#ocd masterlist
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phanfictioncatalogue · 2 years ago
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OCD Masterlist
Alone and Lonely; A Study In Human Emotion - phanwritings
Summary: The one where they decide to get married on a whim after just meeting each other.
An Obsession With Perfect (deviantart) - Gerards21guns
Summary: Dan has been at the mental hospital for 4 years now. He’s there for being Bipolar and having severe OCD, but he’s always had this obsession with perfection. However, Dan’s life changes forever when Dan meets the mysterious Phil Lester.
an overflowing cup of coffee (at eleven in the night) (ao3) - lvckyphan
Summary: “And Phil tries with crossed fingers only to keep both of their heads above the water because doing anything else is far too much work and he doesn’t wish for Dan to say thank you because he doesn’t wish for gratitude given fifty times over.
He doesn’t wish for the excuse that the first forty-nine times just didn’t feel right.”
Complusions (ao3) - orphan_account
Summary: Daniel Howell has dealt with OCD most of his life, he manages to control his intrusive/impulsive thought fairly well, his compulsions however are another story. Then Dan meets Phil Lester, the pretty boy in his first period English class, Phil seems to help his compulsions, he doesn't feel like he has to scrub his hands until they bleed after he's touched him, the thought of kissing him doesn't disgust him, and he finds himself fine sharing a bed with the boy. The thoughts that race through Dans head and make him scared and disgusted with himself however keep him from letting himself get close to Phil, despite how much he helps him Dan can't help but push him away.
Head Down Low (ao3) - Rhensis
Summary: Dan isn’t right. He’s not like most of the others, he’s not genetically pure. He has no destined path, he has nothing going for him in life. He’ll be lucky to get himself a job in a fast food kitchen, and everyone looks down on him like he’s a piece of dirt stuck at the bottom of their shoe. Except one person: Phil Lester.
His Smile Could Grow Symmetrical Flowers - daeguk
Summary: Phil Lester has OCD. He’s not a clean freak or overly clever or anything the films depict his illness to be, but he’s actually a mess, terrified of himself and of the way the thinks. Dan’s trying to help, but there’s only so much that he can do when his references are old books and shit, stereotypical films. Phil supposes it’s all a little fucked up. ((trigger warning for death))
Identity - botanistlester
Summary: Dan is definitely beyond nervous to start at the prestigious boarding school, Harrison Academy. He wants to get away from the past and start a new life, where he meets his dorm mate, Phil Lester. Phil is always happy, it seems, and wants the best for everyone, but as he continues to get to know Dan, he realizes that there's something wrong with this particular boy that maybe even Dan isn't aware of.
[I think] your inside is your best side (ao3) - eduardocullen
Summary: Dan stops replying.
it gets better (ao3) - orphan_account
Summary: Phil will happily take any amount of PDA from Dan. Granted, it’s not usually a lot when they’re out and about, but sometimes there’s a sneaky peck on the lips when there’s absolutely no one about, or the casual hand hold if they’re in a more remote place. More intimate things are reserved for the privacy of their own home. But when they’re stuck on a stupidly crowded tube carriage, standing in at least three different stranger’s personal bubbles at the same time, Phil’s holding onto the closest pole for his life, with Dan desperately clutching onto his arm like a newborn koala.
It gives him a warm fuzzy feeling. But it fades when he remembers how much Dan must be struggling in that moment.
Dan has obsessive compulsive disorder.
spirals (ao3) - orphan_account
Summary: In ice skating, a spiral is when you lift one leg up as high as you can behind you and tip your upper body forward, trying to keep your head to the horizon as you balance on a single edge. Dan remembers doing spirals all the time, holding his breath as he worked to keep that balance, stretching his legs so he could lift them higher, higher, higher, higher, up and up and up and up towards the sky. Despite everything, the tension of his foot as he balanced, the aches in his leg when he pushed it too high, the jump in his heart when he reached the precarious tipping point between the height of his leg and how low his torso was, when Dan did spirals he felt like he was flying.
superimpose (ao3) - howellesterfics
Summary: Being in his early thirties, Phil thinks he should have more to show than a minimum wage job and the amateur photography skills that rarely earn him any pay. Suddenly he's given the opportunity to display his pieces in a gallery down the street. He ultimately leaves with more than just a new sense of pride in his work when he gets caught up with the snarky and neurotic gallery assistant, Dan.
The Torture of OCD - wishicouldunreadthat
Summary: Dan never seemed the type. He was never unusually frustrated, never showed questionable behaviours. Hell, Phil never suspected a thing. One day came when he actually turned to look, and from then on their world started crumbling.
Time Ignites A Spark (ao3) - glitterhowell
Summary: Series of little Dan one-shots for ficmas
Your ‘odd’ is not the same as mine - phanfanrks
Summary: Phil Lester thinks he is odd. Dan Howell knows he is odd. Their odds are definitely not the same.
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soccerpunching · 1 year ago
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⚡️ zanark 👀
I'M SO SORRY FOR HOW LONG IT TOOK ME TO ANSWER THIS!!
My other zanark HC is that he has OCD, I had this hc since my second watch of chrono stone but it was something that im too afraid to say before like all of my disability hcs. For everyone with OCD, you are highly encouraged to kick me in the jaw (criticize me) if you find my words offending or ignorant (please point it out if im being insensitive).
i initially based this strictly on the way he talks and his catchphrase that he say a lot. it felt like it's something that he needed to do. something that he cant stop doing even if he wants to. but he does really want say it most of the time.
i hope this does not sound like im romanticizing intrusive thoughts (as someone who have dangerous ones) but i also think that what made him capable of miximaxing with a super typhoon is because he wasn't able to find a coping strategy that was able to help him through this (because he was in a prison). his intrusive thoughts were harder for him to manage... and became what they called his chaos in the series (which also canonically made it difficult for him to use his powers). i hope this was not ableist of me to say (but tell me if it is!!).
another thing, a bit unrelated to the hc i had above... not to bring zanakurou again on another zanark hc; but i genuinely believe that given that zanark had parents to raise him and wasn't given to a shit organization that puts kids in time warping prisons, he would have been just like zanakurou. with the chaos within himself strictly (and painfully/still unhealthily) managed for the honor and pride of his (chosen) family. he just gives me the vibes.
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neurodivergent-adulting · 7 months ago
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A quick guide to how I tag things:
Video - Audio - Visuals* - Text - Cooking - Sewing - Cleaning - Organizing - Hygiene - Medical care - Disability* - Pets - Electronics* - Exercise - Emergency - Weather - Employment - Financial - Housing - Reading* - Masterlist* - Miscellaneous*
Visuals - Posts that include some sort of visual aid or guide
Disability - Sort of a catch-all tag for disability stuff
Electronics - Tips or info regarding PCs, gaming consoles, phones, etc etc
Reading - Book recommendations for any topic. Such as a list of books on queer culture, books about racism or colonization, self-help books, etc etc
Masterlist - Posts with links/tips/info on multiple categories
Miscellaneous - Anything that doesn't quite fit into the other categories
Tags for specific disabilities/NDs:
Autism - ADHD - OCD - NPD - Plurality - Physical disability - Image description
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I try to be thorough but I may miss a few tags every now and then. Some of these posts are here because I'm tired of them getting lost in my drafts, so not every single post is about ~serious adult duties~ lol. I don't necessarily have every disability or ND that's mentioned here, I just rb things that could be useful to me or maybe for anyone that comes across this place.
If you have any questions or tips of your own, or if you just wanna say hi, feel free! My inbox and dms are open, just don't be rude ❤️
And before you go, know that you are important and wonderful. You deserve to be here and you're doing great by living another day! Please be kind to yourself and others 💕
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I don't feel comfortable getting too specific but, hi! I'm a queer, ND, disabled guy in his mid 20s! I was raised by a parent who sheltered me way too much and now I don't know how to do most "adult responsibilities", so I'm compiling a list of resources that apply to me mostly, but also things that may be helpful to others like me.
I am physically disabled and seriously doubt that I can work most jobs because of this. I also have pretty bad dissociation and memory problems that affect every detail of my life. The people in my life don't know about these things and couldn't be trusted with this info anyways, so I kind of suffer in silence irl :')
I developed really bad depression over a decade ago and frequently go through downward spirals, but I still try to treat other people kindly because the world needs more kindness in it. Especially these days. If you're kind to me, then I'll be kind to you, otherwise I'm just going to ignore or block you. I don't have enough battery to deal with rude people, not with all of the shit going on in my life ✌️😕
Anywaaaays this is getting really long now. I hope this blog helps you in some way! Byyyyeee!!
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entitled-fangirl · 23 days ago
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Horrid thoughts.
Cregan Stark x OCD wife!reader
Summary: the reader suffers from OCD, and Cregan tries to calm her.
Warnings: If your OCD is easily triggered, maybe shy away from this one.
A/n: my credentials you ask? I actually have OCD. And this is a short and sweet one cause it was a bit triggering for me I won’t lie😅
Masterlist
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................................
She let out a small gasp, prompting Cregan to look over to her. 
"Something the matter?"
She stared down at the floor, a furrowing in her brow. 
He sighed and set his writing aside. He spoke her name out loud, almost begging for her attention.
And she heard it that time. Her head snapped up so her eyes could meet his. "Hmm?"
"The thoughts are coming back, aren't they?"
He knew he was right by the way her eyes watered. 
"You were doing so well. What changed?"
She shrugged, tucking her hair behind her ear and moving back to staring at the floor. 
He should have known that the weather would affect her so badly. 
It had been the first fight in Winterfell that Cregan didn't have the advantage for. 
Only a few moons before, she had began to open up about these thoughts that appeared in her mind. They were always harsh and sometimes gory, an obvious thought she didn't want to have, but she couldn't stop it from slowly morphing into an obsession. 
And now that she had pointed it out, Cregan began to notice just how often it happened. 
"What is it? Tell me," he pressed.
She shook her head. She never did quite tell him, for fear that if it left her mouth, it would either come true, or he'd finally be convinced that she was mad. 
He stood and walked around the table to sit on the sofa with her. "Will you let me help you?"
That was usually his response. A soft assurance that he always wanted to help her, it was up to her to tell him how and to let him do so. 
"I want to leave," was her soft confession. 
He was confused. "The room? Or Winterfell?"
"The room. The room." That answer was much faster, an obvious feeling about the room getting to her.
Cregan grunted an acknowledgement before standing and offering his hand. "We'll take a walk. How does that sound for my brave girl?"
The idea didn't resonate with her as well as he had hoped, but she took it nonetheless, grabbing his arm. 
Additionally, the bad thoughts didn't just come and go. Some were more permanent. 
So permanent, that Cregan practically recognized her compulsions before she did. 
He stopped at the top of the staircase, knowing she would as well. 
Her eyes roamed over the stairs, counting them before doing quick math in her head. Then she stepped out with her left foot. 
They walked again like nothing had occurred until the next staircase neared. 
Before they could stop, Cregan's soft voice echoed in the corridor. "Right."
Her head snapped to him. "What?"
"Your right. C'mon," he said with a small tug to her hand. 
She hesitantly obeyed, stepping out with her right foot first this time. Honorable Cregan never lied, and he didn't then. For she finished the last step on the foot her mind told her to, and she felt instant relief. 
"How did you-"
"-I know you better than I know myself, sweet girl. Do not underestimate me. That," he tilted his head back and forth, "And I know the stair count for every set in Winterfell. Perks of being raised here."
Not long after that, she saw single chiseled letters by every staircase in the wall, either an L or R. A normal person would miss it, or not think twice about what it meant, but what had always filled her with dread now made her heart grow warm. Staircases weren't as frightening anymore. 
Especially when she knew he did that himself, not trusting another to count it just right. 
"What's that in your hand, lovely?" Cregan asked so softly he worried she didn't hear it. 
She looked down at her hand and back up, "my dagger."
"Why?"
She shook her head, just as she had before.
It always made Cregan rub at his forehead when he was meant with only more confusion. 
"Go back to bed," he quips softly. 
"Can't sleep."
"I'll walk you back," he offers.
She shakes her head again. "I couldn't if I wanted to."
A horrid thought must have occurred for her to abandon her bed to come to him. 
He rubbed at his hands in thought.
"If I guard you with Ice tonight, will you hand me your dagger so you may sleep peacefully?"
She contemplated his offer. "You'd do that?"
"Sweet girl, I'd do anything you need. You know that."
She looked down at the dagger and back to him. "I do."
"Alright," he said with his hand out, expecting the blade to be given to him.
She hesitated, then placed it in his large hand.
He threw it onto the desk then stood, taking her hand instead. "Let's get you to bed."
"What about-"
"-What about it?" He asked softly. "I'm here. Let me ease your mind."
"You're sure?"
His other hand rubbed at her bicep. "Very. C'mon."
"Cregan?"
He looked up, "Hmm?"
It was the early morning and he didn't think that she'd be up yet. 
"Love? What's wrong?"
She frowned. "I-I'm going to the Godswood."
He rubbed a hand over his chin. "You went yesterday."
She hummed.
"But you're going again today?" He questioned. 
She stared.
"This is the third day."
She stared.
"And it's too early."
She stared more.
"Sweet girl. You know what I'm going to say."
"Cregan-"
"Forgive me. I can't let you. I won't let you give in to this one."
She sniffled, "Why not?"
"This one is dangerous, my love. I can't let you go to the Godswood every day."
"Cregan, I have to."
"I'm sorry."
She sniffled again. "W- Please."
"That look causes a pain in my stomach, my heart." He grimaced at the sight of her tears. 
She reached up and wiped at her cheeks. "Oh. I-I'll go then. Forgive me for bothering you this morning."
"Wait," he commanded, standing and stomping to her. "Wait, my love." 
When he reached out for her hand, she flinched away from him, terrified of their skin touching. 
Cregan froze. "Sweet girl…"
Her hands shook. "I'm going to just… go back to my room."
"I didn't mean to upset you, my love. I know how your mind tends to-"
"I'm going to my room," she said firmly. But the firmness fell away just as quickly. "Do you think the gods can hear me from there?"
"I'm sure they can," he assured.
She wiped her hands on her skirt, as if rubbing off a bad feeling. "I'll be there then."
"Don't be angry with me."
She hummed and moved from the room.
A few hours, Cregan finally found time to go up to their chambers to make up for his behavior before.
That, and her handmaiden had told him that she refused food at supper.
So he entered their chamber with a small tray of food. 
She laid in the bed, a sullen look on her face. Her eyes were closed as her head rested against the headboard.
"Spent your entire day like this?" Cregan asked kindly.
She looked up at him, then relaxed again. "Yes. Is that bad of me?"
He sighed. "No. Not for you. Though, I heard you didn't take your usual walk in the courtyard. And denied food."
"Can't leave."
He set the tray on the bedside table. "I wish I could make sense of your mind."
"Me too."
"Want to tell me?"
"I'm not sure."
"That's alright." He sits down next to her, careful not to touch her. "Can I sit with you at least?"
She nodded.
The two sat in silence for a while.
"It started when I was younger," she finally said. "It felt like I finally had control of something. But… I don't feel like I have control anymore."
He listened vigilantly, careful to not interrupt her in any way.
"I get these thoughts that I can't force away. Horrid ones of things I don't wish to think of. Pain or death…"
"Ah."
"Do you think me mad?" She asked softly.
"No, sweet girl. I don't. Can I…?" He reached his hand out and let it hover over her leg. 
She grabbed his hand, making a warmth spread through him. "I'll spend the rest of the night with you, hm? We'll eat here and let the rest of the world be."
"You're probably busy-"
"I'm not. Now," he grabbed the tray and set it onto the bed, "Eat."
A genuine smile came to her face.
When the sun managed to appear in Winterfell after the season, so did her cheery disposition. 
Her horrid thoughts were gone. 
He noticed that she didn't even look at the walls of the staircases, stepping on either foot with no worry.
It made his heart burn with pride. 
She had control.
…......................................
Taglist: @twinkletwinklenotastar, @kidd3ath,@yujyujj, @misswynters, @cosmosnkaz, @sithapprentice, @kaniromi, @lovemesomevesey, @its-jackie-bb, @8812-342, @thorins-queen-of-erebor, @kingdomzeldaquest @nyxbranwenn, @callsignwidow, @a1lexh-blog, @alyssa-dayne, @ethereal-athalia, @ashovertheriver, @lost-in-fiction-like-ur-mom, @dozcan123, @wangjiangelangel, @kamitargaryen, @aegonswife, @lv7867, @helpmedecideaname
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hijinks-n-lowjinks · 1 year ago
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fic recs masterlist
since I was thinking about rereading some of my fav fics, here's a massive list of my favorites include haikyuu, jjk, bsd, etc
Haikyuu!
frankenstein's monster by starbeyy: sakuatsu fic where they both are diagnosed with OCD. this is the fic that is my instant rec, it's my roman empire. "you were the first beautiful thing i couldn't stop thinking about"?????????? this is a MASTERPIECE
the courtship ritual of the hercules beetle by kittebasu: THE iwaoi fic of all time, permanently altered my brain chemistry, my friend made me a gift of an embroidered hercules beetle and a quote from this fic and it's one of my most prized possessions
The Chosen One by moonyfest: one of my all time favorites, it's just so good and I love how their relationship develops, it's one of the fics that I reread every few months, nsfw in later chapters
Miya Atsumu, Adored By All (loved by some) by honest_pebble: the sakuatsu fic of all time, my inner atsumu kinnie came out while reading this and I cried multiple times while reading it but holy FUCK was it amazing, I reread this every few months as well, I have it downloaded on my phone lol
i wanna ruin our friendship by roseknight: highschool iwaoi fic, one of the first hq fics i ever read and it's very close to my heart because of it, make sure to look at tags for trigger warnings
i'm a house with no windows, you're the flowers on the front porch by miracleboysatori: a phenomenal childhood friends to lovers ushiten fic that has not been given the love it deserves, one of my favorite hq fics of all time, nsfw in later chapters
butterfly in the subway by bigspoonnoya: You've Got Mail au daisuga fic, a ton of background ships that are all super cute, I reread it all the time it's one of my favs!!!!!
the spirit of the resolution by starbeyy: this is my fav sunaosa fic of all time, osamu's complicated relationship with his self esteem really hit me especially when they're getting late night take out, i adore this fic and it's one of my favorites
can i be close to you by radian: kuroken fic where they don't know each other at first but slowly become friends and it's all lowercase but it's so good i promise, super fluffy
Vienna Waits For You by Pouler (poulerslashes): asanoya timeskip fic that's sooooo good in talking about what it's like to grow up and feel the pressure of the world on your shoulders and living up to your potential and expectations, nsfw in later chapters
Black and Blue by MTrash: daisuga au fic, i was obsessed with this fic when i first read it, it's really sad but really good, make sure to look at the tags for trigger warnings, nsfw in later chapters
you're the brake lines failing (as my car swerves off the freeway) by ghostpot: kuroken fic where kenma realizes he's in love with kuroo and spends the entire fic freaking out about it
campfire in your chest by deanpendragon: tsukkiyama fic where tsukishima realizes he's in love with tadashi before kagehina realize they're in love with each other and it's super cute, all of this author's tsukkiyama fics are so good
Liebesträume (Dream of Love) by emivance: sakuatsu rivals to lovers musican au, their dynamic this entire fic is so funny and they're obviously intro each other but are in deep denial about it, nsfw in later chapters
surfacing by meeks00: bokuaka au where they find out their bfs have been cheating on them with each other, one of my fav bkak fics they're so precious, nsfw in chapters 2 and 3
daisy rings and frivolous things (i am deliriously in love with you) by gabstar: bokuaka one shot that I am OBSESSED with, the way their relationship speed runs is my favorite aspect of this fic because its exactly what i imagine their relationship doing
Similar Creatures by h_lovely: iwaoi Pretty Woman au that's soooooo good, i really liked how their relationship developed and grew throughout the fic, nsfw all over this fic
Kiss Me (Like You Wanna Be Loved) by kazzydolyn: bokuaka friends w benefits fic where they fall in love with each other at the same time but akaashi doesn't know what to do about it, nsfw
Guiding Stars by daedalust: hiruhoshi fic that y'all will devour once we get more of hoshiumi and hirugami in the anime, they have one of my fav friendships in the series, hirugami is enamored with hoshiumi who asks for dating advice
Behind Bricks by DeathBelle: bokuaka au where akaashi is a sex worker and they become friends but bokuto falls in love with him instantly, a lot of nsfw obviously
Hard Times by mooifyourecows: daisuga au where olympian daichi pays con artist suga to be his fake fiance during a cruise, my FAVORITE daisuga fic ever, i was chomping at the bit for each update, nsfw in later chapters
Valor with Honor, Fealty with Love by radiantradish: daisuga medieval knight au, they slowly fall in love as rivals and it's suuuper cute yet angsty, mild nsfw in later chapters
In the Armpits of Spring by Paintbrushyy_Ducky98: iwaoi au where they meet in high school and oikawa confesses to iwaizumi before they ever really meet, iwaizumi's growing curiosity about oikawa is soooooo cute their relationship is developed really well
The Space Between Stars by leuralo_l: bokuaka fic where everyone but bokuto knows that akaashi is in love with him, I was so impressed with this fic especially since the author said it was their first fic pls give it a read!!!!!!
wait (I'm on my way) by viverella: sunaosa fic where they're both oblivious to each other's affections and are quietly pining, their relationship is super cute and adorable
Close to the Chest by darkmagicalgirl: kyouhaba fic where they bicker but slowly fall for each other during high school along with background iwaoi, i loved this fic it was so good, some mentioned and blatant homophobia
beautiful monsters by gravitates: ushiten fic with slight angst but damn did it make me feel emotional, ushijima is so soft and tender and loving to tendou, another one of my favs
Cool, detached, casual by fluorophoring: kuroken fic where they try to have casual sex but it doesn't really work and they both spiral lol, nsfw
Breakers by ftld: sunaosa 90s au, god I LOVED this fic and how obvious of a simp osamu is, it's sooooo good, some mentioned/blatant homophobia
Special Relativity and Years by buttonstuck: mega angsty iwaoi fics with the second being an alternate ending of the first fic that has a sad, bittersweet ending that made me cry harder than I have in YEARS, some mild nsfw in the first fic
your whole life on your play by emleewrites: kagehina proposal fic that goes exactly how i picture it would go in canon
make up your mind by sketchedsmiles: sunaosa fake dating au where osamu asks suna to be his fake bf in order to one up atsumu who's dating sakusa, i absolutely loved this fic lol
Jujutsu Kaisen
Caesura by cielelyse: suuuuuuch a good rivals to friends to lovers satosugu fic about their first year in jujutsu high together and the mission that made them friends, probably my fav jjk fic ever
And every day, it's changed since then. by BotanicalBites: inuokka college au where yuuta is an artist trying to escape from his growing fame in the country and meets farmer inumaki
What Instinct Can't Teach by kiyokosturtle: chosoyuki and it's sooooo good how to author develops their relationship before the smut lol, nsfw in the last chapter
The Long Con by lyrebirdswrites: an itafushi no curses au that isn't finished yet but is soooooo good, this fic is currently being plagiarized by another author so it's on hiatus for now but I'm hoping the original author gets everything worked out!!!!
Bungo Stray Dogs
where your loyalties lie by writingfromtheshadows: soukoku yakuza au, this is by far the best bsd fic i've read so far, their relationship is just so believable and their characters are wonderful, nsfw
the art of burning bridges by sanguinekitten: soukoku fic from chuuya's perspective about different times in their lives together, it's so good
i think he knows by sanguinekitten: soukoku 5+1 fic where dazai knows that chuuya loves him but the latter refuses to admit it
Threats Made in a Hotel Room by moonrice (moonyeyes): soukoku fic where dazai pisses of chuuya so much they start making out
A Lesson in Thorns by arkastadt: soukoku beast au fic where they're in an arranged marriage and slowly fall in love, similar premise to where your loyalties lie but an entirely different plot, I still have ten chapters left but I'm really enjoying it so far, nsfw
Miscellaneous
i'll be your biggest kept secret and your biggest mistake by sascake: mha tododeku fic that I instantly fell in love with, the way the author writes both of them is so well done, not finished yet, mild nsfw mention
sore must be the storm by Pouler (poulerslashes): mha tododeku fic where they're trapped in a collapsing building and they have a deep talk about their lives
Until my Feet Bleed and My Heart Aches by Reiya: yoi viktuuri au fic that I binged like crazy, yuuri and viktor's first interaction goes differently and yuuri is determined to hate viktor, nsfw in later chapters
seraph's nest by phile: csm akiangel fic where they slowly become friends and fall in love with each other over the course of the manga's plot
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Note
Hey! I was hoping you could write something for Marc Spector/Fem! Reader (all 3 boys) where the reader unknowingly does something which upsets the boys, and they kinda pull away, but after the reader keeps asking them about it, they spill (Maybe Marc would feel bad about being upset yada yada yada).
Yooooo, my HEART! What are you trying to do to me? (affectionate)
Pull Away
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Marc Spector x GN!Reader • Rating: PG pals •Masterlist• ao3• want to be tagged? | requestinfo• ko-fi •
Summary: Headcanons of when there's an unintentional upset with the Moon Boys.
A/N: I've changed this a little, sorry! I hope that's okay, it sort of went and did it's own thing.
There some talk of OCD. I have OCD, and only found out quite recently that people with autism and adhd are a little more likely to develop OCD than someone who doesn’t. (You’re also more likely to develop it if you have other mental illnesses, like depression/anxiety etc.) Obviously, this is just my own little headcanon but the layout of Steven’s flat does remind me of my OCD hoarder tendencies, while Marc’s minimalism makes me think of how when I was a very young adult I tried to ‘cure’ my ‘messiness’ by going so minimal it was like I had nothing. (Spoiler: it not only didn’t work but made me very sad.)
Warnings: Marc being sad and not so good with his feelings, swearing, a little bickering, OCD talk, over use of italics, typos, not beta read, railroad sentences, please let me know if I've missed a warning!
Word Count: 995
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I feel like Marc doesn’t like expressing himself very much, especially when it’s a ‘negative’ emotion. 
Which means he’ll bottle it up and self internalise it.
This becomes a problem, because even if you do little things that you have no intention of upsetting him, he won’t tell you when you do them. Which means you’re gonna do them again. And he’ll get upset again. And it’ll just go around and around in a vicious circle. 
So much so that he’ll start getting a bit resentful that you’re still doing it, even though he knows logically there is no way for you to know that it’s upsetting him. 
So the internalsion and beating himself up will turn into him being very low, and quiet and giving you the silent treatment. 
Now, he’s not trying to give you the Silent Treatment ™ as a punishment, he just worries about his own reactions (terrified of ever raising his voice in anger to you, or having any kind of disagreement, let alone argument) so he thinks it’s best if he doesn’t talk, doesn’t interact with you. 
He tends to fade back and let Jake or Steven front most of the time. 
“Where’s Marc? Is he okay?” 
“He’s fine, Love.” “He’s well, Amor.” 
But neither of them really knows, they are just trying to comfort and reassure you because, in all honesty, they don’t know either. 
He’s giving them the silent treatment too. 
If you do something to upset Steven, unintentionally or not, he’s telling you. He’ll try not to let it bother him, try to not tell you, but all that lasts the grand total of 2.6 seconds. 
“Love, can you not do that, please? It’s just it upsets me, yeah?” He’ll fiddle with his hands a little if he thinks it’s a ‘silly’ thing. 
But’ll smile when you say of course. He’ll also talk about it in more detail, happy to explain why something bothers him, even if he’s not 100% sure. (He’ll start talking about his physical reactions, “it’s just when you touch that part of my back that way it feels all funny, like I want to be sick.”)
If it’s something that is more to do with an ‘unhealthy reaction’ that’s bothering him (OCD talk here) then he’s also open to discussing it when you prompt him. 
“Why don’t you want the cups here?” 
“Because they don’t go there?”
“Okay, is this a ‘they don’t go there because this is the best place for ‘or a ‘they go there in this way or something bad will happen?’”
“Erm… the second one.” 
“Okay.” Lots of hugs and reassurance. “Do you want to put them somewhere different to fight the OCD?”
“No. But let’s.” 
Jake is a little more likely to stew a little when he’s upset than Steven, but he normally will come and speak with you very quickly after taking a small breath. 
“Amor, please do not do that.” 
You know when something really bothers him because he speaks completely blankly. There’s no emotion and his eyes look empty, as if he’s glazed over. It’s part of his defence mechanism. 
When he’s like this you try to speak as calmly and softly as you can. You once turned a bit quickly when he spoke to look at him and his flinch nearly broke your heart. 
He knows you wouldn’t strike him, but he can’t fight the muscle memory. 
You offer physical contact by holding your arms out to your sides (not in front of you) so that he can initiate it if he wants. Which 99% of the time he does. 
He doesn’t like to speak about the reasons something is bothering him until later, after he’s calmed and his heart has stopped racing. Sometimes this takes a few minutes, other times hours or even days before he feels ready. 
He started to write whatever bothered him, summarising it in a sentence on a scrap piece of paper and pins it to the fridge to let you know he will talk to you about it and that he wants to. He just needs time. 
When Marc has been hiding for a while he starts to feel guilty about it more and more, which only makes him want to stay away from the front even more as well. 
Steven tells him off for sulking.  
Jake tries to reason with him.
In the end, Marc only fronts when he feels ready. 
Very rarely does he tell you what was wrong. Mainly because it doesn’t want to bother you with it. 
Sometimes if you do something he doesn’t like and Steven or Jake are close enough to the front they will be the ones to tell you. 
“Marc doesn’t like that.” 
Marc gets moody with his headmates for ‘speaking for him’.
“Not like you were gonna do it yourself mate, was it? No. You were gonna go and piss off and sulk.” 
“Steven,” Jake is ever the voice of reason, can feel how Marc bristles underneath their skin. “Marc needs time sometimes, you know that.” 
“Yeah, but he’s got to learn to communicate too. Can’t be bloody trying to get everyone to read his mind and then getting upset.” 
It starts a bit of a heated discussion that you can’t hear. 
But you do notice how Marc tenses up.
“Hey,” you nudge your arm into his softly and smile when he looks up at you. “I won’t do it again, okay?” 
He smiled weakly and nods, taking your hand in his and playing with your fingers. “I’ll try to tell you what’s going on more…”
“It’s okay,” you pause, “You know what? How about when I do something that’s upsetting you don’t have to speak, or explain if you don’t want to, but just let me know by signing? That way I won’t do it again.” 
Marc nods and you teach him the sign language for stop in your language. 
It works well for you both.
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starmocha · 2 months ago
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☾ ⋆*・゚:⋆*・゚ masterlist — series
lol it's been bugging me that the main masterlist doesn't have some stories sorted by series (AO3 does), so I finally gotten around to making a subsection so my ocd can calm tf down 🫠
last updated: nov. 9, 2024
someone you loved
Based on the 30-day absence text messages. Stories can be interpreted as standalones or sharing the same universe. CW: angst, tragedy, grieving status: 2/4 completed [will update to include future love interests] 01. the day bleeds into nightfall (Zayne/MC) 02. never the same (Rafayel/MC) 03. (Xavier/MC) 04. (Sylus/MC)
sweet little snowdrop
Stories about Zayne and his three-year-old son. status: ongoing indefinitely // updated sporadically 01. 12:30 PM Checkup 02. Carrot Cake
bright little starlight
Stories about Xavier and his two-year-old daughter. status: ongoing indefinitely // updated sporadically 01. Time-Out
pretty little coral
Stories about Rafayel and his three-year-old son. status: ongoing indefinitely // updated sporadically 01.
sing little birdie
Stories about Sylus and his three-year-old daughter. status: ongoing indefinitely // updated sporadically 01. Rock-a‐Bye 02. Hide-and-Seek 03. Little Dino
birds of a feather — 《 MDNI 》
Sylus with a breeding kink because fuck yes y'all peer pressured me into making this a series i blame you guys jk i'm digging this too, but i was enabled ❤️ status: 2/3 completed 01. but if it's forever, it's even better 02. it was always you 03.
Bride of the Dragon King — 《 MDNI 》
Once upon a time, I yapped that I wanted a dragon!Sylus AU...and then people enabled me, so here we are. status: 1/3 completed 01. Prelude 02. Bride of the Dragon King 03. Epilogue
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aestheticaltcow · 9 months ago
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omg I love your work! I was wondering if you can write about the reader sleeping over at carmy’s place for the first time. maybe they cook dinner together and stuff? 🫶
Slumber Party
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A/N: I kinda wish I'd gone in a different direction with this one, but it works, ya know?
The Bear Masterlist
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“Thanks, Carmy. My roommate is being absolutely bat shit.” you smiled as you followed Carmy into his apartment. “No problem, baby.” he grinned. Tonight was the first time you were sleeping over at Carmy’s place. While the two of you had been together for a while, there was still a layer of nervousness. It wasn’t like you two hadn’t spent the night together before, but it was always at your place. Carmy said he didn’t mind the longer commute to work, but the reality was he’d been back in Chicago for a few years now but had made minimal effort to make his apartment an actual apartment. For Carmy, it was just a place to sleep and shower. After meeting you, he decided it may be time to establish real roots; he’d made his apartment slightly more homey, but Sugar still said it was like a college kid’s apartment except with Carmy’s OCD-like cleanliness levels. 
“Wanna put your bag in my room?” he asked, hoping he remembered to make the bed that morning. “Uh yeah…” you grinned. “It’s just down there.” Carmy cocked his head to the right, “Sorry if it smells like cigarettes in here…” “Don’t worry about it, Carm. I’d be sleeping on the L now if it weren't for you.” 
You looked around Carmy’s bedroom. You’d visited him in the past but realized this was the first time you’d been in his bedroom. It was bare except for a deli container half filled with water and a book on his bedside table. After dropping your backpack next to his, you stood in the middle of his room, taking in the sight before you. When Carmy slept at your place for the first time, he admired the pictures you’d hung and the posters tacked to the walls. He liked how you’d painted the walls and had a dedicated area to get ready. He liked the mountain of pillows on your bed and the extra throw blankets you kept at the foot of the bed, and now, standing in his bedroom, you’d realized why he liked your place. You ran a hand down the quilt atop his bed and sat down. His mattress was firm; you took a deep breath, absorbing the scent of Carmy’s cologne and cigarette smoke.
“Hey baby, you hungry?” Carmy asked from the doorway, “I could eat.” he shook his head at your comment. “I need to get some stuff from the store. Wanna come?” “Do you mind if I stay here and shower?” he shook his head, “Go for it. Towels are in the closet.” 
The hot water of the shower felt good on your muscles. As you rinse the shampoo out of your hair, you can’t help but notice the 3-in-1 Axe in Carmy’s shower organizer. You didn’t think Carmy was that kind of guy to use 3-in-1, but tonight was the night you’d learn more about him. After drying off with a worn-out, bleach-stained bath towel, you slipped on your pjs, which consisted of an oversized t-shirt and old running shorts. By the time you’d finished your skincare routine, Carmy had returned to the apartment. 
“Can I help?” Carmy looked up as you entered the kitchen, “Of course, baby,” Carmy smiled. “I can always use a sou.” you laughed as he threw you an apron. You stood next to Carmy grating cheese while he explained the difference between real chicken alfredo and the “alfredo” you’d make at home. You giggled as he got progressively more passionate about it. You bumped him with your hip to get his attention, “Okay, Mr. Chef. I grated the cheese.” Carmy rolled his eyes before kissing your cheek. “Thank you.”
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logansargeantsbabymom · 5 months ago
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The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived
Oscar Piastri x Fem!Reader , Lando Norris x Fem!Reader
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort
Warning: cursing, douchebag Oscar, cheating
A/N: I definitely did lie to you guys, I promise you that I am working on TGTSG pt 8, it's just taking more time than I'd like to admit! Sorry and I hope this makes this situation better <3
Follow my instagram account (THATS STRICTLY FOR THIS BLOG) for updates on when i post and fun stuff like that!
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F1 Masterlist
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Was any of it true? Gazing at me starry-eyed. 
“Oscar, c’mon we’re going to be late!!!” I said ushering my boyfriend out of our bedroom closet. 
A light chuckle left his lips as he emerged from the magical sliding mirror doors “Babe, it’s only the car reveal. It’s okay if we’re a tiny bit late” Oscar said as he walked over to me, rubbing a hand up and down my shoulders
An unamused look became present on my face “Baby, you know how much I can’t stand being just a millisecond off schedule, right now you have us 10 minutes behind! You’re killing me here!!” I added a bit of an exaggerated sigh as I dragged out that last sentence. 
I wouldn’t say I had OCD or whatever but if anything and I mean ANYTHING was just the slightest bit off, I wouldn’t be able to focus on whatever task was at hand before it was fixed. 
“Okay, okay. Let’s go. Thank god you’re dating a Formula 1 driver who knows a thing or two about driving fast. I promise we’re going to be there on time.” A small smile made its way on the corners of Oscars mouth as he grabbed my hand and guided me out of the house and to his McLaren.
And your Jehovah’s Witness suit. Who the fuck was that guy?
We’d arrived at the headquarters just under 2 minutes till Zak had to go up and make his big speech before revealing the 2024 season’s car.
Oscar and I tried to make our quiet entrance as to not draw attention to us being technically 30 minutes late. 
See the drivers and the workers that didn’t help set everything up had to be there at 8:00pm whereas everyone else who had a special invitation had to be there at 8:20pm and then Zak’s speech would take place at 8:30pm but thanks to Oscar just NEEDING to find the perfect outfit himself instead of just putting on the one that his assistant brought him, he made us super late. 
Lando was the first to notice our not so subtle attempt at being sneaky “Mate, if you wanted to shag your girlfriend you couldn’t given me a heads up so I could’ve made up an excuse as to why you weren’t here when you were supposed to.” 
Embarrassment flooded my cheeks at the thought of more than half the people in our vicinity thought that t and I were late because we wanted to have a quick fuck before we left 
“No Lando!! We’re not late because we fucked! We’re late because Oscar here,” I started, gesturing at the handsome man next to me “decided he didn’t like the outfit that his assistant brought for him so he had to spend an hour picking and changing his clothes until he found what he thought was best for him.” 
My answer seemed to satisfy Lando enough because he wiggled his eyebrows at us before nodding, taking a sip of his very much alcoholic drink before walking away from us. 
“Oh my gosh Oscar, never again am I being late with you. I can’t have people thinking we fuck like rabbits all the time!!!” I groaned, rubbing a hand over my face.
You tried to buy some pills. From a friend of friends of mine, they just ghosted you. Now you know what it feels like. 
Oscar left to go get both of us a drink before the lights dimmed and a spotlight was shone on Zak, who was standing at the top of the steps.
Zak looked around to get a good feel of the crowd’s energy tonight “Hey guys, I’m the McLaren CEO, Zak Brown. I’m sure you all know why you’re here tonight but in case you don’t, let me tell you why. You’re all here because you either work here or was invited. Either way, tonight, we’re all going to witness the unveiling of our 2024 seasons formula 1 car! But before we get to that part, I want to call up my two Formula 1 drivers to say a few words. Lando, Oscar, please come up here.” 
And I don’t even want you back, I just want to know if rusting my sparking summer was the goal. 
I clapped and watched as my boyfriend and our best friend walked up to make their speech, Lando being the first to take the mic.
“First I just want to say: Thank you everyone for being here with us today to do this reveal, none of this would be possible without any of you guys and that each and every single one of us here at McLaren are extremely grateful to you guys. Thank you to Zak for believing in me enough to resign me for the next 2 years and uh yeah, I’ll pass it on to Oscar now.” That last part came out with a little awkward chuckle as Lando scanned the room before passing the mic to Oscar 
“Hello, Uh Lando said the majority of what I was going to say but I also want to thank my beautiful, wonderful, loving, thoughtful, talent girlfriend for sticking by my side” Oscar started as he looked deep in my eyes as the crowd around us ‘Aww’ed us “oh and thank you to Y/N for being there too.” he added with a laugh that caused the crowd to also erupt in fits of laughter.
My face turned red and my blood began to boil. Did he really just say that? I mean I could be making this a bigger deal than it is but to me, Oscar just embarrassed me in front of maybe 250+ people, who mind you might do a little ‘story time’ on their experience there and would add that part which means hundreds of thousands of people are going to hear about how Oscar embarrassed me. 
The rest of Oscar’s speech was a blur and I hadn’t even notice that him and Lando had left the top steps until I felt his arms around my waist and my body tensed at the feeling. Oscar’s touch right now made me feel sick, who did he think he was embarrassing me like that in front of hundreds of strangers and then acting like nothing happened? 
And I don’t miss what we had but could someone give a message to the smallest man who ever lived?
I shrugged Oscar’s arms off of me which earned me a confused glare from him which I quickly shut down
“I’m going to grab another drink. Do you want anything?” It was the best I could come up with. 
It got Oscar’s touch off of me and it gave me some space away from him, which I so desperately needed right now.
“No thank you, just hurry back” Oscar said sweetly as he attempted to place a kiss on my lips that I quickly dodged. 
I saw another look of confused flash across his face but I was too busy getting far away from him as possible to notice how long his face had stayed like that. 
Over at the makeshift bar they had, I poured myself a half cup of punch before making my way to the other end of the bar to fill the rest of my cup up with tequila. I closed my eyes as I took a sip of my alcoholic punch before letting out a satisfied sigh while feeling the drink burn its way down my throat, my solo bliss didn’t last long before I felt the presence of someone near me. Opening my eyes, I was met with one of my dearest best friends: Lando. 
“Having fun?” Lando said as he grabbed himself a cupful of punch awaiting my response 
“So much fun, I totally don’t want to be at home with a (favorite/drink) eating (favorite/food) while watching (favorite/ show) right now.” I said as I let out a sarcastic laugh which earned me a glare “I’m kidding Lando. I’m having a good time, what about you?” 
“Just a good time? Why not an amazing time?” Typical Lando to only catch the first half of my sentence 
“I have a mild headache right now, that’s why it’s just a good time I’m having right now. I didn’t have time to grab or take any medicine so I’m suffering right now.” that was the best lie I could come up with, let’s just hope that he believes it. 
By the look on his face right now, he was starting to believe the lie I just spewed to him. “I think Zak has Ibuprofen in his office, let me ask him to grab you some” before I could protest, he was gone. 
You hung me your wall, stabbed me with your pushpins. 
I realized that I was spending too much time at the bar and that Oscar was going to come looking for me soon so to save him the hassle, I made my way back over to him. 
Turns out he wasn’t going to be looking for me soon because he’s too busy having some blondie all over him. She’s running one of her hands through his hair while the other is resting against his forearm. The sight made bile rise in my throat as my stomach churned, I can’t be seeing this clearly right? Maybe I actually was suffering from a massive headache and that’s causing me to see all these things, right? This wouldn’t be the first time something like this happened, granted I’ve only ever heard of a ‘headache so bad you’re seeing things’ in movies before so I can’t really rely on it being a real thing. 
Once Oscar’s gaze quickly fell on me, he pushed the blonde off of him and quickly made his way over to me. 
“Hey beautiful, you were gone for a while.” He tries to plant a kiss on my lips but I placed a firm hand against his chest to leave a gap. 
Apparently me dodging his kiss for the second time tonight really upset Oscar because he rolled his eyes before bringing his concerns to my attention 
“What is wrong with you? This is the second time you dodged my kiss, what’s going on?” I could tell there was hints of an attitude lacing his words.
“Oh geez Oscar I don’t know, maybe it’s because I come back over from getting punch and I see a blonde girl all over you and you’re letting it happen?” I can’t believe he really has the audacity to question why I’m dodging his kiss when he quite literally was probably cheating on me in public less than 2 minutes ago. 
A scoff left Oscar’s mouth as he rolled his eyes at my comment “You’re kidding right? That’s what this” he gestured in between us, “is about? C’mon Y/N, she literally is my race engineer trainee, we were literally talking about work”
“Oh yeah because talking about work requires her to be handsy with you in public in front of your girlfriend?” I can’t believe Oscar was trying to downplay this right now. 
I watched as Oscar shifted on his feet before crossing his arms “First of all, you weren’t in front of us and second of all, she wasn’t being handsy. Sarah just asked what shampoo and conditioner I used because her brother needed recommendations and I told her the ones you buy me.” 
“That doesn’t give her the right to run her hands through your hair while holding your forearm, are you kidding me?” Everyone around us could feel the tension thickening. It was so thick that you could break 2 machetes trying to cut through it. 
“Go be insecure about our relationship elsewhere, I don’t have time to deal with this right now.” I didn’t even have a chance to get a word in before Oscar stormed away from me, leaving me alone in a crowd full of his co-workers and fans with nothing but my hurt feelings and confused thoughts about what the fuck happened in the last five minutes. There was only one thing in my head right now that was clear: I need to get the fuck out of here now before I make this a bigger deal than it is.
In public, showed me off. Then sank in stoned oblivion cause once your queen had come, you’d treat her like an also-ran. 
I don’t know when I got home nor do I know how I got home, all I know is that I’m home and home is where I’m free to drown my sorrows with a nice bottle of Brothers Bond bourbon in peace. Only, I wasn’t able to have a second of peace because a rapid set of knocks were being banged against my front door which caused me to jump at the sudden sound and tighten my grip on my drink. Walking to the door with an annoyed expression on my face I was met with Lando’s somber expression. 
“Lando, I’m sure you heard about the fight and I just really want to be alone right now.” I said as I attempted to slam the door in his face but was blocked by his foot.
“Ow, I didn’t expect that to hurt that bad.” Lando started as he tried to shake the pain out of his foot “Everyone knows about the fight-” 
“Ugh, great” I scoffed
“That’s not why I’m here though-” Lando didn’t get to finish before I cut him off again
“So why are you here? I mean no offense but I want to be alone right now”
“Stop cutting me off then. I’m here because, gosh I don’t know how to say this to you” He took in a deep breath before letting it out in one long exhale “I’m just gonna show you” I didn’t get to process the words that came out of his mouth before he flipped his phone showing me a video of Oscar and Sarah making out in the corner of the room before Sarah dragged him out of the frame. 
It doesn’t take a genius to know that they we’re going to find somewhere there to have sex. The video was a total of about 10 seconds and by the end of it, tears had already fallen. It’s funny how in a span of ten seconds your whole life could change, one minute I was upset over an argument I had with my boyfriend and the next I’m watching a video of him cheating on me. The sight before me made bile rise in my throat as I felt my heart shatter into a million tiny pieces.  I never knew that loving someone could cause so much hurt, that if they did wrong by you it would feel like you were dying. I couldn’t breathe, it felt like my whole world was caving in on me and I couldn’t do anything to stop it, that I was just there to watch this tragedy unfold. I never knew that someone who claimed to love you until the end of time could do something so terrible to the one person they promised to never hurt, that even after you watched video proof of him cheating on you that you didn’t want to believe it. I shared a lot of firsts with Oscar, the most important being that he was my first love, he took my virginity from me and that’s one that’s one thing I could never get back from him. Despite everything I’m feeling now, I wish there was someone who could tell me why my heart wants to go back to him. My heart yearns for Oscar’s touch, his love, his time, my heart just wants it all, everything Oscar is willing to give it. 
You didn’t measure up in any measure of a man. And I don’t even want you back, I just want to know if rusting my sparkling summer was the goal. 
It’d been 15 minutes since I found out about Oscar cheating on me and the whole time Lando’s been holding me as I sobbed into his chest, I was so hurt by Oscar that I couldn’t find any sense of comfort in Lando’s touch. I feared that I wouldn’t be able to find comfort in anyone’s touch because of how bad Oscar hurt me and that’s not how I wanted to live my life. That’s not how anyone should have to live their life, surrounded by so much hurt that you can’t find joy in anything. The pain was consuming me so much that I felt like the only way to make it go away was to drown it in alcohol and that’s what I intend on doing. 
Pulling myself out of Lando’s grasp, I leaned forward and grabbed the bourbon bottle on mu coffee table and brought it up to my lips. I took one big gulp, enjoying the burning sensation I was feeling as the liquid ran down my throat. I took another long sip before the bottle was yanked from my hands. 
“Lando please, give it back I don’t want to feel this. I don’t want to feel anything, I cant live like this.” I started to sob again, hoping he would feel bad enough to just let me drink the whole bottle. ‘
Unfortunately Lando didn’t cave into me “I know it hurts but you have to feel the pain. You have to feel all your emotions in order to get past this, I know Oscar hurt you but I’m here to help you. I’m your best friend and I want everything for you but you can’t drown your feelings in liquor, I love you too much allow that.” I almost wanted to believe the words coming out of Lando’s mouth because I know he’s not Oscar and that I can trust him but a part of me doesn’t want to trust him and Lando could sense that
“Y/N/N, I need you to believe me. I want the best for you and you know that, you know that’s all I’ve ever wanted for you but right now I need you to trust me. Alcohol isn’t the solution.” The look in his eyes were sincere and I knew I could trust him.
I buried my face in my hands as I reluctantly let the bottle go and allowed Lando to take it from my hands to lock it away in Oscar’s liquor cabinet. By the time Lando had returned to the living room   and saw my state he could obviously tell that at any given moment, I would start spiraling again and that was the last thing either of us wanted right now. I felt the sofa dip next to me before abruptly being pulled against a body.
“I’m going to hold you like this and you can talk about any and everything or we could just sit in silence but I can see it in your eyes that you want to be held.” Lando said as he rested his chin against the top of my head which I moved to look at him in his eyes.
I was able to whisper a faint “okay” as I looked in his aquamarine eyes, I never realized hoe beautiful they were until right now. Now that I think about it, everything I’m noticing on his face right now, I never had noticed before. I never realized all these little features in his face that made him beautiful, actually, I never realized how beautiful Lando was until right now. How plump his lips looked, how soft and fluffy his hair must feel against the palm of my skin, how the gap between us seemed to slowly disappear as I looked at him looking down at my lips and how soon the gap between us closed as our lips met. This kiss I was sharing with Lando felt different from all the kisses I’ve ever shared with Oscar, this one kiss alone had butterflies lighting fireworks in my stomach as I felt my broken heart mend. It sounds crazy, I know but something about this moment with Lando felt raw and real, it felt like everything I was missing in my relationship with Oscar was just found. 
The kiss consumed my whole being, I never want this moment to end. Everything felt right and nothing could ruin this moment. 
“ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?”
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acidicpenumbra · 1 year ago
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Hello describers of things can we stop using medical terminology as descriptors please PLEASE
Sorry grievances time because I don’t like it there are alternatives and I will literally fucking list them for you. (Alternatives are given as alternative words to HOW PEOPLE WRONGLY USE the disorders in question, NOT AS ACCURATE DESCRIPTIONS of the disorders/symptoms. Thanx. A handful of the “alternatives” can still be used as derogatory but for fucks sake what the fuck ever stop using medical terms as insults)
(Edit: Here to clarify that my intention of the words below is not to say I see other mentally ill or disabled people like this, it’s specifically what I myself most commonly see people use the diagnostic words to mean. I believe it is also important to say that all terms below can be used in a derogatory/negative sense, and while I do see the issues potentially present with someone having terms just to be an asshole, I also want to say that it’s easier to phase out legitimate medical terminology from people’s vocabularies if you offer alternatives instead of just telling them not to say things. This was originally a rant post about my own frustrations regarding misuses of diagnostic terminology & misusing those terms as a means to insult/demean people, as it is offensive and conveys that their problems make them nothing more than an insult to you.)
Bipolar/Manic (alternative words/phrases that don’t refer to/demonize bipolar disorder: inconsistent, erratic, unpredictable, flighty, fickle, irregular, volatile, temperamental)
Delusional/Psychotic (alternative words/phrases that don’t refer specifically to/demonize psychosis: deranged, unstable, frantic, unhinged, frenzied)
Narcissist (alternative words/phrases that don’t refer to/demonize NPD: egotistical, entitled, full of oneself, vain, selfish, haughty, prideful, arrogant)
Psychopath/Sociopath (alternative words/phrases that don’t refer to/demonize ASPD: cold, uncaring, calculated, withdrawn)
Braindead (alternative words/phrases that don’t ridicule/make a spectacle out of actual brain death: absentminded, unwise, foolish, stupid, oblivious)
Antisocial (alternative words/phrases that don’t refer to ASPD: not social, asocial, introverted)
Obsessive Compulsive (alternative words/phrases that don’t devalue or otherwise stigmatize OCD: perfectionist, organized, tidy, neat, structured) 
Intrusive Thoughts (alternative words/phrases that don’t devalue or otherwise stigmatize legitimate intrusive thoughts: impulsive-, reckless-, spontaneous-, rash-, all ending in “thought/thoughts”)
This isn’t like a masterlist or anything it’s just a list I have on hand but like for real stop calling people sociopaths and psychos and shit this sucks balls Thanks
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torukmaktoskxawng · 2 years ago
Text
'anla - part two
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Series Masterlist
Summary: Life on the reef has started to change the Sully kids for the better, while a storm looms overhead. Certain teenagers are in denial of each other.
Pairing: Ao'nung/Fem!Na'vi!Sully Reader
Warnings: Mature language, teenagers acting their age, time skips, strict parents, puppy love, canon compliance, slow burn, etc.
Word Count: 5k+
Tag: #'anla ao'nung fic
Na'vi Words: nivi - hammocks, marui - homes, ilu - dolphin like creatures, tulkun - whale like creatures, tsurak - skimwings, Sänrr Rong - the Glow Tunnel, spä - jump, olo'eyktan - clan leader, sa'sem - parents, Iknimaya - Rite of Passage, tsahik - spiritual leader, tsakarem - tsahik in training, tsmukan - brother, Utraya Moktri - Metkayina Spirit Tree, kuru - braid neural queue, fpxafaw - medusa
Taglist (red indicates "could not tag"): @timotheechalametishot @ghost-lantern @shadowmoonlight0604 @melsunshine @ocd-onut @purennn @themostegotisticalgirl124 @notsochillnerd @athenachu @yhern05 @amortencjja
A/N: I tagged everyone from the comment section of the first chapter who was excited or asking for part two. I couldn't respond to them in the comment section because this is a secondary account, so if you do or don't want to be on the taglist, please let me know via ask box or dm, thank you!
read it here on ao3
(I do not consent to my works being reposted or copied)
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Kiri had woken shortly after, crying, but was otherwise unharmed and showing no signs what happened had affected her. They gave her a day to recover in their home while the rest of the Sullys went about their day normally, sending Norm and Max away with heartfelt goodbyes and returning to the sea life they had started to grow accustomed to. 
Lo'ak and Y/n were put in charge of plucking barnacles off the bottom of canoes for the afternoon, and the young boy takes the time to avoid silence and boredom, "So what are you doing with Ao'nung?"
Y/n doesn't react or even bother looking up from her handiwork, "What do you mean?"
"I mean when did you guys become friends?"
She looked up then, puzzled as she stared at her younger brother, "I'm confused. Weren't we trying to all be friends?"
Lo'ak paused from working for a moment, shrugging, "Well, we were trying to just earn their respect and get along, but yeah, I guess we did come out as friends."
"I guess we're full of surprises."
"But the other night, you guys were being... weird."
Y/n huffed with mirth, "Look who's talking."
"Shut up." He snarled, "Have you guys been hanging out a lot?"
"Not really. Just a few times lately."
"Is that where you were the other night? This... Arch?"
"Yeah. Ao'nung said he had something to show me."
Lo'ak's expression goes blank, "Y/n. Dad taught us to literally never follow someone just because they said they have something to show you. He called it 'stranger danger' or something like that."
She tossed a barnacle at him, "Is this coming from the boy who willingly followed Ao'nung and his friends beyond the reef?"
"... Okay. Fine. You win."
"Besides, Ao'nung didn't phrase it like that. It was a lot less creepy."
"So why didn't he invite the rest of us to the Arch?"
"You guys had already gone for the day so he just took me." Y/n then reached over to mess with Lo'ak's hair, earning an annoyed hiss and she smiles, "Don't look too closely at it, alright? We're friends now."
~~~~~~~~~
A peaceful morning where the Sullys find themselves rolling up their nivi after a night's rest is interrupted by a horn, followed by whoops and hollers of celebration coming from outside. Confused and on edge, Jake and the kids emerge from the marui, looking around as the Metkayina jump around and dive into the water, making the newcomers curious as to what was going on.
Their answer came in the form of Tsireya, astride an ilu as she waves down her people from the water below their homes, "The tulkun have returned! Everybody! Our brothers and sisters have returned!"
Y/n looked up toward the atoll walls protecting the village from less docile nature. Emerging from the tunnels and pathways were rolling waves indicating something large underneath the water. Spurts of seaspray spring out like geysers from beneath the ocean's surface. It was a large pod of whale-like creatures, massive and slow. Their descent onto the village was graceful and one that brought much joy to the Metkayina as they couldn't get in the water fast enough.
The Sully kids couldn't wait either, jumping from the walkway around their home and into the water below. They scatter, exploring the new creatures one way or another. Tsireya had grabbed Lo'ak when she spotted him and pulled him onto her ilu, swimming away to introduce him to her Spirit Sister. Jake summoned his tsurak and both he and Neytiri take off to observe the sacred animals themselves. Rotxo had come around and pulled Kiri and Tuk away too, leaving the twins to their own devices. Ao'nung was not far behind his friend, inviting Neteyam and Y/n to come along with him to find his own Spirit Brother. All three teenagers grab an ilu and take off, making a game of chase with Ao'nung in the lead.
They weave through and around the large bodies of tulkun, dodging other ilu and Na'vi while keeping close to Ao'nung the entire time. He leads them through the chaos expertly, the three teenagers swimming quickly around a particular tulkun. Kiri, Tuk, and Rotxo were hanging onto the bull's fin and gliding peacefully through the water, the tulkun likely the reef boy's Spirit Brother. Neteyam and Y/n are only able to catch a glimpse of this as they swim by, keeping close to Ao'nung's tail until he slows down in front of a particular bull. This tulkun didn't have tattoos yet, much like Ao'nung as he signed to the twins, "My Spirit Brother."
Neteyam drifts close to the creature's eye, signing, "Greetings, mighty tulkun."
"I See you, Forest Brother." The tulkun sang as his form of speaking, and luckily, having had enough lessons, Neteyam and Y/n were able to grasp the old language.
Y/n ditched her ilu and swam up next, signing effortlessly, "I See you, Great Spirit Brother of Ao'nung."
"Hello, Forest Sister. I See you."
Ao'nung's hand gestures were too fast, and the twins were unable to read them but they had no need. The signing was not for them as Ao'nung was trying to relay a season's worth of events to his Spirit Brother, more excited than either Omatikaya have ever seen him. Ao'nung was smiling softly, and brightly as he tried to tell a story only to stumble over his own way of telling it. The tulkun in front of him chimed in as his way of laughing, urging the Na'vi boy to slow down. Y/n managed to pick up some of the gestures after Ao'nung slowed, not missing the words 'Sky People', 'Forest People', and 'new friends'.
Neteyam took a break to swim up and get some air, but Y/n managed to stay underwater a little longer. She didn't want to miss a second of this adorable interaction, and somehow found herself roped in it when the tulkun turned its eye to her.
"Ao'nung tells me that you are a mighty warrior, Y/n te Suli Neytiri'ite."
"He's being nice in your presence," Y/n signed back with a grin, "I have seen war but not been a part of it. I am too young. I am a hunter at best."
Neteyam, still treading water at the surface, takes a deep breath and simply dunks his face underwater, looking back down to locate Y/n and Ao'nung. He found them below, right where he had left them with the bull tulkun. Y/n was signing to the creature, keeping herself swimming next to his eye while Ao'nung floated off to the side, watching them. Neteyam didn't miss the way Ao'nung was staring at her, yet again, when she was not looking. The reef boy's face was calm, his lips relaxing into a soft, carefree smile, never taking his eyes off the Na'vi girl.
That evening was full of celebration, music and dancing a central part of it. Bonfires lined up the beach where the village people could still be close to their ocean brothers and sisters. Late night dives through bioluminescent waves, sending scattered stars up to the sky whenever a splash was made or a tulkun jumped through the air, cascading back down into the water.
Ao'nung kept Neteyam and Y/n with him most of the evening, adamantly talking about his Spirit Brother and the stories exchanged between them. At one point, the three of them were sitting on the edge of a rock fixture, their toes in the water below as they watched the tulkun dancing around in the distance. Neteyam rolled his eyes lightheartedly at a certain part of Ao'nung's story where his mischief had got the best of him. The Omatikaya boy took a moment to glance at his sister, then looked away-- only to double-check when he saw something that intrigued him.
Y/n was watching Ao'nung with a tender expression, her smile sweet and fond as her eyes locked onto every hand gesture and every laugh Ao'nung made, who was clearly unaware of her stares throughout his story-telling. She laughed and nodded whenever she was supposed to in between tales, urging the boy on when he knew he had an avid listening audience. Neteyam smiled, too, though he was sure it wasn't for the same reasons his sister was smiling.
~~~~~~~~~ 
After that fateful day, Ao'nung invited Neteyam and Y/n to everything. They spent whole afternoons together, sometimes sitting around on the rocks, soaking up the sun while they exchanged stories. After hearing all of Ao'nung's tales between him and his Spirit Brother, either one or both twins would tell him stories from the forest growing up. They told him everything, from their childhood to recent events before they had left their home. Ao'nung was actually a good listener if one sat him down to do so. He nodded in acknowledgment and asked questions between appropriate breaks in the stories. Neteyam could tell how much Y/n appreciated this side of Ao'nung, the girl perking up and gladly answering whatever questions he had. At the end of the day, Neteyam couldn't recall if he ever answered any of Ao'nung's questions himself, but he didn't have the heart to care.
The three were also fond of hunting together and sometimes brought Rotxo and Lo'ak along, this time within the reef and with higher spirits. Some days they would mess around too much and wouldn't catch anything, other times they used their newfound friendship and teamwork to coordinate and bring home enough fish to feed all their families combined.
Ao'nung and Y/n decide to bring all the kids to Sänrr Rong. Tuk was the more ecstatic out of all of them, but everyone was delighted by this new place they could use as a hideout away from their parents. This time, they got a chance to cliff dive from the very top of the arch. The reef kids showed them the path up but were shocked to watch the Sully kids effortlessly climb up the rock as if they were born to do so. Even Tuk showed zero signs of exhaustion as she took a stable vine hand and scurried up it like a monkey. The Omatikaya children were clearly faster and more agile climbers than the Metkayina and therefore made it to the top before the locals even had a chance.
"We'll throw you down a vine so you can catch up," Y/n jeers as she pointedly climbed over Ao'nung.
The reef boy hissed, though it appeared to be playful as he makes a point to tug her tail as she passed him. Y/n hissed back and made sure to gently shove his big forehead with her toes as she climbed before leaping out of reach. They all eventually make it to the top of the cliff, hair whipping wildly in the unforgivable winds, then the reef kids stood over the edge, looking down at the ocean water below.
"Okay! Everyone ready?" Tsireya beamed with excitement.
"For what?" Lo'ak questioned.
"SPÄ!" Rotxo hoots to the clouds as he jumps off the ledge, straightening his legs and stiffening his posture as he falls-- falls-- falls--
SPLASH.
"Who's next?" Ao'nung grinned.
Lo'ak was closest to the edge, peering over and even squinting when he couldn't spot Rotxo all the way down there, wadding in the sea, "Has anyone died doing this?"
The reef boy laughed, "If you wanna be the first, then don't stiffen your form as Rotxo did. Flail about like a screaming baby."
"Me next!" Tuk squealed.
"NO!" All four of her siblings, including Tsireya, shout in different ranges of emotion, such as fear, amusement, and seriousness.
The little girl stomps her foot, pouting as she crossed her arms, "Then why am I even here?"
"To keep me company," Y/n cut in, tugging her baby sister's arm until the shorter girl is pressed into her side. Y/n holds her tight while carefully watching the cliff, being sure to stay close to the middle and away from all edges.
"Aw, Forest Girl, you are scared," Ao'nung laughs, clapping his hands together once in amusement, "I thought you liked to fly?"
She glares at him, sticking her nose up in the direction of the cliff's edge, "That's not flying. It's falling."
Needless to say, Y/n and Tuk didn't do any cliff diving and left that to their other siblings. Kiri went first after Tsireya offered to go with her. Holding hands, the girls jump, screaming and laughing with both delight and horror. Neteyam paced along the edge of the cliff until he watched Kiri's head rise from the water, then relaxed. Once Ao'nung dared the Sully boys to race to the bottom, they were suddenly all for it, jumping off at the same time. Ao'nung took his time and teetered over the edge, grinning when he watched how nervous Y/n shuffled, keeping Tuk close to her side. The future olo'eyktan pretended to lose his balance, earning a laugh from Little Tuk and a scowl from Y/n before Ao'nung also jumped, hitting the water with practiced ease and a laugh still bubbling in his throat.
They climbed up and jumped back down several times, each time trying to persuade Y/n to jump. She put her foot down every time, even when her twin Neteyam offered to either go with her or stay with Tuk. Still, Y/n would not give into the peer pressure and Tuk was miserable by the time they returned home, squawking to her parents while stating that no one would let her cliff dive. Jake and Neytiri exchanged looks and appeared grateful when they nod to their older children with approval.
~~~~~~~~~
The Sully kids' lessons continue as usual, the older ones now granted permission to hunt in groups outside the reef if they pleased. Once they were fluent in signing, they learned to strengthen their knowledge in communicating with the tulkun for the next time. Their knowledge was tested when Tsireya, Ao'nung, and Rotxo refused to talk to them unless they used and perfected the language through signing. When Jake and Neytiri call their children home every night, they often find them sitting silently among each other, only using hand motions to communicate.
Many times, the group of friends return to the Glow Tunnel, to have fun or to enjoy the silence. Each time they all gathered at the center of the village, ready to go back to the Arch, everyone was so eager. All except one particular day, when Lo'ak was nowhere to be found once it was time to go. His absence did not go unnoticed. While Kiri decided to bring Tuk home, the others volunteered to go look for him, and hopefully, he wasn't in trouble like last time. With their newfound hunting party privileges, they go swimming beyond the reef in search of the Omatikaya boy.
They stumble upon Lo'ak by chance, and he wasn't alone. Swimming around him was an impressive tulkun, the left side of the bull scarred and missing a fin. Payakan. Neteyam and Y/n look at each other, worried, while the reef children watch curiously. Payakan and Lo'ak swam around each other like dancers, graceful and practiced. Then, the tulkun turned, fully facing Lo'ak, and opened his mouth, jaw unhinging to reveal the dark cave within. Lo'ak willingly swam in, and Payakan closed his mouth behind him. The twins went to scurry out of hiding as they watched this happen, but both Tsireya and Ao'nung stop them while Rotxo looked on, amazed.
Tsireya went on to further explain that Payakan had chosen Lo'ak to form tsaheylu, and while she appeared proud and excited at the idea, Ao'nung and Rotxo exchanged uncertain glances. Y/n had noticed this exchange, reaching out and grabbing Ao'nung's shoulder, forcing him to look back at her. When the reef boy met her curious gaze, she made movements in the water with her hands, "What is wrong?"
Ao'nung shakes his head and signs back, "Sa'sem will not be pleased."
They definitely were not. Once Lo'ak returned home with the other teenagers, word spread fast and reached Tonowari's ears. Together, he and Ronal round up the teens and brought them to their marui to have a stern lecture, berating the Metkayina children for allowing Lo'ak to bond with the tulkun outcast. It didn't go well as Lo'ak was adamant about Payakan being misunderstood and how he wasn't a killer, even by the Tulkun Way. Jake Sully refused to let his son explain and took him away to straighten him out, but the damage had already been done. Neytiri gathered the twins and followed the father and troubled son home.
They hadn't gone to the communal meal that night, instead, they ate together at home, as a family. Jake was certain that the Metkayina would only receive Lo'ak coldly should they turn up there now, so he suggested that they wait until things cooled down before returning to the village dinners. The Sullys' absence was missed that night, mostly by the children who had slowly become their friends.
Y/n was distressed when her family stayed close to their home the next morning, her father ordering the children to stay near and don't go further beyond the walkways of the village. It felt like a prison sentence to be stuck in one place when it was such a beautiful day out. Neytiri promised her children that they can move on with their lives tomorrow once Jake had calmed down and she spoke to him, but for now, "Listen to your father."
"I see that if one sibling gets punished, we all get punished now," Y/n snarled to Neteyam when she found a moment alone with her twin. Neytiri took Jake hunting with her so that they may talk, while the twins were ordered to look after their younger siblings for the night. Lo'ak and the girls went to sleep not long after their parents had gone, but the oldest son and daughter remained wide awake, talking quietly to one another just outside the marui.
Neteyam exhaled air through his nose, squinting at the dark ink of water in the distance, absently swinging one leg off the side of the walkway, "You don't mean that."
"No?"
"You're just saying that because you've been stuck here with all of us today, unable to go anywhere."
He turned and clocked the snarl on her nearly identical face, her eyebrow hairs furrowing together while she looked away, rocking herself by her heels, "I hate it."
Neteyam smiled fondly, "I know you do. You always hated small spaces. I can see why you like this place better than home."
A pregnant pause hangs in the air over the twins, the only sounds around them being the water and the village, still stirring with life as things begin to settle down. Y/n doesn't look back at Neteyam, sitting on his words for a moment until she slowly turns back, expression blank and immovable, "I don't like this place better than home. I miss home."
"Of course you do. Doesn't change the fact that you're far more free here than you were back there. You've adjusted well here, even if Dad doesn't see it," Neteyam leans over and pats his sister's knee, "He doesn't see how fast you caught onto the Metkayina ways, he just sees all the times we screwed up."
Her ears flatten as she glares at him through her eyelids, unimpressed, "You mean how Lo'ak screwed up."
"We, Y/n. We."
She rolls her sharp, yellow eyes, "If anything, Dad should be proud of him. Bonding with a tulkun is a young Metkayina's first step to their Iknimaya."
"And only you would know that because you've gotten so accustomed here."
She winced, batting his hand from her knee, "You can't talk like this when one day we're just gonna be heading home again. Stop it now. Talk less about how much we like this place and it might hurt less when we eventually leave."
"Do you want to leave?" He cocks his head, eyes scanning her face for an answer.
"... I want to see the forest again."
"That's not what I asked."
"... Do you?"
"Yes."
Y/n's eyes squint, confused, "Why?"
"I have nothing here."
"You have us. You have our friends."
"Yes, but that's all," Neteyam looks around and Y/n follows his gaze, "You have the ocean, the plant life, the sea life. The ilu, the Sänrr Rong-- everything. You love everything about this place. I only love the people. Don't get me wrong. It's a beautiful paradise and I loved experiencing every part of it... but I want to go home. I felt more at peace there."
"At peace?" The twin girl scowled, "We were at war, 'Teyam."
"Yes." She doesn't miss the way his eyes darken a shade, expression hardening into stone as he glares back out to the sea, "But war is what I was trained for."
The silence is chilling this time, Y/n's heart dropping to her stomach as guilt runs through her veins. Even as twins, Neteyam was still the older brother. He and Y/n might have been conceived during a war, but Neteyam had been bred for it, whether or not their parents realized this. Before Kiri was in the picture and before either she or Y/n had their own voices, Y/n was the one expected to be the next tsahik. With Little Y/n learning the Will of Eywa from her grandmother, Neteyam was learning to be the next olo'eyktan. He had to learn to be strong quick, to hunt quick, to think quick. Even when Y/n finally put her foot down and passed the torch of tsakarem to Kiri, she couldn't catch up to all Neteyam had already learned. She wasn't able to share that burden with her twin, and that guilt hung heavy in her heart.
"... That's not a good thing, tsmukan." She spoke gently, even her whisper sounding like a drum in the silence, "There's more to life than fighting."
"I know," Neteyam's posture shrinks, defeated, his smile not quite reaching his eyes when he glances back to Y/n, "But I haven't found what that 'more' is yet. Not for me at least... You did."
"I did?" She tilts her head curiously.
A glint sparkles in Neteyam's eye, like he knew a secret that not even his twin knew. His tail swings behind him with interest, teasing when he nudged her leg with his shoulder, "Ao'nung is good for you. And you're good for him."
He caught the flash in her eye. The flash of understanding behind the meaning of his words. The flash is there one moment and then gone the next. Y/n shifts uncomfortably in her sitting posture and nods, "He's a good friend."
"He is." Neteyam chuckles, "For me. For Lo'ak, and Kiri, and Tuk. But not for you. For you, he's 'more.'"
Quiet surrounds them once again, Y/n glaring down at her feet as if she had been caught stealing treats from Norm. She looked ashamed and belittled, likely wishing her own brother didn't know everything about her even before she knew those things herself. She swallows down whatever emotion came to mind before she looked up, stubbornly staring Neteyam down,
"I don't need 'more'. I just need this. This family is all I need."
~~~~~~~~~
The Sully family had been tense ever since Lo'ak bonded with Payakan, speaking few and far in between words to one another if found in the same space. It wasn't much significance to them whether or not Lo'ak had bonded with the outcast, but to Jake, it was all about principle. Whether or not the family was proud or disappointed in Lo'ak's accomplishment had not been said, but something heavy was floating in the air, like the calm before the storm. The idea of war was still fresh at the very back of their minds, ever looming like a vulture, waiting to strike. Something had changed the other night, shifting into place, deciding the Sullys' fates. Although, no one knew what kind of fate, and that unsettled them.
Unlike the rest of her family, however, Y/n wanted to do something about it. She started by finding the one person she knew would help her, "Take me to the Cove of the Ancestors."
Ao'nung looked up from sharpening his spear, ears immediately rising to the sound of her voice. He tilts his head and forms a closed-mouth smile, though his eyes squint in confusion, trying to solve whatever puzzle he found on Y/n's face, "Why?"
"Because you said you would take me there," Y/n quipped back, taking the spear out of his hands and backing away, "I'm cashing in the offer."
"What is 'cashing?'" He stood up, following her with his arm out, only half-heartedly trying to take the spear back from the Omatikaya girl.
When she purposely kept the weapon out of his reach, Ao'nung smirked, taking a huge step forward so he could stare smugly down at her with their subtle height difference. They were close, close enough to share the same air, and despite Neteyam's words playing back in her head, despite the shame and guilt in her gut, Y/n stomped it down and stood strong.
"It means I want you to stand behind your word." She matches his grin with one of her own, ignoring the heat threatening to rise up to her face as she purposely kept eye contact, "You promised to take me to the Cove. I want you to keep your promise."
She stepped away then, never taking her eyes off him until she fully turned back in the direction she came, walking away with the spear still in hand. She could feel his eyes on her, a thrill running up her spine at the mental image of it. An even bigger thrill, the one led by a horn of victory in her head, went through her whole body when she heard Ao'nung dutifully following her without complaint and without question.
They summoned nearby ilu and fled without another word. They dive down deep into the water and only resurfaced when they had left the sea wall and village behind. Once Y/n inhaled the crisp air, she tosses the spear back to Ao'nung, who effortlessly caught it with a grin of excitement and promise, "Follow me."
~~~~~~~~~
A feeling of familiarity took hold of Y/n when she emerged from the water and looked up to find floating islands all around her. An instant smile graces her face, looking around at all the floating rocks, surrounding a wide circle of water at the center of spectacularly arched rocks easily identifying this sacred place. It wasn't entirely like the Hallelujah Mountains. These floating islands were smaller and floated horizontally, like large stepping stones leading up to the heavens above.
Ao'nung emerged and looked around, unimpressed, "This is it."
"It's beautiful."
He shrugged, "It's not much."
"To you, maybe," she grinned while pointing up at the floating rocks, "To me, I see the potential of kicking your ass climbing up those islands."
He laughed, "Careful what you wish for, Forest Girl."
"Is the Tree on one of those islands?"
"Nope." He smiles slyly, "I'll give you another guess though."
She flashed an odd look before looking around, finally staring down below, into the water. Ao'nung dismounted from his ilu and drifted over to Y/n, "Remember, I'm just acting as your diving partner today. We always have to pair up here. One has to watch over and monitor the other while they connect to our ancestors. Got it?" She nods. "Let's go."
The Na'vi girl sinks into the water with him and they submerge after she takes a deep breath. They swim down, side by side, as they approach the large, underwater Spirit Tree. Instead of limbs hanging down like Y/n was used to, this tree's arms reached up, flowing in the water like an overlarge, glowing anemone. Y/n reaches out and gently touches one of the luminous, graceful fronds, smiling to herself when it tickled her palm to greet her.
Ao'nung chirps low in his throat, like a baby crocodile, to grab Y/n's attention. When she turned her head in his direction, he moves his hands about, "The Tree is called Utraya Mokri. It gives breath when the kuru is connected."
Y/n nods in understanding, reaching behind and taking her braid in hand. She gently offers the tendrils to reach out and curl into the ones belonging to the Tree and closed her eyes.
Ao'nung dutifully keeps watch while Y/n connects with his ancestors. The Tree glows and looms beautifully over him, but he's not paying attention. He's seen the Tree hundreds of times and while it is beautiful, it's nothing new. Y/n, on the other hand, is new, and his attention would rather fixate on her than the Tree he's grown bored of over his young life. Her braided hair floats around her like fpxafaw, and her tail, usually dormant, twitches occasionally in response to the bond. Her fingers, all five of them, still delicately hold her braid to the Tree's fronds. Her hands weren't as strange as Ao'nung initially thought. In many ways, he reasoned the extra finger was good for some things-- like the punch Lo'ak fooled him into taking. If nothing else, an extra finger just means more to hold.
Y/n's body jolts and Ao'nung is torn from his traitorous thoughts. He swims forward and wraps his whole hand around her arm and then her kuru lets go of the Tree. Y/n's eyes flutter, still closed, a little dazed and overwhelmed from the whole experience as expected. With Ao'nung's support, she's brought back up to the surface and she slowly remembers to breathe again, now that she didn't have the Spirit Tree to aid her. The two young Na'vi stay there, treading water as Y/n catches her breath, and once her head is no longer foggy, her eyes appeared saddened, an expression that irritated Ao'nung for some reason.
"Not what you were expecting?" He asked light-heartedly.
"It's just..." she shook her head, bottom lip pouting with her eyes lowered, the water reaching up to kiss her chin, "I was hoping for answers."
He didn't ask, but maybe he should have. It's something that would continue to gnaw at him as the rain clouds float overhead. It would gnaw at him as he expressed on returning home before the storm, it would gnaw at him as their swim back resulted in silence and pouring rain. It would continue to gnaw at him as they approached the village, his ears rising to attention when the horn sounds, his blood cooling in fear and worry.
"Find your family."
"Why?" Y/n asked as her ears lowered in concern, loose hairs plastered to her forehead, "What's wrong?"
"It's a war cry. My father has called for a war meeting."
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A/N: Not sure when 'part three' will be out, but it'll likely be longer than normal. Thank you so much for all the support and love I have seen from my very first Avatar work! It motivates me to continue doing what I love!
part three
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astrosouldivinity · 2 months ago
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I made a masterlist to keep track of all of my posts. Thank you for your support 🤍
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Tip Jar: 🫙 𝒮𝓊𝓅𝓅𝑜𝓇𝓉 𝑀𝓎 𝒞𝑜𝓈𝓂𝒾𝒸 𝒥𝑜𝓊𝓇𝓃𝑒𝓎 🔮
𝙽𝚘 𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚐𝚒𝚊𝚛𝚒𝚣𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚘𝚏 𝚖𝚢 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚔 𝚒𝚜 𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚘𝚠𝚎𝚍. 𝙷𝚘𝚠𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛, 𝚒𝚏 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚊𝚗𝚢 𝚘𝚏 𝚖𝚢 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚔 𝚙𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚎 𝚐𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚖𝚎 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚛 𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚍𝚒𝚝: @𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚘𝚜𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍𝚒𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚒𝚝𝚢
𝑨𝒍𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒐𝒍𝒐𝒈𝒚, 𝒔𝒑𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒖𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚, 𝒑𝒉𝒊𝒍𝒐𝒔𝒐𝒑𝒉𝒚, 𝒑𝒔𝒚𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒍𝒐𝒈𝒚, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒚. ⁴⁴⁴
Journal Prompts
1. Full Moon (Pisces) Journal Prompts
2. New Moon (Libra) Journal Prompts
3. Full Moon (Aries) Journal Prompts
4. New Moon (Scorpio) Journal Prompts
5. Full Moon (Taurus) Journal Prompts
Random Astrology Observations
1. Astro Observations One
2. Astro Observations Two
3. Astro Observations Three
4. Astro Observations Four
5. Astro Observations Five
6. Astro Observations Six
7. Astro Observations Seven
8. Astro Observations Eight
9. Astro Observations Nine
Astro Enemies Series
❁ Hidden Enemies
❁ Open Enemies
Venus Sign Observations
𖦹 Mutable
𖦹 Fixed
𖦹 Cardinal
Astrology / Tarot Observations
🀧🀣🀢🀤🀦
Philosophy
✎ Attract
✎ Affirmations
✎ Halloween Affirmations
✎ Yin & Yang
✎ Self-Acceptance
✎ Authenticity
✎ Authenticity Pt. 2
✎ Stoicism
✎ Reflections
✎ Perspective
✎ Capitalism
✎ Capitalism Pt. 2
Manifestation
𑁍 Part One
𑁍 Part Two
Houses in Astrology
𖤓 Houses in Astrology & What They Represent
𖤓 Chiron Throughout The Houses
Evolved / Unevolved Zodiac Signs
⟡ Air
⟡ Earth
⟡ Fire
⟡ Water
Holiday Gifts 🎁
Age of Aquarius ♒️✨
2024 Presidential Analysis
Planets / Outer Planets
Throwback (Me)
Major Asteroids
Black Sheep
Styling
Evil Eye 🧿
Evil Eye 2 🧿
Evil Eye 3 🧿
─── ⋆⋅ ☾⋅⋆ ───
Astro / Psychology Observations
✮ OCD / Anxiety Part One + Autism / ADHD
✮ OCD / Anxiety Part Two + Autism / ADHD
✮ BPD Part One
✮ BPD Part Two
My Art ~
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ꨄ Spell Jars
ꨄ Beaded Rings
ꨄ Spell Jars Updated
ꨄ Wire Wrapped Rings
Spells ~
• Return to Sender/Freeze Spell
Etc.
1. What The Zodiac Signs Can Teach You
2. Healing Journey (Scorpio Season)
3. Some Facts About Astrology
4. Astro Love Struggles Part 1
5. Astro Love Struggles Part 2
6. Quintiles/Biquintiles
7. Pluto in Aquarius
8. Earth Sign Coded
9. Fire Mercury Coded
10. Zodiac Hedonism
11. Psychic Abilities
12. Blocked Chakras
13. Omnist (Spirituality)
14. Zodiac Karmic Lessons
15. Healing From Wounds
16. Beauty Placements/Degrees
17. Roles of The Zodiac Part One
18. Roles of The Zodiac Part Two
─── ⋆⋅ ☾⋅⋆ ───
𝒜𝒷𝑜𝓊𝓉 𝑀𝑒 ~
♉︎ ✹ ・♊︎ ⏾ ・♋︎ ↑
INFP
Life Path Number 6
Favorite Color ~ Midnight Blue 🌌
Favorite Animal ~ Cat
Favorite Bands ~ The Internet & Tame Impala 🎶
Moon, Jupiter, & Uranus Dominant ♅ ☾ ♃
©𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚘𝚜𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍𝚒𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚒𝚝𝚢 𝙰𝚕𝚕 𝚁𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚜 𝚁𝚎𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚟𝚎𝚍.
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cameronspecial · 10 months ago
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rafe x ocd!reader
she’s constantly checking if she closed the doors and windows before going to bed or outside. at night she sometimes doesn’t get sleep because her mind is telling her she didn’t close and lock them so she has to get up again and check, getting almost no sleep sometimes. rafe comforts her and sometimes they take pictures or videos so she knows she locked it without getting up
hes just so understanding and helpful
One Lock, Two Locks, Three Locks More
Pairing: Rafe Cameron x OCD!Reader
Warnings: N/A
Pronouns: She/Her
Word Count: 0.5K
Masterlist
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Y/N knows she locked the doors and windows. Rafe wouldn’t have gone to bed if they didn’t, but something in her mind is telling her they didn’t do it right. She accidentally locked the kitchen window before locking the front door and the front door should always be locked first. She tried moving on and telling herself it didn’t matter, not wanting to keep Rafe up for longer than necessary. However, the incorrect order of how she did things is keeping her up. Her eyes are wide as she watches the clock tick. Rafe’s hold blankets her, keeping her warm against the cold night. She has to relock all the doors or else she won’t be able to sleep. She ducks under his arm and heads downstairs. Her feet lead her to every external lock on the ground floor and she unlocks every single one of them. And then she starts the ritual of locking them up again. The doors need to be locked first because those are the biggest points of entry. She locks the front door first and then heads to the patio door at the back of the house. She secures both of those before moving on to the windows. These have to be done in a clockwise motion around the house. First, the window to the right of the front entrance and then the one in the adjoining living room to the right. 
She goes around the house getting everything locked up, ending the routine at the window to the left of the front door. Except… She can’t remember if she locked the first window in Rafe’s office first or if she locked the second one first. She better do this all over again just in case. 
Rafe attempts to pull his girlfriend in closer to his chest in his sleep, yet it doesn’t work because the space she usually occupies is empty. The clicks coming from downstairs tell him exactly what she is doing. It’s freezing in the house and he knows she is probably just wearing his t-shirt to bed. He shrugs on a hoodie and gets her one too. His feet pad down the stairs to find Y/N at the front door. “Sweetheart, did we lock the doors wrong tonight?” he croaks in his tired voice. She loves how he says we, not in a condescending way, but in a way that lifts a little bit of pressure off her about this being her fault. She gives a tiny nod as he holds the sweater up for her to put on. He kisses her on the forehead with a nod and pulls his phone out “How about I turn the locks and you record it to make sure that we do it in the right order?” he suggests, holding his phone out to her. She takes it and motions for him to start. Rafe spends about ten minutes going through the order in his head to make sure everything is locked correctly. He makes sure to relock each lock three times to assure her that they did, in fact, lock the first time. 
Once the video is filmed, he tugs her to bed and wraps his arms around her as they rest on their sides. He holds his phone up for her to watch the video. Her rigid position that tells him she is awake soon turns relaxed and he kisses the back of her head before turning his phone off. Leaving tonight’s video to join its hundreds of brothers and sisters in Rafe’s camera roll. 
Taglist: @winterrrnight @loves0phelia @thelomlisrafecameron @wickedlovely121 @victory-in-the-llama @drewsmusee @starkowswife @maybankslover
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tonysbed · 6 months ago
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Mental health masterlist
Please read the following fics with caution. There are sensitive topics which could be triggering for some.
Remember, you are not alone.
You can request anything btw. Feel free for any kind of comfort you may want and request it with your driver <3 Even if there is already a work for the driver, you can still request him with a different topic. Or the topic with a different driver!!
Uploaded
Max Verstappen
Butterfly | MV1
Max comes home earlier than expected (Sh/Cutting)
Pink skies | MV1
Max comforts you during grief
Prom Paddok queen | MV1
Max tries to be there for you while your whole world evolves around calories (ED)
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Oscar Piastri
Blue Poison | OP81
Oscar has been away for a triple header, not being able to be there for you.What happens once he is finally back home?(OCD)
pulsating love | OP81
health anxiety gets the best of you and oscar’s right there by your side
million noises | OP81
You have a meltdown at the paddock but your boyfriend comes to the rescue
pages of horror | OP81
oscar finally realised how burnt out you really were..
flavours of choice | OP81
oscar supports you in something no one really has before ( Picky eater!reader)
Bad habit | OP81
Even tho you and Oscar talked about it and he did everything in his power to help you, you fell back into your bad habit..
enough | OP81
You overthink a bit to much and your depression is not much of help..
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Lando Norris
Dead Flowers | LN4
Why would he ever chose you when he can have all these picture perfect girls? (Bulimia)
In work
working on your requests rn i promise but life is being a bitch rn 🧚🏻‍♂️, requests are open
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naturesapphic · 24 days ago
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Hii would you be ok writing billie with a gf who has like really bad ocd and sometimes it just gets the best of her so it ends in billie comforting her
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Struggles
Billie eilish x ocd!fem!reader
Warnings: ocd, breakdown, hurt/comfort
Halloween/fall masterlist
Billie was out at finneas’s studio while you were at home doing your schoolwork, but it was getting to you. You have ocd and you’ve had it almost all your life. It gets really bad when things get overwhelming or stressful for you, like right now. You were finishing up a paper and nothing was being done. You couldn’t find the words to answer the questions that the paper was about and you kept messing up.
So you deciding to get up from your desk and start distracting yourself from it. Going downstairs, you started to clean the house and rearranging things, but that didn’t work. You were messing things up and you were starting to spiral. Shark came into the living room where you were at and sensed that you were getting upset so he let out a few whines so you would notice him. You looked down to see him and you gave him a small smile as you bent down to pet him.
He wagged his tail happily at you and you felt yourself calm a bit as you petted and gave love to shark. You stood up after your legs started to hurt and shark jumped up on the couch to lay down while you continued to clean. After cleaning for a bit you went back upstairs to try and start back onto your paper. A few hours went by and you were still stuck and you were spiraling bad. Hearing the door slam shut, you realized that billie has just came home and you remembered that you didn’t start dinner yet when it’s your night to cook.
You cursed to yourself and put your head in your hands, trying to calm down. Billie was steady calling your name but you weren’t answering so she went up the stairs and went into y’all’s shared bedroom to see you at your desk with your head in yours hands, freaking out. She immediately went over to you and got down on her knees in front of you. “Baby? Hey hey what’s wrong angel.” Billie said softly as she places her hands on your knees. You didn’t say anything and billie removed her hands from your face so you could properly look at her.
Tears were running down your face and your heart felt like it was about to explode in your chest. Billie felt her chest tighten as she watches you and she immediately stands up and picks you up in her arms. You clung onto her as you started sobbing into her neck, releasing all the stress and tension that was built up in your body. Billie didn’t say anything but sweet nothings in your ear as she rubs your back and runs her fingers through your hair. After a few minutes of crying, the only thing was heard was y’all’s breathing and your sniffles.
“What happened babygirl?” Billie asked you, still holding you tightly in her arms. “N-nothing is going right…I’m spiraling.” You mumbled into her shoulder and Billie hummed. Billie knew about your ocd and how bad it can get. You usually don’t have to say much to her and she will already know what’s wrong. You explained to her how you couldn’t get your paper done, you moved stuff around the house but then moved it back because it didn’t look right, then you started cleaning and that wasn’t working, nothing was working.
Billie listened to all of it and hummed every now and then to make sure you knew that she was listening. “You sure did have a tough afternoon didn’t you princess?” She said sympathetically and you nodded, fresh new tears threatening to spill once again. Billie went out the bedroom door and went downstairs to the living room where shark was still sleeping on the couch. She sat you down beside him and sat by you, pulling you into her arms again. “How about in a few minutes I’ll call in for dinner and we can watch one of your favorite shows?” She suggested and you nodded your head, a small smile appearing on your face.
“Yes please bils…” you whisper and Billie leaned down to place a gentle kiss on the top of your head, making your smile bigger. “Then it’s settled. I’ll go call our favorite vegan place and you put on your favorite show/movie okay princess?” She said and you nodded. Billie placed a soft kiss to your lips and went up from the couch to make the call while you turned the tv on. You didn’t know what you would do without your billie.
A/n: damn. I need someone to hold me LMFAO. Thank you anon for the request! I hope you and everyone else enjoyed! Remember to stay hydrated and to rest! Take care of yourselves. I love y’all :)
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The Arcana Mini-HCs: Brainrot's Masterlist, Pt 6
MC with trust issues lets down their guard
Thrift shopping with M6
When MC has a phobia of syringes
When MC is Asra's adopted sibling
How the M6 adventure at midnight (Vesuvia Weekly)
Giving M6 a crocheted bouquet
Cake frosting and M6
MC and M6 with opposite aesthetics
M6's familiar when MC's familiar is blind
Watching Titanic together
Flipping M6 off and running away
M6 when MC distracts them with a flirty gesture
When MC "falls" for M6
"Who's this 'pillow' you're cheating on me with?"
Calling the M6 "sweeter and finer than wine"
When MC shares feelings through touch
Seeing MC happy stim for the first time
When MC has OCD and likes to count
When MC's orphaned sibling shows up
M6 when their kid gets sick
When MC is really tuned in to nature
M6 when MC happy cries over their relationship
MC becomes a beast and needs true love's kiss
When M6 have a kid before MC
Painting Nails
When MC eats food off the floor
M6 waking up to a gift basket
MC needs to sail two years to visit home
M6 get a Parent's Day present from their stepkid
Throwing a surprise party for M6
M6 finding out someone else has a crush on MC
When MC loses an eye
When MC makes a cloud every time they sneeze/shiver
Giving M6 an anatomically correct heart
When MC says "help" in their sleep
M6 at a fair
Tricking M6 into holding hands
MC sits fully clothed in the shower
Calling M6's name to say "hi!"
"Can't take my eyes off you"
Running to M6 saying "Hide me!"
MC is scared of ghosts
Staring at M6's lips
Covering M6's face in kisses
The familiars adopt MC's new baby familiar
How M6 like their mangoes
When MC has braces
M6's secret insecurities (Vesuvia Weekly)
How M6 talk in their sleep (Vesuvia Weekly)
M6 helping MC with maladaptive daydreaming
When MC has dermatillomania/trichotillomania
Giving M6 flower crowns
Trying lipgloss flavors with M6
Pulling M6 closer by the waist
Randomly asking M6 "wanna make out?"
Giving M6 a kiss for good luck
M6's little food quirks
M6 as passengers in a fender bender
When MC (and familiar) cry chopping onions
What M6 study in college
M6 on "worthy or not worthy"
Comparing hand sizes
M6 and spiders
M6's bath/shower habits
Smelling M6's perfume
M6 skating/skateboarding
M6 find MC eating cake ferally
Giving M6 jewelry to match their eyes
Cradling MC like a baby
Asking M6 to reach something for you
When MC doesn't know how to read
M6 when MC is their apprentice
When MC forgets to use magic
M6 in a group chat
M6 startle MC's familiar into a wall
When MC is an amputee
Stealing M6's mangoes
M6 calling MC husband/wife/spouse
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