#it’s still added to the original post so I mean

[subjectsix]

KIP'S BIG POST OF THINGS TO MAKE THE INTERNET & TECHNOLOGY SUCK A LITTLE LESS

Post last updated November 23, 2024. Will continue to update!

Here are my favorite things to use to navigate technology my own way:

A refurbished iPod loaded with Rockbox OS (Rockbox is free, iPods range in price. I linked the site I got mine from. Note that iPods get finicky about syncing and the kind of cord it has— it may still charge but might not recognize the device to sync. Getting an original Apple cord sometimes helps). Rockbox has ports for other MP3 players as well.

This Windows debloater program (there are viable alternatives out there, this one works for me). It has a powershell script that give you a little UI and buttons to press, which I appreciate, as I'm still a bit shy with tech.

Firefox with the following extensions: - Consent-O-Matic (set your responses to ALL privacy/cookie pop-ups in the extension, and it will answer all pop-ups for you. I can see reasons to not use it, but I appreciate it) - Facebook Container ("contains" Meta on Facebook and Instagram pages to keep it from tracking you or getting third party cookies, since Meta is fairly egregious about it) - Redirect Amp to HTML (AMP is designed for mobile phones, this forces pages to go to their HTML version) - A WebP/AVIF image converter - uBlock Origin and uBlacklist, with the AI blacklist loaded in to kill any generative AI results from appearing in search engines or anywhere.

Handbrake for ripping DVDs— I haven’t used this in awhile as I haven’t been making video edits. I used this back when I had a Mac OS

VLC Media Player (ol’ reliable)

Unsplash & Pexels for free-to-use images

A password manager (these often are paid. I use Dashlane. There are many options, feel free to search around and ask for recs!). There is a lot that goes into cybersecurity— find the option you feel is best for you.

Things I suggest:

Understanding Royalty Free and the Creative Commons licenses

Familiarity with boolean operators for searching

Investing in a backup drive and external drive

A few good USBs, including one that has a backup of your OS on it

Adapter cables

Avoiding Fandom “wikias” (as in the brand “Fandom”) and supporting other, fan-run or supported wikis. Consider contributing if its something you find yourself passionate or joyful about.

Finding Forums for the things you like, or creating your own*

Create an email specifically for ads/shopping— use it to receive all promotional emails to keep your inbox clean. Upkeep it.

Stop putting so much of your personal information online— be willing to separate your personal online identity from your “online identity”. You don’t owe people your name, location, pronouns, diagnoses, or any of that. It’s your choice, but be discerning in what you give and why. I recommend avoiding providing your phone number to sites as much as possible.

Be intentional

Ask questions

Talk to people

Remember that you can lurk all you want

Things that are fun to check out:

BBSes-- here's a portal to access them.

Neocities

*Forums-- find some to join, or maybe host your own? The system I was most familiar with was vbulletin.

MMM.page

Things that have worked well for me but might work for you, YMMV:

Limit your app usage time on your smartphone if you’re prone to going back to them— this is a tangible way to “practice mindfulness”, a term I find frustratingly vague ansjdbdj

Things I’m looking into:

The “Pi Hole”— a raspberry pi set up to block all ads on a specific internet connection

VPNs-- this is one that was recommended to me.

How to use computers (I mean it): Resources on how to understand your machine and what you’re doing, even if your skill and knowledge level is currently 0:

This section I'll come back an add to. I know that messing with computers can be intimidating, especially if you feel out of your depth. HTML and regedits and especially things like dualbooting or linux feel impossible. So I want to put things here that explain exactly how the internet and your computer functions, and how you can learn and work with that. Yippee!

[greenplumbboblover]

[WIP] Lyralei's Pose addon - Part 2

(See previous post: Click me!)

First things first, MASSIVE thanks to @thesweetsimmer111 for all the help to make this work better and sharing her knowledge on Track masks with me (and the world!)

👀 Better Look at (with reactions!)

Maybe it’s just me, but I used to get endlessly frustrated when Sims wouldn’t properly turn their heads to face an item. So, I set out on a little mission to make their head movements more natural! Unfortunately, that didn’t go as planned—turns out EA’s code for the “Look At” feature is completely deprecated and no longer functional.

Knowing I couldn’t just code a fix, I had to explore other approaches. That’s when @thesweetsimmer111 came up with a brilliant solution: blending left, right, up, and down poses to create a more convincing look-at effect! 🎉

(See: Post)

What's different?

Here's the original pose, without Look at turned on....

On the left, we got VA's original look at.

On the right is what Savanita and I came up with! :)

don’t want to make it seem like the original Look At feature was awful—it actually works pretty well in some cases! For example, in this pose, if the plant were on the other side, the difference wouldn’t be that noticeable since her head is already tilted slightly. 😊

(Same layout again: Left = VA's, Right = Me and Savanita's approach)

Plus, maybe you do want something more subtle, then VA's Look at is great!

Anyways! Of course, I couldn't stop there! Now, your sim has a few options of turning towards the object:

(Note, this list will get 10x cooler in the next feature ;D)

This list is what the "trackmasks" are. :)

Okay, let's give "Eyes Only" a try. So, we expect Morgana to ONLY look at the plant, with her eyes.

(Left is before using look at, Right is with look at, and one up for fun-cies)

And, to please @nocturnalazure's wishes, yep! It now accepts Facial Expressions! :D

(I never would've thought I would see Evil Morgana lmao)

🎭Blending Poses/Reactions

After Savanita's amazing idea of using Track Masks, I found out that I can apply that same technique on, well, poses! And this is a feature I'm SUPER proud of (And honestly, it's taken me an entire week to get working 🙃)

First things first, when we choose the interaction, we will first be greeted by our "trackmask" list with all the selections on it

So, I made a few examples to show of what you could do, but in all fairness, it's endless!

Here I chose the option "Both Arms".

Here I chose "Head And Neck". Look! She even has the expression! (Don't worry though, i also have an expression-less version in the making ;))

What about... Animations?!

While blending poses has the ability to also type in your pose names by name, rather than list, you can also use EA's!

The list is pretty long ( believe 200 entries?) but here is a sneak peek:

Though, as far as I've been able to tell, EA reactions aren't as flexible, where I can tell it to only use the arms, or the eyes. Instead, we got these options:

So, unless I found a way to get around it, this is the only way to do it.

But without further ado....

Here I used the same pose(left) as the last 2 pictures, but with "OverlayHead". And chose "Boo"

(I just realised it looks like she is about to get hit by a ball lol)

🕰️ History List

The Add-on now remembers your pose history!

Whether you’re a dedicated “Pose by Name” user or prefer the simplicity of “Show by List”, both options now display your pose history for quick reference.

Note: Each Sim has their own individual history list. This means you’ll only see the pose history for Sim X when clicking on them, and not for Sim Y.

📓What's up next?

Adding all the trackmask. (I still need add the hands and legs ones)

Adding an in-game Category maker, so you don't have to edit the XML. It will mean you need to replace the XML file in S3PE yourself. But I can always make a quick How-To for guidance 😉

(Note to self) Optimize the Categorisation code. It's currently taking 1 minute up from the loading screen 😬)

Fixing some minor bugs where Look at will still turn the sim's head back to it's original position.

Fixing some issues where Blending poses with certain track masks aren't working well or at all.

Fixing an issue where the dialogs can crash the whole game (woops!)

Sooo, I think a release date is pretty soon! I think within a week :)

Any VA Addon Bug Fixes?

Of course! It's the mod that inspired me to make stories, and even get to make this mod! I couldn't just... leave it to collect dust while it's other child mod is getting all the attention. :p

Changelog:

There is now an interaction that uses both look at & reaction simultaneously. (In case you don't want to use my look at interaction).

Fixed an issue where reactions would sometimes or never show on the sim.

Fixed an issue where using "Random Quick Poses" would occasionally show a breathing sim, doing nothing.

Fixed an issue where certain poses get called twice, making it harder to keep reactions or even look at history data.

Some minor code changes that aren't worth mentioning honestly.

[morethanroommates]

What's coming AFTER Arcane? I have some thoughts...

ACT 3 SPOILERS! The show is out, but I know not everyone has been able to see it yet. This post is a long one, but I have a bunch of images inline with my analysis to support my hypotheses.

....

In the episode 9 epilogue, we see a three-eyed raven pecking at some arcane-corrupted rubble.

This raven is almost certainly one of Swain's Demon Ravens, which serve as his eyes and ears. Who is Swain? Oh, just the warlord leader of Noxus.

Meanwhile, the next scene shows us Caitlyn and Vi after an unknown amount of time has passed since the attack.

Caitlyn is sporting a fancy eyepatch. Fetch!

She's reviewing and adding to the Kiramman archives. As she does so, she gently holds part of one of Jinx's detonated monkey bombs. Her expression looks pensive and reflective.

A few of the archive's frames show documentation and schematics for Hexgates. I think Hextech isn't totally out of the picture for Piltover in the future. But Caitlyn isn't rash. The writers are showing us the info in the archives so that we know the technology isn't lost, even if its creators are missing or presumed dead.

Edit: After reading others' analysis, it's possible Caitlyn is looking at the schematics and seeing the ducts that Jinx could have hidden in to escape the explosion. The monkey bomb and Caitlyn's smile could indicate that. It's at least hinted that Jinx might not be dead. There's another edit lower down on the same topic.

Caitlyn overhears Vi's solemnly humming and is drawn to her.

And we cut to see Vi sitting by the fire in an expansive, dimly lit room.

Caitlyn joins Vi by the fire and remarks on her singing. Vi tells her it's a tune her mother used to sing... She appears to be at the beginning of her healing, embracing the beauty in the things she's lost. And she's lost so much.

And then Caitlyn rests her head on Vi's shoulder and asks her, "Are you still in this fight, Violet?" She calls Vi by her full name... This, plus the other reciprocated physical closeness in this scene, shows a deep level of intimacy, trust, and realism that we haven't yet seen between them until now.

Vi reassures her, she's here and she's not going anywhere, using a very Vi metaphor.

And then Vi rests her shoulder on Caitlyn, reciprocating the physical gesture Cait did to Vi earlier in the scene.

But what fight is Caitlyn alluding to? Sure, it could be a metaphorical reference to the dedication to their relationship. I think the writers intentionally implied that.

However...I think there's a -real- fight coming. In the last frame of Caitlyn and Vi together, Cait looks emotionally touched by Vi's reassurances and trust. AND...she looks determined. She's committed to Vi and to whatever is coming next...

WAIT... WHAT... WHAT'S COMING NEXT?

Well...let's go back to Swain's three-eyed raven and newly introduced antagonists: Mel's sister and the Black Rose organization. What do Swain, Mel's sister, and Black Rose all have in common?

Noxus.

With one of Swain's Demon Ravens appearing and Mel exposing her sister's duplicity in the last episode, we have a solid setup for a future installment of a League of Legends story arc. It's very likely that Mel's sister is a woman named LeBlanc, a very powerful and manipulative magic user from Noxus that can impersonate anyone.

In League of Legends lore, Noxus is regularly invading other nations. Caitlyn's father is originally from Ionia, so perhaps Cait, Vi, and Mel will go there to investigate.

In the fancy airship, because they're not using Hexgates.

OMFG... Does this mean we might get more Cait and Vi???

Let's GOOOOO!!!!!

Thanks for making it this far! What do you think? Are we getting more Cait and Vi in a new series?

Edit: Some have speculated that the airship could signify that Jinx is still alive and that's she's on it and leaving Piltover to go somewhere else in Runterra. That doesn't rule out the story continuing in Ionia or Demacia nor Cait and Vi being involved. I stand by my analysis of Caitlyn's comment about "this fight" being more than asking Vi if she's committed to their relationship.

[seastarblue]

Some Questions…

so I was thinking about some of the questions that @creators-club posted yesterday (here) and… idk I just wanna answer some <3 specifically for Harper because this is HIS WEEK and I didn’t give him his DUE ATTENTION!

———

So here they are! Just a few:

What’s a little-known fact about your main character’s past?

Something Harper never tells the others (no not even Noha) is the fact that he isn’t Niali-born. Everyone assumes he is, because his language is really good, he has no accent (at least one from another area) , and he doesn’t stand out too much. But he’s not Niali-born.

What inspired your character’s name, and does it have a deeper meaning?

So, Harper’s name was originally a placeholder while I found a better one. I uh. I liked Harper a lot more than I’d like to admit, and now that’s his name yay <3

I think it suits him! Harps are an instrument, and Harper loves music!

What’s an angst headcanon that isn’t explicitly stated in your story?

Something that’s never shown in Interwoven is that Harper has eating issues. I won’t go into detail, but sometimes he binges (as a result of never having enough) and then feels bad and doesn’t eat.

Share a line or an excerpt that shows a character’s deepest fear.

I think I’ll rewrite this one soon, but mainly Harper fears talking about his past. He was small. He doesn’t like being small. Tw for eating gross stuff.

Take what you can get. That was the first rule the boy learned about street urchin life. So now he sat crouched in an alleyway grimer than his once-curly hair. In his tiny, scruffy hands he held a partially-decayed orange. He stared at the mold and dirt on the fruit, and gulped. His stomach growled in response to his nausea. With a shudder, the orange passed his lips and he swallowed before his gag reflex could protest. His stomach still growled, seemingly louder this time. The boy simply sighed and wrapped his oversized coat closer against his too-thin body to stay warm. 

"...Yeah, not really my proudest moment, but hey, you take what you can get, right?" Harper said, shrugging on his fitting coat, then added, "Besides, I've eaten worse and lived, so I'm fine. Really." Yet despite his reassurances otherwise, he still did not make eye contact with a rightfully concerned Noha, and simply walked out the door without another word.

———

phew anyways I’ll tag @bardic-tales , @bunnymermaidwrites , @glbettwrites , @thebookishkiwi , and @annothersummerofsleep bc Harps ✨

I hope yall enjoyed <3

[katboykirby]

Okay 🤷

I'm coming from the standpoint of someone who has both worked in the mobile game industry on the writing/game development side of things, and also as someone who personally knows and regularly speaks to staff at Solmare. All I'm doing is offering the perspective that comes with having that experience.

You personally seeing lots of posts about a particular topic, because it's a popular point of discussion in your circle, does not mean that the topic is popular or widely discussed outside of your circle. I'm not saying that no one is having these discussions, but I absolutely promise you that it's not as many people as you seem to think. And like, that's fine? Not sure why that's even an issue or anything, but okay?

Again, "this is badly written" is completely subjective. Your personal opinion on a piece of media is obviously fine, but it's not in any way universal or objective. To be honest, it's kind of a weird choice to even bring up because (in addition to it's subjectivity) it's simply not all that related to the original point that was being discussed? This specific post is about people being upset over optional monetization in the game, not about story quality. That's absolutely a conversation that can happen, but it's not the point of THIS post?

I don't know where I've been defending Solmare? In my original post I literally outlined multiple points of feedback and criticism, and examples of what I think they could have done differently and what they can still stand to improve. I also link directly to the contact page for their Support Team specifically so people can easily send their own feedback.

Ultimately, my main point was this: the new feature isn't perfect and Solmare could have done several things differently that would have improved the rollout and made people happier. BUT, it's also not the atrocious garbage fire that people are treating it as. There's harassment and abuse being sent to the official OM accounts, multiple people are saying that "everyone should boycott Solmare" and just overreacting in general. Which is a lot of drama over what is, essentially, a pretty standard and inoffensive item bundle being added to the shop.

The new feature is very normal for live service mobage (especially gacha) and "optional paid bonus content" is EXTREMELY common in this genre of games. In-app purchases for goodies and extra fluff exist in basically every gacha game ever, and OM isn't doing anything different. Obviously it's totally okay to not like it! And if you don't like it, you can just totally ignore it. It doesn't impact the game either way.

You're paying $30 and getting a long Devilgram story, a character phone call, exclusive premium artwork, and a stack of 300 DP on top. That's all. It's not mandatory, it doesn't lock any actual game progression or Main Story behind a paywall. It's just a totally optional goodie bag in the shop that you can completely ignore if you don't want to buy it. It's more than fair to criticise the pricing scheme, but some players are acting like the gave devs personally hacked into their bank accounts and stole their life savings.

Anyway, I'm probably not gonna keep replying like this because this post has gotten ridiculously long, lol. You're more than welcome to DM me if you wanna keep discussing stuff, but I might just disable reblogs because I wasn't expecting this post to get so much attention.

Going to play Devil's Advocate (ha) here for a moment, as someone who has experience working in the industry & game development:

Remember, every single time that any new feature is added to the game (even if that new feature is "just a new artwork and phone call") it means that Solmare is -

Paying artists for the new artwork

Paying writers for the new scripts

Paying the voice actors to record the new voice lines

Paying the game devs, coders, debuggers, etc, to actually implement the new feature into the game without breaking anything

Paying for QA

Paying the translators for all the different language versions (Obey Me is currently available in 4 different languages)

Paying the localisers for all different language versions

Etc, etc

This is all on top of the monthly costs of keeping a live service mobage like OM running smoothly. Anything that isn't paid for by the players is being operated at a loss. This isn't a flaw with OM itself, this is a fact that exists on an industry-wide level.

Secondly, while any concerns about the price are entirely valid, I think that a lot of people are glossing over an important point - Solmare is not charging you $30 for a Date Ticket. Solmare is charging $30 for a BUNDLE, which includes the Date Ticket as well as 300 DP. So this is similar to all the other sales bundles that have been rolled out in the past.

And the price is consistent with the standard price for DP in Akuzon. It has always been about $30 for 300 DP, so the price has not actually changed or been increased. This is an optional, $30 bundle for 300 DP that essentially includes the Date Ticket as a bonus for free.

You're totally justified if you don't want to spend $30 on this. I'm definitely not arguing that. While I think that this feature isn't as bad as some people are saying (I never would have expected any new features to be totally free) I do think that Solmare could have rolled this out in a better way than they did.

I think that most, if not all, of the complaints would disappear if they simply offered different bundles for different price tiers. This is something they've already done in the past, even! Just give people alternatives, like...

$1.39 for the Date Ticket by itself

$10 for 100 DP + Date Ticket

$20 for 200 DP + Date Ticket

$30 for 300 DP + Date Ticket

And so on. I think this probably would have alleviated many people's concerns, and would have made the new feature more accessible for more players.

Now, I don't think that harassing the official Twitter account is the way to go about communicating your thoughts. There's a difference between genuine constructive criticism/feedback given in good faith, and needlessly rude hate comments. "Fuck you, hope your game goes broke" doesn't help anybody, and will only make Solmare less likely to listen to the EN fandom. They've dealt with a lot of harassment from Western fans before, including death threats, and you aren't communicating anything useful or constructive by sending hate to the EN social media account.

Solmare has a Support team that you can email, if you have feedback and you actually want to reach the JP game devs. If you want to let them know that you want other/more affordable options for the new Date Ticket feature, this is the best way to do that. Just remember to be civil, since harassment and hate mail are extremely likely to simply be thrown out before it reaches the hands of anyone in charge.

[ashipiko]

“Oi! Don’t forget that I’m considered responsible for this!”

NIKO CIMARRON’S GROOVIED SR! his groovy lines have been updated!

😔 ok who threw that water balloon at him…….. and WHO THREW THAT PAWPSICLE IN HIS FACE?

[mllenugget]

Hey remember when Baghera adopted Dapper like 8 months ago or did I make that up ? ────────────────────────────────────────── Support all the admins that spoke out (& do your daily click) ──────────────────────────────────────────

[choco-1601]

A lil john doodle/sketch 🌺

Flower gifted by arthur

[sysig]

Some possible* Tala stickers :D (Patreon)

[blobbei-art]

Comparing studies from 2017 vs 2019 vs 2020 vs 2022

I’ve recently been reflecting on my artistic progress with how far I’ve come especially since I hated that 2017 drawing and thought I’d never be able to do art studies

[vocaloid-song-showdown]

the poll for how to arrange the brackets just finished with proceeding as originally planned winning!

so, without further ado, here are the lineups ^^

note :: songs with a * next to them may require a content warning. i'll provide specific warnings as soon as i have the time, but as of now please proceed with caution

main matchup bracket ::

alice of human sacrifice* by yugami p / fear garden* by chaa

magnet by minato p / romeo and cinderella by doriko

world is mine by ryo / world's end dancehall by wowaka

triple baka by lamaze p / the disappearance of hatsune miku by cosmo p

meltdown by iroha(sasaki) / luka luka★night fever by samfree

fire◎flower by halyosy / trick and treat by oster project

daughter of evil by mothy / dancing★samurai by kanimiso p

rolling girl by wowaka / matryoshka by hachi

madness of duke venomania* by mothy / alluring secret ~black vow~ by hitoshizuku x yama

senbonzakura by kurousa / outer science by jin

doubleganger by kulfiq / mikusabbath by utsu p

jinsei reset button by kemu / common world domination by pinnochio p

the fox's wedding* by masa works design / tokio funka by takamatt

heat haze days by jin / patchwork staccato by toa

six trillion years and an overnight story by kemu / lost one's weeping by neru

aishite aishite aishite by kikuo / echo by crusher p

setsuna drive by taki yoshimitsu / yoake to hotatu by n buna

a fake fake psychotropic by kairiki bear / therefore you and me by tadanoco

my r* by kurage p / i'm glad youre evil too by pinnochio p

chururira chururira dadada by kurage p / mkdr by deco*27

blessed messiah and the tower of ai by hitoshizuku x yama / 86 by dasu

law evading rock by neru / nakakapagpabagabag by dasu

sand planet by hachi / ghost rule by deco*27

monster by kira / hated by life itself by iori kanzaki

cause i'm a liar by mcki robyns p / honey i'm home by ghost

hole dwelling by kikuo / bring it on by giga

meteor by divela / seraphim on the ring by mitchie m

the court jester by thquib / casino by azari

king by kanaria / villain by teniwoha

lower by lanndo / phony by tsumiki

higanbana milk tea by vane / scapegoat by ghost

queen by kanaria / bug by kairiki bear

honorable mention bracket ::

electric angel by yasuo p (original), giga (giga arrange) / freely tomorrow by mitchie m

po pi po by lamaze p / go google it by wintermint p

black★rock shooter by ryo / bacterial contamination by kanimiso p

i like you, i love you by gevanni p / first love academy • school of true love by nem

(also a quick general note ! i don't have everything ready for a formal polished reveal at the time of posting this. i plan on updating this post with links to the songs and also a visual bracket when i have the time. they'll definitely be up soon, so make sure to check back in a bit for them ^^

i'll also make sure that reblogs are turned on for the final version!)

[thecherrygod]

Swap au Kim gets drunk and there's a sweet spot in which he's having the time of his life and manages to forget all that's fucked up in his existence just going with the flow and everyone besides him no matter who they are and how the treat him, but less drunk than that and he'll get sober too soon and everythings gonna hit him all at once making him feel twice as miserable, or he'll get even more drunk to the point it completely switches and the happiness and getting along with whoevers nearby morphs into over trusting and sad and as soon as someone is like "look man you're not fine you should go home" he takes it too personal and won't be against getting into fights

[eosphorusss]

Omg if you hate someone just unfollow them wasting your energy on that stuff is NOT worth it I promise 😭

the thing is i have!! and i have even tried blocking them!!! but this person is mutuals with 2 of my most beloved mutuals and they often add stupid remarks to the body of otherwise funny posts, which my mutuals then reblog. i feel like i cant escape help

[tommyssupercoolblog]

PERIOD. Like, even if your system is more individualistic like mine, this is still a thing. Like I don't see Seán, or Joey, or our core, or anyone else, as the same person as me; but they're all important and non-negotiable. you can't take one "part" of us and say you hate everyone else in our system, that's so offensive. We're a family. We support each other. Even alters I've never met have supported me, sometimes without even knowing it; we share so much of our lives that it's impossible not to affect each other, and a therapy appointment or step forward for one person is ultimately helpful for the collective as a whole as well.

If you live in a house with a lot of roommates then their mental health and life choices affect your own- that happens in systems too, and a lot stronger because you literally share both a body and a brain; we are a family and keeping the family unit as a whole healthy and happy is important. We have to support each other, and we care about each other and WANT to support each other too. It's not always easy, but it's something that matters to us. We don't always get along, but ultimately we're all important and we're all part of the same family; the same system.

Asking us not to talk about each other or not to switch (which we can't always control anyway) is asking us to shut out MOST of our lives and experiences, to hide almost everything.

And saying you don't want to interact with any of us but one is shitty because...what are you talking about, how DARE YOU, I love these people and I need them and we depend on each other. Say that to my face and I'll fucking lose it on you, I will BITE you, watch yourself.

You don't get to pick and choose. This is a package deal.

"I'm okay with you having DID, I just don't want to talk to or meet any of your alters."

I'm an alter too, you know. Every single time you've interacted with me, I'm an alter. Even before you knew I had DID, even before I knew I had DID, we've been speaking to each other as various different alters. To ask to only interface with one singular version of me because you find the other versions of me uncomfortable to be around is hurtful.

We have little to no control over who's fronting at any particular time. We switch a lot, that's the nature of my system. Even we don't know who's fronting all the time, not least because we're discovering new parts still all these years later.

And, ultimately, they're all me. If you've only met one version of me and like that one version of me, do you truly like me? If you've only ever gotten to know me in that particular mode, how well do you actually know me? How can you say you love me when there's all these other me's that you cast aside and ignore?

You can't say you're okay with my DID but then ask to never get to know my alters. Because, ultimately, that means you never get to know me. And that means you're not okay with my DID- or with me.

[mathmusicreading]

Blog(ger) Shift

I am, so weird and bad about original posting and about reblogging and about saving things on Tumblr and that's why my blog has been mostly inactive or the lurking consumer type. But I don't want my fears about putting myself out there, being seen and known, articulating myself well vs. having been told my whole life I'm too wordy and opinionated vs. not managing to articulate myself well enough to justify being verbose and passionate, etc. to continue to control me so much.

So for my new specific-interest sideblog that I'm not locking, I hope it being themed will help me with making more original posts and reblogging, and I'm publicizing that here to push myself and also welcome interaction.

RIP to my other public specific-interest sideblog and the fandom sideblog I took over for someone that I didn't take further and to my private sideblogs that were meant to make me reblog and save and say stuff because they would be personal and just for me. I still would like to make those happen and reblogging and posting things that matter to me here, and oh my heart for the content ideas I haven't been working on, but they're pipedreams with how I'm (not) managing my life and I keep kicking those cans down the road.

To the person who I developed a real relationship with as a beta but who by now I probably count as having disappeared on with how long it's been and my not coming back to explicitly say I still can't help and don't know when I can, I am so sorry. I'm being a coward languishing in hoping I can tell you soon that I can get back into beta-ing for you and talking, but that's turned into me not talking to you because I'm waiting to be able to say something positive. Hopefully my vaguing here can help push me into talking to you, or at least this is here for you to read if you happen to see it; and I want you to know you absolutely can talk to me, can call me out, and if you're so gracious as to still want to be friends with me and just chat despite my dropping being your beta, I'm here for you and still want to be your friend even if I don't know if I'll have the spoons to be a good one and I know my saying that preemptively isn't apology or justification enough.

Honest assessment, I'm going to curse and say my living situation and work have both become even more of a shitshow, and with those things in mind I can't begin to imagine handling a real project until basically literally a year from now.

Which segues back into the main topic of this post. My goal isn't to have my new sideblog be like an active mainblog nor to abandon this blog—people interested in that blog can and should still interact with me here given how primary vs. secondary blogs on Tumblr work, and in terms of using that blog to help make me be a better Tumblr user, I think I should make certain original posts here and reblog them there as opposed to them being original there. With my mental-emotional and time resources, I want that blog to be "active" for a given definition of active, but really I think I should see my objective as "clear out tabs and likes and photos and lists and notes and drafts, etc. from the last four months" by saving stuff there, as opposed to my goal being the original posts I want to make there, and actually my long-term goal should be to use that momentum to do the same for older digital and physical storage that hasn't been lost or stolen. In my failure to be an interesting person, do I at least manage to be fascinating as a basket-case? Ha. But, also, as expressed above the Read More, the exercise of my danmei/Chinese sideblog is supposed to be a foray into me allowing myself to be an interesting person.

[cepheusgalaxy]

WE'VE GOTTEN TO THE PART WHERE I STARTED DESCRIBING IMAGES GUYS NOW ITS FASTER