#more for self-amusement than anything
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liskantope · 1 year ago
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Public intellectual Robert Wright, who runs the Nonzero YouTube channel (once known as Bloggingheads), just a week ago finally had the last of his weekly political discussions with his conversation partner Mickey Kaus on the channel since around the end of 2005. I've been a regular listener for the past few years (only a small fraction of their total run though, and I've never been a subscriber and so haven't seen their after-conversations in what they call the Parrot Room). Although I've always found their dynamic to be a bit cold and caustic compared to that of other pairs of conversation partners that began through Bloggingheads (Bill Scher and Matt Lewis, Glenn Loury and John McWhorter, Kat Rosenfield and Phoebe Maltz-Bovy), and that Wright in particular is unpleasantly prickly towards Kaus, I'm going to miss the sound of their voices in their weekly back-and-forths.
Here is a bit of what I humorously imagined to be their final episode (which in real life turned out to be as dry as usual and not so much of a "goodbye episode").
[Videos turn on in split screen.]
ROBERT WRIGHT: Hi, Mickey!
MICKEY KAUS: Hey Bob!
RW: How're you doing, Mickey?
MK: I'm doing fine, Bob! [holds a photo up to the camera, which shows a split-screen image of two dark-haired middle-aged men each with a microphone in front of him; the man on the right is mostly bald] I have a quiz for you, Bob. Can you guess the identities of these two men in the photo?
RW: [squinting with perhaps a feigned intensity] Let's see... is it Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David, back thirty years ago?
MK: It's not them, Bob! But you're right that it's from many years ago.
RW: Are these guys more the political type?
MK: You could say that, Bob.
RW: Is it... is the one on the left George W. Bush during his administration and the one on the right Karl Rove?
MK: Closer, Bob! But they're not actual politicians. And they're not neocons.
RW: Oh, I see. So if they weren't neocons, is it possible that one of them happen to vote for Trump twice?
MK: I'll give you a hint, Bob: this photo is to commemorate the end of an era that has arrived this week.
RW: Wait a minute... [mock moment of realization] Is that us, Mickey?
MK: It's us, Bob! From almost 18 years ago, when we started having conversations on your channel.
RW: But... but how can those guys possibly be me and you? Look at those baby faces, and such dark hair...
MK: It's called aging, Bob! I'd say you should try it sometime, except, well, judging from the photo and your face as it appears now, it, uh, it looks like you have. [awkward grin at having successfully reached a spontaneous punchline of sorts]
RW: [unperturbed] Yeah, you got me there, Mickey. You know who else has tried aging? I'll give you a hint: he has a little more power and influence than you or I do, Mickey. And I've been harping on him for a while.
MK: Elon Musk isn't getting that old.
RW: [visible exasperation] I'm talking about Joe Biden, Mickey! I noted three more moments of the past week that highlight his senility, which I'd be happy to describe to you, but since this is our final episode, I'd rather just take my last opportunity to ask, is it still not too late to get him off the Democratic ticket?
MK: Since last week I've developed a new theory about that, Bob, about a plan that possibly could work for getting him to step down, one that I don't think anyone else has considered, Bob. It involves coercing him to take a seat on the Supreme Court, after removing one of the current justices by invoking a constitutional clause that hasn't been recognized since eighteen--
RW: Let me stop you right there, Mickey: does this idea of yours end with Kamala Harris taking his place?
MK: [a bit sheepishly] Uh, yeah.
RW: Because I may not have made myself clear the last dozen weeks I've brought this up, but my one condition to go with Biden not running for reelection is that I don't want Kamala Harris on the ticket either. Geez, is that too much to ask?
MK: Well then I don't think I can help you, Bob. But I'm sure I can come up with some other clever idea in time for next week's conversation.
RW: There isn't going to be an episode next week, Mickey! Today was our last chance to get Biden and Harris out of the race!
MK: Well, there are enough problems right now where Biden is concerned. Something really came to a head for him this week, and it vindicates me on something I've been railing against for quite some time. One of my favorite topics, actually.
RW: Could it possibly be the Child Tax Credit, Mickey?
MK: No, it's not the Child Tax Credit. Why would anything that happened with the Biden administration this past week have anything to do with the Child Tax Credit? Although I'm happy to discuss that as much as you like, even though it's not on our planned list of topics, Bob. I thought of half a dozen more points I wanted to make right after the last time you actually let me talk about it, which I --
RW: I can't even remember the when the last time was...
MK: Exactly my point, Bob! And yet, from back whenever that was, I do still remember just a few more arguments I wanted to make --
RW: [hastily interrupting him] Wait, don't you have another favorite topic, Mickey? Oh yeah: the influx of undocumented immigrants?
MK: [eagerly, with a smile] You got it, Bob! Undocumented immigrants and how they're driving down wages of decent working Americans!
RW: [with obvious sarcasm] Oh right, I had almost forgotten what your views on that were! That's right, now it makes sense again, that's why you voted for Trump twice, never mind him being a visible menace to our democracy...
MK: Right, uh, well, uh, it looks like Biden is going to be forced to take up Trump's policies on the immigration issue, due to the unprecedented influx of illegal immigrants into big cities full of his voting base. Guess who's talking about building a wall now?
RW: Well I potentially have a lot of strong counterarguments to make to the thesis that I know you're driving at, Mickey, but I don't think our listeners really want to be treated to the dry conversation that would ensue. The important point is, you voted for Trump twice, even though he's a threat to our democracy; let that be put into the record.
Now, I say one of us comes up with some sort of segue to the war in Ukraine.
[awkward silence]
MK: Well, it's not my job to get us onto the war in Ukraine, Bob.
RW: Shall I just dive into it then? I can talk for the next twenty minutes about something going on in the Donbas, and in Kyiv, and name several other places, and bring up the ground hardening for the winter, and how Russia can replace its troops much more easily than Ukraine can, and how Biden should be urging Zelensky to pursue peace talks, and so on, provided you're willing to nod along and interject with an empty comment or two to keep the conversation flowing. Are you feeling up for that?
MK: Sure, Bob! It's always relaxing, listening to you talk about Ukraine and nodding my head and jumping in with occasional comments and questions without really having to know what we're talking about. But do our listeners really want twenty minutes of that on our last episode ever?
[continuing with sincerity] We could have a very engaging conversation instead about the unacceptable shortcomings of the Child Tax Credit. I think I already suggested that actually, and mentioned that I came up with several more shortcomings.
RW: [gazing at the ceiling] Please, let's end on anything but the Child Tax Credit. Anything, Mickey.
MK: How about amnesty bills for illegal immigrants, then?
RW: Okay, you know what? That's the alarm, to remind us to wrap it up. [No alarm is heard, but he is glancing over at a supposed object sitting just off-screen.]
MK: You set it to go off awfully soon, Bob.
RW: Yeah well, I'd forgotten that I wanted to make this last episode short and sweet. It's our final Parrot Room afterwards that the subscribers are really excited about, after all.
MK: Do you know what I think, Bob? I think you decided on the spot to pretend that the alarm went off, because you didn't like the way the conversation was going. Do you know what I just employed there? Your favorite skill, cognitive empathy, Bob!
RW: That's not really what cognitive empathy is about, Mickey. Or the type of thing it should be applied to. But I understand, even if I don't approve, of where you're coming from here: you hear me bringing up the importance of cognitive empathy from time to time, and you couldn't pass up a potential opportunity to show me that you understand and care about the concept too, especially if it helps deflect from the fact that you voted for Trump in both his elections. And this is a natural tendency that you and others have and I should learn to expect in the future. See what I just did there, Mickey?
MK: [with half a grin] Right. Well. Do you have your list of Parrot Room topics, Bob? I have mine. [picks up half a novel's worth of sheets of handwritten notes and starts riffling through it]
RW: Yeah, well I have both of mine up here. [points to head] Want to give a run-down of everything you got?
MK: If we go through all of these, we'll have spent more than half of this conversation on what we're going to cover in the Parrot Room, Bob.
RW: Oh, well I suppose that's right. At least, given how much detail you put into describing your topics, so that I always have to stop you from completely spoiling your takes on them right away and thus rendering the Parrot Room superfluous.
MK: It doesn't matter, Bob! It's too late for newcomers to subscribe anyway, and it's our very last Parrot Room so our current subscribers are excited about it regardless!
RW: Now once again I want to make sure listeners are clear on the fact that this YouTube channel will remain as active as ever, and I'll still be having conversations every Friday night, just with other people who are not Mickey. Because Mickey here had to attend to other projects of his, projects that are so important. Which is perfectly all right.
MK: [with a loyal, slightly strained grin] That's right, he'll be talking to much more worthwhile conversation partners than me.
RW: [matter-of-factly] Exactly, my Friday podcast guests are going to be much better than Bob here. And hardly any of them will have voted for Trump even once... [holding up a solemn index finger towards the camera]... that's how high-quality my future Friday guests will be. Anyway, I don't think our listeners really want to hear us discuss actual issues in the Parrot Room this last time, Mickey, any more than they wanted to hear us discuss actual issues in our final episode.
MK: That's right, Bob, they just wanted to hear us spar and jab at each other. And I think we delivered, Bob!
RW: I think I delivered on this, Mickey, and you... Well, I suppose you delivered on this about to the extent that you usually do.
MK: [the strained grin momentarily returns] And there's another blow! Well, I guess it's time to head to the Parrot Room, where what the subscribers really want to hear is our reminiscences about the last 18 years, and how much we'll miss talking to each other.
RW: [very dryly] Oh I'll miss talking to you, Mickey. I might actually cry in the Parrot Room. Tears may be shed. I may, in fact, weep.
MK: I actually had a point I wanted to make, a take on one of your superficial attributes I'll miss the most from our conversations, Bob: the uniquely whiny, nasally quality of your voice.
RW: Didn't we already discuss this, Mickey? I thought we came to the conclusion that, although it had been agreed upon by scientists that my voice is the most whiny and nasally among all human voices, a certain presidential candidate --
MK: They did a further study, Bob, with an audio analysis, and showed that the previous conclusion was correct after all, that even Ron DeSantis' nasally voice is no match --
RW: [hastily interrupting] There you go again, giving away Parrot Room material to those who haven't paid for it! Anyway, I'm sure that all of this is motivated by your desire to take superlatives away from DeSantis, since he's running against your superlative bestie, Donald Trump.
MK: Since when is Trump my bestie, Bob?
RW: Perhaps our listeners are unaware, but you voted for him both in 2016 and in 2020, Mickey...
MK: That's right, but, uh, our listeners may not realize that it's not as though I actually ever liked Trump, I was mainly concerned about Congress not being able to pass an amnesty bill...
RW: ...even after Trump refused to promise that he would accept election results...
MK: ...and actually, uh, the thing is, I was making a calculation based on an average of predictions for the number of House and Senate seats the Republicans would take, and if I'd known that Republicans would gain so many House seats, there's actually a chance, uh, Bob, that I may have voted for, I dunno, someone else! [a little feverishly] It's the Amnesty Bill, Bob, the Amnesty Bill would be the very undoing of our country, and sometimes you have to choose between the lesser of two --
RW: [ignoring MK] Okay everyone, we're heading to the Parrot Room for some very intriguing and exclusive content, as always. Something much more interesting than Mickey's opinions on amnesty. Patreon-dot-com-slash-parrotroom.
MK: [taking out his toy parrot and speaking into its microphone] Down with the Child Tax Credit and with amnesty! Forever and ever!
PARROT: [in a high-pitched rendering of MK's voice, flapping its wings] Down with the Child Tax Credit and with amnesty! Forever and ever!
RW: See you in the Parrot Room!
[The screens flicker and blip off, for the very last time.]
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gwydionae · 2 months ago
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I get using no specific iteration of the TMNT in a crossover and just making yet another new version. After all, the franchise has had many, many different versions at this point, so it's easy to accept that this is simply one more to add to the pile.
But Naruto has... one. Just the one. So when all of a sudden characters are written/shown to have expertise that they shouldn't have at the age they're being depicted, it just ends up feeling weird.
I get that fitting things into the Naruto timeline can be a chore. Do it too early, and Sakura is kinda useless. Do it too late, and Sasuke's off murdering people. And if you try to set it after the series, the power levels are seriously gonna be out of whack.
But breaking the only canon that has ever existed for these characters makes them feel like... not the same characters. I might be the only one who cares about this, but it really took me out of the story, to the point where I couldn't help but focus on it. I don't want to be distracted from page one of a silly ninja crossover comic.
#almost as distracting as the weird dialogue given to all the naruto characters i mean wut lol#unsurprisingly i didn't care for how the naruto characters were handled#i went into this issue knowing this would most likely be the case#i am admittedly very harsh on how i judge naruto characterizations pre time jump#ah well#who knows maybe in the end the story will be worth it but at just 4 issues i'm not gonna hold my breath#more specific spoilers below...#i feel like they really should have just left sakura her normal self#if you know her character well enough you could totally pull off a fight between her and raph#he is a brawler and very straightforward but sakura is smart and has excellent chakra control#honestly just use her zaku fight tactics - substitution until you can get a surprise attack#or have her tree climb to get away and attack from range using paper bombs#i'd say she could use clones as a distraction but obviously that's too close to naruto's thing#like you can still make a fight with her work it's not like any of the tmnt were using anything other than taijutsu#but we've already seen covers with naruto using rasengan so i'm guessing she won't be the only one with extra powers#(i know the anime stuck some filler eps in between sasuke waking from his itachi induced coma and his fight with naruto on the roof)#(but those are non-canon and frankly really ruin the flow so i've always hated that they existed even if the kakashi mask one is amusing)#(but if you go by the anime's canon i guess you could technically have naruto knowing rasengan if this story is set then)#also uh sasuke you know you have the sharingan right#why weren't you using it you basically always use it post chuunin exams#though admittedly what the two tomoe sharingan is capable of isn't always clear as sometimes he can see attacks coming#(avoiding gaara's sand ball spikes or seeing haku's fast movement)#and sometimes he can't (like kyuubi naruto at the valley of the end until he gets his third tomoe)#ANYWAY i just really wanted to rant a bit about this thing so uh yeah i ranted XD#not tagging but i suppose it might still come up in searches... ehhhhhh i'll delete the post if i start getting hate or something lol
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swordmaid · 5 months ago
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did an ending of ascended astarion w vengeance shri’iia and I really do want to do a run for this esp with shri’iia bc the regression arc would be so fun to explore I think…! anyway I made her side with the emperor because she has no reason to free orpheus when she’s not in pursuit of her own free will anymore (and others to an extent) and it’s so interesting to me how she’s back to projecting a certain image of herself since she rejected that path of being her most genuine self and returned to how she was before. the comfort of familiarity turning into something so rotten and vile as the centuries pass bc she is forever going to be this static woman! quite literal a ghost of herself since she’s undead now and since - she’s back to disregarding her own self in pursuit of power - she’s given her body up to harleep too so now she doesn’t even belong to herself because her body is harleep’s and’s bound to astarion as creator/spawn. but her oath is reforged again, so her soul feels complete which is the only thing that matters to her - or so she thinks but in this scenario she saw what she could have had, and she’s aware that she can exist outside of her oath but she still clings on it … like that kind <- of conflict within the self so interesting to think about in this scenario bc would that turn to bitterness….or resentment….since the only reason why she’d decide to reclaim her oath again and devote herself to another person (astarion) is to have that sense of familiarity and comfort after being abandoned by ur own goddess and home. like it’s the easy way out definitely but what then?
anyway also so ! funny 👀 and interesting to me bc the high hall hag romance kiss variation was the one where he slaps her on the face and I’m just like ur really slapping her infront all these people!!!!!! and that is so canon to me now I think that’s the start of the Resentment. but then they’ll have their honeymoon phase which lasts for a handful of centuries but as opposed to good end hag romance who becomes this sort of wandering adventurers who travels the world together, bad end hags stay in baldur’s gate taking advantage of the city’s broken state to build astarion’s empire (which will be 👀! relevant much much much much later when shri’iia gone girls him) and they’re making themselves known to the patriars, establishing links and favours, all the saucy political intrigues that shri’iia was familiar with and similar to last time - she’s not a player in the game, only a pawn (and a pretty pawn that can be seen this time!). also like the idea that maybe in the first few centuries shri’iia asks if they can explore the world together bc there’s still a lot she hasn’t seen, and he’s like ok 👍 but never does it, and if she insists, he would tell her he’s too busy or distract her to make her stop asking or tell her straight up that she’s Pestering him which makes the resentment take root hehe. and it’s gonna be this vile rotting thing that’s slowly growing between them and it blooms when he decides to get a new beau because he’s so very bored of her sour face. all of my bad end hag romance hcs are like the opposite of the good end where they stick together bc they want to and they get closer bc they’re being the most genuine versions of themselves and not putting up a facade…!
#but I do like this end for her bc it js so plausible#like change is just so hard and scary..! and returning back to how she was is the easiest thing to do esp now she has someone new to devote#herself to. he becomes this lifeline for her after she is rejected by lolth and now she has all this devotion#she needs to pour on someone so why not him?#also my hc that oath breaker shri’iia is significantly weaker than her w her oath reclaimed#bc her own resolve is faltering. so in this scenario where she reclaims her oath she’s back to being powerful again#which is rlly in line of how she disregards her own self for power / or to get the advantage#the emperor alliance is so inchresting to me#too… I think I want to elaborate more on that bc I think it’ll so happen…! and I like the idea that bc she’s now a spawn#he teaches her how to hunt more efficiently. and she decapitates people like a mindflayer after she’s done w them#like in menzo she used to go for the ankles to stop whoever she’s chasing from running away but now she’s decapitating them which is a nice#upgrade lol. but maybe she goes for the ankles first then the neck when they’re fairly weakened. she’s like some shark lol#and ofc spawn shri’iia is a really big glutton bc she is never satisfied w anything ever and she kills a lot of people at a time#to sate her hunger. which was amusing to astarion at first but now becomes a glaring problem when ur trying to establish ur name amongst#the lords and the patriars but suddenly all their workers are dying bc someone’s been draining them dry and chopping their heads off#shut up about bg3.#bg3 spoilers
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nereidprinc3ss · 9 months ago
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in the dead of night
in which spencer wakes up in the middle of the night with an overwhelming desire to feel you
18+ (smut) warnings/tags: fem!reader, soft dom!spence (certified nereidprinc3ss classic), sub reader, fingering, piv sex, praise, overstimulation, cr**mp*e (god pls we need a new term) a/n: this is probably THEE most self-indulgent thing i've ever written. but.... lowkey favorite smut i've posted thus far..... i'm such a sucker for disgustingly sleepy needy sex. just.... read it and u will see.... and as usual i love you!!! PLEASE tell me what you think!! MWAH
When Spencer got home around one in the morning, he’d been too dead on his feet to do anything more than get undressed, fall into bed, pull you close, and pass out. Now he’s slightly disoriented as he stirs, pinned between sleep and wakefulness as he realizes how you’ve curled into his side—your face is buried in his shoulder to the point where he’s concerned about your access to air—but each warm puff against his neck assures him you’re breathing alright. One arm is slung haphazardly over his shoulder and your top leg is wound around his. Without thinking, his hand cups the back of your thigh, stroking the bare skin where it presses against his hip. You’re never so soft as you are in sleep; plush, easy, gentle. Spencer realizes with some degree of frustration that he has to fuck you. That’s why he’s awake, and he condemned himself to the fate of it as soon as he touched you. 
Sometimes the impracticality of sex becomes so apparent he resents his own mammalian, biological drive to reproduce. It was never like this before he met you. You reduce him to nothing more than a primate doomed to follow its basest instincts. You make him feel stupid. 
God, he loves you. 
It’s with this in mind he drops his head to kiss your shoulder—a gentle sort of wake up call, as his hand snakes further around to your inner thigh and he presses his lips to your ear. 
“Baby?” he murmurs, kneading the smooth warmth of your leg. It doesn’t take much to wake you up. He thought after you’d been staying at his apartment on a semi-regular basis you’d begin to sleep through him getting up and coming home at odd hours, but if anything, you became more sensitive to the floor creaking or the mattress dipping. 
“Hm?” 
His fingers brush the fabric of your underwear. Your hips twitch. 
“Is this okay?”
You inhale deeply, readjusting your arms around him and nodding into his chest. 
“I need yes or no, angel.”
“Yes, please.”
The words aren’t desperate. They’re sleepy, mumbled, maybe even a little annoyed that he’s making you jump through hoops. The corner of his mouth twists in amusement at your perfunctory politeness and the way it poorly disguises your habitual impatience. 
“Thank you,” he says, rewarding you with his fingers pushing between your folds through the fabric. You say nothing more as he unhurriedly rubs your clothed clit, but he feels the way your breath catches for a moment—before pouring out in one deep tide. He presses slightly harder, transitioning from passes to slow, tight circles that elicit the tiniest, sleepiest moans. This goes on for a while until your hips begin grinding in isolated circles, chasing his hand. 
“Touch it,” you beg quietly. He can feel how damp you are through the fabric and realizes he was probably torturing you for several minutes, but sometimes he just gets so lost in touching you it becomes almost meditative. He pulls his hand away and snakes it between your bodies, sliding beneath your underwear and dragging his fingers over your puffy clit. You whimper but he quickly gets distracted when he realizes just how wet you actually are. Spencer sinks his fingers into you and moans lowly at the sound, rubbing at a spot deep inside you and rutting his palm against your clit rather than pumping his fingers. 
“Breathe,” he reminds you when he realizes how still and silent you’ve gone. A small amount of air escapes in a tremulous little cry as your hips roll gently against his hand—whether to escape the sensation or get closer is unclear. “You’re all wet, baby. Were you touching yourself before I got home?”
“Mhm,” you hum weakly against him. “Couldn’t come.”
Spencer feels like he could finish at the thought alone—the nightly phone calls while he’s away occasionally devolve into desperate phone sex and he’s gotten off to the image of you playing with yourself in his bed on more than one occasion. 
“We’ll make you come,” he promises, dragging his fingers from your soaked heat with bated breath. 
He pushes your underwear down first, until you can kick it off your feet (you’ll have to search for it between tangled sheets tomorrow) and then his own, inhaling sharply through clenched teeth as his cock brushes your tummy. Spencer hoists your bent leg further up his body, exposing your cunt a little more and reaching underneath your thigh until he can guide himself between them. 
The head of his cock pushes between your folds momentarily before he’s teasing your swollen clit, slipping the underside of his tip over it in lazy, noisy circles until you whine. 
“Stop it,” you beg, voice still strained with sleep, “need it inside.”
“You’re right, baby, I’m sorry,” he croons, pressing his lips to your hair as he notches his cock at your dripping entrance and slowly begins to push in. “You’re being very patient—”
He cuts himself off as the two of you moan in filthy harmony. You’re so worked up for him, so defenseless in your half-unconscious state that he slips in with far less resistance than usual. 
“Fuck, me,” he groans under his breath, hissing and bucking his hips when you tighten around him and cry out. He shuts his eyes and thinks of the Goncharov conjecture in an attempt to control himself; the i-th cohomology of the complex is isomorphic to the motivic cohomology group—and then he’s fine. He’s at least learned to stop rattling off mathematical paradoxes out loud during sex. “You okay?”
The only answer you have for him is an indecipherable whine that makes his chest ache. He rubs your thigh in sweet, soothing passes. 
“I know, I’m sorry.” A thought occurs—he chuckles breathily, seeing stars as you throb around him. “You never let me in that easily.”
“Mm,” you squeak, gripping his shoulder hard enough that it aches and he truly couldn’t care less, “you feel good.”
He exhales shakily, pulling out slightly before grinding his hips even deeper into yours. 
“Yeah? So do you, sweet girl.”
“Fuck,” you whimper, and he takes it as a sign that you’re ready to be fucked. Spencer’s not thinking about a whole lot as he withdraws all the way and you clench around him desperately—but somewhere in the back of his mind he’s realizing how much he loves your dirty mouth. When he was younger and dumber, he thought he’d prefer a girl who was soft-spoken and rarely (if ever) cursed. Now that he’s had you, he realizes how compelling and endearing the contrast of your soft voice is when you’re swearing like a marine. 
“God, I missed you,” he breathes into your hair as he leisurely finds the right pace and you melt against him. “I missed how soft and wet you get for me,” Spencer admits gently, eyes screwed shut as he rambles from a place of profound affection and not at all thinking clearly, “and I missed how you cry when you need it so bad it hurts, and I missed how sweet you are when you let me fuck you right after I get home and you’re so tired, just like this. You’re always so good, honey, I don’t know what I did to deserve you—” You whine and clench so hard around him it becomes an effort to push back in, and he groans as he realizes you’re already coming. “Good girl, baby. Holy fuck.”
That last part is more so whispered to himself, but he can’t help it as he feels you painting his cock with your release. You’ve never come this quickly before, and he slips his arm beneath the crook of your knee, pulling up and granting himself more access to fuck you harder and faster. You moan brokenly, sinking your nails into his back. 
“‘m sorry. That was—I didn’t mean to.”
“No,” he quickly assures you, breathing hard, “that was so good, baby. It was perfect. Don’t apologize.”
It seems the brief window between climax and over-stimulation has passed, and a gasp falls from your dropped jaw, arching into him as your body unconsciously tries to find relief from the sensation. 
“Oh, god, Spencer, I—”
“You can take it, we’re getting close,” he promises. Not a demand, but meant as encouragement. “Do you think you can come for me one more time?”
“I don’t know,” you slur, the words rising to squeak. 
“I think you can. Come on, show me how you were touching yourself earlier.”
You whimper, but slide your hand from his shoulder and push it between your bodies. A gasp accompanies the jolt of your muscles as you make contact with your clit, probably demanding too much of it. Soon, however, the conflicted mewls melt into a rhythmic string of delicate, short moans, so pretty it’s like a practiced song. Spencer’s brain, usually overflowing with words, is nothing but a void of swirling fog—each of your perfect sounds, a little burst of light. Soon he’s making noises of his own, which you obviously adore if the way you tense around him is any clue. Usually he sublimates them into words, but he’s too tired, and you feel too good. Your combined moans, along with the sound of him fucking you and the sheets moving over skin make for a truly dirty soundscape. 
“Will you come inside me?” you beg breathlessly, and he can feel the movement of your hand speeding up as you get desperate. He sucks in a breath through his teeth at your plaintive request—the words bring him that much closer to finishing. 
“Yeah, baby. I’m—fuck, I’m not going to last.”
“Spencer—” and somehow, when you say his name like that, he knows exactly what you want. He bows his head and finds your lips, mostly blind in the dark, kissing you messily until that split second where his grip on reality becomes tenuous before the building pressure finally bursts. Multicolored fireworks explode behind his eyes as he moans against your lips and continues fucking you through his orgasm in strong thrusts for as long as he can. Thankfully you finish again just as he’s running out of steam. He rubs the spasming muscles of your thigh deeply as you writhe against him in your typical push-pull style—you don’t know what you want and it’s his job to hold you still and make you take it. After a moment you quiet down, stilling in his arms except for the continued expansion and contraction of your lungs. “Oh my god,” you breathe. “I can’t believe I did that. That’s so embarrassing.” Spencer chuckles breathily—kisses your forehead with his eyes still shut and slips a hand under your shirt to rub your back. 
“Why is it embarrassing? I liked it.”
“I have never—it’s never been so fast! It’s not supposed to be!”
“Why not?”
You huff.
“You’re the man. Men come too quickly. Not me.”
“I’m sorry you had to have two orgasms instead of one. Next time we’ll make sure you don’t come so we can even it out.”
You bury your face in his shoulder once more, immediately softening. 
“No! I take it back.”
“I thought you might.” His hand slides down your back, squeezing your ass affectionately. “Let's rally. We need to clean you up, angel.”
The pillow muffles your voice as you say, “I can’t. I’m asleep.”
“Can I record you saying that for playback in the morning when you ask me why I let you go to sleep with my come inside of you?”
“Spencer, I am seriously not moving. You woke me up. This is not a me problem.”
That makes him laugh, and he presses his lips to yours softly. After a long moment of his mouth moving slowly against yours, a needy little whine rushes from your nose, and it becomes evident he’s successfully kissed the attitude from you.
“You were so good, honey,” he murmurs against your lips. Another (shorter) kiss. “Did so well. I’m proud of you, baby.”
A second soft whimper from you as you chase his lips and he gives in once, briefly—knowing he can’t make you get up after this. How could he do that to such a sweet girl when she’s obviously completely exhausted? Jesus, you have him whipped. He recognizes that. And he made peace with it a long time ago. 
“Go back to sleep. I’ll clean you up.”
“Thank you,” you mumble, already slipping back into unconsciousness like you knew you’d get your way. Knowing your boyfriend, you probably did. “I love you.”
“I love you. Even though you’re a princess.”
You laugh. 
Ten-ish minutes later, once he’s done the best he can cleaning you up and is throwing the covers back over both of you, you startle him slightly by speaking. He thought you’d been asleep. 
“I don’t know what I did to deserve you,” you sigh dreamily, snaking your arms around him once more. Spencer’s cheeks heat up at the memory of the praise he’d shamelessly lavished upon you not long ago. He’s glad you’re barely awake, because he’s too flustered to think of a response. 
He loves it when you do that. 
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that-sarcastic-writer · 3 months ago
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Heavy Metal
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Logan Howlett x gf!reader
Summary: Logan makes you ride him with his dog tags. That’s all
Warnings: explicit sexual content, minors dni, p in v, unprotected sex, creampie, size difference, size kink if you squint, riding, the dog tags make an appearance
WC: 1.3k
A/N: so uh I was horny rewatching the first X-men tonight and lord his dog tags will be the end of me. So I wrote Logan making you ride him with his dog tags, you’re welcome
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It was almost a mock of your pathetic self, how pathetic you became when he was around. How oh so easily he could melt you into nothing more than desperate and pathetic sounds. And the dangling tags above your face were a crude reminder of just that. 
Your twisted expression of pleasure, lips parted open with each slide of his cock. His forehead is touching yours, one arm braced beside your head as he rutted you into the mattress. His lips parted as he spoke filthy praises into your ear, but all you could hear was the mocking sound of his dog tags dangling rhythmically with each drag of his cock. You couldn’t help but reach to grab at them, hang on to them for dear life. Logan was amused by this and he watched the way your shaking hands gripped the chain just enough without snapping it. A soft smirk pulled at his lip, fingers digging into your hips, surely to leave an aching reminder of what it was like to have him take you over and over. But he wanted to leave the bruises. He wanted to remind you of the things he could do to you, every night.  
“Like ‘em?” He hummed, and all you can do is whine in response. “How about you hold on to ‘em for a bit, hm?”
Confused, and distracted by your overwhelming pleasure, you stared up at him with big eyes and he just grinned at you as he pulled the tags over his head to throw them over yours instead. The metal sat on your bare chest, just over your racing heart, his name at first glance, as if he even needed the reminder of where your heart belonged. He leaned down to pull your lips into a kiss, a deep growl settling in his chest at the sight of you wearing his name. 
“Want to see you wear ‘em.” He shot you a look, damn near animalistic as he tilted his head at you. You stared at him with parted lips, the cool metal sitting on your chest making you shiver. “Could you be a good girl and sit on top of me with my tags? Hm?” 
Any day you could feel the delicious stretch of sitting on his cock was a day you deeply cherished. It was rare, as you could only handle so much of it. He was just so big, his thighs too wide, and as much as you both appreciated your vigor, it didn’t feel as good as when he fucked you. But you enjoyed it nonetheless. The look you gave him made him groan deep in his chest as you shakily switched places with him. He laid on his back unbothered, big arm behind his head as his eyes never left you, watching you as you climbed on top of him. You nearly drooled at the sight of his drenched cock. You totally did that. But who could ever blame you? He just made you feel so good. 
“You know what to do, sugar. You’re a big girl, you can take it.” There was a bit of humor in his voice, you could not, in fact, take it. You always whined and cried that he was too big, too thick, too much. But you still wanted every inch of it. Such a greedy little girl, but who was he to ever deny his sweet girl anything? 
You braced one hand on his chest as you slowly sank down on his cock. Your eyes immediately rolled into your head, lips parted open at the delicious burn of his thick cock stretching you open again. A deep breath settled in his chest, his other hand keeping a tight grip of your thigh, fingers digging into the plush skin. 
“Fuuck. Logan, fuck.” You whined, your nails digging into his chest as you took him inch by agonizing each. He totally wanted to just impale you on his cock, have you bouncing on his lap until you cried, but alas, he at least enjoyed how agonizing it was for you, because ultimately you were going to beg him to fuck you dumb. 
“I know baby, I know. Shh, you’re okay.” His large hand ran up and down your thigh, squeezing the flesh reassuringly as you slowly found your pace, the burning pain slowly turning to overwhelming pleasure as bounced on him like your life depended on it. Your sweet pathetic moans filled his ears again, but he was more mesmerized by the sight of his tags around your neck rhythmically bouncing with each of your movements. 
Logan couldn’t help it, not really, and his hips were meeting yours perfectly until you sobbed. He loved to hear the way you cried his name with each bruising drag of his cock. He loved it even more that his name was all over you, a visual reminder that he owned you, every part of you was his. Not that you would ever tell him otherwise, he has absolutely ruined every other man on earth for you. No other man on this earth could make you cry like this, on the verge of your third? Fourth? Who knew at this point. All you knew was that it felt so good, you just wanted to come so bad. And he knew it, too.
“Mhm. My sweet girl just wants to come, huh? You want to come all over this cock, hm?” His cock is damn near bruising your cervix, you can barely even keep up with his rough hips, you’re just bouncing on his lap begging to come. 
“Please, please Logan, need it—Ah—!” You gasped, bracing yourself with both hands on his hairy chest as he suddenly yanked you down by his tags, not hard enough to break them, but with enough strength to force you flush on his chest. His other arm wrapped around your back, and he held you down as he fucked you through your release. He always took control at the end, his pure primal and animalistic needs getting the best of him. But he couldn’t help it, he couldn’t help but abuse your aching pussy when you acted like this. But he knew you liked it when he used you. You sobbed into his chest, a combination of his name in between curses leaving your lips. The worst part was, he was still holding on to those damn dog tags. 
“Attagirl.. just like that sugar.” Logan held you on his cock as you gushed around him, splitting you wide open as he was close to pumping you full of himself just like he knew you loved. “Gonna fill you up. Gonna fill you up so much you’re gonna feel me inside you for days. You want that, don’t you, baby?” 
His lips on your ear, in between grunts he spoke his filthy words, and all you could do was nod in response, sobbing into his chest as the rough drag of his hips overstimulated your sensitive clit. He held onto the tags around your neck, a sign that only he could have you like this, or ever, and that you wanted it to be so, and he filled you until your mixed releases were seeping around your aching pussy. You were shuddering, your face pressed into his chest, like you had absolutely no intention of leaving there. 
His cock was still so deep inside you when he forced your head up by your hair, and he hooked two fingers around the tags, bringing them closer to him, as if he didn’t have every word and every number of his tags memorized. 
“I think you should keep these for a while. They look better on you, don’t you think darlin’?” 
As if you needed more proof that you were his, now you had a sign, a visual reminder to look at every waking minute. And the thought of him marking you as his like this, made you ache for him all over again.
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livecrow · 15 days ago
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You're out with friends and joke that you're “un-kidnappable”.
John Price and the lads think that’s interesting. 
Soft!Dark!John Price x fat fem reader
(cw: noncon)
You don’t recall exactly how it came up. Maybe it was the latest episode of a popular true crime podcast a couple of your friends mentioned listening to the other day.
All the same, while lounging in the familiar bar’s cozy glow, the atmosphere at the table stayed light and relaxed, despite the morbid topic. Between drinks, your friends detail stories of encounters with dubious men and swap self-defense strategies—anything to avoid an impromptu debut on a Dateline special.
They were mostly the basics. Remember to lock your doors immediately. Keep your phone on you. Never leave a drink unattended. Always travel in groups. Oh, and carry pepper spray. It turns out all of your friends carry some.
Not you, though. When you are inevitably questioned on the matter, you concede that you have some, "...somewhere."
Your mom gave you a little canister years back. But you admitted you don’t actually know where it is, much to the displeasure of your friends. Upon further interrogation, you guessed it’s probably in a drawer somewhere, lost among AAA batteries, tangled cords of unknown origin, and appliance instruction manuals. 
As one friend suggests the classic keys-between-your-fingers trick, some of the men at an adjacent table laugh.
“Best use for keys when you’re attacked is opening the damn door.”
Apparently, they had been following your conversation. It was the oldest man who spoke, rumbling over the rim of his glass with aplomb that leaves little room for argument. He has a resonance that makes you pause, reminding you distinctly of the distant rolling thunder that forebodes a coming storm. 
The dark, handsome man at his elbow agrees. “'Sides, they’re not brass knuckles. No stability. You’re not actually gonna cause any damage like that.”
“Aye, ye’r better aff jus’ takin’ one key an poppin’ the bastard’s een oot.” A man sporting a mohawk added with a grin, crudely miming gouging an eye out with his free hand.
“Fine, I’ll punch them out then!” the smallest of your friend group counters, palming her fist loudly while trying to keep a straight face.
That just earns more amusement, of course. The huge masked man at the end of their table scoffs, “Like that you’ll jus’ break your fuckin’ thumb.” He proceeds to instruct her how to make a proper fist. 
It's all in good fun. They’re an interesting bunch, probably military of some sort, you’d wager. Three Brits and one Scot. Your group welcomes the interruption, despite the biggest one of the lot looking particularly murdery himself, decked out in all black and a fucking skull balaclava. 
The gregarious, younger two made up for it. They were all smiles, speaking candidly as if they’d just run into some old friends. Before long you’ve practically joined tables. Why not? After all, the four certainly look like they know what they’re talking about, each man large and brawny.
The younger men did the vast majority of the talking, answering questions and enthusiastically offering techniques to their audience while Voorhees only interjected a brusque retort every so often. Your friends were utterly charmed by the Scot’s cheeky beam and the pretty Brit’s warm eyes as they moved from outlining bodily weak points with an emphasis on “soft targets” to discussing the pros and cons of different weapons.
But there was something about the man who initiated the discourse—some quality. He held an unspoken commanding presence, despite saying little. Here he was, the catalyst of the entire interaction, and yet he seemed content to observe rather than participate. It brought to mind some indifferent, deist higher power.
You estimated he was a decade his mates' senior, give or take. Apropos stormy eyes framed by heavy brows and the beginnings of crow's feet. Odd, antiquated facial hair, wood brown with smatterings of grey. Privately, you thought it suited him—looked distinguished. At some point earlier he caught your gaze. He introduced himself as “John.” Although, curiously, none of his cohorts called him that or introduced themselves in turn. Not that your friends seemed to mind; that, or they didn’t notice. 
Along with his name, he offered a subdued Duchenne smile that disarmed you, softening his gruff countenance in an instant. For an instant, anyway. You’d swear that, even in the bar’s low lighting, you caught his eyes twinkle. Some uncharacteristically childish sentiment swept over you for a moment, making you want to believe that the look was for you and that he wasn’t in reality only being polite.
“...honestly, if you have the stomach for it, your best choice is always gonna be a strap.”
The Scot readily agreed with pretty-boy, as he reclined, his chair balancing precariously on just the back two legs. However, they did quibble over the type of handgun, debating various specifications that were gibberish to the rest of you. While they all listen enraptured, only one of your friends really seems truly open to the idea. The rest unsurprisingly remain gun-shy. 
Another friend suggests a taser as a compromise.
“Not for me,” you laughed, “there’s absolutely no way my ass wouldn't immediately accidentally taser myself."
“No mace, no taser, no knife—not even one of those keychain alarms!” your friend groused. “You should have something—”.
Your eyes met again. You and John. Even with the subtle haze of alcohol relaxing you, it felt penetrating. 
Your eyes retreated down to his drink seeking relief. One of his large hands flexed slightly around his glass, thick tendons shifting under the skin and scattered vellus hair peeking over his cuff, dusting his knuckles. He seemed to be in thought as he took a drink. Whiskey you think it was. His shrewd eyes didn't leave you; maybe he was just looking through you—
“How do you keep yourself out of trouble then, love?” 
His timbre immediately cut through the chatter. If you weren’t feeling so fizzy from the drink, you might feel put on the spot when suddenly everyone’s eyes are singly on you.
You were effectively the token “fat one” of your group. While the rest of this friend group happened to be straight-sized, there was absolutely nothing “straight” on your body. Hell, there was hardly a part of you that didn’t jiggle, at least a little bit. You didn’t resent it; you were just self-aware. You were perfectly cognizant that you blended in among them about as well as a hippo “blends in" with oxpeckers.
If you were entirely sober, you might be a bit put out, might worry he’s being mean, poking fun at your expense. But no, the alcohol thankfully chased away any embarrassment from building in your gut. Besides, there’s no humor to be found in his expression, no edge of malice in his eyes. None of his mates crack a smirk either, apparently also interested in your answer.
You were mid-sip when the question was lobbed your way, and you used it to stall. You weren’t sure precisely why, but you found yourself squirming in your seat a bit before recovering half a second later. 
“Me?”, you grinned around your straw, cocking a brow. “Trust me, I’m not worried about it. I’m practically un-kidnappable,” you asserted, in a way that sounded suspiciously boastful.
John’s focus remains steady on you, appraising, but the other men share a glance. 
You could have left it at that, but pretty-boy chimed in, brow furrowing. "How do you figure that?" 
You weren’t completely sure that the men weren’t just being intentionally obtuse, but you’d entertain a ridiculous question with a ridiculous response. Flippancy came naturally. 
You set your drink back onto the table. You lean in, voice lowered to a grave tone, biting back mischief that threatened to give you away. “Listen, my strategy is airtight,” you paused. “If some guy comes along, tries something?" You hold again for dramatic effect.
"...Sit on him."
"Oh my god," your friends groan collectively.
But you went on, unfazed. "It's all over for him! Why would I need a weapon when I have positional asphyxia? Besides, if that doesn't kill him, the embarrassment will."
Any outrage falls on deaf ears considering your friends are fighting back grins.
Buoyed, you continue. "It’d be like someone trying to ‘kidnap’ an adult grizzly bear. I am not gonna get abducted unless the guy just happens to show up with a forklift—", that earns a swat from your friend sitting closest.
"—And if that's how I get caught? Honestly? I’d have it coming if I somehow missed the fucker rolling up and can't, what, power-walk out of there?"
Another friend beseeches, "Be serious!" 
“I am serious!" you shot back, laughing. "Those things go, what, 5 miles an hour, tops?"
Apparently, the rest of the group also found the image of a low-speed fucking forklift chase funny, judging by the Scot's almost spit-take that left him choking a bit. You were pleased that he and pretty-boy had a sense of humor and didn’t bother with the pretense of finger-wagging. 
You were disappointed you didn't get John, though. He only hummed thoughtfully, an odd liminal not-quite frown on his lips that was mostly obscured by his glass as he took another sip. 
Tough customer.
One friend challenges you, “Oh, yeah? You say that, but what if he pulls a gun and tells you to get in the car? What then?”
You pressed your lips together, tilting your head in consideration.
"Well, at that point, I guess I’d have to accept I'm going to die.”
"What?!"
You shrugged, "There's no way I'm getting in that car. You never go to a secondary location. Everyone knows that. Why drag things out unnecessarily when you can die in the street? After all, there are plenty of worse ways to go than by a bullet—besides, at least then my body will be found."
Worried the last bit would have more of a sobering effect on your company than you intended, you pivot and retrieve your drink. You tilt your chin up, gazing off into the distance dreamily, gesturing with your glass.
“My final words? 'Good luck trying to dispose of my corpse, asshole. Hope you know a good chiropractor.'"
With that you slurped down the dregs, ice clinking at the bottom, finally giggling with everyone else at your own joke. Cue lots of your name and "Stop it!"s. Hell, you even eked out a single low "heh" from Hot Topic that you’ll claim as a proper laugh. You were 3 for 4.
Your friends, bless them, are extremely predictable when you’re so candid self-deprecating. They laugh only to retreat to feigning scandal. When they recover, you’re peppered with more scenarios and protests. 
You’re barely able to suppress an eye-roll at their persistence. "I mean, it's a moot point from the start. I'm not the mark for that kind of thing in the first place."
Before your friends could cut you off, you clarified, “I’m not saying anything bad. I would just be—" you paused, searching for the right word—"an interesting choice." 
"No, I’m not the target demographic for something like that.” You waved a hand dismissively. “I'm simultaneously not preferable aesthetically and not worth the hassle logistically. So that ends up pretty convenient, considering I’d rather not be kidnapped." 
You swabbed the ring of condensation you left on the table with a bar napkin absently. "They want some dainty thing—they don’t want me,” you gestured to your person flippantly. “They want a trophy, but not the 'big game' variety," you gave a lopsided smile.
Your friends’ chastisement was swift, distracting enough that it didn’t quite give you a second to contemplate the strange, tenebrous emotion that was simmering just under the surface of John’s expression or that of his mates’. The nuance was lost on you. 
Mercifully, after experiencing a couple more variations of “You should be more careful!” from your friends, the topic finally changed. It transformed and split, becoming a bit too chaotic for you to follow in your current state; several simultaneous threads of conversation going at once turned into white noise.
After a while you must have zoned out a bit, because among the din you didn’t notice that John was now sitting near you. He leaned over discreetly, at a respectful distance that still made your head foggy and face warm, voice low.
“They’re right, you know. You might think you're an exception, but you’re not. Is dangerous to think that.” 
You're so struck by the intensity of his steely gaze that you were slow to catch up to the actual words. You couldn’t fathom how blue eyes could feel so searing; you’d swear you could feel their heat. Completely caught off-guard by the sudden seriousness, you struggled with how to respond to that. “I—”
Before you could say anything, you realized the Scot was talking to you, asking you something, reeling you back into the fray.
Time seems to pass differently after that; you have no idea how long it’s been, all talking and laughing, sharing bants. More rounds of drinks. It’s a good time. 
But the night is winding down for you; you can feel exhaustion creeping in. By the time one of your friends’ partners shows up ready to continue the fun elsewhere, you decline the offer. You hated being seen as a wet blanket, but right now all you wanted to do was go home and take a hot shower. Peel off your “going-out” clothes and change into something comfortable. Maybe order in and catch up on a show. A little, "dolce far niente".
They invited the men too, but apparently they had other plans. Your friends didn’t waste any time pouting, exchanging quick, tipsy goodbyes before heading out.
It’s much quieter after that. Even the light conversation between the men has fizzled out. The small bar that night was particularly slow, consisting mostly of your two groups to begin with. You pull out your phone to check the time, frowning when you find it dead.
“...I can call you an Uber?” John suggests, as you stand. The silence is loud, somehow. Oppressive. It looks as if the men are waiting. The air is heavy with something unsaid, some kind of significance that’s entirely lost on your fuzzy mind. You never noticed the inscrutable look Voorhees sends John after he spoke. You’d find too late that a lot of things skipped your boozy notice that night.
Your lip tugs at the offer. “Thanks, but I promise it’s fine. I actually live pretty close.” 
John just inclines his head, doesn’t press further. As you’re headed to the door, glancing back, you offer an earnest, albeit tired, smile. “Was nice meeting you. Maybe I'll see you around?” 
“Maybe.”
You were barely halfway home before suddenly, out of the darkness of a Cimmerian passing alley, arms locked around you, ripping an undignified squeal out of you.
When you catch sight of the familiar faces of your “attackers”, you clutch your chest, trying to calm your hammering heartbeat.
“Fucking hell!” you heaved.
If you weren’t so rattled and clamoring over your words, you would have been especially mortified by the incidental contact on your squishy middle. You couldn’t remember a time someone has grabbed you so brazenly. By process of elimination, it must have been Hot Topic’s large form who was holding you against his front.
“Shit! You guys are assholes,” you exclaimed between pants. “That’s not funny!” Your hands grasped at the large forearms around you, yanking fruitlessly.
It was John who was standing in front of you, thumbs hooked in his pockets, backlit by a streetlamp, haloed in faint breath vapor. It was the first time you’d recall seeing him standing; he was even bigger than you expected. They all were. 
“You left, what—” he pulled out his phone and glanced down at the blueish light in his hand, “20 minutes ago?” His eyes return to your face, raising his thick brows. “Not very ‘close’, is it? Your home.” John spoke conversationally, a picture of ease, like he was commenting on how chilly the weather was tonight and hadn’t practically jumpscared you.
“Dinnae even try tae throw a punch, no’ even one o’ those girly slaps—” the Scot muttered, not particularly quietly, to pretty-boy, who kissed his teeth in disapproval.
You’re running on fumes, so your brain is moving in slow motion, only just processing John’s words, not yet able to summon even a glare for the Scot’s commentary.
“It is close,” you insist, coming out slightly more defensively than you intended. You’re still embarrassingly working overtime to catch your breath while trying to pull away from the hard body at your back in irritation. “Besides, how do you define ‘close’? That’s completely subjective.” Not as if that’s any of your business. You held back that particular remark.
You took a measured breath or two more. “Look, of all people, I appreciate the commitment to a bit,” you clawed uselessly at Voorhees’ iron grip around you, “but can you call your dog off?” 
Hot Topic’s previous abridged facsimile of a “laugh” echoed in your ear, an amused huff so close that it made you flinch. That wasn’t really what you expected from your unadvisable barb. You think it was the material of his mask that you felt slightly graze the shell of your ear, but it was fleeting enough that you couldn’t be certain.
“You can call me Ghost, sweet’eart”.
On any other day that edgy moniker would have garnered some kind of mirth, but your clouded brain didn’t seem fit to supply a witty retort with some strange man at your nape.
While John said nothing, something in his expression must have communicated to Ghost. You instinctively relaxed when his arms released your middle. It soothed your nerves a touch, enough that you didn’t register that you were in the process of being edged backwards and were now partway through an alley you should have passed on your route home.
You crossed your arms, opting to ignore the introduction in lieu of another shaky inhale. “Just wait till my friends hear that you guys blew them off just to fuck with me. So much for having ‘plans’, huh?”
You tried to tease, still desperately attempting to slow your heart, recoup some composure, and match the men’s nonchalance. You’re not sure how convincingly you pulled it off. Some nagging anxiety still seeped out of you in a slow leak, despite your best effort to pull yourself together, to not be a buzzkill in response to a technically harmless pran—. 
“This is the ‘plan’, love.” John replied simply, not missing a beat.
You huffed in exasperation, brows pinched. “...What, ‘making a point’?”
John paused for a moment, seeming to weigh his words, “That’s one way to look at it, if you’d like.”
There was a pregnant pause, and suddenly the scrape of shoes on the dirty pavement seemed loud in your ears. The smell in the alley is particularly damp and musty now. Had you been moving this whole time? You’re getting all turned around—
Pretty-boy cut in, “You know, your whole premise was faulty from the start. ‘Sides you didn’t account for more than one person being involved”. 
“Involved in what?” you blinked, bewildered. 
“Your kidnapping, obviously.”
“My k—?”.
“—Speak for yourself, Gaz. I’d ‘ave ‘er either way.” Ghost interrupted, making you jump, a stark reminder of the presence still at your back.
You were stunned into silence for a couple of excruciatingly long seconds before choking out a pained laugh. “Ha-ha. Alright—alright, fine. I get it.” You raise your hands in surrender, head swiveling back to John as you turn to press your back against the rough brick of the alley wall, trying to keep them all in your field of vision. 
“I’ll get a taser or something, is that what you want?” you offered, wearing your best expression of deferent contrition.
When John finally peels his eyes from you, he just sighs heavily, shaking his head at the pavement; either in disapproval or disbelief, you couldn’t be sure which. 
“Bit late for that now.”
“…What—what the hell is that supposed to mean?” You stutter indignantly.
You were starting to feel woozy; maybe you drank a bit too much. Your sole scuffs against debris, almost tripping you up completely if not for the brick wall to steady you. Your palms sting as they slide slightly on the stone, but you don’t dare take your eyes off them to look down for even a second. 
Suddenly, with a furtive glance over Ghost’s shoulder, you realize you're almost out on the other side of the street. His massive form fills the alleyway, destroying any hope you’d be able to squeeze your wide body past him or John and the others on your opposite side.
Your mouth is painfully dry. Your throat works, trying to swallow but still managing to somehow choke on nothing. You force some authority you don’t feel into your tone, but it tapers off rather weakly.
“Listen, you’ve had your fun. I really need to get home.”
You were struck by how different they all seemed compared to hardly a half an hour prior. The shift was dramatic—made your head spin. It was hard to rationalize that the people who were just sitting across from you in the homey local bar sharing drinks and the people now caging you into a dreary, abandoned street corner were one and the same. 
An approaching streetlamp visible through the yawning maw of the alley cast harsh shadows on their faces. A literal “light at the end of a tunnel” that only offered you dread.
You swayed slightly on your feet, head darting around, desperately trying to keep an eye on the four of them. You were feeling suddenly inexplicably drunker than you felt mere moments before. As your knees quivered and you tried to steady yourself, John remained a pillar in your wobbly field of vision. Watching. Waiting. 
You're not sure which was preferable, the ominous comments or the ominous silence.
You weren’t small. You’d never felt small in your life. But with a group of large men looming over you, it was suddenly hard not to. It was not a feeling you were accustomed to and one you didn’t enjoy now. You needed air, it was getting impossible to think. You tried to speed your gait to no avail; you couldn’t gain any distance. They prowled, following you closely, as if there was a gravitational pull anchoring them to you. 
“Fine. Fine! Okay, you proved your point, alright?!” you exclaimed, getting more frantic by the second, louder. “Let me pass. I’m serious.”
“Oh, so now she’s serious…” Gaz teases, somewhere off to your left.
“You think I’m not?” John husked, sounding incredulous, forehead lines deepening as he raised his brows, tucked his chin to stare down at you through hooded eyes. “Love, I’m serious as a heart-attack.” 
He was smiling at you again. It looked the same as before. Sincere. But where previously it endeared you, now, now it makes your heart stall, then shudder in your ribcage; fill you with the sensation of a freefall, the one that jolts you awake while on the very precipice of sleep, leaves your heart racing, despite the tranquil darkness. 
His eyes flick over your head.
Before you are able to register the glance, Ghost is suddenly on you again, grabbing you round the middle quicker than someone his size had any right to be, this time actively herding your large form forward. You realized dully that his last grip on you must have been relatively loose compared to his grip on you now; it was clearly only a fraction of his actual strength.
“What are you doing?!” You cry, a hair's breadth away from a shriek. Your head whips back to John, imploring, “Stop—Stop, I don't know what you want!”
This is probably what it feels like to be a frog. Pounced on and scooped up roughly by some huge creature—some grubby kid’s scrambling fingers. Slippery, round body gripped tight.
You were finally out of the alley, pulled by Ghost as well as your own unsteady feet, your body's instinct to try and avoid cracking your cranium on the concrete abetting him, betraying you.
“What we want?” Ghost chaffed over you, mimicking your voice. “Go on then,” he urged, “give your ‘ead a wobble?” 
You could practically feel him cocking his head, feel his smile even with him against your back, even behind the mask.
The open air did nothing for you. It didn’t clear your mind or relieve the claustrophobia churning in your belly a single iota. After all, it wasn’t really the walls closing in on you—it was bodies.
“You’re just trying to scare me!” You accuse sharply, voice strained, grunting as you only manage to nearly heimlich yourself on the last attempt to free yourself from the steel grip around your midsection.
Gaz and the Scot chuckle.
John says your name. He utters it like it was a complete sentence, but you're not sure what it means, what he wants. Either way, it made you regret giving it to him. You suddenly preferred not hearing it on his lips in that rumbling baritone.
Ghost scoffs. “For ‘avin such a smart mouth she’s a bit thick, eh, Soap?” he comments meanly over your head.
Soap’s responding before you have a chance to voice any displeasure, somewhere between a laugh and a scold.
“A bit? Haud yer wheesht!” He turns his attention quickly back to you, leaning in close, “Aw, pet, dinnae pay him mind…Lt kens our bonnie is well thick”, he pats your cushioned hips affectionately.
A shocked gasp slips out of you unbidden at the brief but unmistakable gentle fondle of your fat love handles. They all drank in the vulnerable, little noise. It would be the first of many. It was impossible to interpret the gesture as anything but “familiar”.
Your body jolts. You would have practically jumped a foot off the ground if not for Ghost anchoring you. With the hold, stark realization floods you like a bucket of ice water—there’s quite literally nothing you can do to avoid any of their touch. Your skin crawls at the unfamiliar contact and doubly so at the threat of more yet.
“Dead fit,” Gaz says readily, sounding like an agreement if you’ve ever heard one, his eyes roam your form.
Words were stolen from your overheating brain, still trying desperately to reboot, to process what the fuck is going on.
“Captain ‘s a man of taste—such a pretty, dainty thing,” Ghost sneers in your ear. “Playin’ coy now, when she was practically battin’ ‘er lashes all night.” 
“—It’s not too late—it’s a joke, right? Let’s—we can just forget about this—”
Ghost completely ignores you. “Soft thing like you prancin’ ‘round, cunted at this hour, thinkin’ you're safe?”
“Cun—? I’m not fucking drunk!”
“You’re lucky someone with bad intentions didn’t hear you.” The grin is loud in his tone, oozes off every syllable.  
“You think I'm a dog? So you knew wha’ you were doin’ then? You were teasin’ a ‘ungry dog, waving a juicy steak under ‘is nose. Rubbing it in all our faces, of any bloke ‘n earshot?”
“What—what the hell are you talking about?! You—you can’t be serious!” You finally parroted uselessly, equal parts baffled and horrified. These men are crazy.
“She keeps sayin’ tha’,” Soap comments, perplexed.
“‘Denial’ ‘s not just a river,” Gaz shrugs.
Ghost continues. “Captain—” A big hand is suddenly on your jaw, centering your gaze back on John, ”—‘s doin’ you a kindness. Keepin’ you safe n’ sound, makin’ sure you don’t get yourself chewed up 'n some dirty fuckin’ alley,” nodding back towards the way they came, “Nice of ‘im, innit?”
You flailed desperately, hoping to catch Ghost off guard for even a second. You send your elbow into his ribs, as hard as you could manage at the awkward angle. It was akin to hitting granite. You sucked in air through your clenched teeth as pain radiated through your ulnar nerve. His grip on you didn't waver, he didn't flinch. He laughed.
A true, low “heh, heh, heh”, that you regretted ever wanting to hear—could have happily gone your whole life without hearing. It sent rogue shivers down your spine and piloerection up your arms as you gawked up in shock, pain forgotten.
“Och, that’s a bit better, Bonnie.” Soap feigns, judging your strike like he’s trying not to hurt your feelings.
“John—” you plead helplessly, turning your gaze back to him. But saying his name was a mistake, deepening the look already there. Rubatosis filled you.
“Think you're strong, eh? That you could ever ‘urt any of us? Show ‘im you can fend f’ yourself then.” Ghost wobbled you to and fro, shook you, as if you were some weightless bauble. 
As your world tilted, you instinctively gripped his arm for dear life, dizzy, afraid you would topple over. You knew he was right, of course; there is no point denying it. 
But a man like him, like them—saying it? It was wrong—it chilled your blood. It felt needlessly cruel, to rub in how weak you are compared to them. The provocation freezes you, making Ghost’s dark eyes crinkle. 
“Slim pickings, huh? Must be feeling desperate?” you bit out, before you could stop yourself, voice bitter and thick with emotion—panic and anger congealing into snark. A hole is a hole, after all. Bad luck that you happened to be the one around.
Who would you trade places with? Better you than someone else, your conscience whispered faintly.
“You really don’t get it?” John wonders aloud, bafflement mixing with a heady intensity.
“Imagine thinking no one would want all this—” Fingers grazed your curves. Touched every roll, every hill and valley on your side with a reverence that shocked you for the hundredth time that day, left your mouth literally agape. 
“—thought is an utter travesty. One of life’s greatest pleasures is a big, soft girl. Nothing sweeter,” he declared breathily despite himself. “Nothing. So much more to hold, to squeeze—”
There was a certain palpable greediness to his touch, even while he was restraining himself. Groping, not bruising. He only went so far, skirting frighteningly close to your more private bits. At least it appeared your actual debasement was not going to happen on this particular street corner. His hands make a slow jaunt, mapping your contours. Down your back, your side, your belly, your thighs—kneading and squeezing your ample flesh.
A pitiful, “Please stop—” is eked out of you. Your unadulterated fear on full display, sincere and raw. Begging. You were begging, or trying to, anyway. Your breath hitched, flesh jolting with every unwelcome brush against you, sending your nerve endings alight, already feeling overstimulated. 
There was that expression again, that you didn’t recognize before. But it was no longer just simmering under the surface; it was boiling. Emanating out through his pores, muddled with a touch of pity. You finally recognized it—hunger.
“I’m not cross with you,” he adds oddly. “You don’t understand now, but you will. This isn’t a punishment—it’s a consequence.” 
Your throat clamped painfully, words tumbling out of your mouth incomprehensibly, trying to find the right thing to say to make him stop. More hands were on you, pulling your wrists together in front of you. “Please, I don’t, I can’t, wh—”
“Am not going to hurt you. You have my word.” The solemnity of the promise rattled you. Maybe he truly believed it, but you certainly didn’t. After all, you’d wager you had different definitions of “hurting”. You’d die on the hill that this was “hurting” someone.
Somewhere inside you, your body was screaming at you to do something. You’d take the inspiration.
Scream what, exactly? You couldn’t be sure. You should scream “fire” not “help”, right? But you’d never get the chance, because on your inhale, John’d somehow divined your intentions, and suddenly a hand was clamped over your lips before a sound could escape them. The pressure of the palm was close to bruising this time, unyielding—he wasn’t taking any chances, apparently. 
Jerking your head did nothing to dislodge the hand, unlike those on your limbs. It followed the movement rather than impede it. As fate would have it, your struggles only left your head spinning, vision partially obscured by the force of the hand pushing your plump cheeks into your eyes. Whiplash pinched in your neck at the frantic jerks. God, you felt sick.
After that, everything happened very quickly. Suddenly it felt like there were hands all over you, everywhere. Grabbing, holding, pressing. You could hardly tell up from down.
You’d shut your eyes for even a momentary reprieve, willing the vertigo to cease. For everything to stop. For all of them to stop touching you. Hoping desperately that you’d wake up and find yourself safe in bed, this all a bad dream. 
Then there was a ripping sound, then a couple more. Someone was pushing stray hairs out of your face. The hands on your wrists moved up instead to grip your forearms. No sooner than you heard it, the large hand had fled your lips only to be immediately replaced by some large sticky substance that was stretched taut across your mouth, from cheek to cheek.
Startled, your struggles renewed, some expletives trapped by the stuff, transforming into useless “mphhhing!” as your hands jumped to pull the offending material from your face. An entirely fruitless endeavor considering the grip on your arms, which didn't budge an inch. John seems fit to ignore your pitiful struggle, simply smoothing it out carefully, layering a couple more pieces. He hums in satisfaction, wide palm patting his work, cupping your mouth and jaw again for good measure.
There was that sound again. With the fear it shot through you, it might as well have been a gun racking. You couldn’t see it, but this time your sloshy mind recognized the distinct creak and shrill shrrrrrrrrrrrp. It was duct tape being pulled from the roll, then wrapped noisily around your wrists, aided by the hands forcing your arms together. 
Trying to shove, to bully yourself between them was hopeless. They were all too close, too strong, too heavy, all bearing down on you. You didn’t have room to throw your weight around or even properly kick out at them. Round and round, the tape went, and round and round again for good measure before the end was ripped, smarting where it snagged slightly on the hair on your arms. 
You're quite literally fighting for your life, sweating with exertion and panic, panting behind the tape, but your desperate flailing didn’t deter them at all; you didn’t receive even a single hitch in any of their breath for your effort. Hell, it couldn’t even hinder some conversation. Not that you caught most of it with your head swimming, heart pounding loudly in your ears.
“—‘course she’s scrikin’, we’re nicking ‘er,” Ghost rolls his eyes. 
Something else was said, probably by Soap, based on the accent.
Ghost just doubles down. “No point tryin’ to talk sense into ‘er. Thing doesn’t know what’s good for ‘er—“
John took his time; he’s dedicated to his task. Precise yet generous with the tape. As soon as the hands left your forearms, more tape was applied where they departed, this time around your entire body, effectively pinning your arms down at your front, circling you enough times that you lost count.
Your struggles and thrashes reinvigorate, an absolutely method portrayal of a snared rabbit. It hurt—hurt how hard you were pulling against them. Bruises would undoubtedly bloom in the coming days wherever their hands gripped you from your wild jerking. That is, assuming you lived that long. Your chest heaves with anxiety. The men allowed you a bit more space, enough that you didn’t feel actively compressed on every side. By them at least.
Not John, though. It was his face that filled your vision, his eyes that pinned yours.
“Shhh. There’s a girl. It’s already over.” You hadn’t yet noticed the tears gathering, that you were so close to falling apart. He said it like it would be some sort of comfort, cupping your plump cheeks delicately. John spoke to you gently, in the softest tone you’d heard yet, softer than you would have believed his husky voice capable of, and yet, with an disturbing finality. “It’s done. Nothing you can do now,” he whispered into your terrified face. 
He was too close—there was a little mole on the right side of his nose you never noticed before. He smelled of smoke, and under that, something woodsy and spicy. A large, rough palm smoothed over your hair. Your terrified eyes squeezed shut, willing him out of your face, to stop looking at you. You’re certain he could feel your terror; hell, he could probably feel each little panicked puff of air forced out of your lungs on his face as you tried vainly to regulate your breathing through your nose. “There you go,” he praised, “In and out.”
Shining tears wobbled precariously in your waterline. You tried with all your might not to let them loose, to salvage any shred of dignity. Any sense of control. As if that would somehow make things worse, as you sucked in a wet, sniveling sound.
Your internal pleas for space were less than useless, as John leaned in ever closer, cradling your skull in his hands, pressing his lips to your crown in a chaste, whiskery kiss.
The sheer intimacy of the gesture made you balk. Held and boxed in, there was no way to move away, making you whimper pathetically. Sounding foreign to even your own ears. A savourable sound, that went right to John’s belly.
Trying to hold it in was all for naught; as soon as John’s lips touched you, your resolve shattered. Shattered into so many pieces even Kintsugi couldn’t repair it. Your face was soaked with the onslaught, tears traveling as far as down your neck. Dizzy with panic, the duct tape swallowing up most of your damp sobs. You couldn’t recall the last time you'd broken down like that in front of another person, much less four near strangers. 
“I’m keeping you.” He says suddenly. He waits for you to take in the words, thumbs stroking slow circles into your cheekbones.
You hiccup behind the tape, teeth chattering in your clenched jaw as you realize you’re shaking. Face tacky with tears. You angrily tried to pull away again, but John just held you still as you quake. 
…John didn’t need Ghost for muscle, you realized dully. His grip was an epiphany, the promise of strength in his hands alone—it made you feel all the more useless.
Calloused thumbs rasped over your cheeks, wiping away the wetness there, only for more to replace them. “I won’t try to stop you from crying, won’t punish you for being upset,” he rumbled, “but, you have to understand it won’t change anything. What'll happen. From now on, you’re mine—but I take care of what’s mine. You’ll see.”
Why?! Your heart ached. You couldn’t understand how people you’d been chatting and laughing with mere minutes ago could do this to you. People who had seemed so normal—
Gaz smirks, nudging Soap, murmuring, “Oh, don't worry, she’ll feel heaps better when she’s creamin’ on—”
You didn't think you were capable of feeling worse. Your eyes bulge in horror, breath snagging again in your throat.
John sighs, interrupting him with a harsh jangle of metal as he pitched some keys to Gaz, who caught them easily in one hand. “Bring the car ‘round will you?” John asks, but it’s really not a request.
“On it!” Gaz’s reply is prompt and cheery as he steps off the curb into the darkness beyond the reach of the streetlamp, practically a spring in his step. 
You sniffled, sinuses starting to burn, following your eyes’ watery influence. Feeling humiliated as you can feel your nose start to run, tickling your philtrum. Soap cooed over your teary face. You flinched as he raised his hand to you, but he only wiped your nose, disgustingly with his own sleeve. 
He had the nerve to look chagrined at your reaction. When he spoke again, it was uncannily quiet compared to his familiar boister, as if he was trying to soothe a spooked horse. “Dinnae fash, it’ll be awricht, bonnie, swear it.”
His words were worthless; didn’t pacify you at all. You were possessed by a primal terror of a cornered animal that couldn’t fathom what was going to happen to it. Your eyes flooded, everything in your vision warped by tears. You couldn’t see, couldn’t hear over your own hammering heart. Soap’s cursin’, saying something. Maybe it was fucking Gaelic, you didn’t understand what he was saying.
“—Wee lamb, greetin—”
“‘Nough fussin’, Soap. You’re almost as bad as ‘er.” 
“Ah ken, ah ken…”
“I did warn you, even gave you an out.” John sighed, commiserating, as if he weren’t the source of your angst. It wrung completely hollow, he didn't sound disappointed in the slightest with any of the events. If anything, you'd suspect we has trying to tamp down the opposite.
“Jesus wept, Cap—” Soap blurts, any remorse apparently long forgotten as he suddenly grips your ample belly possessively, making you shriek“—almost made us lose out.” he grumbled “Ah knew ye were tryin’ tae tip ‘er aff”. You thrashed in his rude hold, face hot, but he just grinned, loved how your squirms just showcased your enticing bounce.
Despair and humiliation ached in your chest, heavy like lead. You just wanted to go home.
Headlights round the corner.
In a last-ditch attempt, you allow yourself to completely go limp, following through on the threat of being unmovable. You barely start tipping before Ghost and Soap are on either side of you, holding you up between the two of them, completely halting your descent.
Your mind shuddered to a halt with the idea they might actually be able to lift you. When you tried to buckle your knees, they went ahead and confirmed your fears true. Not even a slipped grunt of exertion gave you any satisfaction, when you were being half carried, half dragged practically kicking and screaming to the car. Well, as much as you could through the tape. As you’re urged onward, you lock your knees as your legs jam against the car’s running board.
“You’re going one way or another,” John calls simply, tapping something into his phone.
“Watch your head, trophy.” Ghost grins, huge hand spanning your skull, pushing you down past the door frame, but you think you just might have preferred the concussion. Your own weight does the rest of the work, sending you sprawling belly first onto the back seat, teary cheek smooshed against the cool, leather interior.
You should have been prepared to be absolutely as difficult as possible, regardless of whether or not it’d change your fate, but you were utterly spent. Your limbs ached at all the struggling. You couldn’t muster any more fight as Soap and Ghost maneuvered you into the middle seat. Your plentiful "handholds" aiding the process.
The lone lap belt buckled tightly across your lap before Ghost and Soap followed you in, sandwiching you, sitting in the seats on either side. You were practically spilling over onto them, it was a tight fit. 
You couldn’t quite swallow a yelp as rough fingers were wedged under your plush form on either side. Apparently unsatisfied with your positioning, you were swiveled so your ass remained in the seat while the rest of your body lay flat. Your upper body in Ghost's lap and legs curled in Soap’s, the seat belt digging into your soft belly at the awkward angle.
You were normally hyperaware of the space you occupied and tried to be as respectful as possible about it. You would be mortified, feel a bolt of white-hot shame if any squishy bit of you even accidentally brushed up against someone else. You’d do anything to risk a stranger's look of annoyance or disgust, god forbid someone say something. And yet, here you were, your fat body draped across two men's laps, both looking quite fucking pleased with the arrangement. There was nothing you could do about it, as Soap paws at your thigh, humming happily.
“Behave, you lot.” John stoops, smiling at the group fondly as he shuts the door.
The car is moving.
You were completely adrift. Maybe you were in shock. All it took was a handful of seconds for your life to become entirely and irrevocably derailed. 
While lying prone, the motion rocked you slightly. Outside the window, the world flitted by. All you could make out from your vantage point was the wide expanse of sky, purplish, the color of a dusky developing bruise, only swagging power lines and the tops of towering street lamps flashing across the horizon.
Just like that, slow conversation started up again, right above your head. It was as if they were back at the bar; the normalcy of it was chilling. Soap’s hands were still resting over your thick thigh, petting you. Repetitive strokes up and down your thigh that also eventually blended into the background. The car was so warm now—John must have cranked the heat. You feel the warmth dust across your face where it filtered into the backseat.
You're feeling floaty—disconnected. Your body couldn’t sustain the level of terror that should still be at the forefront of your mind. Adrenaline burned everything out of you, drained you till there was nothing left but fog, thick and cloying. It became a task to keep your eyes open.
You were so tired. 
Your limp body bounced lightly as the car went along. The voices were even more distant now, a muted background noise, like someone speaking on the phone in the next room over—you can just hear the mumble through the wall but can’t decipher any of the words.
“—get some proper rest on the plane.”
(I horked this up originally after re-reading one of @391780 posts. I think it was the one where Simon calls dibs on you while you're out with friends? Clearly things deviated a lot, but still. Do yourselves a favor and read all of their stuff.)
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mangostarjam · 10 days ago
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you've been touching him a lot since he got back.
itoshi sae doesn't do anything about it — doesn't dissuade you from tugging at his sleeve or sliding his jacket zipper back and forth while you talk. doesn't comment or bring your attention to it.
but he watches.
you've been around him a lot since his plane landed, making up for all the time he's spent abroad, as if your daily chat threads haven't been enough. most of the time it's just the two of you, the way it used to be. sometimes his brother is around, though thankfully it doesn't seem like you've gotten any closer to rin since sae left.
other times there's a group, mostly your friends, a mix of guys and girls who don't seem to know what to do with themselves around him. sae is used to this — fame brings strange things to light — but you treat him as you always have, except for the touching.
you don't touch anyone else.
it makes him think.
sae has his reasons. he's never let your relationship get past that line, drawn in the sand. he's a professional football player on the other side of the world, and you have a life here. you have friends (even though you still call him your best friend), you have a job (that you complain about all the time), you have family (that can't be bothered to ever congratulate you on anything).
it wouldn't be right — to make you leave. to take you away. not when he needs to focus on being the best in the world.
(he is the best in the world. all those years ago he showed the U-20 team in japan the difference between them, the way the most they could hope for was dating a gravure model. sae never cared about that aspect. he already had you.)
he lets you touch him, but he doesn't touch you back. he keeps you at arm's length — where you're safe.
and then you ask him to be your wingman.
someone else — touching you? kissing you? having you? unthinkable. sae steps out of the shower and barely dries off before pulling on his briefs and pants. steps into his room and there you are, sitting on his bed, looking good, if a little sad.
he considers telling you to get your passport updated and catches the way your eyes trail down his form. maybe this conversation would be easier if he's wearing a shirt — your gaze is too heated, too distracting. you probably think you're being sneaky, hiding your feelings as best as you can, but sae knows you.
and your casual touches are ocean waves washing that line in the sand away.
sae walks towards his closet when it happens again. your finger in his belt loop, stopping him in his tracks. "what?"
"you were ignoring me," you say. "i asked if my outfit is okay."
your outfit is more than okay. "i would have told you to change if it wasn't."
"if you're going to be my wingman, shouldn't you hype me up?" you huff.
sae feels his jaw clench at the reminder. "no," he says, and his tone comes out cold. you don't seem to notice, falling back on his bed and testing every bit of self control in his grasp. "this is a waste of time."
he goes to pull on a shirt before he does something drastic. you're saying something, but it hardly matters when his flight leaves if you'll be on the plane with him. you've covered your eyes with your forearm, so you miss the way he pauses at the foot of the bed, teal eyes drinking in your form splayed out so defenselessly.
sae climbs over you silently, knees nudging yours apart, hands planted on either side of your body. "this is a waste of time," he repeats, watching with amusement as you take in his position. a blush sweeps across your face, but you don't push him off. that's a good sign, at least.
"what, you think i'm not worth being a wingman for?" you ask. silly. you have no idea.
and then you reach for his belt loops again, as if that's a totally normal thing to do and not something that drives him a little nuts every time. sae prides himself on his control, though, so he doesn't lean down to kiss you just yet.
"tell me," sae says, "have you become this touchy with all your friends since i've been gone?"
"n-no?"
it's cute, how wide your eyes get. sae leans down a little closer. feels your breaths on his lips. still doesn't kiss you — yet. "then i won't be your wingman. you don't need one."
"why not?"
do you know how breathless you sound? sae considers his apartment in spain, how he'll need to make sure the bedroom doesn't share any walls with the neighbors. the way you sound is all for him and him alone.
"because you have a boyfriend, now."
(companion piece to this)
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baeshijima · 3 months ago
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— stardust
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the world is a vast place. in the grand scheme of things, humans are but a speck of dust; much like how you are sure you are nothing but a meagre speck of dust in the world he lives in, forever to be remained unseen. (if only you knew how you are the brightest star he'd ever laid his eyes upon.)
CONTAINS : gn!reader, 1.5k wc, royalty!au, contract marriage/marriage of convenience, fluff, smitten reca bc what would he be other than smitten, a little hint of bittersweet at the end if read between the lines aha...
A/N : ....i have a paper due monday. i havent started it. why do i do this to myself. (reca i love u can u not hear my cries and wails as fic after fic appears in my brain for u...)
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Duke Reca of the northern territory; to many he is a well-accomplished noble, a young genius set for greater things, and the owner-slash-founder of the top theatre company. He is an idol — a role model to those who aspire to be more involved in the artistic side of the world.
To you, however, he is an absolute lunatic, the bane of your existence, and your contractual husband.
It's not like you had much choice. It was either: a) remain as a hollow puppet whose strings danced at your family's fingertips, or b) find some way to escape with outside power.
You, of course, chose the second option. Unfortunately, that somehow led to you meeting the young duke when out in the shopping district, trying to escape the suffocating presence of your family's knights accompanying you by running into a secluded alleyway, even if it was for but a momentary breather.
It was a whirlwind of a meeting... quite literally. Bodies flew; clothing tousled; breaths stolen. Well, at least for you it was like this. He, on the other hand, looked right as rain. (Lucky bastard.) You hadn't realised it was him at first, too absorbed in hasty apologies and the numbing bloom spreading across your backside like a wildfire (really, they ought to incorporate more padding in these flimsy clothes!), but when he uttered an apology of his own for not paying attention to his surroundings with an arm outstretched to help you stand, your mind all but blanked. What was someone of his status doing in a dingy alley? Didn't the newspapers report word of his self-confinement, having not stepped foot outside his manor in fervent preparation of his upcoming performance?
No, never mind all that; wasn't this a blatant opportunity being presented to you? An outside power that could help you escape the clutches of your family...
With gritted teeth, all sense of self-dignity was cast aside as you grasped his outstretched hand with both of your own, gazing into his widened eyes with your own narrowed ones.
"Your Grace, I know this is hardly the appropriate time nor place, but please... marry me!" Your words echoed within the enclosed space. Duke Reca blinked slowly down at you, and it was then you realised you never elaborated. "In... in a contractual marriage of convenience, of course."
"Oh?" he grinned, amusement and intrigue twinkling in his eyes. "And what is it you can offer me?"
"I..." Truthfully, there was nothing you could offer which would be beneficial to someone like him who had everything at the tips of his fingers. You were but a speck of dust in his world, merely floating and remaining unseen within his view. But even so, here you kneeled before him, his gaze wholly fixated on a speck of dust such as yourself. If nothing else, you at least had your desperation — a desperation to be your own person. "My lineage may be from that of a baron's, but I am confident I can be of use to you if you would permit it. So long as you accept my offer, I will do anything to aid you, whether that be through practical means or a performance you wish to see."
A beat of silence.
"Ha... haha... ahahaha!!"
And, as if things couldn't get any worse than a sore rear and disgruntled self, you were pulled out of your daze by a pair of gleaming carmine eyes, a maniacal grin, and his body, now kneeled just like you were, so very close to your own.
"That determination... how brilliantly you burn with such an expression!" The sheer glee which bled through his tone sent shivers down your spine, having never realised someone so esteemed had such a side to him. The duke breathed a breathy laugh and slightly backed up, his hands still holding your arms. "Alright, I look forward to seeing how brightly you will shine in your performance, my dear leading actor."
...Was it too late to back out and find an alternative solution?
Admittedly so, for the next thing you knew vows were declared and you were moved into the duke's residence. You could still remember your family's aghast expressions the moment you declared you were marrying Duke Reca and thus cutting ties with them. It was oddly freeing to see their contorted faces reveal their true nature.
Life as the duke's spouse was... something, to say the least. His servants and attendants almost seemed to have shed tears of joy at the revelation of their ever so lonely duke (their words, not yours) finally settling down and getting married, asking you questions such as how you both met, what drew you to their duke, who popped the question first, why you chose him of all people, so on so forth. It was... cosy. Something you admittedly weren't very accustomed to, but found yourself welcoming nonetheless.
One thing you never expected was for the duke to have a little pet of his own; a little toad dressed in a miniature beret and matching suit, at that. Assistant Director is what Reca had called her, and you think for someone so obsessed with the arts he ought to up his naming sense. She was also quite susceptible to compliments, something you discovered when commenting on the little toad's cute attire, with the duke's baffling translation of her bashfulness and her own compliment on your own looks. Apparently. You're not really sure, but you're inclined to believe it ever since she claimed a spot on your shoulder.
As the days-turned-weeks-turned-months bled into each other, you found yourself oddly lost at how well-adapted you have become of your new life and the duke's personality. From impromptu displays of affection both in and outside the manor to sporadic radio silence on his end when wholly consumed by his fervent passion for a project, you sometimes wonder just how you're still alive with the amount of heart attacks the man has given you.
But despite his... eccentricities, to put it lightly, there are times where you can't quite put a finger on certain expressions he would make when he thinks you're not looking. They're unlike his (once again, to put it very lightly) passionate eyes when rambling to you during mealtimes about an upcoming performance the troupe has; unlike the sheer mania he can exude when something truly sparks his inspiration; unlike the playfully smug grin he would give you when swooping down in dramatic flair to press a long kiss to the back of your palm; unlike the rare darkening of his expression that you cannot help but stiffen at when something or someone in the troupe doesn't quite match his expectations.
No. These ones are... soft. A kind of tenderness and unprecedented longing able to be identified if scrutinised close enough. It was evident in the ghost-like touches he would trail along your skin, as though afraid just a little more force would do irreparable damage. It was evident in the attention to even the most minute details, having everything from clothing to food to the decor suited to preferences you yourself never realised you had. It was evident in the way unadulterated fondness leaked through his tone when his unique terms of affection for you slipped through his lips when all was silent and you were supposed to be asleep.
"My dearest star..."
...Much like now, it would seem.
The bed dips by where your knees slightly bend, hidden under the beige covers. A familiar musky scent surrounds you not long after, and you find yourself involuntarily relaxing at the comfort it brings as your head further burrows into the pillow.
You want to stay awake, even if it's just for a second longer, to hear what he has to say to your less than conscious state. But, oh, his fingers threading through your hair and softly massaging your scalp and the gentle touch of his forehead against yours and the subtle comforting warmth that rolls off his body in waves does little to help you fight the sleep which easily takes over.
Oh, whatever! You'll just try and catch what he has to say next time.
Eventually your breathing evens out, only soft snores now heard within the large shared bedroom. Upon noticing this, Reca cannot stop the fond smile which lifts the corners of his lips, nor can he prevent the softening of his eyes as he continues to gaze at your sleeping form.
"My dearest [Name]," he whispers into the dead of night. Even now, several months later, he still cannot believe his luck to have run into you in that alleyway. It must have been fate which made him heed its call, urging him he would discover something sure to escape that terrible slump plaguing him for weeks on end.
Sure enough, it brought him to something irreplaceable; something he has been searching desperately for.
You.
And, with the tenderest of kisses pressed to your forehead that would put even the most sickening romantics to shame, he murmurs words of promise against your skin, an oath he swears to uphold no matter the obstacles which stand before him.
"In this life, I will ensure you have only the best of endings."
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if you enjoyed this, reblogs and/or comments are greatly appreciated <33
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bettys-redwinesupernova · 29 days ago
Text
I THINK HE KNOWS
drew starkey x fem!reader
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(mood board does NOT depict reader’s appearance!)
SUMMARY: daniel craig introduces his daughter to his co-star drew starkey at the after party for the ‘golden globes,’ and they do more than just hit it off.🫣
based on this ask !! i got a little carried away with this one and i could genuinely write a WHOLE fic with drew x daniel craig’s daughter😫 i have so many ideas for this pairing, so lmk if you wanna see more !! i hope you enjoy this @drewstarrrkey <3
WARNINGS: fluff & smut (18+, MDNI!), cursing, alcohol consumption, flirty!reader, cursing, p in v, fingering, unprotected sex (wrap it before ya tap it😣), switch!drew (mostly dom), like one (?) use of ‘good girl,’ body worship, LOTS of foreplay😝. (lmk if i missed anything!!)
WORD COUNT: 5.2k (i got REALLY carried away😭)
THIRD PERSON +
The energy of the Golden Globes after-party was electric. The clinking of glasses, low hum of laughter, and faint music filled the space. Celebrities mingled under the soft glow of chandeliers, conversations buzzing with excitement about the evening's wins.
Drew Starkey sat at the bar nursing a glass of champagne, still slightly stunned from his earlier win. He'd barely had time to process the moment—his first major nomination and now his first big award.
The crowd was overwhelming, but his co-star, Daniel Craig, had insisted he celebrate properly. Drew watched as Daniel cut through the party with his unmistakable presence, shaking hands, embracing friends, and flashing that rare smile that could light up a room. Behind him, someone followed, and Drew's attention lingered just a little too long.
"Starkey!" Daniel's voice carried above the noise. Drew straightened instinctively, placing his glass back down as Daniel approached.
"Hey!" Drew smiled. "Congrats again. Well deserved, man."
"Thank you. Same to you." Daniel clapped him on the shoulder before stepping to the side. "I want you to meet someone."
Stepping forward with a confident stride was a young woman, poised but relaxed in a way that suggested she belonged in a room like this. Daniel turned to her with an almost affectionate roll of his eyes.
"This is my daughter, Y/N."
Y/N smiled and offered her hand to Drew. "Hi. I've heard so much about you."
Drew shook her hand, his mind scrambling for composure. "You too. I mean—I haven't heard about you in that sense, but your dad's mentioned you. Not in a bad way—uh, I mean—" He stopped, exhaling with a self-deprecating laugh. "Sorry, I'm a bit flustered. It's nice to meet you."
Y/N grinned. "Quite the introduction, Drew."
Daniel raised a brow at them both, clearly amused. "Well, I'll leave you two to it. I see a few friends I need to go bother." He glanced at Drew. "Behave yourself."
Drew let out an awkward laugh. "Of course. Always."
Daniel walked away, disappearing into the crowd. Y/N turned back to Drew, tilting her head slightly as she observed him. "He's very fond of you, you know."
"Is he?" Drew replied, trying to play it cool. "He's great. Working with him was... surreal, honestly."
"I'd imagine. I've seen the movie, of course. You were phenomenal." Her tone was warm, genuine, and Drew found himself smiling at her praise.
"Thank you. That means a lot."
She leaned against the bar, signaling to the bartender for a drink. "You look surprised."
"I guess I just... still don't know how to take compliments," Drew admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. "It's all been a bit overwhelming."
"You shouldn't be so modest. Your performance was stunning. And you've got the trophy to prove it." She shot him a teasing smile. "Don't let it go to your head, though."
Drew laughed, finally feeling himself relax. "I'll try my best. And you—your dad said you're an actress as well? And a model?"
"Here and there. I've done some niche indie films—ones that play in small theatres no one ever goes to." Her voice was light, self-deprecating but playful.
"Niche or not, that's impressive." Drew met her gaze. "What kind of roles?"
Y/N paused as the bartender slid a glass of wine her way. "I guess you could say I play a lot of brooding, lost souls. The ones who always seem to sit by windows and stare out dramatically."
"Ah, very serious. Lots of silent contemplation?"
"Exactly." Y/N laughed softly. "But enough about me. Tell me about Queer. It must've been... intense to film."
"It was." Drew nodded, leaning his elbow on the bar as he turned toward her. "Luca Gaudagnino has this way of making you feel completely vulnerable. It was a challenge, but I trusted him. There's this scene—I'm sure you remember it—where my character completely unravels."
"How could I forget?" Y/N said softly, her eyes locked on his. "You were so raw in that moment. It was almost uncomfortable to watch because it felt so real."
Drew blinked, feeling his ears heat. "That's what Luca wanted. He kept pushing me to 'stop acting,' as he put it. He'd say, 'Feel it. Don't pretend to feel it.' I'd never worked like that before."
"Well, it paid off. Watching you was like watching someone break open right in front of me. Vulnerable, stripped back..." She paused, taking a sip of her wine. "And now here you are, Golden Globe in hand."
Drew looked away, smiling sheepishly. "I'm still processing it."
"You deserve it," Y/N replied firmly. "And no one here is going to let you forget it."
Drew looked at her again, unable to ignore the spark in her gaze. She was bold—not just in what she said, but how she carried herself. It was disarming. "You've got a way with words."
"I'll take that as a compliment." Y/N smiled mischievously. "So tell me, Drew Starkey... how's the fame treating you?"
He groaned playfully, shaking his head. "You're going to make me sound insufferable."
"On the contrary, I think you're handling yourself rather well."
"You say that now," Drew teased. "Talk to me in six months when I've gone completely Hollywood."
"Mm, I don't think that's in your nature." Y/N tilted her head thoughtfully. "You seem far too grounded for that."
"You don't know me yet," Drew countered.
"Well, I'm a very good judge of character. Comes with the territory of being Daniel Craig's daughter—lots of egos to sift through."
Drew raised his brows, amused. "Is that right?"
"Absolutely. I'm rarely wrong." She gave him a sly look. "And my read on you so far is: humble, charming, and maybe a little too hard on yourself."
Drew chuckled, caught off guard. "You're bold."
"Life's too short not to be."
Drew shook his head with a small smile. "And what's your read on yourself?"
Y/N leaned in slightly, her voice dropping just enough to feel conspiratorial. "That would spoil the fun, wouldn't it?"
Drew swallowed, the teasing lilt in her voice setting him slightly off balance. There was a beat of silence between them, the kind that crackled with unspoken tension. He cleared his throat, reaching for his champagne. "You're a mystery, Y/N."
"And you're still a little flustered," she teased, her grin widening. "Do I make you nervous, Drew?"
"Maybe." Drew gave her a crooked smile, holding her gaze. "But I think you like that."
Y/N laughed, the sound light and rich. "I do. I'm not afraid to admit it."
Drew shook his head in disbelief. "You're something else."
"So I've been told." She took another sip of wine, her expression softening just a touch. "But really—what's next for you? After all this?"
Drew shrugged, glancing around the room as if the answer might be hidden somewhere among the guests. "I don't know. This feels like such a huge moment, you know? I almost don't want to think about what's next. I just want to enjoy this."
"As you should." Y/N nodded approvingly. "Don't let anyone rush you."
"I won't." Drew paused, meeting her eyes again. "But... I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little scared of what comes after. What if I can't live up to it?"
"You will," Y/N said softly, her tone sincere. "You've got the talent, Drew. The rest will follow."
Drew studied her for a moment, his chest feeling strangely warm. "You're very good at this."
"At what?"
"Making people feel seen."
Y/N smiled, her expression unreadable. "Maybe you just needed someone to see you tonight."
Drew felt his heart skip, the weight of her words settling between them. Before he could respond, Y/N placed her empty glass on the bar.
"Come on," she said, standing. "You're far too interesting to spend the whole night glued to this bar stool."
"Where are we going?" Drew asked, standing to follow her.
Y/N looked over her shoulder with a mischievous smile. "You'll just have to follow me."
And he did. Without hesitation. A “Yes, ma’am,” slipping from his lips.
Drew followed Y/N as she led him away from the bar, weaving effortlessly through the crowd. She moved with a sort of practiced ease, as if she'd spent her whole life in rooms like this—grand, glittering, and full of famous faces. Drew, still buzzing from the champagne and the residual adrenaline of the evening, was mesmerized.
"I'm dying of curiosity here, where exactly are we going?" Drew asked, his voice tinged with amusement as they turned down a quieter hallway leading away from the main party.
"Somewhere a little less chaotic," Y/N replied, glancing back at him. "Unless you'd rather keep bumping elbows with half of Hollywood."
"No complaints here," Drew said, matching her steps. "I think I've shaken enough hands tonight to last me the rest of the year."
Y/N pushed open a door at the end of the hall, revealing a small terrace overlooking the city. The night air was cool, crisp against their skin as they stepped outside. The noise of the party dulled behind them, replaced by the distant hum of Los Angeles and the quiet rustling of trees in the breeze.
"Better?" Y/N asked, turning to face him.
Drew exhaled, his shoulders relaxing as he looked out over the skyline. "Much better. Thanks."
Y/N leaned against the railing, watching him with an unreadable expression. "You looked like you needed an escape."
"I guess I did." Drew joined her, leaning beside her, their arms nearly brushing. "It's a lot, you know? I'm grateful—don't get me wrong—but... I don't think I'm cut out for the whole schmoozing thing."
"Most people aren't. They just pretend they are." Y/N's lips curled into a small smile. "Besides, you've already done the hard part tonight. The rest is noise."
Drew glanced at her, the city lights reflecting in her eyes. "You're good at this—reading people."
She shrugged lightly, her tone playful but laced with truth. "It's my party trick."
"Anything else I should know about you?" Drew teased. "Other hidden talents?"
"Plenty," she replied with a grin and a cheeky wink. "But I'm not about to give them all away at once. That would ruin the mystery."
Drew shook his head with a laugh, tucking his hands into his pockets. "You're impossible."
"I get that a lot," she said, unfazed. "But you haven't run off yet, have you?"
"No," Drew admitted, his smile softening. "I haven't."
Y/N's gaze lingered on him for a moment before she looked back out at the city. "Can I ask you something?"
"Sure."
"Did you ever think you'd end up here?" She gestured vaguely to the world around them. "Holding a Golden Globe, being the name on everyone's lips?"
Drew was quiet for a beat, choosing his words carefully. "I don't think it ever felt real enough to imagine. I wanted it, of course—I worked for it—but this? This feels like someone else's life."
"And yet, here you are."
"Here I am," he echoed, looking at her. "What about you? You've grown up in all of this. Does it ever lose its shine?"
Y/N's expression faltered, just for a moment, as if the question touched on something deeper. "Sometimes," she admitted. "It's easy to feel like you're just a part of the machinery—another face in a sea of them. But then you meet someone who reminds you why you love it, why it's worth it."
Drew tilted his head slightly, his curiosity piqued. "Is that why you act? Because you love it?"
"Because I can't not do it," Y/N said simply. "Even when it's thankless, even when no one's watching... I need it."
Drew understood that. It resonated deep within him—the need to create, to express, to push boundaries for reasons that weren't always tangible.
"I get that," he murmured. "The best moments are the ones no one else sees. The ones you do for yourself."
Y/N turned to face him fully, her eyes sharp and intent. "Exactly. And that's what makes what you did in Queer so powerful. It didn't feel performative. It felt real, like you gave a part of yourself away for it."
Drew swallowed, her words hitting him harder than he expected. "I'm honoured. That's... the best compliment I've ever gotten."
"It's true," she said softly. "And for what it's worth, I think you're just getting started."
Drew looked at her, something shifting between them in the quiet. He felt seen—more than that, he felt understood. Y/N Craig, with her razor-sharp wit and unwavering confidence, had peeled back his layers in a way no one else had managed all night.
"You really don't hold back, do you?" Drew said, his voice low.
Y/N smirked, stepping closer. "Why should I? Life's too short for subtlety."
Drew's breath hitched as the space between them narrowed. She was close enough now that he could catch the faintest trace of her perfume—something heady and elegant that suited her perfectly.
"You're dangerous," Drew said, his voice a little unsteady.
Y/N arched a brow, clearly amused. "Am I?"
"Yeah." Drew's lips curved into a small smile. "The kind of person who makes you forget to play it safe."
Y/N tilted her head, her eyes locking with his. "And do you always play it safe, Drew Starkey?"
Drew hesitated for just a second before answering. "Not tonight."
Y/N's smile widened, a knowing glint in her eyes. She reached up, her fingers brushing the lapel of his suit jacket. "Good."
The air crackled between them, thick with unspoken possibilities. Drew could feel his pulse quicken, every sense heightened as Y/N held his gaze. She was testing him, waiting to see what he'd do.
And for once, Drew didn't think—he just acted.
"Do you want to get out of here?" he asked, his voice low and rough.
Y/N's smile was slow and deliberate. "I thought you'd never ask."
Drew grinned, a mix of nerves and excitement flickering across his face as Y/N tugged him by the hand, leading him back through the terrace door. The pair slipped back into the hallway unnoticed, the music and chatter of the afterparty drowning out their hasty footsteps.
"Are we seriously sneaking our way out right now?" Drew whispered, though the grin he wore betrayed any hesitation.
"Unless you'd rather stay and talk to George Clooney about his favorite vineyards," Y/N teased, looking back at him with a mischievous smile. "Then we need to make haste!"
Drew huffed a quiet laugh. "Okay, fair point. Let's go."
They moved quickly, dodging small clusters of guests and waitstaff like a pair of teenagers sneaking out of school. Every time their eyes met, a fit of laughter threatened to spill out of them.
"Act natural," Y/N mock-coached as they passed one of the party coordinators.
"Yeah, because that's going well," Drew shot back, trying to suppress his smirk.
Finally, they pushed through a side exit and found themselves in the cool night air, away from the golden haze of the afterparty. The parking area was quiet, save for a valet who barely looked up as Y/N called for a car.
"God, I feel like we just got away with murder," Drew muttered, running a hand through his hair as he stood beside her.
Y/N grinned up at him, her cheeks flushed. "Feels kind of good, doesn't it?"
He chuckled, shaking his head. "Yeah... yeah, it really does."
The car pulled up, and Y/N wasted no time climbing into the backseat. Drew followed, sliding in beside her and shutting the door. The silence in the car was loaded, broken only by the faint hum of the radio and the distant sounds of the city.
"Your hotel, I assume?" Y/N asked, glancing at him.
"Yeah." Drew cleared his throat, suddenly feeling the weight of what they were doing hit him. He glanced at her and added softly, "If that's okay."
Y/N gave him a teasing look. "Wouldn't be here if it wasn't, would I?"
Drew felt the heat rise to his cheeks, and he covered it with a laugh. "Right. Fair point."
The ride to the hotel felt like a blur, the two of them making light conversation as they both tried to ignore the electric undercurrent running between them. When the car finally pulled up to Drew's hotel, he shot Y/N a nervous glance.
"You sure about this?" he asked quietly.
Y/N's lips twitched into a smirk as she leaned closer, her voice low and teasing. "You're not getting cold feet, are you?"
"Definitely not," Drew said quickly, earning another quiet laugh from her.
They hurried through the lobby—heads down, hands brushing but never fully touching. Drew felt like his heart was pounding in his ears as they reached the elevator. The moment the doors slid shut, Y/N let out a giggle, biting her lower lip.
"We look so suspicious right now," she whispered.
"You look suspicious," Drew shot back with a grin. "I look like someone trying not to have a heart attack."
She rolled her eyes playfully, stepping closer to him. "Relax, Golden Globe winner. No one's paying attention to us."
"That's the problem," Drew muttered under his breath, earning another soft laugh from her.
The elevator dinged, and they stepped onto Drew's floor. He fumbled briefly with the keycard as Y/N watched, clearly entertained by how flustered he'd become.
"Need help?" she teased.
"I've got it," Drew replied quickly, finally getting the door open. He held it for her as she stepped inside, and he followed, shutting it behind them.
The hotel room was simple and sleek, the lights dim as Drew tossed his keycard onto the desk. He turned to find Y/N standing near the window, looking out at the glittering cityscape. She turned to face him, her expression softer now, though still full of that familiar mischief.
But it was like something had switched in the air. Drew leaning back against the door as he studied her.
"So," he began, his voice quiet but laced with an edge that made her stomach twist, "I bet you think you're calling the shots tonight?"
Y/N raised an eyebrow, crossing her arms over her chest. "I mean, I guess we'll see who's running this show, won't we?"
Drew pushed off the door, taking a slow step toward her. His movements were deliberate, almost predatory, and Y/N found herself instinctively taking a small step back. But she wasn't about to let him see her falter. She leaned forward slightly, her lips quirking into a smirk.
"You walk like you own the place," she said, her tone teasing. "But I bet you're all talk."
Drew stopped just inches away from her, his breath warm against her skin. He lifted a hand, brushing a strand of hair away from her face, his touch surprisingly gentle for someone who seemed so intent on dominating the situation.
"Careful, Y/N," he warned softly, his voice almost a whisper. "You might be surprised at what I'm capable of."
His fingers trailed down her neck, and she shivered despite herself. What is this? she wondered, her earlier confidence beginning to waver. There was something magnetic about him, something that pulled her in despite her best efforts to maintain control.
"Or maybe," she countered, tilting her chin up defiantly, "you're just trying to scare me."
Drew's lips twitched into a smile, but there was no warmth in it. "Maybe I am," he admitted, his voice dropping lower. "But why don't we find out?"
Before she could respond, his hands were on her hips, pulling her closer until their bodies pressed together. Y/N gasped softly, her pulse quickening as his proximity overwhelmed her senses. His lips were so close to hers, his breath mingling with hers, and she couldn't help but tilt her face upward, drawn to him like a moth to a flame.
"You're playing a dangerous game," he murmured, his voice rough and intimate. "And I'm not one for playing games."
Y/N swallowed hard, suddenly very aware of how much taller and stronger he was than her. But she wasn't about to back down. "Good," she said, forcing herself to meet his gaze. "Because I like a challenge."
Drew's eyes darkened, and without warning, he dipped his head, capturing her lips in a kiss that was anything but gentle. It was commanding, urgent, and left no room for doubt about who was in charge. Y/N's hands flew to his shoulders, gripping tightly as she tried to steady herself against the wave of desire that washed over her.
His tongue traced the seam of her lips, demanding entry, and she parted them instinctively, allowing him access. The kiss deepened, grew more intense, and Y/N felt her knees weaken. Drew held her firmly, his hands sliding up her sides to cup her face, angling her head to deepen the connection.
When he finally pulled away, Y/N was breathless, her cheeks flushed and her chest rising and falling rapidly. She blinked up at him, dazed and disoriented, and realized with a jolt that she'd completely underestimated him.
"As wonderful as that was," Drew said, his voice husky and raw. "I think I need to go slower. Test your limits."
Y/N's heart pounded in her chest as she stared up at him, realisation dawning. He's not bluffing, she thought, her earlier confidence faltering. Drew was lethal, charming, and utterly in control, and she had walked right into his trap.
"What do you want from me?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
Drew's lips curved into a wicked smile as he leaned in, his breath hot against her ear. "Everything."
His hand slid from her hip to the small of her back, pressing her closer against him. The heat between them was electric, a palpable tension that threatened to ignite at any moment.
Y/N's breath came in short bursts as she tilted her head up, her lips parted in anticipation. He's not going to kiss me, she thought, not yet. But the way his eyes darkened, the way his fingers flexed against her skin, told her she was wrong. He was going to do exactly what he wanted, and she was going to let him.
"Tell me what you want," he murmured, his lips hovering just inches from hers. "Tell me how much you like this."
She hesitated for a split second, but only a split second. Her boldness was ingrained, a survival mechanism honed by years of attention and expectation. "I like it," she said, her voice steady despite the storm raging inside her. "I like that you're taking control."
Drew's smile was slow, predatory. "Good girl," he said, the words soft but laced with authority. He kissed her then, a deep, bruising kiss that left no room for doubt. His tongue swept into her mouth, demanding, exploring, claiming. Y/N melted into him, her hands gripping his shoulders for balance as the world around her dissolved into sensation.
When he finally pulled away, they were both breathless. Drew stared down at her, his blue eyes gleaming with something that made her stomach twist. "You're not in control here, sweetheart," he said, his tone conversational but firm. "Not anymore."
Y/N swallowed hard, her earlier confidence faltering. He's right, she realised. I walked into this thinking I could handle him, but he's handling me. And God, it was intoxicating.
Drew didn't wait for her response. Instead, he turned her gently, positioning her with her back to him. Her heart raced as she felt his body press against hers, his chest warm and solid against her spine. His hand cupped her breast, thumb brushing over her nipple through the fabric of her dress. She gasped, arching into his touch.
"Do you trust me?" he asked, his voice rumbling against her ear.
She nodded quickly, too caught up in the sensations to form words.
"Good," he said, his grip tightening momentarily before he released her. Y/N blinked, confused, as Drew stepped back. He moved to the bed, sitting down and leaning back on his elbows, his legs stretched out in front of him. His gaze was intense, predatory, as he watched her.
"Take off your dress," he said simply.
The command hit her like a bolt of lightning. Y/N hesitated, her hands moving instinctively to the zipper at the back of her gown. She glanced at Drew, expecting... something. A smile, maybe, or a reassuring word. But his expression remained unchanged, a mask of calm dominance.
He's serious, she thought, her pulse quickening. He wants me to do this for him.
Slowly, deliberately, she began to unzip her dress. The fabric slid down her shoulders, pooling at her hips. She shrugged it off, letting it fall to the floor in a heap. Beneath it, she wore only a lace bra and matching panties, the delicate garments doing little to conceal her arousal.
Drew's eyes roamed over her body, lingering on the curve of her waist, the swell of her breasts, the slight tremble in her thighs. "Beautiful," he murmured, his voice thick with approval. "But not enough."
Y/N's brow furrowed. "What—"
"Shh," he interrupted, raising a hand to silence her. "Don't talk. Just listen."
Her breath caught in her throat as Drew leaned forward, his movements fluid and precise. He reached out, his fingers brushing against the strap of her bra. With a flick of his wrist, he sent it sliding down her arm. Her nipples tightened immediately, peaking under his scrutiny.
"Perfect," he said, his voice a low purr. He cupped her breast in his hand, squeezing gently. Y/N bit her lip to stifle a moan, her legs trembling beneath her.
Drew's free hand reached for the waistband of her panties, tugging them downward until they clung to her hips. He paused there, his fingers tracing the edge of the fabric before hooking his thumbs into the sides and pulling them down her legs.
Y/N stood before him completely exposed, her cheeks burning with embarrassment and arousal. Drew's gaze was relentless, unapologetic, as he took in every inch of her.
"Turn around," he commanded, his voice leaving no room for argument.
She obeyed, her movements stiff with nervousness. When she faced away from him, Drew's hands returned to her body, one stroking down her spine while the other traced the curve of her ass.
"So beautiful," he whispered, his breath hot against her skin. He pressed a kiss to the nape of her neck, his lips lingering as his hands explored her body with increasing boldness.
Y/N's knees nearly buckled beneath her. This is happening, she thought, her brain struggling to keep up with the intensity of the moment. He's really doing this.
Without warning, Drew spun her around and pushed her backward onto the bed. Y/N landed with a soft thud, her heart pounding as she looked up at him. Drew loomed over her, his expression dark and commanding.
"Spread your legs," he ordered, his voice sharp and clipped.
Y/N hesitated, her mind racing. Is this what I want? The question flashed through her mind, but the answer was already there, buried beneath the haze of desire clouding her judgment.
She spread her legs, her breathing shallow and uneven. Drew's eyes flicked down, noting her readiness with a smirk.
"Good girl," he said, the words dripping with approval. He knelt between her thighs, his fingers skimming the inside of her knee before moving upward. Y/N's breath hitched as his touch neared her core, her body tensing in anticipation.
And then, quite suddenly, he stopped.
"Wait," he said, his voice firm.
Y/N blinked up at him, confusion and frustration warring within her. "What?" she managed to whisper.
Drew's smile was wicked, almost cruel. "I need to hear you say it."
"Say what?"
His fingers pressed against her inner thigh, applying just enough pressure to make her squirm. "Tell me what you want," he demanded. "Tell me how much you need this."
Y/N's cheeks flushed crimson, her confidence faltering under his unrelenting gaze. "I... I don't know," she stammered, her voice barely audible.
Drew's expression hardened, his hand withdrawing from her thigh. "Then we're done here."
"No!" she cried, desperation clawing at her throat. "Please, Drew, I—"
"Say it," he interrupted, his voice a low growl.
She hesitated, her pride warring with her need. But she needed this, more than she cared to admit. "Please," she whispered, her voice breaking. "I... I need you to fuck me."
At her admission, Drew's control snapped. His hands and lips were everywhere, leaving no part of her untouched, no moment unexplored.
And within a split-second, he pushed into her, filling her completely. She gasped, her body adjusting to his size, her muscles tightening around him. Drew began to move, his rhythm slow and steady, building the tension once more. He watched her face intently, reading every twitch and moan, adjusting his movements to maximise her pleasure. It was as if he could feel every sensation she was experiencing, as if they were connected in a way that went beyond the physical.
He leaned down, capturing her mouth in another bruising kiss. His hand found her clit, his thumb circling it in time with his thrusts.
The cacophony of sounds filled the room: slick skin connecting, Y/N's breathless whimpers and cries of pure pleasure, Drew's soft moans. But to them it sounded like a symphony; a truly bewitching one.
"Y/N," Drew said her name like a prayer, his voice ragged with volatile emotions. "Look at me."
She obeyed, meeting his gaze as tears of ecstasy blurred her vision. This was it, she realised. This was what she'd been missing. The raw, unfiltered connection, the trust, the surrender.
"Don't look away," he commanded, his voice fierce but tender. "Stay with me."
She nodded, her breathing shallow as she clung to him, her body tense with anticipation. And then, as if on cue, her climax hit her like a tidal wave, her entire body convulsing with pleasure as she screamed his name.
Drew followed soon after, burying his face in the crook of her neck as he poured himself into her, his body shuddering with release. For a moment, they lay there in silence, their hearts pounding in sync.
"So," she said quietly, breaking the silence. "Not a bad way to celebrate your first Golden Globe win, is it?"
Drew let out a soft laugh, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "Not bad at all."
Y/N grinned, lifting her head to look at him. "Good. Because I plan on reminding you about this night for years."
Drew rolled his eyes, though he was smiling. "You're never going to let me live this down, are you?"
"Not a chance."
Drew shook his head, pulling her closer. "You're the worst."
"And yet, here we are," Y/N teased, settling back against him.
Drew couldn't argue with that. As he lay there, listening to her quiet breathing and staring up at the ceiling, he couldn't help but think that this was, without a doubt, the best night of his life.
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(dividers by @kodaswrld !!)
betty’s notes ౨ৎ ⋆。˚
i had SO much fun writing this request and i REALLY got carried away XD i hope this wasn’t too long, and was exactly what you wanted my lovely :) request are going to be open for the next 24 hours so get some in if you have anymore everyone !! <3
thinking of starting a tag list if anybody’s interested? as always, hearts and reblogs are always appreciated <3
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afterglowsainz · 9 months ago
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Hey can I get a jealous Jude x female reader. Nothing too toxic lol l, it’s just some guys hitting y/n up on social media and somehow Jude sees the DMs and gets a little jealous. Then his petty self goes and posts a picture of him and his girlfriend on her ig or something petty like responds back with a “she’s busy bro”. Thanks 🫶🏻
jealousy | jude bellingham
obsessed with this concept already !!
summary: while you're getting ready to go out on a date with your boyfriend, he accidentally sees some dms he doesn't like and decides to do something about it
warnings: none
word count: 738
a/n: boring title booo i know i know i couldn't think of anything better :( i do hope you like the one shot tho it was fun to write about jealous jude <3
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you were getting ready to go out on a date with jude while he was laying on your bed waiting for you. his phone was charging somewhere in the living room so you gave him yours to play a game so he doesn’t get bored. you were putting on your makeup while singing along to your playlist while he was building some villages or whatever it was that they do on clash royale. however, jude got distracted when an instagram dm pop up at the top of your phone, it was from this formula 1 driver that he knew was always liking your pictures, he didn’t knew he was dming you as well. he thought about opening the message, but he didn’t want to invade your privacy like that, so he simply looked at you.
“someone dm you.” he says.
his voice took you out of your little world and you place your gaze on him thought the mirror you were applying your makeup on.
“who?”
“lando norris.” he reads the name like he didn’t knew already.
“what does it say?” you hide a laugh and continue with your makeup routine.
jude opens the message and reads it out loud. it was obvious he was hitting on you by replying to a story you had posted earlier that day when you went to brunch with your friends and you felt cute.
“are you gonna answer?” he asks again, hints of jealousy on voice.
“not really, no.” you answer and go back to singing along and applying mascara on.
when jude goes back to the screen on your phone his thumb accidentally swipes left and your whole inbox is completely exposed to him. he didn’t meant to do that, but it really was an accident and he couldn’t help but see now that it was there, only he wished he didn’t have.
some of your dms were just conversations with your friends, but a lot of them were just guys replying to your stories and hitting on you, which made him even more jealous than before. you never replied to them, going as far as deleting some of the messages you received, but since you hadn’t checked your instagram since that afternoon a lot of dms from different guys complimenting you on your story were there for jude to find.
he frowns at the phone and takes a look at you, completely oblivious while doing your eyeliner. his eyes go back to the screen and he starts looking up some pictures that you took the week before of you two.
“do you mind if i post one of those pictures you took of us last week?” he asks out of nowhere. “so i can repost it on my story.” he clarifies.
you frown a bit confused because this is the first time he has asked you something like this, but after him seeing the other guy’s dm and feeling a bit jealous you connected the dots and smile amused.
“sure.” you say.
he nods and went to post a story with the two of you looking definitely like the couple you were. he spend a few seconds thinking about a good caption, landing on a simple “my boyfriend❤️”, very straight to the point. he also tagged himself big enough for everyone to see and posted the picture, a satisfied smile on his face.
when you were done with your makeup and ready to go, you approached him and sat on his lap, your phone still in his hand.
“let me see the picture.” you smiled. he shows you the story and you rolled your eyes, a bit amused at his possessiveness. “was that really necessary?” you point at the text and he just shrugs.
“i just feel like there’s a lot of people that don't know we’re together, you know? just wanna put it out there.” you nod, fighting the smile on your face and putting your arms around him.
“is that so?” you tease him, getting closer to him if that was even possible.
“yeah, lots of guys on your dms.” he confess. “they liked your selfie earlier.”
“hmm.” you answer. “i wouldn’t know about that, i only like one guy.” a treacherous smile takes over his lips and you take the opportunity to kiss him. “wanna go? we’ll be late to dinner.”
jude just nods and gets out of bed, never dropping your hand for a second.
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foldingfittedsheets · 4 months ago
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Sometime around eight or nine my best friend and I learned about hickies. I suspect he’s the one who learned it and shared it with me. We were both utterly fascinated and on a dare I sucked mightily on my own upper arm to give myself one.
This was great fun, self made bruise. Hilarious.
But looking at the mark later I thought that perhaps it might be best to bandage it lest any questions crop up. My parents were often suspicious of my friendship with the boy across the street anyway, and I had a vague inkling that perhaps hickies might fall under the vaguely looming topic of Sex.
So I put a bandaid on it.
I’m not sure if my mom was suspicious regardless but as I was getting out of the shower a day later she popped in and spotted my unbandaged mark. The handle was flown off. She was a creature made only of yelling. She demanded to know where it had come from.
I told her I’d done it myself. She scoffed and said I couldn’t even reach that place on my arm. I put my mouth over the mark. She escalated her volume to ask why I’d hidden it if it were nothing and I gestured vaguely to encompass her irate direction. She did not care for that or believe me, but the discussion was tabled.
Tension simmered in the house. A few days later it was a weekend and I asked if I could stay over at my friend’s house. To the bafflement of my friend and I our parents were increasingly hesitant to allow this childhood bonding. If he’d been a girl there would be no issue but he was a boy.
It didn’t seem to matter that we were both children and that my menstrual cycle would not arrive for several more years. Or that a boy was safer from me than many female friends would be on later sleepovers. The constant jokes we both loathed from both sets of parents that someday we’d get married now seemed ominous.
There were phone calls. The sleepover was reluctantly agreed to. I packed up my pillowcase with all the stuff I’d need for the night and headed toward the door. My father stopped me.
He insisted I sit down. I sat.
He stuttered, “Now. You’re like. Ah. A flower. And your friend is a- uh. A bee. And bees will sting you- uhm- if they can so you need to use- uh- protection- from stinging.”
I was nine. I had no fucking idea what was going on and my dad was not really helping. As he rambled I slowly started to intuit that this was about S-E-X and was very probably the result of my hickey but I had no idea how to make him stop talking.
I will never understand why it was my father giving this talk in the first place. My mother had previously worked in a sex shop and phrases like, “Make sure to use lube, you don’t wanna rub it raw down there,” were a common part of my youth. My father meanwhile turned red as a beet and stammered at any mention of Sex.
He finished his mortifying and confusing talk with, “Don’t tell your friend about this talk.”
The door closed to my friends room and I immediately told him about it.
We were both utterly horrified at the thought of each other as anything more than frenemies. We fought, we played games, we set off fireworks. Why did adults need to taint that?
But tainted it was.
Both sets of parents continued to radiate an unwholesome suspicion about our friendship now and we never brought up the topic of sleepovers ever again. It is a source of tremendous amusement that despite all their worry over our relationship my friend and I both turned out gay.
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satoruxx · 10 months ago
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pairing: toji fushiguro x reader | 1.2k words summary: boyfriend!toji again, fluff, soft!toji, grumpy x sunshine, that obligatory sick fic, bickering, affectionate scolding, pet names, this is very self-indulgent !! rheya's note: had this written for so long and never posted it oops !! but yeah resident grump worrying over his fav what's new?
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toji knows something is off as soon as he steps into his apartment. he comes to the conclusion almost immediately, because he isn’t greeted like he normally is when he comes home.
normally, he’ll push the door open and you’ll trip over yourself as you stand from the couch, a giddy smile on your face as you jump into his arms. and being the asshole that he is, toji never hesitates to grumble about it, clicking his tongue as he says things along the lines of “dammit kid one day i won’t catch you” or “jeez baby let me get in the house” or something similar. but despite all that his hands will still be attached to you, rubbing your back as he smothers an amused chuckle against your hair.
but not today. today he’s greeted by quiet and emptiness—a clear lack of you. he had opened the door ready to catch you in his arms, but all he can do is raise a brow at the silence. as much as he normally complains about it, this absence makes his gut churn. he pushes all that aside, more concerned than anything as he drops his jacket onto the couch and heads for the bedroom.
toji is nothing if not observant, paranoid as his eyes dart from corner to corner of the small apartment. it’s ingrained into him—this fear that his past will come back to haunt him and take you away in the most brutal way imaginable. but he tries to ignore that, continuing to head down the hall until he pushes the bedroom door open.
his shoulders drop in relief, seeing you laying on your stomach, face buried in the pillows, and he lets out a sigh. he sees you shift a little, signaling that you’re awake, so he takes a few steps forward.
toji climbs onto the bed and lays down next to you, dropping a heavy arm over your back. “what’s wrong?”
“don’t feel good,” you answer back. toji’s brows furrow, and he manages to push his free palm against your forehead. heat pulses against his skin, and his frown deepens.
“the fuck did you do to yourself?” he asks, not unkindly but still stern—you can only glare at him hazily.
“it’s not my fault!”
“uh huh,” toji rolls his eyes, threading his fingers through your sweaty hair and pushing it back from your forehead. “so me telling you to put some layers on when you go out in the cold has nothing to do with this?”
you huff, face heating under his pointed stare, and all you can do is shove his hand away, before pathetically burying your face into the sheets again. “shut up.”
“don’t be a brat.” toji lets out a quiet chuckle, shaking his head indulgently. “it’s your fault for not listening to me.”
“if you’re just gonna lecture me, go away,” you complain, cheek pressed into the pillow. toji snorts, though his hand rubs what you assume to be soothing circles on your back.
“who’s gonna make sure your dumbass doesn’t get into more trouble?”
another indignant huff, and toji only chuckles. “alright c’mon kid. let’s get you in better shape, yeah?” he grunts, looping his arm around your waist and tugging you up. you immediately protest, whining out a plethora of curses attached to his name, and he rolls his eyes. “okay, alright shut up.”
he maneuvers your body into sitting position, leaning you up against the pillows and pulling the blankets up with furrowed brows—meticulous in a way that he is only with very few things.
“you eat anything today?” he asks, still fussing over the blankets, and you gulp quietly. one look and toji’s frown grows deeper. “kid.” the word comes out stressed, like a scolding, and you wince.
“i didn’t feel like it,” you groan, trying not to wilt under his pointed glare.
“don’t care,” he huffs. “your body needs energy, stupid.”
“rude,” you mutter, crossing your arms and toji rolls his eyes.
“whine all you want—“ he stands up, rolling his neck until he hears a satisfying crack. “—still gonna make you eat something. soup okay?”
you don’t want to admit how tempting it sounds, so with an unrelenting amount of stubbornness you glare at him. “fine.”
his lips quirk upward into a smug little grin, and you try to refrain from throwing something at him. he pats your leg. “alright.”
he heads into the kitchen, leaving you to your thoughts. you hear the occasional sounds of cooking and utensils and before long, the comforting smell of soup wafts through the apartment. you try not to show toji how your mouth is watering when he walks back in, a bowl in his palm.
“here,” he grunts, propping a knee onto the bed that dips under his weight. “eat up, doll.”
you sigh, already hating the feeling of the cool sheets when you move even slightly to reach for it.
“you gonna make me spoon feed you?” toji’s brow quirks—smug, and obviously amused.
“i can do it myself thank you—” you try to take the bowl from him with a glare but he raises it out of your reach and clicks his tongue.
“will y’just let me do this one thing for you, jeez,” he complains, glaring down his nose at you.
you cross your arms with a huff, tone going slightly apologetic. “i feel bad—”
“why the fuck do you feel bad?” he asks sharply, eyes narrowed and confused and caught off guard like you’ve said the most out of pocket thing.
“because—” you stress, throwing your hands up miserably. “you were out on these crazy missions—probably tired as hell. and instead of relaxing you have to come home and take care of me because i was too stupid to look after myself.”
toji groans, putting the bowl on the bedside table before sitting on the bed completely. “kid,” he says emphatically, taking your face in his palms firmly. “how many times do i need to tell you this? i don’t mind lookin’ out for you.”
“yeah but—”
“no shut up,” he snaps, an exasperated sigh escaping his lips. “you always worry about bothering me or inconveniencing me or some other crap like that. i’m telling you—don’t.”
his thumbs gently press into the apples of your cheeks, and your lips part under his pointed gaze.
“i like doin’ shit for you, okay? ‘n takin’ care of you when you’re sick? that’s nothing.” his lips tug into a lopsided smirk. “who else is gonna look out for you anyway?”
you purse your lips, throat going tight because toji rarely talks like this—so honestly open. and though you’re sure that many people out there would say he’s harsh and mean and not good for you, it’s things like this that prove how wrong they are.
“what’s wrong? did i break your brain?” toji asks, reaching up to knock his knuckle against your head, and you huff out a laugh, pushing his arm away.
“shut up,” you mutter, falling into his chest heavily. he chuckles, low and throaty as he pats your back.
“you up for eating now?” you can feel him reaching for the bowl, and you smile against him, pressing your face further into his warmth because toji will always be nothing but safe for you.
“in a minute,” you answer, looping your arms around his waist. he sighs, shaking his head but he doesn’t say anything else.
but you think you can feel him smile against your hair as he drops a chaste kiss to your forehead—you don’t tell him that though.
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madwomansapologist · 15 days ago
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ㅤㅤㅤㅤ༘⋆ rizz? oh, you mean my autism?
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★彡 synopsis: jjk boyfriends' ways of loving an autistic reader.
characters: satoru gojo, suguru geto, kento nanami, choso kamo, toji fushiguro, hajime kashimo.
bella's note: my new year's resolution? to be way more self-indulgent!
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.ᐟ.ᐟ KENTO 'QUIZ TIME' NANAMI
The first time it happened, Kento assumed you were way too focused on work to cook something before you were about to faint. The second time, maybe you were distracted. From then on, it was a pattern Kento couldn’t unsee.
Arms shaking as you cook. Changing the shower temperature when your skin is burning hot. Only washing your glasses when they are so dusty he could draw on them. Waking up on the middle of the night to use the bathroom.
You only listen to your needs when your body screams.
THIS PACKAGE INCLUDES: “Do you need a drink?” — “Have you eaten anything? That doesn’t count.” — “Want me to close the curtains?” — “Come clean your glasses with me. I could clean yours, but you would need to clean mine. That’s what I thought.” — “Did you pay your bills this month?” — “Have you watched that movie you told me about?” — “Are you going to bed or I’ll have to start undressing? Oh, so now you hear me?”
.ᐟ.ᐟ CHOSO 'ACCIDENTAL MIME' KAMO
Choso would’ve never noticed if you hadn’t got mad at him. Mocking you? of course he was not! That’s so mean, Choso would never do that to someone he loves.
You have this habit. Of repeating words or phrases others use. Choso thought it was sweet. It showed that you were paying attention to every conversation. He started doing the same for you to know that he was listening, too.
Choso would’ve never understood if it wasn’t for Yuji. Echolalia. You weren’t doing it on purpose. It was automatic. What he saw as a habit was something you have no control over. When Choso started doing the same, you thought it was his way of saying “stop that, you’re bothering me.”
Once Choso explained himself, it was your turn to think it was a sweet habit.
THIS PACKAGE INCLUDES: “Sorry, sir, I didn’t mean to.” — “Choso, you’re very beautiful. Wait.” — “Can you shut up? Sorry.” — “Do you want to go out? I would love to.” — “Fuck that. Hey, Yuji, don’t use those words.” — “Babe? Yes?”
.ᐟ.ᐟ SUGURO 'SOCIAL CLUES TRANSLATOR' GETO
People, most often than not, will say things without actually saying them. The first time the meaning behind someone’s word were completely lost once they reached your ears, Suguru thought it was amusing. But then he understood some think it’s only logical to blame you for not getting what they chose not to say.
Arguing with someone unwilling to change their ways is pointless. If they don’t want to communicate with others, so be it. Suguru would pity them for wasting their chance of knowing you, but he prefers when you spend your time with him.
In important events, Suguru will tell you what to expect. Out with friends, he may warn you about someone not being very happy. Oh, the countless times Suguru was the one to explain that “no, honey, they didn’t mean it literally.”
Suguru would rather not being called tutorial mascot by his partner, but if you’re happy… so be it.
THIS PACKAGE INCLUDES: “Hyperbole.” — “I think that was her polite way of spitting on his face. It gave me chills.” — “I also don’t know what he meant by that.” — “She’s definitely lying.” — “Not literally.” — “Shit. Satoru will ask me to give a speech. You will pretend to be sick? ... I love you.”
.ᐟ.ᐟ HAJIME 'TELL ME MORE' KASHIMO
Hajime WILL know about all your special interests. You have no say in this matter. He wants to know everything about you that there is to know. After all, what is love if not seeing the other and accepting them entirely?
He prefers to do it while he trains. Hajime will practice his techniques with your voice to sooth his muscles. Don’t matter what is on your mind, he wants to hear it all. A specific actress, some movie you saw, penguins? Lovely, keep going.
It's endearing the way you know so much about what you love. Makes Hajime want to ask you what you know about him. Just to check.
THIS PACKAGE INCLUDES: "No, no. Please, keep going." — "And that was created when?" — "Your voice is enchanting." — "How did you discovered that?" — "I think, when I was young, I read a book that mentioned this." — "Talk to me. I want to listen."
.ᐟ.ᐟ TOJI 'HUMAN FURNACE' FUSHIGURO
Toji knows how to read someone. It's useful. If he can understand their desires and fears, then he knows what to expect. When it comes to you, what surprises Toji is that he uses this skill to help instead of getting something for himself.
He learned to read you. To understand what your body tells without the need to hearing it from you. Toji understands when something makes you upset, mad, uncomfortable. Even when you're drowning on your emotions and nothing else makes sense: Toji knows you.
And what he learned is that, to silence your mind from all those confusing thoughts, something bigger against you can be distracting enough. To be more exact, to have Toji against you. On his lap, between his arms, beneath him on the couch.
THIS PACKAGE INCLUDES: "I'm warm? How sweet of you." — "Can you hear me now?" — "You feel like you can’t breath? I'll let you go when you get sure of that." — "How's your mind now? Too crowded?" — "Forget about them. Just look at me. That's right. It's you and me, nothing else matters."
.ᐟ.ᐟ SATORU 'DEFENSE ATTORNEY' GOJO
Has someone been harsh to you? A boss ignored your rights? A doctor diminished your requests and questions? You know who to call: Satoru Gojo, your beautiful, funny, interesting, inteligent, kind, considerate [50 adjectives later] boyfriend!
Satoru WILL fight anyone that tries to disrespect you. Don’t matter who, don’t matter why. He's ready to throw hands (or cursed energy, to specify). It can be your mom, he doesn’t care. No one messes with you.
But he also defends you in more pacific terms. He will give whole ass lessons to people that tried to argue with you. He will keep talking until they get it right. If someone tries to embarrass you, Satoru is embarrassing them. He doesn’t care about anyone. If they were able to make you uncomfortable, than they are able of dealing with some discomfort too.
THIS PACKAGE INCLUDES: "Well, actually..." — "I understand what you're saying. Completely. But you're wrong and I will tell why exactly why." — "Say that again." — "You must think you are so funny." — "You think so? Ok, sit down. I'll explain it all to you."
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literaryvein-reblogs · 26 days ago
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Words You Always Have to Look Up
Nonplussed
Means “perplexed.”
But there is a further point of confusion that can send someone to the dictionary: since the mid-20th century, nonplussed has been increasingly used to mean “unimpressed” or “unsurprised,” and this use, though often considered an error, has made the confident deployment of this word a fraught issue for many.
Anodyne
Sometimes words sort of seem to telegraph their meaning: pernicious sounds like a bad thing rather than a good thing, and beatific sounds like something to be desired as opposed to something to be avoided.
This is all fairly subjective, of course, but the sounds of words can have an effect on how we perceive them.
Anodyne doesn’t give us many clues in that way. It turns out that anodyne is a good thing: it means “serving to alleviate pain” or “innocuous,” from the Greek word with similar meanings.
Supercilious
Used to describe people who are arrogant and haughty or give off a superior attitude.
It comes from the Latin word meaning “eyebrow,” and was used in Latin to refer to the expression of arrogant people, and this meaning was transferred to English.
Amusingly, the word supercilious was added to some dictionaries in the 1600s—a time when many Latin words were translated literally into English—with the meanings “pertaining to the eyebrows” or “having great eyebrows.”
Stochastic
In scientific and technical uses, it usually means “involving probability” or “determined by probability,” and is frequently paired with words like demand, model, processing, and volatility.
Comes from the Greek word meaning “skillful at aiming,” which had become a metaphor for “guessing.”
It’s a term that had long been used by mathematicians and statisticians, and has come into more public discourse with stochastic terrorism, the notion that accusations or condemnations of a person or group can lead to violence against that person or group. This allows those who make the initial accusations to seem innocent from any specific violent act, but stochastic terrorism is a way to identify the motives for such an attack as being set in motion by the words of another person.
Anathema
Means “something or someone that is strongly disliked”.
Initially used to refer to a person who had been excommunicated from the Catholic church.
Came from Greek through Latin into English with the meaning of “curse” or “thing devoted to evil,” but today refers to anything that is disapproved of or to be avoided.
There is a strangeness about the way this word is used in a sentence. Because anathema is usually used without an or the, as in “raincoats are anathema to high fashion” or “those ideas are anathema in this class” it may seem just odd enough to send people to the dictionary when they encounter it.
Bemused
So close in sound to amused that they have blended together in usage, but they started as very different ideas: bemused originally meant “confused” or “bewildered,” a meaning stemming from the idea of musing or thinking carefully about something, which may be required in order to assess what isn’t easy to understand.
Many people insist that “confused” is still the only correct way to use bemused, but the joining of meanings with amused has resulted in the frequent use of this word to mean “showing wry or tolerant amusement,” a shade of meaning created from the combination.
Words with meanings that seem to crisscross or intersect are sure to send us to the dictionary.
Solipsistic
Means “extremely egocentric” or “self-referential.”
Comes from the Latin roots solus ("alone," the root of sole) and ipse ("self").
As this Latinate fanciness implies, this is a word used in philosophical treatises and debates.
The egocentrism of solipsism has to do with the knowledge of the self, or more particularly the theory in philosophy that your own existence is the only thing that is real or that can be known.
Calling an idea or a person solipsistic can be an insult that identifies a very limited and usually self-serving perspective, or it can be a way to isolate one’s perspective in a useful way.
It’s a word with an abstract meaning, which is a good reason to check that meaning from time to time.
Tautology
A needless or meaningless repetition of words or ideas.
It’s a word about words that can be used in academic writing or as a hifalutin way of saying “redundancy,” as in “a beginner who just started learning.”
Since we value both clarity and originality, especially in writing, tautology is a word that usually carries a negative connotation and is used as a way to criticize a poorly formed sentence or a poorly argued position.
Perspicacious
The ability to see clearly is a powerful metaphor for being able to understand something.
Being perspicacious means having an ability to notice and understand things that are difficult or not obvious, and it comes from the Latin verb meaning “to see through.”
Means “perceptive,” and is often used along with words that have positive connotations like witty, clever, wise, alert, and insightful (another word that uses seeing as a metaphor for understanding).
Peripatetic
Means “going from place to place,” and comes from the Greek word that means “to walk.”
You can say someone who moves frequently has a “peripatetic existence,” or someone who has changed careers several times has had a “peripatetic professional trajectory.”
The root word “to walk” is usually more of a metaphor in the modern use of this word—it means frequent changes of place, yes, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that you are wearing out your shoes.
The original use of this word did use “walking” as a more literal image, however: it was a description of the way that the philosopher Aristotle preferred to give lectures to his students while walking back and forth, and the word has subsequently taken on a more metaphorical meaning.
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oceanxveiined · 2 years ago
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At her very core, she is the very definition of “jack of all trades, master of none”. She has a acquired a multitude of skills—dance, inventing, song, penmanship and composition, combat, strategy, and investigation, among others—but there is always someone within the Snake Eyes group who will always surpass her in some regard. So why does Ozzy keep her around?
Well, if there’s something she has above everyone else, it’s her tenacity and her daring
#hc; general#//She takes up skills to survive and keep in her back pocket#//Bc every little bit counts in her eyes#//She likes being over prepared for any thing and everything; and as self-sufficient as can be#//It does come in handy; but she can never truly call herself an expert in anything saved learned studies#//Her amassed knowledge and ever-expanding collection of information is her greatest asset#//But it’s the fact that she cannot for the life of her know when to quit that her ‘boss’ likes most#//She could be disemboweled and on her last legs; and she would STILL insist upon pushing forwards#//She could be faced with an enemy she KNOWS she can’t beat; and still step up to challenge them if need be#//She could find a snag In information that makes no sense; and she will OBSESS over it until she finds the solution or some progress#//But she cannot ever except conceding defeat whatsoever; not unless REALLY forced to#//And even then she will already be planning on how to come out on top the Instant she is able to re-engage#//To Ozzy; it’s both practical; considering the work he gives her; and good for his amusement#//Bc she will always take life or death gambles; no matter the odds; without balking in the slightest#//She will make necessary sacrifices and take the needed wounds to ensure she wins#//Anything and everyone around her; including herself; can become an exploitable pawn to ensure her successes#//Whether or not she will make sure they also come out unscathed is up to how much she likes/needs them in the long run#//She hates admitting anyone is better than her in something; but knows very well her limits in expertise compared to her allies and others#//Won’t stop her from arrogantly acting like she’s the best though#//Wsp if she so happens to use what she knows from a different field to help make herself seem more skilled in smth than she actually is#//So yeah; the thing she is best at is literally learning/retention and staying alive out of spite—which serves her quite well#//If even if it does make her SO envious and snippy when she’d faced with someone better/stronger#//Oz reckons that it can prove more valuable than skill alone esp if sb needs to make a dicey snap decision; is why she gets thmost mission#//She likes to think it’s bc he recognizes her strength; but it’s genuinely bc he likes seeing what results from her getting in deep shit#//& the assurance that even if she fails; her determination will still get them SOMETHING decent out of it; she’d make sure of it#//She’s the hardest on herself if she fails; after all. so she does what she can to ensure her failures are not Absolute—Oz appreciates tha
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teojira · 5 months ago
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[Click Click Boom] [Shadow x Reader short stories]
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Summary: You're set to be Shadow's companion to keep an eye on him and keep him in line, a courtesy from the goverment for him saving the world with Sonic and the others.
Word count: 1.8k
Warnings: Can be read as platonic or romantic! Shadow/reader romance is implied though! You're human in this, age is vague but you're meant to be in your 20s.
Disclaimer: Shadow is an adult, and as for the furry debate, he's literally an adult who can consent and is sentient, don't like? Don't read!
A/N: I've literally been obsessed with this fucker since I was a literal child and it's the first time I've written for him!! The trailer yas me going insane. This is written well before the movie has come out, literally all I got to work with is Shadow in the trailer and the bits and pieces of info I psychoanalized so I don't wanna hear shit about it not being accurate tbh, this is self indulgent!!
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Shadow isn't the worst task you've been assigned, you both are more akin to awkward roommates more than anything.
I'm talking randomly lingering in the corners of the room, his bright red eyes glowing and they always seemed to be locked right onto you.
You screamed the first dozen times, but now you just glare at the black hedgehog and spit out a "fuck you." and go about your business.
He'll never admit that it brings him infinite amusement, it's hard to tell, but the huff he lets out is evidence enough.
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Shadow will never admit he cares for you, he loses everyone he cares for, and humans don't live that long. It's terrifying to think about how much he's come to like you.
He's not nearly as slick as he thinks he is.
You're sitting down at the dinner table, typing away on your laptop, editing the mission report from the other day when Shadow makes his way towards you. Sending him a nod in his direction, you don't think of anything when he moves in close.
A huge slam takes you off guard though, jumping damn near out of your skin as you twist your head to look at him.
"What the fuck-"
"Take it."
It's one of Shadow's guns, his emblem being engraved along the stock.
"What? No, I have guns." You raise an eyebrow at the hog, his face is perfectly still, eyes locking onto yours as he waits for you to grab the heckler.
"Your guns are worthless, you need something better."
"Well excuse me, I so happen to like my guns." You try and joke back, but the offense is taken.
Shadow rolls his eyes so hard you're scared that he's gonna blind himself. Jutting his chin towards the table once more to get your focus back onto it.
"If you have one of mine, I know you're safe." He doesn't elaborate. Not that he needs to.
"...Thank you, Shad."
All you get is a grunt in response, and he's on his way back to his room.
Gingerly picking up the weapon, you take in how pristine it is, a thumb caressing your small initials that you missed on the other side of the stock.
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With Shadow saving the world, the reeking of havoc makes it to where he's limited to what he is allowed to do in the public eye.
Not that he listens, he isn't supposed to be out after curfew. But to be fair, it is extremely hard to keep a teleporting hedgehog confined to a meager two-story house.
You can hear him teleport above you, he's on the roofs of the nearby building, leering down at you.
It was a small errand you were on, simply stocking up on the essentials for the house.
Namely, snacks for Shadow, he doesn't ask for a lot other than coffee beans and Doritos.
You are choosing to ignore the fact that he eats the coffee beans straight up, the crunch echoes through your head and it sends a shudder down your spine.
He was adamant against you leaving the house this late, standing in front of the front door.
"No."
"Fuck you mean no?"
"I said no."
"....I don't listen to men."
And you weaved around him to leave the house, ignoring his shout of disapproval.
That leads you both to here now, you pretending you don't see him trailing you from the rooftops as you walk your way back home from the small shopping center.
You feign surprise when he opens the house door for you, begrudgingly sticking a hand out to help you with your bags.
"Oh! Thank you my knight in shining armor~"
"Shut it."
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He's never told you his birthday, which you can understand, living for 50 years and not having your family around must be hard. No matter how he may fake that it doesn't bother him.
That doesn't stop you, not in the slightest really. You damn near kick him out of the house for the day, shoving him over to Tom and Maddie's house so he can be with the others. Despite how much he protested.
"I don't want to go over there. Not with that blue fake."
"You don't really have a choice bub, I need you out of the house."
"I don't understand why I have to-"
"Keep arguing with me and I will make it a point to not buy you shit next grocery trip."
It's an empty threat, but he grunts nonetheless.
"...."
"That's what I thought."
When he finally gets home from his long and admittedly overstimulating day with the Wachowskis, he's ready to recharge in his room.
He teleports through the house door, sighing and rubbing at his temples as he moves to kick off his shoes, knowing that if he doesn't, you'd chastise him for not doing so.
Something about tracking dirt and rocket fuel into the carpet.
Whatever.
After trying to massage his brain through his fur, he opens his eyes up to see a colorful banner strung across the mantle.
'Happy birthday!' It screams, in its disgustingly neon color palette.
Shadow wracks his brain for any information of it being your birthday, he knows for a fact it isn't today. A friend you're throwing a party for? Well, that makes no sense, he knows very well you don't have many friends, especially any that you'd invite your house up for.
You're antisocial to a fault, not that he has absolutely any room to talk.
He hears you before he sees you, turning the corner into the living room, carrying some balloons in your hands. A stupid little party hat on your head.
"Shadow! What are you doing back so early?"
Kicking off the last shoe, he stands at his full height, staring into your eyes with a shrug.
"I wasn't aware I had a time."
"....fair enough, anyways, fuck, goddamnit. Stay here. Okay?"
And you're off, running into the kitchen, his ears flick at the slamming of the fridge door, followed by the cabinets being no doubt, hip nudging it shut way too forcefully.
He's awkwardly standing there still until you yell for him to come in.
Shadow has half a mind to ignore you and go into his room, but curiosity kills the cat, so he takes in a deep breath and makes his way to you.
He finds you sitting at the little kitchenette, a nervous smile spread across your lips as you gesture to the plate in front of you.
The smell is apparent, it's a coffee cupcake.
The hedgehog feels his ears flick again, staring down at the desert, then trailing his eyes back to meet your own. Wordlessly asking you what was going on.
"You've never told me your birthday, but it's been a year since you've been here, with me. After the whole trying to destroy the world shit. So since you won't tell me, we can kinda treat this as it?" You keep rambling, eyes flitting around the room, very clearly nervous as to his reaction.
Shadow doesn't say anything, or move even. Just staring down at the cupcake.
It looks amateurish, the frosting is lopsided, and the toppings on it look messy. But you made it for him. You even added a big black "1" candle in the center.
He doesn't know what to say, he can feel heat rush through his body, rushing to his ears and his face, and his fur feels constricting.
What the fuck.
What the actual fuck.
You go to open your mouth again, no doubt to apologize, but he beats you to it.
Moving to scoop up the treat, he gently sniffs it before taking a cautionary bite.
A beat passes between the two of you.
"...it's good."
Shadow does his best to ignore the smile that blooms across your face, not wanting to remember just how pretty he finds you like this.
Disgusting.
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Shadow doesn't like touch, you know it, he knows it, and everyone knows it. He's threatened to break Sonic's wrist for even so much as patting the older hedgehog on the back. Baring his sharper fangs and hissing out to not touch him ever.
He avoids group hugs from Team Sonic, avoids Tom and Maddie like the plague, dodging every invitation to be a part of the family, it makes him sick to think about it.
With you, it's a little different.
You're not like them, you don't push him to change, you don't have a problem with how closed off he is, giving him space, never once pushing his very strict boundaries.
Something churns in his chest at the sound of you crying in your room, you probably think you're being incognito, holding a pillow to your face to drown out your sobs.
The internal debate is heavy, Shadow used to be able to comfort, to provide warmth, but he hasn't done so in years. Flashes of memories where he would comfort Maria on her bad health days, letting her run her fingers over his quills, to lend an ear to Gerald when he was frustrated about treatments not working.
It's not to say he is replacing you in their place, but it's scary. To open himself up like that again. He can feel his anxiety rising as he goes over the pros and cons of crossing this line. Eyes squeeze shut forcefully as he tells himself he doesn't care about you, that you're an adult, and you don't need to be babied.
His ears twitch when a pathetic little whimper drops from your lips, and his resolve cracks.
You don't look up when he makes his way in, too stuck in your bubble.
Startling a little when two, much stronger and larger hands grab at your own, peeling them away from the pillow. Your puffy bloodshot eyes looking at the hedgehog in front of you, his face set as it usually is, stoic. But his eyes are different, and his body language is different, when has he ever looked at you so softly? It's jarring.
Oh, he's moving closer. Okay. Weird.
"Shadow? Uh, I'm ok-"
You try and lie, it's a pitiful attempt. Your voice is scratchy and the tear tracks down your cheeks aren't helping your plight.
"No, you're not."
He shuts you down immediately, hands sliding up your arms to drag you into him.
The instant your bodies touch, you feel a fresh wave of tears well up in your eyes again.
Shadow has you resting against him, your head resting on him as he wraps himself loosely in your arms, giving you the space to move away if you so choose.
It's the first time he's allowed you to hug him, the first time he's ever initiated contact with someone in years. A fact that you both are well aware of.
A sob works its way up your throat, immediately tightening your grip on the hedgehog, curling into him as you shake.
Shadow doesn't say anything, doesn't make fun of you as snot pours from your nose, doesn't point out that your mascara and eyeliner are getting everywhere, just sits there and lets you cling onto him like he's your only lifeline.
He thinks that this is okay, he's strong enough for you both, and you don't need to worry when he's here.
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