#my aroace experience

[fizzamess]

Keep the aroace positivity flowing (day 8):

Our aroace experience.

🧡💛🤍🩵💙

What was the most fundamental part about your aro/ace/aroace journey?

My story:

From a very early age I realized that my experience with love and attraction (in its most popular sense) was different from the others. I would idealize someone in my head but strip them from any characteristic that would make them “real humans” because the idea of them being too real and too close to me made me feel uncomfortable.

Sadly when I was a teen I started positioning myself in romantic and/or sexual scenarios because I thought that was what meant to be human (you can see the internalized aphobia and amatonormativity weighing on me). I thought if I made someone else feel good (romantically or sexually) I would somehow find the right person that would give me the kind of intimacy I longed for.

It was just until March 2024 that I became aware of the aspec community and everything began to fall into place one by one: first, my asexuality. Second, my agender identity. Third, my aromanticism. It took a whole lot of deconstruction of my personality, facing my worst traumas, and hours of therapy to finally start feeling like the truest version of myself I’ve ever been.

What I can say for sure is that:

Stripping myself from the weight of social pressure in regards to sexuality and romanticism allowed me to build the most intimate relationships with my closest family and friends.

And this is only the beggining of a life journey being aroace.

[xx-ace-raccoonz-xx]

Sharing my Aspec Experience

When I was a teenager (circa 2013-2015), I initially did not identify as asexual. Simply put it, I thought I was just a heterosexual girl who was just celibate or not interested in intercourse.

However, one day in October of 2015 when I was 15, I was watching a video by a cartoon-reviewer YouTuber and it got to the part where he mentioned he was "asexual". So, I got curious and searched up the definition of that word. At that moment, though I had my doubts, it all started coming together. Perhaps I was doubting it because at the time, I was also active in the furry fandom (and still am), and that crowd is known for being a bit...promiscuous in certain circles.

As time marched on, all of the doubt began to fade away as more of my friends started having sexual relationships and getting married. Eventually, I found out about the word "aromantic" and realized that this fit me, as well. As a younger ace, I unfortunately started out as more sex-negative and think that I had no business being in the LGBTQIA+ Community (despite the "A" being there and standing for asexual, aromantic, agender, and possibly ally). However, I gradually became more sex-positive as I got older, albeit a bit repulsed by the idea of myself having it. I also realized that I kinda do fit in the Community (as much as certain people like to exclude anything past the "T" or sometimes the "B".) XD

Thankfully, a lot of the little aphobia I have experienced has been online, with only one possible case of it IRL (a friend telling me that I might just be a "late bloomer" and that "I'll find someone that I'm attracted to"). A lot of people that have found out IRL were actually pretty cool with it (perhaps because the area of the Appalachian Mountains I live has a lot of genuinely nice people who may also be LGBTQIA+).

TL;DR: I think I have always been aroace, but I simply didn't figure out the terms for it until my mid-teen years.

[since-times-long-forgotten]

I did technically have a made up crush but I thought it was a real crush and it was one made without any prompting of “who’s your crush.” I simultaneously liked being around someone but also being around them made me slightly nervous and uncomfortable at many times, which I thought was the “nervous butterflies” but no they actually were not a very nice person to other people

Arospec Bingo Card requested by anon

I finished the card! Have a go, and feel free to tag any aro friends :)

People who wanted to be tagged:

@feelingthedisaster

Edit: I love that we all just collectively decided it must be filled in green lol

[morally-earl-gray]

part of being aroace is going "we're too young to date, we're just kids" for most of your life because it was true. and then you're in high school and suddenly everyone is dating, and you're still going "we're too young to date, we're just kids". and then your classmates are fucking in the school bathrooms and your friends are coming to school covered in hickeys and your best friend has a boyfriend that she plans to marry, and you're still going "we're too young for this, we're just kids." And then you realize that you're not a kid anymore, you're not too young for this, and that you're just... different

[sunburstsandmoonshadows]

everyone's very sure about what they have going on and nobody's confused about it (and also dipper is here :) )

[fiftypiercings]

I can't believe I decided to read orv on a whim because I just wanted a good manhwa with no romance subplot and here I am knees deep into the novel questioning my whole life because whatever these mfs have got going on is much more nastier and visceral than any romance.

[ewwww-what]

FIG AND RIZ INTERACTIONS PLEASE PLEASE PLEASEEEEEE (bonus points for aroace riz) ILYY

Yeah okay

[cherrytea556]

Aroace

I figured out through realizing that I'm not attracted nor desire anyone romantically/sexually. My aroness was discovered before my aceness for me.

I've seen some representation regarding aroaces and aces like lilith from toh (aroace) and todd from bojack horseman (asexual) and it was really nice to see. I haven't seen much representation. regarding aromantic people though, I did research it at one point but I haven't seen those types of medias yet. I wish aros got more recognised in media because it always seems like were left out in a way.

Yes, I definitely did. Main reason was my age since I was questioning my sexuality 2 years ago being aroace along with questioning if I was lesbian or bisexual (despite not being into women or anyone apart of finding them pretty). I only found out last year since it's been 3 years as a teen and I still don't feel any nor desire any romantic/sexual attraction (hell i didn't know kids my age were dating or having sex cuz it wasn't on my mind since then) and it still continued even when i considered myself old enough to experience it now so why not?

Nope, mainly because I'm closeted to my family. I'm more public in school where classmates keep making the old 'aerodynamic' joke whenever I bring up me being aro though but no one seemed to mind. Plus my friends are queer too and they support me which made my experience better.

I think I would come to terms with my sexuality more earlier if I had that kind of representation as a kid (especially aroace kids) since I feel like I would resonate with them in a way.

Aroace makes sense for me because stuff like sex and romance weren't even on my mind throughout my whole life, I just never seemed to care for it. Plus there's nothing wrong with being aroace and how it can be for anyone at any age, children can be aroace just like straight or gay kids. They won't be miserable or need fixing just because their not into romance or sex and it's definitely not a phase. You may fallen in love or had sex in a later time but that's not for everyone, with 8 billion people on this planet, why not assume theirs someone out there who never fall in love or want to have sex? Those are basically what I have to say.

Hi it's Hampter and I got questions for aroace indivdials or aro and ace peoplle.

I am doing research project for school about rep for aroace people in the film industry but I would like some of everyone's opinions.

I can't use our aroace experience blog as a source because I didn't actually "interview" them. All quotes will be anonymous unless you give me a fake name that I can put down.

What do you identify as?

When did you figure out your sexuality?

What representation do you see in today's world concerning aroace individuals?

Did you struggle with coming to terms with your sexuality?

Did coming to terms with your sexuality hurt any aspects of your life? (Friends, family, relationships etc)

Do you think you would have benefited seeing characters in tv shows/movies growing up if they had aroace characters?

Is there anything you would like people to know about what being aroace means to you, or anything you would like to say about it?

You can answer all of them or some of them. You can DM me or reply in the comments.

Hugs!<3

[cosmicredcadet]

Ppl will say being AroAce is boring but personally I think the fact that I'm not like a majority of people and have a different experience of the world than them makes me rather unique and interesting.

[angryducktimemachine]

Aromanticism Zine but it's just my incoherent thoughts.

[lemonycranberries]

"No, I know they would be [supportive]! Honestly, I... I just can't be bothered to give everyone a vocab lesson" IS SO FUCKING REAL AAAHSJAHJHJHISJHJHK

[sminny-wew]

Me when I realize that being aro doesn't stop me from being a real person with real feelings and that I can in fact live a happy and meaningful life

[xx-ace-raccoonz-xx]

I personally can't separate my ace and aro identities.

For me, trying to separate them would be like trying to separate the neurons from the brain tissue. It would irreparably damage something and cause a whole lotta harm in both ways.

[dailyjermasparkle]

I've seen a lot of stuff going down on tumblr and I just wanted to let you all know that all aromantic, asexual, and aroace people are valid members of the LBGTQIA+ community. It doesn't matter if they are cishet or not.

[miitopia-cake]

I wish some aces would stop excluding other aces with complex sexual experiences. like I get why but you have to realize that being ace does not mean they don't enjoy sexual experiences and it's weird when you complain about allo people and boil it down to "people who have sexual experiences" and also shame people for their sex life and kinks as if your own community doesnt INCLUDE those people. because there are other aces out there who still masturbate, who feel sexually attracted to their own body, who barely experiences sexual attraction but still enjoys sex, who like consuming sexual media, who like sfw kink. being ace is so so much more complex than just "disliking sex". and also aromantic exclusionism in the same genre of posts is something i see a lot. especially aro allos. I hate hate hate seeing a community that SHOULD be inclusive boil down sexuality and exclude people.

[stargirl230]

Knight of Cups 🌷

My card illustration for the @novaandmali LGBTarot project! There are rainbows hidden in here if you squint :)

We're 99% funded with less than 4 days to go - help us get to 100% and unlock some cool stretch goals!

(no reposts; reblogs appreciated)