#life is cruel for people with no social media
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
why are tattoo places only on instagram!! i don’t have instagram!!
i need to do something crazy or might flip
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
i'm sitting on my bed, letting my hair dry at midnight crying into my phone screen.
i've been scrolling for hours. i cry when a boy saves a bus full of school children, when kittens are born, when mothers hug someone else's child at a pride event, when people survive the worst. i cry when humanity is demonstrated, almost as if it's a shock for it to even exist.
i cry at my phone screen at midnight because the world is cruel and I feel every little bit of pain it feels.
#i find myself regularly crying#often scrolling i find myself crying over things that i feel like i should be able to get over quickly#but i dont#i have always stayed in other peoples pain or fear or happiness or anger#often i will out stay my welcome#on humanity#on social media#on humans#on empathy#on being an empath#i am an empath#empathy#empath#humanity#the world is cruel#on life#thoughts#my thoughts
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
IM THINKING.... I might come out of hiding from the search function 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 and I might partake the next time the sunshine meme rolls around 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 and I might just stop caring so much what people think 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔
#If someone is gonna know that it's me on here THEYRE GONNA KNOW whether i have an actual pic of myself or just drawings#and honestly at this point i just... dont care... like yes this is what brings me joy this is how i have fun and it always has been#the only reason i even get nervous is bc my career path is basically tied to social media and ppl can be cruel#but historically everything in my life improves SO much when i stop caring about what other people think#and I love being in this community and talking with you guys and being part of this place where people GET the ''weird'' thing that i do#and at this point i think fully embracing that is worth the risk of other people finding it and possibly thinking it's weird 😌#and HONESTLY ive said it before idek WHY i get nervous about ot because the chances of it happening ARE SO LOW ANYWAYS#spotlight effect!!! hate that mfer#this has been my daily long winded rant thanks for listening 🧁🍰🍪🍩🍥🌯🌮🥪🍟🥨🎁 <- plz take one as a thank u gift#caitiechat
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
This makes me so upset
You hate all outdoor cats because of one instance where a lost cat would have been found sooner if taken to a shelter- maybe redirect your anger then towards our huge stray cat overpopulation problem then? Rather than cats who healthily live both indoors and outdoors?
Because the consequences of your little anecdote goes both ways
My cat loves going outside- if we try and keep her inside too long she gets super wound up and tries everything she can to go outside (and yes, we play with her often, yes we have plenty of indoor stimulation as well ((especially when we have blizzards and super cold nights when it’s unsafe to let her out)) she is so well loved and even plays with my dog when we aren’t home)
One day though she didn’t come back home, and was missing for a week until we put up posters
Someone had taken our cat, who had lost her collar bc we have the slip collars or whatever they’re called so she doesn’t choke, and been mistaken for a stray and decided to keep her
They then had taken our cat inside and faced the same thing we do where she was constantly trying to get out, until they saw the posters and released her
She found her way back to our house easily bc she knows to return there. She’s smart, she’s been going outside since she was a kitten (as she was adopted and already loved being outside when we got her) and always without fail comes home
So I’m sorry if maybe I’m just reading your post the wrong way out of my own personal experiences, but to me it sounds like you’re doing the exact same thing as the ppl who caused that lady so much heartache by not handing the cat over to the shelter by keeping a cat after three days
You, out of spite, saying “my cat now” after THREE DAYS because of some vendetta for outdoor cats makes me sick. Because that means there is someone out there like you who could see my cat and just take her. (My cat is microchipped, so by your rules you wouldn’t take her, but there are others out there who do not check for that.)
You could be the very same cause of so much grief and heartache and fear because of the same ignorance you’re calling out
“Making it my (soon to be indoor) cat” is such a cruel way to phrase what you’re describing.
happy earth day. don’t forget that someone else’s outdoor cat is your indoor cat
#so tired of the outdoor cat discourse#ppl on social media forget how things are in real life#like I’m sorry are you gonna go to like some farmland and tell them not to keep barn cats to catch mice#when that’s primarily what they were bred for forever ago#this take is so cruel and so heartless#let people live as they want to live as long as they’re not hurting the pets and taking care of them well#I dont go around shitting on ppl for keeping their cats indoors#but at some point I’ll probably snap#bc if you kept my cat inside forever she would get depressed and lethargic#she would be so miserable and that thought breaks my fucking heart
37K notes
·
View notes
Text
in light of the recent news that Iranian President Ebrahim Raisi has been found dead after a helicopter crash you might be wondering 'who the hell is this guy and why are so many people celebrating his death??' and i'm here to answer that!
to fully understand what's going on we need to look into Iran's history: when the Iranian revolution in 1979 happened the authoritarian king who was ruling at that time was overthrown, but the ensuing power vacuum lead to the islamic regime seizing power and establishing Iran as an islamic republic
the following years were incredibly cruel to the Iranian people; thousands of people (especially minorities) have been protesting against the strict islamic regime leading to many being jailed, tortured and executed.
and this is where Raisi played a big part: in 1988 he was part of a committee that ordered the execution of thousands of political prisoners who were protesting the islamic regime, earning himself the title of "the butcher of tehran"
do not be fooled by what the state media wants you to believe, the Iranian people are celebrating his death. he was a cruel mass murderer who has destroyed the lives of thousands of people, his death should be used as a time to mourn for all the suffering he has caused, and bring new attention to the political prisoners still being held in Iranian prisions today
because sadly the fight is far from over. many of you have probably heard of the murder of Mahsa Jina Amini back in 2022, causing a new wave of nationwide protests and establishing the "woman, life, freedom" movement. the regime has gotten increasingly cruel in their treatment of the Iranian people, especially women, but the people of Iran are not deterred and keep fighting for a free Iran.
if you want to know how you can help, please keep talking about us. the one thing the regime hates is international attention, and in the past it has been proven that international pressure has stopped the regime from executing various political prisoners. people like Toomaj Salehi are under imminent threat of execution and spreading their names could save their lives. so whether you share social media posts or talk to your family and friends about what is happening in Iran, anything helps 🙏🏼
jin, jiyan, azadi ✌🏼
#iran#ebrahim raisi#global news#woman life freedom#iran news#politics#turns out trying to summarize decades of oppression into a semi-coherent tumblr post is harder than i thought#so i tried to make it as short and accurate as possible ! but let me know if any elaboration is needed#this is far from what i usually post but i thought someone might appreciate the explanation <3#and i will not stand for anyone mourning that guy may he rot in hell#thank you to everyone who took the time to read this it means a lot to me !!
7K notes
·
View notes
Text
if anyone needs help identifying things that can become moral scrupulosity OCD obsessions/compulsions, heres a list of some i've experienced:
rereading your posts/texts over and over
checking your notes and/or followers list frequently to "make sure" bad actors aren't interacting with you
checking OP's blog before interacting with posts
compulsively opening a social media tab to look at your notifs and then closing it, over and over
fearing ways that things you say/do (or don't do) could be taken in bad faith. being anxious that your words/actions will be misconstrued as morally wrong, bigoted, rude, or aggressive
feeling guilty or obsessing over whether you should or shouldn't have reblogged a post
feeling like you aren't "allowed" to disengage from online discourse or unfollow people who post it
fearing you're being stalked, talked about, or called out behind your back. fearing you'll never be forgiven and that people might even celebrate your disappearance or death, even though you havent done anything wrong
searching your own name/username to see if anyone is actually talking about you
imagining defenses you would make against nonexistent heinous accusations or arguments against you, to prove that you didnt do it
feeling like you have to roll over and become a doormat when others are cruel to you, because it could cause strife if you do anything other than grovel or apologize
having trouble enforcing your own boundaries out of fear that they are somehow "wrong" or unethical
ending up surrounded by people who have all the "right opinions" but are super mean and unpleasant, and make you feel like you have to walk on eggshells
fearing that just HAVING moral ocd makes you a bad person somehow (for example, i often fear that having moral ocd is somehow pushing a 'stranger danger' or misanthropist agenda, even though i actually have a lot of faith in my fellow humans)
some of these bullet points are not inherently bad on their own, but if you find yourself having this kind of anxiety very often, that's not normal, and it's time to get offline or even seek professional help if it's impacting your life
this list is catered to how online culture influences moral scrupulosity, it is not indicative of how everybody's moral scrupulosity functions, and it is not exhaustive
#amygdalae#ocd#actually ocd#moral ocd#moral scrupulosity#ive had OCD since as far back as i can remember but it used to be religious and contamination related#i actually started to grow out of my OCD symptoms until i started using social media as a teenager. i had trouble making friends IRL#i ended up in some very emotionally abusive online friend groups that basically trained these behaviors into me like a dog#its not entirely their fault. its something im just biologically predisposed to. and it can latch onto anything!#the wild part about OCD is that it grows and changes with you. for better or for worse
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
i wish trans ppl could have conversations about bottom surgery without it quickly devolving into really cruel, callous commentary. i also am not thrilled with the current options for bottom surgery available to me, because they are not a good fit for me + what i would want from that particular procedure. other people are going to have different needs + desires than my own.
outside of carefully curated facebook groups, every time someone brings bottom surgery up on social media, the comments are filled with "x surgery results look DISGUSTING" "why would i want genitals that don't even work" "what's the fucking point? it's a waste" "it'll never look like/be a real x, anyway" alongside absurdly false or outdated information about risks or outcomes (do not let people convince you that the sexual gratification or aesthetics you desire are 'impossible' without doing your own research- the options are much more advanced + plentiful than you might think)
there are members of our community who have had those surgeries. those are their post-surgical bodies you are calling disgusting or accusing of being fake/useless/wasteful. these are surgeries that people pursue for their entire lives, run through their savings for, lose their relationships or jobs for-- would it kill you to talk about their bodies respectfully? transitioning bodies are so vilified in day-to-day life, could we at least commit to not feeding that?
#imagine if you logged on + saw a bunch of tumblr ppl calling your genitals disgusting fake unusable#then incorrectly stating you were incapable of having sex or peeing correctly or whatever
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
— longing for someone prompts ◛⑅·˚ ༘ ♡
im bathing in angst rn, enjoy!
them haunting your mind constantly, but are you even in theirs?
unconciously searching for them wherever, whenever
itching to text them, yet the guilt of pestering them hits
your stomach being on edge whenever you see someone who has a similar figure to theirs
regularly scouring their social media for any updates
them acting so sweetly which turns out to just be a cruel dream
envy creeping up your throat whenever other people hangout with them
taking them off your mind by hanging out with your friends, just for you to only see bits of their personality in your friends
weeping frustruatedly on your knees because you can't stop recalling your memories with them
surrendering to your insecurities; perhaps they truly are better off without you
hopelessly persuading yourself that you were able to go on with life before knowing them, so you can definitely do it after they left
urging the universe to see them one last time before letting them go (it never happens anyways)
"if anyone is listening, please let our paths intertwine again before the day I take my last breath"
#imagine your otp#otp prompts#dialogue prompt#otp ideas#romance prompts#writing scenarios#angst dialogue#light angst#missing someone prompts#angst prompts#writing prompts#wow i was really feeling myself with this one#idk if this is platonic or romantic rip#breakup prompts#heartbreak prompts
6K notes
·
View notes
Text
"If nothing else gets you through. Then darling, i'll cry with you" | LN4
parings: Lando Norris x reader.
Summary: after the chaotic Brazilian GP, you know Lando is verygood at lying that he is alright and nothing can move him. But with you he can't pretend.
Now playing: "Cry with you" by Jeremy Zucker.
Word count: +1,2k.
Warnings: I think none. A few cursed words I guess and mentions of anxiety. Not a native English speaker so there could be (so many) errors. Not proofread.
Author's note: so today was the shittiest day at the office y’all! I still feel like shit but I needed to write something about this. Why is Lando so hated??? You need to check yourselves!! Don’t forget to like or reblog! And follow me so we can be friends :3 (and drink mate together!)
MASTERLIST
The Brazil GP it’s been the toughest so far. The Championship of drivers was also kind of defined. Of course Max was gonna win. He wasn't a three time world champion by luck. He is really one of the best drivers this sport has ever seen in history along with Senna, Prost, Lewis and Schumacher. But all of that indicated that your boyfriend was not gonna win the championship this year and that shuttered your heart.
You knew how hard Lando worked on that. All of the media attacked him. Social media twisting his words in a really cruel way. It was all too much noise and you perfectly knew how hard it was for him. How much anxiety he was handling and all of the pressure he was putting on himself. The pressure and illusion of the team to be back at the top after so many years decided it was gonna be Lando the one who did that. And that was a correct choice, lando was more than capable of winning the championship. But at some point it all happened so fast the pressure was descomunal.
You knew your boyfriend. You know how hard he’s worked all year. How much this all meant to him. You didn’t have holidays this year because he really wanted to fight. Train. And attack. Or at least that’s what he wanted to do.
You knew he was really good at pretending and playing it cool so people won’t ever know how much hurt his carrying. He could play the super hero indestructible for all the camaras. You won’t see him shattered right then and there. But you knew him too damn well to know he was broken. He hoped to be the winner. He dreamed about it his whole life. And this magical year was finally the one who gave him the chance to almost be it. This race was the hardest. It was luck and skills to the limit. A lot of crashes. The rain was irritating at one point. You almost didn't want to keep watching. When Lando got off track and went down to P6, you knew. He didn’t reply to any message through the radio. You cried, of course you did. You were on this as much as he was in it. You cried out of frustration. This year was a rollercoaster for you. You also dreamed of the day Lando won. You wanted that to happen even more than he wanted to. He deserved it. For how hard he works. How hard he is on himself when something out of his hands happens. Or when he made a mistake. How hard was all of that on his mental health. How obsessed he could get. And how that could send him into a spiral. You knew this was the best year at the same time it was the worst one.
When you watched him walk into the garage where you were. Your heart broke. Not because he was angry or even sad. He was playing it cool like it was not a big deal at all. So you knew how much pain he was handling.
Your eyes met after he talked to his engineers and mechanics. You were so sad this weekend. So good yet forgettable.
“Hey” he said walking to you and you just couldn’t help but dropped a few tears hugging him so tightly. You were squeezing him at some point. He let you do it. And rested his head on your neck. He fought the tears in his eyes so hard in that moment.
“I’m so proud of you. You are so strong Lando. So talented” you said now looking at him trying to repair something with your thoughts on him but knowing it won’t change anything. But you just wanted him to know he was all of that and the greatest person alive you knew. He kissed you gently.
“I love you y/n. Thank you for always supporting me” he said and gave you a kiss on the cheek giving you another hug. You didn’t say anything but hugged him tightly. After a few seconds another person joined and by the giggles he left out, you both knew it was Oscar. You two giggled a little. It was a family hug.
After that intimate little moment, the media had to be done so you had to say goodbye for a while.
(…)
After dinner with the papaya family you decided it was night in. Lando showered again because he said he had a headache. You haven’t talked about how he feels yet. You didn’t want to be invasive and more because this was a very sensitive topic to discuss. You knew he would eventually crack and talk to you. Like he always did.
You put on your pajamas and waited for him by just looking out the window at the city of São Paulo. After a few minutes la do was out. You turned to look at him. He was by his luggage wearing only a towel looking for a boxer and T-shirt. You could see his whole back. He took off the towel and put the clothes on. You looked to the bed and climbed in it waiting for him. You analyzed him one more time while he got cozy on the bed with you.
“Stop looking at me like that. I’m okay babe” he said, like reading your mind. You gave him a half smile.
“You sure? We can talk about it baby” you said softly and got closer to him so you could stroke his hair sweetly. He looked at you and nodded. But then his eyes were full of tears so he denied. Your heart sinks. “Come here my love” you said, bringing me to your chest and hugging him in a way for him to find comfort somehow. He hugged you and hid his face in your neck so you couldn’t see him. “It’s okay baby. I know it was q fucking shitty day at the office. I know how much you wanted it. And you deserve it still, baby. But life is sometimes a bitch you know? I mean the alpines got the podium” you said trying to make him feel better. He was still crying and all you could read was he tigherter his grip. “Sometimes life is a bitch to the people that don't deserve it. Amazing people who are good and so no harm but somehow get the harder life mode now and then. This makes you stronger, Lando. I know next years gonna be. You will do it. Because you can and because you want to. And that more than enough because talent you already have babe” he moved a little under your hug. You heard him giggle a little. That makes you smile a little too.
You stoked his curls gently and kissed his forehead.
“I love you and admire you so fucking much. You deserve the world and I know you will eventually get it” you told him now looking into his eyes holding his face between your hands. His face was wet and his eyes teary. Seeing him like this broke your heart in so Many pieces. But you knew he was gonna be okay. He was gonna be world champion one day.
“I don’t know what I did to deserve you. I love you” he said with a shaky voice and you gave him a little kiss.
“You just did you landinho” you said sweetly making him smile and you gave him another million kisses.
——————————————————————————————-
Hope you liked it 💌 if you have any ideas my inbox is open so send your requests!
#f1 x reader#f1 fic#f1 imagine#f1 x female reader#f1 x you#lando norris#lando norris x reader#f1 fanfic#lando norris fluff#lando norris fanfic#lando x y/n#lando norris imagine#lando x you#lando x reader#lando norris x you
479 notes
·
View notes
Text
My dear lgbt+ kids,
This is just a short reminder for your (and everyone else’s) sanity: commenting stuff like „and meanwhile people are dying :/“ under, like, a slime video or a recipe for chocolate cake achieves absolutely nothing.
That’s not spreading awareness. That’s not rallying people to take action. That’s not activism. That’s just unhealthy.
It’s impossible to think about the horrors 24/7 with absolutely no break. You can’t do that without burning yourself out and ruining your mental health. You’re not going to help any cause or anyone if you’re drowning in depression. The only way to make a sustainable difference in this world is to keep yourself alive and well. Life is like a plane ride: you gotta put your own oxygen mask on before you can assist other passengers.
I don’t want to sound rude or dismissive here. I get it. You care so deeply and you feel crushed and helpless because you don’t have the power or influence or money to just singlehandedly save the world and you just want to do something, and typing „Baking cake while people are literally dying feels cruel, you should use your time better :/ “ under that Instagram video relieves some of that pain and guilt. It feels like you are doing at least a tiny bit - but let’s be honest here, that comment doesn’t achieve anything beyond your temporary relief. The opposite, actually: you are just making others (and yourself) feel bad, and that has never been a great way to make people care.
It’s pretty presumptuous too: that person sharing their recipe probably does not think exclusively about chocolate cake, they just run a baking account! They lead a whole life offline. They could be very actively involved in your cause off of social media already.
I’m not saying never start conversations about the causes you deeply care about or that all social media based activism is useless. I’m just saying be mindful of how you go about it. Start conversations - don’t just try to relieve your guilty feelings by making others feel guilty.
And allow yourself to just take a break and have some cake. Sometimes that’s the best thing you can do to fight the horrors: by replenishing your energy, so you can continue to help in the long run.
With all my love,
Your Tumblr Dad
806 notes
·
View notes
Text
🧁🎀IT GIRL GUIDE 🧁🎀
This is a guide to help you become an IT girl . The term IT girl isn't same for everyone . For some it means a girl who has achieved a high celebrity status at a young age. For some, it means a girl who takes care of herself . In kpop , this title is mostly given to the ones who stay relevant for a longer time , have alot of brand deals & has made alot of impact on others - especially in fashion. What does being an IT girl means to you ?
🎀Tips to become an IT girl 🎀
1) Healthy Skin
I have noticed how the most popular IT girls have healthy , clear and glass skin . For example : Song Jia, Jang Wonyoung , Jennie etc . They all have clear skin. Try to visit a dermatologist, get to know your skin type and develop a skin care routine which suits you. Get enough sleep , stay hydrated , don't touch your face with dirty hands & don't pick your pimples .
2)Workout
Wonyoung , Song Jia & Jennie take great care of their bodies . You must have seen Jennie's instagram posts , she is consistent & practices pilates daily. Wonyoung & Jia also practice pilates to stay in shape . Here is a video of them practicing pilates , click here for wonyoung & click here for song jia . Karina also workouts to maintain her body. This video can motivate you.
It's not necessary that you need to do pilates just because Wonyoung , Jia or Jennie does it , if you don't like pilates , find any other exercise like yoga,HIIT , cardio etc or any sport like swimming , badminton etc . Basically , just find any exercise whether it's pilates , cardio etc or sport like swimming , badminton etc to keep yourself in shape . Don't limit exercise to only weight loss , it will not only help your physical health but will help your mental health too !
3) Fashionsta
An IT girl should know how to choose outfits which compliment her . Get to know your body type and experiment with different kind of style to know which style suits you . You can take inspiration from celebrities too !
4) Elegance
Wonyoung , Jia , Jennie , Nayeon , Irene , Karina, Bae Suzy etc . These all IT girls are elegant . Wonyoung radiates princess & royalty vibes because of her elegance . Maintain a good posture which will make you appear elegant and confident . Be gentle & kind . Have a good grammar & vocabulary. Read more. Have a signature fragrance . Maintain personal hygiene. Here are some posts which have more tips on how to look elegant - this one by @malusokay & this one by @femmefatalevibe
5) Confidence & Self Love
Wonyoung , Song Jia , Irene , Jennie , Nayeon etc. These all IT girls have confidence& love themselves. They are confident in themselves .They put themselves first .Improving your self concept can also help 🤭. Remember what Wonyoung said ? She said how she only tends to give herself love . Song jia also said that she really loved herself & her phone wallpaper was herself ! Also don't chase anyone , chase your goals . Spend your time creating a beautiful garden & the butterflies will come !! This post by @girlbloggerbby has wonderful self love tips , I hope it helps you ! Also this post by @malusokay & this one by @ribbonie
6) TRENDSETTER
All these it girls are not only fashion icons but also trendsetters.Don't try to be like anyone else , take inspiration If you want to ! Learn from everyone, follow no one . Be your own trend setter. Don't follow trends , SET THEM !!
7) IDAF attitude
People can be really cruel & harsh sometimes . When it comes to social media, I would say these days , most of the time , comment section is always full of hatred. Song Jia got alot of hate for the stupid fake clothes scandal and she still gets hate till now but she doesn't allow it to affect her anymore. She is just busy in improving herself & her life. She doesn't let hate get to her. Wonyoung , Karina, nayeon etc they all get hate for just breathing but they don't let the negativity get to them . Stop seeking validation from others and don't care about their opinions . Most of the time we get hate when we have done nothing wrong , it's better to realize our worth at that time & know that people often project their own insecurity on others . I hope this post by @prettieinpink helps you & I have affirmations too related to seeking self validation , not external. Idaf mentality affirmations by @vixeneptune .
8) Have hobbies
This is inspired from Jia , she always spend time with herself & her hobbies . It can be anything - singing , dancing , writing poetry , painting, cooking etc . It doesn't have to make sense to others , just do it for you and your own happiness. You don't need to master It as well , write the most rubbish poetry in the world , it doesn't matter , as long as it makes you happy . Don't try to seek validation for your hobbies as well . If you like it , then just do it .
9) Be smart & hardworking
Wonyoung got 100/100 in science , English and Korean. She also won several math and science competitions . Romanticize studying & being smart . Read more & give your best in studies ! Nayeon , Wonyoung , Jia , Karina , Irene , Jennie etc they all are extremely hardworking .
10 ) Be mysterious
Song jia , Wonyoung , Jennie , Irene, Alexa Demie etc are mysterious . Don't reveal too much about yourself . Be more private . Keep your goals & emotions a secret . Most of the time people can use your secrets against you too or demotivate you when you share your goals with them .
11) Affirm
This tip is probably the most easiest and simple one . You can manifest being an IT girl!! Just affirm like you are an IT girl . Act like her& affirm and you will become one! You can also use the Jia , Wonyoung , Jennie etc affirmations to become like them! Wonyoung & Jia affirmations by @magic-irl . Wonyoung & Irene affirmations by @heejinisoutofideas . Wonyoung , Jia & Jennie affirmations made by me !! Alexa demie is also considered an IT girl & Meghan also. Affirmations by @nevillesgod for Alexa & @magic-irl for meghan . It girl affirmations by @vixeneptune . More affirmations for it girl by @cyber-f4iry . It girl vaunt by me .
#affirmations#law of assumption#self concept#neville goddard#master manifestor#it girl#loa#self concept affirmations#affirm and persist#assume and persist#it girl mentality#it girl journey#wonyoungism#wonyoung motivation#song jia#manifesting tips#self care#self love#how to manifest#affirm your life#dream life#self growth#self confidence#self improvement#self development#dream girl#that girl#it girl energy#girlblogging#girlblogger
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
youtube
... y'all know Lae'zel is acting scared, right?
Video transcription: I've seen a lot of comments on my short about Lae'zel dismissing her entire character because she's mean and… I'm just checking in here… you guys know she's scared, right? She's terrified. She was kidnapped by the worst monster she knows, infected with the most horrifying death anyone in her culture can have, and then stranded on a hostile world, alone, with nothing to guide her except the dogmatic military cult indoctrination of a cruel lich demigod, telling her that her only hope of salvation is to follow Gith doctrine with total unyielding faith. And still she tries to save you. When she keeps insisting that you must get to the Githyanki crèche, it's our only hope, she's trying to guide you towards the only salvation she knows from the parasite, so she can share it with you. And Gith... aren't supposed to do that, saving an outsider is not part of the doctrine, she's breaking the rules trying to do right by you. None of that means she's not being an asshole, she's rude, dogmatic and unpleasant. But everything she does comes from a genuine, very misguided and abrasive, desire to do the right thing. It doesn't make her behaviour okay, but there is more to her character than just "being the mean one."
To expand on this a bit more than I can in a 60 second short, people acting from fear and from their damage is a major theme among the Baldur's Gate 3 companions.
Lae'zel is terrified and falling back on the only thing she believes will give her back some control over her situation, which is the dogma of the military cult she's in. Shadowheart is much the same, amnesiac and grasping on to the only solid thing she knows, which is her faith, which preaches deception, loss and duplicity as the only certain factors in life.
Gale is an inveterate people-pleaser desperately dependent on other people to help him feed his magic addiction, with his overtly affable exterior hiding a rolling boulder of guilt, ambition, greed, arrogance and legitimate hurt. Asterion is... well, no way to really lay out his deal without spoiling, but the boy has been through it and his self-destructive, hedonistic and selfish impulses are all coping mechanism and self-defense all the time.
None of that make their shitty behaviours okay, but in a fictional story, those kinds of flaws and toxic behaviours are what make for interesting stories and characters. I don't blame anyone for finding Lae'zel unpleasant and abrasive, but I do get a bit Old Man Yells At Cloud about people who casually brag about shoving her off a cliff-side, or murdering her because "she was a bitch" or whatever.
Like... being unable to face discomfort in your media is not a virtue, and lashing out reactively against fiction that doesn't validate your power fantasy isn't a flex.
Of course, I saw a lot of those reactions in YouTube comments and on social media, so my sample is biased by those algorithms, but still. A lot of people seem aggressively proud that they never engaged with her story because the terrified indoctrinated child-soldier wasn't immediately nice to them and I can't explain it but something about that reaction feels puritan to me.
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
Bookish girlfriend you're my yum yum - Mark Webber x reader
Summary : After going viral on book social media, you give the fans a completely new side of you. It catches the eye of an author (who happens to be a 9 GP winner)
FC: Mima by Cami
inkscentedglamour: Squeezing in some last girly romance books before I film a new video for you 👀
username: Our queen is finally trying romantasy, I can feel it.
username: I need another object x human romance. I know it was an April Fools thing, but I need her to read Double Stuffed
username: DARK ROMANCE. DARK ROMANCE. DARK ROMANCE.
username : I know the sports romance PR is talking to her like the Green Goblin Mask
> username : Especially the new book with the MMC inspired by Danny Ricciardo
> username: need to rewatch her F1 romance streams on patreon.
username: Do you think this is after Two Girls One Formula podcast backlash?
> username: The girls brought her on to talk about books, specifically romances. I don't understand why the fans were attacking her for not talking much about the current grid and things like that and focusing on the fiction.
> username: Especially when she has said many times that she's easing into the fandom. How would you feel if people bullied you for starting with edits/ fanfics and books, like she's doing?
inkscentedglamour: Writing my script for the upcoming video and staring at what got me here
username: Throttled slander era, you will forever be famous
> username: The way she started off so hesitant to give it a bad review or DNF it. This was her first 1 star. People died.
> username: Asking people to still try it for themselves and to not just judge it based on her review. Cemented her as my favorite BookTuber, I fear.
username: The fact that she still followed through and read the entire series. And rearranged her entire Goodreads ratings after that? Iconic
> username: I miss her giving 5 stars. But the quote "if I can be cruel enough to give 1 star, then I don't think I should be generous to give 5 stars to any book, but one" will forever live on.
inkscentedglamour: New video, out now
username: MARK WEBBER????? OVER EMILY HENRY????
> username: over Christina Lauren?????? Ali Hazelwood? Katee Robert
username: you're telling me an Australian driver who retired like 10 years ago is her favorite author??? And was the driving force for her to get her to watch a GP?
username: she's the queen of Booktok, has talked about every book boyfriend, and now she's into cars that go fast?
aussiegrit: Talked about Porsche, F1, Mentoring Oscar, and my book, somehow. Why is Aussie Grit trending?
username: Oh no, our little Booktuber girl bossed too close to the sun (she has a million subscribers and multiple brand deals)
> username: she got it to 5 stars on Goodreads and onto the trending page on Amazon.
username: Mark, wear the My fake boyfriend drives for F1 mech, and my life is yours
username: @inkscentedglamour, look who sorta knows you exist.
inkscentedglamour: Oh oh
inkscentedglamour: Reading the book 😄🤩🥺 vs. having to describe its impact on you, your career, and the future 🙃😑☠️. If you see me verbally abusing a Google doc at the airport, no you didn't
username: Mark Webber in the likes?????????
> username: I guess he found out why Aussie Grit was trending
username: reading video hiatus is over, society is healing
> username: we haven't gotten a part two of her trip to a random destination yet
> username: true, she just packed and left us on a cliffhanger. Surely we're getting that first
> username: her caption says it all. For book lovers, some of you have no reading comprehension.
inkscentedglamour: I finished reading my book, so it only makes sense to hit the thrift, right? Reading vlog will be up when I'm back home (I was strictly told to relax)
username: the two glasses (which could mean nothing)
> username : this is the girl that relies on our discord pins to drink water, what is going on in the house of commons
username : Mark Webber, here again????????? Before me?????????????
> username: she sped through her book cause she has his new book on pre-order
> username: I just know she'll get it on Kindle too, no way is she waiting til it ships to her house
username: Mark's pr team was sleeping because wdym they didn't reach out to her
> username: And apparently, he's got a launch party coming up with "surprise BookTube influencer" attending
inkscentedglamour : Photographic proof that my favorite author knows I exist. Thank you, @aussiegrit, for the invite. And thanks for getting a decent picture before I cried at the blurb and dedication
aussiegrit: Figured you'd wanna skip the queue at Waterstones. Can't wait for your review of this one (also please re-read the new prologue before posting)
username: Mark has been secretly divorced for a year and was writing this whole book as a therapy exercise??????
> username: he couldn't tell anybody and felt like he was slowly fading into obscurity, which affected his mental health
> username: he was not thinking of releasing this until the OG Aussie Grit review
> username: Mark saying that the YouTube video changed his life, just as much as it did hers
inkscentedglamour: Night and day
Comments on this post have been disabled
14.02.2025,approximately 3 months after the book launch
inkscentedglamour: Valentine's Day, Book Buying Day, and Merch Drop Day. Shop the My Real Boyfriend Drove for F1 tee. And yes, he signed off on this specific hard launch
inkscentedglamour: time to be sappy real quick after the merch plug. Mark has been inspiring me, guiding me and showering me with praise ever since his second book launch. I'm so happy he's in my life and I intend to keep him there for as long as I can. He beats all the bookish boyfriend one can have (yes, even Zafir)
aussiegrit: I'm so glad to have you in my life. You see me and be with me, sharp tongue,flaws and all. I wanna build you bookshelves and watch you put my books on them last. Now stop being a YouTuber for a second and get back to being my girlfriend.
#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 smau#f1 social media au#mark webber x reader#mark webber x you#mark webber smau
370 notes
·
View notes
Note
hi! pls do something where reader is xavis daughter and shes helpin' him with water and other things at the trainings because shes like grounded but not everyone knows shes his kid and she and pedri become closer and he defend her when one of the team say something cruel to her pls
Sorry my english is not the best is not my first language
Water girl
Summary: The team doesn't know you're Xavi's daughter until Pedri and you begin a relationshp and everything comes to light.
Warnings: cursing, physical altercation, slut shaming.
A/N: This is long, I kinda got inspired and wanted to share something with you. Hope you like it ❤️ love you✨️🌸 @gadriezmannsgirl hi 😛❤️
"You have to be kidding me. There's no way in hell I'm spending my vacation like this." You yell, hurrying upstairs.
The thing about being the kid of an elite football player is that you're not faster than them. They will always win.
You tried to close your door, but Xavi managed to stop it before it closed. "Go away, oh my God."
"That's the good thing about being your father, mi reina. You obey what I say, not the other way around. So go change and meet me in the car."
He slams the door on his way out. But the door is opened again, this time by Nuria. "You better hurry up. He's going to come back and take you to the car even if you're in pajamas."
"Nu, that's totally unfair." You whine, walking to your closet. "Are you seriously allowing this?"
"Don't forget to put on some sunscreen." She waves you goodbye and close the door.
You grab a leggin, an oversized t-shirt, and put on your Jordans. You did put on some sunscreen, not wanting to do anything with your hair, only putting it up.
"Bye, if I die, this is on you guys. Hope you know that." You told your stepmother on your way out. She laughs at your annoyed behavior.
Xavi is waiting on his car. He has this big smile on his face. To you is like he's laughing at you. You walk slowly to the car, making him raise an eyebrow.
"I'm the boss, I can be late if I want to, so don't worry. No matter how slow we are still going to make it." He says as you open the car door.
"Papi, please."
"Let's go, reina."
Having no other option, you hop up. He was giving you a talk about life and having goals. The talk continued until you made it to the training camp.
"Your uncle Oscar is waiting for you. Please go to my office." He says, handing you a "staff" card. "This opens the doors."
You obey, walking the way you already know. The long hallway that only staff members are allowed to be, and different offices, some for the technical team, some for meetings, his office.
You knocked before walking inside, your uncle was on his phone, writing something he was reading on a board.
"Hey."
"Hola, reina." He smiles, leaving what he's doing to get close and hug you. "So happy to see you again."
"Hola, I missed you so much." You hug him back. He was patting your back. "Please help me, I don't want to do this."
The sound of the door opening and laughs saved the moment for you. It was your dad with a blonde lady.
"Oh hello! It's so good to have you back."
"Hello." You smiled, not the best at picking conversations.
"Gosh, Xavi. Your daughter is so big. I remember when I last saw you at your father vows renewal, you were so small."
"This is Martina. She's the boss of the interns and some social media people." Xavi says, you smile again but this time nodding your head. "She will be your boss."
"Your father tells me that you wanted to get something to do now that you're here in Barcelona."
"Yes, something to do." You say sarcastically, Xavi gave you a look. "I'm happy to be here." You lie.
"Well, I need some help in the recovery training. They need someone who helps with the water."
"Like a water girl?"
"Si, you're going to be their water girl."
You nod, eyes on your father, who's smiling in a particular way that's making you angry. "That's great, let's go."
Martina guides you to the little room with coolers, some freezers with ice packs, a bunch of stock of Gatorade, water, and water bottles of the sponsor.
"So, we already fill this one with Gatorade and some wattle bottles from prime, the players who are in recovery have a more private training, so you're with them."
You let her explain to you the training hours, the days the social media girls were there to film and that day you had to bring the prime bottles, the Gatorade thing that makes squishi drinks and how to fill it.
"I want to ask you something."
"Whatever you want, yes?"
"I don't want anyone to know that I'm Xavi's daughter, I want just to be like an intern, maybe?"
Martina nods her head. She gets what you mean, not wanting to be favored. "We can do that." She smiled. "Also, we have these t-shirts for interns to change into, so before going to the training camp, you can change."
You went to the nearest bathroom and changed the oversized t-shirt. Leaving the old one in the little closet because Martina said so.
You grab the small cooler, walking with Martina, who was explaining to you who you were working with. You had to be there the whole training and offer the player some water every two series of exercise.
"You're today with Raphinha and Pedri. So it's going to be easy, they're nice and friendly."
She led you to the training camp, Oscar was helping the two players to warm. He waves you happy, and you return the wave.
"If you need a pointer, Pedri likes blue Gatorade and Raph likes the red one."
"Which one is Pedri?" You ask confused, not really knowing who was who because you weren't used to the team.
"The one without tattoos. I have a meeting with some interns, see you later, hun."
"Okay, have fun in your meeting."
The training was boring, nothing new. They were making a smoother training because of their injuries.
Oscar stands next to you, almost at the middle of the training. "Your dad once brought you to the training. You made everybody do push-ups. He went home super proud about you liking football."
You smile at the story, not really remembering about it. "Uncle Andres used to say I was going to be playing as a forward."
"Nah, you have more as a midfielder."
"What position do they play on?"
"Pedri is a midfielder, Raphinha is a right winger." He points at them once he mentions their names. "Venga chicos, take five and we continue."
You get up from the bench, walking to the players. They were chatting and making jokes.
"Hola, tengo agua." You say awkwardly. (Hi, I got water)
Raphinha laughed at how uncomfortable you look, more used to interns or water girls who were ready to flirt with them.
"First day?"
"Is it that obvious?" You shrug your eyes.
"A little, just used to other type of treatment." He jokes, moving his eyebrows up and down.
You don't know what face you made, but Pedri laughed at your facial expressions.
"Te mandaron a comer papilla." He laughs, hitting Raphinha on his arm. (You were rejected)
"I like you. Can you pass me the red Gatorade?" Raphinha looks at you up and down.
You get both colors, passing one to Pedri as well. He thanked you and smiled a little with you. You go back next to your uncle.
Training was quick. It wasn't like the first team due to their injuries.
You can't help but feel something weird about the job. You haven't been on a training or stadium since you were a kid.
"Hola, oye, puedes darme una botella de agua?" (Can you pass me a bottle of water), he whispers, noticing that you're distracted.
You go back to reality. Nodding and handing him the bottle of water.
"Is it fun working here?" He asks.
"Considering this is my first day like you figure out, I think it's good." You say, half smile on your face.
"Bueno, not all first times are good." He shrugs, smiling at you.
You wanted to laugh, but you just smile and nod. "Yep, that's true."
"Thank you." He hands you the bottle again. Walking back to the field.
🪷🪷🪷
The next days were easy for you. Even when you didn't want to say it, you did enjoy watching them train and do other activities than be home.
You got assigned with the recovery team as long as there were players training.
"For how long are they training like this?" You ask curious.
"Until the medical team tell us that they can train and play with the first team."
"What happened to Pedri?" You say, eyes fixed on his back. He was doing some penalties practice.
"He injured himself a long time ago, and that same injury is coming back now." He says, you nod in response. "Frenkie, don't skip that part, I'm watching you, son."
They do another five rounds until the next break. Pedri walked over to you again. "El calor está." He wipes the sweat with his hand. "How can you look so fresh? It's like hell fire."
"I used to live in Brazil, this is fresh for them." You confess.
"Wow, Brazil." He smiles. "Can I have some water?"
"Two euros per bottle." You joke, handing him the bottle. "And five per Gatorade."
"I don't have change on me, but if I found you after the training, I'll make sure to pay my debt." He smiles, throwing the bottle back in the cooler.
"I'll take that as a promise." You say, returning the smile.
"Maybe you can tell me about Brazil." He says, going back to the middle of the field where Oscar is explaining something to Frenkie.
You check your phone while the training finishes. You texted Nuria what you were doing with a picture of the cooler.
"Reina, go back inside. The weather is crazy hot, and we're almost done. You can leave the cooler."
"You sure?" You ask, leaving your phone. "I can wait."
"Do me a favor, this are notes about today's training, take them to my office and you can go do some other thing."
You nod, leaving the little cooler there and asking him to take care of it, saying you will be back for it.
You walked back to the office. You still have your dad's card from the first day so you can enter every place.
You wanted to stay inside and relax in the air conditioner but you wanted to do a nice job as you were charged.
You go back to the field to collect the cooler and take it to its place. Stealing a Gatorade for yourself while you walk back inside.
"That would be five euros, or do you have a discount?"
You turn to find Pedri smiling. He has a prime bottle in his hands. You smile back, sipping on your drink again.
"It's the payment for our job." You say, sassy teasing tone.
"I thought interns didn't get paid."
"We don't?" You ask, confused. "Well, that's sad."
You pout at the thought of it. He finds that funny because he thought the first thing they told the interns is that they're not getting paid.
"So I own you seven." He jokes.
"Make it twenty, I have to make a living." You shrug smiling. Thing that makes him smile back.
"Twenty and a talk? Or those come with an extra charge." The tone of his voice and the way he's closer than before got you thinking not so good things.
You were about to answer, but a voice calling your name from behind makes you turn back.
"How was your first day?" Martina asks. "Pedri, hola."
"Hola, I was returning the bottle and saying a little thank you for helping with the water today, especially with this weather."
"Super hot." Martina laughs. "So good you had a nice day. Let me help you with the little cooler, and you can follow me."
"Sure," you whisper to her. Turning back to the black hair boy. "See you around." You wave your hand goodbye, following Martina.
She guides you to a room with three other people, all boys. They were seated around a little table talking.
"Hey boys, this is Y/n." She introduces you, you smile waving at them. "She's new, just came and she's our new water girl."
"Hey, that's my job," a blonde guy jokes. "I'm Marcus. This is Pablo, and this is Carlos."
"Hi, nice to meet you all. Sorry about the job, by the way."
"Please explain to her the time slip and Marcus, don't worry, I'll find you a new thing to do."
She left, saying her goodbyes. You stood there awkwardly, not sure what to do know.
"Take a sit, we were chatting about the next game." Carlos pat the chair next to him. "Are you a barca fan or just here for the experience?"
"Here for the experience." You say. "Are you barca fans?"
"Carlos is a Madrid fan but don't tell anybody."
"I'm not, I just said I like Ronaldo more than Messi."
They kept doing jokes about football, you check the time slip on the wall, to your surprise you are on it.
Most of the "soft training" was assigned to you, only two days for the "regular training" that was with the whole team.
"Hey, new girl."
"Si?"
"We have a fifteen minute break. We usually sneak in the kitchen and stole some food."
"I'm in, let's go."
🪷🪷🪷
You helped with ordering the equipment for the first team, putting the cones in order and taking out the bands they used to exercise in duos.
You finished positioning the equipment, leaving the field as the players began walking upstairs.
"Hey, come here." Xavi calls you. You walk over to your dad slowly, noticing him getting impatient. "Can you hurry?"
"Yes, sir?"
"Can you go help your uncle at the gym?"
"Doing what?" You ask funny, "holding the weight while he works out?" You smirk.
"Don't be a smart-ass, reina." He tries not to laugh. "He's helping Pedri and Lewandowski. He needs help with something, I'm not sure."
You nod, walking downstairs and to the gym. After getting into the wrong place for the second time, you knew you had to ask someone.
"Are you lost?" Pedri asks.
You smile at the dark-haired boy in front of you. "Yes, this place is too big."
"Trust me, we all got lost the first week." He laughs at the thought. "Where are you going?".
"The gym, Xavi assigned me to help Oscar."
He points the direction with his head. Making you walk side by side with him.
"Oye, don't think I forgot you own me fifty." You joke. Hitting his shoulder with yours.
"Why is the price increasing by the hour?"
"Why not?" You laugh with him. "But don't worry, after the fifty the talk is free."
"It better be," He jokes back. "Well, here we are."
You walk over to your uncle, asking him how can you help him. He instructed you to help him take time and to write down the weight the players are lifting.
You sat in a machine with a notepad and a chronometer. You were timing every round to help with consistency in the training.
"Be nice with me, please," Pedri says, getting ready to start. "If I fail, you lie and say I'm the best, okay?"
"Don't," Robert interrupts. "If he sucks you can say it outloud. Please."
"Lewa, go away."
Between laughs and jokes of the two players, you finished the rest of the day, Robert and Pedri were easy to be around.
When they finished their work, you got sent back with the other interns, saying your goodbyes to them.
🪷🪷🪷
The three weeks of helping at the club were easy.
You helped the injured guys with the water.
You helped the social media team, and you did a lot of things.
Xavi was impressed that after the first week, you wanted to keep going. He was hoping you would beg him not to take you, but instead, you were waiting for him to go first thing in the morning.
"Y/n, you will be with the first team today. The boys are helping with a project, so you will be alone."
You nod, giving her a thumbs up.
"First time alone with the big team." Marcus says. "If you want advice, do what the Mister tells you. He kinda screams at everybody when the players won't do what he says."
"I'll be frustrated, too." You say, honestly. "I mean, half of them can't even create an opportunity, and when they got an assist, they won't even do anything."
"Yes, but I think Xavi plays a big role into that. Maybe the rumors about him leaving aren't that bad after all."
You shut your mouth, not wanting to say something offensive to him. Your dad gave his heart to the team during very bad times when they could barely afford the players.
"I'm going to the field."
"Don't get defensive," he laughs. "I mean, I get that as a cule you love the old players, but Xavi is a little bit out of date. Like go home, with your wife and your perfect kids."
"Do you ever shut up?" You ask, laughing to make the situation less tense. "Let's not talk about him when we don't even know what his home life is like, and maybe don't do this at work."
"Wow, you're so uptight."
You scuff, walking with the heavy cooler to the field.
When you make it to the stairs, you notice that maybe being alone wasn't that cool. You got to get the cooler upstairs on your own.
A cooler with more than twenty bottles of water on a very large set of stairs. Great idea.
"Do you need help, new girl?"
Raphinha and Fermin got closer. A few of the players behind them.
"Hola. Yes, thank you.
"Raph, grab that side." Fermin says, lifting the left side of the cooler. "Why do they even let you get here all by yourself?"
"I think they didn't think about this part." You shrug.
The two boys helped you. You stayed a little behind due to the social media team filming them doing it.
"Y/n!" Pedri says, grabbing your shoulders. "Hey, thank you for that show recommendation. My brother and I saw it last night, and now I can't wait to go home and see more of it."
You smile at his words. Two weeks back, you exchanged numbers. You were getting closer by the day so you trusted him.
"Well, Pedri." You say, funny tone. "Hello to you too, nice evening. I'm doing so great. Thank you for asking. How are you today?" You smile.
He blushed, he knows you're joking but still feels the blush spreading onto his face.
"I'm doing good." He answers, hands intertwine behind his back. Clearly nervous. "Thank you for asking."
You wanted to keep the conversation, but you two heard Xavi calling the players to warm up.
"Venga, let's go. If not, we're both getting in trouble, me for not hydrating the team and you for not warming up enough."
He liked the way you joke, how your face had the right expression for your feelings. He liked how you treated him like a normal person and not like the footballer.
"What are you doing this weekend?" He asked, making you stop halfway on the stairs. "We have the day off. So I thought that maybe we could go out. I know this place to eat thats amazing and I think you would like it."
You can't help the smile that's on your lips. You liked him, maybe more than you care to admit.
"Looks like now I have a plan." You turn around after that, walking the remaining stairs. Little did he know that you did that for him not to notice your red face. "See you this weekend." You whisper, loud enough for him to hear.
You can tell Pedri is happy. The way he kept looking at you and sending you smiles is something else.
"Hey" you feel someone pocke you in the ribs.
When you turn, you find Marcus. Honestly, he was the last person you wanted to see. After the way he insulted your father, you didn't even want to cross words with him.
"Hey, you guys done with the project?" You ask, eyes watching the other players.
"Yeah, Martina sent us to different places, and I was sent here." He sits at the edge of the cooler. You didn't move, not wanting to have him next to you. "So, the boys and I are doing something this weekend, we were thinking about going out for some food. Would you like to come?"
"I actually have plans, but have fun." You say, very dry tone. "And let's get up, they're almost done and I need to get them some water."
Marcus was that one guy that hits on you and gets offended when you don't even look at him. But he keeps trying, trying again, and trying again.
The other boys were fine, they joke with you, they share stories, they are teammates. Marcus was just not it for you.
"I can help you with that, let me do it." He says, pulling the cooler to the middle of the field without waiting for your answer.
Xavi waved at you to get your attention from one side of the field. You walked to him, eyes turning back to the field to find those brown eyes looking at you.
"Hola, papi." You say, smiling at him. "Do you want some water?"
"I'm fine, reina." He smiles back. "Hey, meet me in my office after practice. I need to talk to you."
You nod. Not thinking much of it. He always had this mysterious behavior about talks, and in the end, it was him asking you to make a reservation at some restaurant or asking you how to send a link to Oscar.
You walked back to the team, Marcus was chatting with Raphinha, leaving the cooler abandoned.
You can't help but exhale exasperated. He was acting like he was everyone's boss. The boys tolerated it, but you didn't have to.
"Oye! I forgot to give my bottle back." You heard, making you turn. "Sorry, I was chatting."
"It's okay, are you done?"
"Actually, I wanted to ask if you have more. I threw half at Pedri." He laughs.
You laugh with him, Ferran was so comic to you. He always messed with other players. Specifically with Pedri, to the point of them not being called out when he did something to him.
"I think we have some extras." You say, checking the cooler and handing him a new bottle. "Just don't shower anymore players."
Ferran was about to answer, but a very entitled Marcus walked by and rudely asked if he was finished.
"She's waiting for me, don't worry." He says in this particular tone that makes you smirk. Marcus just shrugs and leaves. Walking down the stairs. "Is he always like that?"
"Sometimes, I think he thinks that just because he named himself the boss he actually is."
"So we don't like him?" He asks, eyebrow lifted.
"We did, but I don't think we do anymore."
"We good then." He says, making this funny expression. "Thank you. By the way, what flowers are your favorites?"
You were taken aback by the question.
"I think I don't have a favorite set of flowers." You say, thinking about an answer. "I like lilies, but they're not my favorite tho"
"Okay, good to know." He nods. "I have to get back, thanks for the water." He hands you the bottle and runs to where Pedri is.
You can't help the little smile that creeps your face. He was bringing you flowers.
You spend the rest of the training with your eyes sticked to him. The little smiles he sends you and the way Ferran notices and mock him.
When you finish with them, you decide to walk to the little room the club gives to interns. You feel the effects of the new weather coming.
"Why are you here alone?" Marcus asked you. "If you don't have anything to do, I can find something for you to do."
"No need, I have to help Misted Xavi with something." You close your little locker, trying to walk out of the room.
He grabs your arm, stopping you from walking out. "I was thinking, maybe we can hang out some time."
You kindly removed his hand from your arm, smiling so you don't seem rude. "I'm going to be honest with you." You sigh, knowing this was going to be uncomfortable. "I'm not interested. You're not my type. And no, I don't want to create a friendship with you."
The way the smirk he had is now erased from his face, making you want to laugh. Not to be mean, but he was that kind of dude that believed he was above everyone and everything.
Walking out and to your fathers' office, happy about finally letting your feelings out about the whole Marcus situation.
"Well, hello, Mister Xavi." You say, opening the door. Oscar and him are sitting on the couch of his office, Xavi with his head on his hands. "What's wrong?"
They look at each other, but Oscar decided to speak. "Nothing, we wanted to tell you that you can go home early."
You narrow your eyes, that was not something your father was used to do, having a free day? An early out? Noup.
"Papi, are you okay?" you ask, just to make sure you're good to actually go.
"Si, go before I change my mind." he half smiles. "and pick some milk on your way home". He throws the car keys on your way.
"Yes sir, see you later."
You walk fast to your locker, happy that you can leave early. You tell two of the boys that you were let go for the day and said your goodbye to Martina.
You were too busy on your phone to notice Carlos getting something inside his car trunk.
You open the car, sliding into the seat and picking a Playlist. Three bangs on the glass made you let your phone go.
You pull the window down, finding a very smiley Carlos. "Is the Uber available?"
You smile, hand on your chest to calm your heart. "Hola, what do you mean uber? You gave me a ride to the mall the other day." You joke with him.
He became your friend, he was funny and very respectful. He even shares his snacks with you. "Dude, I love your car." He takes a look at the car. "Can I drive it?"
You laugh, knowing you barely even drive it because your dad takes care of it more than he takes care of you.
"Maybe later, I have to go. I got let go."
"You got fired?" He asks, not understanding what you meant.
"No, I mean, I'm going home early. Don't throw me out just yet." You laugh. "Have fun, and don't listen to Marcus."
"I won't, drive safe." He waves as he walks away.
🪷🪷🪷
"Should I wear this or this?" You ask Nuria. She was helping you with your hair. "Or maybe another color?"
She laughs, noticing how nervous you are. "Can you calm down? You will look beautiful and this mystery guy will fall on his knees." She pats your shoulders.
"I just haven't had a date in so long. I'm rusty." You joke, changing your outfit in the closet while she organized your hair tools. "Okay, opinions." You say showing her your full outfit.
She takes your hand, making you turn. "Hermosa." She hugs you. "Maybe to make it a little casual some white sneakers?" She suggests.
You agree with her. Talking while putting your shoes on. You take a last look on your makeup and hair.
"Can you tell me who the guy is? That way, I won't be nervous about you out with a stanger." She smiles, passing you your jacket. "Or can you share your location with me? I won't tell."
"I'll share the location." You say, grabbing your phone to do it. "Plus, I'm taking your car, so if the date goes downhill, I'll come back."
"Take care, and please call me if anything. Also, don't hesitate to use the pepper spray I bought you. And have fun." She rambles, making you laugh.
You sent her a kiss as you walked out the door. You texted Pedri that you were on your way, and he texted back saying he was almost there.
You were nervous about the date, not because of Pedri but because you were scared of messing up. Plus, he didn't know who you really are.
You park, walking to the host and telling her Pedri's second last name, he uses that name yo avoid people finding he's there. Even tho you'll only need to know the barca team and recognize him.
"Hola." You say, hands on his shoulders. He jumped a little. "Sorry, didn't meant to scare you."
"You didn't, hola." He hugs you, turning to grab the bouquet of flowers. "This is for you. Hope you like them."
Lilies.
Just like you told Ferran.
"Thank you, this is so cute." You smile. When you grab the back of the chair to move it. He does it for you. "Gracias, Pedri." You smile at him.
"You look preciosa." He thinks outloud. When he notice the blush on your cheeks and how you are avoiding his gaze. It's when he notice he said that and not only thought it.
"I like your hair today, I like it when you don't blow dry it." You joke with him.
You two joke a little, ordering some food. He recommended you a dish a d a drink, you let him do the ordering.
"This is so good."
"I knew you would like it." He smiles. "How is your dish?"
"Delicious, want a bite?" You ask, and before he could answer you, you grab some of it with your fork. "Open your mouth."
"Fuaa." He says, head thrown back. "That's great. Taste mine."
He repeats your action, feeding you with his food for you to taste it. "Yummy." You smile.
You two talk a about your hobbies, your music taste. Random things you would talk about, nothing crazy.
"And my parents have a restaurant, so mom cooked the croquettes for me all the time." He tells you the story of his favorite food. "And now I miss it cause I want it but I can't have it like I used to."
"I never had croquettes in my life." You confess. "I like seafood. In Brazil, I used to eat a lot of shrimp and fish. Loveeeee fish."
"Why did you come back?" He asks. "Or are you from there?"
"I was born here, actually." You began the story. "But my parents separated when I was seven, and my mom took us to Brazil two years later."
"So you spent most of your life in Brazil?"
"It's complicated. My dad and mom got into a custody battle, and I was with her from nine to fifteen. Then I was forced to come back but only for a few months cause I was sent to a boarding school in Switzerland."
"And how did you end as a intern imfor Barça?"
"My dad forced me. He was teaching me a lesson. And he knows Martina, so it was easy."
"Oh." He says. He was speechless at how crazy your life sounds. "If I can say something, I'm glad you are here."
You smile, "Thank you, I'm happy I'm back, and I'm happy to be here with you."
It's his time to blush. He really likes you. Without Ferran's encouragement, he would have never asked you out. He was nervous and awkward about it.
"Do you want dessert?" He asks, noticing you finish your drink. "Other drink?"
"You want me full tonight, sir." You laugh, making him laugh. "I'll have some if you do."
"You are making me break my diet." He laughs. "Fine, let's get those desserts."
The rest of the dinner was fine. You two had fun talking and telling stories of things that happened to you as kids.
"Are you sure you don't want to split the bill?" You ask one more time.
"Not at all, it's on me, you did your part whe you got pretty for this." He smiles.
The blush that creeps into your cheeks is crazy. You can feel your whole face burning up from the feeling.
"Did you drive here?"
"Yes, don't worry. Thank you very much for this." You hug him. "Can we do this again? I really want to see you again."
He's taken aback from your honesty. He likes that. "Si, I want that too." He smiles. "Do you like going to the movies?"
"Love doing that."
"Want to go to the movies to see this new Ryan Gosling movie?" He walks you to your car.
"Si, text me the details." You hug him again. "Popcorn is on me," you say, kissing his cheek. You enter your car. He was kinda petrifie. Hee wanted to react. "Pedri," you call him.
He comes back to the real world. "Si, bonita?"
"Tell me when you are home." You say, pulling up your window.
He waited to be in his car to freak out about how you kissed his cheek and how you asked him on a second date.
He drives home happy, ready to call Ferran and tell him all about it. How you liked the lilies, how you enjoyed food, and how you even have a second date.
When you got home, Nuria and you went to your room and you told her everything, showed her your bouquet of flowers and even told her that you have a second date with him.
🪷🪷🪷
Your situationship with Pedri was better than you expected. It's been an ongoing this for a few months now. It's the perfect time to get to know him and for him to get to know you.
You two meet up after club hours. You even began going to some of the games to support him.
As a joke, Ferran gave you a shirt with his number. Making you and Pedri laugh. You use it because it makes Pedri smile every time he watches you there, knowing you follow Ferran and his crazy idea.
Carlos knows about you and Pedri. He's your friend, you trusted him with the information and he asked you in exchange a bag of gummy bears to not tell.
He wears Pedris number for you. And he became friends with Pedri and Ferran. You four are like a nice group.
You were organizing the water closet with Carlos. Talking about music and about this new show that he's seeing.
"And this girl, she's the starting." He explains. "She has a secret romance with one of the higher-ups. Just like you." He pokes you.
"Want me to give you a speaker so you can say it louder?" You hit his arm lightly.
"Are you going on a date with him tonight?"
"I am. We are going to watch something, probably."
"If you watch the movie I recommend you. Please do a review without spoilers for me tomorrow." He says, passing you a bottle of Gatorade.
Marcus was hearing the conversation. Martina sent him to grab you for a quick meeting. But he couldn't help but hear your conversation.
"Are you coming to the game this weekend?" You ask. "He wants me here, and I don't want to be alone."
"Are you getting me popcorn?"
"Yes." You say, laughing and rolling your eyes. "I dont know if I'm nervous because this game can get us La Liga or because his family may be there."
"Maybe both?"
"Si, maybe both." You say, finishing with the work. "We are done."
Marcus hears this and walks like he just got there.
"Hey guys, sorry to interrupt. Martina wants us to have a quick meeting." He smiles. "I thought you were organizing the equipment."
"No, we are here today." Carlos answers. "Let's go."
Marcus was curious. Who was the person you were "dating." Probably someone married if you are talking about his family being there.
After the meeting, you got a text from your dad, asking you to come to his office to talk about something.
"Hola pare, em necessitaves?" (Hi dad, did you need me?) You speak to him in catalan.
"Hola, Reina." He hugs you. "How's work?"
"Good, I restocked the water closet. We have fresh water bottles. And I had a meeting about a thing Martina wants us to do."
"Great, that's fine."
You squinted your eyes. He was up to something. "Dad, anything you want to ask me or tell me?"
He rolls his eyes. "Can't a father make conversation with his firstborn?"
"Xavier?"
"Promise me you won't be mad at Asia."
You know what is coming. You heavily exhale. "Go on."
"A little bird, named Asia. Told me you are dating someone."
"Dad, this is work." You laugh. "Plus, I'm not."
You were honest, Pedri, and you weren't dating. You were acquaintances who happened to enjoy each others company.
"Okay." He laughs. "We can play the we are at work thing."
You don't notice how the door is open, thinking everybody is doing something more important than walking around.
But Marcus wasn't. He was walking around trying to find Oscar to talk to him about being able to go to the game for free as a part of the club workers. But when he heard your voice and Xavi's, he stayed.
"I wanted to tell you this when we were at dinner, but I feel like I can do it. I'm going to the game." You tell him.
Your dad loves it when you come to his games. It makes him think of you as a little girl wearing his jersey.
"Nuria and the kids are coming too."
"The kids too?" You ask, confused. "Don't they have to go with their grandparents?"
Marcus raises his eyebrows. His wife and kids are coming. You and him will have dinner together.
Then it clicks, you were talking about Xavi. And Carlos knew about you and him.
"Anyways, I have to go." You say, getting up and walking to his mini fridge. "I'm taking one of your special drinks. After all, I earn it."
You two laugh, you hug your father. "Back to work. I don't want my father to find out I'm not working." You joke.
"I'm sure he won't mind. You are with the Mister, he will understand."
"Yeah, you don't know him." You tease him. "But you'll like him, maybe we can arrange a meeting, sir."
"Go to work, reina." He laughs, shaking his head while he does it.
Marcus hides in an office, waiting a few minutes before going out. He was mind blowned, you were having something with Xavi.
He walks back to the comune corridors. Not paying attention to his surroundings, the only thing in his mind was this new information.
For you, it was all flowers, dreams, happy days.
You get to see the person you like every day, you get to spend at least a little bit of time with him.
"Stop, you need to train." You say to pedri, who's too busy kissing you and hugging you. "Pepi, stop it." You giggle.
"Why?" He pouts. "One more, and I'm leaving."
"No, guapo." You try to push him. But he brings you back to him. "You are going to be late." You say.
He grabs your cheeks, kissing you goodbye. You hug his body. Loving the way this feels. The way his lips dance with yours and the way your tongues mix just makes sense.
When he separates to take air, you place your hand on top of his mouth. Blocking him from kissing you again.
"You have to go." You whisper breathlessly. "The Mister will be mad at you."
He kisses the top of your forehead. Eying the clock on the wall. He really needs to go. "I'll see you tonight?" You nod, still catching your breath. "Okay, I'll see you then" He kiss your cheek and pulls away.
You wait a few minutes before coming out of where you two were hiding. Walking to the interns room.
Marcus was there. He eyed you from head to toes. "Hello." You say. He only smiled. He still had a bone to pick with you from the way you rejected him.
"So, are you coming to the game?" He asks.
"Yeah, I got tickets. Are you?"
"Don't know, still deciding."
You nod, not wanting to keep the conversation. You walk over and find Carlos waiting with the coolers with you.
"Can you be more late?" He plays with you.
"Shut up and work bitch." You joke.
"Hmmm." He shakes his head. "Says the one who was tonguing her boyfriend on the janitors closet."
"I hate you." You side eye him. He laughs and walks away with a cooler. "And he's not my boyfriend." You whisper to him as you enter the field.
"Okay." He pauses, thinking. "Your fuck buddy?"
"He's not my-" You hit his arm. "He's not my fuck buddy." You whisper.
"So you haven't fuck him?"
You blush at the question. You did sleep with him, but he wasn't your fuck buddy or anything like that.
"So you did fuck him." Carlos laughed. "If he is not your boyfriend then you are fuck buddies until he asks you out formally."
You stayed quiet for the duration of the training. Until it was time to offer the guys some water. Carlos was right. He wasn't your boyfriend, but you were having sex and doing things couples do.
"Let's go."
You walk over to the guys with the vest. It was easy that way, since they all stayed together to plan a strategy.
You are thinking still. They players are grabbing their waters and talking to themselves. You turn your head to the other part of the team.
Pedri was looking at you, you smile at him. Ferran sees this and decides to tease him. The others think it is just him playing, but it was more than that.
"Distracted much?" Raphinha asks, smiling at you. "You okay?"
You nod. "Just thinking." You say honestly.
"Don't tire your mind." Lewandowski says.
"Easy for you to say, you can take your thoughts away by playing."
"A piece of advice, if it can be solved then you don't have to worry about it. Think about how you are going to solve it and do it."
"And if it doesn't have a solution?" You ask Lewa.
"Then don't think about it." He smiles again. "If you can fix it, learn from it and move on."
You nod, thanking him for the advice. "More water before I go?" You ask, hearing Oscar blow the whistle.
"Noup." He throws the bottle back into the cooler.
You go on with the day, not thinking much of the situation. It has a solution, and you can resolve it.
You sit next to your dad for dinner. Texting pedri carefully that as soon as dinner is over, you will meet him up.
"I can't wait to see you at the game. I have a good feeling about it."
You smile, letting him and Nuria do the talking. You eat some pieces of your food, feeling nauseous and tired.
"What's going on with you?" Xavi asks. "You are not the type to leave food."
Before you answer, Asia decides to intervene. "She has the love syndrome."
Both Asia and Dan decide to make kiss noises and throw jokes at you about your love life.
"Stop it, kids." Nuria laughs. "Are you okay?"
"Si." You nod. "Just tired. Maybe I'm coming with a cold." You lie.
"Then take a seat next to the dog because I don't want to get a cold too." You dad jokes. Getting up to take his plate to the sink.
You roll your eyes. "Can I use your car? I want to visit Karlie." You lie again.
"No drinking and driving." He says, stern tone. "Please don't come back at like three in the morning." He throws the keys at you.
You nod, taking your plate to the sink and going upstairs to brush your teeth. You fix your hair before going back down. "Bye, I'll be here in a bit."
You arrive at his house. You two meet up there because you haven't revealed that your father is Xavi Hernández.
He kisses you hello and takes you to his room. He has some candy and Amazon Prime open for you to pick any movie you want.
The movie goes unnoticed by you. The words of Carlos and Lewandowski are taking all your mind. You grab the controller, pausing the movie.
"What are we?" You ask, very straightforward.
Pedri chokes on his gummy bear. "Qué?"
"What are we?" You repeat. Louder this time.
He's trying to think about what to say. He doesn't even know what you two are. You have no labels.
"Are we just fuck-buddies?" You ask.
"No." He quickly answers. "You are more than just that." He says.
"What more?"
He tries to find the right words. He doesn't want you to feel scared if he confesses all his feelings for you.
And he also doesn't want to run when maybe you want to walk. He wants to make you feel comfortable.
"I want us to be more than just friends." He says.
"We are." You say, serious tone. "We fuck, we kiss, we cuddle in bed while we watch a movie, you introduce me to your brother."
"Listen, Y/n." He sits. "I want more than that. I just thought that maybe you would be more comfortable like that."
"Why?"
"Huh?" He's confused. What do you mean why?
"Why did you think that?"
"I'm a footballer." He spat. "And to be honest, a Google search will show you that the media thinks I'm a fucking womanizer. Girls here and there when, in reality, I don't even go out to get groceries."
You smirk at that. He was a very home orienteded guy. "I don't believe in rumors, I believe you."
"And I'm happy about it." He grabs your hand and kisses it. "I like you a lot. You are not just someone I have sex with and then leave. I do want more."
You grab his face, kissing him. You wanted more than just friendship too. You wanted to move forward with the relationship.
"Ask me then." You smile.
He laughs, if there's something he loves about you is how straightforward you are. You are not afraid of saying anything.
"Y/n, preciosa mía." His arms hug your waist. "Will you honor me by letting me be your boyfriend?" He smiles, eyes shining.
You smile too, watching every detail about his face, the way his smile is reaching his eyes, the way his hair looks, the way he smells.
"Let me think about it." You joke, making him pull you down to the bed with him.
"Preciosa, venga, no bromees." He kiss you.
"I will honor you." You say, smiling like crazy. "I really like you too, and I'm happy right now." You laugh, grabbing his cheeks and kissing him.
You two spend the rest of the movie like that, kissing here and there, paying more attention to each other than to the movie.
"Wear my jersey to the game." He requests. "I want my girlfriend to wear my number on her back. It will be like a motivation."
You nod, smiling at him. You were planning on wearing it anyway. You wanted him to notice how much support he has on you.
You checked the time, it was past midnight. "I have to go. My dad will be pissed if I don't."
"No." He hugs you, getting on top of you. "Stay here."
You laugh. "Pepi, if I don't get home as soon as possible, I don't think I'll be allowed to go to the game anymore."
He sighs, kissing you quickly before letting go. He walks with you to your car. "Call me when you are home and drive safe."
"I always do." You say cocky, making him smile. His head gets in the car for him to be able to kiss you. "Adiós."
🪷🪷🪷
The game wasn't as good as you expected. The team lost, and with the loss, they gave Real Madrid the Liga trophy. Now there's only hopes for the second place.
Xavi was mad, you can tell by the look on his face and how he stormed out to the dressing room.
You knew this was a bad moment to the players. They all look sad and stressed. But you can't blame Xavi. They don't even work as a team anymore.
Carlos and you walk into the tunnel. You had access to those areas due to the security guys recognizing you from working there.
You wanted to wait to at least talk to Pedri, check if he's fine in person, and not over text. "I'll wait here. If you want to you can go."
"Okay, see you tomorrow then." You kiss his cheek goodbye.
You sat in one of the benches at the corridor. Checking your phone to see what people are saying on X.
You feel angry at how people blame your father. He wishes to be able to go into the field and play for them but he can't.
After all, he was a barça legend, and they are just teenagers and adults acting like five years old who can't make a team with the others.
Goundogan and Araujo fighting. Ter Stegen is saying Xavi doesn't need to call out players after losing a game. It was a shit show.
You heard the dressing room opening. Your father walks mad, his belongings in hand. You stand up and try to talk with him.
"Not right now." He says, deep mad voice.
You only nodded, taking a seat at the bench again. You want to do more, but you can't even begin expressing how much you this situation hurts you.
Some of the players began leaving. Some waving goodbye to you. Thinking you are there as a job and not just to watch the match.
Ferran walks out, head low and earphones in. You grab his shoulder. "Hey." You say even tho he can't hear you.
He takes his earphones out to greet you. "Hey." He sighs. "What a shit show, isn't it?" He laughs.
"It's okay, it's just a bad moment." You hug him and say goodbye to him.
"Pedri is inside, he's taking a shower."
You text him telling him that you were waiting for him. You walk to the interns room to pick something from your locker.
After all, that was one of the only rooms that didn't have a lock. You walk and see Marcus and Raphinha talking.
They both look at you, but Raphinha's gaze was a weird one. You can't pick it. Maybe it was his humor after the lost.
"I just want something from my locker." You walk quick and open it. "Sorry about the lost, Raph." You say, pulling the item and closing the locker door. "Bye."
Pedri texted you to meet him at the parking lot. He was out of the dressing room and walking over there.
You do as he told you. Meeting him there. He was inside his car, doing something on his phone.
You knock on his window. He opens the passenger seat door for you. "Hola." You whisper, not sure how to approach him.
"Xavi told us he's leaving." He confess. "And my family couldn't come."
"Pepi." You sigh. Hugging him and kissing his cheek. "I'm so sorry about today. If it makes you feel better, I think you played better than anyone else." You kiss his nose. Making him smile.
"Thank you for being here." He poses his head on your shoulder. "Want to go get something to eat? I feel like having something bad." He laughs.
"Whatever you want, guapo." You kiss him. Hands squishing his cheeks. "Let's go."
Yourusername has added to her story
"I feel like this season is just too much for us." He says, eating his fries. "We are falling apart."
"The whole Ronald and Gundo thing is just dumb, I will take Gundo's advice. He was in ManCity and they are champions."
"But I can't blame him. Maybe the delivery wasn't the best." He says, thinking about the situation. "And I think Xavi and Oscar weren't doing their best."
"What are they doing wrong?" You ask curious. He was one of the few playes that did what Xavi and Oscar asked him to do. "I mean for what I see at the training, he is giving instruction, explaining how to create opportunities and then at the game Lewandowski and Raphinha do the opposite."
Pedri wasn't surprised at your football talk, he find it amazing when you first gave him advice, and now he asks for feedback.
"You have the most assists this season of La Liga, and the majority of those were lost opportunities. At this point, the only thing that can save you guys is if Oscar and Xavi get in the field with you during the games."
"Bueno, if you put it like that, then yes." He scratched his head. "That water job of yours is giving you too much to fight me for." He laughs
"It's not my fault I can take the instructions better than your teammates." You laugh back. "But I know Xavi thinks you are one of the best elements of the team." You say, head over his shoulder.
You weren't lying. Your father was happy with him, maybe wanting to correct little things, but seeing the big picture, he was the perfect successor of Andres."
"I'll believe you." He kisses you. "Want me to drop you home?" He says, finishing his meal.
"My stepmother will pick me up from your home, she's just a few blocks away."
You still have to tell Pedri about your dad. When he told you that Xavi announced the possibility of leaving, you already knew.
He talked about it with Nuria and your siblings. Letting you know before anyone else, LaPorta, the players, the press.
"Why do I feel like you don't want me to know where you live?" He asks, curious about why his house was the only place you two meet.
"I do, it's just complicated."
"You dad doesn't know we are together?"
"He knows I'm with someone, but right now, he's dealing with work issues." You didn't lie. He was. Pedri knows but he doesn't know he knows.
"Okay, I trust you." He says, resting his hand on your thigh.
You texted Nuria, letting her know that you will be at his place in about five minutes, for her to pick you up.
Just like Pedri, Nuria didn't know the reality of your relationship. She thinks he is someone you met around, maybe at a party. Not a player from your father's team.
When you get the text saying she's outside, you stand up, ready to leave. "She's here, adiós, guapo."
But he has other plans. He stood up, grabbed your wrist and walked to the door with you.
"I want to say hi." He says. Walking hand in hand with you, happy to be able to meet someone from your life.
You stop, he will recognize Nuria if he sees her. "Pedri, no." You pull him to you before he reaches the door. "My stepmother is kinda delicate."
"Y/n, be honest." He frowns. "Tell me if you don't want me to meet your family. You know my brother and I want you to know my parents."
You think for a moment, you do want him to meet Nuria and your father. Not like his trainer, just as your father.
"The thing is, I'm planning a dinner with my family and you. And I want it to be perfect and for you to meet them calmly and not at the street."
"You promise is that?" He pouts.
"Let's do this. You have three days off for the next match that is on Friday. Let's do the dinner on Saturday so you don't stress about the game. Deal?"
He smiles, nodding excited about the idea. "Deal." He says, hugging you. "I was so scared of you being embarrassed of me or something."
"What?" You laugh. "Eres tan tonto, it's not that. You know that now."
He nods. Kissing your lips. "Go, she will get mad from waiting."
You kiss him again. Telling him a quick goodbye. When you get to the car, Nuria is watching you all smiles.
"What?" You ask her.
"Nothing I just love seeing you so happy, I'm a fan." She laughs, making you laugh. "I need you to tell me when are we meeting him."
"You are lucky, I invite him on Saturday, so your job is to keep my dad happy." You joke.
"Well, I have all morning to make him feel less angry if the game goes downhill."
"Let's hope it doesn't." You beg.
🪷🪷🪷
You can't deny you will miss working at the club when the season is done. You learned to like the job and you have fun with the guys, even with Marcus.
"I'm going to miss organizing this and stealing Gatorade." Carlos says. Drinking the last bit of the drink.
"Can't you get one at the store?" You joke.
"It will not be free. Duh!"
"You want to know what else is free?" You ask. When he nods you get close to him. "Our labor here." You whisper.
He laughs so hard that some of the players that are walking past to the camp turn to see you. "I want to know the joke, tio." Sergi jokes. "Also, if you can pack a purple Gatorade, I'll really appreciate it."
You pass the training talking about random things. Pedri was looking at you from time to time.
He told you how a little anxious about meeting your family. You were too, you hoped he would understand your reasoning.
"I don't know how you two haven't been caught. He can't keep his eyes away from you." He says, noticing how the canary looks at you every five seconds. "But to be honest, when we first started every player was looking at you."
"Maybe that's why they don't allow female interns." You laugh.
You finish the training between jokes. The few last trainings were always the best. The vacation spirit was hitting the players.
You returned both coolers. When you were about to leave, you saw Raphinha reclined into the doorfr. "Hello to you too, kitty girl."
"Hola." You say. "Do you want something?"
"Can't a man just get a talk?" He jokes.
You nod. "How are you?"
"I can be better." He walks closer, maybe a little too much for your liking. "I want to ask you something." When you don't answer, he decides to keep talking. "I got told a little story about you. And I'm interested in it."
You narrow your eyes, nodding your head to indicate him continue with the story.
"I know how hard it must be to work as hard as you do, with all this ahit show, organizing stupid bottles. Look, I don't blame you for what you do here. But someone as pretty as you can get better things from someone like me. No need to fuck old flesh for some cash." He says, posing his hands on your waist.
You push him away, "What the fuck are you even implying?" You have a stern tone. "Don't ever touch me again. You are disgusting."
"Such a prude now, huh?" He laughs. "We all know what you do. It's no secret. I'm just taking my chances to be the next one in line." He tries to get closer again. "I can fuck you better than him, let's be honest."
Your hand hurts from how hard you hit his cheek. Making his face turn. "Você é uma pessoa nojenta, fique longe de mim." (You are such a disgusting person, get away from me), you say, pushing him to get out of the room.
His hand grabs your arm. Pulling you back. "Você age como uma puritana, mas você é uma prostituta." (You act like a prude but you're a whore)
"You have a wife and a child." You remind him. "And you are here accusing me of something I don't even know about. You are disgusting."
"I'm not the one fucking someone from the club." He laughs. "You are."
"I held your son while Natalia, your wife, was using the bathroom. She was telling everybody how happy she was that she was visiting. And you act as if she's nothing. You dont deserve her." You say, taking his hands off of your body, "I'm telling you this only once. So you better listen. Don't mess with me because I'm not the one. You have no idea the kind of power I have. Stay away from me, or I'm telling everybody what you did."
He lifts his hands. Looking at you with a mad stare. You feel like crying, but you won't in front of him. "Move, deixe-me ir." (Let me go)
He moves to the side. You run, wanting to go home. You go to the interns room, searching for you things in your locker.
Your hands are shaking. You can't even get the key into the lock. Three knocks on the door got unnoticed by you.
"Hey, Y/n?" You heard Ferran's voice. "Are you okay?"
He walks over to you, and he places his hands on your arm and back, but you back up. "Don't touch me." You shout at him, moving away from his touch.
You don't mean to do it, but you can't even think straight. "It's okay, deep breaths." He says, hands motioning you to take a breath. "Yeah, that's it. Do it again." He says, he backs a little from where you are.
You take a few breaths, feeling yourself calming down. You hated the feeling of being uncappable of defending yourself.
"That's it." Ferran cheers you. "Here, I have a napkin on me. Don't ask." He hands you the napkin. You smile at his joke.
"I'm sorry for shouting." You say, voice shaking. "I just, I want to go home." You whisper, feeling the tears fill your eyes.
"Can I come closer and give you a hug?" He asks, you nod. He hugs you, one hand on your shoulders and the other on your head, pushing it against his chest. "I don't know what happened, but if you need a friend. I'm here."
You hug him back. You really needed a hug. "Gracias." You say, "Where did you get the napkin, tho?"
"I hide a cookie." He confess. That makes you laugh a little. "Hey, you laughed."
You separate from him. "Thank you, Ferran." You smile. He asked you for the key to the locker, opening the lock for you.
You grab your things. And he locked it again. "Do you need want to go? I can call you an Uber, I don't have my phone but it's in the dressing room. In my station."
You smile. Shaking your head. "I just need to find Martina and tell her I'm leaving." You say, walking to out of the door with him. "Hey, you wanted something. Can I help you before I leave?"
Ferran feels sad. You grow a friendship with him. You are someone very calm, and he can tell something might have happened for you to react the way you did.
"Don't be silly. Let's find Martina."
"It's okay, I know where she is. Thank you for helping me. I'll go by myself."
"You sure?"
You nod, giving him one last hug. "Bye."
You walk to the office where Martina is, she's always there with the social media manager. You knock to see if she was there.
"Come in."
You open the door, finding Raphinha talking with her. Both of them laughing and joking about something.
"Hey, is everything alright?" She asks when she sees your red face. "What happened?"
You lock eyes with Raphinha, he has a smirk, like if the situation was funny to him. You want to grab your bag and hit him.
"Si, I just want to know if I can leave early. I don't feel well and I want to go home."
"Oh honey, is there something I can help you with?"
"Si, can we help you?" He asks.
"It's just an allergy reaction, and I feel like I should probably rest a little." You lie, looking at Raphinha while doing it with a disgusted face.
"Go home and rest, if you want to, don't come tomorrow. I have those reactions, too, and it's the worst."
"Will do, thank you for understanding. Goodbye." You wave at her, walking outside the door, but you turn to say something."Oh, Raphinha."
"Si?"
"Lembre-se do que eu lhe disse. Fique longe de mim." (Remember what I told you. Stay away from me.) You smile. "Been practicing my Portuguese." You say to Martina, who smiles at you, not understanding anything you just said.
You went home, thankful that Nuria was out at an event, and you can cry in peace in your room. You turn your phone off, not wanting to deal with anything and just staying in bed until you have the strength to get up.
Ferran told Pedri what happened, the way he found you. He called you five times and texted you another few more. But nothing. You were mia.
He spent the rest of training worried about you. He wanted to know what happened for you to be crying and left early.
Once he's home, he can concentrate on anything, checking his phone every minute to see if the message was delivered.
That's when he remembered, you sent him over text your address for the dinner with your parents. Telling him that you did it because later on, you would forget.
He grabs his keys and drives over to your house. He didn't care if he looked imprudent. He needed to make sure you were okay.
"Y/n, are you sure you don't want to talk?" Nuria asks again. She can't help but wonder why your eyes were puffy and you were sad. "I won't tell."
"It's nothing." You answer. "I'm just taking a shower, just in time to eat dinner with you. Deal?"
"Okay, if you need me, I'm here." She hugs you. "I'm going to get some takeout, I feel like that will make you feel better."
You nod, thanking her and closing your bathroom door and taking a very hot shower. You needed that. You bring your alexa to the bathroom and ask her to play something while you shower.
Pedri was impatient, the traffic was making him bounce his knee. He wanted to be able to just drive over all these people.
He tries to call you one more time, with no answer. Your phone was still off. He wanted to know if you were okay. Just that.
"Y/n?" Asia asks, knocking on your door. "When mom returns, we will make your favorite brownies to make you feel better."
You smile, you know they want you to be okay no matter what happened. "Thank you, A. I'll help you. Just let me change, and I'll go to the kitchen."
You change into some bikers and a plain shirt. Or as you like to call it, your lazy outfit. You dry your hair, not wanting to deal with the freez later.
While your blow dryer is on and alexa is playing something in the bathroom. Xavi and Nuria got home.
"Marcela told me that it was an allergic reaction. That's what she said."
"I think there's more. Plus, she looks fine, not a single red mark on her face from allergies. Maybe talk to her later."
You finish with your hair. You wait for Nuria to be back or call you to go down. You charge your phone even though it's off.
You put your hair in a ponytail, completing the lazy look with your sleepers from a hotel that you went to a few years ago.
While you wait in your bed, Pedri drives into the community where you live, the security guy recognized him and asked for a photo.
He let him go past the gate since he was a known person. Thing that makes him laugh. He follows the gps to your street.
He parks in front of what he thinks is the right house. He walks over to the door and ring the doorbell.
"Xavi, please open the door. I'll go get the kids." Nuria says, walking upstairs.
Xavi walks to the door. When he opens it, he finds Pedri. "Pedri, tío. What are you doing here?"
Pedri is as confused as his trainer. He doesn't understand what happened and how he ended at Xavi's house.
"Hey, Mister. I think I got my gps confused. But it's nice to see you. Sorry about the press thing today. We were all confused and mad."
"It's okay, you guys worry too much about me." He laughs. "Venga, come inside." He moves for the midfielder to get in. "Are you hungry? We are about to eat."
"I don't mean to bother." He smiles. "I think when Lewandowski sent us the address to your home for lunch, it got overlapped with the one I was looking for."
"Happens to me all the time." He laughs, making Pedri laugh. "But you don't bother, honestly. Have some dinner with us."
Pedri agrees. He thinks this is a bad coincidence, but he will use it to maybe talk with Xavi before he leaves. Thank him for everything.
"Pedri, this is Nuria, my wife." He introduces him to his wife. "Nuria, this is Pedri. He's number eight. A good kid. I invited him over."
"Hola, that's so great. Please take a seat. Our kids will be with us in a moment."
"I'm sorry about coming without notice. I got the address wrong. I was looking for someone who lives in the same neighborhood."
The sound of children interrupts the talk. "Mom, did you get the brownie stuff?"
"Asia, come here, baby. This is Pedri. He is a football player at the club." The little girl waves.
"Do you work with dad?"
"I do." He smiles. "He's the best, you are lucky yo have such an amazing dad."
"He's cool." She says, looking at xavi. But he's not allowed to make brownies with us. He burns them."
"Are you making brownies?" Pedri asks. Trying to make conversation with her. "That's yummy."
"Yes, it's for my sister. She's feeling blue."
"That means you are a very nice sister. I have a brother named Fernando. When I'm blue, he hits me in the head." He makes the little girl laugh.
"My other two are somewhere in the house." Xavi explains. "Actually, how old are you?"
"I'm twenty-one."
"My oldest is twenty. Almost the same." He passes the plate to Pedri. "You probably recognize her. She's helping at the club."
"Really?" He asks, confused. "Didn't know that."
The laughs of a boy can be heard. Pedri is trying to remember if he knows who Xavi's daughter is.
"Reina, come here." Xavi says, waving you to come over.
You have your brother in your arms, laughing with him. "Yes, sir?" You ask, laughing.
Pedri feels how his body tenses at the sound of your voice. And you stop laughing once you see him sitting at the table.
"Pedri, this is Y/n and Dan. She works as an intern. She helped us with the water and stuff. "Y/n, I think you already know Pedri."
"I do." You say, putting your brother down, your eyes never leaving his. "Hi, Pedri."
"We know Pedri, he plays for barça." Dan says, making Pedri smile at him.
"Well, everybody got food. Let's sit down and eat." Nuria says, leaving the salad on the table. "Hey, you feeling better?"
You nod at her question. You wanted Pedri to find out about your dad but not like this. Not after the day you have.
"Y/n, take a seat." Asia asks
The only plate left was in the seat next to Pedri. You sit down, he looks at you. You are not sure what the emotions his eyes are showing are.
Xavi asks Pedri different things, talking about his family. He met Pedri's parents during one celebration at the club.
"So you two know each other?" Nuria asks Pedri and you.
You look over at him. "We do." You answer. You can see his smile. "When I got to the club, he was training after an injury, and I was assigned to be the water girl for that training." You smile.
"Yes, she was very shy and weird the first day." He laughs, making you laugh. "When she got moved to the whole team, the first times she just left the cooler and moved."
"I did not." You say. "Ferran and him were throwing water at each other." You say to Nuria. "I was scared of getting wet."
"I can admit I once used her as a shield." He laughs. "It was funny."
Nuria looks between you two. The way you smile at each other and they way you look at him.
The dinner went well. Pedri and Dan clicked in a way that any other guest at your house ever did. Asia invited him to make the brownies with you. Uninviting Nuria from the equation.
"Y/n, can you help me with something?" She calls you. You were searching for the ingredient.
"Si. Dan, please help me with the ingredients, okay baby?" You gave him the list of things.
Nuria and you walk into the laundry room. "Okay, confess." She says. Looking at you with narrowed eyes.
"What?" You asks, confused about what she's talking about. "Context, please?"
"I have a theory." She began. "Is that you are overly friendly with Pedri, and you are ten times more clingy and needy with your boyfriend. Or that we are going to see Pedri again at the dinner this Saturday, but not as the Barca Player but as your boyfriend."
You stayed quiet. Your silence was all she needed to confirm it. You just blush at how obvious you were.
"I also think it's important for you to know that he didn't know until today that Xavi is my dad."
"Y/n." She says, eyes widening. "How?"
"I asked Martina to omit the fact that my last name is Hernández because I wanted to just not be Xavi's daughter for once. I wanted to be me."
"I get it, believe me." She hugs you. "Oh my God, I'm so happy, you two look amazing together."
"You think dad would flip if I tell him that he is my boyfriend and that the job he got me to keep me occupied worked, but my occupation is not only being an intern but having a boyfriend?" You ramble a little.
"Why don't you tell him now?" She asks. "He's here. He likes him, and to be honest, I don't want to get all dressed up for something we already did but didn't know we were doing."
Nuria and you debate a little about the whole telling your dad thing. She encouraged you to tell him now that he is in a good mood.
"Hey." You say, walking back into the kitchen. "Can I talk to you? Nuria will help them." You guide them to your backyard. Seating on the couch you have there for parties. "I'm sorry I was gone all day, I just had a rough day and wanted to come home."
"Something happened?" He asks, worried. "You don't usually turn your phone off and walk out of the club."
"I don't want to talk about it, don't worry. I'm better now." You smile. "I'm sorry about not being fully honest with you." You say, referring to your family situation. "I honestly thought I was getting out of that job in two weeks, but I grew a like for it."
"And you stayed." He finish your sentence. "You tend to do toxic things. Have you noticed that?"
"Eres un tonto." You say. He opens his arms to you. You fall into them and snuggle your face on his shoulder. "Don't be mad?"
"Am not, I was shocked when your dad opened the door. I thought I was going crazy and that my car gps was failing." He chuckles. "Then I see you walking as he says you are his daughter, and all I'm thinking is now it makes sense why you know so much about football."
You laugh. "And all those things I told yo about him liking you more than the rest because you listen to him? You now can actually believe me."
He hugs you tight. He was so worried all day about you. "Ferran was worried. He didn't even bother me during training."
"You are welcome." You joke. "I was thinking, maybe we can use this opportunity to tell my dad about us."
"Don't you think it's enough off a surprise that I knocked on the door without an invitation?"
You were about to answer when a voice makes you turn. It was your dad on the balcony right above where you are.
"Creo que ya me lo han dicho sin decirme, chavales." (I think you told me without telling me, kids) he shakes his head. "Pedri, not only as your trainer but as the father of the girl you are apparently with. I think it's time to go home and rest for the game."
"Si, Mister." He shyly smiles. "Thank you for the food. See you tomorrow." He separates. "See you tomorrow, Guapa." He whispers as he walks back inside the house.
"Dad, that wasn't nice."
"Bring me a brownie when they are ready, we need to have a chat." He winks at you. Going back inside.
🪷🪷🪷
The game went amazing. They won second place on La Liga. It wasn't the worst, after all. Pedri scored two goals, giving a very nice almost end of the season.
"It was a good game." Carlos says. "I'm going to miss this so much."
"Me too, I like some of the players already, and I'm going to miss seeing you steal Gatorade for the gym."
"Shhh, I can't get caught." He jokes. You walk over to the interns room. "Wait, I'll go to the bathroom. Can you pick my stuff for me?"
You nod, opening your palm so he can give you his locker key. When he does, you walk to the room. You walk inside, grabbing your bag and Carlos things.
You text Pedri congratulations, and you tell him where you are. He asked you to wait for him there. Ferran and him will meet you there.
You heard the door slam closed. You turn and see Marcus. He has this smirk on his lips. "Hey, did you enjoy the game?" You ask, going back to your phone.
"I know what you are doing." He says, sitting at the table. "You can stop pretending."
"Qué?" You ask, confused. "What are you talking about?"
"I heard you talking with Carlos, telling him about your date, how his family was going to be there. And then I saw you walking out of that shithole, after being with him."
"Okay?" You smirk. "Why is that your concern?"
You didn't mind if he saw you and Pedri sneaking out here and there. You weren't going to hide it. Season is about to finish, and you won't be back.
"So you admit it?" He asks loudly. "I mean not that you are hiding it. Look at that Miu Miu bag. A girl like would only dream about it."
You look down at your bag. Bag that was a gift from your grandparents. "Why are you so mad if I wear designer or if I date someone from the club?" You were about to walk out, not feeling like listening to his crap.
"Raphinha was right, you act like a fucking prude but in reality you are nothing but a slut."
You turn to him. Was that what Raphinha talked to you about when he attacked you? "What did you just say?"
"And now you are deaf." He laughs.
"Is this about me rejecting your invitation?" You ask mad. Was he doing all that because you told him he wasn't your type? "Marcus, this is fucked up. Did you even know what Raphinha did to me?"
"Whatever it was, he probably paid you enough to get something nice, huh?" He says, getting closer. "Did you enjoy it?"
You back off, trying to get away from you. "Don't don't even know what you are talking about."
"You rejected me but decided to fuck a forthy year old dude?"
You don't understand nothing at this point. What he thinks you are doing. "You are confusing things, I'm not doing any of that."
"You just admitted to do it." He yells. You back a little more. "A married guy with kids, fucking slut." He yells.
You feel like you were about to start crying from the anxiety this is giving you. "I didn't do that." You yell back.
The door opens up. A frowny Ferran and Pedri walk in. Seeing the scene and how you are almost cornered up.
"What is going on?" Ferran asks. "Are you okay, Y/n?"
Pedri doesn't even care about answering questions. He walks over to you and shields you with his body.
"Back off." He warns. "No sé quien carajos te crees pero no tienes ningún derecho a gritarle, imbecil." (I don't know who te fuck you think you are but you have no right to yell at her, asshole) he's the one getting closer now, doing the same he was doing to you.
"Obviously, you two are defending her." He laughs. "Did he sucked your dicks too?"
Pedri doesn't need to hear anything else. His fist impacts Marcus. Making him fall over. "I'm not going to let you talk about her at all. You watch your fucking mouth."
Ferran grabs you by the shoulders, taking you out of the room. You don't want Pedri to get in trouble.
"Can you make sure he doesn't punch him again?" You ask Ferran. "I don't want Pedri having repercussions because of him."
Ferran nods, going back inside. You can hear Pedri yelling at Marcus. He was mad and the adrenaline from the game was giving him the attitude.
He was a calm dude. It's not easy to pass him off, let alone get physical with him. But today was Marcus lucky day because Pedri was not taking any shit.
Ferran drags Pedri out of the room. Mad face softens when his eyes lay on you. "Guapa." He hugs you. "Are you okay?"
"I am. Thank you for saving me." You kiss his collarbone. "I'm so confused about why he was yelling at me."
"He won't even dare to even come back after the break. And if he does, Ferran promised him that he would run him over."
You smile. Extending your hand to where Ferran is. He grabs your hand, and you pull him to the hug between Pedri and you.
Carlos, who is just coming back from the bathroom and sees that scene, joins without saying much.
"Why are we hugging?" He asks after a few. Making Pedri, Ferran and you laugh.
🪷🪷🪷
"Two goals, baby." You say, hugging you very sweaty boyfriend. "You did amazing. I'm so proud."
He smiles like crazy, his first goals with the national team, and you surprised him by coming to see his game.
"I played too." Ferran says, watching you and Pedro hug.
Pedro scuff. "Maybe get a girlfriend, capullo."
"Excuse me? Y/n, let me tell you that without me insisting that he asked you out, you wouldn't even be here right now." He leaves, pretending to be mad.
You laugh when you notice Pedri blushing at Ferrans confession. "Well, let's thank him." You say, kissing his lips.
"We can also thank a very straightforward girl who asked me what was the status of our relationship when we were cuddling in bed and watching a movie."
"A smart mind, in my opinion."
You two walk over to the interview side. Since he scored two goals, some news channels wanted him to give the exclusive after the game.
"I'm very proud, I can't wait for Germany." He says to the camera.
"How is your support circle? Will you have your family and friends at maybe one of the games?"
"I have amazing support, my parents, my brother, my girlfriend, my friends, and the fans who always motivate me to be better."
"Girlfriend? Wow, lucky girl. Imagine that the start of today is your boyfriend." The interviewer laughed.
Pedri locks his eyes with you. "Actually, I'm the lucky one." He says.
#football#football fanfic#football angst#pedri x ferran#pedri#pedri x reader#pedri x y/n#pedri angst#pedri fics#pedri fanfic#pedri fluff#pedri imagine#barca#football x you#pedri gonzalez#football fiction#football fluff#barca imagine
586 notes
·
View notes
Text
youtube
I think one of the disconnects between people learning about 4B for the first time since the election and people who recognize that as a movement it has problematic elements (transphobia, homophobia, authoritarianism, purity policing) is that we live in entirely different fucking universes.
I, a leftist living in a blue state, am vaguely appalled at the idea of pigeon-holing all men based on the actions of the kind of men who voted from Trump... because I never had those men in my life in the first place. I've never had one of those men be brave enough to say to my face that he's a trump voter. I cannot really comprehend the idea of a grown-ass adult who until this very moment has actually been living in the Shirley Jackson/Virginia Woolfe dystopia that was presented to me in Women's Studies in college 20 years ago. I do not know even one woman in my life under the age of 75 who doesn't have a job (unless it's for disability reasons) - I come from a social class where you start working under the table/on the side at elementary school age and you're expected to get a job that pays wages as soon as you turn 16.
In the universe I've lived my life in, OF COURSE I wouldn't sleep with a conservative guy! Discussions of politics and stances on key issues are things that happen BEFORE the first date. "I found out he held [a conservative view]" is a relationship-terminating dealbreaker every single time.
The men that I know, that I'm friends with, even the ones that I'm related to are comrades - lots of them are some flavor of queer, the majority of them are nonwhite, they are capable of being platonic friends with women.
I'm 41 years old and have had zero pregnancies, and no one CLOSE to me, whose opinions I actually respect and care about, has ever given me meaningful push-back about it. The 'Oh you'll change your mind' comments have always come from peripheral people like coworkers and teachers (and I dropped off sharply when I passed age 30)
I was never A Desirable Woman (tm) during the age of social media. I was 33 when Tiktok was created. I did not live in this panopticon, and cannot relate. All I can do is A: Believe the testimony of the women who have had these experiences and B: Advise them on ways that I have avoided those experiences.
"Don't be cruel or hateful to entire categories of human beings based on the way that they were born." does not translate in my head to "You are required to coddle and cater to those people." At all. I don't really understand how anyone makes that leap.
How the fuck have you been in the cage for so long?
291 notes
·
View notes
Text
Still thinking about "Dot and Bubble."
Specifically, I'm thinking about how the racists of FineTime aren't just written to be cruel and entitled, but downright childish too. Lindy - in a move that dovetails nicely into the episode's commentary on social media - has the attention span of a toddler, going on and on about how boring work is even though, from what we're shown, she doesn't have to do anything other than sit there and socialize, which is presumably what she'd be doing if she didn't have to work, right? But since this is something she has to do per orders of the gross old people, she complains. "You're no fun!" she yells at Gothic Paul, the only one in her group taking a mature stance on this issue (and, notably, the only one with a very small number of subscribers).
Lindy lacks the maturity and critical thinking skills we would expect from someone her age. Again, this is definitely a layer of the social media side of the episode's thesis, but she nevertheless demonstrates a kind of emotional dysregulation that's usually only seen in younger, developing children. Lindy does not think for herself and cannot adapt to changes in routine/the way things are "supposed" to be. When told a fact - the police are unavailable - Lindy repeats, "but I really need the police" over and over as if her need is going to magic up a change in reality. She parrots rules and rejects them in equal measure, driven solely by her current desires: "We don't do that [lower the bubble]."/"I can do whatever I want!" She moves from disgusted to infatuated to angry in the blink of an eye, with her anger characterized by childish outbursts and language: "Now shut up I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!" When faced with something life-threatening, Lindy's response is to a) distract herself (by watching Ricky) and b) find a hiding place. Even taking her terror into account, she responds to these situations like someone far younger would. If I cover my eyes the bad thing disappears. If I hide under the bed, I'm safe.
And of course, Lindy's body is monitored in the way you would a child's. She's constantly watched by others, both her peers and, presumably, by the Homeworld. She's told when she needs to use the restroom which for me was VERY evocative of a parent speaking to their potty training child, trying to get them to articulate when they need to go by informing them of when it's most likely. Hell, Lindy literally can't walk without the assistance of this AI parent.
Yes, there are plenty of moments that evoke the very stereotypical, entitled teenager - talk of "partying," bragging about clothes, being obsessed with the guy online - but even more, I think, evoke the child. When Lindy plays the recording of "Mummy," smiling shyly at the praise before throwing out the kind of insults you'd expect to hear on an elementary school playground - "You're stupid" - she reads like she's a kid. Which is a hell of a commentary on her racism. The episode doesn't say that Lindy is literally a child (she's not, she even snaps as much). The episode also doesn't try to claim that being childlike equals harmless (quite the opposite). But equating racism with a childish, dangerously inept, can't-even-walk-or-use-the-bathroom-by-herself white woman... damn if that's not a statement.
481 notes
·
View notes