#like what’s my best next move
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fuck! :)
(venting in tags abt transphobia & depression, read with caution love u besties)
#my sister just joked to me about how lately she’s like ‘yessss i love the lgb…community!’ like the joke is dropping the t#and i had to fake laugh along#i want to die! :)#joking (mostly)#no like don’t worry about me but this is not gonna help my s.i. i’ll tell you that#get me tf out of here#i was up past 4 am last night trying to figure out how to keep going#like what’s my best next move#how do i transition#& how do i stay alive till then#i tried to put on trans tape but i guess it was so late it made me do a shit job#that just literally made my chest stick out more#so i took it off and went to bed again#and she’s joking to me about how much she hates trans people#i’m so sick of this shit man#vampy’s adventures
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HISPANIC HERITAGE MONTH + BAND OF BROTHERS:
JOSEPH "JOE" RAMIREZ
Born October 5th, 1921, in Nebraska
Died April 8th, 1988 (age 66), in Martinez, California
Joe Ramirez enlisted in September 1942 (age 20) in San Francisco, CA, and he trained with Easy Company at Toccoa. Holding the rank of Private, he served in Normandy, Holland, and Bastogne. He was hospitalized in January 1945, and discharged in July 1945. After the war, he was married for many years, and had children and grandchildren. When he passed away he was buried with his wife, who had passed away 11 years earlier. Further information about him is scarce, but the brief character profile in the Band of Brothers series bible describes him as Mexican-American, and his personality as "sensitive and nervous."
Appears in Episodes 1, 3-8, and 10; portrayed by actor Rene L. Moreno
Sources below
A million thanks to @bleedingcoffee42 for tracking down this info for me!
#joe ramirez#joseph ramirez#band of brothers#rene l. moreno#mine: gifs#hispanic heritage month#latino heritage month#sources vary on whether he was a Private or PFC#they seem to have taken A LOT of creative liberties on the show bc#the only 2 anecdotes about him in BoB seem pretty diff from his character on-screen#not to mention that he would've been in the hospital during events of episodes 8 and 10 (each of which he's in several scenes)#on the other hand i do really like his character in the show and think he's one of the best and most underrated background characters#and why yes i am completely normal about him 😅#but also i'm sure he would've been great too if they'd made him more accurate to what limited info exists about the IRL guy#I forgot to save a few of the documents that bleedingcoffee42 sent me unfortunately but these are most of them!#but from one of them (his draft card?) i discovered he lived like 1.5 miles from my grandparents!!#(tho of course they moved there in the 50s so who knows if he was still living at same address by then... but still!)#oops i originally had the episodes he's in listed wrong on this#so AFAIK he's only NOT in eps 2 and 9#in ep 1 he's twirling a knife at the beginning and eating spaghetti next to Guarnere and Malarkey and playing basketball in England#in ep 6 he's eating the bean soup near the line when Sink arrives#in 7 he's sitting next to popeye and then in the church at the end (maybe in Foy but i'm not positive)#in ep 3 i thiiiink he's in Carentan next to Buck? and he's at the party in England sitting next to Lipton and listening to Gordon#in 4 he's in too many scenes to list here#in 8 he's in too many to list#in 10 he's hunting for food with the group and standing next to Grant's shooter when Speirs comes in the room
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I went to see my aunt today and she told me how my uncle saw a picture of his childhood best friend on a crime show earlier and apparently "Ritchie" (the friend) killed people in California
But bc I'm used to southern folk exaggeration stories I didn't think much of it until she said "the show said Ritchie started worshiping Satan in California" and THAT caught my attention, so I asked her for the friend's real name so I could look him up and calm as a fucking cucumber she goes, "Richard Ramirez... Do you know him?"
#tbh that's such an Alabama old person reaction#hearing your husband's best friend in high school was the fucking night stalker#'have you heard of him?'#I just had to laugh. like girl wHAT?!?!!? 🤣#they attended the same high school in El Paso TX#but then Ritchie dropped out of school and moved to California#my uncle graduated and moved to Alabama#then apparently stopped comprehending information for the next 40+ years#bc he literally learned this information TODAY#Thanksgiving's gonna be fucking wild this year
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i think the thing to understand abt martha jones is that even after she leaves she is five seconds away from dropping everything and traveling with the doctor at any given time. bc that itch to blow everything up and damn her personal duty to hell in search of a higher call never leaves her. but martha is smart. and rational. and has spent a long fucking time needing to keep herself safe. (bc he comes when she calls but never before.) and so she has gotten very good at keeping herself on the right side of those five seconds. but i do think if ten was a different person (if he could acknowledge how much he needed her instead of just how much he liked her) (if he didn’t feel this righteous martyrdom when it comes to being left alone) (if he cared enough about her to beg. if he cared enough about himself.) i think that her answer no would come crumbling down pretty quickly is all.
#MARTHA JONES’ TWISTED SENSE OF DUTY YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS TO ME#there is soo much nuance to this. obviously. and it really varies depending on when exactly in his run we’re talking#but me personally. i don’t think that martha was ever satisfied with the way things ended between them. i think she made peace with it!#but i don’t think she was satisfied and i don’t think she ever could be#which is also why i have slowly come around to her and mickey. even tho i think it IS very pair the spares in a way i don’t like#i do think they make sense together. in a genuine way and also in a you’re the closest i’ll get to what i want. you’re good on your own but#- you’re also the next best thing. and we don’t need to say this out loud bc we both know and it wouldn’t ruin anything by admitting it but#- it sure as hell wouldn’t feel good either#it’s not even like. directly about the doctor/rose here is the thing. it’s about the life he let them lead with him#which i guess is the crux of this. i think martha is capable of moving on from her Feelings for the doctor. but never her feelings about him#yknow. does that make sense. if anyone knows that the doctor is a symbol it’s martha#i don’t think she’s always in love with him. i think she was. tho my opinions on that r complicated hashtag tenmartha qpr BUT#but the IDEA of him? the idea which shaped her into a completely different person? i don’t think she will ever not want that back @ her core#she’s just too loyal to everyone besides herself to admit that. 😐#ok it’s 4 am i have been rambling abt this for fifteen minutes so sorry if it doesn’t make sense but i have FEELINGS ABT HER !!#ted talks#martha jones#doctor who
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what piercings does Danny have in your CFAU?
Danny’s got double lobe piercings on both ears, and then helixes, and an orbital on one side! Then he’s got an eyebrow piercing on the right side of his face. I don’t have any particular reason for why he’s got piercings as an adult, I just thought it’d be a fun way to indicate a physical change from when he was 14 and last saw the Waynes, to the next time they see him. Although with this version of Danny (rather than my original, unserious beta version of CFAU), it probably would follow that he'd potentially get piercings when he was older. (So not a total shock)
#dpxdc#dp x dc#cfau#childhood friends au#cfau danny#piercings#danny did his lobe piercings at home but the upper parts were done by a professional in the ghost zone#his ghostly healing means he couldnt go to a human piercer it’d heal in an instant#i’ve considered giving him snakebites. or a tongue piercing#guys with piercings >>>#playing dress up with your characters is the best part of making an au!#its also lowkey a relic to what my original childhood friends au was like in my head when it was still more of a 'daydream au'#which was more cracky and unserious. it leaned more into danny being more like his pre-canon self ie: meekish and shy when he was in gotham#so him having piercings/being more confident/cursing/etc the next time they saw him would come off as more of a drastic change considering#the last time they saw him (when jason was alive) he was a skittish and quiet kid. bookish. him turning out all goth-rock and punkish and#willing to throw hands with anyone he sees. would have been a big “huh??” moment for jason and co#hey wouldn't it be fun if jason had a childhood friend who moved away when he was a kid and returned to kill#the joker after he died? and that friend looked almost unrecognizable from his memories?#'daydream aus' are what i call aus that aren't all that serious and stem from listening to music and daydreaming. they're largely silly#unserious. and more “hah wouldnt this scene/idea be fun” and would've been harder to write down as a longform au. cfau stemmed from me#listening to music and going and then it spiraled from there.
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me after attempting to get back into sims and realizing i had a lot more to do than play the game
#hi everyone#I’m going around hugging you all#okay now that we are gathered here today#i will simply acknowledge that i have been gone for a very long time and then also acknowledge that maybe it was for the best#i relied on sims to be my only creative activity even if i tried to write a book at the same time#and also. i prioritized sims over real life responsibilities. that’s just a deadly combination lol#but I recently noticed I just replaced sims with Netflix. with YouTube. with anything that gave me quick dopamine#literally became addicted in a sense. still am but I’ve been cut cold turkey from most everything#I get off work and go. okay I’ve done the dishes and the laundry……..I could read or write or bake….#I try to write and sometimes i get a good hour#then I read for a few hours and then get tired of it#and I made cookies Tuesday so I’m waiting for those to be gone before baking again#I’m just so pitiful that I feel BORED and don’t know what to do#so I said….. okay what if I do sims for an hour.#I downloaded some new cc Tuesday and tried to play yesterday#y’all ……………….. I can’t find the energy anymore to set up elaborate scenes and pose my sims and plan posts#I said wow… this is boring without my intervention and fake story#I said wow…….. all this for what? for tumblr? yes I created cool things and provided joy. but is that inherintly important compared to my#own joy? my own everyday activities I should be doing?#y’all I do not leave the house unless we got out to eat or shop or travel to our parents#.. I have little desire to. I’m trying to find that desire#but my husband is busy with grad school and work and I don’t want to do anything by myself#I’ve found myself in one heck of a slump#I didn’t want to be human for awhile. just had no desires no interests no ambitions#I was slacking off SO HARD at work. I just had no drive to do well#I’m still working on it. I’m still trying to get caught up. I’m still trying to force myself to move every day.#but I am struggling y’all. and I can tell you that sims… sims isn’t helping rn but I want it to so bad. I want to get back into it#I didn’t mean to disappear on everyone. I got married and then life got busy and then I fell into this hole of nothing#I didn’t even WANT to crawl my way out. but my husband has helped a lot. I feel like such a child!!!!#I reached max tags. 🙃 bye love you all. till next time
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i dont think i will ever be over nandor tying guillermos cape with such care and focus. that moment its possibly my favourite from the finale NANDOR ACTS OF SERVICE GUY MAKES ME WANNA CLIMB A WALL and the way hes putting guillermo on equal ground now makes my heart grow 3 sizes
and to be honest i dont think they can go back to where they were before. for anyone whos worried. like yeah he told him “now clean up the body” after he reverted back to human but to me that was more like nandors brain going like. “i cooked now you clean”. he went through such a tremendous amount of work to help guillermo. he had the empathy to recognise the problem. he thought it through concocted a plan. he got the robes and the candles and he painted and hung those banners. he held a fakeass ceremony with all their friends and elders so it looked official. he then also comforted guillermo when he couldnt do it and staked derek himself without a second thought. so maybe its was more of a. i pulled you out of a very hairy situation. can you take care of the body now? (also it IS gonna be hard to let go of certain habits so maybe some comments like this are gonna slip out next season, but that is just because they are useless and in guillermos absence the house fucking imploded in one year lmao… maybe guillermo is gonna teach them how to take care of it themselves next season so they can split the workload and cute shenanigans will ensue)
i just dont think it was mean spirited on nandors part tbh. LAZLO even offered to help. i dont think that was just to have him in the next scene i dont think an unusual detail like that could be just for convenience. i do FULLY believe they are gonna all be on equal grounds next season. and thats gonna be so fucking delicious to me specifically
#to see a nandor and guillermo dynamic where nandor has freed himself from the inibitions of a master familiar dynamic? sign me up#he was so fucking warm and caring after he forgave him and idk if i can handle it GOD I LOVE IT#nandermo#what we do in the shadows#wwdits#wwdits spoilers#comment#im making a post out of some of my tags in one of my queued posts bc i#want to put this thought out in the world#i saw a lot of people going now that guillermos human everythings back to the status quo!!! and im like#no the fuck i hope not!! their relationship has consistently moved in a new direction each season#familiar. bodyguard. best man. best friend. now they went through allllll the trouble of showing them having an equals relationship#they made nandor utter the words he will be living in this house as an equal from now on#and next season everythings gonna revert back?? i surely hope not#there is also to be considered from nandors standpoint that now guillermo truly has no more reason to stay. he really isnt a#familiar anymore because he presumably doesnt want to be a vampire anymore (?) so he has to consider#if he wants guillermo to stick around. its gonna have to be out of the love he has for them. and nandor needs to give him an incentive#which would be equal grounds with the vampires even though he isnt one#and guillermo is probably gonna be in such an existential crisis mode that hes not even gonna notice all the cute things nandor is doing#for him now for a WHILE. until he does and thats gonna be delicious#anyway. why do i keep making excellent points in the tags this could have been a post
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i don't talk about him a lot on here but a couple years ago i got a beta fish which i so sweetly named sebass-tian hamil-fin. i'd never had a fish before but at the time, since i wasn't in my apartment a lot, a fish was really the only thing i could care for. unfortunately, he passed away today.
i didn't think i'd be this upset by it because i could kind of tell over the past week or two that he wasn't doing too well. i tried my best to make him feel better but unfortunately, it wasn't enough.
i plan to go and get another fish tomorrow but i just...don't really know how to feel about it right now. he was my first fish and certainly won't be my last.
#tw animal death#cw animal death#i do recognize that i gave him a better quality of life than being on some pet store shelf in a small container#but this still isn't easy to take. i know he wasn't doing well and i tried my best dammit. i really did.#the shittiest part is that it really is my fault. you're supposed to change the tank water every two weeks or so and i just...i couldn't#whether it be work or depression or executive function i just usually got to it around four weeks#and the water just wasn't healthy at that point. so i'm really kind of beating myself up for it because by the time i realized it#it was too late. but wow did that little guy fight. he survived a move with me! i didn't move him properly in any way shape or form#and yet he did it. anyway. i've expected this every day for the last week or two but it was just confirmed and it really hit me#i've just been sitting here crying because i loved him but also! idk i just needed some company at first ya know?#not to sound like. detached from the situation but like...it really was an experiment? bc i never owned a fish before and wanted to see#if i could actually do it and i'm so so glad i did#he was a beautiful fish and i appreciated his company because beta's are actually pretty smart and usually grow to recognize you.#i lovingly joked with one of my friends that seabass was in hospice the past few weeks so truthfully i know i did what i could#but it was also realistically a learning experiment. now i know how to properly take care of a fish and the next seabass will have a great#experience and tank already ready for him. anyway if you've read this far gold star! i'm gonna log off now#i’m rambling again aren’t i
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hate going for christian weddings sometimes because i always see the prettiest women with the ugliest men, the sermon is always some shit about wives being slaves (but not like bad slavery, mutual slavery except the husband is a benevolent master which makes it okay) and making babies for their husband, the music is always lame, the mc is always weird and obnoxious, and older women keep fucking asking me when it's gonna be my turn and never take no for an answer.
#mine#personal#brief storytime in the tags#one of my family friends got married and i was happy she was happy#her parents are like an aunt and uncle to me#i was happy to share that moment with them#we cried and laughed together#and my friends#their other daughters were on the line and looked gorgeous#it was just beautiful watching us all grow up in a way and move on to “the next” together#BUT#im a pastor's kid#and my dad loves weddings#he drinks them in whenever he can now especially because they make him happy and he's had to attend a lot more funerals this year#he's been burdened a lot by how many people he's had to bury and how many hospital visits he's had to do#so i was happy to see him happy too#it just all felt so bittersweet to me#because i know how badly my parents want this for me and for themselves#there was a daddy-daughters dance at some point and i could feel my dad beaming beside me watching that#and i was a little sad about it because i was like im never gonna give you that#this could be the best thing i could ever give you and i will never give you this#i can never kneel at an altar in front of a pastor and swallow that sermon#i would never marry a man in my generation#if i married a woman you and almost the entire tent filled with people that watched me grow up would not attend#my happiest day would be another funeral for you#it was worse because im kind of a small celebrity in this community because of my parents and their siblings who are politicians#so people i barely knew kept coming up and asking me when it would be my turn and how they so looked forward to the day#and i was like i love that we're a community here and i missed the pestering of aunts since i left church#but at the same time i was glad to remember why i left#there is no freedom to be myself at all with them because all they do is project their beliefs and ideas on me because that's what children
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OLD MEN WERE TEMPTING ME...........
#the concert has ended. christ alive#full review and thoughts incoming whenever i get around to it. nevermind ill do it now#OLD MEN WERE TEMPTING ME!!!!!!!!!!!#going into this i thought id be fine. normal even. WRONG AGAIN!#oh adrian. how could i have forgotten the immense fondness i had for you#i didn't forget but all the Adrian Feelings came back like thats really him 🫵#hes so charmingggggggg. jesus#and i thought it was bad with spars/russell doing cocomelon shit to me last year. and that may still take the cake but#tony levin playing that funky music god you love to see it in person. which i never have!#adriannnnnnn. his smile is so infectious he radiates joy like no one else its incredible. and so so endearing#steve vai............ it seems ive grown quite fond of you. actually it was more like i was suddenly like 👁️#hes uh. well hes sure something#OH i should also discuss the meet n greet well it was very short just kinda shaking hands and saying hi (awkwardly on my part)#nice hands steve vai. moving on#ADRIAN NOTICED MY SHIRT (it was a pic of him from one of his solo albums) and he was like 'i recognize that guy!' like dhfkgkfkg#i was also lovingly squished next to ade for the photo. hes sooooooo <3 sorry im sounding like gushy 2019 me but come on its adrian#tony levin is so sweet hes like the best uncle ever. i love himmmmmmmm#his funky fingers were funking!!!!!#oh oh have to say adrian sounds INSANELY good vocally holy shit it sounds the same as the 80s. hes such an underrated singer#im soooooo wowie wow. what a show guys. if i remember more ill elaborate later but thats all for now (waitin around by the stage door)
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-cracks knuckles-
I don't have twitter and I've never drawn a Miku before in my life, but I adore that trend happening rn and wanna drop down my two cents, so let's go with the research to make a Hatsune Miku: but she is from my family (hard to explain, but it's absolutely Texan)
#ghostie mumbles#looking up some native american jewelry from the ones in my genealogy to be accurate and true#as well as merging it with some casual wear and subtle cowboy stuff.#culture stuff for me and my family is very lowkey and more in what you'd see as little details scattered around the house--#--and houses of my relatives. so this is gonna be a very tame Miku but it's gonna be a nice little depiction of my heritage n stuff#I am going to have at least 1 piece of jewelry that represents the native american tribe sin my genealogy which is..#tbh.. as close as I am with that side of me. I'm so far removed that my physical features are so subtle you'd have to look closely to see i#everything I know came from my grandma on my dad's side and the powwows we have gone to when I was younger before they all--#--kinda.. stopped happening and moved to the big one called 'red earth' which is out of state for me#I liked the small ones.. the smells. the food. the music. getting to see the regalia of dancers.. the beautiful art and jewelry and trinket#--and figures you could buy.. it was always so nice getting to go.#at least the state fair has some stalls dedicated to native american artists who craft and sell similar things#one thing they don't have tho is the fry bread. and now I really want some. :(#ANYWAYS Gonna mark down the jewelry and the tribe name next to it as I find it and get that noted before moving on with everything else#I wanna make her look cute and interesting. will also definitely be looking into hairstyles and clothing. taking inspo from my own family#all this just for a dumb miku drawing#I do my best to try and do research for my pieces!!!! mostly.
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I haven't been involved with coaching for almost 3 months now and somehow I am still getting dragged into the drama.
#personal#move back to your small hometown they said#it'll be fun they said#me chanting over and over again:#if you live here you get to see your family all the time#(this is a good thing for me i love my brother and his family)#dude honestly this whole thing is just hilarious at this point#anyway newest drama is that one of the parents thinks it's suspicious that i 'quit' the same time my best friend moved away#the shit that is being said about us right now??? fucking wild#i haven't told any of those kids why i really left because they don't need me to be gossiping about their current coach to them#that would be so unprofessional of me#i say like she wasn't spreading rumors about me to THEM directly last year#we are all in our 30s here why are we acting like fucking teenagers still#i'm about to be real petty when i go visit next week though#'oh my god you won't believe what i heard crystal is telling people at her salon'#to the coach not the kids lol#i have a sneaking suspicion that the she is involved in this gossip in an adjacent way not directly#and i want her to think about the shit she says before she says it#she's mad that i don't want to coach jv when i told her multiple times i don't want to run my own program#and that i'd be happy to help her out as an assistant coach but that having to deal with parents is my worst actual nightmare#see what's happening right now#literally the only reason i applied is because i love those kids and they were all freaking out about my friend leaving#because they thought their current coach was also going to be leaving#and i was like hey i won't leave you guys don't worry#it's her fault that she chose not to include me in any of her brainstorming for next year#if she really wanted me to be involved she would have been talking to me about it back in april#i'm literally barely pulling myself out of my grief hole about losing coaching#and i could have stayed around but i would have been miserable#because it wouldn't have been in the capacity that i really wanted#oof okay i feel a little better after venting a bit
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bahh i want to chat about learning french but its kind of difficult. like either its super uninteresting to most people or i feel like i can come off as pretentious or whatever if im not careful and noo im just excited to both play videogames and learn a language. im literally a nerdd. anyway im going to make a post on that
#idk ive come to realise that im lowkey boring lmao#problem is i tend to have these massive interests that last for either 6 months or a year before i completely move onto the next shiny thin#like a couple years ago it was guitar#a while back it was stage lighting#now its french#smaller ones have been rats fish woodworking balloon animals musicals 3d modelling urban planning ect ect ect#and theres a part of me that always worries that im going to do the same with french#i was learning spanish but i had to give it up for french#the few constant interests in my life have been m1n3craft and drawing#but im never really hyperfixated on drawing in fact my best improvement occurs when im not focused on it lmao#idk point is i dont want to loose hope on french because i know how long it takes to learn and because the feeling of working towards it is#the best#but when your interests change so much and so dramatically it can feel like those that are most important to you are slipping away from you#idk this wasnt what i was expecting to talk about#though i do know that my siblings also go through interest phases like this dramatically so its probably not just a me thing
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So I was thinking about that modern AU, trying to figure out how to incorporate FCG because robot (literally he's just a pastors son. Duh)
but for some reason my brain said "Ashton's service dog" first. Then I thought about Ashton needing a service dog because of brain stuff. THEN I thought about Ashton needing a service animal AND a mobility aid.
So I'm just living for Ashton in a wheelchair rolling through school. They've got the key to the elevator. They've obviously got a whole dog at school that people try desperately not to pet.
When someone decides to bully FCG (Francis Charles Grady) or Laudna, they get out of their chair to their full height. People freak because they didn't know he could walk or stand. Ashton just shrugs because "you know what they say about assuming"
And when Dorian shows up and asks about it not as tactfully as he probably meant to Ashton pops a wheely and is just like "what's sadder than an orphan with a wheelchair and a service dog? Unfortunately it didn't get me adopted. People just don't want their inspiration porn in house anymore I guess."
And they try to be chill. They try to avoid those harsh topics with their friends because they don't wanna be a bummer. It'd bring down the mood to say "sure I can walk but sometimes my spine is on fire and my calves are full of knives so I don't." It'd suck to say "I can walk fine until I can't." It's not relatable to say "my whole body hurts all the time and if I want to be able to do other things like think, I should probably be sitting."
Slowly their friends get them to understand that they don't have to put on a brave face for them. They don't have to pretend like it doesn't hurt. They don't have to pretend like it doesn't bother them. Their friends care about them. Hell they're even down to help if they can. Anything to make Ashton feel like they are wanted, that they're not a burden.
#silver sending stones#ashton greymoore#yeah i know its fucking weird about fcg being a dog#i was like “thats fucked up thats a person” so i looked at their class and was like#oh shit thats a pastors son#thats butters#FCG hovers around them because in the third grade (when ashton still walked around school) ashton beat a kid up that made him c ry#so theyve been beat friends ever since#and people dont get it but they dont have to#ashton once ran over a dudes foot because he was making fun of laudnas shirt for having holes in it#and she was glued to him ever sinxe#the alliances forged in elementary school and middle school are ones that will live with us forever#fearne is the new kid who comes from like. Catholic school.#shes so clueless and so sheltered she asked what rhe chair was for first day#and ashton said “legs dont work” and she said “got it” and hasnt said anything since#imogen sits next to laudna in biology and they start to get close because no one else would partner up with them for labs#imogen and orym are both ffa kids and when imogen starts hanging with laudna and her friends she invite orym#who just lost his best friend after a tornado so hes like “fuck it maybe i should make some friends”#and theyre a cute little hodge podge group when Dorian moves from way out of town#i think him and fearne are both going to be theatre kids so fearne is like “omg. youre so nice you have to meet my friends”#then the whole group is here!! except for c pop#i thought maybe a teacher or oryms dad but i gate all of that#idk man we'll see
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wow gil albinism hc is a sore spot XD
Is it?? Idk if you mean my tone or other talk, I don't really see any talk on a glance through the search but it shouldn't be a sore spot imo, everyone should just do what they like and stand by what they like.
Just because I have a differing opinion doesn't mean anything like at all, I cannot stress how little the opinion I express matters to anyone BUT ME and my personal interpretation of a Gilbert that I vibe with. Truly, just do what you like to your little meow meow that makes you happy and rejoice.
#hetalia#Assby's Lore#<- I need to leave for the weekend nad focus on school but I will tag my headcanon takes this moving forward so anyone#who is bothered by it can just tag it!#I'll be scarce for like the next three or four days i need to buckle down#I don't know what my position is in fandom anymore bc i hiatus too much#but as an artist#I am conscious that eyes are on me#but I never speak as an authority and would never gatekeep#i love the hetalia fandom best when the characters are OURS#to mutually play with#diversity and freedom is what keeps us here
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Apparently I can meet my goal of roughly 400,000 words in 6 months if I just somehow write at least 2,200 words a day ghbjh... Almost 2,500 today... huzzah...
#Definitely not going to be able to stick with it just due to like... being realistic about my energy levels and etc. ESPECIALLY as we#enter the Evil Summer and it becomes hot all the time. But... one can attempt.. at least...#I'm also a very slow writer since I tend to re-read and edit while I write. and only move onto the next section once what I'm writing#seems okay. Which is easy for visual novel type stuff. since ''sections'' of a conversation are more clearly marked (like if you#have a menu option with 5 different dialogue choices. finish the character's response for choice 1 before moving onto 2. etc.)#Especially since when I'm done with a whole quest I always follow it up by playing through it and picking every option and making sure it#actually all works okay and etc. So I am already going to see it all a second time. Then I can go back and reorder a few words or remove#certain sentences that don't sound natural when I read them out loud (I always read it all outloud to myself since it is... just peple#talking.. it should sound like natural dialogue in their voice. etc). But my ''first draft'' is kind of not as first drafty since I pause t#edit a lot as I go along. So it also takes longer probably than it would take other people who I think treat a first draft as more#of a loose guideline or something. AANYWAY...#80F in my bedroom right now again... huzzah... I did end up finishing and recording that sims build video before the heat wave (or is#it really a heat wave if it's just summer..?? lol) came in.. but now... augh.. the editing... plus the costume photos and all else... Much#to do as always.. Often such a long todo list.. a giant scroll hung upon the walls of the evil hermit wizard tower..#Anyhow.. I hope I can finish getting ready for bed early in time to reward myself with a game of tripeaks solitaire whilst I snack on#cheddar cheese and some of those preserved artichokes in a jar. hrgm... I actually have nasturtiums (ultimate best flower) on the#deck again this year but I had to move them all into a corner today because the leaves were getting burnt by the sun lol.. Also am now more#cautiously weaving through social media to ignore all dragon age news. NOT bc of spoilers (I actually love spoilers/literally never play#any game until there's full guides on it I can read to plan my entire playthrough based on knowing exactly what I want to happen lol + mods#and etc.) but just because I'm so busy with my ownprojects I simply do not have the brainspace to dedicate... Yes I love to think#about elves and fictional universe lore. but no.. I pretend I do not see it. Does not exist to me actually. ghgj.. OHH also took som#cool pictures of flowers in the garden section of a store and I wanted to do like.. character designs based on the colors of the flowers o#something. but that might just be another unnecessary project to add to the pile.. I want to commit to the daunting task of dyeing my#hair again some time.. hrm.. this is all of the updates I can think of. As if a bunch of random tags make up for never posting anything for#weeks on end lol.. alas.. too warm to think properly I suppose.. .. I neeeeeed a long lost relative to leave me some million dollar#estate in their will so I can have the resources to move to a colder climate or something ..augh#.. but for now.. I shall toil away in my little wizard tower trying to write 2000 something words a day whilst sweating and such ghbj
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