#its also because i REALLY love to bake so
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freezebobs · 2 days ago
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DBFZ Yamcha and Ten cookies...done!!!
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Soo I've been on a mission to recreate the Yamcha and Ten cookies from dragon ball fighterz because they're adorable...and they're finally real!! :'D process and info below! (kind of long lol)
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I saw someone share these screencaps from the game a while ago and as someone who never played DBFZ I was so charmed at how cute these things are. I wondered if anyone had ever made cookie cutters for them, did a quick search and didn't really find anything, so just kind of moved on.
A few months later I remembered them again and was like, man, I really would love to see these brought to life lol. And I searched again and actually found someone who made them!!... But they weren't selling them anymore. 😭💔
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^Reddit post from user ShadowLord898.
So in the next few days I went into the DBFZ game files, figured out how to navigate them and locate/open the proprietary file types (took...a lot of googling), and eventually found the cookie textures!!! Which I then painstakingly traced over to create vectors.
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I thought once I had the vectors, it would be easy to drop them into a 3D program and extrude them to make the cookie cutters. BOY WAS I WRONG!!! It's probably just my inexperience working with vectors in 3D programs, but I tried Blender, Fusion 360, and Tinkercad and had problems in each one before finally figuring out the right approach. (I really almost gave up 🤧 but I hadn't realized that your geometry/topology don't need to be perfect when 3D modeling for print as opposed to, like, something you plan to create a texture for.)
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Tinkercad and its extremely user friendly interface, plus SVG import functionality, saved me.
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Oh then I realized I forgot to reverse the design, which you have to do for a cookie cutter because of how they work. I thought I would need to flip all the vectors and re-import them, recreate the models... but thankfully there's a "flip" button in Tinkercad. Fixed.
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I sent the files over to my friend @.theprocrastinatingengineer on Instagram, who has a 3D printing service, and he was able to print them out for me!
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While I was waiting for them to ship I downloaded Cura ("slicer" program for preparing 3D files for print) just for fun. (I was really eager...)
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And here's when I finally got them!!!
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Despite choosing all the dimensions carefully, I was still surprised how dainty they were when I actually held them in my hand. I wasn't sure if they would work...
So I made the dough and everything, used some 5mm thick chopsticks as guides to roll out the dough to the thickness I wanted. I put plastic wrap over the dough to prevent the cutters from directly touching the dough due to food safety concerns. Here is my first attempt to use them:
After this my mindset quickly shifted from caring about food safety to "what's a little more plastic in my system?" / "I'm here for a good time, not a long time!!" / "welll the dough gets baked anyway so that kills the germs it should be fiiine" **I Do Not recommend others to be so careless... also important note: I was the only one eating these so I didn't have to worry about others' safety 🥴
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^The difference between using the cutters with and without the plastic wrap.
This first rolling out of the dough was actually a little too thick; in my design I hadn't accounted for the way the dough squishes up when you press the cutter into it. There wasn't enough vertical space at all, and the dough kept getting stuck in the cutter. It was a bad time!!! (didn't get a lot of photos of the failures here because my hands were covered in flour)
After lots of broken cookie cutouts, re-flouring the surface/cutters/rolling pin, and re-rolling the dough to be a bit thinner, I managed to get these out. I had to support Ten's head like a newborn when moving the dough onto the cookie sheet because the connection to the body was so delicate 😢
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AND HERE THEY ARE...fully baked and ready 🥹
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For the most part I was going to leave them undecorated like how they are in the game. But @.lamichicuenta made this really cute drawing of the cookies where Yamcha had chocolate decorations and Ten was a salty cracker, and I really wanted to try decorating some to resemble those!! Here are the photos of both versions of the cookies the next day once I was able to get some natural light for nicer pics.
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(I meant to poke some holes in Ten's cookie to look more like a cracker but I forgot about it until they were already baking.)
They tasted fine...yamcha was better thanks to the chocolate. 🤭
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If you read all this, thank you for following my cookie cutter journey... 😌🙏💖
Oh yeah and I made the vectors, 3D print files, and specs/info all available in a google drive folder here for anyone to use if they want! https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1hQ7uq3leYPK64pGgt3LhFw-70IZnkYzh?usp=drive_link
OH and one last thing, i ended up revising the 3D models to hopefully fix the issue of not enough vertical space. ...turns out I hit the maximum for photos and videos in this post, but you can see it on my twitter here! https://twitter.com/freezebobs/status/1875720926840680678
I didn't get to try these revised models, but they are the ones I put in the drive folder. 😊👍
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pastasilly · 2 years ago
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welcome home wips + doodle (and my oc, Patty Cake!!)
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nabaath-areng · 2 months ago
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Dinner was a huge success, my mom LOVED it. Finally I got to boss her around by telling her to sit down and let me spoil HER for once without her trying to help <3333
It was extra fun cause I cooked her the signature family dish she developed when we were little but that I've developed further on my own since I moved out, and seeing how much she loved it really warmed my heart.
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tommygotwrittenoff · 5 months ago
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buck and eddie would be the most insane PTA moms ever, actually. because eddie loves his son and being a bitch and buck loves bossing people around with a clipboard and being involved.
#eddie would absolutely have beef with one of the moms over something stupid like the bake sale banner colors or something#and would convince buck to join the planning/organizing commitee and buck would be all okay!!!! yay that sounds so fun!! :)!!#and buck would end up taking it Very Seriously and whenever eddie tries to tell him ideas for the bake sale buck would get all ah ah ah#as a member of the committee i cannot consider new ideas without consulting the other committee member#eddie always complains that hes just brain storming and needs to bounce ideas off of buck and buck would just be all rules are rules eddie#so eddie has to present his ideas to the pta like all the other parents and buck doesnt ever appear to treat his ideas any differently so#eddie always catches his eye after hes done and winks at him and buck just glares back at him with red ears and ofc buck (usually) ends up#voting in favor of eddie and buck scolds him after meetings because “its inappropriate to flirt to try and get my favor eddie”#“i already have your favor buck. and when you have a clipboard its really hard not to flirt.”#also you know buck would be all over the micromanaging#like “hi jill you wrote down on the spreadsheet that you were going to make four dozen brownies#NOT four dozen chocolate chip cookies. now we have more chocolate chip cookies than we'll be able to sell and not enough brownies.“#and eddie would love getting involved like “yeah jill WAY too many cookies. now the sale is ruined and the kids will never get their trip.”#“eddie why dont you go set up your booth? you shouldve already done that by now...”#“right....”#like eddie would love arguing with the moms about like which activity is more suitable for earth day or whatever#they would literally love it so much#me thinks
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imflyingfish · 2 months ago
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ive come to realise that one of my favourite things to draw of all timeis my friends. something about reliving good moments during bad times or something. but unfortunately this means that ive barely known my friends for a few weeks and now im ready to hit them with the heres what animal crossing villager or pokemon you are
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fragglez · 5 months ago
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every time I watch a war related movie and they play the reveille i get spooked i HATE that melody
#im not hurridly putting on my uniform and running out of a tent at 5 in the morning to go run 2 miles#boy scout camp? more like BOOT CAMP#also i was the troop leader so i had to get everyone else out of the tent and make sure they were presentable#and god forbid it took more than 5 minutes#we were six people in one of those old ass orange tents#its a two people tent !!#i do miss being a boy scout tho it was fun whenever it didnt feel like the military#i used to do scout competitions#got me a mational champion trophy in boy scout (lie we did not win#we totally fucked up the first aid test)#won knot tying tho 💪#ok im just talking now so if you're still reading this won't be short#we had to get a person as high up as possible#and all we got was like 4 long ass tree trunks?? like skinny long round tree things (i hate the english language idk)#and rope#and because i was the shortest i had to hold onto the top of one of the trunks#while the others pulled me like 8 meters into the air#scary as fuck considering i was like 5' back then#won tho 💪💪#i really loved being a scout#we were called boy scouts but it was gender neutral#we hated the girl scouts™ tho#all they did was bake cake and make friendship bracelets while we had to shit in the forest#also they were just really mean like wow#nobody knows how to insult like a girl scout#i loved being troop leader#i liked helping people and being a problem solver and having my troop come to me w problems was SO awesome#until this one time when a girl woke me up in the middle of the night crying#*scene set: like 3am in a tent in the forest*#“😢 i dreamt the scout leader stabbed your eyes out with a cheese cutter 😭😭😭😭” HELLO??? WHAT THE FUCK GOODNIGHT
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i need to stop forgetting things exist the fucking second they leave my field of vision. why is is impossible for two things to occupy my mind at once especially when im tired. like. i feel like a sim. i feel like actions are being canceled and i just. move on. and completely forget what i was doing moments before. i fucking hate it
#i feel like it’s getting worse too#like its always hasn’t been great but the past few weeks have been especially bad#why can’t i remember things!! why is my short term memory sucking ass!!!!!!#like if i don’t write/type things down i loose it#making me wanna rip my hair out what the fuck is going on!!!!!#gonna start playing those phone games that improve memory or whatever#it’s either that or going to my mom for an essential oil recommendation#i know it’s probably some undiagnosed shit but im also like. i can’t keep blaming whatever is wrong with my brain because its a problem with#/me/. ya know?? like. yeah it is something with my brain. obviously. but i need to take some sort of action to fix it. and i dont know what#that action is#besides the two options i said before#or carrying a fucking notebook around and writing down everything. which is stupid also and i know won’t last a week#problem is im gonna forget about any rule i come up with since as soon as im preoccupied with something else. i’ll forget the rule#i would need a hat with the reminder on paper tapped to the hat#so it’s always dangling in front of my eyes#i don’t know what else to do at this point!!!!#it’s making me so worried about going away for college. cause yeah i did really well at community. but if i have the deteriorating memory#of a goldfish who’s constantly banging its head against the glass. how am i gonna make it through university.#i love writing essays in the tags that no one will read <3#having a ball rn. a great time. not feeling like a waste of resources at all rn. feeling great.#if my mom doesn’t let me wear my earbuds tomorrow i think ill scream#anyways. gonna bake some blueberry lemon sweet rolls tomorrow#me rambling#i love being undiagnosed#but let’s be real#being diagnosed won’t give me anything other than more of an excuse#because i can’t go on meds with my current living situation#and i also don’t really want to go on meds because i don’t trust them#feeling silly i think ill actually post this one maybe someone has a suggestion for what to do#vent
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While we're here, I just want to add an example of a good response to Harris' video.
In the first half of the video, Harris briefly mentions a creator called Lukeypoo (who now goes by Luke Stephens) who had plagiarised Harris' Bloodborne review, and his response at the time was to deny it, signal to his alt right buddies and insult Harris.
After the video came out, Luke Stephens made a post on his community page regarding it:
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For those, who can't see the screenshots, it reads:
A video went up on YouTube last night that showed something I did 6 years ago in early 2017, of which I'm very ashamed. I've talked about it on stream plenty since then and try to be very open about it, but I know a lot of people haven't been watching me since 2017 or have not heard me discuss this before. I don't want to hide from my mistakes or deflect, so very plainly here's what happened:
I was just starting on YouTube and I ripped off a phenomenal video on Bloodborne. It was a fantastic video by hbomberguy and after finding it through a Reddit post I tried to take his 1.5 hour masterpiece and make my own suckier version at around 7 minutes. I copied the premise, jokes, structure, and then pretended like it was all just a coincidence that they were so similar. I was a 19 year old idiot who thought it didn't matter because "he's a bigger creator so it's fine" and "it's just the internet." When I was rightly called out for copying his video I dodged, lied, and even attacked and insulted the appearance of those holding me to account, including hbomberguy himself. I copied someone's video, in parts word-for-word, and I pretended like *I* was the victim and *they* were being unreasonable. Unbelievable. There is no question at all: I was in the wrong, fully.
Let me be very clear: I whole heartedly disown who I was back then and what I did. Politically, religiously, and even morally/ethically I was a person that I hate today. I was an extremist, a bully, a religious zealot, and above all, a prick. This event sparked a spiral in my personal life that I didn't document online, but that has led me to who I am today. Someone who tries very hard to respect my fellow creators, audience, and to uphold a high ethical standard for myself. I strive every day to be a better man for myself, my family and kids, and for the community around me. And that's why I'm writing this, because I don't think we should hide from our mistakes or pretend they didn't happen. I screwed up, big time, and I stole the hard work of an incredibly talented creator and for that I'm incredibly sorry. I was 19, hard headed, and above all arrogant and unwilling to acknowledge I had screwed up. It took a couple years after that before I could openly admit what I had actually done, and that it took that long is all the more shameful.
I don't expect a response or certainly forgiveness, but for what it's worth, I am truly sorry for everything, @hbomberguy
For the last 6 years I've been working my butt off to be someone I can be proud of being and I hope you all can see that the man I am today is not the shameful excuse of a person I was back then.
I've never watched a video or stream by Luke Stephens so I can't attest as to his content, but this is one of the best responses I've seen to any kind of accusation, and so I lean towards believing him to be a better man than he was six years.
I thinks it's important to highlight the good response/s to Harris' video, to remind ourselves that plagiarism is not such an immoral action that from which you can't redeem yourself (though in Somerton's case, I'm less sure of that) if you take accountability for your actions, and to remember that in most cases, we should give people space to grow and become better.
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The swiftness and brutality of Hbomberguy’s complete evisceration of James Somerton’s career cannot be overstated.
#i saw this a few days ago and its stayed on my mind#and i havent seen many other people talk about it so i thought i would#also this is unrelated by im not gonna ever put this in an actual post so im going to use these tags to get it off my chest#i rewatched the video yesterday and it aas during harris' speech about how art is difficult and a skill#that i kinda had an epiphany i guess#(have not used that word in a while huh)#because thrice within the last few years#ive come across fics on ao3 where while i wouldnt call it plagiarism the authors did very much steal a considerable amount from my fics#some less than others#one of them used some of the exact same sentences as mine so i guess that one was plagiarism#but they all took a nontrivial amount of ideas or plotbeats or phrasings from my fics#and each time i was in three minds: 1) i found it kinda funny honestly though i cant articulate why; 2) i was flattered because i dont#really think my fics are worth stealing from; and 3) holy shit i baked one of the holy shit two cakes#i wasnt really upset by it especially because i know my work has been inspired by fics i love at times#but after rewatching harris' video#i realised it wasnt that i wasnt upset but that i wasnt allowing myself to be#because i didnt consider my work as something you could steal from? i didnt consider it worthy of that#like not as in ''oh i didnt know my art was that good'' but as in ''oh i didnt know my work was art''#so ive been allowing myself to be upset about it since then#and all those emotions are probably tangled up in the roots of the treehouse luke stephens' response is squatting in#because like#im not going to do anything about it like im not going to accuse the authors of plagiarism#even the one who stole exact sentences mostly because their writing is indicative of a 13 year old and mate im 23#ive been writing since i was 11. i know what its like to be starting out as a newbie writer it just feels mean for me to call them out#and if theyve stolen lines from me theyre going to have done it to other people and im sure theres someone else who feels more comfortable#in approaching them about it#but anyway back to my point#im not going after any of these people in anyway but if i did id want their response to be like this
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i like thinking about Geto being quietly obsessed with grieving Riko. He thinks about her constantly and refuses to ever forget her, but he also refuses to talk about her. He has the selfish impulse that he's the only one who's truly allowed to grieve her because he was there when she died, he was the one who failed her. And I think he hates that he has that impulse because it's selfish, because Gojo failed her just as much as him, and Kuroi was her family and Riko meant so much more to her, but that isn't enough to stop him from feeling like he's the most deserving of the guilt and grief. And I think he can't ever truly see Mimiko and Nanako as their own people- he sees them as proof of his worldview, they are the reasons for his beliefs made human, but also. They're a chance at redemption. Theyre a chance to go home
#I'm going to claw out my eyes. Don't get me started on how much Mimiko and Nanako worship him#Which like. Understandable even if he doesn't deserve it- he saved them and he's fucking. Everything to them#But I just know their relationship is defined by the holes in his heart that they can't fill#Because they shouldn't have to. They should be allowed to be their own people. He should love them for who they are as themselves#But he just tries to cover up the holes that watching Riko die and cutting Satoru off left in him#And it makes me sooooo sick. This guy SUCKS so baddddddd I love it#Messy nasty selfish grief that ends up being warped to the point it's a disservice to the memory of the person being grieved#I could probably also talk about how I feel like there's an undercurrent of misogyny to it. As in I think Geto really idealizes masculinity#As like. A protector role in a way that doesn't truly respect women as people but rather as the vague idea of something to be protected#And he doesn't really. Work to form the emotional bonds that would be there in a respectful relationship. But he still forms natural#Emotional bonds as a consequence of just y'know. Being human and being with people- he just doesn't cultivate and respect those bonds in a#Way thats respectful of the women around him. And this is part of why I think Geto being transmasc is really fuckin good#Because it's the sense of idealizing a theoretically 'good' type of masculinity that still fucking actually sucks bc its a social construct#Created in a society that doesn't value/respect women and that devaluation/disrespect is baked into the idea of ''normal'' in a way#That takes actual work to like. Acknowledge and unlearn so that you aren't just a misogynist but Outwardly Nice about it#And idk exploring that with a trans man is really interesting to me in the sense of these things being learned rather than There From Birth#And I think it also can worsen the Misogyny issue because theres often the need to distance yourself from femininity/women as a trans man#To prove (to yourself or others) that you are truly A Man and that can lead to a reluctance to acknowledge the relationship you have to#Women and girls around you in a social sense which leads you to sorta default disregard them or end up less exposed to them as#Fully fleshed out people rather than vague figures who Exist and are Different in ways. Which leads to the misogyny that society gives you#Going unchecked in a way that can be either subtle and insidious or jus straight up obvious and gross#Anyway Geto has a bunch of complexes and needs to. Idk what he needs maybe he should play disco elysium#I highly doubt it would fix him but I think it would be really interesting to see what it does to him
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flowergardeninthewall · 6 months ago
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I think it's a good sign if the recipie your planning on doing for the next day includes busting the food processor out the night before to marinate meat overnight
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simple-and-cozy-life · 9 months ago
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I know I'm always going to be busy, but I cannot wait until I can either just come home to a family, even if it's just my future husband and I and enjoy our time together, or stay at home and make our place a home worth living in.
Even with private violin/viola/cello/bass lessons that will most likely take place at my house, I am really looking forward to the solace of somewhere I can call home with a family.
Hopefully this will be my last big adventure before I settle down and marry the love of my life.
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neonacidtrip · 1 year ago
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[text ID: Black image with purple text showing the tags from Tumblr user lyriumrain. The tags read as follows: #i’ve been thinking a lot about how you really can just tell whatever story you want #there are components that your story *can* include if you want to #but you don’t have to #there’s a billion trillion stories out there #might as well tell the one you want to tell how you want to tell it. End ID]
Every 21st century piece of writing advice: Make us CARE about the character from page 1! Make us empathize with them! Make them interesting and different but still relatable and likable!
Every piece of classic literature: Hi. It's me. The bland everyman whose only purpose is to tell you this story. I have no actual personality. Here's the story of the time I encountered the worst people I ever met in my life. But first, ten pages of description about the place in which I met them.
#reading this post the first thing to come to mind was wuthering heights#the main characters arrives gets so angry he has a nose bleed and spend like two weeks in bed#he was so forgettable that i forgot he existed and with it i forgot the entire setup of the story#for those who dont know a story from the past is being told to him by the maid while he recovers in bed#it cuts to him occasionally for his input buts its quite rare and doesnt really happen much until the second half#i should reread wuthering heights i think id enjoy it much more if i read it as a comedy#i should also mention that i read it back around the same time i started watching anime. and i started with older anime obviously#like ouran high school host club and fairy tale and soul eater. things with ridiculous nose bleeds#so to crack open a literary classic and the main character immediately getting a nose bleed. i laughed my head off#i still havent finished crime and punishment (i am a cringefail girl sorry) but i love it so much because#the main character is also so very cringefail. hes a nasty stinky boy the wettest of unhatched men#like his views on depression and the way change can restructure our entire lives is poetic mastery dont get me wrong#but only in crime and punishment do you get statements like 'stop you queer fish' and 'if you were a baked onion id buy two of you'#i got that second quote wrong but shhhhh let me have this#but honestly part of why i love fanfic and have started preferring it over regular books is exactly for this reason#you dont have to follow the rules of regular modern writing. you dont have to have a beginning end and climax#you dont have to end on a happy note. you dont have to redeem your main characters foul actions#it can just be sex or just be pain or just be love and theres no need to justify your decisions on it#you really can tell the story EXACTLY as you want to tell it without any filler. and likewise you can read it the same way#its like rereading your favorite part of a book that you lovingly dogearred and getting to ignore the rest of the book again and again <3#gosh i should get back into reading classic literature and finally finishing macbeth and crime and punishment#they really bring me such joy. my brain is just anti-book-dopamine at the moment#writing#classic literature#charles dickens#as always i am brand new to adding id text captions please be gentle with me
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beloveds-embrace · 1 month ago
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Part two of the Lavender Marriage au! Considered adding smut to this but I chickened out lmao if the ending is abrupt it’s because of that 🙂‍↕️
The four men are fuming.
Since witnessing the lip-lock battle, they’ve been stewing in barely-contained anger. Every time they see you- on your porch in one of those sweet sundresses, humming to yourself as you water the flower boxes or hand them freshly-baked cookies- they’re consumed by a burning desire to tell you the “truth” about your cheating husband. But the ring on your finger, and your seemingly cheerful demeanor, stop them every time.
Still, they’re restless. It’s wrong to let you live in ignorance like this. But also, it’s not their business even if they want it- even if they want you. The thought of ruining your cozy life, despite your husband’s unfaithfulness, isn’t an easy one to swallow.
It becomes easier to think of admitting it all to you with each passing day, though.
“He’s walking around like he’s done nothing wrong! The bastard. How does she not see it?” Kyle grumbles, gesturing wildly with his tea mug. He grits his teeth, watching your husband saunter inside the house without offering to help you. He just puts down a plate of steak Kyle knows is too fucking cooked. Heathen. Bastard. Ughhh.
“She’s either blind or loyal to a fault,” Johnny agrees, sprawled out on the couch, looking far more despondent than usual. “Breaks ma bloody heart, lads. She’s makin’ us lemonade an’ cookies, an’ he’s aff canoodlin’ wiith some bloke under her roof.”
Simon grunts, his eyes narrowing as he joins Kyle’s side. “What kind of man cheats on her? She’s…” He trails off, unwilling to finish the sentence, but everyone knows what he means: She’s perfect.
Meanwhile, John leans back in his chair, puffing thoughtfully on a cigar. He’s been unusually quiet, though it’s clear he’s just as agitated, fist clenching on his lap. Finally, he speaks, his tone commanding.
“We wait until he leaves,” he says, much to the others’ dismay. “We don’t meddle now. If she finds out on her own, we’ll be there for her. Until then, we keep our mouths shut.”
The others grumble, but they nod in agreement. For now.
You, meanwhile, are oblivious to the internal warfare raging next door. Your days are filled with your usual routine of pretending to be the dutiful wife, gossiping with the neighborhood ladies, sweetly cooing about your hardworking husband, and pretending you don’t know they will gosspi about you after you leave. On the way, you also deliver a basket of homemade muffins to your handsome neighbors.
Such good men; they didn’t even yet know they were your little kitchen rats to taste-test everything you make for the annual baking contest. This year, that bitch Beatrice will not win and you swore it.
“Oh, these look incredible,” Johnny says when you hand over the basket. He flashes you a cheeky grin, and you can’t help but smile back, cheeks warm. “Y’know, if yer husband does not appreciate all this, I might just have ta steal ye away, lass.”
You laugh, waving off the comment as a joke, but the other three men go rigid. “Not the time, mate.” Kyle mutters, elbowing Johnny, though you really don’t notice. Their house is coming along so nicely and so fast; the perks of having handy men as its owners, you suppose.
Later that day, while you’re trimming the hedges of your precious little garden , you spot Simon working on their roof. You catch him staring at you- not that you blame him, you are wearing your one of cutest skirt and top- and you give him a small wave. He almost falls off the roof even if he does wave back, so you decide to just focus on the damned hedges and hopefully avoid any more incidents.
They’re so distracted by your lovely self that they almost forget their rage toward your husband. Almost. Because just as Price and Johnny are helping you carry bags of groceries back to your house, your husband- traitorous bastard- walks out of the house all patient and whistling.
“Be back soon, honey! You know how long my business trips take.” your husband calls over his shoulder, giving you a quick wink before he hops into a car and drives off.
Unbelievable.
The tension is palpable. John glares. Johnny looks like he’s seconds from sprinting after the car. Simon mutters, “Unbelievable,” under his breath from where he and Kyle are watching from the window.
“Oh dear,” you sigh, though on the inside you are very happy. You know your husband’s boyfriend has a nice surprise picked for him- you helped get it, after all- and now you have the house all to yourself again. Perfect.
You turn to John, batting your lashes up at him and it is as if all his anger melts away. “Be my guests this evening, John? I’d be terribly lonely, all by myself in this big house.”
John really, truly, fucking hates your husband for doing this to a precious, lovely thing like you. But at least it means they’ll be the ones in your company.
“Alright, doll,” he nods, fond as he watches the grin stretch across your face. “Let me just go tell the muppets, then we’ll come by and help.”
“There’s no need-“
“I insist, sweetheart.”
That evening, as promised, the four of them come by to “keep you company” and help. You’re in your element, flitting around the kitchen in an apron as you serve drinks and chatter away, oblivious to the tension radiating from the group. You are practically glowing; your pretty flowers were complimented and the food looks so good you can’t wait to post it on your instagram.
Simon leans against the counter, arms crossed, staring daggers into the walls- into the portraits of you and your husband. Kyle is poking at one of the cookies you made like it’s done something to offend him, his mind adrift. Johnny’s chopping away at vegetables, muttering under his breath and wishing it was something else under his knife. And John? He’s nursing his whiskey like it’s the only thing keeping him sane. It might as well be. You talk so nicely about your husband and what he’s customized for you in the kitchen, still so unaware of the truth.
John contemplates just telling you right then and there, but then it happens.
The front door swings open, and in strolls your husband, laughing loudly with none other than his boyfriend- the one the group saw kissing. They’re holding hands, both grinning like idiots.
“Sorry we’re back so soon!” your husband calls out, completely unbothered by the fact that your house is now hosting four very large, very angry military men. “I forgot my wallet-”
The rest of his sentence dies in his throat when he notices the four men staring at him, expressions ranging from pure disbelief to murderous rage. His boyfriend freezes too, glancing nervously between you and the men like he’s walked into a firing squad.
“What the bloody hell is this?” Johnny practically shouts, pointing between the two men with the knife. “You’ve got the audacity to bring him here? Here?”
Kyle crushes the cookie when he slams his fist on the table, standing abruptly. “Under her roof? After all she’s done for you? Again?”
Simon doesn’t say a word because he truly doesn’t need to- he’s just staring, fists clenched, practically vibrating with barely-contained fury.
John finally speaks, his voice low and dangerous, pulling your surprised self against his side protectively. “You’ve got some confessing to do.”
Your husband just… blinks, then glances at you. “Wait, you didn’t tell them?”
You sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose. “I didn’t think it would come up like this.”
“Tell us what?” John demands, his tone sharp. He is still glaring at your husband and the boyfriend
You wave your hand dismissively, like this is the most normal thing in the world with a soft sigh. “Oh, we’re not really married for love, John. It’s just for the benefits- y’know, keeping his parents off his back and mine off mine.”
The room falls silent. Dead silent.
“What?” Simon finally growls, his voice low and dangerous. All this time…
Your husband grins sheepishly, wrapping an arm around his boyfriend’s shoulders. “Yeah, I’m gay. This is my boyfriend. He’s great, isn’t he?” He says, kissing his boyfriend’s cheek.
Johnny looks like he’s just been hit with the frying pan the vegetables he’d been chopping was meant to go in. “Yer what?”
Kyle stares at you, wide-eyed. “You knew? This whole time?”
You shrug, popping a cookie into your mouth. Ohh, Beatrice should count her fucking days. “Of course I knew. We planned the whole thing together. It’s not that complicated, really.”
Simon mutters something under his breath that sounds suspiciously like a curse.
“Anyways, we do have places to be,” your husband sighs. “I’ll just get my wallet and leave you all be to your date.” When he returns with his wallet a few minutes later, he kisses your forehead. “Bye, love. I snuck some of the cookies too- Beatrice is absolutely not winning this year, trust me.” And then he leaves at last.
John exhales sharply, rubbing a hand over his face. “Let me get this straight,” he says slowly. “You’re married but it’s just… out of necessity, and you’ve just been… pretending to love him?”
“Exactly!” you say brightly, clapping your hands together. “See? Not so hard to understand.”
The four men just stand there, utterly gobsmacked.
“You mean to tell me,” Johnny starts, pointing an accusatory finger at you after placing the knife down. “that we’ve been stewin’ for weeks over a cheatin’ husband that doesn’t even exist?”
“Pretty much, yeah,” you reply with a giggle, pouring a drink. Your eyes widen then. “But you cannot tell anyone here, in this shitty town, about this!”
“We won’t, love, promise.” Kyle groans, slumping back into his chair. “I need a bloody drink.” And then he perks up when you slide him the drink you just made. “…fucking lifesaver you are, love. Thank you.”
Simon just shakes his head, muttering, “Unbelievable.” under his breath.
John sighs, downing the rest of his whiskey in one go. “You’re going to be the death of us, doll.”
You grin, completely unfazed. “Oh, come on, boys. It’s not that bad.”
The four of them exchange a look- one of disbelief, exasperation, and maybe just a hint of relief. Because as much as they’re reeling from the truth, one thing’s clear: you’re technically single. And that, at least, is something they can work with.
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butchvampireheimerdinger · 1 month ago
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can we get butchfemme sevika/reader hcs please :3
GAWD yes. Lord, I've been waiting for this day lessgo
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ButchFemme Sevika/Reader Headcanons
⚢ In typical butch fashion, her love language is acts of service
⚢ Loves to be fawned over ! Like “Omfg babe you’re sooo strong helping me put together furniture” and trust she is melting even though her face is expressionless and immoveable
⚢ She likes when you graze your long nails over her skin for back scratches and its all nice and light and tingly
⚢ She’s not much of a prettyboy (prettybutch…?) so she doesn’t really have a skincare routine but you have an extensive regimen so she memorizes all ur million little bougie products and gets you an extra to keep at ur place so you don’t have to eff up your skincare routine in favor of spontaneous sleepovers
⚢ Yeah she’s not too particular about her grooming in general. She lets you cut her hair even if you’re not super experienced with clippers. She still hypes you up even if you nick her ear when doing up her side shave/undercut.
“Oops! Sorry babe I think I got your ear…”
“Didn’t even feel it. You’re doing great baby keep going.”
⚢ On that note, pet names: For Sevika, its baby alll dayyyyyy ! She calls you baby, my girl, my pretty girl, my woman, etc. And as for what you call her, she always loves a “omg babe” moment. And “settle down there, cowboy” but in like a jesting sorta way. Also: “my butch.”
⚢ Stone top/pillow princess anybody?
⚢ Also: she’s ur cash cow. She loves buying you expensive shit and showing you off and showing off the expensive shit. You breathed in the direction of a particularly nice perfume? Surprise! It’s in your bathroom the following day. Like. It’s a theme. Especially in ur pre-relationship courting era. “Baby anything you want I get for you. Say the word I’ll buy for you the moon, the stars, et cetera, no one can provide for you like I can” blah blah blah
⚢ But you can’t be interrupting her card games tho. She’s like a teenage boy on the xbox with those things. Probs something to be worried about tbh.
⚢ And I’ve written this into a fanfic already, but that bitch wears boyshorts. I was thinking boxers for a while but I think that would be too much bulk over them skinny little plants she wears. I am a Sevika boyshorts TRUTHER
⚢ And she works out. Matter of fact, forget the prettybutch comment because Sevika WORKS OUTTT and I think she has resistance bands. Like she goes to an actual gym but around the house you’ll find her repping with those damn resistance bands to relieve stress or just cause she sees them and remembers.
⚢ And she works out to like. Classical music. Cause she’s a classy mothafuckaaa just absolutely getting ripped and her face is in a scary ass sneer but there's like ode to joy in the background
⚢ You pack her lunch. She gets flamed at work cause her paper bag is covered in lil hearts and stickers and kissy lipstick marks and its filled with sugary baked goods like pink sparkly cupcakes and fruity pastries cause u can’t cook. But by gawd u can bake.
⚢ That being said, she’s the cook in the relationship. Especially when it comes to meat. It’s problematic. Sevika’s version of “girl dinner” is straight up protein. Her typical meal is like. A rotisserie chicken + hard boiled eggs. It made you gasp the first time you saw her pull out one of her meal prep tins and it was just that.
⚢ Oh yeah and she meal preps
⚢ Claims she “doesn’t get sick” because her “immune system is just built different.”
⚢ When she does get sick, she refuses to chill out and let herself be sick and she tries to speedrun her way to health by taking too much vitamin C and then working out and cranking the heat to “sweat it out quicker.”
⚢ She knits to relieve stress
⚢ Sleeps topless and in undies. And a wife pleaser tank if its chilly.
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tbaluver · 5 months ago
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When You're On Your Period- The Love And DeepSpace Men
parings in order: Xavier x Reader, Zayne x Reader, Rafayel x Reader, Sylus x Reader genre: fluff, comfort a/n: posting my drafts atm bc i just have writers block sorrys /ᐠ - ˕ -マ
any likes and reblogs are always appreciated! enjoy!
⋆。‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧。⋆
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Xavier:
He's not particularly educated in the realm of menstruation. So when he saw you clutching your sides in agony, he was so worried about you and ran to your side. He thought you were sick or injured. You try to explain to him that you're just on your period and he eagerly listens to you as you explain it to him.
It's his mission to try and make everything easy for you and makes a special effort to bring you things that might make you feel a little better.
"Can you buy me pads with/out wings?" And he would be really confused at first. He would think you want pads and wings. He would stand in the aisle for a while figuring out which ones you needed. So he'll come back home with a BUNCH of menstrual products with wings from your favorite restaurant.
But also the type to buy you your favorite snacks and drinks before you even ask. Sometimes he'll come home with a small plushie for some support.
Lowkey worried if you're going to be alright but he knows you're strong and will remind himself that you know how to handle yourself.
He would gently massage any areas that were aching. Lots of your time is spent in his arms or resting your head on his chest and he explains that the health website says its "beneficial" to do so and you're not complaining. He's so comfy.
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Zayne:
In the beginning of your relationship, he was kind of inexperienced in this department. He knew some knowledge about the menstrual cycle but not too much so he made sure to educate himself so he knows how to take better care of you.
He runs down to the pharmacy to get you some pain medication and any menstrual products you need without any ounce of embarrassment. He doesn't find a reason to feel ashamed or embarrassed about getting you things for your period. Makes sure you have enough supplies to last you the whole week.
Prepares you some yummy warm foods that are nutritious for you and all cooked to your liking. He would also make sure to run down to your favorite bakery to pick you up some baked goods.
If you suffer from cramps, then he would find the best pill for you or make you effective tea. He'll also offer any massages you want on your body and let's just say this man is good with his hands that you don't want his hands off of you.
The type to not tell you that you stained the bed. He'll prepare you a soothing bath while he washes the sheets. When you come back the bed is nice and warm.
He'll start marking it down on his calendar so he can be prepared more in the future
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Rafayel:
He would kind of forget periods are a thing but once you remind him, he'll try his best to take care of you. He has good intentions looking out for you and getting whatever you need. You would text him if he can get something for you and he's already on his way to you with whatever you requested.
He'll pay attention to your specific needs and preferences. He'll make sure you're getting your rest, staying hydrated, and eating well.
Would joke around and call this "Shark week." Would pray to any gods to bring mercy on him if he were to ever to be sassy to you on your period.
He'll be worried about you but he knows that you're strong. That doesn't mean he'll leave you alone during this time, unless you want him too. He'll be there to try and ease everything as much as he could.
If you were to have any bad cramps, he would give your lower abdomen a small massage while talking too it. "Hey don't be so mean to my cutie....." or sometimes he'll tell you some stories about Lemuria or maybe hum you a song in Lemurian to get your mind off it. Your head would be resting on his chest, his hands massaging gently into your aching sides.
It's easy to fall asleep in his arms because he can be so warm from his evol
He'll offer to make you a bath and gather your favorite bath bombs and your oils that might ease your discomfort. He would have the perfect temperature for you and would help undress you and help you into the bathtub. Would also feed you some yummy fruits like a princess while you were in the bath
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Sylus:
Sylus treats you like royalty the entire time you're on your period. He's extra patient and understanding. You don't have to feel embarrassed at all with him and he will never be disgusted by you being on your period.
If you ever stained the bed, he would clean it up for you. He would reassure you that everything is okay and that bleeding is normal. He'll help run a bath for you while he cleans the sheets. He would never use these situations against you or even embarrass you about it.
He's always there to give you a massage knowing how bad cramps can be. Tell him where it hurts and he'll immediately massage the area with his hands. If massages weren't helping, then he'll warm up a heating pad for you and would find the best painkillers to make it go away.
The first time you were on your period, he bought way to many products for you so you were stocked up. Eventually in the future he knows the exact brand and everything you could possibly need.
When you wake up, he already has a meal prepared for you. Sometimes it'll be made from a private chef or he made it on his own. He'll gladly carry you to the kitchen so he can feed it to you or if you want, you can eat in bed.
Would give you random and frequent kisses. He knows that during this time you can go through a lot of emotions so he'll make sure to give you kisses to remind you that he loves and cares about you.
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bookshelf-dust · 6 months ago
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kiss him with chocolate lips
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billy hargrove x fem!reader
gif by @biillys
word count: 1,837
warnings: swearing, some sexual references/themes, allusions to sexy adult things, play-fighting, reader and billy being in love and that love language is being little shits to each other (also acts of service), smooching and one use of the word saliva
synopsis: you decide to bake cookies, and billy decides he must be included, but you’d never let your cookies perish in return for an insatiable man.
a/n: hii!! i came up with a few lines of dialogue for billy a little bit ago, and then they just sat in my notes app because i couldn’t think of what to do with them. halfway through writing this, something i wanted to be sweet and silly, i felt lost and didn’t know how to end it or where to go with it, and started looking for inspiration. but then it came to me! and i’m very happy with how this turned out. i hope you like it! happy reading <33
————
Your hands are buried wrist deep in cookie dough, because you got sick of the shitty spatula not doing its job. 
You keep folding it in and over itself, trying to get all the chocolate chips and dry ingredients properly combined. You feel like the cookies just don’t turn out right if you don’t get in there and make sure it’s the way it’s meant to be. 
You reach over and grab a handful of mini chips to toss in your mouth. You have this mixture of regular size ones, minis, and chunks that you swear by. 
“You missed the bowl.”
A pair of large, warm hands slide over your waist, pinkies grazing over that spot where your pelvis dips because they know that’s your ticklish spot and just want to see you squirm. 
“Fuck off, prick.”
Billy smiles into the soft and slightly sweaty skin of your neck, peppering kisses in a trail from your collarbone to your earlobe. You nudge him with your shoulder, trying to ward him off. 
He licks a stripe up the back of your neck. And if you weren’t making an effort to look annoyed by his presence, your eyes might’ve just rolled back into your head. 
Instead you let out a sort of strangled howl to emphasize your agony. You are busy, after all. Making cookies you know he’ll eat before you can have any for yourself. You’ll have to hide some this time. 
You elbow Billy in the stomach, but his hands never leave your hips. He’s chuckling lightly, enjoying every minute of teasing you and being the biggest nuisance he can be.
“I should castrate you,” you say, rubbing your nose with your forearm to avoid spreading cookie dough all over your face. 
Billy laughs into your neck, the tip of his nose cold against your warm skin. “Oh, but you like that part of me too much, baby.”
You scoff. “Dick.”
He places a finger on your chin so that you’ll meet his gaze. “Exactly.” 
“I hate you,” you say, your eyes boring into his and saying anything but. They’re practically twinkling just looking at him. 
He hooks another finger under your chin and coaxes you closer, “I know,” he smiles, pressing his lips to yours in a kiss that tastes like chocolate chips. 
The flavor being on his mouth makes you pull away in shock. You put your hands on your hips and feign being absolutely appalled and ashamed.
“You come in here, on my ass, when yours has been fillin’ up on chocolate for how long?” You raise up on your tippy toes, trying your best to get in his face. He bends slightly to make it easier for you. 
His gaze drags over each of your pretty features in that way he knows gives you goosebumps. “You think you just get to eat ‘em all or something?”
You press your hand to his chest. “I bought the damn things, Hargrove. And I think, as the woman making the cookies, I’m entitled to eat as many chocolate chips as I want.” 
Billy leans in again and kisses you, but this time it’s slow, too slow, and sensual. The kind that feels like it lasts forever but in reality was a few seconds. One that really should last forever. It makes your brain go all fuzzy.
He drags his hand up your spine and pulls back. “Yes, ma’am.” 
Your stomach flips, your blood rushing to all the important parts of your body because he knows just what buttons to push and you despise him for it. Cocky little shit. 
“Now look who can use his manners,” you say, your voice taking on a sing-songy lilt. Billy grins at you, biting his lip, and then returns to his place behind you. 
You both settle down, quieting and melting into each other's presence. Billy watches over your shoulder as you pour in more chocolate chips. He knows you always hate it when people cheat you out of your chocolate. 
“I need a tray, B, can you get one for me?”
He pats your ass and moves to the designated cabinet without answering. He rips out a sheet of parchment paper without you having to ask. You always say that the bottoms don’t burn as easily that way, or you quote something from a cooking show you watched on tv that morning. 
He brings the cookie sheet back to you and then pushes up so he’s sitting on the counter next to you, bare thighs pressing into the cold stone. 
You pass him the rest of the chocolate chips to snack on and bend to kiss his knee. He blushes. You’ve been together for a few years now, but each time you give him affection in small, uncommon ways, it makes him feel like teenage boy. 
Billy watches you separate the dough into even-ish chunks before sliding it all into the oven. He tilts his head back and tosses the rest of the chocolate chips into his mouth before hopping down from the counter. 
He grabs your hips when he sees you move toward the sink. “Uh, uh. Go sit, mama. I’ll take care of it.” He knows you’re going to push back, and before you can he picks you up and places you in the living room. 
You let out a small huff and walk right back to your starting point. There aren’t even that many dishes to wash anyway, but what’s the fun in cooperating with him?
“Billy.”
“Hm?” He’s squeezing soap all over the dishes you’d already pre-rinsed. 
“Go sit your pretty ass down and let me do this.” You hear him laugh over the sound of the tap running and roll your eyes. He feels it. And he ignores you, squeezing out a sponge. 
You wrap your arms around his waist and pull, trying to lift him up the way he had with you just moments before. You manage to heave him up just enough that his toes leave the tile and he cackles at your effort to be such an adorable irritant.
He looks at you over his shoulder, your brow creased in concentration, the tip of your tongue sticking out just slightly. “How’s that workin’ out for ya, princess?”
“It’s not my fault you’re so big and heavy and strong.”
His ego practically skyrockets, his brain picking out any bit of flattery you’ll offer him. 
“Big and strong, huh?”
You cross your arms and spin around, hiding your wide smile before he can catch a glimpse at it. At how pleased you are to have riled him up. You let out a little petulant “Hmph!” and start to pad away. You know what’s coming though, and you try to pick up speed before you can be captured. 
Billy’s arms are around your thighs in seconds. He’s managed to turn you around and lift you up, throwing you over your shoulder like it’s nothing, like this is a normal daily task. “I’ll show you big and strong, pretty baby.”
You beat playfully on his lower back, fighting off a fit of giggles. “Billy! Put me down motherfucker!” He’s laughing too, all too pleased with himself for being able to get you like this. 
He pulls you down so you’re hanging onto his front and starts maneuvering you onto the couch. Your every nerve ending lights up when you feel Billy’s hand at the crown of your head, cradling you as he sets you down. 
The gentle manner in which he handles you does not correlate to the way he kisses you. 
Billy settles between your legs, grabbing your arms and coaxing them around his neck. He’s giving you a job, giving you instructions, and it makes your brain go quiet. Honing in on him, and nothing else. He’s all you can see, all you can smell, all you’re capable of thinking about. 
One of his hands slips beneath your t-shirt and settles against the dip of your spine, allowing him to pull you upward, allowing him to mold your body to his without you even having to put in the effort to arch your back and meet him. 
The other slips into the hair at the base of your neck, fingernails scratching over your scalp to get the goosebumps going, the heel of his hand rubbing determinedly at your skin, massaging it and reveling in the heat radiating off of you. 
Each time you try to say something, Billy kisses you harder, laughing into your mouth. He’s getting sloppy, losing himself in the taste of chocolate and lip balm and you. 
He sucks on your bottom lip, nips at it with his teeth, and it makes you let out a small, quiet moan. Billy slaps your thigh and you pull his hair. He groans, loud and unashamed. He shoves his knee in between your legs, meets the hottest, softest part of you and—
The timer on the microwave goes off.
Your cookies are finished. 
You pull back from Billy’s warm mouth, because you can’t let your cookies burn. What kind of monster would you be, letting cookies perish for a man? Absolutely not. 
His lips are still in a pout and there’s a string of saliva connecting the both of you. 
Instead of laughing like you want, you groan, “Oh dear Christ, ew, Billy.”
While he’s processing that you just said “ew” to him, you slide out from underneath his arms and race to pull the finished cookies from the oven. 
You’re carefully picking each cookie up and setting them on a cooling rack so they’ll become edible—without burning the skin off the roof of your mouth—sooner rather than later. 
Billy finally appears in the kitchen and puts a hand against the counter. His brow creases like he’s just been told something very serious, though his mussed hair and flushed cheeks say otherwise. 
“Did you just say ew to me, baby?” An evil smirk starts to appear on his face and he closes in on you. “You definitely don’t think it’s gross when I spit on your—” 
You shove a warm cookie into his mouth before he can finish that sentence. His face takes on a comical expression of his surprise, but he happily chews on the melting chocolate chips you’ve provided him with. He does like the warm cookies the best. 
You reach for a towel to clean off his face, but he moves too fast. 
Billy is kissing you all over, your neck, your collarbones, your cheeks and forehead. He’s doing his damndest to get chocolate all over you as payback for your teasing little attitude. 
“Billy!” you squeal, giggling and shrieking with joy. 
“Take it back! Take back that fucking ew, princess, and you can go!” He’s cackling, tickling your sides. 
“Okay, okay! I love your nasty ass, I do! Let me go!”
He removes his fingers from your hips and starts to wipe off your face with a wet cloth while you both catch your breath. 
“Damn right you do.”
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tagging: @clovermunson (i got you bestie)
please let me know if you liked this! feedback is always appreciated!! comments and reblogs mean more than you know. <33
note: none of the gifs or images i use are mine! i get most of my images from pinterest or here, and gifs from about the same. please let me know if i ever don’t credit someone properly!
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