#oh god im so upset
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starting to think that this might actually be real trauma memories popping up & not just awful intrusive thoughts like i was hoping it was 😬😔 i feel sick
#not going super into detail bc its heavy & i dont rly want y’all to have to read all that#but like#god idk what im gonna do if its true#my world is shattering around me#i thought he’d been so good to me & had always had my best interests in mind#i thought he was safe#but he wasnt & thats becoming more and more clear#im spiraling so hard#what do i even do like#im still so close to him i spent so long rebuilding this relationship#only to realize this#oh god im so upset#if anyone has tips on handling the fact that someone u trust turned out to be one of ur main abusers & probably the reason u have did lmk 🙃#cutievents
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ii16 spoilers 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥
#i literally made this in like 20 minutes#im gonna pretend like i didnt go on a 7 month hiatus Hi inanimate insanityers!#ohhhh my god im not normal. im actually not normal.#holy shit#ohhhhh my goddd#inanimate insanity#ii#ii16#ii 16 spoilers#inanimate insanity 16#inanimate insanity 16 spoilers#ii spoilers#inanimate insanity spoilers#adding every spoiler tag cuz this is like. a big spoiler#ii suitcase#ii knife#steve cobs#ii steve cobs#my art#dahlia.png#IM DONE IM SO DONE ITS SO JOEVER OH MY GODDDDDDDDD#WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY ARENT REAL#WHY ARE PICKLE AND OJ AND (presumably) NICKEL DEAD WHAT THE FUCKKKKKKK#2022 me wouldve been so upset over ojs death its not even funny
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siren
#bakuspecial#cw: nudity#cw: body horror#monster#siren! I think. they're bird to me#I think this has been brewing since that stream mim did of drawing dnd monsters only from official text description#and when the official art for the sirens were shown I was like. oh thats just a woman with wings#lmao like. granted. its an official dnd book available for all audience. you cant make it too Bad To Look At#(I do not agree with this but it wasnt about me. if its about me its gonna be about very few people lmao)#but yeah. after that I got slightly too into the idea of putting more bird into birdwoman#but I also do genuinely love monsters that are Rearranged Human Parts so. I couldnt commit too much to the bird scales Im so sorry#I wanted the fleshiness. the feel. textural experience of holding her hands and being like oh that's a human#even when ur eyes tell u otherwise. mmm#...I looked to my right as I was typing these tags and saw. the fucked up pikmin I tried to sculpt the other day along with the pin#and got startled#its so. its so fucked up. gods. dusty white naked grainy parsnip#I used to have that one doll I butchered wanting to customize in a box next to me and thats way less upsetting than this. man#its perfect actually I will never throw this thing away. anyways#now. now I go to bed. its sleep time for the baku#have a good night lads! you CAN have it both way easily you just need a big bat
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are you oka- oh.
#kamo noritoshi#noritoshi kamo#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#yandere kamo noritoshi#yandere noritoshi kamo#yandere jujutsu kaisen#NO CAUSE HE WOULD COVER HIS MASSIVE DEATH GLARE IF HE KNEW YOU WOULD DEFEND THE OTHER PERSON#THEN YOUR ASS LOOKS AWAY AND BRO IS SHOOTING DAGGERS DUDE#i really like kamo#hes so babygirl#kamo has the hugest bitch face. i know it. i know he gives it out when the situation is fucking brutal.#its like the death glare someone else's momma gave you as a kid when you were bad#like bro#🧎♂️ damn im sorry#but in my mind he'd cover his face so you wouldnt be exposed to the death glare#smth smth only wanting you to see his perfect good boy self he crafted specifically for you smth smth#hed rather die than see you defend someone whos not him bc he doesnt want to compete for your attention. he feels it should belong to him#but it only makes the contrast of the peek that he gives others that much hotter. i mean scary#also tell me how you peeped the color change god please#i was so cool for that#the pink one.. your pov. hes double face palming.... at smth someone said/did. oh no!!#but for others its red. death glare. hes gonna make them regret upsetting him so much around you#to the point where he had to take his attention away from you for a second. not only that but your attention away from him too#wow kamo ur so. hot#stan kamo fr bro 🤟#null rot
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he is the dirt under my fingernails
#just a bunch of kons ive drawn over a time period#when im upset i draw him woopeee#snyways look @ my hcs boy#i hold unhealthy ass kon rlly close 2 my heart u dont understand ots so stupid#CAN U TELL WHEN U DRAW YOUNGER KON?? I RLLY HOPE SO PLS TELL ME U DO#kfjfoksnsnnngngngn hhhhhhhhhhhh#ive paniking all night staring @ the figure outside my window#now its afternoon & I CANT SLEEEEPPP tehehe#y doesnt melotinon melon mel something WORKKK#call back 2 the time i took a whole bottle of those tablets & stayed up 2 dayd that was weird#im rambling in my tags again mooommmm#yk what would b a good idea? taking my meds#imma do that yeah#kon el#kontent#U GET A TAG#konmen pls accept me as a konartist pls oh god#pls dont eat me alive#puppee art#oh hint of kart in there ofc bc im insane#i ordered stuff 4 etsy((i think idk if i did it correct)) & im working on buttons((FINALLY AGAIN))#me? doing work outside of work? insnae. its mot work im just drawing kon & bart send help#i need 2 shut up im so tired wikihow how 2 sleep
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thoughts on dave and aradia (<>)?
day 356
BIG fan tbh. in this house we love and respect timerails
truly yall read this log and tell me theyre not cute
#day 356#year 4#dave strider#aradia megido#aradave#homestuck#she really saw this kid and was like OH YOU HAVE ISSUES WITH YOUR MORTALITY?? :D#boy do i have some relevant life experience and wisdom to impart on THAT ISSUE SPECIFICALLY#and then she just. very gently and kindly makes the subject more approachable for ghostdave#the pesterlog i linked is literally my FAVORITE aradia moment. to me it is THE character defining moment for god tier aradia#yes she is being kind of ominous and trickstery at first#but it VERY quickly becomes clear shes got genuine concern for this kid she's had very little to do with up until this point#she really wants to connect with him over their shared time aspect stuff#and she really DOES care about how he feels about everything. she wants to help and she wants to put him at ease#because she KNOWS from experience that being dead and having to cope with what that means for you is like VERY UPSETTING AND TRAUMATIC#shes not just like. 'hee hee i think death is great and awesome because im edgy'#shes like 'no dude being dead is scary if you dont have anybody to explain this shit to you. so im going to explain it-'#'-and hopefully by the end of this conversation you will have some new things to feel relief and maybe even joy and excitement about'#'not just in spite of the death thing but BECAUSE of it'#i know shes spooky and has weirdgirl swag and we all love that about her but like#at her core she is a very KIND person. she may occasionally struggle to connect to people through the Death Special Interest Haze#but she WANTS to and when she DOES she is like. a genuinely very warm and comforting presence for her friends#ANYWAY. if andrew hussie or i guess james roach now want to give me an honorary doctorate for my 12+ years of intensive aradia studies#i will be here waiting patiently#timerails
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Re-watching wakfu for the first time in years and s1 Yugo was so silly???
dude discovered he could make portals at will and his first thought after actually acknowledging it is "i can do so many cool pranks with this"
#he was just a kid..... guys he was just a kid....#HE WAS SO SILLY#also the fact that after eva told him they used to call amalia princess gobball he just laughs at it ☠️#was he 12? i think he was in s1#why dont they ever celebrate characters bdays tho#thinking over it now there was little to no chill time for these guys#sure there was a good amount of non plot stuff to get to know the characters but like#idk? ummm like in the first ova they gave them some chill time and i wish they had done that more#s4 was an amalgamation of “FUCK NOT AGAIN JFC”#OH ACTUALLY#there was (1) episode with chill time and i loved it#despite having gone thru alot of effort to be like look!!! chibi and grougal!!! theyre bros!!! yugo spent like. 5 minutes of screentime#with them. like actually being their brother.#and like it was kinda funny because imagine like the world sorta blowing up a little and then ur child comes back just to say#'dad im rlly fucking upset. ive been to the house of the gods btw. and i met my mom.'#alibert mustve been so fkn confused hdhdbd#then again. its like. average shit for his son#alibert went from gay dad with his lil guy from a species he does not know of who basically works a farm inn to like#a literal demigod. he def has made some enemies#i remember the most abt yugo bec the hyperfix was strongest on him#current thoughts on the others in the brotherhood:#tristepin: yugos nickname did not translate well into en lmao. also my guy pls stop harrassing women?? he gets an arc ik but like. my guy.#yes specifically s1 them#amalia: i mean. she does in fact act like a spoiled 13 yr old. but like. girl they did u kinda dirty.#eva: they also did you kinda dirty. love that your the only one just sick of everyones logic defying shit.#ruel: yk what. no notes. that is the most realistic old man ive ever seen. hes hilarious#az: this mf gets his ass in trouble every five seconds. u can tell he grew up with yugo. also according to s4 he gets bitches so XD#wu's rewatch notes#thats what im calling this#wakfu
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one of those 'peter in gotham' aus except lex fucking luthor is the one that finds him. Can you imagine the shenanigans. peter accidentally goes through a portal and lands in the outskirts of metropolis where luthor just so happens to have a factory doing Something. and luthors employees find him and go to luthor like Hey boss,, Umm. theres a teenager in the grass. luthors like, what happened? cue the factory workers going i dont know! the kid jsut fell out of this weird portal thing! and hes like,,, Hm.
superman definitely should be relevant but i still want the batfamily to meet peter. can you imagine that luthors kryptonite reserves were discovered and confiscated. and theres some discovered in gotham, whether it be naturally discovered there or someones like, selling it? and so thats how peter gets sent to gotham? although i cant see luthor letting him loose on the big wide world without some insurance, because hes definitely obscuring some of the facts from peter in order to manipulate him.
hmmm maybe luthor traps peter in a deal that peter cant easily get out of (at the cost of his or someone elses safety) so that even when peter Does discover how bad luthor is, he cant just bail out. idk i just think its very funny how every single person peter is vaguely acquainted with turns out to be a supervillain. or somehow personally wronged by him. and i think that should extend beyond universes.
#should i write this.#after peter finds out luthor is The Worst he officially swears off billionaires and then-#-bruce tries to talk to him as Bruce Wayne and peters internally like: oh god not fucking again. are you kidding me. im cursed#peter @ bruce: btw if you turn out to be the next coming of like. The Antichrist im going to be pretty upset. so dont do that#bruce: ? yeah. Okay. [internally: he needs help . Guidance. A F]#dick‚ stopping suddenly and looking around suspiciously: something just happened.#(jason in the background: what the fuck are you- ohshit. what the hell. What the hell just happened]#dc#dc x marvel#dc x mcu#peter parker#batfamily#batfam#lex luthor#spiderman#bruce wayne
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if you crash the bike Qiu gives you his bandana. as a bandaid. crying
#im so upset /pos oh my god. Qiu Lin ily.#hes so sweet :(#just a baby boy#beverly says stuff#ol:nf#our life#our life now and forever#qiu lin#our life qiu
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"...I would go to the ends of the earth and back for you. I would die for you.
And now I don't know what it means. If it means anything."
#NOOOOOOOOO#IM SO UPSET#WE WERE SO HAPPY 6 EPISODES AGO#FIRST IT WAS LAURANCE BEING SO INSENSITIVE#NOW#NOW ITS THIS#woah aer talks?#aphmau#minecraft diaries#mcd#minecraft diaries aphmau#aphmau mcd#aphmau minecraft diaries#mcd aphmau#garroth ro'meave#mcd garroth#garroth mcd#laurance zvahl#mcd laurance#laurance mcd#AND IT WAS VOICE ACTED TOO.#IM STRESSED THE FUCK OUT.#OH MY GOD AND ON THE EPISODE CALLED ''Garroth''#THIS IS SO UPSETTING#HIS VOICE CATCHING ON THAT FIRST ''for you''#STOP#I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE#''I was such an idiot.'' NOOOOO YOU AREN'T PLEASE COME BACK#MY HEART PLEASE#aer's revisiting block game roleplays
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I, Carrion (Icarian) by Hozier // Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir
#im so upset about her rn. oh my god.#gideon nav#gideon the ninth#the locked tomb#hozier#trb.txt#tlt thoughts#imgs have alt text#suicide mention ////#gideon the ninth is a CORRUPTION ARC
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Apparently I don’t mask well at all and I’m just giving straight up autism and not manic pixie dream girl. Day ruined
#girlblogging#girlhood#hell is a teenage girl#just girly things#this is what makes us girls#tumblr girls#beauttiful girls#im just a girl#this is a girlblog#lana is god#autism#actually autistic#i’m just a girl#girl rage#lizzy grant#girl interrupted#manic pixie dream girl#devine feminine#female hysteria#lana del slay#i’m in loooove#oh i love being a woman#i need a lobotomy#lana del rey#i’m unwell#i’m upset#i’m so tired#I’m so over#day ruined
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i've downloaded zombies run & i'm three missions in & enjoying it so far, but it's also so Tragically and Hilariously clear how much this story was written in 2012. and how it was also less interested in subverting genre expectations than making you move your body (very fair!! given that that's what the game is designed for!!)
the two most egregious things in these first three eps are:
1. i was paired for a run with a coughing woman who insists she "just has a bad chest cold," and even though the camp supervisor firmly establishes that coughing is THE FIRST SYMPTOM of an infection, i'm instructed to go out running alone in the wilds with this lady. who's coughing. so much.
she keeps being like "it's just a cold 💕" while refusing to let anyone examine her and i'm like. YOU GUYS DONT HAVE QUARANTINE PROCEDURES?? PUT HER ASS SOMEWHERE AWAY FROM THE REST OF US?? DUDE??
2. it's then established that everyone at the camp is suspicious of me because other camps nearby have been torched after being visited by shady-ass secret-keepers very similar to myself. but i'm still allowed to roam around and do supply runs like it's nothing. the NPCs just mutter mutinously about me and make allusions to how i'm gonna get everyone killed.
PUT MY ASS IN QUARANTINE?!?!? DON'T LET ME LEAVE WITHOUT ANSWERING QUESTIONS??? WHAT???? YOU GUYS HAVE GOT TO GET A GRIP?!?!?!
the lack of quarantine, safety, and hardass procedures would be excusable if this was a hippie commune or solarpunk future or whatever, but it is Not. this is an AMC's walking dead style deal where the only people more dangerous than the zombies are the non-zombies.
so i'm like.
YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE THE LAST RUGGED BASTION OF HUMANITY. WHAT ARE YOU DOIIINGGG.....
#zombies run#prepare for more posts with that tag if i feel so inclined#YOU CAN'T JUST NOT QUARANTINE PEOPLE IN THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE IM GONNA CRYYY#NOTE: there's ten more years of story and 500 missions. i'm NOT genuinely upset about this or knocking the game.#i'm having fun and looking forward to seeing where future storylines go. i'm just also like Oh My God.
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I spent all my tv time watching the episodes that noritoshi appeared in over and over again literally squealing and kicking my feet whenever noritoshi is on screen that my family is just sick of my shit
Noritoshi scolding abt using indoor voices...... swoons....... He would be so orderly and nagging abt it too... uwaa....... coughs
you and me both, bro. The way Noritoshi presents himself with such grace and stoism is so fucking beautiful, even my ancestors possess me to let out their shock. the way his type of character talks, too, with formalities and like he has an image to uphold... HOW CAN YOU NOT YELL AT THAT. Not only that, but he's so... flowy.... from his clothes to his hair and the way he uses his bow in the fight scenes..
the fight scenes served hella cunt. I love shonen sm. Noritoshi fight scenes are so good.... but stop fucking giving him concussions @ gege
#kamo noritoshi#jjk#noritoshi kamo#jujutsu kaisen#kamo noritoshi x reader#noritoshi kamo x reader#cult leader cameo#im in love#I'll gladly scream w you bro#i remember pointing at the screen and repeating 'there he is!!' while rewatching jjk w my bro#it got the the point that hed scoff when he showed on screen bc he knew id point#you cannot be upset with me though#i love him your honor#???#ragingbisegzual#SO SORRY FOR HOW LONG THIS TOOK BTW. yer cult leader's got things to take care of sometimes to make sure this cult works in proper order#away from the eyes of the feds ofc#also that little dude next to me is how i see you all.. youre a little marshmallow creature with the jjk uniform#that or cult members w hoods but thats not for noritoshi to see so i go w the former#OH BUT DID YOU NOTICE HIM BLUSHING IN THE IMG WHERE HES SHUSHING YOU??#BC EVEN THOUGH HES SHUSHING YOU. HES FLATTERED THAT YOUD GET THAT EXCITED TO SEE SOMEONE LIKE HIM.. NO ONE GETS THAT EXCITED TO SEE HIM..#SO HES CONFLICTED W THE WARM FEELING THATS BLOOMING IN HIS CHEST WHILE ALSO MAKING SURE YOUR VOLUME IS CONTROLLED SO YOU DONT GET IN TROUBL#hence. the blush w a shush#a shush blush#heh#hes so the type to look like he was annoyed by that while also playing that moment over and over again in his head.#CATCH THIS DUDE STARING AT A WALL LOOKING LIKE A DUMBASS/ASLEEP BC HES REPLAYING YOUR EXCITED VOICE OVER AND OVER IN HIS HEAD. YAHOOO#god. fuck
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It’s 4 am, I just finished the main game, I’m now on the epilogue, my makeup is running down my face, I am traumatized and will be reading fanfiction to help cope
#I knew the ending and I still sobbed#oh my god?????#i’m still crying#I’m still upset abt it 😭#fucking so many words for many of the characters#the immediate switch up to the epilogue tho was brutal no time to grieve#I had to pause the game 💀#rdr2#rants#help me im going insane
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btw if i make kaveh say "oh my god" pls imagine him say that EXACTLY the way his english VA does bc its always stuck in my head with how funny and perfect it is ajkcjkab
#i dont play in english unless im outside of paimon scenes bc i carry deep hatred for her english voice#(its bc of my misophonia she just immediately triggers it fr)#so cn dub supremacy everyone sounds very good and paimon is not screeching ur ears off#but sometimes i play in english and theres always kinda iconic stuff sticking with me i cant get out of my head akjbjkc#kavehs panicked 'WHO ARE THEY??' in haithams sq and his 'oh my god!!' from the event and that stream belongs to that akjbcsk#also haithams very iconic 'KAAAAAAAAAveh' and his unbothered 'see ya' AHA i love his english voice and tone sm#sigh sigh#i really want a volume slider for characters voices i played a game (which i cant remember) where it had this setting where u could adjust#characters voice volumes#the way i would make english paimon shut tf up so i can actually sometimes switch to english for a change in story quests#her pitch and tone is just so extremely upsetting#anw enough english pamon slander in the tags LMFAO#tbd
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