#north dakota hockey

[offsidenewsco]

"So, the Blueshirts have added a strong defender to their bountiful prospect pool, and given a young player the opportunity to share the ice with one of his heroes. All in all, it’s another heartwarming draft for New York; Emery appears to be a seamless fit for the organization."

Read our profile of the #NYR's pick here.

[mainenorth]

project freelancer hockey team project freelancer hockey team project freelancer hockey team

[goalhofer]

2023-24 Bridgeport Islanders Roster

Wingers

#10 Kyle MacLean (Bernards Township, New Jersey)

#12 Otto Koivula (Nokia, Finland)

#18 Matthew Maggio (Windsor, Ontario)**

#26 Eetu Liukas (Kaarina, Finland)**

#28 William Dufour (Quebec, Quebec)

Centers

#9 Tyce Thompson (Oyster Bay, New York)*

#11 Tanner Fritz (Grande Prairie, Alberta)*

#14 Brian Pinho (North Andover, Massachusetts)*

#15 Samuel Asselin (Repentigny, Quebec)*

#17 Ruslan Ishakov (Moscow, Russia)

#21 Cole Bardreau (Perinton, New York) A

#24 Karson Kuhlman (Cloquet, Minnesota)*

#32 Jackson Cates (Stillwater, Minnesota)*

#33 Reece Newkirk (Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan)

#36 Jeff Kubiak (Bremen Township, Illinois) A

Defensemen

#2 Seth Helgeson (Faribault, Minnesota) C

#3 Robin Salo (Espoo, Finland)

#4 Dennis Cholowski (Langley, British Columbia)

#6 Vincent Sevigny (Quebec, Quebec)

#7 Grant Hutton (Carmel, Indiana)

#8 Paul LaDue (Grand Forks, North Dakota)

#20 Travis Mitchell (South Lyon, Michigan)**

#27 Aidan Fulp (Westfield, Indiana)**

Goalies

#1 Jakub Škarek (Jihlava, Czech Republic)

#39 Ken Appleby (North Bay, Ontario)

[olympeline]

Hetalia FACE family as classic Simpsons quotes:

Arthur: Alfred I told you not to bring guns to the dinner table!

Alfred: You said the breakfast table

Arthur: IT’S THE SAME TABLE

Arthur: I suppose we could get more involved in Alfred’s activities, but then I’d be afraid of smothering him.

Francis: Oui, and then madame guillotine.

Arthur: That’s not what I meant!

Francis: It was, cher, admit it.

Matthew: History is written by the winners, Al

Alfred: I thought it was written by losers

Arthur: *Bound for the couch* Only French history

Matthew: Papa, can we please listen to one story that doesn’t end up being about Alfred?

Francis: Of course, petit! Alfred was still having trouble in school, and Alfred-

Matthew: *Exasperated* Paaaa!

Alfred: Hey, he’s just giving the people what they want: Alfred by the ass load!

Arthur: *Holding a tray* Boys, you want some scones before you go to bed?

Al & Matt: AAAAAGGGHHHHH!!

Arthur:…

(He later did the chainsaw and hockey mask bit but the scone scream was louder)

Arthur: *Drunk sobbing* ARRGG I HAVE THREE KIDS AND NO MONEY! WHY CAN’T I HAVE NO KIDS AND THREE MONEY?!

Francis: *Coming in with Alfred* Sorry I’m late, I’ll start dinner-

Arthur: No need. Already made.

Francis:…

Arthur: *Defensively* Mattie loved it! Didn’t you, son?

Matthew:…

Alfred: How was it, Matt?…Good?

Matthew: It tastes like…burning

Alfred: *About Peter* Are you guys adopting another kid?

Francis:…Perhaps

Al & Matt: *Cheer and high five*

Francis: Oh sure for you two a baby is fun and games but for me it’s all diaper changes and night feeding!

Alfred: Doesn’t Dad do that?

Francis: *Darkly* Oui, but I have to hear about it

Arthur: Now boys, on your first day of school, I'd like to pass on the words of advice my big brother gave me.

Alisdair: Arthur, you're dumb as a mule and twice as ugly! If a strange man offers you a ride, I say, take it!

Arthur: Fucking traumatic childhood…

Quiz show host: Okay, the capital of North Dakota was named for what German ruler?

Alfred: HITLER!

[senditcolton]

You had to know this was coming. Cause. Duh.

Tyson and Maddie. Anything your heart desires here that you feel like sharing. Preferably not sad.

xx ���🏻💜

Hope It Never Ends

a/n: I love you 💜 anon for always reminding me how much I love these two. This is a little flashback moment to Tys and Maddie's past, back when they were teenagers in Kelowna. Back when things were simple but perhaps the beginning of something more...

Word Count: 2k Warnings: none that I can think of!

Sacred: (adjective) regarded with reverence. Synonyms include cherished, divine, revered.

There weren’t a lot of things that Madeleine Murphy considered powerful and important enough to consider sacred – except one tradition.

Summer evenings when Tyson and she would climb out of her bedroom window onto the roof, sitting on an old blanket, playing twenty-questions, and staring at the sunset.

Even though Madeleine always prided herself on her wordplay (she wanted to be a librarian after all), perhaps tradition wasn’t the correct term. There was never a specific time or date that this ritual happened. It was just something that they had been doing since they were 13, shortly after they met and realized that they were bound to be more than just schoolmates.

Madeleine showed him her discovery of how to remove the window screen, allowing her roof access the summer after they first met. Looking back, she did it because she wanted Tyson to think she was cool – what better way to get an adolescent boy’s attention than by doing something that you probably shouldn’t be doing? It worked and soon that was their go-to spot whenever they hung out.

The twenty-questions, however, was Tyson’s idea. It was a way to get to know each other but as a game instead of an interrogation. At first, all the questions were surface level: what’s your favorite color, what’s the best holiday, what’s the coolest thing you own? But eventually, both the location and the questions became deeper and more meaningful as time went on.

The roof of Madeleine’s childhood home became an oasis, somewhere they could sit and be alone and share without the pressure of parents or friends or teachers or coaches listening and potentially influencing their answers. It was a place of trust and truth.

Those moments with him became sacred to Maddie.

And this one, right now, she might soon consider to be the most sacred of them all. Because Tyson was leaving.

It wasn’t for another year, something she kept reminding herself when that fact popped into her head and took all sense of calm from her. He had committed to playing hockey in North Dakota starting in the 2016-17 season. This was still the summer of 2015. Tyson would stay here in the small town they shared together for another twelve months. Madeleine would still be able to sit with him on the roof for maybe another summer.

But there was an ache in her heart that told her this might be last.

“Oh, I got one,” Tyson’s voice dances on the summer breeze, pulling Maddie from her thoughts and back to the present moment, something she should’ve been focusing on anyway. “What’s the weirdest dream you’ve ever had?”

It’s almost immediate, the image that pops in her mind and she can’t stop the laugh and shake of her head as she considers telling him the answer.

“You’re going to think I’m crazy,” she sighs, her blue eyes bright as she looks over to him.

“I already think you’re crazy so what’s a little more weirdness?” Tyson gently teases, his easy joy relaxing her like it always did.

“Okay, fine,” she sighs, in part defeat and part disbelief that she was going to tell him this. “When I was six, I had a nightmare that I was being chased through the city streets by a giant wheel of cheese.”

“A wheel of cheese? Like a monster that looked like a wheel of cheese?”

“Nope, just a regular wheel of cheese that you’d see in a grocery store. And the way I escaped this wheel of cheese was by standing right where a triangle slice of it was cut out of it, so when it rolled over me, I was completely unharmed.”

If Tyson was keeping a serious poker face before, it crumbled at Madeleine’s explanation, his sputtering laughter making her cheeks heat in embarrassment.

“Wow, Maddie, that’s really terrifying.”

“I was six, okay!” she rebuts, her outrage ringing false as her own laughter paints the words. “And I think being chased is a very reasonable nightmare to have.”

“Yeah, but once you throw cheese into that situation, you’ve lost me completely.”

“You asked for weirdest dream not most realistic. What about you, Jost?”

“I don’t remember any of my dreams,” Tyson quips, that stupidly cocky smirk appearing on his face making Maddie scoff.

“What a cop out. Here I am, bearing my soul to you and you hit me with an I don’t know,” Madeleine says, her voice ladened with exaggeration.

“I can at least tell you that last summer, my mom tried to wake me up to go to the store with her or something and I said in my sleep – and I quote – but I don’t want to put up the Christmas lights,” Tyson replies, his own voice going into the grumbling whine as he relays his sleep-talking.

There is no stopping the laughter that falls from Maddie, the image perfectly clear to her as she had heard him mumble in his sleep multiple times during their previous sleepovers. Tyson just laughs with her before continuing.

“Like, it’s the middle of summer, Christmas is far away, I think you’re safe, bud.”

“You said no to your mom though? Impressive.”

“I didn’t say no, I just said I didn’t want to do it. There’s a difference, Maddie.”

Madeleine just hums a yeah sure sound, staring back out at the sun slowly sinking down, turning the skies a beautiful cotton candy pink.

These were the moments that Maddie would cherish forever; she thinks. No matter what happened, she would remember the evenings spent on her roof, her and her best friend’s laughter dancing and mingling in the air. But the knowledge of the possible ending hits her again, like a tidal wave crashing on her.

She would remember this forever but part of her didn’t want it to become just a memory. She wanted to be doing this with Tyson when they were in their twenties, in their thirties, up till the point that they couldn’t climb out of her bedroom window. The idea of a time without Tyson by her side was terrifying.

“What scares you most about the future?” she asks, her own racing thoughts forcing the question out of her mouth before she could stop to think it over.

Her blue eyes flit over to Tyson, the weight of her question fully registering, the smile disappearing from his mouth as his own gaze moves to look at the sunset. She can practically see the wheels turning in his head, can see him chewing over the possible answers that he could give her. Madeleine just keeps her attention on him, watching as Tyson’s shoulders raise in a sigh, his legs bending as he pulls his knees to his chest. Her heart tries not to ache at the sight of him looking so much like a little kid.

“I’m scared that I’m not going to be good enough,” he whispers.

Maddie can feel the honesty in his words and the genuine fear behind them. She doesn’t speak, just lets the silence linger, letting Tyson make the next decision; whether to deflect the question back to her or to elaborate. He chooses the latter.

“I feel like I’ve given so much of my life to this dream of playing hockey and I want it so badly but what if I never get there.”

“To the NHL?”

“Yeah, or what if I do but at some point, people decide they don’t want me anymore. I get traded or sent down to the minors or something else. I think that scares me more then never getting there. That there would be a moment, after all this hard work, where I’d have to accept that it’s not going to work out and I’ll have to give it all up.”

There isn’t really anything to say except false promises, promises that Madeleine knows she can’t keep. She couldn’t see the future, couldn’t tell Tyson that he would make it and that he wouldn’t have to give up playing hockey until he decided it was time. So, she just lets his words linger and keeps her eyes fixed on him, staring at his profile, memorizing the way his hair falls, the way he looks with his chin resting on his knees. It is a moment longer before Tyson sighs again, giving a small shake of his head, his body relaxing and stretching back out into its casual position before he looks back at her.

“Your turn.”

“I’m scared of things changing,” she answers immediately, the truth just tumbling from her lips like a waterfall. It’s her turn to sigh as she chews over her answer, her head slightly shaking at the ridiculousness of her fear before continuing.

“Like, I know change is a part of life and there is no use trying to resist is because things will change whether you want them to or not. But I like it here. Not just here in Kelowna, but here. This moment; hanging out with you, no curfew, no real responsibilities, no pressure. No worries about bills or relationships or jobs or school or any of that. I just want to keep a hold of these summer evenings forever. If I could repeat this moment every day for the rest of my life, I’d be content.”

Madeleine’s eyes turn to stare at the clouds now painted with the pastel hues of tangerine oranges and peach pink, the view just adding to the magic of this moment and just emphasizing how much of this was temporary.

“I just never want this to end,” she confesses, her words lingering in the evening stillness.

Tyson doesn’t speak immediately, just lets the silence fall, the only noise being the beginning chirps of the crickets. However, Maddie can feel his eyes trained on her face, seemingly memorizing the shape of her as she previously did to him.

“Well then, let’s promise each other something,” he finally speaks. The conviction in his voice causes Maddie’s gaze to turn to him, their eyes locking, and she is taken back by the seriousness reflecting in his pupils. “Let’s promise that no matter what happens, even if everything around us changes, we’ll still be there for each other. Okay?”

“Okay,” Madeleine whispers, her voice soft but the certainty behind her agreement strong.

The quiet peace washes over them again, their promise floating on the wind as they both lean back, looking out at the sunset, content to be together but lost in their own world, their own fears, their own minds. But it only lasts for a moment, the physical and mental space between them shattered as Madeleine feels the brush of a pinky against hers. She glances down to see Tyson’s finger reaching out to hers, caressing the side of her hand, a quiet coax. Her eyes dart back to his face but his gaze remains staring towards the sun. As if he was worried on how she’d react.

Madeleine assuages those concerns by linking her pinky with his, the childhood symbol of a promise never to break. A smile pulls at her lips when she sees Tyson sigh, his brown eyes looking towards her, a matching grin tugging at the corner of his lips. She doesn’t hesitate to lift their intertwined hands, her lips pressing against her own knuckles as a way to show she meant it, an action which Tyson mirrors. Their eyes lock and it takes every bit of Maddie’s willpower to stop her heart from leaping from her chest. Because the way Tyson is staring at her – with the gentle assurance and adoration – makes everything feel different.

This wasn’t the first pinky promise that they’ve made in the four years of knowing each other. But in this moment, they weren’t just a couple of kids making deals for the hell of it.

This meant more. It wasn’t something frivolous or flimsy – it was a vow, an oath, to the universe, to each other.

And it was theirs to keep. Forever.

[acurlygirlamy1]

DIARY OF A SNOW SHOVELER:

Moved to North Dakota this fall. We heard that summers are fun and winter is beautiful. We think there is no more beautiful a place in the whole world!

December 8 - 6:00 PM It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Grandma Moses print. So romantic, we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!

December 9 - We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the whole world? Moving here was the best idea I've ever had! Shoveled for the first time in years and felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks.

This afternoon the snowplow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a perfect life!

December 12 - The sun has melted all our lovely snow. Such a disappointment! My neighbor tells me not to worry- we'll definitely have a white Christmas. No snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter, that I'll never want to see snow again. I don't think that's possible. Bob is such a nice man, I'm glad he's our neighbor.

December 14 - Snow, lovely snow! 8 inches last night. The temperature dropped to -20. The cold makes everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away, but I warmed up by shoveling the driveway and sidewalks. This is the life! The snowplow came back this afternoon and buried everything again. I didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shoveling, but I'll certainly get back in shape this way. I wish I wouldn't huff and puff so.

December 15 - 20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2 extra shovels. Stocked the freezer. The wife wants a wood stove in case the electricity goes out. I think that's silly. We aren't in Alaska, after all.

December 16 - Ice storm this morning. Fell on my ass on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt like hell. The wife laughed for an hour, which I think was very cruel.

December 17 - Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for 5 hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. Nothing to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate her. Guess I should've bought a wood stove, but won't admit it to her. God! I hate it when she's right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room.

December 20 - Electricity's back on, but had another 14 inches of the damn stuff last night. More shoveling! Took all day. The damn snowplow came by twice. Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but. they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow blower and they're out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the city will have it done and bill me. I think he's lying.

December 22 - Bob was right about a white Christmas because 13 more inches of the white shit fell today, and it's so cold, it probably won't melt till August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to piss. By the time I got undressed, pissed and dressed again, I was too tired to shovel. Tried to hire Bob-who has a plow on his truck-for the rest of the winter, but he says he's too busy. I think the asshole is lying.

December 23 - Only 2 inches of snow today. And it warmed up to 0. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this morning. What is she, nuts?!! Why didn't she tell me to do that a month ago. She says she did but I think she's lying.

December 24 - 6 inches - Snow packed so hard by snowplow, l broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the son of a bitch who drives that snow plow, I'll drag him through the snow by his balls and beat him to death with my broken shovel. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling, and then he comes down the street...at a 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been! Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open our presents...but I was too busy watching for the damn snowplow.

December 25 - Merry f---ing Christmas! 20 more inches of the damn slop tonight - snowed in. The idea of shoveling makes my blood boil. God, I hate the snow! Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's a fricking idiot. If I have to watch "It's A Wonderful Life" one more time, I'm going to feed her through a chipper shredder.

December 26 - Still snowed in. Why the hell did I ever move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting on my nerves.

December 27 - Temperature dropped to -30 and the pipes froze; plumber came after 14 hours of waiting for him, he only charged me $4,400 to replace all my pipes.

December 28 - Warmed up to above -20. Still snowed in. The BITCH is driving me crazy!!!

December 29 - 10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave in. That's the silliest thing I ever heard. How dumb does he think I am?

December 30 - Roof caved in. I beat up the snow plow driver, and now he is suing me for a million dollars, not only for the beating I gave him, but also for trying to shove the broken snow shovel up his ass. The wife went home to her mother. Nine more inches predicted.

December 31 - I set fire to what's left of the house. No more shoveling.

January 8 - Feel so good. I just love those little white pills they keep giving me. Why am I tied to the bed ???

-Author Unknown

[floridaboiler]

DIARY OF A SNOW SHOVELER:

Moved to North Dakota this fall. We heard that summers are fun and winter is beautiful. We think there is no more beautiful a place in the whole world!

December 8 - 6:00 PM It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Grandma Moses print. So romantic, we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!

December 9 - We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the whole world? Moving here was the best idea I've ever had! Shoveled for the first time in years and felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks.

This afternoon the snowplow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a perfect life!

December 12 - The sun has melted all our lovely snow. Such a disappointment! My neighbor tells me not to worry- we'll definitely have a white Christmas. No snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter, that I'll never want to see snow again. I don't think that's possible. Bob is such a nice man, I'm glad he's our neighbor.

December 14 - Snow, lovely snow! 8 inches last night. The temperature dropped to -20. The cold makes everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away, but I warmed up by shoveling the driveway and sidewalks. This is the life! The snowplow came back this afternoon and buried everything again. I didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shoveling, but I'll certainly get back in shape this way. I wish I wouldn't huff and puff so.

December 15 - 20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2 extra shovels. Stocked the freezer. The wife wants a wood stove in case the electricity goes out. I think that's silly. We aren't in Alaska, after all.

December 16 - Ice storm this morning. Fell on my ass on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt like hell. The wife laughed for an hour, which I think was very cruel.

December 17 - Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for 5 hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. Nothing to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate her. Guess I should've bought a wood stove, but won't admit it to her. God! I hate it when she's right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room.

December 20 - Electricity's back on, but had another 14 inches of the damn stuff last night. More shoveling! Took all day. The damn snowplow came by twice. Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but. they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow blower and they're out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the city will have it done and bill me. I think he's lying.

December 22 - Bob was right about a white Christmas because 13 more inches of the white shit fell today, and it's so cold, it probably won't melt till August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to piss. By the time I got undressed, pissed and dressed again, I was too tired to shovel. Tried to hire Bob-who has a plow on his truck-for the rest of the winter, but he says he's too busy. I think the asshole is lying.

December 23 - Only 2 inches of snow today. And it warmed up to 0. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this morning. What is she, nuts?!! Why didn't she tell me to do that a month ago. She says she did but I think she's lying.

December 24 - 6 inches - Snow packed so hard by snowplow, l broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the son of a bitch who drives that snow plow, I'll drag him through the snow by his balls and beat him to death with my broken shovel. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling, and then he comes down the street...at a 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been! Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open our presents...but I was too busy watching for the damn snowplow.

December 25 - Merry f---ing Christmas! 20 more inches of the damn slop tonight - snowed in. The idea of shoveling makes my blood boil. God, I hate the snow! Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's a fricking idiot. If I have to watch "It's A Wonderful Life" one more time, I'm going to feed her through a chipper shredder.

December 26 - Still snowed in. Why the hell did I ever move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting on my nerves.

December 27 - Temperature dropped to -30 and the pipes froze; plumber came after 14 hours of waiting for him, he only charged me $4,400 to replace all my pipes.

December 28 - Warmed up to above -20. Still snowed in. The BITCH is driving me crazy!!!

December 29 - 10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave in. That's the silliest thing I ever heard. How dumb does he think I am?

December 30 - Roof caved in. I beat up the snow plow driver, and now he is suing me for a million dollars, not only for the beating I gave him, but also for trying to shove the broken snow shovel up his ass. The wife went home to her mother. Nine more inches predicted.

December 31 - I set fire to what's left of the house. No more shoveling.

January 8 - Feel so good. I just love those little white pills they keep giving me. Why am I tied to the bed ???

-Author Unknown

[forever-eternal]

Whoops, sorry

This is arcade prompt anon

I wanted to see generally wanted to see states that aren’t talked about much and I think you know who they are? It’s basically the midwestern states

Thank you for the ask, Lovely Anon! I’ve included the following States:

North Dakota - Andrew

South Dakota - Aiden

Nebraska - Maxwell

Kansas - Evan

Minnesota - Jasper

Iowa - Caleb

Missouri - Owen

I didn’t do every Midwestern State, but I hope you enjoy nonetheless!

——————————————————

“Alright,” Adam hums, looking the seven States— all shifting in their seats in excitement— through the rearview mirror, “Remember the rules: No theft, no destruction of property, and please don’t get into a fight with young children.” He side-eyes Robin at the last sentence, but his wife only smiles innocently from the passenger seat.

“We have a limit of five hours, alright?” Adam crosses his arms, “So make sure you’re all wrapped up by then, okay?”

Simultaneous nods, and excited chatter consumes the vehicle as Adam pulls into a parking spot. The van doors swing open, each of the seven States tumbling out.

Minnesota— Jasper— shoves his way out first, “Move it!”

Next are the twins, North and South Dakota— Andrew and Aiden— tumbling out and landing in a heap on the asphalt,

“Get off!”

“Let go of me!”

Nebraska and Kansas— Maxwell and Evan— slip out next, taking a wide step around the tussling twins as Robin climbs out of the passenger seat and comes round.

Missouri— Owen— is the next to exit the vehicle, snickering quietly as the Dakota’s are pulled apart by their mom, though the two redheads continue to snarl at each other.

Finally, Iowa— Caleb— steps out, holding the door open for Adam, their father. The older man grunts as he steps of out the drivers seat, the door closing shut behind him.

“Alright, you all have your money and you know the rules.” He says, making a small shooing motion with his hand, “Off you go.”

With that, the twins stop fighting— instead, they start bolting across the parking lot, chanting in unison.

“CHUCK. E. CHEESE! CHUCK. E CHEESE!— STOP COPYING ME!”

“No fighting!” Robin yells over their own chanting, “Or the two of you will be sitting with me and your father instead!”

The twins shut up.

For now, at least.

———————————————

“I struggle to believe that people seek this place out for the food.” Robin hums, nose slightly scrunched in disgust as she watches a family at another table devour their pizza, “I find it barely edible.”

Adam hums from across from her, eating his own slice of the pepperoni pizza on the table between them.

“It’s fine.” he says, but Robin just scrunches her nose at him instead.

“You’ve eaten mud before, dear, forgive me if I do not trust that coming from you.”

Adam just hums.

On the other side of the arcade area, Andrew and Aiden are kicking at each other’s feet as they play DDR, the only Chuck E Chees to have that machime.

“You suck at this, Andy!”

“Oh, shut up!”

Max has been at the pinball machine for thirty minutes, and has developed an audience of preteens.

“See, ya just gotta practice! Then you’ll get reflexes faster than the ball itself!”

Caleb has hidden in the skytubes, and is currently conversing with several young children.

“What? No no, the T-Rex is so overrated! Velociraptors are cooler!”

Evan and Owen have been play air hockey, niether willing to let the other win, and have amassed a crowd of onlookers.

“Think we should finish up soon, eh?”

“First to ten points?”

They each only have two points, scored early in the game.

Jasper had been spinning the ticket wheel, landing on jackpot at least five times, and is now at the prize counter. There are three kids following him.

“Aight, whatchu wanna get? I got enough to get a bit for all four o’ us!”

———————————————

“Did you all have fun?” Adam asks as they load back into the vehicle later that evening.

A chorus of ‘yes’s, with several items from the prize counter held tightly as they buckled back into their seats.

“I am making a proper pizza when we get home.” Robin huffs, sliding into her own seat.

Several cheers sound from the back seat.

“The pizza is awful here.” one of them huff, and Robin smiles smugly at Adam.

The man rolls his eyes, starting up the engine.

“I thought it was fine.” he sighs.

A snicker from the backseat as Andrew leans forwards slightly, “Dad, Ian once gave you rock soup and you ate it. You don’t get a say.”

The man rolls his eyes, and pulls out of the lot.

[thefutureiswhat]

New Fargo Season 5 character portraits, via the FX website. Official character descriptions under the cut.

Dorothy "Dot" Lyon: Depending on who you ask, "Dot," portrayed by Juno Temple, is a wife and mother, a member of the PTA, a fighter, survivor or a tiger. She’s tenacious to almost a delusional fault, never giving up no matter how impossible the circumstances. Ultimately, she’s a mama bear with a lion’s heart.

Roy Tillman: “Roy Tillman,” portrayed by Jon Hamm, is one of those constitutional sheriffs, a rancher preacher, defender of the American gospel. A man who works from sunup to sundown shepherding God’s land. In Roy’s own reality, he is the law and therefore is above the law; he’s the judge, jury and too often the executioner.

Lorraine Lyon: “Lorraine Lyon,” portrayed by Jennifer Jason Leigh, is CEO of the largest Debt Collection Agency in the country, with two billion dollars in annual revenue. Lorraine is poised, regal and opinionated. She’s also a huge donor to any candidate or cause that she believes in, regardless of political affiliation (read: anyone that can be helpful to her in the future).

Wayne Lyon: “Wayne Lyon,” portrayed by David Rysdahl, has the forced cheer of a man whose mother raised him with a thick brew of disappointment and guilt. Now he owns a car dealership and three quarters of a fishing boat. A sweet guy who doesn’t match up to society’s (or his mother’s) definition of masculinity, his ideal evening is playing sock hockey at home with his daughter, Scotty.

Gator Tillman: “Gator Tillman,” portrayed by Joe Keery, is a handsome charmer, the way the snake in the garden was a charmer. He’s a sapling struggling to grow in the shadow of an oak, desperate to prove himself to his larger-than-life father in the absence of a mother’s love. With daddy issues up there with Oedipus Rex’s, Gator wants to be a winner but unfortunately doesn’t know what the word means.

Witt Farr: “North Dakota Deputy Witt Farr,” portrayed by Lamorne Morris, is the guy when you look up the word “reliable” in the dictionary, you see his picture. He splits the check down to the cent, not because he’s cheap but because he’s fair. He’s dogged, earnest and Minnesota Nice.

Indira Olmstead: “Minnesota Police Deputy Indira Olmstead,” portrayed by Richa Moorjani, is a practical woman – socks before shoes – and good at puzzles, which may have led to her career in law enforcement. She struggles to manage her finances while supporting her husband Lars and his delusional dream of winning the Masters Golf Tournament.

Ole Munch: Age unknown, birthplace unknown. On any given day, “Ole Munch,” portrayed by Sam Spruell, looks as though he could be 30-60. Some say he has always been here, blowing through the American landscape – the dark shadow waiting for us at the end of the hall. He’s carved from stone, relentless as the sea, the forces of physics don’t apply to him.

Danish Graves: “Danish Graves,” portrayed by Dave Foley, is Lorraine Lyon’s in-house counsel and primary advisor. A country club type, who has never been in a real fight, but sees himself as a winner, when clearly Lorraine is the heavyweight champion and he just holds her spit bucket.

[dennisboobs]

I wanted to dig into the Sunny the 13th promos a little bit, because I think they're a really great subversion of expectations that a lot of people have about Always Sunny and Dennis' character in general.

Looking at the comments on various platforms from around the promos were released, a good number of people seem to have taken the promos as if Dennis has "finally snapped" and is going to kill the gang. He is, after all, wielding an axe, wearing a slasher-esque hockey mask, and appears to be threatening harm in all of the promotional images.

But in the video promos, he's more akin to a ghost than a slasher villain, trying and failing to get the gang's attention, for the seven minute Paramormal Paddy's promo. Several times over the course of the promo, he is actively scared by the things happening in the bar, wheras the rest of the gang barely even acknowledges it.

He's the one being pursued in all of the promos, not the other way around. Pursued by his friends' parents, pursued by the Waitress, pursued by Margaret McPoyle. In Dennis' Double Life, he tries to own up to his behaviour and commits to becoming a father, but in doing so, he is running away from his old life, and it all still follows him.

If listening to the conversations that the gang is having, you can also clearly hear them discussing whether or not Dennis actually killed Maureen. Dennis isn't technically there to defend himself, but the general consensus is that he did (even though Dennis originally denies any involvement, and his name was cleared).

In the production script for The Gang Gets New Wheels, they assume Dennis has killed Mandy and Brian Jr. and that is why he's come back to Philadelphia and decided to raise his son "from a distance". Given the gang's perception of him, and his apparent track record with killing Maureen, this would be a fair assumption, but not once does he raise his axe at them, or even make any move to threaten them at all.

In both the Ponderosa Wedding Massacre and Making Dennis Reynolds a Murderer, Dennis' secrecy and suspicious behaviour stems from not wanting others to know that he had sex with Maureen. I don't believe he killed her, and I don't believe he killed Mandy and their son either. I also don't believe he'd kill the gang. Besides, as we know from Mac is a Serial Killer, axes are too messy.

At the very end of the promo, Dennis walks toward the gang with his axe lowered, and Dee turns around to look at him, implying that they knew he was there the entire time. This aligns with their lack of interest in his absence in The Gang Gets New Wheels.

Throughout the promo, he's seen sitting at the bar alone, in one of the booths, rolling across the floor in the chair from the back office, watching them from afar, staring into the camera. He's bored. He's lonely. He's being left out of the gang's conversations. This can easily be seen as a representation of how he felt in North Dakota.

So of course he's wearing a mask, leaning into their perception of him as a psychotic killer, it's easier than being honest and vulnerable. Better than telling them that he came back because he missed them.

[doghartzy]

“#wrote a college entrance essay about this once” re: rpf research excuse me WHAT can you elaborate please 😭 (i say as someone who has also written some unhinged essays)

okay in my defense i didn't actually talk about rpf explicitly, but i did write about how one of the big draws of hockey for me was all the minute details and research rabbitholes you could get absorbed in. it's funny to look back on now because i think my understanding of hockey has come a long way, and also i'm kind of a completely different person than i was, lol. i'll put a few sections under the cut just for fun :3

But in late November of my ---- year, I turned on the television to watch a hockey game. It was the Flames and the Senators -- not exactly a nail-biter. I knew what to expect. I’d been to a college hockey game once at the University of North Dakota, and I’d been casually interested. But I certainly didn’t count on the Ottawa Senators setting the starting point of a great epoch of my life. The thing about hockey is that, leaving aside everything else about the sport -- statistics, personality, fanaticism, gameplay -- hockey is fun to watch. It’s fast-paced but easy to follow. All you have to do is keep track of the puck. Stoppages aren’t too common, but if they do happen, it’s probably because a penalty has been called, or because of a scrum, which both lead to more interesting circumstances. In short, hockey held my interest, and outpaced my notoriously short attention span. At least, that was how it started.

apparently i was rly trying to keep that harvard admissions officer on their toes lmao

Hockey culture is an unmitigated disaster. Awash with misogyny, masculine posturing, glorification of violence, and a thriving disrespect for the civil rights of minorities, it’s easy to brush hockey off as another antiquated hold-out of gladiatorial sports. Fans live and die for the blood of it. It’s especially easy to do so as a queer woman, someone who is definitely unwelcome in central hockey circles. It took me about ten minutes to understand that hockey Twitter, at least, was not worth a second of my time. But I hadn’t gotten as far as making it through an entire Senators game just to give up now. And finding other avenues of building community was easier than I thought. The Internet, it turns out, is shockingly versatile. Just as white male hockey fans all tend to congregate in the loud, wide-open spaces of fandom, the rest of us found areas out of view of the mainstream gaze. Within Tumblr tags, Discord groups, and even fanfiction archive forums, the women, hockey fans of color, and even us queers began to find each other. It was easier, then, to know where to start. In short order, hockey turned from something I watched as stress relief after a long school day to something I knew about. The people I talked to were knowledgeable, and the research I did on my own -- as was my wont -- helped substantiate. First it was about the teams, and then, when I had satisfied my knowledge there, the players. The politics. The rules, the statistics, the prospects. The slow stop-start of change initiatives like the Hockey Diversity Alliance. It turns out that hockey is an unquellable fount of things to learn, and it quickly became a way to collect things to know.

it's interesting to look back and see which things i felt it was important to highlight, especially given all the things that have happened in recent years with hockey culture. also please disregard all the identity flashing, i WAS trying to get into college, after all.

i go on to talk a bit about the demographic layout of the nhl & the draw of european leagues, plus why i started learning russian (to read kirill's insta posts), but that's the rpf-related section. if i were to rewrite this essay today it would be a completely different look at the world of hockey and its current landscape, but i'm giving myself some grace for having committed the crime of being 18 and not very smart.

[ya-pucking-nerd]

it’s always the boy next door - t.jost

A/N: Hi!! It's me! I'm @ilyasorokinn mystery fic writer as a part of @antoineroussel winter fic exchange! I do apologize for posting this so close to the deadline, but I hope you enjoy!!

Warning: alcohol consumption, some minor swearing

Buffalo, New York. Stereotypically one of the coldest cities in the United States. Typically, people visit in the summer, but more so for Niagara Falls. Or they visit in the winter because of the skiing. People don’t generally move to Buffalo, especially after 7 feet of snow had just fallen. Nevertheless, you watched through the peephole in your apartment door as movers entered the apartment across the hall with boxes of belongings.

You texted all your friends and received responses similar to the ones you were thinking of yourself. 

“Who moves to Buffalo in the middle of November?” “Do you think they know about the snow?” “Why now? People don’t usually get job transfers until after the new year.” 

Dismissing all your friends, you thought it might be nice to make a meal for your new neighbor. Moving is hard work; the last thing people feel like doing after moving into a new apartment is making dinner. So, you decided on a safe lasagna. When it cooled down, you grabbed your keys and brought it over.

After knocking, you heard a crash and a “Shit!” You had to bite on your bottom lip to hush yourself. The laughter soon died in your throat as the front door opened, revealing your new neighbor.

“Tyson?!” you exclaimed, probably annoying your neighbors. “Oh my god! Why are you here?”

“Y/N.” Tyson looked shocked. He looked nearly the same as the day he left you.

**Flashback**

You and Tyson were both 18, just graduated from high school. Tyson was ready to begin training and playing for North Dakota. His dream of becoming an NHL hockey player was so close to coming true. On the other hand, you had your sights set on the University of Toronto. Their business program was one of the top programs in Canada. It broke your heart to leave Tyson. 

In the two weeks you had left with Tyson, you spent just about every minute with him. You took his parent’s boat out on the lake. You slipped a case of beer past your parents and drank with all your friends. And he kissed you on the last day, at the “goodbye forever Tyson” bonfire. He was your first kiss. That kind of stuff made an impression. 

And then, he left. The texts were constant, detailing his day and how much he missed you and home. And then, they became less frequent. And then they stopped. Except for the odd “happy birthday” text, you and Tyson never communicated. You blamed yourself for becoming so attached. After all, you were half drunk, feeling a range of emotions because Tyson was leaving. It probably didn’t mean anything to him, even though it meant the world to you.

**End Flashback**

Tyson was still standing in front of you, mouth open.

“Are you going to invite me in? The lasagna’s getting hot.” you joked. He nodded his head, still in disbelief. 

Tyson’s apartment was beautiful. Your apartment view was a nice pretty brick wall, but his view was the skyline of Buffalo. He had all modern appliances, a huge living area, and what you assumed was a giant bedroom. You were so busy admiring the view that you didn’t notice Tyson staring at you. 

“Tys. This place is amazing!”

He scratched the back of his head, finally looking around, saying, “Yeah, I guess.”

“You guess? Tyson, my view is a brick wall.” You hoped Tyson got the hint that you wanted to spend some time in his apartment. With him. 

He laughed, then opened the lasagna. “Y/N, this is a lot of lasagna for one person. How much do you think I eat?” 

“Tys, you can just save some for leftovers.” You said quickly, forgetting that he had moved in that day. “Y/N, I don’t have a fridge yet!” He laughed. He pointed to the fridge-sized space between the cabinets. You hadn’t had the chance to look at his kitchen. “It’s not getting delivered until Tuesday.” 

“Wait, Tyson. Why are you here? Did you get traded?” 

“Minnesota put me on waivers. Crazy thing is they didn’t even tell me until it happened. I’m just glad I was picked up. Would’ve been embarrassing, eh?” He shrugged his shoulders. Instantly, you knew it was a sore subject for him, understandably so.

“Well, it’s getting kind of late, Tys. But I’m glad I came over. I missed you. Maybe whenever you’re free next, I can show you around?” You picked at the ends of your shirt, nervous that Tyson caught the way your voice strained when you said, “I missed you.” 

“I’m free on Thursday night.” He was smiling. “My first home game is Friday, too. Do you think you could come? You can even bring some friends. I’ll get you seats. I just…” he trailed off.

“Tys, of course I want to come. I have two friends. Would you mind if I invited them? I’d love for you to meet them.” You replied, filling in the space. You assumed he wanted to say he wanted someone familiar cheering him on in his first game for his new team.

Blushing, Tyson nodded his head. He pulled out his phone and handed it to you. “I got a new number when I moved here. I’ll text you the tickets for you and two friends. And, then, after the game, you guys can meet me in the tunnel.” You typed in your number and gave it back before engulfing Tyson in a hug. “Thanks, Tys. I have work in the morning, but I’ll give you a tour of the city Thursday night.” 

That night, you couldn’t sleep. Tyson Jost was your new neighbor. The Tyson Jost that you kissed when you were 18. You must have had the worst luck, running into the guy who broke your heart even though it was never technically his to break. Or maybe it was the best luck. 

~~ Thursday evening came. You did have a meeting but slid it to a remote Friday morning meeting. While you worried that you were turning back into your 18-year-old self with a massive schoolgirl crush on your best friend, you swallowed your feelings. All you wanted was a nice night out. You haven’t seen some of the attractions you planned to show Tyson tonight. You only knew of them. 

It was cold in Buffalo, a whole 8°F. You were bundled in all your warmest winter clothes waiting in the lobby of your apartment complex for Tyson. He met you on time, and you left the complex chatting about your week since you last saw each other.

You found your car in the lot, and you half-expected Tyson to laugh at your silly old car. The buttons stopped working to unlock your car, so you had to use the key to open it. It smelled a little musty from the old man you bought it from. The maximum speed on the darn thing was about 50 miles per hour. But you loved it more than anything because it was your first adult purchase without your parents’ help.

But Tyson didn’t laugh. He smiled when you told him stories about your car. And he tapped the dashboard and said, “Good job” when you parked in a parking lot of your first tourist destination—Canalside in downtown Buffalo.

You told Tyson that before you became so busy with work, you used to take your daily jogs here. It was beautiful in summer but even prettier in the fall as the leaves turned orange and red. 

Next up, you walked to the Liberty Building. The statues on top of the building were lit up, which made them sparkle if you looked at them just right. 

As you walked through the streets of Buffalo, you started shivering. Tyson grabbed your hands. “Y/N! Your hands are freezing.” And with that, he took both hands and cupped them with his larger ones, blowing his warm breath on your hands. He closed his hands around yours for a few seconds while gazing into your eyes. At that point, you were so close to just smashing your lips together, but you knew you couldn’t. 

He didn’t deserve that. His ex-best friend comes onto him two days after he moves to a brand new city with brand new teammates and brand-new expectations. No. You couldn’t do that to Tyson.

You walked and talked for about an hour. You were beyond freezing, even with Tyson holding your hand in his. You unlocked your car. The drive back to your apartment complex was pretty quiet. Tyson was fidgeting with his hands. 

“Y/N?” His voice was low, almost like a whisper. “I have a question, and you can totally say no. I would understand.”

“What’s up?”

“The Sabres are having a holiday party next Saturday. Would you come with me? I just want to make a good impression. I know we haven’t really been close, but I could use a friend. And I can introduce you to the guys tomorrow night at the game. Then, it won’t be so awkward.” 

You nodded your head, thinking about the offer. “I can. Don’t you think it’ll be weird, though? Did you tell the team you’re bringing someone?”

“I didn’t tell them. I was hoping I could tell them you’re my girlfriend. I know it’ll be weird, but I really want to make a good impression. Investors will be there and love seeing guys have good girlfriends.” 

You tossed the thought around and found yourself thinking back to that summer he kissed you. If you pretended to be his girlfriend, you would, at minimum, receive a forehead kiss. The deal sounded good to your 18-year-old still-had-a-crush-on-Tyson self. You couldn’t turn this down, even if it was fake.

You nodded and said, “Yeah, I’ll go with you and be your fake girlfriend, Tyson.” 

“Thanks, Y/N. It means a lot, and if you ever have an event and need a date, I’ll be there. Pinky swear.” He held up his pinky, and you took your hand off the wheel to lock your pinky fingers together. 

~

Friday night was here. Lexi and Marco, the two friends you invited with you, met right after work so you could all drive together to KeyBank Center. They spent the whole trip teasing you about your new neighbor. You understood, but at the same time, you knew that the chances Tyson liked you were slim to none. 

In his first game as a Sabre, Tyson got in a scrum. It was nearly a fight if the refs hadn’t interfered. He kept smirking on the bench and chewing on that damn mouthguard. He picked up the habit in high school, and you couldn’t get enough of it. 

Your emotions were out of control. You were proud of Tyson for showing his loyalty to his new team, but you hated when he got in fights. You always wished that hockey would be a no-contact sport. 

You, Lexi, and Marco flashed your shiny passes to the security guard, and he let you down towards the waiting area for friends and family. You paced around, seeing a few women and children, most likely the wives of the Buffalo Sabres. They seemed to all be in a little bubble like you were peering into something you would never quite get to be a part of. 

Tyson had to do media. Of course, he did. He got in a scrum in his first game. The media was going to eat him up. The newest darling of the Buffalo Sabres. This meant that it took a little longer for him to find you. Most of the men had come out of the locker room, met with their significant others, and left. 

When he finally came out, he was sweaty but had the largest smile. He beelined straight for you and gave you the biggest hug you’ve ever been given. Tyson dropped his bag, wrapped his arms around your waist, and lifted you up. He breathed deeply and simply wouldn’t let go. Lexi and Marco were sharing knowing looks, but you couldn’t even bring yourself to care. 

“Wanna go home?” Tyson mumbled into your shoulder. You nodded but looked back at Lexi and Marco. They mouthed, “Go!” You mouthed back, “Thank you,” before going with Tyson when he suddenly grabbed your hand. You weren’t sure what was going on, but you suddenly felt a blush across your cheeks. Using your other hand, you untucked some of your hair from your ear in an effort to conceal the blush. “In case someone’s in the parking lot,” Tyson explained after he cleared his throat. 

He dropped your hand once you got to his car. You felt sad but then had to remind yourself that this whole thing was fake. Everything was fake. The drive home was silent, but neither you nor Tyson filled the silence. You were falling back into that comfort of two best friends. You knew you had a crush on Tyson, but this fake dating thing was going to mess with your head. Here you were, blurring the line between friend and boyfriend, but Tyson didn’t even seem fazed. 

That night, you went to sleep so incredibly confused. 

~~

The rest of the week went by quickly. Tyson had a quick trip to Boston and down to the Rangers but then came back up Thursday night. Friday was an odd day off. The guys had gone to TopGolf in the morning. You were at work and then had to go pick up your dress. It was a long navy blue dress with rhinestones lining the small slit against your right knee. You were planning on wearing some silver jewelry. 

Tyson knocked on your door right as you put your left heel on. You hobbled to the door. It would be a painful night in these shoes, but you would do anything for Tyson. 

When you answered the door, Tyson was left speechless, running his eyes over you. 

“You look good – I mean incredible. You look incredible, Y/N. Sorry, just forgot what words were.” He looked great in a light grey suit with a navy blue dress shirt to match your dress. 

“You look great, too, Tyson.” You gave him a hug, grabbed your clutch, and walked out with him. He grabbed your hand on the way out. 

The event went well. You mostly talked with the women of the Buffalo Sabres, or as they called themselves, the Lady Buffs. 

Tyson was as sweet as could be. He was always around, asking if you needed a refill or just keeping his arm around your waist. You got pictures together with people that asked, and he told everyone you were his girlfriend. He was the perfect fake boyfriend.

But, of course, all good things must come to an end. You left the event as the donors and important executives of the Buffalo Sabres began leaving. You wanted to make an impression and not leave early like a few younger players did. You knew Tyson wanted to show how serious he was about Buffalo, and you wanted to play the role of Tyson’s girlfriend perfectly. Maybe psychologically, it would make him want to keep dating. 

You and Tyson held hands the whole way to your apartments. He noticed you didn’t have a jacket to keep you warm, so he draped his suit jacket over your shoulders. He really was the best fake boyfriend. Tyson stopped you before you could keep going back to your apartment. 

“Y/N, do you want to come to mine? I just wanna wind down, and it’s easier with a friend. I can get you a glass of wine if you want.”

You smiled and nodded your head. He opened the door for you. The apartment was slightly more disheveled than when you had seen it last. He had been busy decorating and purchasing furniture.

You shook off your shoes and Tyson’s suit jacket, then followed Tyson further inside. You were lost in thought. You were trying so hard to push off the thoughts that this felt so natural it could have been real. But it was all fake. Tyson made it explicitly clear. He wanted to wind down with a friend. 

He led you to his bedroom and sifted through his drawers. He gave you a pair of old Avalanche sweatpants and a North Dakota sweatshirt. 

“You can take the bathroom,” he said softly. You missed the way he watched your form walk into the ensuite bathroom.

When you walked back out of the bathroom, Tyson was gone. You found him, shirtless, in the kitchen holding two bottles. You were still reeling from all the feelings you’d felt throughout the night. 

“Red or white?” His voice interrupted your thoughts. “Red,” you answered back. He nodded his head and poured you a glass. You grabbed the glass while he kept the bottle in his hand and grabbed a beer with his other. He nodded towards the couch. He grabbed the remote, opened Netflix, and put on a random show that neither of you was particularly interested in.  

You fell asleep on his couch that night but woke up in Tyson’s guest bedroom with a blanket and a hangover. But there was a water bottle and a bottle of Advil on the nightstand next to your fully charged phone. He was so thoughtful. But the gig was up. Why was he still performing boyfriend duties? 

You slipped out of the guest room and met the smell of bacon. Tyson’s head popped around the corner. He was smiling and listening to music through headphones.

“I didn’t want to wake you with my loud music. How do you like your eggs?” His head bobbed to the beat of whatever song he had going on.

“Sunny side up, please, Tys. Thanks. You know you don’t have to do this, right?”

“Y/N, you had at least three glasses at the party and one when we got home. Don’t even tell me your head isn’t pounding so hard you’re leaning forward at a 45-degree angle.” he laughed. 

After breakfast, you went home. You were still wearing Tyson’s clothes, and he didn’t stop you from walking out the door. Everything just felt so confusing. You decided taking a nap would temporarily ease all of your worries.

~~

It was pretty easy to avoid Tyson after the Sabres’ party. He had an 11-day road trip that wouldn’t bring him back to Buffalo until December 23rd. It was easy to text him, “Busy with work stuff!” because you didn’t have to look at his face. You were an absolute sucker for him.

Tyson texted you on Christmas Eve.

Tyson: You’re ignoring me :( Come hang out with me.

Y/N: Am not. Was busy. You come here. Your place doesn’t have any Christmas decorations :p

Tyson: On my way!

You turned on Christmas music and waited for Tyson to burst through in Tyson fashion. Sure enough, he opened your door two minutes after you sent the text.

“Y/N, it’s really not safe to leave your door unlocked. Someone could steal you.” It’s a shame he didn’t know he had already stolen your heart.  

You handed him a mug of hot chocolate to shut him up for now.

“Why didn’t you go home for Christmas, Tyson?” 

“Didn’t work out. And no one really wants to visit me here in Buffalo. Besides, who would you spend Christmas with, then? Who would you watch all your movies with you? And how would you get any presents?” He knew those were your favorite parts. And gosh darn it, it felt right to spend a Christmas with Tyson even though your fake dating façade was done with. 

You huffed and grabbed the remote and turned on your favorite Christmas movie. Tyson grabbed your legs, swinging them into his lap. He began to rub small circles on your ankle, leaving you unable to focus on the movie. 

The night carried on, several more mugs of hot chocolate drank, and a few shots of peppermint schnapps snuck in, too, but you always ended up with your legs on Tyson’s lap. 

You ended up falling asleep again. This time, you woke up cuddled with Tyson. You were both positioned in a sitting-upright position, but your head was on his shoulder, his arm wrapped around your shoulders, and your legs were tangled together. Your head was spinning once again. How did you end up like this?

You didn’t want to wake Tyson up. It was Christmas, after all. You let him sleep for about thirty more minutes before gently lifting his arm off your body.

His half-asleep subconscious felt this and pulled you closer to him. “Not yet,” he grumbled. He nuzzled his face into your hair and sighed deeply. “Let me just pretend this is real for a little longer.” 

His words shocked you. You bolted straight up. He realized what he had said and took a deep breath.

“Merry Christmas, Y/N. Also, I’minlovewithyouandIwasjusttooafraidtotellyou.” Your eyes got even wider if that was even possible. “I’ve probably been in love with you for a while. I don’t know. You make me feel happy and safe. And that’s like girlfriend feelings. And I like it. And I like you a lot more than being my friend. I know I’ve only been around for a few weeks, so there’s no obligation for you to return my feelings. Would you wanna give it a shot, though?” 

Your answer? Smashing your lips to his. It was just like the movies—fireworks in your belly and warmth spreading over your skin. Tyson grabbed your head and pulled you closer, only allowing you to separate when you were begging for air.

“That’s my answer then, eh?” You playfully whacked him with a throw pillow. 

“Shut up,” you grumbled before leaning in again.

“Wait, hold on! I gotta get something!” He left the apartment and returned with a wrapped box and a card.

“Tys! I didn’t think we were getting each other something! I feel so awful!”

“Just read it, Y/N.” He looked absolutely giddy at the thought.

The card read: Dear Y/N, I’m so glad that I found you here in Buffalo. I thought that I would never see you again after that summer before I left. You’re truly a blessing to have in my life. You keep me sane, and I don’t think I would’ve handled the move to Buffalo without you. I appreciate you beyond words can explain. Thanks for spending Christmas with me. Love, Tyson.

Tears welled up in your eyes. Before you could even speak, Tyson handed you a tissue. And then the box. You carefully opened it. It was a little robot?

“There’s two robots. And you can draw on their bellies. And what I draw, you’ll see on your screen until you decide to draw, and then I’ll see it on my screen. No matter where we are. Like if I’m on a road trip. I thought it would be nice.” 

It was the most thoughtful gift you’ve ever received. You hugged him tightly, so glad you were allowed to do it for as long as you pleased. You kissed his nose in appreciation before tackling him into your couch for some Christmas morning cuddles. 

~~ The end <3 

I really do hope you enjoyed!!

Tagging some extra moots who might enjoy: @jostystyles @2manytabsopen @fallinallincurls @slapshot-to-the-heart​ @typical-simplelove​

[goalhofer]

2023 IIHF World Juniors Slovakia Roster

Wingers

#9 Adam Zlnka (Sioux Falls Stampede/Detva)

#10 Filip Mešár (Kitchener Rangers/Spišská Belá)

#14 Adam Sýkora (H.K. Nitra/Piešťany)

#15 Dalibor Dvorský (Allmänna Idrottsklubben Ishockeyförening/Zvolen)

#19 Samuel Honzek (Vancouver Giants/Trenčín)

#20 Libor Nemec (Rauman Lukko/Bardejov)

#22 Alex Čiernik (Södertälje Sportklubb/Wolfsburg, Germany)

#25 Frantisek Dej (H.K. Slovan Bratislava/Bratislava)

Centers

#13 Robert Baco (Moose Jaw Warriors/Košice)

#18 Servác Petrovský (Owen Sound Attack/Prešov)

#21 Peter Repčík (Charlottetown Islanders/Košice)

#26 Marcel Stefancik (Luleå Hockeyförening/Brezno)

Defensemen

#3 Simon Becar (Corpus Christi IceRays/Trenčín)

#4 Maxim Štrbák (Sioux Falls Stampede/Košice)

#5 Dávid Nátny (H.K. 21 Prešov/Martin)

#7 Šimon Nemec (Utica Comets/Liptovský Mikuláš)

#12 Pavol Funtek (Imatran Ketterä/Bratislava)

#16 Simon Groch (H.K. Spišská Nová Ves/Liptovský Mikuláš)

Goalies

#1 Patrik Andrisik (H.K. Brezno/Ilava)

#29 Matej Marinov (Fargo Force/Nitra)

#30 Adam Gajan (Green Bay Gamblers/Poprad)

[https-chaos]

Random hc:

North Dakota/South Dakota/Minnesota.

Cozy winter vibes, outdoorsy summer vibes

Year-round lake fishing/ice fishing trips

Hockey boyfriends that share one brain cell when they're together

You've seen those hand holding mittens, right? They have two because Minnesota has two hands <3

They're cuddling "for warmth" but they're all in their underwear and the window is open 🙄

[goddessofthedawn]

been a while since i talked about my books on here but it was my birthday last week so you could buy them as a late birthday present like, if you want. or if you have ku you could read them as a late birthday present if you want. anyway. i got something for everyone. i publish like six books a yea rin various series.

first up you got the pentalogy of hell, with five books in it (iscariot, forty days, lake of fire, the false prophet, son of perdition). if you like huge casts of characters from various time periods because like, they're all in hell, one of the main characters is from the 12th century but he's been dead forever and his best friend is a juvenile delinquent from 1994 so he's got a weird understanding of the world (he eats a kiwi like an apple at one point). anyway. lots of characters. diversity also. in terms of like. everything? i guess? also way less religious than it sounds. really this was created by an atheistic 14-year-old in 2011 who was terrified of the thought of nothingness after death because she's pretty sure that's what's going to happen. but it's chill.

next up abnormal murders. i call this 'stupid-ass murders' in my heart and my hard drive. first book is serial killers with cookies, second is morph suit murderer. i am currently writing the third book, flip flop felony. they sound ridiculous but like, they're pretty dark. the main character is slowly going insane. she loves vigilante justice and everyone around her is Tired.

third up is the tinon trilogy. this is my attempt at fantasy. three books, obviously, it's a trilogy: circus wings, royal blood, bandit born. my fun way to describe this one is "environmental activist lesbian princess fucks things up for everyone." moving on.

the AUGHTS BOYS. oh holy shit you guys, this one is my baby. there will be, by the time it's done, if it's ever done, at least twenty books in this fucker. these books do not need to be read chronologically, and you don't actually even need to read them all, if you don't want to. they're more companion novels than anything. the first one is one more sad song, which follows the stupidest kid in the world as he tries to like, skateboard and be jealous of his best friend kevin getting a girlfriend because he's in love with kevin and has been for like his entire life. the second book, the horror at camp new woods, is a slasher where everyone dies. the third book, right or wrong, follows this kid being friends with Matt the Douche, who is the only common thread between all the books as of right now, and then matt bullies some kid to suicide. uh-oh. that's not good. and the fourth book, hit or miss, is sort-of a direct sequel to one more sad song, so MAYBE read omss first, but it's about this high school hockey player dealing with his ex-boyf becoming a pro skateboarder (lol, guess who that is) and also winning state hockey and also dealing with matt the douche, again. these books either take place in ohio, minnesota, or north dakota, and if it's north dakota, it's gonna be a horror novel. guys i love these fucking books so much.

then vendettic! vendettic is the only series that i have written that i will never ever add anything to ever. it's a trilogy: spahn, sacrifice, sunset. it's about heavy metal in the early eighties and demon shit and they're fun. a little experimental with the writing. main character is the stupidest bisexual to ever live.

and of course i have standalones.

columbiner is about a kid who moves to a new school and gets involved with this kid who is a columbiner. it is my school shooting book.

the crucifixion of craig knox is like, loosely based on the case of the west memphis three. if you don't know aobut the west memphis three, look them up and read about them. i wrote the first draft of this book, 50k, in four days. then i wrote a second draft, 50k, in twelve days. then i printed both drafts out and made a frankendraft which i tehn rewrote it was a whole process.

beyr is like, a side story for pentalogy of hell. you don't need to read poh to read this but it is essentially jus tlike. backstory for one of the characters. that 1994 juvenile delinquent.

carl & jimmy is like... sort of... based on the american serial killer carl panzram. basically what i did was i learnd that carl panzram did, when he was a teenager, run across north dakota burning down churches with a friend and so i made it the 70s and less serial killer-y. i think this is probably the worst book i've ever written.

like hell is one of my favorites. it's about these three dudes who live in poverty and one of them is in a very abusive situation and as i put it, it's about "revenge, friendship, and killing your mom's boyfriend."

and i have three short story/essay collections: life in anachronism, rewind, and graduation day.

so yeah. check 'em out. let me know if you have any questions.

[hopenobodyeverfindsthis]

My Top Ten Books of 2022

I read more than 100 books last year, and I thought it would be a useful exercise to list my top 10 favorites that I read for the first time if only so I can reflect a little and gush about my passion for books.  This is in the order I read the books; most of these books are so different it would be really hard to put in any real order (warning: it’s an eclectic list):

1. She Who Became the Sun by Shelley Parker Chan: This was the first book I read in January of last year.  It’s set in the 1300s in China; I remember it being advertised as similar to Mulan, which doesn’t really do the story justice, other than that the main character is born a girl, but lives as a man and becomes a military general. It was so much more than a Mulan adaptation; and it is quite dark. In particular, I loved the dynamic between the two main characters: they are on different sides of the war, but two sides of the same coin; they both don’t quite fit into society’s expectations of gender.  

2. Transcendent Kingdom by Yaa Gyasi:  Gyasi is probably my favorite author I discovered this year; both Transcendent Kingdom and her other novel, Homegoing, are absolutely amazing and I cannot recommend either enough.  Transcendent Kingdom is about a neuroscientist who is also the child of African immigrants who is studying the science of addiction.  The story reflects on how her family has been impacted by addiction and the immigrant experience.  The prose is absolutely beautiful and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about this story since I finished it.

3. Parable of the Sower by Octavia Butler: I cannot believe I waited until last year to read Butler; her writing is as impressive as I’m sure you’ve already heard.  There’s not much I can say about Parable of the Sower that hasn’t been said a million times (all deserved), but I will say that I usually hate dystopias, even vaunted ones such as 1984 and a Brave New World. I read Parable of Sower fully expecting to hate it as well, and left simply blown away (and somehow even oddly optimistic about the future of humanity.)

4. The Night Watchman by Louise Erdrich: This is the third book I’ve read of Erdrich’s and my favorite, though I’ve loved everything she’s written.  This story is based on the real life story of the author’s grandfather.  The story involves several characters living in reservation in North Dakota and their fight to lobby for their rights land and their identity.

5. Heated Rivalry by Rachel Reid:  Look, I’m not going to try to justify this; I just love hockey and I love rivals to lovers and I love hockey romances and this one is the creme de le creme; it was written specifically for me.

 6. The Locked Tomb Series by Tasmyn Muir: I read several fantasy series last year, and I liked plenty of them, but the Locked Tomb is the one I can’t stop thinking about.  The characters are all super weird and unhinged and awful and I adore them all.  Their relationship dynamics are problematic and toxic and ridiculous and juicy.  I cannot succinctly describe the plot in any way that would make sense. I cannot wait for the final book.

7. Young Mungo by Douglass Stewart: This book gutted me; I rarely cry while reading books and I had to put this down so I could lie in a ball.  It’s a coming of age novel about a young queer boy coming to terms with his identity in set in Glasgow in I think the 1990s.  If you choose to read this book, please look up the content warnings, it is not in any way an easy read, but it did have a surprisingly hopeful ending, even if I was crying.

8. The Falling in Love Montage by Ciara Smyth: This is another surprising addition to the list; I am no longer really the target audience for YA, and I had pretty much sworn off YA romance after disliking a few others. But, I decided to pick this up on a whim and I’m so glad I did.  It is a very sweet wlw romance and coming of age story, but what really stuck out to me was the main character’s struggles with her mother’s early onset Alzheimer’s and how that affects her life.  I read plenty of very good wlw romance (Deliliah Green Doesn’t Care and a Restless Truth are two more I’d highly recommend) but this one stood out.

9. The Narrative of the Life of Frederic Douglass, American Slave by Frederic Douglass: I have read a good number of historical fiction novels which show the horrors of slavery, but while many of those are very very good, I didn’t really realize the extent to which none can really compare to reading a first hand account of the experience until reading Douglass’s work.  Like everyone, I learned about Frederic Douglass’s life, but sadly was never required to read anything he wrote in school.  He is an amazing writer and storyteller and a truly remarkable person.  Everyone should read this book at least once.

10. Frankenstein by Mary Shelley: I had read part of this book in high school, but never actually sat down and read the whole thing.  I’m not usually a fan of horror, and I was worried it wouldn’t be my thing.  However, I shouldn’t have put this off so long.  Mary Shelley truly is the mother of science fiction and Frankenstein is an unforgettable experience.