#ive been doing that a lot lately. and i just wanted to talk about what ive thought about

[skunkes]

[wonder-worker]

Thinking about Elizabeth Woodville as a gothic heroine is making me go insane. She entered the story by overturning existing social structures, provoking both ire and fascination. She married into a dynasty doomed to eat itself alive. She was repeatedly associated with the supernatural, both in terms of love and death. Her life was shaped entirely by uncanny repetitions - two marriages, two widowhoods, two depositions, two flights to sanctuary, two ultimate reclamations, all paralleling and ricocheting off each other. Her plight after 1483 exposed the true rot at the heart of the monarchy - the trappings of royalty pulled away to reveal nothing, a never-ending cycle of betrayal and war, the price of power being the (literal) blood of children. She lived past the end of her family name, she lived past the end of her myth. She ended her life in a deeply anomalous position, half-in and half-out of royal society. She was both a haunting tragedy and the ultimate survivor who was finally free.

[quasieli]

I'm on day 5 of migraine hell and I've just been in bed all day while it's been storming outside, and just when I start to feel (physically) okay, I get hit by Big Sad.

[caffeinatedopossum]

People be like "merry Christmas" meanwhile I'm over here uncovering new depths of my trauma

[blu3berrydraws]

I'm glad to hear you're taking good care of yourself. It's not easy! And correct- that was not for the meme. Okay, here's for that: My opinion of you is that you seem to work very hard at honing your art in stylistic and skill-istic ways. I think you understand that your art is good, even when it "could be better," so I worry that you sometimes draw what will attract others because sadly, OC and older/more niche fandom art often fails to get spread around, even when it is drawn with dedication and skill. Of course, I could be wrong about your relationship to fanart- it's just an easy thing for artists to become reliant on the positive affirmation it brings. I've been in that boat and I could merely be projecting. All in all, I think you are a really special and sincere person- and you're pretty btw. Have a good day🐮

[phagodyke]

tried going to bed early bc ive just been sitting staring at the wall or my phone all afternoon but it's been 3 hours now and I can't stop crying. :(

[silverislander]

fully intended and foreseen consequence of coping better with my anxiety is that this blog will at some point inevitably become More Cringe and that point is SO close on the horizon. if you get mad at me for posting things i like on my blog that is for me you clearly have more issues than i do for worrying abt that possibility for hours on end

[readymades2002]

something difficult about writing/storytelling but only in short disconnected bursts is that writing anything longform is very difficult. there isn't as much time to practice long-term character development or subtlety (implying character instead of immediately clarifying) when its not really meant to go anywhere but a notes app. its a little frustrating...i'd love to do something more longform though. i've considered maybe just doing some short writing scenes in my various original universes a lot recently mostly because i just havent had time to draw anything fancy recently </3 maybe that would be something...

[a9saga]

the gazette - daku // no idea what this song's about but it sounds really sexy

[valleyyofthemoonnn]

you ever love people and humanity and the inherent Good of it so much it aches and hurts your heart , because you never see it. its never really been there for you to see it. you’ve only ever experienced the bad of it, but you’re so in love with the idea, you want to breathe and be alive just for the chance to see it ? you ever just do that?

[cherrylight]

hi.

i guess im going through some sort of healing era because ive realised so much shit and realised why things are so hard for me

one of the main ones is actually just having fun and enjoying things again and its been one of the most hardest things to ever do because to me its hard to have fun with anything i do... which may be why selfshipping lately hasnt been fun or it feels like a complete obstacle for me because im not having fun with it, not enjoying myself

like being immersive in anything is so difficult and relearning that its ok to well enjoy things and be a part of those things (ie: fandoms, selfshipping, etc) is difficult to accept but something i know is vital to accept to enjoy yourself upon doing anything

ive started writing out just small snippets of things, maybe ill start jotting down silly hcs or something idk. i wont share it until i feel as if im able to do so without second thought until then

[florida3exclamationpoints]

Hmmmmm I love being mentally ill

[where-does-the-heart-lie]

Revolutionary Army Punk AU

Ft: Luffy (not punk)

Steampunk is cool but i think just straight up punk would be cooler. I just think what they stand for lines up a lot better

Design notes:

I did some research and talked to a punk friend of mine for these as i am not a punk, myself, and I dont want to look like a poser. I think i did a really good job translating them and i want to explain my thoughts!

Sabo was first, of course.

I not only wanted to make the characters punk, but i also wanted to crank their designs up about 20 notches, so i gave Sabo’s scar one hell of an upgrade. In this version I tried to make it very clear that that cannon ball hit him head-on. I think it works really well with his punk vibes because under-cuts and shaved parts of the head in general are very popular in punk culture.

I largely tried to keep the silhouettes the same with this au, and It was really easy to keep it with Sabo because of the fact that he already has a lot of design elements that translate well to punk. His big pants into tall boots were perfect to translate, crust pants and steel toed boots fits him well. Trench coats arent a staple in Punk, but i couldnt take the coats away from him… him or Belo. They deserve it…

I threw away his cravat for a choker, i replaced his vest with a red tank top and his undershirt for fishnets, Patches up the wazoo, he looks very cool.

Belo Betty was next, she was super easy to translate. She’s already in the punk spirit with her tits out, we love to see it. Her hat was really difficult to translate, along with all the other hats, but a red knitted hat that has those two points cuz it’s essentially a scarf sewed together looks nice on her.

My punk friend suggested i give her a bunch of nets and harnesses and i really agreed that was her style, so i gave her red tie to Morley, slapped some harnesses on her and just overall just turned her sexy up like 50 notches. I think i was clever how i adapted her striped stockings here with how they have runs in them.

Karasu is almost the exact same. I just threw out his dinky little cravat and gave him a bandana and harness. I also gave him piercings. That’s the only difference. In the words of my Punk friend “hes naked and wearing a spiked mask, He can hang”

Speaking of what my punk friend said, he said that Lindbergh would get “demolished” in the pit, and that he looks like he’s scared of bees. The consensus was that he couldn’t hang. But also i still had to make him punk, so then he suggested CBGB punks:

Redneck, bluegrass, southern american punks. I was really in a rut with his design, I didn’t know what to do to keep the silhouette of his backpack. But everything changed when I chance got the idea of a guitar. And then everything flowed from there

Morley was really really fun. Punk friend suggested i make him Pop Punk, inspired by this pic

Mainly Lindsey way with this plaid skirt and tie

He was so so fun to draw, i love his fucked up eyes.

For dragon, i didnt change much at all, even though it’s only his bust that’s shown. Imagine everything is the same, except now he has piercings. Dragon isnt concerned with the punk fashion, but the punk cause.

For Luffy, I wasnt trying to make him punk, but he felt a bit plain looking like base Luffy next to punk Sabo, so i just did the “turn design up 20 notches”, and just gave him a more visibly tattered hat, bangles and waist beads.

That’s about it! Ive been getting a lot of comments and asks lately saying that you guys like when i go on my design explanations, and i realized that i didnt do that for the last few AU’s, so i thought id type this up :)

Thank you for reading!

[h0rr0rsaxo]

Real (a little rant of mine below, i start complaining on it so just.. ignore it lmfao)

I know life is full of goodbyes and hellos and sometimes you go away from people you love and sometimes they go away from you and that’s the way things are but I just hate it. I hate saying goodbye I hate letting go. I hate missing people.

[barcaatthemoon]

just a kid iv || alexia putellas x teen!reader ||

You go on a double date with Alexia and Olga.

Previous

"Mi amor, we are going to be late!" Carmen called out a she stepped into her bedroom. She looked around trying to find you, confused by the fact that you weren't where she had seen you last. Quietly, you stepped up behind her, having moved to the bathroom to finish up your hair.

"We'll be fine. Alexia tells me and Alba the wrong time every week because she thinks we'll be late," you said. Carmen jumped up as she turned around to face you. "How do I look jumpy?"

"Perfect." Carmen cupped your cheeks and leaned down to kiss you. You kissed her back a couple of times before pulling away. Carmen looked at you like a kicked puppy, but you had to keep going or else you'd never leave. Alexia was good about you dating Carmen, but she had set a lot of boundaries up with you staying over at Carmen's more and more.

The two of you arrived just 5 minutes after the time that Alexia had given you. Unsurprisingly, neither her nor Olga had gotten to the restaurant yet. Still, you and Carmen found a booth and ordered drinks while you waited for them to arrive. You were very caught up in playing with some of the rings on Carmen's hand, causing you to miss Alexia and Olga walking into the restaurant.

"They're adorable," Olga whispered as she tugged on Alexia's hand. "I don't think I've ever seen Chiqui look at anybody that way."

"Because she hasn't looked at anybody like that before. It's her first love, I think, I don't really know. We haven't really talked about relationships much, Irene and I kind of kept telling her that she was too young." Alexia hung her head shamefully. Olga nudged her forward, letting Alexia break your little bubble with Carmen. "Both hands on the table Chiqui."

"Alexia!" Both you and Olga hissed. You kicked at your captain while Olga swatted her shoulder. Alexia looked somewhat proud of herself, and you knew in that moment that she had been waiting to use that line. You rolled your eyes as you set the hand that had been on Carmen's knee onto the table.

"Stop teasing or they won't want to be around you," Olga scolded. Alexia rolled her eyes at the insinuation, knowing that you still had a couple of months before the club would let you move out of Alexia's apartment. The two of you had reached an agreement about time you were allowed to spend at Carmen's. Alexia gave you the two off days a week to go over there, and occasionally an extra one or two depending on how you had been at practice.

"What are you talking about? Carmen is mi amiga, she's got a good head on her shoulders. It's the other one we need to worry about," Alexia teased. You scoffed at that, although it wasn't necessarily untrue. You had always been a pretty decent kid, but next to Carmen, you looked like a delinquent. She was, as you had learned over the past year, a lot like Alexia.

It wasn't a bad thing. You helped Carmen to be a bit less uptight, and Carmen helped you stay on track. The two of you balanced each other out nicely, and it was something that everybody around the two of you were noticing quite a bit lately. Both your teammates and Carmen's liked to tease the two of you about it, as well as the fact that you had a hard time keeping your hands off of her. It wasn't in a sexual way, but rather that you found Carmen to be very physically comforting, despite her unwillingness to initiate PDA.

…

You happily took the last box from the back of Alexia's car. This was the day you had been waiting to come for weeks, moving day. You weren't sure how Olga managed to do it, but she convinced Alexia to let you move in with Carmen a whole two weeks earlier than originally planned. Technically, you were 18 now, but Alexia had been a stickler for all the paperwork that had been filled out when you originally signed with the club.

"Ale, come on, you knew this was happening. Besides, she's already been here all week. We're just bringing some of (Y/n)'s stuff." You could hear Olga comforting Alexia as the woman tried not to break down in the lobby. You could only imagine how much of a wreck she had been. Alexia loved you like you were her little sister, which you practically were. She had taken care of you for the past three years now, and it wasn't easy for either of you to leave each other. "Here, let me take that, and you talk to her, please."

"Um, okay," you agreed awkwardly. Once the box was in Olga's hands, Alexia was rushing over to hug you. "Where did this come from? You were practically trying to push me out of your place a week ago."

"It was hasty, and I'd like for you to come home now, I miss you," Alexia muttered sadly into your shoulder. You sighed as you pulled Alexia over to a bench by the elevators. "You just moved in with me, you can't leave so soon. What if you don't wake up on time for practice?"

"Ale, I am essentially moving in with a younger, hotter version of you. I will never be late for anything with Carmen there, trust me. If it would make you feel better, since I haven't gotten my license yet, you could take me to practice until I get it. Oh, and you'll still see me every week for dinner, Eli would kill me if I missed it," you told her. Alexia seemed to perk up a little, but you could tell that she was still extremely upset over you moving out.

"Will you come with me to brunch with Alba? Oh, and bring Carmen, I'd like to rub it in her face that she's single and we aren't."

"Alexia, be nice!" you scolded. Alexia pulled a face before both of you started laughing. "Yes, I'll bring Carmen with me to brunch with Alba. Now that we have that settled, can we please go upstairs? Alba and Carmen are working on dinner, and I am really hungry."

"Of course, come on kid." Alexia helped you up from the bench and kept her arm around your shoulders the whole way. You were barely an inch shorter than her, but Alexia acted as if you were half her height. You knew that it didn't matter how old you got or how far you went in life, you'd always been the same scared little kid that Alexia had met your first practice.

[phagodyke]

venting sorry... don't want to just delete it bc it helps to get it out just ignore this post pls 👍

haven't slept much at all and feeling so sick andstressed and in pain bc my period is due and so tired its making me dizzy but i cant sleep more or ill just feel more sick and I want a hug and to cry so hard into someones shoulder but no one cares or will even come near me it makes me feel diseased they think things about me that aren't true bc I struggle so much to communicate and thry all make assumptions insteqd and no one wants to give me space to talk to them about it so I cant undo that now and its all my fault and I'm so. exhausted :-(