#it happens to be my gender actually
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This is shit looking but take it
(Yall im sorry I forgot Sherlock and anyone else 😭😭 I made this with characters I know and love)
#it happens to be my gender actually#autism#nuerodivergent#Holden ford#dale cooper#connor rk800#will graham#mindhunter#twin peaks#detroit become human#Hannibal#nbc hannibal#dbh#connor dbh#agent cooper#david lynch#autistic#Cooperposting
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I do not feel comfortable being openly homosexual in the company of “queer” people. Even hinting that I experience absolutely no attraction to the male sex is stressful, because often this results in a bunch of questions that equally feel like bafflement and interrogation. “What about THESE men?” No, not them either. No men. “But this man identifies as a woman!” I am not wired to be attracted to pronouns. “What about this man? He’s femme!” He is still a man, and I am still a lesbian. “So just no men at all?” YES. What is so hard to understand about that? Why can’t you just accept that female homosexuality exists, that it isn’t an evil ideology, and that it’s just how I and many other women are born? Why can you accept and understand so many things, but draw the line at a woman having no interest in the male sex?
#I think a lot of people like this are the straight and bi people who have convinced themselves they’re gay#and they genuinely believe that OSA is part of the gay experience#so when they come across an actual live homosexual they’re bewildered#I’m just so exhausted#so many times I’ve received some sort of shock or confusion when I tell people I’m not attracted to any men#they’re SURE that there has to be some exception#that there’s some loophole or workaround#that if they show me the right man or show me a man with the right identity I’ll admit that I’m attracted to him#they don’t understand that such thing will never happen because lesbians do exist#and they don’t understand how emotionally draining it is to have peolle constantly insisting otherwise#please just fucking leave lesbians alone and stop interrogating us about our natural sexuality#gender critical#my ramblings
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Can’t believe Dandadan made me believe in straight people again
#dandadan#momo ayase#ken takakura#okarun#momokarun#I want to eat them#they make me FERAL#two losers that match each other’s freak my beloved#two people of opposite gender being friends first then romance?? in MY shonen?#can’t believe that’s actually happening in the year of our lord and destroyer 2024#my bingo card predictions were so off lmao#marrapost
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I get the criticism of the Hunters of Artemis from a narrative perspective—it sucks that it essentially boots interesting female characters out of the story—but it always baffles me when people viciously hate Artemis for *checks notes* doing damage control.
Like. Thalia explicitly goes with Artemis to avoid the prophecy, and I definitely think that’s the reason Artemis tried so hard to get her to join—hell, you can view the hunters trying to recruit Annabeth as a way to get Thalia to join. And Bianca? You can’t convince me that Artemis didn’t guess there was something up there and react accordingly.
If Percy or Nico were even a little bit girl-adjacent you bet your ass she would be all over them to join. No one actually wants to risk the Great Prophecy happening, and Artemis is doing a hell of a lot more to stop it than anyone else.
#riordanverse#pjo#percy jackson#Artemis pjo#hunters of artemis#crack fic idea: Poseidon and Zeus have broken the oath several times before Thalia Jason and Percy. Artemis has just been hauling ass across#the country each time it happens. they have been so fucking lucky that their kids have been girl or girl-adjacent so far.#Artemis gets her info from Apollo (who gets pinged whenever a new potential prophecy child is born)#the hunters weren’t at westover to hunt thorn or even recruit Thalia. they were ACTUALLY there because Artemis got a text from her brother#like ‘lol the di angelo kids are out of the lotus hotel’#and Artemis is like gods FUCKING damnit hades I thought we had an understanding#OTHER fic idea: Bianca joins the hunters in the 30s and Nico goes to the casino alone#OTHER OTHER fic idea: Artemis can tell people’s gender sometimes before they can and now she has to crack trans Percy’s egg before she turns#sixteen so she’ll agree to join the hunters and put the prophecy off once again.#anyway. this has been my defense of Artemis.#eli rambles#eli writes
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Might be a hot take as a bkdk and tgck truther here, but I find izuocha endlessly fascinating, beautiful, but also tearfully tragic.
I see their love for each other as something representative of their innocence and naivety when they only knew so little about who they were, and what was to come.
I think the main barrier of their relationship is that its rooted in how they see each other very idealistically, specifically that they're attached to the image of their Best Heroic Selves, and not the deeply selfish, destructive, freaky, and egotistical parts of them. To each other, they need to keep fulfilling that image or else that same person they looked up to would almost die in front of them, and that would be too cruel. Although that hero is still there, that same person they looked up to is not the same now because of...well...everything.
Izuku had barely even talked to girls when he first met her. She was Izuku's first ever real friend (Sorry Kats, everyone and him knows he was terrible), so he saved her in that entrance exam even if it was so dangerous. She gave a new meaning to his derogatory nickname just by being a friend that believed in him. After that, she saved him several more times (Blackwhip and Megaphone are the biggest samples iirc). It makes perfect sense that she is Deku's hero.
Ochako hardly knew what it meant to be a hero when she first got into UA. Just by reaching out to some kid tripping, she made a new friend who would then save her in that exam, then save him again in return. This boy then became someone who was always working so hard to save everyone in trouble, and she realized she wanted to be just like him too. "I want to save people"
But...Deku changes. The weight of One for All is on his shoulders and he needs someone to carry this burden with him. He continues to want to save other people at the expense of himself, still not letting his true selfishness and ego ever show- and it only grows more and more unbearable.
Then...Ochako fell in love with Himiko. Truly, relentlessly, selfishly and devotedly in love with a girl who then dies giving her blood to her- the greatest expression of love Himiko could ever give.
Not that they can't love each other because of this happening (and...so many other things oh god), I'm honestly not sure how to explain it- But them ending up together after losing that innocence and naivety? After Ochako will forever grieve the girl who showed her love in its most beautiful and ugly form? After Izuku changed so fundamentally as a person that the butterflies of a nice girl talking to you doesn't exist anymore? After that simple image of being a hero and being in love has completely changed for them both?
Even so, I believe they still love each other. There is no label I know of that can properly describe them though. They are each other's image of being a hero when it comes to saving people. Aside from Shoto, no one else can grasp the grief of the person you tried to save dying in your hands. They would no doubt try to cope with these losses together, and just try to get better together...but so much has changed. They've changed. The world changed. What are they now? Who are they now?
"What happened...to us?"
#I just think the tragedy of falling out of love for the person who represents who they Used to be is so...so painful#Kacchan isn't even here yet and it's already so complicated.#also. Izch healing together after all this would also be really nice#if u like them ending up together thats also perfectly fine too. im just a bkdk and tgck truther myself. thats kinda my whole thing#but izch forming a deep bond from their experiences and saving eachother#and maybe later on trying to date too...oh boy#and them being able to just...be more casual again. talk abt their lives and dreams together too just so they know they have each other#oh itd be so healing and beautiful#im so glad izuku talked to ochako on that cliff man oh man...#izuocha the underrated tragic love that they could've been if ppl werent so close minded abt them#only the real izch fans understand just how much these two actually mean to each other. god bless yall I swear even if I dont ship ship it#thank u to that person who wrote abt them being characters than run in parallel#that narrative structure for them is permanently in my brain. I love these two so much its no joke#my Extra hot take is that izch wouldve been treated better by the fandom if it was gay.#but we'd still agree on bkdk as the endgame after all that happened. maybe. idk this is a hypothetical.#if you switch ock and kats genders...this wouldve been a very different story and fandom. insane food for thought with this one.#ok thats my yap for the night oh god i have so many feelings about them...#evelynpr bnha#bnha#mha#my hero academia#izuocha#actually confidently putting this tag now. sorry for the angst you guys...and maybe being seen as a traitor#im a strong girl I could take on potential haters hahaha...#izuku midoriya#ochako uraraka
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…it’s not queerbaiting if a bisexual woman ends up with a man. especially not if that’s been set up as a possibility. i understand wanting the sapphic endgame, but she still likes girls either way and she’s still queer either way. team. babes.
edit: please note that i'm bi, and i enjoy sapphic ships (in part because i am sapphic). what i don't enjoy is when people call bisexual identity queerbait.
#xo kitty#like no matter what happens in the endgame. not bait#it only will be that if they decide. no she’s actually straight. it was a phase#which they’ll never do because they’d get in massive trouble#also the endgame of a bi character shouldn’t be based on gender <3#(sometimes if it’s ab a pattern that’s different and a societal thing. and not the case here!)#my being bi shouldn't be needed but someone vagueposted ab me saying they were queer so it hurt and. buddy...
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what I was talking abt earlier. we have fully looped back around and away from feminism, societally, whereas before it was very Feminism 101 to acknowledge that many parts of existing as a woman in a misogynistic society are painful and upsetting. not that being a woman is Inherently Negative in a bubble. but that living on this earth, in the conditions we're living in, is hostile to women. and that gender is a performance. that many of the Staples Of Femininity as accepted by society are things that you have to create and perform and mold artificially and aren't inherent, that COMPLAINING about day to day difficulties of existing as a woman is something that you're allowed to do. acknowledging these basic, again, feminism 101 things, that something tied to womanhood is more time consuming or more expensive or more dangerous Because Of The Problems. does not CREATE the problems. that when women complain about having to perform femininity, they are not, in fact, oppressing themselves. the call does not come from inside the fucking house. saying that you HAVE suffered does not fucking equate that you believe you SHOULD have suffered.
like I could talk about this for hours. how braindead and one-dimensional the Takes are getting. "being a woman is looking in the mirror and going fuck yeah i'm a woman" damn. I guess any negative experiences you have by living in a misogynistic world... are your fault if you are anything but positive? "you don't actually want liberation" we've fully gone back to telling feminists "you WANT to be oppressed" when anything negative about our society is pointed out. it's not real until I say it out loud, I guess, and then I'm actually the one who caused it. if anybody expresses any unhappiness with how they're treated or the status quo or the language and culture surrounding womanhood and femininity. they've created it, right that second. they invented it just now. it wasn't a problem before somebody complained, right? also trans women aren't braindead zombies who just follow the flow of whatever cis women around them say. I am pretty fucking sure they are very much aware of pain, and are MORE than aware of the swirling torrent of misogyny and standards of femininity than anybody else. actually. and I am pretty sure someone complaining on tumblr that being a woman means always putting on a performance is going to make someone change their mind about transitioning. also "performing femininity" as a necessity to being treated well as a woman is not fucking NEWS to your Local Trans Woman. I AM PRETTY SURE SHE GETS THE CONCEPT. using trans women as a scapegoat for this braindead perspective on gender politics is spineless, meritless, and pathetic.
#how I feel about my gender is not the same as how I feel about the living conditions of my gender#when I saw that post I screenshotted here I literally sat w my mouth open for a minute#sent it to my friends and was like am I fucking crazy. is this what we're doing now#Forced Positivity and that there is no war in ba sing se and actually#you're ruining children's lives if you complain about misogyny on twitter#I don't HAVE to tell little girls about the downsides because they are already being mistreated#before they have even heard the word 'misogyny' let alone know what it means#you do not have to be fucking happy all the time about the cards you're dealt.#you don't live in a bubble where it's just you and your mirror and your pretty dress and nothing bad has ever happened to you#unfortunately bitch. we will have negative experiences that are in fact. part of the package of being a woman#and IGNORING them doesn't make them not exist. actually they will continue to remain status quo unless acknowledged#sergle.txt#I see so much rhetoric that is JUST old-fashioned gender ideals being presented with liberal language on tiktok#that is just telling women that womanhood is just being a girllll and loving pretty things and being kind and gentleeeee and nurturing#and not working and just like being wholesome and being happy and being a light in ppl's lives and just LOVING LOVING LOVING being a woman#so if for even one second. you don't love it. you are actually failing at being a woman#if you complain about the standards for shaving or putting on makeup. which used to be Baby's First Feminism online#that's actually just you creating problems. you're not supposed to acknowledge it. you're supposed to shut up and smile into the mirror.
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#clone high#this is the shittiest thing ive ever drawn but i need to explain my vision#ALSO just in case making topher say this is like. completely neutral. ot just happens to be a discoudse topic#i have my own opinion but we arent going to fight about it#i jsut think this whenever i see people draw him with that flag LOLL#actually hang on i just reLzied its usually gender and sexuality alliance now#topher would be on top of that
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hi Silver! o/ because that fanart made me wonder - would you happen to know when/where Dick's stuffed elephant plush Zitka turns up in the comics?
GREETINGS CAM <3333 THAT ART WAS SO CUTE
Yeah, I think your instincts are right - it's a truly adorable bit of transformative fandom, but I'm 95% percent sure it's not comics canon. Barbara has canon plushies, but I don't think anyone else does.
I got kinda invested in the investigation (it's hard to prove a negative!) and I ended up typing out an entire History of Elinore/Zitka, so, uh, if you're curious, meet me below the cut for:
Where does Elinore / Zitka - the animal - appear in comics?
Did Dick ever have a stuffed elephant toy in comics?
Where does Elinore / Zitka appear in comics?
We're gonna go in chronological order!
Dick's circus elephant friend was first created for practical reasons: in Batman 436, Marv Wolfman does a big expanded flashback to Dick's circus backstory as a way to subtly show us Tim before officially introducing him (so that we can have a technically-solvable mystery-of-Tim's-identity in LPoD). In this comic, there's an elephant named Elinore who loves Dick:
Aww. Such a cute elephant!
Batman 436 comes out in August 1989. New Titans 60 comes out a few months later, in November, and guess what? When Dick visits the circus, he is suddenly surprised by an unexpected blast from the past! It turns out that even though it's been years, Elinore still remembers him!
Here's the part where Elinore remembers Dick:
SUCH a cute elephant. I love her.
(Guess who else still remembers Dick even though it was so long ago. Guess which other character is about to be an unexpected blast from the past. Guess which character Elinore is directly paralleling guess guess guess sorry everything is about Dick and Tim in my mind but I can focus I swear)
Four years later, in 1993, Batman: The Animated Series retells Dick's origin story. They like and keep Wolfman's elephant, but they change her name to Zitka:
Wolfman doesn't return to the elephant beyond those two appearances, and a few years down the line, New Titans gets cancelled and Wolfman's not writing Dick anymore anyway. So the animal gets abandoned for a while, until Devin Grayson, a fan of both Wolfman and B:tAS, revives the Wolfman-era Titans team in JLA/Titans and then the ongoing series Titans 1999.
Grayson then brings back the elephant in a flashback to Dick's past in Titans 16 (Jun 2000), where she imports the B:tAS name. Sometimes I'm skeptical of TV-to-comics imports, but honestly, I endorse this one. You lose the alliteration, which is a shame, but IMO Zitka is a better elephant name than Elinore.
Here's Dick with the newly-christened Zitka in Titans 16:
Grayson also briefly references the elephant in Gotham Knights 20 and - in a final angsty callback - in Nightwing 88 (Feb 2004), where Zitka tries futilely to comfort Dick in the midst of his trauma conga line:
... And... honestly, I think that's it for comic appearances? The two Wolfman comics plus the three Grayson comics.
Both Wolfman and Grayson are writing multiple titles - Batman, New Titans, Titans, Gotham Knights, and Nightwing between the two of them, spanning a big chunk of Dick's post-Crisis canon - and both writers use the elephant for heartwarming moments of nostalgia, which means if you're doing a post-Crisis readthrough for Dick, Elinore/Zitka feels memorable. But I don't think she actually shows up that much.
For post-2011, I am not as well-informed - throwing this out to the dash? anyone know? - but I feel like Zitka the heartwarming symbol of Dick's heartwarming circus past is, uh, thematically very at odds with the Court of Owls evil!circus vibes, so my instinct is that this story element was almost certainly dropped in the reboot.
Did Dick ever have a stuffed elephant toy in comics?
In WFA, yes; in main comics continuity, no. Technically, I have not read every comic ever published, so I could be wrong!! But I don't think so.
Below, find my rambling reasoning on the tonal vibes of pre-Crisis, post-Crisis, and post-2011, and why this particular story element doesn't seem right to me for the first two.
Pre-Crisis (...okay, mostly the Silver Age): stuffed animal, yes or no?
tl;dr no, requires too much background knowledge on the part of the reader, plus the elephant wasn't a thing until later
Elinore doesn't get created until post-Crisis, but also just generally, pre-Crisis callbacks are more along the lines of this reference in Batman 129 (published in 1960), where, wow, Batman and Robin are hunting jewel thieves - and it turns out Robin recognized this strongman! BUT HOW?!
The comic goes on to recap Dick's entire origin story in flashback, on the assumption that you may not know it.
(BTW, if you'd like to know more about Haly's Circus throughout the years, nightwingology has a great post here summarizing a lot of fun plotlines and characters!)
Basically: Silver Age comics are very self-consciously episodic and kid-friendly; they're not generally gonna do overly-elaborate callbacks because they don't know what comics their kid readers may have randomly picked up or remember.
By the time of post-Crisis, comic books were being written for an adult audience buying from the direct market, i.e. readers who are collecting whole runs & don't need or want Dick's origin story to be recapped to us in full every time it's referenced. That's why in post-Crisis, we get stuff like "hey, neat, this particular soda brand is getting mentioned in several different books!!" or "in order to understand this story arc, buy SIXTEEN DIFFERENT COMICS in FIVE DIFFERENT RUNS and read them ALL ACCORDING TO A NUMBERED ORDER and also you better be following the individual plotlines and recognize these five minor characters who we don't bother to introduce!! Good luck!!" But the elaborate post-Crisis plotlines - and subtler worldbuilding like a stuffed animal callback to Dick's backstory - don't make a lot of story sense UNLESS you're imagining your readers as completionist adult fans.
So IMO a stuffed animal wouldn't be a pre-Crisis thing unless it was The Episodic Story Of the Week, and I don't think a stuffed animal is action-adventure-y enough for the fast-paced storytelling of the Silver Age. (Unless it, like, came to life and tried to eat you or something.)
Post-Crisis: stuffed animals, yes or no?
tl;dr: no, Dick's a manly tough guy, he's not gonna have a stuffed animal, that'd be lame, like something Tim might do
Part of the edgy grimdark adult vibes in 80s/90s comics is that some characters who used to be kinda silly & goofy & lighthearted - like Batman and Robin - get reimagined as Serious and Angsty and Edgy in a Tough Cool Manly Brooding Way. This massively affects characterization for Bruce, Dick, and Bruce and Dick's relationship.
(I obviously love this change & love the tense Bruce-and-Dick interactions, but plenty of fans of the earlier fluffy comics really disliked the edgy retcons of Miller / Wolfman / Starlin / et al.)
The upshot is that post-Crisis is a period when you could have a recurring reference like a stuffed elephant, but you wouldn't have a stuffed elephant, not for Dick. I think a toy like that would be too cutesy / childish / effeminate to give a male character in post-Crisis, unless you were poking fun at him.
Now, you could probably let Tim have a stuffed animal, because Tim is sometimes cool but also sometimes a tryhard loser who is faking being cool and not entirely pulling it off (see e.g. the Robin comic where he practices tough-guy faces in the mirror, or the Teen Titans comic where Conner discovers his cringy Enya CD, or when he's fanboying over Connor and it's awkward, etc etc.). A stuffed animal would be deeply embarrassing, and you'd have to be careful to compensate by having Tim do something cool afterward - but Tim's character concept allows for "he's kind of a loser sometimes."
But Dick isn't!! In post-Crisis, Dick's a tough / impressive / "cool guy" character, the kind of guy anyone would want to be, even in the flashbacks where he's Robin, and even in the stories where he's more lighthearted than angsty. It'd be kinda lame for Dick to have a stuffed elephant, so he wouldn't. I feel like Dick would be more likely to poke fun at it if someone had one, like when he's making fun of Wally for liking the Hardy Boys. Dick could have a Batman action figure, at most, and if he had one he would have it ironically.
Basically: in post-Crisis, a male character hugging a stuffed elephant feels more likely to be a punchline to me, not something poignant. (Even with Tim, Tim could have an embarrassing stuffed animal, but he couldn't hug it when sad - that's too far. Maybe Booster Gold might do this. Probably he wouldn't, but spiritually, he would. Sorry Booster ilu! <3)
Instead, Dick instinctively deals with his inner turmoil like the TORTURED ACTION HERO he is: by punching things and brooding and yelling and joining the mob and sleeping on rooftops and going on obsessive secret missions and acquiring Angsty Stubble!! Just like Batman!
(Technically I don't know if Bruce ever joined the mob but you know he would.)
Anyway as you know this is my favorite continuity and I am poking fun affectionately, but uh, yeah sdfsfdsfs. No stuffed animals.
Post-2011 / Infinite Frontier / Wayne Family Adventures: stuffed animals, yes or no?
tl;dr it's in WFA! Probably not anywhere else, but it could be.
Post-2011 stuff tends to be cutesier overall, most of all in the current Infinite Frontier era. So I don't feel like this would be tonally out-of-line with IF comics. Taylor tends to go for more meme-y references rather than fanfic references, though.
So the obvious best fit is WFA, which is aiming for a rough approximation of Silver Age family-friendly vibes - wholesome, episodic plots, Teaching Good Moral Lessons For The Youth, etc. - plus lots of Easter eggs for fanfic readers and some comic references.
And look, here we are:
Aww.
Whew - that's everything I could find!
Anyway as you can probably tell, I LOVE the elephant, so this was a very entertaining rabbit hole to go down, thank you <3
#dick grayson#anyone with more info feel free to chime in & we can crowdsource <3#i do think the toy elephant is awfully cute though <3#total digression but i was thinking about it as i was writing:#i'm fascinated by the ways that the post-crisis batboys & their stories can intersect with 90s masculinity and all its issues with stoicism#and i'm pro-queering and gender-bending - 90s comics were a total boys' club so i think it's neat that transformative fandom isn't#but i do love 90s masculinity and All Its Issues too & one of the things i find compelling about the dick-tim-bruce trio#& especially dick's place in it - is the unspoken hierarchy whereby bruce is manlier than dick & dick is manlier than tim#and so dick's in the middle as this somewhat softer-character who aspires to be a harsher & more stoic & ultimate manly-man character#caught in the middle between robin & batman & what each role represents#and like. batman is both manhood & the only desirable thing to be AND ALSO it represents this immense narrowing of possibility#because so much of stereotypical masculinity is about reducing the range of emotions you're allowed to have or express#and dick is both incredibly conflicted about bruce AND wants to be just like him & by extension is conflicted about masculinity writ large#so a lot of dick's interactions with tim veer between trying on a frat-boy-ish 'I'm The Manly Guy' persona vs. giving up on it#or trying on imitations of Bruce's Batman persona but also trying to backtrack out of it bc he doesn't like how it feels etc etc#ANYWAY i think what i am trying to say is that if tim had a stuffed animal dick would be entertained & poke mild fun at him#and call him 'teddy' for the next hour or something while tim got increasingly defensive about how the teddy bear was steph's#and/or about how the teddy bear was OLD and tim doesn't even care about it and also WHATEVEr i'm above this#and to an uninformed observer this might look like bullying BUT ACTUALLY#this ritual would IN FACT be very reassuring to both of them + tim would feel WAY better afterward than if dick had ignored it#because by poking fun at him dick shows he still respects tim enough to tease him thus subtextually exorcising the threat of wimpiness#plus allowing tim to defend himself & demonstrate that he can take a joke so they've both reaffirmed their masculinity to each other#& they don't have to be scared of the teddy bear and all it represents anymore#however also afterward dick would have a brief nostalgic flashback to when he was a kid & had a teddy bear & feel weird about the memory#because he would be unable to articulate to himself that what he misses is a past when he allowed himself to be vulnerable#anyway this wouldn't actually happen in comics but it's what would happen in my soul. you know.#ask tag#zitka
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it's so funny to me when people just believe that john is straight because he said "i'm not a homosexual" once because
1. you are believing the words of a 13 yr old who was 12 the day before.
2. people forget that he's 13 when he said that, and that he is not old enough for a proper romantic relationship.
3. john egbert doesn't think. in fact, he'd rather not AT ALL. like. EVER.
4. why would he think about ever liking a girl? can't he just say it out right if he does?
also, this part in a nutshell:
karkat: DO YOU WANNA BE IN A RELATIONSHI-
john: i am not a homosexual. 👍
5. god king of repression had you fooled FOOL.
and the most ironic part is that it's the same shit homophobic parents say like "yeah, but when you were 13 you said you liked girls soooo"
#homestuck#john egbert#homestuck analysis#hs analysis#hs meta#IT HAS BEEN 14 FUCKING YEARS#man :/#there is literally no need to post about this only if homestuck fans could actually read#john egbert was queer this whole time? the horror!#literally what his gag was all about lmao#argument happened in twt about johns gender/sexuality instead of saying that hes just queer couldve just ended everything#LMAO#a twt qrt mentioned that this post was about defending my yaoi ship? which is literally not? theyr using it as a reason hate on me lol#i love john egbert so much its painful. dirk strider can die because he failed ME so idrc
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a slightly angsty idea i had shortly after sausage said his fantasy smp character is transmasc
#fantasy smp#mythicalsausage#fan!mythicalsausage#my art#i actually wanted to get this done a while back but life happened#im happy with the result#hell this is probably the prettiest mythicalsausage i've ever drawn#idea is his gender potion's effect ran out while he was asleep and he scrambled to find the other dosis in a panic#from being back to his old self#it was so fucking weird to draw a sausage that doesnt look like sausage
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transfem loop + siffrin... you agree
i does agree.... i does in fact ... write a 7k word essay on the subject..... if you would like to perhaps click that link and read it if you were not already aware...... kisses u on the forehead......... sorry its that long but i had to cover all of my bases you know how it is with textual analysis when you're trying to draw a distinction between "headcanon" and "reading of the text" because those are different things.... to meeeeeeee.......
#a headcanon is when i say shit like loop has feetie pyjamas.#a reading of the text is when i go jesus christ dude im not sure someone that repressed has a particularly great grasp on their ideal Self#lucabytetalks#isat spoilers#back on the homestuck tangent sometimes i think about how ppl picked up on the trans coding of roxy but were so set in their ways that#they thought it mustve been in the past and not a potential future... and then got real mad about a character being like.#complexly transmasc with a nuianced relationship to gender and not Easily Brushed Off Before The Narrative Begins Binary Trans Woman#one of the few times i think ive seen it be That way around? but i think it comes down to that whole. visible transgenderism happening#during the plot vs Invisible transgenderism that shh its okay you dont have to actually think about you can just say for brownie points#BUT MAYHAPS THAT IS MEAN. mayhaps that is mean. but i know what i saw back in the day.#sighs homestuck tangent over anyway uhhh yeah hold on isat fans ill throw you a new bone instead of getting off topic uhhh#isabeau seems like such a pragmatic planner to me i think theyve got contingency plans for whatever family they want to have in future#logical nerd with his transition timeline planned out and it includes a flowchart with an 'IF partner has X then i need Y to have a kid'#shrodingers op isabeau . guy with a gender spreadsheet and punnet squares. i think it being that methodical is funny#it also speaks to his occasional hesitance but thats too dark of a read i think im not going to stake anything serious on that#i have thoughts on isa but they're more obviously aligned with what he literally says with his words in-game. not really much worth#elaborating on besides poking at how his insecurities and appeasement to others might inform his literal decisions#i have maybe a few bullet points in my head for him. not 7k words
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being ace means i don't get giggly or horny about omegaverse aka abo but instead become painfully obsessed with details in anatomy and world building
#for one the whole abo dynamic thing in wolves is false#for another the animal kingdom is SO wild#like. female hyenas have pseudopenises and dominate males#seahorses and male birth#eating your children to avoid them being eaten by predators#males killing children to free females to mate#community child rearing!#females doing the hunting!#CLOWNFISH#omegaverse#abo#imagine if your secondary gender is determined by the social dynamics of where you grew into it#mostly female/child bearing? guess you get a penis now#do you think all alphas have piss kinks cuz of territory marking shit#anglerfish...octopodes that hand off their sperm sacks to females...#i know a strange amount of stuff about animal sexuality i just realized this#did you know some species dont have periods? they just reabsorb the uterine lining which is fucking amazing and im very mad humans dont#do that too#on the other hand. ive seen abo aus where male omegas give birth by LOSING ALL THEIR TEETH and VOMITING AN EGG#my main complaint is that abo doesnt get weird enough (plz not losing teeth and egg vomiting weird tho)#also can we PLEASE think a little more on the 'birthing from the ass' thing? please?#listen you have a right to mpreg (and trans men exist) but like. PLEASE. that baby should NOT be born thru the poop chute#ik some animals feed their babies poop (and human anatomy is like half an inch away from the birth canal being the poo canal) but COME ON#also why are all the scents like. very specific objects/concepts#flowers and idk blood?#frankly i think they would just be. animal smells but with enhanced human noses they'd be easily distinguishable#my headcanon is that they act like peacock tails do. meant to show off how cool you are#the biting thing happens in sharks (tho i think its cuz theyre kinda silly like that) but it just reminds me of people tattooing bite marks#and not cleaning the wound or yknow actually biting their partner in the tattoo parlor?#i get it. i'd love to be consumed by the void and a non recommendable amount of teeth. but can you be more sensible about it
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One year of Being Trans - A Review
If I timed this right, this post goes up exactly one year after I realized I was trans. Like, down to the hour. A lot happened since then.
I did some trial and error with labels, decided none really fit me, but settled on nonbinary transmasc to communicate it to others.
Picked the world's most stereotypical trans name for myself.
Came out to friends pretty much immediately, family to come soon.
Tried on a binder and fucking hated it.
Made this blog to organize my thoughts.
Deliberated on pronouns and how I want them to be used.
Came out to my therapist. Got a written confirmation for being trans. Scheduled an HRT consultation. Came out to several more doctors.
Developed a new, different kind of body image issues. Possibly dysphoria? Maybe just internalized fatphobia but for a different gender.
Worried about whether this new, more authentic, me might be unlikeable especially to my friends.
Looked at pictures of top surgery results and almost cried.
Hated my periods more than ever before.
Managed to schedule a top surgery consultation (one year in advance because waitlists are crazy like that)
Scheduled a different HRT consultation because the original one cancelled on me.
Learned a lot about trans issues and the hurdles in Germany.
Watched a new law pass to enable easier changes of legal name and gender.
Officially and legally changed said name and gender through said law!! Got a new ID, too. Started changing my name on all sorts of official documents.
Cried to at least one Philosophy Tube video.
Cried a lot, in general.
Watched a verdict take effect that allows health insurance companies to deny gender-affirming treatments.
Fought with my Health Insurance. Fought with the Committee that has the power to change these regulations again. Oh yeah also watched my government fall apart in real time and next up is eternal conservative leadership forever lol. Fought with my health insurance some more.
Wrote more goddamn emails than any person should have to in a lifetime.
Overheard my roommates talk about me with my new name and pronouns, several times.
Discovered a near eternal amount of bizarre gendered concepts hidden in my brain. (did you know hair is girlier if it curls right instead of left?)
Stopped hating my reflection. Started hating my reflection, but for other reasons. (Honestly I'm pretty sure that one's a depression thing)
Learned a lot about myself.
Fully moved past the concept of gender as it's enforced today.
Played a Pokemon game with my real name for probably the first time since I was 9.
Learned an absurd amount of platypus facts.
Felt so drained and tired almost every day, fighting for my basic rights and personal fulfillment.
Lived more as myself than ever before in my whole life. Finally took an interest in the person I am. Finally took my existence into my own hands. Finally dared to become someone, rather than just be.
Overall score: 9/10, wouldn't miss it for the world.
#and technically i could just stop ykno. get my ass back into the closet and just stay there. but i dont want to. and thats what matters#trans#ramble#transgender#crimes against the gender convention#genderqueer#lgbtq#nonbinary#queer#i think theres two really similar quotes that really resonate with me and my experiences#theres that one about being trans for the same reason god gave us wheat but not bread - so we could partake in the bliss of creation#and “the goal is an excuse to experience the process” (about life in general but i think it fits)#its just a nice sentiment. to actually enjoy the thing thats happening rather than holding out for the result.#also oskar wildes thing about not being a noun because thats restrictive but instead being a verb#my verb is “transcend”. for both accuracy and the pun.#trans experience#long post
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Hey Pia! Have you ever written or considered writing fat characters? Not because I think anyone is obligated to, just genuinely curious. I hope you’re doing well!
Hi anon!
For main characters, I think the only ones have been Hank from Eversion (a fanfic on my thespectaclesofthor account) and The Iron Bull from Stuck on the Puzzle, though Cullen doesn't mention it much, the one time he specifically mentions Bull having a thick layer of fat over his muscles, it's specifically to say that he likes that soft strength. As side characters in fanfiction there's also Aidhe, and I feel like I'm forgetting someone but I don't remember all the characters I've written T.T
As side characters in my fiction, there's also Aleutia, Fenwrel, Mikkel, an unnamed wolverine shifter in The Ice Plague, and probably others I'm forgetting. For characters who would be considered smaller fats in our world, there are also characters like Ondine!
It's still not as much representation as I'd like, but I experience dysmorphia when I write characters due to my own internalised fatphobia (I'm a fat person with an EDNOS around restrictive eating, my dietitian has me under pretty firm instructions to avoid triggers where possible / in my control, so when I do write fat characters, it's overwhelmingly in worlds or contexts where no one views that negatively, which is why it's sometimes easy for folks to miss. But I do also under-describe it, which heads back to my own personal issues, I think).
#asks and answers#this is like 'do you write nonbinary characters'#and it's like 'well yes but not as many as i'd like theoretically because'#'gender dysphoria exists and you know if you're doing this for a living#writing about something that can make you suicidal sometimes#that you're in therapy for#is actually not a great way to make a living' sadlfkjads#so my activism in fatphobia does not happen in my writing#as much as it happens irl
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As much as I understand people being disappointed that Mizukis gender wasn’t explicitly stated in Ena5 we also have like at least 3 more Mizuki events left like we’ll probably get to it later is all (hopeful)
Like what else are Mizukis events going to be about realistically lol
#maybe they just want the Official Gender Reveal in an actual mizuki event idk#even though she already came out like idk maybe yuuki will visit again and be like how’s my beautiful baby sister doing!! idk#I have to have hope it’ll happen eventually cause what else are the future mizuki events going to be about otherwise#project sekai#mizuki akiyama#ena shinonome
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