#natalie keepers

[terapsina]

Let's talk books. Sorted in threes by vibes.

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I Support Women's Wrongs (murder, slaughter and body horror galore).

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How to Become the Dark Lord and Die Trying ⭐⭐⭐⭐½ by Django Wexler - A woman from Earth is dropped into a magical realm, meant to save the Kingdom from the FoRCes of DaRKneSSss... except, unfortunately that might have been a thousand years worth of time loops ago, so it's rather time to lose one's temper and decide to become the Dark Lord herself.

Main character -> basically Deadpool (measured in sanity, humor and levels of bisexual horniness)).

Someone You Can Build a Nest In ⭐⭐⭐⭐ by John Wiswell - Shesheshen, a shapechanging monster who's rudely interrupted during her hibernation by hunters. Manages to to eat one of them, unfortunately she also gets shot by an arrow and falls off a cliff. On the bright side she meets a lovely human woman she might end up falling in love with so much... she'll want to build a nest in her (it's possible there's some Cultural Differences that need to be worked through).

Hench ⭐⭐⭐⭐ by Natalie Zina Walschots - Anna's latest temp job for a villain (because even supervillains need office help) ends with her carelessly injured by a superhero, laid off and with injured mobility for the foreseeable future (because human bodies don't see much difference between getting hit by a truck and getting moved out of way by someone able to pick up a truck). Angry, disillusioned, and looking for some vengeful payback she starts compiling the statistics of exactly how much suffering gets left behind the heroes and in quick order finds a new job working for one of the worst supervillains in the neighborhood.

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Extremely Competent Women Show Up to Fix Everyone's Shit (with a whallop of romance which was actually sweet instead of irritating)

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The Witchwood Knot ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ by Olivia Atwater - Winifred Hall was invited to the Witchwood Manor under the pretense of being the governess for a very bratty kid, but when said boy suddenly turns into a very quiet and perfectly bland boy overnight it's very obvious her charge has been stolen by faeries (and it might have something to do with the actual reason she's there). Rescue however is complicated by some factors, one, there being something terribly dark and wrong about the house (normal houses don't have screaming faces in the walls), another, the faerie man posing as the manor's butler who would very much like to make her run screaming the way so many servants had before her (unfortunately for him, she's not even half as scared of him as she is the eyes of the father of her charge).

This one's about dealing with past trauma, and otherworldly terrors paling in comparison to mundane monsters, set in a very beautiful and dark and shiver-inducing Victorian time world where the Fair Folk are very real.

(Same world as her Regency Faerie Tales trilogy that Started with Half a Soul but it's not necessary to read that one first to enjoy this one)

Keeper of Enchanted Rooms ⭐⭐⭐⭐½ by Charlie N. Holmberg - Merritt Fernsby inherits a house only to be immediately taken hostage by what turns out to be a very stubborn and opinionated magical house. Hulda Larkin of the Boston Institute for the Keeping of Enchanted Rooms goes there to facilitate the relationship between the house and its new owner.

It's supposed to be a very simple job. Unfortunately there's a third POV character in this book (no, not the Whimbrel House, though I adore that house and *insert here the Rosa Diaz gif about her new puppy and how she would kill everyone in this room and then herself if anything were to happen to that dog*). Anyway, they're a bit... uhhh... let's go with Bad News.

Emily Wilde's Encyclopedia of Faeries ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ by Heather Fawcett - As one might expect from the title, Emily (a Cambridge scholar) wants to write the first ever encyclopedia of faeries. And she's brilliant enough to do it, what she's terrible at is people (*insert autistic character alert here*).

Someone else might then say it's lucky that a fellow scholar with a far easier time at charming people has stuck his toes in her reaserch trip into the Hidden Ones... that person however doesn't understand how irritating, frustrating and maddening her academic rival Wendell Bambleby actually is.

What follows is a story filled with winter snows, some terrible fae, some adorable fae, some not-very-secret fae, the goodest of good dogs, and lots and lots of squabbling. It's the best.

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Dark and Impactful Stories about Children Who Decide on Their Own Paths

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A Skinful of Shadows ⭐⭐⭐⭐½ by Frances Hardinge - Kate, an orphan and the illegitimate daughter of some stuffy (and evil) aristocrats runs away because being a bastard doesn't mean she didn't inherit the family magic that allows her to get possessed by the dead.

A dead bear ghost is one thing, a Get Out situation is something else entirely.

A Sorceress Comes to Call ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ by T. Kingfisher - Cordelia isn't allowed friends or the privacy of closed doors, and whenever she's done something she shouldn't - a category too unpredictable to guard against - she's not allowed power over her own body.

Because her mother is an evil sorceress (think Regina and Cora... except somehow even worse). An evil sorceress that has found herself a Squire to lure into a marriage.

Hester is an old maid living with her brother, a Squire (well look at them coincidences), when said brother acquires a woman clearly set on his fortune. The plan is only to save her brother, except Hester can't help noticing how the woman's daughter keeps flinching in her mother's presence.

In The Lives of Puppets ⭐⭐⭐⭐ by TJ Klune - A family can be an android inventor, his human son (*homoromantic asexual alert*), a sadistic nurse droid, and a very emotional roomba.

And it can be a very happy family. Until one uncovers and wakes up an android that shares a very Skynet past with one's father, said father gets kidnapped, and one has to go on a journey to get him back.

(A book I like to call Sci-fi Reverse Pinocchio)

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Unraveling an Unjust System (and a hero that - on a scale from occasionally to constantly - hears a disembodied voice directly in their heads okay the connection between these three is a bit of a stretch but they're all great books so shut up)

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Hell for Hire ⭐⭐⭐⭐½ by Rachel Aaron - 5000 years ago Gilgamesh conquered the heavens, enslaved the demons and made it so that the only road to magic humanity had access, was through him.

Now, however a mercenary team made up of free demons gets hired by a Blackwood witch to protect him (and his familiar, the talking cat named Boston) while he puts down roots (literally) inside the new forest grove he's about to start so that he can stand up against the warlocks after him.

The witch quickly becomes the best client Bex and her crew have ever had (after all, warlocks under the rule of the Eternal King Gilgamesh are slavers of their kind, they are delighted at the chance to kill some).

Vespertine ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ by Margaret Rogerson - In a world where the veil between the living and the dead has been kinda broken Artemisia (*another autistic character alert*) is training to be a Gray Sister (magic nun).

Until her convent gets attacked by possessed soldiers and she has no choice but to pick up a Saint's Relic containing a malevolent revenant to protect it.

Problem. Only a Vespertine is supposed to do it. Another problem. The only one "alive" who can teach her to be a Vespertine is the revenant. Another another problem. The revenant cannot be trusted and if she loses control to it, the death toll will be counted in cities.

Terminal Alliance ⭐⭐⭐⭐¾ by Jim C. Hines - Post Zombie Apocalypse, where some aliens showed up, sort of cured the zombies and took the (mostly) cured zombies into their military.

Which leads us to Marion Adamopoulos, also known as Mops, the Leutenant in charge of Shipboard Hygene and Sanitation of the Earth Mercenary Corps Ship Pufferfish.

Right up until a bioweapon turns the entire crew except her crew back into zombies. Congratulations, she's the captain now.

(Space Janitors save the universe story).

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[stardustandrockets]

June Reading Wrap-Up

I ended up reading 10 books this month. Definitely more than I would have expected if you asked me on June 1st. It does help that I listened to four audiobooks over the course of as many days.

Every book I read this month (except The Way of the Househusband) was queer. I read queer year round, but I always pay special attention to make sure my #PrideMonth reads are especially queer.

What was your favorite book this month?

Books read:

• Mooncakes by Suzanne Walker and Wendy Xu

• The Way of the Househusband vol 8 by Kousuke Oono

• Legends & Lattes by Travis Baldree

• Stealing a Thief’s Heart by C.L. Cattano

• The Devouring Wolf by Natalie C. Parker

• The Princess and the Grilled Cheese by Deya Muniz

• The Witch King by H.E. Edgmon (reread)

• The Fae Keeper by H.E. Edgmon

• My Dear Henry by Kalynn Bayron

• Fake Dates and Mooncakes by Sher Lee

[starry-eon]

poem excerpt by me | a uquiz i'm unable to find | Jodi Picoult, My Sister's Keeper | Natalie Diaz, A Brother Named Gethsemane | tiktok | tumblr | Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Sáenz | The Bible

[archivyrep]

Arrogant curators, a pine-cone shaped vault, and a magical scroll in "Tangled" [Part 1]

Rapunzel shows the incomplete, and ripped, Demantis Scroll to Calliope in the episode "Keeper of the Spire"

Building off last month's post, I thought I'd focus on one character in the Tangled animated series in particular: Calliope. She is a keeper of the Spire, a closed-off museum of sorts, who is pretentious and arrogant. But, there is more than meets the eye, which I'll examine in this post, and talk about the role of curators, the difference from archivists, and other related topics, going beyond my past post on the subject.

Reprinted from my Wading Through the Cultural Stacks WordPress blog. Originally published on May 17, 2023.

On the surface, it seems that Calliope (Natalie Palamides), who debuts in the episode "Keeper of the Spire", is full of herself, annoying Rapunzel (Mandy Moore), Eugene (Zachary Levi), Lance (James Monroe Iglehart), and Cassandra (Eden Espinosa), who are hoping to get information on the Demantis Scroll. She also can do magic tricks, as a former street magician, and has a messy library in her house with various artifacts. It turns out, spoilers, that she is only the assistant of the actual keeper (Tony Amendola), who put her on a test to see if she was up to the task, and opens the Spire, a vault filled with artifacts. In the end, Raps gets the scroll she is looking for, and all seems well, as Calliope is now the keeper and presumably becomes more of a scholar. The real keeper is impressed by her perseverance even in adversity.

She is generally stereotypical, wearing oversized glasses, hair tied back in a bun, and wears beige robes. She later helps Raps and Eugene in stopping Cass from acquiring a specific object from within the Spire. In that episode, "Race to the Spire", Cass wants to acquire a spell that can allow her to control those in the brotherhood, even disguising herself as Calliope to trick Raps, Eugene, and Pascal. Her appearance is somewhat in line with librarians in other series, often portrayed as elderly people with glasses. Her hair being tied up could be a hint that she is a spinster, i.e. usually uptight old women who are "sexually undesirable", and rule-mongers, with conservative dress. It is something associated with fictional librarians.

However, in some other ways she goes against stereotypes of fictional librarians as she is not male, with a long beard, or with glasses, even though she is White, common of librarians in animation. These stereotypes are also manifested in elderly White women librarians. While saying all of this, she is not a librarian, and is more of a curator. Specifically, she is described as a keeper in the aforementioned two episodes she appears in. What I wrote about the keepers in my article about Recorded by Arizal is relevant here:

Keepers are curators, guardians, protectors, custodians, caretakers, or guards who visually lay hold onto something, like records, similar to roles that archivists have....the International Council on Archives and archival scholars like Alan Bell, Caroline Brown, Terry Eastwood, and Terry Cook have stated that the words recordkeeper and archivist are synonyms. After all, archivists are more than what Webster’s New World College Dictionary defines: people in charge of archives where public records and documents are kept.

Her name, Calliope, is likely a reference to the Greek mythological muse who presides over epic poetry and eloquence, with so-called harmony coming from her voice. Her character, however, is the opposite of this, or at least it seem that way at first. As noted on her Wikipedia page, in the aforementioned mythology she had two famous songs (Orpheus and Linus), said to be the wisest of the Muses, but also the most assertive, defeated daughters in a singing match. Otherwise, the page notes that she is often shown with a writing tablet, carrying a book or roll of paper, even wearing a gold crown. In his 2020 "Mother of Muses" song, Bob Dylan declares he is "falling in love with Calliope", and says she "doesn't belong to anybody".

Since Calliope becomes the Keeper, she is undoubtedly a curator, what the Dictionary of Archives Terminology calls "the administrative head of a museum or collection". She is not, however, an individual responsible for the "oversight of a collection or an exhibition", the other definition in the dictionary. As the one-and-only Keeper, i.e. effectively a solo archivist or lone arranger, although she has no formal training, she is also responsible for "appraising, acquiring, arranging, describing, preserving, and providing access to a collection of original documents", a manuscript curator, on one level or another.

© 2022 Burkely Hermann. All rights reserved.

Continued in part 2

[ofspvrta]

[ MEND ]  for sender to treat receiver’s wound which leads to them having to remove an article of clothing resulting in revealing scars hidden beneath - from Natalie!

μ::|| meme:   EXTENSIVE SCAR RELATED PROMPTS  | accepting [ Ξ ]

θ::||@healingwords | natalie

The Greek had protested the help the entire time. "Natalie, I'm fine. It looks worse than it is!" But the healer had insisted. What did it matter? Kassandra would only heal it soon anyway and she didn't need Natalie seeing the Isu markings that always followed an injury. But Natalie was stubborn in these things, lifting Kassandra's shirt up enough to get to the wound at the abdomen and revealing not only the fresh wound, but the scar that ran across her lower torso. Kassandra knew instantly that her attention was split between the fresh wound and the two-millennia-old scar. "Natalie, I am asking you, please, leave it be. I'm fine."

[thenegoteator]

refusal to mourn, andrea cohen | persephone the wanderer, louise glück | my sister's keeper, jodi picoult | what the silence said, marie howe | in changsha, passing by jia yi's residence, liú chángqīng, trans. east asia student | republic, plato, trans. emily wilson | adult grief, louise glück | a brother named gethsemane, natalie diaz | the s-classes that i raised webcomic, biwan, geunseo

thank you @loosingmoreletters for getting this concept stuck in my head!! please take responsibility for your crimes

[damnelves]

MY BROTHER / MY KILLER

"The King James Bible, Genesis 4 / "Black Leopard, Red Wolf" by Marlon James / "Car Crash" by Jenna Andersen / "Stratis Thalassinos Among the Agapanthi" by George Seferis (tr. by Edmund Keeley) / "You are Jeff" by Richard Siken (1) / "Brother" by The Rural Alberta Advantage / "A Brother named Gethsemane" by Natalie Diaz / "Succession" Script (1) / "You are Jeff" by Richard Siken (2) / "Cain Killing Abel" by Pietro Novelli / "The Death of Abel" by Gustave Doré (1866), recolored / "Lupa" by Matthew Nienow / Succession, S04 EP 10, "With Open Eyes" / "My Sister's Keeper" by Jodi Picoult / “Mirror Traps” by Hera Lindsay Bird / post by tumblr user vampowers / "Antigone", tr. by Anne Carson / "6 ways to draw a circle" by tumblr user filmnoirsbian / "Succession" Script (2) / "Courage, Anxiety and Despair Watching The Battle" by James Sant (detail) / "The Plagues", Prince of Egypt, dir. by Brenda Chapman / untitled poem by tumblr user nathanielorion (1) / "After Abel" by Dante Émile / comment from tiktok / "Famous Blue Raincoat" by Leonard Cohen / "For my unnamed brother" by Toi Derricotte / Succession screenshot / untitled, Sue Zhao / untitled poem by tumblr user nathanielorion (2)

[battyaboutbooksreviews]

🌈 Queer Books Coming Out in August 2024 🌈

🌈 Good afternoon, my bookish bats! Here are a FEW of the stunning, diverse queer books you can add to your TBR before the year is over. Happy reading!

[ Text list below ⤵ ]

❓What was the last queer book you read?

[ Release dates may have changed. ]

❤️ Failure to Comply - Sarah Cavar 🧡 I Spit On Your Celluloid - Heidi Honeycutt 💛 You're Embarrassing Yourself - Desiree Akhavan 💚 Death of the Hero - Briona Johnson 💙 Between Dragons and Their Wrath - Devin Madson 💜 The Crimson Crown - Heather Walter ❤️ Sacrificial Animals - Kailee Pedersen 🧡 Oath of Fire - K. Arsenault Rivera 💛 The Palace of Eros - Caro De Robertis 💙 This Ravenous Fate - Hayley Dennings 💜 Mistress of Lies - K.M. Enright 🌈 Wolf Bite - T.J. Nichols

❤️ In the Valley, A Shadow - Samantha Tano 🧡 Follow My Lead - Adrian J. Smith 💛 The Last Woman I Kissed - Venetia Di Pierro 💚 Full Shift - Jennifer Dugan & Kristen Seaton 💙 Hers for the Weekend - Helena Greer 💜 Come Out, Come Out - Natalie C. Parker ❤️ Rules for Ghosting - Shelly Jay Shore 🧡 How to Leave the House - Nathan Newman 💛 Plot Twist - Carmen Sereno 💙 On the Far Side of a Crescendo - Kalyn Hazel 💜 Tiny Oblivions and Mutual Self Destructions - Maxwell I. Gold 🌈 Daylan and the River of Secrets - Edd Tello

❤️ The Italy Letters - Vi Khi Nao 🧡 The Gender Binary Is a Big Lie - Lee Wind 💚 The House Where Death Lives - Alex Brown 💙 Ash's Cabin - Jen Wang 💜 The Avian Hourglass - Lindsey Drager ❤️ The Heart Wants - Krystina Rivers 🧡 A Grand Love - Janna Barkin 💛 You Can't Go Home Again - Jeanette Bears 💜 Libertad - Bessie Flores Zaldivar 🌈 Her Golden Coast - Anat Deracine

❤️ Mighty Millie Novak - Elizabeth Holden 💛 Rise and Divine - Lana Harper 💚 Dying for You - L Flowers 💙 I'll Have What He's Having - Adib Khorram 💜 Changing Her Tune - Amanda Kabak ❤️ Monogamy? In this Economy? - Laura Boyle 🧡 The Rainbow Age of Television - Sayna Maci Warner 💛 Medusa of the Roses - Navid Sinaki 💙 Confounding Oaths - Alexis Hall 💜 Idol Lives - K.T. Salvo 🌈 Brother's Keeper - Quinn Cameron

❤️ Key Lime Sky - Al Hess 🧡 Crushing It - Erin Becker 💛 The Husky and His White Cat Shizun - Rou Bao Bu Chi Rou 💚 Not for the Faint of Heart - Lex Croucher 💙 Tasting Temptation - JJ Arias 💜 Ami - S. Jae-Jones ❤️ You're the Problem, It's You - Emma R. Alban 🧡 Cubs & Campfires - Dylan Drakes 💛 The Dark We Know - Wen-yi Lee 💙 Practical Rules for Cursed Witches - Kayla Cottingham 💜 Riyati Rebirth - Kalani Shimizu 🌈 The Brujos of Borderland High - Gume Laurel III

❤️ A Bánh Mì for Two - Trinity Nguyen 🧡 Dance of the Starlit Sea - Kiana Krystle 💛 Scattered Snows, to the North - Carl Phillips 💚 Beyond a World Apart - Caitlin Myers 💙 Don't Let It Break Your Heart - Maggie Horne 💜 Nothing Heals Me Like You Do - Harper Bliss ❤️ How It All Ends - Emma Hunsinger 🧡 How Do I Sexy? - Mx. Nillin Lore 💛 The Palace of Eros - Caro De Robertis 💙 Prince of the Palisades - Julian Winters 💜 Better Left Buried - Mary E. Roach 🌈 Back to Back - Jo Fletcher

❤️ DITCHLAPSE / [REALLY AFRAID] - Tommy Wyatt 🧡 The Love Archives: Bonus Scenes & Excerpts for Palestine - Various 💛 Guardian: Zhen Hun - Ying Priest 💚 The Sunforge - Sascha Stronach 💙 Queering Reproductive Justice - Candace Bond-Theriault 💜 Gender Explained - Diane Ehrensaft & Michelle Jurkiewicz ❤️ The Unlikely Pair - Jax Calder 🧡 In Universes - Emet North 💛 We Love the Nightlife - Rachel Koller Croft 💙 Lessons from Cruising - Martin Goodman 💜 Wild Ginger in the Rhubarb - Eule Grey 🌈 Not My Circus - Delicia Niami

❤️ Asunder - Kerstin Hall 🧡 The Phoenix Keeper - S.A. MacLean 💛 Encounters with James Baldwin - Various 💚 Verity's Game - Jennifer Giacalone 💙 Hunt Me! I Crave the Chase - Fae Quin 💜 The Audacity Omnibus - Carmen Loup ❤️ Haunted to Death - Frank Anthony Polito 🧡 Blood Orange - Paige Grunewald 💛 The Bad Things We Did - Chris Archeske 💙 Dark Restraint - Katee Robert 💜 Worth the Wait - Kenna White 🌈 The Maid and the Crocodile - Jordan Ifueko

❤️ Loving Corrections - Adrienne Maree Brown 🧡 The Last Witch in Edinburgh - Marielle Thompson 💛 The Duchess of Kokora - Nikhil Prabala 💚 The Scales of Seduction - Rien Gray 💙 Survival Is a Promise - Alexis Pauline Gumbs 💜 Loka - S.B. Divya ❤️ The Every Body Book of Consent - Rachel E Simon 🧡 Southern Lights - Liz Arncliffe 💛 Then Things Went Dark - Bea Fitzgerald 💙 Death at Morning House - Maureen Johnson 💜 The Last Doorbell - William Parker 🌈 The Pairing - Casey McQuiston

[rogloptimist]

I KNOW NOT; AM I MY BROTHER’S KEEPER? - SIMON AND ADAM YATES

what do you mean i have a problem i only make one of these every other day ,, (credits under cut)

inscriptions cain read in abel's eyes - silvina ocampo // adam yates and simon yates - stage 1, tour de france 2023 (michael steele/getty images) // adam yates and simon yates - stage 1, tour de france 2023 // adam and simon yates become the first twins to top a tour de france stage - the week staff // adam yates and simon yates - vuelta a espana 2018 // adam yates and simon yates - stage 5, tour de l'avenir 2013 // adam yates and simon yates - il lombardia 2014 (watson) // first encounter of the twin kind - chris sidwells // adam yates and simon yates - chris sidwells // simon yates - vuelta a espana 2018 (tim de waele/getty images) // brother of mine - j. suh // adam yates - stage 14, vuelta a espana 2018 (alamy) // his brother's keeper: adam yates held back to guide simon to vuelta victory - patrick fletcher // adam yates and simon yates - vuelta a espana 2018 // simon yates bursts out of twin adam's tour de france shadow with stage win - mike walters // adam yates and simon yates - stage 1, tour de france 2023 (letour.com) // 'the wink that said let's go' - yates brothers race in sync at tour de france - sophie smith // after forever ends - melodie ramone // adam yates and simon yates - stage 1, tour de france 2023 (papon bernard/reuters) // the long way to a small, angry planet - becky chambers // simon yates instagram // the solitude of prime numbers - paolo giordano // simon yates and adam yates (mitchelton-scott) // simon yates and adam yates - stage 2, tour de france 2023 // killing flies - michael dickman // a brother named gethsemane- natalie diaz // adam yates and simon yates (sprint cycling agency x bici.pro) 

[finkuldunkulboydetective]

On Siblings

After Abel - Dante Émile//2. alain robbe-grill it @negaversace//3. A Brother Named Gethsemane - Natalie Diaz//4. Rudo y Cursi (Carlos Cuarón, 2009)//5. Antigone - Sophocles//6. Cain Killing Abel - Pietro Novelli//7. ritika jyala/8. Homecoming (Mark Jean, 1996)//9. My Sister's Keeper - Judi Picoult//10. The Silent Twins (Agnieszka Smoczynska, 2022)//11. Fleabag S2E3//12. When the Curious Girl Realizes She is Under Glass - Bright Eyes//13. Ragnarok S2E6//14. Weight - Jacqueline Woodson//15 Unknown//16. Promise (Glenn Jordan, 1986)//17. Another Travellin' Song - Bright Eyes//18. cupidswurld//19. Blaineunderstudy//20. A Statue of Vincent and Theo Van Gogh By Ossip Zadkine

[intimidating-fettuccine]

ohhhh so basically toby belongs to this category of residents who live under a facade to avoid revealing their problems/insecurities?

like puppeteer, jason, jeff?

Yep. Toby/Pup/Jason/Jeff/BEN/EJ/Natalie/Helen are the secret keepers in terms of their trauma.

But I think Toby/BEN/EJ/Helen are the most private about it.

[gingergofastboatsmojito]

The keepers of the weather

They are disconnected, or as Richie said: "Sounds like total chaos."

Let's focus on what Richie says for a minute:

Dining room sounds like shit. It’s like, the soul, you know?

It’s like… Service sounds like total chaos.

Every day is the Super Bowl. I could use a lightning bolt.

Let's focus on what Natalie says for a minute:

You good?

Like, the acoustics?

Every day can’t be perfect.

Can’t control the weather.

I’m-I’m good. I’ve just accepted the fact that I’ll never be comfortable again.

I included the whole scene in the vid because I looooved their rapport but the only point I'm trying to make here pertains to Sydcarmy, not the rest, although there's a bonus track ;)

Since I watched S3 I have the feeling that all characters lend their voices to Sydcarmy → as I mentioned here, because this season they are like off, disconnected, they are communicating, but not efficiently.

I went over that in previous posts and here they are, if you wanna read them for context:

Purpose, chef!

Let's put the SHIP in partnership

Her avoidance

The trap

How you argue is how live

It actually means conscious VS unconscious

So, back to my point: I 100% BELIEVE RICHIE IS UNCONSCIOUNLY DESCRIBING NOT THE CURRENT VIBE OF THE RESTAURANT BUT OF SYD AND CARMY, WHICH AFFECTS EVERYTHING AROUND THEM BECAUSE THEY ARE THE KEEPERS OF THE WEATHER.

Nat is trying to tell us what I have been telling myself, S3, in terms of Sydcarmy is REALISTIC, because there's no way that if you have a main character like Carmy, with all his mental struggles, all his unsolved issues, conditions, and current mental status due to his relapse, regression, withdrawal, etc, this doesn't happen, exactly as they are portraying it and even worse → check this out.

And once that happens, as it did, it's impossible that it doesn't affect EVERYONE AROUND THEM, including and mostly Sydney, because they are the alpha team. They are intrinsically intertwined and are the keepers of the whole weather. So if they are off:

"The soul, you know? It's total chaos".

And like Nat said: "It can't be perfect all the time."

Bonus track: Risky business. Mickey and Richie "dropped some shit off for Jimmy". There's no way that business was squeaky clean. Which in the future MIGHT BE VERY USEFUL FOR THE BEAR. Let's keep an eye on Jimmy, especially now that his having some financial issues that are putting him on the verge of being poor. That's a storyline I'm particularly interested in because if it plays out like I wish it did, Carmy can kiss his debt with Cicero goodbye ;) *fingers crossed*

Remember to follow my tag #Gingerpovs 💋

[shadows-from-helvete]

Introduction about Adam

(before anybody comes at me they are aged up a few years. And I think Natasha should break up with Markus until then and come together with Vanessa. So yea just a headcanon of mine so you don't wonder. Also going to answer any questions I may have about him)

•=Name=•

-Adam Dahl -Also known as Adam the Panther under his old team

•=Age=•

-16 years old

•=Gender & Sexuality=•

-Homosexuell & Non-binary

•=Height=•

-1,71cm

•=Family=•

-Sebastian Dahl (Father) -Natalie Dahl( Mother,left when Adam was 12)

•=Nationality=•

-German🇩🇪(Father side)/Norwegian🇧🇻(Mother side)

•=Home=•

-Is living in Grünwald with his Father after moving back here. In the middle of everything in a small apartment

•=Pets=•

-A 4 year old black male German Shepard named Boomer and a 3 year old female White swiss Shepard named Marshmallow. -An aquarium with shrimp

>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<

•=School & Class=•

-Highschool(Gesamtschule) and Grade 10

•=Relationships=•

-Good friends:Jojo,Vanessa,Deniz,Marlon,Raban

-Friends:Leon(would still kick his ass all the time because he annoys Adam)

-Seem nice: Willi,JoJo's mom, Leon&Marlons dad,Edgar,Deniz Father(dilf energy)

-Finds them weird:Hatschi(doesn't trust him and doesn't know him that well)

-Ew:Markus dad

-Hell na!:Siegers,Natasha

-has crush on:Markus

•=Hobby's=•

-Used to play soccer and be a keeper but after an accident he needed to stop play soccer. The accident was also the reason they moved. -Really enjoys drawing,making music and exploring the forest

>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<>=<

•=Appearance=•

-Skintone:very light(bro doesn't get brown no matter how long in the sun)

-Eyes:Dark moss green

-Nose:more on the average side

-Face shape: sharp

-Hair: longish hair that is black on the roots because the hair colour grew out. Black fades to dark and a bit lighter blue. Bangs are tight back or gelled back. One hair strain in his face.

-special markings: has a birthmark under his right eye

•=Clothing style=•

Style: sometimes more emo sometimes more punk or metal or something between depending on the mood.

-Mostly to lazy to dress up so he mostly keeps it basic.

-Loves his leather jacket,leather boots and battle jacket with lots of patches from his favourite bands like Tokio hotel,Mayhem,Metallica,Nirvana,Skillet Slayer ect.

-Wears eye shadow when he's outside all the time.

-Adam also loves to do corpse paint but doesn't do it that often and if just at home for pictures

•=Backstory=•

-Adam was living with his dad and mom until he was 12. His mother left his father for another man and never came back. It was a pretty hard time for him but he wasn't really sad, just really angry. He changed school one time became they moved into another part of the city when he was 13. He was more an outcast because of his blue hair and the way he was so of course be got bullied which didn't botherd him to much even tho he has mental problems since he was younger and they just got more and worse over time.

-Loved soccer and drawing since he was younger and to that day still draws. When they moved he got into a soccer team and they got along pretty well. At the age of 14 he had his last game. Adam was a keeper and was pretty good at it. He was holding almost everything. His team won the game. It wasn't anything special just a simple game against another team. But one of the members of the other team weren't so happy about it. Turned out this kid was known for aggression problems and so he turned to Adam and yelled at him at first. It was probably a coincidence that he picked Adam . He got closer to him and without thinking he kicked Adam in the kneecap out of anger which made him fall to the ground. Long story short he kicked Adam in such a weird and bad place that his kneecaps were damaged so he couldn't walk properly for a few months and even tho he can walk normally now he can't play soccer or much other sport anymore. This is why they moved to Grünwald and Adam acts like he doesn't know anything about soccer or played it. He thinks its better than explaining why he doesn't play anymore ect.

(Picture of 14 year old Adam before his last game with his team next to him)

-At first the bunch thought the new kid was one of the Siegers because of his style but after JoJo saw Adam with a pigeon he found and talked to him he found out he was pretty cool. So from that on JoJo forced Adam to come to there training a few times or hang out with them because as JoJo means he needs to go out more and be more social.

-2 years after the kneecap incident he tries to go back to soccer even tho it's hard but he tries. Also sometimes asks Willi for advice

(black eye and Bandage because he got into a fight with the Siegers and they kicked his ass)

-he gets along with the bunch pretty well as well as Willi but sometimes he really wants to kick Leon's ass because this little shit can be annoying.

-had a crush on Marlon and Markus and struggles because he doesn't know if he should have something for both.is stupid and doesn't notice the signs

-Extra-

[slackville-records]

Natalie Merchant - Giving Up Everything

"Giving Up Everything"

Giving up everything,

my hungry ghost of hopefulness.

Giving up everything,

not haunted by wanting this.

Giving up everything,

the fortune I was saving.

Giving up everything,

I mercy-killed my craving.

Giving up everything,

I’ve opened up my eyes for this.

Giving up everything,

see the whole magnificent emptiness.

Gave what I want for how it is,

for the stone inside and the bitterness,

for the sweetness at the core of it.

Giving up everything,

the master plan, the scheming.

Giving up everything,

my cursed search for meaning.

Giving up everything,

the compass and the map I was reading.

The hinterlands I’m leaving,

I’m finally leaving behind.

Giving up everything,

the big to-do, the hullabaloo,

the tug-of-war for some twisted truth.

For the everlasting ache of it,

no longer slave, not chained to it,

no gate, no guard, no keeper,

no guru, master, teacher.

See the slow-receding faces

dissolve to black, no traces.

[star-girl69]

Ultraviolence

Natalie Scatorccio x Fem!Reader

—-

a/n: thanks to google translate and my very limited knowledge of high school french for their help this chapter 😍 i hope you all enjoy!!

warnings: blood, injury, swearing, kissing, tell me if i missed anything!!

Chapter Twelve - Amoureuse

Chapter Twelve - Amoureuse

—-

1996-

The séance was held in the attic. If you closed your eyes and breathed in deep, you could still smell the slight rot of a dead body.

“O’ keeper of this wild and hidden place…” Jackie dipped her finger into a bowl of something red, swirling it around. “We anoint ourselves with blood and earth.”

She draws an X on Shauna’s forehead, who has a piece of cloth wrapped around her face, and is holding the hunting knife by a string tied to it.

Jackie turns back around with a chipper smile, an X already drawn on her forehead.

“Here,” she says, handing it to Travis. He looks at the metal bowl, shooting her a look. “It’s just dirt and deer blood. Class witch recipe. Relax.”

He takes the bowl and marks a X to his forehead, before handing it to Natalie, who doesn’t even notice he’s handing it to her because she’s too busy staring at you.

You could feel her eyes on your back the entire walk back, and you can feel them on you now.

Jackie breathes out, sitting down, wiping her bloody finger onto the cabin floor. She raises her hands up, and Misty, who you’ve ended up next to, does as well.

The rest of the girls shuffle around with passing the bowl of blood, still besides.

“O spirit, we offer our sister as your instrument. Come to us and speak your peace.”

“It is I, Jacques,” Shauna says. A few of the girls laugh at her light monotone voice. She clears her throat. “Jacques,” she says, her voice deeper, earning more laughs. “Ask your questions. The pendulum will answer them.”

“Okay,” Van says, passing off the bowl of blood and clearing her throat, raising her hands out, palms to the sky. “Dear dead hunter guy… did O.J. do it?”

You and the other girls laugh, and you smile, grabbing the bowl of blood from Misty. You dip your finger in, looking at the bright red rippling.

“Come on, you guys, serious questions.”

“The veil is thin between our two worlds,” Shauna- or Jacques- confirms.

You tap your finger against the side of the bowl, watching the excess blood fly off, before lifting it back up to your forehead. Your eye’s meet Natalie’s.

You inhale and draw the X, handing the bowl off to the girl next to you.

“Ask what is in your heart,” Shauna says.

“Okay,” Mark says, holding her hands out and closing her eyes. “Is Principal Berzonsky screwing Ms. DeWine?”

The girls laugh before turning to Shauna and the pendulum. It spins in a circle, and a few of the girls gasp.

“It is certain,” Shauna smiles.

“Hunter guy, if we hadn’t crashed, would we have won Nationals?” Akilah asks.

The knife swings back in forth, and the girls start booing and laughing.

A few more questions go by, all making you laugh and forget about everything that happened earlier that day.

“They’re obviously fake,” Nat says. The conversation had steered towards Christie Caper’s boobs. “You really need a ghost to tell you that?”

“You think?” Mari asks, as Javi comes upstairs and sits between Nat and Travis. “But who would have paid for them? Her parents?”

“I think they got divorced recently. It could have been guilt money.”

“Well that’s just creepy,” Mari replies to Van.

A small smile crosses Van’s face. “‘Well, honey, your mom and I are splitting up but don’t worry, ‘cause your tits are gonna look amazing!’”

“Okay, guys, guys, focus,” Jackie says through the laughter. “Next question.”

Misty raises her hand, and Jackie motions for her to go. She looks around the circle excitedly, before closing her eyes.

“Dear spirit, I need to know the truth. Does the person I like like me back?” A few of the girls coo, and you can’t help but smile at her, trying not to look at Natalie.

The pendulum spins in a circle, and a few of the girls whoop and whistle, applauding Misty.

“Okay, next question?”

Javi raises his hand and Jackie nods.

“Are we all gonna die out here?”

The circle becomes silent.

The knife starts spinning.

“Okay, an eight?” Van asks, shuffling slightly. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It’s not an eight, it’s an infinity,” Mari says.

“Yeah, okay, Aristotle.”

Lottie screeches at the top of her lungs. Everyone jumps back and the window swings open, the candles all going out, the attic turning dark. More screaming fills the cabin, and you realize one of the screams is yours.

“Who has the matches?” Jackie shouts.

Someone closes the window. Your back is nearly pressed against the wall, huddled into the corner.

A few of the girls crowd around Lottie while she pants and sobs.

“Guys, somethings really wrong with her,” Van says, holding onto Lottie’s shoulder, who lets out another scream.

“What’s happening?” someone shrieks.

“It wants… it wants…” Lottie cries.

“Misty, what do we do?” Van shouts.

“It wants!”

“Lottie, I swear to God, if you’re fucking with us-”

“I thinks she’s, like, possessed!” Akilah shouts back.

“Lottie. Lottie, Lottie, sweetie,” Shauna says. “What’s going on? What is ‘it’?”

“More like what does ‘it’ want?”

“Hungry,” she cries. “Hungry.”

She starts laughing cackling, a shiver rips across your spine, and you almost scream when someone places their hand on your shoulder.

“Y/N?” Natalie. “Are- are you okay-?”

“Shh,” Lottie says, grabbing onto Shauna. “It’s in you already.” Shauna bats her away and stands up.

“Lottie. This isn’t a game,” Tai says like she’s scolding her. But the more you look at her, the more you watch her, the more you think she’s not faking.

Lottie sits up straight.

She starts speaking in something that’s not English.

You grab Natalie’s hand, the one that’s still on your shoulder, and she squeezes, still looking with wide eyes at Lottie.

“Is that French?” someone asks, and you listen closer. “Since when does Lottie speak French?”

“Jackie, w-wasn’t she in your class?”

“Yeah, but she sucks at French!”

Lottie is speaking French. You let go of Natalie’s hand and take a step forward, trying to listen, even when Nat tugs on you and says your name.

“Well, what’s she saying?”

“I don’t know! I suck at French, too!”

“Damn it, Jackie, try not to!”

“Ça veut du sang,” Lottie keeps repeating, over and over.

“It wants blood,” you mutter to yourself, as Jackie tries in vain to translate Lottie’s hurried sentences, one after another, blending together.

“Uh, uh, it wants!” Jackie yells after a moment. “What? What does it want?”

“God, Jackie!” you shout, walking over to Lottie and crouching in front of her. “It wants blood! It wants blood! Have you never paid any attention to Madame?!”

“Blood?!” Jackie yells.

“Not the word I want to be hearing right now,” someone shouts.

“Lottie, what? What else? Uh- pourqoui, Lottie? Pourquoi veut-il du sang? Why does it want blood?!”

She stands up and turns around, facing that one lonely attic window, staring out into it.

“Ici,” she pants. “Ici, ici,”

“Here!” you shout, trying to work up the courage to go up to Lottie again. “She’s saying ‘here’!”

“There’s blood where, Lottie?” Van shouts, before tugging on your arm. “Translate that!”

“Fuck, uh, où y a-t-il du sang?”

“Why are you encouraging her, Van?” Tai shouts.

Lottie doesn’t answer.

“Blood here? Or out there?” Van shouts.

“Ici? Là-bas?” you shout. “Where, Lottie? Where?!”

“You must spill blood,” she whispers finally, and it’s not in French anymore. “Or else…”

“Or else what, Lottie?!”

Then, she throws her head back, rearing up, and plunges her head right through the glass of the window.

You scream. It’s all you can think to do this moment, but you’re not even thinking- it’s all you can do.

When Lottie turns back around, blood falls down her forehead, dripping past her nose. She raises her hand to the space in between her eyebrows, and looks at her fingers, which come away slick with blood.

She starts wailing.

The girls help her to the floor, and she just keeps wailing and wailing, screaming like banshee, and all you can do is stand there and try not to scream as well.

“The power of Christ compels you!” Laura Lee shouts, running past you with a Bible in her hands. “Begone, Satan! Lottie! Lottie, stop!”

Then, just when it seems like Lottie will just scream and wail forever, Laura Lee throws the Bible at her.

The wailing stops.

“Ow!” she shouts. “What the hell, Laura Lee?”

“Seriously?” Mari asks. “What the motherfuck just happened?”

All you can do is stand there, looking at the blood falling down Lottie’s face, the memory of her screams ringing around in your head.

—-

“Do we think it’s still up there?”

The subject of the seance and the attic had become taboo in the last hour. After cleaning Lottie’s wound and letting her go off to bed- everyone had tried to get to bed themselves. But all of you were thinking it. Akilah had just said it first.

“You all need to stop,” Taissa hissed, sitting up. “There’s nothing up there. Lottie’s been acting weird for weeks.”

A small snore came from the cot Lottie was sleeping on.

You can’t help but sit up as well. “I don’t mean to, like, freak anyone out but- I once overheard Lottie say she was close to failing French. I don’t- l don’t think she knows how to say what she said.”

Taissa cuts you a death glare. But the rest of the girls remain silent.

“Fine,” she spits, grabbing her blanket and pillow and standing up. “I’ll prove it.”

“You’re gonna sleep up there?” someone asks.

“That’s right. Who’s with me?”

You lay back down on your bed, listening to Laura Lee’s prayers.

“Fine. More room for me then,” Taissa says, and you listne to her footsteps going towards the attic, then up the ladder.

Laura Lee keeps praying.

Eventually, Shauna and Jackie start whispering, and Shauna ends up going to the attic as well.

You sigh, and try to go to bed, the fire dying down, the room becoming shrouded in darkness.

Someone taps your shoulder.

Your makeshift bed was still next to Natalie’s, a remnant of when you were just friends, and maybe if you weren’t so drained from the seance, you would have moved to another spot.

“Y/N.” You pretend you’re asleep, you can’t face her, not yet, not right now. She shakes you. “Turn around, please.”

You stay silent, trying to control your breathing, scared of everything that could happen.

She exhales. “I know you’re not asleep. C’mon.” She tugs on your arm, and unwillingly, you roll over, shifting so there’s still space between you, staring at her.

“What?” your voice doesn’t come out quite as firm as you want it to. You sound like a child trying to hide the fact they’re crying.

“Are you okay? After tonight? I mean, you were like right in front of her, being really smart and shit, but- still.”

Your shoulders relax, and you wish that they didn’t.

“‘M fine, yeah.”

She smiles lightly, awkwardly, and you feel bad that you’ve caused all this weirdness between the two of you.

“Hey, I- I know its fucked up, but, can we talk?”

“Natalie, I’m tired-”

She leans forward and brushes her lips against yours.

She closes her eyes, but you’re left shocked, your eyes wide open, your lips parted, hers pressed hard against yours, not even a kiss, like she just wants to say that she did it, check a box. She’s just pressing her lips to yours, and your stomach flips and turns because you love it.

She pulls back, and takes a breath, so you can feel it on your skin.

“Sorry. For that. I-I just didn’t know how to tell you-”

All you can do is stare at her.

You can hear sirens go off in your mind, screaming danger, danger at every turn. This could all crash and burn like everything else that’s happened in these past few weeks- but maybe Natalie is just a single speck of violence in a world full of it, and maybe having someone on your side, someone with you, is just want you need.

Just what you want.

Not just someone to protect you, to be with, but you want her.

You’ve spent so long in these woods denying it because you were scared of losing her, of losing your friendship- but after tonight? The worst has already happened to you. You didn’t choose it. You’ve already been plagued with violence and this time- you want to choose it. You want to choose her.

You choose her, and press your lips against hers, violence in a world of violence, and don’t pull away until you’ve completely sunk into her, into her ultraviolence.

Loving her is violence, but you’re choosing it, and this violence feels like love.

—-

taglist:

@sweetdayme4427 @dreaming-for-an-escape @peachydoki

[miraclesabound]

All of This is Temporary

Summary: What should have been Mikey and Reader's special night goes sideways, and unfortunately, it never gets fixed.

Pairing: Mikey Berzatto x F!Reader, pre-relationship

Notes: This idea of Mikey and his friend getting thrown out of some VIP event came to me in a dream (and the music cue as well). A surprise cameo from one of my other favorite characters from a different show, because he showed up in the dream too. Also on AO3.

Warnings: Spoilers for The Bear, canon-typical language, classism, unrequited (?) love, addiction themes, tragic ending (mention of Mikey's suicide)

Tags: @pettyprocrastination, @cinewhore, @phoenixhalliwell, @nolita-fairytale

NOVEMBER 2021

The movie that Mikey won tickets for is at Doc Films , and given the place's history, you and Mikey are almost more dressed for an opera than a movie. He's done out in an old but clean tux, bow tie and cummerbund included - and you bought yourself a silver dress with matching clutch. You may not be a couple, but you take internal satisfaction in knowing how good you two look together right now.

The main thing that's important to you is that, at least from what you can tell, Mikey is fully sober this evening. You know you're not his keeper, but you feel some pride on his behalf - whatever he's strugging with, he's made the effort for you tonight, and that warms your heart.

However, that warmth sours in your stomach when you actually get to the theater. When you and Mikey walk in, it's clear that this is a much smaller event than you thought - and that you and Mikey are WILDLY overdressed. Of the maybe twenty total people there, the only other person dressed formally is a gruff-looking man whose hair is almost as dark as Mikey's is. In his case, he's wearing a strikingly modern all-black suit.

Mikey smiles when he sees the other man and gives him a hearty handshake. "Roy fuckin' Kent! What brings ya this way?"

Roy shrugs, but he accepts Mikey's handshake just the same. "Mikey Berzatto, ya old dog - just takin' some travel time - Coach Lasso fuckin' insisted... And who's this, then?"

Mikey introduces you, explaining that Roy had visited The Beef by accident a few years back during an exhibition tour in the States. "You better come in for a couple sandwiches tomorrow for lunch, ya hear me?" he tells Roy. "Won't take no for an answer!"

"Wouldn't miss it," Roy says. You and Mikey take your seats on Roy's other side.

A woman a few seats away chimes in with: "Oh, you two look so nice - is that your tux?" You don't care for the look of her - she comes across like someone trying to draw Mikey's sister Natalie from a mirror image only.

You want to believe that she's just being nice, but something about her tone is venomous, and Mikey must feel the same way. His response is icy. " 'Course it's mine, why wouldn't it be?"

"You're Michael Berzatto, right?"

"Yeah?"

"My cousins love your shop - I guess I'm just wondering why a sandwich shop owner would need to buy a tux instead of renting one; that's all."

If you didn't know better, you'd think she was trying to call you and Mikey tacky. Apparently Roy feels the same way, because he leans over towards her and says, "Oi, Pam, knock it off, yeah? Movie's startin'."

"Pam..." you think to yourself. "Why does that name sound familiar?" The lights turn off, and you smile to yourself when you hear a familiar musical sting playing for the movie intro.

"Don't call me by my name...all of this is temporary..."

You know this song very well, and you can't help but hum along. To your pleasant surprise, you swear that Roy is humming too. Who knew such a brash guy liked Halsey? Neither of you notice Mikey staring at you like you hung the moon and stars.

Suddenly the lights come up, and that woman who looks like Natalie's evil twin is standing in front of you, a sickening smile on her face. "Miss, you're going to have to leave," she tells you. "This is an exclusive event, and you're causing a disturbance."

Roy, God bless the man, speaks up for you - and thank goodness, because you feel like you're going to vaporize from embarrassment. "Pam, it's nothin', I was humming too."

"You're a VIP, Roy, and she isn't. It's my movie, and if I want her and her ridiculous disco ball of a dress out of here, that's my prerogative." Shit, you realize. This is Pam Stratford, the writer that Mikey enjoys so much. No wonder he was excited to get these tickets...

Mikey pulls you into his side - almost as if he expects Pam to take a swing at you. "Listen, I've always liked your work, but you don't get to talk to my g- - my friend like that - we got our tickets fair and square."

You can see that flash in Mikey's eyes that means either a bender or a fight is coming, and you don't want to see him arrested. Pam seems like the type to call the police in faster than they're needed. Pushing lightly against his chest, you say "Bear, it's ok, I'll just go..."

"Then I'm leavin' too," he says. "Roy, I'll catch ya tomorrow - Pam? You can go fuck yourself for bein' a snobby bitch." The silence is deafening as you two leave the theater, but the outraged look on Pam's face is almost worth it.

You shudder as you step out into the night air, even with Mikey holding you and blasting like a furnace. "It's cold - take me home?"

"Yeah, let's get you back before you freeze."

--

The train ride back to your neighborhood is quiet, and it's not until the two of you are walking up to your stoop that Mikey says, "Pam was wrong - you look gorgeous in that dress, and that's God's honest truth."

You smile at him. "You clean up pretty well yourself."

"Do we...wanna try this again some other time?" he asks, holding your purse for you as you dig out your keys. "Maybe not a movie, but some other excuse to dress up?"

"I'd like that, Bear," you agree. "Let's aim for after Christmas - I know how nutty things get for you during December."

"Then it's a date?" Mikey asks. He doesn't mean to put you on the spot, but if you don't feel the same way he does, he'd rather know now.

Your smile grows even wider. "It's a date - we'll nail down details after New Years." With a sudden burst of bravery, you hug him tight and kiss his cheek. "G'night, my bear."

--

Unfortunately, the holidays madness makes Mikey spiral in a bad way, and he never texts you back about the date. In fact, you don't realize as you turn to open your door that this will be the last time you see him alive.