#oh also there were children there so
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why was danny gonzalez in my dream fuckinf bamboo-
#even tho this was a thing 2 years ago i still feel the need to contribute to the danny dream lore#he broke apart and got fixed by doctors twice btw#also it wasnt like he was a person made of bamboo#nah he coukd just transform into a sentient stick of bamboo (sometimes just partially)#also drew was there#he was also bamboo#and so was my friend’s dad for some reason#drew was trying to help amanda un-possess their house aswell#but it had to be done on the other side of the weird tunnel (thats where most of the dream was)#also we were in america but when i saw a bunch of busses they were all scottish (bcz idk what american busses look like)#and yeah it was quite strange#i hugged them a couple times after danny was reformed for a second time#also i picked up his lifeless bamboo corpse one time so yk-#oh also there were children there so#dreams#danny gonzalez#danny gonzalez dream lore
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Hi! Could you draw Miss Peregrine??
It has been a MINUTE since I was in this fandom so hooo boy- I LOVED her when I was a kid lol
I tried to go more by the book description of her but idk how much I like it so here’s more of a doodle- hopefully it’s alright🖤
#art#digital art#digital drawing#fanart#artists on tumblr#miss peregrines home for peculiar children#miss peregrine#miss peregrine book#mphfpc#alma lefay peregrine#alma peregrine#my art#mya draws sometimes#oh alma how I missed you you lovely lady#I really don’t like how I did the face so I’m probably gonna redo this at one point or make it a larger drawing#also you were a quick one how’d you send that so fast after I posted my little thing about her I had one note lol😭
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Honestly fascinated trying to figure out how both of Ambessa's kids ended up being diametrically opposed to her whole jock spartan might-makes-right mentality.
Tthe obvious answer, of course, is that Ambessa's husband (Kino's dad, and the guy Mel thought was her bio dad until recently) was way more of a diplomat and way less of a fighter, both philosophically as well as in terms of skill. And that he's the one who passed this on to the kids.
This fits well enough as an answer. The guy in the portrait certainly looks more like a talker than a fighter, and we know that Ambessa has a thing for pretty, submissive men thanks to her whole introduction in S1. Also, regardless of Mel's genetics this is presumably the man who raised her and is her father in the "nurture" sense of the equation, so it would be completely reasonable for her to take after him.
However, there are a few issues here.
One is the fact that even when Mel is talking to who she thinks is Kino about the possibility of one of them being a bastard, or of a bastard half-sibling existing, neither of them mention their father at all. While I doubt either of them would hold illusions about Ambessa remaining faithful to a spouse (for all we know the guy's still alive while she's off carousing with twinks), you would think that if both kids were close to their dad or took after him particularly, there'd be at least a passing mention of him in the midst of this discussion.
Maybe Mr. Medarda died a long time ago, though. Perhaps it's a topic so buried that it's an established habit to simply never mention it. Or maybe there is an issue of estrangement between him and his children for other reasons. He doesn't seem to have factored into Ambessa's decision to send Mel away, nor is his potential grief brought up around the subject of Kino. Despite confirmation of his existence, he seems (ironically) to be out of the picture, though it could also just be that the writers wanted to leave their options open for what he might be like in case another Arcane-adjacent series comes into production. I am fairly sure that Mel is the most likely character from Arcane to create continuity into a show about Noxus or Demacia or something, if we get another LoL series, especially since her story feels the most unfinished.
However, there's another possibility, which is that Mr. Medarda up there was such a nonentity in his kids lives that he doesn't come up because there's not much of a relationship to acknowledge. In which case, even if he is more of a diplomat (and he and Ambessa were a political marriage, presumably?) it'd be hard to credit him with influencing the kids so significantly.
One of the interesting things about Mel and Kino is that even though they are at odds with their mother on a lot of topics, topics that even seem to tie into prevailing Noxian cultural ideals (so, things they'd have been overall raised to believe in by the rest of their house and not just their mother too), they are also kind of astonishingly confident in expressing themselves?
So, somebody must have been supporting their alternative viewpoints and validating them as opinions worth expressing, even if they weren't things Ambessa approved of or actually wanted to foster in them as opinions/philosophies.
I think an interesting option is that it was Ambessa herself who did this, actually.
Ambessa's lore mentions that she figured out really early on that Kino did not share her temperament at all. Also, that she started searching about for ways of ensuring not only her house's domination, but the survival of her children specifically. Because the succession in a Noxian noble house doesn't seem to be guaranteed by birthright, which means that Kino and Mel would probably face rivals from their own family if they seemed too weak or vulnerable to lead, and someone else contested it. An easy way to remove a "weak" leader would also be to just kill them off. That's even apart from external rivals (like the ones who actually did kill Kino).
Which means that even if her kids had different values and priorities, Ambessa would probably have wanted them to still present those opinions with ferocity and confidence. If they cower to her, they will cower to others, and that's worse than them just not being aggressive combatants or warlord types. If you're gonna be a peacenik weirdo (by Ambessa's standards) in Noxus then you better damn well still be an assertive one.
I like this idea partly because the image of Ambessa trying to balance her kids having totally alien opinions about things like the value of life and importance of compassion, with trying not to actually beat down their spirits about it. Just spending a lot of their formative years being like, ugh, I have to listen to my nerd ass loser children tell me why they think mercy is a good idea. Such a fucking chore. Anyway great job presenting your arguments kids, lots to think about, let's go get ice cream. Then Mother has to fire one of your military tactics instructors for daring to call you a couple of wieners. Again. Even though she's right.
#arcane#arcane spoilers#mel medarda#ambessa medarda#kino medarda#long post#ambessa just being mystified about why this keeps happening like how come BOTH kids turned out like this???#also the possibility that she looked at her literal infants and was like 'oh no they have no killer instincts AT ALL'#accidentally nurtured her kids to be more compassionate because she didn't realize that being hardcore almost from birth is weird#tfw you were a freaky kid and your society has a lot of pretenses so you mistake normal child behaviors for some kind of inherent weakness#'the children cried when I showed them a dead body this is bad people are gonna make fun of them'
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I used to despise Eridan and think he was the absolute worst character (barring Cronus ig) but you have shown me the light and completely turned my opinion around and now I think he is such an endearing little freak <3 I read your whole blog already but if you've got any more thoughts on eri or anyone else then I hope you post them bc I'd love to hear more abt it!
i have sooo many controversial opinions about the dancestors you have noooooo idea
#always glad to have another person go 'oh eridan's not that bad huh'#like he IS a freak and there is SO MUCH thats wrong with him#but he's supposed to be an antagonist AND sympathetic AND funny AND pathetic AND tragic#like all these things can be true hes just a complex character#same w a lot of them#vriska equius and gamzee all kind of fall into this boat#yes there is a lot thats wrong with them but they are also 13#let he who was not a shithead at 13 cast the first stone#anyway ive been hesitant about talking about the dancestors because if my eridan opinions are controversial...#but the tl;dr is that almost all of them suck horribly#like collectively they are the worst characters in homestuck and thats on purpose#bc their role in the story is villainous like theyre the reason lord english even exists#if the alternian trolls as a rule are meant to be sympathetic even if they have a lot of problems#then the beforus trolls are like a worst case scenario of 'what if they never address their problems and grow up that way'#theyre the counterpoint to the comics themes of being a kid and growing up#learning to care about each other and become responsible#the beforus trolls are children who never grew up#going through the exact same problems and drama as when they were children#because they never took responsibility for their own actions or their treatment of each other#And That's Terrible
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not speirs looting all that shit because he had a newborn child back in london and was worried his wife wouldnt be able to survive on his salary alone………
#LIKE??? its so tragic oh my god????? the real life stories are ao much more interesting than whats portrayed in the show#if the audience had known it would have given him so much more depth#he was literally sending everything he looted back to london apparently#also nixon had a newborn as well but was cheating on his wife with a british woman#these men were BUSY lmao#and roe got married while on leave too during 1944#these women somehow never mentioned!!!! the children never mentioned !!#ronald speirs#real people#band of brothers
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I’m on board with the “Adar was/is Celeborn” theory purely because I want this crack exchange -
Adar/Celeborn: You cheated on me with Sauron!
Galadriel: Well you also cheated on me with Sauron so the scales are balanced
Adar/Celeborn: What?? In what-
Galadriel: You left me, your wife, for 1000 years, to have a family and children with him
Adar/Celeborn: Okay, well, you fell in love with him. Which means you weren’t even in love with me in the first place. Which is worse
Galadriel: YOU LITERALLY HAD HIS CHILDREN
Adar/Celeborn: You married me for all eternity wiTHOUT EVEN BEING IN LOVE WITH ME
High King Gil-Galad, to Elrond: Still think he’s fake and they’re not married?
Elrond: Oh no, I take it back, they’re definit- oh my god Galadriel do not challenge him to a duel there is nothing wrong with your womb gods above
#Galadriel: HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHAT LOVE FELT LIKE IT ONLY HAPPENS ONCE#Adar/Celeborn: Well apparently it feels like a scruffy lost king that doesn’t even EXIST#Galadriel: MY children wouldn’t have stabbed you to death#Adar/Celeborn: SHUT UP#my desire to turn rings of power into a comedy is strong#it also legitimately feels like the only path where you don’t feel bad for Celeborn#because they both abandoned the other for Sauron#and they both are equally obsessed with killing him#also Adar was way way too weird around Galadriel for it to be normal#and you can’t set up and feed an entire relationship between the two just to kill him#they were literally more interesting than all the Galadriel Elrond stuff#the parallels and mutual understanding#who better to help her heal from the darkness infecting her than someone who was also changed by Saurons darkness#it also means you get both Celeborn and Sauron in the story without forfeiting the relationship Galadriel has with either#rop spoilers#rop season 2#rop#galadriel#galadriel/sauron#galadriel/halbrand#gil galad#elrond#sauron#adar rings of power#rings of power#celeborn#adar#oh context elves can only fall in love once#so Galadriel cannot have been in love before if she fell for Halbrand#which is a huge yikes for Celeborn lmao
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There's something so bittersweet about the childhood flashbacks in tua. They were all children together. Reginald was horrible, but they had each other. And then everything went to shit. Five's 13 year old body a bitter reminder of what once was. His siblings in their adult bodies a reminder of how things should've been. God,,,,
#and now they're so different#they have so little in common ):#Five came back to a family that he no longer knew and who no longer knew him#they can never go back#Five's lived half a lifetime without them#its never going to be the same#Five's also the only one of them who kept the number name which makes him more of a reminder of the past he's like a relic of a lost time#i'm rewatching s1 rn and oh man#it hurts so bad Five should've grown up with them#ben should've lived#god the tragedy of it all#they were children together </3#the umbrella academy#tua s1#tua season 1#tua#umbrella academy#luther hargreeves#diego hargreeves#allison hargreeves#klaus hargreeves#ben hargreeves#five hargreeves#viktor hargreeves#tua s2#tua s3#tua season 2#tua season 3#mine#tua meta
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I wonder if the mural of Vander already existed and someone else painted Jinx into it after she became so well regarded?
I just feel like the portraits aren't that well integrated in theme. You have Vander's profile bordered in yellow flowers to represent friendship and joy. Then you have the more detailed painting of Jinx looming over Piltover exploding it with smoke bombs. Jinx is framed around doves while stylized into her latest attacks.
It feels like the artist(s) wanted to associate Jinx with Vander rather than the other way around because the actual subject of the Jinx's portion of the mural is Jinx violently provoking Piltover, but the nature of Jinx's portion is practically whitewashed to make it work with Vander's theme to the point Jinx is surrounded by DOVES. It might be an attempt to harmonize Jinx's persona with the ideals Vander left behind, which are the complete opposite of what Jinx is actually doing.
I think this is on purpose because Jinx is the most politically relevant member of her family now. Jinx is the one being valorized and venerated, and EVERYONE knows none of this would have been possible without Silco. Silco was the one who dedicated his resources to train Jinx and was openly anti-Piltovan to Jinx and the rest of Zaun.
I've seen some claims that Vander and Jinx are together because Vander was more beloved than Silco. But Silco never made it illegal to mourn or even celebrate Vander's memory. Silco allowed and a giant statue of Vander to be built in the middle if Zaun and he'd TALK to it.
But now Silco's dead and there are people running around in the background wearing Jinx's X and Silco's color scheme on their clothes. It feels like there's an ideological custody battle on behalf Silco and Vander through their supporters on who was Jinx's "true" father and gets the lions share of historical parental acclaim.
Tldr: The mural seems more like an effort to save face for Vander rather than bolster Jinx because Vander's actual values inexplicably lead his KNOWN favorite to becoming an enforcer. Meanwhile, everyone knows, especially Silco's supporters, that Silco's responsible for how Jinx turned out, and she's currently Zaun's favorite.
#arcane#arcane meta#jinx arcane#silco#vander arcane#i think the mural also whitewashes Vander's own history too#everyone goes on about the Hound of the Underground and he hangs cast irons still stained in blood#even foreign pirates know what he's done#vander was a violent man and in mamy ways still WAS a violent man bcuz he ran a protection racket on Zaun#he's only peaceful compared to the new guy who violently overthrew him and tried to murder all his children#and sure there were people who clearly tried to fight against Silco's regime#but it's very clear many people (not just the chembarons) benefited from Silco's leadership#and now vander supporters probably saw vi came back got excited then noticed she was running around w/ enforcers#a kiramman no less#so now they're thinking “oh god not only is vander dead but his favorite kid is an enforcer that everyone hates”#“and Silco's favorite is the one everyone loves”#time for some historical revisionism to save some face for vander in the afterlife
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it still fucks me up that fuyuhiko and peko were literally kidnapped as children. i dont think anyone ever talks about that at all. is that even well known information
#probably gonna draw something related to this??#sorry. sometimes i like to read his wiki from time to time and im just like. Oh.#this guy is fucked up. we been knew but Damn#it doesnt say how young he was when that happened to him#but since it emphasizes they were children and also he hasnt cried since second grade (and he cried in those mountains)#then he was like. eight years old?#god DAMN thats so sad. imagine what happened to them dude#thats gotta impact him for a long time. and he NEVER TALKS ABOUT IT!!!#sorry im full of thoughts. maybe this is nothing. i just heart fuyuhiko. poor guy#i feel like he never ever had a chance to fully process his trauma#until literally like. after the game . way later hes able to think about it#rambling#fuyuhiko kuzuryu#danganronpa
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mother of mine
#my art#homestuck#jade harley#wq#also really proud of this one#everything just came together really nicely :D#it makes me illlll#more people should think about jade and the carapacians#actually everything surrounding prospit and jade makes me ill oh my god#her corpse in the attic constantly aware that her second life (persay) is going to die and just having to Deal with it. she just has to let#go of prospit where she had people comma friends#who love you comma or more so worship you#and being utterly aware of the fact of how alien you are#i’m wording this poorly but you get it#ONE DAY i’ll make a post about it that explains my thoughts waaaay better#also somethingsomething prospits first mother <i cannot remember for the life of me if#there were carapacian children (in like the game session time line)
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On a scale of one to ten how emotional was readers reaction seeing megumi alive again
8.7 but she never really believed that he was gone. call her crazy but her son isn’t going to blindly submit to some manic gym bro from the heian era
megumi takes back his body and she’s basically jumping up and down with yuji and applauding. a standing ovation for her son, obviously.
and then later she goes home and cries herself to sleep because a. she’s really proud of him and b. the world is a terrible terrible place
#i mean she could potentially cry in front of him#but i feel as though she absolutely HATES being upset in front of the children and after ten years she’s learned how to control her emotion#in the moment#definitely a bittersweet feeling#but no#when people were like ‘if megumi does blah blah—‘ she would interrupt and 🤓☝️ ‘WHEN he does blah blah’#and yuji is wholeheartedly agreeing#nodding along#she’s also like… probably fighting for her life in the moment??? so she can’t be super dramatic#but using that as ammunition for the rest of their lives for sure#and her and megumi go home and talk about gojo and tsumiki#they were always very close but it brings them together for sure#and i think it gives megumi the same kind of perspective that she gained when she was a kid and her friends died/left#so a loooot of understanding going on#but hey#they’ve got each other so it’ll all be alright#(and then megumi and yuji make out and take seven years to confess to each other)#jjk spoilers#a typical family#OH#AND she definitely talks to megumi about guilt#about not taking it all alone#they could’ve saved everyone together but they weren’t strong enough#because you can never be strong enough#and she tells him that it’s okay#that’s why strength exists in the first place#(aka not letting him go down your typical satoru route)
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anyways, i'm just dropping by to say fuck jk rowling and that snape being romantically in love with lily is really stupid when it would be more narratively and thematically consistent (and, frankly, more compelling) if his love for her was familial
#harry potter#hp#severus snape#lily evans#lily potter#anyway when i first read the series i interpreted it as platonic and found it deeply moving#and then i entered the online fandom space and everyone elses read was... vastly different than mine#come on though!#like juxtaposition between severus and petunia who both in their own way loathed lily's son??#and likely for tragically similar and yet different reasons#and his patronus being a doe? well hey guess what the only other times two people have shared the EXACT SAME patronus#(not just matching or representing)#its been between close family members#(based on what i know from the original books. idgaf about recent material to be frank)#also. they were childhood best friends who stopped associating in their mid teens#whether he had a childhood crush on her or not (and i favor not)#can we PLEASE just let that love be innocent and pure?#they were literally children so like why do some people talk about it like it was something weird and disturbing#?????#like oh no how dare you have a crush on your childhood best friend and then grow up to still care about her#shame on you! for shame!!
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Giving a complicated tragic childhood backstory to your favorite character is all fun and games, until you realize you need to account for how old all the other adult characters would have been at the time and realize that scenes that would work perfectly if one character was twenty three and the other was fourteen stop working when you need other characters who are played by adult actors clearly younger than they are to be in college at the same time so your story beats line up thematically.
#Don't worry. I made an excel document for this over a year ago#Was that unhinged? Yeah. But this is harder than you think it is#In unrelated news it is now reasonable to have a child in your 20s 30s or 40s depending on when the plot needs the child#Also people in their early 20s can be in grad school have already established careers and adopt children now. I've declared it.#Also: Hollywood stop trying to trick me into believing women in their 30s are the same age as men in their 50s. It's never gonna work.#I'm fighting for my life to make these age gaps normal even on a platonic level#Don't worry I aged the girls up and the boys down#But still this is a bit ridiculous#If you use the actors' ages it doesn't work. Garrison's actress is 16 years younger than Curtain. Why?#I mean I like the casting. But SQ is a teenager. We know Curtain has had his evil plans at least since SQ was born and lost his bio dad#and if the Whisperer is Garrison's invention that means she and Curtain were working together when SQ was born#If SQ in the show is 16 (the actor was older I believe) and Garrison is 37 (that's how old the actress is now she was younger at time)#That means Garrison was only 21 and Curtain was well into his 30s. And that's after you age SQ down and Garrison up for the calculations#So Garrison was likely (according to the shows' casting) even younger than that which begs the question what was Curtain doing?#Was he spending his 30s lurking around college campuses and high schools looking for a kid whose inventions he could steal?#What in the Marcus Cutter is that about?#All these jokes about Garrison being SQ's uninvolved divorced stepmom but nah she's really his estranged big sister#also this is very frustrating because the irl age gap between the actress who plays Number Two and Tony Hale only 7 years#but they're the ones for whom a 16 year age gap would have actually made sense because he adopts her in the books!#but now since Garrison is clearly so much younger than Number Two Curtain and Benedict I have to deal with this#(Don't worry I figured it out and made the age gaps normal. You just now have to believe Number Two is only a year older than Garrison)#It was the stress of living with her family that aged her and Garrison just looks naturally super young that's what we're going with.#And don't get me wrong:#I do like the actresses and actors they casted they're great but sometimes I google the ages and I'm like oh you cannot be serious#But we've (more or less) figured it out#Rant over#writing#writing struggles#tmbs
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The Doctor needs one of those classes they give to expecting/hopeful parents but for humans. Get their ass enrolled in a parenting course. And everytime they get a new companion he has to retake the course.
#doctor who#dw#the doctor#inspired by the deleted scene of her just pushing amy out of the tardis doors into space#while amy was having an anxiety attack. YOU CANNOT DO THAT!#they have access to all of time and space the doctor has to be able to find a human parenting/caretaker course#bonus points if he ends up taking one for human children.#imgine youre travelling with the doctor and he leaves and comes back one day and says they enrolled themself in a human management course#and youre like 'oh thank god finally'#and then she just starts bubble wrapping the entire tardis and locking off entire rooms and giving you coloring sheets and stim toys#when you get bored#and starts taking you to like. fucking parks to play with other humans.#and starts carrying like fucking snacks like lunchables and shit everywhere and giving them to you at regular intervals#and you're like 'hey what the fuck.'#and you ask them what the hell they're doing and you find out they were learning to care for human TODDLERS.#and you're like. jesus fucking christ. explains so much. mildly disconcerting how much stayed the same though.#and so obviously you ask 'do you see me as a child?' and the doctor is like. ah. interesting question.#you know what else is interesting. OOOOOOO TELETUBBIES LETS LOOK AT THE TELETUBBIES OOOOOO EDUCATIONAL GAMES OOOO!!!!#LOOK AT THE SMALL HUMAN ON THE SCREEN WHICH PAIR OF SHOES MATCHES THE DRESS??? CHOOSE FAST!!!!!!#this could also open the door for an amazing bit though#where you start doing all of the same things back to the doctor and it works even better on them than it did you.#turn their ass into an ipad kid. they start arguing too much put his ass on minecraft pocket edition.#she just sits there for 1-3 hours. dead silence. you walk over like. 'hey. um. you good.'#no answer. you look ove rher shoulder. she has recreated ancient rome in minecraft in exact replica and is the reigning emperor.#they are roleplaying the roman senate with sheep and villagers. okay. can you please save the world now. please.#this is not to infantilize the doctor. he is old as shit. they are an adult. but by god can they be easily entertained.#not to mention that a key factor of the doctor IS their eternal childishness.#but they ARE a fully grown adult. beyond that even. ancient 'were you alive to see the dinosaurs grandpa?' ass motherfucker.#they are just also a masive loser. who would love minecraft pocket edition and lunchables. probably. who doesn't though.#bangers
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...
#oh lads. lads. lads. lads. im being sucked back into the world of academia#i dont even kno what happened. a week ago i was crying bc i was like: this is impossible. i simply cannot do this.#and then i went into the lab sunday and miraculously i was able to easily read some papers. like i dont kno how to discribe how baffling it#was. like reading papers is like pulling teeth and this was somehow easy. i think maybe it was bc i let myself get distracted and wander#thru it. and then after that i got so much done this week and i was tired but having fun. and like the thing is: i fucking love evolution#it's like puzzling out the code for life in both a metaphical and literal sense. its fucking incredible. and my project is also very#interesting. if a bit intimidating in its scope. ya kno. just in the way photosynthesis is generally intimidating#but i think i have a strain thats lost chlf which is really interesting and my advisor said we might have the money to try some crispr for#my cyano children. hypothetically. maybe. and i get to do some poking around in genomes. theres so so much to love there#how could i possibly want to do anything else? and yet. and yet. here at the end of the week im so wrung out and i kno i just have to start#again on sunday and i kno im gonna have to step it up in terms of reading if i want to make it through a committee meeting and proposal#defense. not to even mention a comprehensive exam. and what do i get at the end of all this? a lifetime of academia draining my life away.#bc what i do is so academic. so whats the point? its just so frustrating.#and on top of that ive got all this data from my old lab that i kno i have to work on. and i will. i will. but with what time?#anyway the point is. i can see a path forward now where i stay here and decide the pain will be worth it despite not knowing where im going#after that. im just so tried#but right now it feels like im gonna stay until someone kicks me out#but that doesnt exactly make me feel happy. ugh. but if i stay i want to get my old pi to come here and give a seminar. ill warn her how#intimidating the department is tho. we've had 2 talks in the last 2 weeks that were... not good. particularly the one this week#like she couldnt answer a single question they thru at her and didnt seem to kno her data sets. it was hard to watch. anyway. i just want#to see my academic mother again. send me back to the desert! let me rot in a field full of sage#but send me back to the hills of an older mountain range. where i can climb sandstone cliffs and lay in carpets of moss. except i wouldnt do#that bc of all the ticks and threat of lyme disease...#anyway. im still tired. still sad. and there doesnt seem to b a way out#unrelated
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reminders of the passage of time moodeboard
#my blog is in his last year of middle school. he'll be off to high school next year (at least I think so..? 13 yrs old is usually 8th grade#at least from my experience. 9th graders are usually 14. 10th are 15. etc. etc. and then you're in 12th grade#and graduate high school usually 17yrs old.) ANYWAY.. wow he is so ancient..#maybe he's still in a preteeny early teen emo phase or something.. I hope he gets some black and white striped armwarmers and black eyeline#r for his birthday. Maybe an MP3 player of course. Though because I don't really like most alternative music and he is my son he's actually#not allowed to listen to metal or pop punk or emo rock whatever stuff. I open the mp3 player and pre-stock it with only#disco and funk and classical music. he can have a little chiptune or techno stuff as a treat (sometimes emo adjacent maybe more#scene. I think a lot of scene kids were into that more.. emo's weird eccentric brother))#Also he starts taking iron pills his 13th birthday because he's probably incredibly anemic just like me#so on and so forth and et cetera (I'm just being silly.. I am not pro-controlling your children down to whatmusic they#listen to or etc.etc. lol)#THOUGH I love that it's in january... january is one of my favorite months if not my favorite. yeeaaay#just such a nice cool month. I like that it's the start of the year mostly and that it's sometimes snowy here. Like where I live nov - dec#isnt really actually snowy?? You always associate those winter Months with snow but I think snow happens later on this coast#so it's more like Jan - March or even april sometimes. Though that may just be climate change lol.. But it's cool that Jan is winter AND#ACTUALLY snowy. plus the Beginning Of Year vibes and energy.. hrm... nice nice.. ANYWAY#AND this is not even my first tumblr blog. I had a different one before it I think..#evviilll to be on one website for so long lol.. Very thankful that most websites I used to use as a 10 year old or whatever#are now defunct. There's something weird about how humans are just creating endless streams of words and pictures and all of this stuff#and it just goes out into the void and stays there long after the person themselves has forgotten it. not even like 'oh no what if i said#something bad!!' but more just the general sense of.. people create so much more ideas than they can actually hold in their heads. nobody#remembers exactly word for word every post they've ever made or etc. It's like parts of yourself that you've externalized and then fade awa#from you but they're still you but they're not so you just have little snapshots of yourself in time floating around entirely unbenknownst#to you. like making clones of yourself and then forgetting you did so but every once in a while going 'shit... there's clones out there..#of me and I don't even have track or awareness of them anymore.. what an odd concept..' etc. not EXACTLY like that ghbj..you know what I me#n.. or maybe you dont.. hrmm... ANYWAY#I am just now slightly recovering from my most recent mysterious illness spell and etc. so I would like to post more again and mAYBE even#do a costume if I'm being ambitious.. but after so many times of being randomly stricken by problems I'm now fearful of ever being too#hopeful lol.. always like 'I would like to go to the grocery store tomorrow! .... MAYBE.. if i CAN.. possibly... NOT getting my hopes up'.#etc. etc. etc. every statement has a caveat and a backup plan and so on and so forth and such is life.. anyway. happy birthday evil tumblr
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