#life is so short it makes me sad | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

coronangelic1 · 9 months ago

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i might be stressing about my future but at least im listening to bangers while we are at it

#el instante pasó by caramelos de cianuro makes me cry sometimes #life is so short it makes me sad #wwwgghaaa i should be studying #i cant believe its now march #do you believe it?#ITS INSANE!#coronangelic1 thoughts #studyblr

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doomedclockworkdotmp3 · 3 days ago

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his therapist woulda had a field day at their next appointment

#my art #doodle #fanart #resident evil 8 #ethan winters #i think its so funny that he has a journal in re8. not only does he have a journal but he illustrates it. i dont know if capcom intended to #imply that ethan stops every now and then to jot down the horrors and the hour that the horrors occur my guess is prolly not #but now its there and it makes me laugh. i shouldnt laugh at his mental health journey but i am anyways #shoutout to people who journal i wish i was you but instead i draw a guy feelin my emotions for me #but im so happy the sun goess away at 5pm. truly immaculate. i miss snow. but we stay chillin #i made more dear diary doodles but these were my favs n they went well together #i changed the entry in the 2nd one though cause i thought it was funnier to me this way #i cut my hair too short again im not even sad about it anymore like whatever man #at least its out of my way. and my shower was SO fast i got to stand there 5ever and it was still only like 15 minutes #fantastic. there are so many joys in life. theres twice as many horrors but the joys are definitely there and they are definitely joyful #anyways thats the post stay warm n cozy out there gang

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rosekasa · 24 days ago

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there is something so. intensely frustrating about feeling incapable of showing up for people the way that they want you to

#i wish people understood that it's so hard to be present in their lives and that closeness for me isnt about frequency of contact #but how open we feel during that contact #my brain is such a difficult place to live in it is so loud and so busy all the time #24 hours a day is a constant monologue and argument with myself for everything and it means that i just dont have the capacity to talk to #others most of the time #and like. i know this is so unreasonable. obviously we have to be present in the lives of people that care for us #but it just feels like every day i have to like. get on a stage and perform to every person in my life that cares about me so i can meet the #criteria of being a Good Friend or Good Girlfriend or Good Fan Artist or Good Mutual or Good Server Member #i feel like it is such a blessing to be seen by others as someone to expect things from #but as more people have started to love me it feels like i have to 'go out and perform' more and more and i am very exhausted #i wish i was someone that was easy to love and care for in the way that i am. and i dont mean that self deprecatingly it's just #i know im very hard to care about and love. because i disappear all the time and come back in a big flurry as soon as i get the energy back #and im just feeling it a Lot More lately because im starting to think this isnt going to be a short term thing i have to do before i start #feeling comfortable with a person #this is going to be my whole life #if i get married im going to have to 'go out and perform' and be a good wife and be affectionate and happy and not closed into my own brain #for days #if im going to make friends with colleagues I'll have to go out when they invite me and have to reply ro their texts and i cant just go #silent for weeks while i try to negotiate with my thoughts and then reappear once i make the slightest breakthrough #im very tired and sad. i want companionship but i feel like the kind of person i am is not fair for people who would be my companion #vent post #♡alizeh talks♡

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isa-ah · 4 months ago

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making a fursona is fun but getting to retire an old traumatized time capsule of yourself and make a new, happy, grown version of yourself is so fuckin nice.

#chocolate milk had very short hair and a very bad attitiude. very sad and angry guy #lovely belle is cheerful and bright with a cane and long hair like me =')!#growing my hair out and finding out its actually really wavey and curly was magical #and its so integral to my health getting soooooo so so so much better mentally and physically #bc for most of my life my hair was grey and kept very short and got insanely frizzy if it grew out #right up until our wedding i was buzzing my head consistently but after i realized what the root of my health issues was #my entire life changed!#my body type changed my my face shape changed my hair color changed i wasn't in 8-9 level pain every day anymore #lifes GOOD now i feel insanely healthy. id always assumed i was going yo die young and never know why #but instead im going into my 30s flourishing in a way ive never experienced in my life #AUGH making a new fursona was so needed and im so happy w the design #sorry to gush it's important to look around and recognize how far youve come! sometimes! so!

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tj-crochets · 8 months ago

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so in the past I have made themed gifts for people who have helped me* and it's been a little weird but like. Understandable to the person I am gifting the thing to weird? My current problem is that I want to make something for my endocrinologist because he has improved my quality of life hugely** but endocrinology doesn't have an easily themed gift and my endocrinologist reminds me very very strongly of like a sad greyhound or a whippet but I cannot explain to this very nice, very normal man that "hey I made you a plushie of a dog because I wanted to thank you for the steroids and you remind me of a dog. In a good way!" *like teeth plushies for the dentist who helped me figure out I have to have dental anesthetic without epinephrine in it, or a chicken plushie for the people at the chicken restaurant that went the extra mile to get their ingredients list that were the reason I figured out I'm allergic to coconut **I had what would have been a severe allergic reaction and it wasn't pleasant but I didn't end up in the hospital and I didn't take like a week minimum to recover and

#the person behind the yarn #I realize this is a problem of my own making #and that I very much do not need to make my endocrinologist anything #but it's such a HUGE difference in my life #he really does have like sad dog energy idk how to describe it #he wears very nice flannel shirts that I am slightly envious of because I'd never seen a blue and orange flannel before #and is like somehow even more obviously unthreatening than I am #like. I have PTSD. Had PTSD? Have? Not sure how to word that #I have worked through most of my major PTSD triggers but one thing that still gets me is people touching my neck #to the point where I have like flinched off the medical bed darted across the room kinda avoidance in previous medical appointments #I can mostly manage to sit still and let doctors touch my neck if I see it coming but I always flinch and I always hate it #and this guy is so incredibly unthreatening I didn't flinch at all and didn't even notice it was weird I didn't react negatively #until after I'd left his office #I am also (usually) seen as very unthreatening but mine is something I worked on deliberately for a while #(when I was working with toddlers) and also is made easier by the fact that I am very short and look younger than I am #idk how to describe how much this dude reminds me of a greyhound. WAIT NO he reminds me of a borzoi!#the wizard version of a greyhound

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maikry · 3 months ago

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🩸⛓️ Marius Damery ⛓️🩸

.

Original Character created by Mai.

Featured in original short story “Nightmare” written by Mai.

Also check us out on:

FICTIONPRESS: @maikrywrites

PINTEREST: @maikrywrites

ROYALROAD: @maikrywrites

INSTA: @mai.kry

TIKTOK: @mai.kry

WATTPAD: @maikrywrites

We’d love to have you! ✨

Check out our website for world lore and more! ✨💕

maikrywrites.wordpress.com

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highspeedinterconnect · 4 months ago

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this week has been fucking awful I just wanna lay down somewhere quiet w my gf and cats. holy shit

#1. my painful wisdom tooth was found to have gnarly intricate hook that’s already grown into my sinus cavity.#so. removal and recovery and cost are going to make me explode already #2. my cat the next day was diagnosed with an aggressive type of cancer after we found a mass under her tongue that can’t be removed.#and is not realistic in cost vs the fact it’ll probably keep returning since it’s an area that’s difficult to fully remove.#she’s having a harder time eating and it’s just reminding me of the same thing that happened to my extremely beloved childhood cat.#same thing happened to her until she was just bones and couldn’t stop drooling. it’s so painful to feel the life leaving something you love #3. our motherfucking upstairs neighbor’s god damn water heater broke and flooded all the apts under but we’re directly underneath.#bro I woke up to water pouring from our CEILING LIGHTS and cracks all over the ceiling. I had to physically smash the smoke alarm #ripped it from the ceiling since it’s ceiling socket was LEAKING but it shorted out and wouldn’t stop so I ripped the battery out #our carpet and shit is all torn up now with industrial fans and dehumidifiers. but it’s scaring my sick cat to not eating. it’s so sad #4. a towing place I forfeited my old ruined car to keeps sending notarized legal letters about it ending up In Situations.#despite the fact I signed it all completely over and it’s no longer my responsibility #there’s more but I’m tired of typing all this shit #coffee shop forgot to give me my donut and the coffee tasted bad too. that part isn’t any big deal at all lol it just made me start crying

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talkorsomething · 5 months ago

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I have Got to get more transgender

#100% секретный дневник левы НЕ ЧИТАЙ #transmasc #trans ftm #transgender #i like 2 say i'm very trans already but unforch i am Not Really. mostly boring ftm Guy Ever #so tempted to cut my hair again but my sense of what i look like is already so fuzzy i dont think it'd help..#want to dye my hair anyways. at this point i'd take whatever color i can get if not purple LOL #it's almost everything i could want and yet ... still me. still the same life. stuck.#soooo high functioning like you wouldnt believe EXCEPT istg i need an emotional support human who will guide me through tasks #such as 'pay with your Moneys Card at the Store'#or... idk that's it really. maybe go grocery shopping without feeling like i'm not meant to be there also #or like. exist in general maybe #reasons why not emotional support Animal: creature cannot understand capitalism. and also is not as necessary as a service dog specifically #idk! every time i come on here i fall apart (in text) and then pull myself back together for another day of ... this i guess.#i'm not even having like crying breakdowns or anything to go along with it i'm just held inside this shell of a body. typing away again #i'm soso tempted to make things worse. progress wouldn't matter anymore... at least maybe it would feel real that i'm like this #i wish my face fit on my body right. and also that i did not look quite so much like a vaguely gnc lesbian #like at LEAST let me look butch as hell but no. curse of sad hair & uncertainty #miss my little mullety thing from that brief period in october... miss my short hair from back in 2017 ...#just dont feel satisfied with what i am now. in general.#top surgery is literally Within my reach but i'm not sure about cost and i need to wait because of doing guard now......#my list of do i want t i kept for the past month turned out to be a bunch of maybes #partially cause i got sick. partially cause it stopped being shark week and i forgot about it #as always happens...#still unsure in my new(er) name. only heard it once #didn't feel the same way as with my old one? but idk. just don't know.#missing guard also but feeling conflicted about not having time for other hobbies...#since winter season is over i've had so much time to play guitar! that's insane! mostly cause i stopped playing for unrelated reasons...#just tired again. wonder if i need more sleep than what i always get. kind of restless.#there's nothing else to say i guess. just wish i could be a person the way everyone else seems to be.

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jacqcrisis · 5 months ago

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every time Fortnight by T. Swift comes on the radio, I get so goddamn annoyed she wrote a song about the very concepts and themes I personally enjoy so very very much and the song sucks.

Her singing is flat, the melody is mid, the best part is when her guest singer pops in to have some actually emotion in his performance, and she takes a whole song and about three dozen more words than necessary to convey a feeling other songwriters have been able to smack me in the face with in a stanza.

This should've been a slam dunk for me, but after several listens, the most emotion the song can pull from me is how very funny it would be if Swift killed that guy's wife.

#jacq writes #best songwriter of the decade my ass #i gave it so many tries #a song about only having someone for a short time and then being bitter about it all #as they are actively in your life #damn thats a whole damn premise i love to write and enjoy #shouldve been the easiest hole in one #finally a swift song that manages to make my brain go off the walls #but narp. its Okay. like every other song ive heard from her.#and then i put on fake out by FOB and hooooo doggy does that make me go nuts #all of fortnight vs 'my moodboard is just pictures of you but i swear im not sad anymore'#thats a great song about regret and longing

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the-casbah-way · 8 months ago

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not to beat a dead horse but jesus christ can you just leave people alone in public bathrooms i just want to fucking piss girl i'm so tired of feeling anxious and trying to avoid using public bathrooms because of how fucking weird cis people are about it. i tried to go into the bathroom at work today (i have worked here for years) and this woman who has worked here for two weeks and doesn't know me laughed and tried to like. steer me in the direction of the men's toilet instead and was like "wrong way!" are you fucking kidding me fuck off

#i have worked in this building for years. i know where the fucking bathroom is #like i'm sorry but cis people just don't want me in any bathroom at this point. i can't fucking win #i'm not kidding you i didn't really think that people in real life would actually make a fuss over who is in the bathroom #but at uni specifically i have had A LOT of people in the womens bathroom awkwardly tell me “uh i think you're in the wrong bathroom haha”#they're not even doing it in an antagonistic way it's like they genuinely think i've walked into the wrong one #and it makes ME feel like a creep or like i've done something wrong #like you guys are the ones that insist i should be in this bathroom !!!! but then i go in there and get told i'm in the wrong one !!!!#it's one of the few things that never fails to make me feel anxious and sad because it's a fucking bathroom it shouldn't be a big deal #why am i being made to feel like i've done something wrong when i'm just trying to exist here like everyone else #and you know what. it doesn't matter how i identify right. because i've actually done nothing to intentionally masculanise my appearance #like the entire time i've been out. i had short hair before i came out and i dressed this way before i came out #i have not done anything to try and Look Like A Man or Look Cis. i just have masc bone structure NATURALLY #so for all you know i could just be a woman with short hair ????? and you're telling me i don't belong in here because of that ??#like sure i'm NOT a woman with short hair but my point is you literally cannot tell the difference #so just leave people alone

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fruityumbrella · 5 days ago

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reading back my own wip is driving me crazy like fuck me this writing is so GOOD AAAAAA.

its not Objectively good of course, its too long winded and heavy handed and outright confusing in some parts bc of how wordy the sentences are, but its so absolutely perfect FOR ME. like its so good. im obsessed w myself. amen

#i wrote it just SO long ago like before a lot of my other wips and theres still nowhere to really Take it #which is why its sat there for months untended #-actually wait i distinctly remember writing the climax argument on the plane to utah. beautiful. anyway-#but the way i wrote it just. grisps me. like that picture of the hand holding the pigeon you know.#its so short maybe if i can just bridge the middle part without trying to draw it out too much i might even just post it #like why nawt. im sure someone out there would love a hard to read overdramatic fic<3 #obsessed w self but also killing self a little bc i read back the wips i wrote before my life fell apart and its so #it wasnt That long ago but the style and quality is different #up and down in different ways but overall the creative energy i had feels so completely out of reach now #i know im still writing and publishing and its doing alright #but theres just a certain spark thats been missing and im trying hard to compensate and work around it #but it makes me a bit sad to go back and have concrete proof that i used to have it #like idk there's something that feels so much more alive and dynamic in those wips...idk how to get that back ):

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satellitedarling · 2 months ago

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haha god listening to music and having scenarios in your head is so fun, yes the scenarios are about a hypothetical good relationship with my parents why do you ask

#vent #idk i feel like i have no one to turn to #like my parents are there but relying on them feels like walking on eggshells and hiding the effects of my transition #also one of them is just a plain Disney movie antagonist to be honest #hi also i am not depressed i swear! just very sad for some reason #im content with my life #in a sense i dont want to have to see anyone ever again #just rot away in my flat forever and ever and not have to worry about conflict or agression from the people in my life #maybe im selfish idk #the earth is the home of everybody on earth #not just me #also human connections? so hard!!!#i think i may be on the spectrum but im still waiting for the official diagnosis next month #but its like im always uncomfortable around people? like im some sort of strange social parasite who does everything ever wrong and is reall #y awkward and nobody liked me ever but also when someone says they do #there's simply nothing? as if they were inly words to me #and it's not only that i dont believe it possible #but also that i just dont know the feeling #it just makes me uncomfortable to hear that despite my friends possibly believing it #it's not their fault #but i just feel like there's a barrier between me and everyone #or maybe that I'm like just some minor occurance in all these wonderful people and i disappear from their lives as quickly as i arrived?#i dont know how to feel content truthfully #walking znd listening to music can only keep me pensive for so long #i just want to be comfortable sometimes #spend a few minutes not worrying #actually accepting care and love #being deadweight if only for one short while #and not hating myself for days afterwards

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floral-hex · 11 months ago

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hi it’s my birthday tomorrow

#had to redo this since someone left a comment that bummed me out a lot #well… didn’t HAVE to but I didn’t like seeing the notification #guess I could have just deleted their comment… shit… didn’t think about that #hey uhhhh please don’t be mean to me about my birthday. I’m just a sad lil guy 🥺#I already dislike my birthday. I hate feeling older. like I’m wasting my life.#it’s already usually an afterthought since it’s Christmas Eve #but with my mom’s surgery it’s even more of an afterthought and I’m so stressed and I have to take care of my bros and I’m just not great 😬#like… what do I even want to do tomorrow?#I’d love to just sleep in and eat junk and maybe go see a movie #but I have to go drive 40 minutes to see my mom and if I try to cut the visit short I’ll just feel guilty #so… I guess I’m spending my birthday watching my mom shake and cry in pain 🤷🏻‍♂️#which can be okay! I mean not okay but I can 100%… well… 85% live with that. it’s okay. it’s just a day.#but fuck does it hurt when people just ignore it or downplay it or make jokes about my birthday this year #people don’t have to care about my birthday. strangers online don’t have to care. it’s whatever.#and I’m not even mad at anyone in particular. I just… yeah.. I just can’t take negative jokes about it right now.#I’m trying not to be specific! I don’t want to be mean! nobody is being mean to me! it’s okay!#im just a sensitive baby that just wants people to be nice to him for the next 24 hours #…. I’m sad!#I think I’ll just be mean to everyone tomorrow #…. lol like I could do that. pfffttt I’ll bend over backwards for my family and I’ll be glad to do it. mostly.#it’ll be okay #days are 24 hours. I’m sure I can squeeze some good stuff in between the bad. that’s life babyyyy #and I love you and I appreciate you to no one in particular and I’m sorry I’m so sensitive #my mutuals are great #you’re all great. unless you aren’t. but we won’t talk about that.#ok you can ignore this #text

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skunkes · 2 years ago

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I guess in some ways having a life that is very small and dark has its benefits especially when one finally gets to lay in a sunbeam (⬅️ saying this as a step down from "getting to step into the light", which is the metaphor i was Gonna use but i havent stepped into the light yet/its been minimal...so sunbeam)

Like...im in persistent unending agony but every little small thing is a joy now that im finally getting to experience a bigger variety of little small things

#drove parents to walmart today i got to go buy stuff without anyone right next to me #since they were waiting at pharmacy for stuff #and i bought things and a paper trimmer for if i decide to make those prints #and some macadamia nut white chocolate cookies that im enjoying rn #and a dress❗#and im so sad right now and i dont know if and when things will ever get better for me #just like in general i dont have any visions of my future #but its okay i just have to focus on the cookies rn. and the prints. im Happy abt that much #talkys #i always feel i sound like such a faker when i make posts like dis #i promise im not being...stupid. life is so short and difficult its so difficult. its so difficult #but that can coexist with being insanely happy with the small stuff. it makes it easier to me #like of course im gonna be overjoyed that i got to listen to my music in the car today. what else do i have!

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mer-se · 6 months ago

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it’s crazy how people don’t think their death will affect people around them even if you aren’t close to them, or even if they were just semi passing encounters like no, others feel it. my neighbor died and as I park my car and look up at her dark little house it makes me so sad - I wanna go inside and turn on the lights she always has on. People notice and will feel it even if you don’t believe it.

#and I feel so bad because I saw her a couple of days ago and she was trying to give me flowers but I was rushing back to work #they’ve been on her porch she said take some and I haven’t and ew I feel bad #she was always trying to give me flowers and stuff because knows I like em #she was a lot but had a lot of issues going on #she use to come over crying all the time I knew so much about her life #and she genuinely cared about all of us over here #been like 16 years #I use to walk and also be chased by her dog way back in the day #stood in between her and her husband in a fighting match #one time she slid a picture of an owl under my door and we were so fucking creeped out because what #turned out it was her and she gave it to me because I love animals and photography hahah #l'd hide from her but feel bad and end up listening haha #she’d give me birthday cards because I share a birthday with one of her daughters #definitely an end to a era #I feel bad for her daughter she was sitting in her car while medical examiners were in the house #a bunch of ominious black vans outside for a bit #I should've taken the flowers 😕#I felt crazy guilty afterwards to the point I kept mentioning it and now I’m wondering if my spooky bitch body knew something #it's me and I wouldn't be that surprised I am all knowing even if I don't know you know?#seems odd #anyways I was thinking of leaving something for her daughter but I’m not sure when #she wasn’t home today #I’m not surprised by that #the flowers are still on her steps and it makes me really 😖#anyways life is short and weird and sad and ppl care

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the-casbah-way · 29 days ago

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sometimes being so overly sensitive makes it hard to function like how do people do it. today we drove past three dead pheasants and i'm expected to be fine about the fact that they died alone and in pain and everyone keeps driving as if they never mattered. as if they didn't live and breathe and think. ok

#how is this fine. am i insane. how is it not so devastating that it stifles you #today i learned that the life span of a wild fox is three to four years #does that not make you want to cry every time you see one in the street. knowing they will never be safe #how do you look at your cats and not feel consumed with sadness because they won't be here forever #and no matter what you do you can't ever guarantee that they will always be healthy and safe #and they don't even understand any of this because they're just babies #which should be comforting because it means they aren't aware of their own mortality #but it somehow makes it sadder. like you don't know you are the entire world to me and i will spend my life missing you #i fear i'm genuinely a bit mental #because this shit keeps me up regularly #maybe it's the ocd. or the autism. maybe i'm just weird #it does get worse when an animal dies. i guess rescuing duck + finding out he died is the reason this time #i rescue A Lot of animals so this happens to me all the time #and i don't get any better at dealing with it #i still think of the chicks + lambs + mice + chickens we couldn't save when i was a kid #and the fact that sometimes a litter of animals would be born and the universe just decided that one wasn't going to make it #and it would be lying there dying whilst its siblings got stronger and braver and ate and played #and it wouldn't know or understand that it had drawn the short straw for no reason and would never get to live #WHY is the world like this how do you make peace with that #they think duck was hit by a car. only a man made thing can do that amount of damage right #the fact he was just a little animal he was so small and delicate and then he ended up all mangled like that #it's so unfair. poor angel #ask to tag

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