to have to adapt them for others. She loves organ meat and bitter vegetables, enjoys the intensity of those flavors while the smell alone keeps most of the others away. Oh well, more for her! She'll eat anything thats made for her though, especially if its served on a silver platter by someone on their knees. Favorite foods (aside from the aforementioned organs) mostly include healthy things like fresh fruit and veggies, steamed shellfish and lean meat.
Cumulus is more of a baker than a cook, but enjoys any time spent in the kitchen either way. She's the type to make a day of it, in her comfiest clothes with music playing while she dances in front of the stove. Her food is never the prettiest, but it's made with love and tastes so much better for it. Her favorite things to bake are cookies and pies, but she doesn't eat many sweets herself. Prefers seeing the others enjoy them. Favorite foods include homemade bread (she has a sourdough starter named Breadly) with lots of butter and flaky salt, anything citrus-forward and wants her proteins heavily spiced (not spicy, she has a low tolerance, but loves the fragrant flavors of herbs and spices).
Dewdrop doesn't advertise it, but he's one of the best ghouls to have in the kitchen. His precision and attention to detail are second to none, and while it doesn't make him particularly fun to share a kitchen with it does make him an outstanding cook. He likes very intricate, involved recipes because he can use them to showcase his skills (and earn a whole bunch of praise at the dining table as a bonus). Loves spicy food, which everyone assumes is due to him now being a fire ghoul, but he's actually always enjoyed a good burn. Favorite foods include any meat served on the bone, fermented foods (kimchi and sour pickles especially) and anything smoked.
Ifrit does not know how the stove works. He survives on protein bars and any leftovers he can pilfer from the abbey kitchens. Food is not a thing he's super interested in, just takes what he needs to fuel himself, and would rather follow in Alpha's footsteps anyway. He likes to hang out at the lake every now and then with Mist, though - she'll pop up from the water every now and then with a nice plump trout to toss his way, which he will roast with his bare hands. Doesn't really have a favorite food, but does like crunchy things.
Mist, if she isn't sharing her spoils with Ifrit, will keep her catch for herself. She's small enough that one good-sized lake fish will tide her over for the day. She does prefer them raw and whole, always a bit on the feral side, but she can be convinced to join the others for sushi if the offer arises. Favorite foods include anything alive and not poisonous in the lake, and cookie dough ice cream (don't tell anyone).
Mountain is overall considered to be the best cook amongst the ghouls, and definitely has the goofy apron to prove it. Naturally skilled and adaptable, he enjoys preparing meals for his pack and will do so with anyone that wishes to lend a hand. Usually it's Cumulus or Sunshine, but they all keep him company at one point or another. He grows much of the produce used in their kitchen himself, all of it fresh and delicious, but Mountain does not eat a bite of it. He's a total carnivore - the closest he gets to eating his homegrown goodies is including them in a stew but avoiding them in his own bowl. Favorite foods include rabbit, venison and this one Vietnamese style grilled beef and rice noodle dish that Dew makes.
Omega learned to cook by osmosis, if you ask him. Time spent under three Papas will do thay to a ghoul. He doesn't cook much, but he's excellent at crafting simple, filling pasta dishes that are good for the soul (so to speak). Also treats it as an excuse to drink plenty of the good wine stashed away in the abbey's cellars - blame Terzo for that habit. Favorite meal is fresh pappardelle served with roasted tomatoes, basil and spicy sausage.
Rain doesn't cook if it involves more than the microwave, not because he can't but because he prefers to be waited on. Breakfast in bed, charcuterie plates in the afternoon, specially prepared dinners to make sure he's kept happy - none of it is necessary, but Rain can't help how much he loves being served. Good thing no one minds giving him the royal treatment. He will also indulge in the odd raw fish during a swim, but only does it beneath the surface, away from prying eyes. Favorite good is soup, any kind, but he prefers brothy ones over thick or creamy styles. If he had to pick a single favorite varitey, it would be miso.
Swiss is only allowed in the kitchen because he's good with a knife. He can burn through prep work like nobody's business, but that's where his skill set ends. He's caused one too many greasefires to he trusted at the stove, and every time he's put something in the oven he's forgotten about it until smoke filled the room and the ghoulettes had to magickally air it out. But he can chop like a food processor, so he gets the knife pass. He's another one that'll eat anything put in front of him, with one exception: eggs. Can't stand them. Favorite foods include red meat served rare, really dark, bitter chocolate and anything with hideous amounts of garlic.
Sunshine is chaos personified in the kitchen. She loves to experiment with flavors and techniques, but has yet to have anything close to a success. Pasta with pesto and pineapple (alliteration is fun), chocolate covered avocado balls (with bacon, because why not), a tuna sandwich made with coconut yogurt instead of mayo (it's healthy!) - these are but a few of the food crimes that have lost her solo access to the kitchens. This girl could burn cereal, and no one wants to see that. She does love to eat though, and will frequently hang out when someone else is cooking so she can sneak bites whatever they're making. Favorite foods include cheese (all kinds), sour candy and all the orchard fresh peaches she can get her hands on.
And for the Papas:
Primo had to learn his way around the kitchen from an early age, thanks to the responsibility of raising his younger brothers falling onto his shoulders. He learned by watching the kitchen staff - a pair of elderly Sisters with so much skill in their gnarled hands that Primo couldn't look away. He never got very good at it, mostly sticking to a handful of reliable dishes that could be made cheap and easily for the three of them. His favorite of the bunch was also the one thing he was best at making - a simple mushroom risotto.
Secondo took to the kitchen like it was second nature, once Primo could trust him to not chop a finger off. Would spend hours poring over cookbooks and learning by doing, eating his own failures so his brothers wouldn't have to. He really enjoyed making simple but hearty comfort foods, lots of rib-sticking braises and stews filled with herbs and veggies from Primo's modest garden. He even cooked the last meal they ever shared together, on that fateful Uno night. It was his favorite, a lasagna constructed from fresh sheets of pasta, homemade ricotta, spinach and a simple tomato sauce, served with roasted garlic focaccia.
Terzo did not get the cooking gene, aside from being able to boil water for his tea. It wasn't a big deal since his brothers picked up the slack, and he decided there were other things that took priority - like music, history and how to retain a full head of hair after age 30. He preferred drinking over eating anyway, mostly saw food as something to put in his stomach to cushion the wine. He was a man of simple tastes, and his favorite thing was a humble sandwich of mortadella, provolone and spicy pickled peppers.
Copia never had to learn to cook, raised by the Clergy and doted on thanks to a not-so-subtle suggestion from Sister Imperator. More than a little spoiled in that sense, he would also go on to be the most worldly Papa in terms of his tastes. So much time spent traveling the world helped to expand his palate, and he got into the habit of sending pictures and descriptions of his favorites back to the abbey so the kitchen staff could figure out how to replicate them. It's impossible for him to pick a favorite, but thanks to so much time spent in LA he does have a real soft spot for Mexican food. Tacos al pastor in particular, but without the cilantro (he has the soap gene).
#miasma's work#the band ghost ficlets#technically headcanons but omfg its so long it might as well be a fic#aeon ghoul#aether ghoul#alpha ghoul#aurora ghoulette#cirrus ghoulette#cumulus ghoulette#dewdrop ghoul#ifrit ghoul#mist ghoulette#mountain ghoul#omega ghoul#rain ghoul#swiss ghoul#sunshine ghoulette#papa emeritus i#primo emeritus#papa emeritus ii#secondo emeritus#papa emeritus iii#terzo emeritus#papa emeritus iv#copia#thats so many tags but its 1am and i had the time lmfao#anyway i love cooking and food a whole bunch can u tell#no one will read this but it still makes me happy so OH WELL
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Iâve never felt so conflicted about a franchise in my life but at least this dude was hot
#I watched conquering the demons and demons strike back at 3am last night and I have to say I like the first one more#but not by a lot#like I wanted so much to like this movie#but fucking Duan manâŠ#like I read the plot beforehand so I wouldnât be caught off guard by anything but DAMN that SA scene was sooo much worse watching it#girl this is not the girlboss pussy slay move you think it is queen#I liked her character so much too before that cuz sheâs so cool but the unconsented captive fuck or die foreplay was NOT the move#then she had the nerve to rip up sanzangâs book and turn to us and be like you know what I think I still have a chance - GIRL HES RUNNING#then they had the nerve to make him fall in love with her anyway boy you a VICTIM#then the second one just had [redacted] in it and I did not enjoy looking at his face for two hours - ruined the whole experience#also I have to say that was the worst iteration of Sanzang Iâve ever seen I was actually happy when I thought wukong was boutta kill him#I talk all this shit but I really did like the effects and monster designs in the movie they were so cool#also I thought the first sanzang actor was sooo cute and pathetic why didnât they keep him đ#well itâs for the best I wouldnât wanna have seen him turn abusive like they wrote him in the second movie#also dsb is the only movie in which I can understand the wukong and tripitaka shippers cuz that ENDING SCENE yeah I saw it#oh right my tags sorry lol#digital art#my art#journey to the west#jttw sun wukong#conquering the demons#demons strike back#sun wukong#also his glowup in between movies is so funny lmfao#if you couldnât accept him at his conquering the demons you donât deserve him at his demons strike back#at least dsb gave me this human version of wukong please sir just one chance just one sniff-
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i've seen a lot of dp fans in the dpxdc fandom talk about not having access to comics so here. it's completely free, good quality scans (for most things), basically any dc comic you could want is there. you should have an adblocker but the ads aren't the worst if you don't, just noticeable and annoying. you're not gonna get a virus, i've been using the site for years, as have many other fans.
if you genuinely want to read the comics, take advantage of the sites comic fans have been using. there's new and old stuff and everything in between. crossovers too. whatever you want to read, you'll find there.
#it was genuinely surprising to see people talk about inaccessibility and cost of comics here#like ik most of you arent dc fans but i was still surprised#literally everyone in the dc fandom knows about this and uses it regularly#i just forgot that people who arent comics fan wouldnt know about the free comic sites lol#new runs are updated too! its not just the old stuff!#so no you dont need a comic store or a shit ton of money to read the comics#dpxdc#if we're talking movies and shows then use fmovies#DEF use an adblocker (and vpn if you have one) for that though#and since this is directed at dp fans id highly suggest watching the bat.man scooby doo crossover!#its amazing and imo is a great example of mixing bat.man with a more comedic child friendly vibe#bat.man is so goofy in that movie i love it aldhg#oh man... thats making me think of dpxdcxsd crossover now...#is the acronym for scooby doo sd? that feels wrong#well anyway if you want to read the comics for free you can lol#remember! the dc fandom has been here for decades! we have all the resources you need!! dont be afraid to look or ask!#and if you dont know where to start reading - just pick your favorite character and find a masterlist made by an obsessed fan#and start there lol#but if anyone wants recs let me know and ill be happy to help :)
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boy in silly sitting positions compilation
#cats#I especially like the last one where he just has one single paw poking out of that box for some reason lol#I still have costumes to post and like a billion other things.... grr... constantly failing at staying active on social media aughh#I think because currently my Main Focus is on trying to get my game done and stuff.. which basically just means sitting and writing all day#so there's not much to post about. Though I know the Good At Social Media thing to do would be to post about the#writing and share progress and talk about the game and characters or whatever to try to build interest or something but that is SOOO weird#to me.. I could maybe get it if it was like a tiny tiny discord groupchat of playtesters with like 5 people in#it.. But something about talking openly about things before they happen is weird to me?? Like presumptuous feeling or something#''oooo guess whats gonna happen LATER!!!'' like.. how do you know.. what if it doesnt. what if you dont finish it. what if its not the way#you think it's going to be. what if something changes. etc. Like I literally avoid movie trailers and game trailers for the same reason ghj#Even if it's not ME doing it it just feels... weird.. Maybe it has to do with my OCD and how I just don't like talking about ''future''#things in Certain Terms. Like if I was going to say ''Oh yeah sure. come over to my house in a few months''. I would have to follow it up#with like ''HOPEFULLY you can come over to my house in a few months'' or 'They'll come over in a few months MOST LIKELY''. Because just#stating that something will happen matter of factly takes for granted like.. what if somehting horrible happens and I DONT have a house#in a few months? or what if something bad happens to me. or to the person coming over? I can't ever DEFINITELY say with 100% certainty#that one could ACTUALLY come to my house in a few months. anything could change. So I have to allot for that in my phrasing. hbjjkn#There are a lot of situations where you're expected to just Assume Things but for some reason that bothers me. My brain literally does not#even Assume the most basic things.. like how do *I* know that just because it's someones birthday that they want to be wished a happy#birthday? what if they dont? everyone is different and has different preferences. I should check with them first. or wait until they public#ly announce that theyre accepting birthday wishes. I have to allot for all 5034859069 rare possibilities at any given time and never take#anything for certain. etc. ghjbjhbh.... ANYWAY.. I have been feeling a bit sick lately as usual.. but still slowly making progress on some#things. Moslty I need to edit costume photos. make sculptures. and work on the game. Going back reading some of the old writing from like#2018 and suprisingly I don't have to change that much of it? In fact I like it mostly. so that's good. I would be very interested if I were#playing the game myself. Though that doesnt mean much since my tastes are so niche lol..#Still really want to clear some of my million tumblr drafts as well... alas and aughh and ooughh and so on and so forth. Between all of my#evil appointments other such things...why cant I have one billion dollar to retire into relaxed hermit artist life of no stressors.. bleas
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not to be insane but Stephanie Brown is so underrated and i really do hate to say its misogyny but. well. It is.
#stephanie brown#batman#spoiler#this WILL get me shot but. steph is everything fanon tim wishes he was#i think i could write a whole dissertation on how if steph was a guy people would love him#like. obviously Some Men In Comics will not be happy with any female characters that aren't background wives or daughters#but this is so apparent with fandom that its kinda. boggling#know i shouldnt read too deep into it bc duke and cas get done dirty as well#(duke and cas are whole other rants. i love them both dearly and i DO think Cas should be Batmans heir bc she is literally the Ideal Fit#while WFA is great but has also reduced peoples perception of Duke to a reader insert that is still learning the ropes instead of like.#the robin gang leader who has been studying since birth to defeat the riddler. who has powers.#duke and cas are kinda insane and deserve that recognition is all so i dont go into another rant)#the way that people are so happy to have the batboys be complicated people (even when they reduce them down to core traits) but not steph#she's always the fun one#her struggle with being a completely average teenager fighting to be recognized and her struggles with self worth gets put to the side#oh for what? waffle jokes? yeah okay#ppl would be dickriding her so hard if she had an actual dick i KNOW it#ppl would be making tiktok mitski edits of her
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argh. This comic writing is taking me way longer than usual. I keep editing things and it doesnât feel right.
#wip#i think I finally got it#The issue is usually plots come to me formed yk#But for this one#I did have a plot but it was more related to Chil having a v bad experience and Mei hearing about it and then him telling her#Not to go thru with her plans to become involved with adventures in a sort of threatening way#So I had that all sketched out and then randomly I decided I wanted more drama#so initially I extended it and had it be that maybe she tried to hug him or something but he reacted Badly bc of his aforementioned shit#But I didnât like that and it felt jarring and sort ofâŠover dramatic. Too much.#So then I got rid of that. And then I was like well maybe he and Mei should actually have a conversation about it#Like he brings it up#So I wrote that and I had him get really mad at her and let that sit around for a minute bc uh-oh thereâs another problem#Seee the issue with doimg multiple rewrites of something is suddenly the part that was initially meant to be the focus. Is not important#Anymore and is actually distracting from the main point#So OK I delete all that and rewrite that to make it less distracting#Still keep the important buildup in that scene but focus on Mei more bc this is a comic thatâs from her pov#Ok ok yeah. I like that. But THEN#UH OH NEW PROBLEM. ! Remember that He gets really mad scene? The one I let sit to go worry about the middle section#Well. Haha. I read the whole comic back again to check for flow and shit#Get to the end#WOW ITS OUT OF CHARACTER AND JARRING. Heâs not mean or anything I just donât think heâd yell in that sort of emotional way?#I got so lost in the sauce I forgot to write good#So now Iâm stuck. Itâs so out of character so obviously I get rid of that problem.#Change it so he does still yell but less and also differently. and also now Mei gets to be pissed tf off#and tied it into several previous comics since I like things to be connected to each other#I think?? I think Iâm happy with it nowâŠbut Jesus Christ#I donât usually have to do Any rewrites#And the number of other comics I want to do is piling up so I take breaks to sketch those out for later#Then return. To my undoing.
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