#like what is the Thought Process what Feelings do ppl actually Have im so
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majorxmaggiexboy · 2 years ago
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*gleefully goes to play with my little Terror sailboats*  *slams into brick wall of What The Hell Is Attraction And How Tf Do People Experience It* 
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seraphim-soulmate · 1 month ago
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when my roommates put things back in the kitchen incorrectly it makes me frustrated and angry. apparently, did you know, this is not a thing all or most humans experience ? some people don't have an intense emotional reaction to things not being stacked in the optimal way, or pans not being put back in their "usual" spot. did you know this. did you.
#personal#I'm having an online interview on autism tomorrow and so I'm researching and reflecting more#not like this is ground breaking or anything but just. it's interesting to me that this typically doesn't elicit an emotion for people.#I've been crying a lot over autism videos#I haven't had a chance to process my diagnosis yet really and there's still so much for me to learn and accept about autism#like feeling shame and guilt bcs of disability has been a huge problem for me lately. not being able to accomplish what I want to.#and seeing videos of other autistic ppl who were really attached to the idea of who they would become when they got older#or identified a lot with who they were while masking#and now have to let go of those things. and figure out who they actually are and are capable of doing without burnout.#whoof man. its a lot. i still haven't let go of who i thought id be when i grew up. to the extent that said struggle is part of my identity.#it's just. I am autistic. several medical professionals familiar with autism saw me and went 'yeah you are autistic'.#I spent so long learning how to better cope with my depression.#and it turns out some of that advice is opposite to what you need if its autistic burnout instead#which im gonna assume i just kinda had both going on at various times#i just. im not sure what to do with my life.#but i guess first i have to make my life more baseline liveable and enjoyable before i start pondering that#change is hard. basically. thats what this was about.
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phagodyke · 4 months ago
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weekend melancholy is starting to kick in >~<
#im gonna go and do my food shop etc to keep myself busy and hopefully my 2nd meds will kick in and we'll be able to handle it together#i think i kind of do this so regularly bc my brain is just processing everything bc i dont rly have time during the week#all cool tho im doing good overall def on the up n i feel way more capable of coping emotionally which is nice. i <3 meds#also.. possibly settling on the idea that i might be agender. very tentatively. lots of experiences n thoughts coming together rn#ive been reacting in unexpected ways to a lot of gendered shit atm which has made me reconsider the way i think abt myself#but very difficult to articulate it to myself let alone anyone else. so ive been sitting with it for now until it precipitates#gender stuff has never rly affected me much or ive never been in a place to explore it which is why i havent thought abt it super hard#but im not the sort of person who needs a lot of internal exploration to figure out my identity like im v self aware tbh#and while im wildly indecisive abt most things in my life for some reason i never have been abt stuff like this. i learned abt lesbianism#like idk 9 years ago-ish and straight away was like yeah that makes sense for me. never looked back since#n similarly ive experienced forms of gender dysphoria before n just immediately dealt with it symptomatically n moved on#its never been smth to agonise abt for me like i know what makes me comfortable in my skin so theres no question abt doing it#and ik im privileged to be able to do that. and also it helps that gender for me is mostly divorced from external perceptions#+ that im v autistic so social pressures dont stick to me very well. i mean yeah i was bullied for it as a kid but i was stubborn asf#so yeah from the moment i realised i was genuinely uncomfortable/upset abt it earlier this week i was like okay. lets try this instead#its given me pretty instant relief from any distress i was feeling so far which is nice. rare respite from one of my torture labyrinths#just testing out internally whether it frames things more clearly n makes me feel more myself/at peace before i choose to stick w the idea#but not gonna do a whole coming out fanfare either way. dont think i wanna change how ppl interact w me + im still a dyke#so i dont consider it relevant to anyone else unless they share a similar understanding of gender to me. or if we're v close#ill prolly broach it w other trans friends eventually bc insert philosophers talking image. but to everyone else its business as usual#happy to play my cis-sona at work. + w new queer ppl i meet ive been introducing myself recently w mirrored pronouns instead of any/all#and i think i prefer that. virtually indistinguishable but theres smth nice abt inviting ppl to recognise me the way they do themselves#like translating + localising a non-gendered language into a gendered one... simplifying decisions abt how to perceive me#and ofc ppl are still gonna perceive me however but idc much unless we're actually friends. the rest is all a performance anyway#doubtful anyone on here ever has reason to refer to me but if u do for some reason... im freeloading off ur pronouns now btw <3#but yeahhh. much 2 think abt. i need to read more alien/ai sci fi.. non-human sentience has been such a comforting concept lately#but yea tldr i woke up one morning this week like damn im prolly agender but i have a full time job to go to rn so idc abt that#.diaries#okkkk my dex is kicking in im no longer on the verge of tears lets go get these groceries wooohoooo
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pepprs · 2 years ago
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also like to clarify.. we were not expecting her to leave. and any time she would have left would’ve been bad timing but it’s like.. this was HER program and we didn’t have enough time to really get to know it as well as she did (and still does probably). and there are so many flaws in it that we didn’t have time to address and our attention was spread so thin bc we were / still are juggling a million things and trying to compensate for the vacancy in our already extremely and egregiously small staff. so i get that the leaders may be feeling unsupported and resentful of that and that is very valid. but it’s like.. if that is in fact the case i think it’s important to know that this is not ideal for us either. we lost the person who knew this program inside and out and we still haven’t recovered and even though her position has been filled now (by my new colleague bestie who is AMAZING and has been helpful and supportive and has gone above and beyond in every way and i adore them don’t get me wrong) we may never fully recover from it or at least we won’t for a very long time. and im not even just talking about like the impact on our work. i mean on us as people who were closely psychically bound together. which sounds freakish and weird but we were. that wound is going to take a long time to fully scar and when the scar forms it will always be there. so excuse us for not putting on a perfect asb less than a year after she left us we are kind of seeing the consequences of all of the horrors right now lol.
#purrs#delete later#i need to not be so fucking bitter about it i know it’s not helpful at all. but it just feels so unfair. i feel attacked. i know we had a#lot of room to grow and we still do but it’s like.. we did the best we could and we��re doing the best we could now. and it just sucks. the#things we thought were going well were not. and the things i need to cope they have grudges about. so like what the fuck ever. it’s like at#this point i hate all of them and never want to see them again. LIKE THE WAY IVE BEEN FUCKING BENDING OVER BACKWARDS over text trying to#help one of them bc she texts me all the time and it turns out she thinks we’re evil??? lol. ok. whatever. like go fuck yourself lmao#<- i need to just get this out of my system bc it’s soooo immature and unhelpful and not how a staff member should respond to this and#posting abt it online is dangerous and has consequences. but i just feel so miserable. and small. and painfully aware of my smallness.#and alone and helpless. and unable to support the people who actually are being responsible and mature and coming to confess stuff to us#even though they’re snitching or whatever. like this shit is so unbelievably fucking stupid and i shouldn’t be letting it get me down but i#just feel very vulnerable to it all rn and lonely. but typing out my thoughts and knowing peopel will read them helps (cringe). ok i should#go to bed now bc we have a very long and early day tmrrw and i haven’t prepared for what im supposed to do AT ALL bc we were in that session#for like 5 hours when it was only supposed to be 1.5 and i didn’t get to eat and my ut*rus is trying to rip my body apart like a wolverine!#* unable to support the ppl who are actually being responsible.. LET ALONE my colleague besties who are each carrying the burdens of this in#different ways and are also processing this difficult news in ways that will have implications for our past present and future! like lollll
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tanadrin · 10 months ago
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Imagine one day a new social trend starts spreading. It’s something unbelievably dumb. Not harmful per de, but truly silly to believe. Let’s say, I dunno, healing crystals start going mainstream. Everybody’s talking about their crystals. It becomes impolite to criticize people who believe in healing crystals. They become a big part of people’s personalities, and people on TV start talking about them, and one day years down the line politicians are debating funding for crystal-based medicine. And through it all you are sitting there going, what the fuck is happening. I thought we were all on the same page on this. You want to get along and be friendly and open minded but you cannot pretend to believe in healing crystals, this is nonsense, and when the topic comes up you refuse to lie about it. This eventually starts to have social consequences—they’re that popular!—but what can you do? You cannot pretend a lump of quartz can cure the flu or whatever. It’s just all so unbearably embarrassing.
I think what the centrist/liberal/center-left reactionary turn driven by culture war stuff feels like. And I think the key emotion is probably cringe. Not hate, not fear, though those emotions may reinforce the turn. I think in a lot of cases people who imagine themselves pretty open minded and flexible have as part of their worldview something they thought was bedrock social consensus—on the level of “healing crystals are silly woo”—so bedrock maybe that it didn’t even need to be a conceptual boundary they actually policed in their minds.
For instance, when she started her anti-trans turn, JK Rowling made a big show of not being really anti trans, just arguing that Some People Had Gone Too Far. She wasn’t a frothing religious reactionary, after all. And I believe that’s probably true! I think Rowling probably did have a mental model of sex and gender with a little bit of give in it—of the “we can humor the odd weirdo” type. But as the discussion of trans rights in the UK got more serious over her lifetime, trans people went from “the odd weirdo” to “a recognized minority,” and eventually this ran against a bedrock belief that on some level men are men and women are women and never the twain shall meet. To act otherwise was just too embarrassing. And she wasn’t going to embarrass herself in the name of political correctness.
Other people whose brains have been eaten by the anti-woke mind virus (as @eightyonekilograms calls it) have something going of the contrarian in them, who enjoys yelling “up yours, woke moralists!” or w/e. Im thinking of ppl like Glenn Greenwald here, or Dave Chapelle, people who seem not to feel alive except when people are mad at them. That’s a separate but interesting dynamic. And there are people like Graham Linehan who become totally unhinged through this process of auto-radicalization, moths drawn ever closer to a particular source of validation within their chosen reactionary subcommunity, until they are truly parodies of themselves. That is also an important dynamic, but it’s one that only takes hold after the initial turn has begun.
I think the role of that feeling of cringe, that refusal to entertain an idea because it is too embarrassing (even if it does actually have a decent body of research behind it, unlike crystals) is important to think about, because I am interested in how to get people over it. I know that feeling has affected my own thinking over my lifetime. I wasn’t raised particularly conservative, but I had to learn not to cringe at a lot of feminist thought before I could appreciate it and learn from it. I explicitly didn’t have that cringe when it came to gay people for whatever reason, so it never entered my mind that it might be a problem. I remember being surprised to learn when I was very young that some boys wanted to marry other boys, but my response was “huh. Go figure.” Because for whatever reason I had not picked up that this was something I was supposed to be grossed out by. A general doctrine of empathy, of trying to understand people on their own terms, can help forestall some of this stuff, but it’s not foolproof in either direction—I don’t want to believe crystals have healing powers if it becomes socially popular to do so, just because it is socially popular to do so! And if they do, I don’t want to not believe they do just because it is socially unpopular!
(Obviously the crystals thing is not a one to one metaphor for the trans thing, so don’t read too much into that. Maybe astrology would have been a better analogy. Also I’m not talking just about people whose reactionary turn is predicated on trans issues—I think this dynamic applies to everything from gay rights to the Tridentine Mass. But trans issues are a handy example bc, as the adage goes, somebody posts once about trans people and they never post anything normal again. I think the classic rapid-onset trans derangement syndrome is closely tied to the fact that gender norms are a really deep element of many people’s social-consensus-based worldview, and so challenged to that worldview are felt as really cringe.)
I’m curious if other people who grew more liberal in their thinking over time had a similar experience of having to overcome what was basically a feeling of embarrassment at certain ideas.
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theyapper0 · 3 months ago
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Doodles for the finale and some things that I picture will be BIG points in S2 of this rewrite!!!
A lot of the post-finale stuff is written w the drawings BUT I do wanna say that the hotel isn't getting rebuilt in just one 4 minute song
It's gonna be something that's gonna be in the slow process of rebuilding over the course of season 2, serving not only of a physical representation of how the whole idea of the Hazbin Hotel is basically starting over from scratch due to what happened in the finale (tarnished reputation bc of Adam's death, redemption being possible, etc)
AND it will also be another force in the season why characters STILL won't take our gang seriously DESPITE THE FACT THAT CHARLIE AND VAGGIE'S THEORY WAS RIGHT, the hotel is nothing but scaffolding and garbage by the time season 2 takes place, who's gonna believe THAT PLACE is the holy grail for redemption?
And there's some ramblings about this rewrite and what im considering moving forward!!! Just about my thoughts for season 2!! Feel free to read, or not!
I'm still on the fence with how I wanna go about season 2. On one hand, Im really curious to see how the writers decided to have the next season play out in canon and I'd totally be willing to implement any ideas that I liked just like I did with what I have so far!!!!
But on the other hand..... I HAVE SO MANY IDEAS........ So many plotlines for the story and the characters that I WANNA DO!!!!!! I WANT LILITH TO BE THE ONE WHO ALASTOR MADE THE DEAL WITH, I WANT ALASTOR AND CHARLIE TO FIGHT, I WANT LUTE AND VAGGIE TO FAC EACH OTHER AGAIN I WANT EMILY AND CHARLIE TO BE ON AWFUL FOOTING I WANT SO MANY MANY MANY THINGS MAN!!!!!
I have a lot of ideas and theories that I wanna do in this that I KNOW will get disproven when the actual show gets its next season and Im scared of this turning into something else entirely.
I mean, Im not scared of it being something different, Im just worried that people wont wanna read it if it strays too far away from the source material. Ik a lot of people (myself ESPECIALLYYYY) get turned off when it comes to super convoluted aus that has so much story and shit and is so far away from canon, too much to follow -> ppl don't care (like i get it, I AM THE SAME WAY OK........)
But does this stuff make any sense??? idkkk
I have a couple posts worth of doodles that I'll be uploading w in these days so look forward to that!
And I definitely have some ideas that I'll be sharing about this rewrite's version of S2 so.... I guess if people like what I have planned for it, I'll keep going? IDK!!!!!!
Thanks for reading this jumbled mess!
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celaenaeiln · 1 year ago
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it’s a me a 12 am anon . my girlfriend and i had a discussion abt how odd it is that the fandom views and stereotypes the batfam like
dick is romanian and has more fem related traits and somehow it translates into him being a dumb womanizer or just an annoying mother hen?
jason grew up in the streets, i think its popular to hc him as hispanic? idk but jts odd how ppl do that and also think hes an angry heartless brute
cass gets that “badass asian dragon lady” archetype (tbh im not sure what it is but my gf is passionate abt it so like im confident she’s right)
tim?? somehow ive seen wasian hcs for him but the boy is autistic right? somehow a stereotype i see for him is like “weird and socially awkward but super smart” which . i dont think thats right .
steph is adhd right? i think? also falls into the dumb “waffles r my only personality trait” stereotype and uts just a tiny bit odd dyou see it?
damian (and by extension talia) gets done dirty a lot i think i dont .yeah
nyways sorry its been a while <3 would llve to hear ur thoughts n opinions
hey again!!
Batfam fanon is...not great. And it's things like this that remind me why I kinda avoided this fandom until I couldn't.
Dick
Dick is Romani and is canonically more feminized but the dumb womanizer thing is really getting on my nerves. First of all, he's one of the smartest characters, ever. The comforting thing about Dick is that he never loses.
The reason I love reading Dick Grayson runs is because I can read about his thought process, the way he analyzes, how he single-handedly solves crime like it's nothing.
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Batman (1940) Issue #703
Secondly he's not a womanizer. He literally has a mental break down at the thought of dating or even kissing someone he isn't in love with. He's never, ever, ever going to sleep with someone he doesn't have atleast some level of romantic attraction to because he feels it's inherently wrong and canonically frowns upon that behavior when others do it.
The mother hen thing - I gotta admit is kinda accurate. He really loves his family and friends and takes care of them really well. He always makes time to sit and listen to all of them with all their problems and helps them solve it so that's fine.
Jason
The hispanic thing - what the actual heck. Literally why? Jason's "hispanic" fanon background along with Tim's "asian" background comes from a wider problem where society has become disillusioned by the same ethnicity for all characters and wants for diversity and representation in the media. I actually do believe in greater representation but not here. When people make Jason hispanic due to his street backstory, they're attempting to diversify canonically white characters but accidentally reinforcing and perpetrating damaging stereotypes about particular ethnicities. Because his background has drugs, poverty, and crime - you want Jason to be Latino? Can you possibly make things worse? And Jason being an angry heartless brute. Not even adding to the stereotype, Jason was not like that. Jason originally started off as troubled but excited kid. He was happy about fighting criminals and having a home and getting food. As he grew older, the more criminals he fought, he came to a realization that people weren't going to change which is when he started getting more violent and angry with them. He didn't do it because he was some sort of psychopath, it's because he cared a lot about the effects these criminals were having on innocent people. Because he can relate. His anger has nothing to do with his supposed "hispanic" background which is still - ?!?!? Why is this even a thing.
Cass
I don't really have anything to say about Cass being that archetype because tbh I kinda think of her like that too. She's exceptionally good at fighting, she's chinese, and she's the strong and silent type. I'd love to hear more about what your gf thinks about it though.
Tim
Again about Tim being Asian. No where near as damaging as Jason being classified Hispanic but also why? He's asian because he's smart? Because he's good at computers? C'mon the stereotype is boring. Isn't it exciting when you watch a movie or show and the Indian guy isn't an IT specialist? Or when the Chinese girl has neon highlights and loves partying? Or when the Japanese girl is rocking combat boots? The best way to appreciate diversity is actually letting ethnic characters have diverse personalities and talents. On a side note, there is not nearly enough celebration of already canonically diverse characters like Roy's navajo heritage or Jessica Cruz's latina one. Isn't it ironic how we're making racialized characters based on stereotypes because we believe there should be more diversity but ignoring canonically ethnic ones. Literally noone talks about Cass connecting to her Chinese side or the fact that she has dyslexia but we're readily jumping on the Asian Tim Drake train.
Autistic Tim Drake I can see where they're coming from because Tim sometimes has a hard time connecting to people. Like he sometimes misses social cues. And to be fair this theory actually has more credibility than some other ones because I don't know if I'd pass that off as awkwardness. But it also may be due to lack of human interaction. Tim's parents left him alone for long periods of time which he gleefully used to track robin and batman at night. I don't have a problem with this one because Tim may actually be inadvertently written as autistic at times so I guess it wouldn't be that far off canon.
Steph
People with ADHD are typically impulsive, don't focus on one thing for too long, and have a lot of energy which is very much like Steph.
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Batgirl (2009) Issue #10
But mostly she just has a sense of humor. Which - like the case with Dick - because of course people can't be multifaceted, fandom generally takes for stupidity.
She's not dumb, she's just fun. I guess the waffle thing is because of human beings' pathological need to classify everything into categories and fanon likes to run with dumb blonde for Stephanie which really ticks me off. People can not be a gloomy avenger and still be smart. She solves her crimes and has a laugh while doing it and still pulling off the -
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Batgirl (2009) Issue #12
Damian
Where do I start. What is even happening to him? Not in fandom necessarily but canon. What is DC doing???
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str4wberrysw4n · 6 days ago
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𝓡𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑: 𝐮 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐨𝐥˙✧˖°🎀⋆。˚꩜
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if u've been in the manifestation/loa community for like less than a week, u probably already know abt the statement: "ur the creator of ur reality." the meaning of the phrase is exactly how it sounds: u control every single thing abt u and around u. all of ur manifestations/"desires" are possible bcuz u, the creator, have decided that they are possible. stuff like that. however, I feel like some people don't understand what that really means and how much power u actually hold.
when u are the creator, u don't have limitations. everything that happens is ur doing. ur relationships, ur appearance, ur lifestyle -- everything is being controlled by ur subconscious, whether u know it or not.
if u decide "oh, that boy rejected me, so that means he and i aren't meant to be", that thought manifests into the 3d and that boy and u aren't meant to be. that's because u as the creator have decided that this person will feel that way about u.
"if im the creator of my reality, then why can't I manifest my desires?" first of all, I've already said this before: u are constantly manifesting ur desires. in fact, u saying that u can't manifest is not only u putting limiting beliefs on urself, but ur also calling them desires, meaning that ur still trapped in the illusion of the physical world.
second, i think I've also mentioned this before-- we are limitless beings experiencing human life in the physical world. if u want to be wealthy, a bunch of money isn't gonna just drop from the sky. while the 4d is the true reality, ur subconscious will still manifest in a way that doesn't seem weird or straight up bizarre to the average human. that’s why we don't notice/recognize when we've manifested something; because it happens in such a natural way that u can't tell if it was a coincidence or ur actual manifestation (spoiler alert: it's the second option)
knowing this, think abt what it means to truly be a creator. u basically control everyone and everything around u. the creator doesn't fear abt their "desires" never coming to pass bcuz they know that if its not happening, it is not meant for their life in the physical realm. they will see something happen in the 3d that conflicts with what they imagine in the 4d. but instead of wavering, they let themselves process their emotions and then remind themselves that the 3d is an illusion, the old story, and that the 4d is the new one.
this is where anti-loa come in and say "oh so if someone's homeless, then they chose that for themselves?" "if someone's dying of cancer, then they chose that for themselves?" and this has actually been a point that I've agreed with for some time. what abt ppl who go through genuine pain and suffering in the world? are they at fault?? this bugged me for some time and i only just found an answer now. so do i agree?
"yes" and no.
(i have not experienced either of these things. I've seen people manifest illnesses away and money when they needed it, but i have not personally experienced it. so pls take my following words with a grain of salt ^_^)
let's start with the homeless thing as an example: if ur homeless, it is incredibly difficult to remind urself that in the 4d, ur incredibly rich and wealthy. such awful conditions and circumstances make it hard for someone to persist. this ends up in them unfortunately conforming to the 3d and leaving things up to chance instead of taking control.
same thing with illnesses; how can u tell urself that in the 4d, that ur cancer free, when ur possibly confined to a hospital bed? they can still control their realities, but not only is it incredibly difficult to do so, but some people either don't know or don't believe in manifestation, indirectly abdicating their title as creator. so it is "their fault"... but at the same time it isn't. (ppl r obviously entitled to their own beliefs as well)
to sum it up, u are the creator of ur reality and u control everything that happens to u or around u. we r all human beings experiencing life in the physical realm so ur subconscious manifests ur 4d in a way that makes logical sense to u. however, when ur experiencing smth bad, it's not ur fault if u waver or find it hard to persist!! (the 3d can pack a punch sometimes) as long as ur able to remind urself of the power that u hold, u'll be able to get through it!!
happy manifesting!!!! (≧▽≦)ིྀ
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midnight-black2 · 5 months ago
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twin im back i js got the new idea of like some ppl purposely trying to fw kai and get him into trouble w richard and he got frustrated and whiny about it so like his mean gf yelled at him cause at the same time it WAS his fault. but then he ends up apologizing n you can take the smut from there like idk if that part makes sense
𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄
pairing : kai (voyagers) x reader
synopsis : basically what the req says
disclaimers : dom!reader, sub!kai, whiny!kai, light degradation, lowk mean!reader, handjob (m!recieving), a little short, kinda fast-paced
note : bro i'm so sorry this took so long to come out 😭 also ignore the title, i couldn't think of anything better
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your first mistake was allowing kai in your room at all. firstly, it was against the rules (you could've surely gotten in trouble), and secondly, you knew he would just throw a non-stop fit.
your second mistake was continuing to argue with him, instead of kicking him out as soon as he opened his damned mouth. either way, you couldn't go back, and you were really, truly, sincerely pissed off at him. after all, it was entirely his fault as to why he was so mad in the first place. maybe if he ever just shut the hell up, this never would have happened to him.
unfortunately, you knew it was only a matter of time before he began to actually feel some sort of remorse for what he did. so, you weren't surprised when he knocked on your door and so much as practically begged for you to let him in. and?...you did.
"fucking hell kai, just go back to your room," you spat, as your arms folded across your chest.
"no," he began, as he closed to door behind me. "please, i'm sorry, i am. i just..." he trailed off.
"you just what, kai? don't waste my time," you said, with an exasperated sigh. he fidgeted a bit, as his gaze lowered to the ground.
"look, you were right. i did deserve it, and i was being a brat, and im sorry."
"glad you finally came to that realization," you started. "never thought i'd actually hear those words spill from your lips." there was a moment of silence, you had nothing else to say.
"i'll do anything to make it up to you. just, stop being mad."
"kai, you can't just tell me to not be mad. that's not how it works," you said, with furrowed brows as you plopped down into the chair beside your bed. you rubbed at your temples in an attempt to calm yourself.
"i said ill do anything, please." you sighed at that. you knew it would be difficult to resist him. at least you tried...
"get on the bed," you instructed. he was quick to listen, as he fumbled a bit in the process of getting over there. he rested his back against the headboard, awaiting any further instructions from you.
you took your time to get over there. you mentally cursed yourself for giving in so easily. you sat across his lap, straddling him.
"you really have to learn to take accountability," you mumbled, leaning in slightly. he mirrored your actions, leaning in as well.
"sorry," he mumbled against your lips, his breathing becoming a bit ragged. you pulled away. and he chased your lips. you chuckled softly at that.
"you didn't think it'd be that easy, did you?" you teased. he felt a whine bubble in his throat, but to spare his pride (for now, at least), he swallowed it back. your fingers trailed across and down his chest, and he felt himself shiver as you did so.
"please, [name]," he uttered.
"be patient, kai," you replied, calmly. you pinched his skin in certain areas, just to see his reactions. it was entertaining, really. after a bit more of teasing. your hand found its way to the waistband of his pants. you tugged slightly, prying them open, before letting go, watching as they snapped back against his waist. he sighed shakily at that, swallowing thickly. you eventually began to pull them down.
"lift your hips," you said, and he did just that. you pulled the pants all the way down, the cloth pooling at his feet. you notice his semi-hard on, and you have to resist the urge to laugh. it had only been a few hours of not being with you, and he was already so riled up?
"jesus kai, you're pathetic," you said, under your breath. he elicited a soft whine at that, to which you smirked. you palmed him gently over his boxers, and he let out a low groan.
"please," he begged, looking up into your eyes. you didn't say anything back, relishing in the noises he made with every touch you left. you finally began to pull down his boxers, and he met you halfway by lifting his hips. they were discarded with his pants. his semi was now a full hard on; red and throbbing pitifully hard. pre was leaking steadily, flowing down and onto his lower abdomen.
"what got you so hard, hm?" you asked, as your fingers danced across his tip. he whimpered softly.
"you." you smiled at that, before completely wrapping your hand around his cock. you spread the pre, using it as lube. your pace began slow, painfully slow. he let out low moans and groans, hips bucking into your hand ever so slightly.
"stay still," you said, keeping a hand on his waist to ground him. "is this really all it takes for you to shut your mouth?" he whined, throwing his head back.
"f-fuck [name]," kai cried, brows furrowing in pleasure.
"say you're sorry, kai," you ordered, and he nodded.
"m'sorry, so sorry. you were right," he babbled.
"good. you're lucky i'm even doing this for you. should've just left you to get off yourself." you twisted your hand, speeding up. you thumbed at his slit a bit, making him moan out.
"y-yeah. s-shit, oh my god thank you," he mumbled. it was so uncharacteristic of him, and it was thoroughly amusing. as your hand worked on his cock, you gripped his chin, and planted a harsh kiss on his lips. he whined in your mouth, before you pulled away.
"here's what you're going to do. you're going to apologize to everyone, including richard, understand?" you asked, locking eyes with him.
"y-yeah, okay," he breathed out, whining softly as your grip around his cock tightened slightly.
"oh, fuck. think m'gonna cum [name]," he warned, as he pulled his lower lip in between his teeth. you laughed cruelly.
"oh no, i didn't say you'd be coming, did i?"
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𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 © 𝐤𝐲𝐚-𝐢𝐬-𝐤𝐨𝐨𝐥
𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐲? 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞
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girlfriendsofthegalaxy · 4 months ago
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tuesday again 7/16/2024
how your backyard hurricane go, the houston area? pretty good it doesn't seem
to be clear other than losing everything in my fridge and developing some mold around the windowframes IM personally fine and so are the girls and so is the lair. we lost power sunday afternoon and got it back friday morning (upside down smiley emoji x16)
listening
THREE CANONICALLY BISEXUAL CLUB BANGERS!!! also, trying out a new thing with spotify and youtube videos for songs bc my readership is about 70/30 and i want to streamline the process of actually listening to new music for ppl. it must be really annoying this week but that's bc there's three songs. sorry. it will rarely be this long
anyway.
ANXIETY by Lilyisthatyou is new to me, off the spotify autogenerated dance playlist. a chiller groove in the spelling-things-out genre of dance music. VERY flashy-lights music vid fyi
Why do I feel so alone? Does it show That I'm dancing to fill the void with pretty girls and pretty boys?
youtube
i know about kesha's joyride bc i happen to be an alive queer woman. im SO happy kesha is also alive and making music more regularly. this one is canonically bisexual bc kesha is bisexual. also a really flashy-lights lyric video. the most classically recession-pop/early KESHA sound of all three tuesdaysongs this week. im always fascinated when an accordion shows up.
Rev my engine ’til you make it purr Keep it kinky, but I come first Beep-beep, bitch, I'm outside Get in, loser, for the joyride
youtube
thank u new releases spotify playlist. also canonically bisexual bc the singer is, also an early KESHA feel but she is a metal artist first and foremost. very fun to headbang to at a stop light. i don't totally Love how it's an emasculating song but given how dudes in the metal scene generally are? i think she should make it more emasculating actually
Take you down a peg (And peg and peg and peg) If you're a macho man then beg (And beg and beg and beg) Bend you over the bed (The bed the bed the bed) It's time to take you down a peg (And peg and peg and peg)
youtube
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reading
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fun fact i still haven't seen this movie. i got this from the library the day before the hurricane proper and it gave me a really lovely two hours of not thinking about the active hurricane the day after. enormous format photographs! full-length shots of every look! ithe little personal notes from each designer were so fun to read, and i think this genuinely healed my heart a little. everyone was so excited to go into detail about what choices they made and what inspired them, and even though i would have loved more specific construction details, specific fiber types, and full-length shots of the Back of every look, i recognize i am a freak.
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watching
watched a truly bonkers assortment of films at my bestie's house this week. her husband is big into godzilla and i sat down not really paying attention or planning to pay attention to Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire (2024, dir. Wingard) but found myself actually paying attention. i unfortunately was a character i hate, Person Who Stops The Movie Halfway Through To Demand A Recap. loved these guys, whatever the fuck they were
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the most fun thing about this movie is that it is not a silent film but it acts like one. there are long, long stretches of movie without dialogue bc all the political action is happening between a bunch of giant monkeys. this is going to sound like im damning it with faint praise but they really thought carefully about directorial and artistic choices here! there was a vision and they executed it! it's fun to look at and not just because there's a big monkey in most of the shots!
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playing
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got a look at characters for the new fire-themed land coming up this fall. ppl are understandably big mad that the land is based on Ring of Fire cultures and everyone is paper-white. i think it is correct to be mad and ask them to do better, and they have tweaked designs before release before, however, i don't think this will bring about a sea change in gacha games.
i am rolling along clearing out map markers and achievement hunting and my GOD are there a lot of time-gated achievements in inazuma (electricity-themed legally-not-japan). so so so many of them i originally got halfway through or did 1/5 and then wandered off bc i didn't realize there was a quest or achievement locked behind doing something for three or five days in a row. i now have a post-it on the corner of my monitor with nine different things i have to keep checking in on this week. please someone give me a REAL JOB!!!!!!
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making
cross stitch progress. this was the only thing i did last week aside from shake like a chihuahua and sleep. very slow going! may have to ship the package off to my brother with an IOU bc it is already stressfully late.
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made the bean influencer soup (creamy miso coconut butter beans). i made a batch before the hurricane last week so most of my notes are from then. the grocery did not have canned butter beans so i made the same thing (big lima beans) from dry. i have not made beans from dry since i was very small. these beans were so large, so pale, so aggressive.
changes: i was able to find a little carton of straight coconut cream at the grocery but they were out of miso paste. i did have miso soup mix and plopped that in. i also used frozen spinch bc it’s cheaper and i felt better about it than the somewhat questionable fresh spinch on offer. also used two onions instead of one and a hearty dollop of minced jarred garlic bc who do u think i even fucking am. i would have loved to use fresh dill, bc i did plant some and it was growing very well, but the caterpillars were very intense and ate almost everything on my balcony.
going in the rotation! im making it AGAIN as im typing up this post! pretty cheap, very tasty, i don't regularly keep butter beans or coconut cream in my pantry but that can change!
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bones-of-a-rabbit · 1 year ago
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u can never have too many au ideas (aka the cursed-sun/moon au)
(im copy n pasting this from discord bc im lazy sorry y'all fsjhf)
other au idea: Sun is a ruler or lord in a fantasy world or smthn and Moon is the form he's been Cursed into turning into each night. Reader is a low-tier magic-weilder (who has a secret past that involves smthn rlly Bad and they used to have a reasonable amount of respectability in th community but now theyre shunned and cant get a job anywhere and also has a big scar and/or only one eye lol) who's one remaining ability is the ability to lift minor curses or plagues. Sun has been searching for someone who can 'bless' the curse of Moon (or whatever is making Moon be nasty murderous bloodthirsty man) for ages but mages r rare and most of them spend maybe one night trying to cure Moon before either getting got or being scared into getting tf outta there
so eventually word reaches Sun of a mage who's been looking for work, with the only catch being that they arent very powerful and no one has much to say abt them, and Sun, who has burnt every single thread he has trying to find a mage, is like GOOD ENOUGH CALL THEM HERE
and reader is like 'oh shit this is potentially a rlly good job, the only catch is that i have to deal w a demon possessed guy thats like twice my height and three times as strong,,' and like. bc they have Zero Options and also feel like their life has run itself into th ground and there is little left for them/no way to get themselves out of their Issues, they r like 'yeah sure its gonna take a while bc i can only perform minor magic but i'll do whatever i can to see that this curse is delt with'
and instead of trying to face Moon head on, they start with just kinda,, getting to know him. he's kept chained/locked away in a chamber every night to keep ppl safe, but every night reader goes into the chambers, sits at a tea table just out of his reach, and just. talks with him
they dont entertain his trying to mess w them, taunting, cruelty, etc, but they talk when there's the chance for standard conversation. at first it's hell bc Moon is a little shit and he never cooperates. he never answers questions, he spends the entire night threatening to tear them apart and savor their insides, etc. they bring him a cup of tea every night, and every time he smashes the cup and throws the pieces at them
ok well point is eventually Moon starts to mellow out around them, will actually sit and have conversation with them, one day is like 'you think i dont know what youre doing?? youre just trying to bore me into falling for ur trap so u can kill me. i like ur style but its not gonna work >:3'
and reader is like 'i literally do not have enough magic to kill a toad let alone a whole entire possessed person' and moon is like ',, huh. so what IS ur goal here??' and reader is like 'i want to lift ur curse for both u and Sun's sakes. i gave u my word, and i will follow through, at the very least to clear my own conscience of a past sin'
and so eventually Moon, out of curiosity, and later bc he likes spending time with reader, starts letting them cast the healing magic on him, breaking the curse little by little every night
and at the same time all this is happening, reader is spending mornings and evenings with Sun and keeping him up to date on how the process is going and, eventually, becoming the person he turns to when he's stressed or tired or rlly just wants company
and idk smthn smthn eventually both of them rlly want Reader and they dont know how to act so they just b making fools of themselves but reader is a dumbass so theyre just confused
(Moon absolutely tells Reader abt every 'oh man i rlly wanna kiss kiss snuggle smooch the mage rn' thought Sun has during the day but Reader is so used to Moon being a little shit n making shit up to mess with them that they r just like ._. )
the plot twist part,,
(the secret dark past that reader is hiding is that they used to be a local mage for a nearby town who was known and respected for giving 'blessings' to ppl for small fees but one day for Reasons, they cast a curse upon someone and one of the biggest no-no's a mage can do is Curse someone so the town practically rioted, tore them down from their pedestal, called upon another mage to strip reader of their magic, and then cast them out)
(rn im considering the idea that the person reader Cursed is Vanny, who, because of her own curse, eventually went on to be the one who cursed Sun and Moon)
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phagodyke · 5 months ago
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woke up feeling ruffff but took my meds and went back to bed for a while n I feel a bit better
#only slept 4 hrs yesterday so was rly hoping to get a solid nights sleep today bc i probably won't tonight....#but i didnt sigh. but my options are either to plough thru w today and make myself do this even tho i dont rly feel like it#or cancel plans and stay in and mope which will inevitably turn into self harm so rly the latter is a non option lmao#its all okay ill get into the swing of things n have a good time once im thereee#and i always knew i was gonna feel a bit like this like its an open wound for me i just need to be careful not to touch it#bc how i feel isnt based in reality its just insecurity n vulnerability n ik it can take months to fully recover from a previous episode#and part of the recovery process needs to involve facing potentially triggering situations instead of avoiding them#bc otherwise ill get increasingly worse bc its not possible to always avoid and ill be defenceless again when it does happen again etc#like its part of rebuilding my sense of self n confidence n hopefully i can eventually start to trust other ppl again n lower my guard#bc it sucks being contorted into this defensive pose all the time and i would like to allow myself to feel genuine connection w others !!#and to stop instinctively flinching and waiting for the hit im tired of my mind telling me ppl r lying + trying to hurt me when theyre not#im being a bit dramatic like i am doing a LOT better than i was a few weeks ago. n i def can handle this one#and the risk of triggering myself is much much lower anyway in this specific situation. so long as theyre not hiding shit from me again#i can think of several ways that risk could skyrocket n unexpectedly spiral out of my control n it makes it hard to breathe just imagining#but i need to believe that it wont. so if-no WHEN it doesnt then next time ill have proof that i can navigate it n i wont feel so anxious#it makes me laugh how stupid this is from an outside perspective. my brain causes me so much weird n 100% unnecessary distress#but its the only brain ive got n will always have so i need to work with it!!#anyway all that aside i genuinely am rly looking forward to this afternoon!! ive rly wanted to start doing more nice things for myself#n the fact it coincides w missing smth that could incite my rsd is kind of for the best even if it is making me anxious#i cant let my life revolve around anticipating how ppl might upset me n basing my decisions off minimising that damage#n while it would be nice to have company.. well ik its just as fun going alone bc ive done it before! n i need a reminder of that#ah im gonna turn myself in circles if i think much more. i dont need to justify anything#i hope they have a nice time and i hope i have a nice time and i hope that eventually someday we can have a nice time together instead#of separately. and i hope that someday ill feel included and wanted by other ppl and wont be posting on tumblr every time this happens LOL#this comes across like im saying i need to learn how to enjoy my own company or whatever but i prommy i already do..#what i actually need to learn is how to trust n enjoy the company of ppl i care abt without constantly being scared theyll hurt me....#but thats not happening today cuz i got other plans woooo OKAYY im gonna stop ruminating and get some chores done sjdkfh#.vent#<- well not rly a vent bc its not like im channelling feelings here im just rambling bc i have a lot on my mind. but still#this is prolly incoherent i keep putting my phone down and doing other things and then adding another thought LOL
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coffeesleep-ooc · 3 months ago
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I wish we had more than that one extra that talked about LBH’s experience with SQQ growing up. Like I understand why more of the book doesn’t reference the more casual end of white lotus era…but…I would’ve loved to see it refrenced more…actually nvm I think I would’ve gotten creeped out if done the way I’ve seen some people write it
Omg, thanks for sharing your thoughts 👀👀👀
I thirst everyday for what could have been 😔🙏
Honestly though, one of the few things that disappointed me in sv was the lack of disciple days shenanigans! It would have made the story x3 longer and it’s true that the contrast of a happy white lotus LBH and the consequent betrayal and miscommunications would have taken a hit but!!!! -insert whining dog noises-
i need it!!!
actually i thought that even that kind of content could have been played of as nostalgic and even heartbreaking in the right way, especially if it’s LBH reminiscing, but I also doubt he would avoid those kinds of thoughts a little bit bc he doesn’t want to question SQQ and his love ig? Maybe he is scared that if LBH demands answers SQQ will suddenly decide he doesn’t love him anymore and leave…LBH couldn’t take that
idk, that is my theory but i agree it would have been nice to have more of that content? Maybe crammed in before the IAC? But again, that would have made the novel longer -sighs-
Idk why you would have been creeped out? So im wondering! I mean…i’ve read a lot of fics including smol bunhe, from the horny simping LBH ones, passing through the ambiguous pining-LBH nothing is wrong here-SY and even the platonic end where LBH does have feelings but SY is snagged by someone else (imnot crying you are crying) and i believe that all takes are interesting even if a couple ones are a bit questionable…fiction wise
i do think that LBH growing up would slowly go from ‘Shizun is my god and my role model’ to ‘Shizun is my most silly man who i want to wife up and squeeze as soon as possible but he is still so good and peerless and im a bit potato but if he thinks me pleasing to look at I’ll maybe have a chance if I’m super explicit with my intentions…maybe’. And i think that process has a lot of potential??? Bc like, he puts SQQ in a literal pedestal at first but I imagine that living with the man makes LBH realize that SQQ is a human being with likes and dislikes, with a thin face and silly behavior underneath, who shows LBH more kindness and humanity than anyone else, and this is interesting bc other ppl did it before and after him, but LBH is stuck on him??? Also, we see sv from SY!SQQ’s pov, but again, LBH has suffered and known some of the darkness of the world before meeting SY, i believe his method of protecting himself is either to act cute and be super nice, even manipulative about it, while SJ’s was to be a prickly man with the ‘i hurt them first so they can’t hurt me later’ method, and this is why they are conflictive, different protection methods and different levels of blackening. When LBH realizes there’s nothing for him to cling to in a place, he will go silent like a shadow and endure until he can do something about it, if there’s something about SJ and LBH is about their parallels being breathtaking in the ‘im trying not to cry’ way and both endure and endure beyond their breaking point until something happens. SY transmigrated just in time to show LBH that the place he lived in still had some salvation, that the person that hated him and punished him still was capable of humanity!!! We don’t know what LBH thinks of SQQ changing like that, if he believes SQQ lost his memories or smth, but what he concerns himself with is basking in the light he thought was lost, and this makes him a naive character…he hasn’t lost his experience, he knows still what is to be scorned, alone in the world, treated like a street rat, but hopes that his current situation stays like this forever (except he starts getting greedier for SQQ’s love and affection in other ways)
i digress, LBH starts falling for SQQ bc the man shows him humanity underneath the kindness, later on he will be Shizun’s favorite (the dream for him, truly) but first SQQ shows him that he can make mistakes (skinner incident) and that he can be incredibly stupidly selfless (without a cure poisoning) and finally that he is a silly man, with a kind soul and with a lot of dignity and self-assurance despite his obliviousness of lots of things
On that note…idk why i’ve seen a lot of ppl saying that LBH would have fallen for the first person that showed him kindness? Like yes usually kindness is the base for love and interest, but as i see it, LBH didn’t fall for SQQ right away but gradually, not even knowing it himself until it was a tender devotion he couldn’t even try to suppress. LBH didn’t fall for NYY in sv? And she was kind to him, not helpful at all, but kind and human and flawed, but SQQ was such a bright light, such an imposing and beautiful being to him that he couldn’t feel anything for anyone else! Novel-canon LBH is just too obsessed with Shizun, and even PIDW LBG wanted to take him back with him, i mean…
And even if he did fall for someone kind and human like SY, that’s how life works, and i think that if a character deviates from his original narrative and manages to stay in character then it means it’s well built!
LBH is a very good character in my opinion and BingQiu is a very interesting dynamic full with nuances and hysterics (hehe), i do love reading about white lotus bunhe and i could only imagine what SQQ felt like when he thought that the person LBH was before the conference was dead TAT
and this is getting long hahaha sorry, hope some of my rambling is pleasing and answers your comment at least a bit! Thanks for asking(commenting? Talking to me?) <3
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froglover7789 · 3 months ago
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Why don't the prequels work as Vader's backstory? It's literally about how anyone no matter how good or well intentioned has the propensity for evil if they let themselves make bad decisions.
Narratively I think it's beautiful and tragic that way.
i think the prequels r actually about how corruption and manipulation and desperation and fear can ruin a person---not just bad decisions :3c and the prequels r consistent with some of the messaging of the originals in that way but that doesnt necessarily mean they serve as a good backstory
heres a handful of reasons why i dont think anakins back story really works with vader:
the originals imply that anakin and uncle owen are blood brothers or at least grew up together. owen sees anakin in luke and this is something that would only really be possible if owen knew anakin well as a teenager. this is also the reason why owen doesnt tell luke about the jedi; he thinks that luke will, like his father, run off to become some sort of war hero and die in the process bc thats what he thinks happened to anakin (some ppl think that owen suspects anakin became vader but i think this is a stretch). the prequels establish that they dont know eachother and didnt grow up together. owen doesnt know anakin outside of what he mightve seen in war/ republic propaganda and thats not very indicative of character. this also raises questions about why obiwan gave luke to owen/ why they took him in in the first place. it makes more sense for anakin and owen to have been very close bc then obiwan wouldve heard of owen and would genuinely trust him to raise his best friends son and owen wouldve cared enough about luke to raise him as his own
what we're led to believe in the originals is that anakin was a powerful jedi who lost sight of what he was fighting for. we're led to believe that he was torn, that the war corrupted him, that war isnt the answer. this works bc the originals r meant to be symbolic of the vietnam war (where the empire would be america) and so this idea of the consequences of war and the importance of peace is a huge part of the originals message. while this is somewhat supported by the prequels its undermined by the fact that anakins fall is mostly bc of YEARS of grooming starting from when he was a kid. this wasnt a normal, good man who lost sight of what was right and crumpled under the weight of a war. this was a man who was the most special of them all and fell bc he had space hitler literally whispering in his ear since before he knew he was a person. thats not the same thing at all! and that steals the implication that vader could have been any soldier, any general and makes his story all messy
side note- leia has vague memories of her mother which means padme shouldntve died in childbirth and should probably have died/ left the twins when they were at least a year or two old. this would also give more reason as to why the lars have luke call them aunt and uncle rather than mom or dad. i think what probably shouldve happened is that padme got pregnant right before anakin was shipped out at some point so he didnt know he had kids before "dying" and she ended up getting involvef in the rebellion/ fearing for her kids safety and had to get rid of em. literally anything else than what happened in canon lol like wtf is dying of heartbreak get OUT
my final thought i can think of rn is that having hitlers right hand man be a slave is just kinda a strange backstory? like i cant be the only one who doesnt like that. idk. doesnt feel right :/
obv most this stuff is just preference and obv you can argue against most of it. the prequels Do technically work but theyre not great backstory. im also not a fan of how the jedi order and all that mess was established. like you can only be one if youre raised one since diapers but luke literally didnt know what the force was until he was 19 but he ended up being one of the most powerful jedi ever??? yeah. makes perfect sense. :////
i do agree that the prequels r tragic and beautiful in their own right. i think the story they tell is good in some ways and bad in others ans one of the ways they r bad is how they tie in with the originals lol
hope this answers your question :3c or at least helps you see where im coming from :33
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thatdeadaquarius · 2 years ago
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I found one of your sagau posts about language and got me thinking xD
Reader who knows a lot of languages which gets people confused. Are they speaking in their godly language? Are they really that mad that they switched to another language? Why are they smirking like that--- (Aether/Lumine who understood everything trying so hard not to laugh at people's reactions)
Why did I imagine that after a flowery speech Reader delivers a response so blunt the vine boom sfx can be heard---
Reader trying out flowery speech and failing, while the rest of the people in the background are either A.) Trying to convince you that its alright to talk simply (oh now you turn the tables--) or B.) Some of them fainting in devotion/cuteness because their god looks at them so eagerly for feedback
I heard somewhere that Mondstadt is based on Germany and another post about Snezhnaya (bruh whats the spelling 🤣💀) based on Russia, so I thought that while they speak english they also throw in a couple words of their respective language (or in some drunk cases, full out native language). Cue reader just.... 🧍‍♂️🧍‍♀️
Bilingual reader who uses full advantage of their knowledge into making puns and jokes to Cyno----
WE CAUGHT ANOTHER ONE BOYS
YES YES THE PSPSPSPSS NEVER FAILSSS🛐🛐🛐
(subliminalmessagingpspspspsscometomeaskscomepspspspspssubliminalmessaging)
___________
DUDE ive thought abt just making it where Aether/Lumine are the only ones who understand English/ur language and like, while u can (or maybe cant for shenanigans) speak Teyvatian (ew theres gotta be a better word for that?) Theres NOTHING as amazing as the bilingual experience of pranking bitches
Eula gives like a whole poetry book of a speech to you guys to be more responsible abt gliding in the city (its cute <3 shes actually very concerned bc you know you would do sm that would worry her, i mean i know im just flinging myself off of every surface all the time, esp in Mondstadt im not using no stairs💀)
And you just... turn to Aether/Lumine and say smth in English and they bust out laughing
(Or worse, u two are giggling like little shits✨️)
Dont feel too bad Eula, they do this to everyone
(Paimon's constantly on ya'lls case abt it)
Like u didnt even say anything rude (probably), as u explained to Eula, but its like this all the time, sm ppl even find themsleves jealous of this bond you two have got, tho whether they are jealous of Aether/Lumine or you is still still hard to tell,,)
IM SO GLAD ONE PERSON OUT THERE GOT THE FLOWERY SPEECH -> YOU REPLY -> VINE BOOM 🤝🤝🤝 THING I WAS TRYING TO CONVEY
Thats deadass like how i imagine half the time it would be like talking to ppl, esp if ur critizing smth that person was doing lmao (like roasting them)
Its even funnier if like, u didnt hear the vine boom so to speak, like u got ur back to the rest of the characters/npcs while ur talking to this one person and u dont even know u just said smth that's got like one person crying laughing
(KAEYA, aether/lumine, hu tao, KAVEH, Venti, childe, Yae Miko, SCARAMOUCHE/WANDERER, beidou, off the top of my head)
Another one is just standing there in shock, when will they unfreeze? Only time can tell
(Zhongli, jean, eula, keqing, ayaka, ganyu, kuki shinobu, once again off the top of my head theres so many characters at this point in genshin help)
They're just like,, processing still, theyre probably overthinking everything u say bc to them you give so little information 💀 i can see the like transparent images of their thinking faces floating around them now LMAO
(Alhaitham, zhongli again rip, DILUC, kaeya's also laughing at him not just you his stomach hurts help him, Ei, XIAO, ALBEDO, Ayato but he'd also be muffling a laugh, Kazuha maybe i can also see him just giggling n shit, Kokomi, CYNO, Tighnari but also he'll react like its the funniest joke ever while he's trying to actually think abt it, so he just ends up standing there, thinking outloud, then cracking up over and over again lol)
Oh Cyno u sweet summer child, as soon as u started making puns it was over for him, no one can stop you, even if Tighnari can't understand ur language rn he can definitely just sense there's bad jokes being made, esp if Cyno gets it and his lip like, twitches upward or even worse, he chuckles.
(Tighnari's totally getting onto him for corrupting you)
pLEASE US ACTUALLY TRYING TO SPEAK LIKE THEM 😭😭😭
What a cute image, just some of them reassuring us and some of them thinking its cute for trying, and we look around the room when we try for feedback i know i would 😭😭
If i actually got close tho they better give me a headpat or smth
___________
Anyway THANK YOU for the ask!! (subliminalmessingpspspspspscometomeaskscomepspsps)
That was a BEAUTIFUL✨️ thing to read, got my heart doin backflips and shit 😳😊🥰
God this is so long im so sorry everyone
Cheers,
🌒🌊🌧Aquarius♒️🌌🌘
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minipisi-is-dumb · 2 years ago
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idk y'all but the whole "saiki does not fall in love because of his powers if you take them away he would be normal" and similar variations of those arguments against aroace saiki headcanons (which. why do you feel so attacked for a hc that you need to bend canon in weird ways to justify ships that make no sense) make me so uncomfortable bc they feel just like when people say that ppl who are aspec wouldn't be aspec if they weren't ND or traumatized or mentally ill or whatever similar.
like ok nobody knows if me being ND is what makes me aspec or trans or what but i know i AM regardless. also you can't fucking separate my neurodivergency from me that's not how it works i am not a separated person from it IT LITERALLY CHANGES NY BRAIN STRUCTURE but whatever
wether you see saiki as autistic, gifted (i know i do lmao), both or any other type of ND you cannot deny the man's got HEAVY coding, and that coding comes along with his powers
like if you have watched the show you would 100% get it but the guy is so ND is actually pathetic (affectionate) and part of the feeling of separation is enhanced by him being a literal psychic whose powers work as an extension of his symptoms (the whole "i can hear every thought in a 200km ratio and it physically exhausts me to not be able to filter thoughts" is such a latent inhibition deficit MOOD okay)
so what if he's aspec because of his power/neurodivergency? does that mean he's less aspec? that his experiences in the show are less real? nah they're not
and I'm not saying this all because ooooo having a pink hair anime guy aroace in fan communities is so important oooooo but more like. the entire reasoning of people invalidating it all. like the mentality and the obsession with shipping him just bc he's the protagonist. that type of invalidation can pass onto real life stuff
like ive lived good ol aphobia and dismissal of me being ND going together, not always but truly a handful so that this entire thought process pisses me off but ugh whatever works are stupid everything is stupid is not like anyone who ships saiki in generic romcom style while hating on any and all aspec hc of him are even gonna care that a lot of their arguments instead of being "nah i just don't personally interpret him like that death of the author or whatever" go to "he is actually NOT because his POWERS ARE TO BLAME that he doesn't see people he just sees their bones because of XRAY and he doesn't like kokomi because he READS HER THOUGHTS!!!!!" like have anyone in this app heard what a metaphor is
eh whatever im tired i just wanted to get it off my chest i need to cook my dinner n rewatch the show
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