#like I've actually got nothing to live for
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batmanisagatewaydrug · 2 days ago
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hey i was wondering if itd be cool if i drew your abortion road trip lovers? and if it is cool do you have physical descriptions for them or general vibes or can i just make shit up?
lmaooooo @birdy-brained and I came up with whole character concepts for them, there's not a LOT in the way of physical descriptors but these are the vibes as I've been imagining them
Lids (he/him)
pregnant (uh oh)
5 foot nothing on a good day
hoped that T would give him a beard but he's got two (2) chin hairs
likes tattoos but doesn't have any cause he's Scared of needles (does his T in gel form)
pocketknife collection
wears a lot of ripped jeans + Don't Look At Me hoodies
fun patches though
acne
lives in a queer housing co-op from hell
can't drive
ANXIETY!!!!!
works as a 24/7 gas station cashier (hates it but kind of loves it)
Buck (they/them)
the sperm donor (rip)
6 foot two inches+
long hair (either wears it loose or a messy half bun) + mustache + short beard
covered in shitty tattoos; does stick and pokes as a side hustle
playing acoustic guitar in the coffee shop
dresses like a thrift store fucked a ren fair
likes big skirts
smudged eyeliner + chipped nail polish
lives with their former bandmates who tried to be a polycule then broke up and now they're not a band anymore :/
van friend
lethally chill. like, kind of pisses people off with how chill they are? please stand up for yourself, Buck.
has like five side hustles and 0 regular job
they fucked at a house show; they were both there because Lids' housemate's metamour's sister's boyfriend's college roommate was playing and Buck is friends with the college roommate.
anyway you absolutely 100% don't have to draw them like this, it's nowhere in the actual post and you're so free to imagine them however you want!! I strongly encourage that, this is just how the characters have shaped up for me since I first wrote the idea down lmao
also I'm tagging this as "abort mission" because that's what my housemate and I started calling the idea
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formerplumi · 9 hours ago
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USED A SUA IMG IN ONE OF YOUR BATFAM POST imagine a luka reader. the family desperate to reach you and due to lack of memories of what You were like since they all neglected you, started just making shit up about you. yes, of course youre angelic, kind and so darling to them! youd never hurt a fly and your soul is such a forgiving one... until they look you up online properly and see you gay baiting someone to get them shot
- prologue
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PAUSE anon you cooked, omg. (for those who don't know who luka is i've put a very small summary of his character right at the end.)
honestly i've just been using sua as a poster girl, but a reader with luka's characteristics is so interesting... after being relocated from your "father's" underground business dealings to gotham to live with your real family, it'd be natural to stay reclusive because of the change in atmosphere.
i imagine a luka-ish reader would try to socialise more with the family than the current insert, but their attempts would be unmeaningly unsettling. an innate feeling would rise in the batfam that didn't make them dislike you, per say, just unintentionally avoid you.
you can't be much bothered with it, since even in your previous living conditions, there'd be people who liked you, and people who didn't. you knew how to work around it
so you redirect your focus. you'd been treated like an adult as you were being raised, so you had your goals and motivations figured out at this age already. for a handful of years in the manor, you'd work to keep up the fame you'd built up with your old "father", fame that slightly dissolved after your sudden disappearance from the screens; your escape from the industry.
eventually, when you decide to move out to perhaps further your prospects and influence, there's a buzz in the media at the sudden reappearance of the angle-voiced child star who was taken off the big screens after their "father" got involved with court dealings.
this is probably what eventually alerts the family to your absence in the manor, and in the shame that they couldn't notice it without the help of a third party, they scrounge around in their memory for good exchanges with you. just to have some semblance of the kid who wandered around aimlessly in the house. the kid they shooed away without ever actually shooing them away.
when they find nothing; they try to make stuff up. "angle-voiced child star", so you must've been soft-spoken, sympathetic, angelic person too, right? yeah, yeah you must've been a darling... how could they be so ignorant of you?
their shame somewhat morphs their unease at your old attempts to talk to them, into a shy child's timid want to talk to a new family in a new area, without any help whatsoever.
oh you poor, poor little kid.
i imagine it wouldn't be too difficult for them to find content of you, since your net-presence sky-rocketed after returning to the music industry. but ohh just imagine their surprise when they get access to an underground website streaming some sick stage-show human trafficking project, and see you there?? whatever are you there for? doesn't your fame generate a fortune? what in the world would you need to be on this... show for?
idk how the "getting them shot" thing could play into any other place other than a dark-web game show tbh. maybe they don't initially recognise that the videos up there are for such a thing, only after seeing you walk away from an applauding audience, get surprised by the sound of a shot and the image of your opponent lying dead on the stage ground, do they bother to investigate the ordeal. but this time, as vigilantes, and not failed family.
they'll just... save you along the way, yeah? 'save' you.
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luka is a character from a series called alien stage, and you can find the episodes uploaded on youtube by vivinos. luka's established as a well known, famous character within the alien stage 'tournament', who's participated in the whole thing before, and has a significant amount of aliens/audience rooting for him.
his character on it's own looks beautiful, and is dubbed "prince" by his fans, but on his first appearance in round 5, he is portrayed as somewhat unfeeling and manipulative.
better characterisation is provided on alien stage's official accounts, with comics and patreon uploads. the "father" i refer to in the above imagine is referring to luka's alien owner.
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wolfpants · 3 days ago
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erised tidings
Unfortunately I had to drop out of @hd-erised this year due to being flakier than a 99p* cone, but that didn't cut short my Erised journey because I had the pleasure of betaing 3 absolutely stellar fics that I want to scream about from the rooftops. Listed in alphabetical order, because each is as excellent as the next and they all hold a very special place in my cold heart.
Thank you so much to my lovely pals who let me feel like I was taking part in the fest even when I wasn't. I'm very lucky indeed. 🖤
In a Year's Turning by @hoko-onchi-writes is not only a gorgeous rekindled-romance by way of delicately mending the tears in a relationship so romantic, so beautifully feelsy and tender (and hot, my god is it hot), but at its heart it's an emotional and important exploration of parenthood and family and what it feels like to watch your child grow up as the magical, wonderous but also at times unsympathetic and cruel world moves too quickly around them and you. I got so choked up reading this for Hoko, so many times. A beauty of a fic. The Melting Point of Wax by @oknowkiss is a riot of originality and sexiness and holy popes racing around the Vatican on broomsticks? Honestly sometimes I just want to crawl right into Elaine's big, wonderful mind and have a poke around in there, their ideas are like nothing I've ever seen cooked up anywhere else, and what's more, they're always translated so sharply; Elaine's writing is full of life and wit, and at the centre there's always the tender heart I so crave when it comes to Drarry, just thrumming and constant and waiting to be uncovered fully. Really fucking great, this one. The Pain From an Old Wound by @citrusses had me gasping for more every time Lor updated the doc. This is a grown-up, swoon-worthy, gothic-tinged romance weaved with clever magic theory, outstanding dialogue, and a romantic Drarry history (and reunion) that feels absolutely lived-in and achy but also really fun as we get to see the two exes snark back and forth (jealousy. my. beloved.) as they come together to work through Harry's crisis. Gorgeously rendered, elegant prose.
I can't wait to dig into the fics I've not gotten around to reading yet. This year's fest has been an absolute banger!
*they're actually like £5 or something now... inflation... economy...
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sky-scribbles · 20 hours ago
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Party Banter with Rook!Blackwall
Harding: You know, for a moment back there, I thought you might actually get through to Solas.
Thom: Regret’s something we have in common. I thought… if I reached out to him, told him I understood what guilt drives you to do…
Harding: But no. ‘Do not compare your regrets with mine, Thom Rainier!’
Thom: He’s right, though. He can at least say he did his crimes trying to stop tyrants. I did mine for coin.
Harding: Uh, yeah, and then you faced up to it and decided no one else was going to get hurt for it except you. Solas is right. He’s nothing like you.
Lucanis: Do we have a problem, Warden Rainier?
Thom: You kill people. For gold.
Lucanis: I do. Venatori. Blood mages. The political rivals of those who hired me.
Thom: And that’s enough for you? Someone flashes a purse, and you’re ready to murder over some nobles’ spat over which of them gets the bigger fancy house?
Lucanis: Depends on the size of the purse.
Bellara: Um, so, about the mayor of D'Meta's Crossing? I just… do you really want someone like that? In the Wardens, I mean.
Thom: I won’t defend him. But he wouldn’t be the first Warden who let innocent people die for gold, and got another chance from the Order.
Bellara: He doesn’t deserve it. Like, really, really doesn’t deserve it.
Thom: No. Neither did I.
Thom: Do you ever get people trying to bribe you? To look the other way, or drop a case, or...
Neve: It's Minrathous. If I took even half the bribes I've been offered, I could buy an estate in Hightown.
Thom: It takes a special kind of strength to resist that.
Thom: I got a letter from Sera the other day. Don’t ask me how she got it to the Lighthouse.
Harding: ‘Friends’, I bet. And hey - she dealt with the Fade for you! So what'd she say?
Thom: Well, there was a lot of calling Solas a shite-faced arseknuckle. And then she told me not to get killed, or she’d yank my beard ‘til my head came off.
Harding: Aw.
Lucanis: Rainier, I do not knife civilians. Everyone I have killed has been embedded in politics. Their hands are never clean.
Thom: And you're sure you’ve never made a mistake? Never got a passer-by or a child caught in all the blades and arrows? Never gone in without knowing everything, and got someone hurt?
Lucanis: Of course not. I’m a professional.
Thom: You’re a mercenary with a cape.
Thom: You could’ve left Dock Town. A mage. Talented. You could’ve gone anywhere, chased a better life.
Neve: If I left, I’d be abandoning people who never got that choice. I’m good where I’m at.
Thom: I hope you know how admirable that makes you.
Neve: Not that admirable. If I got that estate in Hightown? Too far to walk to Hal’s fish stand.
Thom: (laughs) Good priorities.
Davrin: So, Rainier. Heard a lot of rumours about how you joined the Wardens.
Thom: (uneasy noise) You know, Warden Blackwall told me your past gets forgotten after the Joining.
Davrin: A nice ideal, but it never stands up to the gossip. But you’ve shown your worth.
Thom: Enough for me to have one of those griffons when we rescue them, d’you reckon?
Davrin: (laughs) We’ll see.
Thom: I knew someone like Manfred once. He was a spirit, but he sort of… grew his own body.
Emmrich: Oh! A spontaneous incarnation! Do you happen to know what kind of spirit he was?
Thom: Uh… the kind that looks like a young man, but reads minds and flits about trying to make everyone feel better about themselves?
Emmrich: Ah, Compassion! A rather more advanced emotion than Curiosity, and therefore capable of manifesting a physical body, rather than needing to adopt a vacant one.
Thom: More advanced? Right. That explains why Cole used to talk to me about living with the weight of regret, and Manfred spent ten minutes yesterday poking my face to see if my beard came off.
Neve: So, you know Dorian?
Thom: Does anyone who’s been in the same room as him for thirty seconds get a choice about knowing Dorian?
Neve: And didn’t always get along, I take it.
Thom: He’s… he’s not so bad. We might’ve judged each other by first impressions back when we met.
Neve: And what’s your impression now?
Blackwall: Still too fancy for his own good. But it says exactly who he is that he’s fighting against slavers and blood mages. I think I got the better deal with the darkspawn.
Taash: I heard the Inquisitor turned into a dragon.
Thom: No, she… didn’t. But she did get one to fight with us once.
Taash: She did? What kind? How’d she do it?
Thom: Sort of… gold? And she drank from this pool of elven magic, and… that somehow let her ask it to help us. I think.
Taash: Did she ride it into battle?
Thom: Uh… No.
Taash: Oh. I would’ve ridden it into battle.
Thom: Emmrich, do you know what those demons were the other day? The ones that wouldn’t leave me alone?
Emmrich: Ah. Those were manifestations of Shame. A variant of the Despair spirit.
Thom: Right. Don’t know what I expected.
Emmrich: If it’s any consolation, I find that one can tell much more about a person from the more benign spirits that gather around them. I catch glimpses of them about you often. Valour. Fortitude. Honour.
Thom: I hope to be worthy of them.
Thom: Lucanis, have you ever regretted any of your kills?
Lucanis: Not so far.
Thom: So this is what you’re fine with being? A man who takes nobles’ money and lives in luxury with your bloodied hands? That's the life you chose?
Lucanis: Not ‘chose’, exactly. It is what I was trained to be since my childhood.
Thom: Wait. You were – who trains a child to be an assassin?
Lucanis: You met my grandmother.
Davrin: You held up pretty well in the last fight, Rainier. For an old man.
Thom: Whelp like you’d better watch what he says around a senior Warden.
Davrin: Why? You’ll tell me to do the fifty press-ups that your creaky bones can’t handle?
Thom (laughs) I’ll stop letting you borrow my best chisel.
Bellara: Hey, um, Thom? You know that little rocking griffon you made? Could you make, I don’t know, a bigger one? Like… adult… person-sized?
Thom: (chuckles) You never have a rocking griffon growing up?
Bellara: No! They’re not a Dalish thing! Because you can’t really rock. When the aravel’s moving, I mean. So… no, it’s a dumb idea. Forget I said anything.
Thom: You want me to make it a rocking halla?
Bellara: Yes please thank you.
Emmrich: How far you must have travelled, with both the Inquisition and the Wardens!
Thom: I like being on the road. Keeps a man honest.
Emmrich: I rather envy your fearlessness of the wider world. It’s so recent that the end of the Circles allowed me to travel freely outside the Necropolis.
Thom: Must have been freeing. Having the whole world suddenly open to you.
Emmrich: And rather overwhelming, I must admit. When I compare myself to you – a brave Warden, combatting the Blight across all of Thedas…
Thom: Trust me: compare the two of us, and that’s the only way I’ll come out better from it.
Thom: We fought quite a few dragons in the Inquisition. Almost got eaten once by some pissed-off beast in the Hinterlands. Kept throwing its dragonlings at us.
Taash: Fereldan Frostbacks are crappy mothers. First sign of trouble, and it’s ‘here! Take my children!’
Thom: (laughs) The worst was the lightning-spitter off the Storm Coast. Spent twenty minutes hacking away at its scales, rest of my team unconscious on the ground.
Taash: Wait - you what? That's not how you fight dragons. You can't just stand there and hit them. That's stupid. And boring.
Lucanis: It’s how the Crow Houses work. Children of the House lineage are trained from our infancy.
Thom: Andraste’s fucking tits.
Lucanis: It’s necessary. If Illario and I had been coddled… Caterina pushed us hard and young, because she wanted us to survive.
Thom: I don’t… (sighs) The things people do to children.
Harding: I never thought to ask - how come Varric changed your nickname?
Thom: I asked him to go with something else. 'Hero'... that was a name he gave to Blackwall.
Harding: Well, he chose the right name. You know, 'cause Rooks move in straight lines. And you charge right in there, don't mess around with fancy words, just hit things til they drop. You could say you're -
Thom: Don't do it, Lace.
Harding: Straightforward.
Thom: (chuckles) You're as bad as Sera.
Emmrich: Master Rainier, I wanted to say – I hope you know that you’re the only person here who looks at you with any harshness.
Thom: I – (sighs) You don’t know everything about me.
Emmrich: I would never claim to. But I know that you place yourself before your allies and the defenceless without hesitation and with utter selflessness. I know you understand your Warden oath better than many of your superiors. I know that you are a good man.
Thom: … I wish I knew what it was like to be you. Seeing the good in everyone, living or dead.
Emmrich: Then I hope you’ll permit me continue to see the good in you – until you can see yourself as I do.
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salparadiselost · 11 hours ago
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A random idea that I'm not ever sure I'm going to pick up and finish. AU is that everyone lives in a movie genre and the universe if governed by the rules of that genre. Bruce, fed up with being a failed lover interest, starts to adopt kids from other genres.
-----
"I don't get it," Dick says, standing at the top small set of stairs and looking down them. There's like six of them, hardly enough to actually call it a staircase. Dick could probably jump the full way down without hurting himself. It's definitely not a flight, just six steps to get from the raised dias of the bank's entry to the street. But Bruce is still hesitating at the top, staring at them like they are a snake curled up in the grass. 
The man who had assigned himself Dick's father (He doesn't need a father. He doesn't have parents. His parents are dead. Killed. For eight years, their case has gone untouched as cold as their corpses. He needs to solve it. He needs to find the killer. He has to. He has to. He has to...) drags his eyes from the stairs to Dick.
"You live in a *rom com*," Dick practically spat the words. He had been growing to hate this saturated colour, plastic world. There were too many people. None of the streets were ever empty. Movements from the corners of his eyes that his brain screamed could be someone pulling a gun, someone reached for a knife, someone passing a drug off to another, was usually just a woman dressed in LuLulemon pulling her yappy dog along. It was maddening the way that his brain wasn't built for this. He saw people doing things and his mind screamed that it was clues! It was evidence! You need to investigate it! You need. You need. You need.
But he doesn't. Because he doesn't exist here. The Graysons don't exist here. No one has been killed in this city for over 100 years apparently. The worse crime in the paper had been when Miss Betty accidentally stole cupcakes because her and Joe's orders got mixed up. They were getting married now apparently.
Dick shook his head trying to dislodge the part of him that was screaming that he was missing a clue. He tried to focus on the present. Him. Bruce. Stairs.
"This is a romantic comedy," he repeated. "It's all about love, so what's the fucking worse thing that could happen on the stairs."
"*It seems I've fallen for you*," said Bruce suddenly, his voice so devoid of emotion it startles Dick. Dick's eyes snap up to meet the other man's eyes, but Bruce is still looking at the stairs.
"That's the part of the script," he continues, his voice blank. It's disconcerting. Dick has only heard him peppy or bubbly or other words that paint him as a happy-go-lucky dog. He's never heard... this. "I fall down the stairs and I... I break something. I lay there until she's suppose to rush in. She's supposed to be a nurse or a doctor or maybe just someone with first aid training. She's supposed to treat me until the ambulance comes and I'm supposed to say *'it seems I've fallen for you'*"
Bruce finally looks at Dick and he can't even describe what's in the man's eyes. It's... he would almost call it haunted. The same glint that he has when he stares in the mirror.
"I've broken my leg from falling down stairs 48 times. I've broken one of my ankles 53 times. My left arm 18 and my right 26. Three times it's been my collarbone. One time after two flights, it was my back. I was paralyzed from the neck down. I couldn’t move a damn finger, so I just laid there in pain until the clock hit midnight and everything reset. And that’s just the staircase falls. There’s also the open manholes, the broken railings, getting hit by a car, a couple of times where a bridge gave out from under me. Any of them will do as long as I end up hurt and on the ground."
Dick stared. Coldness washed through his veins, fixing him to the spot. For the first time since he got here, fear settled into the pit of his stomach. The only thing he could think to say was: "I thought that nothing went wrong here?"
Bruce gave a harsh laugh that seemed more fitting for Dick's genre. "Everything works out if you actually have someone who wants to love you. If your love interest isn't interested or she just doesn't bother to turn up... well, the universe keeps trying to correct itself even if that means you have to lay in a crumpled, bloody heap at the bottom of stairs for a few hours."
He... he didn't know what to say. Say that he was sorry? That Bruce didn't have anyone coming to love him?
He looked back at the stairs and saw them how Bruce saw them. He tried to figure out what to say, but Bruce just turned on his heel.
"Let's go find the wheelchair ramp."
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worldly-fluster · 2 days ago
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Snapdragon
Dragon!Sylus x Non-MC! Reader
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Part 1 of ?
*This will be Non-Canon BTW it starts with Dragon!Sylus and goes into normal Sylus*
Warnings: Blood, cussing...I think that's it lol
**non-mc but will be called MC because it's easier to write than (y/n) every time 👍**
-The Start of Something Normal-
-1st person POV- changes throughout**
Have you ever wondered if there was something...more?
Something other than going to a 9-5 and paying rent with all you earned, there must be something else.
At least I had my games right?
-
Today is weird.
Just weird.
Ever since I woke up from a weird dream, that I can't even remember, I've been randomly smelling flowers.
Checked the LADS game, flowers.
Got ready for work, flowers.
Delt with customers, flowers.
But I'm the only one smelling it?
Maybe it's the stress, I'll just have to take melatonin when I get home.
-
As I walked through the front door of my apartment, coming home after a long day at work, I was greeted by dark silence. I hate living alone...
I sighed as I placed my keys on the shelves by my door and threw my heavy jacket on top of them. I limped slightly into my living room/kitchen, my feet hurting from standing all day. When I reached the couch, my nose was assaulted by the smell of flowers once again causing me to groan.
"What the fuck... Bruh." I plopped down on the cheap leather futon with a weeze, reaching for the bottle of melatonin gummies I threw on there the other night.
Popping two into in my mouth, I grabbed the iPad next to the bottle and opened up the Love and Deepspace app.
I smiled when I saw Sylus show up immediately on the screen, my heart doing a badump as I sang quietly along to the intro.
Finally getting onto the game, I went to the daily login that I forgot to get this morning, ignoring Zayne standing there in his Panda onesie.
After completing the normal, I didn't know what to do, so I went to check the memories. Only then did I remember I never actually watched the new Dragon Sylus cards...
From what I heard about them it seemed traumatizing. But I guess if I had nothing else to do?...I'm gonna regret it aren't I.
The smell of flowers hit my nose again, even stronger than before, when I tapped the first one I saw called 'Abyssal Blossom'.
As the memory loads, the iPad glitches and shuts off. Maybe I forgot to charge it and it died? The smell of flowers is almost overwhelming, as if I'm standing in a field full of them.
I started feeling tired, so tired that I could hardly stand up so I decided to just sleep for a while on the futon. I fell asleep quickly.
-
This dream?...felt familiar...and too real.
The scent of the flowers made more sense here, the field looking familiar...oh its almost exactly like the flower field you can see in one of Sylus' Dragon cards.
What was the name of it again? Abyssal something...
Oh whatever, these flowers are nice. The scent kinda comforts me, almost like a mix of vanilla citrus? With a slight hint of herbal lavender I think... I don't know I'm bad with identifying stuff.
This dream is quite detailed though, the flowers, the dirt, the nice cool breeze and warm rays of sun on my skin...wait, what's that? Looks like something flying in the sky? A big bird maybe...it's coming closer? Oh shit, what the fuck-?!
The air was knocked out of my lungs as I was picked up and yoinked through the air.
"Are you here to try to kill me?"
I blinked up at the...man? Are we flying??
"No?"
I wheezed out my answer, it sounding more like a question in my shock as I clung onto him. The man? narrowed his eyes at me.
Are those red eyes? And horns? Why does he look like Sylus?? Wait, Dragon Sylus???
He seemed to search my face for something, his own relaxing a bit as he found what he was looking for.
"Then why are you in my territory?"
"I don't know, I just woke up here..."
"Woke up here? Who, in their right mind, would come into my territory for any reason?"
"I don't know...I just remember falling asleep at home and waking up in this field. It's beautiful by the way."
"Hm..."
"What should I call you? I'm MC."
"...Stayrus*" (Something that sounds similar lol)
"...How about Sylus?"
"Do what you want. It'll be up to me whether I answer or not."
"So...where are you taking me?"
"To my home, where I will be keeping an eye on you."
"Oh okay."
"Don't get any ideas human. I'm bored and I have been waiting for something interesting."
"I mean, I figured. No one just goes out and picks up a random stranger without being a little bored."
He grunts as he continues flying through the sky.
He brought me to a cave opening at the top of a deep canyon, he sat me down and lightly pushed me inside.
"You will be staying here until I say so."
"Alrighty. Any rules?"
"No...you are oddly okay with this."
"Well," I shrug, "it's either this or fend for myself in an unfamiliar place outside."
-
"Sylus?"
"..."
"Um...Stayraytus??"
"That was terrible."
"Sorry..."
"..." He sighs, "What is it?"
"So...I have zero survival skills...can you teach me how to survive here? Please?"
"...child."
"Yes...sorry."
-
It's been about a week since Sylus, yes he started answering to it, let me stay in his 'home'. He started teaching me some survival things, like how to find food, telling me to ask him first if the thing is edible. Other than that, it was...boring.
In my boredom, while Sylus lay on the cool cave floor surrounded by gold, I started stretching.
Touching my toes, bending to the side, balancing on one foot like a flamingo...you name it, I was trying to do it.
I was in the downward dog position when Sylus spoke.
"What are you doing?"
"...yoga?"
"...yugo."
"Pffft-" I couldn't help but laugh a bit, "it's Yo-gah."
"...why are you doing whatever that's called?"
"It's so my body doesn't get stiff."
"...how old are you?"
"23."
"..."
"...Don't you dare say it."
Sylus grunted as he went back to messing with his golden lamp thing.
After a bit of silence he spoke.
"I'm 27."
I looked up at him in a little surprise.
"Really? You look my age honestly."
"hm."
-
We were sitting by the entrance of the cave, watching the sunset, when Sylus broke the silence.
"Your hair..."
"What's wrong with my hair? Is there knots? I swear I got them all out earlier..."
"No, it's just different."
"What do you mean?"
"everyone I've ever seen had lighter hair...yours is darker. It's...pretty."
My face felt hot as I turned away from him.
"Oh, thank you...no one's said that about me before."
"Why not?"
I shrug.
"I'm sure that you get called pretty, beautiful, every time someone sees you, I mean, you're pretty attractive...I'm going to shut up now..."
There was a bit of silence until he spoke, looking over my face.
"No one has ever called me any of those things before..."
"Oh...well I still think you are. Those people are just blind."
"...Thank you."
I smile at him.
"Any time."
A comfortable silence settled over us but I couldn't take my eyes off of him if I tried. His hair looked so soft and fluffy...
"Hey Sylus?"
"Hm?"
"Can I...touch your hair?"
He looked questioningly at me, one of his brows raised.
"Why?"
"It looks so soft, but you don't need to say yes. I was just curious."
Sylus looked to the side, seeming to think for a moment before he looked down with a small smile, giving a small nod before he lay stretched out and placed his head on my lap, careful of his horns.
I let out an excited hum as I carefully ran my fingers through his hair, my nails slightly scratching his scalp. He grunted, not really used to this type of contact but...he thinks he can get used to this.
Sylus closed his eyes as he felt your hands work their way through his hair, around the base of his horns gently and lightly rubbing behind them in the hard to reach places. His chest felt warm, his heart fluttering as all he could think about were your hands, the warmth of your thighs...
He could definitely get used to this.
-
It seemed winter was fast approaching as the cave seemed to get colder, frost covering the edges of the entrance. I sat snuggled into Sylus' side.
"...What are you doing?"
"It's cold, it's called cuddling for warmth."
"... do as you wish."
His tail gently curled around us, pushing me just a bit closer.
"...it is getting colder out. We'll have to get you something warmer."
"Ah, don't worry about it. You're warm enough so I'll just have to stay right here."
Sylus grunted, his tail wrapping just a bit tighter. Just enough for me to notice.
-
The next day, Sylus was gone for a little while. I had to stay warm by my own makeshift fire, the dry sticks that were just by the edge of the cave entrance being my fuel.
While I waited for Sylus to get back I watched as the smoke went up through a small hole in the ceiling of the cave, wondering, how long have I been here? Where he could have gone? ...how much longer will I be allowed to stay?
After just a few more minutes, I heard the sound of his powerful wings as he landed at the entrance. He was holding a big bundle of... something.
He walked over to me and just, dumped what he was holding onto my head.
"Mph?!"
"This should work."
His tail moved the pile of burning sticks to the side before I could accidentally fall onto it with his gift still suffocating me.
Seeing me still struggling with it, he chuckled and plucked one blanket off my head letting me poke my head out of the pile.
"Guh! Why you do this?"
"English Sweetie."
"What is this?"
"Blankets, for warmth."
"...Thank you Sylus."
"Hm. Now scooch over, I'm cold."
"You're literally a walking furnace?"
"... I'm cold."
"Just say you wanna cuddle."
"...cuddle me."
-
As winter gave way to spring, the flowers started blooming again. The change in temperature seemed to make Sylus stir crazy.
I let out a squeal as his thick tail wrapped around my waist and pulled me along.
"Sylus! No!"
"Sylus yes."
"No!"
"Do you want to see the flowers or not?"
"...fine. But if you drop me, I will haunt you."
-
After a short flight, Sylus landed at the field of flowers he found me in. I looked around, having not had the chance to fully look around before being whisked away, when I saw something that made me gasp.
"Oh! Look, there are Snapdragon's!"
I moved towards them, Sylus staying close to my side.
"What? There aren't any other dragons here."
"No not actual dragons, Sy, they're a type of flower."
I move so he could see it better.
"This is a snapdragon!"
"That looks nothing like a dragon."
"It kinda does, see? This is it's eyes, nose, horns, and this!"
I push the sides of the flower together, making a small opening into the flower.
"Is it's mouth! Cool right?"
"... dragons don't open their mouth just because you touch their cheeks."
"These ones do. Try it! It's fun."
"Fine."
I watched as he moved his claws around the flower, actively trying not to damage it, but failing.
"Sylus you have to be gentle." I giggle as he accidentally crushes the flower between his claws.
"Here, use the pads of your fingers instead."
I hold his hands as I help him gently open the Snapdragon's mouth. His breath seemed to stutter as he let me guide his hands.
"There, you did it!"
"Hmm..."
In a small burst of confidence, I giggle and lift my hands to his face where I gently press on his cheeks.
"Good job!"
His eyes widen slightly and out of reflex, or shock, his mouth slightly opens.
"You know, you're my big Snapdragon."
-
After we made our way back to the cave, I had a thought.
"What if I end up going back some day?"
"Back where?"
"My home, like how I woke up here, will I one day wake up back home?"
Sylus seemed to stiffen a bit as he looked towards me, eyes searching my face.
"...do you want to go back home."
"I don't know, some days I miss home but most days I forget."
"I understand...what if you never go back?"
"Then I hope you'll let me stay?"
"I'll be here."
There is a long comfortable silence as we watch the sunset from the mouth of the cave once again. I took in a big breath of the freshest air I'll ever have and enjoy the moment.
"Sylus? Can you promise me something?"
"What is it?"
"If I do end up leaving somehow, I want you to find things that make you happy, not just surviving but living."
His tail flicks a bit behind us.
"...fine, as long as you promise the same."
-
A few days later we were at the flower field once again.
The sun set and we continued to sit amongst the flowers after a long day of lazing around. The stars slowly came out one by one.
While I watched the stars it reminded me of a song that gets stuck in my head.
"You and I stargazing...intertwining souls..."
I quietly sang, trying not to disturb the quiet night.
While I looked at the stars and the moon that hung beautifully, Sylus looked my way with a slightly raised brow, curious.
"What's that?
He whispered his question, his rough voice surprisingly soft.
I gave a small hum, still looking at the night sky.
"it's a song from my home... sitting here under the stars reminded me of it."
"Hm..."
"You know...the moon is very beautiful tonight."
"...yeah, it is."
He couldn't seem to look away from you, watching the moon and stars that reflected in your eyes.
-
I heard birds chirping as I slowly woke up from a comfortable sleep, feeling warm. I could smell flowers still. I tried to turn but a weight on my side stopped me.
I heard a deep grunt as the weight tightened around me and pulled me closer. A second weight being added onto my legs, seeming to curl around and in between them.
I groggily opened my eyes to be met with a familiar shiny red jewel, just barely grazing my nose. I moved my hands up from their place by my stomach up to the jewel. I leaned my face into the jewel and snuggled closer.
I could feel a soft rumbling coming from the dragon I was cuddled to, having realized it was him from the warmth he gave me.
"It seems we fell asleep..."
His voice was deep from sleep, his clawed hands pulling me closer. The scent of flowers being drowned out by his smell. Scent like a bonfire and leather.
"We're still in the field?"
"Yeah...I didn't want to wake you."
I felt his warm breath on the top of my head, taking in my own scent.
He...he's definitely used to this. He never wants to let you go. You gave him a warmth he thought he would never receive, showed him care and treated him not as the monster everyone screams he is. With you, he's not a Fiend. He's Sylus, your Snapdragon.
-**
It was only a few moments...
That's all it took.
One second, you both were walking through the field towards home when there was a sharp sound. Sylus reacted almost immediately, dodging the claymore that sliced into the dirt where he was just seconds ago.
He barely let out a breathe before the assailant attacked again. He dodged once more before he heard.
"Sylus! Help!"
His head snapped towards the direction of your voice. What he saw made his blood boil. You were being pinned to the ground by a big burly, ugly, man.
"I got you!"
In his moment of distraction, the one attacking him hit him with something like magic. Golden chains wrapped around him, pinning him down. He heard a laugh as a woman walked into his sight, she was a sorceress and she had an overconfident smirk on her face.
"Time to face your fate, Fiend!" She laughed out, "honestly, I thought you were stronger than that. How disappointing."
"Fate?! What fate?!"
Sylus heard you struggling, making him start to struggle as well so he can get you out of here.
"Now now," the sorceress tutted towards him, then turned towards you, "His fate is to die by my claymore. Simple."
"That's his fate?! Bullshit!"
"You can't change fate-"
"Like fuck I will!"
You cut her off, just as you knocked the large man off of you with a quick kick to the groin. When you were free you threw yourself between her and Sylus.
"Just watch me."
You smirked as you watched her eyes widen and she took a step back.
"MC! No!"
Sylus struggled with the golden chains of magic holding him down.
"Don't worry Snapdragon...I got this."
"Stop! This is not-"
"Too late, already did."
-**
I grunt as the claymore goes through my chest, I can feel the intense pain for only a moment before it seems to disappear. The claymore is lodged in my chest, a ringing going through my ears. Sylus' eyes widen as it feels all the air is taken from his lungs when he sees the end of the claymore exit your back.
"MC!"
"Hahaha! Now what are you going to do Fiend?!"
"I'm going to fucking kill you!"
I heard a growl and the sound of something breaking but my mind goes a little fuzzy as a fight rages on, roars of anger and grunts reach my ears along with the sounds of a blade and claws. I could faintly hear the sound of tearing flesh.
All I could do was stare at the claymore still embedded in my chest, my hands too shaky and weak to pull it.
For a moment I thought the last things I would hear was the fight until-
"MC-"
Sylus slides over to me, his bloodied claws gently holding me. His wounds are already healing over as his panicked eyes look me over.
"MC, she's gone, you don't have to worry now. I got you."
"Sy..."
"Shit..." His voice grew hoarse, his eyes and hands shaking slightly as he tried to figure out a way to help. He seemed to find an idea as his brow set in determination.
"We need to resonate, my healing could help you but we need to resonate, now."
I nod slightly and he grabs my hand gently with one of his as his other gently tries to remove the claymore. I could feel his claws shake a little as he closed his eyes but I didn't want to close my eyes yet. I didn't want it to be the last time I did, so I watched as his power and a power I didn't know I had, connected. When I concentrate I can feel his anger, his fear, and something else I couldn't place. I watched as the claymore fell out of sight, his now free hand coming up to cup my face.
He leaned closer, our foreheads lightly touching.
I could almost feel my flesh mend, but the pain was numb to me as I kept my eyes on his face. I saw his brows furrow, his lips thin in what looks like pain-our shared pain, his eyes stayed closed in concentration.
After a moment more, I felt complete. I let out a sigh as the resonation slowly disappeared, my eyes fluttering closed a moment before I fixed them onto him. I watched as his eyes slowly opened, his nose grazing mine as his eyes locked on mine.
"You aren't going anywhere. Not without me. We live together and we die together. Only you can kill me, and I you."
There is a slight glow to his eyes and the gem in his chest as he stares into my eyes, into my soul.
"Sylus-"
"You're stuck with me. Who else will teach me about your home?"
I shake my head with a giggle.
"What would I do without my Snapdragon?"
"Hm..."
"I'd probably die."
He glared at me for even joking about it, his hand gripping mine a little harder. The hand on my cheek pressed against me, forcing my forehead to press onto his a little more.
"Even if I wasn't here, I would do everything to make sure you stay by me."
"That doesn't even make sense." I laugh.
"You know what I mean." He smiles as you bring a hand to his face, rubbing your thumb of his cheek to get some dirt off. He leaned into your touch, his eyes full of warmth as he continued to stare into your eyes.
After a moment I pull away and stand, Sylus standing as well. I look around at the now destroyed field, a pang of sadness hits my heart...
As both of us take in the aftermath, an oddly familiar scent hits my nose...when suddenly my body starts to glow slightly.
"Wait, Sylus what's happening?"
"I don't know, come here."
This feeling I get from the soft glow feels familiar...my eyes widen when I realize, the smell...
"Sylus!"
"MC?!"
We reach out to each other but the moment his clawed hand touches my hand, a bright light shines and I'm gone.
-**
Nothing is left of her as the light completely disappates
"MC?!"
Sylus turns this way and that, wanting- needing to see just a glimpse of her. His tail whipping around wildly as he floats around in a panic, clawed hands reaching for something, anything.
"MC!...Where..."
Sylus stops for a moment, slowly landing on the cold ground beneath him before collapsing to his knees.
He throws his head back as he lets out the most broken yell that could be heard for miles.
He looked to the side when he ran out of breath, his chest heaving as he let out a whimper. He saw that claymore, laying coldly on the dirt. Your blood still covered it, your scent still on it...
A few tears fell from his eyes as he reached out and gripped the handle. He pulled it towards him, curling around it slightly on the ground.
He lay there for what felt like forever to him, in the very flower field he met you...the flowers mostly crushed by the ambush of the sorceress that was sent to kill him with this very claymore.
When he finally had the energy to move, he went back to your shared cave, claymore in hand. Seeing the entrance made his flight stutter, knowing you won't be there to welcome him home...
He landed at the opening, he stepped heavily inside.
He saw your pile of blankets, the small fire pit you built, the little trinkets you collected from his horde that he let you have...
He stabbed the claymore into his old sleeping place then made his way towards the small stream that runs through the edge of the cave. He used the water from the steam to clean the blood off of him, yours, his, that damned sorceress...
After he was cleaned and dried off with the cloth you used to use, he made his way to your pile of blankets.
Sylus collapsed into them, burying himself in your scent, a wine leaving his throat as he held tightly onto what was left of you.
The dragon is lost without his master...
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duskdog · 1 day ago
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I've been approaching the riddles with the thought that Eddie is actually answering Steph's questions. I've considered each one in response to the question directly preceding it. 1. "The gift that keeps on taking. The theft that keeps on giving" is in response to "What did he say about me?"
I generally agree with something of a combination of what's been proposed before. The gift that keeps on taking is traditionally the White Elephant, a gift that causes more trouble than it's worth, and I think it's likely -- given what we know of Arthur and how he reacts to failure/being beaten (he goes on angry rants!) -- that he may have reacted the same to Steph getting in his way. Here's his child, something that's supposed to bring him joy, and all she does is fuck him over.
(He may even be, vaguely, remembering a time when she did bring him joy, maybe when she was a new baby, and it just makes him all the more bitter now. I don't know if we can fairly say that he actually cared about her even then, but I'd like to think there was a time when he and Crystal lived a semi-normal life? I'm sure it was never a healthy relationship, but they got married -- clearly once upon a time they had feelings for each other, and hopes and dreams and stuff. Maybe Arthur was happy to hold his new baby. And now look at what a pain in the ass she is.)
Regardless, something that's supposed to be seen as a blessing has been nothing but a curse -- and I could definitely see Arthur going on more than one angry rant about it to Eddie. (Last we saw him and Eddie together, after all, they were getting thrown out of the house, and it doesn't take a genius to realize that the only reason Black Canary would know they were there, or care, would be because of Steph.)
2. The bug riddle is in response to "why do you believe he had to leave clues to his crimes?".
First I have to preface this by saying that this is a weird question for Steph to ask, because as was pointed out, Arthur hasn't been leaving clues for a long time by this point. Still, it may be something that bothered Steph a lot when she was younger, and maybe still bothers her? I'm one of those folks who believes Arthur was suffering from OCD (which is never outright stated, but I believe is implied when he talks about how he was "cured" of his need to leave clues -- at the very least, this makes me think that it was psychological in some fashion, and some flavor of OCD best fits the bill, so he may have begun taking some sort of medication?), which does have a genetic component, but we've never seen any indication that Steph would be worried about anything like that, or that the thought has even ever crossed her mind, so I don't think that's a factor.
So why does it matter? I think it's just that Steph is just trying to understand her father. She's just recently found out that he's dead, and now she has all these unresolved questions, and unresolved feelings, and him leaving clues was a core part of his original costumed persona. He never changed his name from Cluemaster, either, even after he stopped leaving clues. I think the question is still important to Steph, because the clue thing had been a big part of who Arthur was, and "who Arthur was" is exactly what she's trying to resolve right now.
I think, with this riddle, Eddie may have cut straight to the heart of the matter that I just discussed -- this seemingly no-longer-relevant question that's still clearly very important to Steph even so. Digging up Arthur's metaphorical bones here makes her the bug... but which bug? Is she going to let these questions, these feelings, trap her in someone else's web -- is she going to get tangled up in the man Arthur was, in his mistakes, and let that devour her? Or is she going to cocoon in her own web instead, nurturing herself through this in a more healthy manner, and emerge better for it?
3. "Dog in a manger" is in response to "Did he ever talk about someone who hurt me? Someone named Murray?"
This one is... complicated.
To understand, it's important to note that this saying has a long, long history, and variations of it have been used in several different contexts throughout that time. At its core, it's exactly as described above -- someone who selfishly hoards something it doesn't need/can't use so that others cannot have it. But there are a lot of different shades of that thought. In one of its earliest references, it was specifically used as a commentary on pederasty -- the practice of sexual activity between a grown man and a boy/youth. And there are multiple instances later on where it's used in a similar (if less pedophiliac) fashion to comment on May/December romances -- the idea is that, when an older lover takes a much younger one, they're "wasting" the younger lover's beauty and vigor, which they can no longer hope to match themselves.
Jim Murray, a grown man, lusted after Steph, who was only 11. I don't think Eddie is trying to play games with this one, or analyze anything. I think he's just straight-up (as straight-up as the Riddler can get) answering the question. He's saying "ah yes, that guy who did that", which clearly indicates that Arthur did mention Murray.
He may also be subtly casting judgment on that, since he chose a reference that generally condemns such a thing, but it's hard to say.
4. "What day has no man lived to see?" is in response to "Do you think he wanted to give up crime?"
The actual traditional answer to this riddle is "tomorrow". No man lives to see tomorrow, because when it arrives, it immediately becomes "today".
I think this one is just really simple, and really sad. He's saying that we'll never really know. Steph herself is struggling with the idea that any possibility of her father ever changing his ways is now gone. All potential destroyed in death.
What could have, and maybe would have, happened "tomorrow" is beyond any of them. Maybe Arthur did want to give up crime, or maybe he didn't -- it doesn't matter, because he didn't live to see that day.
I think that's the answer that's most likely. However, he also might be trying to say that Arthur did want to give it up, but just didn't live to see the day when he would, if you also interpret the next riddle a certain way...
5. "The tiger envies the oxen but only understands its horns" in response to "Did he want to stop?".
Going out on a limb with this one, but given the question I think he's answering: the oxen lives peacefully on the farm, working hard but without strife or worry. The tiger envies this peaceful life, but as a creature of violence, all it understands is violence.
Eddie may be saying that Arthur did want to stop... at least on some level. Maybe a part of him did want that more peaceful life, without all the stresses associated with the life they lead as criminals.
But he would probably never achieve that, because crime/violence is all he understands.
I think, however, it's far more likely that Eddie is just following up on the previous answer, and not implying anything about what Arthur actually did or did not want to do. It doesn't really matter what Arthur wanted -- it never had a chance to happen, and frankly, it probably wasn't ever going to anyway. Because Arthur really only understands one way to be.
6. "The number you can't count on your fingers" doesn't have an associated question at all, but it's directly in response to "One straight answer and I'll leave."
Eddie struggles here before giving his riddle, and the impression I get is that it's not just because Steph has gotten violent with him at this point. What I can't decide is why he would find it difficult to continue, when he's been rapid-firing riddle responses for the entire conversation. Maybe it is just because Steph's about to beat the shit out of him and he knows it, but... I don't know. It doesn't feel that way.
As for the riddle... it doesn't really have a good traditional answer. I've seen reference to it being "11" (which is mildly interesting because that's how old Steph was when Jim Murray tried to assault her), but that doesn't actually make any sense to me -- there are tons of numbers you can't count on your fingers, not just one (or, alternately, you can count even more than that if you think beyond just counting by ones).
I think @armed-with-a-waffle-iron is probably correct here -- Eddie thinks Steph is missing the point. What she's looking for is something that can't be quantified. There are no answers. The way I interpret the previous two riddles, this one would follow naturally: none of what Steph is asking about matters. She's not going to find what she's looking for here, at the very least.
The part that throws me for a loop, actually, is the Riddler's words after Steph leaves. Steph having a question mark over her head is a pretty obvious thing to say, but why is he speculating about Arthur's "game"? It seems to imply that he thinks/knows that Arthur is alive... but even if that were true, why would he assume the man's grief-stricken daughter was part of any sort of plan?
I don't think they actually ever follow up on this, so I guess we'll never really know.
I'm gonna have a go at the riddles which The Riddler throws at Stephanie Brown in Robin (1993) #113. @a-bad-case-of-the-stephs I'm hoping you can help me out, haven't actually read Robin in well over a year.
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It's a gift that keeps on taking. It's a theft that keeps on giving. Having a child is the "gift" and when Arthur was imprisoned or estranged, his child was "stolen" from him. When Stephanie came into Arthur's life, he saw her as a "white elephant", but when he no longer had her, he became driven by the idea of her.
One bug is wrapped in a web, therein to die. Another bug is wrapped in its own web, there to be reborn. In a sense, being tangled in a web can be fatal but it can also indicate introspection and growth. Arthur's obsession with leaving clues were often his undoing so will Stephanie preoccupation with her father be her's or will it actually represent reflection and change?
There is a dog in the manger, but it cannot subsist on hay. A manger is a feeder for livestock, typically holding hay; which dogs do not eat. A "dog in a manger" is a person who spitefully refuses to let someone else benefit from (or let go of) something for which he or she has no personal use (dictionary.com). But dogs cannot subsist on hay and the livestock cannot eat with the dog in the manger. If the dog doesn't relent or change, then everyone loses. Stephanie is the dog and her memory of her father is the manger she cannot let go of.
What day of the week has no man ever lived to see? Judgement day. You have to be dead to see it. And they're both very much alive.
The Tiger envies the Oxen but only understands its horns. The Tiger envies the Oxen's power but it only understands power through the language of violence. Steph easily outmatches The Riddler in a fight yet is confused how he still holds all the cards although she attacks him because she only speaks the language of violence.
I am the number you cannot count on your fingers. Edit: he’s saying Steph’s missing the point; you can’t count him on your fingers, he’s not that kind of number.
Would love some input.
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eggmeralda · 1 year ago
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I may have lost all hope
#it's a weird feeling?#like since late 2022 it's been kind of like. bad vibes consistently#and i tried to stay somewhat positive throughout it#but idk there's this very distinct feeling now of like. i can't describe it but it's completely gone#like I've actually got nothing to live for#nothing I've done or wanted to do since i was 14 has ever really like amounted to anything#all the friends i made i never feel like i can talk to#once again in that state of 'only alive so my family don't get sad'#like even when i wanted to just stop existing when i was 21 there was this tiny bit of hope still there a little bit#like i remember for that whole summer i kept getting quick thoughts about suicide but I'd always push them out of my mind instantly#but there was one day where i let the thought stay in my mind for a little bit and like properly considered how i would do it#and then after a bit i was like FUCK and then went and walked like an hour away from my house to try and forget it#and then after that day i slowly got better. and it was annoying bc it meant now i had to walk a whole hour back to my house#but even if those 2 months there was still this feeling of this isn't gonna last#bc i knew i was back at uni in a few months and at least i had music to listen to#and all the other times I've been in that state there was still this sort of feeling that it'll get better bc I've got things to get me#through it#but it doesn't feel like that now. like no job no friends no hyperfixation and now i can't even enjoy any music#anything i create is pointless bc only i care about it#all my friends are busy doing other stuff I'm like not even second best I'm the most forgettable person anyone might know#the only thing that would fix me is getting a random train to like some place I've never been#just to see a new thing i guess#but anyway#ramble#suicide mention
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paperbackfable · 6 months ago
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Erend: they don't Id me at the liquor store anymore because they see the light has left my eyes
-
Erend: We're playing Scrabble. It's a nightmare.
Alva: Scrabble? Scrabble's great.
Erend: Not when you're playing with Zo, it's not. They put words like "ephemeral" and I put "dog".
-
Varl: You're ignoring all your problems.
Aloy: I know.
Varl: You also know it's an unhealthy coping mechanism?
Aloy: I'm ignoring that fact as well.
Varl:
-
Zo: In your opinion, what's the height of stupidity?
Aloy: turning to Sylens How tall are you?
-
Aloy: You lying, cheating, piece of shit!
Sylens: Oh yeah? You're the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD.
Aloy: I'm leaving you, and I'm TAKING BETA WITH ME!
Varl, picking up the strike board: I think we're gonna stop playing now.
-
Aloy: Want do you want to be for "Halloween"?
Beta: Loved.
Aloy: Don't do this.
-
Sylens: I will not stand to be disrespected like this!
Aloy: Then sit.
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Alva: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the things you lost throughout your life...
Zo: It would be nice to have my sense of purpose back.
Aloy: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this.
Beta: My will to live! I haven't seen this in years.
Erend: I knew I lost that potential somewhere.
Varl: Mental stability, my old friend!
Alva: Ancestors, could you guys lighten up a little?
-
Varl: What do you think Kotallo will do for a distraction?
Aloy: Probably, like, whistle or throw a rock. That's what I would do.
Building explodes and several car alarms go off
Aloy: ...or they could do that.
-
OK THAT'S ENOUGH I SHOULD PROABLY STOP NOW BYE
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skeletalheartattack · 6 months ago
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...am I just losing my mind or did yer icon become evil? I don't remember that BeAst behind Boe
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yuuuump always been behind me
#ask#anon#pazuzu's just been there since the beginning#mainly because my avatar use to be of 2D in front of the d-sides album cover. or atleast one of the covers#and i had a lot of transparent edits of 2D over that cover#but when i had Boe made. i put him over it instead and i just kinda kept it like that cause i thought the colours together were really nice#as for the blurry swirls. i just like doing simple effects in paintdotnet#i don't really imagine them as much besides the blurriness of the minds eye. like this is how you'd see the inside of my brain maybe.#or not really my brain. boes minds eye maybe.#i don't know if i have a ''lore explanation'' for pazuzu in Boe's life in limbo/hell#or specifically in relation to Boe i mean#i'd still like to actually visualize what limbo looks like. or specifically the area in limbo in which Boe lives#which is just an old manor in the middle of nowhere. with old computer crts and keyboards in the mud of his back yard#dark purplish skies with maybe blueish roaming fields with no horizon#i do have a map file of me trying to create what i imagine to be Boes house but i've only blocked out his porch#i've got a loose idea of what the layout of his house's interior is like but nothing solid honestly#the reason he lives in an old manor is due to mystery case files: ravenhearst. inspiration-wise#use to play that growing up from bigfishgames. fucking love the look of that manor and the intense mess that resides within#i think i also think about the Gorillaz' o green world phase where they had kong studio's absolutely trashed with junk and shit#did actually buy MCF Ravenhearst the other day actually. specifically for higher res ref images of rooms#played a little of it the other day but i was so tired for most of that day so i didnt play for long#anyway. thank you for the ask anon :) yeah he's always been there. pazuzu kinda just blends into the background i think
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btsbs · 3 months ago
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tittyinfinity · 2 months ago
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It's really nice having a free housekeeping service thru my Medicaid but ever since my regular housekeeper that I had for a year (now friend) got promoted in March it's like every other person I've had fuckin hates disabled people
#there was one perso who would drive by my house to clock in (your location has to show that you're at the client's house) and leave#found out when i called and was like hey why has no one been showing up and the office was like it shows shes been clocking in there what??#apparently i wasn't the only one and she got fired#and then we had a woman who treated my shift like it was her break time#i mean she would sit at our table and eat a full meal and talk on the phone as loud as possible instead of cleaning#she'd clean for 20 minutes usually just dishes then spend the rest of the time eating or playing on her phone or on a phone call#she would put away WET TOWELS i mean they were more than just 'damp'#and once left a full unflushed shit in our toilet with shit stains on the toilet seat#i remember once she sat outside in our front yard on a phone call and when i went out there to ask what was going on#she was just like ''im on the phone'' and ignored me#i asked for her not to come back several times and they sent her 2 or 3 more times#and then i got a new lady who just straight up lies to my face#i give her a list of what i need done for the day and she will only do the dishes#then sit at our table and be like ''oh i got everything else done I'm just waiting on laundry''#and then I'd look to see that actually nothing else was done at all counters dirty floors dirty LAUNDRY NOT DONE#i confronted her last time#i was like ''hey I've asked for the bathroom to get done the past few times now and it hasn't been''#and she was like ''yes I did clean it'' so i wiped my hand across the sink and showed her the dust and grime stuck to my fingers#and then didn't clean it again that day. and said sat at the table saying she was waiting on laundry. and no laundry was done#and said she swept the living room which absolutely was not swept#bc I'd get out the vacuum and she'd be like ''oh i can just use the broom'' (on the carpet??)#I'd get the bathroom cleaning supplies out and she'd just put them away#and i dont mean that im being super picky about wanting things cleaned prefectly#or thaf she's ''not doing it right''#she's literally not doing it at all#i told my friend/ex housekeeper about this and she told me that every other person who's had her also asked for her not to come back#oop she's here. it's gonna be her last time i called the office and set it in stone this morning that she wont be coming back#.bdo
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howlsmovinglibrary · 9 months ago
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It is truly so funny to work myself out of depression in a 2.5 year upwards crawl, reach a point where I actually like and value myself and think I may, in fact, be a treasure-
only for the academic job market to turn to me, lovingly take my face in its hands, and say "...then perish."
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quaranmine · 8 months ago
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i hate being an adult i hate money i hate bills i hate healthcare and health insurance
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varjopeura · 3 months ago
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#oh hey i just caught myself harboring Unnecessary Nightmare Scenarios#that last post made me think about how the only thing stopping me from getting another dog is money#like i could afford having a friend for savu. it would be no problem#BUT in a situation where i lost my partner and had to provide for the dogs by myself and they'd both get sick i'd be in deep trouble#which has sounded like a completely rational thing to be aware of. a completely valid reason for not getting another dog#except that is quite a few things that need to go wrong before the deep trouble would actually hit#and is that really the way i want to live my life? waiting for this relationship to end? accepting that eventually i will be left alone?#that my current life is nothing but a brief respite from a continuous struggle with both finances and illness? a glitch that will soon pass#it actually doesn't sound valid at all when i write it out like this#i have a partner who brings another stable paycheck into this household. i have no reason to believe this would change anytime soon#i have a wonderful dog that would probably benefit from having a friend#shelties are not super prone to any major lifelong diseases or such so it's unlikely the new dog would need constant expensive treatments#i think this thought pattern got a hold of me when savu got sick last spring#it was scary and unpleasant and i still feel raw around the edges after experiencing all of it#(the dog is fine by the way! definitely better these days and i'm super happy we got the surgery. we have many good years ahead of us still#but like. i'd like if my brain accepted 'this summer was scary and i'm not sure if i'm ready to possibly experience it with another dog'#instead of feeding me lies about a future where i'm all alone and desperately poor#but hey i've never caught this one before! now i know this thought pattern exists and can do something about it#sussitalk
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seaofreverie · 3 months ago
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Anyway how is everyone doing
#had to get up at 6 in the morning and therefore had 4 hours of sleep today (a weekly occurence pretty much)#so i just took a nap which took all evening and i'm still tired yayyyyy. because naps only work how they should about 10% of the time#and also i did nothing else today because sleep and now i'm truly wondering what to do with myself anymore#meanwhile i have to get up and go to school again tomorrow 😑 and the day after that 😑 and the day after that 😑#or i could drop out again and have nothing else to do anyway and continue rotting in my room#(whether it's my dorm room or my actual room doesn't matter). what's the pointtttttt#might be reaching some kind of limit or maybe i'm truly just dramatising and should just chill about it all#save me 4 hours of music listening now probably. idk man#got my minimal amount of social interaction today in the form of riding the elevator with 3 of the ppl from my course#when i could have (and normally would have) just taken the stairs instead#i feel like i made a big important step today that will help me later on through this year (no not really)#at least one thing i've noticed recently is that i might have the reverse of what is i guess is usually called seasonal depression#in the sense that now that it's chilly and cloudy and it gets dark earlier i feel like i'm finally LIVING in a way#the good effect of that will probably pass after a week or two though#but also just a bit over a month left now until my birthday and then my long awaited trip!!#anyone else get unreasonably excited for their birthday each year even though there's never anything special about it in the end#and that only makes the day more depressing lol#ok whatever i'm done whining now i think. music time then#celebrating (a bit late) one year of gratsax and lil beethoven today. some of the albums of all time for me personally#goosepost
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