#just say and understand/not have to actively translate in my brain

[halfbit]

fingers crossed that i've been home alone this whole time because i think i was but if not i was loudly singing in a conlang and that might have sounded a bit odd

[bacchuschucklefuck]

the boy-but-not-that-way-ism of riz gukgak send tweet

[dawdlecentric]

Holy shit! Maka & CRONA'S VAs??!!!

[demensrage]

g for get some fun ⚊ • . with itachi and shisui uchiha

summary: training can be fun, but it's more fun when your favorite people decide to give you their full attention. under their care, training will always be fun.

cw: threesome, double penetration, oral (f/m. receiving), fingering, breeding kink, dirty talk, tits sucking.

wordcount: 6.6k

note: english is not my firts lenguage so please forgive me for the grammatical errors I may commit.

© demensrage 2024. do not plagiarize, copy, repost, feed to ai, or translate my works to any other platforms.

Your body trembled with pure rage, so intense that even your muscles hurts. You watched the sun rise on the horizon as you kept ranting, hurling shurikens over and over at the tree in front of you, as if those small weapons could tear away the burning anger from that public humiliation. The scene with your instructor was still seared into your mind.

"No matter how hard you try, you’ll never be anyone." Those words stabbed into your brain like a sharp kunai. How dare he say that to you? He was just a fool consumed by envy. Sure, you hadn’t awakened the Sharingan yet, but your life had been relatively peaceful. You hadn’t faced the darkness needed to activate those eyes that defined your clan.

After throwing the last shuriken, you let out a deep sigh and raised your hands to the sky, stretching. Waking up early to train hadn’t been the best idea, but you felt that need, that urgency to prove your instructor wrong. It didn’t matter that he thought you were destined for mediocrity. You knew your future would be different.

You were more angry than exhausted, and just as you walked to pick up the shurikens embedded in the tree, you realized there was nothing in front of you anymore. You frowned, puzzled, and quickly glanced around. No one was there. You clenched your teeth, biting the inside of your cheek, and cursed quietly.

Suddenly, you felt a soft tap on your head, a playful pat. You spun around quickly, ready to defend yourself, but the shurikens reappeared stuck in the tree as if they had never disappeared. And there, standing right in front of you, was Itachi, looking at you with an innocent expression, but his activated Sharingan told a different story. That intense crimson, with its perfect black tomoe, stirred a mix of admiration and envy in you. The power you so longed to have was right in front of you, and in him, it seemed so natural, as if it required no effort.

"You keep falling for the same trick," said a familiar voice behind you, full of amusement.

When you turned to face him, it wasn’t Itachi who moved, but Shisui, who in a swift and carefree motion, stole a kiss from you. It was fleeting, almost ethereal, but it left a burning spark on your lips.

Your heart skipped a beat as he looked at you with a playful smile, while Itachi stood still in front of you, calm, as if it had all been just another prank between friends.

You couldn’t understand what had changed that suddenly both Shisui and Itachi had started behaving in this strangely affectionate way. Shisui, usually playful but reserved, was now stealing kisses as if it were a regular thing, and worst of all, Itachi, who had always been colder and more calculating, didn’t seem upset or surprised, but... almost complicit.

When did it start being like this? You felt confused. It was as if overnight the dynamic between the three of you had changed without warning, and you were left stuck in the middle, not understanding the new rules of the game. You had trained with them for years, shared missions, laughter, and moments of tension, but they had never dared to cross that line.

You decided not to overthink it, letting it be, because for some reason, it felt... right. As if everything had finally fallen into place, as if this, what was happening between the three of you, was meant to be. It was a strange feeling, but comforting, as if you had been resisting something inevitable for a long time, and now, by letting it flow, everything felt in harmony.

"Did we miss something?" Itachi asked as he picked up your shurikens from the tree for you. His tone was calm, but his words snapped you back to reality. "You seem distracted." His gaze softened, and then he added, with a comforting calmness, "You know, you shouldn't pay attention to what your instructor says."

You watched him approach slowly, and before you could respond, Itachi smiled at you with a tenderness he rarely showed. With a simple but familiar gesture, he gently ruffled your hair. The usual coldness on his face had completely vanished in that moment.

Your breath caught for a moment when his lips brushed against yours with a softness you hadn't expected. It was a kiss so gentle yet deep in its intent, as if he'd been watching how you'd sought the same from Shisui and was now offering it to you on his behalf.

Your thoughts, still a bit disorganized by the sudden change in his behavior, quieted completely. Itachi's kiss had something different. Where Shisui was playful, Itachi was measured and sure.

The question surged back into your mind, like an echo reverberating in your thoughts. You had lost count of how many times those small, intimate gestures had become so commonplace. It had all started in the privacy of one of their rooms, stolen moments that now seemed not to matter at all. The brush of their hands, the glances that lingered a little longer than usual, the silences filled with meaning… Everything had evolved into something much more open, and intimacy had ceased to be a secret.

It was as if they were claiming you as part of them, as if you somehow belonged to their world. You were theirs, only theirs. Right? You always had been, hadn’t you? On reflection, there had never been another friend in their lives besides you. They never talked about other girls with that kind of closeness, and you never saw them interact with other women in a romantic way. Really, they were always where you were.

The realization clicked in your mind immediately, like a gear perfectly fitting into place. You weren’t theirs; they were yours. That idea, once vague, now shone with clarity. They were your friends, your confidants, but also something more. They belonged to you just as much as you did to them.

Itachi was only older than you by less than three months, but that had never been an obstacle. You had known each other since infancy, sharing laughter and tears in a corner of the world that had always belonged to the both of you. Then came Shisui, who joined the friendship you and Itachi shared. He fit in instantly, as if he were the missing piece of a puzzle that had always been incomplete.

Now that you thought about it, they had always orbited around you. You hadn’t noticed it at first, but every gesture and every word took on new meaning. The way they protected you, how they comforted you in difficult moments, or how they allowed you to sleep on them when fatigue overtook you. It was a subtle but profound bond, built on years of trust and loyalty.

You could remember those moments when they carried you in their arms when you asked for help, those instances of vulnerability where you allowed their closeness to envelop you like a warm coat. You tried to recall a time when they weren’t by your side, and it was like searching for a shadow in the dark: it simply didn’t exist. Not even the one time they had denied you something felt real.

They were always there, always ready to offer their support. You were the center of their world, and they were yours. With each revelation, the feeling of belonging grew stronger. It wasn’t just friendship; it was a bond that transcended simple companionship. You were important to them, and the idea that they also belonged to you began to settle deep within your soul.

With every look you shared with Itachi and every laugh exchanged with Shisui, you realized you had never been alone. And now, as you accepted that the love and intimacy they offered you weren’t just gifts but a promise, you felt yourself opening up to a future that had always been there, waiting to be claimed.

"You’re distracted again," said Itachi, frowning as if he could see through the façade you were trying to maintain. "If it’s because of what the instructor said…"

"It’s not that," you replied immediately, letting out a radiant smile that lit up your face. The sunlight seemed to reflect off your cheeks as you tried to downplay his words. "It’s just that I woke up really early."

You couldn’t simply admit that, more than ever, you liked the idea of being part of what they had agreed upon in private. It was a secret that pulsed between the three of you, a connection that felt more intense with each little gesture, each shared smile. Now that you thought about it, the idea of what was happening, though it still lacked a defined name, filled you with a warmth you couldn’t ignore.

Shisui, who had been a step behind, moved a little closer, his smile full of complicity. "Maybe we should train together," he suggested, with that playful air that was so characteristic of him. "That way we can make sure you don’t get lost in thought for too long."

The idea of spending time alone with them, training and joking around, filled you with a barely contained excitement. It was a perfect moment, an opportunity to explore that bond that was forming, that connection that felt more natural with each passing day. You knew you liked what was happening, and now that you were starting to accept it, the possibility of it all becoming something more filled you with anticipation.

You nodded immediately, feeling the excitement grow inside you. "That sounds perfect," you said, carefully taking the shurikens from Itachi’s hand, your fingers brushing his for a brief moment that sent a pleasant shiver through you.

Shisui watched you, a mischievous smile on his lips. “Are you ready to be defeated?” he asked, his playful tone contrasting with the seriousness of the training.

“Defeated? I think you’re mistaken,” you replied, feeling the adrenaline start to flow. “I’m not going to let that happen.” With every word, your determination grew stronger.

“Come on,” Itachi said, his voice firm but filled with a strange warmth. “Show me what you’ve learned.”

With a confident smile, you got into position, feeling the solid ground beneath your feet. You knew your strength lay in hand-to-hand combat, and you were determined to use that to your advantage. However, part of you was aware that, with Itachi and Shisui as your opponents, the odds were against you. Both were prodigies, and while training with them made you better, you knew you’d need more than strength to take them on.

With a swift movement, you launched yourself toward them, knowing the key would be staying unpredictable and taking advantage of any opening you could find.

You let yourself fall heavily onto the grass, exhaustion taking over every muscle in your body. Drops of sweat trickled down your forehead, some lost in the grass while others continued their path down to your jaw. Your chest rose and fell rapidly, desperately seeking oxygen to calm your body’s frantic rhythm after the intense training.

“Just five minutes, okay?” you gasped, covering your face with the back of your left hand while the other rested on your stomach. The contact with the cool air helped you recover, but you knew those five minutes would likely turn into more if you didn’t get up soon.

From your position on the ground, you heard the calm footsteps of Itachi and Shisui approaching. Itachi crouched down beside you with his usual calmness, while Shisui plopped down heavily next to you, letting out a dramatic sigh.

“Five minutes, you say,” Shisui commented, clearly less exhausted than you but pretending to be amusingly exasperated. “I’m surprised you’re not asking for ten yet.”

Itachi looked at you with a small smile on his lips before gently lowering himself onto the grass as well, although remaining more composed. “You’ve improved a lot,” he remarked in his calm tone, as if the combat hadn’t affected him as much.

“I have the best trainers,” you replied with a tired smile, still covering part of your face with your arm. Even though you were exhausted, you couldn’t help but feel a sense of inner satisfaction from Itachi’s words and Shisui’s complicity. After all, training with them was a privilege, and every day made you improve just a little more.

Shisui chuckled softly, gazing up at the sky. “Of course, we’re a marvel,” he joked, though there was a hidden sincerity in his tone.

“It’s not just because of us,” Itachi retorted, looking at you warmly. “You have talent, and you know it.”

Those words made your heart skip a beat. You had heard compliments before, but when they came from them, the impact was different, deeper. You knew both of them were honest with you; they would never tell you something just to make you feel better.

You moved your hand away from your face, feeling the slight coolness of the air as you absentmindedly played with the hem of your leggings, which fit your body like a second skin. “Thank you,” you murmured softly, not taking your gaze off the clouds beginning to cover the sky, trying to maintain calm amid the intimacy of the moment.

The light weight of Shisui’s head settled on your stomach, and a shiver ran across your skin when he left a brief kiss on your thigh, his warm breath marking every touch. You didn’t say anything; you just began to tangle your fingers in his hair, playing with the softness of his strands. The movement of your hands felt almost instinctive, as if they had always been meant to touch him that way.

Itachi, for his part, was equally serene in his actions. His fingers brushed your cheek gently, using his knuckles before taking your chin between his fingers, leaning closer to you. His deep gaze captivated you, as if he were asking permission for what would come next. There was something in his eyes, a mix of tenderness and restrained desire that always managed to disarm you.

You nodded softly, barely a movement, but enough for him to notice. One of your hands left Shisui's hair, gliding down his neck, while your lips met Itachi's in a kiss that shifted from soft to intense in a matter of seconds. His tongue brushed against your lower lip, seeking entry, and without hesitation, you allowed him in, opening your mouth to feel the kiss deepen, becoming more demanding.

Shisui began to leave a line of soft, teasing kisses on your thigh, his mouth slowly advancing while the warmth of his lips spread across your skin. You felt his skilled hands lift the fabric of your top with the same calmness with which he placed each kiss, until his lips found your abdomen. A shiver ran through your body as his warm breath touched your exposed skin.

Each kiss that traveled up toward your neck heightened the anticipation in your body, until finally, his lips reached your collarbone, lingering there with a longer kiss. Itachi pulled away with his characteristic control, leaving space for Shisui to continue, but not without looking at you one last time with that intensity that always disarmed you.

Shisui's lips finally reached yours, capturing you in a kiss that was as heated as Itachi's, but different in its own way—more playful, more wild. The differences between the two had always fascinated you, the way they could complement each other, and now more than ever, you realized how surrendered you were to the delicate balance they shared.

Everything began to take a different path, one that blurred the lines between friendship and something deeper. Itachi's hands found their way under your top, his fingers soft and determined squeezing your breasts through your sports bra, creating a sensation of warmth and desire that made you hold your breath.

“You can say no if you don’t want to,” Shisui murmured against your lips, his voice low and tempting. He gently tugged on your lower lip between his teeth, sending a pleasurable shiver through your body, before licking it with a sweetness that left you yearning for more.

“You don’t have to agree if you’re not comfortable yet,” Itachi added, his tone firm but understanding, as if he were genuinely considering your feelings at that moment. His gaze remained fixed on yours, searching for any sign of doubt or discomfort, making sure you didn’t feel pressured.

“Yes, I want to,” you said, feeling the decision flow clearly in your voice. You exchanged glances with them, a mix of excitement and anticipation filling the air between you.

“Let’s go somewhere else,” Itachi said, helping you to your feet with a firm yet gentle gesture. His hand felt warm around your wrist as he guided you. Shisui followed, his presence close to you reassuring, a reminder that you weren’t alone in this.

Itachi led the way, while Shisui stayed by your side, ensuring you felt comfortable.

Finally, they arrived at a small clearing, secluded and tranquil, surrounded by trees that offered a sense of privacy. The place was illuminated by the soft light of the sunset, creating a magical atmosphere.

“Is this okay here?” Itachi asked, looking around to make sure it was the right spot.

You turned to look at him, feeling a knot of nervousness forming in your stomach. God, they were fucking beautiful; the sunset light illuminated their faces in an almost ethereal way. “Yeah, um…” you began, unsure of how to articulate your thoughts.

Itachi, ever perceptive, noticed you had more to say. With a slight smile, he tilted his head, encouraging you to continue. “No one comes here, just the three of us, and now you,” he said, his voice calm and confident, like an anchor in the midst of your confusion.

You felt a little more relaxed at his assurance. You knew there was a shared trust between the three of you, an understanding that went beyond words. Gathering your courage, you decided to speak.

“Just… I don’t know exactly how… how to proceed,” you admitted, feeling the heat in your cheeks. “I don’t want you to feel pressured, or for this to change what we have.”

Shisui stepped forward, his expression gentle. “No one is pressured. We want you to feel good and safe with us. We’re here for you, no matter how you want this to progress.”

Shisui’s words were like a balm, soothing your anxieties and allowing you to open up to the possibility of what was to come.

You gathered the courage to approach Shisui, your trembling lips pressing against his as you nervously took Itachi’s hand, not wanting to leave him behind. The contact was electrifying, and although your nerves were on edge, you felt it was time to let go.

Itachi’s hands moved firmly, finding your breasts and squeezing them over the fabric of your top, his fingers sinking into you with a mix of desire and possession. Heat built up quickly, elevating the tension in the air.

Shisui broke the kiss, but only to tilt your face toward Itachi, forcing you to look into his dark, deep eyes. “Kiss him,” he murmured as he began to leave kisses and nibbles on your neck, his hot, wet lips trailing sensations that made you shiver. It was as if each touch ignited a spark of desire within you.

You let yourself go, feeling how Itachi responded to your body, his hands gripping you with an intensity that made you gasp. The pace became more frantic, the air thick with a mix of sweat and desire, and you found yourself caught in the whirlwind of their caresses.

The next thing that happened was instantaneous: your shorts and panties disappeared, leaving you completely exposed. Itachi gently pushed you to the ground, and as he removed your top and bra, you felt a chill run through your body. Your hands instinctively closed around your breasts, and you squeezed your legs together, a blush flooding your cheeks as the reality of the situation hit you.

It was the first time you were completely at their mercy, vulnerable and exposed. But as their gazes met yours, a spark of trust ignited within you. They weren’t just men; they were your friends, your protectors. With a trembling breath, you decided it was time to let them take control.

Carefully, you began to uncover your breasts, feeling the cool air caress your skin. Both of their eyes shone with a mix of desire and possession, and although their expressions were dark, you felt them consuming you with their gaze. They shared a brief knowing glance before leaning in, and in a simultaneous movement, each took one of your breasts in their mouth.

A gasp escaped your lips as you felt the warmth and wetness of their mouths on you. Your hands found their necks, pressing their heads closer, binding their lips to your body with a need you hadn’t anticipated. Each suck, each caress, sent waves of pleasure coursing through you, making you lose touch with reality, leaving only the fire that burned in your chest.

Your breasts were a delicacy between their lips, each suction resonating in your mind like an echo of pure pleasure. Shisui focused on one while Itachi alternated between biting and licking the other, creating a rhythm that made your body respond with a ravenous desire.

Itachi’s hands slid down to your waist, exploring your skin as his lips moved with devotion, each kiss leaving a mark of his hunger. “You look so beautiful like this,” Shisui murmured, the vibration of his voice sending a wave of pleasure straight to your stomach.

As both of them dedicated themselves to you, desire took over, filling you with a need you could barely control. You arched your back, seeking more contact, more of them.

The way Itachi cheekily nibbled on your nipple and then licked it to soothe the burning sensation was pure lust. You let yourself go, feeling the pleasure intensify with every movement.

Meanwhile, hands began to make their way between your legs, and the feeling of two fingers parting your folds made you gasp. Shisui’s smile was mischievous, his mouth still busy with your breast, and you felt the tension building. “Fuck, you’re so wet,” he murmured against your nipple, his words sending a wave of heat that made you shiver.

Itachi, wasting no time, joined his hand with Shisui’s, their fingers working in perfect sync as he moved up to kiss you with a possession that made you feel like you had no escape. His lips took over yours, filling you with a mix of desire and urgency, while his other hand twisted and caressed your nipples between his fingers.

Shisui gave your clit a pinch, eliciting a cry of pleasure to escape your lips. Before you could process it, he dipped a finger inside you, making you moan as your hips arched to receive him. “You like that, huh?” he whispered with a mischievous grin, as he began pumping in a slow, teasing rhythm.

Itachi, not missing the opportunity, began to stimulate your bundle of nerves, his fingers moving expertly as his dark eyes focused on you. “Look at you, so soaked for us,” he murmured, his voice filled with desire. The heat inside you increased as you lost yourself in the pleasure.

“See how that makes you feel?” Shisui continued, adding a second finger, increasing the intensity. “You can’t deny how much you like it, can you? Let it all flow out.”

The words made it even more intense. With each thrust, your body responded with a mix of moans and sighs, the pleasure building up more and more.

Itachi leaned closer, his lips barely touching your ear. “You want more, sweetie? Tell me,” he said in a seductive tone. “We won’t stop you, I want you to moan our name.”

“Yes!” you exclaimed as Shisui added another finger, curling it inside you and pressing that sweet spot that made you lose your mind. The pleasure intensified, and your legs spread wider, wanting to be filled even more.

Itachi’s hands gave one last tug to your nipples, a gesture that left you even more turned on. When he pulled down his pants, you couldn’t help but stare brazenly, your eyes fixed on his crotch, ready to discover what he was hiding.

“Sit on my face, sweetie,” Shisui said, his voice thick with desire. The command was a tantalizing whisper, and you couldn’t resist. Without a second thought, you moved, placing yourself on top of him as your body vibrated with anticipation.

With one movement, you dropped down, feeling his mouth find you just as you settled in. Shisui's fingers continued to pump inside you, and the combination of his mouth and hands brought you to the edge of ecstasy.

Itachi watched you, his gaze filled with desire, and that only made the situation even more intense. "That's it, that's how I like it," Shisui said, keeping up his pace as your hips moved, enjoying the pleasure they gave you.

Itachi brought a hand to his cock, fucking his fist as he watched you ride Shisui's mouth, who had his hands wrapped around your thighs, keeping you pinned down on him.

You bit your lip as you felt his tongue tease your entrance, an overwhelming heat running through your body. Your gaze connected to the sight before you; fuck, your mouth was watering just watching it. "Open that pretty mouth for me," Itachi said, his voice thick with desire.

You couldn't resist the temptation. With a brazen gesture, you opened your mouth, ready to please him. The mix of sensations, of pleasure and desire, enveloped you as you let yourself get carried away by the moment.

You took him like a good girl, wrapping your lips around his length, slowly, feeling every inch as you kept eye contact with Itachi. He watched you with overwhelming intensity, his jaw tense as you let your tongue run along his length.

Shisui's muffled moans against your center only increased the pressure in your body, your legs shaking as he devoured you mercilessly, his tongue moving skillfully. Itachi let out a low growl, his hand tangling in your hair, gently guiding you as you sank deeper into the rhythm they both set for you.

You rolled your hips harder as you felt Shisui's hands squeeze your ass, forcing you even closer to his mouth, even though you already felt like you were as close as you could be. His tongue worked relentlessly, finding every spot that made you shiver, while his fingers dug harder into your skin, leaving a trail of heat in their wake.

The wet sound of his tongue moving in you and your own moans, muffled by Itachi's pressure in your mouth, created an intoxicating mix that made you lose yourself in pleasure.

You sucked harder, following the rhythm Itachi set as he looked at you with desire in his eyes. His moans were soft but deep, and every sound that came out of his mouth motivated you to keep going, to give him more. Your tongue brushed his skin with precision, tasting every part of him as you took him deep, letting yourself be guided by the heat and urgency of the moment.

"You're doing so well," Itachi whispered, his fingers tangling in your hair, guiding you gently. His caresses on your head were a contrast to the intensity of the moment, filled with a strange kind of tenderness as he watched you with his dark, piercing eyes.

Shisui, beneath you, increased the pressure of his tongue, causing a moan to choke from your throat, vibrating against Itachi. “Fuck, keep it up,” Shisui growled, his voice muffled by your skin, as his hands gripped your hips tighter, controlling your every movement on him.

You were so close that you couldn’t help but sob in pleasure, the sounds escaping your lips in the midst of your work. Every caress, every brush of Shisui’s tongue, and every thrust from Itachi brought you to the edge, and the heat in your abdomen grew, threatening to spill over at any moment.

“That’s it, let yourself go,” Itachi murmured, watching intently as you lost yourself in the pleasure they both offered you. His soft voice was like a balm, and even though you felt exposed, there was something incredibly liberating about letting yourself go in the moment. The combination of his words and Shisui's actions had you wanting more, more and more, as the pleasure built up inside you.

You felt it coming, that boiling point where the pressure became almost unbearable. Your hip movements became erratic, the need to release all that tension intensifying. Still, you tried to continue your work, holding yourself on the edge as you rode the rising wave of orgasm.

Moans escaped your lips, each sound becoming an echo of the pleasure flooding your senses. Shisui, sensing your struggle, increased the pressure of his tongue, while Itachi looked at you with a fire in his eyes that made you feel even more alive.

"That's it, let yourself go," Itachi repeated, encouraging you. You let yourself fall into the abyss, the wave of pleasure crashing against you, taking you with it. Euphoria enveloped you completely, and in that instant, everything else disappeared.

Itachi pulled away from your mouth, gently caressing your cheek with his fingers, his gaze filled with complicity and desire as your head rested on his thigh. The warmth of his skin was comforting, like a refuge after the storm of pleasure.

Shisui, for his part, caressed your ass before pulling away from you, leaving you with an empty feeling that contrasted with the recent satisfaction. His absence was palpable, but the way they both looked at you, with a glint in their eyes that promised more, filled you with anticipation.

“Are you okay?” Itachi asked, his voice low and soft, as he watched you carefully, as if to make sure you were comfortable after the intense experience. “Yes,” you whispered, your lips swollen and wet, voice shaky from the mix of exhaustion and desire.

Itachi smiled, a glint of satisfaction in his gaze. “You’re amazing,” he murmured, stroking your hair before looking up at Shisui. “Ready for another?” Shisui asked, his tone playful and teasing. “Because I see you ready for more.”

With a slight nod, you braced yourself for what was to come, the air thick with anticipation and desire. You felt the electricity between them, the way they both shared this moment, and you couldn’t help but feel anxious for what was to follow.

“Stay like that, baby,” Itachi said, moving closer until he was behind you. His hands found your wetness, two fingers sliding gently, feeling every response from your body as Shisui settled in beside you.

You felt Itachi's presence behind you, his lips and teeth leaving soft bites on the skin of your neck, the combination of pain and pleasure lighting up every nerve. Itachi held you against his chest, his hands firmly on your thighs, controlling your movements with ease.

As Shisui aligned himself with your entrance, the atmosphere was charged with palpable tension, and with a deep inhale, your body braced itself for what was to come.

Shisui's thrust was firm and deep, slowly filling you as your walls tightened around him, instinctively squeezing him. A gasp escaped your lips as you felt him push his way inside you, stretching you in a delicious way. Your hands gripped his shoulders as your legs wrapped around his waist tighter, trying to adjust to the sensation invading your body.

Itachi, behind you, continued to place soft bites and kisses on your neck, his hands running up and down your sides, fueling the fire already burning within you.

Each thrust from Shisui made your body tremble with a mix of pleasure and need. His movements were slow, but each one was deep, filling you completely and stretching the time between desire and satisfaction. Your breathing became erratic as your head rested on Itachi's shoulder, who continued to spread soft caresses over your skin, his lips tracing a path of heat on your neck.

Shisui's lips found your breast, his tongue teasing your nipple as his hips continued to thrust in a deliberate rhythm. The feel of his mouth combined with the deep movements of his hips made you moan, your body trapped between them, every inch of your skin being claimed by them.

You felt each movement with overwhelming intensity, completely filled by both of them as they moved inside you with such precise synchronicity that it left you breathless. The slow, calculated thrusts seemed to have a purpose, allowing your body to adjust to the intrusion as the pressure inside you grew with each second.

Shisui held you firm against his chest, his hands sliding up your thighs with a contrasting softness to the strength of Itachi, who behind you controlled the pace with measured movements. Each time they thrust, a moan escaped your lips, as you felt them rub against each other inside you.

“More, please.” you gasped, rolling your hips in search of more. The plea that escaped your lips echoed in the air, a sound of desire that motivated them both even more. Shisui smiled against your skin, understanding your need, and began to increase the speed of his thrusts.

Itachi, sensing your impatience, adjusted his pace, causing the two of you to move in perfect harmony. The heat inside you intensified, each deep stroke causing sparks of pleasure to course through your entire body.

“That’s good, baby,” Shisui murmured, punctuating each thrust with a possessive touch as his mouth moved between your breasts, licking and nibbling at your skin.

Itachi, ever attentive, brought a hand down to stroke your clit, adding a new dimension to the wave of pleasure washing over you. “You like it like this?” he asked, his voice soft and commanding. “Yes, yes, yes,” you whimpered in pleasure.

Your response was almost a cry of need, and that only fueled the desire that burned between the three of you. Shisui held you tightly, his movements now more intense, hitting that sweet spot that made your body arch towards him.

“That’s it, baby, let go,” he murmured as his hips slammed into you, producing a wet sound that filled the air. Itachi, noticing your growing pleasure, increased the pace of his caresses on your clit, his fingers moving with precision and firmness.

“You’re so beautiful like this,” Itachi said, watching as you writhed and moaned between them. The combination of their bodies, the pressure and the friction made you feel like you were about to burst, pleasure building in your belly as they both continued to take you higher.

Heat built up inside you, each thrust intensifying that feeling of fullness that was driving you crazy. Your legs wrapped around Shisui’s waist, clinging to him as Itachi continued to stimulate your clit with forceful, precise movements.

“You’re perfect,” Shisui murmured, his raspy voice filled with desire as his hips moved harder. Your body responded to his every move, feeling your walls tighten around both of them, causing a strangled moan to escape your lips.

“Give me more,” you begged, feeling the pleasure begin to consume every corner of your being. Both men looked at each other, a spark of complicity passing between them as they intensified their pace, bringing you to the edge.

“I’m so close…” you breathed out, each word laden with need. With every hip thrust and every caress of Itachi’s fingers, you knew you wouldn’t last much longer. You let yourself go, and in that instant, you decided that the only thing that mattered was this approaching ecstasy.

The waves of pleasure swept over you mercilessly, your body shaking violently as your climax washed over you, drowning your moans in an almost primal scream. The contractions inside you intensified, squeezing both men with each wave, bringing you to a place where time and space seemed to fade away.

Shisui held you firmly, making sure you didn’t collapse as Itachi continued to thrust deep, taking every moment of your ecstasy. The mix of sensations was overwhelming; The heat, the pressure, and the kisses they both bestowed upon you, all came together in a whirlwind of pleasure that left you breathless.

They both filled you, you felt your walls being stained by warm jets of semen. When Shisui and Itachi pulled out of you, you felt their seeds dripping from your pussy.

The warmth of his lips on your skin made you feel even more connected to them, as if each kiss was a silent promise of care and devotion. His hands moved slowly up your hips, drawing soft circles that sent shivers of pleasure through your still sensitive body.

“Are you okay?” Shisui asked, his voice low and full of tenderness as he looked at you with those dark eyes that seemed to understand you better than anyone else.

You nodded, feeling the mix of exhaustion and satisfaction. “Yes, more than okay.”

Itachi leaned in to kiss you again, his mouth so soft and tempting. His warm breath on your lips made you want more of them, more of that connection that had grown between the three of you. In that instant, everything that had happened before faded away, leaving you with only the desire to be here, with them, forever.

[curio-queries]

ARE YOU SURE?!

Episode 3 production Notes

I genuinely wasn't expecting to have much to say on this when I started it but there are definitely some things to chat about with this episode. Get comfy, it's another long post!

Here's a link to my post on eps 1 & 2.

(I guess this is a series now)

The Tone

I was curious about how a few things would be handled with the remainder of the show, and some of the answers are starting to unfold. We definitely have to see how the upcoming episodes play out but there's at least something to evaluate.

My main takeaway from episode 3 is that the tone is so very different from the previous ones. In my last post, I spent quite a bit explaining why AYS was a successful mix of Bon Voyage and In The Soop. That's definitely not the case here. This episode is a mix of Bon Voyage and Run BTS tonally. This episode is more what I was expecting they'd try to do with the edit to highlight the chaos and shenanigans that were a main ingredient in the content of BTS as a full team, especially to cover for the reduced member count from the full group.

Some of the main items that make this episode seem more energetic than the previous ones are:

The timeline. Episode 3 covers far less time than 1 or 2 did. It makes it seem like there's just too much going on to fit in the same parameters, which again makes the tone seem overall more rushed and hectic.

The music: far higher bpms consistently on all of the backing tracks.

The choppy edits. When we recognize that there was something missing in the middle of an interaction, our brains are still processing what we might have missed and orienting to what we're seeing next. With all of that going on, it easy to feel 'left behind' in even the most casual of scenes.

The intended audience. I just had one moment here that bumped me. At some point one of the members clearly says 'Fighting' but the translation wasn't just that word. It was a whole sentence about wishing for encouragement or something. These episodes have been very clearly laid out for an audience that is not only familiar with BTS but enough so that we know who each of these members are and why they might be doing these kinds of activities. If you had none of this basic knowledge, I genuinely don't think this show is even watchable...so why would people with that level of understanding need an alternate translation to 'Fighting'? Idk, maybe I'm being overly sensitive but like I said, it bumped me enough to question who their target audience was. Something I didn't even question with the prev eps.

Edited to add: an example of the tone influenced by the edit. Can't believe I forgot this one. It stood out to me in my first watchthrough. Thankfully our beautiful giffers captured the story beats for us all.

The Edit

Like I said at the beginning, this episode was far less a blend of ITS and BV and more a mashup of BV with Run BTS. The only thing in this episode that reminds me of ITS is the extremely choppy edit, which i think most would agree was not one of the highlights of those shows.

There are so many unresolved story beats in this episode of AYS! If you're not used to noticing something like this, here's an example:

In the car after their meal, vmin discuss that it'd be nice to pull over for some pics.

At the coffee drive through, Jimin makes a point to coordinate a stopover with JK so he can have his drink.

...and then we arrive at the house with no resolution. Did they stop? Did JK get his drink? We don't know, the only evidence we have is Tae carrying his partially consumed drink. So IF they stopped, Tae either didn't drink his or it was a very brief stop to not finish.

Here's another one:

When arriving at the house, the guys are all commenting bout how nice the place is.

Jimin exclaims about the pool.

...we don't get an establishing shot of the pool. On a rewatch of the episode, once you already know where it is, you're able to notice it for the slightest of moments but that's it. No hint of how big the pool is or even where in relation to the members it's located. It's just a tiny thing, not even important to the storyline but it leaves the audience without a reference to what the members are talking about.

There are dozens more of examples I could list but I think you get the idea. Again, not a big deal on small productions but you KNOW there was plenty of b-roll footage of the place. We see some of it. These are mostly just tiny observations that, if isolated wouldn't mean anything, but repeatedly set the tone for how the audience will be experiencing the rest of the episode.

The Guest

Another choppy edit is how they handled the introduction of Tae and the narrative that explains his presence here when he wasn't in the previous episodes. They either didn't get any good footage explaining it or they decided to purposefully try to cut it 'dynamically' for a reveal... in my opinion, this was not successfully done and just leaves the viewer feeling like we just need to accept the confusion and enjoy the endearing moments....which is exactly one of the main things I comment on in my Run BTS series. The BTS production team is astoundingly terrible at entertaining exposition. Long time armys are just used to it by now and I really don't see them changing anytime soon. They know ppl will watch the content for the moments we get to spend with the members, whether there's a proper narrative or not, so why bother?

Anyway, it's clear to see why those who have a bias against Tae have been using this as ammunition in their fanwars. It's just an awkward narrative that was poorly presented. (Personally, I'd rather everyone just focus on celebrating the members moments with each other rather than warping them to win imaginary points in a pointless battle but alas, I'm just an aging fan in a space that rewards useless vitriol).

Jimin's sickness...again

Poor guy just can't catch a break! At least that was the point they were trying to make editing it this way. Honestly, Jimin has so far been not as impacted as he was the previous episodes. Likely due to this upset being far more mild than the last one. However, there's so much more tension with it cut the way it was in episode3. It's not just that we're aware of it upfront unlike we were in episode 1. It's only highlighted in moments where Jimin is NOT participating in whatever the others are: not eating, not swimming, not climbing. In episode 1, most of the scenes that included any mention of Jimin feeling unwell also included some hint of JK wanting to take care of him or inquiring after his health. Episode 3 includes no such scenes. The overall impact is a much lighter view of how the members spent an exciting day rather than a genuine look into how they're interacting with each other as humans.

One last note: The Sound

There are definitely some horrific sound moments this episode! So much so that I noticed some on my first watchthrough! Again, there are allowances to be made, this is not a show being shot on a sound stage in controlled conditions but some moments were just plain misses in the edit.

For example, when vmin is listening to music in the car, the balancing of SEVEN from vmin's audio is horrific. The way to do this properly is manage the audio levels of their voices alone and overlay with the music track. This will help mask any audio that leaked into their mics. Something that can be easily done with rights to the music...which they have. And oh look at that, they do it correctly for J-Hope's Arson! It honestly is just coming across as a missed correction on the edit but I'd expect more from a BTS show that's licensed to Disney.

That's it for now. Overall, I'm disappointed in the edit of this episode but moreso because of how pleasantly surprised i was by the previous episodes. This one was very much kn par with other BTS content. Im also looking forward to the remaining episodes as I estimate we'll see a little more liveliness from our latenight-loving Jimin now that he's had his nap! 😆

Edited to add:

Are You Sure?! MasterList

[nocturnowlette]

There seems to be a lot of unquestioned arbitrary rules inserted into place for what people think a trigger is in hypnosis.

The actual definition is very simple, at least from my perspective. A hypnotic trigger is anything that causes recall of a hypnotic suggestion. Anything.

The trigger itself doesn't need to be reinforced or have even been said before for it to be a trigger so long as it causes recall, it does not have to be a word or a sound. So long as the subject's brain can recognize it as a distinct thing, then it counts. It's closer to ontology than anything.

That being said, you need to understand properties of triggers and how every single aspect of a trigger will affect how the conditioned suggestion is received.

One of the most common and baffling mistakes I see both in trances and in triggers is the "active time" of the trigger; that's to say, the amount of time the brain needs to be acting on that suggestion.

I've always despised visual of an elevator or an ice block, because the subject needs to be hyperfocused on a very slow climb and fall which is near impossible to maintain the consistency of, especially if they need to focus on other things too.

In contrast, a trigger or suggestion that takes place near-instantly or over a few seconds only requires a moment of making an active change, which is simpler and more consistent, and allows for variability in the strength of the effects since you don't have the last minute of change to compare it to.

If this drop trigger only worked 80% as well as the last one, it's a lot harder to notice with a chunk of time of nothing happening between them. Even consistent, small bursts are better than a constant change, like stepping down stairs instead of going down an elevator.

Snaps are the most common form of signifying a trigger because we can make it with our hands, but more importantly, because they're sudden and loud.

The aesthetic of a sudden and loud sound translates to the subject's brain how to interpret the feeling of that trigger. This also means, though, that if you have a trigger that isn't meant to be a burst, that you may not want to use a snap at all.

This also extends into the idea of "suggestion equivalency", as I would call it.

Essentially, you want the aesthetics and potency of the trigger to reasonably match up to the effects of the suggestion itself. The reason a snap is powerful is because you're condensing a very strong effect into one moment. However, if you try to stretch that intense potency to multiple seconds, it'll simply fail. There is only so much focus, there is only so much trigger potency.

One of the myriad reasons I despise key elman inductions is the suggestion of "doubling trance" every time you blink. There is a cartoonish, absurd potency required for that idea that anyone who knows hypnosis at all from the hypnotist or subject side (or just like, the wheat and chessboard tale) would get severe cognitive dissonance from attempting to follow it.

Another issue to consider is the generality and widespreaded-ness of a conditional trigger.

One file from MissLilith that I think was rather silly (and I'm only ragging on her here because I like her work) tries to give the suggestion that any time you see any plant at all, you get aroused. Furthering the idea of keeping up intensity over time, if a stimuli is so ubiquitous that someone experiences it constantly, the spectacle of it is simply gone. That suggestion will, optimistically, exhaust itself within hours.

That's not even to mention that fact that seeing something does not have nearly as much of a spectacle and intense impact as a sudden sound or word. There's a reason why movies have stingers to signal sudden scary moments or realizations.

From a community perspective, you should also avoid the most common trigger words unless you want someone to be dropped accidentally or have your suggestions lumped in with ones from other hypnotists and files.

The last issue is another practical one, the idea of stimulus generalization.

Shortly after an intense session I had involving snaps one time, I watched a 2 hour long video by Nexpo about Petscop (good and atmospheric overview, though Nexpo is terrible when it comes to actually analyzing media himself).

Thing is, the text changing sounds in the game sound a scary amount like a snap. So, every single time there was gameplay audio, I'd get triggered by it, essentially fractionating myself due to continually bringing myself up right after it happened.

Clicker sounds can be set off by pens, snaps by other sudden, high-pitched single noises, even general obedience suggestions can be triggered by another person to your subject if they act similar or have a similar sounding vocal tone to you, among other things. One must always consider that possibility.

Overall, words as triggers are common for a reason, but you can do essentially anything, so long as you recognize many of the common shortfalls of doing so.

Good luck, and happy hypnotizing.

[honeytonedhottie]

for rest and relaxation⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🎐

GIVE YOURSELF TIME ;

give yourself time to rest and relax and focus entirely on yourself and feeling better. choose a specified amount of time to just rest. this frees up time for inner work, healing etc. during that time identify the "why" to which u feel the way that you do.

identifying the issue helps you, after the rest and relaxation, to understand what it is that u need to focus on the most. therefore u can formulate goals suited to deal with the issue. set some ground rules before you start your resting period so that then your not going to be moving backwards on your goals.

RESTFUL MOVING ;

when u rest its important to not just sit at 0%. what i mean by that is always do at least a little something. when u make it a habit to just give 0% and do absolutely nothing, you'll find that things that u worked for will start to deteriorate and ur health both mentally and physically will be worse then when u started which isnt the point of rest at ALL.

im not saying that while ur resting and relaxing you have to be doing a whole workout or running x amount of miles. what im saying is that whilst resting do 1% of that. an example of restful moving could be...

dance when u wake up - i saw this in a tiktok and basically the logic behind this is that when ur dancing ur giving your body freedom and fluidity that translates to ur brain as well. so that then ur not so stiff and rigid and it improves ur mood.

DURING THE ROT ;

something that i find interesting to do is that while ur rotting, document it and write out what u do/did while rotting. that way when ur done with ur rest and relaxation you can look back and see what u did. doing so can also help u see what u needed or easily identify what was wrong/what sent u into rot.

ways i spend my resting time : setting aside time to think, write in my journal. spending time girlblogging, working on projects and formulating ideas. spending quality time with my dog. watching shows that i have on my watch list. reading lots and lots of books, manga etc. taking frequent naps and writing down the dreams that i've had. doom-scrolling on tiktok. watching true crime video essays.

AFTER THE ROT ;

if you haven't read my post the feel better formula, i rly recommend that u do so that then u can see the how to get out of that rot. but if u haven't read the post i'll quickly go over the points here.

listening to music and dancing

listen to songs that give you dopamine and just songs that you'd feel comfortable dancing to. in the feel better formula post i mentioned that twice gives me lots of dopamine so whenever i need some i listen to their songs.

practicing self care

getting ready everyday has been a game changer for me. even if ur not going out after ur rot just get ready as though you were. get into some cute clothes, practice self care, do ur makeup

a nice long journalling session

my journalling routine is update my diary 2x a week and do a shadow work session 1x a week. but for my longer journaling sessions i'll do an extended shadow work session and journal and get out whatevers on my mind onto paper.

(self care activity + something that engages ur mind + REAL rest + movement + hobby = feeling better).

SOME WAYS TO RELAX ;

sound bath ; sound healing is something that’s been interesting to learn about for me. so the concept of a sound bath is just relaxing and bathing yourself in sound frequencies as a way to relieve stress, healing, and general wellness. 

how i like to do it, is i’ll just look up “sound bath” on youtube and while im stretching or just laying down i’ll listen to it and it’s so soothing! or i listen to these subliminals by i want it i got it and they have frequencies in them so i do that as well. 

at home spa day ; reference this post bcuz it gives a little at home spa day routine.

[choicesmc]

nvm nell is back at the drawing board

think I finally figured out Jiahao’s relationship!

jia x cas x gabe | as in Cas is dating both Jia + Gabe but Gabe and Jia aren’t dating each other. They have a situationship lmao.

[chaotic-archaeologist]

I have about 3 years left until I have a masters degree, but I want to work in CRM/my country’s equivalent to we-wanna-build-a-road-here-you-better-save-the-graves for a few years maybe before i possibly go for a phd. As a neurodivergent person who struggles with routines and energy levels I think a lot about how i would manage such a massive full time job. Currently I work part time at a museum that hosts small archaeological digs for kids and adults, and i have been on excavation courses before, so I know how it partially feels like.

My question is; how do archaeologists who work in the field make time and energy for going to the gym, hanging out with friends and cooking etc outside of work? It can be so intense when you work with stuff you love. Any thoughts?

- @academiaautumn

I think the best advice I can give you is that you need to get in contact with someone working this job in your country who can give you a sense of how things work, because every country is going to be a little bit different. If you're in college/university, your professors probably have connections with colleagues or former students that they can put you in contact with.

I haven't done CRM, but I've been in similar situations and heard from friends who have, and I'll be real with you: a lot of the things you're asking about? You just do not do them. But keep in mind this is for US CRM and your mileage (or kilometerage) may vary.

These jobs are location specific, so you have to travel to wherever the excavation is. Usually for a set duration, with the longest being maybe a couple of months. This time frame and travel limits a lot of what you can do. The company employing you will put you up in a motel, but it probably won't have a kitchen. Because of the travel, most of the people you know are probably on the dig with you.

Time and energy... it depends. Check out the notes on this post for different archaeologists talking about what they do in a day. CRM is hard work, which can also translate to less energy for socialization/extracurricular activities than less physical jobs.

I'm a big believer that archaeology is for everyone, but unfortunately that does not mean that all areas of archaeology are accessible across the board. Before committing to this plan, you need to get a very clear understanding of what this work entails and how that interacts with your own needs. If you don't think those are compatible, 3 years out is plenty of time to start coming up with alternatives for after your master's (which I'm sure exist).

I did not go into CRM because of my own brain and body issues. I'm not saying that you can't or shouldn't, I'm saying that CRM is a difficult environment and you should do everything you can to set yourself up for success.

If anyone who does have actual CRM experience wants to add their perspective, that would be great.

-Reid

[neodreamgirl]

I have something to say...I was very annoyed with what I saw on X the day the news about Taeil being dropped from NCT because he is under investigation for sex crimes came out. Of course when something like this comes out people immediately try to point their fingers to the other members and question if they had known all along that someone they've been working with for 8+ years was capable of committing sex crimes. That's a valid question, I'm not going to sit here and deny it, but what annoyed me was the fact people kept talking as if anything related to the other members came out and confirmed these suspicions. Nothing specific about this incident came out for people to be all like, "There's NOOO WAY they didn't know!" How do YOU know? What detail between Taeil and his victim has you so convinced that the other members knew what was going on? We know nothing. Nothing official about his victim and his actions have been reported so why are we running rampant with all these rumors? Not only that, but all these hypotheticals are just taking the attention away from Taeil, the one that's under investigation for sex crimes. Now you're directing your attention to people who weren't reported to have done anything to anyone. You're paying attention to speculation instead of official reports from the police. Please...

Another thing that pissed me off was the spread of unofficial information provided by random twitter users. Information that hasn't even been confirmed being spread around like it is fact. There are threads that are full of random screenshots and translations that any non Korean speaker would have no choice but to believe is correct. Then, there are threads debunking these rumors or criticizing some of the translations because, according to native Korean speakers, they don't make sense and the hangul is fucked. Wouldn't anyone seeing this online just think to themselves: "Hey, you know what, since there is so much back and forth about this information, let me ignore this and believe the things that have been reported as facts. The facts being that Moon Taeil was kicked out of NCT because he is being investigated for sex crimes. If all those screenshots and stuff turn out to be true, okay." It's not that deep. I don't understand. The whole, "BELIEVE ALL VICTIMS" thing is dope and all but it has rotted some of your guys' brains, especially because it has become some sort of performative activism. You aren't thinking straight at all. You just want some random that ends up on your profile to see you're not a "Taeil apologist" (???) because you're retweeting or reposting all this random information. Go outside, please. Also, in this instance, we don't even know if the woman that filed charges against him is the same woman in these screenshots going around. So whose story are you really spreading around? YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW.

This lack of...media literacy is devastating to say the least. Again, all we know is that a woman filed charges against Moon Taeil and he is now under investigation for sex crimes. That is enough for me to tune his bitch ass out and never want to see his face again.

Lastly, something that is also getting on my nerves is that some fans are wording their issues strangely...They're saying things like Taeil "betrayed" his members...girl. No the hell he didn't. He showed them nothing but love and commitment. "We all waited for you and you go on and do this?!" Girl...You are not a victim. NCT is not a group of victims and NCTzens are definitely not victims. You don't know that man and that man has never touched you or violated you. You're just mad because you never thought you would have to hate him. That's all. You're acting like it's a personal attack to you when it isn't and you also don't know him personally so chill out. Now you're making this about yourself and non victims. LIke, can we FOCUS? MOON TAEIL WAS KICKED OUT OF NCT BECAUSE HE IS UNDER INVESTIGATION FOR COMMITTING A SEX CRIME AGAINST A WOMAN.

[german-enthusiast]

At the moment I’m doing an exchange year here in Germany, I’ve been here almost 2 months but I don’t feel my speaking skills has improved like I excepted. Don’t know if I’m doing something wrong, even if during the day I hear many new vocables they don’t leave a lasting impression on my brain (I don’t if that makes sense) and I’m feeling very often without words to express myself. Idk do you have any advice?

Hello!

I think you have to give yourself some grace. 2 Months is not the shortest of times, sure, but you moved to a different country where you probably knew nobody or only very few people. Arriving takes time, even without the language aspect! It took me a long while to feel I've arrived in my exchange year, much longer than it took to find a routine, to explore the area, to know my way around the school etc.

You say you're worried you're doing something wrong but there's no way to fail an exchange year! You're there to have an experience! To see a different place! To talk to different people! To figure out who you are away from the people and places you've grown up around!

Speaking is a very difficult part of learning a language, because it takes much more courage than the rest. Listening, reading, writing - they allow for more time and passive vocabulary is always bigger than active vocabulary (for natives too!). With speaking, you're bound to be misunderstood a hundred times, to mispronounce something, to forget words. But that is not a personal failure on your part. It's true for everyone learning a language, both one's mother tongue and any foreign language.

You hear a lot more German every day now and don't feel it's leaving a lasting impression - i think that's a very valid feeling but also to be expected. Children hear a million words everyday too, listen to the radio with their parents, see movies on tv, and still they'll still learn the meanings of words only seven, ten, fourteen years into being a person.

My advice would be

- continue trying. try try try, even if and because it will means you will make mistakes. making mistakes is how we learn

- stay curious about the language and words. if you don't understand something but think it is meaningful for you, take the time to understand it later (take a picture to look at later, ask a native about it, allow yourself to find meaning when you have the energy and time). Even if you feel you've "failed" in the moment, you can still learn later on!

- if a word you hear seems to be meaningful to you (meaning, you think it would be a good addition to your active vocabulary), investigate it. Ideally, ask someone to elaborate on it, give example sentences and common occurrences, explain nuances and thenYou use it. Make example sentences, look for where in your life that word might come up and verbalize that. Words move from passive to active vocabulary by being actively used often and thus staying at the ready for you to use.

- whenever you move to grab your phone and google a translation of a sentence or even just a word, stop yourself and try just one more time. Paraphrase, describe, gesture, build new words. If then you're understood and the person listening gives you the words you were missing, they have a pile of meaning to join in your head, probably anchoring them better than a translation out of a void would've. And if you're still not understood, the void is still there for you to help out.

that's all I've got right now but I already know I'll be thinking more about this.

You're welcome to reach out if you've got questions or just need someone to listen!

[mxtxfanatic]

I'm not very active online socially, so I find your takes on the whole JC stans situation very helpful and interesting. It does a lot to contextualize what I see reading a lot of fanfiction, wherein I've found much MDZS fanfiction to be very divorced from the reality of the source material, both due to cultural insensitivity towards the Chinese source material, the CQL problem, and of course the ubiquitous JC apologia. I've been in equally, if not more, contentious fandoms before (the Sherlock fandom comes to mind) but, if I can be frank, to me the difference between those experiences and now is that MDZS is an actually good book! I feel like a lot of the fandom inclinations toward sanding down conflicts or exacerbating them, inventing personalities for background characters, turning all the characters into dolls and the setting into your dollhouse (which no one else may touch!) were codified for the current userbase in Superwholock, whether people realize or not. Those fandom instincts were helpful when working with source material that was shallow, inconsistent, and from the english-speaking world, but it did not equip fandom to deal with a book from a foreign culture that didn't need "fixing" for lack of a better term. It also reminds me a lot of early otaku culture in the USA, with the botched translations, weird cultural takes, and... odd characterization in fanfiction (why does Naruto need a harem???). Which, one may hope, could indicate that things will get better over time. That's just my spaghetti thrown at the wall, though.

I think it's a combination of both the quality of the book (Western fandoms are unused to having source materials with such tight storytelling where they don't have to fill in major parts of the plot with their own imaginations) and racism (Western fandoms feeling so entitled to Asian works while also not respecting their creators enough to even pretend to attempt to understand what the creators are trying to say, instead, choosing to fall back onto the orientalist "those Asians are just an enigma" stereotypes to justify superimposing their own ideas onto the text and calling it "basically the same thing").

I also believe that the sheer volume of unchallenging art that the Western world mass-produces, paired with disdain towards literary pursuits like critique and analysis, has led to a generation of "fans" who believe that the only "right" way to engage in your favorite media is to turn your brain off. "If you joined fandom to share quotes from the book and not just follow the 'incorrect-quotes-blog' and laugh at out-of-context excerpts, then what's your problem???" seems to be the consensus nowadays.

Here's to hoping one day people get over themselves and realize that just because their usual interests are careless drivel written to make money doesn't mean that everyone is writing trash stories they could care less about outside of how much money it makes them. Mxtx writes amazing stories, but you don't actually care about the story like you claim you do if everything you "love" about it can be easily just summarized in a recycled fandom trope meme.

[local-philocalist]

Entry to your 20s, advice to the 20-year-old women

Four pieces of advice for the twenty-year-old women from a twenty-something year old woman.

1. Move Your Body

I cannot stress this enough, if you can, please move your body! Move your joints and build your muscles. The doctors, scientists and our parents were unfortunately right, the older one becomes, the weaker they get. If you want to still be able to run around in your fifties, sixties, etc. You need to start the habit now. Get a routine, start working out, try a sport, attempt a dance class, and get active in general.

I’ve recently gotten a gym membership and have begun pilates once or twice a week. Although at first, my muscles were burning, my body soon got used to it and I found my stamina and flexibility improving.

However, you don't need to spend money on a gym membership or Pilates to get fit. You can take a run around your local park, start a sports team with your friends, or try a YouTube workout from the comfort of your home. There are so many different ways to stay fit without emptying your pockets.

2. Eat Your Vegetables

I understand that some people are genuinely picky eaters and their parents never took the initiative to introduce different textures and flavours healthily. Thus this has followed into adulthood and are now unable to eat anything outside the same four meals.

I also understand I cannot say too much as someone who can eat almost anything but as a reformed vegetable hater I do have a little bit to offer. To live a long, healthy life vegetables are a necessity. So if you find yourself unable to eat certain vegetables, I would suggest cooking the vegetables differently, or incorporating ingredients you enjoy in your meals, think outside the box!

There are many articles about breaking picky eating, as adults we should try to expand our tastebuds, there's so much food to enjoy in this life. Nobody likes to be the person ordering chicken fingers at a Michelin restaurant.

3. Feed Your Brain

[edited: the previous paragraph has been published on my personal substack as a full piece; I've rewritten and changed this section for publication and privacy purposes].

I urge young women to nurture their brains; you are so blessed to be in a society and world where education is so accessible for women. If you live in the West, take advantage and don't feed into the propaganda of "I'm just a girl". Women are being minimised, and I don't want young ladies falling down the rabbit hole of this recent no-purpose lifestyle that's advertised.

Looks are essential, and don't get me wrong, I know attraction still plays a huge part in society, but it isn't the only important thing. It's not cute to be ignorant, lack life skills and use social media concepts like "I'm just a girl" as excuses. Stupidity isn't hot, so while it's okay to indulge in media consumption, find yourself hobbies outside of that and put in the effort to grow intellectually and further yourself.

4. High Self-esteem Will Protect You

Most of my girlfriends are in the dating field, and from the stories they tell me its clear these men are crazy. Good discernment is needed and for you to trust your discernment you need a healthy level of self-worth.

I’m not just talking about romantic interest, in general, high self-esteem will take you far in life. From romantic partners to career paths, when you know your value and do not settle, that translates to every crevice of your life. People treat you with more respect, you're likely to find yourself in fewer abusive scenarios and get better opportunities in your place of work.

Nothing good comes from beating yourself down and letting others treat you horribly. Overall your twenties can be fun but also filled with anxiety so take it step-by-step, don't beat yourself up and remember comparison is the thief.

[system-of-a-feather]

Trauma, Mindfulness and Meditation

IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: This is NOT professional advice. This is NOT medical advice. This is SOLELY peer advice and pointers from my experience with CPTSD / DID and as a Buddhist; try this and engage with the topics mentioned here at your own careful discretion

I was thinking about it this morning, but the way a lot of professionals and practitioners handle the topic of Mindfulness and Meditation comes from the way that they are clinically taught and ways that are primarily geared for individuals who have not spent the majority of their life 1) dissociated and 2) holding a shit ton of trauma in the body; thus a lot of the time, approaching mindfulness and meditation can be - often as the common best first experience - an extremely challenging thing for individuals with C-PTSD and/or DID to engage with or out right triggering / flooding to engage with. Often the methods - in my experience - that therapist have tried relate either back to the 5-4-3 Method (which helps more acutely) or jumping right into sitting in silence, paying attention to your body / breath, and clearing your mind which often simply does not work for me. The former is very helpful and I do think its a great tool and thing to practice to work on grounding, but what I wanted to kind of discuss was the latter approach.

Mindfulness and Meditation are two things that are extremely prevalent in Buddhist practice and philosophy, and multiple therapy types have taken inspiration and notes from those particular practices and it isn't to say that those applications are wrong - they aren't and both of those are things that are suggested in some branches of Buddhism and by some practitioners - but as someone who is a practicing Buddhist, I think there is some details lost in translation that make mindfulness and meditation a lot more accessible to all.

Misconceptions of Terminology

I find the words "meditation" and "mindfulness" thrown around a lot, but often times, I find a lot of people have a slightly warped / off understanding of it.

In both Buddhist perspective AND clinical perspective, Mindfulness is simply being aware of the present. In a lot of mental health spaces, mindfulness can be added onto and emphasized in specific areas - such as emotional / body mindfulness and similar - but at the end of the day, mindfulness is the simple concept of being aware of the current present moment right now.

Meditation, however, is the concept I find most people have an extremely limited understanding of and concept of in western spaces - including professional spaces. Often, when people talk about meditation in western spaces, people assume that it is sitting down in a cross legged position, hands resting connected to the side, and breathing as you empty your head of all thoughts and - in some practices - that is true, but meditation is far more than that.

Meditation, in itself, is an art form and an active and intentional action, a focus on deeply engaging and observing the action and the state of being that you are in the present moment.

Most importantly, meditation is NOT about emptying your mind of all thoughts and that is often a pitfall ALL people seem to get stuck in. If you try to not think, you will be thinking about not thinking. Your brain will always have thoughts going around, and thats okay and normal! Meditation is about focusing on the present and engaging in active awareness and letting all the other thoughts simply pass by. It's about looking THROUGH the thoughts to observe the now.

The reason meditation is often understood to be the stereotypical sitting position is because of media, Orientalism, and the fact that its a much easier to understand concept for people who are unfamiliar with it to learn and emulate. In a Buddhist perspective, that form of meditation is the act of intentional sitting and/or intentional breathing. You are practicing being fully engaged in the simple act of just sitting or just breathing which is a fundamental step to the end goal of the practice of Just Being and often, for people who are not chronically dissociated, it is a really good starting point.

In my experience, however, as a dissociative person who has been disconnected from my body and survived by endless moving and endless hypervigilance, the skill of just sitting and just breathing were WAY too high of a bar for my current capabilities; thus whenever I tried to do it, I would get uncomfortable and my brain would immediately reject it no matter how much I intentionally tried. So I wanted to provide some "steps" up to that point coming from the perspective of a Buddhist who has / had DID.

Meditation is More than Sitting and Breathing

I honestly think if anything of this post is too long wound or anything, I do strongly recommend just listening to Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche talk about awareness and meditation, because honestly he handles the intricacies better than I do.

In my practice, the first and most important mini-step in learning mindfulness and meditation as a skill, is to first practice the intention to practice it in a manner that is conducive to skill building.

With that in mind, the first goal / skill to master is a rather simple one. Practice going outside with little to no distractions (don't bring electronics or if you do, keep it off and don't use them; limit the fidgets, limit artificial / man made stimuli and distractions, etc) and just find a place to stand, sit, walk. Do this maybe two minutes every other day. Practice at that time point until it becomes easy or, even better, you find yourself naturally wanting to do longer periods.

Finding time, willpower, and the intent to take time out of your day to day to build the skills of Just Being is - in itself - a very difficult task for some, so be kind to yourself. It's hard choose to step back and slow down in modern society, and even harder to apply it

The goal of this step is to just built the habit and awareness of your intent to practice and your interest in building this skill as that habit / intuitive awareness of your intent to practice will help with the second step.

The second step, one that can be done while you are practicing the first if you are comfortable, is to build the skill of observing and intentionally choosing to being aware of things.

This is a skill you don't actually necessarily have to go outside to do, but I find the best practice of this skill is done in combination with the first one. To practice this skill, you have to just simply pause your day to day life every so often and simply *look* at something. This sounds easy, but is deceivingly often hard to do when you start. With that in mind, there are two ways I recommend practicing this depending on how it works for you.

The first way it to practice this DURING the dedicated time you have set aside for building the skill of intentional practice. If you are outside, just choose to look at something, observe it in detail. Try to keep the thing in the forefront of your mind for an extended period of time. What does it look like? How does it move? What things are interacting with it? Even if its an inanimate object, what does it feel? What does it mean? Where does it exist in the world and in life? Just let your thoughts about that object and what you see flow wherever it goes, but try to keep that object as the center of your focus for some time. Do it again with another thing, perhaps observe the existence of two things in relation to each other. Just deeply look and focus on something you see.

I personally love to look at the color green or the movement of life / living beings, but in less abstract concepts of observation; you can just observe trees, leaves, wind, birds, bugs, people, rocks, water, etc. Whatever seems nice, just observe it in depth. If your thoughts trail off from the object, that's okay! Just gently guide your focus back to the object, and return to your observations. Look at things like its the first time you've ever seen it, like you were an alien just stopped onto the face of the earth and this thing in front of you is the most mysterious thing you've ever seen.

The second way, and the most practically applicable way to build this skill is to - throughout your day and day - intentionally be aware of an object when you were otherwise just going about your day to day. That sounds easy, but the challenge is that you have to make yourself think of something when you are otherwise not thinking about it. That's why its helpful in the first step to let the intent of practice become something that floats in your mind. If you are going about your day to day, and you catch the thought passing about this post, mindfulness, meditation, practicing your skill, you can grab that floating thought as a reminder to just be aware of yourself and your action.

Right now, pause reading, look around, and find something around you. Observe it, focus on it, think about it for a bit, acknowledge its existence in relation to everything, acknowledge its state of being, what its doing, what it's purpose. Deeply and intentionally acknowledge that it is there. What's interesting about it?

Right now, I have a white plastic bin near me. I actually usually forget that it's there because I'm accustomed to it always being there that I only really notice or pay attention to it when I want to use it, but it is there. It has my pencils and pens and markers and sticky notes. I've had it actually for years and its always been there, but today I actually am looking at it, and its actually a bit lopsided as it stands because it was placed under a notebook that I actually don't remember what it has written in because I have genuinely forgotten that notebook existed. Both the plastic bin and the book are there, I had forgotten they were there and I stopped being aware of them, but they are there. I don't think I need to do anything about them being there, but maybe I should see what the notebook was used for. Maybe I should put it in another place.

With those TWO skills, you can probably fill years of practice. All of that, by the way, is considered meditation, both halves independently or in tandem, is meditation. The point of both of those practices, is the overall combined skill of actively choosing to pause the autopilot flow of life / stress and to practice being present in the moment, the most fundamental core of both mindfulness and meditation.

Overtime with practice, being able to pause your thoughts, your experience, your feelings, and to take a momentary step back and just observe yourself, your internal experience, and your external experience becomes easier; sitting and doing nothing but sitting becomes easier; breathing and doing nothing but breathing becomes easier and - the most valuable thing for me - the ability to exist with yourself and enjoy just being, becomes easier.

[daraku-ou]

ok ok i wanna talk about this at length and not on twitter where i can say like three sentences but i think a lot about how femt will sit around and say how humanity is just awful and disgusting but theres SO many times he seems to be rooting for them. like here how he Let Leo Go. he just let him leave. "he said he didnt wanna play so yknow. He Left." and he yells about how Of Course Hes Not Gonna Kill Leo. leo was so important to stopping the second collapse and femt just let him leave and then when he explained this to despair who is like Dude Why Didnt You Kill Him Or Leave Him There femt seems to be pretty genuinely concerned about despairs wellbeing and. general depression.

then there's in the ova where it's most obvious. hes running around trying to stop this restaurant from being destroyed which Just So Happens to have libra in it. tells leo to forget he was ever there. "i dont need a reason to help them out" femt i am shaking u

and THEN !!! theres curious. curious is fascinating to me for several reasons but i think its really interesting that femt seemingly shows up for no other reason than to Get Curious. wants to take him home for whatever reasons (i have thoughts on this but its too much so maybe another post). but then they immediately start fighting and it really seems like femt is just trying to keep curious preoccupied, buying time for libra to do something. he doesn't really have any reason to get into a petty fight with curious. then when curious is about to attack steven and klaus, femt IMMEDIATELY gets eve and odd to attack him which leaves them in pieces, ultimately ending up letting steven klaus and chain get the upper hand. and then femt just Leaves.

AND THE CALAMITY AUCTION !!! my favorite femt scene. pretends to be the president to break klaus out of jail as hes the only one who can really do anything about whats going on. and later when hes revealed to be the "president" klaus is surprised that someone like femt would even bother to get involved, cuz why WOULD he get involved?? hes constantly saying how worthless humanity is but here he is, actively trying to help. this pisses femt off who attacks briefly but just. Leaves. Again. destroys all the cameras in the room too. god forbid he be seen trying to help out a bad situation

which brings me to the light novel!! as i've said i've been translating it and theres a lot of interesting things. femt talks about how he feels extremely isolated from humanity and when people try to get information from him he just cant understand why they would ever want to be him or have what he has, cuz he clearly has..... Lots Of Issues! it's almost like he's so worried about what will happen to humanity if he isn't there to save them or on the other side of that he has to keep. testing humanity or something. he puts them through his games but even libra admits that theres a line he wont cross. they prefer to deal with him over Other Threats because while hes mass murdering lunatic he still wont. you know. Kill Everyone. unlike curious. i think femt and curious are being set up as foils and i have lots of thoughts on this but theres just too much to say about those two...

tldr i think femt cares a lot more about those around him than he would ever let anyone know. yeah he'll murder hundreds of people but the second hes faced with someone in person that he cant just pretend is part of this vague crude idea of humanity he has in his head its like something clicks in his brain that this is a Real Person and now he suddenly cares. he seems to have this recurring idea of humanity killing themselves or being unable to save themselves which leads him to Extreme Violence and when he helps its like he doesnt want to admit that he cares in some way. hes constantly distancing himself from everyone and i think he should go to therapy <3

[chichis-interlude]

Hi, how are you? Before I started talking I wanted to say that I don't know if it's right because I'm using the translator, well I'm going to try to summarize my story in the void I discovered the empty state a year ago and in that one year I tried and every time I failed and I don't know what else I do, my first attempt was using a sub but I got scared and ended up leaving more so I heard everything or my surroundings and the other times I ended up sleeping!! I wanted to enter the empty state sleeping but I don't know how and I don't know if I. I can get into the void today tomorrow or later !! Help me, please

Hey baddiee 🫶🏾🫶🏾

So first of we need to understand WHAT the void is.

I'm @ this site bc that's where I got the info from before even hopping onto Tumblr but if u don't wanna go read it ill break ts down.

The void is a deep meditative state when your MIND is awake but your BODY is asleep and according to those who have entered it, it's the most peaceful experience they've ever had.

So now that we know what it is. How the hell do we enter it?

There are many many ways to enter this state and you can find soooo many ways to do so on Tumblr, personally I reblog a lot of ways to do so and not every method will work for everyone so you just gotta do a lot of them then stick with the one that you're gut tells you. "yh it's this one right here."

But there are sm that you just see complicating it and you're just so confused and lost because you'll be thinking 'you're preaching that it's easy to enter but you're here making a whole ritual? Babes bfr'

And it's so flipping annoying seeing this bc all it those is make them look like liars when in fact it CAN BE SO EASY. But its only easy when you make it easy. If you out it on a pedestal when the void IS IN YOU it'll be way harder to enter. Not impossible but way harder.

So first you need to remember YOU are the void, and YOU control ts it does NOT control YOU.

Now for the methods

I'm a simple person and I hate complicated methods bc it makes the void seem like flipping Jesus when it's in fact just...you.

For example this relatively new method byv@luckykiwiii101 the distraction method. Is basically just distracting yourself from the 3D by imagining ANYTHING. It could be singing a song in your head or a mental movie or you can be counting or affirming like it DOESN'T MATTER, as long as you're body ain't moving but your brain still working it's ENOUGH. Just anything that will distract you enough for your body to fall asleep because thinking a lot will make your mind stay active and awake (FYI it's better to do this in a sleepy state and if yk you're gonna fall asleep, sit up while doing it)

Like there's literally nothing to it?? Just lay down (or sit up) and try not to move then just be thinking ab random things like? It's so flipping simple yet it's almost gotten me into the void??? (but my ass got distracted 😭).

Lols that's all I got for you bbg but just remember you are, you were and will always be that b and when you're that b everything else just falls into place.🤷🏾‍♀️.