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#it's probably just the illness that's making me extra irritable but like.
cryolyst · 2 months
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#they speak!#it's probably just the illness that's making me extra irritable but like.#roommate kept coming up to me this morning going oh did i wake you up? i'm sorry if i did. did i do that or no? i'm really sorry.#and i kept telling him to stop saying sorry because i didn't have the brain power to phrase#'you could've been more considerate of your volume but you also have the right to use the common space so it's whatever'#but he said it to me again before i went to my room just now and it's like. ok. shut up.#if you actually cared that much u would've just been quieter in the first place actually.#anyways. annoyed. there were some annoying customers in the store today but it was whatever.#i feel like my fucks to give had already worn out with all the ppl in my social circle/my parents and the recent ongoings of that#[redacted] was being passive aggressive to me in the group chat and it's like. ok! idk what u want from me.#and i'm grateful for them for coming over and helping me with cleaning last week#and it's those sorts of actions that let me know they care and want good things for me#but like. i haaaate telling them anything because even innocuous non-private things get turned into judgement with them.#also. more and more i can feel how i'm drifting away from h and now with retrospect i can see how we mutually hurt each other :)#i keep coming back to this one period where i really wanted to take them to try dimsum and they kept saying they were too scared to try it#and in their new friend group they regularly go out n get dimsum together. which on the surface is like. why didn't you want to go with /me#i told you i wanted to share what i liked and i would explain what things were and i could do the talking and you still said no#but it's also very much a reflection of how i always rolled over and enabled them. i never challenged them. i was always passive.#i also feel like i'm heavily neglecting e and a recently and i can tell how the physical distance is affecting us and idk. it's weird.#anyways. another post that should've been a journal entry! lol!#when [redacted] helped with cleaning they also buried my journal under my like#300 packets of sesame candies and i can't be bothered to dig it out. also my bandaids are missing now. <3#ik this also sounds passive aggressive but genuinely appreciate the help i just kinda hate how they think hidin everything in boxes is good#'we need to get you some more storage boxes and containers!!' actually i think that will be the opposite of helpful.#i need everything visible and on open surfaces so i can 1) remember they exist for me to use and 2) not have barriers for me to get to them
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nomaishuttle · 1 year
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exciting day so far
#264 (the couple who pays extra to have their bed made every day (which is crazy)) knocked over a CLOCK in their room#the wife did it on accident luckily she was ok.but i had 2 hunt down maintenance to fix da clock and i thought i found a guy but apparently#he wasnt actually a maintenance guy So i might kms. but he said hed find a maintenance guy for me so..#bc my boss was like ok ryan (head of maintenance (wnd housekeeping but hes a maintenance guy. my boss is the real head of housekeeping lol)#might be in the maintenance shop. and i was like okie went in and he wasnt 💀💀💀 so i just saw a guybwearing black which i thinkk is#maintenance color and i was like halp me ! and he was like erm yeah ill find a maintenance guy for you ^-^#it was so awk tho. my job on weekdays (except tuesdays bc thats the day they get cleaned) is 2 make the bed and its usually umm#shes usually in da shower with her caretaker. not like eith but. ykwim. and the husband is usually asleep on da couch#but i got there like 10 minutes early so they were both up and also yhe husband was like Are you a guy can you help and i was like erm no#and i misunderstood i thought he was having like#a medical or#something else issue. yk. but then i overheard him talking to the wifes caretaker and realized he said CLOCK. and i was like ohhh ok..#but i finished the bed and said okie ill find a maintenance guy t come help asap :]#and he was like thanks 👍 hes very sweet idk if we had spoken b4. well probably but idr much of it#i think ive mainly spoken to da wife b4. shes very sweet shes had a stroke so its a bit difficult to understand her sometimes but shes very#nice.. i ws sooo worried thenfirst day bc allegedly we got there early (aka the time they usually went to do the bed) so now k do it at 9#which is mildly inconvenient but not too bad. ideally id be making the bed b4 i starty rooms 4 the day bc i have like an hour anf a half to#do my morning work. so i could just slot ir in real easy.. but its all good jo worries. but ya so she was kind of irritated the first day#and also it was my first time speaking to someone who had had a stroke. so i didnt realize thats just like. how she ralks and thought she#was just super duper mad. and i was like eep! but its ok.
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I'm really sick and Satan's sacrificial waterfall is here AT THE SAME TIME!
I don't know if you do blurbs or headcannons, but if so, would you be willing to write for the boys (either taskforce 141, or singular characters,) taking care of an afab reader who has never had anyone wanting to take care of them?
If not, sorry to bother!
I don't typically take requests but... since I'm in the same boat (sacrificial waterfall is probably going to come over the weekend for me), I'll 100% do it.
A while back I also posted this: "You're feeling ill" and it's also along the same vein, if you'd like an extra little pick me up.
Period woes.
Rating: G Words: 1K~ tags: afab!reader but you/your pronouns, SFW!, fluff, comfort, periods and associated symptoms.
A person’s period might be the most hypocritical moment of their routine. They’re expected to continue moving, working and living their live as normal, all with a smile on their face, while their uterus actively attempts to cut off its own circulation… as if for any other injury or sickness you wouldn’t be expected to lay down and STOP for a moment and allow yourself to heal up, or at least improve enough to not be miserable.
But no. You’re expected to deal with it alone, to not show a reaction, to not be irritable, or groaning and writhing in pain. Take a shower, stock up on painkillers and slap a smile on your face, you’ve gotta go out in the world and act as if you’re not actively dreading every waking moment you spend on your feet.
That’s why you’ve learned to hide it when you’re going through your monthly. Your family, partners… not even your girlfriends know when you’re having it. Ever since you were a young teen, just starting out, it was very much a conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know, sort of moment.
But it’s miserable. You’re always miserable. Everything hurts, the cramps, the headaches, the back pain, hip pain, your sore chest… Plus the blood, the lack of appetite (or increase in appetite), the nausea, the fact you want to cry one moment, or break dishes and scream the next, the way your colleagues annoy you beyond compare, how certain sounds grit your nerves just. enough. to make you feel like you’re losing it… And then you can’t sleep.
And of course… he notices it. How could he not?
Ghost is discreet about it. He doesn’t mention it, doesn’t make a big deal about it… But he’s VERY good at taking care of you without you noticing he’s doing it. His love language is acts of service… So he simply goes around giving you a hand on whatever you might need. Food? Made. Dishes? Done. Laundry? Washed, Dried, Folded and Put Away. He finds you trying to do something? No. Give it here, he’ll do it.
The inevitable day that a leak happens and you find yourself angry at yourself as you strip the bedsheets off the bed, trying to be discreet about it so he doesn’t see it, he silently grabs the sheets off your hands and murmurs a “Go take a shower and change. I’ve got this.” before turning to put the sheets in the washer, clean the mattress and remake the bed so you can lay down again by the time your shower is over. It makes you emotional, sometimes, that such a stoic man will gladly take on every other responsibility to allow you to heal.
Gaz, blessed be him, is an absolute sweetheart… But he’s also a silly boy. He notices and although he’s not going to make a big deal about it, he’s still very… Boyish about it. Uses all the silly names for your period (“The Communists are coming”, “Shark week”,  “Satan’s waterfall”, “Carrie”) and affectionately calls you “My little ketchup packet”. 
He’s all for ordering takeout and getting you whatever you want when and how you want it. He’ll rub your back and be very careful about where and how he touches you. He’s ginger with touches around your waist and lower stomach, looks at you with those big brown eyes of his, as if checking that he’s not hurting you or crossing a boundary. You find yourself getting emotional when he whispers about how strong you are to deal with this every month… Keeps asking gently if you need anything… It makes you feel so safe.
Price’s older. He’s been in many relationships before. He notices your period is coming before it even does… Notices how you’re acting. Jumpier, grumpier, sadder… Notices how you toss and turn the couple of nights leading up to it. And he’s silently prepared. He’s made a supply run to the grocery store to get what brand of period products you use and some painkillers and puts them where you can see them in the bathroom. 
Fills you up with warm herbal tea and food that he knows are easy to digest and help with your state. No fucking chocolate and sugar or potato chips, you’re being pumped full of soups and stews and veggies and cut up fruit. He’ll sit by your side with a paring knife and an apple and slowly peel, core and cut it, before slowly feeding you (and himself) the slices. When you try to resist it, at first, too used to doing things alone, he’ll grab your face with both hands, look into your eyes and tell you. “And why exactly would I let you do that, when you’ve got me here to help you? How does that make sense?”
Soap’s… Well… Soap’s got a bunch of sisters… Each of them dealing with their periods in wildly different ways... So one thing he knows for sure: He’s not about to assume anything. You do what you’ve got to, he’ll adjust to you. He needs to go to the bathroom but you’re in there? Copy that, he’ll go piss in the yard. You’re having a cry in the kitchen because nothing looks good but you’re hungry? Talk it out with him, what do you want to eat? Let’s figure it out together, bonnie. You need to lie down in a dark room because of a migraine or headache or just to catch on sleep you’ve missed? Johnny’s blacked out every window, gathered every stray pillow and blanket in the house and will make you a nest if he’s got to.
And when you wake up in the middle of the night with a whine and a stretch because your back hurts and you’ve got cramps and cannot for the life of you get comfortable, Johnny’s hands are rubbing over you, pressing kisses to your temple and murmuring little “I ken, love… It’ll be over soon… I’m sorry you’re going through this…”
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squerlly · 7 months
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flames of desire chapter 4: I'm creepy?...
Alastor x (f! bunny reader)
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your POV:
back at the hotel, I went straight to my room, putting all of my clothes that angel bought for me in there drawers and hangers. angel said that there weren't any shoes that work for my paws so he said to try and wear toeless socks....there comfortable but I just have to be carful were I step. walking to the lobby I decided to grab a drink, sitting on the stool "what do you want kid?" "nothing strong" sliding the drink over to me I decide to ask about what happened earlier "hay husk right..." "yeah?" "do you know who valentino is?", setting down the glass he was cleaning he turns "hes an overlord, part of the Vees ...owns a strip club angel works at" well that explains it "what's an overlord?" "you ask to many damn questions kid" "sorry...just asking since I'm still getting used to the permeant damnation thing..." "overlords are powerful demons, ranked by there power over others. humans deal in favors and money, but down here...you deal in souls. and fuckers like radio face abuse that power" radio face? that's new "you mean Alastor? "yeah kid, hes an overlord, haven't you ever seen those posters outside?" now that I think about it, no...I haven't but that would explain his whole dark and twistedness "is that why hes so creepy.." "I'm creepy?...", whipping my head around my heart feels like it just fell out of my ass "oh how you wound me dear, tell me what makes me so creepy hmm..." "well I- no I didn't mean- how long have you been standing there..." "well I heard my name and couldn't help but listen, tell me what is it that has peeked your interest in me?", "w-well husk was telling me about overlords and that you were uhm-...one" "ah yes my dear, husker is correct!, what brought up such a subject?" "oh well... me and angel ran into this Valentino guy and when I asked angel he looked so scared..." "hmm well if he works for valentino, then there's a high chance he made a contract" "contract?" "yes, a contract for his soul~" of course, a contract or a deal for a soul "husk also said something about the Vees who are they?" hearing loud static I look up, Alastors smile was tight and his expression was that of irritation, the static getting louder "oh nobody important..." "oookk..." I'm not gonna pry into that anymore, I like my second life...sorta.
Alastors POV:
so our little bunny got into some trouble with the Vees? and it seems valentino has caught interest in her, I cant have that... "tell me dear what did valentino say to you?" "hmm he asked me if I wanted to work for him, said he could make me rich or something like that" oh Valentino, how does one fine joy in taking advantage of young women, maybe he has an animal fetish or something, for once that makes my skin crawl "and what did you say?" "I told him no naturally, the guy has no boundaries, and from the way he treated angel I don't think I would want to work for somebody like him" hmm smart girl~ "well its good to know your alright!" wouldn't want my toy to be broken before iv played with it first... "i just hope angel is ok" "you need not worry about angel, I'm sure hes doing just fine dear, you shouldn't get involved" especially with the likes of such nasty people like valentino, how dare he attempt to steal my plaything, I guess ill have to show him that I don't like sharing.
your POV:
chatting with Alastor and husk I feel a bit tired, probably had one to many refills of my drink, iv always been a light weight... "its getting a bit late, I think I'm gonna head to bed now" husk takes my half empty glass as I stand from the stool "well goodnight my dear, sweet dreams~..."
I had writers block for like 30min because I just felt like adding a whole extra part for Alastor and it nearly killed me!!! but anyways I love you guys and please enjoy this chapter stay tuned~
-squerlly
@pooplyface1423 @strippezzz
for more stories and more chapters please click this masterlist
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kyday · 7 months
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Solace | Kate Bishop
Summary: It's one of those nights again where Kate disappears and doesn't come back until it's early morning. You have finally had enough. warnings: bad writing (sorry not sorry), few swear words. light angst with a happy ending. enjoy!! wordcount: 1200+ ------------------
Katiee 💘: hey love, i know you’re at work right now, but im just telling you that ill be busy the entire day. I have so much to do today so i might not be able to open my phone as often.
You: hi babyyy, its fine. i get it,  just make sure to text me once everything  is over, okay? love you.
Katiee 💘: of course, dont worry. love you too, mwuah! 9:23 am
It was 11:34 pm, the flickering lights of NYC fluttered outside your window, and the constant noise of cars passing by was nothing new. You had been up all night waiting for a reply from your girlfriend, Kate.
Her last reply was in the morning, after that— radio silence. Her silence was unnerving, although you had gotten used to her doing this, it never was this drastic. You kept opening your phone every time it turned on, expecting it was her message, but still; nothing.
You: babyy, are you free noww? if not, i hope you finish up soon. mwuah. 6:02 pm
You:
heyy, i know this is probably just one of your busy days but are you donee? lucky misses you already.  text me when you get this. 7:35 pm 
You:
kate, Im getting worried. you haven't been answering the entire day. is everything fine? please text me once you see this. 9:00 pm
You:
Kate??? Please tell me you’re okay. I'm worried sick. 9:58 pm
You anxiously paced around your bedroom, at the corner of the room Lucky was sleeping on his bed. He was planning on staying up with you but at 10 pm he accidentally fell asleep. You make your way to the dining room, leaving a light on— you’ll wait for Kate here.
You can feel your eyes slowly giving up, trying to keep yourself up— you try to rub your face to stay awake a bit more. 
This hasn’t been the first time Kate has done this. Ever since last year when she hit that large bell tower, she had changed. There were times you often pretended to not know when she had cuts or bruises— she was a bad liar. You can often see her limping or wincing every time she moves.
You never questioned her about it though. You didn't want to overwhelm her especially since her mother got sent to jail for murdering people. But ever since that— it seemed like she was burying herself in her work more and more. The cuts or bruises were more visible, you remember when she didn't come home for a day and she blamed it on her cousin who was in town and wanted some tour around NYC.
Right as you were about to fall asleep, you heard the sound of keys clattering and curses being mumbled as the person entered the front door. You recognized the voice to be Kate. “Fuck, fuck fuck.” 
She stopped in her tracks when she saw you standing in front of the couch. There was a moment of silence between you, “Where the hell have you been?” You questioned in disbelief. She puts down her bow on the nearest table, you watch her intently.
“The company had me go overtime since there were extra projects due. Look, I sorry-” 
She explains but you quickly cut her off. “Oh my god, then why the hell do you bring your fucking bow or why couldn't you even text me once? Do you think I'm stupid Kate?” She sighs, massaging her temple.
“Y/n, let's not do this right now.” She mumbles, giving you a tired look. “I'm tired, we can talk about this in the morning.” You shook your head immediately.
You stepped closer to her. “No, we are talking about this now. Because in the morning you’ll be gone even before I wake up. Goddamit, I'm not oblivious! I know that your work isn't from seven am to eleven fucking pm!” Kate is starting to become more irritated with you, trying to bite her tongue from saying anything.
“What the hell are you hiding from me? I was worried sick, I waited up until what? Eleve-” You look at the clock. 12:10 am. “Its fucking midnight!” Kate knows she deserves this, but she's tired, way too tired to fight right now.
“Who said you had to fucking wait for me?” She replies, stunning you.
You let out a sarcastic laugh, “Oh my god, maybe because I'm your girlfriend, Kate! Have you ever thought of that?”
As the tension in the room thickened, Kate's expression softened, and she let out a heavy sigh. "I'm sorry, okay? I didn't mean to worry you," she said, her voice tinged with exhaustion. "I know I've been distant lately, and I haven't been completely honest with you."
You can feel your frustration, but you are also worried. “Then why, Kate? Why do you keep shutting me out? Why are you not telling me the truth?” Kate looks down in guilt, her superhero duties have been such a huge thing for her that she forgot her true priority, you.
“I haven't been honest with you..” She starts off.
“No shit Sherlock.” You mumble, earning a smile from her.
She coughs, “I know this may uh- this may seem unbelievable but I've been working with Hawkeye to bring this organization down.” She stopped to see your reaction, but your face was like stone. “And just— today we were so close to getting them but they got away.” Kate continues, her voice turning into a whisper at the end, you can hear the disappointment in her voice.
“But you didn't have to hide it from me, Kate.” You start, tears welled up in Kate’s eyes.
“I didn't want to make you worry, I'm so sorry.” She whispers.
You walk over to her and wipe her tears. “I'm always worrying about you, you know that. It doesn't matter how crazy your story is. Hell, if you told me you were fighting aliens, I would believe you. Because I trust you, Kate. And I need you to put that same trust in me.” You explain, hugging her.
You can feel her nod against your chest. “No more secrets, okay?” 
“Okay.” She mumbles, latching onto you.
You chuckle, “Come on, we can cuddle in bed.” She protests for a second, saying she wants to lie down on the floor. But you manage to convince her into going to the bedroom for cuddles.
She plops down on the mattress, and you follow behind her. “I'm sorry again, I won't do it again, love.” She looks up at your eyes, you smile at her. 
“It's okay now. Just go to bed, okay?” She nods, and she inches closer to you before pressing her lips onto yours. “Goodnight baby.”
“Goodnight love.” Kate mumbles tiredly, cuddling up to you. And for a moment, the loud cars outside quieted down, and the bright city lights weren't so bright anymore. 
Kate realized that she could only have this comfort with you.
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kokusfluffyhair · 1 year
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Kokushibou when you're sick
I've been sick the past week (it's getting better), so time to imagine what it would be like if my favourite stoic samurai demon was here to take care of me Instead of me having to take care of myself
You don't want him to worry about you, so when you get that annoying little sore feeling in your throat, you don't say anything. You continue on as normal, because you know that he can't get human illnesses as a demon. But he still marks that there is something not right with your body (damn that transparent world -- you can't keep anything from him). You're doing some light work you're probably editing your damn thesis and Kokushibou comes up to you and stands behind you.
"What?" you ask, noticing him there.
"You should ... rest ..." he says.
"Why?" you ask, not turning around to face him.
Kokushibou grunts a little under his breath. "You ... are falling ... ill ..."
You know he's right because you feel it yourself, and that's why you're trying to get as much done as you can before you're feeling bad.
"I feel fine," you say to him.
You can sense that he's irritated, but he's not the type to force you to stop writing. Instead, he sits down behind you and crosses his arms, staring at you with all six of his eyes.
You keep writing, feeling his gaze on you, but it soon becomes too annoying for you to just ignore.
"Why are you here?" you ask him.
Kokushibou says nothing.
You turn to look at him over your shoulder. "Can you go away?" you ask.
"I ... am going ... nowhere ..." he says.
You groan. "Fine, but can you stop staring at me?"
He says nothing. You have to either stop working or keep yourself from getting too annoyed at his staring. You decide to try to ignore him.
This continues until you're done writing for the day. After that, Kokushibou offers to make you a warm bath and some warm tea. It feels like he's pushing himself too much into your space, but you understand that he senses what you feel in your throat, so you let him do it.
When your condition worsens, Kokushibou doesn't leave your side. He knows it's just a cold and it's not going to kill you. He's not scared for you, but he feels bad that you are going to be uncomfortable and ill for several days. It's times like these that he wishes he had made you a demon, and considers making you a demon once you are well again.
He gets you everything you could possibly need -- tissues, blankets, water, warm tea, soup, medication, fruit. He cooks human food for you and makes sure you are getting enough nutrition. He doesn't say much during all of this time. He normally doesn't say much, but at times like this, he's even more silent than usual. It's because of how bad he feels that you are sick.
If you get chills and feel cold, he will not only wrap you in a blanket, but he will also hug you non-stop. You're like a little cocoon in his arms. He's always feeling your forehead and will put a cool cloth on your forehead if he feels you are too warm.
He tries to do things to entertain you. He will play games with you or read to you. If it was in the modern times, he'd watch your favourite series with you, regardless of how much he liked it or didn't like it. The good thing is that, because he can't get human illnesses, that he can cuddle and kiss you as much as he wants without the risk of getting sick himself.
He isn't bothered if you cough or sneeze on him. But if anyone else did, they would no longer be breathing. Don't cough or sneeze on him deliberately. Kokushibou finds this to be very, very rude. But if it happens by accident, it happens. He doesn't mind. He will always have tissues ready for you if you need them.
When you are starting to get better, you can see the relief in him. Of course, he can see in the transparent world that you are overcoming the virus too. He hates seeing you uncomfortable, so it pleases him to no end to see that you will be back to normal soon.
Once you are better, he will be extra protective for a while. He considers you to be in a weakened state because your body had to fight something off. Kokushibou will be clinging to you a lot, and will insist that you wear a scarf and hat when going out for the next week. When you're sleeping together, he makes sure you are extra warm, too. It is a bit overbearing, but you know that he does it because he's concerned. He loves you and wants to make sure you stay healthy.
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maywinchester · 11 months
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You Think You Do
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Female!Reader
Word Count: 911
Warnings: Based around the end of season 9, Sick reader, Dean's self pity, angst, fluff
Author's Note: Holy shit balls so I've never posted a fanfic before! I have written many in my brain for my own self-indulgence but I've never written any out much less posted anything other than sharing other's works. So with that I'll say sorry in advance if it sucks, all feedback is appreciated! I don't own any rights to Supernatural, so lets get started!! :D
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It had been weeks since you felt like yourself, & it hadn’t gone unnoticed. Your headaches had become almost constant with short spells of relief in between & you felt like you had a weight inside your chest, making it hard to breathe & pulling your chest to the ground. Your other symptoms included fatigue (& the dark circles that came with it) irritability, general weakness & wheezing, especially when you slept. Things were only getting worse, which meant that the boys constant fussing over you was getting worse too.
Sam was logical; when you first started showing symptoms he suggested fluids & rest, he treated it like a cold, which is what you thought it was. Now that it was apparently more, he was hitting the medical books in the Men of Letters laboratory. 
Dean, however, had treated it like the Spanish Flu from the beginning &, now that it had turned out to be more serious, he was almost insufferable.
One thing had really peaked Dean’s interest though: Why wasn’t anyone else catching this? Dean had been right under you from the moment he noticed a change & before that he was constantly around you as well. The question only heightened his anxiety & so did Sam’s silence when Dean brought it to his attention.
“I don’t know man. Something’s not sittin’ right with me. Y/N never gets sick, ever.” 
His voice was extra gritty, lined with worry. It carried down the hall to you & Dean’s shared room where you laid, trying to fall asleep, & listened as your heart broke for him. You knew it was serious & it was probably too late for anything short of angelic. With Cas still MIA, things were starting to look bleak, but you still didn’t want to let in on just how bad you felt.
“I know” Sam sounded tired “We’ll find something Dean.” 
You heard Dean coming down the hall, dragging his feet as he walked. The guilt crept in, you could tell they were exhausted. You held your breath until you saw him in the doorway & gave him a faint smile, trying your hardest not to seem as weak as you felt. 
“D” your voice was barely a whisper, but he was close enough to hear as he sat beside you on the bed, brushing your hair back. You closed your eyes & hummed, taking in the feel of his rough but gentle hand as he rested it on your cheek & the smell of whiskey as his warm breath fanned over your face. 
“We’re trying to find something sweetheart” He had that look, the one for when hope was dwindling down & he was preparing himself for the worst but trying to put on a face for you. 
“I know.. I heard” You move over to make room for him & he lays down before you even have to ask, wrapping an arm around you & pulling you into his chest. 
“Are you okay?” He scoffs at that & you look up at him. Why are you asking if he’s okay when you so clearly are not? You see the battle in his eyes as he contemplates his answer.
“I wish it was me.” You take a deep breath & a moment to appreciate that he told you the truth, & to realize what that means to Dean Winchester. What you mean to him, & your heart breaks a little more. You wanted to tell him just how bad you felt, to lean on him the way you knew you could, but he was already feeling defeated & the last thing you wanted to do was confirm his fears.
“I know.. but then I’d be wishing it were me.” You give him a knowing look, you know he’d rather take the illness & whatever consequences than sit there & watch you deal with it.
“Let's be honest though, I handle these things better than you” You shoot him a playful smile that he tries to return. 
“You shouldn’t have to handle them at all Y/N. You don’t deserve this.”
“But you think you do.” It wasn't a question & he refused to meet your eyes, staring a hole in the door.
“I think we both deserve for Cas to show his ass & fix this.” Dean’s tone was harsh, probably more than he meant to be. His everyday frustrations were elevated by the Mark, but you’d learned to let it go, you knew he was doing his best.
“Maybe, but he has other people to look after now.” He looks at you then, wondering how you can be so understanding while being so miserable. You read him like a book.
“I know, I’m a saint.” you grin, the biggest you’ve had the energy for in days, & he returns it, genuinely this time. He holds your gaze for a moment before you look away, shy for no reason in particular, other than the green eyes staring back at you.
“You really are” you look back at him then, a questioning brow raised “You deal with my crap constantly, you take care of me & Sam. You’ve stuck by us even when everyone else left. You’ve been tortured for us, you’ve died for us.”
“Well, it was more for you, but yes” you laughed. “I love Sam, but some of those demons really do have a gift” He winced at the memory.
“I’m gonna do whatever it takes to get you better” He looked deep into your eyes, making sure you understood the seriousness of his promise.
“I know.. you always have.”
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master-muffinn · 4 months
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Digimon
When they find a human child. (The kid is 4-5 years gender/neutral reader)
It was forever ago that I watched digimon and the different versions. I had to look up some of the digimons personalities. This is basically taken from different shows, mostly generation 1. The digimons that I like and are easy to place the right text to. 
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Is the big and mature digimon who will help the kid find their home. They know the moment they see you that you don’t belong to this world and made it their mission to help you find a way back. They are used to dealing with younger digimons so a human child is no big deal. They pick you up and ask you a lot of questions about your parents, how you came here, where you are coming from etc. The longer it takes the more worried they get, because digiworld is not a safe place for a little human child. Don’t worry though, they will take care of you until you find your way back home. They will teach you how to survive in this world. What you can eat and not, how you can defend yourself and what to do in different situations. They probably will start calling you their kid at some point and will feel proud and happy that you see them as a parental figure.
^ LEOMON, ANGEMON, ANGEWOMON, Frigimon, Renamon, Gabumon, Lilymon, Piximon, Lilamon, Biyomon, wormmon, Andromon? ^
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“Ew why are the brat following me?! Go somewhere else!!”. Doesn't like the kid at all and tries to get rid of it. Not by killing it or hurting it of course! They are not that cruel! But by running/flying away or tricking the kid to go somewhere or putting the kid in a box or hanging them up on a nail on a wall. Really, they try many different ways and become satisfied when they ‘think’ they have succeeded until the kid is sticking to their side and they sigh and get irritated. However when they finally succeed in getting rid of you they stay there and wait..and waiting..and waiting a little extra just to make sure you aren’t coming, just for them to miss you and getting worried. “Hey Brat! Where did you go?! Come back!” They end up taking a liking to you instead but they are pretty awkward about it. “Hey! Don’t go there! That’s dangerous!”. Yes, you somehow became their annoying little brat but they do have a soft spot for you, however they are not good at parenting though! 
^ BEELZEMON, Ogremon, ETEMON, Impmon, Ranamon ^
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Say goodbye to your parents! You are theirs now! All you really did was call them “pretty” or “cool” with excitement in your eyes and they instantly fell for you and adopted you. They take you up in their arms? Paws? Claws? and take you home and fix a room fitting for you. They might spoil you to make sure you want to stay and have you ‘forget’ about your real parents. They will spend a lot of time with their kid, teach them things they know and totally show off while doing it too!
If anyone questions it they get upset, “What do you mean they’re not my kid?! Of course they are! Yeah they’re human, so what?! All babies don't come out of an egg”. Their parent instincts kick in whenever you aren’t around them or they don’t know where you are. “Where’s my baby!!” 😨 
^ LILITHMON, ELECMON ^ 
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Awkward... They aren’t used to being around kids at all and lacking knowledge about them. Like what are they supposed to do? They don’t have the heart to just leave the kid, what if they die? They go around and ask other digimons if they know anything about humans or where they are coming from, so they can take you home. What do humans even eat? What do they feed them with?? What if the human gets ill?” 
They do find the little human cute and they don’t mind the hugs and affection you are giving them, however- they believe that they aren’t good enough to take care of you so they search for someone else who could do a better job. Of course they have gotten attached to you and will have difficulties saying goodbye when they find the right person and place. Might or might not cry when they hug you farewell, maybe you’ll meet in the future when you are older, maybe you can be together then…
^ BAALMON,  Wizardmon, Orgemon, Andromon, Gazimon?  ^
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They found you by accident. At first they watch you from afar for a while. Finding you very interesting and adorable. They already know at first glance you are a human from another world and the chances for you to come home is pretty low. 
They approach you slowly so as not to scare you and ask you questions about you and your home. The longer they talk to you the more comfortable they become and they actually enjoy themself. They end up offering you food at their place. And somehow along the way you end up in their care and now they are much more happy and have something precious to protect who needs them.
Knowing you are safe and waiting for them to come home and knowing you will be happy to see them will get them through even the toughest days.
^ DEVIMON, BEELZEMON (xros wars), gatomon ^
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“Oooh!! A new friend!! Let’s play together!”. These digimon is basically a child themself and doesn't think so much about the difference. Ask you what kind of digimon you are. Actually, they don't really care what you are! A friend is still a friend no matter what! Will ask you a lot of questions. They might get you in trouble but they will of course protect and defend you if something bad happens even if themself aren’t that strong. 
At the end of the day you will fall asleep together under a big tree. You got yourselves a lifelong friend (hopefully) and will take care of one another. <3 
^ GUILMON, CULUMON, MarineAngemon, Lunamon, Patamon ^ 
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Wow you are very unlucky if you meet these digimon. You probably become their dinner or even worse, they see you as a toy to play with (and not so nicely). Will totally chase you and throw hurtful stuff at you while laughing. And when the fun is over and they get bored, they will probably kill you, unless your screams are heard and the digimon from the first text/part will come and save you!
^ Kuwagamon, Myotismon, Diaboromon, Bakemon, Scumon-(probably won't kill you tho) ^ 
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Thank you for reading and if you like it, reblogs are very appreciated! <3
Made by @master-muffinn
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ladamedusoif · 9 months
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Secrets (Marcus Pike x GN!Reader)
A Merry Fic-Mas - December 24
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Part of A Merry Fic-Mas: A Pedro Boy Holiday Fic Calendar - click for masterlist.
Follow my writing blog @ladameecrit and turn on notifications to keep up with my writing.
Pairing: Marcus Pike x GN!Reader 
Word count: 1743
Rating: Teen
Warnings: Angst; fluff; references to parental illness; no use of Y/N; no physical descriptions of reader; no gendered pronouns; minor swearing
A/N: This can be read as a standalone, but I wrote it thinking of Marcus and Reader from ‘Hot Chocolate’ and ‘Christmas Market’ in this series.
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“How’s Marcus?” Your mother’s voice is bright and breezy on the call.
You pause a little too long for her liking. 
“Is everything okay?”
“It’s fine, mom, it’s just…he’s not himself, lately. I thought we were all set for the holidays - you know how we booked a little cabin in the Blue Ridge Mountains - but every time I try to talk about packing or planning, he gets tetchy and weird.”
“Maybe it’s work stress? He does have a lot on. Poor Marcus.”
“So do I, mom, and I’m not taking it out on him. Every time I ask him outright he just says everything’s fine but it isn’t. It’s like he’s hiding something from me.”
Your mother tut-tuts. “That’s not Marcus. He would never keep secrets from you.”
“I wish I could be as confident as you are.”
***
With Christmas falling on a Monday, you and Marcus had planned to take off on the Saturday morning, making the most of the extra days off before the holiday. By Friday night, he’s got the bags ready to load into the car and your refrigerator is groaning with food for the vacation, all ready to be stacked in cool bags for the journey.
Things hadn’t improved much in the time since you’d voiced your fears to your mother. Marcus remained unusually tetchy and irritable, a far cry from his usual sunny self. He insisted he was looking forward to the time away with you, but there was just something off. Something hidden underneath the surface, and for the first time in your relationship he had put up enough defences so that you couldn’t reveal the truth. 
Maybe he’s unhappy, you think to yourself. Maybe the vacation is make or break.
Your stomach churns as you imagine five days away with Marcus while he tries to decide if you need to end the relationship or not. 
Your phone rings as you’re sorting out a couple of bottles of wine for the trip. Mom. You brush it off, muttering to yourself that you’ll call her later, once the packing is done. 
It’s barely two minutes later that Marcus comes into the kitchen, talking on his phone while trying to catch your attention. 
“I’ll put you on now…sure. Sure. Well, I’m sure he’ll be okay, I’m so sorry - okay, keep us posted.”
He hands you the phone, mouthing “Your mom”.
“Mom?”
“Oh, darling, I’m sorry… you’re probably up to your neck with packing and sorting for the trip.”
“Just tell me, mom. You wouldn’t call Marcus if it wasn’t urgent.”
“Darling…it’s your dad. He’s had a fall, he’s in hospital, and -”
Your heart drops. “Mom, is he okay?”
She pauses a second too long. “Fine, fine… just hasn’t regained consciousness yet but it’s fine! I just felt you would be angry if I waited until after your trip to tell you. But it’s fine!”
“Mom, you’ve said ‘it’s fine’ so many times I’m pretty sure it isn’t fine.”
“Sweetheart, please just go on your trip and we’ll keep you posted. Okay?”
You become aware of Marcus peeking around the corner, trying to assess your mood from the tone of your voice and your body language. 
“Did the doctors say when they think he’ll regain consciousness?”
Another pause.
“They’re not sure, sweetie.”
You look up at Marcus, your eyes looking into his as you tell your mom you’ll be home tomorrow.
***
He swears it’s fine, but you know Marcus is annoyed. Or hurt. Or maybe a mix of both. 
Shit, maybe this really was a make or break vacation.
He had offered to come with you, but you dissuaded him, not wanting him to have to be thrown head-first into the madness that was your family - crisis or no crisis. 
“I’ll just stay here, I guess.” He casts an eye over the bags in the hallway. 
“Babe, no.” You wrap your arms around his waist. “We paid for the cabin and it’s too late to cancel now. It would be a pity not to use it at all. You’ve got that stack of reading you want to do. And, like, when dad wakes up I can come down and join you. What do you think?”
He doesn’t quite meet your gaze. “I guess.”
“I love you, Marcus. I’m so sorry.”
He sucks on the inside of his cheek and kisses you - not on the mouth, but on the cheek. “I love you, too.”
***
When you arrive home in Ohio you hop straight in a cab to the hospital, where your mother and siblings have spent the night keeping vigil. You try not to panic when you see your dad, hooked up to a morass of tubes and wires. 
“The doctors say it looks worse than it is,” your older sister explained. She holds out a bag of peppermint candies. “Candy?”
It’s several hours before you realise you haven’t let Marcus know you got there safely, like you promised. Too busy trying to get a clear answer from your mom about what, exactly, the doctors have said, and distracted by trying to track down a doctor to discuss a prognosis. 
Hey babe - I’m sorry, I have been talking to my mom and the doctors here. Dad okay, still no sign of improvement but stable. Love you - call you tomorrow.
You spend that night at the hospital, insisting that your mom go home and rest. You watch the dark sky brighten, slowly but surely, as Christmas Eve dawns. 
“It’s Christmas Eve, dad,” you murmur, unsure if he can hear you or not. “You’re not in the drunk tank, though,” you joke, referring to his favourite Christmas song, ‘Fairytale of New York’. “Just in hospital. I’ll let you know if the NYPD choir turns up.”
You get up and stretch your legs, wandering into the hallway in search of caffeine and sugar. The hospital cafe is quiet and you grab a cup of black coffee and a donut before returning to your dad’s floor. 
Panic sets in when you see nurses moving in and out of his room. One of them turns, spots you, and grins. 
“He’s waking up! Can you call your mom?”
By lunchtime, he’s fully awake and talking, grumbling about not being allowed home for Christmas. You duck out later in the afternoon to call Marcus and update him.
It goes straight to voicemail.
***
The hot shower feels like heaven as you rinse away the strain of the last couple of days. Well, some of it, anyway. Marcus still hasn’t answered your calls.
Thankfully, you’ve found a distraction, volunteering to prep some food at your parents’ house that can be easily taken to the hospital for Christmas Day. You slip on a pair of soft old sweatpants and a college hoodie and pad around the kitchen, filling some Tupperware containers with individual servings of cold cuts and salads while listening to the cheesy Christmas show on the local radio station.
You crawl into bed late that night, casting one final glance at your phone. 
Still nothing.
***
You stir awake at about two in the morning, roused by a thumping noise coming from somewhere in the house. As your brain adjusts, you realise it’s someone knocking on the door. 
You grab your brother’s old baseball bat as you descend the stairs. Can’t hurt to be prepared, after all. And you’re pretty sure this isn’t Santa Claus calling.
You open the door slowly, reluctantly. 
A pair of coffee-brown eyes. A soft, uncertain smile. Cheeks flushed with cold. 
“Marcus?”
He rubs his hands together and stamps his feet. “Can I come in? Got really cold in the car on the way up here.”
You fling your arms around him as he steps inside, forgetting the strangeness of the last few weeks. “What the hell are you doing here?”
He holds his soft, dark green knitted cap in his hands and looks nervous. Really nervous.
“I… I had to see you.”
Oh, shit. Wait - is he going to break up with you on Christmas morning? While your dad’s in hospital?!
“Ooookay.”
“Baby, I -” He falters. “This isn’t how I wanted to do this.”
He is definitely about to break up with you. And good riddance, because he’s clearly heartless.
“Just get it over and done with, Marcus.”
He takes a deep breath and exhales, long and slow.
“I wanted to have the space to do this at the cabin, y’know?”
“Marcus. Just say it.”
“Baby, I’m so grateful for you - you’re the most incredible person I’ve ever met, so kind, so loving, and -”
You’ve had it. “Marcus - just say you don’t want to be with me. You’ve been weird for weeks. You’re here on Christmas fucking Day, having driven a seven-hour journey to get here. You obviously can’t be with me a minute longer, so you might as well just -”
He has dropped to one knee.
Wait. What?
“I wanted to ask you to marry me.”
Your jaw drops. For once, you’re stunned into silence.
“Baby?”
“I…Marcus. I just…is this…fuck.”
He reaches into his coat pocket and presents you with a little box. “Um, do you mind if I stand up again? My knees aren’t what they used to be.”
You chuckle and help him to his feet, before opening the box to find a perfect, simple engagement ring. 
“I can’t believe it, Marcus.”
He shrugs. “You seemed sure we were about to break up. I’m sorry I’ve been so stressed the last few weeks, my love. I was just readying everything for a perfect proposal, in the mountains, and I was so worried you’d say no, and then the ring was delayed, and then - well. And then your dad got sick. But he’s awake? I’m sorry, I only just saw your messages. My phone was in the trunk.”
You lift your gaze from the ring. “He’s awake. And I’m sorry, too - I didn’t know what you were keeping from me, and I didn’t even think of this.”
Marcus raises an eyebrow. “You didn’t think I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you?”
You chuckle. “Mmmm. Maybe I thought a man as perfect as you couldn’t possibly want someone like me.”
He pulls you tight to him and kisses you. “Baby, you forgot something.”
You look confused. “I did?”
“You didn’t give me an answer yet.”
Tears shining in your eyes, you slip the ring on your finger. “A million times yes, Marcus Pike. Provided there are no more secrets.”
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bubblez-bubble · 14 days
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Everyone in Fairy Tail represents a disorder and/or an illness (either physical and/or mental). And Fairy Tail never happened, it's a hospital, and Fairy Tail takes place in one of the patients minds as part of their disorder.
Here me out.
This is going to be a tribute to National Suicide Prevention Month as a reminder everyone has their own battle to face and never assume you know what's going on from the outside looking in. (Also disclaimer: none of this is canon. It's a fan-based headcanon and some representation may be off, but as someone who studies psychology and personal/mental health in their free time in an attempt to better understand myself, I'm going to try to be as accurate as possible and try to give as much detail as I can.) If you or a loved one is struggling for any reason, don't be afraid to reach out and seek answers or help. Your silence is not worth a life. Especially yours. If you're like me and seeking professional medical help is out of your reach for any reason, be it financially or otherwise, contact your local suicide prevention hotline for free accessible 24-hour help. You may be fighting what feels like a losing battle, but you don't have to fight it alone. And just remember, everyone is fighting their own fight. So please don't give up and just hold on tight. And know if you don't have anyone else in your corner, I will be.
Now onto the headcanon.
For now I'll just be doing the main team (post nirvana), but let me know if you'd be interested in seeing what the characters may represent.
Also I'll be doing brief break downs of these characters. If you'd like a full synopsis on a particular character let me know!
Natsu- Binge Eating Disorder and Intermittent Explosive Disorder
First let's look at the definitions.
Binge Eating Disorder or BED is when a person unhealthily over consumes excessively large quantities of food in one sitting or during a single meal.
Intermittent Explosive Disorder or IED is a mental disorder that can cause frequent, sudden, or impulsive episodes of anger. It can be categorized with road rage, domestic abuse, THROWING OR BREAKING OJECTS, TEMPER TANTRUMS, FREQUENT VERBAL ARGUMENTS, FREQUENT PHSYICAL FIGHTING, and PROPERTY DAMAGE.
There are two things Natsu is most known for in universe: picking a fight whenever and where ever and always feeling hungry. In almost every meal we see him have seen him eat, he eats in exaggerated large quantities. And yes you can argue that it's because his magic is so demanding plus his physical upkeep (training) is probably the reason for this. However, none of the other dragon slayers indulge like this, with the exception of Sting and Rogue during their guilds annual eating contest. He's also extremely prone to losing his temper, picking fights, and destroying everything within about a 20 mile radius. Which you could say that this personality trait compliments his magic, but that part actually ties into the headcanon itself. Let me explain. The person who's imagining all of this from the hospital sees Natsu's disorders and decides the perfect way for him to fit into their little imaginary world and by being a fire wizard. Fire perfectly compliments Natsu's anger issues and gives him a reason to eat so excessively in this person's mind so his body can keep up with the extra calories it's constantly burning.
Erza - PTSD
PTSD or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is a mental disorder that can develop after a person experiences or witnesses a traumatic event and vary based on severity. It can often make its victims irritable, hostile, hypervigilant, self-destructive, and even socially isolated or feeling awkward. It can cause flashbacks, severe anxiety, a feeling of mistrust in others and can even cause feelings of guilt and/or loneliness. It can bring about nightmares and insomnia and can cause emotional detachment and an increase in intrusive thoughts or impulsive actions. Two of the most common causes of PTSD are military trauma and abuse. And perhaps Erza experienced both.
Erza is a strong willed character who often has flashbacks of her time in the tower of heaven. She can often find it hard to trust others for a time, but sympathizes with those who felt the same pain and torment she did in the tower. She usually tries to remain calm but can at times have extreme outbursts of anger and always seems to be weary and hyper aware of her surroundings. It's rare to see her let her guard down which she seems to do very well with the women and not as well with the men (with the exception of Natsu, Gray, and Makrov). This attitude seems to shift after Alvarez as she seems more distant and hostile with new females introduced than she is with the new men introduced afterwards. This could be due to Erza being abandoned and nearly killed by her own mother which was revealed in the Alverez arc.
Gray - OCD
OCD or Obessive Compulsive Disorder is usually defined as a need to be clean all of the time as well as everything around you. Depending on the severity of the disorder it can make you feel as though nothing is ever clean enough from the floor you're standing on to the CLOTHES YOU WEAR.
Gray is often seen without his clothes straight down to his skippies and in some instances even without them. Yes its explained in Gray's flashbacks to childhood that this is because this was how his master, Ur, trained him as a child and that those teachings were drilled so deep into his head that he just strips subconsciously. During a fight or when using magic. But what about normally when he's just relaxing. If it were instilled him that hard, then shouldn't Lyon be the same way? But to our knowledge, he isn't. The only time we've seen him do the same is in battle. The truth is Gray continues to do so because being trained to strip down to the bare minimum for battle gave him a comfortable feeling that he hadn't felt before and for the first time in his life, he started feeling comfortable in his own skin. Now as an adult, even if that's not the case anymore, it still happens subconsciously usually when he starts feeling some levels of stress. It's often common for those with OCD to comply to their urges, subconsciously or not, when they feel some kind of stress. It could be anxiety, excitement, rage, etc.
Wendy - Neotenic Complex Sydrome
Neotenic Complex Sydrome (NCS) or forever baby sydrome is a rare condition that makes one appear as if they aren't aging at all. In most cases this can make a grown person appear to be a toddler or even younger. In some less severe cases, it can cause an adult to simply look like a child.
Wendy is the only character in Fairy Tail we never see grow or change except in experience and power. Even after 2 whole years after the Tenrou incident she doesn't grow "even an inch" according to Wendy herself. Even Auska, the youngest member of Fairy Tail seems to be growing over those 2 years, but Wendy remains the same. We do see her as a child and she has clearly grown from childhood, however, Sting and Rogue were meant to be the same age as Wendy. In Anna's flashback we see all 5 dragon slayers as children and despite Wendy most probable to be the oldest, (W - Feb 27th, S - April 25th, R - unknown other than he was born the same year as wendy and Sting, so I say most probable to be the oldest because she was born at the start of the year and it's likely Rogue was born later in the year), she's still the smallest of the three. You can argue that girls are inherently smaller than boys, but that's not always the case. In fact as children it's quite often that girls are actually bigger than boys. And it tends to be true that your age shows better as a child and less so as you get older. So if Wendy was born first, shouldn't she have had the most time to grow and be bigger than Sting and Rogue?
Happy - Therapy Animal
Happy doesn't so represent a disorder as he does the hospitals therapy animal. More often than not, Happy gives comfort to those around him as a therapy animal would do in a hospital. He's particularly close to two of the patients, Natsu obviously as he seems to know just what to tell Natsu to get him to calm down long enough to listen when he notices things are starting to get out of hand. And the other will make sense when we get to them. In the hospital outside of the imaginary world of the other patient, Happys just a normal cat who goes to each patient to comfort them and help them come to terms with their disorders. He can even at times experience their disorders with them to create a visual for the patient about what their disorder is and how it can affect them and those around them. Which could be why we often see him indulge himself with eating when he's with Natsu specifically.
Carla/Charle - Doctor
Like Happy, Carla more plays a role than has a disorder. She's the hospitals doctor. She's the most realistic of the bunch and is the only one that has two forms. Human and exceed. Her exceed form would protane to her being a doctor trained to only one profession. As we know she grew up with Wendy, so in the hospital, it's quite possible that she was Wendy's doctor growing up and was the one in charge of her treatments and that's why she's so protective of Wendy. She later would become the doctor for the whole team as Wendy was now healthy enough to be introduced to other people with little to no consequence and it would be much easier to group the patients that spend a lot of time together with the same doctor. But of course she would have to further her education and training to be able to handle the other conditions of the other patients. So she evolved. And that's how we got human Carla/Charle. Because now she's trained in more than one profession so she has more than one form.
And last but most certainly not least...
Lucy - Schizophrenia
Schizophrenia is a mental disorder that can cause hallucinations, delusions, or even cause the patient to recede into their own mind that can cause disorganized thinking and behavior.
The story of Fairy Tail is told from Lucy's perspective. I've seen the theories and the headcanons that the story is simply one that takes place in Lucy's mind as she's writing about it. And that's what got me thinking about this whole thing. The 7 years on Tenrou was a 7 year coma Lucy herself endured and when she woke up, everyone she knew when she went under was still there, including Wendy who hadn't changed at all hence why she had to be at least one of the wizards to go to Tenrou Island for the s-class trials, despite being a newcomer, the youngest member of the guild, and a child. In order to make this happen, Lucy had to imagine her with a rare magic type to ensure her spot on the s-class trials and since Little Wendy wants to be a doctor as an adult, her magic reflects that making her the sky dragon slayer and a healer. While this doesn't explain why no one else aged in her mind, it could be that she just didn't want to think time kept moving for her friends so she froze them in time along with her so she didn't have to feel she missed on their adventures. In her mind, when time stopped for her, it stopped for everyone in the hospital, at least all of the patients. Because Wendy never ages she assumed that because Wendy hadn't aged, neither had anyone else. Now wouldn't Happy as a normal cat be noticeably aged. Nope. The original Happy died a long time ago and was replaced with a similar looking cat who they've also chose to name Happy for those who can't or find it hard to adapt to change. Or it could be they simply chose to replace Happy when he got old for that same reason. To keep the illusion that nothing was changing for those who couldn't handle it or have a hard time doing so. So in Lucy's fantasy, nothing changed for any of the patients in 7 years while she was under. The entire story is an adventure Lucy is imagining while the hospital undergoing treatment. And as someone with schizophrenia, she sees the treatments and medications as an enemy that needs to be defeated that they're all fighting together. And Zeref (at least in the OG series) is a phsycatrist, who became one to initially help his younger brother watching his parents struggle to take care of him and his needs, which made him the number one enemy in Lucy's mind. The demons from the books of Zeref were pych students in training, including Natsu, who has been a patient so long as well as her friend that Lucy can't accept it and continues to see him as one of her friends who's just fighting off his demon side further complicating their relationship in universe. Her celestial spirits are her imaginary friends that help her and tell her how to fight off the medication and treatments, and when she sacrificed Aquarius for the Celestial Spirit King, she was actually choosing to start to get better by giving up her most beloved imaginary friend and taking the medication. She later decided she couldn't go through with it and chooses to "find Aquarius" again. Her magic also correlates to her real life personality as gazing at the stars and finding the constellations was the only thing that made her feel "normal" and was one of her favorite things to do, so she named her imaginary friends after the constellations and her magic to do with summoning them to help her fight her enemies.
I know this all seems far-fetched and I tired to be as sensitive to each disorder as I could giving enough descriptive details trying not to make this too long. I did extensive reasearch on each disorder before decidibg to share this and even share a few of them myself. But this has been brewing in my head for years and I feel the most comfortable place for me to share is online with a bunch of strangers. Again if you want a full synopsis with extensive detail on any of these characters or any of the others from the show, then let me know! I'd be happy to go into this deeper if anyone's interested!
And remember, if you ask for help, you aren't burdening anyone. This post is also a reminder that everyone is struggling with something even if you can't see it. Don't be afraid to reach out if you're struggling. There is another way out. Don't give up. You are strong. You are loved. Your life is worth more than your silence. 🧡💛
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trainingdummyrabbit · 16 days
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oooooooobhhhh...... would it be alright if you talked abt ur ocs......... if it's not a bother.......
stands here like some sort of beast . this took me two days. im so sorry. inhales
i can absolutely talk abt my ocs yeah :D never ever a bother!!
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this is rose and wolfe! theyre two of my lobcorp ocs whom i love very dearly :] they (and the rest of their group) have their own lil story going on, but i say that very loosely bc im just having fun honestly ^_^ and they sure do love making decisions that make that Rather Difficult For Me. but alas, anyhow,
this is inevitably going to get Pretty Fucking Long! (post-post edit. ~35 paragraphs.) so if youre prepared for that. 👍 yippy!! anyway hope you like fucked up little lesbians bc here we go
im probably going to be retreading ground here a bit bc im gonna try and take it from the top, but also because i dont remember what ive said and what i havent so ill just say whatever i remember ^_^
the basic gist of th storyline is that its kind of a pseudo-murdermystery but instead of dying u get turned into some sort of beastie ! ^_^ aka 'nobody knows what the distortion phenomenon is yet and are kinda too busy freaking out about it to notice headquarters exploded last week'. dont worry about that.
slaps notes on the table. this is gonna be really messy and maybe kinda incomprehensible but its ok bc this is just how its going to be. hope this helps.
OK LISTEN. they started out as one thing and then slowly kinda turned into something else and theyve been haunting me for months but they make talking about them Literally Impossible because of how much they just. fucking cling to each other, narratively. its impossible. they make everything so fucking difficult.
wolfe is some offshoot of a take on those Edgy Playground Wolf Ocs that you see a lot in middle school-- or well, thats the root of it. she was always going to be played fully seriously, but everyone was kinda written more silly-like towards the beginning anyhow. yknow, one of those 'orphan lab experiment who pretty much had to take care of themself and really hates people, with Cool Mysterious Powers theyre really conflicted about' type characters. and honestly a lot of that still sticks, really.
she presents herself in a kind of over-the-top way to try and get people to take her seriously and leave her alone, but honestly its just kind of . offputting.. in a way, shes kind of a stand-in for what its like to be a teenager (neurodivergence notwithstanding). sometimes the only thing you can do to get people to listen to you is to make a scene and yell really loud! and everyone will always discredit it as just something that happens while growing up, being "disobedient" because you want attention or want to be rebellious and contrary, but everything you feel IS real and it DOES hurt and nobody BELIEVES you so all you can do is yell LOUDER. its all theyll respond to. (and all it does is make people double down on what they think of you.)
wolfe is a character that is honestly kind of genuinely a bit extra, a little bit embarrassing, but very genuine. a lot of her life was spent not being able to decide what happened to her physically; just kinda pulled and prodded around whether she liked it or not; (again, the whole orphan lab experiment thing was never a lie.) and thrashing around is really all she can do about it. be inconvenient, irritating, hard to deal with; any small victory, any little foothold would do. unfortunately, most of what that's ever done is make things harder for herself. (she hates being expected to be something convenient to others, yet in her attempts to cast it away, forms her worldview to the dichotomy they set up around her. curious !)
so you have this fucked up lil thing and drop her into an lcorp facility. great superb fantastic. n then you give her some ego gear and it messes her up Big Time because guess what, her body is all sorts of fucked up and is Not reacting well with this whole thing, causing it to quite literally Stick and all those 'mild' side effects are now 'major' side effects and everyones Fussing over you again because youre an Anomaly and you Dont get any rest and youre still getting used to a body and mind that isnt Quite what it was before and you Cant leave since they need to figure out whats going on here and Oh God Fucking Damn It Its Again.
so its pretty fair that shes being Like That about the whole thing all things considered.
at this point shes just trying to make it through day by day without someone prodding her about something or another, just stop Staring at her already, fuck off. just one foot in front of the other and try not to think about it too hard. thumbsup 👍 more often than not she works alone; not just because of her own decisions, but also did you know cobalt scar gets a boost on low hp for the exchange of activating friendly fire? pretty crazy. shes kinda reckless and bound to get herself hurt anyway, so it doesnt really Change anything to just kinda.. send her out there without backup. not like she works well with others anyway, right? itd be pretty dangerous to pair her up with someone n all. yknow.
it kinda sucks, yknow? at this point shes so fucking tired of The Everything that honestly she just wants to get in and get out as quickly as possible without having to deal with any nonsense. shes still really pissed off about the entire Situation, still trying to keep any small bit of autonomy she gets to have, but like. well. sometimes it really is easier to just Do Your Job And Leave. finish your tasks and not think about it and not bother with anyone and fuck off until you have to do it again. thats how it always wouldve been anyway, right? easy. annoying. so, so annoying. god she fucking hates it here.
so anyway, rose. she sucks. she doesnt, but i have to say it every time i talk about her Or Else. shes the reason i have such a hard time talking about The Everything. and also why i had to rewrite this and take Two Days getting to it. she is just. So Much. shes an idiot. shes too smart for her own good. she would fit right in as a YA novel protagonist. this is all stalling on trying to explain what the hell is wrong with her.
honestly on a surface level shes pretty chill all things considered. mostly stays in her lane, gets along with people pretty easily, just kinda goes here, pretty good at small talk. she loves listening to people. she Loves listening to people. the problem. she isnt lying, per se, about her entire Presentation and general manner of being, but she isnt really honest either. shes disingenuous. kind of.
rose as a character is Very aware of how people act, and why they choose what they do in what situations. as such, she has gotten very good at Acting A Part rather than actually Living It. she loves listening to people because she wants to know who they are. not in a "i want to get to know my coworkers ^_^" type of way but in a "writing down all your character traits and quirks to record your habits" type of way. a weird sort of genre-awareness. she is very Very easily able to track exactly what type of person someone is and adjust the way she acts around them to... any sort of effect she wants to, honestly. mostly its just quelling dumb spats and getting people to stop being stupid like people tend to do, but every so often she isnt exactly averse to just kinda... messing with people. only a little! but she Could, if she Wanted to. which she doesnt. because shes nice.
rose sees interpersonal interaction as a complex 'game'. not by that name, but by that function. everyone always Expects something, in engaging with another, and all it really is at its core is getting what you want without giving too much ground. to figure out who the Other is without them figuring out who You are. its a competition. to understand what another person Is is what gives you the advantage. to know is to win, to be known is to lose. keep your cards as close to your chest as you can, and they cant control you. easy. its something everyone Does, but only a few acknowledge. she was just good enough to learn.
but like, admittedly, shes very chill. shes literally nice? like yeah all that but she is literally nice. shes fine. shes like... fine? shes all right. like Yeah it sounds bad when you put it like that but she is literally nice.
rose plays a lot with the idea of Symbol. shes a fully realized person, yeah, but she was never Expected to be. she exists mostly as a formality, and she knows thats all that was really expected of her. she was there to Fulfill An Ideal and little else; so she reaches for what she can when she can. be Sweet and Simple and Pretty-- that's all. and she isnt, she knows this, but it sure does make things simple when thats all people know of you. (impossible for people to dig for information people dont think exists.)
a flower in a broken vase unsure if its defined by the petals or the holes. shes someone intrinsically frustrated by the rules that define her, but is unable to comprehend a self without it. clinging to it because its the sole point of control she feels she can Have over things, but wishing to cast it aside to self realize and prove that shes worth the time of day to acknowledge. (she doesnt care what her caretakers thought of her, but still she defines her actions based on their idea of her. curious !)
so you have these two in the general vicinity of one another right.
rose initially interacts with wolfe as almost a game. a test, even. just to see if she could get anything out of the weird one that sulks in a corner by themself, refusing to interact with anyone. shes just curious, yknow? and wolfe, obviously, takes this about as well as you think she would. dont you have better things to do?? stop asking about my fucking hobbies. ..rose could always count on her for a reaction.
wolfe was very, Very resistant to playing along much at all. she thought that giving just simple brush-off responses would get her to get the hint that it wasnt worth bothering, but then rose would come back with more questions building off of whatever they'd talked about, just... idly talking at her. a frequent annoyance turning into just. consistent background noise. yeah this might as well be happening. but even still, the amount of things that rose remembered and considered and genuinely seemed to listen to kind of caught her off guard. it was... weird. it was really really weird.
it wasnt really all that hard to read what wolfe was feeling at any given moment. it was kind of funny, honestly, especially with how she tended to present herself. (honestly, how did everyone else just Miss all of this?) but after some time, rose was surprised to find that she started to just... speak to her frankly. it was stark, only every so often, almost as if she didnt realize the shift in her own tone. its around then that rose started piecing things together herself and... oh. ohh. (how did everyone just miss all of this?)
Bad News Motherfuckers! Its Fucking Over For Both Of You! wolfe finds someone who is genuinely willing to listen to her on the sole drive of simply Understanding Her, rather than wanting something in exchange, wanting something From her; and rose. god. she finds a reflection of exactly what she wishes she couldve been, things she couldve done, were she not shaped into what she Is. an understanding of something she'd never acknowledged, never knew was there, but was there with her the entire time. someone with a clear understanding of what they are, willing to fight tooth and nail to keep it, regardless of what anyone or anything else tries to do with them. things that the narrative constantly tries to take from them; things that rose wants so desperately to let wolfe keep.
so yknow, girl things. THIS is where things get really annoying.
rose seemed to enjoy messing with wolfe just for fun, but honestly shes just kinda taken by her honesty. she doesnt ever seem to have any ulterior motives when shes around her, she just… is. and does. because she wants to. rose honestly isnt really sure how to handle someone who isnt just… mildly bluffing at all times, especially about connection. that level of vulnerability is scary to her. so she teases her. she expects her being flustered-- and she is-- but still, she finds herself caught off guard by wolfe's earnestness.
even so, rose catches herself being far more open than she intends to be-- accidentally, at first, against her better judgement, but then tentatively, almost as if to test the waters. just how much could she show of herself and still uphold that trust? how many red flags can she put up before wolfe notices? no, that was unfair. before it becomes unforgivable. before it recontextualizes her. she cares, yes, genuinely and deeply so. (but what does that mean, coming from her?) she wants wolfe to be safe. (im asking you to leave.)
wolfe and rose both trust each other to a degree that they dont trust many others. its the passive understanding that theyre very much alike, and the even more silent knowledge that they want better for each other; in a roundabout way of knowing that they themselves deserved better, no matter how much they insist otherwise.
theyre very genuine with each other in a way that kind of surprises themselves. neither of them quite know what theyre doing, nor do they want to put a name to something so fleeting, but… its there.
wolfe desperately wants to be closer to rose, but hates that she desires that vulnerability. (it was always rather dangerous, showing your hand like that.) its an annoying fondness, constantly prickling at the back of her head any time rose is even remotely relevant. even when she isnt. shes kind of haunted. shes very defensive of her in a way she honestly doesnt realize until someone points it out. it just comes naturally to her. (whats the difference between a guard dog and an attack dog again..? (is she really ready to deal with the implications of this? is this not just having another will enacted on you? how does she really feel about that?))
rose, meanwhile, is… actually also conflicted. she likes wolfe. this is obvious. it wasnt intended, and she can roll with it, but it's… complicated. she handles it a lot more analytically. she notices when wolfe takes a step forward, and matches it in turn. equivalent exchange, and all. show that youve noticed, that you care, that youre paying attention. (i think she may be afraid. despite her presentation, she's afraid.)
she acknowledges the feeling of desire in this bond-- she wants wolfe to be able to live outside of others' influence. desperately. (if she cant, then…) she refuses to acknowledge what this says of Herself, though. but most importantly, she knows how easy it would be to simply take the role of someone who controls her. (isnt that just what she's always done to others?) she hates the idea of becoming that. (it would be so easy.) goes out of her way to avoid influencing her in that way-- but somehow, this just makes her more distant. hesitant to touch.
and with that fear, she tends to react, again, logically. tries to solve it like a puzzle, like she always has. finds the shortest distance to a perceived goal. this makes her rather distant, disconnected-- shes trying to control her own feelings by controlling what is around it.
what this means, most importantly, is that she is unable to trust wolfe the way She trusts her. she isnt strong enough to push back against what she sees of herself, or that which she uses to protect herself. giving in to those well-walked patterns instead of being able to brave uncertainty in something that new. she hides herself because she isnt sure what will become of her-- and is too afraid to risk what may come of losing the person she suddenly deeply cares about. setting herself up to crash harder should the worst happen. because she would simply blame herself. proving herself right.
meanwhile wolfe is dealing with Actually Trusting Someone for the first time in longer than she can remember, whether she likes it or not. maybe she was being stupid. maybe this was just a foolish foray into trusting people like she’d always told herself not to do. but… but. rose just brought this sense of comfort wherever she went, this feeling of certainty.
it was never good to let your guard down, but… but just this once, she so badly wanted to. once you let these things go, it becomes harder to get them back. she knew this. and yet, all the parts of her that protested were overruled by a deep desire to simply lie down and fall asleep in that comforting feeling. how frustrating. how annoying. how dangerous. now she had someone she could not argue against. and yet, she held this advantage as if she did not know it was one she wielded, a dangerous thing held without intent. was this trust? …did she want it to be?
and so, foolishly perhaps, she decided to trust. it was a tenuous thing, unbeknownst to anyone but herself. …probably. rose did have a way of seeing right through people. but even through all that, through the Everything… it felt nice to have someone to look out for. someone to worry about, someone on your mind when there used to be nobody else but you. she’d spent so long worrying about the repercussions of leaving your back to someone, yet she’d never known the comfort of having someone do the same to you. she’d never realized how hard it was to do much of anything with fangs bared the entire way. the ache of worry was dull compared to the weight of silence. (she would give her Everything to her. all or nothing, with her. maybe this was simply part of the inevitable problem.)
hey remember the whole turning-into-creatures thing? yeah thats still happening. crazy right? anyway. The Problem.
so you have people turning into things not quite unlike abnormalities, expressions of deep fears and desires running away with what used to be a human. and youve got some fucked up little guy with a Lot of barely repressed issues thats deceptively easy to mess with and actively averse to anybody really reaching out to them whatsoever.
and then rose is trying her best to figure out whats causing all this bullshit going on, but also her . coworker. is suddenly acting Really snappy and distant and its kinda starting to make her worried and she doesnt want to push her but shes looking really rough lately and fuck. wait. god. wait. shit.
long inhale. so you have two stupid motherfuckers 100% willing to drop everything and kill everyone in this facility and then themselves if anything so much as happens to the other (but theyre super normal about it, its fine, the other doesnt have to know.) theyre so good at this interpersonal interaction thing guys they swear (dont look too close though ok haha.) theyre sooo unknowable guys theyre really pulling a fast one on everyone here. they Definitely know what to do to fix the problem forever its fine they totally get it. dont stop them.
anyway heres a bunch of images for no reason
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tokoyamisstuff · 1 year
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Sugar Shock Ch. 1
Hotaru Haganezuka x GN! Reader
Based on this comic by @yuki2sksksk. I hope I did it justice! 💌
Might do more chapters as the comic continues. 🙃
Summary: No one - including Haganezuka himself - believed that he would ever get married, let alone be interested in it at all...
...that was until he met you, at least.
Warnings: None.
Words: 1763
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A/N: I wrote this on my phone while my baby was dozing on me and I couldn't move. 🤣Added a bit of extra plot just for fun.
Also I know the title is cheesy, leave me alone.
There was nothing special about today, he thought.
It was a day like so man others before, and still he decided it'd be the day of his proposal to you.
The peculiar swordsmith had been pining on you for a year and a half. Well, one year five months and twenty-three days to be precize. He was a man to whom details mattered, after all.
So why today, after such a long time of inaction? There was no answer to that question he asked himself.
Maybe it'd be safer for his heart to keep on admiring you from afar, occasionally stilling this irresistible urge to seek your presence by visiting your shop.
Hotaru sat up in his bed, groaning as he shook his head desperately to become clear again. But you were always there, in the corner of his mind.
The sun had yet to rise, but every single time he would try to fall asleep again was a fruitless attempt. His thoughts would always wander off to you, about how you were probably awake right now as well, already preparing the shop for your daily work.
You had a kind of dedication to your craft Haganezuka only ever saw in himself. Maybe you weren't all that different, he and you. Lonely in your passion for the only thing which in another way connected you to other people.
There it was again, this annoying pound in his chest he couldn't quite decipher. Sometimes it was a narrowing feeling however, as if he couldn't breathe and his whole body went numb.
Back then he even visited the doctor of the village, certain that it was a sign of a serious illness. It was the first time he had ever felt this way for anyone, after all, and deciphering those complex emotions sure took him a while...
...and when he realized this was what love must feel like, he became afraid. Scared of what this would make of him, that his emotions would hinder his work and the perfect concentration needed for it.
So afraid that he thought suppressing them would be easier than to find out what kind of life could await him if only he had the courage to confess.
But he was literally drawn to you like a firefly would be to the light.
Even if his love for you was no sickness, it sure felt like it - and would worsen with every day that he did not act.
Haganezuka felt like he would burst if he wouldn't finally vocalize those feelings. But if he'd make himself vulnerable like that, he'll at least go all out and instantly ask you to join him in marriage.
"Might as well get this over with."
His way to your shop led straight through the main Swordsmith Village, a crowded place he would usually go out of his way to avoid. Luckily, since it was still early, no one would bother him on his quest.
While he was strolling through the empty road, he reminisced about when exactly he began harboring those irritating emotions for you. His crush had developed slowly but steadily, just like the process of forging a sword.
Fighting it was a battle he was doomed to lose.
You on the other hand had probably forgotten already, since those acts of kindness just come natural to you. Many times before he had seen you handing out samples of candy to children or drinks to people working outside in the sun.
About two years ago you had coincidentally encountered him in the forrest.
You were collecting herbs and other ingredients needed for your work, stumbling across a sulking Haganezuka in the middle of nowhere. He had a habit of running off after he had one of his infamous tantrums, sometimes disappearing for days nowhere to be found.
Opposite to the other townsfolk which would usually scold or make fun about his behavior, you simply nodded with a smile on your face, greeting him in the silence he most likely needed.
When he failed to react you'd dare sitting down next to him, and even though his face was hidden you felt an intense stare observing you sinking onto the slightly damp grass. Your nervousness was pathetically obvious, yet not a surprising reaction.
Hotaru was used to nothing less from people that knew of his violent tendencies, so over time he had mastered the art of making it seem as if he did not care. Still, he shuffled a bit further away from you, his arms crossed in front of his chest to make him seem less of a threat.
After what felt like an eternity of silence, you took a deep breath of fresh air and rummaged into your bag, with Haganezuka eyeing you warily yet not less interested. "Here" you offered as you pulled out a single piece of mitarashi dango - his favourite. "To calm the nerves."
He snatched it out of your hand without thinking first, making you chuckle as you heared him munch quite aggressively from beneath the Hyottoko mask.
In return you had gotten a long rant about some kid that had apparently broken his sword, as well as more details about the topic of forging a Nichirin Sword than you were willing to listen to. Still, it was rather pleasant to see him so expressive for a change.
And yet: After that event Haganezuka never spoke to you again.
You'd even go so far as to say the man was actively avoiding you, always changing sides of the road or doing a quick turn whenever you'd meet in the village. Even when visited your shop, Kanamori would always accompany him and do all the talking.
And yet he would come every single day, though you deduced it was due to his weakness for sweets in general that he'd endure your presence.
When Tecchikawahara got wind of it however, he insisted that his foster son had never opened up to anyone so easily, but you brushed it off as nothing special.
Why force someone so obviously asocial into an interaction? Things were fine as they are now.
You yawned, stretching in front of the great display window as you took in the first rays of sunlight this morning. The daylight would scatter across the treetops, showing the colorful beauty of autumn.
It sure was nice living out here, in safety.
Sometimes you couldn't believe it was three years already since Kanamori had taken you with him.
Like many others that ended up affiliated with Demon Slayers, your previous life had been obliterated by one of those monsters.
Kanamori had taken sympathy in your situation back then, and offered to take you in as an apprentice. Sadly it turned out you lacked any talent for swordcrafting, so you stuck to the labor that had been passed down in your family for generations: Creating different kinds of desserts and beverages.
This way you could still be useful to the hardworking craftsmen, repaying their generosity of taking you in at your lowest point with your eternal gratitude.
And now that you had accustomed to this life, you felt a sense of normalcry. Not a home, not yet, but maybe someday.
A loud bang startled you straight out of your pondering. It was the front door that had forcefull, swung open, accented with the little bell attached to it.
"Ha-Haganezuka!"
This was certainly the last person you had expected to enter your shop before it had even properly opened. And alone for a change, since Kanamori was out of town for this day.
There was no trying to hide both the bewilderment and concern in your features when he approached you with firm steps, wordlessly towering over your much smaller form.
Quite taken aback by the sudden proximity, you gulped before reminding yourself he is still a customer. And it would be impolite to just remain like this - since as far as you knew him, he wasn't going to initiate a conversation anyway.
"Good morning!" you cheered as you put up your most welcoming smile, "What can I help you with?"
And just like that, everything he had come up with in his mind had vanished into thin air.
Good for him that he was wearing his mask like he always would, otherwise his intentions would be as clear as daylight. He could only guess, but from the heat that was radiating off of his face, it was most likely bright red at this point.
"C'mon, say something...remember what you came here to do!"
Hotaru's words had now completely failed him, and he could see the gears in your head turn the longer he would remain staring at you without making a single sound.
Every single time he saw you it was comparable to the ecstasis of having finished yet another masterpiece of a sword.
And just like those blades, you were immaculate.
He flinched at the inevitable rejection that awaited him, only now wondering why he would even consider asking for your hand when he knew he could consider himself lucky if you'd even hear him out.
All of this seemed way easier when he went through it in his head.
You rose an eyebrow at the strange man, but quickly regained your composure. "If you want to buy sweets, you have to wait until I can open the store properly..."
The only answer was a shake of his head. Alright then.
"No?" Oh, now you got it. "Did you come to see Kanamori? He's still spending time with his wife, but he told me they'll be back before noon."
Another frantic head-shake.
What then?!
It's alright that he doesn't like smalltalk, or you, or both. But how should you know why he's here when he is making this way harder than it has to be?
"Stay polite, Y/N, pick your fights wisely..." this man has quite a temper and poor anger management skills, you wouldn't wanna provoke him.
"Haha" you chuckled halfheartedly, more fake than anything. "Are you here to see me? Oh my, I feel like I'm about to be court."
You snorted, this time for real as you imagined this hilarious scenario. Haganezuka, liking you? To be perfectly honest, while he's certainly loyal to the village and it's inhabitants, he seemed rather neutral about anything besides his craft. "Just kidding-"
"Yes."
Huh?
HUH?!????!?
You thought to have misunderstand, but instead of correcting your joke Haganezuka balled his fists, as if bracing himself before repeating his declaration. It was now or never.
"Yes, Y/N, I am courting you."
[Next chapter]
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bugs1nmybrain · 2 years
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Aizawa Shouta x Bipolar! Reader
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This post hits a little home for me because I’ve struggled with bipolar disorder (specifically type 1 with psychosis) and it’s impacted my life significantly. I hardly ever see any fanfics regarding bipolar disorder so I wanted to contribute and give people with this condition recognition.
Warnings: Mentions of major mental illness; mania, depression, suicidality, psychotic symptoms (hallucinations, delusions, paranoia)
At the beginning of your relationship, he doesn’t know a lot about what it means to be bipolar. Once you open up to him about your disorder, he’ll do some research on his phone to understand it better. But he mostly likes to hear about what it’s like from you because not one person is the same
When you’re experiencing a depressive episode, he does his best to comfort you. He’ll let you vent about why you’re so down. He encourages you to push through it, but he won’t force you. He doesn’t expect you to be perfect, but he can’t just watch you lay in bed all day. 
On those particularly hard days when you can’t manage to move a muscle, he’ll cuddle you for comfort. He’ll try to get you to come out of your room with him, even if it’s just to eat or watch tv with him.
If you get to the point that you’re feeling suicidal, he’ll pay extra attention to you and keep means of harm out of the house. He will not hesitate to bring you to the hospital if it gets serious. It sucks, but he the last thing he wants is for you to hurt yourself. He needs to know that you’re safe
Aizawa finds it a bit harder to know what to do when you’re manic
He’s a lot more patient with you than someone would assume. Sure, he gets a little irritated when he can’t manage to get through to you, but he knows this isn’t something you really have control over and doesn’t get upset with you about it
When you’re not getting any sleep, he’ll pretty much force you to lay in bed with him. Even if you’re still watching tv or using your phone. He just wants you to rest in some form.
He feels kind of lost when you’re all over the place, whether that’s cleaning vigorously or doing all kinds of different projects that you probably won’t finish. He tries to look at things a little more rationally. Sure, you’re all over the place. But you’re being productive and making all kinds of cool stuff. 
He’ll try to bring you back down to earth. When you’re talking a mile a minute, he’s kind of mean about it. “I can’t understand you, you need to slow down.”
Will talk you out of making impulsive decisions and spending too much money. Tells you that it’s not logical at all and it’s only going to negatively affect you no matter how energized or happy you may be feeling
He WILL give it to you straight if you get agitated at him. He knows that whatever you’re saying you probably don’t actually mean, but he’s not going to let you walk all over him.
Like I said, he’s patient, he’s just not going to baby you
Below is for psychosis symptoms. I know this doesn’t apply to everyone who’s bipolar, but it does for me and I really need the comfort lmao
If you start experiencing more severe symptoms, he’s a lot more gentle because he knows you’re not healthy and that you really can’t control anything that’s happening
If you’re having hallucinations, he won’t lecture you and do the whole, “that’s not there,” shit. More on the lines of, “what is it that you’re seeing? What does it look like?”
Delusions are a little more frustrating for him because he knows there’s nothing he can say that’s going to change your mind. He’ll just hear you out and try to see the patterns in your delusions and see if he can see rationally why you believe those things.
Again, he’s not going to tell you that you’re wrong or everything you think isn’t true, because that doesn’t help. He’ll talk to you about it. He makes sure to meet you at your level. 
If you start having persecutory delusions regarding him, that’s when he gets the most frustrated. It hurts him that you’d think he’d ever try to harm you
Honestly, it’ll probably end with him taking you to the hospital because there’s nothing he can really do on his end other than support you. He’ll call you while you’re in the hospital to check on you and ask you how your treatment is going. If possible, he’ll have regular contact with your providers so they have someone who can advocate 
He encourages you to take your medication and will regularly ask if you’ve taken them that day. He can be annoying about it
He loves you and your disorder doesn’t change that for him. It can be confusing for him, but he’s made a commitment to be there for you in those times.
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landofzero-archive · 1 year
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Rouge&Ruby - The Circumstances of the Second Month 6
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(Location: Staff dining hall)
Hiyori: (…… Woah. Jun-kun raised an unexpected objection.)
Nagisa: (…… Such a thing, it’s an unexpected development isn't it? This is the first time.)
Hiyori: (Let’s keep an eye on it. I’m curious as to how Ibara will react……)
Ibara: …… It’s exactly as I described. Their wishes aren’t something I can easily ignore.
Jun: I know that. I wouldn’t say anything either if you were enthusiastic about it.
Even with my lacking brain, I understand the circumstances Ibara explained.
But in reality, even though you should have a leg in with “those guys” you’re complaining like this, aren’t you?
Ibara has so much passion for Chocolat Fes…
Even if you extend your hand out through COMP to impress the upper management, you’ll be the one who bears the brunt of those greedy people, you know.
Ibara: …… Things like that are my role as deputy director.
Jun: As Ohiisan said, COMP was already finished when we completed shooting the promotional video.
I don’t know much about plans and schedules…… But I’m sure there’ll be more opportunities to spend the budget.
Wouldn’t it be nice if we could just send our love to all our fans on Valentine’s Day?
We’ll do our best for the sake of the feelings you poured into Chocolat Fes.
Then I’m sure Eden’s performance will be a good one. No, I’ll make it the best it can be.
If we make it the best performance possible, then I’m sure it’ll naturally have a good impact……
Um, that’s why……
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Ibara: ………
Jun: The extra budget from COMP probably wasn’t there when you first started thinking about Chocolat Fes.
But because of it, it’ll have a positive impact on CosPro’s schools and the planning was left to Ibara.
Honestly, don’t you think it’s ridiculous?
Ibara: …… You’re out of line. Your remarks are being said for your own sake.
Jun: Just in case, I’ll check around.
Such a thing that can be done through the power of money…… No, it’s done through Ibara’s power……
I don’t know, I think it’s too good to be true……
Jun and Ibara: ………
Nagisa: (…… Jun surely has a lot to say. He’s working hard to come up with the words.)
Hiyori: (But he’s stumbling because he started talking before he could gather his thoughts.
He doesn’t want to say anything ill of Ibara, it’s frustrating to listen to……)
Nagisa: (…… That part too, Ibara must have been able to understand it. Compared to his usual tone, his words seem much more frustrated.)
Jun: …… I know there are circumstances and compromises I don’t understand.
But I listened to Ibara. There’s still some frustrating parts, but I trust Ibara’s way of doing things, and I thought it was good……
Only this time, a horizontal spear called COMP was inserted into things.
If it’s difficult it’s only going to give you a headache. I’m saying let’s compete with only your plan and our abilities.
And…… Valentine’s Day is an event filled with love and kindness.
That’s why I think there’s no need for speculation here.
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Ibara: Filled with love……?
(For me, Valentine’s Day is a sales season— a competition. It’s a fierce battle where businesses clash with each other.
The phrase “an event filled with love and kindness” has no place there.
Even though I’ve been saying things like benevolence, fraternity, and so on a lot lately… Emotionally, it’s hard to understand—and then they throw it at me.)
…… How irritating.
Jun: Huh? Just now, what’d you say?
Ibara: I don’t know what kind of Valentine’s Day is “filled with love.”
It’s quicker and easier to spend the money wisely and make a good impression for ES and the upper management in the process than to understand such things.
Jun: But……!
Ibara: …… However, I’ve received your opinion. If I can’t even convince Jun then it’s an issue.
I don’t think it’ll help things if we keep exchanging words here— so, I’d like to ask for some space.
I will contact you later on. …… Excuse me.
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xokohaneazusawa · 2 months
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Hihi!! May I join the Match Up Event? <3
I would like to choose Blue lock please for the fandom! (Apologies if my request is awkward since this is my first time.)
Description:
I prefer to be called Aer and my pronouns go by she/her.
My hobbies are Painting, baking and volleyball! Though, I like to do volleyball the most.
Hmm... For my likes-
I would say sweet foods! I do also tend to like flowers and hang out with my friends even if it's just a simple walk or just sitting together on the couch.
For my Dislikes...
I absolutely dislike being in dark quiet areas, and journal writing! I get too impatient with writing since my thoughts can't keep up.
I did the personality test 2 times to make sure and I got ENFJ and ENFP!
I'll try describing my personality ^^
I'm a mix between a yapper and listener, and I tend to get more energetic when I'm with people I know. I'm a bit of a overthinker but I'm completely honest in my opinions! It does get me panicking though if I feel like If what I said hurt the person I'm talking to.
I don't like to fight or get competitive a lot for myself, I just brush it off and continue on with my day. But I like to do petty revenge and do it passively ✨
I'm waiting for karma to happen type of person. (Though I will get aggressive if it's a continuous type of fighting since when I get irritated it's over. Literally.)
I'm a wary person and try to keep note of everything despite me being quite forgetful on basic stuff.
I'm quite good at making friends! Since I'm quite good at adjusting and adapting since I love acting in dramas.
My love language is a mix of Gift giving/acts of service and physical touch.
I have medium length brown hair and almond shaped brown eyes! ^^ my cheeks are a lil chubby and I stand around 5'4.
My aesthetic, I don't really have one TT I Tend to go on the Casual style and I wear more colourful outfits, so you barely see me wearing black. I like to go for mellow or pastel colours! I wear blue a lot too. (Turtle necks on top for me 🗣️ or big shirts with a nice looking print)
For extras hmm..
so I'm literally a person who goes head over heels once confirmed if they love me. ILL LITERALLY SPOIL THEM ✨
I also like to collect pins, and listen if they're so cute or cool. I just 🤺🤺
If there's anything I need to fix please do tell me since this is my first time! ^^
I think you'd look good with...
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Bachira Meguru!
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-> Starting off, y'all's hobbies match up really well! You both play sports, and he already has quite a bit of background in painting because of his mother! He loves being able to practice with you, even if you don't play the same sport. He'll try to teach you a little bit (if you're up for it) so you guys can play a 1 on 1, and in turn he'll learn your sport so he can play your sport with you as well. -> Loves being able to hang out with you, and even your friends once in a while! His favorite season is summer, which is when all the flowers are in bloom. So he'll take you to either places around town he knows where the flowers bloom so that you can see them, or in winter he'll try to find a indoor flower garden around the place so you're still able to enjoy them. -> Doesn't seem the type to love dark places either, but luckily when he has you around you're most of the time talking, so you never have to worry about it being super quiet! -> Overthinker x Never worried about things type relationship! He is also part yapper and part listener so he'll match up with you perfectly, he'll totally let you go on and on as long as at some point you'll also let him yap your ear off! -> Loves the petty revenge stuff, maybe won't outright say it, but he does think it's pretty funny when you just wait and Karma comes to bite that person in the ass -> Bachira probably met you due to the fact you were good at making friends! I mean you seem to be a very extroverted person and matched with the fact that you like a colorful style of outfits that drew him to you to start with! -> Loves the fact that you like gifting people things. It always makes him feel special when you give him something, no matter how small! It's always the thought that counts for him! Same with the acts of service, he doesn't always expect it, but he really does feel your love when you either help or do things for him, especially if he really doesn't wanna do them!
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Other potential matchups - Hiori Yo and Isagi Yoichi
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munsons-maiden · 2 years
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you know with the whole ‘oh eddie is /horrible/ for selling drugs to teenagers’ debate thing going on i just have to say… i frankly, as a fellow poor person who grew up under similar circumstances, personally do not care that the guy who lives in a one bedroom moldy trailer with his uncle and drives a 15 year old van sells weed (and occasionally special k or probably like, fucking ritalin or something).
he’s not the cartel. hell, it doesn’t even seem like he’s all that active about it– like you pointed out he doesn’t even know where the special k is at first. if he was a rich character doing it for funsies i could see the irritation. but this is a poor trailer park kid risking arrest to maybe make some extra cash to help out the man who raised him so i really don’t care.
(i would even argue that jason basically encouraging a bunch of underaged teens, including a 15 year old, to get wasted is worse that selling an 18 year old weed or special k, but that rarely ever seems to be brought up.)
idk. there’s probably some bias there but in the end they’re fictional characters so..
“He’s not the cartel” and my brain immediately conjured up this gem of a shot:
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I agree with everything you said. The writers have gone out of their way to show us:
1. why he deals drugs: he's poor (as you said, he lives in a trailer with mold in the corner of his bedroom ceiling, he drives an old van, and he didn’t seem to have had money for lunch during the cafeteria scene. He was eating pretzels while the rest of Hellfire had actual lunch and judging by the way he was munching through the food supplies at the boathouse it wasn’t because he wasn’t hungry), had an unstable or even abusive home life before he came to live with Wayne, and his hobbies music and D&D are expensive ones so he needs money. One could even argue that had he applied for a normal side job: a) he's a metalhead in rural Hawkins. Would anybody have employed him with how he looks? b) from what Robin and Steve say in their conversation in season 3, they earn “three bucks an hour” so...selling drugs pays way better.
2. what kind of drugs he deals: mainly weed, occasionally Special K. Maybe Ritalin, that stuff, as you said. Definitely no hard drugs. Or do people think the “I swore to myself I wouldn’t wind up like he did“ Eddie said about his dad was only about hotwiring cars?? 😂
3. that he doesn’t push those drugs on anyone.
People going around saying Eddie dealing drugs makes him a bad person is a) incredibly classist and b) absolutely tone deaf and proof of media illiteracy at its finest. And if the reasons you and me summed up aren’t enough to silence the “he’s selling drugs he’s so evil” argument: do these people really think the Duffers would have made Eddie Dustin’s pal and hyped him up if Eddie’s intentions at any point had been ill or malicious or if he simply didn't care about others?
And the thing about Jason, YES.
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