#modern talking meme

[whispermask]

[twistedappletree]

lan sizhui: *hanging out with the other juniors* hey guys, do you mind if i invite a few more friends?

lan jingyi, jin ling, ouyang zizhen: sure, why not?

lan sizhui: great! *pulls out a ouija board*

[tanked-up]

(Missed call from Soap)

Ghost: I’m in the bathroom, I can’t talk

(Missed Video Chat from Soap)

Ghost: MOTHERFUCKER IM IN THE BATHROOM

(In text)

Soap: You peeing with your goddamn finger, stupid?

[myzkagirl]

thats not leon kennedy thats leonard canada

[ivebeendressingforrevenge]

Today it randomly struck me that Claire is the only woman in Lost Season 1 that hasn't been married before?? And one of the only women in the entire show to have never been married before.

Kate was married to Kevin (well, really Monica was married to Kevin), and then they split after Kate revealed her identity.

Sun is obviously married to Jin.

Shannon was apparently married before the island.

Rose is married to Bernard.

Juliet was married to fellow doctor Edmund Burke, before he sooo tragically got hit by a bus.

Claire somehow managed to dodge marriage throughout the entire series.

[cure-whimsy]

how I think tufflout confessed in a modern AU

[corviiids]

THANKS @kimdokjafan you are so kind and generous. ok im cashing in the first of three blank checks to talk about faith trust and pixie dust (most recent chatfic) because the last two directors commentaries were too serious so let's do a silly one.

some p5r spoilers, and this is mostly about sumire, and it's long again. do i need to keep disclaiming that these are long? you should know me by now.

i had this written for a while before i started formatting it because i wasn't really sure if i should post it? i feel like silly chatfic is something people go to for predominantly lighthearted nonsense so i was like, maybe there's too much plot and dramatic misunderstanding and i should just keep this one for myself. but then i was like well nothing matters and maybe someone will have fun with it. it's kind of terrible how much fully or mostly completed fic there is my docs that just doesn't see the light of day lol. write for yourself etc but i like sharing! too bad it comes with the mortifying ordeal etc. anyway that was a tangent

potato counter is a neopets game. there's no deep lore i just like neopets. i guess in this universe ryuji doesn't play neopets? or maybe he's just never played potato counter specifically. i also have a different fic where ryuji DOES play neopets. it's about neopets and ryuji and goro talking on neopets.

i think this might literally be the first time ive written sumi in a fic because i haven't actually written that much fic for royal, like, now that im looking, literally almost none? and none that had a group dynamic. so it was kind of fun to find her voice for the first time in a silly groupchat like this. i was worried people would find her exclamation marks annoying but i personally thought it was endearing so i added it in there.

every time i do a gag where a character corrects their own typo i have to code more stupid little bubbles to make it happen but i think it's worth it. all the effort that goes into making tgis look as much like a real chat as possible

this obviously doesnt take place in the canon p5/r universe, but im imagining sort of a postcanon sumi personality where she's more comfortable being herself and isn't borrowing kasumi's brand of confidence, but she's visibly a really anxious person without that kasumi veneer. i also think in this universe sumire is a fairly recent addition to the friend group, and while everyone likes her a lot and she really likes them, i kind of wanted to emphasise that feeling of being in a friend group where everyone's established and you're sort of a plus-one? you don't really fit yet. part of that is her being new, part of it is her anxiety, part of it is just the kind of person sumi is where she's so polite and self-conscious she ends up taking herself out of things with her own good intentions. stuff like her interrupting the flow of an existing conversation by greeting everyone instead of jumping straight in because she doesn't feel comfortable inserting herself, which means everyone else stops to greet her even though that doesn't normally happen in a friend group, or making a point of thanking everyone for being invited to events while the others take it as a given.

idk i love that she feels a bit out of place with the phantom thieves in p5r. and part of that is a natural consequence of being a new addition in royal who can't be naturally integrated with an existing dynamic but i honestly feel like the writing team realised that and acknowledged it, and really leaned into it, and that made it work incredibly well for me. like, it's part of her character that she's sort of an outsider. it's not like p4g's incredibly clumsy integration of marie and subsequent attempt to shove her down everyone's throat as the canon love interest in p4ga (knife). sumi has that outsider vibe on purpose and it makes me really like her dynamic with the thieves as an individual

goro also feels slightly out of place in these chats, but his conversational style blends more naturally with the other thieves at this point and he even uses their codenames sometimes. i keep saying my chatfic series isn't a real Series because the lore keeps changing, but if we accept that they're all kind of following a General Continuity, assume this takes place some time after the last fic in which ren added goro to the groupchat and they made an effort to integrate him into their friend group. he's kind of there now and has settled into being the weird boyfriend. that's his role.

every time goro says something like "ren and i" assume it's the text equivalent of him talking to the group with his arm around ren's waist.

ok i got really fond of this silly running joke where sumi brings up the weather when she's feeling uncomfortable. she's so polite. i like this thread because setting it up meant i got to tie it off like this:

this just made me happy lol i liked writing this. i tried to use it to demonstrate that despite goro's abrasiveness he obviously knows sumire pretty well, he's attuned to her quirks and knows how to tell when she's having a bad time with her anxiety, so he uses her little weather habit to ground her.

i honestly dont think goro and sumire could be considered close in p5r and as much as i like the "royal trio" in canon they're not really... like... friends? with each other? they're both attached to ren, so it' more a V shape than anything else. but that said, i really LIKE goro and sumi's canon dynamic. he takes a really grouchy but politely attentive supervisory role to her during their few forays into the palace as a trio where he doesn't really know her well but clearly identifies her as a harmless little tryhard who needs some guidance and steps into that role grudgingly, and she immediately looks up to him despite being very wrong footed by his ruthlessness, which i find incredibly charming. i think given time they could be good friends, they just didn't get much chance to know each other very well in canon. so i tried to kinda do that here.

once goro stops being evil and joins the group they all kind of tiredly accept that his role is to occasionally push a cup off a bench while smirking and refuse to clean it up. emotionally, i mean.

wait i need to backtrack chronologically to talk about akeshu.

in this scene they're in the same room lol talking and snickering while typing. im trying to get at that vibe of the annoying couple who is flirting with each other, via you. you know? like ostensibly they're talking to you (sumire) but everything they say to you is part of their stupid game. sumi is incidental to goro and ren teasing each other about flirting with someone else, goro is reporting everything ren says because his boyfriend is so eye-rollingly foolish in a cute way. they're very tickled by how amusing and charming they are. gross. disgusting. sumire im so sorry for putting you through this

anyway here are too many of my favourite jokes from the fic

[javierduffy]

this post in my twitter drafts makes me laugh so hard every time i think about it i fear i have to share with the class

[hannibard]

I found the most perfect geraskier porn au fanfiction with the most delicious jaskier whump from 2020 that I somehow missed till now and when I clicked on the author, wanting to check their other fics, it was an orphan acount

[themistdragon]

If TDP was in a modern setting, Ethari would LOVE Forged in Fire.

Like, a competitive blacksmithing show??? And he's a dad, so he MUST have a Dad Show that he watches after a long day.

[tanked-up]

(Soap and Ghost both soaked after supposedly being “pranked” by the rookies. Turns out Soap fell on a small lake near where they were training, and Ghost ran after him. Now they’re both starring at Price who’s heavily arguing and giving a “pep talk” to the rookies who threw the supposed “prank)

Soap: One of us should probably say something…

Ghost: You fell first

Soap: You went after me

(Ghost stares at Soap)

Ghost: Wouldn’t hurt those rookies to get one of Price’s pep talks…

Soap: Right…

[lapislazulidevirgo]

✨Romantic Warriors✨

[ghost-train-to-strawberry-fields]

[oh-cramity-its-amity]

sometimes i think about that moment of dana talking about the cast's music taste and it makes me quite disappointed because i feel she got it completely wrong and missed the potential of what hunter would listen to. sorry but linkin park feels so basic??? hunter feels like he would like obscure shit. AND AS SOMEONE WHO LISTENS TO METAL LIKE BROO i have like opinions. also WHAT do you mean luz listens to kpop. i completely fucking disagree sorry. j-rock is more like it if anything or indie pop/rock. it does not fit with her at all. kpop feels to mainstream?? and besides she likes anime right? dont you think shed want to listen to anime openings and like all sorts of things having to do with the culture. j-rock fucks. i dont listen to MUCH of it because i havent found much but like she doesnt seem like shed listen to that dana why would you say that :(. ive been constructing her taste in my mind for YEARS and you say the wrong thing. BOO. hottest take ever and you arent cooking. your burning it.

[sofastuffing]

i have a headache

[writing-from-the-wasteland]

These spot the difference games are getting harder by the day