#most emotional part by far for me
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Kalafina Anniversary Live 2025
Part 3/?
#kalafina#kalafina anniversary live 2025#most emotional part by far for me#by the end sobbing like a baby#i hope we'll get to see them again someday hopefully with kajiura by their side#keiko#wakana#hikaru#gifsrt#kalafina anniversary live gifset series
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Ş̸̻͕̺́̚Ṕ̵̛̪̃Ȩ̷̳̫̿̾Ã̶̞̺̇͐͘K̷͈̿̎̇.
This damn comic is fucking A N C I E N T but as far as like, the content of it- not necessarily the art because I always hate my older art, but the presentation, what is objectively here- still feels right to me, so I'm sharing it. again
#I do not have it in me to even begin explaining the layers of this horseshit lmao#one of these days I can try to actually like. talk about this thing#this beast of teeth and turmoil and shimmer and shadow#something so wonderfully beautiful and sickly foul#genuinely irritates me that i struggle to talk about them at all because I have drawn them. So. Much.#More than any other fusion. even the ones canon to the show lol#yes that includes garnet#Like in-universe sure i can explain. Karma is a manifestation of the one thread druid and sven share- control#Druid has had none. His corruption- the withering- took away most of his agency. and Sven needs control like he needs air#and both of them whether they admit it to themselves or not are more afraid of themselves than of any external force#Sven fears his emotions. fears feeling them. Druid fears his illness and what it does to his body and mind#And so Karma is fragmented into the parts that they want the world to see and the parts they're afraid of#Keeper is that fear. that need to contain. to control. to suppress. to hide. to mask.#Unbound is all inhibitions removed. it's the release. the freedom. the desire. the exposed. the raw.#Unbound is everything that Sven and Druid would never tell anyone. Desires buried so far down that they themselves don't recognize it#But that's all in-universe. That's not quite the scope of what they mean in a grander meta sense#that is too intrinsically tied to me in a way that I can't explain#because if I could explain... then I wouldn't need them#fucking. what the fuck do I tag this i cant keep shoving Karma under the SU tag lmao#nugget rambles#my art#au/niverse
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#HERE THEY ARE 🤍🩵💜 in the place where they are the most beautiful#6 stars shining the brightest on stage together in front of buddies 🌠#congrats my precious girls on completing 2/3 concerts so wonderfully & good luck for the last one tonight!!#29 (!!!) songs & almost 3 hours long 🤯 theyre so incredibly hard working and their discography is so amazing#watching the videos give me so much joy 🥹 this is by far the most beautiful special & emotional part on the 10th anniversary celebrations#I can tell how much they wanted to do this for buddies and also for themselves/ eachother#their passion energy & smiles despite some not feeling their best… their interactions with eachother & buddies their goofiness 🥹 nothing#changed and Ive missed it all so much!! there is truly no other group like them 🥰#the set list being so long (Crush Wind trilogy the ballads Only 1.. also Apple & Mago being performed for the first Time in front of an#audience!!) & the songs/ choreos still sounds & looks so amazing & fresh! oh GLegend you are so iconic & timeless 🙌🏼#the VCRs the loud fanchants (UMJI YAAA) the girls being Yuju’s voice (my mainline 🥹) the random dance break the Always encore with them#jumping like crazy and making buddies jump too 😭 made me so happy I wish I could experience this so badly#the outfits all being so nice and when they switch to black for the sexy GFriend portion ooooh their versatility is crazy ❤️🔥#also loved how they reminded f*cking So Sungjin in the audience that the company used to only have 4 employees & how buddies refused to#cheer for him lmao#I’m beyond proud of these incredibly talented hardworking resilient kind girls 🤍🩵💜#WE LOVE YOU GODFRIEND THANK YOU AGAIN FOR COMING BACK TO US 💫#you always give me so much strenght & joy#forever by your side#GFriend#Season of Memories#concert#performance#stage#10th anniversary#magical#beautiful#ggs#girl groups#kpop
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every time i see discourse about fundraisers go by on here im just fully struck with the realization that not a single one of you people have either taken a cybersecurity fraud prevention course or bothered to take one singular second to consider the website youre on. this is the broke bitches website. none of us can afford to fund our mutuals' grocery bills, much less entire evacuation funds, and CERTAINLY not FAKE evacuation funds taking advantage of genocide victims. all this shit abt how people are deliberately choosing not to fund every post that passes their dash because they hate palestinians literally just does the work of actual scammers for them by laying the high-pressure sales tactics groundwork, and the "do you guys have any idea how hard it is to keep coming up with new attention-grabbing fundraiser posts?" ones just ring EXTREMELY hollow because YEAH! YEAH I DO! and so does everyone i follow! and everyone they follow! because all of us are FUCKING BROKE and surviving on crumbs! i just saw one that said "i make sure to keep $40 in my wallet at all times so i can give $20 to any panhandlers i see, this is the same" and its like!! good for you, thats very nice, but like!!! you need need NEED to take a step back and realize that /being able to do that/ is a position of privilege, not the default setting to be a good person. i wont discount that some people do ignore fundraisers specifically because of racism because Of Course, but like. a) yelling at them isnt gonna make them stop, or more accurately yelling at /everyone else/ isnt gonna make those people stop, and b) trying to apply that as a blanket motivation for everyone just. realistically doesnt work. not donating is a nonaction, it is the literal default status, and while in specific situations you can use CONSISTENT absence of SPECIFIC actions to track a person's motivations SOMETIMES, broadly speaking that just. doesnt work.
there are 8 billion people on this planet. most of them will never know you exist. of the ones that do, most will not be able to help you. of the ones that can, most will not be on the broke bitches website passing the same communal $20 around. consider your audience and stop shitting on fellow poor people for having the gall to need to be careful with their money. and if you are genuinely only posting your fundraiser to tumblr, like. im sorry, but you need to anticipate not reaching your goal and prepare accordingly. theres a reason the last big scam scandal people talk about actually getting the money is like. all-or-nothing era, as a website none of us have the funds to make that kind of thing happen anymore or the security to risk it. a fundraiser not meeting its goal on here is not a personal sleight against whoever made it, its just how life goes sometimes. and it's unfair and it sucks and we should help however we can, but. sometimes you just arent able to help someone else, and continuing to feel responsible serves only to torture yourself. and blaming OTHERS serves only to move that guilt from yourself off onto another person. i imagine that has to be where a lot of the vitriol comes from, is people who cant afford to donate more getting pissed at people they see as having the funds but choosing not to share them, but again, sometimes you just are not able to achieve the goals you set out towards, through no fault of the specific parties involved.
people on tumblr choosing to buy groceries rather than potentially donate to a scam are not your enemy and are not the ones facilitating a genocide. we're all victims of the same horrific system, the question is just how that system manifests its influence on each of us. poverty kills just as thoroughly as a bomb. everyone is just doing their best to survive, and as much as we like to pretend that everyone should be a perfect selfless angel that puts others before themselves no matter what, humans are by default a selfish species, and it is a lot easier to say what youd do in theory than actually do it. and there's a reason you have to put on your own oxygen mask before helping the person beside you, youre of no help to anyone if youre too dead to do anything.
#origibberish#and inb4 someone goes 'are you saying poverty is as bad a situation as GENOCIDE' be so fucking fr with me i s2g#yall know thats not what i mean so if we can just skip the part where we pretend you dont and quibble about semantics thatd be great#also ive seen multiple posts being like 'i cant believe yall are saying EVERY FUNDRAISER FROM PALESTINIANS is a scam' which#uh. no one was saying that?#people were saying that. some scammers were using the genocide as their scam? which. is true? there have been? several confirmed?#like. most arguments in this i can see where theyre coming from but that just. literally is inaccurate#i cant even call it disingenuous even though it clearly is because thats just. so far off of what literally anyone was saying that i have#trouble interpreting it as anything other than a deliberate exaggeration to stir emotional responses.#like. ive said before i see little value in going 'zomg a psyop!!' but that more than anything made me be like#if there was anyone on this website i had to pick to be running a scam using palestine as a cover it would be that person. because just. how#the fuck do you get that interpretation unless youre deliberately trying to emotionally manipulate people into not using#their critical thinking skills to determine scams from real fundraisers.#oh also the posts being like 'even if some are scams‚ so what? you should still risk it'#like genuinely if you have shared that one i have 0 respect for you. like that just. is not how things work in the real world when you#need money to survive.#and when the stakes are 'help save someone from genocide or help someone taking advantage of genocide victims' like.#you really cant see why people would be a little nervous abt that without it being some deep seated personal hatred?#you cant see why picking the wrong one there might weigh on a person?#just. idk. ppl on here need to get better at trying to see others' perspectives i think
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Hey so do you know where I could find this acting manifesto of yours?
I usually try and avoid publicly expressing my opinion on things like this but I recently saw some people commenting negatively on his acting again and I’m starting to doubt my own judgement.
I’ve truly never had a huge problem with his acting but I keep seeing people using really harsh words to describe his prior and current work. I genuinely think he’s doing a good job in THK but these comments sometimes make me think I’m missing something.
That conflicts with the fact I know at least three people he worked with on THK specifically had positive things to say about his acting too and I trust people who do this for a living to know what they’re talking about for the most part.
I guess I’m just looking for your post to have a more detailed perspective of the opposite viewpoint to “he’s a terrible actor” to help affirm some of my thinking so I’m more confident in my positive opinion of his acting.
Overall though I’m enjoying everyone in this show but for me I’m specifically enjoying the four mains the most. Kudos to them honestly.
(Disclaimer: Obviously everyone is entitled to their opinion but the harshness of some of the opinions took me off guard a little.)
fuck these people. they don't know shit.
(mind you. this manifesto was written based on his performance in just star in my mind and hidden agenda. his 2024 shows weren't even out at that point. in fact, thk hadn't even been publicly announced yet. you can see from the start there is talent in this boy if you actually know what to look out for)
bonus: i rant some more in the last reblog
#''i trust people who do this for a living to know what they're talking about'' <- yeah. exactly#i'm only semi-qualified bc i don't actually do this for a living#(yet. not yet‚ hopefully)#but i do have a diploma in acting#and i had two fantastic teachers who made a point of teaching us students how to analyze acting performances#on my last class with one of these teachers he actually told me i'd make a good director based on the feedback i'd give my peers in class#i'm not saying you need to trust my acting opinions and that they are the only correct™ ones (god no)#but my opinions likely have more legitimacy than those of the majority of fans (and haters)#anon you mind collecting some of the harsh things that are being said? i wanna know if they even come with receipts#asks#anon#airenyah no. 1 dunk defender#dunk natachai#adrm#yeah istg. if i keep hearing (about) people talking shit about dunk's acting#i may write a part two of this manifesto once thk is over and i'm done with my weekly style meta project#also!! sometimes he DOES mess up!! sometimes things don't go that smoothly!!#BUT SO WHAT#it's mostly individual instances#like his monologue in the thk ep8 crying scene#that was the first time in the entire series so far where i was like ''kid this is not your finest moment you can do better than this''#(the build up was wrong‚ he stayed on the same level and acted out mostly the obvious)#(it would have been more interesting if he hadn't gone into the monologue with a whiny voice from the first second on)#(the emotional arc would have been more interesting and the drop down to the crying would have been bigger and more effective)#anyway. he's ACING this role and my style metas are basically a love letter to his acting too#because i wouldn't be able to write 10k(+) words on style every week if the things weren't there in his performance#anyway fuck these people i think most of them have decided to hate dunk from the start or are parroting their friends' words#they'll just hate whatever he does on principle bc they don't actually care#and they don't care to look at his improvement either bc they just hate him on principle#anon don't let their words drag down your enjoyment of dunk's performance!! because i'm telling you there is SO MUCH JOY to be found!!!!!!
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"why are you so worried abt random accidents, stuff like that rarely ever happens" well you see I'm too disabled to ever evacuate a situation on my own, so I'd rather be a safety advocate now than become a statistic later
#like. part of the reason i avoid large crowded events at all costs unless they are outdoors#is because i know for a fact i would more likely be a victim of crowd crush than any disaster like a fire#i am slow. i am very fragile. i have extremely poor balance#even if i could walk on that particular day (which is becoming less and less likely by the month)#i would be knocked over almost immediately by a light shove and be trampled#as well as like. my diminishing ability to make it UP stairs in the event of a fire in my apartment#because i live in a basement apartment and there is no elevator or alternative way upstairs in this building#if i were on an upper floor i would bear the injuries and just throw myself down the stairs if it were that severe of an emergency#i know far too well how to protect myself from a hard fall and would likely be able to avoid too severe an injury there#but if i had to crawl up the stairs i don't know if i could make it#these things are also why i fear car accidents so much#i physically cannot use an airbag without it breaking my collarbone; my height and general brittleness guarantee that#so it's just not. active. on my side of the car. like it was manually disabled#and I'm already so severely disabled i just. i can't emotionally handle something else. on top of everything#i have a do not resuscitate order in place bc of that. so if my heart stops for any reason they shouldn't try to restart it#that's a recent choice bc like. i can already barely handle the emotional toll of my current disabilities getting worse#i would not be able to handle something new unless it were like. a more severe form of one i already handle well like. losing my legs#i miss running but it wasn't as hard to give up as; say; losing use of my hands- they're the only way i can do ANYTHING nowadays#the few times my joint pain got bad enough that i fully lost use of my hands for a few days were absolute torment#and I'm far far too scared of my voice being recorded to use anything with speech to text like. it's a BAD paranoia i can't shake it#so i would just kind of. be locked out from most tech. and THAT is currently the only way it's possible for me to be social#so i would actually just fully lose my mind like it's already fragile enough i would break i would just break#i love large transport vehicles but i struggle to trust the safety of most other than trains because those tend to be. fairly safe#I've watched enough train disaster videos to know how robust the rules and regulations of modern trains are#(all regulations are written in blood!)#i trust cars very little though and since buses run on the same streets i worry. a Lot#not that there's any buses that run near my apartment the closest bus stop is three blocks away and it only comes twice a day#and it only runs to the college and nowhere else so there's. very little point to me using it#and very few ways for me to even access it in my current physical state#it's very much not an accessible bus stop the sidewalks are diagonal in most places and my right wheel is malfunctioning now bc of it
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Uranus and earth being a couple in mythology is indeed pretty funny but have you seen the myth where uranus literally LOST HIS NUTS and that's was what made venus (or in the case aphrodite) come to be? lol
Poor Uranus. No pecans, no macadamias, no filberts... nutless. Nothing. (a sequel of sorts to this ask)
#cw suggestive#i'm not sure what cw to file this under as??#he just can't catch a break HAHAHA#i almost forgot about that part in the myth til you reminded me and omg#greek mythology is WILD#this is the most emotion both of them have ever shown so far so congrats lmaooo#art#asks#anon#anonymous#venus#uranus#heliosphere: under the sky#HUtS yuri
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okay time to catch up on Honkai's story again—




holy fuck
#abbey plays honkai impact#this game never ceases to amaze me#it's so... metal lmao 😭#the amount of k1lling it has#most serious insane and emotional Hoyo game by far#everytime I come back I get reminded about how good the story is#and the characters#because they actually give them time to develop#it's such a slowburn though#like it gets me extremely impatient#there's so many fighting phases#and you know. it's pretty cool when you get to play as an OP character#but the parts where they make you use Kiana and Bronya's first battlesuits are ooooooooooofffff#hell on earth#they feels so clunky and I don't know why we can't just use the most recent ones they got#like we got Kiana's heterochromia one#and the blue one from Bronya (idk the names sorry)#yet the game gives you their first ever battlesuits to get through content#why must I suffer
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Henry VI Parts 2 & 3 (1983) Screencaps and Rambles Extravaganza
because unfortunately for everyone this is how I process my feelings and I have so very many of them right now.
*reverently clutching my blurry hard-won 80s vhs quality screencaps with 3 pixels and a dream between them to my chest* my treasures.... (there's some really good lighting in this, which helps a lot with the quality being quite so. as it is lol)
the change in york's expression before and after clifford shoves and unleashes some macroaggressions on richard is. everything to me. clifford should have just made his peace with his god right then and there probably
my favourite mean girls power couple
cackling at the way edward expertly and gently reels richard back in before he can kill clifford jr. on the spot and the parley with him and subtly hands him over to warwick fhdskja. ultimate fuckboy or no he IS an older brother it cannot be denied
this little instinctive comforting gesture of richard's when edward collapses after hearing their dad is dead, all the brothers together before everything goes to hell............................ the love WAS there once and it makes everything so much worse and so much more painful and fucked up and awful down the line
power couple part 2. any excuse to fall to your knees in devotion before your rightful king etc. I suppose, he does it at least three times fjskfhas. also the fact that warwick is so tall that he still reaches york to like the shoulder from down there fhdskja
putting the rest under a readmore to save people's dashes and perhaps some of what little remains of my dignity
bear with me here this'll take some explanation but I just. the way richard is placed in frame while york is alive
(you don't even need the 'richard hath best deserved of all my sons' line in this one, the cinematography lets you know he's so clearly their father's favourite all on its own haha, whenever they're on screen together he's pretty much always the closest to him out of the brothers or aligned with him in the image somehow. safe under his wing, as it were.)
vs. how richard appears in frame after york is dead
(special shoutout to this one. you may spot all one pixel of him tucked between warwick and edward up in front there lmao)
he puts his hand on his sword the moment warwick mentions their father's death and keeps it there. if you even care.
literally pushed into the background or the fringes, operating on his own far more than as part of the group when he does come forward, starting to come adrift both by his own choice and from how the others start to move around him like he isn't there, and increasingly isolated either way. the humble beginnings of something that's going to turn into something very very ugly one day. cinnamonatography or whatever (I say with a hollow attempt at ironic distance as if I'm not so painfully earnest about this I can barely breathe.)
which also plays into how effectively it's shown visually that the strength of the yorkist faction, the moments when they're most dangerous and powerful, is when they're acting in unity, which happens at times even after york is gone -- without him the center cannot hold, but even around the corpse of such a star leftover gravity sticks around for a while:
these motherfuckers are pack hunters jesus christ. (fortunately for everyone else they are also messy backstabbing bitches who'll destroy themselves and each other unaided without a tender fatherly hand to keep them from trying to murder each other for their turn to play on the x-box, otherwise they'd be invincible lmao. warwick's sole mistake was to not take york literally when he told him that you cannot turn your back on those boys for five fucking minutes. send someone else to france warwick you need to be ready to hold these kids back by the scruff at a second's notice. oh no he's too tall he can't hear us from down here WARWICK -- )
richard is the only one to keep his full armour on for all of the first half of the play, even after the fighting is over for now. in case you were wondering :) (love george's slutty little armour vest look going on here tho I must say. it makes no sense but neither does any of the costume design in this one so that's fine don't worry about it (okay! yay!))
owie owie owie owie this scene just won't let me go I keep thinking about it every moment of the day. it's like a wound in my heart that never heals.
anyway if I have to suffer the mortifying ordeal of finding myself a wholehearted yorkist for the duration of the ESH AITA reddit thread twice retold chapter of english history that is this adaptation of shakespeare's henry vi plays, I may as well shitpost about it to compound my humiliation and give vent to my Emotions. when york died in this I literally went 'NOOO give him back!!! :'(' out loud and that's probably partly down to me being pathetic but it's also just a really really good take on the play and Art is so good and important actually thank you and goodnight
#is this going to be for literally anyone but me? probably not. but who will be there for me if not me#that is my fandom battle cry and always will be. if under no other banner then my own. extremely myself for better or worse#henry vi part 3#henry vi part 2#shakespeare#henry vi 1983#richard iii#I think what I appreciate most about this version (and there's a lot I appreciate!) is how much emotional *sense* it makes#there's clearly been so much thought put into everyone's relationships with each other and there are small moments everywhere#to bring them out. how and when people touch or don't touch how they arrange themselves on the screen/stage#it all feels so *coherent* and packed with interpersonal information and it delivers it so effortlessly and naturally#long post#also the best henry I've personally seen by far he's SO. he's so endearing and so useless but he realizes he's useless#in such a heartbreaking way
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#The Atypical Family#I haven’t enjoyed/ been so moved by a drama in a very long time ❤️#just finished it I cried so much & SO hard haha#I was completely immersed and engaged from beginning to end which is rare (12 eps is a good length too)#I didn’t expect it to have so much depth and be so touching going into it I just wanted something different#mental illnesses complex interesting characters complicated -toxic- family relationships fantasy fated lovers found family...#well written and WONDERFULLY acted!!#the whole cast was amazing but the two leads were just outstanding wow#never saw either of them in big roles and now I’m a huge fan of both#Chun Woo Hee I’m so in love with you#I’m usually more touched by the female lead (actress/character) but the male lead actor was acting his ass off and made me SOB many times#his scenes with his daughter Ina oh I was a MESS and of course the lead couple scenes together <3#I also haven’t been that impressed by romance lately in shows but theirs was truly beautiful (and again: really well acted)#I could relate to parts of most characters: Dahae Donghee Gwiju Ina..#a poetic emotional rollercoaster and my favorite drama this year so far (by far)#now I want to carry on watching Queen of Tears (mainly for my Queen Kim Jiwon I’m her number one fan) and watch Lovely Runner too#but it will be hard to beat this one and I highly recommend it!!#deserved more love & attention#my mom loved it too it standed out to her and she watches ALL the kdramas lol#forgot to mention the magical OST I see you by the oh so great Lee Sora and her bewitching voice <3#I also haven’t been so moved by an ost in a long time it added so much to the atmosphere of the drama & really transported me into its worl#korean drama#2024#shots#cinematography#jang ki yong#cheon wo hee#Claudia Kim#park soyi
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After Kirk decided to retire from Starfleet a few years before TWOK, I wonder what it was that brought him back just to teach at the Academy, especially since he found it so miserable.
Was he brought back for some mission and then he just accepted the teaching position because it, at that moment, felt like being closer to the real thing? And after all, he did enjoy being an instructor in his youth (but I believe that was a mandatory period for those in the command path)
#this period will always be very !!! to me#and i think about it a lot#(a mckirk version where they buy a farm is also never too far from my thoughts)#or maybe not a farm. just a house but a horse farm is close and kirk learns how to ride#and they have two dogs#i also can't decide if mccoy during twok was a part of the teaching stuff at the academy or if he did the inspection as a favour to kirk#because kirk can't go anywhere without his emotional support doctor lol#will always love how mccoy followed kirk everywhere in twok#tos nonsense#jim kirk#fyi i am not interested in whatever the novels have to say about this period. most of them were written before generations so...
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bonus thing i cherish in this shot is that it's the one time it's immediately noticeable that her hair length is uneven....let's go Cutting One's Own Hair (With Or Without A Mirror) look havers irl (b/c of cutting one's own hair with or without a mirror, maybe) & even when it's recreated on purpose like so
#haven't yet rewatched fury road as i've been anticipating doing for weeks now. we're on the verge of it though i can sense it#thank god ms charlize (juking diacritics) decided on Furiosa Will Have Short Hair#the No Diegetic Makeup. the constant (smudged with dirt or grease or blood perhaps) looks#only additional thing that we're demanding from anything. armpit hair please. for furiosa at least#meanwhile siiigh i guess like three days (? i will go through the number of Nights in my head. one. two.) closer to two days#isn't long enough to grow that much leg hair siiigh fine. more difficult to match up leg hair shots chronology too but if only....#reminds me how a while ago i was like half watching smthing & after a fair number of scenes was like oh hang on that's charlize furiosa....#b/c i basically know her From This. i'd seen smthing else she was in years before w/o remembering much details of Anything#(also had technically seen tom hardy in smthing more recently at the time Also w/o recognizing as much. also thanks at least in part to#not especially enjoying the movie) & i'm not great with faces; that most roles are gonna have Longer Hair / Makeup happening#and a lack of constant dirt grease blood etc even like okay this would be quite difficult#so i Didn't recognize the actor for a hot minute until the reason i Did was just this instance of [subtle quiet shift Acting Moment]#where she got this particular Silent Restrained Intensity going and i was like oh hang on. Could Be Her lmao. it was#anyways even capturing this screencap it was like Aughhh that she Walks. Stops. Walks. the Soundtrack doing what it's doing here....#and if there's Anything in this film to illustrate [max: main character] [furiosa: protagonist] boy is it this scene. wah#the end of this shot as capable like starts looking away like ah yeah emotion moment. well i'll give you this privacy#just like the fast & furious crossroads chat about cam fr lol like i'll respectfully turn so i'm not looking right at you for this Real Shi#responding to your reeling deepest devastation by moving forward still as far as you can? a quarter mile at a time of you#fury road
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#ok so reflection time#i’ll be honest i didn’t listen to fitf right away bc i had just gotten out of treatment and i was scared to listen to ANY new music that#might trigger any sad emotions and send me spiralling lmao but !#this time last year i was just starting to settle into myself#i went on a great first date and to my first mosh pit (even tho it was an indie band?)#and even tho i don’t rly talk to the person i went on the date w anymore that night will always be so special to me#i went w my bestie too and it was just such a stark reminder of the beauty in life#and when i did finally listen to fitf#it honestly changed me#i was so overwhelmed w pride for louis#like he’s come so far and the music he’s making is not only amazing subjectively#but feels so authentic to him (as much as i can tell that from not knowing him personally anyway)#and like genuinely i never could have guessed how great this album would be if you’d asked me to guess what his solo music would be like#when 1d ended and just#so so grateful for this album and the people it’s brought me closer to#hearing most of it live was insane and amazing and i’ll never forget it ever ever ever#thank u louis for making music ur way and blessing us all w it#the community at large is obviously not perfect but there are some parts of it that just take my breath away#the sense of belonging i felt at his show#unparalleled#he has a way of making ppl feel safe enough to just be themselves#and i admire that so much#when i think about the kind of person i wanna be that’s the first quality that comes to mind#so so grateful rn#ty universe ily#rowyn rambles
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The analysis is queued up for tomorrow morning! And ohhhh my god I had such an epiphany writing this one. Like I think I might’ve figured out the why behind the Upside Down time fuckery (not sure about the how, but ah well, I’ll save that for the sciencey people on here!)
#well. at least one possible why lmao#but it makes the most sense to me so far#so there’s that#I’m so excited to see what people think about the time stuff#because this has been churning in my head for a week and now I need to know what other people think#calling it emotionsgate#because a big part of the theory is about emotions#and the gates thing is funny to me#also useful for tagging tbh#emotionsgate#byler#<- target audience
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being consumed by the madness [has been figuring out plot shit for like three hours now]
#i could go for longer but i. need to go to bed#the early chunk of p3 is Finally starting to coagulate into something coherent and not just loose scenes#so i like. finally feel like i have a substantial foundation to build off of#part of me is already worrying about pacing and i'm trying to chill out like okay...let's get it actually written first and not#just bullet pointed. but ohhh i am excited to Know Things now#one of the gratifying things about having been writing/plotting things out more consistently is recognizing when i run into these sort of..#idk knots? tangles? and then being able to tease out what's not working or conflicting#not always successfully but enough to bookmark for later when i have other Revelations#welcome to the beginning of p3 we (currently) have: breaking and entering. pursuit by outlaws. body horror (angst). body horror (horny).#nervous gunpoint robbery. semi-accidental murder. and another horse. 👍#there's more to the shitshow but i'm already embarrassing myself hgkldfhg#as much as i'm embarassed to show my writing i feel like the emotional execution of things is at least decent enough to get the impact of#said scene on the characters across far better than summing things up like that. if that even makes sense#something something the fine line between not taking yourself too seriously but not undermining your work idk#i need to figure out yarrow's horse more though. i'm so amused by that creature being the most normal possible thing out of that entire#group. like the beloved boring coworker amongst clowns. guy who doesn't know what's going on at all#rambles
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reacting SO badly to the last third of HnK is really funny to me in retrospect because of how much it endeared me to the series in general. that shit pulled a homestuck, if it was uncomplicatedly good i’d probably not be as invested in it still
#my favorite character being the one whose story upsets me most (& not even in like. a deliberate or goodly-intentional way?)? CLASSIC ICONIC#cairngorm sweety darling baby i’m so sorry for what they DID to you but at the same time. good gravy i feel like thats lightning in a fuckin#bottle when it comes to disagreeable writing choices - that still make enough in-character sense to be REALLY icksome#like if it was just completely left field it’d. end up feeling like a nonsequiter but cairn WAS always tied to themes of freedom and codepe#codependency even without the plot twists (& the shifting gendered aesthetics is a theme common to basically the entire series#tying in more broadly with the shifting nature of identity and self-image in general)#…that said just because it ostensibly makes SENSE doesn’t mean its. TONALLY appropriate to itself but that was a ball dropped in general wrt#the moon stuff#like. i do not feel like the cognitive dissonance of finding indipendence through a whirlwind romance with Personified Captivity Domination#& Both Soft & Hard Power was deliberate or if it WAS the story did not do a sufficient job in actuallizing that cognitive dissonance into#any sort of positive meaning#it was A Bad Thing For The Narrative To Be Doing#also grumble grumble ‘insecure-because-she-cant-go-on-E-yet-thus-denying-herself-the-one-way-to-‘prove’-shes-a-woman transfem butch is#is extremely mixed emotions on the way one of the more masc gems gets feminized’ lol#(while it also appealing to the part of myself that really wants to dress another smaller prettier myself up in frilly outfits and carry her#around in a purs-MESSENGER BAG!! lol)#(its honestly not that far off from a ‘this feels lazer targeted at my ambivalences specifically’ moment rofl)#aecomphetmea#thats nothing nvm#I. REALLY REALLY R E A L L Y NEED TO REWATCH UTENA
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