#it is 7 am and i havent slept yet

[hersurvival]

[godmodebeginswithlesbians]

morality, as a concept, sure seems to be used a lot more for manipulating people than for actually preventing harm, which is why i prefer the referring to it as personal beliefs

because saying something is "immoral" holds a hell of a lot more weight that "this goes against my personal beliefs/principals"

whether or not something causes harm or goes against your beliefs is not mutually exclusive, but its not necessarily the same thing either, which is why i think the idea of morality is quite dangerous

[geddy-leesbian]

The world if there was a luis's jacket for ashley mod so rosa could wear it

And idk she should maybe have ethan's hoodie or smth under it so she's got smth from both dads??

[minotauromachy]

i wish i wasn't in a constant state of Charlie Kelly Crashing A Car Because He "Forgot How To Drive" when it comes to art (and writing lol) bc i have a very clear vision of a specific deadpool fanart i wanna see in the world but my hands don't work for artistic purposes anymores

[savethepinecones]

hm

[lighthouseshepard]

I know you just had top surgery - how was it? How was the healing process? I’m scared to death of surgery but I desperately need these off

HI NYX!!! ok im gonna try and be as brief and concise as possible because theres honestly quite a lot i could talk about but! heres some thoughts under the cut

so honestly as someone who has had a few surgeries in the past for other medical issues - this ranked VERY low on the pain scale. maybe a 4/10 tops at its worst (although i do understand everyone is different). the surgeon kept telling me "many people do not find this operation particularly painful" and i did not believe him one bit until afterwards. i had prescription pain medicne and antibiotics to take, but honestly i only needed the prescription medicine for about 3 days, and then after that i was fine with tylenol. after a week really i didnt need to take anything consistently, it was here or there if i happened to start moving around too much.

the worst part for me overall was the BANDAGES. after you wake up youre gonna be wrapped within an inch if your life with ike 2 inches of gauze and tape and an ace wrap holding it all together. if you have drains (which i did) you can't shower until they're out and the bandages come off, anywhere from 5 to 7 days usually. mine was 7 days and i was miserable. the drain emptying wasnt that bad tbh, someone helped me the first 2 times and then i was able to do it myself afterwards. if youre bad with blood or bodily fluids then youll def need someone to help you there. the drain removal process, to be completely honest, was. also bad. it lasted maybe five seconds per drain but i didnt breathe right like they told me to and had a vasovagal reaction and passed out. i dont say this to dissuade you! but it was not pleasant

the main thing probably is gonna be stiffness and soreness. you literally won't be able to do anything with your arms for at least a few days - its bordering on 2 weeks for me and im just now able to pull a shirt over my head without stiffness. you DEFINITELY will need someone to help you with basic tasks those first few days, getting food, getting dressed, etc. some ppl get bruising on their chest just from the skin being manipulated and etc but surprisingly i havent had any bruising yet?

also!! again some places differ, but mine was a same day surgery. after a few hours of waking up i was able to be bundled into the car back to the hotel. youre gonna be really groggy but i was able to walk just fine, albeit very slowly with help. the surgery itself was the blink of an eye to me. i remember them putting an o2 mask over my face and then i was OUT. seconds later i was being dragged up out of unconscious well by the nurse's voice.

ill say too, i 100% understand the nervousness and fear. the 2 weeks leading up to the surgery were like. awful andnsnjf. i was so anxious and terrified of the pain only to find it genuinely was not that bad at all. you know the this too shall pass lighter i have. i slept with that clutched in my hand the entire night before surgery. it was very much a "do it scared" situation and having those things of comfort and reassurance whatever they are to you can help immensely. and i did do it! and the relief i felt a week after when i finally got to see made literally all of it worth it. theres still healing to go (i took a month off work also) but im taking it very slowly and trying not to rush enjoyment of this body c: most of the healing process has been letting the body do its natural work and being patient with it, a thing i am usually not. i still have to dress the area for another 2 weeks maybe, but then i can start scar care!!!

[carelessflower]

tuesday recap 🍜🌼

got 31/40 on final exam not living da liva loca right now

ofc the day of my important final exam i slept till 7 my brother hogged the bathroom for hours and hog it again I had to cook breakfast in the meantime and ate it my cab arrived late and my laptop shut down in middle of writing the old blog so NOW I HAVE TO REWRITE IT. choose this fit whatever, I need to look presentable

finished exam and lowkey feeling depressed so hitting quick instant noodle fix, sichuan sauce and special sausage with chilli powder this becoming my fav combo tho it less spicy than the last time

funny story my friend thought the exam on thursday and only get notified by me it on tuesday and she studied with me then she scored 35/40...i got rewards for it tho! the oreo was 8/10 the tiramisu havent eaten

then she had something urgent so she gotta dip and me just wandering around lol, and look at this corner i got to so often im pretty sure they had an evil agenda against me so this time i drop to a different corner

drop by libre again i just like this line idk. in order the far left one > silver > middle one

also they just open another perfume corners here, mugler, valentino, ralph and azzaro? thought it cool i obv sniff and not buy lol im broke and also busy asf. tried mugler alien goddess first cause look at this bottle lol. very tropical vibe idk how to explain it

og alien, the bottle so pretty this should be a light bulb lol, very very agressive jasmine like i am being attacked so much i develop stockholm syndrome

out of all the thing i sniff i only like this variation lol, it very bergamot your mom force you to eat cause it good for your health, the others are too intense and oily and chemical like for me

next is the niche corner i just discover, the sale associate was very friendly and talkative so i kinda dgaf he badmouthing me in his head! look at these two, vanilla powder is so creamy pastry with coconut custard filling and coconut sprinkle and french flower is so easy yet sophisticated yk, the pear is not noticable which i like cause i dont like pear. i put it in alec section of perfume and i stand by my judgement

check out another one with rave review blanche bete (the blurry pic is just my silly little girl complex dont worry, also the saleman said the bottle change from pure white marble to plush pink the longer u use isnt it cute). believe me it worth the hype it very cold metal turned warm lactonic with a twist. i also try this blood red one and it a magnus scent im CONVINCED like the alcohol note? add immeditately into magnus list

of course gotta check out ex nihilo for my alec pick...correct as always and i also like this scent too, such pretty peony

this one gotta be my fave sniff of the day, thickest chocolate ice cream ever, so decadent I really want a bottle like wow

this what look like when you overdose sniffing

went to 7/11 and there now baby bread there so I tried, 8.5/10 it spicy so it get bumped a notch

dinner with instant pho and meat! so spicy so yummy

[poopystain-moved]

its 7:40am i havent slept yet and i am losing my mind over the thought of the emotional scene where reigen is getting his shit knocked out by mobs tornado and the music in the background is life of riley by kevin macleod instead of 99 i cant take it anymore

[axorcia]

oi why is there a lizard in my room

its almost 7 am and i havent slept yet how did this guy get in ????

[nardonotes]

17 sep '24

7:42pm

here i am again with the "IM SO FUCKING TIRED" entry... well i am. what about it? im fucking exhausted. i was late today cause i half awake turned all my alarms off.. ૮(˶╥︿╥)ა i slept at like 1am last night and knocked out reading notes of a crocodile, so idk where i left off T-T...

im glad my lecturer was chill cause they barely started when i got there. we had like 4 hours of drawing,, we worked on perspective, and vanishing points and allat shit. it was fun and im learning to love drawing again. it's really fun and i think i prefer it over the design class right now. god im so tired what did i even do today. i finished class at 1pm and sat outside my backyard cause the weather was soooooo sososososooooo nice (๑-﹏-๑) and THEN my sister and her bf and i watched crime documentaries which kinda got me a lil spooked lol but now im too tired to do my research... it's already 8pm and i want to sleep by 11pm!! i havent even ate dinner yet oou.....

.·°՞(¯□¯)՞°·.

anywayy,, my schedule got changed today but only one class, and it's digital photography :)) so happy about that like im really doing something i like it's so fun hhuhhuhu....... !!

some good stuff happened today and im happy so, i hope tomorrow is as good as today hehhe,, goodnight to me!!! (⸝⸝ᴗ﹏ᴗ⸝⸝) ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

[sk1nn13-l0v3-06]

this is going to be more of a rant/vent post sorry guys

this is going to come out messy and hard to understand since i dont really know how to word all of this im just typing as the words come into my head,

i am really not doing ok at all, i dont even know how to explain the emotion im feeling since i have never felt it before, yeah i have had really depressive episodes many times over the past 7 years, i've had my fair share of panic attacks and attempts etc.

but this, i dont even know what this is, all i know is that i hate this feeling so much, i was starting to feel better a few days ago after feeling really low for a few months, but then out of nowhere this weird emotion hit me and hasnt gone away yet, i cant sleep and havent slept for 3 maybe 4 days, i find myself no being able to understand whats going on at points as if i just forget who i am and where i am and this will last for a few seconds before i just feel really weird, ill have this feeling of dread as if something really bad is about to happen, followed by extreme paranoia, ill feel extremely nauseous at random points in the day, then at some points ill just get this rush of su1cidal urges, all the things i just listed are the feelings that im experiencing that are accompanying the bigger feeling that i cant describe, if i was to try to explain the big feeling thats causing all this i would maybe say its like a discomfort? but to everything, my skin, the smells around me, the colours and temperature, like i mean EVERYTHING, and not in the overstimulated way, i mean in like an odd way that i literally want to end it all so i dont have to experience it anymore,

i also keep being convinced that there is people outside my window about to break in, or even things in my room but this part could just be due to the fact im extremely tired

anyway thats all, i just really wanted to get this out and see if anything knows what the fuck is going on right now because i have no clue what im experiencing

[moon3unny]

11.12.2023 - Monday

Alright so technically im writing this on tuesday since I forgot to write this on the same day. but basically what I had yesterday:

-cold brew coffee 2x

-1 mug soup 65kcal

tea?

thats it. did light exercise and I havent slept yet which is probably why my scale didnt move at all since yesterday. what do we learn from this: if u overdo ur liquid fasts and eat everything in sight it will in fact set you back on progress. if I dont loose weight till tomorrow even a little bit I might not get to 53kg by christmas (im 55,85kg appearently)

I have to stay up until my sisters parcel arrived bc they asked me to recive it on their behalves so I did an all nighter,,,,,,,,,, I hope rlly bad that they come rn to deliver it im so tired (its 8 am)

just came back from going out at literally 7 am to go buy more monster energy cold brew coffee and mug soup hhh

[geddy-leesbian]

i got many bizarre songs in my luis playlist but i think this is definitely the most unhinged pick by far but i don't care it gived ne the right vibes

[littlemisskittyy]

so i have a meeting later at 8:30 am est..

its currently 5:43 am est right now...

havent slept since i got off from work around 7 pm est...

yet im still prioritizing jjk fanfictions over sleep atm...

how will i survive the day?

send help.

[cerebralache]

its 7 am i havent slept yet and i got so emotional over this image of hatena i started crying

[astrxealis]

taking funny little gposes with my wol and raha makes my little heart swell in a funny nice way ... >_<