#mind you i’ve never been to chili’s

[gothsuguru]

all i have written down for the catoru fic <3 this came to me in a dream part 2 (just like wormguru)

[sunnibits]

love comes in the form of my family effortlessly making food accommodations for me btw. if you even care.

[moonstruckme]

Hey!! I saw your posts about colour blind!reader and reader with hearing problems and i really love them, I have to wear hearing aids myself so it is really lovely to see some representation!! So I was wondering if you could do remus x reader (or any marauder i don't mind) where the readers hearing aids broke and remus has to help them communicate for the day while they wait to get them fixed? If you aren't comfortable with that don't worry<33

I'm so glad you liked them sweetness, thanks for requesting! Unfortunately I don't have anyone in my life who uses hearing aids that I could consult about this, so I had to rely on the internet and apologize for any inaccuracies <33

Remus Lupin x fem!reader ♡ 653 words

“Moony,” James says, cocking his head at you inside Remus’ car. You’re sitting placidly in the passenger seat while the car trembles with bass. “What’s she doing?”

“She likes the vibrations,” Remus replies, carrying a giant tupperware container of chili. Ever since he moved in with Lily, James has taken to “accidentally” making too much of nearly every meal they have so that his friends are forced to come over and take home leftovers. (“I thought the recipe was supposed to be tripled,” James had said over the phone. “You’ve gotta take some off my hands, Moony, it’s gonna go bad.”) 

“She’s gonna be shaking the whole block if she turns that up any louder,” Sirius says, following them out of the house. “How can she stand it?”

“Hearing aids broke yesterday,” Remus explains, opening the passenger door. James flinches at the sound that bursts out, and Remus hands you the chili before reaching around you to turn down the dial on the radio. “We’re waiting for the shop to call so we can pick them up,” he finishes. 

You wave at the boys, and they wave back with smiles somewhat bemused. 

“How bad is her hearing without them?” James asks concernedly. 

You go to respond, having read the question on his lips, but Remus sets a hand on your shoulder. 

Hold on, he signs to you. This will be more fun. 

You roll your eyes, but play along with his game, letting Remus speak for you as if you can’t do it yourself. 

“She can’t hear much of anything,” Remus says. It’s the honest truth, though he neglects to mention that you’re still perfectly capable of speaking and also quite skilled at reading lips even without the aids. “Some loud noises or things with a deep pitch, but not enough to make out speech.” 

“Huh,” James says. “Well, tell her I hope she enjoys the chili.” 

This is great, Remus signs to you. I never get to practice. 

You’re mean, you sign back, even as your lips twitch at the corners.

“She says she’s sure she will,” Remus says. “Thanks for saving us some.” 

James grins. “No problem.” 

“If she really likes vibrations, she should come take a ride on my bike sometime,” Sirius suggests, and he’s smiling, because he knows exactly how Remus will feel about that offer. Remus hates the idea of even Sirius, let alone you, on a motorcycle. “Tell ‘er, Moons.” 

You’re already looking at Remus with a mischievous smile. 

No way, he tells you. Not happening.

Buzzkill, you fingerspell. 

Remus shrugs, and he doesn’t need to sign anything for you to read and what about it? in his expression. 

“Ooh, they’re fighting,” Sirius deduces, laughing darkly. “This sign language stuff isn’t so hard to pick up on, is it Prongs? You can get the general meaning from their faces.” 

Remus plasters on a smile. Not hard? I’ve been learning for two years, he vents to you. 

You give a little laugh. Don’t listen, he doesn’t know what he’s talking about. But at least tell him I said thanks for the offer.

Remus turns to Sirius. “She says fuck you.” 

You make a sound of offense, slapping Remus’ arm lightly. 

“Okay, okay,” he relents. “She said thank you for the offer. But no.” 

“It’s crazy,” James says with a little smile. “Everything you’re claiming she says sounds exactly like what you would say if you could choose, Moony.” He glances at you, and you raise your eyebrows like I know, right?

“Alright, we’d better be off,” Remus decides, shutting your door for you and rounding the front of the car. “Thanks for the chili, Prongs. And Pads, your bike is banned to her, so don’t offer again.” 

“Buzzkill,” Sirius calls after him, but Remus pretends not to hear, shutting his door. 

“Hey,” you say, your voice a bit louder than you’d usually allow. You’re grinning at Remus. “That’s exactly what I said!”

[brittle-doughie]

yo think we could get the Deliciously Evil Banquet cutscene with Y/N Cookie involved? just thought it would be fun to see after reading your Deal with Ancients story (can’t wait to see more of that btw)

i can just imagine the CoD deliberately setting up the seating so that Y/N is the closest one to them lol

Timeless Kingdom - Deliciously Evil Banquet (Reader Insert)

Never waste good food!

You entered the banquet hall, the sight of Dark Enchantress Cookie herself was enough to put you on edge, her entourage sitting alongside her, their eyes fixed in your direction didn’t help matters…

“Welcome, Y/N Cookie and friends.”

“Dark Enchantress Cookie! We are not going to be swayed by some food!”

Gingerbrave resisted the temptation of the banquet, Custard Cookie III not so much, which irritated Chili Pepper Cookie.

“Come on! Let’s take our seats! The jellies are getting cold!”

“Hey! Aren’t you a little TOO excited?!”

Esterházy interrupted for a brief moment to help with any belongings, of which Custard Cookie accepted real quickly.

“A grand idea! Here, hold my crown and scepter. Try not to get them wrinkled.”

“Very well, sir. As for everyone else...If you would please take your seats?”

You hesitate, but you go to sit down, hopefully as far away from the CoD as possible…before Esterházy stopped you with his hand.

“My apologies, sir/madam. But your seat is actually at the other end of the table, you’ve been specifically requested to sit there.”

This news surprised you and the group, Healer Cookie especially…

“What?!”

“Hehe, yeah! You’re sitting with us, Y/N Cookie. Right next to Dark Enchantress Cookie herself!”

You pondered on running out that door…..

…before sighing in defeat and trudged to the other side of the table. You couldn’t see it, but their eyes were on you as you head over to that empty seat amidst the CoD, Dark Enchantress Cookie patting it invitingly.

“Come, Y/N Cookie. You and your friends are the first Cookies to pass the gates—the first to be PERSONALLY welcomed into my fold. Let us have a heart-to-heart discussion~”

You sit down next to Dark Enchantress Cookie, she’d lean down and whisper in your (nonexistent) ear.

“And I’ve been looking forward to a heart-to-heart with you, Y/N Cookie~”

“Oh! So, like, can we ask you anything? Cause, I've been dying to know!How did you train the Cake Monsters? I want one as well!”

Custard Cookie III’s question made Dark Enchantress lean back into her seat as she softly laughed at the young cookie’s question.

“I wonder, Y/N Cookie. How long will Gingerbrave and the others cloud your mind?”

Not this again with Pomegranate Cookie…you whispered at her to knock it off.

“Did they tell you that there is a different path away from my Master’s embrace? You are being wasted on them, there’s only Dark Enchantress Cookie left for you. There’s only the darkness left for you..!”

“Hey, stop hogging all their attention..!”

You let Licorice and Pomegranate bicker at each other, saved you the trouble of Pomegranate’s rants again.

“Y/N Cookie….! Are you going to play with me soon? I have shroomies I want to share!”

You’ll consider it….Poison Mushroom didn’t do anything majorly wrong in your eyes…yet.

Dark Choco Cookie…he didn’t want to look at you in the eyes, your previous encounters with him must still be fresh in his mind…

“But before we progress any further...I have a question for you, our "esteemed" guests.”

“Do you know the reason why we, Cookies, were created?”

Dark Enchantress Cookie’s question snapped you out of your thoughts, your jam ran cold at the thoughts of your real purpose as a cookie…

Custard and Chili Pepper have their own answers to the question, none of which surprised Dark Enchantress Cookie.

“Nope!”

“Me neither! But I know I was baked with a particular set of skills! Heh!”

“How predictable. Pathetic. And you call yourselves COOKIES! What an absolute waste of perfectly fine dough!”

Dark Enchantress Cookie briefly glanced at you.

“Well, most of you are wastes of fine dough anyway. Although, one of you still shows great promise.”

“Y/N Cookie, do you know the real reason why we, Cookies, were created?

You…..hesitated.

The others were not ready to hear it. What’s meant to be their ultimate fate! It made your eyes dart back and forth in nervousness.

“Don’t be shy, my dear. We’re all listening~”

“Don’t listen to her, Y/N Cookie! She’s trying to lie to you again!”

“I'm wasting my efforts on you all. How selfish of you to have Y/N Cookie witness your crumbs litter this table!”

Did she just threaten to kill them all?!

She was not going to do that-

“STOP! I can no longer stand by and watch you bring destruction and corrupt cookies like Y/N Cookie with your evil!”

“HA! And who might YOU be? What is it that YOU can do to stop ME? You're a dusty, ragged, and unnamed nobody. Nothing but a memory that Y/N Cookie will forget very soon.”

“Yes... I have been hiding for far too long...But the time has come to step out from the shadows.”

“I will sacrifice everything to put an end to your schemes!”

“YOU!”

Pure Vanilla Cookie?!

Actually, that made a whole lot more sense now that you look back on it. Wizard and Gingerbrave was still in shock.

“PURE VANILLA COOKIE?!”

“HOLD MY CANE! Healer Cookie is Pure Vanilla Cookie?!”

“Ah...It seems that an uninvited guest was among us. Have you FINALLY realized how pathetic you are and have come to hand over your Soul Jam and see me rightfully claim Y/N Cookie as mine?”

M-ma’am, you were not property.

“Y/N Cookie will never go with you. I’ve seen their soul and know that it will shine the brightest and will never fall into your hands!”

“Tell me then... How do you plan to stop ME? Did you think your ragged attire and worn expression would win my sympathy?”

“*Tsk* What a waste of a good banquet...Enough of this!”

Dark Enchantress was not happy with the situation, Pomegranate was not happy with the situation as you low-key shifted your chair away from the CoD.

“How dare you ruin my Master's plan! Fate will not be on your side tonight!”

[veinsfullofstars]

for your childhood friends au, do the kids have any favorite foods?

Ooooh, okay okay, so this is something I’ve actually given a fair bit of thought to (maybe too much thought given how long this thing got, haha). I love little details like this in character writing - it makes them feel so much more alive and well-rounded, y'know? The kiddos have preferences as varied as their personalities, and I’m just itching to get into it, so… let’s get into it! (Also, just to be clear, I did pull some of my food headcanons for MK and DDD specifically from source material and the wiki, but most of this kinda just comes right off the dome.)

When it comes to food, Para Dee is probably the most milquetoast of the bunch (though that’s hardly a bad thing). Neither a voracious eater like Dedede nor an avoidant one like Meta, he enjoys food about as much as the average Waddle Dee, more than fine with his three square meals a day (maybe a snack if he’s good). His tastes primarily lean towards savory or bitter flavors, anything from a warm bowl of stew to a nice crisp salad depending on his mood (meaning that, of the four of them, he’s the most likely to eat his veggies... and enjoy them). He’s not the biggest fan of sweets (probably due to that fact that his father is a baker and routinely saturates their home with the heavy scents of vanilla and mixed fruit), but he does have a soft spot floral teas and hot chocolate, especially during the colder seasons. He doesn’t mind sour flavors in small amounts (meaning if someone gets pickles with their meal, you know they’re going onto Para’s plate), but spicy foods? Forget about it. His poor little stomach has no tolerance for spice, to the point where even a little too much pepper has him breaking out in a sweat (something Bow teases him about mercilessly).

If you asked him what his absolute favorite food is, he’d have a hard time choosing... but he'd probably say his father’s caramelized onion soup, a much-beloved dish at their dinner table and a favorite at every community potluck. It’s never quite the same when Para makes it (many years into the future with a family of his own), but it still sparks warm memories of holidays and togetherness with each cheese-laden spoonful.

Then, on the opposite side of the spectrum, we have Bow Dee, our tiny terror with a metabolism and appetite to rival those of her bigger buddies. If left alone and unoccupied for too long, she’s been known to sneak into locked pantries or climb high, off-limits shelves looking for any snacks she can get her grubby little mitts on (a habit she probably learned from watching Dedede). That said, she can be rather picky about which foods she’ll scarf down, especially in her youth when she would literally pick through her meals for the bits she liked and ignore the rest (much to her mothers’ chagrin).

If asked about her favorites, she’d say she likes protein-packed foods the most (omelets, jerky, trail mix, whatever will fuel those boundless energy reserves of hers in the saltiest, most flavorful manner possible) but refuses to touch veggies, pickles, and bitter flavors in general (at least in her childhood, growing a little more adventurous about food during their time overstars). She likes sweets as much as the average high-energy kid, partial to citrus fruits and sour candies especially (she likes how it stings a bit when you eat it, almost like it's fighting back). And, beyond all that, Bow loves spicy foods. Full stop. If it ain’t spicy - or spicy enough - she’ll find a way to make it so. Chili flakes, hot sauce, whole peppers, whatever she has on hand - it’s going in there, and Nova help anyone who tries to stop her. A bit ironic given her natural affinity for Water, though maybe that’s what gives her such a high tolerance for capsaicin. Or maybe she’s just that badass (as she likes to brag to her buddies, watching them steam out the ears from a single jalapeño while she’s already chomped down seven). And before you ask, yes, this has landed her in village clinic on more than one occasion. High tolerance or no, she definitely does not have Dedede’s cast-iron stomach… or Meta’s self-restraint. (We don’t talk about the Ghost Pepper Fiasco.)

Speaking of picky eaters, Meta has a… complicated relationship with food. He’s never had much of an appetite, often going (unsettlingly long) stretches of time without feeling the need to eat, only doing so if someone reminds him to (or if he gets too woozy, whichever comes first). He does need to eat, of course… just not nearly as often as everyone else does, it would seem (a byproduct of his peculiar biology, perhaps?). It’s an excuse he’s used often to get away with skipping meals, sometimes substituting in lighter foods like breakfast bars or Energy Drinks to keep his strength up (though this is hardly a long-term solution). He also finds certain textures and tastes difficult to deal with, even turning down entire meals if just one bite feels off. It makes eating with company - already an awkward experience thanks to his introversion - that much more uncomfortable, sitting there with a full plate while everyone else chews and chatters around him, wishing he could disappear as swiftly as his hunger (a habit that still crops up even in adulthood, though he has learned to push through it for the sake of politeness). Honestly, he could write a whole dissertation on how the act of consumption is a burden upon the living and no one should be subjected to it… and then he remembers chocolate exists and takes it all back for a while.

That’s really the one exception to his food trepidation: sweets. Perhaps it comes from living in Dream Land where sugary foods are so plentiful, the forests rich with apples and berries, the scent of pies and pastries wafting from windowsills, even the lands themselves named after foods of all sorts. Or perhaps it stems from his earliest memories, a helping hand and a bar of something indescribably sweet and rich, the first he’d ever tasted… Whatever the case, it’s stuck with him, a livelong love of sweets and sweet-adjacent foods, one that narrows, refines, and changes over time into preferences for chocolate, coffee, and other foods with light but flavorful consistencies. Not that this stops his friends (and later his crewmates) from hounding him into eating more nutritious meals once in a while, too. It's frustrating, but he knows they mean well, and he gets better about listening to their advice with time.

And finally, whipping to the other side of the scale once more, it’s Dedede, the penguin equivalent of a vacuum, willing to eat literally anything you put in front of him (including things you probably should not eat). He wouldn’t say he has many strong preferences - all food is good food in his eyes - though he does appreciate a good bone-in steak or similarly hearty dishes like seafood or pasta, and he could never pass up a nice rich dessert (especially cakes).

More than the taste, though, it’s really the act of eating - a pastime even more beloved than sparring or sleeping - that brings Dedede comfort, whether it’s through cozy communal meals with neighbors, the thrill of food-based competitions with friends (ones that will later inspire Dream Land’s famous Gourmet Races), or just to deal with the boredom (and loneliness) when he’s stuck on his own. It’s possible he gets this behavior from his mama, a little on the heavier side herself and known for her own cast-iron constitution back in her wrestling days (not to mention prone to spoiling her “darlin’ baby bird” and his friends with extra treats all the time). Meanwhile, his papa - a stickler for decency and discipline - is constantly reminding his son to slow down during meal times, wondering if he’s even tasting the food he’s shoving down his gullet (a blunt but well-intentioned criticism given the many, many tummy troubles Dedede suffers in his younger days). He never manages to fully tame his massive appetite (certainly not helped by the more decadent lifestyle he later adopts as a king), but he does at least refine it over time, learning from Para of all people about the joys of savoring meals rather than always inhaling them outright.

Phew, alright, I think that’s about it. Thanks for the question! Hopefully I didn't go too in-depth for such a simple one - I was having fun with it and might've gotten carried away again, haha. Well, at the very least, it'll give you guys some nuggets to chew on in the meantime (pun super not intended).

Sketches started 06/25/24, finished 06/27/24.

[rimunagenius]

Welcome to my blog!

ʚ Hi cuties! I’m totally refreshing my blog. I’ve had this blog for a year now? and i never even introduced myself. My name is Ria !!

ʚ I’m bi, i love art, crocheting, doing nails, and being a homebody. i play basketball, made varsity my freshman year and played varsity all the way through!

ʚ I actually love writing, whether it’s a paper for school or little imagines and headcannons for my hyper fixation, celebrity crushes, or comfort characters at the time.

ʚ my favorite colors are deep red, baby pink, and black. My favorite band is the Red Hot Chili Peppers, my favorite individual singer is Harry Styles. I listen to a lot of everything. Literally from metal all the way to r&b. Recently i’ve been super into boygenius and MUNA.

but to know a little more, my fav artists are the smiths, the cure, red hot chili peppers, deftones, soundgarden, audioslave (yes ik they’re both chris cornell’s bands), superheaven, fleetwood mac (saw them in concert before christine mcvie passed), muna, boygenius, tyler childers, noah kahn, kendrick lamar, $uicideboy$, pink floyd, system of a down and many many many many more!!

Here are fandoms i’m currently in if you want to dm random hc’s, ff’s, or just be friends and gossip ab their latest updates and episodes, etc. !!!

WCBB — Iowa, UConn, SC, and Oregon

Station 19

Criminal Minds — i will never not be into this fandom i rewatch it every month

Muna

Boygenius

Chicago Fire

Triple Frontier and

Sons of Anarchy

ʚ NOTE that this is and will continue to be a safe space for anyone who is here and queer! I will not tolerate any racism, homophobia, transphobia, xenophobia, and so on…you will be blocked.

I would also like to note, that i would like to keep this page politics and religion free. Starts too many arguments and a lot of hate that I do not want associated to my page!

Thank you, have an amazing day!

Let’s be friends!! I am far too shy and awkward to talk and become friends with people so i just follow in hopes you’d want to be friends, but if your not shy (or you are) but want to be friends but think ill shut it down or won’t answer, im chronically online so im free and open to answer !! i love making new friends!

Here’s some links!!

❀ masterlist

❀ tiktok

[padfootagain]

Old Crush

Hello ! Here is a request that was sent my way by an anon : ‘Great! So I had this idea for a Ben imagine... So you were a big fan of Ben since you saw him in the Narnia movies, and you had a crush on him for years. Now, years later you're dating him but you never told him about knowing who he was before meeting him nor about this crush you had on him/his character (does that have sense?😅) And somehow he finds out and he's mad about it because he feels betrayed that you lied and he thinks you are only dating him because of who he is. But a happy ending, please!’

Thank you for sending in a request, anon! I hope you enjoy what I’ve written for you!

I hope you all like this! Tell me what you think!

****

Pairing: Ben Barnes x reader

Warnings: a bit of angst. Hurt/comfort. Fluffy ending. (the ask was perfect to use some interviews about Ordinary Day so… because I don’t know but whenever he speaks about being enough my heart just goes dfiejierjiejri)

Summary: Ben didn’t know that you were a fan of his already before you started dating, and when he finds out, he doesn’t like it at all. All his insecurities are suddenly brought back to life…

Word Count: 3156

Ben's Masterlist - Main Masterlist

It was a beautiful day, odds were in Ben’s favour to spend a lovely afternoon with you.

Lunch in the sun on your balcony, in your shared home, eating a tasty meal and drinking some fine wine. He glimpsed at the shining ring on your finger as the gem caught the sun and glimmered even more than usual, while he listened to you ramble about something exciting that happened at work. And it was perfect.

Perfect. Everything about this moment, about you, about the two of you… was perfect.

He wasn’t claiming that it wasn’t hard sometimes, because it was. You butted heads, you fought from time to time, you got annoyed at him and he got mad at you. He was away often and you weren’t always around. Sometimes, it was rough, but it was worth it. That was what Ben meant when ‘perfect’ popped into his mind to be written on everything around him. No matter what, he was certain you were the one. No matter what, he was certain he would fight for you. The two of you would make it work, no matter what. Because you were everything he wanted, and he was enough for you.

Him. Ben. Not Ben Barnes, not the actor, not the fame, not the money… just… him. Simple Ben who overthought everything, was too cautious sometimes, had only a vague idea of what a meme was, loved goofing around, and made a mediocre chili that he claimed was amazing. You loved him, and he knew it. He knew that if tomorrow he dropped everything and walked out of the glamour and fame you would hold his hand and give him a bright smile and ask ‘okay, where are we going, then?’ And it made it perfect. To be enough made it perfect…

A dreamy smile formed on his lips at the thought that this was going to last forever. You were signing up for a lifetime together. Endless supplies of banter, of conversations that lasted till dawn, of cuddles on the sofa, of kisses in a kitchen bathed with dawn, of hands holding on each other as if they never wanted to let go. Endless supplies of silly fights forgotten on the pillow, of eyes opening to the sight of the other sleeping, of boxes of chocolate brought home every day for a week every month, of flights caught to close the distance, of faces drawn in pixels and voices distorted by phones, of painful goodbyes before climbing in a cab.

All of it, good or bad, was about to last for the rest of your lives, together. A couple of months more to wait until you would both say yes and be each other’s for a lifetime…

Sometimes, he wondered if things would have been different if you had met under different circumstances. Instead of bumping – quite literally – into each other in this supermarket… what if you had met and started dating knowing who he was? Would he have opened up so easily then? Would he have let himself be drawn to you with such a force?

But then again, you didn’t know who he was back then. And he was thankful for it. He hadn’t had to worry about the fame, about you being earnest, about money… none of that mattered, not between the two of you.

He was just Ben with you, and it was enough. And you were just Y/N, and it was enough.

“Are you even listening at this point?”

Ben shook himself out of his dreamy state, looking away from your shimmering ring and up to your eyes again. He wanted to drown in their colour forever…

You were amused more than annoyed, head tilted to the side and a playful smile on your lips.

“You’re talking about Francis breaking the coffee machine. Again,” he answered with a cocky smile. “Of course, I’m listening, love.”

“You seemed to have zoned out for a moment,” you explained before eating the last bite of your dessert.

“Was just… kind of lost in thought, I guess. But I was listening.”

“What were you thinking about? You were smiling, it ought to be nice.”

His smile widened, something mischievous and flirtatious added to the crooked gesture.

“I was thinking about this,” he answered, nodding towards your ring. “And about all the naughty things we’ll do on our honeymoon.”

You laughed, choking on the piece of fruit you were eating. And God, did he adore that sound…

“And… what kind of thoughts these might be? Are you making plans?” you asked back, flirt lowering your voice too, and Ben couldn’t help the way his heart jumped in his chest at the sound.

“I am, actually,” he fought back, leaning a little across the table, a dangerous glint darkening his black eyes. “I have a full list, at this point… of things I’m going to do to you.”

He noticed your sharp intake of breath, and leaned back in his chair, winking at you in a seductive way, making you nervously giggle.

“Can’t wait for that, then… Can I get a preview?”

Ben let out a loud laugh, shaking his head.

“No way, I’m keeping that for later. We should relax this afternoon.”

“Sex is… relaxing…”

“No…” Ben shook his head, amused.

Instead, Ben ended up doing the dishes while you settled on the sofa and looked for something to watch on TV. You went through the channels, until Ben’s face appeared on the screen.

“Oh! Honey! You’re on TV!”

Ben chuckled, putting away the last plate before walking inside the living room to join you. Indeed, his face was on the screen; a shaven, much younger version of himself.

“Oh, it’s Narnia,” he said with a fond smile on his lips as some of his friends appeared on the screen as well.

He sat by your side on the sofa and immediately snuggled against you, rolling his eyes as you whistled when he was on the screen again, playfully catcalling him.

“My… my… look at this handsome guy, right there!” you teased, pinching his side, and Ben couldn’t help but blush.

“Not bad, huh? Is he your type?” he asked, playing along, the red reaching the tip of his ears.

He tried hard to refrain a grin, but he couldn’t.

“Definitely! He looks a little like my fiancé, you see?”

“Oh, I see…”

You both exploded with laughter, unable to keep a straight face for much longer.

“You are definitely my type,” you went on. “God… even then, I had a crush on you!”

Ben frowned, looking at you questioningly.

“What do you mean?”

He squeezed your thigh, the feeling of your body against him reassuring.

“Well… even as Caspian, I had a crush on you.”

“When?”

His frown deepened, and he couldn’t help the way his heart sped up all of a sudden. Because… you couldn’t be meaning that. You didn’t know who he was when you met…

“I mean that when I watched Narnia for the first time, I had a crush on Caspian. So… on you… kind of.”

“But when did you watch it?”

“When it came out! I went to see these movies with some friends at the time.”

You seemed puzzled by his reaction, and perhaps it was normal for you to do so. You frowned, the small crease forming across your brow. And perhaps it was but logical for you to react like that, but Ben didn’t think so. Instead, he merely stared at you, frowning hard, almost glaring, his jaw clenched tight, all of a sudden…

“What?” you asked, even more taken aback as Ben sat up, letting go of you completely.

You knew him before you met. You knew who he was that day, in the supermarket, and during your first date and…

You had a crush on him already? What… if you knew who he was then… had you ever been interested in him back then? That rainy afternoon when you bumped so hard into him in this supermarket he fell over?

He couldn’t control the way his heart was racing, the growing feeling that was crushing his chest more and more. This feeling, so painful, of… betrayal…

“Ben? What’s wrong, honey?”

He got up at the sound of the nickname.

Was it real? From the beginning? And why had you not told him you knew who he was? What was your plan? Were you… were you lying about the two of you?

“You’ve never told me,” he spoke at last, voice low and shaking with an anger he struggled to control.

You shrugged; and Ben hated you for it. Because everything was crumbling around him, his mind was spiralling, and you were… shrugging?

“What about it? I love these movies. Haven’t watched them in ages, though…”

“When we met… when we went on our first date, you never told me you knew who I was.”

You frowned hard, failing to understand why he seemed angry now, why his voice was so low, a rumble of upcoming thunder.

“I didn’t recognize you at first,” you admitted. “Not in the supermarket. Not before you told me your full name, and that you were an actor.”

“That was on our first date! Why didn’t you tell me then?”

But again, you shrugged, at a loss for words. And he could see it in your eyes: that you didn’t understand what was happening, why he was mad, what you had done wrong.

Ben tried to take a few deep breaths, in an attempt to slow down his pounding heart and to clear his head. But it didn’t work well…

“What does it matter, anyway?” you asked, and Ben scoffed in response, running a hand through his hair in frustration.

“You should have told me…”

“Why? It was ages ago… who cares?”

“I care!” he replied, raising his voice, the announced storm finally reaching the surface, making the air heavy and filled with electricity.

“I don’t understand,” you admitted, keeping your voice low and calm, but it didn’t soothe Ben’s anger.

“I thought… You said you hadn’t watched anything I was in. You lied!”

“I didn’t lie! At the time, you had just finished working on the Punisher, and I hadn’t watched that.”

Four years… that was too long ago, he couldn’t remember the exact words that were spoken. And perhaps you were right. Perhaps you had never claimed to have never watched anything he had been in but were only unaware of the project he was working on at the time. Perhaps he had been the one distorting your words a little. But it didn’t matter. Ben was still angry, even if he might be in the wrong.

Because it meant that… how could he trust you now? How could he know that you were the one? That he he was enough?

“Did you go on a date with me because I’m an actor?”

It was your turn to be hurt, he read it in your eyes.

“What?”

“Did you accept to go on a date with me only because I’m an actor? Just for the clout?”

“How dare you!” you protested, standing up as well, hurt mingling now with anger. “Of course not! Who do you think I am?”

“I don’t know… I’m not sure to know that anymore…”

“What do you mean?”

“I thought you went on a date with me, and then became my girlfriend because you… not because of the fame, or the money or…”

“Of course, I didn’t! What’s next, you’re gonna call me a whore and claim I only slept with you for money? I don’t need your money, and I never have!”

“I didn’t say that…”

“You’d better not! Besides, let’s bring your ego down a notch, because you might be talented, but you’re not a superstar either, Ben.”

“No need to be mean.”

“You’re basically saying I’ve slept with you for money! How is that not insulting?”

But Ben was less and less convincing at hiding his hurt behind his anger. Because there were tears at the corners of his angry gaze, and a shakiness in his voice due to a tightened throat; and if he clenched his jaw and fists now, it was to hide the fear that crept within his heart.

Because if you had fantasized on this person he wasn’t… was it what you saw in him? Was it what you saw at the beginning, at least?

Because he thought that he was enough, but then again… was he? Had you fallen in love with him or with the image of him you already liked?

“What about the fantasy of it then? What about that crush on someone I’m not?” he spat, holding onto the rage to hide the fragility he longed to forget.

“What are you even talking about?”

“Was I a fantasy to you?”

“What?!”

“You heard me.”

“What do you mean ‘a fantasy’?”

“Well, I don’t know… Apparently you had a crush on me before we even met! Or, to be more precise, you had a crush on someone I am not.”

He expected you to keep your voice high, maybe to raise your voice even more. But you didn’t. Instead, he was taken aback as you visibly relaxed, as your gaze softened, as you heaved a sigh.

“Ben… what’s wrong? For real?”

“I told you what was wrong! You lied, and now… I don’t even know if this is real anymore. Us. Our whole relationship… we were supposed to get married!”

“Were?”

“I don’t know anymore.”

But he regretted these words as soon as they passed his lips. Because despite his stupid doubts, he loved you with all his heart. You were the one, he knew it.

Why was he pushing you away like this, then?

But you didn’t fall for it, didn’t follow him down this path of anger he was opening for you. Instead, you wrapped your arms around him, holding him tightly, and he was so taken aback that he didn’t protest, nor moved away.

“I love you,” you said, your voice soothing again, warm and reassuring, your natural tone. “I love you more than anything. And this has nothing to do with your job, or with whether or not I liked Caspian years ago. I fell in love with you on our seventh date when you got us lost on our way to the beach because you have no sense of direction whatsoever.”

He rolled his eyes, but you weren’t fooled. You could feel the muscles of his back relaxing under your hands.

“I love you, Ben. You know I do. So… what is this all about?”

He shrugged, looking away so you wouldn’t see that he was holding back tears.

How could he say it? That he was terrified all over again that one day you would change your mind. That one day, you wouldn’t think as him being enough…

Because it happened before, but you didn’t really know that. It happened, over and over again. Because people expected him to be someone else, and they fell for his public image at first, for a fictional character, and then they woke up next to him and they just… disappeared. Because disappointment always drove people away.

But this time around, it was different. You were different. You made him feel so safe, so confident, so loved… if you turned up to dismiss him just like the others, Ben wasn’t certain he would be able to overcome it this time around.

But he couldn’t tell you that.

It was okay, though, he didn’t really have to. You read it in his eyes when you caught his gaze for a second before he could look away once more, you noticed it in his clenched jaw and the slight shaking of his hands, you saw it in the fear that he tried to hide still but was painted in every crinkle of his handsome face.

“There’s no need to push me away,” you spoke in the softest voice, and he felt safe all over again. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m not leaving. I’m happy with you. And I don’t care about anything but being with you. With the real you. The one waking up way too early on Sundays, and who gets lost everywhere he goes, and always has to make lists for everything, and sings all the time, and cuddles me every morning, and worries about our tickets way too much when we leave for a vacation and… You. Just you. I just want to be with you, Ben. Everything else doesn’t matter. Okay? Do you understand? I don’t need anything more, as long as I can spend my life loving you.”

You could have gone on, but Ben suddenly wrapped his arms around you as well, finally reciprocating your gesture, and he held you tightly, so tightly you could hardly breathe, but you didn’t mind.

You heard him sniffing as he buried his face into your hair, breathed deeply the sweet scent of your shampoo.

He was being ridiculous… this was ridiculous… You were right. You loved him. And he loved you… God, he loved you so damn much, it physically hurt…

“I’m sorry,” he breathed, trying to calm down, anger slowly being replaced by this sense of fragility he was desperate to avoid. “I didn’t… I’m sorry. It was pretty ridiculous, right?”

“It’s okay.”

“I… I guess I had a little… insecurity crisis for a moment.”

“Yeah, I got that. I don’t really understand why though.”

“It’s just… I’m afraid sometimes that people don’t like me as much as they like the idea they have of me. Do you understand?”

Slowly, you nodded, he felt your head moving against his cheek and shoulder.

“I see. But I don’t care about that. I love you for who you are.”

It was his time to nod.

“It’s just… I’m worried sometimes that one day you’ll realize I’m just me, nothing more. And that… I’m not… that I can’t get you more than that. More than me.”

“But you’re everything I need, Ben. You’re enough. You’re so much more than enough, actually.”

Finally, he smiled, grinned even, you felt the gesture against your skin as he pressed his lips to your temple.

“I feel very stupid. I’m sorry,” he apologized in a whisper.

“It’s alright.”

“Are you mad?”

“No, I’m not. I think you could have handled that better, but it’s okay. Do you still want to watch a movie with me?”

He chuckled, pulling away just enough to gently hold your face in both his hands, and kiss you for a rather long time. If any trace of anger had remained in your heart, it was fully gone after this loving gesture.

He offered you a grateful smile when you finally opened your eyes again.

“I will always want to watch movies with you, my love. Even when I act like an idiot.”

***************************************

Taglist: @reg-arcturus-black @wolfmoonmusic

[coleskingdom]

Bang Bang BBQ

Jay White x F Reader

Minors DNI 18+

@midwestmade29 @madhatterbri

“Which one of you is manning the grill today?” Colten asked walking into the backyard with a cooler. Jay was busy spraying his beloved plants, while I was prepping the grill. “ She is” spraying me with the mister. “ I learned a long time ago not to argue with her over the grill, potato salad , iced tea or what goes in chili. She might brand me if I tried to take those tongs away from her.” his attention solely dedicated to the marigolds. “ I like her meat better anyway….” Jays glare on Colten “ I mean her cooking “ I laughed at the scene, Austin in a pool floaty, Juice coming down the slide in to the pool. Colten in trouble as usual,, and Jay relaxed mostly. “ Jay leave him be, bless his heart” as I put the steaks on the grill.

Jay came up behind me “ if I leave him alone, then my attention is going to be solely on you” I jumped when I felt an ice cube, between his lips as he ran it down my neck. “Behave” I whispered, “ No” as he dropped the cube down my back. “ You’re the one who wanted to have a bbq remember” as I turned to face him, “True but you weren’t thrilled with the idea of Toronto and being without me. So this was the compromise a few steaks, a few drinks, some sunshine, the boys it’s going to be fun.” Kissing me, and slapping my ass as he went to jump in the pool.

The afternoon passed easily and I was setting the table for dinner , all the stuff I knew they loved but didn’t treat themselves to. Steak and chicken , potatoes, corn, cole slaw, banana pudding . “Boys dinners ready” the conversation flowed easily as everyone filled their plates. “ Jay says that it was his promo skills that made you fall for him. Is that true?” Colten asked cutting into his steak “ No, that would’ve meant that. I fell for King Switch and not Jay” my hand reaching for Jays. “ Now that is some revisionist history” Juice choked out “Truth is boys , there was no separation between King Switch and Jay. Do you remember the promo you cut on Great O Khan, and her face turned so red, I don’t even think they’d been on a date yet. He was talking about how he was the dominator, and to get on your knees open your mouth . Hell phantasmo didn’t know what to say. Hell she didn’t know where to look.” his laughter cutting off the story. “ Juicey, she can tell her version, and I’ll know what really happened.” His wink made the table laugh squeezing my hand.

Juice could tell by my face that I really wanted the topic dropped “ Boys, I think I’ve got that video bookmarked” his eyebrows wiggling at me, I loved and hated everything that Juice was at times like this. I started to get up from the table to get something from the kitchen, when Jay leaned over to whisper “Stay, he’s just messing with you, besides that promo brings back some memories “his grin mischievous as a wave of heat ran through me. Juice managed to play the promo over the Bluetooth speaker, Colten and Austin couldn’t stop laughing at the King Switches Bitch, meanwhile my mind drifted to a different set of memories. I had never been one for casual hookups but there was something about the aura of King Switch when he came to pick me up for dinner that night we never made it. I had been so forward that night driven by pure lust, I knew even if it was a one night thing I would’ve had no regrets about being King Switch’s Bitch.

About the third time through, Jay looked at me and nodded we both got up from the table. Juice clearly entertaining the boys .

“Jay what are you doing ?” as he pulled me inside the pantry, his mouth on mine kissing me deeply. “ Sweet girl, if they only knew, who the real dominator in this relationship is.” his hands reaching for the strings of the bikini top, untying it as his hands moved , down my body. “ that I may be King Switch but I’ve always been your bitch” as his mouth moved down my breast grazing his teeth along it, he planted hurried kisses, down my stomach,his arm swiping items off the counter as he picked me up and put me there. “Jay someone is gonna hear us” my words coming out shaky, as he undid the swimsuit bottom. “ It wouldn’t be the first time Juice had heard us, I’d dare the other two to even mention it. “ his beard nuzzling the inside of my thigh,his hands parting my legs, “ Sweet girl, I’m on my knees , my eyes open, thanking you” as his mouth found my clit, I moaned my hands in his hair, he continued licking and sucking, my hands pulling him in deeper. “ Jay, please need you” he continued until my legs started to tremble. He inserted two fingers pumping in and out his forearm flexing his mouth sucking a little harder as I came hard, his mouth and fingers fucking me through it. “You’re so fucking beautiful, if we had more time, I’d fuck you properly.” kissing my thigh. He handed me a bottle of water, as he cleaned me with paper towel. He retied my swimsuit, kissed me again as I nuzzled into him. “They’re gonna know” I said into his shoulder his laugh “ Oh sweet girl, there’s no denying it. Absolutely not one bit. “ taking my hand and leading me back outside.

[calierez]

Ice Skating

"Everything's going to be okay, right?" Leo had been doing nothing but trying to calm his girlfriend down since morning, though he couldn’t quite understand why she was so nervous—there really wasn’t anything to worry about.

With Christmas approaching soon, a new ice rink had opened near the center of Indianapolis. Not many people knew about it yet, so it was relatively quiet, something Leo and Calypso had to take advantage of.

"I’ve never stood on these in my life," the brunette complained as she tied her pure white skates. Her hands shook as she made the last knot and stood up on the unfamiliar footwear. She nearly lost her balance but quickly extended her arms and barely managed to stay on her feet.

Leo smiled at her proudly. "See, that's the first step to success."

"Save the philosophical crap, Valdez!"

She tossed her caramel-colored braid over her shoulder and exhaled as she finally steadied herself on the skates. She was relieved she hadn’t fallen yet. Not just because she hated falling, but also because she absolutely did not want to embarrass herself in front of her boyfriend. She had been living in the mortal world for just under a year, getting acquainted with many new things, but she was starting to feel extremely self-conscious. Calypso wondered how long it would take before Leo lost patience with her.

She was staring at the ground, but when she heard a creaking sound, she looked up just in time to face him. The brunette placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, his expression somewhat worried. "It’s going to be okay, alright?" She wanted to push his hand away. She could feel the heat rising in her cheeks, and she didn’t doubt for a second that she must look like a chili pepper to him now. She looked down at the ground again.

"Where are your skates?" she asked, frowning at him.

"In the bag."

"Then put them on," she crossed her arms over her chest and gave him a slightly annoyed look. Surely he wasn’t planning to leave her to do this alone, was he?

Leo looked reluctant, clearly not eager to do so. It had been a long time since he last stood on skates, and many times it hadn’t gone well. Growing up in Houston, where it was constantly warm, getting to an ice rink was a rare opportunity, and when he was a bit older, he occasionally went skating with his school. A memory flashed through his mind of his first high school, where he went skating with Piper and Jason. Jason. Leo blinked sadly. Even that wasn’t a real memory. He really hated Hera for messing with his mind like that.

Calypso noticed his expression and hobbled closer to him, placing her hand on his chest. The young man had grown a lot recently, so she could no longer tease him about being short. She had to tilt her head to look into his eyes. She placed her hand on his cheek and gently stroked it. "I’m not going anywhere without you."

He smirked. "No?"

"No."

"What if it starts melting under me, huh?" he raised an eyebrow at her, curious about what she would say. "It definitely won’t. You're not that hot," she smiled so sweetly that her eyes sparkled. Those beautiful brown eyes. Oh God, how he loved them. How he loved her. She turned her back to him and crouched down by the bench, reaching for the bag and pulling out a pair of black leather skates.

"Be careful," Leo reminded her, as he was quite worried that she might accidentally cut herself on the blades. She motioned for him to sit down. "You’re not actually going to put them on for me, are you?" he laughed as he plopped down on the wooden bench, and she gave him a strange look. "Why not?"

He smirked. "Okay, Mom," Valdez teased her, earning himself a poke in the side. He yelped, but he noticed how the former goddess tried to hide her smile while tying his left skate. He absolutely loved making her laugh. Under any circumstances. "You little idiot," she murmured with a smile. "Whoever isn’t funny lives in vain," he shrugged. She sighed, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, and moved on to his right foot, finishing it just as quickly as the first one.

When Calypso tied the lace, she stood up, proud of herself for staying so balanced on her skates. She held out her hand to her boyfriend. Leo took it and let her help him up. The skates felt strange, but not painfully so, so he figured it was fine. The feeling of putting them on for the first time at the ice rink came back to him.

Calypso saw the familiar melancholy in his eyes and knew it all too well.

His cheeks warmed slightly, and a swarm of butterflies exploded in his stomach as he realized how close he was to his beautiful girlfriend. He lowered his head to get a little closer to the brunette. Their noses almost touched. Calypso smiled and then pulled back, saying, "So, shall we go?"

He wasn’t sure whether to feel disappointed, but he brushed it off and squeezed her hand, not letting go since she’d helped him to his feet. She led him to the ice rink, where a pleasant, soft music wafted along with the noise of other people.

She expected the ice to be slippery and for her foot to slide as soon as she took a step, but that didn’t happen. Instead, she stayed in place, getting used to the new environment. Leo’s warm hand gave her comfort and even courage. Thanks to him being there, she didn’t feel like giving up.

She lifted her chin to glance at him through her lashes. Leo slowly stepped onto the ice and held his ground just as well as she did. He let go of her, and the brunette’s eyes widened in panic as she quickly grabbed onto the barrier, which was less than a meter away. She held on tightly with both hands while watching Leo start to skate. She admired how well he managed and felt a pang of discomfort under her ribs. She wanted to give him some time to get used to the ice and remember how to skate, but she was also afraid he might abandon her. She tried to move her foot, but she felt the blades under her feet sliding strangely across the ice and clung even more tightly to the barrier.

"Sunshine!"

She turned at the sound of his cheerful voice. He was grinning mischievously at her from his spot in the middle of the rink. It looked like he’d already gotten the hang of his skates and had learned to move on them again. People swirled around him, either by themselves or with their loved ones and children. She wished they could skate like that too. But she could barely take a step.

"Come on, Cal!" he shouted to her, waving. She closed her eyes tightly, hesitating whether to let go or not. Why had she never learned to skate during her long, divine life? Why had it never occurred to her? She cursed herself for it, but now she had no choice but to learn. Calypso held onto the barrier with one hand, placing one foot in front of the other. She didn’t have the courage to move more yet and wanted to get used to the surface under her feet like this.

"You're doing great, sweetheart!" She heard her boyfriend’s voice as he skated over to her. He looked so natural. And she felt a bit annoyed with him. "You told me you didn’t know how to skate."

"No, no," he argued. "I said I hadn’t done it in a long time," he smirked.

"What’s the difference?"

"Running out of arguments?"

"You’re an idiot," that was the only thing he understood because, in the next moment, Calypso started cursing in Minoan, and Leo couldn’t understand a word.

He smiled. She always did that when she felt cornered. He gently took her hand. "Let go," he advised, and to his surprise, she listened. He took her other hand and tried to guide her. "You have to do it like this." He moved his feet in a way that made it clear what he wanted her to do. "Kind of push off," he explained. She tried to mimic the movement. "You push off with one foot, glide, and push off with the other. It’s nothing."

"I’d say it’s a lot," she mumbled sulkily, but she did exactly what Leo wanted her to do. "See?" praised Hephaestus’s son as soon as he noticed. It always brought him immense joy when Cal learned something new, whether it was from him or someone else. "Now try it on your own."

As soon as he said it, she looked at him desperately, uncertain if she could manage it alone.

He offered her a reassuring smile and skated backward almost to the center of the rink so he could still see her. Don’t be afraid, he mouthed to her. She hated it when he did that. She had just found her balance, and he was already pushing her like this. She inhaled through her nose and then exhaled. Alright, she told herself. There’s definitely nothing hard about this—just push, glide, push.

She took a better position and moved her push-off foot back, which shifted her slightly forward. It wasn’t much, but it was definitely some progress. She did the same with the other foot and smiled. She lifted her head and found her boyfriend with her eyes. "Leo! I’m skating!" she screamed at him, ecstatic.

"Good job!" Leo praised her, his heart nearly skipping a beat as he watched her. He was so proud of her. But then, suddenly, he lost his balance and flopped onto the ice. Damn gravity, he cursed inwardly.

Calypso miraculously managed to skate over to him and plopped down beside him, grinning like the sun.

"Hey, looks like you did it," he said.

"Seems like it," she replied.

The girl leaned in and gently kissed him on the lips. In that moment, Leo realized he was warming up. He could slowly feel the ice beneath him starting to melt, but right now, he didn't care if he ended up with a wet backside because it was totally worth it.

[whoahoney]

Alright yall, Deftones/septum piercing boy turned into a ghost, may he rest in peace 💀 but never fear….

the Pizza Guy is here. 😏👀

That’s right, a new white boy of the month in Honeyland but that’s okay, I’ve decided to award him white boy of the month, every month for the rest of the year (at least) because he’s my BOYFRIEND!

he actually asked me and everything, like whaaaat?

I love the story of how we met so much so imma write it out a little bit before I toy with turning it into an Eddie fic like I did with the chilis waiter 💀🫶🏻

Read on if you’re interested in my weird love life, it’s appreciated but never required!

TW: pregnancy sickness, crush on someone other than your shitty ass husband (it’s okay we’re divorced now 🥳😂)

Basically back in 2021, I was heavily pregnant with my second child and alllllways craving pizza. I already order dominos often enough they know my name and order when I come in, but it was much more often than normal while I was growing a human 😂

One day, I go to pick up my order at the dominos hot spot in town and there is a handsome Covid-masked boy there waiting for me.

I’d never seen him before so I knew he was new. I got shy and just accepted the pizza, trying to get back into my car as quickly as possible. But then he gave me the loveliest smile and wished me a good day and I thought about it a smidge longer than a married woman should.

The next time I saw him, he gave me tons of paper plates and napkins and full shakers of pepper and Parmesan, and that became a regular occurrence I didn’t think too much of. (Turns out he was STEALING FROM WORK)

The next time, he asked me about how I was feeling, about my baby, and what his name was going to be.

And then the next time, I was late picking up my order, and it’s protocol to call the customer in that instance, so he calls me and asks if I’m okay. Truth be told, I wasn’t 💀 I had BARFED all over myself (cause pregnant) as I was driving over there. I was so upset, clamoring around my car searching for an old hoodie to pull on, but I couldn’t find anything 🥲

Obviously I wasn’t going to tell him all that, so I told him I’d be there momentarily, that I had just been sick.

He offers to drive it to me, free of charge, but I was almost there anyway.

He didn’t even acknowledge the puke on my shirt and gave me the same smile he always did (that I couldn’t see cause of the mask lmao) and told me to be careful going home.

lemme tell you that when I got back, I had a text from an unknown number asking if I got home okay 🥺 my friend was utterly convinced this dude had the hots for me but I was married and pregnant so I had a hard time hoppin on that bandwagon, “it’s not like anything’s going to happen anyway”

I’d say a month after that, I stopped seeing him and assumed he’d moved onto bigger and better things than dominos.

Cut to January 2024, I’m swiping on bumble, minding my business and I see the cutest guy in a Metallica shirt eating noodles straight from the pot over the sink. I was already set on swiping right, but then I looked further at his profile and lo and behold, a selfie in a familiar domino’s uniform!! It had to be him.

I swipe right, we MATCH, I confirm it’s him, he REMEMBERS ME, and we plan a date.

He suggested that we meet at our “old spot” and he’d bring dinner.

And what does he bring??

A dominos pizza and a dozen red roses. 🥺

Turns out my friend was right, he confirmed that he had a “huge little crush” on me and that he’d bargain with the other drivers to get my order if it wasn’t his to take 😭 he’d give them the tips I’d give him if he ever had to convince someone to switch with him 🥲

I’ve dated some very kind and respectful people since July 2023 but this guy blows them all out of the water 😭

He’s so communicative, his boundaries and emotional intelligence are unmatched, we have the same taste in music, his love languages are the same as mine, he’s also a single father (and absolutely rocks it), we share the same values, every day he’s surprising me with some lore of his, or his kindness, or thoughtful nature 🥺

he plans every date, sends me his work schedule so I know when I can come in for a surprise visit if I want to, he brings me snacks, pays for and pumps my gas, opens every door, and won’t even let me lift a finger in my own house!!! All without me asking.

And don’t get me started on the sex bro… I— I can’t. 🥲🫠😮‍💨

If you read this far, I love you, I hope you’re doing well, I miss my tumblr/eddie hyper fixation so much, but I feel it coming back 🤍 I hope to finish our beloved stories and give them all the endings they/we deserve 😌🥰

Xx

Honey

[shiroikabocha]

the process goes like this for me:

- an acquaintance who has worked in commercial kitchens makes a humorously scathing comment about someone else’s inefficient pepper-slicing technique

- this acquaintance was not commenting on how *I* slice peppers—has never seen me slice a pepper, has no reason to ever be in my kitchen while I slice peppers—and this person’s context for judging knife work is based on commercial kitchens where speed and efficiency are vital. I am a home cook. I am not slicing peppers in the same context. the acquaintance was not talking about me.

- regardless, when I am alone in my home, slicing peppers with breathtaking inefficiency—headphones IN, audiobook ON, picking out seeds with my fingers, changing up my knife angle every third or fourth slice, taking HOURS to turn a pile of farmer’s market peppers into a pile of vegetable confetti—I’m plagued by a lingering sense of shame. I am doing this wrong. I am doing this stupid. I am bad at this. It is vital that I don’t let anyone see me doing this (slicing vegetables alone in my own home).

- (somewhere, out there, there is a group chat sharing screenshots of something I did badly. they are bonding over it. they have never met me and never will. I exist in minds I will never meet, and the whole of my existence there is: remember that one chick who said the dumb shit about overnight oats? lol what a fucking retard. realistically, that shouldn’t bother me; if anything I should be happy that I have given someone something to be joyfully annoyed by. I am a source of joy for people I’ve never met. people will laugh and smile because of me. that should make me feel good. I have increased the happiness in the world.)

- despite the flawless logic for why I should not feel bad, I feel quite bad. slicing peppers alone in my home. inefficiently. I’ve built a really unpleasant panopticon on the inside of my head and I don’t like it, but I don’t know how to unbuild it so I put the peppers in the chili pot to simmer for a few hours (don’t think about it) pop a weed edible (stop thinking about it) and put on a nature documentary (think about something else)

- (if you built a prison in your brain, then you can probably build a sanctuary there, too. build a place inside yourself where the thoughts aren’t hurting you. go to there. you’re allowed to have a place inside yourself where none of the thoughts are about being seen. it’s okay. when you build your mental clubhouse, you don’t have to stuff it full of imaginary copies of all the people who have ever criticised you. you are allowed to be alone in the nice room inside yourself. you cannot leave the panopticon, but you can hide for a little bit.)

- get kinda horny watching the nature documentary for Reasons That Need Not Be Explored and forget that I’ve been slicing hot spicy peppers for an hour

- regret everything. everything that has ever happened.

- repeat indefinitely

[i-can-even-burn-salad]

Word Find Tag

I was tagged by @kaylinalexanderbooks <3

My words: accept, appreciate, access, advice

Your words: bleed, breathe, behave, bargain

And I am tagging, if you want to do it, @sarandipitywrites @aria-benedetto @pleasestaywithmedarling @winterandwords and as always an open tag

Those are wonderful words. They all appear in Sweet Little Lies (WIP Intro), and only 1-3 times each 😅

Accept

“Oh Laurent, do you think I’m that naive? Do you think I believed for one second you were just taking a nice evening stroll when…” She didn’t finish her sentence. She didn’t think he’d be talking to her about this if there were people in earshot, but she wasn’t going to risk it. “I have long accepted that you treat the truth as an option rather than a necessity.” “And yet you’re here with me,” he mumbled. “And yet I am here with you.”

Appreciate

“How are the Fiery Wastrels selling?” he asked. “Not at all. I don’t have many customers I would inflict that upon.” “But you do have customers you would inflict that upon?” Aurelia laughed again. With him around, she found herself laughing and smiling more than ever. “Two or three,” she admitted. “Don’t worry, you’re safe. No ginger, and no chili.” “I appreciate it.”

Access

“I’ve been thinking,” he said. He was sitting on the stairs. “Some of those old buildings have direct access to the sewers. Do you know if this one has?” “I don’t think so?” “Hm.” His breathing turned strained as he pulled himself up. “You mentioned a backdoor. I didn’t see one?” “It’s in the storage room. I never use it.” “Mind if I check?”

Advice

Was it too early to call it love? Every time he visited, with every teasing word, every stolen touch, and every thoughtful gesture, she fell a bit more for him. He seemed earnest in his intentions but moved slowly, and Aurelia had the feeling that if she wanted more, she would have to take the next step. A few times, she had gotten close. When he said farewell in that tone that promised he would come back and took her hand with fingers that were so warm and gentle. She opened the window and let the nightly breeze cool her glowing cheeks. Some of the others had seeing partners. Perhaps she could ask them for advice.

[johnsbleu]

Wait omg could u write a little snippet it of like when reader was prego and she was having those hormone lash outs and john trying to be understanding but so confused one minute shes crying the next shes mad

ask and you shall receive.

under the cut is something i just whipped up real quick. might not be exactly what you wanted but i wrote it with the amount of time i had. if i had more time, i probably wouldn't have stopped until it was 10k lmao

This is not the current timeline. It's from when she was pregnant with Ronan. John's POV, 2.3k words

“Okay, you got your list?”

Y/N holds it up and smiles, tilting her head back, “Thank you for going.”

I look out the window and see the rain coming down in thick windy sheets, “No reason you need to get all wet.”

“I can think--” she puts her head down and laughs, “Never mind. I shouldn’t finish that sentence.”

“Well, I think you should.” I say, and she looks at me. I give her a quick kiss, “I’ll be back. I love you. Call me if you need anything.”

She nods her head and salutes, “You got it, Wick.”

I take one last look at her before I pull the hood up on my coat and run out to the car.

__

I got more than what she wanted, but with it raining so much, I know that neither of us will want to leave the house. It’s the perfect weather to just lounge around and watch movies, plus it’s a little on the cooler side, so there’s currently a crock-pot in the kitchen full of chili. We’re going to have a date night in and watch a movie and each some chili. I can’t wait. I love my wife’s chili recipe too.

“I’m back,” I say, looking up to see Y/N coming into the kitchen, “I got everything on your list, and then some. I got…the Flamin’ Hot Cheetos and whipped cream cheese.”

Y/N hums loudly and reaches for it as I watch her in curiosity, “I’ve been thinking about this lately. Baby girl wants some spicy food. I love Cheetos, so I thought it would be good to try this.”

I watch as she opens the cream cheese, which she specified had to be whipped, not regular, then she scoops some of it up with a Cheeto. She takes a bites and chews a few times before scooping up some more. She scrunches her face up and looks at me, still chewing.

“Well?”

“Um, not really that great. I mean, it’s good, but it’s not as great as I thought it would be.” she says, scooping up more, “I’ll still eat it though.”

I laugh as I reach in and get a few more things out that she wanted. I set the ice cream down on the counter and smile proudly, but her face falls which makes my stomach sink.

“This is the kind you always get, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” she says in a soft and quiet voice, “But it’s not the…it’s fine.”

I furrow my brow when I see her tearing up, “Baby, talk to me.”

“It’s not the kind I wanted,” she says, absentmindedly playing with the wrapper, and I stand there staring for a moment in pure confusion.

She is absolutely not the type of person to cry over the wrong ice cream. She’s the type to eat it anyway since it was bought. This isn’t the first time I’ve accidentally bought the wrong thing, but she’s never made a fuss about it.

“It’s the chocolate and peanut butter kind that you like,” I say, walking over to stand next to her, “You just wrote ice cream, so I thought--”

“Oh, right, it’s my fault! You had one job and it was to get the ice cream I wanted!” she says, then she puts her head down and cries harder, “Sorry! I’m not mad! I’m just…I’m a little sad. I didn’t want this kind.”

I place my hand on her back, “I can go back and exchange it. That’s no big deal.”

“No, it’s okay,” she says, despite the fact that she’s fully sobbing now.

She’s sobbing. Over ice cream. Surely there’s something else going on.

I don't know what to do so I just stand there like an idiot for a minute.

“I just really wanted that one brand we talked about, you know, the one that we tried.”

I furrow my brow as I look around, then it clicks, “Are you talking about when we went grocery shopping and they had samples?”

“Yeah!”

“Baby, that was over a month ago,” I say, but it just makes her cry harder. I immediately dig through the bag for the receipt and grab the carton of ice cream, “I’ll fix this. I’ll go get it for you right now.”

She shakes her head, “No, it’s okay. Really. I’m just being a baby.”

“No, you want what you want. I’ll be right back.” I kiss the top of her head and grab my keys off the table before quickly rushing back out to the car.

What my baby wants, she’s going to get.

I’m not even halfway down the street when I hear my phone ringing in my pocket. I dig it out and hold it to my ear.

“Everything okay?”

“You don’t have to go, John. It’s fine. I was just having a moment. I’m sorry.” she sniffles and laughs a little, “I’m sorry.”

I laugh, “It’s okay. I’m literally down the street from the grocery store. It’ll take me 10 minutes. I’ll be back before you know it. I’ll make sure to get the kind you want. What flavor?”

“Same flavor,” she says, and I start to laugh, “Just a different brand.”

“Okay, my love. I’ll be right back.”

I hear the smile in her voice when she says goodbye to me.

__

Despite the whole ice cream debacle a few days ago, things have been good. Y/N found a piece of fabric with a color she really liked for the baby’s room, so we ran into the hardware store to get it color matched. The problem was that they don’t do that at our tiny shop in Mill Neck. We were instructed to head to the big hardware store in Oyster Bay instead, which turned out to be good because I actually needed some new bolts for a few things. With a baby in the house soon, I want to make sure not a single thing falls off the walls. All of the furniture will be anchored to the wall in her room as well.

I’m not taking any chances.

“Excuse me,” a woman says, and I look over my shoulder at her, “Do you know where I can find water pumps?”

I shake my head, “No, I’m sorry. I’m not sure where that would be. I…I don’t work here.”

She laughs, touching my bicep, “I am so sorry. I just saw the dark blue shirt and assumed. I’m so sorry.”

“No problem,” I laugh, then I look up at the hanging signs above us that say what’s in each aisle, “If I had to guess, I would say bathroom stuff would be a few aisles down.”

“Okay, thank you.” she says, then she walks away.

I turn back to continue looking through the bolts, searching the size I need.

“What was that about?” Y/N asks, and I look over at her.

“Oh, she just wanted to know where water pumps would be.”

Y/N scoffs, “Water pumps. Sure.”

“Yeah, you know those pumps you put in your basement to get out water. I assume her basement flooded with all the rain we’ve had.”

“Yeah,” she says, then she scoffs again and looks at me, “I just knew this was going to happen.”

I furrow my brow and turn to face her, “What? They can’t do the paint here either? I guess we can go to Jimmy. I’m sure he knows someone who--”

“I just knew that once I got a belly and you would immediately not be interested in me anymore. I just knew you’d start to look at other women. You probably want a divorce."

I shake my head because I am confused. I’m standing here with boxes of bolts and screws in my hands, staring at my wife, so beyond confused. I just went on a 15 minute rant this morning about how beautiful she is, and I certainly didn’t go easy on her this morning when we were intimate. She’s sexy! She’s the sexiest she’s ever been, which is saying a lot because I’m fairly positive she’s the sexiest woman on this planet and that’s not a lie. I’m insanely attracted to her. I couldn’t keep my hands to myself before and I really can’t now.

“What are you talking about?” I tilt her chin up and look into her bloodshot eyes, “Honey, I am not looking at anyone but you.”

"Yeah, for now."

I tilt her chin up again, "You were there this morning. I know you know how crazy I am about you. I love you more than anything in this world, Y/N. You know this."

Y/N sniffles and closes her eyes as tears run down her cheeks, “I’m crazy.”

“You’re not crazy,” I say, bringing her into my arms, “You’re…”

She leans back and looks at me, narrowing her eyes, “I’m what?”

Her emotions have been all over the place. I’m not an idiot. I know what’s going on. Sure, when she freaked out about the ice cream the other day, I was confused at first, but then it all clicked into place. She’s hormonal and going through a lot right now. She cried over a laundry soap commercial on TV the other day, she got furious when they got our order wrong at lunch, which I will admit made me mad too since I reiterated many times that she didn’t want shrimp--she’s allergic and pregnant. She’s feeling everything on a much more intense level. I honestly feel bad. My wife always has such a cool demeanor and she’s always just relaxed and hanging out, but this past week has been rough!

“You’re feeling a lot of things right now and you’re not sure what to do with all those emotions.” I say as gently as I can since I don’t want to upset her, “Your body is going through a lot of changes right now.”

“I’m crazy, John.”

I laugh, “You’re not crazy, peach. You’re pregnant and feeling all of these emotions at once. It’s normal.”

I assume it’s normal. I don’t really know. I remember Tess was very emotional when she was pregnant.

Y/N stands back and exhales sharply, looking up at me, “I’m not gonna scare you away, am I?”

“Hell no,” I say, and she instantly smiles, “You could never scare me away. Not sure how thrilled you’ll be, but you’re stuck with me, peach. Forever.”

“Forever? Ugh, how horrid,” she jokes, then she wraps her arms around my waist, “I promise I’m getting better.”

I laugh, “You’re only six months pregnant. We have a few more months to go, so don’t make any promises.”

“Hey!” she playfully whacks my arm, “I’m trying! Give me a break. By the way, you did this to me!”

I laugh when she gestures to her belly, “Oh, I know. I actually like the little attitude you’ve been giving lately. Well, when it’s directed elsewhere. Not when it’s directed at me.”

“I’m trying not to direct it towards you, I hope you know that.”

Nodding my head, I smile, “I do.”

Y/N smiles, then it quickly fades, “I have to pee. Right this minute!”

I watch as she waddles a little and I grab the things I need before walking up to stand in line. I look around after a few minutes and see her coming back over to me with a huge smile on her face despite her red eyes. She links her arm around mine and tilts her head back to kiss me when I lean down. We walk up when it’s our turn, and the cashier glances at Y/N and furrows her brow a little when she sees her bloodshot eyes.

“Oh,” Y/N laughs, moving back a little to smooth her sweater over her growing belly, “Pregnancy hormones. I’m crying over everything. I cried over a laundry commercial the other day. The one with the little teddy bear. The little girl lost it but her dad found him, and he was all dirty, so he…took it and washed him and gave him…back.  I can’t even talk about it without getting choked up, oh my god!”

I look at her when she puts her head down, and I wrap my arm around her shoulder to pull her close. The cashier laughs and tells Y/N she’s not alone and that she was very emotional with her first baby too.

After I pay for our things, I take the bag and wrap my arm around Y/N’s shoulder as we walk out to the car. I smile when she watches me opening the car door for her, helping her in, then I rush back to the driver’s side.

“John, I’m serious,” she says, and I look at her, “I’m not always this crazy.”

“First of all,” I turn to her and take her hands, “You’re not crazy. Do you think that because you’re showing different emotions I’m going to think you’re crazy?”

She nods, “Yeah. I mean, I know that I’m pregnant but one minute I’m crying, then the next I’m mad about something like…you didn’t fold the towels right--which by the way, were folded right. I’m just--”

“Don’t say it!” I warn her, and she slouches. “Stop talking about my wife like that.”

“You’re not a mind reader and I need to realize that. I need to be more vocal with my wants and needs,” she says as I reach for her hand, “Especially during this time. I can’t get mad at you for not doing something when I didn’t even tell you in the first place. I really am sorry.”

I reach over and touch her chin, “I love you. I love all of your moods and emotions. I love seeing my sweet wife cry over a laundry soap commercial. I love this side of you.”

“It’s a freaking mess.” she says, laughing tearfully, “But thank you for loving me. It won’t last forever.”

“And even if it did, I would still love you anyway,” I cup her face and lean over to kiss her, “When I said I would love you forever, I meant that.”

She smiles as she rests her head back, “Forever is a really long time.”

“With you, it’s not long enough.”

I hold her gaze for a few moments before we both start to laugh. I absolutely meant it but I will admit it was a bit corny. She loved it though and she knows I meant it. I start the car and reach over to pat her thigh and she smiles at me, leaning over to kiss me.

“I kinda want some ice cream now.”

Looking over at her, I start to smile when I see the smirk on her face, “Tell me exactly what brand and flavor.”

[garbinge]

Charming Life (2/?)

Opie Winston x Teller!Sister OC Joanne ‘Jo’ Teller Gemma Teller x Jax Teller x Teller!Sister OC 

From these October Prompts:  “wow, dark already?”

A/N: I know myself well enough to know a prompt a day is a little ambitious but I really wanted to jump into some of those October dialogue prompts. SO I’m committing myself to a prompt a week for the month of October. Here’s week 4 out of 4. I hit my goal!!! Yaaaay! This was originally going to be a different fic but I’ve had Jo on my mind all day everyday so wanted to get this out!

Chapter Index

Word Count: 2.6k

Warnings: All my fics are 18+ regardless of content. Cursing, pining, angst, canon level mentions of drugs and jail. 

SOA Taglist: @drabbles-mc (Let me know if you’d like to be added!)

Jax pulled up to his mother’s house with his truck, the windows of both the house and truck were open, making it pretty easy to hear what was going on inside. The yelling and screaming was something Jax was used to, he grew up with it since his mother and sister tended to butt heads a lot, particularly on Gemma’s side of things. But this was different. He heard his sister’s voice over Gemma’s which was surprising. Jo never let herself yell the way Gemma did, it was her way of trying to be different for her own daughter, break generational curses and all that. So when Jax heard Jo yell he picked up the pace to see what was happening in the house. 

He barged into the door that opened into the kitchen to see Jo following Gemma around the dining room. Gemma seemed unbothered by Jo’s bickering, she was checking in on the various pots of chili and grocery bags that held ingredients to make more for the Taste of Charming fundraiser. 

“Are you fuckin’ listening to me?” Jo barked as Gemma turned around, clearly feeling whatever nerve Jo hit with her words or tone. The two were now face to face, expressions as cold as ice as they stared at each other. 

“Alright, chill out.” Jax’s voice boomed as made his way in between the two women. “What’s going on?” He was confused, while it wasn’t the first time he’s had to intervene between the two, it was the first time in a while. Since Jo had gotten pregnant with Dillon, the Teller women barely fought, it wasn’t that there wasn’t tension there, but they all learned how to live in harmony without explosive behavior. 

“Why don’t you tell him?” Jo smirked, not breaking her glare from Gemma. She knew pushing the topic on Gemma to tell Jax would be punishment enough for her mother. Jax would take Jo’s side on this, no question. 

Jo backed up letting Jax into the conversation. “The floor is yours, Gemma.” Jo didn’t let the smirk fall off her face. 

“I should smack that smile off that darling little face of yours.” Gemma placed her hands on her hips. 

“Mom!” Jax raised his voice. “Tell me what the fuck is going on?” 

“April Hobart asked me to talk with the club and let Kyle come to the fundraiser. See his kid play, he’s in the band.” Gemma let those last words come out almost as if she was trying to seem like she knew more than Jax. Which sure, Jax didn’t know the kid was in the band or that said band would be at the fundraiser, but that shit didn’t matter. That was Gemma trying to show rank. What Jax did know was that Kyle was the reason Opie had done 5 years in prison. He also knew that was why Jo was freaking out. 

“You gotta be fuckin’ kidding me.” Jax moved to look away from Gemma as his long blond hair moved from side to side as he shook his head and sucked his lip in with anger. 

“I already talked to Clay. He’s putting it up for a vote.” Gemma went back to checking over the groceries, she knew regardless of how her two kids felt, she had won the argument. 

Jax looked at Jo for back up in a way, but all she did was lift her hands up. Gemma had moved back into the kitchen, putting her focus on the pot of chili on the stove, leaving Jax and Jo in the dining room. 

“We’ve been fighting all morning about it, well, I have been. She hasn’t said a word to me.” Jo explained. “I was there when April came up to the booth, I think it’s genuine but I don’t think that asshole should be in a 10 mile radius of Charming.” Jo was getting worked up. 

Jax sighed, “Yea, I agree. It’s not gonna pass the club vote. Don’t stress too much about it.” Jax tried to comfort his big sister. 

“Sure, easy task.” Jo rolled her eyes as she snatched her bag up from the dining room table. 

“Few days at mom’s and you’re already back to fighting like we’re teenagers again.” Jax joked, before he was looking around the house, “where’s Dillon?” Jax seemed concerned. 

“Worry about your own shit, Jax.” Jo snapped back at him. “She’s not here, I wouldn’t act like that in front of her.” She felt disrespected by what Jax was insinuating. 

He held his hands up to declare surrender and innocence, “I was asking because I wanted to see if you were down for a ride to Ope’s, picking up some hand me down baby shit for Abel.” 

Jo backed down a little. “Sorry, I’m on edge.” She took a deep breath and played with the tassels on her bag. “Yea I could use the fresh air.” 

Jax laughed and made his way out of the house, leaving Gemma with nothing but a nod. 

The drive to Opie’s house wasn’t long, only a couple minutes from the Teller house. That was the charm of Charming, everything was close. 

“Haven’t seen you get that worked up in a while.” Jax said as he drove. 

“It’s just bullshit. Pure bullshit that Gemma is even entertaining the idea.” Jo shrugged. 

Jax kept silent and just nodded as he pulled up in front of Opie’s house. He was out of the car just as quick as he was driving up. He was halfway up the driveway before realizing he didn’t have company. With a glance over his shoulder he was squinting through the morning sun to look for Jo who was still in the car. 

“You comin’? Or what?” He was still close enough where he didn’t have to yell. 

“I’m gonna wait in the car.” Jo called out, praying he didn’t press for more information. Which he didn’t. Jax had speculations, he had thoughts, but never pressed Jo about them. He gestured with a nod and made his way to Opie’s backyard. 

Jo looked around at his house, the home he shared with Donna. Although, with the fact that he hadn’t been home in half a decade she had to assume it felt less and less like home to him these days, but none of that was her concern. Jo never had the privilege of concerning herself with anything about Opie’s life outside of a normal friendship, and even that was limited. Jax, Jo, and Opie grew up together, they were best friends, inseparable. And somewhere along the line, Jo fell in love with Opie, her brother’s best friend. But, he met Donna, and there was never any hate there. Truthfully, Jo wanted Opie to be happy, whatever that looked like. With or without her. But it didn’t stop her from feeling something when she saw him outside the club outings, especially here where it felt more real. Seeing their garage full of things, things that they shared together, the life they had together, it cut deep. 

She was brought back to reality when she heard voices and she looked to her right to see Jax and Opie making their way to the front yard with a couple baby items. Jax was walking towards the bed of the truck, piling things in while Opie stood in the front yard. Jo stayed in the car, her glance moved to catch what Jax was doing before it went back to Opie who lifted his hand up to wave. She offered a weak smile back accompanied by a wave before Jax was talking as he got back in the driver's seat but Jo was too occupied staring at Opie who was now standing there with Donna talking.

Somehow in the mix of all of it, a part of her appreciated Donna, and what she did for Opie, despite Donna’s feelings on the club, she was a mother and that was something Jo could understand and respect. Opie leaned down and kissed Donna, and that broke Jo’s stare as she looked over at her brother whose eyebrows were raised. 

“What?” Jo said on defense. 

Jax thought about mentioning it, saying something slick or even being genuine but he bit his tongue. 

“I was saying I didn’t tell him about Kyle, he was in a good mood which is rare for Ope these days so I figured I’d let him ride it out before church later.” 

Jo nodded, “Your club, not mine.” 

_________

It seemed like the club had okayed Kyle’s presence at the fundraiser, which at this point Jo knew there wasn’t any benefit of holding the grudge, it was out of her hands. Her and Gemma patched things up between them, or at least their version of that which was simply never mentioning it again and carrying on with their daily life business as usual. They were scooping chili, collecting money, shredding cheese, and chopping up fresh cilantro and onions for chili toppings. The booth was a success as it was every other year. 

Donna and Opie had arrived at the event, but hadn’t made their way in too deep before the two of them saw Kyle and had a discussion. Donna didn’t know the facts about Kyle or the whys and hows of Opie’s lockup, but all she knew in that moment was that Kyle had gotten out of the club and she wanted that for Opie. 

One downside to Opie was, he shared nothing with Donna. And then got frustrated with her when she knew nothing. Donna suggested that he get out like Kyle did, and that pressed a button for Opie, rightfully so due to Kyle and Opie’s history, but the way he snapped on Donna wasn’t in the least bit deserved. In his frustrated rage, he still managed to apologize to Donna before going to watch some of the games and activities happening with her and the kids. His mood progressively got worse as he saw Kyle having a great time with his kids, something Opie missed due to his prison stint. 

After attempting to get either of his kids to participate with him and ultimately failing, he let his family run off and explore as he sat on the picnic bench, alone and defeated. His eyes scanned over the crowd, he saw Jo playing with her daughter, blowing bubbles and laughing. A smile grew on his face. Opie made his way over to her, giving them a bit of a startle. 

“Hey,” his deep voice made the both of them jump. He laughed trying to ease their fright, “sorry, didn’t mean to scare you both.” 

“It’s okay, we were deep in a game of popping bubbles, once you get a 50 count, you kind of forget about the world around you.” Jo stood up wiping her hands of the bubble suds on her jeans. “Say hi to Uncle Ope, Dill.” Jo pointed to the man who was towering over both of them. 

Dillon overed a simple wave and went back to blowing the bubbles on her own which caused both of the adults to chuckle. 

“Dillon, go over to Grandma, her and Aunt Lu are going to watch you for a bit.” Jo pointed to the chili table that was 30 feet from them. Without fuss, the little girl was making her way over to the tent. 

Once she was in Gemma’s arms, Jo moved her gaze to Opie who was back to staring at Kyle. 

“How are you with that?” Jo stared at the piece of shit with Opie. 

“You know, seeing how everyone is with their kids, it's hard. Especially that asshole.”  

“5 years is a long time Ope, you can’t compare yourself to other people, other parents. I’m all Dillon has. Micky, well, we all know Micky is a deadbeat. And Kyle? He comes around every couple of months with money and toys, of course his kids love him, they’re not old enough to realize the piece of shit isn’t around because he chooses to be.” Jo comforted him as they stared at Kyle during the egg toss. “You’re not either of them. You were away, but you’re back. Be back. Don’t get sucked up in the past of it all.” 

“You’re a good mom, Jo.” Opie glanced over at her.

“So is Donna. You can’t box her out, Ope.” The words hurt to say, but it was the truth. 

Opie was silent for a bit so Jo spoke up again. “The club? I mean c’mon. Look at it from her point of view. The club put you away. I’m sure she doesn’t know how or why. To her, Jax, Clay, Bobby, the whole fuckin’ club, hell even me, Gemma, the fuckin’ crow eaters, we did this to you. Did this to her. To your family.” 

“It’s not that easy.” Opie tried to argue. “To just open up.”

“You’re doing a fantastic job doin’ it now.” 

“It’s different with us. I’ve known you my whole life–” Opie tried to defend himself. 

“But you vowed your life to that woman.” She pointed over where Donna was. “I’m not saying you can’t talk to me. We’re friends, we’ve always been friends and always will be friends. I’m just offering up some friendly advice.” 

“You think we’ll always be that?” Opie questioned. “Friends?”

Before Jo could answer, Jax was joining them. 

“Sup?” Jax greeted them, now the three were staring at the egg toss. “What I miss?” 

“Just hangin’ out like old times.” Jo laughed. “Wild isn’t it? We all grew up together, and now our kids, they’re gonna grow up together.” 

“How is your kid?” Opie said looking over Jo’s head at Jax. 

“Still in the toaster, but he’s healing quick.” Jax smiled. 

Before the 3 could finish their conversation, their attention was averted to the egg toss, where Kyle was currently soaked in yolk. Although the conversation was halted, there was a moment where it felt like time froze for all of them and the tattoo on the back of Kyle was framed and blown up for all of them to see. Jo felt the two men to her left and right tense up as they caught a look at eachother. 

“You guys go, I’ll distract Gemma.” Jo planned out knowing her mother would lose her shit if she found out things were going to go down at her event. 

__________

Whatever went down between Kyle and the boys stayed out of the gossip mill of the town which meant it stayed clear of Gemma. It was already dark out, which meant the club guys fulfilled their community service duties for Gemma and were either home or at the clubhouse, leaving the rest of the fundraiser full of families and volunteers. 

“Wow, dark already.” Gemma’s voice made Jo turn around to face her. 

“Yea, the day went by fast.” Jo said as she picked up her little girl who was previously holding Gemma’s hand.

“Enjoy the days, sweetheart. Before you know it, the years fly by and you start wondering where the time went.” Gemma was playing with Dillon’s hair as she stood next to Jo. 

The fireworks started to go off, which caused Dillon to shift in her mother’s arms and look up at the sky as she held one arm around Jo’s neck and the other around a stuffed animal she must have won during the day. 

“I think the years grew wings a long time ago, Mom.” Jo said as she looked to where the fireworks were coming from and saw Opie with his family. There it was again. That bittersweet feeling, she pushed him to fix things with Donna and the kids, but her heart tore a little bit every time she had to see them. “A long, long, time ago.”

[phoenixkaptain]

There’s one part in Red Dragon that I can’t stop thinking about.

Right at the start of chapter 8, right after the chapter where Will speaks to Lecter.

“Dr. Hannibal Lecter lay on his cot with the cell lights down after Graham left him. Several hours passed.

For a while he had textures; the weave of the pillowcase against his hands clasped behind his head, the smooth membrane that lined his cheek.

Then he had odors and let his mind play over them. Some were real, some were not. They had put Clorox in the drains; semen. They were serving chili down the hall; sweat-stiffened khaki. Graham would not give him his home telephone number; the bitter green smell of cut cocklebur and teaweed.”

It’s like this:

First and foremost, it’s been several hours since Will left. Will wasn’t there very long in the first place, maybe two hours if we push it, and for one of those hours he left Lecter alone.

Second, the first thing Lecter says to Will is this: “That’s the same atrocious aftershave you wore in court.”

Third, “Some were real, some were not.” The first part of the sentences following are real, the second parts are not. That’s the implication. Lecter is described only a chapter before as neat. He sorted the real and fake into two columns. What does that leave us with?

What’s real: Clorox in the drains, chili down the hall, Will Graham would not give him his home telephone number. We know these are the real scents because Will didn’t give him his home telephone number, a true statement, and it matches the columns.

(I’ve long wondered what Will not giving his home telephone number smells like.)

What’s not real: semen, sweat-stiffened khaki, cut cocklebur and teaweed.

What’s my point? Why do I bring attention to these details?

I believe the scents Lecter imagines are in reference to Will.

“Sweat-stiffened khaki.” We don’t know what Will is wearing (it would have been incredibly strange for Harris to describe what Will’s wearing, he almost never describes what anyone wears unless it’s important), but we can assume Will was sweating. From chapter 7, “He had to go to the rest room twice. He was numb.” Will is nervous throughout the encounter. Will is also, I have to tell you, the type of man to wear khaki.

“Cut cocklebur and teaweed.” I believe this is the scent of Will’s aftershave. Why do I think that? Lecter describes it as “the bitter green smell,” implying distaste. Further implying this, after he thinks of this particular scent, he sits up. He doesn’t like it. It bothers him enough to comment on it.

Also, I just can’t imagine why else he would smell cocklebur and teaweed, it’s really out of place if it doesn’t have to do with Will’s aftershave. I suppose it could just be a scent that he doesn’t like, but he pairs it directly with his main source of irritation, ie: Will would not give him his home telephone number. This implies a direct connection between the two, because both irritate him. The bitter smell and Will’s refusal.

Now, my main focus. “Semen.” When I originally read this passage, my assumption was that Lecter is making an educated guess as to why they would put Clorox in the drains. I’m not sure that’s the case. Lecter is the type of man who could smell semen underneath the Clorox, but the smell of semen is firmly in the “not real” category.

I’m just going to cut to the chase. I think Lecter is thinking about the scent of Will’s semen.

Why do I think this? Well, a few reasons. I don’t know if I believe Will actually smelled like semen upon visiting Lecter in prison. That would be a little bit… out of place? He hasn’t had sex in a while and he hasn’t masturbated. We know this. Don’t ask why, but we know this. It wouldn’t really make sense for Will to smell like semen. I mean, I could worm out an explanation for a possibility of how he could smell like semen, draft one of this text, but I won’t.

The semen smell doesn’t actually have to have been present. Just as Will’s aftershave and sweat are no longer present while Lecter is imagining them, the semen could be fabricated entirely.

I suppose my point is this. Why does Lecter imagine the smell of Will’s semen? Does it bother him? Perhaps all of these scents, real and fake, are bothersome to him, Clorox and chili included. It could irritate him. And he’s upset at Will in the first place, so it could very well be another straw on the camel’s proverbial back.

I don’t know if Will’s sweat bothers Lecter. Making Will nervous makes Lecter experience joy. He knows Will doesn’t like him, and he still sent Will a Christmas card. He likes luring people into a false sense of security and then ripping the rug out from under them. I don’t know if the scent of Will’s nerves would bother Lecter.

Okay, does he like the smell of semen then? Also debatable. I mean, he could, I suppose. Lecter is a man who eats human flesh. He’s not exactly the prime example of a person with “normal” taste. He could very well enjoy the scent, I would have no way of knowing either way.

Maybe it’s neutral. This three example case could be like this: neutral, like, dislike. Neutral to Clorox and semen. He likes sweat and chili. He dislikes Will not giving him his home telephone number and Will’s aftershave. That could be it. We know he enjoys food, even at this point, so he could very well enjoy the scent of chili. Somehow, I doubt prison chili smells as good as maybe other types, but I digress.

Why am I bringing any of this up? Good question.

I suppose, I’m just curious. Was the intention for Lecter’s obsession to be sexual? Or maybe not sexual, but romantic wouldn’t be quite the right word either. This book came out in 1981. A lot of early media depicting gay people did so exclusively by hinting at their sexuality with stereotyping. I’ve never seen someone (aside from Bryan Fuller I guess) who talked about this possible aspect of Lecter.

Lecter is described as small, lithe. He’s vain and prideful. You could say our first real introduction to Lecter is through Chilton, who states outright that Lecter knows a lot about Will. His first comment is on Will’s smell. He speaks with his head always tilted. (That one’s not stereotypically gay, I just think it’s kind of funny because whenever I write for him, I tilt my head without thinking about it) His final letter to Will ends with: “I think of you often.” He is, and I cannot stress this enough, highly invested in Will’s looks.

I just feel like, when you take into context that this was a period of time when being gay was highly frowned upon, queerness is mentioned several times throughout the book, Lecter calls him “my dear Will,” and while a cannibalistic serial killer being obsessed with you is a scary thought, wouldn’t, in the 80s, a gay cannibalistic serial killer being obsessed with you be scarier?

I know that Lecter’s characterization does change later on, in Silence of the Lambs and so forth. I’m not talking about those. Red Dragon was his first appearance. Mind you, he still rambles. But still.

I just wonder is all. A lot of people focus so much on his appearance in Silence of the Lambs, especially the movie version, but I ponder the early days, you know?

[brawlsbigbadonkers]

I’ve been stressing for the last couple hours so here’s my combaticon nonsense. Here’s some food I think the comabticons would be good at cooking/enjoy. Realistically no way some of them can cook, but in my mind they can cook a bit. And also…this is just me projecting because I like food.

Onslaught: Mans can cook a wicked burger. I just know his ass likes to fire up a grill. I just KNOW he can make good BBQ alright. Porkchops, chicken, anything that can be grilled, onslaught can cook it. I feel like he can cook a solid meatloaf as well. He can definitely make Fijian curry roti. Over all he’s a solid cook.

Blast off: Blast off can cook. Will he cook for everyone? Thats a maybe. He would enjoy making pastas. Like Fettuccine Chicken Alfredo or lasagna. He also likes trying new curry recipes. When ever he tries new recipes he usually makes brawl and vortex try it to see if it’s bad or good. He’s also a solid baker when he’s really in the mood. He has perfected making macarons. He learned how to make tavioka, a secret favorite dessert of onslaughts. He also refuses to ever cook lobster and crawfish after being pinched once. HE LIKES MAKING THOSE FANCY CHEESE BOARD I KNOW IT !! With wine of course , he’s sophisticated.

Brawl: He enjoys grilling and cooking meet. (Anger issues be damned, my boy can work a grill!) He’s definitely the person who eats while cooking (just like me fr) . He can make really good chili, all the combaticons are surprised when they tried it because they’ve witness brawl almost burn down the kitchen but they all agree it’s damn good. Hear me out ! He’s a EXCELLENT poi pounder.It’s messy and takes time but I feel like he’d enjoy hitting kalo with a poi pounder. (It’s good for anger/stress relief and you get poi after. Win win.) also he eats kalua and dips it in poi.

Vortex: Dosent cook often (never he’s banned from the kitchen) he’ll eat whatever everyone else cooks. He seems like someone who will eat something off others plates. He’s a big fan of onslaughts burgers, blast offs cinnamon rolls, brawls chili, and swindles ajiaco. He’s banned from the kitchen but he knows how to fry fish. He guts em, scales em, all of it. And he’s really good at it. He’s been practicing making chicken adobo. He’s also definitely made brawl try balut one time

Swindle: Surprisingly swindle knows a lot of different food recipes! Him and blast off share a small collection of cook books. He’s good as making meals for himself. He’s a fan of instant food like ramen and other soups. He Dosent make complex meals but rather follows instructions or quick meals. But he’s also likes to cook Ajiaco for the other combaticons, they all enjoy it. As a treat. But most times swindle will mostly likely order take out food from restaurants he likes. Has he ripped off door dash before? Yes. (He definitely lets brawl eat what ever he doesn’t finish or he’ll store it away for later in a container labeled “Swindles ! Don’t eat ! Specially you brawl and vortex!”)