#need to do a character study on him
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yes house md as a show is outlandish and insane. house is literally a truman show of his own show. background characters are made out of cardboard, the walls are glass, he is just allowed to bully patients and his coworkers for funzies. but like there is also a deeply realistic element to house as a character. his actions are in line with his life, his backstory, and with his predicament. his chronic pain which lead to an opioid addiction, his childhood trauma, his trust issues that have definitely been shattered throughout his life leading to his cynicism, his refusal to seek mental support. of course the one constant and true trusting relationship in his life will also be codependent. this all makes sense. but this is also a show where house gets shot, gets recruited by the CIA for an episode, goes to jail multiple times. but it’s also a story about a deeply damaged man making the best of what he has and also learning to accept love? oh yeah and this is also a sherlock adaptation.
#i’m normal about house md#house md#this show is insane#this show will be the death of me#gregory house#need to do a character study on him#james wilson#to be loved is to be changed#how is this show real#and bbc sherlock did it worse#this show is from 2004#what the hell#hate crimes md#the medical malpractice universe#house md ended before gay marriage was legalized#house and wilson were life partners#hilson
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Manfred Von Karma did not burn Phoenix's letters to Miles.
Like, I'm not even saying this to defend Manfred's character (though the fanbase does get a little crazy with what he actually did and didn't do) I'm saying this because that's not canon. I'm not sure it was even possible in canon.
Phoenix didn't write letters to Germany. He didn't know Miles was in Germany, let alone Von Karma's address. He didn't even know who Von Karma was until Edgeworth told him about Manfred in Turnabout Goodbyes.
In the game canon, Miles just stopped showing up to school one day. All Phoenix seemed to know was that he transferred schools suddenly. He didn't know why or where to. Remember, Phoenix didn't even hear about DL-6 until Turnabout Sisters when Maya mentioned her family's involvement.
Even in the anime canon (I haven't watched the anime in a while so I might be off about this) where Phoenix and Miles get a chance to properly say goodbye, Phoenix still doesn't have a direct means of contacting him. His best way of doing so was dedicating a song through the radio using Signal Samurai codenames and hoping Miles would hear it.
Phoenix mentions trying to contact him several times when explaining their relationship to Maya, but this was after finding out Miles was this "Demon Attorney". Miles would have to be at least 20 at this point in time, living back in California with at least a few trials under his belt. With how young he reached success, it's not impossible Miles was living on his own at the time. Even if he wasn't, I doubt Manfred was going through this grown adult's mail.
No, what the game seems to be implying is that Miles ignored Phoenix. (Maya even says, "I guess he didn't want to hear from his old friends.") And I don't think this was out of hatred or anything, I think Miles just wanted to forget his past entirely because even the good memories of his childhood would be bittersweet at best.
And to be honest that makes it even more tragic to me. Why do we need Manfred to intercept their connection when Miles' trauma and guilt complex is already doing that?
I like to think Miles knew Phoenix would be asking questions if he ever responded to those initial attempts at contact. Questions he of course doesn't want to answer because they'd at best open old wounds or at worst risk his childhood friend finding out he might have committed patricide.
I also like to think he knew Phoenix of all people would stubbornly try to find the answers Miles wouldn't willingly give because he literally mentions Phoenix always being "single minded in his work" and "always seeing things through to the end". If anyone was going to press and bring those uncomfortable and painful memories out in the open for the sake of "helping him", it would be Phoenix Wright.
Why do we need Manfred to take away all that complexity and tragedy? That is such a waste!
#also Manfred didn’t know who Phoenix was#even when they were opposing council he didn’t recognize him outside of court#yes it's fine to bend canon when writing fanfic of course#but like it's so overdone and accepted as canon#just...guys there is so much angst and amazing character study RIGHT THERE#why do we need a villain to do something so petty when there's enough angst in canon characterization#god if i could write maybe I'd make a fanfic about this fhfhdh#feral yapping hours#manfred von karma#miles edgeworth#phoenix wright#wrightworth#narumitsu#ace attorney
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you know. I think the reasons it feels so literally narratively wrong when people refer to charles as being straight (such as in interviews where his love life comes up and so on) are that A) he’s never deemed outright straight in the show, so it’s just an assumption that he must be straight by default (which is silly in a show like this), and B) what he says following edwin’s confession. I know I’m biased, but even when I try to look at it as neutrally as possible, the way he reacts in general and the specific words he uses just don’t sound right when you imagine them being said by a Totally Definitely Straight guy.
first of all if you actually listen to it instead of absorbing the scene superficially it’s not particularly a rejection at all, and the actors have stated that themselves– it’s not him saying no, it’s him saying “I can’t give you an answer right now, but I will eventually”. that’s not an interpretation, that’s literally just the truth of what he said (and again, the actors agree). can you imagine a straight guy saying that, or possibly even more damning, “we have literally forever to figure out the rest [“the rest” meaning anything that goes beyond the kind of love charles already solidly has for him]”.
imagine you’re a straight man who’s unwaveringly confident in his orientation and your gay best friend confesses his feelings for you. you would not respond with the implication there is a “the rest” to figure out. since the main, obvious obstacle would be your solid lack of attraction to men, that’d probably be essential to your response– it wouldn’t be a “I can’t say–“ it’d be a “I can’t be–“. and on top of all that, I feel like the whole thing would have to sound far more apologetic– “I’m sorry, I love you and that’ll never change, but I just can’t love you the way that you love me.” something like that, right?
tldr: this is a rare instance in television where assuming a character is straight by default makes Less sense than the alternative. and charles’ choice of words in the confession overtly suggest that he is, at the very least, unsure of his orientation.
#rambling#thinking about this cause I saw another post about how weird it is to see people assume him to be straight and consider his being bi#more of a fandom headcanon- ie; less legitimate. and also that he just seems bi to such an extent that it doesn’t feel like a headcanon–#and I am here to say that yeah. he feels that way for a reason. and that reason is because he has not been portrayed in this show as a#straight character. like just flat out. that’s not to say he’s being overtly portrayed as a bi character (yet) either BUT I think it is#completely within reason to say he has been overtly ambiguous. and rarely does that mean a character is going to end up being straight.#anyway I have brainrot I need to go. do something. and get off my phone probably#charles#charles rowland#dead boy detectives#IN MY DEFENSE I am literally a film studies major. analyzing characters and scenes and etc. is kinda. what i do
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This half-foot. Dandan.
Looks preety similar to this lady here (I'll put them together so you see):
Half-lidded eyes, black hair&eyes, small eyebrows, curly hair... Dandan's skin is lighter probably because of low sun exposure (dungeon), and he has tons of freckles because he preety.
This two are clearly relatives if not siblings.
Flertom is a mirror image of the lady up there. She got Chil's eyes. She even has almost the same haircut (a bit longer). She's clearly the mother. We've solved Chilchuck's wife mystery.
But this wasn't what I was going to say.
This implies that Wife and Dandan both knew Chilchuck since their childhood. Because there's no way that Chil was just friend of the sister. They're both close to the same age, and I'll say Dandan is a Younger sibiling (she gives big sis vibes, and he gives young bro vibes). So either she introduced him to her brother or he introduced him to his sister and they became best friends as kids.
Could you imagine how their relationship was after Chil's Wife left him?
He knows he has to say something, but he doesn't want to end his relationships. At the end he takes his sister's side. He distances a bit from Chilchuck, calling him an "aquitance" rather than a friend. It isn't that he hates him, is just that it's complicated. And they both know it. They're in good terms tho, they just aren't best friends anymore and they don't talk about it. Their worry is the guild, not their personal stuff.
That's why Dandan introduces Chilchuck to Laios. If they were in bad terms, he would've suggested any other half-foot. They both priorize the guild and general safety of their own race. That's why Dandan suggests Chil instead of a less experienced hafling. He cares about the union and respects Chil's time and experience in dungeons. They're on good terms, at least good enough. Summing up, I get the feeling Dandan doesn't particularly likes Chil after what happened with his sister, but he respects him at least.
#hi fandom its me again overanalyzing side characters from 5 panels alone and some background context! <3#i will do this again.. eventually... not on dandan. this is all i could see in him ;(#also i think their relationship gets better as time passes#it's been 4 years since wife left him#and 5 years since half-foot union was formed#i'm a wife×chilchuck lover. i'll believe they talked about it and eventually (give them a year) got back together#and Dandan allows himself to be friends with Chil again so he doesnt feel he's bettaying his sis by doing so or sth.#human interactions are so complicated.. i love them.. fascinating... eeling like Kabru. ill put them in a jar and study them like bugs.#Dandan#Dandan dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#delicious in dungeon#i need an oficial name for Wife. i need.#i have the feeling Wife's older because they got married quite young. and Dandan seems the same age as Chil.#if anything hes younger. idk. tgeres no way shes marrying at 12 (chil married at 13 and dandan is same age)#this is my theory#idk how they are i insist. im working with crumbs here.#chilchuck#chilchuck tims#chilchuck dungeon meshi#i need to get some sleep lol#my shit#dungeon meshi spoilers
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The Husbands of River Song is not and has never been about the Eleventh Doctor being a deadbeat, distant husband (gross mischaracterization by the way) and the Twelfth Doctor being the "better, more mature, affectionate" husband.
It was about River Song. It was about River and how the events in Manhattan took such a toll on her. It was about letting us see River dealing with grief the way The Snowmen showed us how the Doctor coped after losing believing he had used up all his time with River.
Looking at THORS now with The Ruby's Curse in mind, I get the instinct (for lack of a word that I cannot remember) that the Manhattan incident Blue Roach read from River's diary was not the Manhattan episode that we saw in series 7.
On that note, I'd also like to bring up the fact that the Doctor grounds River and River grounds the Doctor. As Tree talked about in one of her tags, River's empathy is more cognitive than emotional and after musing on it for a bit – considering that the Doctor can no longer go to Manhattan (which may have changed in later series but I wouldn't know at the moment because I have yet to overcome series 7b) and that River does spend time with her parents in Manhattan post-TATM, would the latest Manhattan incident in River's diary be the funeral for Amy? Amy's death? Perhaps even Anthony's? I mean, we already know Rory died five years earlier than Amy. So, knowing how deep River's love for her mother is, it's not too farfetched to say that River spent that time with them. River was by their bedsides as they drew their last breath.
Then Rory's gone, Amy's gone, Anthony's gone. Where does that leave River? Where is the Doctor? (sulking on a cloud on top of Victorian London? trying to figure out the mystery of his newest companion? all while constantly mentioning a certain Professor Song who actually turns out to be his dearly sort of departed absolutely beloved wife?)
Without her parents (and her husband) to ground her, she goes on this maddened, grieving space Robin Hood spree. She seeks fun to fill in the void and takes up marriage as a hobby/side quest. Does she look for the Doctor? Perhaps. Yes, actually. Considering she crashed her latest sort-of-husband's ship onto a planet where she purported the TARDIS to be.
But... she's stealing the TARDIS. She could have just called the Doctor, yeah? So, she doesn't want the Doctor to know then. Well... yeah, considering she has two sort-of-husbands in hand.
So, River would just have gone on from one space Robin Hood spree to the next had the TARDIS not sort-of-stranded herself on Mendorax Dellora to make sure her Water stopped being stubborn and reconcile(?) with her Thief?
Also taking note of how River has read stories about them and knows that Darillium is purported to be their last night together (I could also bring up the fact that this is why I find it easy to digest the "River meeting regenerations of the Doctor younger than the Tenth Doctor makes sense and doesn't break cannon nor ruin SITL/FOTD" but that would take a whole other post). Does this River believe her time with the Eleventh Doctor has ended? The same way series 7b Eleven believed his time with older versions of River has ended? Is this all part of some grand fuckup in communication all thanks to their tangled timelines?
Maybe. Maybe not.
But has River not just been running from her family's death? Has River been running from her supposed last night with the Doctor?
"But River doesn't run." Oh yes. Yes, she does. She knows when to stand her ground. She knows when to charge. And she knows when to run.
"That's out of character for her." No, it's not. She's not invincible. She's this well trained assassin, yes. But invincible? No.
Invincible from the tendency to be blinded by their emotions? Obviously not.
River lies. And River runs.
She is not afraid of her death. She is afraid of the day when her husband, her Doctor, looks into her eyes and looks right through her. And it shouldn't kill her but it does. It did.
So she ran and ran until her bigger-on-the-inside Mum gently reached out and put her back together with the only person left who could ground her. Who she didn't recognize at first but still fell in love with (and would have loved even if he hadn't been revealed to be her actual, long missing husband). Who finally found out their last night wasn't just any night – it was a twenty-four year long last night. Who finally gave her a breather from all the running she'd been doing.
And oh what a night that was (it was the talk of the universe).
#tia talks tish#dw musings#i should be studying but look! i'm yapping away about fictional characters that nobody in my (offline) life knows about#and to whoever wants to yap accordingly or in the opposite manner please be kind to my remaining brain cell i'm just trying to make sense of#my own brain 👍🏻#laying all this out made me feel like that one meme with the guy about to burst his vein trying to explain the wall of stuff behind him#does all this make sense? most likely not. i refuse to reread it because it would just end up in the drafts if i do so and would not see the#light of day until - oh maybe six months from now#doctor who#river song#doctor x river#eleventh doctor#yowzah#twelfth doctor#the doctor#amy pond#rory williams#doctorriver musings#THORS has serious plot holes i'd like to banish forever but it still gave my gal River and her husband that much needed breather#so for that it's sort of forgiven (but never really forgotten)
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u kno, I don’t think that people consider enough the possibility (and very high probability) that Snape wasn’t mean to student’s because he wanted to, but more so because he had to. Not saying they he was nice. That man sure as hell wasn’t nice, especially when reading from Harry’s point of view.
But let’s consider for a moment the objective circumstances: Severus Snape was a past Death Eater, who at 21-ish years old changed sides (something only Dumbledore knew to which extent and the reasons), and knew of the possibility of the Dark Lord coming back because Dumbledore told him, and anyone who listened honestly, that he didn’t believe Voldemort to be truly gone.
Now, Severus Snape knows that Harry Potter, this child who is the Dark Lord’s undoing, is alive and is coming to the school, as probably most of his contemporary schoolmate’s kids are also going, have been there a while and will come for various years after. Snape is still bound to Dumbledore by his promise to be a spy, and is bound to Voldemort by brand. And Dumbledore is highly suspicious shit is about to go down (which u kno, he was rights ‘cause even from the first year lil Harry started Going Through It™️).
Having that background: Severus Snape, Head of Slytherin, and presumed Death Eater (‘cause u kno, spy), who was never known to be openly warm nor kind, who was fiercely bullied and he retaliated when felt necessary, is supposed to seem impartial and nice to all of his students?
Morally, should he had been? Heck yeah. Any decent teacher and adult should.
Realistically, should he had been? Well, if he wanted his cover blown, sure. If he wanted all of the Death Eaters who had children in school questioning the hell out of him, yeah. If he wanted Voldemort suspicious of his alliance and current belief system (which would have been at odds with the Death Eater ideals), uh-huh. But that would have made for a lousy spy at best and disastrous war changing consequences at worst.
And let’s be really honest here: Dumbledore gave him the position as teacher, primarily because he wanted to use Snape as a spy. That was Dumbledore’s priority, not the teaching. Which is a little wild to think coming from a school headmaster, truly.
This theory (which personally extends from theory to canon, because that’s how being a spy works) does not excuse him from how his prejudice blinded him from seeing Harry for Harry and not James (but the case could be made that neither did Sirius, but that’s another topic). That was wild. However, at the same time, he looked out for Harry’s life.
Again, I’m not saying Severus was warm and nice and he certainly acted mean and cruel at moments, particularly with kids from the other three houses. I just think that was part of the tragedy. He had a role to play, he played it perfectly, getting himself branded as a coward and a traitor by the people closest to him. And because of him, they won the war.
#severus snape#i will die on that hill#this is something that i constantly think about#i belive there is a lot of sacrifice in severus’ character#letting go of what he wants to do what he feels (and is told) that is needed#all for the greater good#i genuinely don’t believe he wished to be ‘othered’ for ALL of his life#we see him smiling and talking with his collagues at the table whenever they ate#he had to fight McGonagall for heaven’s sake!#that part had me BAWLING while reading AND watching the movie#he carried it out perfectly#but you can see the weight of it consuming him throughout the books and the movies#so no. its hard for me to believe that Severus enjoyed and wanted to be cruel on the main daily#welcome to my ted talk#i will defend him with my life#but like#i will defend this theory till the day i mf die i swear#ITS WHAT MAKES SENSE!#severus#snape#pro severus snape#basically?#character study
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no because see if we're talking c!tntduo, especially c!wil,
for me its always "almost" with these freaks. almost acting on it, almost closer than they should be, almost, almost, just enough to make c!wil feel alive and more. arm's length. unhealthy distance or lack thereof. get the blood pumping and yank himself away at the last moment. leave them both wanting like some fucked up starved kenneled animal, like stretching a rubber band, like hunger-thirst and the omnipresent want. you get me? the bassline, the base note of this story is wanting-needing-wanting. and
let's look at who's on the table today. just one half, sorry, c!Wilbur. i sanctify and canonize him now as the patron saint of almost-there. one must imagine Tantalus happy. hold onto that sentence for me while we go through this.
his hand slams the button and he almost leaves a mark; his poignant point was additionally steamrolled after this fact and no one even bothered to give him a proper burial, a proper memorial, because who mourns a fucking costume, a typecast homicidal maniac?
he almost won. he almost got it. he was almost happy. they were almost free. he almost proved a point to big Q. he was almost seen. he was almost understood. he almost made up for his wrongs kind of maybe not quite probably not, but he almost, he almost, he almost,
he almost forgave himself?
(kind of maybe not quite probably not.)
he was almost loved he was almost seen as human it almost wrapped up perfectly it almost had a cherry on top but, again, the thing about desire is it's stronger when it's not totally satisfied. c!q holds him with a desperation and he digs from q's gaze only an understanding of himself. this is not a two way radio.
the cherry on top is that this is his penance now, his stupid little ending no one likes. for what? for failure? for being the sly motherfucker he is? for being too stubborn and too arrogant to take up quackity's offer and, by extent, always always keeping him at arms length always leaving them both oh so fucking wanting?
he's now in the middle of bum fucking nowhere with no one who loves him with no one who knows him with none to show for how he clawed through the thirteen years of limbo except some scars and claustrophobia and a longing loneliness haunting him. there are no winners here, no trophies no grand ending. he ran off from his problems, as always.
congratulations, mr. president, you are now some unknown gas station clerk. another costume to wear, another character to play, forbidden from exiting stage left and being, what, himself? as if, honestly.
there is a want there, if you squint. does quackity want him to open up so he could close the distance, say what is always stuck in his throat, or taxidermy him like a trophy?
is this love, or fascination? is this affection, or obsession?
i think even under the gaze of someone that completely matches his freak and considers him not untouchably demonic but simply unpredictable i.e. c!quackity you could never find what he is. if you keep taking off his costumes there would just be more. if you keep taking off the mask his face would contort to more. if you're something so used to being forgotten you wouldn't even bother being yourself because who would even remember that? you keep peeling off his mask, facade after facade, and at some point you'd just be digging at dirt. you can't solve this puzzle, only pick it apart and ruin it
of course he can't be honest and open up, there's nothing in there. it's all a play, an actor, a lesson in dramaturgy. he'll open up when he's cold and dead on the operating table.
i am looking at c!quackity elbow-deep in the actor-metaphors on the operating table and i am asking: was it worth it? did you get what you seek, what you *wanted* from him? is this your idea of being closer than arms length? will you keep this as a trophy, too, that you have finally understood the misunderstood?
remember the bassline: want. need/want.
is the stage too big for c!wil or is he too ambitious. is the world too wide and his flames too dim? did he waste his shot, one piece of lead against leviathans? is he so lost in his own layers and layers of costumes he couldnt ever find himself again even if he begged to? i would ask "why, despite everything?/why, when everything was done?/why, when you tried your best?" but then he'd be asking the same question with a pinch more desperation and buddy neither of us has the answer here
there it is again, then, a stalemate of the omnipresent want.
the want to get-what-you-want (the hands grasping at the retreating water and reeling fruits / the hands grasping at burning flags and broken swords / the hands grasping at poker chips and glossy cards)
the want to understand (i push my thumbs into this caricature of actors and only façades split)
the want to be understood (c!quackity looked at him like he was human, through it all, and under q's gaze he was alive)
one must imagine Tantalus happy.
#c!tntduo#c!wilbur#-centered#c!quackity#character study#will do quackity soon. need to get a feel for what keeps him going.#character peeling apart like an onion while half asleep more like#very long post bear with me i have a lot of nothing to spout#hymns sermons#<- my character ramblings will go here#hymnhums
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I feel like these days we get so much criticism of the dynamics in 2012 that the characters get kind of flattened by the fandom, so I wanna say that 2012 Raph is not just a one-dimensional bully character, he's got a lot more caring and emotional intelligence than he gets credit for. Yeah, he has an obvious protective streak, but even beyond that, he's always his brother's number one supporter, even when he disagrees with them.
He's highly critical of Mikey's desire to make human friends, but when Mikey goes out to do it anyways and it blows up in his face with Bradford, Raph is the one to comfort him and tell him he deserves better.
He thinks Donnie's crush on April is delusional, but helps him out at every chance he gets, removing Donnie from embarrassing situations of talking him up in front of April. When Casey comes into the picture, Raph tells him point blank that it doesn't matter that they're best friends, and it doesn't matter how bad Donnie's chances are, Raph's on Donnie's side in this.
And when Leo starts sneaking out to see Karai, Raph is the one who notices, tells him off, and tries to get him to stop. He doesn't tell anyone else, though. He wants Leo to make good choices, but he respects him enough to let him make bad ones without getting the rest of the family involved. They'd all be on Raph's side, but he doesn't need them to all gang up on Leo like that, even if he's not listening.
Basically, Raph cares about his brothers, including their emotional well-being, even when it's not obvious. And yeah we should criticize the writing and how harsh it gets and how there's no resolution to the ways certain characters are treated, but I get tired of seeing complex characters be villainized and sometimes I just wanna read fanfiction that is nice?????? So that's my thesis I guess lol
#i just love him and want better for him#everybody writes him so mean and he is fr my little guy#i guess this didnt need to be written so confrontationally and could just be a character study#but based on fandom shit i really do forget sometimes that Raph is a good brother!#everyone acts like he is exclusively an asshole and its legit exhausting#he was my first favorite in that series and i want better for him#idk ignore me#tmnt#tmnt 2012#raph 2012#tmnt 2012 discourse
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throws up my hands in mock resignation but also a hint of frustration Okay Valentino is a cool villain I guess
He's like. Genuinely unsettling. Wish the show struck a better balance with his character sometimes (like sometimes when he's onscreen I have to skip over because I feel queasy and sometimes he's so unsubtle he feels more like a prop than a guy who's going to be a Huge Deal in s2)
#why yes I have been reading some phenomenal fanfiction lately#a lesser me would be agonising over my inability to ever come close to matching the#masterfully characterised works of these talented WORD WEAVERS#but envy is a spoilt housepest and we must spend less time unleashing it upon new targets#instead let's talk about how these fics discovered its possible??#to write Val as not only a 3dimensional character but a deeply horrifying person to WITNESS#to depict how he thinks and what he wants and what he contributes to the people around him#while acknowledging that his actions are supremely messed up#also without dumbing whatever the fuck is wrong with him down to just 'can't do math and needs a sippycup'#those jokes are funny but he's also a dealmaker#he doesn't need to be studied under a microscope! he needs to be gawked at in abject horror! Oh the Potential!#he needs to tell us more about how depraved hell can be by linking us to a portion of the culture full of the dead who cannot die!#anyways. rant over. uh I think I like valentino now? in the same way I like the old man villain from hunchback of notre dame.#just. (gestures) what is this dude. ew. oh my god#my post#personal stuff#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel valentino#is this anything#again I am entrenching on dangerous territory of 'expectations for this media I consume'#he really doesn't need to be written all shakespearean-like#too attached mayhaps#delete later#honestly worried that if the show does reveal his backstory or whatever it'll try to paint him in a sympathetic light#and then the online arguments will be a headache for a month#villain with tragic backstory ≠ sympathetic villain
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the library is an archivist's grocery store. imagine jon gets hungry but he cant go around eating people's experiences anymore so he starts devouring memoirs instead and becomes the world's leading expert on every autobiography ever written
#i need to draw him browsing the nonfiction aisles with a shopping cart brb#is this anything#jarchivist#tma#the magnus archives#tma shitpost#tma jon#hmm well maybe it only serves to feed him when the statements/memoirs are dread powers-related#oh well i am sticking to my headcanon#i want to add a martin cameo so bad like “hi honey do you need me to build another bookshelf”#but i havent come across enough studies (this would be a meme though lmao) of jon as an individual character. idk man#theyr so cute#maybe ill keep martin out for serious stuff#he gets his own deep dive yay#i love the fandom's ideas that jonny is google/trivia man#i bet he holds multiple books at a time like a deck of cards
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i'm having trouble making jack's hair as poofy as it is.
#soldier 76#overwatch#wip#i've been doing character studies of him#still need to get used to drawing him#also i colored gabe's skin brown#but then remembered he got pale after he 'died'
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I am having so many Roy Kent thoughts this morning. Like, just how deeply lonely has that man been, for a very long time probably but especially the past year? He doesn't seem to have...friends? Like, sure, he has his fellow coaches, and he has Jamie. But it's not exactly like Ted's been in the correct headspace for most of the season to be pal-ing around with Roy in his free time, and Beard is friends with everyone and I expect has a million and one social commitments at all times, dictated first and foremost by Jane. We get the sense in the Chelsea episode of the sort of easy rep Roy had with the staff and community there, but also that he's cut himself off largely from all those good parts of his former life; clean break since the day he left. So by now, Roy's social life is fully just work and his 10 yr old niece...and eventually, Jamie Tartt.
Before he started training with Jamie, though, I fully think Roy was isolated and depressed as all hell, probably much more than he realized or ever acknowledged. Yes, he had the Club, and sometimes Phoebe in the evenings, but the rest of the time? Come home alone to his empty house that wasn't anything like Keeley's, and try to read his book, and make his dinner. Maybe watch some footie on the telly. Yoga once a week, if he's even still going, but in a way even that's lost its charm, because it's not like he can tell the mums anything, they don't even know who he really is! Try not to think too hard about how much he misses Keeley. Rinse & repeat. And the cycle becomes so unbearable that god, does he welcome training Jamie.
But even training Jamie, at first, is just...a way to extend work, isn't it? Work, work, work so he doesn't have to think about anything else, or linger on his own encroaching loneliness with the world. We don't see him and Jamie do anything but train until Amsterdam, which is the start of the breakthrough, and then until the very end of the season. Because Roy very stringently doesn't let Jamie into other parts of his life, even though he maybe (definitely) wants to. Jamie is part of work, not part of his personal life, and he forces himself to keep those rigid boxes up even after they've begun to bleed through. It's Jamie who has to push through them, slowly force his way in past Roy's defenses. And it's a good thing Jamie is a persistent little fucker, or Roy would well and truly have had no one.
And the whole time this is happening, Roy is forced to live with the fact that he's brought this all upon himself. He left Chelsea. He left Keeley. He's cut himself off from nearly every good thing in his life, and the worst part of all is, he can't stop doing it, even knowing it's made him miserable! even knowing he can't go on like this! He still can't bring himself to consciously allow Jamie fully into his life even as he increasingly relies on Jamie and their time together to keep him afloat. They're together all of the time, but for a long while, Roy won't even call him his friend.
Just...god, Roy is the most insane blender of fierce love and arrogance and protectiveness and repression and rage and self-hatred and self-sabotage and isolation and, and!! all the things he won't allow himself to have and all the people he won't allow to love him!! We wasted so much time on Shandy and Zava this season when we should have been cracking Roy Kent's skull open like a nut and examining every inch of his brain, me thinks.
#i need to write a character study of him asap tbh. no one sees how dark and dangerous and mysterious and repressed he is but me!#(jokes)#remember in Waterfalls when i wrote him comparing the end to his football career to an entire family perishing in a tragic plane crash?#in full seriousness?#yeah. that's the sort of deranged thinking I feel is happening in that man's brain at any point in time#he is soooooooooo!!!!!#also I genuinely think jamie saved him this season mentally. i really truly do.#ted lasso spoilers#roy kent#ted lasso meta#ted lasso
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I think some folks MAY have gotten the wrong idea about how I feel about Circe with some of my posts. So, to clear the air...
Homies, I love that fucked up sorceress.
I love how we're never given a reason why she turns people into animals. That's so funny and so awful. And another potion-making magic gal?!?! I love that she's just basically vibing on an island doing whatever she wants. I even love the fact that she scares Odysseus shitless! She's morally gray and that's why she's FUN.
I just sincerely hate when people try to girlboss her or have her be a victim of SA when she never was Looking at you, Miller. Especially when she was actually the one who coerced Odysseus in exchange for his men being transformed back into humans. And even then, while he was clearly afraid of her, (it's in the language of the Odyssey) she likely meant him no harm after a certain point. He just didn't know that.
Why does she need a reason to do awful things? Why can't she just be a goddess who does whatever she wants? That's the reason why I love her!!! She's fucked up!!! :D
I hate what the Telegony did to her as well! >:( You're telling me, this sorceress goddess, who makes potions (!!!) wouldn't have magic contraceptives??? Would WANT CHILDREN?!?! WITH THE PATHETIC WIFEMAN?! No. Fuck no. Eugammon of Cyrene, I have beef with you 🤬
Anyways!!! Understand all the "#anti circe" I have is simply Anti "Girlboss Circe" or the book. I genuinely think she's neat af as her morally gray, fucked up sorceress self and just get frustrated with...everything :'D
#I have these same feelings with Medea and Medusa and so many others. Penelope too. Let them do something fucked up just to be fucked up#I'm a “god forbid women do anything” in the sense of 'she did a fucked up thing. That's why she's fascinating. Don't take her awfulness#away from her!!! please! I wanna study her under a microscope!'😭#PLEASE#...I actually kind of don't like the idea of her actually caring about her nymphs :P maybe she “protects them” but like...#I see her as a “Why are all of you dancing? Oh. it's a birthday? hm okay. Just make sure your duties are done.” while not caring#whose birthday it is. She's not really shown to be close to them during the Odyssey and idk just seems in character for her to not give af#save me morally gray circe#<-making that a tag now because...yeah. She absolutely wouldn't save me though.#Mad rambles#shot by odysseus#anti madeline miller#anti circe#<-THE BOOK! I HATE THE BOOK! LET HER BE AWFUL YOU COWARDS#Why do women need to be SA'ed to be strong Miller?! >:(#...Ima say it. The pathetic wifeman is more relatable to me than Hot Snake Monster Lady when it comes to this stuff.😤#I just sincerely hate the fact that people erase what happened to him you know? It's silly but it means a lot to me.#Also I think she got bored of him immediately and simply let him chill at her place.#She's a goddess. She's got better things to do and she absolutely doesn't love him and he absolutely doesn't want her.#I don't have with Eugammon btw. He's dead and I'm exaggerating but I STILL hate the Telegony >:(#tw sa#kind of??? idk#barely mentioned but yeah#Calypso though?? Yeah. I hate her in practically everything except Pirates of the Caribbean because that's not Odyssey Calypso
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they're so GROSSSSSS (<- desperately wants what they have)
alt color under the cut:
#martzipan#komahina#hajime hinata#nagito komaeda#2 final colors bc my brain is allergic to desaturation. i needed to have One Bright One for my sanity#anyways i think they have this thing when they finally get together#where komaeda will just say. Anything basically. in an attempt to fluster hinata#and it does fluster him! but also sometimes he decides to do something about it#which flusters KOMAEDA even harder bc the dumbass forgets that like. affection can happen to him#which makes HINATA flustered again because 'you can say all that but one kiss is overwhelming?!?'#and they do this. all the time. especially early on before they're really used to each other#and they're gross about it. they do this in public. everyone else has to watch them do this like. thrice daily#they're awful. and also i envy them#tried some new things this time. more character interaction practice which is fun#i think this is likee... the third???? kiss i've ever drawn??? good for them#but i care more about the lineart. i tried to think about line weight at least a little bit :] it is Difficult lmao#this one made me realize i need to do a hips study lmao. also a neck study#in other words a girl needs to practice her joints more#there's still smth bugging me abt hinata's face in the 3rd one. but. i don't care it's done i'm not touching it
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It cannot be understated just how unwell Striker has made me since December 2021, this goofy sadistic snake cowboy has completely altered my brain chemistry in a way that I have never been able to recover from
#like ik already post about him the most when it comes to HB#but guys you do not understand#outside of my tumblr i never stfu about this man#he’s in my brain constantly#and has been since December 2021#AND ALL WE HAD OF HIM AT THAT POINT WAS HARVEST MOON#LIKE INSANITY FR#November 2022 tho was the point of no return#like that was when i realized just how bad my brainrot got LMAO#once i had that realization there was no going back#and then in 2023 we got him in two episodes and a song#the stars aligned or something idk its so funny#no merch tho absolutely TRAGIC#its okay fan merch and concepts are EATING#the grip this silly snake cowboy has on my psyche needs to be studied#like i havent had brainrot about a character this badly in FOREVER#also if i had a nickel for each time i was able to use this meme format i’d have 3 nickels#helluva boss#helluva boss striker#striker helluva boss#ALSO HAPPY VALENTINES DAY#THIS IS MY VALENTINES DAY POST#JUST *HIM*
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devil marbly carbly ft me trying to figure out how to draw all of them in real time
(the dubstep weed jacking off shirt is from a meme i would source if i uh. remembered it sorry </3)
#there's a lot of little gags i'd recommend zooming in#also it's so weird how the first two dantes look Nothing like the rest of these pages. call it a warmup ig#also nero fuck you.mp4 i spent like 40 minutes trying to figure out how to draw dmc5 nero#my dmc4 nero didn't look That much like him but i was drowning with dmc5 nero trust me#anyway i had to draw some more dante on the last page bc even though he got a whole page most of it was like. bleh#for the sake of figuring out how to draw him not bleh. so i needed to draw him not bleh. :p#dmc#devil may cry#dante sparda#nero sparda#vergil sparda#eva sparda#nico dmc#lady dmc#trish dmc#v dmc#dmc5#dmc4#dmc3#pls excuse the shit lighting i am. figjting for my very life against directional lighting okay#this contains a lot of the little thoughts i had about dmcs 3-5 that i never posted about so. enjoy <3#skrunkart#a little nero x kyrie. as a treat#does kyrie have much going on as a character? no. do i think they're cute anyway? yes#i took the most liberties w trish and im pretty sure it's bc i was tired more than anything#these adhere pretty strongly to their game designs. in time i'll add details that make em mine#but this is a study (hence all the notes)#also this ended off a sketchbook ive spent like 1.5 yrs on (which is unprecedentedly long for me like it's Crazy it took that long)#so hoorayy
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