#jim c hines
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Let's talk books. Sorted in threes by vibes.
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I Support Women's Wrongs (murder, slaughter and body horror galore).
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How to Become the Dark Lord and Die Trying ⭐⭐⭐⭐½ by Django Wexler - A woman from Earth is dropped into a magical realm, meant to save the Kingdom from the FoRCes of DaRKneSSss... except, unfortunately that might have been a thousand years worth of time loops ago, so it's rather time to lose one's temper and decide to become the Dark Lord herself.
Main character -> basically Deadpool (measured in sanity, humor and levels of bisexual horniness)).
Someone You Can Build a Nest In ⭐⭐⭐⭐ by John Wiswell - Shesheshen, a shapechanging monster who's rudely interrupted during her hibernation by hunters. Manages to to eat one of them, unfortunately she also gets shot by an arrow and falls off a cliff. On the bright side she meets a lovely human woman she might end up falling in love with so much... she'll want to build a nest in her (it's possible there's some Cultural Differences that need to be worked through).
Hench ⭐⭐⭐⭐ by Natalie Zina Walschots - Anna's latest temp job for a villain (because even supervillains need office help) ends with her carelessly injured by a superhero, laid off and with injured mobility for the foreseeable future (because human bodies don't see much difference between getting hit by a truck and getting moved out of way by someone able to pick up a truck). Angry, disillusioned, and looking for some vengeful payback she starts compiling the statistics of exactly how much suffering gets left behind the heroes and in quick order finds a new job working for one of the worst supervillains in the neighborhood.
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Extremely Competent Women Show Up to Fix Everyone's Shit (with a whallop of romance which was actually sweet instead of irritating)
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The Witchwood Knot ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ by Olivia Atwater - Winifred Hall was invited to the Witchwood Manor under the pretense of being the governess for a very bratty kid, but when said boy suddenly turns into a very quiet and perfectly bland boy overnight it's very obvious her charge has been stolen by faeries (and it might have something to do with the actual reason she's there). Rescue however is complicated by some factors, one, there being something terribly dark and wrong about the house (normal houses don't have screaming faces in the walls), another, the faerie man posing as the manor's butler who would very much like to make her run screaming the way so many servants had before her (unfortunately for him, she's not even half as scared of him as she is the eyes of the father of her charge).
This one's about dealing with past trauma, and otherworldly terrors paling in comparison to mundane monsters, set in a very beautiful and dark and shiver-inducing Victorian time world where the Fair Folk are very real.
(Same world as her Regency Faerie Tales trilogy that Started with Half a Soul but it's not necessary to read that one first to enjoy this one)
Keeper of Enchanted Rooms ⭐⭐⭐⭐½ by Charlie N. Holmberg - Merritt Fernsby inherits a house only to be immediately taken hostage by what turns out to be a very stubborn and opinionated magical house. Hulda Larkin of the Boston Institute for the Keeping of Enchanted Rooms goes there to facilitate the relationship between the house and its new owner.
It's supposed to be a very simple job. Unfortunately there's a third POV character in this book (no, not the Whimbrel House, though I adore that house and *insert here the Rosa Diaz gif about her new puppy and how she would kill everyone in this room and then herself if anything were to happen to that dog*). Anyway, they're a bit... uhhh... let's go with Bad News.
Emily Wilde's Encyclopedia of Faeries ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ by Heather Fawcett - As one might expect from the title, Emily (a Cambridge scholar) wants to write the first ever encyclopedia of faeries. And she's brilliant enough to do it, what she's terrible at is people (*insert autistic character alert here*).
Someone else might then say it's lucky that a fellow scholar with a far easier time at charming people has stuck his toes in her reaserch trip into the Hidden Ones... that person however doesn't understand how irritating, frustrating and maddening her academic rival Wendell Bambleby actually is.
What follows is a story filled with winter snows, some terrible fae, some adorable fae, some not-very-secret fae, the goodest of good dogs, and lots and lots of squabbling. It's the best.
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Dark and Impactful Stories about Children Who Decide on Their Own Paths
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A Skinful of Shadows ⭐⭐⭐⭐½ by Frances Hardinge - Kate, an orphan and the illegitimate daughter of some stuffy (and evil) aristocrats runs away because being a bastard doesn't mean she didn't inherit the family magic that allows her to get possessed by the dead.
A dead bear ghost is one thing, a Get Out situation is something else entirely.
A Sorceress Comes to Call ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ by T. Kingfisher - Cordelia isn't allowed friends or the privacy of closed doors, and whenever she's done something she shouldn't - a category too unpredictable to guard against - she's not allowed power over her own body.
Because her mother is an evil sorceress (think Regina and Cora... except somehow even worse). An evil sorceress that has found herself a Squire to lure into a marriage.
Hester is an old maid living with her brother, a Squire (well look at them coincidences), when said brother acquires a woman clearly set on his fortune. The plan is only to save her brother, except Hester can't help noticing how the woman's daughter keeps flinching in her mother's presence.
In The Lives of Puppets ⭐⭐⭐⭐ by TJ Klune - A family can be an android inventor, his human son (*homoromantic asexual alert*), a sadistic nurse droid, and a very emotional roomba.
And it can be a very happy family. Until one uncovers and wakes up an android that shares a very Skynet past with one's father, said father gets kidnapped, and one has to go on a journey to get him back.
(A book I like to call Sci-fi Reverse Pinocchio)
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Unraveling an Unjust System (and a hero that - on a scale from occasionally to constantly - hears a disembodied voice directly in their heads okay the connection between these three is a bit of a stretch but they're all great books so shut up)
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Hell for Hire ⭐⭐⭐⭐½ by Rachel Aaron - 5000 years ago Gilgamesh conquered the heavens, enslaved the demons and made it so that the only road to magic humanity had access, was through him.
Now, however a mercenary team made up of free demons gets hired by a Blackwood witch to protect him (and his familiar, the talking cat named Boston) while he puts down roots (literally) inside the new forest grove he's about to start so that he can stand up against the warlocks after him.
The witch quickly becomes the best client Bex and her crew have ever had (after all, warlocks under the rule of the Eternal King Gilgamesh are slavers of their kind, they are delighted at the chance to kill some).
Vespertine ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ by Margaret Rogerson - In a world where the veil between the living and the dead has been kinda broken Artemisia (*another autistic character alert*) is training to be a Gray Sister (magic nun).
Until her convent gets attacked by possessed soldiers and she has no choice but to pick up a Saint's Relic containing a malevolent revenant to protect it.
Problem. Only a Vespertine is supposed to do it. Another problem. The only one "alive" who can teach her to be a Vespertine is the revenant. Another another problem. The revenant cannot be trusted and if she loses control to it, the death toll will be counted in cities.
Terminal Alliance ⭐⭐⭐⭐¾ by Jim C. Hines - Post Zombie Apocalypse, where some aliens showed up, sort of cured the zombies and took the (mostly) cured zombies into their military.
Which leads us to Marion Adamopoulos, also known as Mops, the Leutenant in charge of Shipboard Hygene and Sanitation of the Earth Mercenary Corps Ship Pufferfish.
Right up until a bioweapon turns the entire crew except her crew back into zombies. Congratulations, she's the captain now.
(Space Janitors save the universe story).
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#book recs#fantasy books#science fiction books#book rec#how to become the dark lord and die trying#someone you can build a nest in#hench#the witchwood knot#keeper of enchanted rooms#emily wilde’s encyclopaedia of faeries#a skinful of shadows#a sorceress comes to call#in the lives of puppets#hell for hire#vespertine#terminal alliance#django wexler#john wiswell#natalie zina walschots#olivia atwater#charlie n holmberg#heather fawcett#frances hardinge#t kingfisher#tj klune#rachel aaron#margaret rogerson#jim c hines#terapsina rambles#terapsina's book rambles
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If you are still doing art requests. Jig wearing a FISH FEAR ME WOMEN WANT ME (the women want me part is crossed out) shirt and Ryslind and Barius as fish are flopping at his feet. I feel like the whole turning people into fosh thing needs to be talked about more
I love you and your mind
#Moo’s art#goblin quest#goblin quest book#jim c hines#jig dragonslayer#Jig goblin quest#Goblin quest spoilers
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ROUND 2B, MATCH 3 OUT OF 4!
Propaganda Under the Cut:
Lirea:
[No Propaganda Submitted]
Ponyo:
determined 5yo girls are more powerful than god
PONYO!!!!
As a child i did not even realize this was a little merm adaptation, but it really reads. She is sooo strange and other worldly and the movie absolutely captures that dreamlike fairy tale vibe
Ponyo a roughly five-year-old magical goldfish who can transform into a frog-type thing and a human girl. She's the eldest daughter of the literal goddess of the sea and a former human sailor given immortality. She falls in love with the five-year-old boy who cares for her and is thrilled to explore his ordinary yet magical world. She's bouncy, exuberant, and joyful. She loves ham. She doesn't have to give up her voice.
ponyo ponyo ponyo little fishie in the sea!
Little fishy
THEY LOVE HAM
#lirea#the mermaid's madness#jim c hines#jim hines#ponyo#studio ghibli#the little mermaid#little mermaid#fairytale#fairy tale#poll tournament#poll bracket#character polls#polls#round 2#round 2b#the little merpoll
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Sketches of the protagonists from the Princess series by Jim C Hines -- Talia (Sleeping Beauty), Snow White, and Danielle (Cinderella), our heroines post-happily ever after teaming up to fight bad guys and lead most unconventional lives. As you can guess, it's a fun send-up to the classic fairy tales, very action-packed and humorous. But it also has very serious moments and themes, some deconstructions of fairy tale tropes, and unique interpretations of the characters. It's hard to pick a favorite among the girls, Talia being superficially uncaring (but really not) and extremely capable, Snow White something of a Machiavellian flirt, and Danielle being the nurturing but sometimes powerfully angry leader of the group.
#princess series#jim c hines#snow white curtana#talia malak el-dashat#danielle de glas#sleeping beauty#snow white#cinderella#sketch#2022
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vote yes if you have finished the entire book.
vote no if you have not finished the entire book.
(faq · submit a book)
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I don't know a Single person who's read the Goblin Quest series and it kills me every day. Guyss go read it. It's a parody of dnd and pulp fantasy tropes, it's a comedy and characters have 3 breakdowns per book, the main character Does Not Get romance on a fundamental level, whenever the protag is a loser (93% of the story) it's really endearing, (the other 7% is him being really cool and it's awesome), it's a story about cowardice and trust, it will make you laugh and be VERY concerned in the same scene, everyone hates each other so the little moments of genuine kindness shown are so meaningful. please go read it mwah
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ROUND 1B, MATCH 5 OUT OF 8!
Propaganda Under the Cut:
Shirahoshi:
Why she's a Little Mermaid: She is a teenage mermaid princess who lives in an underwater city, was locked in a tower her whole life, and she wants to see the outside world and live on the surface. She also made a promise with the main character to one day see a forest on the surface with him. The subversion: She was locked in a tower because of a creepy stalker trying to kill her. She wants to live on the surface because her mom, who tirelessly campaigned for Mermaids/Fishmen to have equal rights and live on the surface, was politically assassinated and Shirahoshi has inherited her will. She's also not little, she's HUGE, almost 39 feet long.
Lirea:
[No Propaganda Submitted]
#shirahoshi#lirea#one piece#the mermaid's madness#jim c hines#jim hines#the little mermaid#little mermaid#fairy tale#fairytale#poll tournament#poll bracket#character polls#polls#round 1#round 1b#the little merpoll
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This has big Libriomancer vibes. @jimhines
This is the first of two pieces I did for the @broadsandbroadswords zine! My heartfelt thanks to the mods for drawing me out of my comfort zone — it was an honor and a joy being part of this amazing project!
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#bookquotes
I’ve read a few novels recently that have clueless villains for comedic purposes. I think I like it. It reminds me of Glory off tv show Buffy the Vampire Slayer, or Dawn Budgie (played by Melissa McCarthy) in film Identity Thief. Give me more delusional antagonists! Anybody with me?
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#amreading#antagonist#AusBookBlogger#book#book quotes#Casey Carlisle#comedy#Fiction#Jim C. Hines#Novel#reading#science fiction#TBR#Terminal Alliance#villains#writerslife#Writing#writingcommunity
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$1.99 on Kobo too
Popping in for a quick bit of self promo.
TERMINAL ALLIANCE is a $1.99 ebook deal, at least here in the U.S. No idea how long this one will last. Space Janitors and military SF shenanigans. Tell your friends!
#jim c hines#terminal alliance#janitors of the post-apocalypse#sale#ebook sale#book recommendations#book recs
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Libriomancer Sale!
Woke up this morning to an alert that LIBRIOMANCER, the first book of the Magic ex Libris series, is on sale for $1.99 at Amazon and elsewhere.
Just in case you or someone you know still hasn't picked up a copy :-)
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Queer Book List
I've just updated my complete list of LGBT+ novels ever read (as far as I can remember). Not including short story collections, comics, non-fiction, or things I've completely forgotten.
I'm not including books where a main character's sexuality was only implied (it's got to be clear on the page), and this list contains queer main and secondary characters only, not background characters that play little part in the story.
I don't read a lot of Young Adult, so assume these are all adult-oriented unless otherwise stated.
I'm not judging nor rating nor recommending any of these; it's purely a list of books I've finished.
True Colors #1: Conventionally Yours, by Annabeth Albert gay male main characters, romance, happy ending
The Geek Who Saved Christmas, by Annabeth Albert gay male main characters, romance, happy ending
Perfect Harmony #2: Love Me Tenor, by Annabeth Albert gay male main character, gay male side characters, romance, happy ending
Knit, Purl, a Baby and a Girl, by Hettie Bell bisexual female main character, lesbian main character, romance, happy ending
Master of One, by Dani Bennett and Jaida Jones gay male main characters, trans woman side character, high fantasy, unfinished series
Cesare Aldo #1: City of Vengeance, by D. V. Bishop Cesare Aldo #2: The Darkest Sin, by D. V. Bishop gay male main character, gay male side characters, mystery, historical, unfinished series
The Crow: The Lazarus Heart, by Poppy Z. Brite gay male main character, trans woman main character, horror, unhappy ending - it's The Crow
Exquisite Corpse, by Poppy Z. Brite gay male main characters, horror, unhappy ending
Lost Souls, by Poppy Z. Brite gay male main characters, horror, I don't remember the ending
The Black Magician #2: The Novice, by Trudi Canavan The Black Magician #3: The High Lord, by Trudi Canavan gay male side characters, high fantasy, happy ending for the gay characters
The Hours, by Michael Cunningham lesbian main characters, bisexual female main characters, general fiction, I don't remember the ending
Stars in My Pocket Like Grains of Sand, by Samuel R. Delany gay male main characters, science fiction, unfinished series
The High King's Golden Tongue, by Megan Derr gay male main characters, romance, high fantasy, happy ending
Nightrunner Books #1: Luck in the Shadows, by Lynn Flewelling Nightrunner Books #2: Stalking Darkness, by Lynn Flewelling Nightrunner Books #3: Traitor's Moon, by Lynn Flewelling gay male main characters, high fantasy, everyone is alive and well as of book 3, I haven't read the rest of the series
Reforged, by Seth Haddon gay male main characters, high fantasy, happy ending
The Well of Loneliness, by Radclyffe Hall lesbian main character, historical classic, unhappy ending
Princesses #1: The Stepsister Scheme, by Jim C. Hines Princesses #2: The Mermaid's Madness, by Jim C. Hines Princesses #3: Red Hood's Revenge, by Jim C. Hines lesbian main character, fantasy, fairy tale, everyone is alive and well as of book 3, I haven't read book 4 yet
Blood & Smoke #1 - Blood Books #1: Blood Price, by Tanya Huff Blood & Smoke #2 - Blood Books #2: Blood Trail, by Tanya Huff Blood & Smoke #3 - Blood Books #3: Blood Lines, by Tanya Huff Blood & Smoke #4 - Blood Books #4: Blood Pact, by Tanya Huff Blood & Smoke #5 - Blood Books #5: Blood Debt, by Tanya Huff Blood & Smoke #6 - Smoke Series #1: Smoke and Shadows, by Tanya Huff Blood & Smoke #7 - Smoke Series #2: Smoke and Mirrors, by Tanya Huff Blood & Smoke #8 - Smoke Series #3: Smoke and Ashes, by Tanya Huff bisexual male main character, gay male side character (main in the Smoke Books), low fantasy, humour, mostly happy ending
Torin Kerr #1: Confederation #1: Valor's Choice, by Tanya Huff Torin Kerr #2: Confederation #2: The Better Part of Valor, by Tanya Huff Torin Kerr #3: Confederation #3: The Heart of Valor, by Tanya Huff Torin Kerr #4: Confederation #4: Valor's Trial, by Tanya Huff Torin Kerr #5: Confederation #5: The Truth of Valor, by Tanya Huff Torin Kerr #6: Peacekeeper #1: An Ancient Peace, by Tanya Huff Torin Kerr #7: Peacekeeper #2: A Peace Divided, by Tanya Huff Torin Kerr #8: Peacekeeper #3: The Privilege of Peace, by Tanya Huff bisexual main characters, bisexual side characters, military space opera, humour, some queer characters survive, others do not - it's set during a war
Gale Girls #1: The Enchantment Emporium, by Tanya Huff Gale Girls #2: The Wild Ways, by Tanya Huff Gale Girls #3: The Future Falls, by Tanya Huff bisexual main characters, bisexual side characters, low fantasy, humour, happy ending
Keeper's Chronicles #1: Summon the Keeper, by Tanya Huff Keeper's Chronicles #2: The Second Summoning, by Tanya Huff Keeper's Chronicles #3: Long Hot Summoning, by Tanya Huff lesbian background character in books 1 & 2 becomes main in book 3, low fantasy, humour, happy ending
Quarters #1: Sing The Four Quarters, by Tanya Huff Quarters #2: Fifth Quarter, by Tanya Huff Quarters #3: No Quarter, by Tanya Huff Quarters #4: The Quartered Sea, by Tanya Huff bisexual main characters, bisexual side characters, high fantasy, humour, happy endings
The Fire's Stone, by Tanya Huff gay male main character, bisexual male main character, asexual female main character, poly relationship, high fantasy, happy ending
The Silvered, by Tanya Huff I don't remember, but considering it's Tanya Huff, probably everyone's bisexual, high fantasy, happy ending
Into the Broken Lands, by Tanya Huff gay male main character, bisexual side characters, high fantasy, horror elements, mostly happy ending
The House in the Cerulean Sea, by T. J. Klune gay male main characters, fairy tale, fantasy, happy ending
Angels in America, by Tony Kushner (play) gay male main characters, play, drama, happy ending
The Last Herald-Mage #1: Magic's Pawn, by Mercedes Lackey The Last Herald-Mage #2: Magic's Promise, by Mercedes Lackey The Last Herald-Mage #3: Magic's Price, by Mercedes Lackey gay male main characters, high fantasy, unhappy ending?
Bergman Brothers #5: Everything For You, by Chloe Liese gay male main characters, sports romance, happy ending
Ash, by Malinda Lo lesbian main character, fairy tale, young adult, I don't remember the ending
So This is Ever After, by F.T. Lukens gay male main characters, young adult, romance, high fantasy, happy ending
Winter's Orbit, by Everina Maxwell gay male main characters, science fiction, unfinished series
Lindsay Gordon Crime Series #6: Hostage to Murder, by V. L. McDermid (Val McDermid) lesbian main character, mystery, happy ending, I haven't read the rest of the series
Trick of the Dark, by Val McDermid lesbian main characters, lesbian side characters, mystery, I don't remember the ending
Iron Council, by China Miéville gay male side character, dystopian fantasy, I don't remember the ending
Hero, by Perry Moore gay male main characters, superheroes, young adult, happy ending
A Land Fit for Heroes #1: The Steel Remains, Richard K. Morgan gay male main character, lesbian main character, high fantasy, I don't remember the ending and I haven't read the sequel
Love & Luck #5: Two Men and a Baby, by Isla Olsen gay male main characters, gale male side characters, romance, happy ending
Captive Prince Series #1: Captive Prince, by C. S. Pacat Captive Prince Series #2: Prince's Gambit, by C. S. Pacat Captive Prince Series #3: Kings Rising, by C. S. Pacat bisexual male main character, gay male main character, bisexual side characters, high fantasy/romance, happy ending
The Monkey's Mask, by Dorothy Porter lesbian main character, bisexual female side character, poetry, mystery, complicated but satisfying ending
Wild Surmise, by Dorothy Porter bisexual female main character, poetry, general fiction, I don't remember the ending
She Drives Me Crazy, by Kelly Quindlen lesbian main characters, lesbian side characters, romance, young adult, happy ending
Cry to Heaven, by Anne Rice bisexual male main character, historical, revenge story, happy ending
The Wolf Gift, by Anne Rice gay male side character, low fantasy, happy ending
The Love Study #2: The Hate Project, by Kris Ripper gay male main characters, gay male side character, genderqueer side character, romance, happy ending
Carry On Series #1: Carry On, by Rainbow Rowell Carry On Series #2: Wayward Son, by Rainbow Rowell bisexual male main character, gay male main character, low fantasy, young adult, everyone is alive and well as of book 2, I haven't read book 3 yet
Get Over It!, by Phillip Scott gay male main characters, mystery, humour, I don't remember the ending
Christopher Marlowe Spy Thriller #1: The Queen's Gold, by Steven Veerapen gay male main character, mystery, spy thriller, historical, unfinished series
Fingersmith, by Sarah Waters lesbian main characters, historical, heist story, happy ending
Tipping the Velvet, by Sarah Waters lesbian main characters, historical, happy ending
Running With Lions, by Julian Winters gay male main characters, gay male side characters, young adult, sports romance, happy ending
The Stone Gods, by Jeanette Winterson lesbian main characters, gay male main characters, ostensibly general fiction but actually more like speculative fiction, implied happy ending
Orlando, by Virginia Woolf bisexual genderqueer main character, historical, I don't remember the ending
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vote yes if you have finished the entire book.
vote no if you have not finished the entire book.
(faq · submit a book)
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Possibly try The Janitors Of The Post-Apocalypse. I haven't read the third one yet (which I should do, it's right there and I loved the others) but the main crew are reborn zombies. They don't really have much in the way of biological urges even as far as food and pain are concerned, let alone sex.
Does anyone have any recommendations for ace-friendly sci fi for someone who has already read and loved Murderbot and Ancillary Justice? Please nothing by Becky Chambers because I tried that and couldn't stand it.
#book recommendations#Jim C Hines#janitors of the post-apocalypse#it's great#everything with Puffy is just 😘#and they're all wildly underqualified foe their current positions#it's nice reading about people who are a reasonable amount bad at new things and not prodigies
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Going to send a fan email to my fav ever author tomorrow lol. I'm so excited. He really changed my life a lot so AAAAA
#moo's words#he is jim c hines if u are curious. i will not shut up about goblin quest EVER which is a positive trait of mine#please if you have read it talk to me about it. idk anyone else who has besides my parents#who i made read it
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ROUND 1B, MATCH 2 OUT OF 16!
Propaganda Under the Cut:
Cinderellis:
I submit him more as early cannon fodder than anything else, though he is a very fun and interesting character to follow in the 150ish page book we find him in, where he fulfills both the Cinderella main points of mythic importance, as well as a Ukrainian fairy tale involving the rule of three and how it applies to precious metals, and the materials one may use on a quest. Also, both he, and the girl he eventually marries are just fun characters to see the viewpoints of.
Danielle:
This series begins after the HEA and Danielle doesn't realize how much magic is really out there in the world. She is a wonderfully complex character who isn't afraid to say what she doesn't know. Really keeps the embodiment of Cinderella as a kind person
#cinderpoll#round 1#round 1b#cinderellis#cinderellis and the glass hill#gail carson levine#the princess tales#princess tales#danielle whiteshore#danielle whiteshore (nee de glas)#the princess series#jim c hines#the stepsister scheme#cinderella#fairytale#poll tournament#poll bracket#polls#character polls
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