#like can ppl stop being horrible | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

angelsdean · 2 years ago

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umm. something not so chill just happened.

#some sketchy dude with a truck was messing with my mom's car at 3am ???#my mom woke up hearing noises outside and when she looked she saw this guy reaching under her car #and she started banging on the window to startle him and then he took off but. uh. wtf #now i can't sleep and i'm feeling so anxious #apparently there's been a lot of reports of ppl stealing car parts lately #like can ppl stop being horrible #we can't afford to replace car parts #not to mention how dangerous it could be if they take something important and we don't know

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bonefall · 1 year ago

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considering spiderleg is like *that* and squirelflight being diehard fire alone i cant imagine them being friends in BB like they were sort of in the canon books. were they or did it disolve after time passed and spiderleg got more into traditional/thistle law. also who were her other friends? i saw daisy was in another ask but who else (really eager to know who booed at mousefur and thronclaw lol)

So to begin with, Squirrelflight is in an odd place, generation-wise. She is born while Firestar is on his quest with Brokenstar, and grows up in a period of peace and prosperity.

Unfortunately she keeps failing her goddamn assessments

So while Leafstripe is a fully trained Cleric, Sorreltail recovered from being hit by a car and graduated, and Ashfur tried to hold out for her for a while before moving up, Squirrelpaw is here absolutely eating leaf litter with her wrecklessness

Goldenflower, her mentor, even tries to tell Firestar that she's not being vindictive, just in case he got the wrong idea. He assures her that, no. No he understands <:/

So Spider, Shrew, and Squirrel end up as apprentices together. There was a time where they were really close, getting in trouble in spite of their three strict mentors. Bad influence trio, all of them coming from respected parents and doing their best to embarass them.

That only started to change when Squirrelpaw went on the Great Journey, but then returned just in time to see Shrewpaw die. A lot of things were different, now. Squirrelpaw came back exalted for being on a holy quest. Spiderpaw had watched a lot of his clanmates die. She was spending more time with Brambleclaw; he had become very protective of his little brother, Birchkit.

They had both grown in a flash. Hard times will do that to you.

During the Great Journey, Spiderpaw was really close to the other Clan apprentices while Squirrelpaw hung out with the Sundrown Patrol. Spider looks back at this time in his life with a lurch in his stomach that he can't put into words.

He was there when Paw Soup was made. Talonclaw and Smokefall were friends of his even more than they were friends of little Birchkit. Spiderleg just left it behind when they got to the Lake, where his little brother never could. Clan loyalty, strength, honor... all that. He felt like he had to make a choice.

As a person, Spiderleg is torn in many directions by all of the things that happened to him. His head-of-construction father, his educator mother, his friend who won status by breaking the rules, three dead siblings before his warriorhood, the destruction of his ancestral home, the journey that challenged everything, his mentor Thornclaw, the backfired meeting, ardor for Daisy, crashing down with unwanted kits...

His consistent trait is that he's easily swept up in whatever fills him with the most passion, tossing himself into things until a bubbling sense of disgust makes him break it off. Regardless of if it was the good thing to do or not.

Religious euphoria and self-flagellation just seems to stabilize that impulse, for him.

The last time he was friends with Squilf was during their vigil upon reaching the Lake. They did it together, because they were both long overdue. He thought about Shrewpaw, and wondered if she did too.

But neither one of them broke the silence between them. They still haven't.

#better bones au #BB!TNP #BB!Squirrelflight #BB!Spiderleg #Ppl don't talk enough about that horrible feeling of being at the deathbed of a friendship #Knowing it's dying in front of you #But not knowing how to say goodbye to it. Or if you can stop it.#But the worst part is that even when it dies it hangs in the air #Is it secretly alive? Or is it just haunting you #There's a history between us. Is the look of recognition in your eyes like a shared glance at a grave?#Or is it a silent prayer that what we had can come back from the dead #But too much has changed.#If they hung out past that vigil it was always with that tension in the air.#Until Squilf broke it off with Ash and their friend groups irrevocably split #Though any chance of reconnecting was definitely torched by that Backfired Meeting

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lord-squiggletits · 6 months ago

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Part of why I hate this fandom's take on Autobots vs Decepticons is ppl (mainly 'con fans honestly) who can't have any nuance of the situation whatsoever and love to write plots like "oh the humans are racist and abusive towards Cybertronians so this is how Megatron is right" no actually I don't think colonialism/imperialism and racism are justified so long as you can point the finger and say "they were the aggressors first" or "their hands are no cleaner than ours bc their society sucks too" sorry. Please come up with better sociopolitical narratives in your war story.

#squiggposting #i'm too tired to like actually care about this any more #and ppl's fandom takes don't necessarily represent their IRL views #but i'm just like. oh so i see that you want to write mature stories with politics and dealing with bigotry. that's cool!#now do it in a way that actually refutes bigotry and makes some sort of attempt at resolution #bc 'oh humans are just as bad and evil so it's fine if we colonize them' isn't the pro-con take ppl think it is lkdsfjlsdkfs #honestly this is what john barber got right in his story even tho the politics in his became overbearing #at least he's like the one dude who rightfullly pointed out 'uhhh organics have history with cybertronians that makes them very justified #'in not trusting them'#but my mistake is expecting the average 'con fan to disengage from the 'revolution' part to talk about the racism and imperialism lmao #if ppl weren't cowards they would be able to write characters as problematic and bigots and imperialists #but still show their humanity and point out how the cycle of retribution needs to end at some point #and how killing everyone who ever did anything bad (esp for a race as long lived as theirs) isnt a sustainable model of society #that's my PROBLEM man like stop being COWARDS acknowledge that your heroes can be shitty ppl #instead of framing things as good guys vs bad guys and then framing absolution as being only for the good guys #what if good and bad didn't exist and we were all shitty in some way and none of us inherently deserve forgiveness. what then #what if you wrote a story where you had to deal with the reality of rehabilitating ppl who have genuinely done horrible things #what if you wanted to rehabilitate society but realized the majority of ppl in it are monsters. what then?#do you only extend forgiveness and peace to the ppl who got thru with no moral compromises?#do you want to kick the majority/almost all of your race to the curb and give them no mercy/second chances?#what if ppl wrote stories where sociopolitical issues had no good/bad guys and no easy solutions #what if ppl had the courage and ethical fortitude to say 'everyone here sucks actually'#anyways sorry for the rant

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the-moogle-of-your-nightmares · 3 months ago

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one thing i really deeply wish is that i'd had access as a kid to the plural community and information that are more easily available today, instead of my first experience with plural community which both took it seriously and was nonjudgmental having been 10's era tul/pa.info lmao

#moogletalks #in some ways it was a wonderful community; and it taught me a lot of really helpful things #and made me feel validated and hopeful that This is a Thing That You Can Continue to Be and Develop in an Adult Life #instead of feeling like there was a time limit for when plurality stopped being Childlike Imagination and started being Craziness(tm)#(lots to unpack there lol)#.....in other ways not only was there Some Real Fuckery going on in the community in general; on an interpersonal basis #but i cannot overstate how horrifically toxic and damaging some of the things it taught me about plurality were #and how when i entered the phase of young adulthood where i realized the approach it had demanded of me was unsustainable to my survival #instead of having other perspectives on hand to go 'hey yeah you're not torturing your parts to death out of laziness if they go dormant'#'and/or if you don't spend hours of extremely grueling intensive work at minimum into maintaining them every single day of your life'#'and that if they dissolve into nothing because you Didn't Pay Them Enough Attention and you try to recreate them it won't be the same one'#'and if they DO actually come back as themselves they'll be horribly broken and traumatized and probably hate you forever'#'who the fuck told you that. oh my god?'#all i had to go on was 'either you're plural or you live an actual functional life in the real world; and i can't not do the latter atp'#and the result was repressing myself in an incredibly traumatic way i have just never fully recovered from even now #the fun cherry on top was that later when i *did* try to ask (very kind and well-meaning) plural ppl from another mental health community #if anything i described sounded familiar to their own experiences; or ones they had heard from other people #their response was pretty much 'idk that doesn't sound plural to me; i'm sorry; it's something where if you have it you know :('#me crying my eyes out for days afterward: obviously this reaction is bc i want to appropriate plurality to feel special #and am throwing tantrums at having the bubble broken by Reality #anyway. it's been a lot and yeah i really wish i'd had literally any other affirming plural community as a kid lol #ableism cw #internalized ableism cw #pluralitag #traumatag #adventures in mental illness #disabilitag

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zymstarz · 7 months ago

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yeah sure that's how i'll [re]come out

#zymart #zymtalk #rant in the tags ->#okay listen to me this is really important and also i have a witness. this was not intentionally supposed to be posted on june 1st #the stars just aligned for this to be at its funniest. which means its also easier for me to dismiss LOL #i drew this like a week ago after trying to draw a whole like. 5 page comic about it and then stopping it mid-board #bc it was horrifying imagining being perceived that much. so i needed to make it into a joke instead and this was the funniest route #and then i was like 'UGH. UGH!!!! i can not be 20 and deal with this like im 13. if i dont post it by the end of the week #then [the witness to all my rants on this topic. shoutout to twig bc they got the most of it] can joke abt it as if i did anyway'#and now its the end of the week and i looked at the date and went 'oh my god didnt may just start what happened'#'WAIT ITS JUNE FIRST. GOD. THATS TOO FUNNY TO NOT SAY SOMETHING' and who am i if i dont prioritize the bit honestly #in all honesty. kinda hate it! not bc of internalized homophobia but actually bc of internalized arophobia that has somehow been emphasized #after having my brain shift from '1000% aromantic without a doubt no exceptions' to 'just arospec ig lol??'#but tragically as it turns out. you can not just try and self analyze yourself into speedrunning closure.#horrible news for the oscar zymstarz community frankly #SO i needed a way 2 justify shoving this off my plate and into the trash as fast as possible.#im impatient and cant acknowledge my own emotions. its a flaw im working on it #oh and for all the ppl who know the running gag abt 'my allegations' [i do not have any real allegations for anyone not in jems server]:#that was in fact just a running gag for like well over a year and a half. like that was just a long running bit COMPLETELY unrelated to thi #i only started having this weird sexuality shift or whatever not too long ago lol. like long enough to go through 4 of the 5 stages of grie #[evidently bc like. im posting this. i got close enough to 5 to throw in the towel ykwim]#but on 'oscar zymstarz emotional acknowledgement' time that is....... not long.#but yeah ig tldr like. still ace [thank god] just arospec [probably demiro? i hate trying to figure out my own labels] instead of Aro now #idk none of this is that deep but also like it kinda is unfortunately bc i have to actually talk abt it to be able to ignore it ykwim #but i did! we're done talking abt it now! and now i can act like i dont care and try to make jokes about it to speedrun the rest of it #anyway. Happy Pride everyone. Fukign kitty.#side message to jem. by no means does this mean im not still gonna bully you. its a sign of love but also it is you specific bullying 🫶#you are not safe #edit: this is karma for saying 'thank god'. might be demiace too. this is the worst month of my life /j

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throwawayasoiafaccount · 8 months ago

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Op… you make a lot of interesting claims in this post. To get the facts straight before I go on a rant… 1) George claims that Rhaegar was a love struck prince 2) the books don’t mention anything about any marriages being annulled/anyone being set aside 3) seems like Dorne has no issue with Rhaegar and 4) Ned literally never thinks anything bad about Rhaegar… but thinks ill of Robert.

First off, a man trapped in a duty bound marriage and finding love outside that marriage is completely different from a whoremonger shouting about his love while visiting brothels whenever he could. And guess what… Ned straight up thinks that Rhaegar didn’t seem like someone who’d visit brothels. Robert and Rhaegar couldn’t be any more different.

And when did Lyanna want to be wild and free? When is it ever said that Rhaegar locked her in the tower of joy and that Lyanna was a prisoner?

Ned never even alludes to there being any truth in any of these claims. What we do know is that Lyanna greatly resembles Arya in looks and personality… and Arya wants to be a high septon and kings counselor, meaning Arya wants to have a position of power and not be reduced to a baby making machine. Going off of that… it seems like Lyanna didn’t want to be “wild and free,” she just wanted to be treated with respect. The only reason Arya is even treated like she’s wild is because she doesn’t conform to the Westerosi standards for highborn women.

And of course she’d feel miserable when she heard Aerys killed her brother and father. Aerys. Not Rhaegar. I wouldn’t even be surprised if she felt guilt about what happened, but in the end it was Aerys who brutally killed them. And then Rhaegar goes to protect his family and dies, and then Rhaegar’s family is brutally killed and then Lyanna dies. George did claim that the greatest love stories are the tragedies (i may be misremembering but i know he said something along the lines of that lmao).

Op, you claim that Rhaelyas love would’ve died after getting news of the Starks deaths, and then you try to suggest that Rhaegar may have been keeping Lyanna isolated from news in Dorne… like please pick a story to go with! And Rhaelyas love dying or Lyanna not being kept updated on what was going on outside of Dorne just doesn’t seem to be true. When reading Neds chapters, it seems like Lyanna was fully aware of what happened to Rhaegar’s children and Elia… as Lyanna pleaded with Ned like how Sansa pleaded with Ned to not kill Lady (hope i’m not misremembering here lol). And Rhaegar dying with a woman’s name on his lips (likely Lyanna’s name) and Lyanna clutching a winter rose (this may just be symbolism for baby Jon tbh) until she passed away seems to contradict your belief that their love died.

Also, where are you getting the “Rhaegar would suggest to set aside his kids and wife to marry Lyanna” from? The show? You mention how Lyanna would not be okay with this, and I agree that Lyanna would never be fine with setting Elia and Elia’s children aside. But even thinking that Rhaegar would ever even suggest setting aside Elia and his children is bonkers. Like seriously… there was so much tension between Aerys and Rhaegar that the Royal court was said to have begun looking like the situation before the Dance of the Dragons. And Dorne was Rhaegar’s greatest support! Why would it make any sense for him to annul his marriage with Elia? And please remember that during the sack Rhaenys hid under her fathers bed. The text supports him loving his kids/his child who wasn’t a baby seeking to be protected by him so why would he endanger them and their positions? (and no, disappearing with Lyanna for awhile isn’t him endangering his family. Aerys was the one who endangered his family (hot take brandon was the one who endangered the starks like wth was he thinking???). and tbh it seems like Aerys knew exactly where to find Rhaegar so did Rhaegar and Lyanna even disappear? or were they just keeping their location a secret from the rebels? the rebels who ended up killing Rhaegar’s family?)

I will say that how op first started to characterize Lyanna is something I agree with, her being principled, noble, honorable, and just with a sensitive side seems to be true, but then op goes on to continue to claim that Lyanna was wild and that she had little regard as to how other people perceived her. There’s no reason for us to believe that she didn’t care about what others thought of her or that she was wild and wanted freedom more than anything, it just seems like she dared to tread away from what was expected of Westerosi highborn women and that she didn’t want to be married to Robert. And guess what… Robert ended up being an abuser! *gasp* Lyanna dear… you clocked Robert right away.

And seriously… how does any of what op mentioned back up their claim that Lyanna would never resign herself to the position of a mistress? Is being a mistress/paramour really that bad? Does it truly seem like Lyanna would look down on those women? Her mini me Arya doesn’t look down on the courtesans of Braavos who occupy a similar position as mistresses in society. And it seems like plenty of noblewomen have been mistresses in the past and they are still as respected as a woman can be in Westerosi society. Missy Blackwood and Elaena Targaryen are right there. And Op, if Lyanna was Rhaegar’s mistress, why would you think that Lyanna couldn’t have been happy? Are we going to doubt Ellarias happiness and her love of Oberyn because they weren’t married? Should I doubt Rhaenyra and Harwins happiness because Rhaenyra was married to Laenor? Rhaegar and Elias marriage was not a love match. And if Rhaegar and Lyanna did marry… ever wonder if polygamy was introduced as a Valyrian practice by George to hint at Rhaegar taking a second wife? Should I now doubt Rhaenys and Aegons happiness and love because Rhaenys was Aegons second wife?

Now can we please stop acting like two people married due to duty have any reason to love each other? Nedcat seems to be an exception in Westeros. Lyanna and Rhaegar falling in love isn’t ruining Elia and Rhaegar’s marriage when love wasn’t there in the first place.

haha my whole post is a bit messy i just wanted to get my thoughts out :)

fuckkkk i want to tag more (my tags are a mess lmao no i’ve not gone through them and no they will not make any sense)

#robert was a brute #when did lyanna seem disgusted by roberts bastards?#seems like she was just disgusted by roberts behavior of claiming to love her while visiting brothels #say it with me folks: there’s not a single mention of rhaegar loving elia their marriage was for duty #so no rhaegar is not like robert bc rhaegar found love outside of his marriage of duty #robert treated lyanna like an object and never even saw/loved the real her #lyanna clocked that and later fell in love with a man who loved the real her #aka the knight of the laughing tree #yeah the text hasn’t truly confirmed anything yet but at least my version of events isn’t contradicted by the books #omg ppl need to stop acting like being a mistress is some morally corrupt position god damn #nedcat you will always be famous #but jon snow will always be even more famous #bc he’s rhaelyas love child #rip rhaegar lyanna and elia i’ll save you guys from tumblr bad takes #i love that george makes it clear that marriages of duty can be nasty affairs #and tumblr desides to demonize characters who dared to find love instead of criticizing the system of selling daughters off like broodmares #like bruh i would be sooo happy to learn if elia had a paramour on the side #i’m looking at you elia x ashara shippers #tho i don’t think that they had a romantic relationship i do find it hilarious that ppl who claim rhaegar is horrible and endangered his #…family turn around and applaud elia for potentially doing the same…#couldn’t be me tho i pretend that rhaelya and their children are perfectly happy and that elia found love as well #as i think rhaelya were well in their rights to go against the system that tried making them miserable and i hope elia did the same #these tags are a mess and kinda don’t make sense lmao #rhaegar targaryen you will always be famous #asoiaf fandom critical #rip boar you will be missed #robert deserved worse #ppl need to stop acting like rhaelya is homewrecking when george himself calls elia and rhaegar’s marriage complex #jon will learn that his parents were in love and he’ll learn good shit about them and he’ll think good thoughts about them #and then this fandom will go insane and jon will start being hated like dany for daring to love his parents

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chiistarri · 1 month ago

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need 2 isolate myself and unfriend everyone #asap

#this guy who is still my friend i guess annoys me and ive been avoiding him and he confronted me and cried yesterday and i felt bad but more #ab the situation than our friendship because he puts himself into places without friends by being judgy and rude and wondering why ppl dont #wanna stick around him idk. i guess we're still cool but he clings onto me and its really annoying bc i want him to stop but i dont want to #be rude and hes just getting on my nerves and ik its bad to be like annoyed w ur friends but i literally just .our energies dont match and #its so exhausting to be near him so i need to do the right thing and tell him the truth and let him decide if he wants to cling on more or #not but i already did that tbh yesterday like. i told him i genuinely dont have the energy to match his and he asked 'when can we go back to #being normal' ?? i just said i felt better and comfortable being more alone and off than w him cant he stop. do i need to break his heart #hes really intelligent and hes able to tell these signs so idk why hes so hellbent on being stuck on me when ive literally said he tires me #cant he leave me alone. i already feel bad enough for feeling this way but last yr i didnt get to have any other friends irl bc he would #just cling on and drag or follow me and i barely had time to spend with anyone else and im stuck in a club i dont care for now bc he kept #pushing. like two or three of then actually idk why he cant just understand i dont want this nor any codependency w him anymore when ivebeen #like telling him already #sorry i have tutoring soon but im exhausted and feel horrible but whatever ill be fine etc i just need him to stop #on a brighter note. idk. im going to disney soon #post #vent #to delete #my lover please come home . only person i can admit my feelings directly to !. not on a vague tumblr post lmfao #/nbh btw obv bc why would i post it if it was #i need to play genshin kaedehara kazuha save me please give me a big fat kiss now

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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year ago

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...

#head instructor to the TAs in the lab section i TA for: how r u guys feeling abt the workload?#me who hasnt graded anything since week 1 and spent an hr that morning filling out a patient safety plan: 🙃#listen. we r experiencing symptoms that make us shitty at our job. which is not helpful for a positive outlook #i was also experiencing horrible cramps at the time bc i lost my ibuprofen and 2 days ago i stopped the birth control in a desperate effort #to stop feeling terrible. but in this moment i feel alright. its wild to go from drastically unhappy to like lol wtf was that? anyway stop #being a bby loser. for no obvious reason. im gonna start the birth control again to see if i get depressed again or if that was just me lol #i dont think my therapist understands the depth of my executive functioning issues tho. bc im a grad student and can meet deadlines. like #let me tell u im a fucking disaster abt starting things. i will go back and forth and get nothing done forever. or i do things halfway and #make everything 30 times more difficult later bc no one else understands how my brain works #ah well. itll b fine. sometimes i just get freaked out that i wanna b better and i dont kno how to do that. so i spiral in despair a lil #ill b fine. im good at catching myself before i get too out of control. annoyingly tho i am not currently beating the bip0lar allagations #bc whatever tf is wrong with me i do probably fit the diagnostic criteria for bip0lar 2. i dont kno y that freaks me out so much. i guess #its bc it feels like something i cant just make better thru force of will and i grew up in a home that was very obsessively #health conscious to the point my dad gets anxious abt taking a single ibuprofen. so like ive been conditioned to get freaked out by #medication. literally my grandma will call me and tell me to b suspicious of doctors and to not take medicine unless absolutely necessary.#like lady u r the genetic reason i have 0cd shut the fuck up. also it feels like something that would more negatively affect how ppl think #of u than saying oh yea i get depressed or i have anxiety. like the connotation feels worse im used to just telling ppl whatever tf #my problem is. so the idea of holding something back feels weird. which annoys me bc i dont think there should b so much of a stigma. its #bullshit. anyway idk. im tired. i was trying to think of a comfort tv show with my therapist and all i could think was the terror #when im depressed i wanna watch those English mother fuckers suffer and die. i just lov that show so much. harry g00dsir my beloved. the #most me coded character to ever exist #unrelated

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haemosexuality · 2 years ago

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hm. in a way i know i am lucky slash privileged that my (probable) autism is mild/light/high-functioning/whatever the appropriate term is enough that it took me years to realize its autism, and that often the reaction to telling someone that i think i might be autistic is "what? but youre so normal! you were a normal child!". cuz like. some people have it way worse etc i can probably survive without help. but also i often wish that it wasnt and that it was severe enough that i got diagnosed early on (or at all). bc that would mean that at least ppl like, know why im Like this. that id know why im like this. that id get help. etc. ik this is like not actually what would have happened and that ppl who are "more autistic" get treated horribly but ig its kinda like that thing where ppl who werent traumatized in their childhood but are still fucked up wish they were actually traumatized so theyd have a justification for being like this (something i also feel). chipped cup wishing it was a broken cup. yk

#even more bc i have that ''can survive without help but damn would some help be good'' swag #like sure i can live like this it also makes me have attacks and want to kms tho #like i still. have symptoms. and need help. im just very good at pretending i dont. and not asking for it. yk?#realizing i am probably autistic made me realize just How Much i cant function sometimes. how much i repress and dont think ab #always have but before i called it (whips out a comedically long paper with a list in it) anxiety and depression and just being introverted #and being a bad person and being toxic and just being really into thinks and being naturally bad at having friends and being emotional and #having anger issues and being a irritable kid and being a shy kid and being immature and being mature for my age #and being a picky eater and being annoying and being dumb and being lazy and being a bad daughter and #anyways you get my gist #like how lucky am i that theres certain stuff i ''realized i could do'' after reading ab autism or behaviors that i repressed when theres #ppl thay cannot stop and have been treated horribly for it yk

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daz4i · 1 year ago

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weirdest thing i get told is that I'm strong or resilient. girl i crumble into dust on a weekly basis. i only take the shape of a person the next day bc the wind blows me back into that. i do not want to be doing any of this

#i think. i just don't want ppl to think this is me being strong #bc i feel so weak. the smallest gust of wind makes me fall and fail to get up #when i say i never recovered from anything that has ever happened to me i mean it #it feels like my past and the way it shaped me into this horrible creature keeps pulling me down a bottomless pit #and i feel powerless to stop it. mostly because i don't want to #and i don't WANT to be strong. so how can i be? can you carry a weight without intending to? i don't think so (insert atlas allegory here)#and saying I'm resilient feels like a straight up lie (which is funny since this is what my name means i think). i am like an open wound #a sandcastle constantly getting washed by the waves and my loved ones are a kid building it over and over #...I'm being very poetic rn. most of this is bullshit. sorry. i haven't created in a long while #point is. i hate being called that. bc it's wrong. and if i ever do get better and start wanting to live somehow -#- then being called strong now when I'm doing this bad feels like an insult to my future self #and if I'm strong now then imagine the astronomical strength i would need to actually stop falling and start moving #i wish i was dead and rotting in the ground rn #vent #lots of these tonight. sorry. idk what's going on. maybe it's hormonal shit. maybe my lack of near goal. maybe life just sucks #(all of these are true and combined into one. so. I'm at my lowest ig)

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dexaroth · 1 year ago

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i honestly wish i could make characters/adopts as like, a job. or a side hustle. theres nothing better than someone saying they like x y and z and then figuring out a way to get the best but still compatible characteristics and colors and. getting something awesome out of it

i dont like the whole culture around it though. in fact i hate most of it and the petty dramas or outright harassment some people have to endure.. i also dont like the idea of putting your heart into an adopt just for it to never get sold. plus it just so happens that, as with commissions, it turns out my lifetime goal of being a nobody on the internet doesnt exactly.. allow me to get clients at all lol. and i dont like all the marketing you have to do as well. but making characters is fun!! aoeuaeuaughh

i like the idea of design trades but i just never get attached to any oc that isnt my own and i feel bad bc i dont get the oc any use.. i personally feel pretty sad if that happens to my designs but it doesnt affect me so badly bc i dont check on ppl i made designs for X]

#i also dont like the idea of bad people owning characters i made.. getting my name associated with people like that. horrible.#i already have that sentiment towards commissions too which is why i stopped promoting them and just like. sticking a post it saying i can>#>make them in my bios lol.#and i also dont like the idea of getting an oc from someone who turned out to be bad. its such a common thing..#like this is almost certainly being too afraid of everything going bad but goddddd its like every month that some person with an>#>awesome art style or musician or funny guy gets outed as a pedo/harasser/abuser/etc and its always ppl who seem somewhat decent #its like im a magnet of bad people when i go out of my comfort zone. its all bells and whistles then Boom its another piece of shit #both online and irl. especially irl but online it just gets worse #erm. everything sux. thanks for coming to my ted talk *trips and breaks my neck #dextxt

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unproduciblesmackdown · 1 year ago

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also quite the illustration in wags being like "'not asking permission' - wags" and plowing through someone expressing a physical boundary but he was already intending to use physical violence & violation & assumed corresponding distress as a tool to get his way....amidst the typicality, "correctness," permissibility of all that around here like five times an hour