#like i SO deserve it but please god no

[nexus-nebulae]

shoutout to people who don't have a "before" the trauma.

shoutout to people who don't have any sweet or nostalgic childhood memories. to people who don't remember enough of their childhood to know what the before was like. to people who lost their innocence before they ever learned the word for it. to people whose pasts were too painful to keep around in any form. to people who only knew trauma, and don't have an idea of what life would be like without it. to people who can't long for "the better days" because there weren't any.

you deserve a good future. i hope it's there for you soon.

[lazylittledragon]

ok i swear i'm not going to talk about my breakup forever but the thing that just keeps bothering me:

i know that not getting what you need in a relationship is a COMPLETELY valid reason to end it but also. i feel like having a very vulnerable moment where i opened up about my struggles with intimacy and being relieved that i didn't have to keep doing things i wasn't comfortable with, then being dumped a YEAR later because of my lack of intimacy. is something i should be allowed to be very hurt by???

[seefasters]

like!!!!!!

[cerasus--flores]

i have many thoughts of varying purity about webtoon dkos but there's one thing about him on a character design level that really stands out to me

the defining traits of the demon king are his horns and his wings. there's the claws and eyes and the recent pointy ear addition but they're negligible, the two traits he always has are his horns and his wings, and on his og design they're just sorta... there.

on the webtoon? his wings and horns are massive. the horns are the lenght of his face and the wings could fit people inside them. they're really large proportionally, cause dokja's body is still its regular size, and that's because of what they mean.

those traits are the identifying visual markers of the 73rd demon king and the demon king of salvation, which are both roles that are "larger than life". too big for a mere incarnation or a simple human. and right now kdj is just an incarnation! a human still! it's the whole point of it all.

his demonic attributes are too big on him because he's still too human. he's still too small; he's not enough of a threat, not inhumane enough to fit into his wings. so even though he has horns and claws and wings he's still tiny. he's still dressed in purity white. he's still asking to be killed. and he could grow into his wings, he can become that grand demon king, that grand constellation.

he just needs to let his human self die first.

[natsmagi]

honestly the more i hear about engstars and its TLs the more i absolutely dread the inevitable release of poltergeist and what may ensue from it, bc if if the translators themselves are already invalidating arashis identity then i Really Truly do not want to see how theyll translate natsume and tsumugis microaggressions/transphobia towards her. esp since ive noticed a rise in people being comfortably transphobic towards her, and i REALLY do not wish to see natsume and tsumugi being stupid fucking morons be used as evidence to discredit her

and i think this is all the more reason why its VERY IMPORTANT for engstars to DIRECTLY ACKNOWLEDGE arashi and her gender. bc sometimes characters are STUPID and RUDE and APATHETIC. enstars is a story with NUANCED and FLAWED CHARACTERS, and when a character is being a fucking asshole youre meant to PROVE THEM WRONG. but they dont even acknowledge arashi as a girl themselves. so, if you do use engstars, please keep pressuring them bc omfg this is so bad and i can only see it getting worse

[yumedoca]

As a little farewell gift to the remake, here's a small analysis on Ataru and Lum's final exchange in the series.

Personally, I find this exchange very interesting and that it has two very important meanings to it, especially considering how it is phrased:

Ataru saying that he'll eventually say 'I love you', just not now. He basically admits that he loves her here, but indirectly ;) Like, he's not even trying to be tsundere!! There's no 'I don't like you, idiot!!', no 'Yeah, whatever, I guess...' and no ignoring or going 'hmph!'!! He openly states how he feels here and I find this incredible character development considering he could've said any of the previous mentioned but didn't. Early, middle and even the first half of later UY era Ataru would never say such words and would've easily jumped at the options I mentioned but here he basically says 'I love you but I'm not going to say the words until my deathbed'!! It really shows how far Ataru's come especially regarding his relationship with Lum. His major character arc in the series is about growing more comfortable with showing his true self and accepting his emotions and you can really see that he has mostly achieved that by the end. It's beautiful to see how much he's changed and even though this is already so great, what really gets me going feral 100% is the second meaning to their exchange..

The subtle promise in this exchange. Lum tells Ataru the she'll make him say 'I love you' even if it takes her entire life, which suggests that she won't leave him alone till he says the words. Her adding 'even if it takes my entire life' to it, more or less would have what she says mean 'Hopefully, I'll be with you, for life'. Ataru's response is that he'll say it on his deathbed which means that Ataru would only say the magic words right before he dies, which would mean that he wants Lum to be with him till then or to say it in simpler terms, his response would more or less mean 'I want to be with you for life, too'. And since he's supposed to be saying 'I love you' on his deathbed, his words here could also mean 'I'll love you till the end'. This acts as a sort of promise between them, a promise that they'll keep loving and being with each other till the end of time.

To others, it seems like all they're going to do is fight for life, but Ataru and Lum know what they truly mean because no one understands them more than each other.

[so-very-small]

the worst part of being a g/t fan is when you really get into a piece of Media, like a book or show or whatever. but all your friends who like The Media arent into g/t. and all your g/t mutuals have never heard of The Media before. so you’re just alone going nuts with sizey concepts no one you know could comprehend

[killerandhealerqueen]

Every time I go in the Logan Sargeant tag on here and read about how Williams is fucking him over, my urge to bite something grows

[pyrosomatic-metamorphosis]

OH. okay so normally i dont touch discourse with a 20 ft pole, but this has been niggling at my brain tonight and i finally realized why

the people who are mad at qbbh for the memory loss and “dodging consequences” dont understand that he doesnt want to dodge consequences. Like they cant know that, they werent focused on him when he was literally feeding himself to the soul vultures and planning his eventual imprisonment and also. The Many Many Many hints he made towards suicide/sacrifice/Just Fucking Dying.

ccbbh is a subtle roleplayer, he’s been building this shit up for two whole months- it was day FIVE of the eggs going missing that he resolved to do whatever it took (hurting his friends) to get the eggs back. It was day three that he followed in dapper’s footsteps and started feeding himself to the soul vultures (and gaining a Massive headwound beneath his hood in the process- you can only see it if you go on namemc and remove the layers). He’s got impaired judgement. Even the memory issues arent a new thing- i cant remember exactly when they started, but one of the first big moments i remmeber was september 30th where he spent an hour falling into a delusional frenzy searching his base for cameras that he forgot he asked aypierre to plant.

The super murder of purgatory and the memory loss afterwards probably all feels very sudden for people who havent been following his story, but as someone who has been- all of this has been true to character. The only cheap swings he’s made have been combat-based in purgatory, and even the motive for those was built up in rp.

People are calling for consequences, but he has alrwady been experiencing self-inflicted consequences for months. The blue on his usual outfit is blood. This recent memory loss isnt a restart to get away with the atrocities - it is yet another consequence of his egg-protecting complexes and the ways he punishes himself for failing them.

he is NOT a moral character. he’s a demon hiding in plain site. he has eaten people. he has killed people. he understands the cruelty of his actions, and the consequences of them for the loved ones of his victims. but it matters when that harm is being done to his loved ones. he’ll still do it, because he will do anything for the eggs, but it matters, and that means that he has already started the process of self-inflicting those much-demanded consequences

[lokiiied]

okay so like, this episode especially is when the fruity four physical space/touching barrier really breaks and i love it and there’s so many parallels between steddie & ronance and i NEVER EVEN NOTICED this last gif moment…EDDIE’S HAND ON STEVE’S SHOULDER AND THEN AS SOON AS HE REALISES/STEVE LOOKS AT HIM HE PULLS AWAY AND YOU CAN SEE IT IN HIS FACE HE’S LIKE SHIT BUT STEVE KEEPS LOOKING AT HIM LIKE HE FORGOT THEY JUST MANAGED TO COMMUNICATE W THE OTHERS I CANT—

[miutonium]

Hi hi I have returned once again to dress up my sillies in clothes they deserved to be in

Anyway timelapse undercut :3

Anyway sorry for my indecisiveness when I was drawing this I planned on making the timelapse and then I was like nah but then I was like wait a minute maybe I do wanna record so I finally give in and hit record timelapse while I was doing the shadow base 😅

[kindahoping4forever]

Luke via Shan Rizwan on IG

[you-know-i-get-itt]

aaron minyard appreciation post

[rmbunnie]

Red Hood Characterization

This is really long so I'm putting a cut here, I've been thinking about Jason Todd's character motivations and the question of whether or not his actions are based in a Moral Code (I don't think so, not to say he's without any morality) and I talk about that in more depth here.

I saw someone say on here that Titans: Beast World: Gotham City was some of the best Jason Todd internal writing they'd seen in a while, and I've been a Red Hood fan for 8 years or so now? pretty much since I read comics for the first time, so I went and checked out and I thought it was good! The way the person I saw talking about it as if it was rare and unusual made me wonder though, because as well-written as i thought his stances on crime were, there wasn't really anything in it that went against the way I conceptualize Jason?

This kinda plays into a larger question I've been thinking about for a while with Jason though, which is that, do people think that the killing is part of a fundamental worldview that motivates him a la batman, and that worldview is the reason he does the things he does?? Because 8 years ago i was a middle schooler engaging with fiction on the level that a middle schooler does, so I simply did not put much thought into it beyond "poor guy :(" but ever since I actually started trying to understand consistent characterization, I don't really see Jason as someone who's motivated by a moral code in his actions the way batman or superman is!

tbh my personal read is that he's a very socially-motivated guy, his actions from resurrection to his Joker-Batman ultimatum in utrh always seemed to me like every choice made leading up to his identity reveal was either a. to give him the leverage and skill necessary to pull off his identity reveal successfully, or b. to twist the knife that little bit more when he does let Bruce find out who he is. Like iirc there's a Judd Winick tweet like "yeah tldr he chose Red Hood as his identity because it's the lowest blow he could think of." And I think that's awesome, I think character motivations rooted so deeply in character's relationships and emotions are really fun to read! I also think it's where the stagnation/flatness of his character comes from in certain comics, because if his main motivation is one event in one relationship that passes, and he is not particularly attached to anything in his life or the world by the time that comes to pass, it's a little harder to come up with a direction to go with the character after that, because there isn't much of a direction that aligns with something the character would reasonably want? But I do think solving this by saying "all of the morally-off emotionally driven cruelty he did on his way to spite Batman was actually reflective of his own version of Batman's stance that's exactly the same except he thinks it's GOOD to kill people" isn't ideal. To be fully honest, it seems to me like he never particularly cared one way or the other about killing people to "clean Gotham of crime," he just did everything he could to get the power necessary to pull off his personal plans, and took out any particularly heinous people he encountered along the way (like in Lost Days.) Not to say I think the fact he killed people keeps him up at night anymore than everything else in his life events, I just never really thought he was out there wholeheartedly kneecapping some dude selling weed or random guy robbing a tv store for justice.

Looping wayyy back to my question, Is this (^) contradictory to the way he's written/the overall average perception of the character? Because like I enjoyed his writing in Beast World i have zero significant issue with anything there, I just didn't believe it would be a hot take, like yeah, that is Jason. It's been a while since I've read utrh and lost days, but I don't think my takeaway directly contradicts either of those too bad iirc. Idk all this to say I think Jason killing and being alright with killing is an obvious and objective fact, but i guess i've always seen it as more of a practical tactic than a moral belief, and I think taking the actions made during the lowest points of a character's life where he is obsessively focused on this ONEEEE thing and trying to apply it as a Motivating Stance to everything he's done after that, doesn't really follow logically for me.

[napping-sapphic]

god im going to be such a handful to someone some day @ anyone who decides to love me in the future im so sorry im like this thank u for liking me anyway oh my god

[enhanced-operatives-division]

Let her grieve