#not related to the boys!
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when im being asked a question, but i was busy daydreaming about __ x y/n
#actually mentally ill#relatable#explorepage#x reader#x y/n#fictional men have me in a chokehold#stranger things x reader#marauders x reader#slytherin boys x reader#anakin skywalker x reader#cillian murphy x reader#klaus mikaelson x reader#tom riddle x reader#draco malfoy x reader#leon kennedy x reader#bucky barnes x reader#tony dinozzo x reader#damon salvatore x reader#billy hargrove x reader#mattheo riddle x reader#lucius malfoy x reader#regulus black x reader#johnathan crane x reader#joe goldberg x reader#loki laufesyon x reader#sebastian sallow x reader#ominis gaunt x reader#steve harrington x reader#eddie munson x reader#gojo satoru x reader
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bro cannot enjoy his milk in peace
#ok but does anyone else thinking about the complicated relationship mob must have with milk or is it just me#like he has so much milk related trauma now#my poor boy#mob psycho 100#mp100#shigeo kageyama#mp100 dimple#ekubo#art#fanart#shitpost#meme#anime#treeart
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#dead boy detectives#charles rowland#and thats on 'being scared youll become your abuser'#which....i totally do not relate to. not at all. nu-uh
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Boat boys s10 dynamic is like this right?
Original by: @/laarems (source)
#the (relation)ship that built and sailed itself#joel and etho obsessed with each other?NO#IM obsessed with THEM#ethoslab#smallishbeans#boat boys#smalletho#hermitshipping#hermitcraft#hermitcraft season 10#hermitblr#mcyt#my art
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the last disco
#jamtams art#jamtam(fan)art#disco elysium#harry du bois#disco elysium skills#i put the skills in certain spots based on the placement of the apostles in leonardos original work#just a little fun thing :3#maybe i'll write up a little explanation later idk#also i put the lil like. skill selection crown?? above harry just cause i wanted. to#wanted to give him a halo or smth relating to limbic systen/ancient reptilian brain but neither rly fit? so crown it was!
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I just really like the trope of Danny getting summoned, alright?
——
After he shoved Pariah Dark in his coffin shaped locker what what Danny hoped to be for all of eternity, the half unfortunately inherited all of Pariah’s responsibilities.
“What was it again? With great powers comes great responsibilities?” Danny let his head hit the table with an audible thunk. He’s in his “office,” the ghost zone’s approximation of where he might be able to do work seriously. The house- the extension of his haunt- had added the room right next to his bedroom. Danny had to lift all of the paperwork from Pariah’s castle (that’s now also a part of what’s considered Danny’s but he doesn’t think about that) and move it to his main haunt.
He prayed to the universe at large to let him off. Danny hated doing homework- science not withstanding because at least he understood that- let alone an asshole’s centuries worth of work. Danny bemoaned the fact that he was elected the King. He didn’t even defeat Pariah all by himself, so why couldn’t the others do it?!
Like a wave of merciful fate, the beginning tugs of a summoning pulled at his core.
“Thank Ancients!”
Danny scrambled to grab a sticky note, unfortunately glowing green as things tended to in the Ghost Zone, and scribbled down that he’s been summoned and to not look for him until his vacation work was done.
With that note done, Danny decided to bring his A game to the summoning. Allowing his secondary form to wash over him, Danny quickly checked the mirror to make sure he was presentable. A bright glowing ice crown- not the crown of fire, because it was essentially useless without the ring and Danny wasn’t keen on being a king, let alone a near infinitely powerful one- settled across his brow showed his status. A cape, this form’s best feature, made of an expanse of galaxies, nebulae, and frost cling at the end was swept over his shoulders and pinned together with a cloak pin made of clusters of black holes.
A couple of additions to his normal hazmat suit and his trusty thermos at his side, Danny all but dove into the summoning magic with an excited whoop of glee.
As Danny got closer to the magic-made portal, he could hear the whispers of the living presences beyond it.
His summoners! Hopefully it’s not a cult again, even if he thought they were pretty funny trying to summon the king of the dead to kill more people. Not funny “haha,” funny weird.
How should he do this…? Scary? Funny? Oh! Or maybe he should ditch the crown!
Danny grinned, waving his hand to dispel the crown of ice. It was nice, but he was in a dungeon critter mood today.
“Oh, this is going to be gooood.”
Danny cracked his knuckles and put on the most dead-inside-and-outside expression he could manage, modeling it off of the Nasty Burger workers during closing shift. The halfa stepped through the portal.
——
“The ritual is completed! You will all face the might of Pariah Dark, the eternal king of the dead!” The villain of the week cackled as his cult cheered. Wonder Woman, scuffed and injured from the magical bolts these magic users had shot at her earlier, grimaced and raised her sword.
“We will defeat Pariah Dark,” she proclaimed. Her allies rallied at her proclamation and readied themselves for another fight. “This world will not bow to the likes of you!”
“We are all but mere ants before the king of the dead! Pariah Dark will bring forth the reckoning this shitty world deserves!”
“Actually, Pariah Dark’s kind of busy, so you’re gonna have to leave a message.”
Green Arrow’s arrow jerked towards the new voice. Batman paused, hand holding batarangs at the ready. He, out of all of them, knew better than to underestimate a young voice.
A gloved hand shoved through the green portal, using the edges like a door frame to heave itself through. A humanoid shape, with sharp ears all but crawled out of the Lazarus green portal. Batman wondered if this was what Jason saw when he came back to life.
"Lord Pariah Dark is busy?!"
The figure- a boyish not-human- heaved a sigh. "Do you people seriously think that the High King of the Infinite Realms isn't swamped with work?"
"And who are you supposed to be? His secretary?" Hal asked, Ring glowing and at the ready. Wonder Woman tensed and mentally struck Hal away from the list of people to consider for diplomatic missions.
"Me? I'm a glorified paper pusher." The being turned back to the cultists, his cape containing the universe swished behind him. "Did you have a message for Pariah Dark?"
"He was meant to rain down death and destruction!"
"Okay, first of all, I feel like you guys are missing a really important point." The being pointed at the cult leader. “It’s not called the King of the Dead for no reason, you know. Death comes for everyone eventually. Also, I have to do a seriously giant amount of paperwork every time one of you fruitloops gets the bright idea to cause an influx of deaths.”
Danny stomped across the circle, grabbed the collar of the cultist leader’s cloak and yanked him down. He shook him. “Do you people have any idea how annoying it is?! Huh?! Do you know how long the A-354 Form is?! Stop trying to get Pariah to kill people! I’m sick of the paperwork, dammit!”
"How- how did you get out of the circle?!"
The cultists and the heroes squared up, ready to fight the possible common enemy: Danny.
Danny is having the best time of his half life. Screw kingly dignity, Danny’s gotta de-stress somehow! He had a whole bag of complaints!
"You wrote the circle wrong, idiots! Ancients, are you people even literate? What even are those scribbles?" Danny kept shaking the cultist. Wow, what an amazing stress ball!
“Uh- hey, he looks kind of sick…” The Flash said, trying to be a good hero and mediate before escalating. Danny snarled and Flash held up his hands, gulping in fear as Danny’s eyes narrowed at him. “Did I… do something?”
“You,” Danny hissed. “You mother- fruitloop! Stop screwing with the timeline, you giant red-! Do you know how annoying it is to readjust the death count every time one of you little merry red jesters takes a jaunt through time and space?! Do you even know how many complaints I had to field?! Oh, boy you’re all going to regret summoning me today, because I’ve had a long time to think about what I’d do to everyone who made me work overtime!”
Danny bared his teeth, eyes sparkling with mirth as he froze the cultists.
"We're not letting you take over the world," Hawk-Woman said, raising her mace that pulsed with electricity.
Danny snorted to hide his wince. "I'm not interested. Just let me punch him once. Just once." Danny pointed at the Flash.
"Honestly, I can't even blame you," Black Canary muttered, fists raised.
"Wha-! Canary! That's so rude! You traitor!"
"Shouldn't have put skittles in my shoes then. Those hurt, Flash."
"Enough." Everyone shut up at the sound of Batman's command. "What do you mean they wrote the circle wrong."
Danny, who was watching the byplay with interest, shrugged. "They wanted to summon the Ghost King, right? We've had a... change of leaders recently."
"Who is the leader now?"
Danny waggled a finger at Batman. "Nuh-uh. I'm gonna collect my over-time compensation, which is punching the Flash, and then we can negotiate for information."
"Flash."
"I don't want to get punched, Bats!"
"The alternative is that I let the current Ghost King have a go at you."
"Flash."
"Oh my god, just get punched, Barry!" Danny heard Green Lantern Hal Jordan whisper.
"Ugh, fine. No one video this."
Immediately, three phones go up to record the Flash getting decked by a teenage looking ghost. Danny floated closer and wound his fist back, letting loose some of the ghost strength he normally keeps restrained. "This is for my overtime and for Clockwork, you jerk."
The halfa slammed his fist straight into the Flash's face, knocking him clear into the air. Superman catches him but Danny no longer paid attention to the Flash, petty vengeance enacted.
"Honestly, I don't have a problem with you as a person. You're kind of cool. Break the timeline again in the next three months, though, and you're on my shit-list."
"What do you want in exchange for information?"
Danny hummed. "Depending on the level of information, and I reserve the right to not answer any questions. For the name of the current Ghost King..."
He did want that new gaming console. And Jazz could use some help with her rent.
"I want $5,000 and a plate of really good spaghetti."
"I have cash."
Danny nodded at the Dark Knight. "You just carry $5,000 in cash on you? Who does that?"
"I like to be prepared."
"And he's rich," Superman chimed in.
The Flash reappeared with a plate of spaghetti from an Italian place he teleported to. "Here you go. Fresh, and pleasedon'tscrewwithmyafterlife."
Danny shoveled the spaghetti into his mouth, jaw unhinging like a particularly disturbing snake right before he dumped the whole thing- plate and all- down his throat. "Thanks! The food didn't even try to kill me this time! You're good."
"Does your food try to kill you all of the time?!" The Flash- Barry, apparently- asked.
Danny nodded as he took the cash from Batman's gloved hands. "Totally. It sucks."
"Identity." Batman demanded.
"Oh, yeah. The current ghost king is me."
"...What."
"You have been swindled. Bamboozled. Outwitted and outsmarted," Danny snickered, shoving the bundle of cash in his chest. "But seriously, I'm the king. We got rid of Pariah a while ago."
The crown of ice materialized.
"You said you were a glorified paper pusher!" Hawk-Woman chortled.
"I am! I'm pushing so many papers across my desk, it's unending, I swear!"
Batman growled. "You tricked us."
Danny smirked, "You got tricked." Red Robin, in the corner, snorted quietly. "Anyways, if you've got more interesting things around here, I'll considering busying myself with that instead of sentencing you to an afterlife of paperwork."
The adults straightened, grimacing. "Beast Boy is green," Hal offered up.
"Hey!" Beast Boy shouted, offended at the easy way Hal offered him up. He turned to Danny. "But have you ever seen a green chinchilla? Super cute. Watch!"
"Woah!" Danny clapped. Yes, he'll hang out with them before dragging himself back.
#danny phantom#batman#tim drake#dc x dp#the justice league#justice league and the ghost king#ghost king danny#superman#hawkwoman#shayera thal#beast boy's most effective attack is being adorable#red robin#red robin enjoying the weird ghost boy clowning his sad emo dad#hal being annoying but so relatable#green arrow
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I can’t believe I went through all of Season 2 assuming Nina was the stand-in for Crowley when you actually pay attention it’s so CLEAR that she’s Aziraphale. I was tricked by her spiky, sarcastic, cynical outer shell and lulled into a false sense of security by Maggie’s bubbly optimism and wholesome goodness, because on the surface they reflect the ineffable husbands perfectly, in their personalities, their aesthetics, even many of their actions and morals. but not, and this is the real key, when it comes to their “relationship”. but those first impressions really had me damn fooled.
I missed the blatantness of Nina’s “we’re just friends. actually we’re not friends. we barely know each other.” the same thing Aziraphale said in season 1. the way he still struggles to quantify their friendship when Nina asks. Nina’s sarcasm when Crowley asks about rain and awnings because it worked for him (we all know it LMAO). hell, that whole convo the girls have in the rain is so AziraCrow (“I know. I’m not your type” “...You have no idea” hits so much harder the second time, help meeeee.) “Lindsay” maybe being symbolic of Heaven and Aziraphale’s toxic relationship with them and their abuse? (the handwritten text messages in red pen make me think of angry notes on paperwork, anyone else?) because Crowley has never actually cared about what Hell thinks of him, just not getting into trouble (or him or Aziraphale getting hurt). Maggie is always chasing Nina. NINA NEVER GOES IN THE RECORD STORE. Just like Crowley always goes to the bookstore, to Aziraphale, Zira NEVER WENT TO THE FLAT (apart from The Swap but that doesn’t count imo). Crowley has always chased Zira, not the other way around. Always there to rescue him, always going to him for company, always relying on their shared connection, always US. OUR SIDE. All through season one, he comes to Zira every time to work together, never trying to work alongside Hell in any way that isn’t to save their skins or Earth, while Zira hides things from Crowley because he STILL thinks Heaven is ultimately good and will do the right thing if he can just show them. fix it from the inside.
Maggie working up the courage to finally say something, to put herself out there, while Nina is utterly oblivious and then when she does realise Maggie has feelings, becoming standoffish, putting up that barrier, fighting it, denying it, ITS SO CROWLEY AND AZIRAPHALE IN THAT ORDER. the way I was fooled into thinking Nina’s trust issues are Crowley because he does have trust issues ofc he does BUT Crowley has ALWAYS TRUSTED AZIRAPHALE. has always relied on him. has always been hurt when Aziraphale doesn’t immediately reciprocate the way he expects (the holy water request, the bandstand, the “off in the stars” etc). he’s always the one putting himself forward. Aziraphale has always been the one to second guess everything, to fight their connection, their similarities, their friendship. the girls really made me think it was going to be okay when they sat Crowley down, even as my inner sirens were going haywire about Metatron interfering, they were telling Crowley he just needs to open up and it’ll all work out BUT HE’S ALREADY AT THAT POINT. he may not say it, and by gosh is that part of their damn problem, but he’s always SHOWN IT. he’s not Nina who needs time to heal and recover from her broken trust, he’s always been Maggie believing it doesn’t matter, they’ll end up together in the end anyway AND I WALKED RIGHT INTO THE TRAP THAT THIS MEANT THEY WERE GOING TO BE OKAYYYYYYYYYYY
#good omens#good omens spoilers#good omens season 2#good omens 2#GO2#GO2 spoilers#ineffable husbands#not me going to my basically unused sideblog that isn't GO related because I NEED TO YELL THIS SOMEWHERE#I mean outside of the relationship thing there are so many ways#that Nina and Crowley line up and Zira and Maggie#but the girls story isn't about them as people#it's about this relationship the boys are tryna push on them and what that relationship reflects about the boys#anyway I'm on my first rewatch for all the clue I missed#so I imagine I'll only spot more clues to berate myself about as I go#HOW DID I FALL FOR ITTTTTT#I can't believe I was so blind#OFC the Disaster Puppy Lesbian was Crowley#and OFC the Emotionally Abused Tortoise was Aziraphale
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im finally getting out of my art slump so my style is getting a lil better/ more natural again
some doodles based on my gameplay of drv3 from last night,, im at the start of chapter 2 still (i already know all the trial outcomes but its fun anyways cuz i never watched/played it fully)
if you couldnt tell i am spending all my free time events with kokichi.. hes silly please.. i gave him a hammock and he was flabberghasted
#shuichi saihara#my art#drv3#kokichi ouma#PLEASE give me art ideas in my ask box especially drv3 related#saiouma#tell me if the japanese is wrong i beg im a beginner#text bubbles are of actual dialogue from the game#theyre so silly im losing it#danganronpa#drv3 art#gay people are REAL#NO LITTLE JAPANESE BOY! DONT GO INTO THE CASINO!
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being a girl includes staying up till 3AM bc it’s already past your bedtime to read more “x readers” because you know you’re going to miss your alarm anyway.
#life#being a girl#pedri x reader#footballer x reader#chandler bing x reader#blaise zabini x reader#ferran torres x reader#evan buckley x reader#jack grealish x reader#james maddison x reader#hector fort x reader#joey tribbiani x reader#joao felix x reader#jude bellingham x reader#luke dunphy x reader#mason mount x reader#monica geller x reader#pablo gavi x reader#pansy parkinson x reader#pau cubarsi x reader#rachel green x reader#slytherin boys x reader#reader insert#x reader#theodore nott x reader#relatable
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#dont get me wrong#i love my soft fluffy men#but sometimes a gyal needs toxicity and a strong chokehold#fictional men are better#actually mentally ill#toxic men#x reader#villain x reader#billy hargrove x reader#anakin skywalker x reader#regulus black x reader#joe goldberg x reader#geralt of rivia x reader#lucius malfoy x reader#slytherin boys x reader#klaus mikaelson x reader#bucky barnes x reader#draco malfoy x reader#damon salvatore x reader#loki laufesyon x reader#sebastian sallow x reader#mattheo riddle x reader#jonathan crane x reader#tom riddle x reader#severus snape x reader#foryoupage#tumblr fyp#explorepage#relatable#fictional men
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A dream land - DP X DC Prompt
Okay, so I was thinking about that episode "Perchance to dream" where Bruce is trapped in a dream world and this, even thought really different, came to my mind.
Danny is king or prince of the infinite realms. He's been working on personalizing/decorating his castle in the infinite realms. When he feels someone walking just outside the castles walls. The thing is, that someone isn't a denizen, they aren't in a corporeal body, but he can feel that they are very much alive and feel distinctly human. He approaches the person to ask why and how they are in the infinite realms, but they fade away before he gets the opportunity.
Clockwork, who was with him at the moment, tells him that the visitor from the living, was just the soul projection of someone that was sleeping, and then refuses to elaborate further. Since it's something that was to do with sleeping, Danny decides to go and ask Nocturn, it seemed like a reasonable assumption that he was the one at fault for the soul projection.
Contrary to what he thought, Nocturn informed Danny that Sleeping soul projection was a natural phenomenon that he didn't control. The land of dreams, ("My domain" - Nocturn reminds him), was in the infinite realm after all, and those who have been close to death sometimes slipped they're whole soul instead of just their mind, and ended up all over the infinite realms.
It isn't too different from a lucid dream for them, the body gets all the benefit of the sleep, the mind feels rested if they had a good time in the realms. Except, if they hurt their soul too bad during their little trip, it would have real consequences. Loosing memories, abilities regression, migraine, pain that reflects the soul damage, all either temporary until the soul healed, or permanent and deteriorating, and in some occasions finishing in the persons death. In the latter, the soul is usually too damaged and cease it's existence, or have enough ectoplasm and emotion to form into ghosts with crack cores whose existence is instantly in danger.
Danny clearly didn't like the image that was painted to him, so he asked Nocturn if there was really nothing that he could do. It took a lot of talking and convincing, but eventually Nocturn admitted he could be able to direct the soul projecting to appear on a certain place, but he refused to babysit anyone. Which was enough for Danny, all he needed to do was make another expansion in his castle.
He decided to make a garden to receive their soul projecting guests. The garden was enormous, with all kinds of spaced within it. Playgrounds, picnic spaces, soft benches, tables with ghost and space teamed board games, fountains, and of course, the beautiful flowers that surrounded and decorated the place. Once he got ghosts with gardening, protection and caring obsessions on the place to look out for the souls, he was ready to receive them. It took him by surprise the amount of people that came, the garden was never crowded, but was never empty either, and souls of all ages and places were visiting at all times.
He kept expanding the garden as he heard of new things their guests wished for. He enjoyed spending time in the middle of the garden where souls passed by but rarely appeared, it was calm, but not completly quite with the background noice of the soul enjoying their dreams, and he could do the more mundane king/prince work. Until, he starts getting a regular visitor on his little space of the garden.
Choose the DC character you prefer, my idea is for people who hasn't died in the past but has been in the doors of death (so died and came back would be disqualified but you do as you prefer), but I'm going with Tim.
The soul of a boy around his age appears just in front of him, as usual when he greets new arriving soul, he welcomes him with a gentle smile and tells him he is free to explore the garden. A ghost taker is assign to him. The soul, as usual, seems confused and like he wished to asks questions, but seems content to ask them to his tour guide, and Danny continues with his own duties.
But then, the same soul continues to appear in the same place every two or three days, they exchange greetings and every time talk for a bit longer before the boy leaves to explore once more. It's rear to have multiple visits from one soul, even more so for said soul to appear in the same place every time. By the four time, Danny decides to take a break on his royal duties and accompany his new friend.
~ They get close, and have cute scenes, Tim asks a lot of questions and Danny answers and not-answers a lot of questions ~
One day, Tim shows up as usual, but he is in full Red Robin costume, and well, Danny wasn't expecting an identity reveal.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
On the Bats side:
There's an attack of some villain that's able to put Red Robin (or character of your choice) on a sleeping beauty type of sleep while carrying a serious injury, were he stays sleep until teammates or backup gets him out of it. The event affects his soul, making him disconnect partially from the land of dreams and making his soul sleep project almost every time he sleeps.
Tim starts sleeping more often. It's worrying at first, Bruce being paranoid does every test in the book, despite Tim saying he's just finding sleep easier now. But, he was just affected by sleeping magic and suddenly his sleeping easier? Seems like a side effect, and that makes it worrying.
Tim's health in general improve, just like he's concentration and productivity. Who would have thought that working rested actually was more productive than working on less than three hours of sleep and missing obvious details and clues due to how tired you are.
With everything not only being okay, but better than before, paranoia about Tim's new sleeping schedule soon dies, and instead is replaced with teasing about how he used to refuse to rest kicking and screaming, and now he may sleep more than any of them.
On Tim's side, he's loving being able to soul project so often. He knew from the start he was in a different dimension, and he just wanted to know the hows, whys, and everything else. So far, he seems to do it at least once every three days, and he's even gone two times in a row a couple of times.
The garden had a lot of things to do, but Tim doesn't care about that, he's more interested in all the information he's getting. The first 3 times he was given different ghost nanny's, who were more focus on entertaining him and didn't really answer direct question. But then king/prince Phantom decided to accompany him personally, and everything went smoother. He was going back to get to know more about this new world, and maybe to know more about the cute prince/king too. He might also have gotten some better looking pajamas.
Now, he has a mission that takes more than a couple days with some people in his team that hasn't yet sen his face. He didn't realize how difficult it would be to do all nighters after getting used to a sleep schedule. He would usually try to go as long as possible without sleeping, but he decides that he should take advantage of the safety of where they're staying and sleep a bit too. He ended up soul projecting in full Red Robin costume. He tried to play it cool, maybe Phantom wouldn't know it was him.
"Red Robin, even if you didn't appear on the same spot as always, I can feel your soul. I know who you are."
#dc x dp#dp x dc#dcxdp#batfam#dpxdc#all i know about both dc and dp is from the fandom#dead tired#tim x danny#Fluff#They're in love#Tim is figuring the logistics of dating an interdimensional king/prince#Danny was considering when was a good time to tell Tim that they lived in the same dimension#Now that he knows his a vigilante#it might be easier to reveal.#Clockwork may be related as do why Tim appears in the same place everytime#Meddling ancients trying and succeeding to get their king/price a boyfriend#Why didn't Tim tell anyone about the dream land?#He's hyper independent and likes to work on his own cases alone#Besides#so far there doesn't seem to be anything dangerous about this#Just a cute boy Tim isn't ready to present to his family#if that is even possible.
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simon fucking riley.
#cod mwii#cod x reader#call of duty#i love you#big boy#cerebus.speaks✩#john soap mactavish#ghost cod#top male reader#cod mw2#— simon riley#simon ghost riley#simon riley x reader#amazing body#body types#viral#relatable#foaming at the mouth#busting out
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You're telling me I'm supposed to be looking at this fictional man and I'm NOT supposed to want to tenderly kiss his face and neck and tell him how pretty and wonderful he is??? cruel
#imagine your f/o#f/o imagines#f/o imagine#f/o#tagging cuz why not boy kissers may find this relatable
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Reverse trope
where instead of the Bats forgetting that they’re adopted (something actual adoptees do on occasion and is hilarious) they forget that some of them *cough Damian cough* aren’t
_______
Jason in the heat of a probably ridiculous argument: Yeah well YOU’RE adopted!
Tim just as invested in said argument: So are YOU! We all are!
Damian who had previously been quietly watching this unfold while he drank his tea: Actually I’m not
Tim and Jason who didn’t realize he was there but are already DoneTM: …… Damian continuing to sip his tea entirely unbothered: :)
Damian: Because I’m not an orphan-
Jason: ok, yoU KNOW WHAT-
____
or like in their group texts (that we know they have thanks to Nightwing (2016) #79)
*Steph changed the group chat name to “Bruce Wayne’s Personal Orpanage”*
Jason: Really?
Steph: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Steph: It’s the truth Damian: Both my parents are very much alive
Steph: Shhh you don’t count
Cass: Mine too Duke: Technically so are mine
Barbara: I still have a dad so there’s that
Steph: YOU GUYS ARE RUINING THE JOKE
Tim: Stephanie aren’t BOTH of your parents alive???
Steph: KNOW WHAT? FINE
*Steph changed the group chat name to “The Technicality Police”*
Tim: well that’s more accurate at least
Steph: :)
_____
Damian in his 10th argument with Tim of the day: That’s- this is-
Tim in full Antagonizing Big Brother mode: I’m listening
Damian -a Gen Z and best friend to Jon Kent- extremely frustrated: This is such Motherless behavior!
Tim taken aback: [voice cracking] W-what-?
Damian who didn’t mean to say that but doubling down anyway because his bloodline doesn’t believe in admitting mistakes: THIS! This is such Motherless behavior!
The rest of the family who is also motherless: :O
Cass whose been spending way too much time with Meme Queen Stephanie Brown and not involved in the argument but finding it entertaining regardless: [nodding along seriously] Facts
Tim: [visibly betrayed] CASS WHAT-
A video copy of the interaction gets sent out anonymously to the entire family. Barbara is the prime suspect but there is no proof as of yet (and they will never find any)
Steph, Cass, and Duke continue to respond “Motherless behavior” everytime one of the bats does something they deem questionable/insane. It is said often
It only stops when one night in the middle of patrol. Batman is in full Dark Knight mode (possibly in the middle of threatening someone) and descends from the ceiling into the middle of a warehouse drug deal, dark cape billowing out behind him-
and Steph just automatically whispers “Motherless behavior” forgetting her com was still very much on
She immediately realizes what she said and frantically apologizes but it’s too late.
Bruce just- Blue Screens. Completely stunned into silence
Dick -who was unfortunate enough to be the one teamed up with Batman tonight- is fighting for his life to choke back his laughter
Jason doesn’t even try to stop his and has collapsed to his knees from lack of air from how hard he’s laughing. Cass try’s half heartedly patting his back to help to no avail
The criminals are terrified into surrender from The Red Hood just laughing hysterically at seemingly nothing while Batman just Stands There
Damian ends up being the only one still functioning enough to continue arresting everyone, though he is privately amused and strangely proud
Tim and Barbara have saved both the com recordings and cowl footage to at least three different servers and sent it to absolutely everyone before Batman even recovers
Duke finds out second hand the next morning and is furious he missed the chance to see it in person. He declares he is moving to the nightshift so it doesn’t happen again. (He is all talk and goes to bed by 9 pm)
Bruce bans the phrase for life and promises swift and server punishment to anyone who dares to use it again
#Like it’d be so funny#Imagine them on mothers day#Damian at unnecessary volumes: I AM LEAVING TO GO TO VISIT MY MOTHER NOW#Damian: WHERE SHE LIVES.#His brothers on their way to the cemetery or smth: ._.#Damian still going regardless: BECAUSE SHE IS ALIVE#I just know Damian “Certified Mama’s Boy” Wayne would be such a menace about it#And Duke Babs Steph and Cass would so help fan the flames#batfam#dc comics#fanfiction#headcanon#chat fic#Can you tell I read them often#And yes adoptees forget they’re adopted#I have a friend who has on multiple occasions started to tell me about something that “ran in the family”/something in her family history#Before she’ll remember she’s not actually blood related#someone has probably already done this#But I still thinks it’s very funny#No I don’t think Jon would say motherless behavior to someone#But I do think he’d know the phrase and teach Damian#I just imagine he educates him on all the Gen Z lingo don’t ask why#crack post#100% a joke dont take it seriously
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Wei Wuxian Edition™️ Vol. 2
Vol. 1: x
#its our boi :3#hes too relatable i had to make anothaaaa#Wei wuxian#Wei ying#the untamed#wangxian#cql#mdzs#the untamed text posts#mdzs text posts#<3#lmao#lan wangji#lan zhan#mo dao zu shi#grandmaster of demonic cultivation#had to repost this ¿ im so confused so embarrassing lmao
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