#but with me getting. so many new friends lately ive rlly been wanting to sit down and do this again

[gemharvest]

FUCK it's a "I love my friends so much it hurts" kinda night. This is bad bc I should really be winding down rn.

[wienerbarnes]

Italian Heart

Pairing: Bucky x Italian!MobBoss!Reader

Word Count: 4,867

Warnings: canon level violence, possible inaccurate italian slang lol

A/N: ive been watching a lot of the sopranos lately and i feel like ive never seen a bucky x mob boss reader au (ive only rlly seen em where buckys the mob boss. if there are ones where reader is the mob boss PLS SEND EM TO ME I BEG) a lot of the slang and mob stuff here is from sopranos bc... im not in the fucking mafia so forgive me anyway enjoy :)<3

MAIN MASTERLIST

Bucky’s never seen a woman quite like yourself.

Dressed in expensive satin and jewelry that hangs between your breasts, an angry look on your face at the fact you’re sitting before him and Sam in an interrogation room in the tower. Freshly done nails, clean and crisp lipstick, spicy perfume, and an expression of annoyance.

As put together as you look, you don’t look like someone to be fucked with. Which, he supposes is good for a mobster; the Boss of Newark.

Looking at you, though, he’d never thought you to be such a figure of intimidation. While the mafia is still alive, despite how the media tries to deny this, he always pictured an old Italian man that chain smokes cigars. He doesn’t think he’s too far off, to his credit; he can smell the remnants of smoke on you.

“Mind if we make this fast? My cousin’s comin’ for dinner and I was gonna make ziti.” You huff, crossing your legs under the table.

“Sounds delicious. Sorry for dragging you all the way out here.” Sam says, a calm look on his face even though he’s well aware of what you’re capable of.

When hunting down the last traces of the super soldier serum, he never thought Nick Fury himself would suggest getting in touch with you. He didn’t think it was worth the time to question how the two of you knew each other.

Theft. Drugs. Murder. Bribery. The list goes on, and there’s not a single thing that ties you to any of it.

A shrug of your shoulders, “So, what exactly is this about?” You ask.

“What is it that you do for a living?” Sam asks.

“I work in waste management.” You respond, a rehearsed answer.

Not exactly a lie, the environmental facility you manage is one of hundreds of covers used by your crew for your crimes. Environmental facilities, deli shops, strip clubs, auto shops. There isn’t a business in Jersey you aren’t tied to.

“Waste management? Like, garbage disposal?” Bucky asks, knowing exactly what it is you do for work.

You smirk, “Yeah, we dispose of garbage sometimes. What’s that got to do with me being here?”

“It’s to my understanding that you’re in the business of… buying and selling things. You and… the people you hang around got a real knack for it.” Sam tells you.

Bucky holds back a roll of his eyes. More like stealing and selling. Expensive Italian suits, antique watches, cars, electronics, illegal cigars. Who knows what else.

“I don’t know where you heard that… but I’m a popular gal, maybe I know a guy who might know a guy. What are you lookin’ for?” You ask.

You know this game, after being in the mob for so long. After being a part of your own crew for years, your patience and hard work paid off, working your way up to a captain and finally a boss. It didn’t take you long to learn in this business that government officials are jokes. Always wanting to bust my balls and then come crying to my corner for help, it’s a bunch of ugatz.

“Serums.” Bucky finally speaks.

A laugh escapes you, “What, like vitamin C?” You teasingly smirk at him.

His chair makes a loud sound in the small room as he pushes it back harshly and stands, resting his hands on the table in between the two of you. You don’t flinch.

“Enough with the bullshit. Super serums. To create super soldiers. We need to get them before they end up in the wrong hands and make a big ass mess.” He snaps at you, but you don’t seem phased in the slightest. In fact, you seem rather amused.

“You must have a lot of agita with all that anger, Sergeant Barnes.”

He doesn’t hold back this time and rolls his eyes before you speak up again, “Your first name is James, isn’t it? Ain’t that Italian?”

“No, it’s English. Or Scottish. Or Jewish - I don’t know, who cares? Are you gonna help us or not?” Bucky takes his seat again, crossing his thick arms over his broad chest.

“What’s in it for me?” You ask, leaning back in your chair.

“Not being arrested for all the shit we know you’re caught up in.” Sam offers.

You roll your own eyes this time, “I’ll take my chances. Thanks for wasting my time, boys, don’t let it happen again.” You stand, prepared to make your way back to the train station to go back to Jersey.

“Wait,” Sam stops you, “What is it that you want?”

You smile innocently and take your seat again, taking a minute to think before answering, “My little sister’s a big fan of yours. I’m sure she and all her friends would think it’s cool if you showed up to her prom as her date.” You wink at Sam.

Silence fills the room as the men think about your request.

“You’re gonna do it, right?” Bucky looks over at him and sees Sam rubbing the crease in between his eyes. He was expecting you to ask for immunity, protection, money, guns. But after hearing your request, he supposes you have enough of all that stuff anyway.

“Man -” Sam begins to refuse.

“Sam, it’s a fucking school dance in exchange for some of the most powerful and sought after serums on the planet - go to the fucking prom.” He tells him, eyebrows scrunching in confusion as to how he would hesitate on something so simple.

“She’s eighteen, so you won’t have any problems with the media or none of that.” You add, the information not really making Sam feel any better.

“Alright, alright, fine. I’ll go to the dance with your sister if you help us get these serums.”

You smile, happy to have done business with the two men, “What information do ya got for me?”

…

Bucky and Sam wait outside a back room in the facility you own. They passed the garbage trucks parked neatly outside, but could hear your screaming and the smell of Cuban cigars as soon as they entered the building.

She’s with a customer, they were told, by someone in your crew, them meeting Bucky’s expectations for mobsters more than you did. None of them ask any questions, but Bucky and Sam aren’t stupid, they’re sure your crew is aware of what’s going on and know the exact reason they’re there.

“You’re a fuckin’ asshole, you know that? The Bible says, Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit -”

“You listen to me, you take your Bible and your quotations book and shove it up your fat fucking ass! Now get the fuck out of my face!”

Bucky can’t help but scoff listening to you scream at whoever’s inside. Sam elbows him, silently telling him that now isn’t the time to find your work funny, especially not in front of the rest of your crew.

Bucky knows he’s old-fashioned, and while things that were taboo such as body modifications or certain fashion styles don’t phase him anymore, he doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to hearing a woman talk like that. He doesn’t think he’s ever even heard anybody talk like you do.

Suddenly a man bursts out of the room, huffing and puffing, and you walk slowly behind him, as if to make sure he makes it outside okay.

“Grab his plate for me, will you?” You say not to anyone in particular, voice smooth and calm as if you hadn’t been yelling and threatening that man’s life for the past twenty minutes.

One of the men from your crew follows outside, seemingly to collect the license plate of the man who just left.

“Nothing’s gonna happen to that guy, right?” Sam asks as he and Bucky enter the room, taking a seat in front of the desk you have in there. He knows there’s no point in asking, that you’ll do whatever you want regardless because it’s obvious you’re passionate about receiving respect, but it was worth a shot.

“Is that what you came all the way to Jersey to ask me? Christ, I’m fuckin’ starving, you boys want anything to eat?” You ask, accent heavy as you reach into the side drawer of your desk and pull out what seems to be some kind of meat wrapped in paper.

“Gabagool?” You offer to them, picking out a slice for yourself and placing it in your mouth.

“Gesundheit.” Sam responds.

“It’s pork, you asshole.”

Bucky silently reaches over and picks off a slice of the cured cold cut, putting the meat in his mouth and savoring the flavor. While he can’t stand the way you make a living or the sailor’s mouth you have, he loves Italian food, and actually chose a neighborhood in New York that has plenty of traditional cold cut markets and restaurants to live in in order to fulfill his cravings.

“There’s a big party staged downtown this weekend, we think that’s when the drop is going to happen.” Sam tells you, bringing the focus to their reason for coming here in the first place.

“I’ll send one of my boys.” You reply in between your chews.

“That wasn’t the deal. The deal was you get the serums.” Bucky speaks up.

“Buck, you know how many people want her dead?” Sam tries to reason.

“What the fuck do I have a crew for then? - No, if pretty boy wants me to do it myself, then I will. The same people that want my head are the same fucks who are terrified to be within twenty feet of me in fear they’ll make eye contact. I’m not scared of nothin’.” You say, narrowing your eyes at Bucky.

“What did you guys come here to talk about?” You ask.

Sam looks confused at your expression, “...To go over the plan? Hash out details? So you know how everything’s gonna go?”

“I’ll be fine; I’ve seen The Godfather once or twice,” You tell him, wrapping up the cappo, after Bucky picks off one last slice, and replacing it in the drawer, “Don’t worry Captain, this ain’t my first rodeo. I’ll get the serums for you.” You open a different drawer and pull out a cigar and a lighter.

Bucky watches as you place the large cigar in between your red-painted lips, bringing the flame of your lighter to the end and hollowing your cheeks until smoke exits from the corner of your mouth. Bucky feels blood travel south as his eyes glaze over your hand grab the cigar out of your mouth and blow out a long string of smoke.

“I guess we’ll be in touch then,” Sam stands and Bucky follows after.

“My sister’s wearing blue, so find yourself a nice tie.” You call out, lifting your feet up to cross them on the desk, dress rising and showing your legs.

Bucky blushes, and then laughs as he exits when he hears you, in a deep and more exaggerated accent than your own, “Just when I thought I was out… they pull me back in!”

…

The morning of the party, Sam and Bucky pick you up from your house, planning to take you into New York to discuss final details before tonight.

You get in the passenger seat, Sam offering it to you and climbing in the backseat. As Bucky begins to drive off, your phone rings.

“I told you to leave that.” Bucky says, telling you explicitly to leave electronics here to prevent anyone finding out where you are, and also to avoid any distractions.

“Wanted to see what you’d about it, Sarge,” You wink at him, pulling out a flip phone and answering the call.

“Yeah… Uh huh… He what? Are you fucking kidding me?... Alright… Tell him not to move a fucking muscle.” You hang up, slamming the phone closed.

“Stop at the facility for a sec, I gotta take care of something.” Bucky sighs and turns away from the route to head to your facility.

“Bucky’s going to be going with you tonight, by the way, he’ll be in disguise. Just in case anything goes wrong.” Sam tells you, not really caring anymore about having to make a stop for you to take care of whatever business you need to take care of.

Your only response is a hum as Bucky can feel the anger radiating off your now tense body.

You slam the car door shut as Bucky parks behind a garbage truck outside, not even waiting for him to fully put the car in park before you exit.

Him and Sam follow quickly behind you to see what’s going on. You enter through a side door that leads to a large room, a garage for the trucks, Bucky assumes.

There’s a large truck inside, and racks of suits wrapped in plastic scattered around. A younger man stands near the truck as your crew peruses around the racks, he couldn’t be older than twenty-five years old. Your heels click on the ground as you approach, slowing down as you glance between the suits and the young man. Bucky and Sam hang around a few feet behind your trail.

You stop, fuming, staring at the man before you speak, “You wanna tell me what the fuck happened?”

“I -” He begins, but you cut him off, raising an open hand at him.

“Actually, I don’t even want to hear your fucking voice right now. Because if what I heard you did is true; if what you did to Vinny’s guy is true, you’re gonna be a fuck load of trouble.”

“Can I -”

“Shut the fuck up.”

“But -”

“I said shut the fuck up, Christopher! What part of that don’t you understand?” You yell, and even Bucky feels intimidated.

You turn to your crew, “What the fuck happened.” You demand, more than ask.

“Kid says he tried to take the truck, Vinny’s guy had a gun that fell outta the seat, went off, shot him.” One of the men summarizes, not looking up from the rack of suits.

You raise a manicured hand to pinch between your eyes, “You keep me skinny, Christopher, with all the fucking stress you cause me.”

“Would you let me explain?” He tries.

“If you don’t do as I told you and shut your fucking mouth, you’re gonna be buried with two assholes,” You threaten before continuing.

“They were fuckin’ suits! All you had to do was take the truck! How did you fuck that up -” You stop yourself and sigh, attempting to calm yourself down.

“Here’s what’s gonna happen. You’re gonna take all this shit, you’re gonna take it back to Vinny, and you’re gonna tell him what happened yourself.” You finish.

“Marone!” He exclaims, rubbing his face with his hands.

“Enough with the theatrics! You’re lucky I don’t put a bullet in your ass! Now, I don’t see you grabbing that rack and that rack and that rack and putting it back in the truck!” You wave your arms around the room.

The kid sighs and begins grabbing the racks one by one and rolling them back in the truck.

“Would it be such a shame if they all went back?” An older man from your crew asks, already wearing one of the expensive suits. You scoff and laugh.

“Bucky, pick yourself somethin’ nice for tonight,'' You turn to face him, and he jumps at the sound of your now calmer voice being directed at him, as opposed to the harsh one used on Christopher, “On me.” You wink.

...

Sam and Bucky sit on the bed and watch as you get ready. A small apartment near the party that’s already been swept for bugs. A favor, you called it, from someone you know.

They don’t question it.

“You and Bucky will go in together and I’ll be waiting at a secondary location watching and listening to everything.”

Bucky can’t tear his eyes away from your dress. A mermaid dress, he thinks it is, black and tight and hugging you in all the right places, curving around your ass and sleeveless at the top, allowing you to show off a nice necklace and your cleavage. It’s an understatement to say that he’ll enjoy accompanying you tonight, even if it’s in a costume.

His mother probably would’ve loved it if he would’ve gotten with someone like you. Someone who loves their family, a spitfire that wouldn’t take any of his shit, and whose god damn gorgeous. She might’ve had to wash your mouth out with soap, though.

“So, why is Bucky goin’ again?”

“Safety.” Bucky answers.

“Is he going for my safety or am I going for his?” You tease, finishing the last few curls of your hair, smoke coming from the iron after each time you pull your hair away from it.

“Once you find our guy, get talking with him and see if you can get him to make you an offer,” He begins.

“One I can’t refuse?”

“Then, you’ll try and get him alone, see if he’ll show you the serums, and once you do, we’ll be taking care of the rest.” Sam finishes explaining.

Bucky plucks a box from his pocket and opens it to reveal a pair of diamond earrings. One, a camera, and the other, a microphone. You’re also given a comm to hide in your ear so both him and Sam can hear everything and you can hear them.

“Easy - peasy.” You respond.

The ballroom is lively, loud music and people everywhere, and Bucky attunes all the action overwhelming him to a sweat and not that fact that you’re pressed up against him, his arm wrapped around your waist.

About a hundred different people come up to greet you, asking about your family, offering you drinks and food. Bucky can see right through all of them though; they’re all putting on the act out of fear. Everyone’s attention is on you, and Bucky’s sure if he wasn’t in disguise right now, no one would even notice.

You bring him to the middle of the crowd and he can’t be surprised when you start to dance with him, pulling at his arms to get him to loosen up. He complies, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you close as the two of you move together.

“I’ll let you know when I spot him.” He tells you, voice causing goosebumps to rise on your neck; goosebumps that he notices but doesn’t point out.

It only takes a song or two before he spots who he’s looking for and sends you over, making sure your com is on, and choosing to stick by the bar, giving him a good view of you and allowing himself a break of having your body pressed against his.

He’s impressed listening to you talk to this guy, voice smooth and sultry, yet still commanding.

He knows there was a lot of talk when you took position as boss; not a lot of people in the mob took you seriously and didn’t think you or a woman in general would be good in that kind of position in power. So, you use that to your advantage to get shit done, and Bucky applauds you for that.

It’s not long before the guy offers to go somewhere more private to discuss business and Bucky follows far behind, Sam praising you through the coms from where he waits in the car outside, watching through the camera in your earring.

Bucky waits outside of a closed office door upstairs, listening to the conversation through the coms but hearing your exclamation through the door when the guys give you his asking price.

“5 mil each?! What do you take me for, some kinda stunad?”

“Take it or leave it.”

“Take it or leave it, yeah, I can put a bullet between your eyes and take it, alright.”

“Stop messing around and take the offer, it’s not real anyway!” Sam tells you, not wanting to lose their chance on the serums.

You ignore him prioritizing your need for respect over the stupid mission, “How do I know these aren’t Kool-Aid pouches poured in glass bottles?”

“Well, I’m certainly not going to test ‘em out for you.” The guy scoffs.

“Stronzo. You’re outta your fucking mind offering me that.”

“I’ll lower the price for you if you give me a little dance, how ‘bout that?”

“Vaffanculo.” You curse at him.

“Up yours, lady!” He yells back, and Sam sees through the camera, he grabs at you.

“Buck, get in there.” Sam tells him, and it only takes Bucky a second to kick open the door.

He’s a bit taken aback when he not only sees the case of serums out on the table, but you holding the man bent over the small table in the middle of the room next to the serums, gun held to the back of his head.

He very quickly decides that you’re fine and moves to grab the serums, closing the case and holding it securely in his left hand.

“Don’t kill the guy.”

You stay silent and Bucky looks at you again. He can almost see the steam coming out of your ears and he notices a small cut on your cheek bone. He looks down to the man’s cowering figure and notices a large ring on his hand.

You mumble something in Italian to the man, a threat of some kind that Bucky can guess given how the man shuts his eyes and shakes a bit under your hold. Sam finally enters the room, military grade handcuffs in hand.

“Feds are on their way, get her out of here.” He tells Bucky.

You slowly lift the gun off the man’s head and stand up straighter, walking over to brush past Bucky in the direction of the back door.

He makes eye contact with Sam and gives him a nod before following after you, watching as you scrunch up the bottom of your dress to replace the gun in an ankle holster. Once outside, he stops you under a street light near the car and raises his hand to look at your cheek.

“We gotta get going,” You swat at his hand.

“You’re still bleeding.” He says, using his thumb to brush away the line of blood, smearing a red tinge on your skin.

He looks into your eyes and for a second he sees the tough exterior drop. The face of someone who got smacked across the cheek all for mouthing off at some asshole.

Your vulnerability doesn’t last long, though, as you sniff and walk towards the car, opening the passenger door and sitting inside before Bucky can make it over there to open the door for you.

The drive back to the apartment is silent, and Bucky doesn’t know what to do or say to fill the silence. Stepping into the apartment, you immediately go to change and collect your things. Bucky moves to the bathroom to look for a first aid kit of some kind.

He meets you in the room and you’re now in cotton pants and a large t-shirt, sandals on your feet showing the bright red color of your toenails and the lines indented in your skin from how tight your heels were. You’re hanging up the dress and zipping it back in the cover when Bucky drops the first aid kit on the bed.

“Christ, it’s only a small cut.” You mumble.

“Just - Let me, would you?”

He takes out the liquid of disinfectant and soaks a cotton pad, cleaning off your cheek bone with it before covering it with healing ointment and a bandaid.

You don’t thank him when he finishes and he huffs as he closes the kit, “When do you drop the act, huh?”

“I don’t.”

“Really?” Bucky asks in annoyed disbelief.

“No. People tend to try and have me whacked when I drop the act.”

He sighs, “So, what, nobody ever takes care of you? Treats you? You don’t have any days off? Time to be yourself?”

“This lifestyle doesn’t really allow me to have days off, Sergeant Barnes.” You snap, gathering the dress in your hands and turning to face him completely.

“Take me home, I’m tired and my feet hurt.”

You leave him in the room and he waits an extra few seconds before dropping the conversation and following you out.

...

Bucky opens the back door to the environmental facility with his right hand and sees the door to your office open, you and your crew sitting together surrounded by cigar smoke and he can hear a TV on.

“Sir, please step into the vehicle.”

“Like the cop would be callin’ this asshole Sir if the fuckin’ cameras weren’t around!” You wave a hand at the TV, not yet seeing Bucky standing there.

He finds it funny that the gnarliest criminals - the literal Mafia - spend their time watching shitty, scripted cop shows.

It’s been about two weeks since the mission with you where you retrieved the serums. Sam went to prom with your sister five days ago, which was hilarious for him, especially when he got photo prints of different sizes in the mail at his apartment. He didn’t bother thinking about how you found his address.

One of the men sitting next to you glances his way and sees him standing there, smirking at the vision of him; hair combed slightly back and to the side, and a large bouquet of flowers in his right hand and a small paper box in his left.

“You got company, Boss.” He says.

You look over to the doorway and your jaw drops in an open-mouthed smile.

“Look at googootz! Now this is a man that knows how to treat a lady, are you boys paying attention?” You tease, scurrying over to him and pinching one of his cheeks, resting your free hand on his large bicep to guide him into the room, the rest of your crew ushering out to give the two of you privacy.

“What’s in the box?”

“Cannoli.”

You throw your head back with an exaggerated moan, “You know the way to an Italian woman’s heart, Sergeant Barnes. What’s with all the gifts?”

“Thought I’d treat you.” Is all his response is.

You narrow your eyes at him and stand up a little straighter, crossing your arms over your chest.

The last conversation before he dropped you off that night hasn’t escaped his mind. He understands the difficulties of life - how it’s hard to find time for yourself among the busy schedule that is existing. He catches himself sometimes, too, forcing his body to run with no sleep, burning through all of his energy until he’s completely drained and blaming it on life.

But life’s not always like that. Life allows for days off. For treats. For a bit of kindness. And Bucky’s come to show you just that.

“What, a beautiful woman like you never received flowers and pastries before?” He says, taking a half-step forward to be close enough to look you closer in the eyes.

“Are you flirting with me?” You whisper in amusement.

His eyes glance away from yours to look down at your red-painted lips. He gives you a shy smirk, really turning up the charm. For a big, bad, boss, you’re pretty easy to break down.

“Let me take you out tonight.”

“Maybe I’ve got plans.”

“Cancel ‘em.”

“What makes you think you’re worth canceling plans for?”

“Why don’t you trust me and find out?”

“You should know by now, Sergeant Barnes, that I don’t trust.”

He doesn’t respond for a moment, setting the box of cannoli on your desk before reaching his now free hand up to your face, using his finger to brush away a stray hair and push it behind your ear.

He then takes a hold of one of your hands, turning it over to place a kiss on the top of it, before wrapping your fingers around the flowers in his other hand, forcing you to take them.

“No restaurant you’ve been to a hundred times over, no drama, no business. Just a man trying to treat a lady.” You look down at the flowers before meeting his eyes again.

“I get to pick the place.”

“No.”

“The kind of food.”

“No.”

“The -”

“No. Let me take care of everything.” Bucky insists, determined to get you to give up control for the first time in what he can only imagine has been a very long time.

Bucky knows better than anyone how terrifying it is to give up control. It was terrifying when he was forced to give up control, his free will taken away from him in the war for decades upon decades, but it’s terrifying even now when he has to do it as a free man. It makes a person vulnerable. When was the last time you were allowed to be vulnerable for somebody?

“I’m gonna pick you up here at six. Wear something nice and leave the executive attitude at home.” He finishes, leaving you with the flowers and cannoli before returning back outside, ignoring the stares he receives from you crew who wait patiently outside your office.

He feels your eyes follow him at the door, and he can’t wait to sweep you off your feet tonight.

[pluviophile-imagines]

LOWI CONGRATS ON THE FOLLOWER MILESTONE!! 🥺💞💞💞 u deserve it and so much more!! for the kiss prompt could i get 18 with shinsou ?? 🥺👉👈

TYSM SOFFFF so uh. I’ve been fuckin stupid dkfnskfb my dumbass rlly wrote Shinsou correctly on my master post like a week ago and then still managed to write for Shigaraki instead when it came to the actual piece 😳 so thanks to my handyman brainrot you get two—that’s right, two!—characters for the price of one ur welcome ♥️ I cheated a lil bit so shinsou;s not sitting in the reader’s lap it’s just his head but i think its cute 🥺 also Shiggy’s is like twice as long as ive been trying to write them oops i rlly like the jealous reader premise 👉👈 it’s under the read more bc of that and bc of kiiiinda spoilers? if yall arent caught up to the manga you won’t get it but if u are it’s canonical. Whew that was a lot! Enjoy!

Kisses where one person is sitting in the other’s lap

Shinsou

To say that your relationship with Shinsou is new would be an understatement. You’ve been friends for years—ever since the third year of high school when you’d been assigned to him as his support—but you’ve never been particularly close until recently when you’d once again found yourself working on his hero costume and support items.

He’d only asked you out yesterday after nearly two months of tension-filled glances and fleeting touches. Now, the two of you are watching a movie at your mutual friend Kirishima’s apartment, sitting quite awkwardly on a loveseat and pretending like you don’t want to get closer to each other. You haven’t told your friends yet about your new relationship status, but that’s not entirely what’s holding you two back. If anything, it’s run-of-the-mill first date awkwardness (if watching a movie with six of your closest friends around can be considered a date), too afraid to initiate anything.

The movie’s dull; the two of you have pulled out your phones to snark at each other through text, a strategy you’d begun weeks ago after being hushed one too many times by Kaminari because you were talking too loudly. The bright screens probably aren’t all that much better, but you two are in the back anyway; nobody can see it unless they turn away from the TV.

You risk a glance up and end up locking eyes with Shinsou. Your face heats up, heartbeat quickening, as he gives you a charming smile. You watch him glance around the room, unsure at first why he’s doing it until he turns his attention back to you and slowly, silently, moves over across the loveseat into your personal space.

Your legs are touching now, faces so close your nose is nearly brushing his. One of his hands has come to brace against the armrest you’re leaning on, allowing him to stay leaning in.

“Hey,” he says, little more than a whisper and clearly hushed so the others don’t hear.

“Hey yourself,” you respond, earning yourself a low snort.

Instead of vocally responding, he pushes himself back up to a sitting position and then moves his hands to maneuver your legs until you’re no longer curled up against the couch’s backing but sitting like a normal person.

Then he lays down, head resting on your thighs, and turns to face the movie.

You’re grinning uncontrollably. All possible self-conscious thoughts of the others seeing you are dashed from your mind; you like the weight of him in your lap too much.

You spend much of the rest of the movie like that, easily over half an hour. A few minutes in he reaches down to find your hand and bring it to his hair, encouraging you to stroke it. It’s even softer than you’ve imagined in the past, fluffy and thick and genuinely nice to run your hands though. There’s a surge of contentment that rushes through you, and maybe a little bit of pride at the knowledge that you can do this pretty much any time you want now.

By the end of the film, you’re pretty sure Shinsou’s fallen asleep. He gives you the scare of your life, however, when he grabs your arm as you’re trying to pull away. His eyes open, purple irises trained on you.

What happens next you blame on grogginess, him still not quite being awake. He blames it on you; whenever you mention it, he says he saw you and had become consumed with an overwhelming desire to just lean up and kiss you. Whatever the reason, it’s nice for you.

His hand comes up to the back of your neck, tugging you down just as much as he lifts up. It begins soft, kind of sweet, just lips as the two of you melt into each other—but it doesn’t stay that way for long. Within moments the two of you morph the kiss from a quick peck after a movie to a very passionate makeout, and frankly you’d be more concerned if they hadn’t interrupted the two of you.

You pull away when you hear Kaminari’s wolf whistle, left sitting on the loveseat with a burning face and your boyfriend in your lap, still half asleep.

Shigaraki

You’re not jealous.

No, you’ve been dating Tomura for months. You can’t be jealous when he’s, well, yours, and has been for quite some time. You’re his first relationship, his first everything, and it’s frankly foolish of you to feel this insecure just because some floozy is simpering at him from across the enormous room where you and the rest of the League are scattered about. It’s not like she really wants him, or even knows him; he’s just the hew big-shot leader and she’s decided being his lover sounds good. Too bad that role’s already taken.

Still, there’s a sinking feeling in your chest—an ache in your heart, a burning lump in your throat—that says now that Tomura is Grand Commander he’ll drop you for someone better.

You don’t realize you’re glaring daggers at the woman until she catches your eye. She has no business looking that smug; the only reason she’s allowed in the room is to give Tomura reports. You’re the one lounging next to him as she approaches; he has your legs over his lap, his thumb absent-mindedly rubbing circles on your thigh.

And when she bends down to drop the report on his lap (as if your damn legs aren’t there, you want to scoff) she draws the eyes of every League member except the one she wants, because you’re the one who has Tomura’s attention.

He’s wearing Father, but you’ve long passed being afraid when he looks at you from between those lifeless digits and you can see the expression beneath; those lips tugging down slightly in a pout, brow furrowed, eyes far softer than they have any damn business being while hiding behind the severed hand of his old man. He’s concerned, and a little confused.

Tomura plucks the report from your legs and sets it aside, reaching to pull you fully into his lap. To your surprise he takes Father off, too; he buries his face into your neck to prevent the outsider from seeing, lips just brushing your ear so that you can hear him.

“What’s wrong?”

“Hm?”

“You’ve been pouting ever since the secretary came in, brat.”

Like hell you’re saying anything in front of her. You remain stubbornly silent.

He doesn’t like that, you can tell, but while the secretary’s interest is lost on him he knows you well enough to tell that you’re uncomfortable with her. Presumably that’s why he doesn’t press the issue and kisses you instead.

You don’t expect it. Tomura’s not exactly one to shy away from PDA (you’re sitting in his lap in front of the whole League, for fuck’s sake), but intimacy is something he’s never wanted to take beyond closed doors. When he’s in a sour mood you’ll kiss him sometimes, even in public (he’s invigorated by your affection in many way, but never anything you’d call heated.

This kiss, though, is. It’s anything but chaste, perhaps even downright lewd. He’s all but initiating a makeout with you while Miss Secretary is standing right there. Maybe his affection-motivated ways are rubbing off on you, but it helps more than it probably ought to.

You’re dazed by the time he pulls away. The sound of the door slamming closed snaps you from your trance. The secretary, ploy foiled simply by your annoyed expression, had left. It doesn’t matter. None of this was ever really about her in the first place.

“There,” Tomura says, audibly quite pleased with himself. “She’s gone. Now tell me what’s wrong.”

You sigh, leaning in to tuck your own head into his shoulder. Your voice is muffled when you speak, quiet so that only he can hear.

“It’s dumb.”

“It’s bothering you,” he says simply. There’s an underlying statement there: tell me so I can destroy it for you. In many ways, Tomura is a predictable man.

You know he’s not going to drop it, so you accept your fate. “She was making a pass at you.”

He tenses beneath you, holding you closer. You risk lifting your head from where it’s buried to see the way his nose is scrunched up. “She wasn’t.”

“Yeah, she was.”

There’s a pause, like he’s processing everything you’re saying. Then, seemingly finally registering what exactly is bothering you, his hands move to grip your hips and maneuver you to straddle him, sitting fully on his lap facing him. “Fine. Why’re you pissed about it, then?”

You lean in again, arms coming to wrap around his neck as you bury your face into his chest and try to ignore the tears that are coming. You’d never be able to live it down if any of the others saw you crying over the fucking secretary.

But you know more than anyone thanks to many late nights assuring your boyfriend he’s the only one for you that Tomura can empathize with this insecurity. It’s a little strange how the script has flipped.

“She’s a high ranking MLA member, she probably has some crazy strong quirk. I’m quirkless. I dunno. I guess I’m scared you’ll drop me for someone like her. Like I said, it’s dumb.”

He doesn’t speak for a moment. You sit there, listening to his heartbeat and matching your breathing to his. Then he speaks.

“Your emotions aren’t dumb. It’s okay that you’re feeling this way. Thank you for telling me.” He’s parroting you, you realize; this is what you tell him every time he comes to you for comfort when he’s gotten in a mood. You feel a little fuzzy, warmth flooding your chest. “But I think we both know they’re irrational.”

“Tomura… I—”

“I’m not interested in some lame-ass NPC,” he interrupts, no hesitation and entirely sincere. He doesn’t even need to think about it. “You’re my player two, my endgame. The only thing in this world worth protecting. You really think that secretary can hold a candle to you? I didn’t even notice her. Why would I when you’re here?”

You can’t help it, you surge upward and kiss him, just as passionately as he had you mere moments before. His right hand traces up your spine to find the back of your neck and pull you closer, sending a thrill through your body as your own arms tighten around him.

“Oi! Horndogs! Get a damn room, don’t make us see that!”

You break away at Dabi’s words, panting slightly, and if the sincerity of Tomura’s little rant hadn’t convinced you that his words were true, the look of utter adoration he’s regarding you with would have.

[yolkyeomie]

Ice Fairies | Hwang Hyunjin

summary — figure skaters are like ice fairies to you, and hyunjin is the prettiest fairy you’ve ever seen

word count — 2.7k words

pairing — hyunjin x gender neutral!reader

genre — figure skater!hyunjin, fluff, mc kinda pines after hyunjin but doesn’t rlly realize it

disclaimer — I actually know nothing about ice skating and ive been writing this since the moment I woke up so if it’s bad + inaccurate I’m so sorry

You had always enjoyed watching figure skaters be in their natural element, it was something about the way they skid across the ice that made you think that there was just something a little… inhuman about them.

If you were to describe what you believe they were, you say they were like fairies. The way figure skaters glittered in the reflection of the ice and the way they glided as if they had wings sprouting it from their back to fly was enough for you to think they were. But that was only from what you had seen on television. You had never seen a figure skater in person because it was wildly out of your own element to do so. And then a few months ago happened.

One day a stranger strolled into your town. It wasn’t an unlikely sight, your town was a frequent resting place for travelers. But the thing about the stranger is that when they strolled into town they didn’t feel like a stranger. In fact, they felt like they belonged. That’s something I’ve been missing in your town and the stranger had suddenly filled up the gaping hole you didn’t know needed to be filled. You thought you were just being delusional, there is no way such a strange person could make you feel this way? A person you’ve never seen in your life?

But then on a very chilly, very quiet winter day you decided to take a walk to your job. You don’t know what inclined you to do so, the weather was close to being unbearable and the ice and snow were thick on the ground from the snow storm before. But you did anyways as if you were challenging mother nature to try and stop you.

When you walk to your unbearable nine to five, there is a big lake that’s usually within your sights then. Because of the conditions beforehand it had turned into this icy winter wonderland, where the water was frozen solid and hard enough for people to walk across. It wasn’t unusual to see parents taking their bundle of children to go skating across it for fun family bonding, or see teenagers push each other towards the slick frozen over waters, so you paid no mind to it at first. But on your walk you saw something... different.

There was the stranger rhythmically moving his feet left and right, his jet black ice skates kicking up little chips and the frozen lake. He wasn’t wearing much to protect himself from the cold: just a throw on jacket and what looked to be sort of loose fitting pants. And don’t forget the low ponytail he wore his blonde hair in, the most recognizable of his lazy attire.

Why you thought he was going to freeze to death out on the lake at first.

Your brain had started functioning on its own, making decisions you weren’t fully comprehending when they happened. Before you know it, instead of being on your path to your boring nine to five, you were sliding down the side of the hill, careful not to let the snow trip you up, and calling out to him to make sure he was okay. When you had finally made it to the edge of the lake, your feet threatening to tip over and slide across its slick surface, he took notice of you. And then he jumped.

Looking back on it now, it was such a simple thing to do. But it left you in complete awe nonetheless.

Your eyes widened in pure disbelief as you watched him go from gliding with careful foot steps backwards to kicking one foot off the ground and forcefully raising the rest of his body into the air. For a moment you thought he was hovering in time, as if that one movement had stopped the flow of gravity just for him to levitate off the ice for a moment. And then in a slow motion-esqe manner you watched as he spun once in the air and then came back down landing perfectly on the same foot he started with.

A single axel, you recognized. One of the first things a figure skater learns when indulging in the sport. It looks so simple when you look at it from an outside eye but somehow it was enough to plunge you down into a world of wonder that you don’t even know you wanted to be in.

From that interaction, that's how you came to know wild and eccentric, Hwang Hyunjin. The new rising star and fan favorite within the figure skating world, and the owner of several gold medals that newbies don’t usually own. You knew that because he wouldn’t stop telling you once he got the chance. As clueless yet endearing his personality and perfectionist tendencies were, you two hit it off almost immediately. You don’t know whether it was because you like the fact that he was a figure skater, something you used to have a huge interest, or you liked him as a person but either way you two had gotten close enough for him to invite you to things outside of your little town.

One of those things, however, you did not expect to be attending one of the biggest figure skating competitions of his life.

Come with me, he said, it’ll be fun! I can show you how professional I get and how easy it is for me to win.

How it convinced you to join him on a cross-country trip is completely out of your mind. However it’s too late to go back on your words as now you were here at his competition standing on the sidelines with full moon like wide eyes looking back-and-forth between everyone who is currently in the room.

There were several other figure skaters here all warming up on the sidelines and getting ready for their performances to impress the judges. Every single one of them within the room were hoping to attend the Grand Prix of figure skating, and this competition was the last thing standing in their way to being able to compete. Despite this important detail though all of the competitors were looking around anxiously, the skin on the back of their neck standing up as they stayed on edge. There was this sense of stress within all of the skaters as the presumed to be new figure skating champion was in the building.

They were scared that no matter how well they went throughout their performance, they would be no match for the long-haired blonde you knew.

“Y/N!” A chirpy voice called out to you, like sunrays wrapped within their tone. You whirled your head around towards them, finally clicking back into the reality that you were here to support and not to gawk.

A boy not that much older than you came skipping up to you, his freckles stretching across his face like strained stars in a telescope’s eye. Lee Felix was a friend of Hyunjin, working and training under the same coach for their competitions. You had only recently met with him just a few days ago when you and Hyunjin had arrived in the city for his competition, but he already proved himself to be such a friendly and honest person that it felt like you had known him for years.

“Felix,” you grin, pushing yourself away from the railing of the ice rink to meet him halfway. Unlike many of the other figure skaters within the room, dressed in sparkly and eye-catching outfits for their performances, he was just as bundled up with warm clothing as you are. It seemed as though he was going to be watching the skaters instead of joining them on the ice for the day. “What are you doing here? Weren’t you supposed to be with your coach and Hyunjin?”

“Usually,” the boy shrugged, moving his hands within the pockets of his puffy jacket. “But I’m not the one competing today, am I? Why would I sit and listen to a lecture about doing my best and aiming for the top when it’s not even aimed at me? Plus it gets boring after awhile.”

You snort at the boy’s excuse, rolling your eyes and turning back towards the ice. “I don’t know, maybe it’s because moral support can take someone a long way?”

“Is it not enough moral support to be standing up and watching from the side lines instead of laying down in my nice, warm, cozy bed? I could be sitting right next to a heated fireplace right now but here I am standing in the cold with no blanket to wrap myself in.” Felix jeered, his eyes looking far off into a world you couldn’t see. But by the expressions on his face you could assume he was fantasizing about the warm bed he had mentioned.

“How can you be an ice skater if the only thing on your mind is a bed and warmth?” You teased.

“Hey! I can’t help the fact that being warm is the best feeling in the universe! Why do you think I like hugs so much? It’s basically just sharing body heat so you won’t be cold,” He argued, wrapping his arms around himself to mimic the gesture. “Let’s not forget the fact that some people also give out the best hugs I’ve ever felt as well.”

You had to conceal the obnoxious laugh that wanted to escape your mouth. Felix was such an endearing person, the way he acts and the way he talks were two completely different things from when he was on the ice. Or at least that’s what Hyunjin told you, but he was known for… overdramatizing things.

“Speak of the devil!” Felix exclaimed untangling his arms from around himself and pointing to the other end of the ice rink. “There’s the star of the day!”

The chitter chatter of the competitors and watchers suddenly began to lower, turning into a low mumble as everyone’s eyes were fixated on the ice skater who had just stepped on the ice to warm up with the feat of the skaters.

Figure skaters are like fairies, you remind yourself. They move across the ice as if they’re flying and they sparkle in the light with a certain ethereal and shimmer to them. You knew this, you’ve always known this about figure skaters. But there was a certain flare about Hyunjin that was simply unmatched by every other competitor in the room.

Maybe it didn’t help with the fact that Hyunjin was already conventionally attractive in your eyes, but seeing him skate across the ice in his costume for his performance was mesmerizing. The way the light bounced across the glittery blue fabric of his ruffled Victorian shirt, or the way the colors of white and blue hues would blend into a beautiful ombré when in combination with his pitch black pants and ice skates. Don’t even get started on how the way the azure blue ribbon tied up in his blond hair gave him just the right amount of purity to make him seem as though he were an angel in the flesh.

Mesmerizing, just mesmerizing.

“Hyunjin!” Felix called, waving his hands to catch the skater’s attention. The boy immediately turned the both of you, a soft smile appearing on his lips as he changed courses and began to glide towards the two of you. The bright lights of the ice rink made him shimmer like stars as he approached and the unorthodox beating of your heart was making it extremely hard to focus on one thing at a time right now. You had never seen him all dolled up and captivating while he was skating before. The best you had ever seen from him was a black skinny jeans and an overpriced on-brand hoodie.

“Felix,” He greeted, his soft smile still unchanging as he dressed his fellow skater. Hyunjin leaned up against the railing for support as his eyes then drifted towards you, adoration swirling within his irises. “Y/N. How do I look? Usually I’m not dressed too flashy but the coach thought this would be a nice change for this particular song.”

“You look nice,” you manage to choke out, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible with the burning hot reds of your ears and your clear flustered face. The figure skater pouted in response to your lackluster compliment, probably expecting a much grander praise from you seeing as this was your first time seeing him dressed in such a way. “What? I told the truth, you look nice.”

“Nothing else? Just nice?” He urged, trying to push another, higher quality compliment out of you. “What about… gorgeous? Ethereal? Bewitching? Exquisite—“

“Nice,” you repeat, absentmindedly running your hands through each strand of blond hair you could reach and gazing at the blue ribbon in his hair. “You look nice.”

“Oh,” Hyunjin nodded, melting into you as you rhythmically brushed your hands through his hair. “Alright, I’ll take that.”

“I did not come here to see you be gross with each other,” Felix chimed in, reminding the two of them that they weren’t alone at the lake in your little town, but in an ice rink filled with people whose eyes were always watching Hyunjin’s every move. The figure skater pushed himself off of the railing, putting a small distance between the two of you as a sheepish laugh escaped his mouth.

You attempted to laugh it off as well, punching Felix in the shoulder with a little too much strength to try and hide the embarrassment. How could you have forgotten that was literally right next to you? What if you slipped up and said something without realizing he was there? What if you acted without realizing everyone’s eyes were constantly on Hyunjin, and because he approached you, you as well?

Stupid Y/N. You’re so stupid, stupid, stupid—

“That’s my que,” Hyunjin gasped as a man spoke over the speakers, his words blasting into everyone’s ears to remind them that the competition would soon begin. You weren’t really paying attention to what was being said, though. Your eyes were too focused on the way the fabric of Hyunjin’s ombré blue and white shirt fit his physique perfectly and the way his hair was fell into perfect shape on his shoulders. “Wish me luck!”

“Get that first place bro,” Felix encouraged him, giving him a hard and strong high five. “Take us to the Grand Prix, I really wanna go to Tokyo this year.”

“That depends,” the figure skater said, turning towards with a shining grin plastered onto his face. “Y/N, do you wanna go to Tokyo?”

“You’re gonna put your whole rookie career on Y/N?” Felix gasped, his eyes widened in disbelief as he looked between the two of you. You don’t blame him for being so caught off guard by Hyunjin’s question, you were just as confused as Felix was.

Your bewildered expression and utter silence wasn’t being taken for an answer as Hyunjin intently looked at you, patiently waiting for you to respond despite the speakers overhead telling all skaters to clear off the ice. After taking a moment to compose yourself, you finally open your mouth to speak. “Hyunjin, you’ve been working towards the Grand Prix final for how long now? You shouldn’t be placing your entire career on—“

“Answer the question,” he interrupted. “Do you want to go to Tokyo with me?”

“Yes,” You finally answer him. “I would like to go to Tokyo with you.”

It was like your answer gave Hyunjin a sudden boost of motivation, his smile going from ear to ear and his eyes turning into little crescent moons as he began to shift to and fro on the ice. “Alright then,” He nodded, kicking himself backwards to go and join the rest of the skaters who were simply waiting for the boy to step off the ice. As he skated backwards, hands behind his back and his ice skates kicking up little chunks of ice, he kept eye contact with you and called out. “I’ll make sure I’ll take you to Tokyo, Y/N! And I’ll win the gold medal just for you!”

“Of course, you will!” You tell after him as he turned around. “You’re obligated to win me the gold medal because you brought me all the way here without telling me! Your gold medal is my gold medal!”

[timextoxhajima]

death to 2020

cause fuck 2020 lmao

disclaimer: im usually a really brutally honest person with alot of vulgarities because that’s how strongly i feel about stuff im willing to talk about, so... brace yourself for alot of vulgarities and occasionally a word you wouldn’t understand cause it’s a singaporean vulgarity 

now where the FUCK do i start?

i started 2020 really happy, though i was still reeling from the shit relationship i was in for most of 2019. he was a cunt and we broke up in september 2019. i got attached again in feb 2020 to a guy i was seeing from late 2019. 

ANYWAY

my tumblr journey began in july (i don’t fkin remember what date it was anymore because it doesn’t matter) and long story short, tumblr has become my escape from reality. as most of you know i’ve been writing since 2014, just never touched this platform until 2016 because i was busy reading smuts WUPS but decided i wanted a more interactive platform with my readers so i ended up here. 

ANYWAY X2

below is the list of people i wna thank for making my tumblr journey so much more worthwhile, though we might not be close. i also don’t take note of my moots so im so fucking sorry if i missed you out, seriously just drop me an angry ask and ill bow down at your feet.

ANYWAY X3 LET’S BEGIN

to qiu: @stealerz

for being the little sister but like, my sunbae? LMAO uk how when a younger idol debuts but they meet an older idol that debuts later lmao yeah that’s us. i always find it honorable that you come to me for advice, and while i am known among my friends for giving great advice, i never fucking agreed because more often than not, i don’t follow my OWN advice. so qiu acts like a reminder that hey, maybe i shd stfu and listen to myself. but i really wna thank qiu for keeping me in the circle because im not one to initiate conversations (EVER) and she’s always the one talking to me about sch stuff which actually grounds me? makes me believe that school and my virtual reality can still coincide. thank you for being such an amazing friend, for being a person i actually feel close to because...? proximity? HAHAH but anyways, happy death to 2020, love. 

to yu: @lsangyeons

for trusting me so much with whatever you tell me about your life. i’m someone who doesn’t offer trust easily, and even if it does seem like i do, there are alot more things i tend to keep from people about my private life, so i know exactly how it feels to talk to someone you only know online about the things that bug us. your drawings are so fucking amazing and adorable, it’s just endearing to see that hardwork come out in something else besides writing (because that’s all ive been fkin doing lolz). i hope 2021 treats you alot better, because you deserve it. HAPPY DEATH TO 2020. 

to bella: @fullsunsays

for also trusting me with your emotional breakdowns (i hope you are alright with me saying this here because you talk about it on your acc every now and then but if you’re uncomfortable just give me a sound out and i’ll get rid of it). i just get so fking flattered because it just feels like you feel safe around me? and that? you treat me like a safe space? ion know it’s just all pretty new to me, about being in this online community. thank you for screaming with me/at me about different things, thank you for being so endearing with my shit, and i hope nothing but a better year for you. happy death to 2020, my love. 

to violet: @yunhoiseyecandy

for putting up with my nonsense every now and then and being so accepting to my feral side. i dont know if its because i know you’re an ateez stan and yknow ateez stans are usually more feral than tbz stans (idk i rlly dont) and like, i just find myself screaming to you every now and then and you’d do the same and it gives me ‘a pair of dumb feral bimbo’ vibes so, i dont know what i’d do without you, honestly. sometimes you’re the reminder that i have ateez stuff in my drafts or sitting in my laptop waiting to be published and youre a reminder that half my masterlist is also ateez content LOL. we don’t rlly talk about our private lives much but i definitely appreciate you way more than you think. happy death to 2020, vio. 

to gina: @sunlightwoo

for closing the gap so quickly! i earnestly dont remember how we got to be moots and all i remember is you screaming to me about smth and i screamed back and we just clicked from there, ion know LMAO. i love it that you’re so endearing and so patient with my shit and the stuff you write! omg. not many things make my heart flutter and BEST BELIEVE i DIED when i read your eric fic for the 12 days of christmas collab. we don’t rlly know much about our private lives and that’s alright, but i just want you to know that you deserve everything. happy death to 2020, gina!

to daisy: @sangyeon-lee

for confusing the fuck outta me when you switched from a fluffy yunho (??) mydaintydaisy to sangyeon as ur dp and sangyeon lee as ur user i was like ???? who the fuc-- OH. BUT YOU ARE SO FUCKING SWEET like i swear on GOD you are that one friend in the grp of girls that bakes cookies and give hugs and offer sweets and... give more hugs i really can’t uwu. (but now that your dp has changed i might have second thoughts hm). anyhow, we haven’t really interacted much besides in the 12 days of christmas collab gc but i just want you to know that i appreciate you in my notifs SO MUCH and i just hope we have a chance to get closer. happy death to 2020, daisy. 

to han @fleurseoul, april @tbzlvr and ri @sunwoowuvbot

for being such amazing readers, for constantly giving me encouragement, for always being my first notes or reblogs and i NEVER miss out on reading your tags like EVER because they are what keeps me going and keeps me motivated to keep writing. like, i really have no words to describe the gratitude i have. 

ANYWAY X4

below are the moots in my awareness (because im a fucking idiot ngl) that i appreciate and hope we can get to know each other better uwu

@elcie-chxn @experimentalwrites @ddadadada @chaoticdeobi @atbzkingdom @micaronn (i feel like i have a fuckload more but my goldfish brain cannot handle it lmao)

please send me an angry ask if i’ve missed you out >:(

ANYWAY x5

here’s to a better 2021, here’s to a year that’s not so much of a shitshow. here’s to the death of 2020. PEACE OUT. 

[muwur]

idk if this counts as an emergency or comfort request but ive been havin a REAL bad body image week nsnnnsnnnsnn could i maybe request headcanons for either oikawa or kuroo (u can pick if u wanna) with an s/o who is rlly self conscious about being chubby/has a really hard time with food and mayb feels like worthless because theyre not the ideal body type? idk sorry if thats dumb aaaah thank u sm if u choose to do this

self-love

♡ scenarios ♡ for oikawa and kuroo

❧ gn reader

✎ 3.7k words

a/n: hey hun, im sorry to hear you’ve been having a rough time lately. this kind of request actually rlly hits close to home, and if u ever need anything, ur mor than welcome to reach out to me :) i can also help look for resources for help, anything really. this goes for all y’all! i dont want none y’all to feel alone with anything ur going thru cuz we’re in this together! and no need to thank me, the pleasure is mine luv 🥰💕 nothing about this is dumb, ur feelings are valid. i hope this will bring you n many others some comfort. also,, FUCK BODY STANDARDS MAKIN US BELIEVE THERE’S AN IDEAL TYPE BC THERE IS NONE N Y’ALL R BEAUTIFUL N IF U DUN THINK SO I WILL COME OVER DER,,, ok im done 🥰🥰 (more notes at the bottom of this, i talk a lot n think its important, didnt wanna add it up here bc it was too long lolol) tw: mentions of bad body and implies disordered eating behaviors

 oikawa

♡ Oikawa was pretty keen, so when he observed a gradual shift in your behavior, he definitely took notice

♡ One day when you showed up to lunchtime empty-handed and sat with your two friends, casually chatting, Oikawa and Iwaizumi gave you a questioning look

♡ “Where’s your lunch, y/n?” Oikawa asked

♡ “Oh, I, uh, ate it already, actually.”

♡ Iwaizumi raised an eyebrow and offered you some of his, but you declined, thanking him and stating you were already full

♡ Later that day in class, however, Oikawa couldn’t help but notice the absence of your boxed lunch container in your unzipped backpack

♡ The next day, you came empty-handed again, blaming it on your forgetfulness during your rush to get to school

♡ However, it became a normal occurrence over time, and while you seemed fine, uneasiness began to prick inside Oikawa’s stomach

♡ Those smiles you wore appeared fragile, and the laughter that rumbled from your throat felt restrained

♡ You seemed more tired and unfocused than usual

♡ Preoccupied, withdrawn, and distant

♡ He could sense something was bothering you, no matter how much you may (or may not) have tried to hide it

♡ On his way to school one morning, he made sure to stop by a convenience store to pick one of your favorite snacks, thinking it was a simple gesture to brighten up the somber aura he’s been detecting from you

♡ “I have a surprise for you, y/n~” Oikawa announced with excitement, rummaging through his bag to pull out the snack and show it to you. “Look, it’s your favorite!”

♡ You could only offer him an uneasy smile, “Oh, you shouldn’t have...” You really shouldn’t have...

♡ When he noticed the tension in your body and expression, a frown appeared on his lips

♡ “Y/n? Is something wrong?” He reached out to place a comforting hand on your shoulder but you swiftly flinched away

♡ ”I’m fine..!”

♡ Surprised at your sudden movement and outburst, you both felt a split second of apprehension crackle in the air before you started to gather your items in a rush

♡ Sighing, you repeated, “I’m fine.”

♡ He wasn’t sure whether you were speaking to him or yourself

♡ “Thanks for the snack, but I’ll pass. Have it for me. You need it more, anyways; you have volleyball practice. I’ll see you tomorrow, Oikawa,” you offered him a solemn smile and left before he could even reply

♡ Some time had passed before he could finally get you to open up to him

♡ And when you did, it crushed his heart to see how much your insecurities broke you

♡ It hurt to hear how low you thought about yourself; how you couldn’t see the beauty in your being; how you deemed food, your body, and yourself as your worst enemies

♡ Thus bringing you to the conclusion that maybe you’d be happy and like yourself if you could just give up that midday snack or your school lunch

♡ Even raincheck a cafe date you were supposed to have together

♡ Maybe also skip dinner, sometimes breakfast the next morning as well

♡ You could manage on just water

♡ Little sacrifices to shed some weight, feel better, and get closer to your ideal body goals

♡ You admitted, however, to questioning whether any of it was worth it

♡ The constant states of hunger, pain, and defeat you lived in

♡ Only to feel as though you were getting nowhere

♡ Oikawa was well aware of today’s beauty standards. I mean, he himself was often praised for his natural charm and beauty

♡ And you felt you could never reach that ideal

♡ “Oikawa, you’re too good for me.”

♡ His eyebrows knitted in concern as he lifted his right hand to caress your cheek softly. “And why do you say that?”

♡ Tears threatened to prick at your eyes. All you could was stare at the ground in silent shame

♡ When you still said nothing, he leaned in closer, his brown gaze softly pleading

♡ “Y/n, look at me.”

♡ When your eyes flickered up to meet his own, Oikawa asked, “You know I love you, right?”

♡ His question was met with a meek, “Yes.”

♡ From your clouded glaze, he could tell that you had a hard time believing in your own response

♡  “Do you know why?”

♡ But before you could respond, he was already answering his own question

♡ “Well...” he began, glancing up in thought and wearing a small smile

♡ “Something about you makes me want to be by your side. I love to see your smiles and hear your laughter, but I always want to be there to hold you when you’re crying and in pain.”

♡ “You’re supportive. You understand what I need, and I don’t always have to explain myself to you. You take your time with me and make me feel like I can be myself. Not many people have stuck around to actually get to know me. Because of that, you’ve never failed to make my day a little better with just your presence.”

♡ “You’re strong and caring. I can rely on you to have my back, and I hope I provide that same comfort to you as well.”

♡ “I love being able to lazy around with you or go on adventures and discover something new. It’s comfortable and exciting at the same time.”

♡ “Your hands feel like they were made to hold mine.”

♡ He reached down to squeeze your hand gently

♡ “Kissing you makes me forget about everything else on my mind. I can just live in the present with you.”

♡ He moved close and gave you a peck above your eyebrow

♡ “You make me want to work hard and be a better person. You help motivate me to try my best, and you never give up on me. Why would I ever give up on you?”

♡  “I learn something new with you everyday. Like right now, I realize that I’ve never met someone who could so easily make my heart race as they could make my heart break.”

♡ “When I look at you, all I can think about is how beautiful you are and how lucky I am to have you in my life as a partner and one of my best friends. Nobody else could fill the gaps within me the same way you do.”

♡ Leaning over to brush his lips against your forehead, he muttered, “I’m going to love every part of you, inside and out. You’re already my ideal. I couldn’t ask for anything more. I could go on about every detail on why I feel so strongly for you, but I’m here to show you everything there is to appreciate about yourself because you’re worth every ounce of care and effort. And if you can’t see it in yourself right now, I’ll love you more than enough for the both of us until you learn to love yourself. I’m here to help.”

♡ And after crying out your tears into his shoulder as he held you close and rubbed your back, you both went to his house to relax and have some dinner

♡ He was patient with you, taking into account how having a meal may have made you feel anxious

♡ It was something small and simple that you two agreed to prepare and share, after some tender coaxing from Oikawa

♡ He later made a list in his journal about tips to keep in mind:

♡ ‘Check up on y/n often to see how they’re feeling’

♡ ‘Encourage them to eat meals/snacks. Don’t be too pushy, but be patient. Try to have eat with them when you can!’

♡ ‘Remind them they don’t have to earn the right to eat, and that their body doesn’t define their worth‘

♡ ‘Look into some mindfulness techniques!’

♡ ‘Don’t overvalue physical appearance. Also focus on all the other redeeming qualities y/n has! But of course I’m always gonna tell them they look cutee--’

♡ True to his word, he remained understanding

♡ He’s there to listen to you, or to sit with you in comforting silence

♡ During lunch he would share his food with you, reassuring you that it wasn’t something you had to avoid

♡ Some days he succeeds in encouraging you to share a milk bun or your favorite snack with him

♡ And on days you really didn’t feel like it, he never forces anything onto you and instead made sure you at least hydrated

♡ Oikawa spends some time doing research and gathering tips on how to help you

♡ Always reminds you of your worth and how you bring out the best in him

♡ He’ll never hold it against you if you ever become hostile, irritated, or in denial. He knows you’re hurting and doesn’t take it personally

♡ Sends you cute memes with all those emoji hearts

♡ Also some food puns (Oikawa: “I’m soy into you. Please brie mine. We are mint to be. I ap-peach-iate you. You got a pizza my heart. Olive you--” ; You: *puts a hand over his mouth* ; Oikawa: 🥺 ; You: “...olive you, too”)

♡ Always ready to give up what he’s doing to make sure you’re okay

♡ Will stay up with you late at night to talk on the phone

♡ Reminds you you’re beautiful at least 8 times a day

♡ If y’all ever go shopping and you try things on in the fitting room,, Oikawa would be your #1 hype man

♡ One time you tried something on, and you were almost too ashamed to step out and show him

♡ But when you did, you were met with his surprise and excitement

♡ “dfghjklkuyfuh” was all you could process from his incoherent speech before he insisted on treating you by purchasing it for you (Oikawa: “Can you wear this for me, like, everyday?” ; You: *weird look* “Why are you like this??” you love it tho--)

♡ Gushes internally over how cute you are during your movie + cuddle sessions, mostly pays attention to you rather than the movie

♡ Mid-movie be like:

♡ Oikawa: “So, uh, what’s happening again?

♡ You: -.- “You might as well google the whole synopsis instead of watching it”

♡ Oikawa: “...it’s not my fault you’re distracting, babe”

♡ Always politely excuses himself from his fangirls to get to you. Also reassures you he much prefers to be with you than anyone else and that you’re the best catch ;)) (You: “Oikawa, no” ; Oikawa: “y/n, yes”)

♡ Suggested doing some meditation together once

♡ You listened to a recording and you sat side by side on a mat, but Oikawa thought the person’s voice sounded funny so he had a hard time focusing

♡ But it ended with y’all laughing and making jokes as he lay his lead on your lap and you played with his hair

♡ Y’all get better at it tho

♡ Cooking dates! To try to show you that food isn’t an enemy and can bring people together :)

♡ Puts music on so y’all can jam together (Oikawa: “Oh my gosh, y/n, this is my favorite song, you’re not even rEADY to see me perform-- ; You: “Oikawa, t-the food! It’s burning!!”)

♡ Cooking dates also show that you should never leave the stove unattended

♡ Every once in a while he suggests seeking professional help. He wishes he could take away your pain and help you all his own, but he knows this is more complicated and required outside help, too

♡ Has help resources READY

♡ As well as small snacks like granola bars for you if you ever feel faint

♡ He doesn’t hesitate to confront you when he feels it’s necessary and he’s worried about your habits

♡ He handles things well, though, and often convinces you to take care of yourself more, even though he’s there to look after you

♡ Has made it his mission to help you win against your battle with insecurities

♡ Overall, he’s very caring and empathetic, hoping one day you’ll see yourself the way he sees you 💖 : strong, amazing, breathtaking, & perfectly imperfect

kuroo

♡ Occasionally, you would think about the day you broke down in front of him

♡ Your body racked with repressed whimpers as you tried to wipe the tears from your eyes and describe the recent state of your mind through choked sobs

♡ Lately, your thoughts were being especially relentless in making you feel miserable

♡ Oftentimes you’d be able to shove the negative thoughts to the back of your mind and carry on your day as usual, expertly acting as though everything in your life was going smoothly

♡ However, you found yourself fighting a losing battle against your own conscious, heavily preoccupied with thoughts of your own worthlessness

♡ And so you tried to cope

♡ But you were painfully aware of everything you felt was wrong with you

♡ You felt uncomfortable in your skin

♡ Every time you passed by your own reflection, you couldn’t help but mentally recoil at the image looking back at you

♡ Your clothes didn’t fit right

♡ Even when you opted for baggy clothes, you felt like you were taking up all the space in them

♡ Maybe it was the weight gain. You could see and feel it in your face, your arms, your stomach, your legs... everywhere

♡ You just wanted to hide away your shame

♡ Perhaps it was the dessert you allowed yourself to eat the other day. Foolish of you to think then that you wouldn’t regret it as much as you did afterwards

♡ As a consequence of those foolish actions, you made mental notes about anything and everything you ate. What it was, how much of it you had, etc

♡ Trying to restrict so that maybe you would lose some weight and come to like how you look

♡ Your obsessive thoughts of food and weight overtook your mind like a dark cloud

♡ Your favorite foods, which before would never fail to brighten your mood, taunted you with shame and guilt

♡ Exercise? Sometimes it was an activity you genuinely enjoyed. Other times, a chore that made you feel shitty or numb and reinforced your unhealthy desire to lose

♡ And you sometimes found yourself crying over your last meal, one you know you didn’t need. One you didn’t deserve

♡ And each time you released the reins on your self-control, you felt pathetic going against the vow you made to yourself  

♡ At this rate, you’d never be beautiful or be happy with yourself

-You’d remain unworthy, fat, disgusting--

-But before you could continue, your story was cut off by the impact of Kuroo’s embrace

-Your surprise silenced your sobs, and you could only stare wide-eyed at the space in front of you as you felt his arms squeeze tightly around your frame

-You both sat there for a few moments on your knees, with your back lightly leaning against a wall

- “I’m sorry for the pain you’re experiencing,” he begins softly. “Thank you for sharing with me. It must’ve taken a lot for you to do that.”

-He was right. It was your first time reaching out to another person about this. It was the last thing you thought you would’ve done today

- “I want to let you know that you shouldn’t be ashamed for feeling this way. Reaching out is important and brings you the help you need to get better. I know you might not want help right now or think that these thoughts and behaviors are a problem. However, telling me about all this shows that some part of you is recognizing there’s something wrong and you can’t always handle it on your own.”

-There were many reasons you kept this to yourself. You didn’t want to bother anyone else. Your problems seemed so trivial.  You worried saying them aloud would confirm your beliefs. You were scared people would see you differently. You--

-The intrusive thoughts never failed to make you feel ashamed

-However, it was oddly comforting to release the pent up emotions. To know you didn’t have to bottle up this burden anymore, and that you weren’t alone

-You were about to murmur in response when,

- “Also, you’re an idiot, y/n.”

- “Wow, thanks, as if I don’t already think that about myself,” you bit back in response

-You were about to shove him away just when he released his grip around your body and placed his hands on your shoulders

-His eyes shone with determination and a faint, inviting smile spread on his lips

- “You are the one of the single most important things in my life. I just mean you’re an idiot in the sense that you’re overevaluating one aspect to define your whole self. You’ve forgotten about all your other redeeming qualities that contribute to who you are.”

♡ “Your size, weight, shape; none of that matters. What matters is your health and happiness. Neglecting yourself in order to reach an ‘ideal’ that you’ve concluded is the answer to your self-worth is only bringing you farther away from what you truly want.”

♡ “I don’t mean to downplay any of your emotions or how significant this is to you. Your first step was to put your trust into someone else about this. That’s done. Now, I’m here to help you undergo self-evaluation and serve as encouragement on your journey to self-love and acceptance.”

♡ “I also want to remind you progress is not linear. There will be times when things are harder, and that’s okay; it’s part of the process. If you’re open to getting better in the future, I’m sure as hell going to be there every step of the way.”

♡ And with a soft peck to the forehead and another hug, he nuzzled into your neck and muttered, “I love you. And I want you to love yourself. So, please, allow me to help you through this and I guarantee that by the end of it all, it’ll have been so worth it.”

♡ Unsure what to say, you gripped his jacket tighter, buried your head in his shoulder, and muttered, “Thank you.”

♡ While the negative feelings about yourself remained afterward, you were relieved that your boyfriend was supportive and calm

♡ He treated you the same as always, teasing you over dumb things while making you feel like you stood among the highest peaks on Earth

♡ The day after, he had shown up to your house, weary-eyed and carrying his backpack

♡ “Kuroo? Why are you here? Also, why do you look so tired??”

♡ He stepped into your house with a yawn. He stretched his arms, then reached for his bag and whipped out his laptop

♡ “I stayed up a bit last night to do some research, babe! I also learned a lot about nutrition and molecular gastronomy, so I could help you come up with a meal plan that you’re okay with!”

♡ You were touched he was educating himself on how to help you

♡ But you drew the line at the science jokes-- (Kuroo: “You know you love them.” ; You: “‘Na’ I don’t.” ; Kuroo: :ooo “Did you just-- Marry me.”) (Na = sodium lol)

♡ His nutritional research helped you to learn the contents of food beyond calories; mans explains the vitamins, nutrients, amino acids, etc in them that you need and their benefits

♡ “Trout, avocados, and almonds have vitamin E, which is good for your skin! Oh, and don’t get me started on bananas. Yes, they have carbs (which your body needs anyway as a source of energy!), but POTASSIUM?? Shit’s gonna regulate your fluid balance, maintain heart health, stimulate normal muscle function, AND help your brain to communicate with the rest of your body!”

♡ ALSO cooking dates; just as chaotic (“Aw mannn, the egg exploded all over the microwave!” dont ask y it was being microwaved)

♡ Over time, he’s taken mental notes about your thoughts, feelings, triggers, etc

♡ He’s quick to pick up on your mood and will always ask you how you’re doing

♡ Tries to do something special for you on days you’re especially not feeling well, like taking you on a spontaneous date! (You: “Do you know how to ice skate?” ; Kuroo: “Uhh,,, after today, I will hopefully”)

♡ But will also opt for staying in with you and cuddling when you don’t want to go out (Kuroo: “I heard this movie is soooo bad! ...wanna watch it?”)

♡ Invited you to the beach with his team during the first week of summer

♡ You were unsure about this, since that meant going out in public, potentially with minimal clothing

♡ You initially sat on a beach towel under an umbrella, wearing the security of a T-shirt. He’d been aware of how you felt ever since he asked you to come, so he would sit with you and link an arm around your shoulder

♡ “I’m lucky I get to spend this day with you,” he’d say. “You look gorgeous. You always do. Now, I wanna see you smile and have fun. Let’s go take a dip, yeah?” He offered his hand, which you shyly took, and pulled you up

♡ Then immediately picked you up and started running to the water to get you soaking wet, and you were forced to ditch the heavy, waterlogged shirt

♡ However, you silently thanked him for his sweet words, making you feel secure enough to just forget your worries and enjoy the warm sun and cool water

♡ He also tries his best to lessen your anxieties over food and often shares/eats meals with you

♡ Reminds you everyday how much you’re worth to him and that there’s nothing about you that needs to change

♡ This sweet, protective, n smart boi will treat you how you deserve. It’s a guarantee he’ll be there through thick and thin, and he’s excited for the day you realize you’re just as amazing as he knows you are 💕

a/n: oop this was rlly long lol mb, i just may or may not personally know a bit about this so i went oFF

also neded to some som silly n fluff bc we all need dat

also, these r like kinda hc’s ?? but also a deconstructed oneshot/scenario?? bc they provide some rly brief bg story? one from more  of the character perspective while the other more on y/n before we get  to the hc’s about how he treats y/n. how everyone struggles w body image is different n i wanted to portray a bit of what it felt like and how it could manifest in ppl’s behaviors/thoughts. however, this is not to say that everyone feels exactly like this. what i wrote only represents a fraction of it all.

by providing some sort of bg i hope im not making u feel like this isnt u  or that u cant relate, pls lmk if i need to change anything to make it  right for u <3 ok now im actually done sry long author’s note  rfguhofe this is just rlly important to me y’all  , stay safe n take care, much luv for u <3

[nextstopparis]

💜🌱💙 get-to-know-your-mutuals tag 💜🌱💙

Rules: When you get this, it means someone wants to know more about you, so list 5 things about yourself you want your followers to know! They can be as simple as your age or as complex as your deepest fear, as long as it’s something you’re comfortable with sharing. When you’re done and if you want to, send this to 10 people you want to get to know better!

thank u for tagging me @queerofthedagger 🥺❤️

be prepared folks, i am, what one might call, an ~✨oversharer✨~

1) i love writing in diaries. i love love love it. i think i have around seven ongoing diary-like things that im writing in whenever. they all have a different vibe in terms of what aspect of my life i write in them. (i also sometimes write essays for myself, but only because i need a way to organize my thoughts in full. it rlly helps.)

2) i taught myself how to raise my left eyebrow. idk if thats thrilling or out of the ordinary at all, but when i was younger i really wanted to be able to raise one eyebrow at a time, so i decided on my left eyebrow and managed it. unfortunately, later on i learned that i could just naturally do my right eyebrow, but it was too late by then😔 its not easy being the dumbest bitch around but someones gotta do it, i guess. and! at least now i can raise both eyebrows individually, so who’s really the clown?

3) for some reason, for one/two days every year i suddenly get this urge to?? watch as many documentaries about ocean creatures as possible??? its so fucking weird because its been happening for the past? 7 years? where i just wake up and crave learning about sharks/octopuses/whatever. and then the next day its gone as if it never happened. this occurs EVERY YEAR its so off-putting considering nothing i ever do coincides with it at all????

4) i was not made for reading. i can read fanfic most of the time - but almost nothing else. this is kind of a new thing, and its despicable, i know, but i can not bring myself to sit still or focus for long enough. i literally read 2 sentences and have to check 4 social media sites, watch 18 videos, drink 6 cups of tea and then do that again after the next 2 lines. my friends clown me when i say watching tv is easier than reading, but what can you do ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

5) ive had white hair (strands, obvs sksnsk) since elementary and a piece of my soul dies every time one comes into view.

(im not paying mind to the mutual part sksks just gonna tag ppl): @stevethesteveharrington @once-and-future-dawn @once-and-future-gay @merthurlooks @witchmd13 if u want to do it and anyone else that sees this n wants to:) srry if uve been tagged already!

[katsvra]

Tagged by @ryuzakki ​ thank you so much anthea <33

tagging: @kuruisu, @lovekuramas, @ocarinnas @kishitan-iis @usagiyamah @haru-kaas

rules: answer these 85 statements about yourself, then tag 15 people

LAST

1. drink - green tea !

2. 📱 call -  my mom 

3. text - a friend texting to ask about concert merch 

4. song you listened to - idk the name of the song but its the yakuza 0 soundtrack

5. time you 😢 - yesterday tbh 

HAVE YOU EVER

6. dated someone twice - never even dated anyone once lmao 

7. 😘 someone and regretted it - never kissed anyone either

8. been cheated on - nope

9. lost someone special - yes, when i was quite young

10. been depressed - yeah 

11. gotten drunk and thrown up - never thrown up after drinking 

FAVORITE COLORS

12. (pastel) pink !! 

13. purple

14. blue

15. yellow ! 

in the last year have you

16. made new friends - yes  !! 

17. fallen out of 💛 - nope nope

18. 😂 until you 😢 - yes i have !! ive got some funny friends :’) 

19. found out someone was talking about you - nope but im sure people are 

20. met someone who changed you - um i didnt meet anyone knew but i got closer to some people who changed me!

21. found out who your friends are - not really 

22. 😘 someone on your facebook friends list - nope nope 

GENERAL

23. how many friends from your fb friends list do you know irl - all of them except tania and joanne

24. do you have any pets - i have a hamster named beanu ! 

25. do you want to change your middle name - not really, its my chinese name and i quite like it c: 

26. what did you do for your last 🎂 - i thought we were throwing a surprise party for my friend but when i showed up, it turns out they were all throwing a surprise party for me and it was super sweet :’) we ended up going for korean bbq  and karaoke ! 

27. what time did you wake up today - 12pm /sweats

28. what were you doing last night at midnight - working on my midterm notes 

29. what is something you can’t wait for - MARIANAS TRENCH CONCERT !! this wednesday!!!! i havent shut up about it for weeks !!!

30. what are you listening to right now - still the yakuza 0 soundtrack ! 

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom - i knew someone named tommy which i think is close enough

32. something that gets on your nerves - when people :)) are late :))) and they dont notify you that they will be late :)))) so you just sit there for an hour, not sure if they are actually going to show up :))))))) 

33. most visited website - twitter & youtube & probably my school website 

34. hair color - auburn ish with black roots now lol 

35. long hair or short hair - i have rlly long hir and i like it on me ! altho i think short hair is adorable in general

36. do you have a crush on someone - nope

37. what do you like about yourself - i like that i try to view things optimistically, that im decently good at art, that im a big dreamer 

38. want any piercings - i used to until i found out im allergic to whatever they make earrings etc out of

39. blood type - tbh they told me and i forgot

40. nicknames - carz, carmine, weeb, dumbass, sunshine (which is still???? the cutest??)

41. relationship status - nonexistent

42. zodiac - virgo

43. pronouns - she/her

44. favorite 📺 show - hmm i havent watched tv in a while but the first that come to mind are b99 and doctor who. also rosy business!!! and scarlet heart (the original chinese one) was rlly good!

45. tattoos - love it on others, not so much myself

46. right handed or left - right!

47. ever had surgery - i mean,,, not that i can remember? 

48. piercings - I mean pierced ears but they are closing so ?? 

49. sports - i love skiing, skating and rollerblading !!! basically i dont like team sport, i like sports where i can just enjoy being outside c: 

50. vacation - we are planning a trip to BANFF!!! and im so excited!!! BANFF is such a gorgeous park and its just one of my dreams to go hiking or canoeing there omg ;; ^ ;; 

51. trainers - ??? are these running shoes??? i wear them in the summer bc i walk a lot, not so much winter bc canada is freaking cold

MORE GENERAL

52. eating - just gum

53. drinking - green tea, its all i ever drink

54. i’m about to watch - nothing since i need to study (but realistically, im going to watch yu yu hakusho)

55. waiting for - the concert ! and also for my acceptance (or rejection) letters to come in

56. want - a degree that can actually get me a job lol

57. get married - let me actually get into a relationship first before i think about this lol

58. career - dream career? field ecologist or working in a sanctuary or really anything environmental. realistically? teacher or nurse

WHICH IS BETTER

59. kisses or hugs - hugs def

60. 👄 or eyes - eyes

61. shorter or taller - taller

62. older or younger - older, im already immature enough for the both of us

63. nice arms or stomach - ?? neither tbh

64. hookup or relationship - relationship

65. troublemaker or hesitant - a bit of both !

HAVE YOU EVER

66. 😘 a stranger - nope, im literally the most boring person

67. drank hard liquor - yupp, actually more often than i should

68. lost glasses - yeah ^^;;

69. turned someone down - i think? in like elementary? 

70. sex on first date - nope

71. broken someone’s ❤️- maybe?? but like in elementary??? so does that even count lol

72. had your 💔 - not really but ive felt super betrayed by friends

73. been arrested - not yet 

74. 😢 when someone died - ,,,, yeah 

75. fallen for a friend - yes but she straight af so 

DO YOU BELIEVE IN

76. yourself - on good days ! 

77. miracles - not really

78. 💛 at first sight - with fictional characters maybe. irl? nah

79. 🎅 - lmao santa vixx maybe

80. 😘 on a first date - ?? idk let me go on a date first and ill get back to you eventually

81. angels - only friends sweet enough to be angels

other

82. best friend’s name - they all have unique names so let me use their nicknames: uma, sai, rita & veanu, what would i do without them :’( 

83. eye color - brown 

84. favorite movie - Lord of the Rings & Howl’s Moving Castle !!!! and a bunch of really old movies that im not gonna bother listing

85. favorite actor - i mean i really liked andy lau for a long time. and also wayne lai & sheren tang because i just ADORE rosy business. and ryan reynolds. always ryan reynolds. 

[lovedeluxe92]

okay so i started working at jimmy johns in early febuary of this year. i needed a job rlly bad and money desperately, just something to keep me afloat and to afford food. what i experienced...i was not at all prepared for lmao. i was sexually harassed, verbally harassed, had my hours fucked with, had management and even the owners of the company who could give a fuck less about their employees, had to deal with my fellow coworkers AND managers being on k2 and other drugs, and the final fucking straw which was getting my tip money stolen from me OUT OF THE SAFE BY A MANAGER. i started working as a delivery driver. which was INCREDIBLY stress inducing at first bc i worked at the one right downtown. i had to deal with

i started working as a delivery driver. which was INCREDIBLY stress inducing at first bc i worked at the one right downtown. i had to deal with

traffic, pedestrians NOT LOOKING WHERE THE FUCK THEY WERE GOING DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MANY PPL I ALMOST KILLED CAUSE /THEY/ DID NOT LOOK, we have ‘parking police’ and i legit got about 15-20 tickets during my time there bc that asshole was out for blood and anytime he saw my car, even if i wasnt parked illegally (oh did i mention we had like 3 parking spots all on the street and all with a 2 hour limit (: ) or hadnt been parked in a spot for the full 2 hours. so there was that. 

see when i first started everything was fine. we had good employees who worked hard and did what they had to do. they were all stoners, but whatever i could care less about that. SO. our assistant manager, he was a mess. racist, homophobic, rude, loud. the worst. we would do dabs out in his car (yeah i know but i worked at a fucking jimmy johns) and he would just say the most questionable shit. i remember this one time he saw my phone background was a pic of me and my bf and was like ‘oh you like black guys? what’s your sex like? i bet it’s really good’ and im not gonna go into too much detail here, bc it upset me and its racist,  but he kept going and said some REALLY creepy shit i was like wtf and told him to never speak to me like that again or i would report him for sexual harassment (side note: one time he thought i did report him for sexual harassment and was like “who are you gonna buy weed from now?” LITERALLY ANYONE YOU PIECE OF SHIT.) he would always be like “DAMN THICK’ whenever i would bend over and do everything. I TOLD MY MANAGER AT THE TIME. she  didn’t do anything. AND the owners of the franchise definitely knew bc like...there’s cameras and they can hear everything we say? but no one did fucking anything. and i needed the money bad so i had to stay. of course i told him off constantly. he was white and always saying the n word. just a piece of fucking shit. 

i think the happiest day of my life was when he FINALLY got fired. my manager had to go to another city for a week and help out that jimmy johns bc i guess ALL the employees and managers did a walk out (yeah this happens at all the jimmy johns owned locally in my area i wish i was kidding) and left his inept ass in charge. it took him 5 mins to make sandwiches (FREAKY FAST hello????) he was just a poor manager. but THEN he started using k2 again. and he was a zombie. there was no point of him even being there bc like he would just go to the back of the store and just stand in front of the freezer door staring for like 10-15 mins at a time.i was a driver and didnt know how to make sandwiches yet and this bitch seriously was just standing there cracked out of his mind on k2 in FRONT of customers (and i will say our customers were SO nice at least) takking phone calls slurring his words. it was embarrassing. i rememeber i had 2 customers who had waited almost a HALF HOUR for ONE sandwich bc i was having a panic attack and losing my fucking mind trying to make their sandwiches while he was in his truck getting high and refusing to come in. one of the customers actually gave me a tip and told me i was doing great and the other one was like ‘im so sorry this is happening to you, that guy is  fucked up’. anyway, he passed out on k2 in his truck one night and got the cops called on him and got banned from the property :) i still saw him from time to time and he looked disgusting & miserable and it made me so happy. 

mostly we just had grown ass employees, fucking 30 year olds, just acting like children. always on drugs. i had one coworker pretend to slap my ass and i called him out and he was like ‘it’s a joke im not apologizing’. people would try to take deliveries from me. AND LET ME JUST SAY, not even to fucking brag even slighly but i was the best worker there my entire time there bc regardless of where im working i am giving my 100% every day and no one else there would. but ppl always tried to step over me and did not respect me. we had one coworker who had 3 felonies and one day like 4-5 cops came to our store to tell us to call the cops the next time he showed up for work (surprise surprise he fled bc they took an hour to get to the store despite the fact we were literally like not even 4 blocks from the police station) and he was always high on k2. forever late. day after day no call no show. he had his friend get hired on who would go down to subway and talk shit about subway in his uniform??? lmao and subway called us one day and was like ‘can yall not?’ he also threatened to burn down the store and then my manager (who was always on a power trip if we’re being honest) purposefully withheld his paycheck to fuck with him, because he was fucking with her, so we dealt with him WAY longer than we should have? 

then this one bitch that became manager, SOMEHOW, we were seriously always that desperate for staff and we hire anyone bc the managers are overworked af and just want to take the load off. anyway, SHE was always high on k2 as well. and she would always overshare rlly traumatic personal things from her life to me and all the customers and its like....girl we dont wanna hear that pls try and get some help. she was not currently being abused, i wanna specify. she was talking about things from her past. i sympathized with her but like im a victim of dv too lmao i dont wanna see your bruises without being asked first. and then i remember one day i left my money bag there (i kept my tips in it and had like $37 in there or something) and this bitch who was making MORE MONEY THAN ME seriously fucking went into the safe (we caught her on camera lmao) and stole that money out of my bag and left a few bills to make it seem less suspicious i guess??? lied about it to my face? then quit bc she ‘wasnt gonna sit there and be accused of something i didnt do’ like ok lmao

then to top it all off at one point my old manager just stopped giving a fuck and the store went to shit and we got complaint after complaint and she started being so rude to all of her staff, including myself (and we were like besties so i was devastated) and she cut my hours when she was submitting our work times for the checks because i would clock in early to help out....LIKE SHE ASKED? and it was just everything i said to her...her response was just the most rude and hateful voice and just....it was so rude. i cried every single day after work. she eventually got replaced and then quit 

but then this new manager, whom i loved, was very depressed and just had a lot wrong with him mentally but he was still very....drama starting and attention seeking. he would talk about suicide nonstop 24/7 and not to be callous but it just made me so uncomfortable and triggered me so much? they did overwork him and i will attest and agree to that and he had a lot on his shoulders but he couldve gone to mcdonalds literally any day and gotten a job with better hours, better pay, and better benefits. i kept telling him over and over to leave bc he had so much managerial experience he couldve been hired anywhere! all resteraunts down here are perpetually hiring, especially for managers! i would know bc i was looking for another job lmao. but he’d text me every night saying things like ‘well lets hope i drink myself to death’ ‘suicide is painless’ etc. and it was just......VERY uncomfortable for me, as someone who has attempted suicide and still struggles with ideation from time to time lmao it was just the most triggering environment ever 

like idk how i lasted that long but i worked my ass off, saved up my money, have a good paying job and im trying my best to forget this entire experience (honestly i did have some good times) but i really dont....think i can lmao 

ON A POSTIVE NOTE: we had some of the kindest and most caring customers ive ever had in my life. i was shocked. but the amount of times i had a shitty customer in my entire time there i can count on one hand lmao like....even when they were shitty they were like ‘im sorry i know yall work hard and everything’ like i miss my customers SO MUCH because we actually had relationships with them and shit and ugh god. if the customers were shitty tho i would never have kept this job lmfao 

i stayed at this job simply bc i made enough money for rent and my bills perfectly and it was one of the few jobs where i was paid an hourly wage + tips. and i wanted my next job to be a job in my field. that’s why i stuck around so long, it took some time to do that.

so yeah theres my mess i love anyone who read this and you can have my first born and be the beneficiary to my life insurance when i die

[blue-reimu]

messy ramble under cut about life lately. allusions to neglect included but i didnt rlly go indepth, this is pretty much just me being happy about stuff lmao

i moved out of my house recently and wow outside world is kinda wild ngl . in a good waay. i get to eat food other than tinned soup and im allowed to leave my house and i actually see people . going to the store is so fun and makes me so happy even if literally all i do is walk around (tho sometimes the everything makes me dissociate- usually it's only tesco this gets really bad with though idk why?? maybe just cause it's bright and theres lots of people and the music and all of it combined just makes me check out). i can also shower pretty much whenever i need or even want to so ive been doing that way more regularly than i used to in the past and that's pretty great !

also i got a new coat recently at a charity shop and it is probably one of my best financial decisions lately, it's got lots of pockets and it's really comfy and i have a really weird thing where sometimes i dont like not wearing at least one clothing piece thats the colour blue and this coat is blue :)) and since i dont need to wash coats as often as other clothing pieces and it isnt one of those fluffy ones specialised in warming you up ive been wearing it literally everywhere every day and not worrying about the colour of what i have available being an issue. it's really nice kind of teal blue as well with mustard yellow accents on things like the zippers and inside, it's super cool looking im very enthused abt it!!

ive also been able to try new foods!! and coffee that isnt just hot water with plain granules. im finding i really like caramel macchiatos. ive also added prawns to my list of favourite foods because i seem to like them in literally everything i try them in and actively go looking to eat them. my parents were always against me eating a lot of specific seafoods, so ive not had them until now. i also like oreos and banoffee cake. to at least some extent i think im starting to really like food in general, even if i still struggle to eat sometimes. back at my parents house it was hard or sometimes seemingly impossible to find food to eat that wasnt just tinned or processed, but now i get other stuff and it's really nice!

and im going to uni and being able to learn things in a formal environment again is so nice, i never liked school but the way uni works suits me much better ngl. note taking then doing my own research + assignments about a specific thing i enjoy feels much better than how school goes about things. inevitably theres gonna be some stress but for now im enjoying myself. :] theyre also gonna be helping me get support for my disability + mental illness stuff so yay

related, im finally gonna be able to see a doctor! and get checked for.. uhh so many things honestly. and im hopefully getting proper counselling eventually and prooobably more therapy if im honest.

also funny but i got called hot by 2 people today based on a silly online thing and also went through my fifty millionth experience of "are you really a girl???" (context i am AFAB but my voice is incredibly deep and masculine and it always, ALWAYS catches people off guard online when they hear it LMFAO). vc'd with a friend for the first time and he literally had to tell me he needed a moment, he was that shocked apparently. i just sat there politely trying not to laugh lmao and regarding my earlier talking about food, today my sister bought me a coconut frappe and strawberry and cream cheesecake and i really liked those too. ^^ and i sat in the coffee shop we got them from eating them and someone came to sit with me, and we didnt really talk and i was a little nervous but it was nice anyway

today was good overall. i liked living, i liked myself in fact. feelin confident and stuff right now. life is getting better in a lot of ways in general.

this is probably even more messy than i thought it would be but i just wanted to dump my excitement here pfft

[min-hyyun]

The Pal with a Pen

summary: you used to think that having a pen pal was old and out of the trends these days, but when you end up becoming one with a guy carrying the cutest eye smile, you might just be unexpectedly loving it instead.

genre: fluff

a/n: @deepdickdaniel DIS FOR U ARIANE, HAPPY BIRTHDAY GORGEOUS AND ILYSM // *also a disclaimer: i don’t know much about penpals and how it all works, so if something is inaccurate or just completely wrong, please understand !! i had to make up the “site for penpals” thing lolol so i know thAT’S NOT TRUE* **the title for this scenario is rlly cringy im sorry forgive me**

—

→ it was a nice day, and lots of people were out meeting their friends, you included. → you were at a cafe with your friends having countless talks on whatever popped into your mind. → somehow the topic of penpals had come up in your conversation. → because it was quite old and technically out of the trends, you always thought that having a penpal was stupid. → like who could have the time to wait for a single letter and then have to write one back ????? → thats what texting is for lol. → at least that was your opinion. → anyways, your friend had started to talk about it. → “hey, i was doing research for a project and reading some things about penpals. having one seems really cool!” she gushed. → you furrowed your eyebrows and looked at her in curiosity. → “but all you’re doing is sending letters back and forth. is that not what texting’s for nowadays?” → “gosh Y/N,” you other friend started, giggling. → “don’t be such a party pooper. people used to always have penpals back then. and in all those cliche romance movies, the girl and the boy fall in love sending those letters…” she teased, bobbing her eyebrows up and down at you. → you scoffed and jokingly pushed her slightly to the side. → “that only happens in the movies.” → “but,” she began, “it could happen in real life too. don’t you think it’s cool?” → you shook your head firmly. → “you could literally talk to someone across the world and be really good friends with them! maybe even lovers..” → you shook your head again, tuning out of the conversation and looking outside the window of the cafe. →having a penpal couldn’t be that interesting, could it? plus, its a hassle having to get the letter to them. → your friend grabbed your arm and threw it around. → “why don’t you get a penpal? then you can see how cool it is! i swear, by the time you have one, thats all you’ll be talking about.” → “i doubt it.” you retorted back. → “you’ll see.” → to prove her wrong, the two of your made a bet about this whole penpal thing. → if you ended up liking this whole penpal thing, you would have to buy her coffee for the next month. → but if you didn’t, she would be buying you your favourite donuts for a month →it’s a win-win situation, you thought. → so fast forward to the next week. → you had found a website that connected you to many penpals around the world. → not wanting to talk to someone so far away, you chose someone in South Korea, where you currently resided. → you received their information, and started the letter after the site let you know that the person you paired with had been alerted that the two of you were matched together. → starting your letter, it was very awkward and embarrassing, despite being in the comfort of your own home. →  “hmm… what am I supposed to put? this is so weird, ive never done anything like this.” → finally, after a good few hours, you were able to muster up a short paragraph introducing yourself and how you were new to this whole thing. → “hopefully this’ll do, but im still not sure how much i like this..” you trailed off. → it was late, so you decided to send off the mail in the morning. → the penpal was in South Korea, so you expected that it wouldn’t take long for you to get a reply back. → and you were right. → about a week later, two pieces of mail had arrived at your doorstep. → one of them containing your bank account information, and the other being unknown. → throwing the known letter to the side, your eyes lingered over the white, small paper in your hand with an address you had seen before. → “hm?” and then you realized, it was your penpal’s address. → hOLY CRAP !!!!!!!!! → YOU WEREN’T EXPECTING THE LETTER TO COME BACK FOR ANOTHER WEEK !!!! → YOU WEREN’T MENTALLY READY FOR THIS !!!!!!! → your eyes went big, and you almost tripped over your own feet. → not wanting to open the mail yet, you examined the front of the letter. → you noticed that the writing was very neat and organized. → and the name read “Kang Daniel” in both Korean and English with a smiley face next to it. → interesting, you thought. → you grabbed the pair of scissors on the counter beside you, and opened the mail. → you immediately saw a pink piece of paper inside, and a blue jelly candy along with a blue sticker. → “huh?” you whispered to yourself, “how old is this guy?” → the colours and candy threw you off, and now you were thinking that you may have stated talking to a little boy and not someone your age. → if this was a younger boy you had began to talk to, there was no way you would continue this bet. → you would drop this so-called penpal right this second. → but because you were nice and didn’t like to judge, you decided that you would just open up the letter and choose then. → picking out the jelly, you examined it. → “hmm.. doesn’t seem bad.” you said, before popping it into your mouth and tasting the sweet flavour of blueberry. → you grasped the smooth paper in your fingers, swiftly flipping it open and beginning to read the continuously neat writing. → you read the words aloud. → “Hello Y/N! My name is Kang Daniel, and I’m excited to be your penpal..” you trailed off. → you slowly read the rest of the letter, and by the end, you unconsciously held a wide grin. → but once you realized, you immediately stopped grinning. → “no, stop it Y/N. you need to win the bet.” → you quickly wrote a letter back to Daniel, and waited about another week. → this time in your letter, you bluntly asked for a photo of Daniel, just so you know who you were talking to. → when you had received a reply, and small photo had fallen out just as you ripped opened the white packaging. → you eyes stared at the photo of Daniel. → WOW !!! → HE WAS A GOD ! → so he was nice and good-looking ??? → you scored a good one Y/N. → you just had to admit, he carried the cutest eye smile, along with his similarity to a bunny. → it made your heart warm, but that feeling wasn’t there for long. → you just happened to remember the bet, and how this guy might not be what you think he is. → as you read further on the letter, you noticed that he wanted a picture back. → you thought about it, and decided, why not? → taking your polaroid, you took a simple photo of part of your face, not wanting to show the whole thing. → slipping the polaroid into your envelope, you began your response back. → as you wrote, you didn’t forget to mention that he had a very nice smile. → and as you thought about it again, your heart tingled and you felt yourself getting hot. → stop blushing Y/N! this is so weird… → and as expected, his reply came within the next three days of sending yours out. → grasping the thin paper in the envelope and reading it, you almost fainted. → “he wants to meet me?! but we’ve only been talking for like, three weeks!” → your friend sighed, “just meet him. you saw what he looked like anyway. what if he’s even better looking in person?” → you blushed slightly at the thought, but brushed it off and responded back. → “even so, isn’t it dangerous? this guy could be a murder for all i know!” → she shook her head, grabbed you by the shoulders roughly, and turned you around. → “for some reason, i don’t know why, just trust me. i have a good feeling about him.” → because she was your closest friend, you had a hard time saying no, and in the end, you backed down anyway. → her puppy eyes and persuasive words got you every single time. → you got home that night, and had a lot of time for yourself to just think about what to do. → of course, you wrote a simple letter back to Daniel, giving him the okay and where to meet. → “hm.. maybe the cafe? yes, the cafe! okay, now, how do i make sure i’m not meeting a total stranger who could possibly kidnap me?” your night ended on those thoughts, as you wanted to complete the rest of the letter in the next day. → in the following morning, you rushed to complete the letter to Daniel. → “sit in the back corner of the shop, and ask for Jisung to make two iced Americanos for us..” you recited the words as you wrote them onto the page. → not long after that, you phoned Jisung. → it would have been weird if Daniel asked for Jisung without knowing anything, so you called him to let him know of the situation and who Daniel was. → (also to make sure Daniel wasn’t dangerous lolol). → “hey, Jisung?” → you instantly heard a cheery voice on the other end of the line, and knew immediately that it was him. → “Hey Y/N! What’s up?” → “so..” you started, giving him the instructions so that you wouldn’t die the day you meet Daniel. → after Jisung heard all of this, the only thing that came out of his mouth was, “how many Americanos?” → needless to say, you face palmed super hard. → Daniel’s letter got to you about a week later, saying that he was excited to meet you, and that he’d be expecting some good quality drinks when he got there. → (and so, about a week later, when you two were scheduled to meet, he did indeed enjoy the Americano, but never told you that). → the day you both met would forever be unforgettable, especially because it was the day you saw that Daniel was very very good-looking in person with a beautiful smile. → you walked into the cafe that day, with Jisung greeting you at the counter and pointing to the furthest table at the back. → you quickly strode over to him, and asked him a question as quick pep-talk. → “Jisung! is everything fine?” your words were quick because you were nervous, and obviously he noticed that and laughed. → “don’t be so nervous Y/N. he seems like a good guy, i swear.” you nodded and bid him a small smile, leaving the area and walking off towards the back of the cafe. → your eyes immediately caught the familiar sight of light pink, almost peachy hair. → your heart started beating, and you felt your face become very hot. → as well as your hands, which started to sweat profusely. → as soon as you got close enough, you called out to him, getting his attention straight away. → “Daniel…?” → oh my god. → his face was so much better looking in person. → “Y/N?” his mouth fell agape as you got even more nervous as he just stared at you. → “Yeah, its me.” → “wow,” he spoke, “the other half of your face is even better than I expected.” → you relaxed, and laughed at his cheesiness. → after that first meeting, there was no way you guys didn’t feel anything for one another. → it only took a few months for Daniel to ask you out at the same cafe, where Jisung happily congratulated you guys with muffins and iced americanos. → he would always back hug you, and kiss your forehead (its actually one of his favourite things to do). → he prefers to hold your hand, so whenever the two of you are out together he’ll always just randomly take your hand and intertwine it with his, saying cheesy stuff like: → “wow it’s like your hand was made just for mine.” → “your hand looks heavy, let me hold it for you.” → and the best one: → “can i see your hand for a second?” → and whenever you mindlessly hold out your hand for him, he always smoothly slides his into yours. → “thanks, your hands looked lonely so i thought i’d keep them company.” → and one day, when you were out with your close friend once again, out shopping with each other, she popped a statement that made you laugh. → “so, when do i get my coffee for a month?” → you laughed and jokingly rolled your eyes. → “soon!”

[lisboy]

@x3carlyx3 thank you for tagging me hehe (i’m super late oops)

1ST RULE: tag 9 people you want to get to know better : @planetyardium @goldenvarnish @button-button-button @no2da @livinka-n-diland @bibliophilesbian @mononoke-maiden and uuh anyone who wants to (dw if you don’t want to do it, it’s cool ! 👍🏻) 

2nd RULE: BOLD the statements that are true ((commentary in double parentheses))

APPEARANCE: · I am 5'7"(~170 cm) or taller · I wear glasses {or contacts} · I have at least one tattoo · I have at least one piercing  · I have blonde hair · I have brown eyes · I have short hair · My abs are at least somewhat defined · I have or had had braces

PERSONALITY: · I love meeting new people ((it depends i guess. sometimes i love it, sometimes i kind of hate it until i’m used to them ; idk) · People tell me that I’m funny (or at least that my behaviors are funny) ((people usually tell me i’m weird, probably because i do dumb shit like sitting on the floor or wear funny clothes ; but really i’m not)) · Helping others with their problems is a big priority for me · I enjoy physical challenges · I enjoy mental challenges · I’m playfully rude with people I know well · I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it · There is something I would change about my personality ((i think too much about the past, i can’t seem to forget mildly embarrassing stuff i did like 8 years ago and it still makes me cringe, guh))

ABILITY: · I can sing well · I can play an instrument  · I can do over 30 pushups without stopping · I’m a fast runner · I can draw well · I have a good memory · I’m good at doing math in my head · I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute · I have beaten at least 2 people in arm wrestling · I know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch · I know how to throw a proper punch ((ooh id love to know how to punch...)

HOBBIES: · I enjoy playing sports ((ive always been bad at sports and i overheat so fast i can’t really play anything without becoming so red i can feel my skin burn lol. But i kind of like stuff such as badminton or long jump, even though i suck at it. It can be pretty fun though !) · I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else · I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else ·I have learned a new song in the past week · I work out at least once a week ·I’ve gone for runs at least once a week in the warmer months  · I have drawn something in the past month · I enjoy writing · fandoms are my #1 passion  · I do or have done martial arts

EXPERIENCES: · I have had my first kiss  · I have had alcohol ((i mean i don’t drink because alcohol is disgusting, but i know what it tastes like) · I have scored the winning goal in a sports game · I have watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting · I have been at an overnight event · I have been in a taxi · I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year · I have beaten a video game in one day · I have visited another country · I have been to one of my favorite band’s concerts ((i’m really not fond of concerts but i went to see mitski last year. There were too many people, the volume was way too high for me and it was sooo hot even tho it was only february, but i enjoyed the music i guess. It made me realize no matter what the concert is i won’t 100% enjoy it :/ ))

MY LIFE: · I have at least one person I consider a “best friend” ((i am full of love for my friends !!) · I live close to my school · My parents are still together · I have at least one sibling ((my little sisters art blog is @planetyard-art you should check it out !)) · I live in the United States · There is snow right now where I live ((i WISH)) · I have hung out with a friend in the past month · I have a smartphone ((i technically own a very very old smartphone, but it’s so old and broken i can’t even write texts anymore. I need to change but phones are expensive and addictive hmm) · I have at least 15 CDs · I share my room with someone

RELATIONSHIPS: · I’m in a relationship · I have a crush on a celebrity · I have a crush on someone I know · I have been in at least 3 relationships · I have never been in a relationship (my romantic life is nonexistent lol but i dont rlly care) · I have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them · I get crushes easily ((ive had like 3 crushes in my entire life tbh, it’s almost funny))· I had a crush on someone for over a year · I have been in a relationship for at least a year · I have had feelings for a friend

RANDOM SHIT: · I have breakdanced · I know a person named Jamie · I have had a teacher with the last name that’s hard to pronounce · I have dyed my hair · I’m listening to one song on repeat right now · I have punched someone in the past week · I know someone who has gone to jail · I have broken a bone · I have eaten a waffle today · I know what I want to do with my life · I speak at least 2 languages (i know french & english, i used to be good at spanish but i havent spoken it in almost 4 years ! i still understand it fairly well though. And i kinda..... know a bit of japanese........ but even after 5 years of official academic studies i'd be unable to speak to someone for more than 10 mns ive got so little confidence when it comes to japanese) · I have made a new friend in the past year (hmm.. ive talked to many new people but i don’t really consider them friends. They’re nice and all but we don’t hang out outisde of class so we’re not close, which is a shame !)

[memedokies]

(almost) every anon ask since fall 2016

if u havent noticed i am BAD at answering asks so here’s a Big Dump of most of the asks i’ve gotten in the past few months

ps; i’ve excluded pokemon suggestions bc i plan on getting to them at some point

Hihihi!!! What brushes do you use in fire alpaca??  i dont do much in firealpaca (esp not lately lol) but when i did use it a lot i just used the fill bucket and the standard/default brush to fill in gaps n such lol! i dont really draw in it, i used flash/adobe animate for the lineart and just fill in color in firealpaca :3

when did you start animating?   uhh when i was around 11 or 12 when i started digital art i guess? i just used photoshop for the longest time then got flash when i was like 15 or so

 How did you get flash?  i got the creative cloud dealie, its technically required for my school :—-0 

 hello!! what are you majoring in in vcu?? im thinking about going there for college  im in communication arts! omg cool lmk if u come here ill tell u where to get the best bubble tea

 how many fps do you use for your wiggly animations? i work at 24 fps in flash on twos but just end up using photoshop’s 0 second frame delay/ “no delay”?

 Hey love your animations! What do you animate with?  adobe animate 2017! (previously flash) 

You mentioned a YouTube channel but I can’t seem to find a link to it? Do you post processes on there? https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCovvoZxlQjFaIA7A3w_94Zw theres not much atm but i plan on posting a lot more, including process/speedpaints! 

i really like your art style gosh darn!!! everythings so fluid and stylized and nice aaa (also ur animations are goals) do u have any tips for someone still developing their artstyle????  WAH TYSM!!!!! compile art you already like and incorporate aspects from their styles into yours, BUT dont limit urself to one style! if u like something then try it out! do straight up copies (as PRACTICE, DONT CLAIM IT as your own ofc) of stuff you like to see how they work and what you’re clicking with. spending time on fundamentals is MEGA helpful so keep going back to that too! USE REFERENCES!!! draw …from ur soul…what makes u ..FEEL good

 how do you make that burn effect on your lineart? it makes it your pieces look sharper and even more interesting, it’s super cool!!  when i used to use flash for lineart and firealpaca for coloring a lot, setting the lineart layer on BURN with the coloring layer seeping a lil past the lineart would get this effect automatically 

(like on the whiskers. u can see it gets a brighter brown(?) and the warmer yellow on the ears)

but since then i’ve been using sai+photoshop more so i just do it manually! i’ll use this funny pic of me and my cat as an example lol

^i select the lineart/everything i want the funky color around

^slam that INCREMENT button a couple times

^make a new layer under the lineart

^fill that puppo with ur preferred color! something brighter works best, or even straight up white

that’ll give you something like this

then i open it in photoshop

and i mess with the pink line layer’s blending mode..color burn usually does the trick but depending on the Look you’re going for, saturation, multiply and overlay have some similar effects that look cool. 

i also usually get rid of the outermost edge of pink line that’s visible around the lineart, just so it looks a little cleaner? to do that you just select around your lineart, increment/expand selection, and delete/erase in the selection of the pink line layer

uhh yeah! lmk if anyone needs clarification on this, i have some other #TIPS on makin ur art look crusty and funky so…lemme know if you’re interested :—3

What do you use to animate? And, a more specific question, how do you make transparent animated gifs? adobe animate 2017! (previously flash) i export my animation from flash as a png sequence then open it in photoshop, where the background will be transparent and save it as a gif from there nyaaa

if anyone needs more clarification lmk and i’ll make a proper walkthrough :-0

 Hello!! Ur art is rlly pretty and so inspirational and nice to look at!! 💗💗 I was wonderin’ if ya had any tips on choosing shapes for characters? Like, when you draw shapes for a certain character, it looks rlly like it fits with the character’s personality n stuff!! ( e.g: Your Love Live! drawings!! The characters look so good in your style.) I’ve always admired how u did that n was hoping for some tips maybe?? Anyways, have a good day!!💛💖💟💜💝💞💖 HOOGA!! TYSM!!! and YEA you basically guessed it, i mainly just think about the character’s personality and translate that into a shape or Pheeling… 

especially for anime characters i look at the Very Subtle differences in the character’s original design..or possibly canon implications…for example kotori has slightly different eyes (it also says on her wiki page she has soft droopy eyes!) so i make sure to incorporate that Detãile

 anime wiki pages that have details like that is nice, for love live they have cute lil “charm points” which is really cool n helpful! listening to how a character is described in their world can give clues to what differentiates them which you can make more clear in your design

taking into account each characters context is good too, what they do/hobby/personality and how that could affect their appearance/posture/attitude

 YEAH its really fun to figure out certain characteristics and make it evident in their appearance! or. idk thats just what i do lol. hopefully this helps!

Have you ever seen the anime jojos bizarre adventure? alas i have not..i have some friends whom are into it so i’ll prob end up watching it sometime lol

sorry if this is obvious but!! are you the creator of Fork and Knife: Food Fighters?? your gif of fork is super cute btw!! yes i am!! wah tysm!!

Hey my little sister found your animation on an online art gallery and she really loved it! omg cool, thanks so much!!

Your style is so lovely!! OHG thanks!

your blog is so precious i love it a lot! your art is so cute too ^u^ waa thanks!!

Your art and animations art really cool! Keep up the good work! You are amazing!! aahg thank you!! :’333

 your art is fuckening amazing hh broe…tysm

 Oh my gee, I used to follow you on Deviant Art, and now here I am, finding you on accident. You’re still as talented as ever. =w= b hUIOpugh deviantart, my homeland..my origin.. thank you!!!

- O mg I love your art! 💕💕💕 thank you!! heart emojis!!! 💖💖💖

- your art and animations give me so much inspiration, thank you! everything about your style is so fun and it cheers me up omg this validates my top tier goal in life, im so glad!! thank you SO much!

Your style is so charming and adorable ;__; thank you!!

ur art is so gross in the best way possible this is the biggest compliment ive gotten thank u so much. i love making gross squishy awful drawings

IM SO HAPPY I FOUND YOU!!!! IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU FOR AGES!!!!!!!!! I LIVE FOR YOUR BEAUTIFUL ART!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!! BHOLY CRAP THANK YOU!!!

 your art style is very cute ! 🌱 oohg thanks!! thanks for the little sprout emoji, i love her

GOOD ART!!!! good art good art good art EVERYWHERE I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!! OHHGG THANK YUO

how do ya draw such cutely its driving me nuts Nuts NUTS !!! I LOVE SPARKLES AND BRIGHT COLORS AND FUNNY ANIMALS..its my lifeblood..thank u.. 

You’re a really rad artist! I’m Glad there’s some cool artists that are local! Have a good time at VCU! oh wow thanks!! 

Ur shapes r so good thanks i LOVE a nice wholesome shape!

I rlly like ur art style my dude thanks!! 

hi! just wanted to let u know that you’re wonderful and i wish u well in everything u do this is making me bVERY HAPPY THANK YOU SO MUCH!!

 Im love You!! IM L OVE YIOU

that meowth boy is so good. i love him as he is my son THANK YUO i too, love meowth a Lot

 I love how your art is basically lines and curves, it’s very cute oo thanks! 

i love your art style so much!! it’s so zesty? i cant think of a better word to describe but its like. zesty & refreshing & rly rly cool !!! THATS A BEAUTIFUL ADJECTIVE I LOVE IT thank u so much!!!

You seem like you would watch Osomatsu-san. I could see you drawin dem bois in you hella rad art style. osomatsu was the wildest ride of my life. tho i dont think i could physically be able to sit down and draw them seriously ever… 

 Pls make more angry cat comics theyr so halarious plllls 👀 more are on the way!!!!!!

Have you done a meet the artist i sketched one when the meme was still poppin..is it too late lol? maybe i’ll still do it

[lovenletter]

♡ get to know me tag ♡

aaa, i was tagged by @8boo. thank you sooo much !!! tbh i should be doing my online class ,,,, but LOL NOPE. online classes are such a pain bc I always get distracted ..... it’s tumblr’s fault ..... that’s okay, right ???

Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag 10 people.

THE LAST:

1. Drink: orange juice ... 2. Phone call: to my dad, i think?? 3. Text message: i’m currently texting one of my friends bc she has a match later on today and i won’t see her :( 4. Song you listened to: i’m listening to music right now ??? it’s beautiful by seventeen :’)

5. Time you cried: yesterday bc language barriers lol

HAVE YOU:

6. Dated someone twice: or dating in general .... no

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: nope

8. Been cheated on: no 9. Lost someone special: yeah 10. Been depressed: kind of, but like not rly 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: i’ve never been drunk haha

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12-14: gray, peach, and ive been digging purple lately

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: yessss !!!! 16. Fallen out of love: i’ve not been in love ??? 17. Laughed until you cried: so many times hahaha 18. Found out someone was talking about you: im not interesting, no one talks ab me.

19. Met someone who changed you: all my new friends helped me to be a better person :) 20. Found out who your friends are: .... good people ??? 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: no. why facebook?

GENERAL:

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: all of them ??? they’re just my famil tbh. i dont’ rlly use it ... 23. Do you have any pets: not in my house, but my cousin has been taking care of my pet. 24. Do you want to change your name: nahhhh. i like my name. 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: i had a sleepover. i don’t rlly do much for my birthdays :/ 26. What time did you wake up: twelve p.m .... 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: probably on my phone ... or talking to my mom. 28. Name something you can’t wait for: july !!!!! i get to go back home + see if I can go to diamond edge !!! :))))))) 29. When was the last time you saw your mom: she’s sitting right next to me right now. 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: i can’t rlly come up with anything ??? maybe starting to play tennis earlier so that i’d be better now lol. 31. What are you listening right now: still lonely by seventeen lol 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: yes, kind of. tom is like the “president” of our neighborhood. 34. Most visited Website: probably between tumblr & twitter (more tumblr tbh).

LOST QUESTIONS.

35. Mole/s: i have a ton ... i got like five on my face and over five in each arm and leg ://// 36. Mark/s: like scars ??? i have one under my chin from when i fell down the stairs as a child. then i have one on my upper thigh bc i ran through a boat hook. i have matching ones on my legs, but they’re disappearing ... finally. 37. Childhood dream: to own a hotel lol

38. Hair Colour: it’s brown .. but it gets like blonde streaks in the summer naturally 39. Long or short hair: it’s like in between ?? it’s not rlly long, but it’s not short. 40. Do you have a crush on someone: hehehe no.

41. What do you like about yourself: i guess that i get stuff done and im dedicated ??? does that count 42. Piercings: my ears 43. Bloodtype: o positive :) 44. Nickname: my name is too short for a nickname lol. 45. Relationship status: when have i not been single. 46. Zodiac: libra sun - taurus moon - pisces rising 47. Pronouns: she/her, but like they/them works too.

48. Favorite TV Show: i have watched every single episode of house and ncis ... also my mom & i watch reign together :) 49. Tattoos: nope 50. Right or left hand: right !!! i cant write with my left like at all. 51. Surgery: when i was little, to take out something from my throat i dont rlly know.

52. Hair dyed in different color: i dyed highlights once and then tried to fix the “crown” effect but then it looked orange. tho i rlly want to dye it gray/silver. :) 53. Sport: tennis !!! ... i’ve been practicing three hours a day since summer started hahaha. 55. Vacation: boy, i’ve been to a lot of places. like i counted the amount  of countries i’ve been to recently and i think it’s 25 ??? 56. Pair of trainers: like ??? i have a two pairs of white shoes i use to practice in ??? does that count ??? idk.

MORE GENERAL:

57. Eating Currently: i had a bagel for breakfast lol 58. Drinking currently: water lol

59. I’m about to: either do my online class or watch suspicious partner haha.

61. Waiting for: to go home. i have my albums there and i have not opened any of them ,,,,,, 62. Want: money. a. lot. of. it. pls. 63. Get married: at some point ??? right ... 64. Career: i dont have a job rn and i have no idea what i want to do in the future lol.

WHICH IS BETTER

65. Hugs or kisses: both !!! they are equally amazing. 66. Lips or eyes: .... i mean i look at both ??? 67. Shorter or taller: what ... i mean im taller ... and i get jealous of short ppl. 68. Older or younger: what even. all my friends are older ??? 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: both ??? but it doesn’t rlly matter. 71. Sensitive or loud: both ??? why not 72. Hook up or relationship: swerve both 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: wait what. i guess hesitant ??

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. Kissed a stranger: nope 75. Drank hard liquor: ... yes  76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: no, i rarely use my glasses and my contacts are dailies so. 77. Turned someone down: yes. sorry. 78. Sex in the first date: hahaha no 79. Broken someone’s heart: well ... i guess when i turned them down ??? idk. 80. Had your heart broken: not really.

81. Been arrested: no. 82. Cried when someone died: no ?? i mean in movies, yes 83. Fallen for a friend: yeah, but they liked my best friend instead :////

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84. Yourself: yeah i guess 85. Miracles: yes 86. Love at first sight: ehhhh, it’s a nice idea 87. Santa Claus: no 88. Kiss in the first date: depends ... 89. Angels: yes ??? maybe

OTHER:

90. Current best friends’ names: irl ... i have a group of four and our names are similar so we call our groupchat SLX2. but like online ??? all my mutuals :) 92. Favorite movie: oh boy ... i watch so many movies. i love leap year, the imitation game, intersteller, and the intouchables !!! that’s just a few lol

this is a rlly long tag !!! but it’s fun :) if you don’t want to do it, it’s fine. oh !!! and let me know if you don’t want to be tagged.

i tag: @calamityy , @youngjai , @hyungwon , @m0nst4x , @chamgmin , @jeonghhan , @curlypcy , @jpghope , @innohurry , @ilyoonqi !!!!! 

[keunakool]

Get to Know Me Tag!

Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people.  tagged by @the-mockingbird-flies !! thank you, thank you! i miss you so much :cc i hope kcon is going to be awesome for you!! 

THE LAST:

1. Drink: Sweet tea 2. Phone call: I think it was my Pappaw? 3. Text message: to my friend spence!! 4. Song you listened to: into the Void - Vixx 5. Time you cried: Today because I got overwhelmed by my summer work and like some other stupid things hnng

HAVE YOU: 6. Dated someone twice: Nah. 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: Nah. 8. Been cheated on: No. 9. Lost someone special: uuuuh,,, not really. one of my favorite friends on here ended up deactivating tho and i don’t know where to find her :cc 10. Been depressed: nah. i’ve had like intense mood drops, but it’s never been as serious as depression. 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: nah. i don’t really like drinking or being around it.

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS: 12-14: Black, pink, blue!

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 15. Made new friends: Plenty!! 16. Fallen out of love: Never been in ufufu  17. Laughed until you cried: more often than not ;; 18. Found out someone was talking about you: hmmm,, i think so? it doesn’t happen often though. at least i hope not aghh 19. Met someone who changed you: i don’t think so! 20. Found out who your friends are: ooooooh you bet your ass lmfao may reconsider some yikes 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: uhh technically yeah ig

GENERAL: 22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: um,, hnng i have a rp blog so only like 7-8?  23. Do you have any pets: 3 cats, 1 dog, and a turtle :o 24. Do you want to change your name: not particularly. i kinda like my name even though no one spells it right 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: probably nothing tbh? like i don’t really celebrate my birthday. i go eat dinner, get money as a gift, and then go home. 26. What time did you wake up: uuuuuh sometime around 3 pm 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: playing arms!! anyone else a min min main? 28. Name something you can’t wait for: getting my summer work done that’s for sure!! hmm also miitopia! i’ve been excited since the demo dropped

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: uuh just a little bit ago. she came in and took some watermelon out of the kitchen

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: literally every time i fuck up and say something to someone that i didn’t mean at all hnng i do it a lot and then have to pretend i never said it in hopes they forget too 31. What are you listening right now: b-day - ikon 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom:  my great uncle’s name was tom! 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: my summer work and like some other things  34. Most visited Website: youtube and instagram probably. i come on tumblr a lot but im more likely to look through the other two  

LOST QUESTIONS. I JUST PUT IN RANDOM INFO ABOUT ME 35. Mole/s: i have one on my neck and i hate it tbh i rlly want it removed. i also have on my left titty hnng 36. Mark/s: ACNE SCARS GALORE BOIIS. i also have a deep scar on my knee and a long scar on my arm 37. Childhood dream: i wanted to be a photographer and go to london and take pictures with the boy who i thought i was going to marry at the time omfg

38. Haircolor: light brown

39. Long or short hair: short 40. Do you have a crush on someone: hNNG YES aND it;S MEsSING ME UP EVERY DAY BOI HAS BEEN WILDIN’ LATELY IT’S DRIVIN’ ME NUTS

41. What do you like about yourself: i think i’m funny!! and i’m really good at making friends!! 42. Piercings: ears and my nose 43. Bloodtype: B negative i think? 44. Nickname: ash, fish, lyn, uuuh i think that’s it :o @the-mockingbird-flies called me baby for a while 45. Relationship status: single single but ... im workin’ on it 46. Zodiac: scorpio 47. Pronouns: She/Her 48. Favorite TV Show: Voltron, Death Note, and Weeds! 49. Tattoos: none :cc i’m hoping to get one on my finger eventually 50. Right or left hand: Right 51. Surgery: never had any! 52. Hair dyed in different color: um like all the time. i’ve had black hair, blonde, purple, red... i think blue for awhile? 53. Sport: //VOMITS 55. Vacation: Japan!! but i also want to go back to NYC 56. Pair of trainers: trainers are sneakers right,,, if so, then one

MORE GENERAL: 57. Eating: uh nothing rn 58. Drinking: nooothing 59. I’m about to: do my ap summer work even though ive been working on it since 4 and it’s midnight now 61. Waiting for: sleep tbh but also blackpink’s comeback 62. Want: uuuuuuuh to go off but if i do i’ll regret it so im,,, sitting in anger as ya girl does 63. Get married: yES PLEASE UGH I LOVE LOVE I WANT SOMEONE TO LOVE ME ENOUGH TO ACTUALLY WANT TO LOOK AT ME EVERY DAY 64. Career: im...hoping to have one of those

WHICH IS BETTER 65. Hugs or kisses: Hugs!! I feel less awkward and it just feels better anyways 66. Lips or eyes: hmmm,,, i was going to say lips but i rlly do like different eye colors and shapes. like i love bright blues ok 67. Shorter or taller: TALLER 68. Older or younger: i prefer someone older ngl 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: hmm tummy doesn’t bother me but i do love like a rlly good pair of arms (tho tbh im actually a leg girl) 71. Sensitive or loud: hmmm sensitive?

72. Hook up or relationship: relationship

73. Troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant. i don’t have the patience nor the mind to deal with anybody that’s w1ld

HAVE YOU EVER: 74. Kissed a stranger: No 75. Drank hard liquor: Nope and I don’t plan to 76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: i don’t believe so! 77. Turned someone down: you mean like all the time? 78. Sex on the first date: nah 79. Broken someone’s heart: uuuh possibly yeah 80. Had your heart broken: lol nah 81. Been arrested: nope! 82. Cried when someone died: i cried when my guinea pig died 83. Fallen for a friend: uuuuuh yeeee 

DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 84. Yourself: m...maybe?? 85. Miracles: yeah 86. Love at first sight: nah. you have to work on that shit. 87. Santa Claus: u mean papi 88. Kiss in the first date: depends on the atmosphere and comfort level 89. Angels: nah

OTHER: 90. Current best friends name: @the-mockingbird-flies ♥♥♥ || @the-lonely-flute ♥♥♥ || @knkruinedmylife ♥♥♥ || @batl7 ♥♥♥ || @plsinx ♥♥♥ 91. Eyecolor: blue! 92. Favorite movie: Spirited Away

uuuh ill tag the best friends who haven’t done it bc im lazy

[yikesforever]

tag games you didn’t ask for

i had three tag games to do thanks to kate, cam and cameron so here they are, ill tag these people, but yall rlly don’t have to do any of them, i was jus bored

@bicevans @capswilson @dobrevninas @daisyridlay @napoleonsolos @soldatsass @beefybucky

fav hoe @daddybucks​ tagged me in this one

1. coke or pepsi: neither?? (coke i guess) 2. disney or dreamworks: disney !!! 3. coffee or tea: my main bitch coffee 4. books or movies: movies binch 5. windows or mac: windows 6. dc or marvel: marvel 7. x-box or playstation: i always liked playstation better but i dont have a reason?? 8. dragon age or mass effect: are these games that i dont get 9. night owl or early riser: night owl 10. cards or chess: cards 11. chocolate or vanilla: vanilla 12. vans or converse: vans (i have neither but i guess yeah) 13. Lavellan, Trevelyan, Cadash, or Adaar: ??? 14. fluff or angst: i can write angst but i’d rather read fluff 15. beach or forest: forest 16. dogs or cats: dogs 17. clear skies or rain: clear skies during the day, rain at night 18. cooking or eating out: cooking 19. spicy food or mild food: spicy 20. halloween/samhain or solstice/yule/christmas: …. thanksgiving 21. would you rather forever be a little too cold or a little too hot: too cold 22. if you could have a superpower, what would it be: superserum i think, or speed like barry 23. animation or live action: live action (i dont trust new animated movies) 24. paragon or renegade: ???? 25. baths or showers: showers 26. team cap or team ironman: team cap !!! 27. fantasy or sci-fi: im leaning towards sci fi but i feel like fantasy and sci fi are so fucking similar that sci fi could be a subcategory of fantasy 28. do you have three or four favourite quotes, if so what are they: okay well prolly anything about cevans has ever said is prolly my fav but um:  “When people say life is short its not its not, its not. We make it short because we are very preoccupied, with ya know, we spend a lot of time worrying about the past and we spend a lot of time analyzing the future. Before you know it time goes by.” - cevans  ”Had a fourth iced coffee today, I didn’t want to but I did” - sebstan ”With out art the earth is just eh” & “do not go gentle into that good night”  i also love anything disney tbh  29. youtube or netflix: netflix 30. harry potter or percy jackson: harry potter (cause ive never seen percy jackson besides in 10th grade english) 31. when you feel accomplished: lmao when a gifset gets 1k+ 32. star wars or star trek: star wars !!!!!!! 33. paperback books or hardback books: paperback 34. horror or rom-com: rom-com 35. tv shows or movies: tv shows (even if all my favs are movie actors) 36. favorite animal: dogs or polar bears 37. favorite genre of music: bahaha i guess indie  38. least favorite book: the red badge of courage... i have extreme hate for that fucking book 39. favourite season: spring 40. sparkly or shiny: shiny 41. favorite character in a tv series: MY SAD GAY SON TJ HAMMOND 42. do you have/want any tattoos and if you do, what are they?: i dont have one but i want like 4... i want the tree of life from animal kingdom with the quote we are one underneath it, an aries constellation, a mountain range, and my dads signature from his drawings 43. If you could only eat one type of food for the rest of your life, what would it be?: if id never get sick of it... prolly mexican or thai food.  44. If you had to wake up one day, magically knowing how to do something you didn’t know how to the day before, what would it be? how to adult tbh, its too stressful

both of my loves @daddysteven​ & @daddybucks​ tagged me for this one (i cant believe how many of my friends have daddy urls but okay)

APPEARANCE:

I am 5′7″ or taller (??? i might be 5′6″)

I wear glasses

I have at least one tattoo

I have at least one piercing

I have blonde hair

I have brown eyes

I have short hair

My abs are at least somewhat defined

I have or have had braces

There is something I would change about the way I look

PERSONALITY:

My Hogwarts house is: Gryffindor Hufflepuff Ravenclaw Slytherin

I am an introvert

I like meeting new people

People tell me that I’m funny

Helping others with their problems is a big priority for me

I enjoy physical challenges

I enjoy mental challenges

I’m playfully rude with people I know well

I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it

There is something I would change about my personality

ABILITY:

I can sing well

I can play an instrument

I can do over 30 pushups without stopping

I’m a fast runner

I can draw well

I have a good memory

I’m good at doing math in my head

I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute

I have beaten at least 2 people in arm wrestling

I know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch

I know how to throw a proper punch

HOBBIES:

I enjoy playing sports

I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else

I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else

I have learned a new song in the past week

I work out at least once a week

I’ve gone for runs at least once a week in the warmer months

I have drawn something in the past month

I enjoy writing

Fandoms are my #1 passion

I do or have done martial arts

EXPERIENCES:

I have had my first kiss

I have had alcohol

I have scored the winning goal in a sports game

I have watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting

I have been at an overnight event

I have been in a taxi

I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year

I have beaten a video game in one day

I have visited another country

I have been to one of my favourite band’s concerts

RELATIONSHIP:

I’m in a relationship

I have a celebrity crush

I have a crush on someone I know

I have been in at least 3 relationships

I have never been in a relationship

I have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them

I get crushes easily

I have had a crush on someone for over a year

I have been in a relationship for at least a year

I have had feelings for a friend

MY LIFE:

I have at least one person I consider a “best friend”

I live close to my school

My parents are still together

I have at least one sibling

I live in the United States

There is snow right now where I live

I have hung out with a friend outside of school in the past month

I have a smartphone

I have at least 15 CDs

I share my room with someone

RANDOM SHIT:

I have breakdanced

I know a person named Jamie

I have had a teacher with a last name that’s hard to pronounce

I have dyed my hair

I’m listening to one song on repeat right now

I have punched someone in the past week

I know someone who has gone to jail

I have broken a bone

I have eaten a waffle today (fuck i wish i did)

I know what I want to do with my life

I speak at least 2 languages fluently

I have made a new friend in the past year (ya im talking bout yall)

i was tagged by @officialhermionegranger​

Name — natalie Nicknames — nat  Zodiac Sign — aries Height — 5′6″ or 5′7″ not entirely sure Hogwarts House — slytherin Ethnicity — caucassian Favorite Fruit — blueberries Favorite Season — spring Favorite Book(s) — perks of being a wallflower & yes please Favorite Flower — does lavender count? Favorite Scent — waterfall or forest smells  Favorite Color — green (but like an earthy/army green) Favorite Animal — dogs or polar bears Favorite Bands/Singers — probs hozier, ed sheeran, and ill always love 1d Average Sleep Hours — somewhere between 4 and 8.... so i guess 6 Favorite Fictional Character(s) — steve rogers, barry allen, lorelai gilmore, rey, nala Dream Trip — alaska to see the northern lights and go dog sleeding Blog Created — this one.... fuck march 2016 (guys ive had this blog for almost a year now wtf) Number of Followers — 2366 (i havent been making shit lately) What Made You Decide To Make a Tumblr — like in the beginning??? i have no fucking idea why 2010 nat made her first tumblr, but this one because i was spamming my aesthetic blog with star wars and x files so i made this blog and now a year later im chris evans trash ..