#lord knows where we end up
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tlbodine · 10 days ago
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An odyssey is what happens every time @comicreliefmorlock and I go on a car ride together.
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meditations on the odyssey
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flowersforthemachines · 29 days ago
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Some facts about Taash (and also the Lords of Fortune, the Qunari, Dragons and other related things) gathered from the banters
Featuring Shathaan's stories about the Crows!
I went through all companion banters on DanaDuchy's channel after playing the game to write down all facts about companions/the world that I haven't seen brought up anywhere in the game as a writing reference (and for funsies).
Note: This list may not be exhaustive. I might have missed some something or didn't write it down because I considered it common knowledge. If you have anything to add, please DM me or send an ask! (do specify what banter the information is coming from, though)
Note 2: Posts from this series (mostly) don't include information from banters specific to quests or between companions and faction members. I plan to do another playthrough to capture more of those and will add any relevant info to the character posts.
Other characters' posts: Bellara, Davrin, Harding, Lucanis, Emmrich, Neve. I'm also planning a post about just the Lighthouse some time later
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About Taash
General: 
Taash gets grumpy if they stay inside for too long
Taash may polish their treasure hoard or clean the dishes (even somebody else's) to get out of their head
When Taash is feeling sad, they ask somebody else about how they are doing, so they can focus on somebody else instead of themselves
Taash doesn’t like talking about their feelings because it makes them sad (Lucanis can relate)
Taash doesn't read books before bed because they have a tendency to stay up past their bedtime to finish the exciting parts
Taash seems to care quite a lot about fibre and digestive health (they are so real for that). For example, they enjoy the smell of coffee but don’t drink it because it’s bad for their guts
Taash drinks alcohol 
Taash once requested Bellara/Lucanis to cook them a demon (the suggestion was disregarded) 
Taash liked Lucanis’s deep-fried peppers 
Taash liked Bellara’s stir-fry 
(If Rook is in romance with Taash) A spirit of devotion appears next to Taash after they enter a relationship
Taash doesn’t want to look for more dragonfire tablets because “they are just more orders”, and they already have enough  
Taash doesn’t kill in cold blood and needs to get angry in order to kill someone
Taash has good taste in gemstones, knowing which colours match which (based on the banters where they recommend gemstones for Emmrich’s lich helmet). They say it’s a Lord of Fortune thing, they have to know how to make gems look good 
Taash isn’t afraid of the Fade, because the spirits there mind their own business and don’t try to possess anyone (or anything) 
Taash thinks that even if the Nevarrans almost brought their dragons to extinction, they will still come back eventually
Taash is extremely excited to hear that Morrigan can (potentially) turn into a dragon and wants to ask her about it next time they meet 
Taash doesn’t mind finding no loot when hunting dragons because as long as you survived an encounter with a dragon, you have a new story to tell 
Taash doesn't think of dragons as monsters since they are a natural part of the world and have been around longer than anyone else
On fire-breathing: 
Taash started breathing fire when they were a toddler
Taash needs to eat greens after breathing fire, or they get headaches 
According to healers, fire breathing hurts Taash’s lungs
Taash accidentally set their first female partner’s hair on fire during their first sex
Taash once tried to cook with their dragon breath and accidentally melted a pot and set the kitchen on fire 
On Taash’s sense of smell:  
Taash got their heightened sense of smell after they got sick and couldn't breathe through the nose for a couple of months. After they recovered they could suddenly smell everything
Tassh can smell when someone is ovulating. They can also smell who had been in the room before them, and who is hungover 
Taash could also tell Neve got together with Rook or Lucanis from the smell even before anybody told them
To Taash, Minrathous smells rainy and ‘like rich people hurting poor people’
Early life and the relationship with Shathann: 
Taash learnt to swim before they learnt to walk
Shathann sometimes wouldn't let Taash play/go swimming until they finished their studies (like being able to tell the difference between some pottery shards)
Shathann gifted Taash axes during one of the gift-giving holidays when they were younger. They were simple kindling choppers, but Shathann helped decorate them to make them look like Qunari weapons. During a conversation with Bellara, Taash realises that may be the reason they are still using axes to this day
Axes are also good at lodging between dragon scales and allows them to climb up
Taash grew up poor, though they didn’t realise it because Shathann always made sure they had enough food, even at her expense (like pretending she didn’t want to eat because “Rivaini food is too rich for her”)
Taash spent the money they made from their first job as Lord of Fortune on buying Shathaan a dress. Shathann didn’t appreciate it, instead urging Taash to buy themselves boots or some other useful things 
Shathann hated apples because their skin would get stuck in her teeth (“Evataash, that fruit is stupid!”)
If Taash chooses to pursue Rivaini culture and wear Shathann’s horn as jewellery, they have a blacksmith do runes in the old Qunari language along the edges and get a Seer to bless it
Shathann stopped telling stories about the Crows after Taash once climbed on the roof to play as a Crow
The things Shathann taught Taash about the Crows:
Antivan Crows make themselves invisible to dragons by imitating the dragon's shadow
Antivan Crows coat the beaks of actual crows with poison so that the crows can kill people by pecking
Antivan Crows can slow down their breathing until they become invisible
Antivan Crows come through houses at night and kill children who aren’t in bed
Antivan Crows can do a special move that stops their enemy's heart
Antivan Crows can strangle a Qunari with their own dar-saam (but only if it’s tied incorrectly)
Relationships with companions: 
Bellara gives Taash advice on cooking dinner for their mother
Davrin teaches Taash to use buckets filled with water and sand for lifting
Taash has never flown a kite before and asks Harding to teach them
Harding's mother sends Taash a letter with homemade candies after Shathann’s death, calling it “a hug from afar” (Taash appreciated the gesture and liked the candy) 
(If Rook is in romance with Taash) Taash asks Lucanis about what Rook likes to eat, and Lucanis offers to teach them how to make coffee/tea/chiocolata calda 
Taash isn’t scared of Spite, and even convinces (or more like intimidates) him not to talk about how other people smell without their permission
Lucanis agrees to teach Taash how to kill targets with flair (with varying degrees of success when it comes to cool one-liners) and then plans to ask Teia to make a Crow cape just for them (Taash is very excited about it, as they love crow capes)
Taash insists Neve should get some trophy from Aelia (a ring, or an amulet with her name) to show everyone she beat her, and doesn’t understand why Neve isn’t interested in something like that 
Taash offers their blood to Neve for blood magic purposes (Neve doesn’t take up the offer)
Taash thinks Neve’s ‘dresses’ are pretty
Taash thinks nobody can go toe-to-toe in magic with Neve
Taash offers to hook Neve up with their jeweller to get her a discount (in case she wants a new leg) because “Neve deserves nice things”
Lords of Fortune:
Lords of Fortune have a drunk game where they throw a goblet made from fool’s gold into the water for others to find. Whoever finds it gets free drinks for the rest of the night. The game has only one rule: no punching in the junk
There is also another drunk game where drunk Lords jump off a giant cliff. The only rule is not to hit the water face-first
Even if those are “drunk games”, you can participate in them sober, as long as you are willing to be as stupid as the drunk people
The Lords of Fortune pick new jobs by Isabela throwing daggers at a map or racing nugs (the winner picks the job - could be its owner, or the nug itself)
The lords used to blindfold Mateo (the faction merchant) and spin him around in circles until he tripped on something like a map. They stopped doing that because a Seer told them to quit (the whole thing gave Mateo headaches) 
After Shathann is gone, Taash is in charge of appraising Qunari artifacts for the Lords until they find a better expert
The Lords of Fortune work with a Dalish clan keeper Shivanas (Taash calls them ‘Shiv’) who appraises artefacts for them (tells them what’s okay to sell and not to sell etc.) 
After losing his hand, a Lord named Bernst got a lock-pick hand prosthetic decorated with gems
About Dragons:
Different breeds of dragons can mate and produce offspring. That’s how ice- and lightning-breathing dragons came about
The muscles of dragon wings’ are vulnerable behind. Another weakness is the underbelly
Fighting Dragons is all about making them come to you, either by having them see you as a threat (so they come down to assert dominance) or prey (so they come down to eat you) 
There is a dragon called Wildervale Spitter, which can breathe fire or poison gas. The “fire breath” is actually just poison that burns when the dragon breathes. Most dragons always ignite their breath. The Spitter's special for being able to choose whether to light it up.
Dragons have an extra eyelid that they shut while breathing fire in order to protect their eyes
About Qunari etc.:
Eb-ketarra means something like “growing memories.” When you graft someone’s horn onto yours, you also add their strength to yourself
Qunari food uses a lot of oil for frying
Qunari have a much better sense of smell than humans
Qunari can bury their dead with large jars inlaid with a flame pattern. It’s called ‘issalatar’ and is empty inside, representing that the deceased’s body is also empty now that their spirit is gone
The Rivaini armada can hold its own against the Antaam fleet, but only in good weather. They can’t match the Antaam in firepower, but they can outsail them
Isabela is apparently still a captain of the Siren’s Call 
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minakoaiinos · 9 months ago
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Cutting this whole bit and most of the servant's lines and Bard explaining how to play cricket get the fuck ouuuutttt
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sysig · 2 years ago
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Hey. Read Roundabout. Love Awesome. (Patreon)
#Doodles#Wander Over Yonder#Commander Peepers#Emperor Awesome#Lord Hater#As always check the tags first but hgggg Roundabout is so gooooood <3 <3#Absolutely the fic that convinced me that Awesome was worth thinking about more than he initially appears lol#The™ fanon interpretation to me <3#Like the Eyesome stuff obviously (also the thing that convinced me to try out Eyesome and ended up loving it :D)#But also the Death Glare stuff! It's terribly cute the way Peepers and Hater go bouncing off each other haha ♪#Plus there's just a lot of fun phrasing like the one I put in the caption of Peepers curled up haha#Everyone's characterized so fun!#Plus there's just something very fun recalling my first reread lol - I don't actually remember my first reading experience#But I do remember getting fic-hungry for it later down the line at a local Mexican restaurant and reading it on their wifi lol#It's so fun to finally be at a point where I can confidently draw them and then to come back to the story and ahhh <3 <3 Very enjoyable#The first two aren't tied to anything specific other than the basic concept of those two drinking together lol#Same size glasses but very different alcohol-to-body-size proportions lol ♪ Buying drinks for Peepers saves hand over fist!#We all know he could put it away like no one's business so really it wouldn't matter in the end lol#It was so fun to doodle him curled up ahh <3 His silhouette <3 <3 Toss a blanket over him!#And the Drama! The deliciousness of Peepers keeping Secrets from his Lord Hater! Ah!#It feels so in-character of him to have alone time away from the ship that Hater doesn't even notice until he's been away awhile ♪♫#They're both adults ♪ They have aspects of their lives that aren't Entirely intertwined ♫ Until they do hehehe#Love 'em ♥#Hater was fun to draw there too lol slowly getting used to him! I like his PJs haha
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deus-ex-mona · 2 months ago
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moge chizuchan!!!!!!!
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liuisi · 5 months ago
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the thing i cant get over with calvinism is that like. yes God is sovereign yes God knew the ones who will be His since before the beginning of time, but that doesn't necessarily imply predestination. God knowing does not equal Him Specifically Choosing These People To Be Saved. the aspect i get the most hung up on is if you are saying that God has chosen specific people to be saved, then the opposite is also true. you can't say that God chose these specific people to go to heaven without necessarily implying that inversely, God ALSO chose (maybe indirectly, but still) specific people to not be saved. to go to hell. and for me that absolutely does not mesh with the loving God of the Scriptures.
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northwestofinsanity · 10 months ago
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Over the last few months, my dad has discovered Crowded House (as a band he’d previously overlooked), and he is taking me along with him in that. It still feels a long ways away at the moment, but this past weekend, I’ve finally gotten the sure feeling that it’s not a matter of ‘if’, but *when* that’s gonna be at least a small hyperfixation… And before January, I knew almost *nothing* about them, save for two of their own songs and a Split Enz song, so there’s literally everything ahead to get into.
In other words …help.
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iniziare · 8 months ago
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Tag drop: Guizhong (don't mind me re-dropping this with the fixed ones, shh)
#tag drop#[ guizhong. ] many things only seem to surface beneath the moon's poignant glow. wherever its light shines; the heart is wont to follow.#[ guizhong: ic. ] wherever her spirit may be among the countless grains of sand and specks of dust between the harbor and the mountains.#[ guizhong: inquiries. ] hmph. she always had a way with words.#[ guizhong: countenance. ] and because they are afraid; they try so hard to become more intelligent. this i understand.#[ guizhong: introspection. ] although she did not live to see the splendid sights of today: she was as much a hero as any other.#[ guizhong: etc. ] it took an elaborate treasure hunt to preserve the commandments that were once the lifeblood of a whole civilization.#[ guizhong: mortals. ] at their full potential; they could be her equal. a human who has as much to teach an adeptus as to learn from them.#[ guizhong: guili plains. ] as guizhong once said: “it takes every blade of grass and every flower to make a homeland.”#[ guizhong: liyue. ] perhaps she will look at the liyue of today and steal a smile when she sees the prosperous land that it has become.#[ guizhong: realm of clouds. ] a voyage to a sanguine sky.#[ guizhong: mechanical arts. ] in one's heart; i knew that she was indeed the superior talent in the mechanical arts.#[ guizhong: glaze lilies. ] they were far more abundant back then. entire fields would appear to the eye as a veritable sea of flowers.#[ guizhong: adepti. ] until the moon set and the sun rose. and only then would the banquet finally come to an end.#[ guizhong: morax. ] whoever it was that revered her so much was very clever indeed.#[ guizhong: morax. ] when our eyes meet; eternity is defined. [ delusionaid. ]#[ guizhong: xiao. ] if darkness comes; colors you with fear; be still and know that i'm with you and i will say your name. [ apocryphis. ]#[ guizhong: marchosius. ] who would dare snub the stove god and his wondrous creations? at the sight of him: we would drop any argument.#[ guizhong: streetward rambler. ] it almost felt like she was back again. sitting right there on the stone stool next to me; chatting away.#[ guizhong: cloud retainer. ] we each had our ideals; and neither one of us would yield to the other.#[ guizhong: osial. ] she would disrupt the silence around them with a hum; as if to sing to the harmony of the water. was this his song?#[ guizhong: sea gazer. ] he was quite the braggart when it came to those collectibles he was so fond of; he always loved to show them off.#[ guizhong: skybracer. ] to who lived by the mountain; he was their savior. in fact; they thought higher of him than the lord of geo.#[ guizhong: ganyu. ] if we planted flowers in the guili plains; do you think that one day we'd be able to recreate the sea of glaze lilies?#[ guizhong: v. descension. ] she descended whose dominion was over dust; and whose reach shrouded the skies for thousands of miles around.#[ guizhong: v. guili assembly. ] it's great to have it back but i want to go back to the world. and start with guili plains.#[ guizhong: v. archon war. ] they fought upon the plains; where black dust choked the heavens and a thousand rocks splintered.#[ guizhong: v. present. ] all wrapped up in a city that has existed for many moons to date. all these things: they are why people chase it.#[ guizhong: meta. ] her manuscripts lie unfinished in her abode. the blank pages give cause for contemplation on what might have been.
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better-call-mau1 · 2 years ago
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Sidious: “When my new apprentice Darth Vader arrives, he will...take care of you.” 😈😤😏
Nute Gunray and the Separatists, who apparently thought that being ‘taken care of’ by a Sith Lord meant something other than being sliced up: “Wow that sounds like fun! We’ll roll out the welcome wagon!” 😄🥳🤩
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#Revenge of the Sith is probably my favorite movie of all time#and I watch it religiously#but that bit has started to crack me up#Sidious says it so menacingly too#and Nute is like “oh sure sounds fun! can’t wait to meet him! does he have any allergies because Poggle was gonna make some mini-muffins?”#PACK YOUR BAGS AND GTFO#WHY WOULD YOU NEED TO BE TAKEN CARE OF BY A SITH LORD#THE SITH ARE TYING UP LOOSE ENDS#YOU AND YOUR BROSKIS ARE ALL LOOSE ENDS#JUST A BUNCHA LOOSE ENDS HANGING OUT TOGETHER IN THE SAME ROOM#and I know they aren’t sympathetic characters#but Palps played them and Dooku and Grievous like fiddles#“Clone intelligence has reported that General Greivous is… yeah yeah yeah you just got off a holocall with him ya Loth-snake#(wtf even is “clone intelligence”…are they spies??? they’re the most dubious guys in the galaxy! they all look alike!)#sometimes I think about those deleted scenes where Padmé meets with Separatist leaders#and basically kickstarts the Rebel Alliance#makes me think about if Nute and some of those guys had lived and joined the Alliance…lots of comedic potential#Nute: “I feel like ‘Alliance to Restore the Republic’ isn’t a very inclusive name for our cause. I don’t want to restore the Republic.”#Padmé: “Well we’re gonna have better luck piecing the Republic back together than Count Dooku aren’t we?”#Grievous: *uncontrollable cough-sobbing*#revenge of the sith#darth sidious#anakin skywalker#star wars incorrect quotes#nute gunray
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hirazuki · 2 years ago
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Choose Your Own Adventure: Middle Earth Edition
Tolkien's universe is vast and varied, and has so much potential for adventuring outside of the main story events. Let's go on one together!
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infizero · 1 year ago
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rewatched the scene where L calls light his first real friend ohhhh im gonna be sick
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hjemve · 2 years ago
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hello <3 spoilers but also fun fact....! the vagrant, instead of being completely consumed by the demonic essence eating away at his soul and body, will in fact survive it, mostly gain control over it (though he is considerably Less Human in appearance due to amount in which his flesh has been consumed by that time) and will actually live into modern times <3 he ends up meeting Artemis at some point. there's also another AU where Artemis' rival/enemy, Lord Schwarz (The Worst[tm]. also a very powerful big baddie vampire lord) lowkey hires and sends the wandering exorcist to kill artemis, knowing just how powerful he is and what kind of reputation he has. <3
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the-bluestreak-cat · 4 months ago
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My extremely personal red flag is if you’ve never lived independently.
Do not open tags it’s just a personal vent and I hit the tag limit (30) and that’s never happened to me before ajskdlf
#like not even having to live alone I think living with roommates gets a similar enough experience#and this is a vague blog but not for someone on this site (of course)#plus it is entirely founded on deep jealousy but like#but like man. I don’t wanna live with you if you’ve never had to maintain your own life before! bc it’s not a magic thing that happens#I’ve been ‘on my own’ for years at this point and I still struggle to keep my shit intact. maybe ur just That Good but tbh#I don’t wanna live with That attitude either!#idk man. like. it’s food. it’s dishes. keeping the floors clean. the bathroom clean. making sure you don’t run out of groceries or toiletry#it’s having a schedule of events around you. it’s being able to get places around you. it’s doing shit on ur own without friends#and again. I’m being unduly harsh. lord knows they’re better with their finances than me and that I had a spoiled ass childhood#the kind that spills into adulthood the way I refused to change my own car battery#I get that most of these things are there bc there’s limited space and they wanna care for their family and have a nest egg before moving#and it’s impossible to be mad at them for that bc it makes too much sense to do it. I’d do it if I got along better with my parents#idk. I feel like a shithead for not prioritizing them over other things in my life and it makes me defensive#bc I have to keep my life on track myself and at times it feels like they don’t#and I got frustrated bc I was late to a meetup bc I had to cook dinner and their mom brings them dinner every other day#and again. I get it. god knows I get it. but I also feel frustrated#I’d been considering a trip where we could see a national landmark but we’d have to drive two hours one way. and they’re anxious driving#and like. one time their friends car was shitting itself but that friend still ended up driving. come on dude#it is spoiled kid syndrome and my personal hamartia and I could be infinitely more understanding but#I cannot fathom not going somewhere bc I’m scared. if I want it that bad I figure it out. and sometimes it’s miserable but it’s done#and I cannot see a world where I live with someone too nervous to do things themself#urgh. I think they got into a bad wreck once when they were driving. idk. they mentioned it once in passing but I remembered them mentioning#I feel like a boomer haha.#what’s the plan for the rest of ur life? it has to be finding someone who will take on these for you#maybe not. maybe they’ll actually grow and find ways to be a person by themself but uh. depending on a person changing is bad business#I’m probably just a tightass. I couldn’t handle a roommate on account of being a huge control freak anyway lol#it’s unrelated but I’m sure I feel bad bc their other close friend (car shitting friend) is really good about this kind of stuff#driving them around covered food payments plus gifts vacations etc#hard not to feel like if I were more magnanimous this wouldn’t be a problem. but I’m not#and I shouldn’t feel bad about it but I do? bc friend b is a total star and I’m like. normal lol
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waywardsalt · 5 months ago
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#not one of them scary vent tag posts just. thibkin#ive been playing fe awakening mostly to collect different s-supports bc i like to get the different supports#and also just see. child character hair variants. i have to admit i think i like fates more but awakening has the vastly more#interesting child characters and like. everything with them it does have that.#i want to continue smt iv bc im on my third time through aiming for a nothing ending but like#i rrally like that game but lord its kinda a slog tbh. i might play some mlre later to ease back into it#i reeeeally want to get that neutral ending and figure out how to thread the needle fo reach it#years-old intricately detailed smt iv gamefaqs threads i LOVE you i would still be lost in naraku without you#motivation is… more isabeau screen time. or else#i have no interest in smt iv apocalypse i do not care about that i just want to see all of smt iv#anyways. new ship fic chapter draft poll and if it ends up a tie im just going to force something#or i could get my friend to jump in and vote if theres an even number of votes a few mins before it closes#a newer fear i have abt that fic now is that theres going to be more time spent before the romance#so only a little bit is the actual romance. and im going to remedy that. already have been working on it by shuffling around some events#look the plan is 31 chapters so far honestly we can do confession at roughly 40#and then just. keep going#i dont know how to feel abt it being potentially genuinely long. as. fuck.#i think it’d be funny if it ends up 70-80 w/e chapters n when i post the firsr chapter on ao3 with the bellum/linebeck tag n everything#and i do the chapter count so its like. say the plan is 75 chapters so i do the thing where it shows up as 1/75 chapters#i think it’ be funny to drop the first fic for this weird ass ship and just be open that its going to be like. a very long novel#i might not tho in case i decide to change things on the fly. anyways. whatever. i need to.#research gila monsters and also look into dnd paladins
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secretidentie · 6 months ago
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Tim for literally no reason: Hey Jason do yk where I can get some cocaine
Jason: Why tf do you need cocaine
Tim: I'm a teenage CEO why tf do you think I need cocaine
Jason: Fair enough. But I'm still not selling you cocaine
Tim: Why not? I just want to hang out with the other young finance bros
Jason: Hey dick head, tell your brother I'm not giving him cocaine
Dick: Tim are you okay? do you want to talk about this??
Tim: Uhg I'm fine. You're the one ones who said I should stop drinking coffee
Jason: and you thought this was a good alternative???
Tim: Come on I'll only do a little
Dick: Is this coz we spoiled the ending of wolf of Wallstreet
Tim: Why can't I just have some? You do!
Jason: No I don't
Tim: You're a crime lord
Dick: Yeah isn't it like part of the job
Jason: WHAT NO Stereotype much. I've never even seen cocaine up close
Tim: YOU'RE A CRIME LORD
Jason: Yeah not a drug dealer THERE'S A DIFFERENCE
Tim: I should have known your not cool enough to have drug dealer connections
Jason: OKAY YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA BUY A FUCK TON OF COCAINE AND DO IT RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU JUST TO RUB IT IN
Dick: Woah woah that's enough both of you. No one in this house is doing drugs. If anyone talks about cocaine again I'll tell Bruce you said you want to start a new crack epidemic. He'll make you sit in at strangers AA meetings and read through old case files of ex dealers and their autopsies. Don't. TEST. me.
Tim: ............
Jason: ............
Tim: Can you sell me meth?
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fanaticalthings · 8 months ago
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While I do find it funny that henchmen in Gotham probably warn each other about the Red Hood because he's a bat who will actually kill you. I think it would be better if Jason was actually seen as some sort of savior or idol to like 90% of the goons scattered around Gotham. Doesn't matter who they work for, they all know Jason, former crime-lord that took over majority of Gotham's underground in one night.
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Jason, years after the events of UTRH, now fighting crime alongside the batfam, except every goon he runs into immediately recognizes him, stops fighting, and starts begging.
the first time it happens, Jason assumes they're begging for their lives only to hear them begging for him to return to the crime lord business so they can work for him and not Gotham's current money-stingy, abusive rogues (Black Mask lol)
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Jason showing up to patrol as backup for Dick in an overrun warehouse full of Two-Face's henchmen and as Jason's about to interfere, one of the men stops dead in their tracks and stares really hard at Jason until:
Goon: Oh my God, boss, is that you?
Jason, pulling out his guns, about to shoot:
Goon: Mr. Hood, sir???
Jason, halfway about to pull the trigger: Wait a min–Jeremy? Oh wow, it's been ages! How's the wife?
Goon (Jeremy): Oh my God it IS you, holy shit where have you BEEN? Me and the guys miss you, man!
Dick, with a knife at his throat: What is happening right now
Jason: Ahh, well, crime-lording just wasn't fitting in on the daily schedule. Tryna turn over a new leaf and all that
Goon (Jeremy): Aw, that's disappointing. We really liked working for you, right guys?
[Chorus of enthusiastic "YEAHS" from the rest of the henchmen (even the one holding Dick at knifepoint)]
Goon (Jeremy): Well, anyways, I can't beat you up knowing you're my old boss! You gave us the best health benefits! We'll just let you take the evidence and leave.
Jason: Aw, thanks guys :)
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And that's why 95% percent of Jason's missions in Gotham end in success. Not because he's willing to kill people or because rogues are terrified of him, but because 90% of the rogues' henchmen once worked for Jason and fuckin love him lol.
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